Thinking Over
by TurnMyGriefToGrace
Summary: Mainly a MerDer story. Maybe the other characters. My Season 4 continuation after 4.11 in which I attempt to fix things. Hopefully a good healing fic. Enjoy.
1. Thinking Over

**Disclaimer: If it was mine, episode 4.11 would NOT have ended that way.**

**But because it did, I feel like I have to write this. I'm a bit o****f a mess right now. So this is**** my therapy.**

**Spoiler alert: If you haven't watched episode 4.11 yet, and you're planning to, you might not want to read this.**

**The song is ****in italics. It's ****called "Thinking Over" by Dana Glover.**

_I've been searching for a reason_

_And I'm running out of time_

_I can feel that it's the season_

_It's time to make up my mind_

Meredith walked into her bedroom that evening. She looked pale. She looked shattered. Like there was no hope left. As if any trace of happiness had been taken away. It was over. But she didn't understand why. It was like it was happening in slow motion. Meredith wasn't even sure she'd fully comprehended what happened. It couldn't really be over could it? Was that even possible?

She crawled into bed next to Cristina, not even bothering to change her clothes. Meredith just stared at the ceiling, taking in shallow breaths.

Cristina looked over at her friend. "Hey, are you okay? You look sick", she said as she felt her forehead, checking to see if maybe she had a fever.

"Not sick. Just…I don't even know. I don't know what I am anymore", Meredith said with a sigh, trying her best to fight back the tears welling in her eyes.

"What happened today?", Cristina asked her, a genuine look of concern in her face. Cristina knew not to be snarky with her. There was something wrong with Meredith. Her person. The one that had been there for her in the past. She wanted to help. Usually Meredith got into bed and they would complain about their crappy days. Cristina would whine about Dr. Hahn. Meredith would share inappropriate details of her break up sex with Derek. Not tonight. Tonight, there was something wrong.

Meredith just shook her head and wiped away a tear that began to fall down her cheek.

_And I can't really tell you what I'm gonna do_

_There are so many thoughts in my head_

_There are two roads to walk down and one road to choose_

_So I'm thinking over the things that you've said_

_Thinking over the things…_

Cristina sat up and looked Meredith in her eyes. The green eyes that were usually bright. Expressive. Now they just look glassy, distant, pained.

"Okay. Look, we can sit here all night. Or you can just tell me what's wrong. Maybe I can help", Cristina told her, her voice stern, but still kind.

Meredith contemplated what Cristina had said. Why not just tell her? It didn't matter now anyway. "It's…over. And I don't…what do I do? This morning, he…he was sitting at my kitchen table, showing me house plans…and now…what the hell happened?", she said, as if wondering to herself.

_I'm thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_The things that you've said_

_And I'm thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_Thinking over the things…_

"Derek showed you house plans?", Cristina asked.

"Yeah. He had these blueprints spread out in front of me. Telling me about bedrooms. And backyards. And Victorian doors. He called in "my house." "Our house", she said, tears now free falling down her face.

"And what did you do?", Cristina asked, trying to process why Meredith was hysterically crying.

"I dropped an egg on the floor. Then I wiped it up. And then everybody came into the kitchen cause I made breakfast. And Derek put the house plans back into the cardboard tube", Meredith said, recalling every detail she could remember, as if trying to piece together where exactly things went wrong.

"You made breakfast?", Cristina asked her.

"I was trying. Making an effort with Lexie. Proving to myself that maybe I could be that person. The person that tries to reconcile with their stepsister. The person that cooks breakfast for her friends. The person that Derek wants to marry", Meredith confessed.

"Marry?", Cristina asked, somewhat shocked.

"Yeah. A few weeks ago…a few weeks ago he told me he wanted to marry me. Have kids with me. Build a house. He wants a lifetime. But…tonight I realized…it's not me he wants that lifetime with. It's whoever was willing to give him. Now. Not when I'm ready to give it to him. Now", she said, her voice cracking as more tears formed in her eyes. "He said he'd wait. And…he didn't."

_Am I ready for forever?_

_Oh, God, show me a sign_

_'Cause if we're to be together_

_Then it's got to be divine_

Cristina was silent for a minute, trying to think of something to say to her friend. "When was this exactly?", she asked. It was the only thing she could think to say to her.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know. Four weeks ago?"

"And he's done. Done waiting. He gives you an ultimatum. And because you're not ready when it's convenient for him, he's moving on", Cristina asked, putting the puzzle pieces together.

_And I can't really tell you what I'm gonna do_

_There are so many thoughts in my head_

_There are two roads to walk down and one road to choose_

_So I'm thinking over the things that you've said_

_Thinking over the things_

"I just…I thought he noticed. He knows I was trying. I dealt with my mother. I'm trying to make it work with Lexie. I told him I didn't want him to date anybody but me. I'm doing everything I can to be…what he wants me to be. What the hell happened?", Meredith said softly. "And then I find out he's kissing nurses. He says_ I'm_ not ready for a relationship and he can't even be loyal. I…I love him enough not to do that to him. I know how much that hurts. Seeing him with Addison. That hurt me. I wouldn't do that to him, Cristina. I would never do that to him. So why did he do it to me?"

"I don't know", Cristina answered honestly. "You're right. It's not fair."

"It's not", she cried. "It's really not."

"Yeah", Cristina sighed, rubbing Meredith's arm in an attempt to comfort her.

"What makes it worse is that I had to find out from George. Derek shows up this morning with plans for our dream house. And he didn't even think to mention it. Not that it would have made it okay. But I…it would have been better to hear it from him. That's…its like when Addison showed up. Telling me herself…_she_ told me they were married", Meredith said. "And he wonders why_ I_ have trouble trusting _him_."

"He said that?", Cristina asked.

"He told me I didn't trust anybody", Meredith said, pushing the hair out of her face.

"You trust me", Cristina told her. "If you didn't, you wouldn't be sitting here telling me any of this."

_I'm thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_The things that you've said_

_And I'm thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_Thinking over the things…_

"I was learning…learning to trust him. I feel like I was getting better. And then…he just…it's over", Meredith said, somewhat startled at her own revelation.

"It's not. Meredith, you know it's not. He can date the nurse. But, you know he loves you. If he didn't love you, he wouldn't have shown you house plans", Cristina reasoned. "He loves you, Meredith. And, for some reason, you love him too."

"I do love him", Meredith said as she began trembling, trying to take deep breaths. "I just…he has his future all planned out. _Our_ future. He even had kids' bedrooms he wanted to build. For our _kids_, Cristina", Meredith said as she put her face in her hands. "I didn't even think I wanted kids. Or to ever get married. But when I met him, I just…I did. I do. I want to be happy. I want it. The happy ending. I want it to be with him. Why…why isn't this easier? Why can't we just be happy?", Meredith said with a whisper, tears running freely down her face.

_He wants to marry me_

_Carry me far away_

_He wants to love me for life_

_He wants to be with me _

_E__very morning I awake_

_He wants to hold me through the night_

"I wish I had an answer to that", Cristina said softly. She had never seen Meredith more upset.

"And then, tonight. I was watching Bailey, just watching her look at her baby. And as I stood there, I realized I wanted that. I wanted to feel that love. That unconditional love you have for your child. I can't imagine that life without Derek in it. I don't know. I don't know what to think anymore", Meredith said, still crying.

"He wants that with you. Do you really think either of you would be happy with other people. Think about it, Mer. Do you really think Derek wants to move the nurse into the dream house? Or have kids with her? No. Yeah, the two of you have had your share of problems, which is probably an understatement. But, you've managed to find your way back to each other. Every time. I don't understand it. You don't understand it. It just…happens", Cristina told her. This was unlike Cristina's behavior. She was more insightful on their relationship than Meredith thought. It made sense though, considering Cristina had been there through it all.

_Father, which way should I go?_

_I cannot clearly see_

_Oh, I love him so_

_But only you know if he's the one for me_

"I just…I…was this my last chance? My last chance at the dream? I don't want to marry anybody else. I don't want get married yet, but when I do, I want it to be Derek. Is it?...am I too late?", Meredith asked her, beginning to sob again.

"No, you're not. It's not too late", Cristina said, pulling Meredith close to her, just letting her cry. At this moment, she didn't care if it constituted hugging. Meredith was her best friend. It was the only option.

Meredith just cried continuously for a while, Cristina sat there quietly, running her fingers through Meredith's hair. What else could she do? Finally, Meredith sat up, reaching for the box of tissues on her side table.

_Thinking over_

_The things that you've said_

_I'm thinking over_

_Thinking over_

_Only you know if he's the one for me_

"You have to talk to him", Cristina said simply.

"How? How do I just go and talk to him?", Meredith asked.

"If you talk, he'll listen" Cristina told her. "I want you to tell him everything you told me tonight. He feels the same way. You know he does, Meredith."

"I think he's dating Rose. That's her name…the nurse…Rose", Meredith said quietly.

"Let him date her. Maybe he needs to. If anything, it'll make him realize just how much he needs you. Be the bigger person. Wait for _him_. Prove to him that you're in this too. Even if he's not right now. Make him realize that you're making an effort. Because you love him. And that, even if you can't see it right now…one day, it'll be worth it. Worth the pain. Worth the anger. Worth the crying. It'll be worth it. Cause you'll have each other. That's what matters", Cristina said kindly.

Meredith just looked at her friend. The friend who usually just rolled her eyes when it came to the problems with her and Derek. "Thank you, Cristina", Meredith said softly.

"You're welcome…Look, I know I get annoyed with your love life or whatever. But you can talk to me. I'll help. If I can. I'll help", she told her.

"I know. And I appreciate it. I'm going to talk to him", Meredith said, taking a deep breath.

"Good. Go change your clothes. Then, let's get some sleep. You look like crap", Cristina said as she pulled the cover off of them so Meredith could go change.

_I can't really tell you_

_What I'm gonna do_

_There are so many thoughts in my head_

_There are two roads to walk down and one road to choose_

_So I'm thinking over_

_The things that you've said_

Meredith laughed at Cristina's comment. She was a good friend. And Meredith was thankful for it. Maybe Cristina was right. Maybe it would be okay. This was just another bump in the road. They would get past it. They were Meredith and Derek. They had their fair share of obstacles. But they always managed to make it through to the other side.

A few minutes later, Meredith got back into bed. Cristina pulled the blanket up over both of them.

"Goodnight, Cristina", Meredith said with a slight smile.

"Goodnight, Mer", Cristina yawned.

Meredith laid there in the dark, the coldness of her pillow cooling her hot cheek. She thought about the future. She and Derek would get married one day. They would build the house. Maybe not tomorrow. But they would. And they would build the bedrooms for the kids. Meredith smiled at this thought. Kids. They would come too. They both wanted to have them. Derek loved kids. They would be happy. One day. One day, it would all be okay.

There may be a hundred steps between where they were now and their dream house. They may not always be fun steps. Or sexy steps. But as long as they walked up them together, that was all that mattered. One day, they would both look back on all of their struggles and realize it was worth it. They we're in love. They had no choice. You only get one 'love of your life'. They weren't limitless. One. That's it. One.

If Meredith Grey knew nothing else, she knew Derek Shepherd was hers. He was her soul mate. He was the one. He always would be.

_Thinking over_

_Thinking over_

**I hope you liked it. After writing it, I feel a lot calmer. I was literally crying after the episode. For about an hour. But, like the voiceover said tonight, it's about having faith. And for some reason beyond my understanding, I do. I hope this made some people feel better too. :)**


	2. Realization

**Disclaimer: Not Mine. Like I said, if it belonged to me, 4.11 would have ended differently. **

**Here's the thing. I am ultimately on Team MerDer. I love**** them both with my entire being, both as a couple and as individuals.**** But, if it comes to choosing sides, I'm with Meredith. I love Derek. But, let's just say I hope Shonda puts him through hell when the show comes back on.**** He needs to feel remorse for his actions. That's just my opinion of course. ;)**

**A/N. This is about Derek after his date with Rose.**** Might he have a wakeup call? Maybe so.**

Derek drove up the dirt road. The road he had driven up many times before. The same road he and Meredith had driven up the first time he showed her the trailer. The night he told her to take things on faith. Faith. She had faith in him. She was learning to trust him. And then his wife showed up. The wife she knew nothing about. The wife he had tried to make it work with for months because he had to be that noble guy. Tonight, however… tonight, Derek Shepherd felt anything but noble. He felt confused. And hurt. And angry. But, most of all, Derek felt guilty. He betrayed her trust again. The trust Meredith had worked so hard to build up for him.

He parked his car and began to walk up toward the trailer. He heard Richard's door open. "It's late, Derek. Where have you been?", he asked in a concerned voice.

"I didn't realize I had a curfew, Chief", Derek said sarcastically as he walked over toward the Chief's trailer. He sat in a chair on the porch and ran his fingers through his hair.

Richard noticed that Derek looked troubled by something. "Are you okay?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. I'm fine. I'm just tired. I um…I went on a date tonight", Derek told him.

"With Grey? I thought I saw Grey leave with--"

"No. Not with Meredith. I took Rose, the scrub nurse…I went out to dinner with her", Derek said with a sigh.

"Oh. That's nice. How was it?", Richard asked him.

Derek shrugged. "It was good", he said unenthusiastically.

"Look, Shepherd. Are you going to tell me what's wrong or are you going to be vague a little longer?", Richard asked.

"It's, uh…it's been a tough day, Richard", Derek said, a sad look on his face.

"Well, what happened?", Richard asked, attempting to pry the problem out of him.

"This morning, I showed Meredith the plans I had drawn up for the house I want to build. Not for me. For her…for _us_", Derek told him.

"Oh", Richard said, still confused.

"They scared her", Derek said sadly, a pained look in his eyes. Deep down, he knew she had reasons to be scared. It all came down to trust. Taking things on faith. Meredith had been building up walls her whole life. To protect herself from the pain. Pain of people leaving her. Hurting her. Avoiding was her defense mechanism. She avoided to prevent the pain that, in her eyes, would inevitably come.

"That's a big step. Just…give her some time, Derek. Give her time to process it", Richard said kindly.

"That's the problem. How long am I supposed to wait?", Derek asked.

"Do you love her?", Richard asked, though he already knew the answer.

Derek nodded. "Yeah", Derek said, tears stinging his eyes.

"Well then, Derek, there's really no question here. You have to wait", Richard said sincerely.

"I just…I don't want to wait forever. What if, one day, I realize I've waited too long? And she…she's just never going to be ready", Derek asked.

"What if, one day, you regret _not_ waiting? And it's too late to do anything about it. Because you never gave it a chance?", Richard retorted.

Derek let out a frustrated sigh as a tear escaped his eye.

"Look, Derek. I've had some time to look back on my life. And I can't help but wish I'd done things differently", Richard confessed. "Life is hard. And confusing. We have to make decisions. And sometimes, those decisions hurt other people." He paused. "I loved Ellis. But I also loved my wife. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I'd left her. I feel like I cheated her out of the happiness she deserved. Maybe if we would have gotten divorced twenty years ago, she could have found someone else. She could have had children. She could have been happy. But…that's not what happened. I stayed with my wife. Because it was the noble thing to do. But, the more I think about it, the more I realize that there's more than one way to be a noble guy, Derek."

"I'm not noble, Richard", Derek said shaking his head.

"Derek, listen to me. There's always a million reasons why we do the things we do. Sometimes we do what we think is right. Other times, we just make mistakes. We're human…we're flawed."

"I just…I don't know what to do anymore", Derek said, leaning up in his chair.

"Take a step back. Try to get some perspective. You showed her house plans. And they scared her. I don't want to take sides in this, Derek. But you have to admit to yourself that her fears are justified. You betrayed her trust in you before…with Addison…"Richard said, being completely honest with him.

Derek let out a heavy sigh. He knew everything Richard was telling him was the truth.

"If I've learned _anything_ about relationships, it's this…don't take them for granted. If you're in love, you have to fight for it. Maybe if I had fought harder for my marriage, I would be at home with my wife now. Not here, living in a trailer…no offense. But, my point is, deciding whether it's worth the fight", Richard said.

"I know it's worth the fight. _She's_ worth the fight", Derek said softly before pausing. His mind flashed back to his conversation with Thatcher.

_She's tough, she tries to hide it. She's difficult but if you make an effort, she's worth it. She's worth the effort._

As he reflected on that conversation, Derek couldn't help but wonder what had happened? They were together then. They were happy. They slept in the same bed. He made coffee in the morning, had his own drawers for his clothes. They were a couple. The "leave your toothbrush over" kind of couple. How did they get from there to here?

Richard recalled what Meredith had told him yesterday. Meredith was _that person_ in Stan's wife's story. The one that gave her the worst news of her life. To her, that's who she would always be. Richard interrupted Derek's thoughts. "Meredith…she's been through a lot in life. People have hurt her…abandoned her…betrayed her. Don't be _that_ _person_, Derek. Don't be that person in her story…instead, be the one who stuck by her, and loved her, even when things were hard. Be the one who made her believe in love."

As Derek sat there processing what Richard had told him, realization finally came over him. He could no longer deny. He had to take some blame for the situation. He was the reason they got from there to here. At least partially. Meredith wasn't ready. And that wasn't solely her fault. He caused that. He's the reason she no longer believed in forever. In her story, _he's_ the person who ruined the fairy tale. With this thought, Derek's vision was blurred by tears. "I want her to believe in that, Richard. Knowing I'm the reason she doesn't…I can't…no, I won't be that person. I could never live with myself knowing I gave up on her."

"Then don't", Richard said simply. "Giving up…it doesn't take the pain away. It only causes more. Make it work, Derek. Talk to her. Tell her that you love her. And keep telling her. Even if she can't say it back, you should tell her. But most importantly, you have to_ wait_."

Derek looked up at him and gave him a faint smile. "I love her, Richard."

"I know", he said warmly.

"Thank you", Derek said as he stood up from his chair, running his fingers through his hair.

Richard just nodded with a smile. "You're welcome. Look, I love Meredith too. She's the closest thing I have to a daughter. I want to make sure she's happy, and cared for. Not that she can't take care of herself, but…I just…I don't want her to end up like me…I have an obligation to her, like a parent has for a child. All any parent wants in life is to see their child happy. And I know you're the one who can do that, Derek. So don't let me down. And more importantly, don't let her down."

Derek nodded. "I won't, Richard. I'm not letting her go again."

Both men said goodnight and Derek walked back to his trailer.

As he lay in bed that night, he couldn't help but wish Meredith was there, her warm body curled up next to his as he held her tightly. He wanted to do that every night for the rest of his life. He wanted her to know that he loved her, and nothing would ever change that.

When he rolled over, he noticed the extra set of blueprints sitting on the chair. He had left the other copy at Meredith's house, hoping that she might want to look at them again eventually. When he closed his eyes, he pictured the house. The house that overlooked Seattle. It was a big house, with lots of bedrooms. The master bedroom for him and Meredith. The others for their kids. The thought of kids brought a smile to Derek's face. Being a husband and father was his greatest dream. And he knew exactly the person he wanted it with. Meredith. There was no one else that could take her place. Derek couldn't imagine his future without Meredith Grey.

A touch of fear came over him. What if Meredith wouldn't take him back? What if she was done trying? What if she wouldn't listen to what he had to say? Sure, they weren't technically a "couple" when she found out about him and Rose. But, they both knew. They knew they were in love. And he betrayed that love. He hurt her…again. Meredith…she didn't do that to him. She was trying. Trying to make a future possible for them. But he failed to see it. He just hoped he wasn't too late. Derek wanted to be _the one_ in her story. The one that proved that true love does exist.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow, he would talk to her. He had to. Meredith Grey is the love of his life. He couldn't lose her. Not again.

**So, Derek Shepherd got his wakeup call. I hope you liked this chapter. This was originally a oneshot, but I decided to continue it because I need something to happen between them. So, this is my continuation of season 4 I guess. I really struggled with this update. I didn't want it to sound fake or cheesy. I tried to keep it realistic and true to character.**** I hope its okay.**

**Also, I watched Drowning on Dry Land and Some Kind of Miracle over the weekend. It actually made me feel better. ****It rekindled my belief that Derek loves Meredith more than anything else in the world. Seriously, watch those episodes. They'll help you. :)**

**I'll try to update as often as possible. Life is busy these days. **

** Reviews make me happy. :)**


	3. Redemption

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine. Sometimes I wish I lived in Shondaland. Maybe then things would make more sense to me.**

**I'm not going to bash Rose in this. I don't like her, but she's not evil. I'm going to attempt to redeem her. Derek too. ****Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them.**

Derek woke up the next morning feeling nervous. There was a huge knot in his stomach. A lot had happened last night. He knew he had hurt her. Again. But today, he would talk to her. He knew he had to fix things. Their relationship had survived far too much to give up now.

As Derek got ready for work, he felt a sense of loneliness wash over him. Meredith should be there too. With him. He wondered if they would already have the house by now if nothing had happened. No secret wives. No drowning. No almost-weddings. If they were happy from the start. Maybe they would have the house, maybe they wouldn't. It didn't matter. Because they would be together. That was the important thing.

He stepped out of the trailer and headed toward his car. It was a brisk, sunny day. Derek took that as a good sign. Today wouldn't be easy, and he looked for any trace of optimism he could find.

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"Mer", Cristina said as she nudged the sleeping form next to her. Meredith didn't move. "Mer", she repeated in a louder voice.

"Ugh, what?", Meredith grumbled, keeping her eyes closed.

"It's time to wake up. We have to be at work in an hour", Cristina told her.

Meredith sat up in bed with a sigh, pushing the hair out of her face. The details of last night flooded her mind. She suddenly felt nauseous. "Oh God", she groaned.

Cristina knew this day wasn't exactly going to be a walk in the park for her friend. "Mer, don't back down. Just talk to him, okay", Cristina said as she brushed her teeth.

"Yeah. I know", Meredith nodded as she got out of bed. "I have to", she told herself.

Meredith knew it would be difficult. She knew there was a good chance that tears would be shed and hurt feelings would be expressed. But, she was beginning to realize that maybe the pain was necessary to heal. She just hoped they could heal together.

The drive to work seemed quicker than usual, perhaps because Meredith had been trying to come up with a speech for Derek. However, after some consideration, she decided to just let herself talk. Whatever came out, so be it. There would be no hand gestures. No begging. No pick me, choose me, love me. She would just talk, get it all out. And, in her efforts to be the better person, she even vowed to let him talk. Give him a chance to explain himself.

_I can do this_, she kept telling herself. _I can do this._

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When Derek found out that Cristina would be the resident assisting him today, he was less than enthusiastic. He was sure Meredith had told her what had happened. The words _"__She's my best friend…__She was there when you weren't"_ rang through Derek's mind. It was true. Cristina was Meredith's go-to person. He assumed she had a lecture ready for him.

"Good morning, Dr. Yang", Derek said with a small smile.

"Look, before you even start grilling me for information, I'm not involved. Well, I guess I am. But don't talk to _me_. Find _her_ and talk to _her_. And _let_ her talk", she told him firmly.

Derek simply nodded. "I uh…I will…well, I am. I just, I haven't seen her yet today", he stammered.

"Whatever. Like I said, I'm not involved", she said as she took the chart and walked toward the patient's room, Derek following behind her.

He felt somewhat relieved. At least Meredith was willing to talk. There was so much he wanted to say to her. He wanted to apologize. No excuses. No more playing the martyr card. He had to own up to his actions. And he would. For the sake of their relationship. Their future. He had to.

When the two were finished rounding on their patient, Derek headed back to the nurses' station to take some notes on his upcoming surgery.

"Good morning, Dr. Shepherd", Rose said, appearing from around the corner.

Derek put on a fake smile. He didn't want to be rude. Rose was a nice person, but he knew nothing would ever come of the relationship. Meredith was his only chance at happiness. And he learned from past experience that giving someone false hope was wrong. He wasn't going to make that mistake again. "Hi Rose", he said in the happiest tone he could manage.

"So, are you okay? You seemed a little off at dinner last night", she said sympathetically.

Derek sighed, giving her a weak smile. "I just…do you have some free time after surgery? I, um…I think we have to talk."

"Sure", Rose said with a gracious smile. She had a feeling this was coming eventually. She just didn't expect it to happen so soon. It's not like they were in an official relationship anyway. Even still, she wasn't going to be that person. The one to break up a relationship. Especially between Meredith and Derek, the stars of the Seattle Grace soap opera. She would let it go.

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Meredith was working in the clinic for Bailey, who had taken the day off to be with her son.

"Hey", Mark said with a grin as he walked over to Meredith, who was filling out charts.

"Hey", Meredith said, keeping her eyes on her work. "What are you doing here?"

"Bailey told me to come find you to see if you needed help over here. But, seeing as it's deserted, I guess you've got things under control", he joked.

Meredith just gave him a weak smile.

"What's up?", Mark asked, a touch of concern in his voice.

"I'm fine", Meredith said with a shrug as she put her charts back. "Okay. I swore to myself I wasn't going to do that anymore", she sighed.

"Do what?"

"Say I'm fine when I'm not", Meredith told him.

"You're not fine", Mark assumed.

"No", Meredith said shaking her head. "I'm not."

"Oh. It's a Derek thing", Mark said with a nod. "It's always a Derek thing."

Meredith sighed. _He's here. You've got some free time. Talk to him. This was evolving, right?_, she asked herself. "Yeah. It is…a Derek thing."

"You found out about him and Rose?", Mark said as he hopped into one of the chairs.

"You knew?"

"He told me about it yesterday. For the record, I told him to tell you. But he said it was nothing. Just one kiss", Mark said as he studied her face.

"When was this?", Meredith asked curiously.

"Yesterday morning. Before work, he took me out to see the land he wants to build the house on. It's some of the nicest land in Seattle. Did he show you the blueprints?", Mark asked her.

"Wait, he showed you the land?", she asked again.

"Yeah. He had me trailing through mud for a mile. He was so excited about it. I can't remember the last time I've seen him so happy", Mark told her.

"Oh", Meredith said softly.

"What?", he asked her.

"It's just that…I thought the only reason he had plans drawn up was to pressure me. Call my bluff. Because I'm a commitment-phobe", she explained as she rolled her pen between her hands.

"He didn't seem to have an ulterior motive when he was practically prancing around in the damn woods. I ruined my good shoes, all because he just had to show someone where he wanted to build the house. Then again, I could be wrong. But the only way to find out is to ask him", Mark said, rolling his eyes at the memory of Derek, looking like a little kid in a candy store.

Meredith just sat there, attempting to fight back the tears welling in her eyes.

"What?", Mark asked sympathetically.

"I just…I have to…", Meredith said, her voice trailing off.

Mark leaned up in his chair. "Look, if you want my advice…well, even if you don't, I'm giving it to you anyway. You two have to talk more."

"We talk", Meredith said, knowing it was a lie.

"Yelling isn't talking. Scheduling sex isn't talking", Mark told her straight out.

"I was going to talk to him today. I just haven't seen him yet", she confessed.

"Well, good", Mark said with a nod. "That's a start."

"Yeah", she said softly before pausing. "I have to stop avoiding", she said, as though astonished by her own thoughts.

"Yep. That would probably be helpful", Mark said with a nod.

"Like, right now? I should be looking for him. Not cowering behind the nurses' station in the clinic", she sighed.

"He's in surgery. You can cower for at least another two hours", Mark said, trying to lighten her mood. "But, after that, I want your ass over in that hospital", he ordered in a big brother tone.

"I know", she told him. "I will."

"Promise?", Mark asked.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yes. I promise."

"Okay. Good. So, I have a rhinoplasty in a half hour. You want to scrub in? Or do you want to wallow a little more?", he joked.

"You'd seriously let me scrub in?", she asked, her mood improving.

"I figured you could use a surgery", he said with a smile.

"Crap. Bailey asked me to watch the clinic though. I can't leave", Meredith told him.

"O'Malley can do it", Mark told her. "Bailey trusts him."

"Okay", Meredith said with a smile as she paged George to the clinic.

After he arrived, the two walked back to the hospital together. "So, can I ask why your willingly getting yourself involved in my problems?", she asked, a touch of humor in her voice.

Mark shrugged. "It's part of my job as your fellow dirty mistress. And, I already ruined one of Derek's relationships. I figured I could make it up to the universe by trying to save one this time. A little good karma can't hurt."

Meredith just looked at him. She had never seen this side of Mark before. The caring, compassionate Mark. She was glad that he was there to support her. "Thanks, Mark", she said with a smile.

"You're welcome…just remember that I can guilt you with this when I need a favor", he grinned.

"I knew there was a catch", she laughed. "Even still, I appreciate it."

"I know", he said assuringly as the two went to scrub in.

After her talk with Mark, Meredith felt a little better. He had built her confidence back up after it had started to fade. At least she was in the hospital now. Not hiding in the clinic. _Progress_, she thought to herself.

Progress.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

After the surgery, Derek and Cristina were washing their hands in the scrub room. Cristina nodded her head toward Rose, who was still in the OR.

"I know", Derek said softly.

"Did you talk to her?", she asked in a whisper.

"I thought you weren't involved", Derek said sarcastically.

"I'm not", Cristina said as she dried her hands and left the scrub room.

Derek just shook his head and chuckled slightly as he leaned against the sink, waiting for Rose so the two could talk.

"Hey", Rose said as she entered the scrub room.

"Hi", Derek said with a small smile.

"So…", Rose said, attempting to begin the conversation.

Derek laughed softly, "Okay, so…I um", he stammered, trying to find the right words.

"Dr. Shep…Derek", she said, slightly amused. "It's okay. Really it is. You don't have to apologize for anything. It was one kiss. One kiss and one dinner. I'm not going to hold it against you."

"Oh…", Derek said, slightly startled.

"Like I said, everybody knows about you and Meredith Grey. And I don't want to cause any problems between the two of you", she said with a small smile.

"Oh, um…well, thank you", Derek said, not knowing what else to say.

Rose just smiled and gave him a nod. "Just friends."

"Just friends", Derek agreed.

As Rose started to make her way to the door, she turned around and looked at him. "And as a friend, I'm going to give you some advice."

"Okay", Derek said, folding his arms across his chest.

"You're one of the good ones…I haven't known you that long, and I know that. And I'm guessing Meredith knows it too. So what I'm saying is…don't ruin that for her", she said before pausing. "Good night, Dr. Shepherd", she said with a smile before exiting the scrub room.

Derek let out a heavy sigh and rubbed his face. He left the room and went over to the OR board to find that Meredith would be finishing her surgery with Mark soon. Derek's shift was over, so he decided to get changed. He needed something to distract him. To take his mind off the fact that, in an hour, his life would be forever changed. There would be a definite answer. He could only hope it was the answer needed to hear.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

As Derek was leaving the locker room, he noticed Meredith heading for the resident lounge.

He took a deep breath and swallowed hard. _Now_, he told himself.

"Meredith", he managed to say, his strangled voice sounded pained.

Meredith froze in place and closed her eyes. A chill went down her spine. Part of her wanted to sprint down the hallway. But something inside of her prevented her legs from moving. She knew avoiding was no longer an option. She had to do this.

It took all the strength she could muster, but Meredith finally managed to turn on her heel and face him. She couldn't say anything, for fear that if she were to talk, the tears would come instantly. Instead, she just bit her bottom lip and looked at him, the pain evident in his deep blue eyes.

"Can we talk?", he asked softly.

Meredith simply nodded. "Give me a minute to get changed", she said with great difficulty.

"Okay", he said with a weak smile.

Meredith quickly entered the lounge and shut the door, leaning against it.

_Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out_, she told herself. She knew this had to happen today. But that didn't make it any easier.

She got changed and emerged several minutes later. "I, um…there's not much privacy here. Did you want to come over?", Meredith asked softly.

"Yeah. Okay", Derek told her with a nod.

The two walked out of the hospital together. Not holding hands. Not speaking. Just…together.

Derek followed Meredith to her house. This gave them both some time to think. To gather their thoughts.

The two entered the house together. Meredith took off her coat and hung it on the rack, Derek following her example. Meredith knew that her roommates were going to Joe's before coming home, so they still had some time to themselves.

"Do you want to go into the living room?", Meredith asked softly.

Derek nodded and they walked in, taking their seats next to each other on the couch.

There was an awkward silence for several moments, neither knowing what to say to begin the conversation.

As soon as Derek was going to start, Meredith suddenly began speaking.

"You hurt me", she said straight out, looking into his eyes. "You hurt me a lot, actually. I was in love with you…I trusted you…and then Addison shows up. But that…that's not why I'm upset. I'm understand why you did the things you did. It's what you've done to me since then. Walking away, stringing me along, making me think I had a chance", she said, her breathing becoming heavy, angry tears filling her eyes.

"Telling me you met a woman at a bar. And an hour later, telling me I'm love of your life. That kind of thing? It messes with my head. I just…I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know how to trust you. And I_ want _to trust you, Derek. I do. I did. And you keep taking that away", she said, her bright green eyes passionate and pained. "You tell me you want to marry me. And have kids and build a house…I want all of that too. But you're making it harder and harder for me to believe it can ever happen. Because you tell me you'll wait, and before you can turn the page on the damn calendar, you're just done. You're done waiting. And you wonder why I can't trust you. If I really am the love of your life, Derek…you'd wait. You would wait. Because that's what you're supposed to do. Because believe it or not, Derek…I love you too", she said loudly, her shoulders beginning to shake. She struggled to take in a few deep breaths before she lost all control. The dam burst and streams of tears poured out of her eyes and down her face.

Derek just sat there in shock, not knowing what to do. Instinct told him to put his arms around her and hold her, so he did. And to his surprise, Meredith didn't pull away. She just continued to cry hysterically, releasing all of her pain and frustration. Derek felt her hot tears seep through his shirt. He just pulled her closer and stroked her hair with his fingers, attempting to soothe her.

After several minutes, Meredith's breathing steadied. And despite her better judgment, she let Derek hold her and she relaxed in his arms. She finally sat up straight and reached for the tissue box, wiping her eyes and face. She noticed that Derek's light blue shirt was now stained dark with her tears, but he didn't seem to mind.

"Go ahead", she croaked out.

"Hmm?", Derek asked, still slightly shaken up by what had happened.

"It's your turn. I told myself I would give you a chance to talk. So…it's your turn", she said softly.

"I'm sorry", he said, his voice barely audible. "I'm sorry for…everything. I don't even know where to start. I know that I hurt you. And I hate that I did that. I was fooling myself to think I could ever move on…be happy with someone else", he said softly, his eyes filling with tears. "Because I know that no matter what, it's you. It will always been you. I wouldn't even consider getting married again unless I knew for a fact you're the one I'd be marrying. I wouldn't want to build a house for anyone else but you…for us. And I'd only want kids if they called you their mother", he paused and studied Meredith's eyes, which were once again filled with tears.

"When I picture my life in ten years, I see you. You're the only one that will ever give me a chance at a happy future. And I know…I know I don't deserve it. I'm not going to act like I deserve forgiveness, because I know I don't. But I just want you to know that I love you. And that no matter what you decide, you're the one that saved me. And for that, Meredith, you will _always_ be the love of my life", he said as tears ran down his tired, stubbled face.

Meredith bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling. Blue met green as the two stared into each other's tearful eyes, neither knowing what to say.

"And I'm sorry about the house plans. I knew you weren't ready. I just…I had to know that there was a chance for us. A chance that maybe one day, we could be happy. I wasn't calling your bluff, I swear. I just…I was angry, and…I'm sorry, Derek said genuinely, looking deep into her eyes.

"I know", Meredith said in a whisper. "Mark…he told me how excited you were about it. He said you were so happy."

"He did?", Derek asked.

Meredith nodded. "It's not that I don't like the house. Or even the idea of the house. I do. I love it. I just…I'm not ready. And I know that—", she said before Derek cut her off.

"I know. It's okay", Derek said softly. "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking about your feelings. Or my part in why you're not ready. I know it's my fault", he croaked. "And if I could take it back, I would. But I know I can't…that's why I'll understand if you decide to move on with someone else. I'll support you in whatever decision you make", he said honestly.

"Derek", Meredith said, surprised by his gesture. "There is no one else. I stopped considering the possibility that there was someone else a long time ago. Because I know that you're the one. You're the one that I'm supposed to be with. I never questioned that. And I never will. Okay?", she asked in a kind yet firm voice.

"Thank you", Derek said, relieved that she had just given him the answer to his question. The answer he wanted to hear. "I love you so much."

"I love you too", Meredith said before he pulled her close him and kissed her passionately, tears streaming down both of their faces. When they pulled away for breath, Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. She suddenly felt so calm, so safe in Derek's arms. The way it was always supposed to be.

"What now?", Meredith asked as he gently rubbed her back.

"Now…now we just try to make it through. Together. We can help each other. No dating other people. No S&M. We can…well, we can be a couple. The kind of couple that goes out to dinner, and watches movies on the couch, and hold hands. All of the things that couples do. And along the way, we'll get ready. And one day, we will be. I want to be that person in your story, Meredith. The one that makes you believe in the fairy tale. I'm determined to be that person. So, we just take it slow…day by day. How does that sound?", Derek asked, hoping his suggestion wouldn't make her panic, or crawl back into her shell.

"Good", she said simply. "Together."

"Together", Derek whispered into her hair.

After several minutes of silence, Derek heard soft snores and realized Meredith had fallen asleep in his arms. He chuckled softly before kissing her cheek.

Derek gently lifted her into his arms and carried her upstairs to her room. He laid her on the bed on top of the covers and removed her shoes. He gently pulled off her jeans and sweater before slipping her into a pair of pajama pants and her Dartmouth T shirt. He pulled down the blanket and put her under it. When he made sure she was comfy and content, he leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. "Good night, Meredith. I love you", he whispered.

As he went to leave the room, he heard Meredith roll over. "Stay", she said sleepily.

"It's okay. I don't have to", he said with a small smile.

"Together, remember?", she reminded him.

"Okay", Derek said softly before removing his shoes and joining her in bed, pulling the blanket over both of them.

Meredith curled up next to him and sighed. Derek wrapped his arm around her and kissed her on the cheek once again. It felt so right. So perfect. Just holding Meredith in his arms. He wanted to do it every night for the rest of their lives.

"I love you", she said softly as she took his hand and laced her fingers with his.

"I love you too", he whispered as he drifted off to sleep, a small smile on his face.

Maybe the Meredith and Derek soap opera would turn into a fairy tale after all. It may not be perfect, but maybe that was okay. Because they would be together.

The way it was always meant to be.

**See? I fixed it. I just hope Shonda can fix it too.**

**Reviews make me ****happy. :)**


	4. Talk

**Disclaimer: I am not Shonda Rhimes****, nor do I own Grey's Anatomy. I'm just a girl who loves Meredith and Derek, and wants to fix things for the sake of her own sanity.**

Meredith slowly opened her puffy, red eyes the next morning, awoken by the raindrops that were pounding against the windows. On a day like today, she was thankful to have off from work. Meredith felt an arm draped over her waist as she lay on her side. She was completely still for a few moments, trying to fathom all that had occurred last night. It still didn't feel real. She yelled, and cried, and got it all out. All of the anger, the pain, the frustration that had been pent up for so long.

And Derek apologized, and cried, and held her. Feeling the soft flannel covering her legs, she remembered that he had changed her clothes after carrying her up the stairs to her bedroom. Their talked had completely drained her, both emotionally and physically.

Finally, Meredith turned around to face him, his arm still protectively wrapped around her. Much to her surprise, he was still sleeping. She studied his face. The faint crow's feet on the corners of his eyes, the stubble on his cheeks, the dark curls hanging over his forehead. This face was the first thing she saw when she used to wake up in the morning. In the early days of their relationship when they were so blissed out and exhausted from all the sex. The face she longed to see when she woke up after her one night stands. Then when they got back together after his divorce, when they were too tired to have sex, so they just slept, it was the same face.

No matter what the circumstances were, it was always the face she wanted to see when she woke up. It was the face of the man she loved. The face that made her world stop and her life better.

"Mmm", he grumbled as his eyes fluttered open. When he saw her green eyes staring back at him, he couldn't help but smile at her. "Good morning", he said softly.

She smiled back as him. "Morning."

"Were you watching me sleep?", he asked, a slightly playful tone in his voice.

"Yeah. I guess I was", she confessed. "I was just thinking."

"About what?", he asked as he gently rubbed her back, causing her to relax completely into his arms.

"Life. Us…", she told him as she pressed her body closer to his and breathed in his scent. The smell that was uniquely his. She knew he didn't wear cologne, so she assumed it was his deodorant, or his soap, or perhaps his detergent. Maybe a mix of all three. Whatever it was, that scent always comforted her.

His face. His smell. Both were things she never wanted to live without. And until recently, Meredith had to consider the possibility that maybe she would have to. Several minutes of comfortable silence passed as they listened to the heavy rainfall coming from outside.

"Did you want to talk?", Derek asked her softly, a hopeful expression evident in his eyes.

In her ongoing effort to evolve, not only for the sake of their future, but for herself too, Meredith nodded slightly. "Yeah." The more she thought about it, the more she realized that talking was actually helpful. Sure, it was easier to avoid, but that didn't make the problem go away. It just delayed the inevitable. A lot was said last night, but there was so much more she wanted to say. She knew the conversation was far from over.

"Okay", he said, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead before breathing in the scent of her hair. The scent that identified her. It was a part of Meredith. "I missed this", he confessed, his voice somewhat muffled as he spoke into her soft hair.

"Hmm?", she asked, unsure of what he was referring to. There were so many possibilities.

"The smell. Your hair", he said as he studied her eyes. "When I went back to…I needed something to hold onto. So I took your pillow, and gave Addison mine. I just…I needed…that pillow helped me", he said in a whisper, tears welling in his eyes. "But eventually, the flowery smell faded."

Meredith took his hand and gently squeezed it. For all those months, she suffered. She knew he was in pain too. But she hadn't realized the intensity. Just because someone slept in your bed at night doesn't mean you don't feel lonely. "Lavender", she said softly.

Derek couldn't help but smile. "I know."

As they looked into each other's eyes, they both knew what the other was thinking about. For them, that conversation gave them renewed hope. Faint hope, but hope nonetheless.

_It was a Thursday morning. You were wearing that ratty little Dartmouth t-shirt you look so good in. The one with the__ hole in the back of the neck. __You'd just washed your hair and you smelled like some kind of flower. I was running late for surgery. You said you were gonna see me later and you leaned to me, you put your hand on my chest and you kissed me. Soft. Was quick, kinda like a habit. You know, like we'd do it every day for the rest of our lives. You went back to reading the newspaper and I went to work. That was the last time we kissed._

_Lavender. My hair smelled like lavender from my conditioner._

"I'm so sorry", Derek said as he started to cry, his voice barely audible.

"I know", she said as she wrapped her arm around him for once. "I know. I'm sorry too."

"For what?", he asked her. "You didn't hurt me like I hurt you."

"It takes two, Derek. Both of us are responsible for letting things get so bad. We…I just wish we would have done things differently. Like…talk. Like we are now. Maybe none of this would have happened if we would have just _talked_."

Derek pulled her closer, so they were both hugging each other under the covers. "We have to talk more."

"I know. I will", she promised him.

"Me too", he said with a nod.

"Do you think we'll be okay?", she asked him honestly. "Do you really think it'll all be okay?"

"I do", he said as he wiped the tears from under her eyes with his thumb. "Do you?"

"I want to. I'm starting to", she confessed.

"I'm sorry you ever stopping believing in the first place", he said softly.

"A lot happened, Derek. A lot happened in a short amount of time. My mom dying, and then Susan, and then all the crap with my dad… drowning…things just started spiraling out control and…I just…I know that when I drowned, it was scary…horrible for you", Meredith said as tears built up in her eyes again.

"I should have said something. I shouldn't have waited all that time…and I shouldn't have said what I said…about not wanting to breathe for you. I know that hurt you. I wanted to say something for so long, and it just came out", he said before pausing and shaking his head. "I feel like even more of an ass because I let us have sex first. I felt so guilty about that afterward. I know you were just trying to help me. And I hurt you…again", he said sadly.

Meredith just sighed as she rubbed his back. She couldn't tell him it didn't hurt her, because it did. "I shouldn't have left that night. Even yelling at each other would have been better than leaving", she said.

"I understand why you left. Hell, if I was you, I would have slapped me across the face", Derek said with a sigh.

"Derek", Meredith said softly as she placed her other hand on his face. His sudden vulnerability was so new to her. Derek was always the protector, the one who pulled her out of the bathtub, out of the water. Her knight in shining whatever. He never broke down in front of her. "It's okay…you never have to put on a façade in front of me. You always…just, it's okay to be vulnerable with me. I want us to be able to get angry, and yell, and cry, and stick around long enough to get past it…we have to do that, otherwise…"

He just nodded at her and pulled her closer to his body.

"And Derek…", she whispered.

"Yeah?", he said, peering into her eyes once again.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm in this, okay? I've been in this since day one, without even knowing it. The second you walked over to me at the bar, I was in it. And I know it's crazy and this sort of thing never happens. Maybe that's why I trust it. Because I know that if something like this happens, it was meant to be. So… even when I want to kill you, I'm not going anywhere", she said with a small smile, several tears escaping her eyes.

"Me either. I swear", he promised has he pressed his cheek against her forehead. After a few blissful moments of quiet, Derek spoke. "We met in a bar", he said, a hint of astonishment is his own voice, as if he just discovered something.

"Yeah…?", Meredith said, wondering where exactly he was going with this.

"I just…we met in a bar, you threw me out after a one night stand, and an hour later we find each other again. That's got to mean something, right?", he said with a slight laugh.

"Yeah. I think so", she said with a nod. "I think it means we have to stop fighting fate…if it's supposed to happen, it will."

"Meredith", he said softly, causing goose bumps to erupt all over her body. Nobody else in the world could say her name like Derek could. Every time he said it, she got butterflies in her stomach. And she never wanted that feeling to go away.

"Hmm?", she asked, tilting her chin up to look at him.

"It's supposed to happen", he said in a whisper, as if revealing a secret to her.

Her eyes blurred with tears, turning them a brighter shade of green. "I know", she said with a small nod.

Derek just smiled before capturing her lips with his own, pulling her on top of him. She moaned in pleasure as he brushed his tongue across her lips. She opened her mouth to him and their tongues clashed. They kissed passionately for what seemed like an eternity before Meredith finally pulled back for air.

"We're not done talking, but thank you. I needed that", she said breathily.

"Me too", he said with a smile.

Meredith rolled off of him and they propped themselves against the headboard.

"So…I think we should make some rules", Meredith told him with a nod.

"Okay", Derek agreed. "Like what?"

"I don't know. I just think there should be rules", she admitted with a small smile.

"I have one", he said. "Sleepovers are a requirement."

"That was a rule before" she reminded him. "You said you'd always show up and you didn't", she said sadly. She wasn't using it against him or trying to make him feel bad, she was just stating the fact.

"I know", he nodded understandingly. "I need you to trust me on this one. And I know that I've told you that before, and I let you down. But…you just…please trust me on this."

"Okay", she said with a small nod. "I will. And I have another rule. About sex."

"What's that?", he asked in a cautious tone.

"We won't be having any", she stated.

"You mean with other people?", he asked curiously.

"Obviously not with other people, Derek. But I mean with each other. You and I will not be having sex. Well, not for a while anyway. Clearly I can't hold out forever. And neither can you. But…I just…I think if we can go a while without it, it'll help…prove that we can have an actual relationship. A healthy relationship", she said with a shrug.

"In other words, when we sleep together, we'll actually be sleeping. Together", he said, trying to clarify what she meant.

"Exactly", she told him with a nod.

"Okay", he said with a smile. "I can do that."

Meredith looked at him incredulously. "Seriously?", she asked in disbelief, thinking for sure he'd some sort of rebuttal.

"Yeah. As long as you're with me in the bed, I don't care what we're doing in it", he said honestly.

She just looked at him, a little surprised by his statement. "Thank you", she said with a warm smile, resting her face on his shoulder.

He answered by kissing her forehead. "You're welcome….I'm willing to do whatever it takes, Meredith. And I know I have a lot of ground to make up for…but I promise to do everything to make this right again", he said softly. Meredith could tell by his tone of voice that he was being sincere.

"I know. Me too", she said as she took his hand and laced their fingers together.

"Thank you. Thank you for letting me in…for loving me enough not give up on us", he said, peering into her eyes, noticing that even without makeup on, her long eyelashes were always curled.

"If I would have given up on you, I would have been giving up on me too. I wasn't going to let that happen", she said with a small smile.

"I love you, Meredith", he said as he wrapped his arm her tiny frame and pulled her up against his body.

There they were again. The goose bumps. The butterflies. All because of his voice. And his arm that captured her into his tight embrace. The arms of the man who loved her more than she would ever know. "I love you too", she said softly.

"How about we make that rule number three", he said, gently squeezing her hand.

"What?", she asked,

"Saying "I love you"". Every morning, every night. Whenever. Just saying it. I think that might help too", he said kindly.

Meredith nodded. "Okay", she said before kissing him softly.

As they sat in silence, Meredith stared at their hands, their intertwined fingers. The only two pieces of the puzzle in the world that fit together perfectly. The hand of her soul mate. The hand of the man who had changed her life without ever trying to. He just did. Meredith couldn't explain it.

And that's why she trusted it.

**I hope you liked this chapter**** and**** you don't think it's too fluffy. I tried to make it true to character. Reviews make me happy. Comments, suggestions, anything. Thanks. :)**

**Read. Love. Live. Review.**


	5. Commitment

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't be writing a disclaimer. ;)**

A week had passed since Meredith and Derek had become a couple. Again. They were even following all the rules. There had been no sex, but sleepovers every night. They had even been saying I love you. Things seemed to be looking up. They were now one of _those couples_ that both had always envied.

"Morning", Derek said with a smile before kissing her softly.

"Morning", she said back as she crawled out of bed and trudged into the bathroom.

Derek noticed she wasn't in the best of moods, but he decided to give her some space. Maybe she was just tired. Now wasn't the time to press the issue, considering they were already running late for work.

"Hey", Cristina said as Meredith entered the residents' lounge.

"Hey", Meredith sighed, quickly changing into her scrubs.

"You okay?", Alex asked her.

"Oh. Yeah. I'm just tired", Meredith told them.

"Trouble in paradise?", Cristina joked.

Meredith just looked at her and smirked. "No…well, yes. I just feel like I'm being a burden. I told Derek he could go to Joe's with Mark, but he insisted that we just go home together. I want him to be able to get some space, you know? I don't want him to think we have to spend every minute together. Plus, I'm crampy and bloated and Izzie used the last tampon", she blurted out.

"Well, why don't you just tell him that? Maybe not that last part, but still. Isn't that part of your whole 'rules' thing?", Cristina asked her.

"Yeah. It is. You're right. I'll talk to him", Meredith agreed as the three of them left to do their rounds.

"I hate my interns", Cristina said plainly.

"Lexie's nice", Meredith said with a shrug.

Cristina and Alex just looked at her incredulously.

"What?", she asked them.

"I thought you were an only child", Cristina said sarcastically.

"I am. But that doesn't mean she isn't nice", Meredith explained.

After Meredith rounded on her patients, she noticed Derek filling out charts at the nurses' station. "Hey", she said with a small smile.

"Hey", Derek said cheerfully, thankful that she seemed to be in a better mood than this morning. "Get anything good?"

Meredith shrugged. "Valve replacement. How about you?"

"I have a DBS at ten, so I was thinking we could—", he said before Meredith cut him off, her face now pale.

"Hold that thought", she said, clutching her stomach and running away.

"Mer!", he shouted. He considered running after her but figured she was headed for the bathroom.

"What's wrong with her?", Mark asked as he passed Meredith running down the hallway.

"I don't know. I think she has a stomach ache", Derek said, a look of concern on his face.

"You didn't get her pregnant, did you?", Mark joked. "You thought you did before."

All of the color drained from Derek's face as he comprehended what Mark told him. "No…I don't think…wait…no. No", Derek assured himself.

"Mhm", Mark said, not believing him.

"She's not. We're always careful", Derek told him.

Mark closed his chart and looked at his friend. "Derek…", he said with raised brows.

Before Derek could make further conversation, his pager went off. "Damn. 911. If you see her, can you tell her to come find me?"

"Yeah", Mark said with a nod.

As Derek rushed down to the pit, a million thoughts ran through his mind. _What __if she really is__ pregnant? Does she even know? __ Why wouldn't she tell me? How do I ask her without sounding like an as__s? This could be bad. Really bad. Crap._

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As Meredith emerged from the bathroom after throwing up, she walked over to the vending machines to get herself a bottle of water. "Why are you all sitting here?", she asked her interns as they sat on the gurneys in the hallway playing a card game. It seemed as though George was the only one of her interns that was actually working at the moment.

One of them shrugged. "We don't have anything to do."

"How about the pile of post-op notes waiting at the nurses' station? Either that or go down to the pit", she told them, putting on her best mean face. They did as they were told and Meredith picked up her water from the vending machine.

Meredith and Cristina met up to go to the cafeteria together for lunch. "You think your interns are bad? Mine were just having a social hour on the gurneys playing Go Fish", she told her.

"We used to do that", Cristina reminded her.

"Yeah, but…okay, I guess I can't defend myself", Meredith sighed. "Remind me to apologize to Bailey for that."

"Get anything good with Hahn?", Cristina asked.

"Valve replacement. What about you?"

"Hip replacement. I seriously hate ortho", Cristina groaned as the two dropped into their seats at the table.

"Has Callie mentioned anything about Izzie and George?", Meredith asked her.

"No. Not yet, anyway. It's bad enough I'm on ortho. If she starts bitching about her love life, I think I might have to hit her", Cristina said as she bit into her salad. "Hey. Why aren't you eating?"

"I have chocolate", Meredith told her.

"A candy bar isn't lunch, Meredith", Cristina informed her somewhat sarcastically.

"Don't mess with me today. I feel like crap", Meredith warned, pointing her candy bar at her.

"Hey", Alex said as he dropped his tray and took a seat. "Are you okay?", he asked as he looked Meredith up and down.

"Woman troubles, remember?", she said with a fake grin.

"Right", Alex said with a nod. "Sorry."

"Where are Izzie and George?", Meredith asked.

"Probably hiding from Torres", Alex joked.

"Alex", Meredith said, looking at him.

"He's probably right", Cristina reasoned.

"Hey", George said with a smile as he sat down to join them.

"Hey", Meredith said. "Where's Izzie?"

"She got pulled into emergency surgery with Shepherd", George told them.

The rest of their lunch time was spent in an awkward silence. Meredith was the only one who attempted to make conversation. She hated all of the tension between her friends. She was thankful when Dr. Hahn paged her to prep their patient for surgery. "I have to go", she said quickly before removing herself from the table.

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After Derek scrubbed out of surgery, he noticed Tucker walking down the hallway.

"Tucker", Derek called, trying to get his attention.

"Oh. Dr. Shepherd, hello", Tucker said kindly.

"How's the baby?", Derek asked him.

"He's doing well. We'll be able to take him home in a few days", Tucker said with a small smile.

"That's good", Derek said with a happy nod. "So…you'll both be…", Derek asked. "I don't mean to sound intrusive. I was just wondering how she was holding up."

Tucker sat down in one of the waiting area chairs. Derek took a seat next to him.

"I just…that day…I was so angry. I thought I might…we might lose our son", Tucker said, his eyes filling with tears. "I was so scared. I know that what happened was nobody's fault. I guess I just had to blame someone. Blaming Miranda was easier than blaming myself. I shouldn't have accused her. I apologized…for everything. When I married her, I knew it wouldn't be easy. This job…I don't know how you all do it. But, we're going to make this work. They're my family. I need them…I need them in my life. I love them too much to give up", Tucker explained softly.

"Yeah", Derek said with a nod. "Giving up on someone you love is never the way to go."

"Exactly", Tucker agreed. "Well, I should be getting back to them. I promised we'd say goodnight together."

"Okay", Derek smiled. "Congratulations again. For everything."

"Thanks, Dr. Shepherd", Tucker said with a nod.

"Goodnight", Derek said warmly.

"Hey. Did you talk to her yet?", Mark asked as he came up behind him.

"No. I haven't seen her all day. Our shifts are almost over. I'll talk to her when we get home", Derek told him.

"What if she is…pregnant?", Mark asked honestly.

Derek sighed. "I don't know. This just…it wasn't part of the plan. I mean, if she actually is, then fine. I guess we'd be parents sooner rather than later. I just…I have to talk to her…to find out for sure."

"That'd probably be wise", Mark said with a nod. Good luck man", he said as he patted him on the back.

"Thanks", Derek sighed. This wasn't going to be an easy night. There was bound to be an argument. But no matter what, Derek wasn't walking away.

After Meredith got out of surgery, she was feeling even worse than before. Her back hurt and she was feeling nauseous. As she tried to pull her jeans on, she couldn't zip them up all the way. "Damn", she muttered. There was nothing more she wanted to do than go home to bed.

"Hey", Derek said softly as he leaned against the doorway. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah. In a minute", she said as she gathered up her belongings and tossed them into her bag.

As they were driving home, Meredith looked at him. "Did you want to go to Joe's?"

"Yeah we could", he said with a smile.

"Not with me, with Mark. I know you turned him down the other night. You can go if you wanted to", Meredith told him.

"It's okay. I'd rather just go home", Derek said with an assuring smile.

"You can do things without me, you know. I don't want you to give up all your time to be with me. I want us to be able to have some space, too. Not like that, but…I want us to be able to…"

"I get it. We shouldn't feel obligated to spend every minute together", he said softly.

"Yeah", Meredith nodded.

"I promise we won't do that", he said as he rubbed her knee. "But tonight all I want to do is go home with you."

"Okay", Meredith said with a small smile.

As they pulled into the driveway, Derek noticed she put her hand on her abdomen.

"You okay? Did you get sick earlier?", he asked, a look of concern in his eyes.

"Yeah. I did. I'm just not feeling well", she said as they entered the house. "I just want to go to bed."

After she took some ibuprofen, they headed upstairs. "Are you pregnant?", Derek blurted out quickly before he had time to think about it.

"What?", she asked, a shocked look on her face. "No! I'm not pregnant! Why would you think I was pregnant?"

"I just…You don't seem like yourself, and I know you're not feeling well, and I know we've always been careful but…and I was just…", he said in a panic.

"No, Derek! I'm not pregnant!", she yelled.

"Okay", he said quickly. "I'm sorry for even suggesting. I'm sorry", he said in surrender.

"Don't you think I would tell you if I was pregnant?", she asked, the hurt evident in her voice.

"You're right. I'm sorry", he said softly. _Okay, I'm an ass_, he thought to himself.

As Meredith went to leave the room, she stopped herself and turned around to face him. She drew in a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down. "Okay. I shouldn't have snapped", she said as she brushed her hair away from her face.

"No, it's okay", he said softly. "I'm sorry."

All of the sudden, Meredith collapsed down onto the floor and began crying.

Derek rushed over to her. "It's okay, Mer. I'm here", he said as he scooped her into his arms. "What's wrong?"

"It's that frigging time of the month, Derek. I'm in pain. My stomach hurts. My back hurts. I have horrible cramps. My jeans don't fit right now. Izzie used the last damn tampon. I can't find the heating pad. Everything I eat doesn't want to stay down. My interns are complete morons. There's all this weird, awkward tension between my friends. And I don't know how to fix it, because no one but me is making any kind of effort. And I'm horny, but we can't have sex, for obvious reasons, but also because that's part of our rules. And I feel like the horrible girlfriend who keeps you from having a social life outside of me. I'm tired. And…you thought I was _pregnant_", she ranted angrily as she continued to cry.

"Oh, Meredith", he said as he rubbed her back. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"I should have just told you earlier today. I just didn't want to start anything", Meredith confessed.

"I'm sorry, Mer. I shouldn't have assumed that. And I shouldn't have just come out and asked you. That was mean", he said, kissing her forehead.

"I know you were just worried about me", she said before pausing. "I think we broke one of our own rules", Meredith said as she began to relax in his arms.

"Yeah. I think we did. Let's try not to do that again", he said softly.

"I'm sorry", she sniffled.

"For what? You didn't do anything", Derek told her.

"For yelling and crying and ranting, although I must admit, I do feel a hell of a lot better. You probably think I'm insane", she sighed.

"No I don't", he assured her, pulling her closer into his arms. "I'm glad you did. I'm glad you feel better. That's good…healthy. You proved something tonight."

"What?", she asked as she looked into his eyes.

"That we can get fight, and stick around long enough to make it through to the other side, because we love each other", he said as he caressed her cheek. "We're learning that giving up on someone you love is never the way to go."

"Yeah", Meredith agreed, tears welling in her eyes.

"I love you", he said as he kissed her gently.

"I love you too", she said as they parted.

"I don't know if I can fix the problems with your friends, but we can talk about it and I'll try to help. As for your interns…you'll get them in line", he said with a slight laugh. "Why don't you go take a shower, and I'll go out and buy a heating pad and some tampons", he suggested with a smile.

"I don't want you to have to buy tampons for me, Derek", she said, laughing softly.

"Meredith, nothing would make me happier", he said playfully. "I'll even buy you some comfort food."

Meredith just stared at him, tears pouring from her eyes. She fell even more in love with him for making the small gesture. "God, I'm such a mess. I'm sorry. I just…thank you", she said with a small smile playing her lips.

"You don't have to thank me. I'm happy to do it", he said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, and wiping her tears away with his thumb.

"Come on", he said as he lifted her up off the floor. He grabbed her some pajamas and a towel and led her toward the bathroom.

As he walked out to give her some privacy, she gently tugged him back and hugged him. "I love you so much", she mumbled into his chest.

"I love you too", he said as he kissed her the top of her head.

"I'll be back soon. But take your time", he said softly.

"Okay", she nodded as he closed the door behind him.

Derek returned twenty minutes later. He chuckled softly to himself when he heard that the shower was still running. He was glad she could just relax. The hot water would help her feel better. Derek plugged in the heating pad so it would be warm for her when she got into bed. He bought two boxes of tampons, placing one under the sink in her bathroom, and leaving the other one outside the bathroom door in the hallway. Then he put some Midol, a bottle of ginger ale, a bowl of chicken noodle soup, some crackers, and a few chocolate bars on a tray and brought it upstairs. As he did all of this, he couldn't help but feel a bit husband-ish. He smiled at the thought, wanting nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with Meredith Grey.

Derek got into bed and waited for her, knowing she would want him to be there.

"Hey", she said softly as she walked into the room and crawled into bed. "You did all this?", she asked with a smile.

"I did", he said, kissing her cheek. "Do you feel a little better?"

"Yeah. I do actually", she said as he wrapped his arm around her small frame and pulled her close.

"Good", he said with a warm smile. "I want you to eat something. Then take these pills", he told her.

She laughed at his great concern for her. "Okay. I will."

"What?", he asked with a questioning smile as he reached over her to get the heating pad off of the nightstand. He gently placed it on her abdomen, careful not to move the tray that covered her legs.

"Are you going to do this every month?", she asked with a giggle that made his heart melt every time.

"If you want me to, I absolutely will", he said with a nod.

"Remind me never to let you go ever again", she said as she ate her food.

"I won't let you", he said assuringly. "I promise."

"I just…No one's ever taken care of me like this before. I appreciate it", she said with a small smile.

"Get used to it", he said playfully. "I'm not going anywhere, remember?"

"I know", she said as she kissed him softly before shoving a piece of her candy bar into his mouth.

"Mer, you know I don't eat this junk", he said with a laugh.

"Get used to it. I'm going to ruin your diet", she giggled. "I'm not going anywhere either."

"I know", he said as he pulled her closer and began rubbing her back. "So, what's up with your friends?"

Meredith took in a deep breath. "Okay. Ever since Izzie and George slept together—", she began before Derek cut her off.

"What?", he asked in a shocked voice.

"Oh, I guess you didn't know that", she shrugged.

"No, but okay. Continue", he said with a nod.

"Okay, so, they slept together a few months ago. I didn't even know about it until Callie announced it in front of everybody one morning. Alex is pissed at both of them, because I'm pretty sure he still loves Izzie, even though he's sleeping with Lexie, who, by the way, I'm actually starting to let into my life and that scares me but that's a whole different topic. And Cristina is angry with Izzie because she hurt Callie, who is now living with Cristina. And Cristina still hasn't really dealt with the whole Burke thing and I don't want to push her away because we need each other, so I just act like everything is okay when it clearly isn't. And because all of my friends sort of live here, the weird, awkward tension never stops. And that sucks, because we're always together. And…I just don't know what to do", she said before pausing. "Okay. That was a lot. A lot of rambling and ranting, but…that's what up with my friends", she said as she exhaled.

"Okay then", Derek said as he processed all of the information that had just been thrown at him. "You should tell them that. Tell them what you just told me. Just get it all out there. I think you'll feel better if you do. And because you're all friends, you can say it and it'll be okay", he said with an assuring nod.

"I know", Meredith sighed. "I just wish things could be the way they used to be, you know? They're my family. I need them."

"It'll be okay. Just talk to them. And, you can always talk to me. I'm here. I can be your family too", he said with a warm smile, looking into her tearful green eyes.

"Okay", she said in a barely audible voice.

"Okay", he repeated. "All finished? Did you take the pills?"

"Yeah", she said with a nod.

Derek reached over and took the tray. "I'll be right back." He put the ginger ale on her nightstand and carried the tray downstairs. While he was gone, Meredith shed a few tears. For the first time in her life, she felt what it was like to have another person care for her so deeply. Someone who loved her for her. She could be herself around him. She could laugh and cry and know that no matter what, he would be by her side.

"So, I was thinking we could just spend the day in bed tomorrow since we both have off", he said when he returned. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm okay", she said as she wiped her eyes. "I love you", she said with a small smile.

Derek crawled back into bed and wrapped his arms around her body. "I love you too. So much", he said before kissing her on top of her still damp head.

"Der?", she asked softly.

"Yeah?"

"What if I had been…pregnant I mean", she asked.

He pulled back and looked into her eyes. "It would have been okay. Our plan would have just been a little out of order, but it would be okay", he assured her with a small smile.

"What is our plan?", she asked innocently.

Derek swallowed hard. "Well, I was thinking we would…once we were both ready…we would get married, build the house, then start a family", he told her softly.

"I like that", she said with a small smile, a single tear running down her face.

"Yeah?", he asked, the hope evident in his blue eyes.

Meredith nodded before kissing him softly. "I think I like this whole talking thing", she said as they parted for air.

"Me too", he said before taking her hand in his own.

"I feel like we've turned into this old couple. The one that replaced sex with eating soup in bed on a Friday night", she joked.

"That's okay with me. As long as you're here with me, I don't care", he said sincerely, kissing her cheek.

Meredith bit her lip to fight back tears and stared at him. "That's why I know you're the love of my life. Because being together is enough for us."

Now it was Derek's turn to cry. Meredith had never called him the love of her life before. "Yeah", he said with a tearful smile before capturing her lips with his own for a long and passionate kiss. The kind of kiss that sends sparks through your body, and makes you never want to part for air. Neither had ever experienced that kind of connection with anyone else before. They both knew it was something special that only occurred between the two of them. And they knew it would last forever.

Eventually, they both laid down in the bed. Meredith spooned against Derek's body so that every part of them was touching. She felt Derek's hand on her abdomen as he held the heating pad in place for her. Meredith placed her hand over his and snuggled closer to his body. "I love you so much, Derek", she said in a soft voice.

"I love you too, Meredith", he said as he nuzzled his face into her neck.

As Derek slept, Meredith was overcome with intense love for him. Even while he was sleeping, he managed to hold the warm heating pad up against her aching body. He made her feel safe and warm and loved all at the same time. All of the sudden, her faith in their plan for the future was sealed. She knew they would make it.

**A/N. ****Yeah, I'm a sucker for cuddly bedtime scenes. I wasn't going to make Meredith pregnant, because in my opinion, and unexpected pregnancy is not part of their love story. I want them to have a stable, healthy, committed relationship, and then have a baby on their own terms and when they're ready. ****This was just supposed to deepen their commitment and love for one an****other. I hope I was successful. I also thought it would be nice to save Bailey's marriage. That's one ship that shouldn't have to sink due to Shonda's antics. :)**

**Also, in my ongoing attempt to redeem Derek Shepherd, I want to believe that he'd be the McDreamy guy that would go out and buy her tampons and hold the heating pad on her stomach. To me, that's who Derek is. :)**

**Reviews make me a happy camper. :)**


	6. Trust

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine. **** Woo ****Hoo****! The strike is over:)**

**The next day.**

Meredith woke up the next morning still in the familiar embrace of Derek's arms. She gently wiggled her body around to face him. Apparently, he had gotten used to her snoring, seeing as he was still asleep beside her. She curled up closer to him and buried her face into his warm chest, breathing in the scent that belonged solely to Derek.

After several minutes, Meredith felt the need to stand up and stretch her body. She gently replaced her body with a pillow for him to wrap his arm around. Derek moved slightly but remained sleeping. Meredith tiptoed out and walked downstairs to the kitchen after using the bathroom.

"Oh. Hi, Meredith. I was just making coffee. I hope you don't mind. I, um…", Lexie said meekly when she noticed Meredith enter the kitchen.

"It's fine", Meredith said with a small smile. "Thank you", she said as she took a seat at the island.

"Would you like some?", Lexie asked kindly.

"Sure. Thanks", Meredith said with a small nod.

"Are you off today?", Lexie asked as she poured the coffee, in an attempt to make conversation.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

"Me too. Actually, um, George and I were going to look for an apartment", Lexie said, wondering if Meredith would get angry over the news.

"Really?", Meredith asked with a smile. "That's good."

"Yeah. I feel bad, you know, spending so much time over here", Lexie told her.

"It's okay. I don't mind. There's always people here", Meredith joked. "It's normal."

"It's just that I can't live at home anymore. My dad—", Lexie started before stopping herself. "Uh, our, um, dad…I have to live my own life. I can't spend all of my time taking care of him."

"Yeah", Meredith said softly, knowing that any talk of Thatcher was bound to be an awkward, uncomfortable conversation.

"I'm sorry", Lexie said, shaking her head. "I know that it's—"

"I get it", Meredith said with an assuring nod. After a few moments of silence, Meredith spoke again. "This probably shouldn't feel so awkward. It's not your fault that…I can't blame you for what happened. I don't. It's just…"

Lexie nodded and kept her eyes fixed on her coffee cup. "I know. I guess it seems like I got _your_ life…the life you should have had. Molly and I…we didn't even know we had another sister until my mom— If we did, we would have made them…", she said softly.

"I know. It's okay. I know it's hard to believe, but I don't hate you", Meredith said as the two made eye contact. "You're actually okay for being someone I'm semi-related to", she admitted with a slight laugh.

"Yeah. It's good to have someone whose sort of family, even though, well, the whole estranged father thing kind of puts a damper on it", Lexie said sadly.

"Yeah", Meredith agreed. "I guess it does."

"We can be friends, I mean, if you wanted to. I don't expect us to be all sister-y at first. But, I'd like to think that maybe one day, we could be close", Lexie said with a look of hope in her eyes.

"Okay. Yeah", Meredith said softly.

"Really?", Lexie asked, somewhat surprised by Meredith's answer.

"Yeah. That would be…yeah, I would like that", Meredith admitted with a small smile.

"Okay", Lexie said with a slight nod.

The two drank their coffee in a comfortable silence for several minutes before George entered the kitchen and poured himself a cup.

"Hey George", Meredith smiled.

"Morning", George greeted warmly. "Why are you up so early?"

Meredith shrugged. "I went to bed at 10:00 last night."

"Seriously?", George asked with a slight laugh.

"Yeah. I wasn't feeling well", Meredith said.

"Are you okay?", Lexie asked concernedly.

"Oh. Yeah. I'm fine", Meredith said with a nod.

"You sure?", George asked as he felt her forehead.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Yes. I'm sure."

"Okay. Well, we have to get going", George told Lexie. "We're looking for an apartment", he said to Meredith.

"I heard. I'm happy for you", Meredith said with a smile. "Good luck, guys."

"Thanks", Lexie said kindly. "See you, Meredith."

"Bye", Meredith smiled.

After George and Lexie left, Meredith poured herself and Derek two cups of coffee and made her way back upstairs. She placed them on her nightstand and got back into bed with him. "Hey", Meredith said softly as she rubbed his arm.

Derek opened his eyes and looked up at her. "Hey", he said with a small smile.

"Coffee?", she yawned as she handed him the cup.

"Thanks", he said as he sat up in bed and took the cup from her hands. "How you feeling, sweetie?"

"Uh, I feel a little better…what's with the 'sweetie' thing?", she asked with raised brows.

Derek smiled at her. "It's a term of endearment. I figured we could use them. Might be fun", he said with a shrug.

"Right. Okay", Meredith smirked.

"What?", he asked with a smile.

"Nothing…dear", Meredith joked.

"Now you're mocking me", he laughed.

"I would never…", she said before Derek cut her off.

"You would", Derek said with a nod. "That's okay. I love you anyway", he said before kissing her on the cheek.

"Love you too", Meredith said softly. "So, what did you want to do today?"

"Stay in bed", Derek told her.

"No, Derek. We don't have to. I feel better, really", she said with a big nod.

Derek shrugged. "Either way, all I want to do is lay in bed with you today."

"Okay", Meredith said with a small smile.

"This coffee is good. Did you make it?", he asked.

"Um, actually, Lexie made it", Meredith told him.

"Oh, so, were you two…talking?", Derek asked her.

"Yeah", Meredith said softly. "She's nice."

"What did you talk about?"

Meredith shrugged. "Family crap."

"Oh", Derek said with a curious nod.

"She wants us to be…sisters. Or maybe not 'sister sisters', but get to the point where it won't be so awkward to be sort of like sisters", Meredith rambled.

"What?"

"I don't know. Never mind", Meredith yawned.

"Do you want to be sisters with your sister?", Derek asked.

"Yeah. I do I guess, sort of. There's just a lot of stuff that comes along with that. Like my father…", Meredith said rolling her eyes.

"Did you want to talk to me about it?", Derek asked, a hopeful look in his eyes.

"No", Meredith said immediately.

Derek just tilted his head and looked at her.

"Don't do that", Meredith told him.

"Do what?"

"Look at me like that. Every time you do that, I give in", Meredith said frankly.

"Why do you think I do that?", Derek asked with a smirk.

"You're an ass", she laughed as she nudged his shoulder.

Derek wrapped his arm around her and kissed her on the cheek. "Fine. I'm an ass. But I still think we should talk about your family. I think it would be good for you."

"Fine", Meredith said taking a deep breath. After several moments of silence, Meredith spoke again. "I've never done this before. I don't know where to start."

"Start at the beginning. I really don't know a lot about you…which is…I don't know. I just think I should know more about you than I do", Derek said softly.

"Okay. Uh…", Meredith said, trying to think of something to say. "I knew", she said softly.

"Knew what?"

"I knew what was going on. Well, not the whole story, because I didn't really get it when I was five, but…in my kid logic, I knew about my mom and the Chief", Meredith said softly.

Derek looked at her and nodded, willing her to continue. He knew this wasn't easy for her, but he was thankful that she was making the effort.

Meredith shrugged. "I guess I thought it would get better. I tried to pretend I didn't hear the fighting. My dad never let on that anything was wrong. He always made sure I was happy. But my mother…she didn't check to see if I was okay", she said, tears building in her eyes.

"And that never really changed. Even after the two of us moved to Boston, she…she didn't care", Meredith said simply. "So I stopped caring. It was easier not to, you know? My father obviously didn't care. He knew what she was like. And he let it happen. I guess he was afraid of her. But I was the kid. I didn't know what was happening to my family and nobody ever stopped to ask me how I felt", she said as a few tears escaped her eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

Derek didn't know what to say so he just wiped her tears away with his thumb.

"So I learned to live with it. High school, college, med school, I was alone. But…", she said with a small smile appearing despite the tears. "…then I came back here. And it all sort of turned out okay."

Derek reached for her hand and took it in his own. "I'm sorry", he said as tears pricked in his eyes. "I'm sorry you had a childhood like that. No one deserves that, Meredith. I promise that I'm going to try to make up for it. I never want you to feel like that…lonely or sad. And I know I made you feel that way before, but I'm here now. I'm here and I love you. I'll always be here, Meredith. Okay? I promise", he said sincerely as he hugged her tightly.

"My severe abandonment issues don't have you running for the hills?", she joked through her tears.

"Nope", he said as he kissed her on the top of her head. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Thanks", she said softly.

"Thank you for talking to me. I know it's not easy for you to talk about things like that, especially your family. But, I appreciate it", he said, wrapping his arms around her.

Meredith nodded as she hugged him back. They both sat in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the familiar comfort of each other's arms.

"I promised myself a long time ago that if I ever had kids, I wouldn't do that to them", she said softly.

"You won't do that, because you lived it. You know what that kind of life is like. You'll be better than your parents, Meredith", Derek assured her.

"Okay", she said, a trusting look in her eyes.

"Okay", Derek repeated with a small smile.

"How are you always so sure that things will turn out?", Meredith asked him.

Derek shrugged. "Sometimes you just have to trust that it'll all be okay. There's really no logic behind it. There's no big secret. You just have to have faith. I think the fact that you and I managed to make it through everything we've been through is reason enough to believe", he explained softly.

"Yeah", Meredith said with a small smile. "I guess it is."

"I love you", he said before kissing her deeply and passionately, wanting her to know just how much he cared for her.

"I love you too", she said breathlessly as they pulled back.

Derek smiled at her and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I'm tired", she said sleepily.

"Go back to sleep", Derek said as he laid them back in bed.

"You're not tired", Meredith pointed out.

"I'll lay here until you fall asleep. Then I'll go get a shower and we can order lunch", he said with a smile.

"Mmm, I think I like this whole being lazy in bed thing", she giggled.

"Me too", he said with a nod.

Meredith curled up close to him and he wrapped his arms protectively around her. Derek knew that crying and expressing feelings always took a lot out of her. But he was thankful that she was finally opening up to him. The 'evolving' as she called it was progressing little by little every day. Both of them were willing to do whatever it took to make this work.

Derek soothed her and rubbed her back, and within minutes, Meredith had fallen asleep in his arms. Apparently the caffeine in the two cups of coffee she had consumed had no effect on her. As he laid there holding her, he felt sorry for her. For all she had to go through. For her sad childhood. He couldn't imagine going through that. It made him appreciate his own family. Because, well, he had one. He grew up with loving parents and sisters that adore him.

Meredith didn't have that. Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad if she could have had someone to share in the sadness with, like a brother or sister. But she was alone. All alone. Five years old. One day she had a family, and the next day it was gone. And because of it, Meredith built up walls. Walls that would protect her from feeling the pain of her loneliness. Walls that kept her safe from those that hurt her. The walls that were just beginning to be knocked down. She was beginning to trust those around her. It was slow, but it was progress.

As he held her, the guilt slowly came over him. He lied to her. And just as she was starting to let her guard down, all of her trust in him was taken away. He had accused her, forced her into being ready, told her he didn't want to breathe for her, told her that she couldn't trust anybody. It wasn't really a big secret as to why she didn't swim or that her trust in him had completely faltered. It was partially his fault and he took responsibility for it. And her parents were no better. To grow up in a home without a father, and with no love, support or encouragement from your emotionally distant mother certainly isn't an easy thing to cope with.

He looked down at her sleeping form, which was blurry because of the tears in his eyes. In that moment, he made a silent vow to her that he would always be there. He wouldn't be just another person on her list of those that gave up on her. Instead, he would be the one that would show her how to trust in life. To have faith that sometimes, despite all odds and all logic, just believing it would all be okay was reason enough.

After Derek showered, he ordered lunch and the two spent the whole day relaxing in bed. They took full advantage of their day off.

"You know what I think?", Meredith asked with a mouth full of spaghetti. "I think we should both quit and stay in bed every day and eat, just eat."

Derek laughed at her. "You know you could never quit being a surgeon. It's in your blood."

"Yeah I guess. But this is pretty damn good too", Meredith joked.

"It is", Derek agreed.

"Here. Eat this. It's good'", she said as she shoved a buttered roll into his mouth.

"Mer, there's like, a whole stick of butter on this thing", Derek said as he attempted to chew.

Meredith nodded. "Mhm. I love butter."

"I can see that", Derek said with a smile as she ate her own roll.

"This is what couples do, right?", Meredith asked with a grin.

"Clog their arteries from butter overload? Yeah, couples do that", he joked.

"Okay. Good", Meredith giggled.

"I love that", Derek said with a smile.

"What?", she asked.

"Your laugh", he shrugged. "It's just…I love it", he said, kissing her on the cheek.

Meredith just smiled at him. "When you say things like that to me, it makes me want to take you right here and now."

"It's true", he said with smile. "And I love you."

"I love you too", she said as she kissed him softly on the lips, still giggling softly.

"…dear", Meredith said as they pulled back.

Derek looked at her and pretended to be insulted. "Again with the mocking. You're so mean to me", he joked.

"Get used to it", she said as she continued to laugh.

This was the Meredith he once knew. The ballsy one that bossed him around and kept him in line. He didn't mind the mocking. In fact, he loved it. He loved that she was happy and comfortable around him. She trusted him enough to let her guard down in front of him.

She could be Meredith. And he could be Derek. And that was how it should be.

**Reviews make me happy. :)**


	7. Forever

**Disclaimer: ****I wish.**

**Thanks for the reviews.**** I guess this chapter takes place a week or two later.**

"Mer?", Derek asked as he knocked lightly on the bedroom door.

"You can come in", Meredith yelled to him.

Derek walked in the room to find Meredith wrapped in a towel. "Oh, did you want me to come back…once you're dressed?"

"No it doesn't matter. It's not like you haven't seen it all before. I just wanted to take a quick shower. Working with abscesses isn't all it's cracked up to be", Meredith said with a sigh.

"Yeah I guess not. I just wanted to tell you I was going to run to the store to pick up some things. There's no food in this house", Derek said with a smile.

"Hmm. You gonna cook for me?", Meredith asked as she walked up to him and kissed him softly.

"I guess I could", he said, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Am I seducing you?", she giggled.

"Seeing as you're wrapped in a towel and you smell like your conditioner, yeah. A little bit", he said with a smile before breathing in the scent of her hair.

"Good", Meredith said as she pulled away and walked over to her drawers. "So, what are you making for me?"

"Whatever you want."

"Hmm…how about steak?", she asked as she dropped her towel and pulled her panties on.

"Mer!", Derek said, half shocked and half amused.

"Oh, relax", Meredith sighed, rolling her eyes. "Consider yourself lucky. I wouldn't do that in front of anybody else but you."

"Good to know", he said with a smile.

"So…steak", Meredith repeated, as she clasped her bra and pulled on some pajamas.

"I can do that", he said with a nod.

"Good."

"I love you", Derek said as he hugged her and kissed her cheek. "I'll be back in a little while."

"Okay", Meredith said, her face pressed against his chest.

"You're going to have to let go", he laughed.

"In a minute."

"Okay", he said softly as they stood in the embrace of each other's arms for a while.

Meredith's growling stomach broke the silence. "Hungry?", Derek joked.

"Very. You can go now", Meredith said as she pulled back from their hug.

"Okay. Love you", he said with a smile.

"Love you too", she smiled back.

After Derek left, Meredith went down to tidy up the house. While she was cleaning the living room, the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey", she heard Cristina's voice say on the other end.

"Hey. What's up? Are you okay?", Meredith asked.

"Ugh. Callie invited McSteamy and Hahn over", Cristina said in a disgusted tone.

"What? Why?"

"Apparently they're friends. I swear it's like Three's Company over here."

"Where are you?"

"Camped out in my room with beer and cereal", Cristina said as she shoveled a handful into her mouth.

"Kick them out."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because. Hahn already hates me, and I still have to get on her good side if I want a future in cardio. Kicking her out is a one way ticket to ortho…or the vagina squad", Cristina shuddered.

"What are they doing?", Meredith asked.

"Playing games. I think. I'm not sure. I haven't been out there in a while."

"Well, if you think you can get out of there unnoticed, you can come over. Derek's cooking dinner when he gets home from the food store."

"What are you doing?", Cristina asked.

"Cleaning."

"Seriously? You clean and he cooks. You two need to have sex."

"Ugh, I know", Meredith sighed. "It's been a few weeks, and the beast is getting impatient."

"Honestly, how long do you think you can go before you're tearing each other's clothes off again?", Cristina asked.

"Not much longer. And I feel bad making him wait", Meredith confessed.

"Just do him."

"You sound like Alex", Meredith joked.

"Even still…"

"I want to. Does that make me look weak? If I want to start having sex with him again?", Meredith asked.

"I doubt McDreamy would protest."

"Me either…anyway, you can come over", Meredith repeated.

"Nah I'm okay", Cristina told her.

"You're just going to live off of your beer and cereal rations until they leave?", Meredith joked.

"I'd rather do that than watch you and Derek have eye sex. Thanks for the offer though. I have to study for surgery tomorrow anyway."

"You sure? If you change your mind, just come over", Meredith told her.

"Okay. Thanks. See you tomorrow", Cristina said.

"Okay. Bye", Meredith said with a smile as she went to hang up the phone.

"Wait—", Cristina yelled into the phone.

"What?"

"I want sex details. If you two decide to 'feed the beast', I want details. I'm not getting any", Cristina told her.

Meredith laughed. "There will be no 'feeding of the beast.' Not tonight anyway."

"Sure, Meredith. Whatever you say", Cristina said sarcastically.

"Shut up", Meredith said, still laughing. "See you later."

"Bye", Cristina said as they ended their conversation.

Eventually, Derek came home to discover Meredith cleaning up the dining room. "Hey", he said with a smile. "You're cleaning?"

"I am. Proud of me?", Meredith giggled as she left the mess momentarily to join him in the kitchen as he started to make dinner for them.

"Of course", he said, kissing her softly.

"So Cristina called. Apparently Callie, Mark, and Hahn are hanging out in her living room. So she barricaded herself in her room. I invited her over, but she said no because…", Meredith said before stopping herself.

"Because why?"

"Apparently we have eye sex, and she didn't want to watch", Meredith said with a slight laugh.

"Hmm. I think she's right", Derek smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him as he began kissing her neck, causing her to lose all coherent thought.

"Derek", she moaned. "Dinner."

"Okay", he said, continuing to kiss her.

"Der", she moaned again. "Hungry."

"Okay", he said, pulling away from her.

"Wait", Meredith said, pulling him back and pressing a kiss to his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"I want to help you", Meredith said as she took the items out of the bag and put them on the table.

"You sure?"

"Yes. I'm sure", she smiled.

"Okay. You can peel the potatoes", he said with a smile.

"Okay", she said as she walked over to the drawer to get the peeler before taking a seat at the island.

As Derek marinated the steak, Meredith felt his eyes on her. "You're looking at me", she said with a smirk.

"I'm not looking at you", he said, shaking his head.

"You're looking at me", she repeated.

"This conversation sounds all too familiar", he said with a smile.

"Hmm?", Meredith asked.

"Oh come on. Have you forgotten about the amazing sex…at the prom", he said with raised brows.

"Oh. That conversation. Yeah", Meredith said, suddenly flustered.

"What's wrong?", he asked, a look of concern on his face.

"Oh…nothing…I just…nothing…peeling", she said with a nod.

"Mer."

"Sex", she blurted out.

"What?"

"Sex. I want sex. And I know you want it. And I think it's been long enough. I trust you and I know you're not going to leave me. And that you love me. And we're okay. So I was thinking we could maybe have sex again", she said quickly.

"What?", Derek asked softly.

"Sex", she repeated.

"Not that. The other part", he said, a small smile forming on his lips.

"Oh…the part about…I just…we're okay. I'm happy…and I trust you…and I love you", she said, biting her lip.

"That would be the part", he said as he walked over to her and spun the chair around so she was facing him. "We're okay."

"We're okay", she said softly.

"I love you. I love you so much", he said as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you too", she said, resting her face against his chest. "So…sex."

"Mer, I'll wait. Don't feel pressured. It's up to you", he said softly, looking into her green eyes.

"I think…I think I'm ready again", she said with a small nod.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I just…sex is important to us. I think that maybe it'll help us, you know, with the commitment thing. It might give us more…"

"Reassurance?"

"Yeah", she said. "I couldn't think of the word."

"That's why I'm here", he joked.

"Cheesy", she giggled.

"You're mean", he said as he kissed her neck again.

"Der…food now…sex….later", she said with great difficulty.

"Okay", he said softly before kissing her forehead and walking back around the island to finish making dinner.

"So…we can have sex…tonight?", she suggested.

"As long as you're okay with it, I'm okay with it", he assured her.

"I am. Believe me, I am. Actually, I'm surprised we went this long", she laughed.

"The cuddling was nice. I'm all for the cuddling", he smiled.

"I like the cuddling too", she said with a small smile. "You're the first person I've ever done that with", she confessed.

"Done what with?"

Meredith shrugged. "Cuddle. Physical affection was never my mother's strong suit. I don't know…I just…I like when you just hold me", she said, blushing slightly.

"I like it too. In fact, I love it", he said with a smile. Inside, his heart was aching for her. He wondered if Ellis had ever hugged her. Or kissed her. Or did anything that parents usually did. He doubted it. But he was there now. And he was staying. He planned on holding her for the rest of their lives. He decided against saying this out loud, for fear it would freak her out. If she wanted baby steps, that was fine with him.

They finished cooking and ate their food happily. They were comfortable around each other. Conversation came easily. There was never an awkward silence. They could be themselves, and that was enough for them.

"I'll clean up. You can go take a shower", Meredith told him with as smile when they were finished eating.

"I got it."

"No. You already made me dinner. Now I want you to go relax. And then…we'll have sex", she said with a grin.

"Bossy", he said as he pressed his lips against hers.

"You like bossy", she murmured against his lips. "Go. Shower."

"Okay", he said as he reluctantly pulled back from her and headed upstairs.

After she cleaned up the kitchen, Meredith continued tidying up the dining room, doing anything she could to take her mind off of her horniness. As she was cleaning, she came across something that caught her eye. The house plans. The ones Derek had left there the day he told her about them.

Meredith figured she had done enough cleaning for the day and decided to go up to bed. After brushing her teeth, she crawled into bed and opened the tube with the blueprints. She spread them out on the bed. Memories flooded her mind. French doors. Kids bedrooms. Guest bedrooms. Huge windows overlooking Seattle. A big backyard with enough room for a patio, pool, and a trampoline. And enough room for kids to run around in. Their dream house. As Meredith studied them, she found herself blinking away tears. It was perfect. Everything about it was perfect.

In that moment, she realized she wanted it. All of it. She and Derek. A marriage. A house. _This house_. The one on the blueprints. And kids. Kids that were a little piece of both of them. Kids that she would love so much it scared her.

Looking at those blueprints, their future on paper, Meredith could no longer fight back the tears. The dam burst. Several tears managed to stain the blueprints, but Meredith didn't care. All she could think about in that moment was Derek. _What am I doing?_, she asked herself. _This is Derek. The man I met in a bar and fell in love with. The man who changed my life without ever trying. The man that makes my wor__ld __stop__. The only person that knows me, the real me. All he has to do is look at me and he knows what I'm feeling. The only man I ever loved, and that ever loved me. My soul mate. The love of my life._

As Meredith sat there, contemplating her newfound realization, Derek entered the room. "Hey", he said happily until he saw her, tears streaming down her face. "What's wrong?", he asked as he got in the bed with her, noticing the house plans strewn across the covers.

"I just…this…us. I want it. I want it, Derek. All of it. And I want it with you. I don't want to wait anymore. I'm…this is…Derek, I love you", she said as she continued to cry.

Derek sat there in shock until his mind comprehended all she had just said. "Meredith", was all he could manage to say.

"Derek. I'm in this…with you. I want this. I'm sure", she said, smiling in spite of the tears.

"Everything? As in…you and me, and a house, and—", he asked before Meredith cut him off.

"And a marriage, and kids. Yes", she nodded.

"I…when did all this...I'm…"

"I don't know. I just…after I blurted out all of those things in the kitchen, I didn't even think about what I said. I just said it, and I realized it was all true …and then, I saw the blueprints and I knew that must be a sign or something. A sign that I should just go for it, you know? Stop being afraid, and just trust in it. This is it for me, Derek", she said, tears still free flowing down her face.

Derek's vision blurred and all he could do was nod. He took her face in his hands and kissed her deeply. "I love you, Meredith."

"I love you too", she said, her voice barely audible.

"I love you. I love you. I love you", he repeated over and over between kisses.

"I love you", Meredith answered breathlessly every time.

"I really love you."

"I love you too."

"Meredith."

"Hmm?"

"Marry me", he said as he broke their kiss.

Meredith froze and looked at him, tears filling her eyes again. "Huh?"

"Marry me", he repeated, looking directly into her bright green eyes.

"Der", she gasped.

"Meredith, will you marry me?", he asked, his heart so full of love for the woman next to him, sitting in her pajamas, her honey hair splayed over the tiny frame of her shoulders.

After looking at him for a few moments, her brain trying to form a word, any word, she finally spoke. "Yes", she said, erupting into a fit of tears. "Yes", she repeated, this time with a smile, before leaning her head against his shoulder, staining his white t-shirt with tears.

"Yes?", he asked, in shock.

"Yes", she breathed.

"Real yes? Like 'actually getting married and being husband and wife and spending a lifetime together' yes?", he asked with wide eyes.

"Yes", she whispered, pressing her lips against his.

"Okay."

"Okay."

"I love you", he repeated for the thousandth time that night.

"I love…I'm…we're…oh my God…you're my…we're…engaged", she panted, barely able to catch her breath after everything that had just happened.

"Yeah", he said, swallowing hard, his heart pounding in his chest. He was still trying to make sense of the past five minutes. He had no intention of asking her to marry him. It just came out. And yet, even if he had planned it, it couldn't have gone any better.

"Oh my God, Derek", she said as she looked into his eyes. "Is this…are we…is this really happening?"

"I don't know. I think so", he said with a nod.

"Yeah."

"Are you okay?", he asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I am. I love you, Derek."

"I love you too, Meredith", he said as he wrapped his arms around her. Meredith did the same, hugging him back.

"Oh my God", she whispered, kissing his cheek. "Derek."

"I know", he said as he gently rubbed her back, afraid that any second he'd wake up from a dream.

"This is it?"

"This is it", he assured her. He had never been more certain of anything in his life.

In this moment, the world was confined to Meredith's bedroom. Nothing else mattered. It was just Meredith and Derek. Right then, life was perfect. And as long as they were together, it always would be.

Forever.

**I know. Farfetched. And yet…I'm hopeful. Maybe Shonda will give them happiness one day.**** So I might take a bit of break with this story for a while. At least until I plan out where I want to go from here. I might even stop until the end of season four depending on where Shonda takes it. We'll see. :)**

**Reviews make me happy.**


	8. Engaged

**Disclaimer: If Shonda wants to share, I'm game. Otherwise, I own nothing.**

**Thanks to those that review.**

"_Oh my God", she whispered, kissing his cheek. "Derek."_

"_I know", he said as he gently rubbed her back, afraid that any second he'd wake up from a dream._

"_This is it?"_

"_This is it", he assured her. He had never been more certain of anything in his life._

_In this moment, the world was confined to Meredith's bedroom. Nothing else mattered. It was just Meredith and Derek. Right then, life was perfect. And as long as they were together, it always would be._

_Forever._

They sat on the bed, neither wanting to move for fear that they would collapse without the support of each other's arms. Derek gently pulled her light body into his lap, and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I love you", he whispered.

Meredith wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into his blue eyes, still glossed with tears. "I love you too", she whispered back.

Derek smiled at her before capturing her lips with his own. She moaned in pleasure when he brushed his tongue past her lips, begging for entry. She granted his wish and their tongues collided. Derek gently nudged her onto her back, their lips staying locked in position. "Der", Meredith breathed. "Blue…prints."

"Okay", he said softly as they parted. He gathered up the blueprints and dropped them to the floor, giving them more room on the bed.

Derek quickly hovered over her, continuing to kiss her passionately. Meredith lifted her arms to run her fingers through his hair. "Derek", she said again, this time it was a low, pleading moan mixed with pleasure.

Derek nodded, knowing full well what she meant without speaking a word. He tugged at the bottom of her shirt before gently sliding it over her head. He began trailing a line of kisses from her neck down to her collarbone, before making his way to the valley between her breasts. Meredith drew in a deep breath before grasping at his shirt, attempting to take it off. Derek helped her, and it was next to hers on the floor in a matter of seconds.

He then returned his attention to her, nipping and kissing the sensitive spots on Meredith's chest and neck he knew all too well. "I love you", he murmured into her soft flesh.

"I love you too", she said quietly. "Pants", she mumbled, her fingers leaving the dark waves of his hair to untie the drawstring. It was a small struggle, but she finally succeeded in pushing them down past his legs, joining the puddle of clothes already forming on the floor.

Derek hooked his fingers in the elastic band of her pajama pants. Meredith arched her back as he slowly eased them down her legs, giving her enough time to reach behind and unclasp her bra. Derek made his way back up her body, and removed it from her shoulders. He cupped her breasts in his hands and kissed each one softly. "Der", she moaned. "Panties…off."

"Okay", he said softly, lifting his face to kiss her before gently easing her panties down her legs. Meredith was now completely exposed to him, but there was no apprehension or embarrassment. Derek looked directly into her green eyes, so full of trust and love for him. Once again, Derek pressed his lips to hers, while hastily shimmying out of his boxers.

"I love you", she panted against his lips, feeling his arousal against her inner thigh.

"I love you too", he said softly as he gently nudged her knees apart, leaving her open to him.

"Der", she moaned. "Now."

"Okay", he nodded, needing no further encouragement, knowing she was more than ready for him. He slowly slid into her, and they both stilled, savoring the perfection of the moment as he fit himself inside of her. He found her hands and pulled them up next to her ears. Derek laced their fingers, palm to palm before they began moving.

After several moments of peaceful quiet, Derek began to slowly thrust. As they moved together, Meredith looked deep into Derek's eyes, forgetting everything else but him and her, joined as one. Amazing feelings washed over her. This most certainly was not S&M. This was two people, after months of pain and heartache, finally rekindling the passion that had been pent up for so long. This wasn't just sex. This was making love.

"I love you", Meredith breathed as they moved in a slow, synchronized rhythm, neither wanting to rush this moment between them.

"I love you too", he mumbled into her neck. Several minutes went by and the slow, wonderful torture continued. Derek could feel that Meredith was close. He wanted to drag out the pleasure as long as he could, so he stopped thrusting, using the time to catch his breath before capturing her lips with his own. "Der…please", she begged, running her fingernails down his back.

"Okay", he said softly before regaining his rhythm. The feeling of Meredith clenching around him caused him to thrust deeper and harder, as he quickened his pace. Meredith soon climaxed around Derek, forgetting everything but the feeling of him inside of her. Derek followed Meredith over the edge. Meredith panted as she felt him release inside of her. For many moments afterward, they remained silent, still enveloped in the fog of their shared passion.

Derek collapsed onto her chest as they both tried to steady their breathing. She ran her hands down his back, feeling the familiar smooth muscle, while he gently kissed her chest and collarbone. The spark and intimacy between these two had never been stronger. It was amazing how much they could communicate through gestures rather than words.

"Der", Meredith breathed, her eyelashes fluttering in an attempt to look into his eyes.

Derek lifted his face and leaned up to kiss her. "I love you so much", he said softly.

"I love you too", she smiled, running her fingers through his hair. He gently pulled out of her and moved onto his side, pulling Meredith close to him. She nuzzled her face into his chest, the comfort and security of Derek's arms wrapped around her making her feel so safe and calm. This was the part she loved. The moment afterward, when the whole world stops. Making love to Derek was amazing, but this part was just as important to her.

Derek pulled the blanket over their naked bodies, before instinctively pulling Meredith even closer to him. He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "I love you", he repeated softly.

"I love you too", Meredith said sleepily. Keeping her eyes open had become increasingly more difficult.

Derek noticed her dark eyelashes fluttering. "Sleep", he whispered to her as he gently rubbed her back, lulling her into a peaceful slumber.

They didn't need words right now. The physical and emotional contact was enough for them at the moment. As Derek watched the love of his life sleeping in his arms, he couldn't help but smile. This whole night had been a crazy and amazing whirlwind. He fell even more in love with her, if that was even possible. Moments like this made all of the pain worthwhile. Their journey hadn't been an easy one. But they made it.

With this thought, Derek gave Meredith a soft kiss on the cheek, not wanting to wake her. "I love you, Mer. And I'm here. I promise. I'll be here forever."

MDMDMDMDMDMD

The next morning, Meredith attempted to wriggle her still naked body from his arms. Derek just pulled her closer, causing Meredith to let out a giggle. "Der."

"Hmm?", he mumbled sleepily.

"Let go."

"No", he said, keeping his eyes closed.

"I have to pee", she pouted.

"Okay", he said sleepily as he released his hold on her. "Come back."

"I am. Go back to sleep", she whispered, kissing him on the cheek.

Meredith crawled out of bed and walked into her private bathroom. She returned several minutes later to join Derek in bed once again. "I don't want to go to work today", she groaned.

"We'll stay home", he said, still in his sleepy state.

"I can't", she yawned, looking over at the clock. 5:20. "And we have to get up soon."

"No. We're staying home today", he told her.

"You're an attending. You're allowed. I'm a resident", she said as she nuzzled her face into his chest.

"Now you're a resident who's engaged to an attending", he reminded her.

"Crap. I am."

"'Crap'. Please don't tell me you're going back on the whole thing. That would be mean", he teased.

Meredith smiled at him before kissing him softly. "No, definitely not going back on it. I just…it sounds weird."

"Good weird?"

"Yes. Good weird", she nodded. "But seriously, we have to get up."

"Have you taken one sick day yet? Ever?", he asked, already knowing the answer.

"No. But I really should go in. I'm supposed to scrub in with Mark on—", Meredith began before Derek cut her off.

"Don't worry about Mark. I'll call the Chief. He won't mind", Derek said with a slight smile.

"Oh right, you can just tell him you and your new fiancé, AKA me, want to stay in bed and have sex all day. He won't have a problem with that", Meredith said sarcastically.

"Cranky?", he joked.

"No, not cranky. Just tired", she yawned.

"Which is why we're staying here", he insisted.

"Der", she whined.

"Stop", he laughed as he reached over to get the phone off the nightstand.

"What are you going to tell him?"

"I'll just tell him we need a personal day, that's all. He won't ask questions. I don't have anything scheduled for today anyway."

"Ugh, fine. But if you get me in trouble…", she grumbled into his chest.

"I wouldn't do that", he said as he dialed the hospital. Thankfully, Patricia answered and Derek didn't have to explain himself to Richard. "All settled", he told her as he returned the phone to the nightstand.

"Mmm. Thank you", she said with a sigh.

"Aren't you glad you have me?", he asked, pulling the blankets snugly over their bodies.

"I guess", she yawned.

"You guess?", he asked amusedly.

"Fine, yes. Now, we're sleeping. All day", she told him, pressing her body closer to his.

Derek wrapped his arm around her and kissed her softly. "Love you", he whispered.

"Love you too", she mumbled sleepily before falling back asleep.

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"Mer. Baby wake up", Derek said softly as he gently nudged her.

"No. And don't call me baby", she grumbled, pulling the covers around herself tighter.

Derek chuckled softly. "It's ten o'clock. And I wanted to take you out to breakfast."

Meredith opened one eye to look at him. "Don't bribe me. Bribing me with food isn't nice, especially when I want to sleep."

"We can go wherever you want."

"Can we get it delivered?", she asked, her voice sounding muffled in the pillow.

"We're not in a hotel", he laughed. "Come on. Up.", he said as he pulled the covers away from her face.

"You suck", she said frankly as she looked him in the eyes.

"You love me", he said with a knowing nod. "Admit it."

"Fine. I love you", she sighed, sitting up. "And I'm still naked."

"Yes. You are", he laughed.

"Maybe we could do something…maybe in the shower…the thing…the bendy thing?", she asked with a smile, knowing he wouldn't say no.

"I guess we could", he grinned. "But we have to do it fast. We have things to do today", he said as he scooped her up and walked across the hallway with her in his arms.

"Der!", she yelled. He put her down and locked the door. "You're lucky no one is home."

"You're the one who's naked. That makes you the lucky one", he said as he wrapped his arms around her tiny waist and kissed her softly.

"Clothes off. Now", she told him as she pulled back and turned on the shower.

"I can't wait to marry you", he smiled. "It's going to be fun."

"Don't think I'm doing this every day. The bendy thing is only for special occasions", she reminded him.

"Then I guess we'll just have to make every day special", he said with a shrug, pulling his boxers off and stepping into the shower after her.

"I guess so", Meredith said as she pressed her lips against his, the hot water spraying down on them as they once again got lost in the hazy fog of their passion.

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"That was a nice morning wake-me-up", Derek laughed as they were getting dressed after their shower.

"Are you kidding? I'm ready for a nap", she giggled, collapsing on top of the bed closing her eyes.

"No, no more naps. We have plans today", he said as he easily scooped her up into his lap.

"Breakfast won't take all day", Meredith said, her arms wrapped around his neck.

"You need a ring", he said with a smile.

"Oh…right…ring…yeah, I guess", she said, biting her lip.

"Mer."

"Hmm?"

"What's wrong?", he asked, tilting his head in a way that made her heart melt for him.

Meredith blushed. "I just…I guess I'm still a little in shock", she said quietly.

"Me too", he smiled.

"Why…I mean, not that I…I'm happy…but why did you ask me last night?", she asked with a slight smile.

He shrugged. "I was going to do it eventually. Last night just seemed like the right time."

"Mmm", Meredith smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too", he said, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder, still sitting on his lap. "Do we really have to leave the house today?"

"Yes", he laughed. "I got you the day off. And did the bendy thing. The least you can do is pick out your engagement ring."

Meredith let out a dramatic sigh. "Fine."

"Where did you want to go to eat?", he asked.

"Remember that place we went to a long time ago, with the fountain? The outdoor place? Could we go there?"

"Where we went when you decided to go out with me?", he smiled, kissing her on the cheek.

"You just didn't want me eating left over grilled cheese", Meredith giggled.

"I can't even believe you would eat that", he said as they got up and headed downstairs.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't cook. And don't expect me to cook for you when we're married." Meredith paused. Okay, that sounded weird", she said as they got into the car.

"What?"

"Saying that."

"Get used to it", he laughed as the two made the short drive to the café.

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"What kind of ring do you want?", Derek asked after they had been seated and ordered their breakfast.

Meredith looked up at him. "Oh...uh…I guess I diamond one?"

"I would hope so", he laughed. "Do you know what band or cut you want?"

"Oh…I really don't know anything about rings. I guess I'll just look around once we get there."

"Okay", Derek smiled as he took her hand in his own.

A married couple with a baby took their seats at a table next to them. Meredith's eyes lit up when she saw the little girl. "Aww. Derek, isn't she adorable?", Meredith whispered.

"She is", Derek agreed with a smile.

Meredith waved to her, and the giggling baby waved back. Derek just looked at Meredith, a confused expression on his face.

"What?", Meredith asked when she noticed him staring at her.

"I just…nothing", he smiled, shaking his head.

"Derek."

"You're amazed by that baby", he laughed.

"No I'm not. I just…she's cute…I like babies", Meredith shrugged.

"Meredith Grey, I'm in love with you", Derek smiled sincerely.

"Because I like babies?", Meredith asked dryly.

Derek laughed. "Because you're just as giggly and excited as the baby is."

"Shut up." She playfully smacked him on the arm.

"It's true."

As they sat at their table and ate their breakfast together, Derek couldn't help but smile at Meredith. First, she had agreed to marry him, and now they were going to buy an engagement ring. And she was completely in awe over the baby seated near them.

After they were finished eating, they made their way to the jewelry store. "What one are you taking me to?", Meredith asked.

"The one downtown. I hear they have a big selection."

"We don't have to go anywhere fancy", Meredith told him.

"I'm not getting you something cheap from a bubblegum machine, Meredith. I want you to have the best ring out there."

Meredith laughed. "Okay."

"What?"

"You", she continued to laugh. "You're just so…"

"So what?"

"I don't know. I just…I love you." She put her hand on his thigh and smiled at him.

"I love you too."

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"Holy crap, Derek. This place is huge", Meredith said in awe as she looked around. It seemed as though the cases full of potential engagement rings went on for a mile.

"I told you", he joked.

"Derek…I", Meredith stammered, suddenly overwhelmed by the immensity of the store. Before she could say anything more, they were approached by an employee.

"Hi, I'm Kristen. Can I help you with anything today?", she asked in a pleasant tone.

"I um…need an engagement ring", Meredith told her with a weak smile.

"Right this way", she told them. Derek quickly took Meredith's hand and squeezed it gently as they followed her.

Kristen led them in the direction of various cases. "You're welcome to look. If you see anything you like, let me know."

"Okay. Thank you", Derek smiled.

Meredith walked over to the first case and peered down into it. "Wow…I didn't realize there were so many things to pick from", she said, biting her lip.

"You'll find one, I promise", he assured her.

After several minutes, Meredith looked at Derek. "What one do you like?"

"Mer, the ring isn't for me. I'll like whatever one you pick", he smiled.

"I need help."

Derek laughed. "Okay. Well, do you know what kind of diamond you like?"

"I think I like these pear shaped ones", she told him.

"Okay. That's a good start. Do you know what kind of band? Gold, silver, platinum…?"

"Maybe platinum?"

"Do you want to see some samples?"

"Yeah", Meredith nodded.

Derek quickly found Kristen, who pulled every pear shaped diamond in the case and lead them to a table. "You can take a seat if you'd like", she smiled.

"Okay", they said as they sat in the two empty chairs.

"There are a few different kinds. Some are more pointed and some are rounded. Which do you like more?", she asked Meredith.

"The round", Meredith said with a nod.

"Okay then. What type of band?", she asked.

Meredith looked at Derek. "I think I like platinum. Do you like that Der?"

Derek smiled at her. "It's up to you, Mer. But yes, I like that."

"Okay. I'll go with platinum I guess."

"Great. These are a few samples. But if you don't like any of these, we'd be happy to special order one. You can think it over." She stood up and gave them some privacy.

"Do you see one you like?", he asked.

"Hmm…", Meredith said as she examined each of the rings closely. "Oh, Der. This one", she gasped.

Derek smiled at her. "I love it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Meredith's smile quickly disappeared when she noticed the price. "Crap. Never mind."

"Why? What's wrong?", he asked, a look of concern on his face.

"It's almost eighteen thousand dollars, Derek! No, I'll find another one."

"No. We're getting this one. I don't care about the price. It could cost a million dollars and I'd still get it for you", he said with a nod.

"Derek, no", Meredith insisted.

"Yes. I saw your face when you saw this one. I'm not taking that away from you", he said taking her hand.

"Der", she pouted.

"Meredith", he teased.

Meredith let out a heavy sigh. "It's too expensive. I can find another one, Derek. It's really not a big deal. Look, this one looks like it. I'll get this one instead", she said, showing Derek a different ring.

"Meredith."

"What?"

"Stop talking", he said with a smile before kissing her softly. "We'll take this one", he said as Kristen approached them.

"Okay, great. Let me just measure you're finger and then I'll have it made for you", Kristen told them.

"You can make it now?", Meredith asked.

"Absolutely", she said as she reached for Meredith's left hand and sized her ring finger. "I think you're a size five and a half. How does that feel?"

"Good", Meredith said with a nod as she wiggled her finger around just to make sure.

"Okay. I'll be back in a few minutes", Kristen told them as she gathered up the rings and placed them back in the case.

"Thank you, Derek", Meredith said genuinely. "I appreciate it."

Derek kissed her forehead. "I love you. And you don't have to thank me."

After Derek paid, Kristen returned with Meredith's ring. "All set. Try it on first to make sure it fits."

Meredith quickly tried it on and put it back in the box. "Yep. It's fits perfectly", she told her, knowing Derek would want to be the one to officially put it on her finger.

"Great", Kristen smiled. "And congratulations. We hope to see you in the future."

"Thanks", they said in unison as they made their way out of the store.

"I can't believe you just spent eighteen thousand dollars", Meredith scolded, trying to hide her obvious excitement over buying her engagement ring.

Derek shrugged. "It's worth it", he said as they got into the car. "So, where to next? We have the whole day."

Meredith bit her lip. "I um…we could…I didn't see the land yet."

"You want to see it?", Derek asked, his blue eyes shone with excitement.

"Yeah", she said softly. "I mean, we're going to live there eventually. And, you know, raise our…", she paused. "I just wanted to see it."

Derek's heart swelled with love for her. _Raise our kids_. That's what she was going to say. "Yeah, sure", he smiled. "And the word you're looking for is kids, right?"

"I uh…well, I guess…I mean I'm not saying right now but…yeah", she breathed.

Derek looked over and smiled. "Just making sure."

When they finally made their way out to the land, Derek parked the car. "It's just a short walk in that direction", he pointed.

"You mean it's not here, where the trailer is? I…how much land do you seriously own?", Meredith asked in surprise.

Derek shrugged. "I thought about building it here. But I thought you'd like the view from the top of the hill more. I can't wait until you see it", he said excitedly, taking her hand and leading them in the right direction.

"Did you say hill? And…wait…you're building it there just for me?"

"Yeah. Of course."

"I….Derek", she said, clearly touched.

"Hmm?"

Meredith smiled at him. "Nothing."

When they reached the top of the hill, Derek smiled. "Here we are."

"Derek", she gasped. "Oh my God."

"Do you like it?"

Meredith took in her surroundings. From the hill she could see the vast expanse of Seattle as well as the bay and the ferryboats. "Derek", she repeated quietly, tears forming in her eyes.

Derek wrapped his arm around her, kissing her softly on the cheek. "Nice view, huh?", he smiled.

"Yeah", she gasped. "Are you…is this…we're seriously going to have house _right here_?"

"Just say the word. And we'll have a house right here", he said, taking her hand.

"I love it", she said softly, tears now free flowing down her face.

"We're doing this then?"

"Yeah, we're doing this", she said with a small nod.

Derek reached into his pocket and pulling out the tiny ring box. He got down one knee, thankful that it was one of those rare sunny days in Seattle. "Meredith", he said after clearing his throat.

Meredith looked down at him, directly into his blue eyes, suddenly overcome with love and joy.

"Meredith, every time I look at you, I can't even believe how much I love you. You're the love of my life, and you always will be. You are my future, my purpose in life. I love you so much." He paused, wiping away the tears escaping his eyes. "Meredith, will you marry me?"

"Yes", she said immediately, smiling despite her tears. She watching in amazement as Derek took her hand and put the ring on her finger. Her entire body erupted into chills as she tried to process the moment. _Me. Meredith Grey. The one that never thought she'd have a happily ever after. And yet here I am, the love of my life down on one knee, putting a ring on my finger while I stand in the spot where our house will be. A house that we'll live in together with our children. For the first time in my life, I have complete faith. _"I love you", she said as he stood up to come face to face with her.

"I love you too." Derek placed his hands on either side of her face and captured her lips with his. When they eventually parted, Derek wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead.

Meredith returned the embrace, pressing her body as close to his as possible. They both stood in silence, overlooking Seattle, knowing this would be the view they would wake up to every morning for the rest of their lives.

**Please review. :)**


	9. Being A Couple

**Disclaimer: Don't own it. I just wish I did.**

**Thanks for the reviews! This picks up the next day.**

After spending the night at the trailer, Derek and Meredith drove into work the next morning.

"Hey. You okay?", Derek asked, taking her hand in his.

"Oh. Yeah. I'm just nervous about how I'm going to break the news to everybody", Meredith said softly while twisting the new engagement ring on her finger.

"It'll be fine. They'll be happy for you", Derek assured her.

"I know…I just…this is a big step…but it'll be fine", Meredith said with a nod.

"Did you want me to tell Richard?"

"Yeah that's good I guess. I'm more scared about Bailey's reaction", Meredith giggled nervously.

"She'll be happy for us. Nothing is going to change. I promise." He gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

Meredith let out a breath. "Okay. So…I'm off at eight. When are you done?"

"Eight.", he said with a smile. "What did you want to do tonight?"

"We could just hang out at the house. I think Izzie and Alex are on call, so we'll have it all to ourselves."

"Hmm, I'm sure we could find some form of entertainment", he said as they pulled into the parking lot. 

"Not until you cook for me", Meredith smiled.

"Is that all I'm good for? Sex and cooking?", he teased.

"You clean too."

"You're so mean to me", he said as they walked into the hospital hand in hand.

"I'm kidding. I love you", she said before kissing him softly. "So I'll see meet you in the lobby at eight."

"Okay. Love you too", he said as she stepped onto the elevator and headed to the residents' lounge.

"Hey. Where were you yesterday? Were you sick?", Cristina asked immediately.

"No. Derek and I just took the day off", Meredith said with a shrug.

"He's ruining you."

Meredith laughed. "No he's not. I just…I was tired."

"Ah, so the beast _was_ fed", Cristina said with a knowing nod.

"Shut up. And yes, it was", Meredith giggled, careful to not reveal the ring on her finger as she changed into her scrubs.

The two walked out of the lounge and met up with Izzie, George, Alex, and Lexie in the hallway.

"Hey. Where were you yesterday?", Izzie asked.

"Oh…I just used a sick day. I was tired", Meredith explained quickly, rocking back and forth on the heels of her feet.

"You're all jumpy and nervous", Alex pointed out. "What the hell's going on?"

Meredith let out a deep breath and removed her left hand from her white coat. "I um…", she said nervously.

"You got engaged? Oh my God! Meredith!", Izzie shrieked, taking Meredith's hand in her own to admire the ring on Meredith's finger.

"Seriously?", Cristina asked in surprise.

"Yeah. It was…unexpected. I'm still a little shocked by it", Meredith laughed.

"Congratulations", Lexie said with a genuine smile.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, congrats Mer. We're so happy for you", George said, hugging her softly. The others followed suit, all giving Meredith congratulatory hugs.

"So how are you? Are you…okay?", Izzie asked.

"Yeah. I am actually. I'm really happy", Meredith smiled.

"How did he do it?", Lexie asked curiously.

"He…we were looking at the house plans he had drawn up, and I just…I don't know. It was weird. We kind of got caught up in the moment and he just asked me. I think he even surprised himself", Meredith laughed. "But I said yes. And I feel good about it."

"Feel good about what?", Bailey asked as she walked up behind them, dropping off charts at the nurses' station.

"Oh, Dr. Bailey. Hi. I um…I got…engaged", Meredith said meekly.

Bailey simply smiled at her. "Congratulation, Grey." She took Meredith's hand in her own. "It's a beautiful ring."

"Thank you", Meredith smiled.

"So is Shepherd walking around the hospital gloating about it?", Bailey joked.

"Yeah, probably", Meredith said shaking her head.

"I'm happy for you two", she said with a sincere smile.

"Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"How's Tuck doing?", Alex asked.

"He's doing much better. Off all the meds and eating on his own", Bailey said with a smile.

"That's good", George said with a nod. "Congratulations."

"Thank you. Now get to work, all of you", Bailey said firmly but kindly. Even though she wasn't technically in charge of them anymore, they still listened to her every word. Bailey chuckled softly to herself as they scurried down the hallway.

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After his surgery, Derek knocked on the Chief's door. "Chief?"

"Come in", Richard said politely. "Oh, Derek. It's good to see you. How are you?"

"I'm fine, how are you?"

"Good. So, are you and Grey okay? You weren't in work yesterday."

"Yeah, we're fine. Actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about", Derek admitted quietly.

"Oh, well okay", Richard said kindly.

"Meredith and I…we got engaged", Derek said with a small smile.

"Congratulations, Derek. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks", Derek said sincerely.

"Thank you, Derek. Thank you for making her happy…I…it means a lot to me."

Derek gave an understanding nod. "I love her, Richard. I love her more than I ever thought it was possible to love a person. She's just…I love her so much", he said with a smile, tears pricking in his eyes.

"I know you do, Derek. And thank you for telling me about the engagement. I appreciate it", Richard said as he and Derek stood up and gave each other a hug.

"You're welcome", Derek said as they pulled back.

The men said their goodbyes and Derek left his office. 

"Hey, man. What's up? Where were you and Grey yesterday?", Mark asked as the two made their way to the coffee cart.

"Hey, Mark. Yeah, uh…Meredith and I are…we got engaged", he said with a smile.

"Congratulations, Derek", Mark said, pulling his friend in for a hug.

"Thanks", Derek said with a nod.

"Am I the best man?"

"I don't know if we're getting married anytime soon. But…yeah. I guess you're the best man."

"Seriously? I thought for sure you'd say no."

"Well, until a better candidate comes along, you're in", Derek joked. "But I swear—you sleep with her and I will kill you."

"You have my word. Besides, Grey is like my little sister. That would be awkward", Mark laughed.

"Yeah, probably", Derek agreed as they paid for their coffee and headed toward the nurses' station. 

"Did Mer freak out when you asked her?"

"Actually she didn't", Derek laughed. "I wasn't planning on asking her. It just sort of came out. But she said yes, so I couldn't have planned it any better."

"I guess the answer is all that matters", Mark joked.

"Yeah", Derek laughed. "I guess so."

"I have to go scrub in. Talk to you later, man", Mark said, patting Derek on the shoulder before heading toward the OR.

"Alright, see you later." Derek took a seat at the nurses' station to fill out his charts. Luckily, his shift was ending in an hour, and he'd be able to spend a relaxing night at home with Meredith.

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"Hey, Meredith", Lexie said as she caught up to Meredith in the hallway.

"Oh, hey Lexie. What's up? You okay?", Meredith asked with a small smile.

"Yeah. Um…actually, I had a favor to ask", Lexie said nervously.

"Okay…"

"Molly and Eric are in town with Laura. You know, our niece", Lexie said plainly.

"Oh, I um…yeah", Meredith said, a little surprised that Lexie referred to the baby as Meredith's niece. This whole sister thing was actually turning out okay, but it still felt a little weird, considering she was still getting used to the idea.

"Anyway, um, we're taking dad to a rehab facility. I'm moving out of the house soon, and I can't leave him by himself. So until he gets himself straightened out, we're putting him in rehab."

"Oh…okay", Meredith said, somewhat curious as to where this conversation was heading. Lexie knew that Meredith and Thatcher weren't close, and the news didn't directly concern Meredith in any way.

"So, he's probably going to be difficult. I mean, we told him about it. Sometimes he agrees with it, other times he's angry. So we don't really know what to expect. That's why Molly and Eric are here…we're taking him there together."

"Oh."

"So um, I know it's sort of short notice, but I was wondering if you and Derek wouldn't mind watching the baby for a few hours tomorrow", Lexie asked, nervously biting her lip, a habit she and Meredith had in common.

Meredith's eyes got wide with panic. "Oh, I don't…I've never…", she stammered.

"I know…I'm sorry to ask, but Molly didn't want Laura to be there. She was worried so I told her I'd ask you. She said that you were her doctor when the baby was born…she said my mom really liked you", Lexie said with a sad smile.

"I don't have a problem with it…I just…I've never…you guys trust me with the baby?"

Lexie shrugged. "You're our sister. Of course we trust you."

Meredith was taken aback by the sister comment. She hadn't really gotten used to the idea of sisters yet, mostly because she never expected to have any. Meredith smiled, "Uh…yeah…sure. I'll do it. And I'll have Derek there, so it'll be fine."

"Really? If you two had plans...I know tomorrow is Saturday, and you both have off…"

"No, we didn't. Really, it's not a problem", Meredith assured her.

"Thank you, Meredith. This means a lot to us", Lexie smiled, hugging Meredith slightly.

"Yeah…it'll be…we'll take good care of her. So, when were you guys going to drop her off?"

"Probably around noon, if that's okay. And I don't really know when we'll be back…knowing dad, he'll be…a pain in the ass", Lexie said, already dreading the task ahead of her.

"It's okay. You guys do whatever you have to do. We'll be fine."

"Thank you so much, Mer. I just…you're a life saver. Thank you", Lexie smiled, soon interrupted by the sound of her pager. "Crap. I have to go. Thanks again, Meredith."

"Yeah…you're welcome", Meredith said as Lexie turned as headed for the elevator. _Crap. What the hell did I just get myself into_, Meredith thought as she brushed a few stray strands of hair out of her face. She walked to the resident lounge, thankful that her shift was over. Now all she had to do was talk to Derek.

After she got changed out of her scrubs, she took the elevator down to the lobby. "Hey", she said as she saw the unmistakable curls on the back of Derek's head. 

He turned around and smiled. "Hey. Ready to go?", he asked, reaching out for her hand.

"Yeah", she said, taking his hand in her own as the two made their way out of the hospital together.

"How were your friends?"

Meredith laughed. "They were excited. Even Cristina hugged me, sort of."

"Good day then?"

"Yes, good day. Did you tell the Chief?"

"Yeah. He's happy. I don't think I've ever seen him that happy", Derek joked.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. He does care about you, Meredith", Derek said as they got into the car.

Meredith just smiled and nodded. "So, I hope you weren't planning on doing anything tomorrow."

"No…why?", Derek asked curiously. 

"We're babysitting."

"Babysitting? Who?"

"Remember Molly, Lexie's sister? And my…sister…I guess. I don't know. Anyway, she had a baby a few months ago, and I volunteered us to watch her", Meredith said, biting her lip.

"Seriously?", Derek asked with a smile.

"Yes. Why?"

"I just…that's very…sisterly."

"Well, apparently, Laura—that's her name by the way—apparently, she's my niece."

"Ah, so that would make you Aunt Meredith", Derek grinned.

"Yeah, well, if that makes me Aunt Meredith, you're Uncle Derek…or you will be one day."

"I'm already Uncle Derek in case you've forgotten, and you're going to be Aunt Meredith one day, too", Derek reminded her.

"Oh, yeah. I…there's fourteen of them right? That should be fun…" Meredith said nervously.

"Relax, Meredith. You're going to be a good aunt. You volunteered to babysit your niece. That's a start, right?"

"I uh…yeah, I guess."

"So why exactly are we babysitting?"

"Tomorrow they're putting Thatcher in a rehab…whatever. Lexie's moving out, and it's dangerous for him to be there by himself", Meredith explained.

"Oh", Derek said quietly. He decided it was best to drop the subject, knowing Meredith was uncomfortable discussing her father. "So, we're playing parents for a day? I'm actually excited. It's going to be fun."

Meredith looked over at him and smiled. "Yeah, I guess we are."

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"What did you make for me?", Meredith asked sweetly as she walked into the kitchen in her pajamas, her hair still wet from her shower.

"Spaghetti and meatballs", he said with a smile as he put some on a plate for her.

Meredith walked over and wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you", she said before kissing him softly and pouring drinks for them.

"My pleasure", he grinned. "So, what did you want to do with the baby tomorrow?"

"I uh…I have no idea. That's your thing."

"What do you mean 'my thing'?"

"You know…the uncle stuff…playing with them, changing diapers…"

"You're changing the diapers", Derek laughed.

"That falls under the uncle role."

"Aunts change diapers too", Derek teased.

"Fine", Meredith sighed. "I'll try."

"Good", Derek laughed. "We're both going to need practice anyway."

"I uh…yeah", Meredith said nervously.

"I didn't mean to freak you out, Mer. I'm just saying…you know, one day we'll be doing this for real."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "I know. But not for a while. I want us to get married and have the house first."

"Me too", Derek smiled.

"But eventually…yeah, I want to do this for real", Meredith breathed.

"Good", Derek smiled. "And practicing for a baby is going to be fun."

"Mhm. We're already good at practicing", Meredith giggled.

"True. But lots of practice can't hurt", Derek grinned.

"I guess not…so, I was thinking you could call the contractor soon, you know, just to get a head start…I mean, if that's okay."

"We can wait a while. It's no big deal", Derek assured her.

"We're going to have to build it eventually. We may as well just do it now. It won't be finished for a while anyway", Meredith said with a shrug.

"You're really okay with all of this? I don't want to rush you. We can wait if you want", he said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as they ate at the island together.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I'm okay. I promise. I'm all for building it…under one condition."

"What's that?"

"I want balcony…you know, attached to our bedroom."

"I like that", Derek smiled. 

"And a huge bathroom, with a big shower and a big bathtub."

"As long as we can have sex in both of them."

"Deal", Meredith giggled. "By the way, did you ever call your family…to tell them you got engaged to some mystery woman?"

"Nancy met you."

"Yeah, that went well", Meredith said sarcastically. "But seriously, I want you to call."

"I will. They'll all want to meet you before the wedding anyway."

"Oh…yeah. I guess…I guess that makes sense", Meredith stammered.

"Relax, Mer. It'll be fine. I'll call over the weekend." Derek noticed her nervousness and smiled. "Meredith."

"Hmm?"

"I love you. And they'll love you too. I promise", he said, kissing her softly.

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

After dinner, they just sat on the couch and watched television, sharing a pint of ice cream. "We're so boring now", Meredith giggled.

"Yeah. I guess we are. But I like boring", Derek said with a smile.

"Me too. I just…it feels like we never got a chance to do this stuff before…the couple stuff. I like it."

Derek kissed the top of her head. "I like it too."

Meredith snuggled into Derek's chest and he tucked the blanket around them. The two fell into a comfortable silence and watched the made-for-TV movie for a while. Eventually, Derek heard the familiar snoring coming from her nose, the vibrations tickling his chest. He replaced his body with some pillows and snuck upstairs to take a shower.

When he returned, Meredith was in the same position on the couch under the blanket. He chuckled softly before easily scooping her up in his arms and carrying her upstairs.

He gently put her under the covers before climbing in next to her. Derek wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close to him.

"Love you", Meredith mumbled sleepily into his chest.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "I love you too."

**Fluffy enough? Hehe.**

**So, I decided to put Thatcher in rehab. He probably doesn't deserve help, but it was more for Lexie's benefit. Now she can move out and not feel so guilty knowing she's helping him but also living her own life. I'm a fixer. :)**

**I know it's sort of unrealistic that Meredith and Derek would babysit Laura, but I thought it sort of worked. I think it would be so cute to see them experience a baby, even if it's just for a day. A MerDer baby is my dream…**

**Reviews make me happy. Hopefully I'll have the next chapter up soon. That's when they'll babysit. :)**


	10. Babysitters

**Disclaimer: If Grey's was mine, Meredith and Derek would have been happy and together by now. **

**I have no idea how old the baby is. With the Grey's timeline, she could be two weeks or two years old. I guess in this she's probably eight months old. Also, I don't know the current month on the show. I'm guessing it's early December-ish? Maybe? That's sort of important in this chapter. Rambling done.**

"They should be here soon", Meredith said, making sure the house was clean. She didn't want her half-sister or half-brother-in-law to think she was slob. Not that she was though. Meredith always made it a point to keep the house clean and neat. She was just being paranoid.

Derek walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "I think the house is clean, Meredith", he laughed.

"Okay", Meredith sighed, dropping down onto the couch. "We can't take our eyes off of her. Nothing is really baby-proofed."

"We won't. It'll be fine", Derek assured her, kissing her on the cheek.

When they heard the doorbell, Meredith quickly jumped off the couch and made her way to the door, Derek by her side.

"Hey Lexie. Hi Molly…and Eric, right? I'm Meredith. This is Derek, my boyf—fiancé. Nice to meet you", Meredith said with a smile, extending her hand.

"Hi, Meredith, Derek. Nice to meet you both", Eric said warmly.

"And this is Laura", Lexie said, holding the baby in her arms.

"Hi, Laura", Meredith said sweetly. She couldn't help but notice that Laura looked just like her when she was a baby.

They went into the living room and talked for a while. They told Meredith and Derek that Laura could say a few words, but most of it was still baby babbling. She could crawl, but she stayed out of trouble. They told them what she ate and when, and some of her favorite things to play. By the time they left, Meredith felt a lot more at ease. Molly and Eric were nice and friendly. Meredith smiled, feeling happy that she actually had some decent relatives. Maybe this whole family thing would work after all.

"So, we should be back in a few hours. I'll be sure to call", Lexie said as she handed the baby over to Meredith. "Meredith is going to take you now, okay?", Lexie said in a happy baby voice.

"If you have any questions, don't hesitate to call", Molly reminded them.

"Okay", Derek smiled. "It'll be fun. Don't worry."

"Wish I could say the same", Lexie sighed.

"I…good luck, guys. You're doing the right thing", Meredith said with a weak smile as the baby played with her hair.

"Thanks", Molly sighed. "And thanks again for watching her."

"We really appreciate it", Eric said with a smile.

"No problem", Meredith said, shaking her head.

"Lex", the baby said, reaching out her hand.

"Aunt Lexie will be back soon, okay princess?", Lexie said, kissing the baby on the cheek.

After they said their goodbyes, Meredith and Derek headed back into the living room with the baby. "So far, so good", Meredith sighed. "I thought for sure she'd cry when they left."

"She seems like a happy baby. Aren't you, Laura?", Derek asked happily, taking the baby from Meredith's arms.

Derek tickled her stomach, causing the baby to break out into a fit of giggles. "She sounds like you when she laughs", he said with a smile.

"She looks like me too when I was a baby…it's kind of weird."

"She has your hair and eye color. Definitely your niece", Derek pointed out.

"Yeah. I guess", Meredith said with a small smile.

Meredith and Derek sat on the floor with the baby, still in Derek's arms. She began pointing at Meredith and smiling. "Here you go", Derek said, handing the baby over to Meredith.

"Babysitting is sort of easy."

"It is when the baby is well-behaved. My nephews…not so easy."

Meredith laughed. "I only babysat my neighbors' kids when I was in high school, but they were older. All I did was sit there."

"Sort of like what we're doing now?", Derek joked.

"Pretty much."

Laura began getting antsy after sitting in Meredith's lap for a few minutes. "Did you want to crawl?", she asked in a baby voice. She put the baby on the floor, and she instantly began crawling around the room. Meredith and Derek just leaned against the couch and let her crawl around the room, keeping a careful watch on her. "I think we should feed her soon", Derek said, looking at his watch.

"Yeah, okay", Meredith said with a smile. "I'll go get the bag thing."

"Diaper bag", Derek corrected.

"Don't make fun of me", Meredith laughed. "I've never done this before."

"Sorry", Derek smiled as he picked up the baby and walked into the kitchen.

As Meredith rummaged through the diaper bag to find the jar of baby food, she couldn't help but watch Derek with the baby. He looked so natural holding her. There was no doubt in Meredith's mind that Derek would be an amazing father.

"Find it yet?", Derek laughed, watching Meredith stare at them with a small smile on her face.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry", Meredith said, handing him he jar and the baby spoon.

"Here. You hold her and I'll feed her", Derek said, sitting the baby on Meredith's lap.

"I want to feed her too."

"We'll take turns", Derek said as he opened the jar. He dipped the spoon in, scooping out some peachy gunk. "Mmm", he said as he attempted to give the baby a spoonful.

"She's not eating it", Meredith frowned.

"Would you eat it?", Derek joked.

"Derek, she has to eat. Maybe you should show her that it's good."

"Why me?"

"Because, she's looking at you. Here, just a spoonful. And make sure you smile", Meredith grinned.

"I expect sex later for this."

"Don't say s-e-x in front of her. Knowing my luck, she'll say it. Then go home and repeat it to her parents. Here", Meredith said, spooning the food into Derek's mouth. "Mmm, look Laura. It's so good."

Derek smiled, "Yeah. It's delicious", he said after swallowing it. "That was cruel, Meredith."

"Look, she's eating it though", Meredith said as the baby opened her mouth and took a spoonful. "Oh, here, you can do it", she said, handing him the spoon.

"No, you do it", Derek smiled. "You're doing a good job."

"Okay."

As Derek sat in the kitchen chair, all he could do was smile. Meredith definitely had maternal instincts. There was something about the way she spoke to the baby, and held her close that made Derek fall even more in love with her.

"Why are you looking at me?", Meredith giggled.

"You're just…really good with her" Derek smiled.

"It's not that hard to feed a baby."

"It can be. You're just a pro."

Meredith just laughed. "All done?", she asked Laura. "That man in the chair is going to hold you while I clean up."

"'That man in the chair'? Is that what you're calling me now?", Derek joked as he took the baby from Meredith's lap and held her so she was propped up in a sitting position on his arm.

'Uncle Derek sounds weird", Meredith giggled. "Almost as weird as Aunt Meredith."

"I think it sounds good. Aunt Meredith has a nice ring to it."

"Dith", the baby said in an obvious attempt to say Meredith.

"Yes, Laura, that is Aunt Meredith", Derek laughed.

"Fine. Aunt Meredith thinks Uncle Derek should change her diaper."

"She needs a bottle first."

"Crap. The bottle. You see, this is why I'm a terrible aunt." Meredith quickly got the premade bottle from the diaper bag and walked over to the stove. "You're supposed to put this in a pot, right?"

Derek laughed. "Want me to do it?"

"I can do it. Just tell me what to do."

"Put some hot water in the pot, then put the bottle in. It'll get warm in a few minutes."

"Okay." Meredith did what Derek told her. When she thought it felt warm, she took it from the pot. "I think it's ready."

"I'm proud", Derek smiled before kissing her on the forehead.

"Shut up", she giggled as they walked into the living room and sat on the couch.

"Did you want to feed her?", Derek asked.

"Yeah, okay."

Derek gently handed Laura over to Meredith, who immediately cradled her in her arms. She began feeding her as though she'd been doing it for years. Laura looked into Meredith's eyes as she drank her bottle. Meredith smiled, holding the baby close to her body.

"Look at you", Derek said softly.

"What?"

"You. You're just…in full mommy mode." Derek kissed her on the cheek.

Meredith smiled at him. "She's so cute, Derek."

"She is."

They fell into a comfortable silence, watching as the baby drank her bottle. When she finished, Meredith took the bottle from her mouth and handed it to Derek. "All finished? You're such a good eater", Meredith said in a cooing voice as she wiped the baby's mouth with her bib.

"Did you want to burp her?", Meredith asked with a smile.

"I'd love to", he said as Meredith handed the baby to him. Derek got up from the couch and gently propped her up over his shoulder, patting her back. He walked her back and forth across the room. Meredith just watched him, a small smile on her face. "I love you, Derek."

"I love you too", he said as she got up to kiss him softly.

"I'm going to wash out the bottle. I'll back in a minute." Meredith walked into the kitchen, not able to wipe the smile off her face. The more she saw Derek with the baby, the more she fell in love with him. Every so often when she glanced down at the ring on her finger, all she could do was stare. She never expected to fall in love. She had given up on the idea of love before she had ever experienced it. She wasn't even sure true love existed. Or if it did, she'd certainly never find it. Then she met Derek. The only person in her life that had ever loved her for her. With Derek, she could be herself. She didn't have to put on an act. And neither did he.

Every time she looked down at the ring, it amazed her. She found him. She found the love of her life without ever looking for him. Her Derek. With this thought, she smiled, her hands under the stream of water as she washed out the bottle. She didn't even hear Derek's footsteps as he entered the kitchen with the baby.

"Hey. You okay?"

Meredith snapped out of her happy trance. "Oh. Yeah. I'm fine", she smiled, turning off the water and drying out the bottle.

"She's all burped out. But I think she needs a diaper change."

"You think or you know?"

"I…know. Yeah, definitely", Derek said with a nod.

"Before we do this, you should know that I've never changed a diaper in my life", she said, grabbing the diaper bag and heading for the living room. "I don't know what we need, so I'm bringing the whole thing with us."

Derek just laughed as she spread out the little blanket down on the floor, along with a fresh diaper, diaper wipes, and powder. "Okay. All ready."

"This isn't surgery, Meredith. It's a diaper change", he laughed.

"Fine. Since you seem to have this under control, I guess I'll just watch", she shrugged.

"I don't think so", he chuckled. "You're helping."

Meredith sighed. "Fine."

Derek gently placed the baby on the floor before undoing the snaps on her onesie.

"This doesn't have any crotch snaps", Meredith pointed out. "Aren't they supposed to?"

"The one underneath this one does", Derek said as he carefully took the little pink onesie off. Laura began to get fussy and cry, clearly angry with Derek for making her cold.

"Derek, she's crying", Meredith said, rubbing her arm in an attempt to soothe her.

"It's okay, Laura. You're alright", Derek said, caressing the baby's cheek. She seemed to calm down momentarily, so Derek undid the crotch snaps and lifted it up over her belly.

"You want to help with this part?", Derek asked with a smile.

"What do I have to do?"

"I'll take the diaper off and you hold her legs up."

"Okay", Meredith said, getting ready to do as Derek told her.

Derek quickly took the diaper off and removed it from the baby's bottom. Laura started crying again, obviously not at all happy about the situation. "Shh, you're okay sweet pea. Almost done", Meredith said softly.

Derek got a few baby wipes and gently cleaned her up. Meredith put the fresh diaper under her and handed Derek the powder. He sprinkled some on her before fastening the diaper around the baby's waist. "All finished", Derek said with a smile. "Did you want to put her clothes back on while I clean up?"

"Yeah", Meredith said, readjusting the snaps and gently putting her back into her little pink outfit. "All done. You're such a good girl", she said softly, picking the baby up off the blanket and holding her close.

"We make a good team", Meredith said as she settled on the couch with Laura in her arms.

"Yes we do." After Derek cleaned up, he sat next to them on the couch. "What now?"

"I think she's sleepy. All of the diaper excitement wore her out. Maybe you should read her a story."

"Are there books in the bag?"

"Yeah."

Derek got the bag from the table and got the diaper bag. "Okay, we've got _The Three Little Pigs._"

"I hate that story."

"Or we have _Goodnight Moon_."

"That one's better. Der, can you get her blanket?"

Derek got the blanket out of the bag and together they wrapped it around the baby. He pulled them both close to him and began reading the story. Meredith wasn't paying attention to what he read, but rather the way he was reading it. He was changing the voices for each character and reading it with such expression that made Meredith giggle.

Derek paused. "What?", he laughed.

"You. You're just…its cute how you're reading it. Now continue, we're waiting", she said, pointing to the baby, whose eyes were fluttering to stay open.

"Okay", Derek laughed as he went on. By the time he was finished, Laura had fallen asleep in Meredith's arms. She was looking down at the baby with a smile on her face as she rubbed the baby's soft cheek with her finger.

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's shoulder and pulled her closer to him. "I love you", he said softly before kissing her cheek.

"Love you too." She rested her head on Derek's shoulder. They sat there for a while and watched the rise and fall of the sleeping baby's chest. They were lucky she was such a good baby. Meredith thought it would be chaotic, but the baby was perfectly content sleeping in her arms. The only sound in the room was the Laura quietly sucking her thumb, making little baby noises.

"I'd say we're pretty good babysitters."

"I think so", Meredith said with a smile. "I hope we can watch her again. She's just…I don't know. I kind of like the aunt thing."

"You're good at the aunt thing."

"You're good at the uncle thing."

"We're just a good team", Derek smiled, kissing her again.

"I guess we are", she agreed. Just then, the phone rang. "That's probably Lexie. Can you take her?"

"Yeah." Derek gently took the baby from Meredith's arms and cradled her in his own, careful not to wake her up. When Meredith returned, she came back and sat next to him. "She said everything went well with getting him there…which is…I don't know. But I told them to go out to dinner or something. Lexie never gets to see them, and…is that okay?"

"Sure. I don't mind", Derek said shaking his head.

"Okay. So they'll be here in an hour or so." Meredith snuggled next to him on the couch. "How long do babies normally sleep?"

"She'll probably be up soon. It's already been close to an hour."

A few minutes later, the baby's green eyes opened, her eyelids blinking to adjust to the light. "Hey, sleepyhead. You woke up", Derek said softly. "What did you want to do now?"

The baby just giggled at him. "Deh", she pointed.

"That's right, this is Derek. Do you want to play with us?", Meredith asked sweetly.

Laura lust laughed again. "I think that's a yes. What do babies like to play?"

"I hear peek-a-boo is popular in the two and under crowd", Derek laughed. So that's what they did. Laura seemed to enjoy it, laughing every time one of them "peeked" from behind their hands and tickled her belly. She broke into a fit of giggles when they both started tickling her at the same time.

Eventually, Laura began to get fussy again. "You hungry, pumpkin?", Meredith asked.

"I got it", Derek said as he walked into the kitchen and made the other bottle. When he returned, he gave the bottle to Meredith.

"You can do it this time." Meredith handed the baby to Derek.

As Derek fed her, Meredith felt her eyes fill with tears. A small smile came over her face.

"Hey, what's wrong?", Derek asked softly.

"Nothing, I just…you…you're so good with her and I…you want to be a dad", Meredith said as a single tear escaped her eye.

Derek smiled. "Of course I want to be a dad. You want to…"

"Yeah. I do." She wiped her cheek with the side of her hand. "I just…watching you with her…it's like everything falls into place. You're…I never thought I'd…and then I see you with the baby and I want that. I want that for us."

"You want a baby?", Derek asked cautiously, knowing this whole topic was new and somewhat scary to both of them.

"Yeah. I mean, not right now. There's things we have to do before…not yet. But eventually, yeah."

"Okay", Derek said, leaning in to kiss her softly. They were interrupted by a knock at the door. "They're here."

Meredith quickly wiped the tears off her face and answered the door and led them into the living room. "So um, how was it?"

"It was actually okay. Honestly, I think he did it for this little one", Molly said, referring to the baby.

"He asked where the baby was, and we told him she we didn't want her to see her grandpa this way. I think that got to him", Lexie admitted with a small smile.

"That's good", Meredith said softly. "And Laura was fine. I think we both fell in love with her."

"You're welcome to babysit whenever we're in town", Eric said with a nod.

"We'd love to watch her again", Derek smiled. "I don't think I've met seen such a well behaved baby."

"Oh, good. I was afraid she'd be fussy. We never have babysitters at home."

"Not at all", Derek said with a smile as he handed the baby to Lexie. "It was fun."

After they said their goodbyes, Meredith and Derek saw them out of the house. He wrapped his arms around Meredith's waist. "I love you."

"Mmm. Love you too", she mumbled into his chest, breathing in the scent that belonged solely to him.

"We're not done talking yet."

"Talking about what?"

"The baby thing. I know you wanted to talk about it, then they came."

"Oh…I um…yeah, okay", Meredith breathed. "But first, I'm hungry."

Derek laughed. "Okay. We'll eat, then talk."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

Later that night, after they were both showered and Meredith was fed, they finally settled into bed. "Okay. I…how do we do this?", she asked with a small smile.

Derek took her hand in his own. "We'll just talk."

"This is…it's a big thing. It's…okay", Meredith breathed. "I'm not going to freak out. My freak outs don't get us anywhere."

"No, they don't. But it's cute", he chuckled , kissing her cheek.

"I just…Der, this is…important."

"I know. I promise we'll make it through alive", he laughed.

"Okay", she breathed. "So, the first thing is the house. I…are you calling the contractors?"

"This week."

"Okay. That's good. So um, how long…I mean, I'm not in any rush to move out of here. But I was just wondering, how long does it take to do that…build a house?"

Derek shrugged. "I don't know. It depends on depends on a lot of things. Maybe a few months to a year, give or take?"

"I…okay. We should go over the blue prints with them too, just to be sure."

"We will."

"Okay. So", she breathed, still holding his hand. "Wedding."

"Wow, wasting no time. I like it", he laughed, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.

Meredith shrugged. "No more avoiding. My new motto."

"I'm proud", he said before kissing her softly.

"So, wedding. We've only been engaged for..." Meredith thought back. "…three days, but I want to have a plan here. No setting dates right now, but…ballpark."

"Up to you."

"I don't know. I um…" Meredith took a few moments to think this over. She had faith in Derek, more now than ever before. Just a month ago, she thought she'd be alone forever. And now she was engaged. It had all been a whirlwind, but for some reason, she trusted it completely. And today, seeing him with a baby, it was like a glimpse into their future. They weren't ready for a baby, but she knew that one day they would be. The thought scared her, and yet, her faith never faltered. Because she had Derek. And together, she knew they'd be okay.

"I…we're both in this, so…I mean…not that I'm saying we should go do it tomorrow, but I…" Meredith let out a breath, and looked straight into his eyes. "This is it for me, Derek. If we're doing this, it's forever. So, my point is…I'm ready for this. And I know its fast, but I'm not freaking out. And the fact that I'm not freaking out must mean something, right? Like, this is how it's supposed to be. So…I'm just going to trust it", she said with a confident nod.

"Okay", Derek said, a little surprised by all she had said. "I…that was…wow."

"Is wow a bad thing?", she asked, biting her lip.

"No." He leaned in and kissed her softly. "You, Meredith Grey, are amazing."

Meredith just rolled her eyes and smiled. "I want this, Derek. A life with _you_. And I'm done waiting for it. For the first time in my life, I'm completely happy. And I know I'll only ever be happy with you. I figured that out a long time ago. So…no more waiting."

"So then…"

"So", she interrupted. "Maybe in a few months. I don't know…July maybe? We both have two weeks off in July before the new residency year starts, so…maybe then?", she asked nervously.

"Yeah, okay", Derek said with a nod and a smile. "That sounds good."

"Are you sure?"

"Mhm", he said, pulling her in for a soft kiss.

After they parted, Meredith let out a deep breath. "Baby."

"Hmm?", Derek asked, a little stunned.

"I just…you we're so good with her today, and I…." Meredith's voice quivered as tears built up in her eyes. "Seeing you with a baby…you're going to be a good dad, Derek. And I don't know if I…"

He wiped away a few stray tears running down her face. "Meredith, you are not your mother. Don't ever think that you wouldn't be a good parent. You'll make an amazing mother. Today…you we're so…calm and loving and…I promise you, we can do this. When we're ready, we'll start a family, Meredith."

"I know but…how is this…how can we be good parents when we're always working? It's…I don't want nannies raising our kids, Derek. I want us to be the parents I never had. The ones that love their kids and tuck them in at night and know their favorite story…I just don't know if…"

"Meredith, I don't want you to worry about that. By then, you'll be further along in your residency, so we'll both have better schedules and more time off. Now it's rough, but it won't always be like that. And I promise you, no matter what, our kids will come first. Our family will be the main priority. Okay?", he asked softly, kissing her forehead and wrapping his arms around her.

Meredith relaxed into his touch and listened to his heartbeat. "I love you, Derek."

"I love you, too." He paused. "You want to know how I'm so sure you'll be a good mom?"

"How?", she sniffled.

"Because you already care about our kids, and they're not even here yet", he whispered, gently stroking her hair.

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. She actually felt better after hearing that. "And the practicing will be fun", she said with a giggle.

"I'm all for the practicing", Derek said as he tilted her chin up and kissed her softly.

"Want to practice now?"

"I would love to", he said with a smile. "And you owe me for the baby food anyway."

"I remember", she murmured, pressing her lips against his and tangling her fingers through his hair.

Derek rolled them over and pressed her into the pillows. Meredith wasted no time, quickly finding the bottom of his shirt with her fingers and pulling it off. After she tossed it on the floor, Derek began kissing and nipping at her neck and behind her ear. He abandoned those sensitive spots only momentarily to reach down and tug on her shirt. Meredith arched her back and he easily lifted it up over her head, never breaking their eye contact. The intense love and passion ever present as blue met green.

She put her palms on his shoulders and pulled him down to her. "I love you", he said softly before kissing her again. Meredith let out a moan when his tongue brushed her bottom lip. She granted him entrance into her mouth and their tongues met in a fury. Derek reached behind her and unclasped her bra, slowly pulling the lace material down her arms, all the while keeping his lips pressed firmly against hers. After he pulled it off and dropped it to the floor, he planted one last kiss on her lips before trailing his tongue down her neck and collarbone.

When he reached her breasts, Meredith gasped. "Der", she said, clutching onto his hair while he worked magic on her breasts, gently sucking on one of her nipples before giving the same attention to the other one. His touch along with the feeling of his arousal pressing against the confines of his pants sent shockwaves right to her core, making her tremble beneath him.

Derek wanted to give her the most pleasure possible. He took his mouth off her breasts, despite her moaning protests. But when she felt him hook his fingers in both her pajama pants and panties, she erupted into goose bumps. Derek slowly slid them down her legs and pulled them off of her body. He gently spread her apart for him and she easily complied, opening herself even more to his touch. Derek pecked kisses up her inner thighs to her belly button before moving up the length of her body to kiss her again.

Derek looked straight into her green orbs as he gently eased two fingers into her wet center, making her writhe and buck her hips beneath him. "Oh Der. I'm…oh", she moaned as he slid his fingers in and out of her. "Harder." Derek obeyed and began thrusting his fingers harder into her. "That's it. Come for me, Meredith", he whispered into her ear when he felt her clamp down around his fingers. "Derek, I'm…oh god…Der", she panted as her strong orgasm hit her, sending wild contractions through her body as she bucked her hips into his fingers, which were still moving inside of her. With his other hand, Derek laced their fingers, wanting her to know just how much he loved her. When she finally came down from her high, Derek gently removed his fingers from her and kissed her again. "I love you, Mer."

"I love you too", Meredith panted, still out of breath. "Der…I…please", she begged, grasping at the waistband of his pants in an attempt to take them off. With Derek's help, Meredith managed to kick the pants and boxer down his legs, letting them fall to a puddle on the floor. Meredith grabbed his ass in her hands and pulled her toward him. He returned his attention to her breasts, alternately nipping and sucking on them. All Meredith could do was lay her head back on the pillow and enjoy the sensations taking over her body.

She felt the head of his manhood gently ease into her, but neither tried to thrust, letting it happen naturally. Eventually she found herself completely full of him, spreading her legs even farther in order to take him deeper inside, as deep as he could go. After a few moments of letting Meredith accommodate his size, Derek slowly began to thrust, eliciting soft moans from her. "I love you, Meredith", he said softly before leaning down to kiss her. "I love you too", Meredith breathed, completely enveloped in the fog of their shared passion.

"Der…I'm close." With this, Derek thrust harder and faster into her, wanted to climax at the same time. "Oh god…Derek…I'm", she yelled as her body was once again hit with wave after wave of pleasure. Feeling the clenching of her walls, Derek let himself go, releasing inside of her. They clung to each other as they rode out their orgasms. "Oh Der", Meredith panted, running her fingers down her back. Derek pressed a soft kiss to her forehead before pulling out gently and wrapping her in his arms. Meredith nuzzled her face into his chest, feeling so safe and loved in his tight embrace.

"We're good practicers", she giggled, kissing his chest.

"I think so", he laughed, pulling her closer and rubbing her back.

"Der…"

"Hmm?"

"How long…I mean…how long after we're married do you want kids?"

"We can—when we're ready." He brushed the hair off her face and kissed her forehead.

"I…you're ready", Meredith said softly. "You're already that guy…the one that changes diapers and knows things and—"

"Mer, you were amazing today", Derek said with a smile, looking straight into her eyes. "Just…the way you held her and fed her…I've never been more in love with you."

"We can do this?"

"We can do this", he repeated. "I promise."

"Okay", she said with a small smile. "Love you, Derek."

"I love you too, Meredith", he said before kissing her softly.

Derek wanted nothing more than to be a father and husband. And he was certain that in time, he would be. Marriage and kids would come, but not until they were both ready. At this moment, he was content with just holding the love of his life in his arms as she slept.

**Hope you liked this chapter. I think they both learned a lot about each other and their hopes for the future. **

**Reviews make me happy. And give me lots of motivation to write. :)**


	11. Plans

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine. But if Shonda wants to share, I'm all for it.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! I really appreciate them. :)**

**This takes place a few days later.**

"Morning", Izzie yawned as she shuffled into the kitchen, her slippers dragging across the tiled floor.

"Morning", Meredith said with a smile as she attempted to flip a pancake in the frying pan.

"What are you making?", Izzie asked, peering over Meredith's shoulder. "Are those pancakes?"

"Yes. Why?"

"No reason. I just…you really made these?"

"Yes", Meredith said, pouring more batter into the pan. "Why?"

"I'm proud", Izzie laughed, patting her on the back. "These actually look okay."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Thank you."

"Why are you up so early?", Izzie asked as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

Meredith sighed. "Derek and I are meeting with the house people after work tonight. I just…I'm nervous about it I guess so I decided to make breakfast to take my mind off of it."

"It'll be fine, Mer. Just tell them what you want. And don't let them talk you into all this crap you don't need."

Meredith laughed. "I'm almost positive Derek mentioned a trampoline. I swear he's five years old."

"Yeah, uh…well, think of it this way. You could have sex on it and nobody would ever know because you're going to live in the middle of nowhere", Izzie laughed.

"I never thought about it that way. Trampoline sex would be fun. Very bouncy", Meredith said with a smile.

"True. Maybe that's why he wanted it", Izzie joked.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Probably."

"So you're thinking July?"

"Yeah. I think so. I mean…all of us are going to be off for two weeks, so we thought it'd be good to do it then."

"Where'd you want to have it?"

Meredith looked up from her frying pan. "We were thinking we would have it outdoors…where the trailer is now. Do you think that would be okay? You're good at stuff like this."

"Oh I like that. And there's not a lot of rain here in July, which is a plus, but you should probably have a tent on hand, just in case. Oh, and a tarp. You'll probably want a tarp either way, so nobody will get grass stains. Maybe some white chairs and lots of flowers for the gazebo…you're getting a gazebo, right? The flowers could match the bridesmaids' dresses", Izzie said as she mentally planned the whole wedding.

"Uh…sounds great, Iz", Meredith said with a smile. She honestly hadn't even begun to think about flowers or dresses yet. The fact that she was engaged still came as a surprise to her. "If you're willing to help, I'll do whatever you want."

"I'll help. Whatever you need, I'm here", Izzie told her with a genuine smile. Meredith knew Izzie wasn't just saying that to be polite. She knew her decorative ways would come in handy, which was good, considering neither Meredith nor Cristina weren't exactly experts in the wedding department.

"Morning", Derek said as he entered the kitchen. "It smells good."

"I cooked", Meredith said with a smile.

"You?", Derek asked, looking to Izzie for confirmation.

Izzie nodded. "She did."

Derek walked over and gave Meredith a kiss on the cheek. "I'm impressed."

Meredith giggled. "Shut up."

"No I really am. Better than cold pizza", he laughed.

"That's true", Meredith said, handing him the eggs. "Here. I haven't mastered eggs yet."

"Okay", Derek laughed as he stood next to her and made breakfast for the three of them.

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"So when are you and McDreamy meeting with the house guy?", Cristina asked as they changed into their scrubs.

"Five-ish. We're just going to stay at the trailer tonight rather than drive back home", Meredith told her as she tied her hair back into a ponytail.

"So we won't have to listen to the sex tonight?", Alex asked with a smirk.

Meredith blushed furiously. "You guys can hear us?"

"The walls aren't exactly soundproof. And you're uh, very…vocal", Izzie laughed.

"The shower isn't soundproof either. It actually echoes, making everything louder", Cristina added with emphasis, shoving her clothes into her cubby.

"I get it", Meredith said, cutting them off, clearly mortified.

"Relax, Mer. Half the time, I can just sleep through it", Alex joked.

"How do you…? You're all the way down the hall", Meredith said with a confused look on her face.

"Still loud", Izzie chimed in.

"Derek has kids' rooms in these plans, right?", Cristina asked.

"Yes…why?"

"Be sure to put them way down at the opposite end of the hallway, far away from the master bedroom. The poor kids will be traumatized when they hear mommy and daddy going at it", Cristina said with a smirk.

"This conversation is starting to creep me out", Meredith confessed as she leaned her head against the wall, closing her eyes and wishing herself out of the room. Luckily, Dr. Bailey entered the lounge, ending any conversation they were previously having.

"Why are you all still in here? You're interns are waiting in the hall", Bailey said as she motioned them toward the door using her hand.

"Grey", Bailey said as she lightly grabbed Meredith's arm, stopping her in her tracks.

"Yes, Dr. Bailey?"

"The Chief wants to see you before you leave today."

"Oh…I…do you know why?", Meredith asked before biting her bottom lip, wondering if she was in trouble for anything.

"Relax, Grey", Bailey chuckled. "I think he just wants to congratulate you."

"Oh", Meredith sighed. "Okay. I will, thanks", she said before hurrying down the hallway to find Mark, her attending for the day.

"Morning, Grey", Mark smiled as she met up with him at the nurses' station.

"Morning", Meredith returned pleasantly, peering over the chart Mark was scribbling in. "Anything good today?"

"Boob job", Mark said with a smile.

Meredith looked at him, her face expressionless. "Seriously?"

"Part of the job, Grey", he said, winking at Erica Hahn as she passed by them in the hallway.

"Oh, and I suppose winking at her is also part of your job description", Meredith said sarcastically.

"She has a thing for me", he smiled confidently.

Meredith turned away from him with the chart. "She does not."

"Yes she does", he retorted, catching up to her as she walked toward their patient's room.

"Mhm", Meredith said dryly.

Mark just smiled. "Do me a favor."

"What?"

"Invite her to the wedding."

"What? I don't even…why?", Meredith asked curiously.

"I'm assuming Derek told you I was the best man."

"Yes…but…"

"She sees me in a suit, looking all charming, doing the whole best man thing…it's a done deal", Mark explained.

"I…wait, you're serious?"

"Hell yes I am. And think of it this way…you're inviting everyone else. Wouldn't it look rude not to invite her along?"

Meredith shrugged, realizing that Mark had a point. "Fine. We'll invite her. But do _not_ hit on her during the wedding. After the wedding…sure. But not during, got it?"

Mark laughed and wrapped his arm around her, giving her shoulders a gentle squeeze. "Thanks, Grey. I always knew you were my favorite."

Meredith just rolled her eyes and laughed. "Happy to help, Dr. Sloan", she said as they entered their patient's room, preparing for the upcoming surgery.

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"Chief", Meredith said softly as she knocked on the open door of his office.

Richard looked up and smiled. "Hello, Meredith. Come in."

After she sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, he began to speak. "I just wanted to congratulate you on the engagement. I know you've been busy with work, so I haven't seen you for a few days."

"Oh, thank you, sir", Meredith said with a small smile, folding her hands in her lap. "Sorry…I should have come to see you sooner. I've…"

"No reason to apologize. I know how it is around here", he said with an assuring nod. "When Derek told me you'd gotten engaged…I don't think I've ever seen him so happy. He loves you, Meredith." He paused before continuing. "I know that…things weren't always easy for you…your childhood—I just wanted to apologize, Meredith. And I know I can't turn back time, but I just…I'm sorry, Meredith", Richard said sincerely, the sadness evident in his eyes.

"You don't have to…"

"I do. I've caused you a lot of pain…pain that you didn't deserve. Pain that you should have never had to go through. And I just wanted you to know that if there's anything I can do…not that it will make up for it…but I'm here for you."

Meredith twisted the ring on her finger and looked up at him. "Actually, um…I was, well, I was wondering if…you would…walk me down the aisle…at the wedding. My father and I don't…and I just thought that if you…"

Richard smiled. "Meredith, I would be honored. Nothing would make me happier", he said sincerely.

"Thank you, sir", she said softly, tears welling in her eyes. "I...thank you."

"You're welcome", he said before standing up from his desk. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in for a hug. Meredith smiled, embracing him in the same way. The remained in the comfort of each other's arms for few minutes before breaking the hug.

Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Okay…I should get back to work. I, um…thank you."

Richard smiled and nodded, opening the door for Meredith who left and made her way down the hall, wiping the few stray tears that escaped from her eyes.

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After checking in on her and Mark's patient, Meredith changed out of her scrubs and made her way to the lobby, where Derek was waiting for her.

"Hey you", Derek smiled as he saw her approaching.

"Hi. Sorry I'm a little late. I was just finishing post-op notes on Mark's patient."

"Anything good today?", he asked as they walked out to the car.

Meredith laughed. "Boob job. Oh, and before I forget to tell you, Hahn is invited to the wedding."

"Oh, okay. That's fine."

"Mark is planning on charming her with his best man skills", she laughed.

"That's Mark. Using our wedding day for his own benefit", he joked as they got into the car and drove toward the land to meet with the contractor.

When they reached the land, Derek parked the car and together they made the short walk toward the cliff where their home would be. "So…you want a trampoline?", Meredith asked with a giggle, taking his hand in her own.

"Yeah. Why? You don't?"

Meredith looked at him and shook her head. "When are we going to find the time to jump on a trampoline?"

"We'll make time", he said before kissing her cheek.

"Izzie had a good point. We could have sex on it, and no one would ever know."

"You see? A trampoline is a good idea", he laughed.

"Thank Izzie."

"I'll be sure to", he joked.

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"Five bedrooms?", Meredith asked as they walked back toward the trailer after meeting with the contractor.

"Yeah", Derek said, wrapping his arm around her. "Why?"

"Well, there's one for us. And one for a guestroom. And then there's three more left over."

"Our kids are going to need rooms, too."

"So…three kids?", Meredith asked curiously.

Derek shrugged. "Well…no. I don't know. We never really talked about it. But I just wanted to be on the safe side."

"Have you forgotten that I'll be the one carrying our children around for nine months and then pushing them out of my body? I want a say in this", Meredith giggled.

"If I could help you with that, you know I would", Derek laughed as he opened the door to the trailer, following Meredith inside.

"But seriously…this is important. How many kids do you want?", Meredith asked as she plopped down onto the bed and took her shoes off.

Derek sat down next to her and scooted them back toward the pillows. "I don't know. How many do you want?"

"Two. I think two would be good. And if I somehow get pregnant with the baby we'll make on the trampoline, we'll have the extra room", Meredith joked, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Sounds good to me", Derek said softly before kissing the top of her head.

"I just…when I was little, I was lonely, you know? I always wanted a brother or sister…someone to talk to or play with when I was sad or bored. So…two. I want them to have each other", Meredith breathed.

"Okay", Derek said with a nod before kissing her softly.

"Der?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you…I just…do you ever get scared?"

"Scared? Scared of what?"

Meredith shrugged, tears welling in her eyes. "This…us…anything?"

"Mer", he said softly, wiping the few stray tears on her cheeks. "We can do this. I promise. And it's okay to be scared. I get scared too."

"Yeah?"

Derek nodded. "But then…I think back to the day I met you, and how ever since, everything is just so clear. I know this is meant to be. You're the love of my life. When I think about that, I'm not scared anymore."

"Yeah", Meredith whimpered, nodding her head.

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her body closer to his. "I love you, Meredith."

"I love you too", she said softly, kissing his cheek.

"Hope you're hungry."

"Yeah…why?"

"Because I'm cooking for you." Derek kissed her forehead before getting off the bed and walking toward the fridge. "I have chicken parmesan and spaghetti."

"Did you plan this?", Meredith laughed as she walked up and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Maybe."

"Mhm", Meredith smiled, looking around. She noticed the tablecloth and candles sitting on top of the counter. "You did plan this."

"I did. I thought it would be nice to eat on the porch. Just a little dinner date…"

"Sounds nice", Meredith said, kissing him softly. "Can I help?"

"Did you want to boil the water for the spaghetti?"

"I think I can boil water", she giggled.

Together, they made dinner, conversation coming easy like it always had. Being at the trailer gave them a sense of privacy they didn't always have at her house. The time they got to spend with just the two of them was always welcomed.

After they finished cooking, Meredith set up the table cloth, candles, and wine glasses on the table outside on the porch. Derek brought out the steaming hot plates of food, a bottle of wine tucked under his arm.

Meredith lit the candles and moved them away from the food. "This is nice", she smiled, pushing her seat close to his to keep warm on the cool December night.

"Are you too cold?" he asked as he wrapped a large blanket around both of their shoulders.

Meredith shook her head. "No. I like it out here. It's peaceful and…ours."

"That's why I bought land out here. I thought about getting an apartment, but it just…wasn't me. When I found this, I knew I had to have it. When I was little, my dad used to take me and Mark camping a lot…just to get away from my sisters for the weekend", Derek laughed. But Meredith noticed the sadness in his eyes as looked out before him at the acres of endless land. "He died. He died when I was nine."

"Derek", Meredith said sympathetically. "I didn't…you never told me that before."

"I'm sorry. I know I should have but I just—", he started before Meredith cut him off.

"You don't have to apologize. I just…I'm so sorry, Derek", she said sadly. "How?"

"He got sick. It was…it happened fast. We thought he'd be okay, but…one day, my two older sisters and I got home from school, and my mom told us. He died. He died while I was at school. I didn't…I never got to…", he paused, at a loss for words.

"Der", Meredith said softly, taking his hand in her own. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. It happened a long time ago…but I just…I still miss him. My family wasn't the same afterward. We didn't talk about it…so this is good. I like talking about him."

"That's why you and Mark are so close…he was the only guy you had to talk to", Meredith said with a nod. She knew that after Mark slept with Addison, Derek was crushed. She just never knew how hard it hit him. Mark was Derek's brother in every way but blood. And that sort of betrayal was just too much to bear. "And that's why you came out here when…"

"And that's why I came out here", he said solemnly. "But…if you think about it, I wouldn't have met you if Mark and Addison hadn't... I should probably thank them for that one day", he said with a small smile.

"What about your mom? How did she…I mean, afterward…how did she do it? With five of you…"

"That's just who she is. She's tough…she was always strong for us. We all knew she was sad, but she was always there. Looking back, I don't know how she did it. She's a saint…raising five of us—well, six, if you count Mark—all by herself."

"She's an amazing person", Meredith smiled.

"She is", Derek agreed, taking a sip of his wine.

"Did you call her yet?"

"Yeah, I did."

"And…?"

"She, um…she wants to visit", Derek said cautiously.

"Oh…I um, yeah. Okay", Meredith nodded.

"Okay?"

"Yeah. That makes sense. She's going to meet me eventually, and I'd rather it be before the wedding", Meredith laughed. "But you can't leave my side the entire time she's here."

"I'll do my best, but she'll probably want to talk to you by herself…without me there", Derek laughed.

"What did you tell her about me?", Meredith asked as they continued to eat their food.

"I told her…everything. I told her how much I love you, and that you're the love of my life and that I've never been happier. And that I plan on spending the rest of my life with you", he said with a warm smile.

"What did she say?", she asked, biting her lip. Meredith was never good with parents. Or parental approval. Or anything having to do with parents. The thought of Derek's mother coming out to meet her was scary, but she knew they needed to meet each other. Preferably before she walked down the aisle.

"She said you sounded, uh, what was the word she used? Lovely…she said you sounded like a lovely woman and she can't wait to meet you", he smiled. "Don't worry, she's not like Nancy. And my sisters aren't either. You've got nothing to worry about."

"She doesn't consider me the home wrecker?"

"My family loves Addison…Mark, too, even after everything that happened. And you did nothing wrong. So there's no reason for them to think you're a home wrecker", Derek said assuringly. "It'll be fine. I promise."

"Okay, I trust you", Meredith said genuinely. "And I love you", she breathed before kissing him softly.

"I love you too", he said with a warm smile. He wrapped his arm around her small frame and rubbed her arm with his hand. "Are you sure you're not too cold?"

"No. I'm okay", she said, her mouth full of chicken. Derek loved that she talked with her mouth full. It was one of her charms that always made him smile. She didn't act classy around him or pretend to be someone she wasn't. She was perfectly content with being Meredith. And Derek loved her for it.

"I talked to the Chief today", she said after taking a sip of wine.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Actually, I um…I asked him…to walk me down the aisle", she said quietly.

"You did?", he asked with a small smile.

"Yeah. My father I were never really—I just thought it would be nice if he did it", Meredith said softly, tucking her hair behind her ear.

"I think that's great, Mer. I'm sure he's thrilled to do it", Derek grinned. In this moment, he was so proud of her. He was always proud of her, but even more so right now, if that was possible. He was also grateful to Richard for being there and supporting her like a true father would. He knew Richard loved her as though she were his own daughter. Richard was more of a father than Thatcher Grey would ever be to her. He didn't deserve to walk Meredith down the aisle. Richard loves her unconditionally, and for that reason, he's the only one Derek would want to do the honor.

"Yeah", Meredith said softly. "Oh, and I know where I want to go on the honeymoon."

"Where?"

"Venice. Well, Italy, but definitely Venice."

Derek nodded. "Okay. Why Venice?". He asked with a smile.

"I um…had this cancer patient a while ago. She was telling me how she and her husband wanted to go there before she died…and ride in a gondola under the Bridge of Sighs. Apparently, if you ride under it 

with the person you love, you'll be together for all eternity", Meredith said softly, a small smile on her face.

"Venice sounds perfect", Derek said softly before tilting her chin up to kiss her.

"Yeah?"

"Mhm", he breathed, kissing her again. "I can't wait to ride under the gondola with you."

Meredith smiled, resting her head on his shoulder. Both were silent for a few minutes. The only sound was their steady breathing. The dancing flames from the lit candles provided a soft yellow light illuminating the dark December night as they gazed out before them. It was as though they were secluded from the outside world. Being out here gave them a sense of privacy and seclusion they would find nowhere else.

"I'm getting a little cold", she said rubbing her hands together.

"Come on." He kissed her cheek before they both cleaned up and went inside.

Meredith grabbed her bag off the couch and walked toward the bed. She hastily shimmied out of her jeans and sweater, standing there in just her bra and panties. Derek stood there and chuckled softly to himself, loving that she felt so comfortable as to change her clothes right in front of him.

"I'm borrowing a pair of your pajama pants", Meredith said, walking over to the small dresser and pulling out a pair of Derek's navy blue flannel pants. Derek watched as she hopped up and down on alternating legs, pulling the pants over her slim waist. She walked back over to the bed and pulled out her long sleeve grey shirt before unclasping her bra and taking it off. Derek had seen her body, exposed to him, countless times, but she never ceased to take his breath away. He could admire her for hours, just taking in the curves of her soft, small body. "You're beautiful", Derek smiled as she pulled the shirt over her head.

Meredith giggled, walking up to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him softly. He picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He walked back toward the bed and deposited her on top of the blanket. After getting changed into a pair of pajama pants and an old tee shirt, he walked back up to her. "Dessert?", he asked with a smile.

"By dessert do you mean sex?", she giggled.

"I was thinking more like ice cream…porny", he laughed, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

"Ice cream? What kind?"

"Coffee for me. Strawberry for you." He walked over to the freezer and pulled out two pints. He grabbed two spoons from the drawer and made his way back over to the bed. Meredith lifted the covers and he slid under them, pulling her close to him.

"You really went all out tonight", she said, spooning some of the ice cream into her mouth, moaning at the taste. "This almost beats sex."

"Almost being the key word", he laughed, eating a scoop of his own.

"Thank you, Derek. This is…I appreciate it", she said, snuggling her body closer to his.

"You don't have to thank me. I love doing stuff like this with you", he said as he caressed her cheek with his thumb. For a moment, they couldn't help but peer into one another's eyes, getting lost in the deep love they felt. It was stronger than anything either had ever known. And they knew their connection would last forever. "I love you, Meredith", Derek said softly, breaking the silence they had been enveloped in.

Her entire body erupted into goose bumps. No matter how many times he said those words to her, she would never get tired of hearing them. Something about the way he said her name made her feel so safe and loved. When they were together, nothing else mattered. They could just be. "I love you, too."

"Oh, before I forget…Stevens was working with me today. She gave me the names of some cake decorators and florists. She told me to give them to you", Derek laughed. "Apparently, we won't need to hire a wedding coordinator."

"Guess not", she giggled. "But we really have to start planning. We only have a few months."

"Okay", Derek nodded, turning to face her. "What kind of dress do you want?"

Meredith pondered for a moment. "Strapless maybe?"

"I like strapless…easier to get off", Derek said before kissing her softly.

She just rolled her eyes and laughed. "Then there's the whole bridesmaid dress thing. If I can get them to agree on something, that's half the battle. It doesn't have to be the same style, but I want the colors to match."

"I'd rather not have a rainbow of colors coming down the aisle either", Derek laughed. "Who did you want in the wedding party?"

"Cristina is the maid of honor. Izzie, definitely. I guess I should ask Callie. Maybe she'd want to. Crap…then there's Lexie. I guess it would be rude if my own step sister wasn't included. Ugh, I don't know", Meredith said, taking another mouthful of ice cream. "But then if there are too many people in the wedding, we're not going to have any guests. Well, besides your family. But my side will be empty."

"We can keep it small", Derek said assuringly, not wanting her to worry herself about this too much just yet.

"Yeah. I'll ask Izzie's opinion. She's good with stuff like this", Meredith nodded. "Who did you want?"

"Mark. Probably just Mark. Unless you wanted O'Malley and Karev in it. I don't have a problem with that."

"I need those two filling up my side. And Hahn, too. I guess Molly and Eric. But they may be my only sort-of-real-family there."

"I'm sorry, Mer", Derek said sympathetically.

"Don't be. I was never really close with my biological family. The people I work with…they're my real family…they're the ones that are important to me", Meredith told him with a nod. "That's enough wedding talk for now. What about the reception?"

"Where did you want to have it?"

Meredith giggled, blushing softly. "I…never mind, it's stupid."

"I'm sure it's not stupid. Just tell me."

"I just…when I was little, before I turned into my dark, cynical self, my dad and I would drive past the Space Needle on our way to the playground or wherever…I always pictured myself dancing with my husband—whoever he was—I always pictured dancing with him up there. It just looked so…pretty and…I just thought it would be nice."

Derek smiled, taking her hand. He loved that she was so open with him. "Then that's what we'll do."

"How?", Meredith asked with a smirk. "Don't you have to reserve things like that months in advance?"

"We have seven months", Derek reminded her.

"I…you're serious?"

"Of course", he said simply. "I want us to do this."

Meredith smiled. For many moments, all she could do was look at him, not saying a word. She couldn't think of anything to say to express the love she felt for him. Not that this wasn't Derek-y. He'd do anything for her to be happy.

"What?", he asked softly.

"You're just…I love you", she whispered, pressing his lips to hers. She weaved her fingers through his hair and he pulled her onto his lap. Meredith moaned softly, giving him the chance to slip his tongue past her lips. Their tongues clashed, their bodies savoring in the passion of their shared desire. Eventually, the need for breath forced them to pull away. Meredith let out a deep breath and smiled at him. "How are we going to dance if you don't dance in public?"

"I think I can make an exception for you", he grinned, rubbing his hands up and down her back.

"Do you want to dance with me now?"

"Now?"

"We've never danced together before. Which is…odd. But, we haven't. I think maybe we should."

"I would love to." He kissed her again softly.

Meredith giggled. "Seriously?"

"Meredith, would you dance with me?", he asked in a way that made her roll her eyes. He was cheesy, and overly charming, but in a way that made her feel happy and loved. Sure, it would probably begin to drive her crazy after a while. But for now, she loved it.

"Yes", she laughed, taking his hand in her own and pulling him off the bed. "Do you have any music? Soft, pretty, music that we could dance to?"

"I might", he said, turning on the radio. Luckily, he sprang for satellite, so he quickly searched for an appropriate station. After finding one that suited them, he tossed the remote on the bed.

Derek pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her waist. Meredith wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled at him. "How have I never danced with you before?", he asked softly as they swayed back and forth to the quiet music in the background.

"It is a little weird", she laughed.

"I like dancing with you."

"I like dancing with you, too."

"You look so beautiful right now", he whispered into her ear.

Meredith blushed. "You mean as I stand here braless and in your pajama pants?"

"Yes", he said, kissing her forehead. "You always look beautiful."

"I'm glad I found you."

"Me too."

"You're my one night stand that turned out to be _the one_. How weird is that?", she giggled softly at her own revelation.

"I like to look at it as amazing. But I guess weird works too", he joked.

"Thank you for dancing with me", she said softly, resting her cheek against his.

"I plan on dancing with you every day for the rest of our lives.

"Good", she whispered. "I love you, Derek."

"I love you too, Meredith", he said softly, holding her close as they danced together in the warm, dimly lit trailer as the soft, melodic music kept their gentle swaying rhythm. Nothing about it was particularly fancy, but it didn't matter. Being with one another was enough. They could talk about anything they wanted to, and be completely comfortable. They could cry and laugh and allow themselves to be vulnerable, and it was okay. Because no matter how they felt, their love for one another would get them through everything. It was the kind of love that lasted a lifetime.

**So, this chapter had lots of important stuff…the talk about Derek's dad, and having kids and getting married and the house is being built…so yeah, big, important things. And they never danced before, but I really want them to…hopefully one day and hopefully soon.**

**I finish school for the summer in two weeks, which means I'll have four months free to write. Yay! Also, my birthday is in two weeks. Reviews make good birthday gifts. Hint hint. :P**


	12. Wedding Plans

**Disclaimer: Not mine. But I am so incredibly proud of Meredith for how amazing she is in these episodes.**

**Is this fic getting old? I might just stop it soon if nobody is into it anymore. Let me know…**

Meredith had been working in the pit almost all week. She technically didn't have to, it was more of an interns' job. But she was doing it as a favor to Bailey. Apparently Meredith had a hard time saying no, especially because Bailey had saved her life.

Working in the pit wouldn't be so bad if trauma cases led to surgeries. But it was flu season. And for days, those were the only cases that came into the ER, which sucked, because the flu was contagious. And she was getting sick. To add to it, Derek's mom was visiting in a few days and planning to stay at Meredith's house. And she wanted to make sure the house was in perfect condition when she arrived.

"What's wrong with you?", Cristina asked as she bit into her salad.

"Sick", Meredith muttered, her voice barely audible because her head was face down on the lunch table.

"Why don't you just go home", Alex suggested.

"Because. My interns are stupid and I can't leave them all alone in the pit", Meredith groaned. "I don't mean you, George."

"Thanks, Mer", George joked.

"Seriously though, Meredith. You should go home. Do you have a fever?", Izzie asked as she felt Meredith's forehead. "Damn it, Meredith, you're burning up."

"I'm fine", Meredith mumbled.

"Don't make me get Shepherd. He'll drag you out of here if he has to", Cristina warned.

"That'd be hot", Alex smirked.

"Alex", Izzie said shaking her head.

"Mer, if you're sick, you really shouldn't be treating patients", George told her.

"I'll just update charts or something", Meredith said with a sniffle. "Really, I'm fine."

Luckily, Dr. Bailey walked by their table, holding a stack of post-op notes. "Dr. Bailey, will you tell Meredith to go home?", Izzie asked.

"Why? What's wrong with her?", Bailey asked as she walked over to Meredith's listless form on the other side of the table.

"Just the flu. I'm fine, Dr. Bailey", Meredith said, lifting her head and putting on her best fake smile.

"Mhm. You look fine", Bailey said sarcastically. "I'm paging Shepherd. You can't work when you can barely open your eyes, Grey."

"Derek's in surgery. I can just…I'm fine", Meredith continued to protest.

Bailey shook her head. "Will one of you go take her to an on-call room? I'll tell Shepherd to take her home after his surgery."

"Sure, Dr. Bailey", George nodded. "Come on, Mer."

"Can you walk, Meredith?", Izzie asked softly.

"Yes. I can walk", Meredith said as she stood up a little too quickly. "Oh God…room…spinning."

Alex walked up and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close to him. "Don't breathe on me", he joked, supporting most of her weight as she leaned against him.

After they settled her into an on-call room, Izzie offered to stay with her until Derek was finished his surgery. Cristina dropped off her tote bag so she and Derek could leave right after he was done.

"Mer, do you feel like you're going to throw up?", Izzie asked in a quiet voice.

"No…yes…maybe", Meredith murmured into the pillow.

Izzie watched the minutes pass on the small alarm clock, hoping Derek would come soon. She had a surgery with Hahn in a half hour and she really didn't want to miss it.

"Iz", Derek whispered as he entered the room, much to Izzie's relief.

"Yeah…she's in here. She keeps dozing off. Do you need me to help get her up?"

"No I've got her. Thanks, Stevens", Derek said with a small smile as Izzie quietly got up from the foot of the bed and left the room.

Derek sat down next to her. "Mer", he said softly, not wanting to startle her.

"Hmm?"

"Come on. We're going home", he said as he rubbed her leg.

"But…you…surgery", she groaned.

"I don't have any more surgeries today", he told her, gently lifting her body from the hard mattress.

"Der…sleep", she moaned.

"You can sleep in the car, and once we get home. Come on", he whispered, kissing her forehead, noticing her obvious fever. "I don't want you getting any sicker."

"I'm in my scrubs."

"That's okay. You can wear them home." Derek grabbed her bag off the table before helping her off the bed. "That's it. I've got you", he whispered, holding her upright.

Making it out to the car was a small struggle, but Derek finally managed to get her in the car and buckle her seatbelt. When they arrived home, Meredith had barely made it through the front door before clutching her stomach and going pale.

Derek knew she was about to get sick, so her quickly led her up the stairs and into her private bathroom. Meredith hunched over the toilet and began vomiting. "It's okay, Mer", Derek said soothingly, holding her hair back from her face.

When she was finally finished, Derek was sure there was nothing left for her to throw up. Meredith curled up into a ball on the bathroom floor. "Oh God", she groaned.

"Here you go. Sit up and gargle with some mouthwash", he said as he rubbed her back.

Meredith did as she was told before lying back down on the floor. "I'm cold and…this floor is…ick."

"Did you want to get in the bath? You might feel better", he said softly as he wiped the hair out of her face.

"I…yeah", she nodded.

"Okay. I'll be right back." He quickly gathered up a large towel along with her robe and came back into the bathroom. "Can you stand up, Meredith?", he asked while taking off her shoes and socks.

"Yeah", she nodded. With Derek's help she made it on her feet. He made sure she was steady before he turned on the knobs in the tub so it would be ready for her. He pulled the scrub top over her head, tossing it onto her bedroom floor. Then he reached behind her, unclasping her bra and pulling it from her shoulders.

A shiver went through her body, and Derek quickly rubbed his hands up and down her arms in an attempt to keep her warm. After removing her pants and panties, he guided her into the tub, making sure the warm water completely enveloped her body. "Mmm", she moaned softly. "Thank you, Derek."

"I love you", he whispered, kissing the top of her head. Derek knelt next to the tub, not wanting to leave her side.

"What are you doing?", she asked. Her eyes were fluttering to stay open as she lay listlessly in the tub.

"I don't want you to fall asleep", he chuckled softly. "Want me to help?"

Meredith nodded weakly. "Mhm."

Derek knew Meredith didn't like being taken care of unless she desperately needed it. But now, she was sick, and he was there to help her in any way he could. He wet her head, then lathered her lavender shampoo and conditioner through her hair. Meredith had a small smile on her face as he massaged his fingers through her scalp. "I love you, Derek", she yawned.

Derek smiled warmly at her. "I love you, too." When he was finished with her hair, he rinsed the top of her head and continued to wash the rest of her body. By the time she was finished, his shirt sleeves were soaked, as well as his knees. He chuckled softly, just appreciating the fact that she was letting him take care of her.

After getting out of the tub, he gently helped her dry off before slipping her into her robe. "I'm going to get you some crackers and water, and then call in a prescription for you. I'll be right back." He kissed her forehead before making his way downstairs.

When he grabbed her bag off the floor, he noticed that one of her friends, presumably Izzie or Cristina, had put some medication in there for her to take. Derek was thankful, because now he didn't have to go to the pharmacy and leave her home alone.

He walked back into the room and found Meredith under the covers. Her wet hair soaked into the pillow, causing a large wet spot on the red pillowcase. Derek shook his head and chuckled to himself. "Here you go. I want you to take one of these pills. It'll probably make you sleepy, but that's okay. You need to rest. And I have some crackers in case you get hungry", he said as he handed her a pill and her glass of water.

As she sat up, the front of her robe fell open. "Der…my boobs are showing", she giggled tiredly, after taking her pill.

"I can see that", he laughed. "And your pillow is soaked. I'll get you some pajamas and a towel for your head." He walked over to the dresser and pulled out a pair of his pajama pants along with a tee shirt and a pair of panties. "Do you need help getting dressed?"

"No. I can do it", she nodded. Derek handed her the clothes and left to get her another towel and pillowcase. When he returned, he found her hobbling in an effort to pull the flannel pants over her legs. "Mer", he said, attempting to stifle a laugh. She may have been sick, but it didn't make her any less adorable. "Need help?"

Meredith dropped onto the bed. "Yes", she breathed. Derek easily pulled her pants up and helped her with her shirt. "You're warm, Mer", he said, pressing his lips to her forehead.

"That's because I'm sick", she sniffled.

"I know." He kissed the top of her head. After changing her pillowcase and giving her his dry pillow, he wrapped a towel around her hair and eased her back into bed. "Sleep", he whispered, crawling into bed next to her.

"Your mom…visiting…the house is…", she murmured into his chest, the medicine kicking in and making her drowsy.

"I know. We'll be ready when she comes", he assured her as he gently rubbed her back.

"Hmm. Okay", she mumbled. He felt her body fully relax in his arms as she drifted off to sleep. Derek kissed her forehead and wiped the stray strands of hair off of her face. After he made sure she was in a deep sleep, he carefully got out of bed to get her a cold washcloth for her forehead. When he returned, Derek chuckled when he noticed that she had kicked the covers off of herself and was snoring softly.

He spent the rest of the evening in bed next to Meredith just reading over some medical journals, careful not to disturb her. She looked so cute as she laid there with the washcloth draped over her forehead, her hair disheveled having not brushed it after her bath. Derek couldn't help but watch her sleep. Eventually he put his journals on the nightstand and turned off the dim lamp. He kissed her cheek softly, and wrapped his arm around her.

"I love you, Meredith", Derek whispered as be began rubbing her back. "And I'll always be here to take care of you, even when you say you're fine, because I know better than to believe you", he chuckled softly. "It's okay to not be fine sometimes. I always want you to be able to come to me, and talk to me about anything. I'm here for you. I love you so much." He kissed her again and soon drifted off to sleep, his arm protectively wrapped around her.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

The next morning—well, Meredith thought it was morning, but it was actually mid-afternoon—she awoke to find Izzie and Cristina at the foot of her bed, talking quietly.

"What? I…where's Derek?", she mumbled, still in a sleepy state.

"He got called into work this morning, and he didn't want to wake you", Izzie explained softly.

"And he put us in charge of you", Cristina said as she reached for the note he had left her. "Here. McDreamy left you a love note."

_Mer,_

_I got paged for an emergency surgery. I'll be home as soon as I can. Hope you're feeling better. Be sure to eat and drink, and get some rest. I love you._

_Love,_

_Derek_

Meredith smiled to herself. She loved the little notes he would leave her when his shift started before hers in the morning. She could be in the worst of moods, but they always managed to brighten her day.

"How are you feeling, Mer? Do you still have a fever?", Izzie asked, reaching across the bed to feel Meredith's forehead. "Yeah, you still feel a little warm."

"I feel a lot better than I did yesterday", Meredith yawned. "I'm just a little achy."

"I'll go get you some Tylenol. And you should probably eat something. Are you hungry?"

"Yeah, I'll just have a few crackers or something. Thanks, Iz", Meredith smiled, propping herself against the headboard.

"Okay, be right back", Izzie said before hopping off the bed and making her way downstairs.

"Are you spending your day off catering to me too", Meredith joked.

Cristina rolled her eyes. "No. But it's better than being home. Hahn has been over every night this week, and seeing as she hates me, I'd rather be here sitting in your sickbed."

"So what are we doing today?", Meredith asked, brushing the hair off of her face.

Cristina shrugged. "I planned on drinking, then crashing on your couch tonight."

"You can drink after we plan", Izzie said as she walked back into the room, balancing Meredith's Tylenol, food, and glass of water in one hand and a stack of books and magazines in the other.

"Plan what?", Meredith questioned as she took the pills and swallowed.

"The wedding", Izzie told them.

"Okay, listen Martha Stewart, I'm not spending my day off to help you choose fabrics and wedding toppers", Cristina said shaking her head.

"You're the maid of honor", Izzie reminded her.

"Actually, um…well, if you wanted to…I wanted you both to be maids of honor", Meredith said, biting her lip.

"But I thought…", Izzie started.

"Yeah, but—this is going to sound Derek-level cheesy—but you're both my sisters. I want you both to do it", Meredith said with a small smile.

""Really?", Izzie asked excitedly.

"Yeah", Meredith shrugged. "And it sort of makes more sense this way…I mean, instead of having one bridesmaid."

"So it's just going to be the two of us?"

"Yeah. I thought about Lexie, but I just…she's great, but I don't really know her like I know you guys, and I…do you think she'll mind?", Meredith asked nervously.

"I don't think she expects you to put her in the wedding", Izzie assured her. "But I think you should invite her."

"I am. She's sitting on my side. Everybody from the hospital is on my side."

"Who do you mean when you say _everyone_?", Cristina asked cautiously.

"Everyone…you know…Alex, George, Mark, Callie, Hahn, Bailey, the Chief. Maybe we can round up a few others."

"Damn it", Cristina said rolling her eyes.

"What?"

"Why Hahn?"

"Mark's idea. He's going to impress her with his best man skills", Meredith said before sneezing a few times.

"Look at it this way…you could impress Hahn with you maid of honor skills", Izzie said with a smile.

"Oh right, because I'm sure fluffing the train on the dress is going to get me in the OR", Cristina joked.

"I don't want a train", Meredith butted in. "Or a veil…but my point is…I need bodies on my side of the…whatever it's called. It's bad enough Derek has a thousand relatives."

"Is Addison coming?", Cristina asked.

"Oh…I um, I didn't even think about it. Do you think Derek wants her to come? We're all sort of friends in a completely strange way. Or would that be braggy—like rubbing it in her face. I don't want it to seem that way", Meredith rambled.

"I would ask Derek before you invite her. But it might be nice. It would give them a chance to catch up", Izzie reasoned.

Meredith nodded. "I guess I'll ask him."

"Now…wedding cakes", Izzie said, reaching for her magazines.

"Oh God", Cristina groaned. "Did Shepherd put you up to this?"

Izzie shook her head. "No, just thought I'd start planning. I'm one of you maids of honor now. It's part of my job description."

"You'd plan the wedding even if you weren't invited", Cristina pointed out.

"Shouldn't you be helping too", Izzie asked.

"I'm here. I'm helping", Cristina argued.

"Yeah, okay. So Mer…cakes."

"What about them?"

"What kind do you want?"

"Vanilla."

"What kind of vanilla?"

"What? What do you mean?"

"There's French vanilla, vanilla bean, white chocolate disguised as vanilla…"

"Uh…French vanilla", Meredith said quickly, knowing that Izzie's list of vanilla possibilities probably went on for pages.

"A traditional cake right? With stacked layers and fancy frosting and trim?"

"Yeah. Sounds good", Meredith smiled. She was thankful to have Izzie helping her. Meredith didn't know a damn thing about wedding cakes, or how to write a proper wedding invitation, or that the type of flowers "set the theme of the wedding", as she called it. And Cristina knew even less than she did. She was a huge help, and Meredith was convinced that if Izzie wasn't a surgeon, she'd made an amazing wedding planner.

The three of them spent the rest of the afternoon going over wedding details. Surprisingly, it wasn't nearly as painful as Cristina or Meredith thought it would be and they made a lot of progress. Meredith enjoyed spending this time with her friends. Lately, she'd been spending a lot of time with Derek, so getting an afternoon with Izzie and Cristina was welcomed. The day in bed allowed Meredith to rest and to relax, something she needed after such a stressful week at work.

Derek returned home later that night. He was supposed to do one surgery, and then come back home. But due to the massive pile-up on the nearby highway, he was stuck in the OR all day doing one surgery after another. But now, he was home. Well, Meredith's house, which he considered home because the love of his life lived there. He came into the bedroom to find Meredith looking through some of the magazines Izzie had left her.

"Hey you", Derek smiled as he made his was over to the bed and kissed her cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. But I'm still congested, and I feel a little achy", Meredith told him.

"Want me to give you a massage?", he asked with a grin.

"If that's your way to get me to have sex with you, then no. But if it's just a massage, yes. I would love one."

"Okay", Derek laughed. "But I want you to eat something. I have some soup heating up for you downstairs. And I got you ginger ale."

"You did?", Meredith asked with a smile.

"I did", he nodded, kissing her softy.

"You shouldn't kiss me. I'm contagious", she giggled against his lips.

"I can't not kiss you", he murmured.

"I love you", Meredith breathed, wrapping her arms around him.

"I love you too", Derek said softly, returning her hug. Every time Meredith said I love you, Derek swore his heart fluttered. A short time ago, those three words never came out of her mouth. But now, she was saying it so often, like a habit. And he would never get tired of hearing her say it.

"Did you want to come downstairs to eat, or did you want me to bring it up?", Derek asked her, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear.

"I'll come down."

"Where is everyone?"

"Joe's. I told them to go out. I felt bad having them sit here with me all day."

"Sorry I wasn't here today. The ER got flooded with crash victims", Derek explained as they walked downstairs and into the kitchen.

Meredith shrugged. "It's okay. We got a lot of wedding planning done."

"Did you?", he asked with a smile as he got soup for both of them.

"Yep. We're getting a French vanilla cake with all sorts of fancy named things I can't even pronounce. And we narrowed down the flower choices. I wanted to get your opinion on them. Oh, and we picked out some sort of weird trimmed invitations", Meredith said excitedly. "But we couldn't agree on a bridesmaid dress color."

"You asked both of them, right?", Derek asked.

"Yeah. Izzie was so excited, and Cristina didn't mind. I can't just pick one of them, you know?", Meredith asked as she ate her soup.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, I think it's great."

"Are you okay with the cake and everything? Sorry…I probably should have asked you. This is important stuff and I didn't even ask", Meredith said biting her lip.

"It's okay. I trust you", Derek assured her, kissing her cheek again. He couldn't help but kiss her tonight. When they were at work, he would always pull her aside in the hallway for a quick kiss and hug, but today they spent the whole day apart. He had only been gone for a few hours, but he missed her. He missed their little moments together, so tonight he just couldn't help himself.

"Okay", Meredith smiled. "So…we were talking about the guest list…and um, well…would you want to…invite Addison? I mean…I know we're all sort of friends, and I just thought…maybe you'd want to…if not, it's fine, but I wouldn't mind…you know, if you wanted to", Meredith rambled.

"Hmm?", Derek asked, taken aback by her suggestion.

"I…never mind…I shouldn't have said anything", Meredith started.

"Oh no…it's not that…I just…you'd be okay with that?"

Meredith nodded slightly. "Yeah. But if you think it would be rude, then don't. I don't want it to seem like we're rubbing it in her face. That would be mean, and I don't want her to hate us."

"She won't think that. I'll call her and ask. But I'm sure she'd like to visit eventually anyway, you know, see everyone", Derek told her.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, scrunching up her nose as she sniffled. "But if you change your mind, don't feel like you have to. I just thought it might be nice. But I'm really not good at stuff like this, so…"

Derek smiled. "You're amazing, Meredith. You're amazing and thoughtful and I'm completely in love with you."

Meredith rolled her eyes at his cheesiness. "I love you too", she said as she walked their bowls over to the sink. "And I believe you promised me a massage."

"I did", he agreed. "Did you take your medicine today?"

"I'm not five, Derek. And yes, I did", she laughed as they made their way back upstairs.

"Good", Derek smiled as they walked back into the bedroom. "Okay, shirt off."

Meredith giggled. "Yes, Dr. Shepherd", she said as she pulled her shirt over her head, and dropped it onto the bed, followed by her bra. Derek got her body lotion off of the dresser and came back over to the bed. Meredith rolled onto her stomach and rested her head on her pillow.

Derek squirted some lightly scented lavender lotion into his hands, massaging it through his warm palms before rubbing it up and down her back, paying extra attention to her sensitive spots that he knew all too well. They both enjoyed their intimate moments like this. For them, intimacy came in ways other than just sex. Sex was important to them, and it deepened their connection, but simple things like this were just as beneficial for their relationship. It was another way to express the love they felt for one another.

"Oh God", Meredith moaned when he began rubbing her shoulders. "Thank you, Derek."

"My pleasure", Derek said, leaning over and kissing the top of her head. "I'm happy to do it."

Derek spent almost an hour just rubbing her back. He made sure to cover every part of her, from her shoulders and spine down to her hips and tailbone. When he was finished, Meredith was completely satisfied. She rolled onto her back and stretched her body before sitting up and pulling her shirt back over her head, letting her bra fall to the floor. "That was amazing, Derek. I feel so much better", she yawned, snuggling her body close to his.

Derek kissed the top of her head, wrapping his arms around her and pulling the covers up over both of them. "You're okay with this, right? The wedding? I don't want to rush you into anything. We can wait…you know, if you wanted to hold off a year. I just don't want you to think I'm forcing you into anything", Derek said softly.

Meredith sat up and looked at him. "Derek", she said, caressing his cheek. "I…of course I'm okay with this. You're you and…we're practically married now…and this is…I feel good about this. And you know if I wasn't ready, I wouldn't be picking out wedding cakes because I'd be too busy freaking out. I'm actually excited…really excited. And I rarely get excited about things, so this is…I don't want to wait. We're going to do this, and we're getting our happy ending, Derek", Meredith said, tears filling her eyes as she took his hand in her own. "And nothing is going to stop us from getting it."

With his free hand, Derek tipped her chin up and kissed her softly. "I love you, Meredith."

"Mmm…I love you too", she smiled as several tears escaped her eyes.

"And the house…we…I know we're building it, but…do you like it? I didn't even…that was wrong. I should have asked you what you wanted. God, I feel like such an ass sometimes…it's _our_ house and I…you should have had—"

"Derek", Meredith cut him off. "Stop. Yes, you had plans drawn up, but we didn't just build that house on the paper. I had input. I was the one who changed up the entire floor plan of the upstairs, and decided to put up a fence, and have a balcony outside of our bedroom and…other things, too. I had input, Derek. We did this together. It's _our_ house…where we're going to live and raise a family and spend our lifetime together. I—for once, I know that I have a good future ahead of me. With you. That's the important part here, Derek. That I spend it with you. Nothing else matters."

"Okay", Derek breathed. "It's just…I love you so much, and I…sometimes I feel like I don't deserve you. I've put you through hell, and you still love me at the end of the day. You're gracious, and forgiving, and kind. And I just want the best for you", he said with a small smile, tears welling in his own eyes.

"You're giving me more than I ever thought I'd have, Derek. We're getting married, and we're going to have kids and live in this amazing house that we're building. That's a little more than I ever thought I'd have. I always thought I'd end up alone. Happy things never happened to people like me, but…then I met you and everything changed. And I thought that maybe…maybe I have a shot, you know? Maybe I'd met _him_. Maybe I had found someone I could call the love of my life", she said as the tears built back up in her eyes.

"And yes, we've been through hell. But Derek, you _are_ the love of my life. If I've learned anything in this past year and a half, it's that. And I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you…to call you my husband, and watch you be this amazing father. That's…to have that…it's all I need."

"Me too", Derek said softly as he pulled her closer into his arms. "God, I love you", he said as he pressed his lips against his. "I love you so much."

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I love you too. Forever."

**I felt like Derek still had some apologizing to do, just like he does on the show. Derek's mom will visit next. And yep, I'm bringing Addie back (if I decide to continue this). I loved her in 4.13. She was so amazing, and I realized just how much I missed her on the show.**

**Please review.**


	13. Mothers

**Disclaimer: If I owned Grey's Anatomy, Derek's middle name would be Michael, because that's what it is in every fanfic. And now four years of fandom have to be edited.**

**By the way...I sort of hate Derek Shepherd right now, and it took a lot out of me to make him McDreamy in this chapter.**

**Thanks to those that take the time to review. I really appreciate it.**

Mothers. Meredith wasn't particularly fond of mothers. But she was hoping Derek's would be different. In the back of her mind, she knew not to get her hopes up. She knew there was no reason why Derek's mother would be any different than any other mother. But there was—because she had raised Derek, the love of her life. So she must have done something right. Right?

Derek had spent days trying to convince Meredith to relax. But Meredith couldn't help but worry. After all, she was the home wrecker. Addison was like their daughter, and she wondered if they blamed Meredith for the demise of Derek's marriage. And that had Meredith freaking out.

As though Izzie could sense what Meredith was thinking about, she spoke. "Happy thoughts, Mer. Happy thoughts."

Meredith snapped out of her trance. "What?"

"It's going to be fine. Stop worrying", Izzie said, popping a chip into her mouth as the five of them sat in the cafeteria during their lunch break.

"Oh…I know…I'm fine", Meredith lied.

"Right", Cristina said, seeing right through Meredith's act.

"Why are you so afraid?", Alex asked, shoving a bite of his turkey sandwich into his mouth.

"She's afraid McDreamy's mommy is going to kill her in her sleep", Cristina answered for her.

"I am not", Meredith rebutted.

"You are too", George said in a sing song voice.

Meredith leaned back in her chair. "I'm not good with mothers."

"Just un-invite her", Cristina shrugged.

"I can't just un-invite her. She's flying in tomorrow morning."

"How long is she staying?", Izzie asked.

"A few days", Meredith sighed.

"Are you taking off from work?"

"Yeah. Derek is too. And it sucks because I missed three days last week because I was sick", Meredith explained. "At this rate, I'll never get any OR time."

"What are you doing when she's here?", Alex asked.

"Being a good hostess. Begging for her approval. Things like that", Meredith told them.

"There's no reason for her not to like you", Izzie assured her. "Once she sees how happy you and Derek are together, she'll love you."

George nodded. "Iz is right. It's going to be fine."

"I hope so", Meredith breathed. Their conversation was interrupted by the sounding of Meredith's pager. "Gotta go." She stood up from her chair and made her way out of the cafeteria after throwing her trash in the trashcan.

"Hey", Derek smiled as Meredith met him in the on-call room.

"Hey", she said softly. "Why, um…are we here?"

Derek shrugged. "This morning you seemed a little off. I just wanted to make sure you were okay", he said, pulling her in for a hug.

"I'm fine", she said quickly.

"Mhm", Derek smirked, taking her wrist and pulling her down on the bed next to him.

"What? I am."

"Am I going to have to beg? Because I will", Derek smiled.

Meredith let out a heavy sigh and flopped back onto the bed. "Fine. I'm nervous."

"Nervous? About what? My mom coming?", Derek asked, brushing her hair out of her face.

Meredith nodded. "Moms tend to disapprove of me", she reminded him.

"Meredith", he said softly, lying down on the bed next to her. "It's going to be fine. I promise", he said before kissing her.

She moaned at the feeling of his lips against hers. "Der."

"Hmm?"

"Work."

"What about it?"

"I have a job."

Derek laughed against her lips. "Me too."

"I have to go", she moaned.

"No time for a quickie?"

"Nope", Meredith giggled. "I'm not going to be here for a few days, so I need to make myself useful so they don't fire me while I'm gone."

Meredith and Derek both sat up on the bed. "They would never fire you", Derek laughed, kissing her again.

"And how do you know that?"

"Because if they fire you, I'd quit. And then they'd be forced to re-hire both of us", Derek explained, causing Meredith to giggle.

"There it is", Derek smiled, hugging her again.

"What?"

"The giggle—the Meredith giggle", Derek said, rubbing his hands up and down her arms.

"Cheesy", she laughed again.

"Are you okay, Mer?", he asked, wanting to make sure she wasn't worrying about anything before they went on their days.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. It'll be okay. Just...she's nice right?"

"Yes. She's nice. And she's going to love you", he assured her for the thousandth time.

"Okay. I trust you", she said, kissing him again before they left the on-call room hand in hand.

"Thank you", he smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too", she grinned as they unlinked hands and went their separate ways down the corridor.

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When they arrived home later on that night after their shift, Meredith and Derek cleaned the house. Again. Izzie, Alex, and Derek had told her numerous times that the house couldn't get any cleaner, but Meredith wasn't convinced. She cleaned the house from top to bottom, then did it all over again.

After vacuuming the carpet for the tenth time, Derek decided it was time to stop. "Mer", he called.

"Yeah?", she yelled from the kitchen, giving the fridge a once over. She was checking to make sure nothing was expired, and that it was well stocked. Izzie had baked muffins, cobbler, and pie for his mother's arrival. Meredith said having baked goods made the house look homier, so last night, Izzie baked her ass off, which Meredith appreciated.

"I think we're good…the house is clean."

"I just want to wipe off the baseboards one more time, and make sure everything is okay in the guest room", Meredith said as he entered the kitchen.

"Meredith, you did all of those things. And then you made me do them. And then you went back and did them again. I assure you, the house is clean. Even if it wasn't, my mom wouldn't care. She raised five kids…the house was never spotless", Derek smiled.

Meredith just stared at him with an adorable, pouty look on her face. "Derek."

"Meredith", he mimicked.

"Just let me dust the laundry room one more time", Meredith said, walking toward the door.

Derek caught her arm before she could escape. "Mer, my mom isn't even going to go in the laundry room, and I guarantee she won't care if it's dusted or not."

"I just—", Meredith rebutted before Derek could cut her off.

"Don't make me middle name you", Derek smirked.

"Do you even know my middle name?", Meredith giggled.

Derek paused for a moment. "No", he said sadly.

Meredith smiled and kissed him softly. "Aww, feeling bad now?"

"Yeah, actually. I am", he confessed. Meredith was the love of his life, and he felt like he barely knew her. "I'm sorry."

Meredith took his hand in her own and led him out of the kitchen, realizing the house was clean enough. She could always clean again tomorrow before Derek's mom arrived. "That's okay. I don't know yours either."

"How do we not know these things about each other?", Derek asked as they walked up the steps toward the bedroom.

"I don't know", Meredith shrugged.

"I feel bad", Derek said softly, pulling her into his arms.

"Elizabeth", Meredith smiled. "My middle name is Elizabeth."

"Hmm...Meredith Elizabeth. Beautiful name…", he said, kissing her softly.

"What's yours?", she asked as she shimmied out of her clothes and quickly changed into her pajamas.

Derek did the same, unbuttoning his shirt. "Christopher", he said, pulling off his jeans and pulling on some sweats.

"Really?"

"Really", Derek said as they pulled back the covers and got into bed. "Why?"

"I don't know. I just wouldn't have thought Christopher", she yawned, cuddling her body closer to Derek.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "Why? What'd you think it was?"

"Not a clue", Meredith laughed. "How did I not know your middle name? I've known you all this time, and I feel like I know nothing about you."

"Me either", he smiled as he looked into her bright green eyes. He loved her eyes. It was one of the first things he noticed about her that night they met at Joe's. And ever since, he could tell exactly what she was thinking simply by looking into her eyes. They told her story…but he wanted to learn even more about her. "Tell me things."

"What?", she giggled.

"I just…anything. Tell me anything", he said, kissing the top of her head.

"About what?"

"You."

Meredith bit her lip. "Hmm…do you want to know my favorite novel or my favorite band?", she teased.

"Cute", he smiled.

"I don't know what to say", she confessed. "Should I start at birth, and work my way up?"

"I know your birthday—that's a start. July 29th", Derek smiled.

"Well, at least you know that much", she laughed. "And yours is April 2nd."

"Yep. I'm glad we know that. It might be helpful in the future, you know, when one of us has a birthday", Derek joked.

"True", Meredith agreed. "Oh, here's something…I wasn't due until mid-August."

"You were premature?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I was fine though, just a little small…four pounds."

"Aww, Mer", he said, kissing the top of her head. "I bet you were the most beautiful baby in the nursery."

Meredith just rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Sure."

"What? It's true."

"Just out of curiosity…so I know what I'm getting myself into…how big were you when you were born?"

"How much did I weigh?"

"Yeah."

Derek shrugged. "I think I was almost nine pounds."

"Okay. That's a joke, right? You're joking?"

"No. Why?"

"Can a person come back from that? My God…", Meredith said, still trying to fathom the idea.

"Wait…why…?"

"Your beast children are going to ruin my vagina. Consider it ruined. And unusable."

"Meredith", Derek said as he attempted to hold back a laugh. "Think of it this way…you were tiny. I was big. Maybe that means we'll make average sized babies."

"I hope so. If I have to push a Thanksgiving turkey out of my body…a very small part of my body…a part of my body that you love for its…smallness…there's going to be hell to pay."

"It'll be fine. I promise. We don't have to worry about that for a while anyway", he assured her.

"Okay…I'll let it go for now" Meredith laughed. "And you probably had a full set of hair, right?"

"Dark curls from day one", Derek laughed.

"Good. I was born bald, so hopefully they'll get your hair genes."

"Well, they'll definitely be geniuses—brain surgeon material", Derek smiled.

" Obviously", Meredith joked. "Brain surgeons with God complexes as big as their father's."

"You're cute…with the teasing and all", Derek smirked, kissing her softly. "So what else should I know about you?"

"Um…" She thought for a moment. "I had pink hair in high school. And I wore a lot of black. And I didn't go to my prom."

"You didn't?"

"Nope…And I'm going to take a wild guess and say that you did."

"Uh, yeah. I did. I think I went to four of them actually", Derek laughed.

"Four?"

"Well, five. If you count the hospital prom", Derek grinned. "That was by far the most memorable."

"I bet it was", Meredith smirked. "So were you the charming, handsome, football player who went with captain of the cheerleading squad?"

Derek laughed. "No actually. I was in the band…I played the saxophone. I had acne…and an afro. Far from football player. My mom made me go with my sisters' friends."

"Hmm…who knew the pink haired, angry girl with the black nail polish would fall for the bank geek with the afro", Meredith giggled, looking down at the engagement ring on her finger.

"Yeah, we probably wouldn't have been friends in high school", Derek laughed as he kissed her.

"Mmm", Meredith moaned against his lips. "Probably not."

"I would have asked you to the prom", Derek smiled softly.

Meredith laughed. "And I would have said no…but thanks anyway", kissing him again.

"I would have convinced you", he murmured against her lips.

"You are very convincing", she giggled, running her fingers through his hair.

"I am", he said, nibbling on her earlobe. "Think I can convince you to have sex tonight?"

"I'm tired", Meredith sighed.

"Fine…I guess we'll just have it tomorrow then", Derek said casually, awaiting her reaction.

"There is no way we're having sex when your mother is across the hall", Meredith told him definitively. "That would be weird…and wrong…so wrong."

"Well then we'll have to wait three days."

"I…we've never gone that long without it—well, not for a while anyway", Meredith said, knowing she would give in to him. Three days was far too long for them to go without.

"Which is why I think we should probably have some mind blowing sex now…you know, to make up for the lost days", he explained as he began to suck on that sensitive spot on her neck.

"Hmm…maybe you're right", she moaned, tilting her head back so he could have better access.

"Told you I was convincing", he breathed. His hot breath on her neck sent chills up her spine. And when he ran his tongue over the spot behind her ear, she lost it.

"Oh God", she moaned, pulling him on top of her, running her nails down his back. "I blame it on your tongue."

"My tongue", he laughed, pressing his lips against hers once again.

"Mhm…very talented", she giggled.

He wrapped his arms around her, and flipped them over so she was on top of him. "That's not the only talented part about me", he smiled, running his hands down her body, memorizing every curve of her small figure.

"True", she said softly, kissing him again. She could already feel his erection growing beneath her.

Derek looked up at her and smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too", she whispered.

"I guess we'll finish this "getting to know you" conversation tomorrow", he laughed, slipping his fingers into her panties.

"I have pictures I'll show you. That'll make up for it." She kissed him again, gasping when she felt his warm hands rubbing her ass.

"Looking forward to it."

"But now—sex."

"Sex." He wrapped his arms around her, gently rolling her onto her back. He kissed her again, slipping his tongue into her mouth. Passion radiated between their bodies. Their love for one another growing deeper with every caress.

They spent the night making love to one another, only stopping when physical exhaustion took over and their bodies begged for sleep. Derek pulled her naked, sweaty body close to his, and together they slept for the few remaining hours until the alarm clock would wake them up for the start of a new day.

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"You're going to be late", Meredith said from the bathroom doorway. She was standing there in Derek's tee shirt with her toothbrush in her mouth, her sex hair still all over the place from their late night under the sheets.

"You're the one who insisted we go four rounds last night", Derek laughed, buttoning his shirt.

"You weren't exactly protesting", she reminded him with a mouthful of toothpaste.

"You were naked. I can't say no when you're naked."

She spit into the sink. "Hmm…I sort of remember you being naked too…now go."

"I'm going." Derek walked over to her and kissed her cheek. "You smell like sex."

"I'm getting in the shower in a minute", she laughed. "Go…I don't want you to be late."

"Going", he said, walking out of the room. "I love you."

"Love you too", she called back before making her way across the hall. Hopefully a shower would help her clear her head. She needed to be on top of her game when Derek's mom arrived. Looking post-coital was never a good thing when meeting your future mother-in-law.

After showering, she put on a pair of jeans and a long sleeve shirt. It may not have been Addison-classy, but Meredith didn't want to pretend to be somebody she wasn't. She was going to be herself when his mother was here. She was going to be the Meredith that her son fell in love with.

She went downstairs and made a pot of coffee. After pouring herself a cup, she grabbed a muffin and made her way to the living room, occasionally peeking out the window to see if they were here. Yesterday after talking with Derek, she felt better. But now, with each passing minute, she was starting to freak out again.

"Hey", Alex said, appearing in the archway of the living room, Izzie standing next to him. They walked over and plopped down next to her on the couch.

"Hey. I thought you guys had work today", she yawned.

"We're on-call tonight so we don't have to be in until noon", Izzie explained.

"Ready for judgment day?", Alex joked, earning him a nudge in the arm from Izzie.

"No. I'm not", Meredith laughed before turning serious. "I just want her to accept me for me, you know? I can't be…Addison. I'm just…me. I snore, I don't cook, I put my hair in a ponytail every day. And that's—"

"—Why Derek loves you", Izzie finished for her. "He loves you because you're you. And that's all he expects you to be. Okay?"

"Okay", Meredith smiled. "And thank you for the pep talk. It helped."

"Good", Izzie said with a nod.

"Crap…they're here", Meredith said, standing up from the couch.

Alex patted her back. "Deep breaths, Mer."

"Right. Okay", Meredith nodded. "I can do this."

Derek and his mother approached the front door. At first glance, Meredith had to admit that there was nothing frightening about the woman. She was around 5'4", and had shoulder-length brown hair, 

nothing like her son's dark curls. She actually looked…friendly. "Hello, dear. You must be Meredith", Mrs. Shepherd said with a warm smile, pulling Meredith in for a hug.

"Hi, Mrs. Shepherd", Meredith said shyly, wringing her hands together.

"Oh, sweetheart, call me Linda…or mom…whichever you're more comfortable with", she said kindly. "And who are these two?"

"Oh, um…these are my friends, Izzie and Alex", Meredith said, pointing to each of them. "They live here with me."

"Pleasure to meet you both", she said, hugging both of them. Apparently, Linda Shepherd was a hugger. Meredith wasn't used to the whole affectionate mother thing, but she could definitely get used to it.

"You too", Izzie said politely. "Well, I guess we'll be going…leave you guys alone. Alex and I had plans to go out to breakfast anyway."

Alex looked at her confusedly. They had no intention of going out to breakfast, but Alex went along with it. "Right, yeah. We uh…I guess we'll see you later", he said with a smile.

"Have a nice time. It was very nice to meet you both", Linda said with a smile.

"You too", Alex smiled. Izzie grabbed the keys off of the table, and together she and Alex made their way out of the house. Meredith secretly wished she could join them, but she knew she had to do this. She had to do this for Derek, for their relationship, for their future.

"Would you like some coffee, Mom?", Derek asked, taking off her coat and putting it onto the rack.

Linda smiled. "I would love some, dear."

The three of them made their way into the kitchen. Meredith and Linda sat at the table while Derek got coffee for each of them. "It's so nice to finally meet you, Meredith. I'm glad my son finally decided to call me. The least he could do was tell me he was engaged", Linda laughed, shaking her head.

Derek sighed. "Sorry, mom", he said, walking over to the table with their mugs. He took a seat next to Meredith and kissed her cheek, letting her know that he was there for her.

"Oh, I know how it is. The hospital keeps you busy", Mrs. Shepherd nodded, glancing over to Meredith. "You're awfully quiet, dear."

"Oh…sorry. I um…I'm sorry", Meredith said, nervously biting her lip.

Linda reached across the table and squeezed Meredith's hand. "Honey, please don't be nervous. I'm not going to bite. My son obviously adores you. I've only been here for ten minutes, and I can see that."

Meredith smiled. "I love him too."

"So Derek tells me you're building a house", Linda said happily.

"We are", Meredith smiled. "It's…the land is amazing. We're really excited about it."

"That's wonderful, dear. It's about time Derek moved out of that trailer Nancy told me about."

"Don't listen to Nancy. The trailer is great", Derek laughed.

"Whatever you say, dear", Linda laughed. "So Meredith, what do your friends do?"

Meredith nodded. "They work with me, actually. So we're sort of always together, but it's nice. We're all close friends."

"It's always nice to be friends with those you work with", Linda agreed. "You're living here too, right Derek?"

"Yeah. Unofficially, but yeah. I live here", Derek nodded.

Meredith felt her cheeks burning. She knew that both she and Derek were adults. And yes, they were engaged, but something still felt weird about the fact that Mrs. Shepherd knew they were sleeping together. She didn't know how strict she was about such things, or if she thought it was improper to sleep together before marriage.

Almost as if Linda was reading her mind, she laughed. "Oh, Meredith. Don't be embarrassed. This is 2008. I know you're both sexual beings. Don't feel like you have to explain…"

"Oh God", Derek groaned. This conversation suddenly took a turn down the path of awkwardness.

"Oh hush, Derek. I'm just saying, I know. And I don't mind. You're getting married. And you're clearly in love with each other", Linda explained.

"Calling your son a sexual being—definitely a good ice breaker", Derek joked, resting his hand on Meredith's thigh.

"Good. Now that we've gotten that out of the way, I think it's time for you to leave us alone so Meredith and I can talk."

"Oh…I…he…", Meredith said, clearly in a state of panic. She didn't want Derek to leave. But deep down, she knew that she and Mrs. Shepherd would eventually have to talk without Derek there. It was like a cardinal rule of meeting the future mother-in-law.

"Okay. I have to call the hospital to check on some patients anyway", Derek said with a smile. He leaned over and kissed Meredith's cheek. "Relax", he whispered into her ear.

Meredith smiled at him and nodded. Derek stood up and made his way out of the room. "Go easy on her, mom", he joked.

Linda glared at him. "Go", she smiled, shooing him out of the room.

There they were. Meredith and her future mother-in-law sitting at her kitchen table. Without Derek. Meredith looked at the woman and smiled. _This should be fun_, she thought to herself.

**I know this was short, but I didn't want to cram Mrs. Shepherd's visit all in one chapter. I really want her and Meredith to talk about things. And I made Linda a nice mom, not Ellis-like. She's actually based on my sweet neighbor that I've known all my life. :)**

**Please review. I'd really appreciate it.**


	14. She Saved You

**Disclaimer: Derek is being ass-y. Rose won't leave. And Ava is a psycho. If I owned the show, none of those things would be true.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them!**

There they were. Meredith and her future mother-in-law sitting at her kitchen table. Without Derek. Meredith looked at the woman and smiled. _This should be fun_, she thought to herself.

"So Meredith…tell me about yourself", Linda Shepherd said, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Oh…I um…I work at Seattle Grace. I'm sure Derek told you that already though", Meredith said quietly. "I'm thinking about going to neurosurgery…but not—not because of Derek—I just…I've always had an interest in that field so I think I might. But I haven't decided yet", she rambled.

"That's wonderful dear. I've always found the brain to be fascinating", Linda said kindly.

"Yeah", Meredith agreed, biting her lip. She really had no idea what to say to this woman.

"Meredith, don't be nervous. I just want to get to know you. You're going to be my daughter-in-law—my only daughter-in-law."

Meredith smiled. "Sorry…this is, um…I'm not exactly good with the whole family thing."

"Oh sweetheart, I already consider you my daughter. I want you to feel comfortable talking to me", Linda said with a warm smile.

"I have to tell you…this whole mother thing is new to me", Meredith said nervously. "My mother wasn't exactly…um…mothering."

"I had no idea. I'm sorry, Meredith", she said sadly.

"Oh…no it's fine. It's…I've made peace with my mother…she died a few months ago."

Mrs. Shepherd stood up from her chair and walked around the table.

"Oh", Meredith said quickly as Linda pulled her in for a hug. Surprisingly, Meredith felt comfortable with the woman. There was something so nurturing and warm about her that Meredith loved. It was nice to know that Linda wasn't comparing her to Addison or judging her for her involvement in ending an eleven year marriage. Because that would make for more awkward tension than Meredith could handle.

"I'd love to talk to you about your family…but only if you wouldn't mind", she said gently, taking a seat.

"Oh I…that's…it's a long and sorted story that would result in you taking your son back to New York…far far away from me."

Linda laughed. "Honey, nothing you could say would ever make me disapprove of you. I happen to think you're a lovely woman. My Derek is lucky to have found someone like you", she said with a genuine smile.

Meredith smiled. "I'm lucky to have him. He's just…before he came along, I didn't believe in any of that stuff…love or lifetimes or any of that. But then I met him, and I did. And I know that we, well, with Addison…things got…"

"Oh sweetheart, I know. I don't want you to think I blame you for that. Derek and Addie…they were happy, but somewhere along the line, Derek lost the sparkle. He always looked sad. And then when Derek found—well, you know the rest", Linda sighed. "I've forgiven Addison and Mark. It killed me to know what they put my son through, but I had to let it go. We're human. We make mistakes. And if you think about it, you're all better off for it. Derek and Mark have healed their friendship. And Addie is very happy."

"Oh, so um, you still keep in touch with Addison", Meredith asked. Not that it bothered her, she just wanted to keep up the conversation, hoping it would help break the ice a bit.

"Oh yes…Addie's parents and I have managed to stay close. When they visit New York, they always come to see me. And I talk to Addison on the phone occasionally", Linda explained with a smile. "She was, and in many ways still is, one of my daughters."

"That's um…very big of you", Meredith nodded. "I mean, usually that sort of thing doesn't happen. Not that I don't like Addison. Addison and I were sort of friends when she left. We're on good terms."

"I'm glad to hear that, dear. Life is too short to hold grudges."

Meredith nodded in agreement. "Did Derek tell you…we um, she's coming to the wedding."

"That's wonderful, Meredith. I'm glad that you've managed to be adults about this. I know everything that has happened in the past wasn't easy on you", Linda said sympathetically.

"No…it wasn't", Meredith sighed. "There were times when I thought I'd have to let go…but there was always something telling me not to give up. That one day, it might just be okay."

"I'm glad you didn't give up. My Derek…the sparkle is back. And I have you to thank for that, Meredith. Without you, he wouldn't be the son I know him to be. You saved my boy, Meredith. You gave him a second chance. And for that, I will always be grateful to you", Linda said genuinely, tears coming to her eyes.

Meredith was taken aback by Linda's honesty. Had Meredith known this would go so well, she wouldn't have obsessed and worried about it for weeks. "Oh. Thank you. I um…that means so much to me."

"Okay, enough about Derek. Back to you." Mrs. Shepherd looked at Meredith with kind eyes. "I want to know you, dear. So anything you want to share, I'm all ears", she smiled.

Meredith took a deep breath. "Okay, well, I was born here in Seattle…"

And that's how Meredith spent the rest of her morning. She poured her heart out to Linda Shepherd, a woman she'd only known for a few hours. But in those few hours, Meredith had shared more than she had ever planned to share. Something about Linda comforted Meredith. She knew that she could be open and honest, almost like her own personal confessional. They talked dead mother, dead stepmother, even her poor excuse for a father. The story just kept coming out and Mrs. Shepherd listened to her every word.

By the time Derek came into the kitchen, bored from waiting for close to three hours and wanting lunch, there had been joy and sadness, laughter and tears. Derek was stunned to say the least. Meredith rarely opened herself up to anybody, and here she was, spilling her heart out to her future mother-in-law whom she had only been introduced to a few hours ago.

"Mer", Derek said concernedly. "You okay?"

Meredith smiled. "Yeah. I'm good. We were just talking."

"This girl is something special, Derek."

"I know", Derek smiled, leaning over and kissing the top of Meredith's head. "And I'm going to spend the rest of my life with her."

"Good. Because I don't know what I would do if you were to let her go", Linda joked. "So would you like me to make lunch?"

"I can do it, mom. You're not here to cook for us", Derek told her.

"Nonsense, dear. I would love to make something for the three of us."

"I'll help", Meredith offered.

Derek smirked at her in disbelief. "_You're_ going to help?"

"Shut up", Meredith laughed, smacking him softly. "She doesn't know where anything is, and I could help—try to help."

"I would love your help", Linda said kindly.

"What about me?", Derek joked. "Are you kicking me out again?"

"We're not done talking yet. Why don't you go call Mark to see if we can get together? I want to spend time with my boys while I'm here." Linda kissed her son on the cheek. "Now go into the living room and relax."

"I've been relaxing all day", Derek reminded her jokingly. "Do you have any idea how boring it is without you?"

"Stop whining and listen to your mother", Meredith told him with a smile.

"Bossy", Derek said, kissing her cheek.

"She needs to be bossy if she's dealing with you", Linda joked. She stood up from her chair and walked over to the sink to wash her hands.

"I like the bossing, especially your naked bossing", Derek whispered into Meredith's ear, knowing his mother was far enough away not to hear them.

Meredith blushed. "Go…I love you."

"I love you too", he said, kissing her softly and making his way out of the kitchen once again.

Derek plopped down onto the couch and pulled out his cell phone. After dialing the familiar number, he waited for the answer.

"Hello?"

"Hey. Are you busy?"

"Hey man", Mark said. "No. I just finished a surgery. Why? What's up?"

"My mom wants to see you", Derek laughed.

"Okay", Mark smiled. "When did you want to…"

Derek shrugged. "Maybe we could spend the morning with her. I know Meredith already misses work. She could go in for a few hours."

"Sounds good", Mark agreed. "So…how's it going? Any bloodshed?"

"No", Derek laughed. "Actually, they're getting along. I've been kicked out of the kitchen—twice."

"Seriously?"

"She's helping her with lunch now."

"Meredith, as in Meredith Grey?"

"I know. I'm surprised too." Derek got off the couch and peered into the kitchen, seeing Meredith and his mother laughing as they made sandwiches together. "I thought for sure Mer would have a hard time with this, but it's been good so far."

"That's good isn't it?"

"Yeah", Derek smiled. "It is."

"Damn…911. Gotta go, man. So I call you later about tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure", Derek nodded. "Bye." Derek smiled. It was nice to have Mark back in his life. When Mark first moved to Seattle, he never expected to be friends with him again. As Meredith would say, there was too much water under the thing. But over time, Derek got his brother back. He and Mark had been friends all their lives, and he couldn't imagine going through his life without him. Though neither would admit it to each other, they were thankful for their friendship.

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Later that night, Derek and Linda had convinced Meredith to go out to Joe's with Cristina and George. Meredith agreed, knowing Derek would want to spend some time with his mother. And of course, her friends would want details.

"Hey guys", Meredith greeted them. She took a seat on the stool next to Cristina.

"How is she?", George asked.

Meredith smiled. "Actually, I sort of love her."

"What?", Cristina asked in disbelief. "Why?"

"She's just…nice. I talk to her for three hours this morning—and then more when we made lunch together."

George choked on his beer. "You made lunch? And you're bonding with her?"

"Shut up", Meredith said, pretending to be offended.

"Izzie and Alex are going to be sorry they missed this", Cristina said, shaking her head.

"Did I hear you correctly? You and Derek's mom are hitting it off?", Joe asked, refilling George's beer.

"We are", Meredith smiled.

"I'm impressed", Joe nodded. "What'll it be?"

"Just water. Thanks, Joe", Meredith told him.

"Water? Okay, seriously, what the hell happened to you?", Cristina asked.

"I'd rather not go home drunk and wake up with a hangover. That wouldn't be good", Meredith said, shaking her head.

"So what are you and Shepherd's mom talking about?", George asked.

Meredith shrugged. "My life…"

"Damn. Why isn't she here drinking with us?", Cristina joked.

"Why am I friends with either of you?", Meredith joked.

"I'm just shocked...we all thought for sure she'd kick your ass", Cristina shrugged.

"I'm glad everything's good, Mer", George smiled.

"Me too."

"Sure", Meredith rolled her eyes.

"No really. I am. You're lucky to have a mother-in-law that's not Mama Burke-like", Cristina told her. "Be thankful."

"Believe me I am." Meredith took a sip of her water. "She's just…sweet. And easy to talk to…it's sort of strange, the whole supportive mother thing, but I like it."

"Good", George smiled. "So do you miss work?"

"Tomorrow Derek and Mark are taking her out to brunch or something, so I'm going in for a few hours. It sucks sitting at home."

"McSteamy gets along with Mama Shepherd?"

"Yeah. Addison too…oh, by the way, Derek called her and she's coming to the wedding", Meredith said. George and Cristina gave her odd looks.

"What? They were married for eleven years. They're friends", Meredith reasoned. "Stop looking at me like that."

"It's just that the ex-wife doesn't usually come to her ex-husband's wedding", George laughed.

"Don't think of it as weird. Think of it as…mature", Meredith nodded.

"Fine. That's very mature of you, Meredith", Cristina said sarcastically.

"Thank you."

"Why don't we make her a third maid of honor?", Cristina joked.

"Oh that reminds me—Izzie booked a dress fitting."

"What? Why? The wedding isn't until mid-July", Cristina asked.

"That's what I told her. But apparently, people do these things in advance. It's already February", Meredith shrugged.

"This wedding is going to be small, right? Not flocks of Shepherds roaming the land?", Cristina asked.

Meredith laughed. "Nice one—with the Shepherd jokes. And yes, it's going to be a small wedding. His family is big, but we want them there. Derek and I want the people we're close with to come. But it's still going to be a very small ceremony."

"Didn't you say he had fourteen nieces and nephews?", George asked.

"Yeah, but I want them to come. I don't want Aunt Meredith to be some mystery woman they never meet, you know?"

"I'm going to be the supportive maid of honor and go along with everything", Cristina said. "But I'm telling you right now that I'm not wearing some fluffy pink dress in front of a hundred people."

"Mer wouldn't pick pink", George said, shaking his head.

"I thought you knew me better than that, Cristina", Meredith laughed. "No fluffy pink. And it's not going to be a hundred people."

"You know that Izzie is going to want to turn this into Barbie's dream wedding, right?", Cristina asked, taking a sip of her beer.

"Not happening." Meredith shook her head. "And we can pick something nice that you can wear again."

"You mean for all the parties I go to because of all my free time", Cristina laughed.

"Just for that, I'm going to pick something with bows and sequences for you two", Meredith smiled. "Yeah. I'm thinking that would be nice."

"You wouldn't."

"Oh I would", Meredith nodded. "Can't you just picture them, George? Big bows…sleeves…lace…"

"Beautiful", George joked.

"Fine. I appreciate that you're making the dresses practical", Cristina sighed in resignation.

"Thank you", Meredith smiled.

"So what color are you thinking?", George asked.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know. Yellow maybe?"

"Oh God", Cristina groaned.

"You're going to hate every color, aren't you?"

"Probably, yeah", she admitted.

"This should be a fun trip to the bridal shop", Meredith said rolling her eyes.

--

"Do you want some pie, mom?", Derek called to his mother, who was sitting in the living room.

"Sure, dear", Linda called back.

Derek entered the living room with two slices of pie. "Did Meredith make this?"

"No", Derek laughed. "Izzie did. Meredith really isn't much of a cook, but she tries."

"It's the effort that counts", Linda laughed. "So…now that we're alone, I just wanted to tell you how much I love that girl. There's just something about her that's…so genuine and lovely. I'm so happy for the two of you."

"Thank you, mom. That…it really means a lot. Meredith was worried about this—really worried."

"I know she was. But I think everything is okay now", Linda assured him. "We talked. She had a lot to say."

"She's hard to get to know. Mer rarely spills her heart to anyone. Sometimes I feel like I know nothing about her. I'm glad she feels comfortable around you", Derek smiled.

"She has quite a story", Linda nodded.

"Yeah", Derek said sadly. "Not a happy one either…"

"But it is _now_. And that's what matters—that you love her and make her happy. She deserves happiness, Derek."

"I know", Derek nodded. "And I'm going to spend my life making sure she knows how much I love her. This is—she's it for me mom."

"I know, dear. And believe me, Meredith feels the same way. Whenever she mentioned you, she couldn't help but smile. And she told me all about the house you're building. She seems so excited about it."

"It's the perfect house, mom. We can go visit the land if you wanted to. The builders already started working", Derek smiled.

"I'd love to sweetheart. And I also want to see the notorious trailer that Nancy hates so much", she laughed.

"It's a great trailer—the best airstream out there. Even Meredith likes it, and she's not really…an outdoorsy girl", Derek laughed.

"Meredith tells me the wedding is outdoors…"

Derek nodded. "Yeah. The land out by the trailer seems to be the only outdoor place she doesn't mind. It's going to be small. Meredith…she really doesn't have any biological family—well, her stepsisters."

"Lexie and Molly", Linda smiled.

"Wow. She told you everything, didn't she?", Derek laughed.

"I think she did", Linda agreed.

"So it's just going to be the people we work with at the hospital. And of course you, the girls and their families."

"Are you sure, dear? We have a large family, and I know you and Meredith wanted to keep it small…"

"Oh, Meredith wants them to come. She wants all you guys to be there. They're going to be her family too, and she wants to meet them", Derek assured her. He and Meredith had talked about who they wanted at the wedding. Though the size of Derek's family was a little overwhelming, it was important to Meredith that she meet them. After all, they were Derek's loved ones, and were now going to be a part of her life.

"Oh well, okay then. That's great, Derek", Linda said with a smile. "So…when can I expect a grandchild?", she hinted.

Derek laughed. "I don't know how soon we want to have kids. But we definitely want two. With our careers, I think two is a good number for us. Mer…she just…motherhood scares her. Her mother wasn't exactly…and her father—he left when she was five…"

"I know. Meredith told me", Linda nodded.

"She's just afraid that she won't be able to do it, that she'll turn out like her mother."

"Oh I don't see that happening", Linda said sincerely.

Derek smiled. "I know. As soon as she becomes a mom, she's going to fall right into the mommy role", he laughed. "One day when we're ready, we will."

"Having children is a big decision…it'll change your lives forever—for the better, of course", Linda smiled, taking her son's hand. "But it doesn't come without sacrifice."

"I know", Derek nodded in understanding. "But I'm willing to do whatever it takes. Last year I um…after Meredith almost died…I just—I questioned a lot of things. I wasn't sure if I was strong enough to handle everything. Meredith doesn't like to be taken care of, but I couldn't help myself. I had to make sure she was okay and I hovered—all the time I hovered."

"Well, Derek, that's understandable. You love her. It's only natural for you to want to protect her."

"I think that's when things started getting tough. I always wanted to be there for her, but Meredith…she never wanted to talk about it. And whenever I tried to help, she would pull away. Then Richard was supposed to retire, and I was being considered for his position. I thought I would have to choose…choose between Meredith and my career." Derek paused before continuing. "And for a while, I really thought that becoming chief would be easier than trying to have a future with Meredith. We both stopped trying…she kept pulling away and I let her."

Linda just nodded at allowed Derek to continue on. Earlier today, she had gotten some insight from Meredith, but now she wanted to hear Derek's perspective. "Does Meredith know that you were offered the position?"

"Yeah, she did. And she was completely supportive of me. But when Richard gave me the position, Meredith and I…we had already sort of broken up. Even still, I couldn't take it. I realized that I didn't want it. I wanted Meredith. Becoming chief…it just didn't matter anymore", he shrugged.

"You realized that she was more important to you", Linda nodded in understanding. "Do you think you'll ever take the position if it's offered to you again?"

"As of right now, no." Derek shook his head. "I've seen what being chief does to your personal life. Meredith and I…we want our family to come first. And if that means making changes, we'll do it."

"It makes me so proud to hear you say that, dear. Family should always be the main priority. While you both love your careers, nothing compares to the love you feel for your children", Linda said with a smile.

"Being a father is…I've always wanted to have kids, and I can't imagine having them with anyone but Meredith", Derek smiled.

"A few weeks ago, she was working in Peds. We were supposed to meet up for lunch. When she didn't show, I looked around and found her up in the nursery. She was sitting in the rocking chair, holding this baby girl. The mother was recovering after a C-section, and there was no father so Mer…she just sat there, rocking the baby. It was…she just looked so natural holding her. It felt right…seeing her with a baby" Derek smiled at the thought. "She's going to be a great mom. I just wish she had a little more faith in herself."

"Oh Derek, every woman feels that way. Even I did at first. But when I held each of you for the first time, I knew…I knew I could do this", Linda smiled, kissing her son's cheek. "And Meredith is going to make a wonderful mother."

"Thank you mom. I…that means a lot to me", Derek said with a sincere smile.

"I'm glad that you're so happy, sweetheart. And I know Meredith is the reason I have my son back. She saved you, Derek."

"Yeah", Derek said with a smile. "She really did."

**So this was originally longer, but I broke it up into two chapters, otherwise it would be over 20 pages on Word. I have half of the next one written, so hopefully I'll have it up soon.**

**Please review. I'd really appreciate it.**

**Happy Almost Grey's Day! :)**


	15. Baby Pictures

**Disclaimer: Shonda is brilliant. If I owned the show, I wouldn't have been able to come up with something so beautiful for Meredith and Derek in the season four finale.**

**Thanks for the reviews! Do people still like this story? Yes? No? Let me know…**

"I'm glad that you're so happy, sweetheart. And I know Meredith is the reason I have my son back. She saved you, Derek."

"Yeah", Derek said with a smile. "She really did."

"Hey", Meredith said after she opened the front door and put her coat on the rack.

"How was Joe's?", Derek asked with a smile.

Meredith entered the room and sat down on the couch next to him. "It was good. What did you two do?"

"Derek cooked for me", Linda smiled.

"Your son is a very good cook", Meredith giggled. "I'm not much help in the kitchen."

"Use that to your advantage", Linda joked.

Meredith laughed. "I do, believe me."

"Meredith can reheat leftovers better than anyone I've ever known. Although I'm trying to wean her off the microwave", Derek joked.

Meredith looked at him with a wrinkled brow. "Wean?", she asked with a smile.

"Maybe wean isn't the right word", Derek laughed, kissing her cheek.

Linda watched as they joked with each other. She could only imagine the love between the two of them. She was proud that her son had found the love of his life and had been given a second chance. And she was forever grateful to Meredith for giving her son that chance. Just looking at the two of them, Derek's mother knew they would make it.

"So mom, Mark and I decided that we're going to take you to the small café by the hospital tomorrow. And then, if you wouldn't mind, Richard wanted to see you", Derek explained.

"Oh that's fine dear. I'm looking forward to it", Linda smiled. "I should probably get to bed soon. It's been a long day."

"Sure", Derek nodded, taking his mother's hand. The three of them made their way upstairs to Alex's room, which would be serving as Linda's guest room. "I hope this is okay…", Meredith said, biting her lip.

"It's lovely, thank you", Linda smiled.

"And the bathroom—well, you know where it is already", Meredith said, tucking some hair behind her ears. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask."

Linda nodded. "I'll be fine. Goodnight, dears." She pulled them each into a hug. "Oh, before I forget…I have baby pictures…in case Meredith is interested. I want you to keep them to show your children one day. I have plenty more at home."

"I would love them", Meredith said with a cheeky grin.

"Mom", Derek laughed. "That's like blackmail."

"Shut up", Meredith giggled.

Linda walked over to her bag and pulled out a blue photo album. "Here you go. Enjoy."

"Thank you", Meredith smiled, accepting the book and holding it against her chest.

"Night mom", Derek smiled as he and Meredith made their way across the hall toward their own bedroom.

"So…", Derek began as he shut the door.

"Hmm?", she asked, gently placing the baby book on the bed.

"You okay?", he asked, wrapping his arms around her.

Meredith smiled and kissed him softly. "Yeah. I don't know why I freaked out."

"So I was right?", he asked with a smirk.

"Yes", she sighed. "You were right."

"Told you."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Shut up."

"I missed you today", he said, kissing her again before letting her go.

"I was in the kitchen for most of it", she giggled.

"I know. But I couldn't steal you away and have my way with you like I usually do", he joked.

Meredith unbuttoned her jeans and wiggled out of them. "Too bad", she teased.

"Evil", he smiled, shaking his head.

"I know." She pulled her sweater over her head and unclasped her bra. "It's a shame your mother is across the hall, because I'm horny and standing here in my panties."

"You know…we could…if you could keep quiet", he said, removing his own clothes.

"What does that mean?", she giggled.

"It means you're loud. Don't get me wrong—I love that you're…vocal. But I'd rather my mom not hear you", he laughed.

"Shut up", she said, hitting his chest.

"Come on, Mer. Please…" He gave her his best McDreamy smile before kissing her.

"We had sex four times last night. Is that not enough?", she murmured against his lips, her breasts pressed against his bare chest.

"You should know by now that I can never get enough of you…especially when you do that", he sighed, watching as she pulled off her panties.

"Hmm…not tonight", she shrugged, opening her drawer and pulling on a new pair of panties, followed by pants and a tee shirt.

"I can't believe you", he laughed in shock.

"Tell you what…the night your mom leaves…we can have sex all night long", she whispered into his ear.

"Fine", he sighed dramatically, putting on some pajamas.

"Besides, I'm dying to look through this", she said, scooting toward the pillows with the photo album in her lap.

Derek got under the covers with her and pulled her close to him. "Do you have any baby pictures of yourself?"

"I might…"

"You do", he laughed. "Where are they?"

"We're looking at yours right now."

"They're in this room, aren't they?", Derek asked, snatching the book away from her.

Meredith laughed. "Give me that."

"In your closet, maybe?"

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours…"

"Porny."

"I didn't mean it like that", she giggled.

"Are you sure?", he asked, kissing her softly.

"In three days, yes. I'm all yours. But right now, we're looking at pictures", she told him, grabbing the book back and snuggling closer to him.

Meredith opened to the first page and looked at a picture of him when he was no more than an hour old. "Oh Derek. Look at you", she smiled. "You had so much hair. And the blue eyes…look how big you are."

"Told you", he laughed.

They flipped through a few pages when Meredith began giggling. "Oh this one is being put in a frame."

"You're so mean."

"You in the bathtub with your curly wet hair and chubby cheeks. Oh, and the adorable little ass. That's frame-worthy."

He just laughed and kissed the top of her head. "If you're framing that one, I'm framing a blackmail picture of you too."

"This isn't blackmail. This is the cutest picture I've ever seen", she corrected.

"Which I happen to be naked in", he added.

"I love you naked."

"Hey, you had your chance tonight", he teased.

"Oh crap—is that Mark?", she squealed happily. "Oh my God it is…"

Derek leaned over to look in the album, spotting a picture of him and Mark in a little inflatable pool in Derek's backyard. "I forgot all about this", he laughed.

"How old are you two in that?"

"Probably three or four." Derek picked up the book to get a closer look. "Oh this is good. Matching swim trunks."

"_Spiderman_ swim trunks", Meredith chimed in. "I'm framing this one too. I might get it blown up and put it on the wall."

"I don't think Izzie wants you messing with the décor of the house", he joked.

"In our house", she smiled. "I want to have lots of pictures in our house. My mom never hung up pictures and I…I want that for us."

"We will. We can have pictures everywhere." He kissed her cheek.

"And I want lots of pictures in the room where the kids are going to play", she told him. "Pictures of all of us together."

Derek looked at her in awe. "What?", she asked, flipping to the next page of the album.

"I just…hearing you say things like that…about kids and playrooms…"

"Does it make you want to sex me up and make a baby right now?", she giggled.

"Something like that", he laughed. "You are an extraordinary person, Meredith", he said, kissing her softly.

"Because I want pictures in the playroom?"

"No…well, yes. But…I just…every day I fall more and more in love with you. And when you say things like that, it makes me realize how lucky I am to be spending the rest of my life with you."

"I love you." Meredith smiled at him and kissed his cheek.

"I love you, too", he said, running his fingers through her honey blonde hair that lay softly on her shoulders.

"The kids are going to be cute. I mean, if they look anything like you in these baby pictures", she giggled, admiring the photos of Derek's childhood. He was such a cute and happy little boy. Meredith could only hope their own children would look just like him.

"They're going to be beautiful, and look just like you", he said, pulling her closer to him.

"Maybe they'll look like both of us."

"I can live with that", he nodded.

"Good. Now let's look at pictures. Because you're making me feel really nesty and in baby-mode."

"I am?", he asked, startled by her statement.

"Yes. But we—not yet. Eventually, but not right now. I want us to be married and settled into the house…maybe enjoy married life for a while…"

"Me too", he said with a smile.

"Good", she said, kissing him again. "Ooh look at this one…full frontal", she giggled.

"Oh God", he groaned. "Remind me to yell at my mom for giving us this."

"Oh relax. You were like two years old. Besides, I've seen it all before", she sighed. "Everybody has a naked baby picture like this."

"You have one then?", he laughed.

"I might", she said nonchalantly, continuing to page through the album. "I was a bit of a nudist baby. Apparently I ran around the house naked all the time."

"Okay, where is your baby book? I have to see it."

"Closet. Top shelf to the right", she pointed.

"Seriously? I can get it?"

"Why not?", she shrugged. But I'm not done with yours yet."

Derek walked over and got the pink book from the closet. "Meredith's First Years", he said, reading the front cover. "Who made this?"

"My dad I guess. My mom wouldn't have made it."

"Very fancy…" He made his way over and rejoined her in the bed.

"Are those your sisters, Der?"

"Yeah", Derek said with a warm smile. "That's Nancy, and Liz, and Kathleen is next to me, and that's Amy", he said as he pointed out each sister.

"You all look alike", Meredith said as she studied the picture.

"Everybody used to say that. All of us have dark hair. Blue eyes too, except Nancy. Hers are brown", he told her.

"What number kid are you?"

"Third. Right in the middle."

"Must have been fun…", she joked.

"Oh yeah", he said sarcastically. "I had Mark though, so it wasn't that bad", he said before pausing. "Oh Meredith…"

"What?"

"You are the most beautiful baby I've ever seen", he grinned, looking at a picture of her minutes after she was born.

"I was scrawny and bald."

"And adorable", he added. "Is that Richard?"

Meredith looked over. "Oh wow…yeah."

"He was there the day you were born?"

Yeah. I was born at Seattle Grace."

"You were? How did I not know that?"

"I thought you knew", Meredith shrugged.

"Nope", he said softly. "So you were in the OR while in the womb, huh? No wonder you're a brilliant surgeon."

"I think it's just in my blood", she shrugged.

"Must be", he agreed. "I never realized how much you and your mom look alike. She looks just like you in these pictures. It almost looks like you holding a baby."

"One day…", she smiled, kissing him softly.

"I hope she has your eyes…and your laugh", he said with a smile, carefully studying each of her baby pictures.

"She?", Meredith asked quietly.

"Or he. I just picture us with girls", he shrugged.

"You do?"

"Yeah. Why? Do you?"

"I don't know. I never really thought about it", she confessed. "Don't you want a son…that way you're not completely outnumbered", she laughed softly, looking into his eyes. All of this kid talk scared her and made her nervous, but she couldn't help but feel happy. Before she met Derek, she wasn't even sure she ever wanted kids, but now, she couldn't stop thinking about it. Maybe she was just hormonal, but lately, she had been nesting and wanting a baby. Sometimes, it was all she thought about.

"It doesn't matter to me. As long as they're happy and healthy. I just see us with lots of pink…you know, Barbies and dress-up clothes", he laughed.

"Really?", she asked, a small smile tugging on her lips.

"Yeah. Or I could be totally wrong. We could have little boys running around the house…"

"Boys that look like you", she said softly. "With the blue eyes and curly, dark hair…"

"We could", he smiled. "Or we could have one of each. Maybe we'll even have quads or something…"

"Pssh. Unless you have magic sperm or something, there's not going to be four babies in my uterus", she told him firmly, unable to hide the smile on her face.

"Technically, it wouldn't be my sperm. It'd be your eggs", he argued.

"Well, you're super-sperm would be the ones fertilizing them", she shot back.

"My super-sperm, huh?", he laughed.

"Yes", she nodded. "Because I know that the day we decide we want to have a baby, you'll have me knocked up in ten seconds."

"Well that's romantic", he joked, kissing her quickly. "No matter what, they're going to be happy and loved, because we're going to be great parents…"

"Yeah", she whispered, her happy, joking demeanor suddenly changing into seriousness.

"Mer, what's wrong? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out. We're not going to have kids until we're ready for them. I just—"

"Oh no, it's not that…it's just…", she paused, letting out a breath. "I never did the things that kids should do. And I don't want our kids to miss out on it—any of it."

"Wait…what do you—", he asked.

"Derek, I…I never went trick or treating. I never…sat on Santa's lap at the mall and told him what I wanted for Christmas. I mean, I had presents on Christmas and my birthday, but I was usually with the nanny. My mom was never there. Birthdays were crap. There was no Easter bunny, no Tooth Fairy, no birthday parties—well, not after I was five years old. There was just…no magic. And I—our kids have to have the magic…", she said softly, wiping off the tears as they fell down her face.

"Meredith", he said, putting her baby book aside to pull her into his arms.

"Sorry, I think I'm just PMS-ing. It's stupid and…I'm okay", she shrugged.

"Meredith, it's not stupid. And it's not okay. Your childhood—no kid should ever have to go through that. Kids should get holidays and birthday parties. And I know that you can't change what happened, but I promise you that our kids will feel it—the magic. It's not too late for you to get it too. Seeing them happy will make up for it", he smiled, kissing her forehead. "We're going to celebrate everything—every holiday, every birthday, first words, when they crawl and walk, every time they use the potty…"

"That's gross, Derek", she giggled.

"I don't care, we're doing it anyway", he laughed. "Every good report card—and let's face it, every report card is going to be excellent. Every graduation—preschool through med school. We'll even celebrate for no good reason at all."

Meredith smiled slightly. "Okay."

"And I'm sorry, Meredith. Stuff like that—I took it all for granted, but…you deserved better than what you got. I never would have guessed that this happy little baby girl in these pictures ever had that kind of childhood", he said sadly, picking up the pink photo album once again and flipping through the pages.

"That's before I really knew what was going on. Had I known what a crap-fest my childhood would turn out to be, I wouldn't be smiling in those pictures…or naked", she said rolling her eyes. "Damn, I'm naked a lot in this…." She took the book from Derek and starting turning the pages. "I'm a stripper."

"You are not", he laughed, attempting to lighten the mood. It broke his heart to think that Meredith grew up without all of the things that come along with childhood. And he knew there was nothing he could do to change that. But knowing that she wanted better for her own children than she herself had was proof enough that she would be an amazing mother.

"Yes. I am", she argued.

"Mer, you look beautiful in these pictures, naked or not", he laughed. "Oh look at this one…kindergarten graduation."

"I remember that the dress was so itchy, but I loved the little sandals", she laughed.

"You look very stylish…the little diploma and cap on your head", he smiled, kissing her cheek. "Your dad looks a lot like George."

"You think so?"

"Yeah…in all of these pictures", he nodded. "You were with your dad a lot, huh?"

Meredith smiled. "All the time. I was so attached to him. I mean, I played with the little kids around here growing up, but he was the one I was with the most."

"Are these the kids you played with?", he asked, pointing out one of the pictures.

"Mhm", she nodded, looking over briefly before continuing to look at Derek's album.

"They're mostly all boys", he laughed.

Meredith shrugged. "I got along better with the boys. They all loved me. In fact, this one right here…", she pointed. "Sammy, he was my first boyfriend."

"You're three years old in this picture", he said in shock.

"He was a good kisser", she said, smiling sweetly.

"Seriously? You had you first kiss at three years old?"

"Aww, jealous?"

"No, just a little…shocked", she laughed. "So, what was it like?"

"We were playing house in his backyard. I was the mommy and he was the daddy. And…I don't know. We just leaned in and kissed each other", she said with a shrug.

"Was there tongue involved?", he joked.

"Pervert", she laughed, smacking him softly. "And you call me Porny…"

"That's my nickname for you", he said with a smirk.

"Ass."

"Is that your nickname for me?"

"I think it works", she nodded. "And no. There was no tongue. Tongue didn't come until much later. But yours is my favorite."

"I do have a magical tongue", he agreed.

"Okay, now your nickname is Cocky Ass", she giggled.

"Yep. Porny is the perfect nickname for you", he laughed, pressing his lips against hers. She laughed against his lips, giving him the chance to slip his tongue into her mouth. Her giggle soon turned into a moan and she closed her eyes, letting herself succumb to the pleasure of him kissing her so passionately.

"Wow", she said breathlessly as they pulled back for air. "That was…"

"Yeah", he breathed, wiping the hair put of her face.

"I love you, Derek", she said softly.

"I love you too", he smiled.

"And I love your pictures", she giggled.

"We'll hang up all the ones you want in the house. And we're hanging some of yours up too."

"Fine. Just not the naked ones. Visitors might get the wrong impression."

"Probably", he chuckled. "Oh look at this one…you're covered in chocolate. This is one for the playroom."

"At least I'm not naked", she joked.

"Now there's an idea—you naked covered in chocolate…", he said with a sly grin.

"Yeah, I'm the porny one", she sighed, rolling her eyes.

Derek just laughed and kissed the top of her head. Together, they continued to look through the photo albums. Each picture made Meredith realize how much she wanted a baby with Derek. Maybe they would have boys that looked just like him with the blue eyes and happy smile. Or maybe he was right, and they would have daughters with her blonde hair and green eyes. Maybe they would get one of each. No matter what, she knew that he was the only person in the world she'd want to be the father of her children.

And Derek, he already knew that Meredith would be a wonderful mother, despite the doubts she had in herself. The only way Meredith and Ellis were alike was in their surgical brilliance. Meredith wasn't coldhearted or emotionless. She was warm, loving, and kind. She put people before herself. She cared about her friends dearly, even her own patients. And when the time came for motherhood, the apple would fall far from the tree.

**Please review. They give me lots of motivation to write. And again, let me know if this fic is getting old…**

**Thanks to all my great reviewers and readers. I really appreciate it.**


	16. Need to Talk

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! You guys are awesome! **

"I thought you were taking off today and tomorrow?", Izzie yawned, her body sprawled out on the bench in the resident lounge, tired from her night on call.

Meredith pulled her hair back into a ponytail. "Derek and Mark are going to the little restaurant a few blocks away with his mom. And I wasn't going to spend the day lounging around the house."

"How long are you here until?", Alex asked.

"I don't know. It depends if I get a surgery…or if I want one of yours", she added with a grin, waving the sparkle pager around before clipping it onto her scrub pants.

"You know, you could just give it to me for the day. Go home, relax, spend time Mommy McDreamy", Cristina suggested.

"If she's giving it to anyone, it's me. I made all of the baked goods for his mother", Izzie argued.

"I'm the one who gave up my room for three days and has to share a bed with Iz. She's giving me the pager", Alex told them.

"Hey, I'm being nice. If you don't like it, sleep on the couch", Izzie said.

"Hold on", Meredith interrupted. "I'm not giving anyone the pager. So you can stop fighting."

"You suck", Cristina said, taking a bite out of her granola bar.

"Oh, before I forget…do both of you have off Sunday?", Izzie asked Meredith and Cristina.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because I think I can get us in the bridal shop", Izzie said happily.

"On second thought, I might just have work on Sunday", Cristina said quickly.

"You do not", Meredith said, rolling her eyes. "Come on, it might be fun…"

"What the hell happened to you?", Alex asked jokingly.

"Shut up", Meredith laughed. "Sunday sounds good, Iz."

"Yay! Okay, so I want you to start thinking about colors and styles", Izzie told Meredith. "It's good to go in there with an idea of what you want."

"You really have a lot of freakish wedding knowledge", Cristina commented.

"I appreciate it, Iz. Without you, I'd be totally lost", Meredith said with a smile, coming to Izzie's defense.

"Hey guys", George said, entering the resident lounge.

"Hey George", Meredith greeted.

"Did you guys hear anything about the new OB/GYN?"

"There's a new gyno-beast?", Cristina asked.

"Wonder which one of us is on the uterus parade", Alex said, clipping his name tag to his pocket.

"Mer, if I get stuck there, feel free to sparkle page me out of it. Really, it's all yours", Cristina offered.

"Oh, so now you _want_ me to take your surgeries?"

"If they involve being on the vagina squad, then yes."

"How many names are you gonna come up with for OB/GYN?", Bailey asked, walking into the lounge holding a stack of charts.

"We heard there's a new Addis—Dr. Montgomery", Meredith said, correcting herself. "Any details?"

"I'm not here to gossip", she told them. "I'm here to tell you that your interns are waiting in the hall, because you're all too busy chit-chatting."

"You're not going to tell us anything?", Izzie asked with a smile, attempting to coax a few details out of their former resident.

"She started yesterday, and Sloan already made his move", Bailey told them. "That's all I know."

"Ooh, Mer, get the details from Derek", Izzie called, making her way down the hall.

"I will", Meredith called back.

Bailey shook her head and chuckled. She knew that she had taught them well, and that they were the best surgeons in the bunch, but she couldn't help but laugh at their incessant need to gossip. "Look, I know that technically I'm not in charge of you anymore, but if I find any of you lounging in the hallways discussing hospital gossip, I'm putting you in the pit", she warned them.

"Can you do that?", Alex asked.

"Karev, don't tempt me. Now go", she said, shooing them away. They instantly dispersed and went on with their work days. Bailey laughed softly to herself, knowing that she still had power over them, even if they thought otherwise.

--

"So guess what mom gave Meredith last night?", Derek asked Mark. The three were eating breakfast at the small café near Seattle Grace. Linda loved spending time with her boys. Derek and Mark had been best friends since they were toddlers, and she was grateful that their friendship had remained strong even through everything that had happened.

"Do I even want to know?", Mark asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Baby pictures…embarrassing blackmail at its best."

"Damn. That's harsh", Mark winced, shaking his head.

"Did she like them, dear?", Linda asked.

"Oh yeah", Derek laughed. "She wants to frame all of them, even the one of us in the pool."

"With the matching shorts?", Mark asked amusedly.

"Yep."

"Oh that's a lovely picture", Linda said with a smile. "You two were the sweetest little things, always so charming."

"We're still charming", Derek teased.

"Did you know they have nicknames for us over at the hospital?", Mark asked.

"Oh God, Mark, don't", Derek groaned.

"McDreamy and McSteamy", Mark said with a nod, ignoring Derek.

"Oh that's adorable", Linda laughed. "Who made those up?"

"Your future daughter-in-law made up McSteamy", Mark grinned. "I've been called worse…"

"Oh you love it", Derek laughed. "Don't even pretend you hate it."

"And where did Mc…?"

"Dreamy", Mark finished. "Dr. McDreamy."

"I hate you", Derek kidded. "I'm actually not sure where that one came from. Probably Meredith or one of her friends."

"Oh I almost forgot to tell you—Richard hired a new OB/GYN. She's hot…", Mark grinned.

"You don't waste any time, do you? When did she get here?", Derek asked.

"Yesterday."

"I'm surprised Richard filled the position. He's still hoping Addison comes back", Derek laughed.

"Addison is very happy in Los Angeles. I don't think she'll be living here again", Linda assured them. "So is she nice, honey?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah, she's sweet. I actually ate lunch with her yesterday…showed her around the hospital."

"Aah", Derek nodded. "Grand tour…"

"You bet."

"Show her the on-call rooms?"

"I don't like that, Derek", Linda scolded.

"Sorry, mom", Derek said in an apologetic tone. He was actually amused by the fact that though he was approaching forty, his mother still had the power to make him apologize for his seemingly sexual remark.

"You should know that I'm turning over a new leaf. Ever since you've gotten engaged, I feel like it's time for me to settle down—or, at the very least, attempt to settle down."

"Settling down requires a woman to settle down with", Derek reminded him.

"I'm working on it…"

"Good for you, sweetheart", Linda said with a smile, praising Mark for his efforts.

"Thank you", Mark replied. "At least one of you is nice to me…"

"I'm nice to you", Derek laughed. "You're the best man at my wedding. One day, you'll be the godfather of my kids. I'd say that's nice."

"I'm going to be the godfather?", he asked, pleasantly surprised. It wasn't that he thought Derek would choose someone else, he just hadn't thought about it before.

"Who else would do it? And I'm sure Cristina will be the godmother."

"Great", Mark grinned sarcastically.

"Cristina is Meredith's best friend, right?", Linda asked.

"Yeah", Derek said with a nod. "They're really close. She's always kicking me out of bed to have girl talk with Meredith."

"Is she single?"

Derek looked at her questioningly. "Yes…"

"Maybe Mark could date her", Linda suggested.

"Yeah, right. Yang hates me", Mark laughed. "She called me Ken all day yesterday."

"Ken?", Derek asked curiously.

"I was working with Stevens. All day long, we were Ken and Barbie", Mark said, shaking his head.

"Oh, that's Izzie right? Maybe you could date her. She seems like a lovely girl", Linda said with a smile. Apparently, she was now a matchmaker. If one of her sons was getting married, she had to make sure that her pseudo-son also found a woman to settle down with.

"I thought her and Karev were an item", Mark said.

"You're just as gossipy as Meredith", Derek commented with a laugh.

"I am not", he argued. "I just heard them talking about sleeping in the same bed, so I assumed they were dating…"

"They're sleeping in the same room while mom is here", Derek told him.

"Sounds like you're both very gossipy", Linda joked.

"We are not", they said in unison.

"Whatever you say, dears", she laughed. "So when are we meeting Richard today?"

"As soon as we're done here. I told him yesterday that you'd be stopping by around noon", Mark told her.

"That sounds great", she said with a smile. Linda was loving this time with her boys. She loved her girls dearly, but Derek and Mark lived so far away, and their busy careers made it difficult to call regularly. It was so nice spending time with them, knowing that they were happy. Derek had found the love of his life, and Mark, well, he would come around. She was sure there was a woman out there for Mark that would love him just as much as Meredith loved Derek.

--

"Hello, Linda. How you doing?", Richard asked as she and Derek stepped into the Chief's office.

"I'm great. And how are you doing? Oh, how's Adele?", Linda asked kindly, taking a seat in one of the chairs in front of the large wooden desk adorned with stacks of papers.

"Oh, she's…well, actually, we're separated. But it's amicable. We're dating now…dating each other, trying to make it work again…", he rambled with a nervous smile. Derek looked on from the chair next to his mother, and smiled to himself. Richard and Meredith may not have been related, but Derek couldn't help but notice a similarity in their nervous habits.

"That's great, Richard. It's always good to have second chances", Linda said with a smile.

"Yes it is", Richard replied happily. "So, how's the family?"

"They're doing well. Oh dear, Derek, I can't believe I almost forgot to tell you…Amy is pregnant", Linda exclaimed happily.

"What?", Derek asked in shock, unable to hide the happiness spread across his face. "How could you forget to tell me something like that?"

"I've just been so busy these past two days, it completely slipped my mind", Linda explained.

"That's great. Give her my congratulations", Richard grinned.

"I'm going to go call her." Derek stood up from his chair. "And I'm blaming you when she asks why I didn't call sooner…", he joked.

As he left the room and walked down the hall, he saw Meredith approaching. "Hey you", he smiled, kissing her softly.

"Hey. Mark told me you guys were talking to the Chief. I was just on my way in to say hello. Where are you going?"

"Oh, um…my sister is pregnant, and my mom forgot to tell me about it until just now", Derek explained with a laugh.

Meredith smiled. "Oh my God! Derek! That's great! Which one?"

"Amy."

"She's the youngest one, right?"

"Yep. Amy's the baby of the family", he said with a warm smile.

Meredith wrapped her arms around him. Standing on her tiptoes, she kissed him on the cheek. "That makes fifteen nieces and nephews now."

"Yes it does", Derek agreed, kissing her again.

"Okay. Go call her. I'll be in the Chief's office…", Meredith said with a warm smile, starting to make her way down the hall.

"Okay. I love you."

"I love you too", she said sweetly, her ponytail swaying back and forth as she gracefully bounced down the hall toward Richard's office.

"Hey man, where you going?", Mark called to Derek.

"Calling Amy. She's pregnant, and mom just decided to tell me now", he laughed.

"The baby is pregnant?", Mark asked excitedly.

"Yep", Derek nodded.

"I want to talk to her when you're done", Mark told him as the two made their way into Derek's office. "Wait…why are you calling from your desk phone?"

"Seattle Grace gets the long distance phone bill. Not me."

"Now what would mom say to that?", Mark chided.

"Oh don't even start, Mr. New Leaf", Derek joked.

"Shut up", Mark shot back amusedly. "I'm serious about that."

"Mhm", he mumbled, dialing the number and waiting for an answer.

"Fine. When I fall in love with the new OB, you owe me an apology."

"Will do."

--

Meredith sat quietly as Linda and Richard discussed old times back in New York when Derek was one of the Chief's students. They talked about family, and made pleasant conversation, and Meredith just sat. She really didn't know what to say. Richard was like a sort-of step-father to her, and Linda was her future mother-in-law, but she couldn't think of anything to say.

It would be easier if Derek was here, but he was off calling his sister. It amazed her that people actually had happy families. Families that called to congratulate each other on their pregnancies, and celebrated birthdays, and, well, whatever else families did together. It even surprised her that along with marrying Derek, she gained an entire family…sisters-in-law, brothers-in-law, and now fifteen nieces and nephews. For once in her life, she'd be part of a family, and one day, she and Derek would have their own. They would be husband and wife, mommy and daddy.

"So Derek tells me that you had planned to retire", Linda said.

Richard nodded. "I was going to, but my work here—it wasn't finished. I've learned to prioritize…delegate. And because of it, I get to spend more time with my wife. Adele was the reason I was going to retire in the first place. I thought I'd have to choose between my wife and my career…but somehow, I found a way to have both", he said with a smile.

"I'm glad, Richard", Linda smiled. "When Derek told me that he had been offered the chief position, I thought you'd retired, but then he told me he turned it down. He thought the stress of work and having a personal life would be too much."

Meredith's mind had been wandering, but now she was listening intently. Derek had never told her that he had been offered Richard's job. In fact, Derek never brought it up at all. Meredith had always assumed that Richard hadn't picked any of them. But now, now she was learning that Derek had been given the opportunity to have the job he had been dreaming of his whole career, and he declined. And that made her angry. She knew she was being irrational, and should let him explain things before she jumped to conclusions. But she couldn't help but think that she influenced his decision.

"I, uh…I'll be back", Meredith said quickly, standing up from her chair and making her way out of the room. She knew that she shouldn't be angry. She knew that it was almost her time of the month, and she always got a little short tempered and moody, but no matter how much she tried to calm down, it wasn't working.

Luckily, she was on-call to the pit that day, and there were hardly any traumas rolling in. She just need some time to cool down, sort some things out. Meredith made her way down to the tunnels, got some chips and a soda from the vending machine, and hopped onto one of the gurneys, lying down on the hard, black mat to think. Derek could be chief of surgery right now. Meredith knew he wanted this, and had been working for it his whole career. And when he finally had his chance, he gave it up.

She was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard her cell phone vibrate in her pocket. She texted Cristina back, telling her that she was in the tunnels.

"Okay, why are you down here?", Cristina asked, plopping down on the adjacent gurney. "It's lunch time. You never miss lunch time."

"I have chips."

"Chips aren't lunch."

"I just…need time to think."

"You mean sulk?"

"I'm not sulking."

"You're laying on a gurney by yourself in the hospital basement. That's called sulking."

Meredith sighed. "Okay, fine. I'm sulking."

"But why?"

"Because. Derek turned down the chief position."

"The Chief is still working here."

"Yes, because Derek turned it down."

"Okay", Cristina nodded slowly, trying to piece together why exactly Meredith was pissed off. "And…?"

"He did it because he didn't want to choose between his personal life and his career."

"So he did it for you", Cristina replied.

"Yes…maybe…I don't know."

"Well, did you talk to him?"

"No."

"Are you gonna?"

"I'm engaged to him. We sleep in the same bed. Obviously I'm going to have to talk to him eventually. Stupid brain man…"

"So why don't you just go find him now?"

"Because. His sister is pregnant and he's happy…his mom is here, and she's happy, and I can't say anything with her around."

"So, what, you're going wait until she leaves? That's stupid."

"What?"

"Look, Meredith, I'm not usually the one dishing out relationship advice. I really don't have the best track record, seeing as I was left in the back of a church on my non-wedding day", Cristina explained. "But if I've learned anything from that, it's this…you have to get all of the crap out in the open. Because before you know it, even more crap is going to pile up, and it's going to be too late to say anything, and you'll find yourself eyebrow-less in the back of a church while the man you love walks away because you never told him how you felt."

Meredith was speechless. Cristina never spoke about Burke, or the non-wedding. Meredith had made a few unsuccessful attempts to get her to talk, to show some emotion over what had happened. But the fact that she had openly brought it up was big. "I know. I have to talk to him. But I'm just pissed right now."

"Oh, you have a right to be pissed", Cristina told her frankly. "But don't stay pissed or grudgy. Yell at him…kick his ass, whatever, and let it go."

Meredith smiled slightly. "Thanks, Dr. Phil."

"Just trying to be helpful. You're my person", Cristina shrugged, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. She knew she wasn't always there for Meredith when it came to problems with her and Derek. She let them fight their own battles. But if Meredith wanted to bitch about him, she was all ears. That's just what they did. They could bitch and complain to each other with the comfort of knowing they were each other's confidants.

Cristina patted Meredith's knee. "Okay. That concludes our therapy session for the day. I'm hungry."

"See you later", Meredith called out to her friend as she made her way toward the stairwell. Eventually, Meredith's pager went off. 911. She quickly made her way back upstairs to find the ER full of car crash victims. There was lots of blood. Lots of bloody, broken car crash victims that needed to be cut open. Looks like talking to Derek would have to wait until tonight.

**So, this chapter had a few things going on. There's a new OB/GYN. Mark is evolving. I love him as a manwhore, but I think it'd be good to see him have a substantial relationship. Cristina is talking about Burke, something she hasn't done before now. Alex and Izzie are sharing a bed—make of that what you will. Hee hee. And Meredith knows that Derek turned down being chief. This was never addressed on the show, and I think it's sort of important.**

**Please review! Reviews are like oxygen to a writer. Is there anything you'd like to see in this fic? I'm open to suggestions! :)**


	17. You're My Future

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine. This is for enjoyment purposes only.**

**Thanks to my great reviewers. I really appreciate it.**

She was exhausted, completely exhausted. Ever since she was paged back to the pit after the trauma, she had been in the OR all day, doing surgery after surgery. But now she was home, and she still had to rant to Derek. She figured ranting sounded like a better word to use then yelling. No matter what she called it, she knew that she had to talk to him tonight. Going to bed angry wasn't an option, and if that meant waking him up, she'd do it.

"Hello, sweetheart", Linda greeted with a smile as Meredith walked into the house. "Oh my, you looked tired…"

"Yeah. Sorry, I know we were supposed to…that I wasn't supposed to work all day, but then there was a pile-up on the highway, and I couldn't leave…", she said, chewing on her lip.

"No need to apologize. I understand", she said assuringly. "Izzie and I were actually baking. We got to talking about banana bread, and I gave her my recipe, and then we just decided to test it out. There's some in the kitchen if you're hungry…"

"Oh, yeah, thanks", Meredith smiled.

"Okay, well, I was just making myself a cup of tea, and now I'm back off to bed. See you in the morning, sweetie." Linda pulled Meredith in for a hug and kissed her cheek.

"Night", Meredith replied with a soft smile. "Oh, um…where's Derek?"

"He's in the shower. He's already been in there a while, you know how he is about his hair. I'm sure he'll be done soon", Linda said with a laugh, turning and heading for the stairs.

"Yeah. Okay, thanks", she giggled softly. "Oh…congratulations! I heard Amy is pregnant."

"Yeah, she's already ten weeks along, it's her first. I completely forgot to tell Derek when I got here", Linda laughed.

Meredith laughed along with her. "Derek was so excited when he told me."

"He and Amy were always close. She's my baby, and Derek was so protective of her", Linda said with a smile. "That's fifteen grandchildren. I'm so proud of all of them."

"Derek told me all of their names once, but I was so overwhelmed, I forgot most of them."

Linda patted Meredith's shoulder. "I'm sure you'll learn. They're going to love you."

Meredith just smiled and nodded. "I hope so…"

"They will. I know it", Linda said with an assuring smile. "Night, dear."

"Night", Meredith said back. "And tomorrow, we'll spend the day together. Derek wants to show you the land."

"Oh I'm looking forward to that."

"Me too", Meredith smiled. "Night." After Linda made her way upstairs, Meredith went into the kitchen.

"Whoa", she muttered to herself, noticing all of the banana bread on the table. She cut herself a huge slice and shoved it into her mouth, not even bothering to use utensils. The last thing she'd eaten was the bag of chips this afternoon, so needless to say, she was starving. When she heard the shower shut off a few minutes later, she headed upstairs.

"Hey. Did you just get in?", Derek asked, pulling on his boxers followed by some pajamas.

"Mhm", she mumbled, making her way into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm brushing my teeth…"

"You seem upset. Are you okay?"

"I smell like surgery but I'm too damn tired to take a shower tonight", she answered with a mouthful of toothpaste. "And my back is killing me."

"Want me to rub it for you?"

Meredith spit into the sink. "What I want is for you to tell me why you turned down the opportunity to be chief."

"Wait? What?"

"Why didn't you tell me that the chief offered you the job?", she asked, the anger evident in her voice, but still low enough that Linda couldn't hear them from down the hall. "I had to find out from your mother."

"Meredith, I—"

"Was it because you thought you had to take care of me? That you thought I couldn't even take care of myself?" She was snapping at him. She knew she shouldn't be getting angry, but for some reason, she was in the mood to pick a fight. She was tired, bitchy, and getting crampy. And unfortunately, Derek was the one she took her anger out on when she was upset.

"Meredith, he offered me the job the day after the wedding. We weren't together, or at least that's what I thought", he explained softly, not wanting to upset her more.

"You came to Seattle to be chief", Meredith countered, trying to keep her voice down.

"You're right. I did", he said with a nod.

"So…what? You gave that up?" She quickly ripped off her jeans and sweater, and rummaged through Derek's drawer for some sweatpants. After she found a pair, she changed into a new pair of panties and hopped on each foot until her bottom half was covered in the sweats. Derek pursed his lips to keep from laughing. He always knew Meredith was much less graceful and a lot clumsier after a long day, and watching her rant and rave while hobbling around half naked made it almost impossible not to kiss her.

"I didn't want it."

"What do you mean you didn't want it? I remember you keeping me up at night while you bitched about him giving it to Burke instead of you."

"That's when I thought I wanted it."

"Was it because I drowned?"

Derek was taken off guard. He and Meredith had talked about her drowning, but she rarely brought it up. They had come to terms with it, and both of them felt at peace with the subject. "What?"

"Is that why you turned it down?"

"No", he answered honestly.

She unclasped her bra and roughly pulled a tee shirt over her head. "Derek, after my near-death…whatever, you hovered. You hovered big time. And I know that you only did it because you care about me, but Derek…you can't just—you had a chance to be chief. And I know that I'm probably the reason you didn't take the job."

"You're right. You are."

"Oh, well, I'm glad", she said sarcastically.

"Meredith", he sighed. "I didn't want it. You're right…when I first moved out here, that was my goal, to become chief."

"And when did that change?"

"When I realized that you were the most important thing in my life. So being chief…who cared? What I cared about was you…having a future with you."

"So I'm the reason you gave up on your dream. Do you know how awful that makes me feel?" She could feel the tears starting to prick in her eyes.

"Meredith, my dream is not to become chief. It's not, and I don't ever want you to feel like you're responsible for me not taking the job."

"Did you feel like you had to choose? Choose between me and your career? Because Derek, you know that I would have supported you."

"_If_ we hadn't broken up…"

Meredith sighed. "Yes, _if_ we hadn't broken up…"

"But we did—we broke up. At least, I thought we did. I didn't talk to you or see you for seventeen days. But I assumed that we had broken up. And I still didn't want the job. Richard could have offered me all the money and perks in the world, and I still wouldn't have taken it. If he offered it to me ten years from now, I still wouldn't take it."

"You wouldn't?", she asked quietly.

Derek shook his head. "No. I wouldn't. And do you know why? Because I want our family to come first. I want to come home at night and sleep next to you. I want to be there for the first words, and first time crawling and walking, potty training. I want to do all of it. And if I would have taken that job, you know I wouldn't have been able to do those things."

"I just don't want you to regret not taking it", she admitted sadly.

"Meredith, come here", he said softly, outstretching his arms so he could wrap them around her.

She huffed before walking over to him, letting him put his hands on the small of her back. "What?"

"I don't want to have any regrets. And if I took that job, I'd regret it. And I don't want you think of it as me picking you over my career, because that's not true. I realized that you were my purpose in life. And being chief wouldn't have meant anything if I didn't have you. Because even though we broke up, I knew this thing with us would never be over. I knew that one day we'd get it right…one day, we'd get our lifetime", he said with a soft smile.

"I just wish you would have told me…"

Derek nodded. "I know. You're right, I should have told you. And looking back on it, I realize that the right thing to do would to have been straight with you."

"Then why weren't you?"

"Because I didn't think it was a big deal."

"Derek—", she started before he cut her off.

"When I came out here, I was done with relationships, with women, with anything resembling love. I came here for a fresh start. I came here thinking that one day, I would be chief. But then, I walked into a bar one night in July for a drink, and walked out of it with the love of my life", he said with a small smile before pausing. "And I know that you would have supported me, I do. But Meredith, you gave me a second chance—a second chance to do what I had given up on when I came out here. And I wasn't going to risk that. You mean too much to me. Our future means too much to me. That's why I didn't take the job."

"Okay", she whispered, nodding her head slightly.

"Okay?"

"Yeah." She bit her bottom lip. "Okay."

"Are you mad at me?"

Meredith shook her head. "No."

"You're not?"

"I just wanted to know why. And you gave me your reasons", she said softly.

"I'm sorry, Mer."

"No, it's…I shouldn't have snapped. I'm tired and crampy right now", she yawned. "And you're the one I bitch at when I'm moody. Get used to that, by the way."

Derek chuckled softly. "I don't mind."

Meredith wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her head against his chest. "I love you", she murmured.

"I love you too", he said, kissing the top of her head. "Come on, let's get into bed so you don't fall asleep standing up."

"Kay", she yawned. The two made their way over to the bed and Derek pulled her close to him. "I promise I'll come to bed all hot tomorrow night for the sex…", she said tiredly, cuddling into his body more closely.

"If you're feeling crappy, we're not having sex."

"If I wasn't so exhausted, we'd be doing it now…"

"Even with my mom here?"

"I'm horny", she mumbled.

"You can barely keep your eyes open", he said, laughing softly.

"I'm always horny when I'm PMS-ing. Besides, if we don't have sex tomorrow, we're going to have to wait a week or so…"

Derek chuckled. "I can live without sex, you know. I'm not some sex addict."

"But…we like sex…all kinds of sex…"

"That sounded kinky."

"It's true", she yawned.

"And you wonder why I call you Porny", he chuckled.

"Shut up", she giggled tiredly, squirming in his embrace to absorb his body heat.

"Oh I forgot to tell you…"

"Hmm…"

"Amy and Tom—that's her husband—they want us to be the godparents", he said with a smile.

Meredith's eyes shot open and she looked up at him. "What?"

"When I talked to her today, she asked me if you and I would like to be their baby's godparents."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"They don't even know me…"

"You're going to meet them at the wedding. And besides, she always wanted me to be the godfather, and it only makes sense that you would be the godmother", he explained softly, brushing a few strands of hair off of her face.

"I um…okay", she nodded. "Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"Well, I'm not going to say no to them. They asked and…we sort of have to do it", she reasoned.

"Are you sure you're okay with it?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

Derek kissed her forehead. "Thank you, Meredith."

"What exactly do they do?"

"They hold the kid at the baptism."

Meredith looked at him dryly. "Ass…I know that. I mean, what exactly is our role as godparents?"

"Nothing, really. I mean, I guess it's something sort of important, but it's more so just a title", he shrugged.

"Oh. Well, that's easy then."

"We'll probably have to fly out there though…", he said cautiously, waiting for her response.

"Oh. Yeah, that makes sense…"

"She's due in early September. I think they usually baptize around a month old, so we'll probably fly out there in October. Is that…okay?"

"Yeah. I'm going to have to work a lot more shifts to make up for the time I miss, but that's okay. I…this is good, Derek. The family thing…"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah", she said softly.

"We'll be married by then."

"That's weird."

"Good weird I hope?"

Meredith laughed through her yawn. "Yeah, good weird—exciting weird."

"Good. Oh by the way, Mark is the godfather of ours…"

"I sort of figured that", she giggled. "Can we have two godmothers?"

"Izzie and Cristina?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. They're both my maids of honor. I want them to be the godmothers."

"Okay", he said with a smile. "We could do that."

"There's no rule against it or anything?"

"No", he laughed softly. "There's no rule against it."

"Well, I'm sorry I didn't know, Mr. Religious…"

"Mr. Religious?"

"I'm tired. That's the best I could think of."

"There's nothing holy about what I'll be doing to you this time tomorrow night…", he whispered into her ear, nipping on her earlobe.

"Stop it", she whined. "I'm tired and you're…making me all turned on…"

Derek chuckled softly. "Sorry, I'll stop. Do you want me to rub your back instead?"

"Mhm", she mumbled into his chest, pressing her body as close to his as she could, wanting to feel every part of him against her.

Derek began rubbing her sore back, feeling her body relax into his arms. "Your hair smells good…"

"It probably smells like blood and guts", she groaned.

"I assure you it doesn't smell like blood and guts", he laughed, sniffing her flowery scented hair once again. "Your hair always smells good."

"Hmm…we need to take another bath together. We haven't done that in a while…", she sighed, a content smile on her face as Derek gently rubbed her back.

"We should", he agreed. "And when we move into our house, we can take baths together all the time…"

"Big bathtub", she said with a smile.

"Very big bathtub that we can do all sorts of things in. Your bendiness is going to come in handy in that bathtub", he smirked.

"What did I say?"

"Hmm?"

"No sex talk. Or I might have to let you take advantage of me."

"Nah, I'll wait. I'd rather have you awake for it", he said softly.

"You should know by now that I don't have to be fully awake for you to take advantage of me", she giggled.

"You'll want to be awake for what I plan to do to you tomorrow night, believe me."

"Hmm…big things planned, huh?"

"Mhm. So I want you to sleep now so you'll be well rested for the fun."

"Okay", she whispered. "Love you…"

"I love you too, Mer." He kissed her forehead softly. Not even a minute later, Derek heard the snores making their way out of her small body. He gently shifted to his other side to retrieve his trusty earplugs. After fitting them into his ears, he rolled back over to wrap his arms around her once again.

As he watched her sleep, he thought about the events that had occurred tonight. She came into the room angry and ranting. And fell asleep contentedly in his arms. He understood why she was upset, and he should have told her about turning down the position. But in his mind, it wasn't a big deal. Meredith was the most important part of his life. The children he and Meredith would have together, they were what mattered.

He had seen what being chief had done to Richard's marriage. And he was not going to let that happen to him and Meredith. He wanted to be there for everything. Nannies wouldn't raise their children. Meredith and Derek would raise their children. If Derek would have taken the position, he knew he would miss out on so much. Instead of staying up with Meredith for the midnight feedings, he'd be buried under a pile of paperwork, too tired to drive home after a long shift. To Derek, that wasn't acceptable.

He would never let himself be a stranger to his own family the way Ellis was to Meredith. He wanted to show Meredith that this could work. They could be surgeons and still have a happy family. Managing both wouldn't be easy, but somehow, they would find a way to do it.

They were Meredith and Derek. They were the Seattle Grace Legend. Together, the two had overcome every obstacle that had been thrown at them. And they would continue to be successful, both in their careers and in their love for one another. That was the only option they were willing to accept. They wouldn't settle for anything less than their fairytale. It wouldn't be perfect. Sure things wouldn't always be easy. But maybe there was beauty in the imperfection.

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	18. Saying Goodbye

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy does not belong to me. **

**Thanks so much for all the great reviews. You guys are awesome! This chapter was supposed to go up a few hours go, but the site wasn't working for me. But it's here now. Please review!**

"Oh, this is beautiful", Linda said with a smile as she, Meredith and Derek approached the land and the house that was in the process of being built.

"Der", Meredith gasped. She had no idea that the foundation of the house as well as the walls were already up. She expected to see a huge hole in the ground. Though it was still far from finished, it already looked beautiful on the outside.

"What?"

"It's…sort of built."

"Yeah", he chuckled. "Wait—you haven't seen it yet?"

"No." Meredith shook her head. "I've been busy with work. How did they…? They only started building two months ago."

"That's what happens when you hire a contractor who's a former patient…", he smiled. "What do you think, mom?"

"This has to be the most beautiful land in Seattle", Linda said in amazement. "And the view is breathtaking. You can see the ferryboats from here."

Derek laughed. "That's one of the reasons I bought the land in the first place."

"I love it, Derek", Meredith said with a smile, lacing her fingers with his. "Is it safe to go inside?"

"Yeah", he said with a nod. "Come on."

The three made their way into the empty house. The hardwood floor had been installed, as well as the dividers for each of the rooms. Even the staircase and the second floor were finished. "Wow", Meredith whispered, still holding Derek's hand. She was in awe that it had been built so quickly. She was in awe at how big it was on the inside. She was in awe of everything. "Derek."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just…wow", she said again. "It's everything that we wanted."

"Of course it is", he chuckled, squeezing her hand. "Do you want to take a tour?"

Both Meredith and Linda nodded. "That sounds great, dear."

"This…", he pointed, "…is our living room."

"Oh how nice", Linda said happily. "I love the windows. They just open the room up. And the sunshine pouring in makes it look beautiful…"

"All excellent points", Derek agreed with a laugh. "We wanted to make it big enough for when we have company over. The windows really add to it."

"They really do", Linda agreed.

"And the room next to that is our kitchen."

"Izzie would be so jealous of this", Meredith joked, walking around the kitchen. "Wow…it's huge."

"The screen door leads to the backyard. We figured it would be good for barbecues and stuff", Derek explained.

"Can we go outback, Derek?", Meredith asked. "I want to see the backyard."

"Sure." Derek opened the screen door and the three made their way out onto the patio.

"Oh how beautiful", Linda smiled. The view from the backyard was incredible. The great expanse of Seattle went on for miles below. The trees surrounding the house gave it a feeling of seclusion and privacy from the outside world. It was like their own little vacation spot. A little piece of paradise just for them. It may have been an empty house and an unfinished backyard, but for them, it was a glimpse into their future. One day, they would move into this house. One day, their children would come home to this house. One day, they would play as a family out here in the yard.

It was certainly overwhelming, but for once, Meredith wasn't panicking. She was completely content. She gave Derek's hand a gentle squeeze and kissed his cheek.

"You like it?", he asked softly.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I love it", she whispered.

The three made their way back into the house to finish the tour. "Across the hall from the kitchen is the playroom, right over here."

"Oh Derek. This is lovely", Linda whispered, walking around to admire the large room. The sunlight coming in through the glass windows gave the still white walls a yellowish tint, making it look warm and homey.

Meredith felt tears pricking in her eyes. She could almost picture their daughters playing dress-up in here. Or maybe their sons playing with race cars on the floor. The pitter-patter of little feet running around the house. The laughter that would echo and bounce off the walls. Suddenly it all became too much and Meredith felt a tear makes its way down her cheek.

"Mer", Derek whispered, wiping away the tear away with the pad of his thumb.

"I'm fine", she smiled. "It's just…our kids are actually going to play in here one day."

"Yeah", he said softly, returning the smile.

"How weird is that?", she giggled, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I'd say it's the best kind of weird there is." He kissed the top of her head and wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Yeah", she whispered. "It is."

After they made their rounds around the first floor and finished looking through all of the rooms, and peeked down in the still unfinished basement, they made their way upstairs. "Is this safe?", Meredith asked.

"Yeah. Of course. Only the best for this house", he said with a smile. "Come on."

"All of the kids' bedrooms are about the same size. I remember how jealous I was of the girls when I was little. They always got the bigger rooms", he laughed.

"The girls were two and two. That's why they got the bigger rooms", Linda explained with a laugh.

"But I was the only boy. You should have felt sorry for me", he teased.

Meredith rolled her eyes and giggled. "Get over it."

"Thank you, Meredith", Linda laughed. "Okay…let's see these kids' rooms."

"We figured this one could be used for a nursery. It's closer to the master bedroom. Then when they get old enough, they can have their own rooms. And the next baby can use this for a nursery", Derek explained.

"Sounds like you two are going to be busy…", Linda joked.

"Apparently your son thinks I'm a baby factory. Move one out, ship one in." Meredith shook her head and smirked at him.

"I do not", Derek argued amusedly. "I'm just saying…"

"We just want to be prepared", Meredith finished for him.

"That's very smart", Linda agreed.

"And next to the nursery are the kids' bedrooms." Derek led them to each of the rooms. "The bathroom is right across the hall."

Meredith couldn't tear the smile off of her face as she admired the kids' rooms. They were bigger than the average child's room, which was what happened when you built your own house. "I love them", she grinned, walking into one of the rooms. She ran her fingers over the window pane and looked outside. Every window, no matter which room you were in or the angle it was on, had an amazing view of the land. "I still can't believe they built it so fast…"

"They still have to install the plumbing and electric, and everything still has to be painted and furnished, so it's not really livable yet."

"When are you planning to move in?", Linda asked as they made their way next door to the other kids' room.

Derek shrugged. "Probably not until the end of July or August."

"So after the wedding?"

"Yeah", Derek nodded. "After the wedding."

They made their way to the master bedroom after making a brief visit to the guestroom. Meredith and Derek's future bedroom was the biggest of all the rooms on the second floor, complete with their very own bathroom, which of course had a large shower and bathtub for their wet and wild activities. Next to the windows in their bedroom, there was a balcony overlooking the backyard. The beautiful land of Seattle stretched for miles ahead of them. Standing in their bedroom felt a little surreal, but in the best possible way. Meredith couldn't believe that in a few months, she would be living in this house, sleeping in this room every night with Derek, who would be her husband. And a few years down the line, the kids' rooms would be occupied. The house they were in the process of building would be the Shepherd home.

"I love you, Mer", Derek whispered as they stood on the balcony outside of their bedroom.

Meredith looked up at him and stared into his blue eyes. "I love you, too", she said with a smile, kissing him softly.

They left the house shortly after and made their way to a little restaurant in town. Linda would be leaving tonight, and they wanted to make sure they spent the whole day together. Meredith never expected for everything to go so smoothly. She thought for sure that she'd be counting down the hours until the plane arrived to take her future mother-in-law back to the other side of the country. But Meredith found herself trying to make the most of every minute she had with Linda.

Over the last three days, the two had grown unbelievably close—certainly closer than Meredith and Ellis had ever been. Meredith poured her heart out to the woman after having only known her for several hours. And Linda listened to Meredith's every word. She made Meredith feel comfortable and like a welcomed member of the family.

Linda was becoming the caring, compassionate mother that Meredith never had. She had felt the same way with Susan before she died so suddenly. It was as though Meredith was finally getting the chance to have the mother-daughter relationship she'd been hoping for all of her life.

After they arrived home from the restaurant, Meredith and Linda started packing. "I'm going to miss you", Meredith confessed sadly.

Linda dropped one of her sweaters onto the bed and pulled Meredith in for a hug. "Oh, sweetie, I'm going to miss you too. It's been so nice spending time with you two."

"I wish you could stay longer."

"Me too. But I'll be sure to visit. I need to make sure Derek doesn't forget about me…"

Meredith laughed. "He won't. I won't let him."

"Good. And I need you to keep him in line."

"Oh, I have no problem yelling at him", Meredith giggled. "You have nothing to worry about."

Derek walked into the room and leaned against the door. "Are you two plotting evil against me?", he joked.

"Your mom is making sure I know not to put up with your crap", she told him as he wrapped his arms around her.

"She doesn't." Derek shook his head. "If something is bothering us, we talk about it. Never go to bed angry—that's our motto."

"I'm glad to hear it. Besides, I don't see you two fighting a lot. You have a very strong relationship", Linda assured them.

"We do", Derek agreed with a nod.

"Oh, I love you two", Linda said, pulling them both into another hug. "And I want you two to come out and visit the family."

"They're going to see us for the wedding. And we're coming out in the fall…"

"For what, dear?"

"Oh. I forgot—Amy and Tom want us to be the godparents", Derek explained with a smile.

"Derek Christopher! How could you forget to tell me that? Oh that's wonderful", she gushed, kissing them both on the cheek.

"Yeah. We're excited about it", Meredith said softly, playing with the engagement ring on her finger.

"I'll make sure to have Derek's old bedroom all set up for you", Linda said with a smile.

Derek blushed furiously. "Thanks, mom. I've always wanted Meredith to check out my race car bedding…"

"Race cars?", Meredith giggled, unable to hide the growing grin on her face.

"Oh hush, Derek. You haven't used that blanket since you were ten."

"I'd love to see it", Meredith replied cheekily.

Linda laughed. "I still have it. Oh, he loved that blanket. I'll be sure to have that bedding all set up when you two visit. And for the record Derek, your bedroom is adorable", Linda said as she and Meredith attempted to zip up the overly packed suitcase.

Derek walked over and easily wrapped the zipper around the four corners of the suitcase. "Meredith gets great joy out of blackmailing me", he mused.

"This little thing?", Linda said, directing her attention to Meredith. "She would never…"

Meredith gave Derek her sweetest smile and bit her lip. Derek was right—she did love blackmailing him, what with the baby pictures that would be displayed in their new home, but she seemed to find amusement in the situation, and continued to play the innocent card.

"Mhm", Derek said with an unbelieving smirk.

"I can't wait to see it", Meredith said happily.

"And I'll make sure to set up one of the girls' rooms for Mark", Linda said with a nod. "Hopefully he'll be able to fly out there with the two of you."

"Yeah. Sounds good", Derek affirmed.

"Oh crap, he's going to be here soon to drive with us to the airport. I'll uh…go wait downstairs…", Meredith said, making her way out of the room. She knew that Mark would more than likely let himself into her home without a second thought, even though he'd never been there before. Meredith just wanted Derek to get some time with his mother before she left, considering they wouldn't see each other again until mid-July.

"Hey Grey", Mark said as Meredith opened the front door and stepped aside, allowing him to enter.

"Hi Mark", she said, tucking some hair behind her ears.

"Nice house", Mark commented as they made their way to the living room to wait for Derek and his mother to come down.

"Oh, um, thanks", Meredith smiled, sinking onto one of the couches next to Mark.

"So…", Mark started, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "Now that we're alone…"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Seriously?", she giggled, knowing he was only joking.

"Yep. I'm going to hit on you while Derek and his mom are upstairs", he kidded.

"I figured…"

"Nah, but seriously, I need to ask you something", he said, removing his arm from around her shoulder and leaning back on the couch.

Meredith furrowed her brow and looked at him. "What?", she questioned.

"Derek doesn't know what you want for Valentine's Day."

"Valentine's Day?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah. It's a holiday where people give each other things like chocolates and flowers. You know, naked angels and—"

"Ass. I know that…"

"Overrated if you ask me. Just a scheme for Hallmark to make millions off of cheesy cards", he shrugged.

"So Derek asked you to ask me?", she concluded.

"Yeah. He told me to be subtle about it."

"Because asking me straight out just screams subtle", she said sarcastically.

"I don't do subtle", he replied. "And I know you won't tell…"

"Well, do you know if he has any ideas in mind? Or is he totally clueless?"

"I gave him a few suggestions, but apparently lingerie and chocolate body paint aren't romantic enough. Besides, he said you liked to buy your own lingerie."

Meredith could feel the heat spreading across her face. "Yeah. Remind me to thank him for telling you that", she sighed.

"I even offered to take you lingerie shopping ", Mark grinned.

"And he said no?", Meredith asked in fake shock.

"I know", Mark breathed. "He sucks. So what do you want?"

"I don't know. I've never done the whole Valentine's Day thing before", Meredith said with a sigh.

"Derek told me that he didn't want to get you just flowers or candy or anything. He wants to get you something…special", Mark informed her.

"Okay…uh…" Meredith bit her lip. She had no idea about what an appropriate Valentine's Day gift was, let alone what Derek might give her.

"Sexual favors always work", Mark grinned slyly.

Meredith smacked him with a pillow. "Pervert."

"I'm just saying…" Mark threw his hands up in defense. "That gift works both ways. And it's free. You really can't go wrong."

"You know, you're sort of creepy", Meredith laughed.

"I don't see you coming up with anything", Mark shot back jokingly.

"Tell him I don't want anything—that I'm perfectly happy without any cheesy gift", Meredith said frankly. It was the truth. She really didn't want anything. She had everything she needed. Derek didn't need to give her flowers and chocolate to prove his love for her.

"Oh come on…"

"What?", she asked, genuinely confused.

Mark sighed. "If you don't tell me what you want, then _I'm_ going to have to help him. And Grey, I love you like my little sister, but do you know what torture that would be to have to go shopping with him?"

"Oh, so you would buy your little sister lingerie?", Meredith quipped.

"Fine. I'll just tell him you want a teddy bear…"

"He'll probably get me one anyway. It's Derek, so there's guaranteed to be some corniness involved", Meredith reasoned. "He'll think of something, trust me. But if he asks for any suggestions, food always works. Or surgeries. Oh, or a trip somewhere. Remember that."

"Will do", Mark nodded just as Derek made his way down the stairs with Linda's bags, his mother close behind him.

"Mark", Linda greet happily, pulling him in for a hug. "I'm so glad you could come see me off."

"Of course I came", Mark said with a smile.

Meredith walked over to Derek as Linda and Mark chatted. "Looks like your mom has a new favorite son", she whispered into his ear, her hot breath making the hair on his neck stand straight up.

"Not possible", he murmured back into her own ear, lightly nipping at her earlobe.

"Are we still on for later?", she asked quietly. Discussing their pending sex in front of Derek's mother may have been a little risky, but Meredith decided that Mark was keeping her occupied for the moment.

"Are you feeling okay?"

"I feel great", she smiled sweetly, her green eyes sparkling.

"Then yes Dr. Grey, we're still on…"

They would have kept going with their flirtations, but Mark interrupted them. "Ready to go? We don't want her to miss the flight…"

"Yeah", Derek nodded. The four of them made their way out to the car and headed for the airport. On the way there, Meredith found herself secretly wishing that Mark had driven himself to the airport so he could drive himself home. She knew sex was in the near future, and the thought of it was making her antsy. If Mark had driven himself there instead of leaving his car in her driveway, they would be able to have sex in the parking lot. But no, Mark and Derek decided it would be best to carpool.

Meredith was all about family togetherness, but as she sat in the car and stared out the window, all she could think about was Derek's tongue. In her mouth. And other places. Her porny thoughts were interrupted when Derek announced their arrival to the airport.

As they made their way to the terminal gate, Meredith's dirty thoughts dissipated and she couldn't feel anything but sadness. She and Linda had grown so close, even in the three short days she had visited. "I'm going to miss you", Meredith frowned as Linda hugged her.

"I'm going to miss you too. All of you. But I promise to call, and of course, you can call me any time, dear. Oh, and be sure to send me pictures of the house once you decorate. I'm anxious to see the finished product", Linda said with a warm smile.

"We will", Derek said, wrapping his arm around Meredith's shoulder.

"And Mark…stay out of trouble, young man", Linda said firmly, unable to hide a small smile.

"I will", Mark sighed as the two hugged.

A boarding call for her flight was announced, signaling its pending departure. "That's me", Linda said with a nod.

Linda hugged each of them one last time. "I'm so glad we got to spend time together. Now take care of my son. He needs you, and he loves you", Linda said kindly as she and Meredith were in an embrace.

"I know. I will. Bye…mom", Meredith said softly. She shocked herself a little by calling Linda mom. But somehow, it felt right. In the short time they had gotten to know each other, Meredith already considered Linda her pseudo-mother. The past three days could have been horrible and awkward, but from the minute Linda arrived, there had been a warmth and kindness that made Meredith feel comfortable.

"Goodbye, Meredith. I love you, sweetie", Linda smiled, kissing Meredith's cheek.

"Love you too", Meredith responded. It was true. She wasn't just saying it to be polite. She really did love Linda. As far as mothers-in-law went, Meredith considered herself blessed and lucky. It really shouldn't have surprised her. After all, Linda Shepherd had raised the love of her life.

--

Later that evening when Meredith and Derek were finally alone, Meredith's previous porny thoughts returned. "Ready?", Meredith asked as she walked out of her private bathroom wearing nothing but her bath towel.

Derek groaned as she dropped the towel and walked over to him. She rolled on top of him and kissed him softly. "I love you", she whispered.

Derek ran his hands down the bare skin of her back and began sucking on her neck. "I love you, too."

"Mmm", Meredith moaned, letting the sensations take over her body. The tingling in her core. The feeling of his erection growing beneath her. The attention he was giving to her body.

"I believe we had a deal…", he whispered seductively.

"We did", she giggled.

"All night."

"Mhm", she sighed.

"So today Mark and I were talking…", she started.

"Way to kill the mood", he joked, flipping them over so that she was pinned beneath him.

"He told me you were stressing over Valentine's Day", she replied, running her fingers through his hair.

"Good to know he can keep a secret", Derek joked. "Don't worry about it. I already have some things in mind."

"Do you?"

Derek grinned. "I do."

"Hmm…can't wait", she responded. "Is this part of it?"

"You being naked? Of course", he nodded. "No holiday would be complete without sex…"

"Good", she whispered. "You should be naked right now."

"I agree." Derek sat up and quickly undressed only to hover over her once again.

The sight of his naked body made her tremble with need. "Mmm…make love to me, Derek", she moaned, bracing her hands on his shoulders.

Derek kissed her softly before sliding inside of her. "I love you, Meredith", he whispered, kissing her forehead, feeling her muscles clench around him in ecstasy.

"Love you too", she panted breathlessly. The emotional closeness they were sharing were something they never wanted to lose. They knew the feeling would last for a lifetime. A lifetime they would be spending together.

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	19. Girls' Day Out

**Disclaimer: I'm just a college kid. There is no owning of any kind.**

"Are you sure you can't go?", Meredith asked as she poured some coffee into her travel mug.

Derek laughed. "I don't think the groom is supposed to go to the bridal shop. Besides, what if you find a dress today and I see you in it? Bad luck."

"Hmm. That's true. We need to start off on the right foot. No bad luck…"

"No bad luck", Derek agreed, walking over to wrap his arms around her. "When are you leaving?"

"Now-ish", Meredith murmured as she pressed her lips to his.

"No time for a quickie on the counter?"

"Ugh", she groaned.

"What do you mean 'ugh'?", he asked amusedly.

"I'm all bloaty and…ick. And I probably should have told Izzie to move our bridal shop extravaganza to next weekend, but…oh well. It might be fun, right?", she rambled.

"Sure it will be. Just go have fun with your friends", Derek said with a smile, kissing her forehead.

Meredith laughed. "Izzie told me to go in there prepared. But I really have no idea what I'm doing."

"That's okay. Cristina doesn't either. But Izzie knows enough for both of you. You'll be fine."

"Any color preferences?"

"You could wear a glow in the dark wedding dress and I wouldn't care. As long as we're married at the end of the day, that's all that matters to me", he said with a smile.

"So I could get like…neon orange maid-of-honor dresses and you'd be cool with that?"

Derek grinned. "Absolutely. Although I'm not sure how Izzie and Cristina would feel about it."

"I know those two are going to be a pain in the ass agreeing on something", Meredith sighed.

"Don't just settle on something you don't want. I want you to like the dresses they pick."

"Oh I know. I already told them I'm getting the final say", Meredith replied.

"Good", Derek smiled.

"Hey guys", Izzie greeted as she stepped into the kitchen, a smile on her face.

"Hey Iz", Meredith responded.

"Is Cristina here yet?"

Meredith shook her head. "Nope. But she should be here soon."

"She better not be hiding out somewhere at the hospital."

"I told her we could go out to lunch afterward. Food is always a good incentive", Meredith said with a nod, biting into a cupcake.

"Especially for you. And cupcakes aren't breakfast", Derek laughed.

"Yes they are", Meredith said with a mouthful of chocolate cupcake. It wasn't necessarily healthy, but she couldn't resist chocolate, even if it was 10:00 in the morning.

Izzie reached for a cupcake off the counter. "I agree."

"When you two decide you want a real breakfast, there's always Muesli in the cabinet…", Derek told them, knowing they would never eat it.

"That stuff tastes like the forest floor. Twigs in a box." Meredith scrunched her nose. "I'll stick with chocolate."

"Fine", Derek laughed, pulling her close and kissing her.

Just then, Cristina walked into the kitchen. "Ready?"

"Hey Cristina", Izzie said with a smile. "Yep, we can go. As soon as Mer…"

Cristina sighed. "Okay, seriously, can you two do this later?", she asked, referring to Meredith and Derek's make-out session by the refrigerator.

"Hmm", Meredith said, pulling back from the kiss. "Yeah. I'm ready."

"Great", Cristina grinned sarcastically.

"So what are you doing today?", Meredith whispered to Derek as the four of them made their way to the front door.

"I have a cordotomy in an hour. I should be home around three. Take your time though, have fun", Derek smiled, kissing her one last time before the three of them left the house and made their way to the bridal shop.

--

"Ooh, this one is nice", Izzie beamed as she took a pale pink dress off the rack and held it up to show Meredith and Cristina.

"Oh you're not serious?", Cristina asked dryly.

"What? What's wrong with it?"

"The color. The beading. The cut at the top. Not all of us have the boobs of a model", Cristina reminded her.

"Fine. What about this one?", Meredith asked, pointing to an olive green dress on the mannequin.

"No", Izzie said firmly. "That's not a summery color. And the bow on the ass is awful."

Meredith sighed. "Okay, well, what are the summer colors so I know what I'm looking for?" She figured it would be easier to look for maid of honor dresses first, and save the wedding gown for later. But she was finding out that she probably should just leave Izzie and Cristina by themselves and go off on her own. Maybe then there would be some sort of progress.

"Orange, yellow, pink, turquoise, bright green, purple. Those are your main summer colors", Izzie said confidently. It appeared as though Izzie knew more about wedding attire than their consultant, who had abandoned them fifteen minutes ago to help another customer.

"Out of those, which colors do you both like?", Meredith asked, leaning against a wall mirror.

"I like all of them except the bright green. It won't look right with my skin tone", Izzie told them.

"No pinks", Cristina said, shaking her head.

"So no green or pink. Got it", Meredith said with a nod. "And I don't like orange."

"So that leaves us with yellow, turquoise, and purple. Are we all okay with those?", Izzie asked them.

Meredith and Cristina nodded in agreement. "I still like the canary yellow", Meredith said with a shrug.

"Yellow is good. And it's summery too", Izzie said with a smile. "Cristina?"

"Sure, yeah, fine", Cristina yawned.

"Seriously?"

Cristina nodded. "Yeah. Yellow is nice."

"Did we just agree on something?", Meredith asked in shock. She thought for sure that their trip to the bridal shop would be unsuccessful, at least when it came to choosing dresses for her friends.

Surprisingly, they found the perfect dress that all three of them approved of. It was a short, canary yellow, halter dress made of chiffon and clipdot fabric with charmeuse trim along the V neckline and empire waist. It was flowy and summery—perfect for a July wedding. And they could even wear it again if they wanted to.

After the tailor did the adjustments that had to be made, and details of when they would be needed were settled, the three made their way to the wedding dress section.

"I want a dress that pushes my boobs up", Meredith said. "But I don't want to look slutty."

"Derek would appreciate it though", Izzie joked.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "He told me to get something that was easy to take off."

"You two are like sex-crazed teenagers", Cristina said. "You would have had sex in the kitchen earlier if we hadn't been there."

"We've had sex in the kitchen before", Meredith laughed.

Izzie's mouth dropped. "What? The kitchen where I bake?"

"We've had sex in every room of the house", Meredith shrugged, biting her lip.

"Oh my God…"

"We always clean up afterward. You wouldn't even have known if I didn't say anything", Meredith reasoned.

"Come on. Let's find you a dress", Cristina groaned. "The image of you and Shepherd having wild screaming orgasms on the kitchen table is making me nauseous."

Meredith blushed. And unfortunately, Izzie noticed. "Seriously? The kitchen table?"

"I um…yeah. But only a few times…"

"More than once?"

"That's wrong", Cristina sighed as she began looking through the large racks of wedding dresses.

Thankfully, Izzie's pending rant over Meredith's sexual endeavors was interrupted when she spotted a dress she liked. "Oh Mer, this one is beautiful…"

"Too poufy." Meredith scrunched her nose.

"Do you want a form fitting dress?", Cristina asked.

"You have a kick-ass body. You could pull off any dress in here", Izzie said honestly.

"I want a form fitting one, I think. It's going to be hot outside, and I don't want to be sweating my ass off."

"Strapless?"

Meredith pondered for a moment. "Yes. And no train. Or veil."

"Okay. Well, let's try to find a few of those for her to try on", Izzie said as she began searching through a plethora of white gowns.

After two hours of searching and trying on dresses, Meredith finally narrowed it down to two that she absolutely loved. Izzie had the idea of taking Meredith's picture in both of them so she could show her friends and get their opinions.

"I never thought I'd find a dress that fast." Meredith thought for sure she'd still be looking for a dress a week before the wedding. But the two she had chosen were both simple and beautiful, yet elegant and light enough for an outdoor summer wedding.

"I love them, Mer. I may need to borrow yours for my own wedding one day", Izzie said happily as the three of them sat in Joe's for a quick bite to eat that Cristina had been promised.

"Speaking of…that…you and Alex seemed pretty chummy during lunch yesterday at work…", Meredith hinted, hoping she would elaborate.

"Oh…I um…well…we're uh…", Izzie stammered nervously.

"What the hell is wrong with you?", Cristina asked, taking a sip of her beer.

"When Derek's mom was here, and we had to share my room, I don't know, we just talked…", Izzie said quietly.

"Is that code for sex?", Cristina joked.

"Cristina", Meredith said exasperated. "So what did you two…talk about?"

"Stuff…life", Izzie admitted. "And we decided that…we're going to try again…to be a couple."

"Iz", Meredith said happily. "That's great."

Izzie blushed. "Yeah. Thanks."

"So are we…? Is this…a secret?", Meredith asked.

"Oh, well, no. We've only been a sort-of-couple for a few days", Izzie told her friends as she nervously fidgeted with her napkin. It really wasn't a secret. She just didn't necessarily want it announced to the hospital yet. But she knew that she could count on her two best friends to keep it to themselves for a while. "Actually we're going out tonight."

"Good for you, Iz", Meredith said sincerely. She knew that both Izzie and Alex had been unlucky in love for the past year. And that they had been the happiest when they were together. She cared deeply for both of them, and she was genuinely happy that they were trying to make it work again.

"Are Bambi and your sister getting together?", Cristina asked before realizing that she was gossiping. "Damn, I need to get away from the two of you. Pretty soon we're going to be braiding each other's hair singing songs." She took a huge sip of her beer and leaned back in the booth.

Meredith just laughed. "They're been living together for a while, so maybe."

"The apartment they're living in sucks", Izzie told them. "I visited once and I don't think I'll be going back."

"Derek told me that Sloan got an apartment too…apparently he's having the new OB over for dinner", Meredith laughed. She enjoyed the time spent with her friends. The hospital kept them plenty busy, but getting to spend an afternoon with her maids of honor and best friends.

--

"Hey you", Derek said with a smile as Meredith entered the kitchen.

She walked over to him and kissed his cheek. "What's all this?"

"Dinner", Derek said as he disposed of the take-out bags. "I stopped on the way home and got us tacos. I remember you saying that you wanted them, so I decided to be a good fiancé and get them for you. Well, all of us. I bought enough for Izzie and Alex too."

"Aww, Der", Meredith said with a smile, wrapping her arms around him. "This is why I keep you around."

"For the food I bring you?"

"And the sex", she added, popping a tortilla chip into her mouth.

"Is that all?", he laughed.

"You know that I love you. I'd love you even if you didn't bring me food or give me sex", she said, pressing her lips against his own.

"Even still, I'll never stop doing either of those things."

"I appreciate that", she giggled.

"So how was it?", Derek asked, scooping extra salsa onto Meredith's plate, knowing how much she liked it. He swore that Meredith would be content just eating the stuff out of the jar. Give her a spoon and she'd be all set.

"We got dresses for Iz and Cristina. Yellow—is yellow okay?"

"Yellow is great", Derek smiled. "So they actually agreed on something."

Meredith took her seat at the island. "Yeah. It wasn't that hard actually."

"Do you like the dresses?", he asked, taking a seat next to her.

"I love them", Meredith assured him. "I told them I liked yellow and we decided on one that all of us liked. It's knee length and has all of these French named things that I can't pronounce. And they can wear it again. I'm sort of surprised we found something that fast."

"How about you?", Derek asked before scooping a large spoonful for sour cream onto his taco.

"That's a lot of sour cream", Meredith pointed out with a mouthful of food.

Derek laughed. "You're the one with more salsa than taco on her plate."

"I like salsa", Meredith shrugged, not even bothering to swallow before talking. She didn't have to pretend around him. She could talk with her mouth full and burp as she pleased, and knew Derek wouldn't care. In fact, Meredith was sure that she could out-drink and out-eat him on any given day.

"I can see that", he said with a nod and a smile. "So did you…find anything you liked?"

"I narrowed it down to two. I have pictures of myself in both of them saved on my phone, but I can't show you. Bad luck."

"Me and my stupid rule", he smirked. "Well, what do they look like?"

Meredith took a drink of her water. "Fine. I guess I'll give you some clues. They're both strapless."

"Good. Straps take longer to get off", Derek said, kissing her cheek. "I'm all about easy access."

"Mhm", Meredith smirked. "They both have a sweetheart neckline with—"

"What's a sweetheart neckline?", he interrupted.

"It means it sort of dips down between my boobs, but it's not slutty or anything", Meredith stated simply, trying to give him a visual.

He grinned. "I think I like the sweetheart neckline."

"I bet you do...", Meredith smirked. "If you want the fancy names for things, you're gonna have to ask Izzie, but the fabric and how they're cut at the bottom is different. One's frillier and one's flowier. And the beading is different. I love both of them, but I couldn't choose. So I'm going to show people at work, get their opinions…", she explained before taking another bite.

"I'm sure you look beautiful in both of them." Derek took her hand and squeezed it gently.

Meredith smiled and kissed him softly. "Aww, thank you. I'm leaning toward one because it goes better with their yellow dresses, but I might change my mind. We'll see."

"We still have time. I mean, if you wanted to look around some more…", Derek said with a nod. He didn't want her to feel pressured or rushed to pick out a dress. He wanted her to find a dress that she loved. It couldn't be any dress off the rack. It had to be _the_ dress.

"Oh it's definitely one of these two. I love both of them", Meredith sighed softly, a contented smile on her face.

"So good day?"

"Good day", Meredith said definitively. "How was your cordotomy?"

"Textbook", he said with a nod. A small speck of sauce from the taco dripped down his chin. Meredith licked her thumb and proceeded to wipe it away. "What are you doing?"

Meredith looked up at him. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing…that was just very…wife-ish", he grinned.

Meredith smiled. She didn't even think about what she was doing, she just did it as though it were a habit. Lately, she had been doing wifely things, like buying his shampoo or deodorant on the rare occasion she went to the grocery store, or fixing the collar of his lab coat after one of their on-call room quickies. "Oh", she said, blushing slightly.

"You're adorable", he chuckled, kissing her cheek.

"Why?"

He shrugged. "You just are." Meredith furrowed her brow and looked at him curiously, a small smile tugging on the corners of her lips.

"It's just that…when you do things like that, I fall even more in love with you", he said sweetly.

"We take care of each other", Meredith smiled. "You feed me and in return I wipe off your chin."

"We make a perfect team."

"Yes we do", he laughed, leaning closer to her and kissing her softly.

"So are you gonna give me any clues about Valentine's Day?"

Derek laughed. "How many times are you going to ask me that?"

"Until you tell me something", she replied.

"All I can say is that I think you'll enjoy the day I have planned. And the gifts…"

"Gifts?", she prodded.

"Yes, gifts."

Meredith took another bite. "What kind of gifts?"

"Not telling you."

"Ass", she pouted, a cute frown on her face.

"Like I said…adorable", he teased, tucking some hair behind her ear and kissing her forehead.

They really were the perfect team.

**I love reviews. :)**


	20. Valentine's Day Pt 1

**Disclaimer: If I owned Grey's Anatomy, Meredith and Derek would walk around naked all the time. They wouldn't have a job, they wouldn't have skills, they wouldn't even know how to read. They would just be…naked. Yep, I stole that from Cristina. Clearly I don't own the show.**

**Thanks to those that review. I really appreciate it.**

Meredith hadn't slept this late since the day after she and Derek had gotten engaged, and he insisted they take the day off. But today was Valentines' Day. Luckily it was a Saturday in which both of them were off from work. Of course, it wasn't just a coincidence. Derek had pulled a few strings, and Meredith was extremely grateful to him for doing so.

Derek planned on pampering her all day long. Meredith's only requirement was to sleep in. And he gladly agreed. The hospital had been wearing them out lately, and getting the chance to cuddle under the blankets for a few extra hours was a welcomed treat.

Derek gently rolled over in the bed, careful not to wake her. The sun was already shining through the windows, but Meredith didn't seem to notice. The snores kept coming from her small body snuggled under the soft blanket.

He peered over at the clock. 10:30. He decided that he had been sleeping for far too long. He carefully eased out of bed and tiptoed quietly out of the room. Knowing that Meredith would wake up soon, Derek went into the kitchen and began making her breakfast. While he was making French toast, he heard the soft patter of feet making their way into the kitchen. "Hey", she said quietly, still in her sleepy state.

Derek lowered the flame on the stove and walked over to her, chuckling slightly at her disheveled appearance. "Hey you. Happy Valentine's Day." He kissed her softly and pulled her in for a hug.

"Happy Valentine's Day", she whispered, resting her head on his chest, breathing in his comforting scent.

"I love you." He kissed the top of her head, his arms still wrapped around her.

Meredith smiled. No matter how many times he said it to her, she would never get tired of hearing it. "I love you, too."

"You ruined my surprise. I was going to bring you breakfast in bed", he chuckled.

"I can eat down here", she offered.

"Nope. I'm pampering you today", he told her, walking back over to the stove and removing the food from the pan before setting it on the tray adorned with eggs, bacon, waffles, and orange juice.

"That's a lot of food", Meredith pointed out, pouring herself a cup of coffee.

Derek laughed. "If there's anyone I know that can eat it, it's you."

"What's that supposed to mean?", she smirked, putting her hands on her hips.

"It means you have a hearty appetite, which is just one of the many things I love about you", he explained with a grin. "Now come on, let's go back to bed…"

"That's stupid. All of the food is down here. Really, its fine", she told him, pulling out one of the kitchen chairs.

"Are you seriously going to make me do this?" He walked over to her and threw her over his shoulder.

"Derek! Put me down!", she yelled, kicking her legs and pounding him on the ass with her tiny ineffectual fists. "Seriously, Derek!", she giggled.

Derek just laughed, paying no attention to her pleas to walk on her own. Instead, he proceeded to make the trek up the stairs, Meredith in his safe grip.

Eventually, Meredith stopped fighting against him, realizing he wasn't going to put her down. "Don't drop me", she huffed.

"I would never drop you", he told her as they made their way up the steps and down the hall.

"Morning", Alex and Izzie greeted, moving to the side to allow the two to pass by.

"Hey", Meredith smiled, still slung over his shoulder. "Happy Valentine's Day", she called out as they neared her bedroom.

"You too", Alex called back. "I'm sort of thankful we have work today", he whispered to Izzie.

"Seriously. It's not even noon and already they're starting", she said amusedly.

"Just wait until tonight…", Alex reminded her.

Izzie sighed. "I don't even want to think about it…"

"Can you please put me down now?", Meredith asked as they entered the bedroom. "I'm starting to feel woozy."

Derek gently placed her on the unmade bed, pulling the covers back over her. "Stay here. Don't move…", he said with a smile, kissing her cheek.

"I hate you", she said jokingly, unable to hide the smile tugging on the corners of her mouth.

He laughed. "No you don't."

"Fine. I don't. Now bring me my food", she ordered, propping some pillows behind her back in preparation for the breakfast he had made for them.

"Bossy."

"You like bossy", Meredith smiled, shooing him away. "Now go…"

Derek just laughed and obeyed her command, making his way downstairs to retrieve their food. Meredith sat in bed and smiled to herself. This whole Valentine's Day thing could be okay after all. She'd only been awake for fifteen minutes and Derek was already laying on the McDreamy charm thicker than usual. He may have been corny, but she really did appreciate him. Not just today, but every day. He always made her feel loved. And she knew he'd make her feel that way forever.

"Here you go, my lady", he said with a grin, settling the tray over her legs.

"Your lady?", she asked mockingly.

"That's what you are, now and forever", he smiled.

Meredith giggled. "You've already out-cheesed yourself."

"Out-cheesed myself?", he asked amusedly. He loved all of her made-up words. Meredith never ceased to make him laugh, even if she wasn't trying to be funny. She just had this way about her that made him grateful that he'd be spending the rest of his life with her.

"Yes", she answered biting into a piece of bacon.

"Well, I'm going to be out-cheesing myself all day", he laughed. He opened the nightstand drawer on his side of the bed and pulled out a Valentine's Day card with her name written on the envelope. "This is for you. And I have more for you downstairs. Be right back."

He quickly kissed her cheek before hopping off the bed and making his way back downstairs. A few moments later, he reappeared in the doorway holding the trademark Valentine's Day gifts of a teddy bear, a heart-shaped box of chocolates, and a bouquet of lavender flowers.

"What's all this?", Meredith asked, taking a sip of her coffee, the still unopened card resting on the side of the tray.

He got back into bed and kissed her forehead. "These are just some of your gifts", he grinned.

"Nobody's ever gotten me Valentine's presents before", she said with a small smile. "Well Sammy…"

"Your three year old boyfriend", Derek teased.

Meredith giggled. "He gave me a cupcake, but that doesn't really count considering we shared it."

"So I'm taking your Valentine's Day virginity?", he asked with a smirk.

"Yeah. I guess you are", she agreed, kissing him softly. "So this is what people do?"

"You've really never done this before?"

"No I've never done this before", she said with a soft smile.

"Okay. Well, this is how it works…I give you gifts all day long, take you places, kiss you nonstop, and we end the day by making love all night long", he explained, kissing her again.

"Hmm…I think I like Valentine's Day", she grinned.

"Me too", he replied, stealing a bite of her waffle. "Open your card…"

"Okay", she whispered. She picked it up and proceeded to open the envelope. Meredith pulled the card out and opened it, smiling softly as she began reading the note written on an attached piece of paper folded on the inside, the message too long to fit in the four by six card.

_Dear Meredith,_

_By the time you read this, I'm sure you'll have already mocked me for being corny. But that's okay—I know you love me anyway. The truth is, you're the first person I've ever met who didn't want gifts on Valentine's Day. You'd be perfectly happy spending the day lounging around the house. I'm definitely marrying an indoor girl. Anyway, my point in this note is not to tease you, I promise. _

_The real reason I'm writing this is to thank you—thank you for making me believe in love again. For saving me from myself, for forgiving me even after all we've been through. For everything. The path we've taken to make it to this point hasn't always been smooth. Sometimes I still don't think I deserve to be spending the rest of my life with you. Even as I write this, I still can't believe that we're engaged and getting married in five months. _

_I'll never forget the first time I saw you, the little blonde in the black dress with the bright green eyes sitting on the barstool in Joe's, shooting back shot after shot of tequila. To this day, I still don't know how you can drink that stuff straight. But then again, you never cease to amaze me. You, Meredith Grey, are a beautiful person inside and out. You're warm and kind and always putting others before yourself. You're a brilliant surgeon whose skills and compassion are unmatched by anyone I've ever seen._

_I find myself falling more and more in love with you every day. Who knew that our one night stand would lead to a lifetime together? Some may call it a coincidence, but I call it fate. Before I met you, I never knew a love like this existed—a love that takes your breath away and makes you think that any second, you'll wake up from a dream. You've given me a second chance to find love. And I'm forever grateful to you for that. You're going to be an amazing wife and an even more beautiful mother. You are an extraordinary person, Meredith. _

_Our journey has only just begun. We're finally getting the lifetime, our happily ever after. I love you. Forever._

_Love,_

_Derek_

"Derek", Meredith whispered, tears spilling down her cheeks. She rested her head on his shoulder and he pulled her close to him.

He gently kissed the top of her head, breathing in the familiar lavender scent. "I love you", he said softly.

"I love you, too." She took his hand and laced her fingers with his own. "That was…"

"Too much?"

"No", Meredith laughed softly. "It was perfect. No one's ever…done something like that for me before, or said anything like that…"

"I meant every word", he said genuinely, gently caressing her hand with his thumb.

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "Thank you."

"Mhm", he murmured, pressing her lips to his once again.

"I got you a card too", she told him as they broke the kiss. "But I'm not giving it to you until we're on the ferryboat…"

He looked at her with a confused expression. "Ferryboat?"

"Yeah. That's my gift to you—a ferry ride. And later on tonight, I thought we could stay at the trailer…and my body is my gift to you", she grinned seductively.

"I can take full advantage?"

Meredith nodded. "I'm all yours…"

"Well then, after you eat, we should probably get our day started. We have to make sure to get all of our activities in before the bedroom activity can begin…", he smiled, kissing her cheek.

"Then how about you go off your health food diet for the day and help me finish all this food", she giggled.

"I guess I could do that", he said with a laugh, stealing a bite of her scrambled eggs.

"So where are we going for lunch?", she asked with a mouthful of waffle.

Derek laughed. "Anywhere you want." Her appetite really was insatiable.

--

"I can't believe we've never done this before", Meredith said, resting her head against Derek's shoulder. The two were standing by the rail of the ferryboat, looking out across the Elliott Bay, the great expanse of downtown Seattle ahead of them.

Meredith had been thinking about what kind of gift Derek might want for Valentine's Day. She knew that he wasn't the kind of guy who was into material possessions. He just enjoyed spending time with her. So taking a ride on a ferryboat seemed like a very Derek-y gift.

"I love it, Mer. Thank you." Derek pulled her body close to his, the warmth radiating between them. The sun was shining, but it was still a February day in Seattle, which meant the chill in the air was still lingering. Meredith clutched her hot chocolate in her hands, while Derek held his in the hand that was wrapped around her shoulder.

"Did you want to open your card?", she asked nervously, biting her lip. After the card from him, Meredith was sure that hers wouldn't even compare, but she knew Derek would love it anyway.

"Sure", Derek grinned, kissing her forehead. "Are your warm enough?"

Meredith nodded. "I'm good." She pulled a card in a white envelope from her pocket and handed it to him. "Here", she said with a small smile.

"Thank you", Derek said, returning the grin. After opening the envelope, he pulled out card, finding that she, too, had a folded piece of paper on the inside.

"Sorry. It's probably—well, never mind. I um…just read it", she stammered nervously.

Derek gave her an assuring smile before unfolding the message.

_Dear Derek,_

_So here we are. On the ferryboat. And it's Valentine's Day. I'm sort of surprised that we've never been on one together before. You have your thing for ferryboats, and, well, it's just weird. But I'm glad we're here. At least I think that's where we'll be when you read this. I hope so anyway, because I wanted to do something nice for you. As you can tell, I've never written a Valentine's Day card before so if this sucks, I apologize in advance. Am I rambling? I think I'm rambling._

_Anyway, my point isn't to ramble. My point is that it's Valentine's Day. And I'm here with you. Because we're engaged, which honestly, still freaks me out—but in the best possible way, I promise. We're finally getting what we wanted. A year ago, I never would have guessed that I would be wearing an engagement ring this Valentine's Day. I never thought we'd be building a house or planning a wedding. Stuff like this doesn't happen to people like me. Sometimes, I still wonder why anybody would want to marry me, the scary and damaged girl with a crap load of issues. But you love me anyway._

_For the first time in my life, I feel unconditionally loved. I know that I can always count on you to be there for me, no matter what. When I'm with you, everything is just better. And this is going to sound corny, but you really are it for me. Yeah, seeing that in print, I realize that it was indeed corny. But hey, you like stuff like that, right? _

_My whole point in writing this is to tell you that I love you. I love you in this huge way that I can't even begin to explain to you. But I know I don't have to, because you love me just as much. I feel blessed and __lucky knowing that soon we'll be husband and wife. And one day, mommy and daddy. Great, now I'm making myself get all teary-eyed so I think this is a good place to stop._

_I love you, Derek. I really really love you. I know that it's unoriginal, but you really are the love of my life, my knight in shining whatever. Scrubs, I guess. My knight in shining scrubs._

_Love,_

_Meredith_

"Meredith Grey", Derek said in astonishment, looking into her eyes, a slight blush spreading across her cheeks.

Meredith bit her lip before rambling nervously. "I um…it's probably sucky but I really didn't know what to—"

Derek cut her off before she could continue by pressing his lips against hers, unable to resist the urge to kiss her. Meredith moaned out loud, not caring about the other people on the ferryboat hearing her. Derek slid his tongue into her mouth and she sighed contentedly. Together, their tongues dueled in a passionate frenzy of lust and love, so deep that neither wanted to part. It was amazing how much they could communicate without words.

"I love you. I love you so much", Derek whispered breathlessly as they parted, tucking some windblown strands of hair behind her ear.

Meredith rested her head on his chest. "I love you, too."

"Your card…beautiful", he grinned, kissing the top of her head.

"I tried", Meredith sighed, her cheek nuzzled against the warmth of his sweater. "Hopefully they'll get better over the years."

"Mer, that was perfect", he assured her, wrapping her in his tight embrace. "It makes me want to throw you on the ground of this ferryboat and have my way with you in front of the ferry-goers", he teased.

Meredith giggled. "I think that's illegal."

"Fine. I'll just wait until tonight then", he laughed. "I'd rather not get us arrested on Valentine's Day."

"Although…handcuffs might be fun", she pointed out, breaking out into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.

"There's an idea", Derek grinned.

"See. My porny mind comes in handy sometimes."

"I guess it does", Derek agreed, tilting her chin up to meet his eyes before kissing her softly.

Valentine's Day had already become one of their favorite holidays, and the day had only just begun.

**So I decided to split this into two or maybe even three chapters. It's going to be mostly fluff. This is their first Valentine's Day together, and I wanted to make it special for them. Hope you enjoyed it! :)**

**Reviews mean the world to me. :)**


	21. Valentine's Day Pt 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. But if Shonda wants to use any of this fluff, she's more than welcome to do so. More MerDer fluff, I say.**

**Thanks for the reviews! They really do mean a lot to me. **

"What are you thinking about?", Meredith whispered, her head still resting against his chest as the ferry continued to make its way to downtown Seattle where they would be spending part of their day.

Derek snapped out of his trance and smiled at her. "Hmm? Oh, I was just wondering when to give you your next gift."

"Derek, I—"

"I know. You don't want anything", Derek smirked. "But that's just too bad."

Meredith smiled. "Is it?"

"It is." Derek tilted her chin up and kissed her softly. "So I was thinking we could go there for lunch", he pointed to nowhere in particular.

"Where?", she asked, confused by his vagueness.

Derek pointed toward the downtown area. "There."

"Don't make me call you an ass on Valentine's Day", Meredith warned, unable to hide the smile tugging on her lips.

"I don't want to ruin the surprise…"

"Fine. Don't tell me", Meredith shrugged. "But it better be worth the mocking."

"Trust me…" Derek kissed her again. "It will be."

After they got off the ferryboat, Derek waved a cab down and gave the driver directions, making sure Meredith couldn't hear the conversation, much to her chagrin.

However, any annoyance quickly disappeared when the cab pulled up to the destination several minutes later. "Der", Meredith gasped.

"Aren't you glad I didn't spoil the surprise for you?"

"Oh my God…", Meredith whispered in shock as Derek paid the cab driver before getting out of the car. He walked around and opened the door, taking her hand into his own.

"You planned this?", Meredith asked as she and Derek made their way to the elevator that would be taking them up to the Space Needle where they would be dining.

Derek laughed. "Of course I planned it."

"Seriously?", she asked, still in awe over his more than generous gift to her.

"Seriously", Derek chuckled. "I remember you saying that you'd never been here before so I decided it would be fun for us to come here for lunch."

"Thank you, Derek", Meredith whispered, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss him softly.

"They're also going to let us book one of the smaller private rooms for the rehearsal dinner", he grinned. At first, Meredith had wanted to have the reception at the Space Needle, but after seeing how beautiful Derek's land looked at sunset, she changed her mind, and wanted to have the wedding and the reception all in one place. So instead they opted to have the rehearsal dinner here.

"Really?", she asked as they boarded the elevator and made their way to the top. The buildings surrounding them looking smaller and smaller as they ascended.

Derek nodded. "Yep. They said we could take our pick. Any room we want is ours."

"How did you…?"

"I have ways", he replied simply, quirking his eyebrows.

Meredith smirked at him. "Ways, huh?"

"After we decided on July 12 a few weeks ago, I called to reserve a spot. I know I should have told you, but I wanted it to be a surprise", Derek said with an honest smile. "I've had this Valentine's Day lunch reserved since we got back together. The whole rehearsal dinner thing was just an added bonus."

"You had this planned for that long?"

"Yeah", he shrugged.

Meredith wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him softly. "I love you."

"I love you too", he whispered. Just then, the elevator doors opened, signaling their destination to the top of the Space Needle.

"Wow", Meredith gasped as they made their way toward the restaurant, all the while looking out across the Seattle skyline, which was spinning ever so slowly around them.

Derek chuckled and kissed her cheek. "You're so cute when you get excited."

"I'm just…this is…I've never been here before and it's…I'm glad I'm here with you", she said with a smile.

"I'm glad I'm here with you too." He gave her hand a gentle squeeze as they made their way to the hostess, who quickly seated them at a small table by the side with a breathtaking view of Seattle.

"I'm guessing this table wasn't just a coincidence", Meredith said with a knowing grin. Derek really went all out to make this day special for her, and she was grateful to him.

"Maybe, maybe not", he said casually, picking up the menu.

Meredith giggled. "That's what I thought…"

The two spent their lunch making conversation that always came easy to them. There were never any awkward silences or a loss for things to say. They talked about work, and the wedding, and caught up on each other's lives. This was their first day off in almost three weeks, and they had been exhausted when they got home. They were even too tired to have sex let alone talk. The day off was certainly appreciated.

"So I was talking to Lexie yesterday at lunch", Meredith began, biting into a piece of cheesecake she had ordered for dessert.

"Yeah?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. We got to talking and…we're babysitting Laura again."

"Oh…okay", Derek smiled. The last time they babysat Laura, Derek was genuinely surprised by how great Meredith was with the baby. She was so nervous that something would go wrong, but everything went perfectly fine. They actually had fun.

"Yeah, well, we get the four day weekend next month for spring break or whatever."

"Spring break?", Derek chuckled.

"Shut up. You know what I mean. For the conferences I guess" Meredith huffed.

"I know", he said with a laugh. "I just enjoy your terminology."

"Ass", she smirked. "Anyway, Lexie told me that Molly and Eric invited her along for a mini-vacation. They know that she's an intern and doesn't really get many vacations so they thought it would be nice for her to go. I think they're going to visit Thatcher too while Molly and Eric are in town. Anyway, so I volunteered us to babysit, but it'll only be for two days, so we still have two days to ourselves…", Meredith rambled.

"Oh, so this is like an overnight thing?"

"Yeah, I um…is that okay? They wanted to drop her off Wednesday night after we get off from work, and they'll pick her up Saturday morning-ish, so it's only two full days really. We'll still have two whole days to ourselves", Meredith explained. "Sorry I should have cleared it with you. I got excited and sort of volunteered us."

"You got excited?", Derek beamed. He loved that she cared for her niece. A year ago, the thought of babysitting for an hour would have freaked her out, and now she willingly volunteered them to babysit for two days.

Meredith shrugged, blushing slightly. "Yeah. It's just…she's a good baby and she's cute…and its good practice."

Derek swore his heart skipped a beat when she said that. He couldn't help but lean across the table and kiss her. "I love you", he said softly as they pulled back.

"What was that for?", she asked, a blush spreading across her cheeks.

"Because. I'm in love with you", he said simply.

"I love you too", she giggled, finishing off the last piece of cheesecake. "So you're really okay with it?"

"Absolutely", Derek said with a nod. "Can't wait."

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

"I'm just glad it isn't on the weekend we're going to Sonoma", Derek mentioned casually.

"Hmm?", Meredith asked with a confused expression.

"Oh, Sonoma? That's just another one of my gifts. Forty-eight uninterrupted hours", Derek said with a huge grin. "We never went, and I know how much you were looking forward to it…"

"I…seriously?"

"Yeah. We're going in April."

"Do you realize how much time we're taking off? They're going to fire me."

Derek shrugged. "I'm Richard's favorite attending. And I let him live on my land for a few months before he moved back with Adele. He owes me. And you're the most brilliant resident in the whole group. I think we can afford to take a weekend off. Besides, I already cleared it with the chief and bought the tickets."

"I'm not the best in the group. And you don't have as much pull as you think you do", Meredith smirked.

"You'd be surprised how much pull I have. And yes, you are the best, most brilliant surgeon I've ever seen. And the most beautiful and funny and—"

"Stop." Meredith rolled her eyes.

"My point is…this is my gift to you. We're going to wine country whether you like it or not", he said in mock seriousness.

"Thank you, Derek. It's…I know I joke around, but I really do appreciate it.", Meredith said with a genuine smile.. "But when they fire me, you're going to have to support our family with a single income."

"They're not going to fire you. You are a valued resident. Besides, if they fired you, who would I have quickies with in the linen closet? And the supply closet? And the on-call rooms?", he asked jokingly.

"That's true.", Meredith sighed, looking around to make sure people were out of ear-shot of their conversation. "Speaking of…we should have some shower sex tonight. The shower at the trailer is smaller, but I'm flexible, which I know you enjoy."

"Hmm…we haven't done the bendy thing in a while."

"And it's Valentine's Day…", Meredith added, smiling slightly.

"It is", Derek agreed, returning the grin.

"And then more sex in bed…"

"Lots of sex", Derek whispered. He tried to keep his voice down. Once the two of them got on the topic of sex, it usually ended with them actually having sex. But he figured that was probably not appropriate at the Space Needle. Although, it would be memorable.

After they were done with lunch, one of the employees showed them the rooms available for the rehearsal dinner. They settled on the Lake Union Room, the only one with a dance floor, which Derek insisted they needed to have so he and Meredith could dance, something he'd only do with her. The Lake Union Room also had a view of Queen Anne, downtown Seattle, and the Elliott Bay Marina, which had an amazing view of the ferryboats.

After spending an hour or so touring the Space Needle, something neither of them had ever seen before, they did some shopping in town, followed by a quick stop for coffee. They decided to take a walk in the park and take advantage of the sun.

"I love you", Meredith whispered as they walked along with their arms around each other's waists.

Derek kissed her temple. "I love you too."

"So do you like the room we picked?"

"I love it."

"Doesn't the maid of honor usually toast at the rehearsal dinner?", she asked.

"Yeah, I think so", Derek replied.

Meredith laughed. "I can't even imagine what Cristina and Izzie are going to come up with. It'll probably be mortifying."

"Just be grateful that they do that in front of a smaller group of people. Mark has to toast us at the reception…with the guests as his audience", Derek reminded her.

"Crap. You should probably get a copy of that beforehand to censor anything we don't want announced."

"He won't say anything bad about you. But me? I'm not so sure I trust him. He'll be bringing up embarrassing things from our childhood."

Meredith giggled. "I want to hear those stories."

"I don't", Derek laughed. "Knowing Mark, he'll bring up me losing my virginity or something."

"Mark knows that story? Even I don't know that story."

"Believe me…you don't want to hear it", Derek sighed, shaking his head.

"Aww, that bad?", Meredith asked, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Yep", Derek nodded. "That bad."

"Oh come on. Now you have to tell me", Meredith insisted.

"What about you? Are you going to share your story?", he asked with a chuckle.

Meredith shrugged. "My story is boring. Just some drunken mistake my sophomore year of college."

"Was this during your pink hair stage?"

"Nah. The pink hair was gone after high school. I'm pretty sure Dartmouth wouldn't have appreciated it", she giggled. "Anyway, I guess I'll just tell you so then you'll have to tell me yours. I was at a party and some drunk frat guy—Greg was his name—he came up and started talking to me. By this time, I had the bottle of tequila in my hand so my head was all cloudy and everything was kinda porny. Next thing I know, we're in my dorm room and, well, you know the rest…", she said with a sigh.

"You're right, that was kind of boring", Derek laughed.

"I told you." Meredith nudged him with her hip. "Your turn."

"Okay, uh, it was the summer before I started med school—"

"You were a virgin all through college?", she asked, a certain amount of surprise in her voice.

Derek nodded. "I wasn't into the whole drunken party sex thing in college…", he teased.

"Ass", she said with a smirk. "I bet no one wanted to sleep with you."

Derek looked at her in shock and laughed. "Okay, that was low."

"It was. I'm sorry", she giggled.

"I forgive you", he laughed before kissing her cheek. "Would you like me to continue? Or are you just going to keep making fun of me?"

"I'm listening."

"Okay. So I had been dating this girl for a while—Becky. It was the Fourth of July and her parents were having their annual party. We decided to sneak away to the gazebo when it got dark outside to uh…seal the deal…"

"Ooh, I like your story so far", Meredith giggled.

"Oh it gets better...I guess we'd been gone for a while, and her parents got worried so they decided to come looking for us. They recruited others to join in the search, armed with flashlights. Anyway, her parents eventually found us in the throes with Mark by their side. After her mom ran away crying, Mark announced it to the party. Needless to say, I wasn't welcomed back to any more Fourth of July parties…", he sighed.

"Oh Der", Meredith winced. "That's horrible…"

Derek laughed. "Now do you see why I wouldn't want Mark telling that story?"

"Do you really think he'd be able to work that into his toast?"

"I have no doubts", Derek said with a laugh.

"Maybe I'll let him take me lingerie shopping for the wedding night in exchange for keeping anything embarrassing to himself", Meredith joked.

"Oh so he told you about offering to take you shopping for Valentine's Day?", he asked amusedly.

"I still can't believe you declined that offer. Mark and I would have had so much fun at Victoria's Secret…picking out thongs and bras and lacey nightgowns. We could have even stopped off for that chocolate body paint and some glow in the dark condoms", she smirked.

"As sweet as that would have been, I already bought some of that stuff", he said with a grin.

Meredith smiled. "And I may have bought some lingerie…the kind you like…with the tie in the front…"

"Easy access", he whispered into her ear, lightly nipping on her earlobe.

"Mmm", she moaned.

"I think we've had enough porny talk in the park", he chuckled.

"How did we go from wedding toasts to easy access lingerie?", she asked with a giggle.

"It was probably your fault", Derek smirked.

Meredith laughed. "My fault?"

"That's okay. I love our porny conversations." He kissed the top of her head that still rested on his shoulder.

"At least it's Valentine's Day. We get to be a little porny today", she reasoned.

"Are you having a good day so far?", he asked, pulling her closer to him.

"Mhm", she murmured, just enjoying the feel of his warm body close to his. She hadn't really ever celebrated Valentine's Day before, but so far, it was exceeding her expectations.

"So I have another gift for you", he told her while reaching into his coat pocket.

Meredith lifted her head from his shoulder. "Here?"

"Yeah", he nodded, pulling the item from his pocket. "I don't want you to think this is in any way a replacement for him, but I got you this…", he said softly, handing her a dog collar.

"Wait, why?", she asked, looking up at him confusedly.

"I know we both loved Doc, and that we still miss him, but I was thinking that one day, we could get a dog", he said with a small smile. He really didn't want her to think this gift was meant to replace Doc. He just knew that she loved dogs, and that it could be nice for them to get another one in the future.

"Like, a family dog?", she asked, playing with the collar in between her fingers.

Derek's smile grew wider. "Yeah. A dog for our family."

"I'd love that", she whispered, leaning in to kiss him softly.

"I love you", he murmured against her lips.

After they broke the kiss, Meredith looked up at him with tears in her eyes and smiled. "I love you too."

"So you're really okay with it?"

"I am. I always wanted a dog when I was little, but my mom would never have gone for that. So ever since I was little, I swore to myself that by some slim chance I ever had kids, they'd have a dog", she admitted quietly. "Doc will always be my first baby though", she said with a soft smile.

"He was a good dog." Derek smiled and wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"He was", Meredith whispered, her sadness melting away when she thought of how Doc had given them a reason to be together, even if it was just taking him for a walk in the morning before work.

"We'll get the best dog out there—one that's protective—and good with little kids…although we'll probably have to find a new vet…"

"Are you seriously bringing up my ex-whatever on Valentine's Day?"

"Is that tacky?", he laughed.

"A little", she smirked.

"I'm just saying…" Derek threw up his hands in defense. "We really can't go back there. That could be…"

"Awkward", Meredith stated with a definitive nod. "Very awkward."

"But then again…you could flash him the ring—make him jealous", he grinned.

"Is that how you see me? As a trophy?", she asked playfully, knowing he was only joking.

"Of course not." He shook his head. "But in any case…I won."

"I guess you did", she laughed, tilting her head up to kiss him.

"I love you, Mer", he smiled. "And we have time to find a vet. We still need to get a dog before worrying about any of that."

"And we can walk him on the land together", Meredith added.

"Speaking of that, I have another gift for you back there", he told her with a smile.

"Hmm…okay. Wanna head back?"

"Sure", Derek agreed.

After they took a cab back to the ferry dock to retrieve Derek's car, they drove back to their land where they would be spending Valentine's night.

**There's still one more Valentine's Day chapter before I add some more drama to this fic. By the way, are people still interested in this story? I just want to make sure. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	22. Valentine's Day Pt 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. I just wish I did.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! I really appreciate all of them.**

"Wait…why are we going to the house?", Meredith asked as Derek took her hand and starting walking toward the cliff.

"Because. I still have a few surprises for you, Dr. Grey", he grinned.

After they took the short walk to the location of the house, Derek led her to the front door.

"What are you doing?"

"Giving you this…", he replied, pulling a key out of his pocket.

"You…it's…we really have a house key?", she asked quietly.

Derek nodded. "We do."

"Der", Meredith whispered, tears pooling in her eyes.

"I love you, Meredith." He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a warm embrace.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. "I love you too."

"Try it out", Derek grinned as they pulled back.

"Okay", Meredith said with a smile. Derek had already given her more than she expected, but she was never expecting a key to their house. It was a simple gift, but to them, it was so much more than a key. To them, it was their future. It was the key to the house they would come home to after a long day at work. A place where they would raise their family and live out their forever together.

Meredith inserted the key in the door and turned it to the left, hearing the click as the door unlocked.

"Can we…?"

"Yeah", Derek nodded as she turned the brass doorknob and slowly opened the door. Some lighting had recently been installed, and the house was cast in a warm glow of yellow light.

"Derek…this is beautiful", she whispered, tightening her grip on his hand.

Derek smiled, tugging on her hand a little. "Come on…"

"Where?"

"Here", he said softly, leading them to the playroom.

"Why are we—", she started before gasping. "Derek."

They stood in the playroom, which had been decorated with several of their childhood pictures on the wall. "You put the pictures up", she whimpered, tears already making their way down her face.

"Yeah", he said, a small smile on his face. "You okay?"

"Yeah", she whispered. "I just…we're in our dream house and you hung up the baby pictures because our kids are going to play in here and…all of this…it's real."

"It's real", he repeated, putting his hands in his coat pockets as she walked around to admire each of the framed photos adorning their wall.

"You put up all the ones we wanted, even the one of your naked little hiney", she giggled through her tears. "I can't even believe…thank you, Derek."

"You're welcome." Derek walked over to her and wrapped his arm around her waist. "I think I got all of them…"

"You did", Meredith said with a smile, wiping some of the tears off her face.

"We can still paint the walls in here, obviously, but I knew this was something you'd probably like", he explained.

Meredith turned her head to face him. "I love it", she said softly, standing on her tiptoes to kiss him. During her childhood, Meredith always wanted Ellis to hang pictures on the wall, but Ellis either didn't want to or simply didn't have the time. So Meredith always promised herself that if she were to have a family of her own one day, there would be pictures everywhere. And for Derek to do something like this for her was better than any gift she'd ever gotten.

"Did you want to come into the kitchen for a minute? I have something else to show you…"

"Seriously?", she giggled. "Because I don't think anything can top this."

Derek wiped the remainder of her tears away with the pad of his thumb. "I think you might like this too", he chuckled. He took her hand and led her into the kitchen toward the island that had been installed. "This is for you", he said, gesturing to the wrapped present that lay on top of it.

"Okay", she whispered, picking up the slightly heavy, slightly square shaped gift. She slowly peeled back the red wrapping paper that revealed what was inside. "Oh my God. Derek."

In her hands, Meredith held a shiny golden plaque with the words "The Shepherds" written across it, something they could display on the front door of their new home. A home that belonged to Meredith and Derek.

"I was going to get a mailbox with our name on it instead, but then I realized we're living in the middle of nowhere and we probably won't have a mail carrier", he said with a laugh. Honestly, he didn't even think about mail being an issue until Mark asked him about it. But that wasn't important right now. He knew they'd work something out. What mattered right now was Meredith and how genuinely happy she looked admiring the gift.

"I love it, Derek", she whispered, running her fingers over the cool metal of the plaque.

"Yeah?"

Meredith looked at him and smiled, her eyes once again glistening with a fresh sheen of tears. "Yeah. I just…Meredith Shepherd", she said almost to herself. "It sounds…"

"Beautiful", Derek said softly, kissing her temple. "I know you want to be Meredith Grey Shepherd at the hospital, but outside of work, you wanted to use Shepherd, so I thought this would be something special for us to have for our new home."

"Our home…", Meredith repeated, still slightly in awe over the gift.

"Which brings me to the next thing", he began, causing Meredith to look up from the plaque and into his eyes, a confused expression on her face. Derek opened one of the wooden drawers of the island and pulled out a piece of paper. "This…"

"What is…? The deed to the land?", Meredith asked, reading over the paper.

"Yeah", Derek said softly. "This land had always belonged to both of us. Since the night I met you, this land has been yours just as much as it was mine. When I moved out here, I had no idea what I wanted to do with all of it. The first time we came out here together, I just…I knew I wanted to build a home for the two of us. And almost two years later, here we are. In our home. And I know it's been one hell of a road to get to this point, but we did. We made it. And I wanted to make it official by having you sign your name to the deed, making everything legally belong to both of us."

A few tears escaped from her tear-filled green eyes. "Yeah", she quickly whispered, without any hesitation. She wanted this. She was in this. It may have been a piece of paper, but to her, it was just further affirmation of their commitment. Their faith. Their love. Meredith pulled a pen out of her tote bag and smoothed the paper on the surface before signing it as neatly as she could manage, her hands still shaking slightly. After she finished, she put the pen down and looked up at him, a contented, genuine smile on her face. "Thank you, Derek."

Derek nodded slightly before leaning in to kiss her softly. "I love you. I love you so much", he murmured against her lips.

"I love you, too", she answered, running her fingers through his hair.

After they broke this kiss, Derek rested his forehead against hers. "Did you want to go back to the trailer? I'm going to make dinner", he whispered, hold her close to him.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah", he answered softly, kissing her forehead. Meredith picked up the plaque and the paper and hugged them close to her chest. Derek wrapped his arm around her and together they left their home, making sure to lock the door with their very own key. Meredith wrapped the key in her hand, holding it securely and together, the two of them made their way back to the trailer.

"I would have made us dinner at the house, but we don't have a stove yet", he chuckled.

She giggled. "That's okay."

"I'll go get your overnight bag from the car. Why don't you go inside…", he offered, handing her the key to the trailer.

"Okay", she nodded, taking the key as the two split off in different directions. When Meredith opened the door, she was once again taken by surprise. There were framed three by five photos of them arranged around the trailer.

When Meredith had moved back to Seattle, she had found an unused disposable camera while unpacking boxes from her apartment back in Boston. She tossed it in her nightstand and forgot about it until one day, Derek found it. Meredith had asked him to check inside and make sure there were enough condoms. He pulled out the camera, and snapped a photo of her. And that's how they spent their day off. Taking pictures of each other.

Meredith had forgotten all about that day until now. So much had happened since then, from secret wives to getting engaged. And apparently, Derek had held onto the camera the entire time. "Wow", Meredith murmured to herself as she walked around the trailer. There were individual pictures of them, as well as both of them together. In some, they were kissing; in others, they were making funny faces. Yet another round of tears made their way to her eyes, and still, she couldn't wipe the smile off her face.

"Hey you", Derek said quietly as he entered the trailer with her white tote bag full of her clothes and toiletries.

Meredith turned around to face him. "Derek. I…how did you…?"

"Do you know how long I've had that camera?", he asked with a chuckle, coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

"I forgot all about that day", she admitted, leaning her head back against his cheek.

Derek kissed the side of her head. "That was a fun day."

"Yeah", Meredith agreed with a smile. "It was."

"You're probably the best fiancé ever", she giggled. "This day…goes beyond anything I expected."

"And this is only our first Valentine's Day together. They're only going to get better", he grinned, kissing her neck.

"Mmm…what about when we have toddlers running around? Is it still going to be romantic?", she asked.

"Of course. We can do the family thing during the day. And we can ship them off to Aunt Cristina's for the night", he joked.

"Yeah. I'm sure she'd love that", she said sarcastically.

"Fine. Well send them over to your house. Someone's bound to be there to babysit", he joked.

"Deal", she giggled, turning her head to kiss him.

"I love you, Meredith", he said softly, spinning her around to face him.

"I love you, too." She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest. "You are going to get very lucky tonight."

"Oh, am I?", he asked with a grin, running his hands up and down her arms.

"Well, after everything you've done today, I think you deserve it."

"Hmm…you're probably right", he said cockily.

"Ass", Meredith giggled. "So are you gonna feed me soon?"

"Sure. Why don't you go change into some pajamas and I'll start cooking", he offered as they pulled back from their embrace.

"I didn't bring pajamas. Only my lingerie…"

"You could just walk around naked. I wouldn't mind", he suggested, a sly grin on his face.

"Hmm…maybe I'll just borrow some of your sweats", she teased as she made her way to his bedroom.

Derek began taking out the various items for their dinner. "Fine. There's always time for the lingerie later…the night is far from over. We still have to have our shower sex", he reminded her.

"I don't know…", she said, yawning dramatically as she finished changing. "I'm kinda beat." She plopped down onto the bed and lay back on the pillows.

"Oh no you don't", he laughed, walking over and jumping on the bed, pinning her down and tickling her.

"Fine! Stop! I was just kidding!", she squealed between her giggles. "We can have sex!"

"Yeah?", he asked as he continued to tickle her.

Meredith squirmed and laughed beneath him. "Yes!"

"Okay", he chuckled, ceasing his tickling assault.

"You're such an ass", she giggled, attempting to catch her breath.

Derek brushed some wispy strands of hair off her face. "You love me."

"I don't know why", she joked, arching her back to readjust the tee shirt she had borrowed from him.

"Because you, Meredith Grey, are the love of my life", he said with a smile.

"I know", she whispered, running her fingers through his hair.

"I love you, Mer." He leaned down and kissed her softly.

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "I love you, too." They enjoyed a few moments of comfortable silence before Meredith's stomach made a gurgling sound.

"Hungry?", Derek chuckled.

"A little", she said, rubbing her stomach.

Derek rolled off of her and helped her sit up in the bed. "Well, let's feed you then."

"Hmm…this is why I keep you around", she grinned. Derek took her hand and they walked into the small kitchen area.

"I bought wine, but I don't think I have any wine glasses…", Derek said, rummaging through various cabinets.

Meredith smirked. "Have you forgotten who I am? The girl who drinks tequila straight from the bottle. We don't need wine glasses." She took the bottle and the corkscrew from the counter and after a few attempts, finally succeeded in opening it.

Derek watched amusedly as she put the bottle of wine to her lips and took a sip. "That…is one of the many reasons why I love you", he chuckled.

"Because I'm a trashy wine drinker?", she giggled, handing the bottle to him so he could take a sip.

Derek accepted the bottle. "Exactly."

"You're not marrying a New York socialite. You're marrying a trashy girl from Seattle", she grinned.

"You're not trashy", he laughed, taking a sip of the expensive wine he had bought just for the occasion.

Meredith smiled. "Aw, you're sweet."

"I'm serious. You're anything but trashy", he said, pulling her in for a kiss.

"Even though I'm standing here in your pajamas drinking wine from a bottle?", she joked.

"Especially because of that", he said softly. "You always look beautiful."

A slight blush spread across Meredith's cheeks. "I love you."

"I love you too", he smiled, kissing her again.

Together, they made their Valentine's Day dinner. After eating, they fulfilled their promise of shower sex, followed by a marathon night of sex in bed complete with Meredith's easy access lingerie, glow in the dark condoms, and the chocolate body paint they had for the occasion.

It was almost sunrise by the time they had finished their last round of love making for the night, and both were completely exhausted. They were sweaty and still slightly sticky from the chocolate, but neither wanted to move. Derek had recently drifted off to sleep and Meredith lay contentedly snuggled in his arms, the blanket softly draped over their naked bodies.

She loved that even though he was sleeping, he instinctually kept his arm wrapped around her, keeping her safe and warm. Her breathing had evened out as she listened to his steady heart beat, her face cuddled into his bare chest. She lifted her chin up and kissed his cheek, smiling softly.

It was certainly the most memorable Valentine's Day Meredith had ever had. She had never been the type of girl who was into that sort of thing. Up until she met Derek, Valentine's Day was just another reminder that maybe she wasn't going to find the knight in shining whatever who was going to sweep her off her feet. And yet, despite her pessimism for all things Prince Charming, she found him. And he never ceased to take her breath away.

**Hope you liked their Valentine's Day. I wanted to make it special for them.**

**Reviews make my day. And give me a lot of motivation. **


	23. Healing

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.**

Meredith had had a roller coaster of a day. She had been on-call the night before, while Derek had been at home sleeping in her bed. He offered to stay with her of course, but he had a big surgery the following afternoon, so she wanted him to be well rested. And sleeping in an on-call room bed ensured just the opposite. She had grown accustomed to sleeping in Derek's arms, so she had tossed and turned all night, wishing she was snuggled in her big, warm bed with him.

Her only case of the day had been a c-section with the new neonatal attending, aka, Mark's "flavor of the week", as she had been so kindly nicknamed by Cristina. Her patient was an expectant mother who had been trying to have a baby with her husband for a few years. Because she had suffered from pregnancy complications throughout the nine months, they opted for a c-section.

However, what should have been a routine surgery turned into unexpected trouble when the mother coded on the table from excessive blood loss. They tried reviving her for almost an hour, but despite their efforts, she died anyway, leaving her husband and baby daughter without a mother.

Meredith managed to keep it together in the OR, but as soon as she went to change her blood soaked scrubs in the safety of the resident lounge, she broke down and had a panic attack. Derek was in the middle of a long and complicated surgery, so she couldn't page him to calm her down. After several long minutes, her breathing evened out and she managed to relax a bit. However, her mind kept racing and her heart broke as she thought about the happy family that should be celebrating right now. Instead, the new grief-stricken father had to plan a funeral for his wife. It wasn't fair. Life had played a cruel joke. And Meredith found herself crying for them.

She knew that things like this shouldn't bother her. Generally, she distanced herself as surgeons are supposed to. But a case like this hit home. Meredith knew what it was like to grow up essentially "motherless." And no one deserved that. She almost felt guilty that she had a mother, no matter how absent she was in her life. But the new baby would never know hers. And despite all of Meredith's surgical skills, that was something that couldn't be fixed with medicine.

Despite how blessed and lucky Meredith felt in finding love, friendships, and success, there has always been somewhat of a void in her life—the missing link of a mother-daughter relationship with Ellis. Everyone should know that sort of bond. And Meredith always promised herself that if she ever had children, they would know her love for them.

And now, standing under the hot water of her shower, she couldn't help herself. The dam burst. Something about this case had touched her, and she just had to cry. She had never really thought about her mother's death. In a way, Ellis's death had come as a relief to her, but now, she was really starting to accept it. Putting her mother to rest in the scrub room of the hospital certainly helped her deal with the sadness, but maybe the reality of it all was finally hitting her. So she cried. Cried over the family that was left without a mother. Cried over the death of her own mother. Cried over the cruelty of the world. Just…cried.

She heard a slight knock on the door. "Mer", a soft voice called as Derek stepped inside the bathroom. They both had worked long days. Meredith hadn't arrived home until 10:30, and Derek had just gotten home around eleven. And both were completely exhausted.

"Yeah?", was all she could manage to say through her tears and stuffy nose.

"You okay?", he asked, noticing the upset tone of her voice, even over the noisy stream of water hitting the floor of the shower.

"Yeah. I'll be out in a minute", she answered. She quickly rinsed her hair of her lavender conditioner, the scent slightly relaxing her.

She turned off the knobs and grabbed the towel from the handle on the opposite side of the frosted glass door and wrapped it around her body. Derek was waiting for her in her room, changing into some pajamas.

"Hey", she said softly, mustering her best fake smile. She walked over to her dresser and pulled some pajamas from the drawer. Meredith dropped her towel, exposing all of her naked glory. Usually she would flash Derek a coy smile, daring him to watch her get dressed. But not tonight. Derek could tell just by looking at her demeanor that something was bothering her.

"You okay? You seem…not okay", he began, hoping she'd reveal something about what had her so upset.

Meredith sniffled and nodded as she went into her private bathroom to brush her teeth. When she returned several minutes later, she simply crawled into bed and buried her face in his chest.

"Meredith, please talk to me", he whispered, kissing the top of her damp head.

Meredith lifted her head and looked at him, his blue eyes full of concern for her. That was all it took. "Bad day", she confessed, her voice barely audible.

"Yeah?", he asked softly, relieved that she was willing to talk to him and hopefully get whatever was bothering her off her chest.

"It's just…today I was on OB. This couple…they wanted a baby for a long time. And during the c-section, the mom coded…and she just…died", she admitted, tears once again returning to her already puffy eyes.

Derek sat them up a bit in the bed and pulled her close to him. "I'm so sorry, Meredith", he said gently.

"Things like this aren't supposed to bother me. They shouldn't but…it's just so unfair…" Derek just nodded and waited for her to continue. "They're supposed to be happy. They're supposed to be a family. But that baby is never going to know her mom…", she trailed off, crying softly.

"Meredith, I'm so sorry…"

"She's a beautiful baby, Derek. She's beautiful…and she has these big blue eyes and…I…I had to cut the cord because the father was panicking, telling his wife to wake up. And I just…why Derek? Why do things like that have to happen? It's not fair", she cried, burying her face in his shoulder.

"I know. It's not fair, Meredith", he said, gently rocking her back and forth in his arms. "It's okay to be upset. What happened…it's horrible. Things like that shouldn't happen. But you had no control over it…"

"Afterward, I was on edge. I couldn't even think. And when I went to the nursery to check on the baby, her little name card was still blank. There was no family around to see her. So I went in and I just…I picked her up, and then I just sat with her in the rocking chair for over an hour. She's beautiful, Derek. She was an hour old, and her world was already turned upside down. It's not fair", she said, reaching for his hand and lacing her fingers with his. "And I thought…what if that happened to us?", she sniffled, tears falling down her face.

"Mer, that won't happen. I promise", he assured her, rubbing her hand with his thumb.

"If something were to happen to me, and you had to raise our baby by yourself", she whimpered. "I know what it's like not to have a mother in your life. I mean, I had one, but she was never there. And I always wanted her to be…and I just…I don't know. I shouldn't think like that but I couldn't help it…"

Derek's heart ached for her. He never realized how much he took his own loving family for granted until he met Meredith. She came from a broken home with a negligent mother and no father. He knew that she couldn't help but think about such things. Her whole life, she had been building up walls to protect herself from heartbreak, and now that she felt comfortable enough to allow herself to be vulnerable, she couldn't help but express her pain.

"I know", he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head.

"Derek…"

"Hmm?"

Meredith let out a deep breath. She had to tell him. It would be painful, but she knew she had to do it. "My mother took a scalpel and slit her wrists in front of me when I was five years old."

"Meredith", he whispered, a look of pain written all over his features. "I…I had no idea."

"And I had to sit…on the kitchen floor in a pool of her blood, waiting for her to pass out before I could even get help", she cried.

"Mer..." He reached over and grabbed the tissue box off of her nightstand.

"Thanks", she said, taking one and wiping her nose with it.

"Why couldn't you get her help?", he asked softly. Derek knew this was a difficult conversation for her, but he also knew that she had to get all of this out into the open.

"She told me not to. I knew I'd get in trouble if I did", she admitted sadly, the painful memories all flooding back into her mind.

"Oh, Meredith", he breathed. "I am so sorry."

"It took me years to realize that it wasn't a suicide attempt. If she wanted to kill herself, she would have known how to do it. But I can't help but get angry at her…at Richard…at Thatcher…they were the adults. I was five, Derek. I had no control over anything. I was the one who suffered. That day…we were in the kitchen and she just…she told me to be extraordinary. That's the last things she said before she… then she just pulled out the scalpel and…" Her breath caught in her throat, causing her to cough through her tears.

"There was so much blood, Derek. After she passed out, I got the phone and called 911. I tried to drag her by the front door so they could get to her quicker, but she was too heavy, so I…I got a towel and started wiping up the blood. I covered up her wrists. I thought that maybe that would make the bleeding stop. I remember kneeling on the kitchen floor shaking and crying while I scrubbed. I had most of it cleaned up by the time the EMTs got to the house."

She paused to wipe some tears off her face with the tissue. So many had already seeped into Derek's gray tee shirt, but he didn't take any notice. He wished he could take all of the pain away. He never wanted her to hurt, but he also knew that this was good. She had obviously been keeping this inside her whole life, and telling him would make her feel better. Maybe now, she could begin to heal.

"Meredith, I am so sorry. I can't even imagine…five years old…", he whispered in shock. Part of him was grieving for Meredith, the person he loved more than anything or anyone else in the world. And the other part of him was angry at Ellis for putting her five year old daughter through such emotional trauma.

"That little baby will never know her mom. As I was sitting there holding her, I remembered everything I felt while I was cleaning up all the blood. My mom raised me to not believe in anything, but I remember asking God to keep her alive. I asked God to keep her heart beating." She paused and took a breath. "Today in the nursery, I said a prayer. I said a prayer for the baby. I asked God to make sure she had a good life, and that people would tell her just how much her mom loved her. And that even though her mom wasn't around, she could feel that love."

In that moment, Derek felt his pained heart swell with love for her. Even though she was going through her own personal pain, she always thought of others. She was kind and thoughtful, something she surely didn't inherit from her mother, who had done something incredibly selfish, leaving her only daughter with a lifetime of pain that was only now beginning to heal.

"Mer, it's okay", he soothed, wiping some hair off of her tear stained face and kissing her forehead.

"No. It's not", she whispered. "I _had_ a mother. I had a mother who didn't necessarily _want_ to die, but would have accepted it if it happened. And she didn't stop to think how that would have affected me. What would have happened to me if she had died on the kitchen floor? Where would I have gone? My 

father didn't want me. My mother…wanted Richard. And I just…I wanted a family", she cried softly. "And that baby—"

"Has a family", he finished for her. "Meredith, she has a family. I'm sure her father loves her more than she'll ever be able to comprehend. He probably just needed some time…time to grieve. But Meredith, they have each other. He gets to watch his daughter grow up. And her mom—she gets to live on through her daughter. Right now, things look hopeless, I know. But they'll cope. They'll learn to live…"

"Yeah", she whimpered, nodding slightly. She laid her head on his shoulder and breathed in his comforting scent. Together they sat in silence for a while. Derek gently rubbed her back and kissed her head repeatedly while she cried softly, letting out all of the emotions she had been holding back her whole life.

Eventually, she lifted her head and looked into his blue eyes. "I'm okay", she sniffled.

Derek smiled softly. "You're okay", he repeated, wiping some hair off her face.

"I love you", she whispered.

"I love you too, Meredith." He kissed her cheek, tasting the slight saltiness of her tears on his lips.

Meredith exhaled a deep breath and nodded slightly to herself. "I have…we have to do something", she said quietly, tugging on her bottom lip with her teeth.

"Hmm?", he asked.

"I, um…I saved some ashes…from the baggie. I don't even know why I did it, but I did. And I…want to sprinkle the rest of them in the backyard of our house…so she can be a part of our lives. I want her to know that I was able to do it. That I could be both. I want her to know that even after everything, I really do love her…that I learned through her mistakes."

Derek just smiled and kissed her forehead. He loved that she had suggested doing something so meaningful in memory of her mother. He couldn't even find the words to express how proud he was of her.

"Sorry, I um…that was probably corny and I—"

"Meredith", he said softly, stopping her nervous rambling. "I would love to."

Meredith smiled slightly. "Yeah?"

"Absolutely", he nodded and smiled confidently.

"Okay", she answered quietly. She kissed his cheek and laid her head on his chest contentedly.

Derek scooted backward in the bed and proceeded to lie down, making it more comfortable for both of them. He began rubbing her back and she sighed softly.

"I'm sorry", she whispered, tracing the logo on his Clash tee shirt with her finger.

Derek looked at her with a worried expression. "Sorry? For what?"

"For being a train wreck full of issues…", she sighed, letting out a breath.

"First of all, you are not a train wreck full of issues. And second, you never have to apologize. It's okay to cry…to get upset. I will always be here to love you and support you. If anything is ever bothering you, you can talk to me. I promise, we'll always get through it", he said softly, kissing the top of her head.

"I've never told anyone about my mother before. No one else knows", she confessed.

"Why did you tell me?"

Meredith sniffled slightly. "I just thought you should know. I wanted you to know. I probably should have told you before. It's just…"

"It's okay. I understand. It's painful to talk about something like that…", he said sympathetically.

"I was always going to tell you. It's just…not easy to work that into a conversation."

Derek squeezed her gently in his embrace. "I know", he whispered. "Let's just sleep, okay?"

"I love you", she said with a soft smile, leaning up to kiss his cheek.

"I love you, too", he said, returning the smile. He pulled the blanket up over both of them and she snuggled against him, her head still resting on his chest. Within minutes, he heard the faint snores coming from her small body. Today had certainly worn her out, both physically and emotionally. His heart ached with sadness for her, and yet he admired her for her bravery and strength. Keeping something like that to herself for so many years could not have been easy for her. And he was glad that she told him, no matter how painful. He knew a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

She had told him about the unofficial funeral of depositing Ellis's ashes in the scrub room at Seattle Grace with Richard, but he didn't know she had saved some of her mother's remains. Spreading the rest of the ashes on their land was a beautiful idea, and once again, he was taken aback by Meredith's gracious gesture of making peace once and for all with her dead mother.

Derek lazily ran his fingers through Meredith's long honey blonde hair strewn across her shoulders. Her eyelashes were still damp with tears as she slept peacefully, the heartache of the day diminishing as she dreamt. He wished he could make it all better. He wished that when she woke up, all of the pain would vanish. No one should ever have to go through something like that, especially an innocent five year old girl. A girl with traumatic memories that stayed with her through to adulthood. A girl whose father had seemingly disappeared forever with no explanation. A girl whose mother never wanted her, who tells her she was a mistake, a burden, ordinary. He was determined to make sure she never felt that way ever again. He would spend a lifetime proving to her that she was indeed extraordinary.

--

The following weekend, when they had a day off, they drove out to the land to spread the remainder of the ashes. Meredith kept the bag in her safe grip as they made the short walk to the location of the house.

"The backyard, right?", Derek asked softly as he held her hand.

"Hmm? Oh. Yeah", Meredith answered, snapping out of her thoughts.

Derek kissed her cheek. "You okay?"

"Yeah. I am", she assured him with a small smile. She had to do this. She knew this would bring her peace.

They made their way into the backyard, where a white picket fence was in the process of being built. Meredith had once sworn to herself that she wouldn't let her one night stands lead to a future of white picket fences or kids, but in the case of Meredith and Derek, it did. She found herself laughing softly at the irony.

"Here's good", she said quietly. They stood in the middle of the backyard facing their home.

"Okay", Derek said with a smile, giving her hand a gentle squeeze before letting go so she could open the bag full of mommy. There wasn't much left, but enough so they could each have a handful.

Meredith scooped some into her cupped hands and looked at Derek, nodding slightly. Derek took that as his cue and reached into the bag to collect some of the ash and dust. "Did you want to say anything?", he asked gently.

"I um…I'm not very good at this, but…", she took a deep breath. "I forgive you, mom. I have to. I can't…keep grudges or be angry. I have to let go. And I know that we never found common ground while you were alive, but I like to think we've made peace." Meredith could feel the tears falling down her cheeks. Derek, too, found his own eyes stinging with tears.

"You taught me a lot, mom. You taught me to be strong…to be independent. But I did something you never taught me to do. Something I did for myself. I found extraordinary love, mom. I found Derek. He loves me. And I love him. I love him more than anything else in the world. And I just…I wanted you to know that. I want you to know that I'm okay. I'm happy…and I'm loved." Meredith wiped a few tears off with the shoulder of her coat, her hands still holding her mother's remains.

"And I know you felt most at home in the OR, but I thought that you could also feel at home here…in our home. I want you to be a part of our lives. I want you to know your grandchildren. Because they'll know who you were. You'll always be a part of our family, mom. I know you didn't believe in anything, but I like to think you're always here, watching over us. You did your best, mom. And I'm going to do my best, too. I'm going to be the best wife and mother I can be. I'm proud of myself, mom. And I hope you're proud of me too." Meredith took a deep breath before spreading her fingers apart slightly, letting some of the ashes fall to the soft green grass at their feet. "I love you, mommy", she whispered.

Despite the tears blurring his vision, Derek managed to follow her lead, some of the ashes mixing with hers in the wind and blowing across the expanse of their backyard. "She loves you, too."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "I know", she said softly, tears still rolling down her face.

After they had sprinkled the rest of Ellis's ashes, Meredith closed her eyes and breathed in and out for a few moments, perhaps in a silent prayer. Derek stood beside her in silence, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her close to him.

Maybe everything Meredith had gone through had happened for a reason. Or maybe life had played a cruel joke on her. Whatever the reason, it made her the person she is today. Loving, brilliant, determined, compassionate, strong.

Extraordinary.

She wouldn't let her mother's past determine her own future. She was healing, and Derek would be with her every step of the way.

**The idea of spreading Ellis's ashes was borrowed with permission from **_**GreysAddict522**_**, so she gets all of the credit. Thanks again!**

**Reviews mean the world to me.**


	24. Playing House

**Disclaimer: I wish.**

A few weeks had passed since spreading the remainder of Ellis's ashes on the land of their backyard, and Meredith found herself finally at peace with her dead mother. They were also a few weeks closer to the wedding. Thankfully, they were having a small wedding as well as reception on their land, which took a lot of stress out of wedding planning, and more time for the two of them to spend together.

For the next four days, they would be spending some well deserved quality time with each other. The hospital had been exhausting them lately. Both Meredith and Derek had scrubbed in for more surgeries last week than they could count. Apparently spring time brought in almost as many surgical cases as the holiday season did. So they considered this a spring break of sorts. It was a time set aside every year for some of the Seattle Grace surgeons to attend conferences and seminars held all over the country. Back in New York, Derek had always attended these events, but he opted to refrain from doing so this year. He wanted to spend the rare four day holiday with Meredith.

Only they wouldn't be alone for the entirety of their little vacation. They would be spending a full two days babysitting Meredith's niece, who would soon be Derek's niece too. Lexie was taking advantage of her four day vacation by going to Spokane with Molly and Eric. When Meredith found out, she eagerly volunteered her and Derek to babysit the ten month old little girl. They enjoyed spending the day with her the last time, and were excited to watch her again. The three of them would be dropping her off soon, and would pick her up on Saturday morning, which meant Laura would be spending three nights with them. Derek and Meredith would still get to spend all of Saturday and Sunday together.

"Der!", Meredith called from Izzie's bedroom. Izzie was nice enough to offer up her room for the baby while she shared her room with Alex.

She heard him making his way up the stairs. "Yeah?", he said as he entered the room.

"I can't get this damn portable crib to open", she said, clearly frustrated with the thing. After their shift for the day was over, Meredith got all of the things they would need to babysit from Lexie's car, and together, she and Derek had transported them back to her house.

Derek got down on his knees next to her and easily unfolded the little white crib. He looked over at her and smirked.

"Don't", she pointed at him, wiping some hair off her face.

"I didn't say anything", Derek said amusedly, throwing his hands up in defense.

Meredith glared at him. "You were going to…"

"I was not", he laughed, kissing her cheek.

"Ass", she whispered.

"You can't use that language when the baby gets here", he reminded her as they moved the crib next to Izzie's bed.

"I wouldn't say that in front of the baby", she sighed, rolling her eyes at him. "Just so you know, we're not having sex while she's here either. These legs are closed to you."

"Why?"

"Because. We're…loud. And that could be traumatizing for a baby to hear", she explained as they put the little pink blanket on top of the matching sheet.

"You, my dear, are the loud one", he grinned.

Meredith giggled. "I know I am. But you can get pretty loud yourself."

"What's going to happen when we have kids? Are we going to go to a hotel every time we want to have sex?", he asked jokingly.

"They're going to have to learn to live with the fact that mommy and daddy are loud", she shrugged.

Derek cringed. "That's…slightly disturbing."

"Fine. We'll just have to take it down a notch or two when there's kids down the hall", she reasoned, a slight smile tugging in the corners of her mouth.

"Deal", he grinned, pulling her up against him and kissing her.

"Ready to play parents?", she grinned.

Derek smiled genuinely. "Looking forward to it."

"Me too", she agreed. "This'll be good practice…help us decide if we're cut out for this whole having kids thing."

"You and I are going to be great parents one day", he said softly, kissing her forehead.

Meredith rested her head against his chest. "Hmm…you think so?"

"Absolutely", he said with a nod.

"Love you", she yawned.

"I love you, too." He tilted her chin up and kissed her softly. When their lips parted, Meredith let out another yawn. "You're not going to fall asleep and leave me hanging, are you?"

"No", she yawned again. "I'm just a little tired. Low blood sugar. I haven't eaten yet today."

"Mer, its six o'clock", Derek said in shock. "Why didn't you eat anything?"

"I was in surgery all day. And then we had to come home and set up everything for the baby", she told him as they walked into their bedroom to make sure the baby monitors were working.

"Why don't you go eat something? We're all set up now."

Meredith shrugged. "We can eat once the baby gets here."

"We can play house", he teased, brushing her hair back with his fingers before kissing her.

"Mmm…", Meredith moaned against his lips. "Sounds like a plan."

"Hmm…when are they getting here?"

Meredith wrapped her legs around his waist. "Soon", she murmured against his lips.

"Do we have time to...?", he asked. He eased her back onto the bed and proceeded to suck on her neck, knowing all of her sensitive spots that made her moan.

"Yeah", she breathed, spreading her legs apart slightly so he could lie between them.

"Good. Because I wasn't going to stop", he teased. His hot breath fanning against her neck caused her skin to erupt into goose bumps.

"I didn't think you were…", she giggled. Thanks to their frequent on-call room quickies, they were used to having rushed sex. It just made the slow, intimate love making all the better. But right now, they had to make it fast. And that was fine by both of them.

--

"Okay, that wasn't as fast as it could have been", Meredith said as she attempted to fix her sex hair and zip her jeans at the same time.

Derek laughed. "But it was worth it."

"Of course it was", she giggled, tossing him his shirt.

"Thanks." Derek caught the shirt and quickly pulled it over his head. "It certainly made up for the next three nights."

"It was some very good sex…", she whispered, kissing him softly.

"There's no such thing as bad sex between the two of us…", he grinned, rubbing her back with his hands.

Meredith smirked. "Are you trying to take advantage of me again?"

"How much time do we have?", he teased.

"Not enough", she yawned again. Her post coital mind coupled with her empty stomach certainly didn't help with the exhaustion of working all day.

"You need to go eat something", Derek chuckled as they walked out of the room.

"I think they're here", Meredith said, glancing out the window after they descended the stairs. They opened the front door and waited for the four of them to enter the house. Once inside, they chatted for a few minutes about the baby, and what she would and wouldn't eat, some tricks to get her to sleep, or what to do if she got fussy. By the time Lexie, Molly, and Eric left, both Meredith and Derek felt confident that they could handle three days with Laura.

Until they pulled out of the driveway and Laura began crying. "Ma", she whimpered, clinging to Meredith's shirt with her little fists.

"Mommy will be back, I promise", Meredith soothed, rubbing the tiny baby's back. She may have been ten months old, but she was still small for her age, much like Meredith was when she was a baby. However, despite Meredith's attempts at trying to calm the baby down, Laura continued to wail. "Da…", she cried, struggling to be set free of Meredith's arms.

"Here", Derek said softly, reaching for the upset baby. Meredith handed Laura to him and he held her against him so that she was looking over his shoulder. He bounced her up and down slightly and patted her back.

Meredith swore her heart fluttered at how calm and gentle Derek was with the baby. She stood there in amazement at how quickly Laura relaxed into his arms. She laid her head on his shoulder and whimpered softly, her tiny thumb finding its way to her mouth.

"It's okay. Uncle Derek has you", he whispered, kissing the top of Laura's head. Meredith couldn't fight the smile that tugged on the corners of her mouth. She didn't think it was possible to love him any more than she did, but she found that seeing him with a baby had that effect on her.

"You were here before, remember? That wasn't so bad, was it?", Derek asked in a soft voice. "You such a big girl now, aren't you? Yes you are. The three of us are gonna have fun while you're visiting. Aunt Meredith said that she and I can't have our fun though. Isn't she mean?", he teased, glancing to Meredith.

Meredith smirked. "We had our fun a half hour ago."

"Yep, she's so mean to me, Laur…", he sighed, tickling the baby's belly to cheer her up. Laura let out a giggle and nuzzled her face into Derek's neck.

"All better now, Princess?", he asked cheerfully, propping the baby up in his arms and kissing her cheek.

Meredith's growling stomach could be heard over Laura's laughter and Derek looked over to his fiancé. "You", he pointed to her. "Need to eat before you pass out", he said as he began walking into the kitchen with Laura.

"What are you gonna make for me?", Meredith asked with her sweetest smile, grabbing the diaper bag off the table and following him into the kitchen.

"I'm holding the baby. So the question is…what are you making for me?", he teased, kissing her cheek.

Meredith cocked at her head at him and scrunched her nose. "Fine", she said, walking over to the fridge. "We have some left over grilled cheese…"

"Delicious", he joked. He decided to hand Laura over to Meredith who cuddled the baby close to her. Laura's little thumb popped out of her mouth and she grabbed a fistful of Meredith's hair. She immediately put it into her mouth and began sucking on it.

"Does that taste good?", Meredith giggled as she walked over to the fridge and stood next to Derek.

Derek glanced over at the baby. "I think she's hungry too", he laughed.

"I think so", Meredith agreed. "Are you hungry, sweet pea?"

Laura glanced up at Meredith and smiled; all traces of her tears long gone. "Foo?", she asked with her wide green eyes that were identical to Meredith's.

"Yep, food", Meredith laughed. "Let's see what you have in here", she said, propping the baby on her hip and looking in the tote bag for food.

"You look cute like that", Derek commented with a grin as he looked through some take-out menus.

Meredith glanced back at him. "With a baby on my hip?", she giggled.

"It suits you", he said with a smile. "Very mommy-ish."

"Ma?", Laura asked, looking back and forth between Meredith and Derek.

Derek attempted to avert another crying fit at the mention of the word "mommy" by quickly changing the subject. "That's Aunt Meredith. Can you say Meredith?", he asked excitedly.

"Meh?", she asked, pointing to Meredith.

"Yep. Meh", Derek chuckled.

"And this is Uncle Derek", Meredith said with a smile, pointing to him.

"Deh", she squealed, bouncing a bit in Meredith's arms.

Meredith smiled and looked at the baby, who was still sucking on her hair. "She's cute."

"I still can't get over how much the two of you look alike, especially after seeing your baby pictures", Derek remarked as he studied both of them.

"Yeah, I guess she does", Meredith agreed.

"I hope ours look just like you", he said warmly as he helped Meredith put Laura into the high chair.

After Laura was seated comfortably, Meredith wrapped her arms around Derek's neck and kissed him softly. "What if they're boys?"

"I already told you we're having girls", he said with a knowing grin.

"Uh huh", she laughed. "And how do you know this?"

"I just know", he shrugged. Meredith looked at him incredulously. "I've guessed the sexes of eleven of my nieces and nephews correctly."

"Seriously?", Meredith asked incredulously.

Derek grinned. "It's true. Ask Mark. Or call my mom."

"I'm not going to call your mom, Derek", she laughed.

"I'm telling you. Girls", he said as he picked up a menu for a pizza shop. "How's pizza sound?"

"That's fine. Can we get the Meat Lovers?"

"You're ruining my diet", he teased.

"It's meat, Derek. Learn to live a little", she mocked, Velcro-ing Laura's bib around her neck in preparation for whatever they decided to feed her.

Laura smiled at Meredith and began clapping her hands. "Foo?", she asked again excitedly.

"Yeah", Meredith nodded. "Let's feed you."

After Derek ordered their pizza, he joined Meredith at the kitchen table. "She definitely has your hearty appetite", he teased, kissing her quickly.

Laura pressed her palm to her lips and blew them a kiss, mimicking their kiss with each other. "You want a kiss, Princess?", Derek laughed.

"Kith!", Laura squealed, kicking her feet against the high chair.

Derek and Meredith leaned in and kissed either side of Laura's cheeks, causing the baby to giggle in delight. "Aren't you a happy girl", Derek said with a smile.

"Foo", Laura clapped.

"Okay. Let's feed her. I don't want her to get cranky like you when you don't eat", he teased.

"And you say I'm the mean one", she sighed, rolling her eyes.

"You know I'm kidding", Derek laughed. "Okay, let's see some of your food options, shall we?" He pulled out several of the Gerber Lil' Entrees from the bag and showed them to her.

"How about creamy chicken, noodles, and vegetables?", he suggested with a smile.

Laura shook her head. "No."

"Okay, then", Meredith laughed. "How about mashed potatoes, chicken, and gravy?", she asked, handing Laura the little package of food so she could look at it.

"No", Laura said definitively, dropping it onto the tray of her high chair.

Both Derek and Meredith laughed. "Okay. How about the cheese ravioli? Mmm, that sounds yummy…", Derek smiled.

"Teef", Laura giggled, pointing to several of the little teeth in her mouth, seeming to forget all about her food selections.

"You have teeth? Let's see", Derek said enthusiastically. Laura gave them a big smile, causing her slightly chubby cheeks to dimple.

"You have very nice teeth", Derek laughed. "You use teeth to eat, don't you?"

Whether or not she understood what Derek was saying, Laura nodded her head and began twisting some of her dark blonde hair that matched Meredith's in her fingers.

"Ooh, Laur, how about some macaroni and cheese?", Meredith said excitedly.

Laura shook her head again. "No", she laughed.

"Oh, you think this is funny, huh?", Derek chuckled, poking the baby's belly. "Your tummy is hungry."

"I don't think she wants any of this", Meredith giggled, digging around in the diaper bag for anything else Laura could eat. "There's little snacks in here, but I want her to eat something besides those."

They continued to get Laura to eat something, each time followed with "no." A few minutes later, they heard the doorbell ring, signaling the arrival of their pizza. Derek walked to the front door and got the pizza from the college-aged delivery guy, tipping him generously. Derek delivered pizza during college, so he always made it a point to give a nice tip, knowing what a thankless job it was.

"Here we go…a box of clotted artery pizza", he joked, setting the pizza down on the table and getting plates and drinks for them.

Meredith opened the box and grabbed a slice, not even bothering to wait for a plate. "Mmm, but it's so worth it", she sighed, taking a bite.

"Dat", Laura pointed to Meredith's pizza.

Derek joined the two of them at the table and poured drinks for them. "You want some pizza, Laur?"

"Derek, I don't know…can she eat that?", Meredith asked. Molly had mentioned that Laura was a picky eater and getting her to eat might be a bit of a challenge, but she wasn't so sure pizza was an okay choice.

"We can just give her some cheese", Derek shrugged, picking off the meat and pulling some cheese off his slice, blowing on it slightly too cool it off for her.

Derek handed it to Laura, who looked at it for a moment before putting it in her mouth and chewing it. After swallowing it, she opened her mouth, waiting for more.

"The cheese seems to be a big hit", Meredith giggled, taking some off her own slice and feeding it to the baby.

Derek laughed. "Yep. Definitely your niece. Choosing pizza cheese over a meal…"

"Shut up", she giggled. "Should we give her some apple juice or something?"

"Yeah. Just make sure you put some water in with it", Derek told her, seeing if Laura would eat some crust softened with sauce.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, doing as Derek had instructed. After filling up her bottle, she set it down on her tray. "You're hungry, huh?", she giggled as she took her second slice from the pizza box.

Laura picked up the bottle with both hands and took a sip before waiting for one of them to feed her more. "Foo", she squealed happily. Meredith and Derek just laughed, surprised at what a good eater she was. By the time she was finished, they were surprised that she's actually eaten a good bit of it.

"She's a mess", Meredith giggled as she got the baby from the high chair and propped her on her arm so Derek could wipe some of the sauce off with a dish towel.

"Someone needs a bath", Derek nodded as he wiped off the baby's chin.

Laura gripped Meredith's finger. "Baf?", she questioned with wide eyes.

"Yes. Bath", Meredith laughed. "Der, could you get her bath stuff from the living room and I'll meet you upstairs?"

Derek nodded. "Yep." He gathered up all of the things they would need and met Meredith in her room to find her standing over the bed taking off the little polka dot outfit she was wearing.

"Think you can handle the diaper while I go set up this little tub seat for her?", he teased, kissing her temple.

"It's just pee. I think I can manage", Meredith giggled.

Meredith wrapped the baby in her little terrycloth towel and carried her into the bathroom where Derek had already filled the tub with a few inches of warm water. "Are you ready, Princess?", Derek asked as Meredith took the towel off the baby and slipped her into the little bath seat.

Laura splashed her hands and feet in the water excitedly. Clearly, she was one of the few babies that actually enjoyed bath time. Derek and Meredith knelt on the side of the tub and began pouring some water on her little body so they could clean her off.

As Meredith was lathering some baby shampoo into her hair while Derek entertained her, Alex entered the bathroom. "Hey", he greeted.

"Hey Alex", Meredith smiled. "We're just giving her a bath."

"I can see that", Alex laughed. "I just wanted to know if that pizza was reserved for Mer's breakfast or not."

Meredith smirked. "I hardly eat pizza for breakfast anymore."

"Sure you don't", he teased. "So can I have some?"

"Yeah. You and Izzie are welcomed to eat it", Derek replied as he began washing off the baby with some lavender and chamomile baby soap.

"Alright, thanks. We're going to Joe's once Iz gets out of the shower but I'm starved", Alex yawned. "By the way, you two look adorable with a baby…", he smirked.

"You think so?", Meredith asked with a giggle, attempting to scratch an itch on her nose with her soapy hands.

Alex grinned, laughing slightly. "I'm proud."

Izzie made her way into Meredith's room wrapped in her bath towel. "Mer, I'm borrowing your lotion", she called out before looking into the bathroom. "Well, hello there", Izzie said in a baby-like voice. "Are you Miss Laura?"

"La", Laura squealed excitedly, pointing to herself.

Izzie walked over to the tub and watched as Meredith and Derek continued to clean up the baby. "You two are naturals", she beamed.

"Thanks", Derek laughed.

"Oh, this is too cute. Alex, isn't this the sweetest thing you've ever seen?", Izzie gushed, squatting down to tickle Laura's wet belly with her finger. The baby let out a laugh and began splashing some water as she moved her hands and feet.

"Oh you are just adorable. Mer, she looks exactly like you", Izzie commented.

"Derek said that too", Meredith giggled as she and Derek rinsed the soap off her body.

"She looks like she could be your daughter…", Izzie said with a smile. "You two are going to have the cutest kids."

Both Meredith and Derek looked over at Izzie and smiled. The thought made both of them smile. Spending this time with Laura made them both look forward to the day when they would become parents to their own little ones. "Aww, that's sweet, Iz", Meredith said warmly.

Izzie stood up from her spot at the side of the tub. "It's true. And we're going to babysit, right Alex?"

"Right", Alex grinned.

"Okay, well, I'm going to go get dressed. See you guys later. If you have trouble putting her to bed, call me. I'll help", Izzie offered as she and Alex made their way out of the room.

"Thanks, Iz", Derek called back. "She's right, you know", he whispered to Meredith.

"What?"

"We are going to have the cutest kids", he grinned. "Daughters."

"What if you're wrong about this whole having girls thing?", Meredith asked with a giggle as she picked the wet, slippery baby out of the tub and handed her to Derek, who wrapped her in her towel.

Derek held the baby close to his chest to keep her warm, not caring if his own clothing got wet in the process. "I have a hunch", he shrugged.

"Okay", Meredith laughed as they laid the baby down on the bed and dried her off.

"You make fun of me now…", he smirked, kissing her cheek softly. "I'm going to make a bottle for her. I'll be back."

"Okay", Meredith said with a soft smile as Derek left the room, leaving Meredith alone with the baby.

"You are really cute", Meredith whispered as she powdered Laura's bottom and fastened a diaper on her. Laura just looked up at Meredith and giggled as she played with her little Minnie Mouse stuffed animal.

"Meh", she said happily, giving Meredith a smile.

"You're a smart little girl", Meredith giggled as she finished putting on Laura's yellow duck pajamas and picked her up.

Laura held her little Minnie Mouse in one hand and sucked the thumb of her other hand, resting her head on Meredith's shoulder. Apparently the bath had made her tired. Meredith hoped they wouldn't have any trouble getting her to sleep tonight.

"Look at you", Derek grinned as he froze in the doorway holding a bottle. "You look…"

"Weird?", Meredith asked with a giggle.

Derek walked over and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "I was going say beautiful."

"Don't get too attached. She's not our baby", Meredith laughed through her yawn.

Derek chuckled. "I know."

"So this is what families do? Watch their nieces and stuff?", she asked as the two of them settled down on the bed against the headboard.

Derek took a seat next to her and handed her a bottle. "Generally, they do stuff like this. Yeah."

"Hmm…this family thing might be okay", she said with a smile, cradling Laura in her arms to feed her.

"You and Lexie have gotten to be good friends. That's a start", Derek pointed out.

"They're all really nice. Lexie said they want to take us out to lunch for watching her since I refused to let them pay us. It could be kinda nice to have sisters..."

"I'm sure you guys could be close. We're already babysitting . They must trust us or else they wouldn't have left their daughter with us", Derek reasoned.

"That's true", she said, nodding her head slightly.

"You okay?"

Meredith looked up at him. "Oh. Yeah. I just…this is nice. I never would have pegged myself for this person—the one who'd rather be here babysitting with you than out drinking with my friends and getting all horny for you", she giggled tiredly.

"As much as I love drunken, horny Meredith, I love this Meredith just as much", he grinned as he leaned in to kiss her.

"You're so cheesy", Meredith yawned.

He laughed. "It's true."

"Hmm. I love you", she said softly, leaned her head on his shoulder.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "I love you, too. So much." He wrapped his arm around Meredith's small frame and just enjoyed their time together. He knew this was only temporary, but he couldn't help but enjoy the time they were spending with their little niece.

Having four days off was rare, and some may have called them crazy to spend two of the four days babysitting. But to them, this was fun. If anything, it helped them realize just how much they wanted to be parents in the future. As Derek watched Meredith feed the bay with ease, he couldn't help but get excited for when they would be blessed with a little miracle of their own.

**I know, I know. Probably too fluffy. I had no intention of making this chapter so long, but I couldn't help myself. MerDer and babies turn me into a big sap that writes twelve pages worth of fluffy goodness. And there's still more fluff to come.**

**Reviews make my day. :)**


	25. Aunt and Uncle

**Disclaimer: If I owned Grey's Anatomy, every episode would be two hours long like the season five premiere is going to be. And the second hour would always be dedicated solely to Meredith and Derek.**

"Morning, Princess", Derek said softly as he walked into Izzie's room to get Laura from her port-a-crib. He had heard her babbling to herself on the baby monitor on Meredith's nightstand and decided he'd go get her.

"Did you sleep well?", he asked as he picked her up. Laura yawned before giving Derek a small smile. Surprisingly, Laura hadn't made a peep since she fell asleep. That's one thing she and Meredith apparently had in common. Once they were asleep, they were tuned out to the rest of the world.

"Meh?", she asked softly; her little fingers playing with the collar of Derek's tee shirt.

Derek chuckled. "You're a smart little girl, aren't you? Aunt Meredith is sleeping. Why don't we go wake her up?", he said as they made their way back to Meredith's bedroom to find her lying on her back snoring.

"She just sounds scary, but she's not", he joked. He set Laura down on the covers and let her crawl up toward Meredith.

"Meh", Laura said with a smile. She sat her little pajama clad bottom down on Derek's pillow and began gently stroking Meredith's forehead.

"Hmm", Meredith mumbled, still in a sleepy state. Derek sat down on the end of the bed and smiled at the two of them. Laura leaned down and pressed a sloppy kiss to Meredith's cheek.

"Hmm", Meredith sighed. Her eyelids fluttered open and she reached her arm across to Derek's side of the bed to find it empty. She turned her head slightly and found the little green eyed girl staring back at her, a happy smile on her face.

"Oh. Hi there", Meredith giggled through her yawn. She sat up slightly and looked at Derek.

Derek smiled and walked around the bed to come sit down next to Meredith. "She was asking for you, so I decided to let her wake you up", he explained softly.

Meredith laughed and leaned over to kiss him. "She did."

Laura tilted her chin up to look at them. "Kith", she squealed.

Derek looked over to Meredith, who smiled. They leaned down and kissed opposite sides of the baby's cheeks. Laura giggled in delight and clapped her tiny hands together.

"I sort of want to keep her", Meredith giggled, pulling Laura into her lap.

Derek laughed. "I think Molly and Eric would miss her."

"Yeah, probably", Meredith nodded. "She's just so cute."

"She's adorable", Derek grinned, poking Laura's belly to make her laugh. "What do you want to do today, Laur?"

"Duck", Laura said, pointing to her yellow footie pajamas.

"Do you like your ducky jammies?", Derek asked with a smile.

Laura looked up at him and smiled, nodding slightly. She leaned back to rest her head on Meredith's chest.

"Do you want to go to the park for a walk?", he asked enthusiastically.

"Wak?", Laura asked with wide eyes.

"Yep, a walk. Then we could go out for food…", he laughed.

"Foo", Laura giggled as she rested her hand on top of Meredith's.

"You're definitely related to me", Meredith laughed.

Laura pointed to Meredith's ring. "Wing", she said softly, in awe of the shining diamond in the light.

"Isn't it pretty, Laura?", Derek asked.

"Pitty", Laura smiled, showing her little toothy smile.

"Aunt Meredith is very pretty too", Derek grinned.

Meredith laughed. "Aunt Meredith has to pee and brush her teeth."

"Pee", Laura giggled, pointing to her diaper as Meredith handed her off to Derek.

"Did you pee too, Princess?", Derek asked. "Let's change your diaper then."

"Have fun with that", Meredith giggled as she closed the bathroom door.

Derek chuckled. "Your Aunt Meredith is evil."

"I heard that", Meredith called out as Derek went to go get a diaper from the bag in Izzie's room.

"I wanted you to", he called back, the humor evident in his voice.

After changing Laura, he decided to let her crawl around on the bed in her diaper so they could dress her together.

"Hey", Meredith yawned as she emerged from the bathroom.

"Hey", Derek said with a smile. He loved how adorable she looked in the morning when her hair was messy and the sleepiness was still wearing off. "Just so you know, you owe me a dirty diaper. There was…more than just pee", he chuckled.

"Thank you for making sure I knew that", Meredith sighed, rolling her eyes and directing her attention to the ten month old baby. "Want to get dressed, sweet pea?" Laura looked at Meredith and crawled over to her.

"Let's pick out a pretty outfit for you", Derek said with a grin. He took some clothes out of the pink and green tote bag and showed them to her.

"Dess", Laura smiled, pointing to a long sleeve pink dress with big blue flowers, perfect for the beginning of spring time.

"You have very good taste", Meredith giggled, kissing the baby's cheek.

Derek felt his breath hitch in his throat at the simple but loving gesture. Meredith's maternal instincts were shining through since the second Laura arrived, and he had never felt more in love with her. He couldn't even imagine the kind of love she would have for her own child one day.

"We should put her in that little white sweater too, just in case it gets cold. Oh, and are they any white tights in there? That would be adorable", Meredith laughed, playing with Laura's little feet.

"Yeah, there's a pair right here", Derek told her as he pulled them out of the bag.

"You are going to look so cute in your pretty outfit", Meredith cooed to the baby, who crawled into her lap.

"These look tricky", Derek laughed, holding up the tiny white tights. "Do you want me to hold her while you put them on?"

Meredith nodded and handed the baby off to Derek. Meredith easily slid the tights up Laura's legs and around her waist, making sure they weren't too snug against her belly. They then dressed her in her little outfit with ease. Content that they had done a good job, they each took turns helping her walk back and forth across the floor while the other got showered and dressed.

When they were finished, they took her downstairs where the three of them ate breakfast and got ready to go. They knew that being cooped up in the house would be boring, so they decided a day out with the three of them would be fun.

"Are you sure that's in there right?", Meredith asked as Derek strapped Laura in her car seat in the back of his car.

Derek laughed. "For the hundredth time, it's in there right." He handed Laura her little toy before shutting the door of the backseat.

"I just want to make sure", Meredith told him as he shut her car door and walked around to the driver's side.

After he got in and buckled himself in, he turned to the backseat. "Your Aunt Meredith worries too much", he chuckled.

"And Uncle Derek is being an a-s-s", Meredith smirked.

Derek leaned over the console and pressed a kiss to Meredith's lips. "You love me."

"I know I do", Meredith sighed before smiling softly.

"Ready to go to the park, Princess?", he asked as he adjusted the rear view mirror. Laura giggled from the backseat and nodded slightly.

"Let's go then", Derek laughed. They pulled out of the driveway and began their adventure for the day.

--

After arriving at the small park near downtown Seattle, Meredith got Laura from the car seat while Derek set up the stroller and made sure they had everything they needed in the baby's bag.

They buckled her in the stroller and made sure she was all settled with her toy before they began their little stroll.

Other park-goers would occasionally glance toward them with warm smiles, assuming that they were their own little family.

"I love you", Meredith said softly, giving Derek a quick kiss before resting her head on his shoulder.

"I love you, too", he said with a smile. "Having fun?"

"Yeah." Meredith nodded. "People think she's ours, you know?"

"Yeah I know", Derek laughed. "That's okay. One day we'll be back here doing this with our own."

Meredith giggled softly but remained silent, just enjoying this time with her fiancé. Sometimes, it still felt strange referring to him as her fiancé. He was always just Derek to her. The ring had been on her finger for a while now, and still, every time she looked at it, it took her breath away. She still couldn't believe how much her life had changed over the past few months. She was finally getting what she wanted her whole life, and that fact always made her smile.

They remained in a comfortable silence as they walked through the park, occasionally peeking at Laura to make sure she was okay. The baby was sitting contentedly, a slight smile on her face as she sucked her thumb.

As they walked along, they were confronted by a little girl no more than five years old with tears running down her little red cheeks. She tugged on Meredith's sweater and sniffled.

Meredith looked to Derek confusedly before kneeling down to the little girl's level. "You okay, sweetie?", Meredith asked softly, trying not to frighten her.

The little girl looked at Meredith hesitantly before shaking her head slightly, wiping her tears with the sleeve of her coat.

"Are you lost? Did you lose your mommy?", Meredith asked, keeping her voice kind and sweet to keep the little girl calm.

She started to whimper softly as a few more tears rolled down her stained cheeks. "Mhm", she mumbled in a barely audible voice.

"Okay, well, why don't we wait here until she finds you. I'm sure she'll be back soon", Meredith assured her.

The girl fiddled with the sleeves of her jacket with her little fingers, deciding whether or not to trust the kind stranger in front of her.

Meredith noticed her hesitation. "My name is Meredith. I'm a doctor. And I know that mommy and daddy told you not to talk to strangers, but I promise we'll just sit with you, okay?" She really didn't know what to say to the little girl. She just knew that the little girl would be better off sitting with her and Derek than someone dangerous who could possibly kidnap her.

"Okay", the small child whispered, wiping some tears off her cheeks.

"Okay", Meredith said softly. She pulled a tissue out of her coat pocket and held it out to her. "Here you go, sweetheart… I mean, if you want it."

The little girl looked at her and slowly took the tissue out of Meredith's hand. Meredith smiled and the girl followed her over to an empty bench, Derek by her side. He was amazed by her calm demeanor with the child. If she ever got tired being a surgeon, she could certainly make a living as a kindergarten teacher.

"We can just sit right here. I'm sure Mom will be here soon", Meredith comforted.

"Okay", the child hiccupped.

The girl sat down next to Meredith, then looked at Derek curiously. Meredith noticed and decided to make some conversation, hoping it would help the girl relax. "This is my…Derek. He's my…we're getting married", she said with a smile. Derek took Meredith's hand and squeezed it slightly.

"Hi", Derek greeted, giving her a little wave.

"Hi", she whispered, swaying her little feet back and forth on the bench.

"Tee!", Laura squealed happily from her stroller.

Derek chuckled. "You see the tree, Laur?" He picked her up from the stroller and set her down on his lap.

"This is our niece, Laura. We're babysitting her", Meredith explained with a smile, fixing Laura's little pink shoes.

Laura reached up and touched her fingers to Derek's chin. "Deh. Foo."

"You're already hungry again?", Derek laughed. "Okay then, let's get a snack." He peeled a banana for her and began feeding it to her piece by piece.

"Are um…did you want…are you hungry? I could get you some ice cream or a pretzel or something…", Meredith offered with a warm smile.

"Okay", the girl nodded slightly.

"Okay", Meredith repeated, standing up and walking over to the little cart next to the bench with the girl. They returned with three pretzels, one for each of them.

"Thank you", Derek said as Meredith handed him the pretzel.

"Guh", Laura pointed, referring to the little girl next to Meredith, not noticing the new food item in Derek's hand.

Meredith laughed. "That's right, Laura. This is a big girl, like you'll be one day. This is uh…"

"Amy", the girl said with a soft smile; her tears ceasing thanks to their attempts to keep her calm.

"Amy? That's my sister's name", Derek grinned. "She's going to have a baby."

"I have a new baby brother", Amy said quietly before taking a bite of her pretzel.

"Wow, really?", Meredith asked enthusiastically.

The small child nodded. "He was born a few weeks ago."

"That's so exciting", Meredith smiled. "I bet you're a great big sister."

"I help mommy and daddy sometimes", Amy told them. "But I don't like changing diapers."

Meredith laughed. "I don't like changing diapers either", she said, giving Derek a small smirk.

They spent the next few minutes talking to the little girl, trying to make her happy and at the same time, praying that her mother showed up. Thankfully, she did.

"Oh my God, Amy!", her frazzled mother, pushing a stroller, said when she spotted her on the park bench with what looked like two kind strangers.

Amy looked up with wide eyes. "Mommy!", she called out, running to give her mother a hug.

Her mother walked over to Meredith and Derek. "I am so sorry. She just wandered off. I was fixing my son's sock, and when I look up, she's gone", she explained, tears coming to her eyes.

"Oh it was no problem. She came up to us and we found out that she was lost, so we just decided to sit here with her. There was no way we'd just leave her here", Derek said assuringly.

"We're not creeps or anything, I promise. We're both doctors and it's…we both work with kids sometimes and we tried to just keep her calm", Meredith rambled nervously. She didn't want Amy's mother to think they were evil kidnappers whose plans had been foiled when her mother showed up.

Her mother smiled. "Thank you both so much. I'm so glad she found some good people in the world. I always told her that if she ever got lost, to go into a store and ask an employee, or ask a mommy and daddy with kids to help."

Derek nodded. "You're raising a very smart little girl. And really, it's no problem. We're just glad we were here to help."

"I have to give you something for your trouble", the girl's mother said, reaching for her purse.

"Oh no. We couldn't take anything from you. We just did what we knew is the right thing to do", Meredith said softly, reaching for Derek's free hand; the other still holding Laura.

"Thank you. Thank you both so much. I'm so grateful", she said warmly, putting her hand over her heart.

"You're welcome", Meredith said with a smile and a nod. "Bye, Amy."

"Bye Meredith, bye Derek, bye Laura", Amy smiled. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, sweetheart", Derek grinned.

Amy's mother nodded graciously and took her daughter's hand. After they parted ways, Derek looked to Meredith. "I am so proud of you", he beamed.

"What? Why?", she asked, reaching for the baby who held her arms out for her.

"Because you were like…unbelievably calm and sweet to her", Derek complimented, fixing Laura's sweater after Meredith had taken her.

"I really didn't do anything special", Meredith shrugged. "I just did what I knew how to do."

"I don't think I have been any more in love with you than I am right now", Derek grinned, pressing his lips to Meredith's for a soft and tender kiss.

"Hmm", Meredith smiled against his lips. "We're in a public park."

Derek chuckled. "I don't care."

"Love you", Meredith breathed as they pulled apart from the kiss.

"I love you, too", he smiled, tucking some hair behind her ear.

Laura giggled and patted her cheeks with her palms, expecting a kiss. Both of them laughed and kissed her cheeks as they'd been doing every time.

"Is it bad that I'm sort of falling in love with her?", Meredith asked with a smile, rubbing Laura's back gently.

"I am too. Don't worry", he laughed.

"Cristina would mock me forever if she knew that. She thinks babies are toxic", she giggled.

"I'm glad she's going to be one of our godmothers", Derek joked.

"I have a feeling our kids will win her over", Meredith nodded confidently.

Derek looked at her and grinned. "I think so too."

"Is it weird that we're already talking about kids?"

"No, not at all", Derek said softly. "I think it's good to talk about it. We both want them, so it's only normal that we'd talk about it. And having her here is certainly making the idea more exciting", he laughed, caressing Laura's cheek softly.

"Yeah", Meredith agreed, smiling at him. They didn't want to have children until after they were settled into married life for a little while, but even thinking that one day they'd be parents was enough to make her feel lucky to have a man in her life that wanted it all. With her.

--

After their walk in the park, they decided to go to a little restaurant before heading back to the house. They could tell Laura was getting tired and wanted to make sure she had a nap.

"Your daughter is so well behaved", the waitress complimented as she brought out their food.

"She's our niece actually, but thank you", Derek grinned.

"Wow, really? She looks just like you", she said, referring to Meredith.

Meredith laughed. "Lots of people say that actually."

"They're definitely related", Derek said with a smile, tickling Laura's belly as she sat in the high chair.

"She's lucky to have her aunt and uncle to treat her to lunch", the waitress joked, setting Laura's little plate of macaroni and cheese in front of her.

"She keeps us entertained. It's the least we could do", Derek teased, squeezing Meredith's hand gently from across the table.

The waitress smiled. "She's adorable."

"She's very easy to fall in love with", Meredith giggled.

"I bet she is", she smiled before leaving them to eat their lunch.

"You really wanted chicken fingers and fries?", Derek chuckled.

Meredith bit into a fry. "Yes. Why?"

"No reason. You're just cute", he said, taking a bite of his Caesar salad.

"Ordering chicken fingers and fries makes me cute?", she asked with a smirk.

"Yes. It does", he laughed. "In the best possible way, I promise."

"Okay then", she giggled. "Is that good, Laur?"

Laura nodded and smiled as Derek fed her a small spoonful of her macaroni and cheese. "You're a good eater…almost as good as Aunt Meredith", he said amusedly, glancing up at Meredith.

"I _was_ going to let Uncle Derek get lucky tonight, but after that comment, I don't think that's going to happen", Meredith shot back, a playful glint in her eyes.

"I'll convince you", he said confidently. "I always convince you."

"Hmm…you think so?", Meredith challenged, feeding another spoonful to Laura. She didn't even know why she bothering to fight about it with him. When it came to sex, he always won her over. Not that she minded though. She was just as insatiable as he was.

--

When they finished eating, they went back to the house so Laura could take a nap. While she napped, Meredith helped Derek make dinner, which helped them occupy their time while the baby slept. Surprisingly, they found themselves bored without her around. They had only been babysitting her for a little over one day, and they already knew they'd miss her when she left.

When she woke up, they ate dinner together, then let her walk around the living room, falling down occasionally and landing on her diaper covered bottom. They even found themselves crawling around chasing after her as she shrieked happily, trying to get away from them before they could catch her and tickle her. Laura seemed to love all of their attention and affection, and they were more than happy to give it. Molly and Eric were definitely raising a bright, happy little girl that Meredith and Derek had already fallen in love with. While both of them were missing the OR and the normal hustle and bustle of the hospital, they found themselves wishing they could have more time with her.

After she was worn out from all the activity, they gave her a bath and a bottle, followed by a little story and put her in her crib when she was just starting to doze off.

Of course Meredith had agreed to sex after the baby fell asleep. Laura was a good sleeper, and they decided if they could manage some quiet sex, it was okay. They reasoned that practicing quiet sex was something they'd eventually have to do anyway with kids down the hall.

"Hmm…I love you", Meredith murmured, her naked body pressed to Derek's as they lay on their sides wrapped in an embrace.

Derek ran his hands up and down her bare back, sucking and nipping at the sensitive skin of her neck. "Love you too."

"I like playing house with you", she whispered, stroking her fingers up and down his erect shaft.

"You too", Derek groaned appreciatively as she rolled on top of him.

Meredith pressed her lips to his and kissed him. "Do you want to be inside of me?", she whispered into his ear.

Derek sighed. "Please."

"Okay", she whispered, lacing the fingers of both her hands with his before lowering herself down onto his erection. "Oh my…Der", she panted, slowly taking him into her body inch by inch.

"Meredith", he moaned, her tightness enveloping him, molding to him perfectly.

"Oh God", she whimpered as he filled her to the hilt, forcing her to acclimate to his size.

Derek looked up at her. "You okay?"

Meredith simply nodded and bit her lip, squeezing her muscles tightly around him, urging him to move.

"I. Love. You", he said as he began thrusting in and out of her.

"I love you, too." She moaned in pleasure as he brushed his tongue across her lips. She granted him entry and their tongues clashed and dueled as Derek continued to thrust in and out of her welcoming body.

As they found their rhythm, Meredith found herself moaning uncontrollably, tilting her head back in pleasure. "Quiet", Derek reminded her in a whisper, lavishing attention on her breasts with his mouth.

"Quiet", Meredith repeated. They continued their synchronized rhythm until both were on edge, waiting for the moment when the waves of pleasure would come crashing down on them.

"Der", she panted, feeling her walls close in around him as she rode out her strong orgasm.

The feeling of her clamping down sent Derek over the top and he released inside of her. "Mer…Meredith", he breathed, pressing his lips against hers.

Meredith collapsed onto his chest, breathing heavily as she came down from her climax. "We…we're…good at quiet", she panted, trying to catch her breath.

Derek ran his fingers through her hair. "Yeah…we are."

"I love you. I love you so much", she breathed, gently easing herself off of him. She snuggled into his side and he wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you too, Meredith", he smiled, kissing her forehead.

"I think we'll be able to pull off quiet sex with kids in the next room", Meredith said, still slightly out of breath.

"But we should probably still practice a lot…just to make sure we get really good at it", he joked.

Meredith lifted her head and kissed his cheek. "Practice makes perfect…", she giggled softly.

"I thought you didn't believe in perfect", he teased, pulling the covers up over both of them as they prepared for sleep.

"I don't. But this is pretty close", she sighed contentedly as she began drifting off to sleep, thinking of how perfect life was in this very moment.

**Yay for sex. ;)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	26. More Laura Time

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. **

**ABC is showing 4.11 tonight, so I wrote this fast so I could post it early. Maybe a little fluff can ease the pain of that horrific episode…**

Derek rolled over in bed, expecting to feel the warm body of his fiancé lying next to him. Instead, when he reached his arm over, he felt the soft red sheet, no sign of Meredith anywhere. But when he heard her voice on the baby monitor, he knew exactly where she was.

"Hey sleepy head. Good morning", she cooed.

Derek laid his head on her pillow, breathing in the familiar scent that he loved as he listened to her talk to the baby.

"Did you sleep well, sweet pea?", she whispered, picking Laura up from her crib. The baby laid her head on Meredith's shoulder and put her thumb in her mouth. Meredith kissed the top of Laura's head and continued to talk to her. "I hope I can watch you grow up…when I first found out about your family, I have to admit I was a little jealous. I never had what your mommy or aunt Lexie had growing up…", she said quietly.

"I didn't have any sisters or…cousins or…anyone really. But now I do. I have a family. A family that I could actually grow close with eventually. And the more time I spend with you, the more I want that. I want our kids to have cousins. Not that they won't—Uncle Derek has fourteen, well almost fifteen, nieces and nephews. But I think that if they knew you, it would be okay too."

"I'm trying, Laur. I'm trying to be a good aunt. I've never done this…but with you, you make it easy…you make me think about having my own one day with Uncle Derek. Uncle Derek is going to be a good daddy", Meredith whispered, tears coming to her eyes as she smiled softly.

Derek's eyes, too, were becoming moist listening to her have a little heart to heart with the baby.

"He's going to be such a good daddy one day. I see him holding you, and I wonder what it'll be like when he holds our baby for the first time", she smiled, a single tear escaping her eye. "He's one of those guys that you can just look at…and you know he's sort of meant to be a dad."

"…But me? I'm not so sure I'll be as good of a parent as he will", she sighed. "I'm sort of surprised you seem to like me", she laughed softly.

"Being a mommy isn't really something I'd ever thought about until I met Uncle Derek. He always tells me that I'll make a great mom one day. I don't know. I'm going to need all the help I can get, so that's why I'm sort of glad you're here", she rambled on to the baby, who looked up at her and smiled sleepily, her thumb still tucked away in her mouth. "Uncle Derek…he makes it okay. He knows I'll probably freak out when we eventually have one, but I know that he's here for me. He'll always be here. I love him, Laur. I love him so much", she said quietly, a small smile tugging on the corners of her mouth.

"My point in telling you all this is that…you have a good family. You have a good family that loves you. And I…I want to be a good aunt. I want to be involved in your life. I want to watch you grow up and see you turn into this amazing person I know you're going to be. I love you, Laur", she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the baby's forehead. "Aunt Meredith and Uncle Derek love you."

Derek heard the soft patter of her feet making their way back to her bedroom with the baby. He pretended to be sleeping, but Meredith knew better. She walked over him and swatted him slightly with a pillow. "I know you're awake", she smirked.

Derek opened his eyes and smiled. "Hmm?"

"Oh don't even…", Meredith sighed, rolling her eyes. She noticed that he was lying on her side of the bed, where the baby monitor was. "You were actually eavesdropping on me?"

"I was", Derek admitted with a sigh. "But in my defense, I only woke up because you weren't here for me to hold onto. Then I heard you talking to her and…"

Meredith blushed slightly. "A-s-s."

"Meredith", he chuckled. Meredith sat down on the bed with the baby in her lap and looked at him, a slight smirk playing on her features. "Everything you said…that was beautiful…", he said honestly.

"Oh."

"Meredith", he started, gently taking Laura from Meredith's arms. Laura cuddled into Derek's chest and closed her eyes.

"What?"

"I love her, too", he said softly, gently rubbing the baby's back. "And I want to be a part of her life. I want you to know your sisters, Eric…I want you to know them. Susan would want you know them. You deserve it… and of course we'll have our own family, but we can still be a part of their family too."

Meredith smiled softly. "Okay."

"Sorry for eavesdropping", he chuckled slightly.

"It's okay", she whispered, leaning in to kiss him softly.

"Hmm…good morning."

"Morning", she mumbled against his lips.

"It's sort of a shame she's awake…", he joked.

Meredith shook her head. "Dirty dirty man."

"Hmm…maybe", he smirked, leaning in to kiss her again.

"No. You are", she giggled.

"Fine", he sighed. "I can wait until tonight."

"Think you're getting lucky again?"

Derek nodded. "I do", he grinned.

"We'll see", Meredith giggled, shrugging her shoulders noncommittally.

"Whatever you say, Dr. Grey…", he said playfully, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Love you."

"Love you too", she whispered.

Laura looked up at them and laughed. "Lub", she said, patting her cheeks with her hands, waiting for them to kiss her.

They both did leaned in and kissed her cheeks and she squealed happily. "And yes, we do love you", Derek smiled.

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand. "We do."

--

After lunch, Derek was planning to take Meredith's car to the automotive shop to have it serviced. The trunk of the car wasn't shutting correctly, so Derek decided to take it to the shop on one of their days off to have it looked at. Because Meredith wanted to stay home with the baby, Mark offered to follow Derek in his car so he would have a way back home.

When Derek left, Meredith was left all alone with the baby. She was slightly nervous without having Derek by her side, but was fairly certain that she could handle being alone for an hour or so. Laura got sleepy after eating lunch, so Meredith put her down for her nap. She decided to clean up the house a bit before calling Cristina. She hadn't talked to her best friend in a few days, and she wanted to catch up.

"Hey", Meredith said after Cristina answered the phone.

"Hey", Cristina replied. "What are you doing?"

"The baby is asleep and I'm bored", Meredith sighed, getting a popsicle out of the freezer.

Cristina scoffed. "Oh God."

"Fine. Call me names, mock me endlessly. I know you want to", Meredith shrugged, plopping down onto the couch with her snack.

"You and McDreamy having fun playing house?"

Meredith giggled. "We are actually. She's a good baby. And an excellent sleeper."

"Why aren't you and Derek taking advantage of this time to have screaming, hot sex?"

"He's out with Mark. They're taking my car to the car whatever", Meredith said. "We had sex last night though."

"Thanks, I needed to know that", Cristina smirked, laughing slightly.

"It was good, too", Meredith sighed. "I was on top and—"

"Stop. Now." Cristina rolled her eyes. Sometimes, Meredith was a little too free with the sex details. "That's more than I need to know."

Meredith laughed. "Fine. I'll stop."

"So the kid's actually behaving? Lucky you", she said, attempting to avoid a conversation about Derek and all of the porny things he did to her in bed.

"Yeah, she is. We don't want to give her back tomorrow afternoon", Meredith giggled.

"You guys are going to be the family that dresses the same when they go to get the family portrait", Cristina teased.

"That's tacky. I wouldn't do that", Meredith said, shaking her head.

"Derek would."

"Yeah, probably", Meredith laughed. "So I was thinking…we should go to Joe's one night after work this week." Ever since she and Derek had gotten engaged, Meredith felt like she was skipping out on her best friend to spend time with him. Cristina was the constant in her life when Derek wasn't around, and she was grateful to her friend for sticking by her side. She and Cristina needed a night out with their friends like they used to have.

"Yeah. That sounds good", Cristina said, her voice sounding happier.

"Okay, good", Meredith smiled. She heard Derek's cell phone ringing on the end table next to the couch. Apparently he'd forgotten it when he left with Mark.

"Hold on a sec. Derek's phone is ringing…", Meredith said, reaching for the phone and checking to see who was calling. The name she saw on the screen was the last she expected to see.

_Addison_.

"Crap. Addison is calling him. What do I do?", Meredith asked nervously.

"What the hell? Why?"

"What should I do?"

"Answer it", Cristina said simply.

"Crap. Okay. I'll uh…call you back", Meredith told her friend.

"Good luck", Cristina said, trying to stifle a laugh as she hung up the phone.

Meredith flipped open Derek's cell phone and swallowed before speaking. "Hello?", she asked nervously.

"Meredith?", Addison asked confusedly.

"Yeah, um…hi…Addison", Meredith said quietly, silently cursing herself for taking Cristina's advice and answering the phone.

"Oh. Hi, Meredith. I was just wondering if Derek had Amy's phone number. I talked to Linda a few days ago and she told me she was expecting. I wanted to call and say congratulations. I called Linda a few times, but she isn't answering. I would have called one of his sisters but I'll be stuck on the phone for hours", she laughed. "Linda's probably just off babysitting the kids or something", Addison explained. "So how are you doing?"

Meredith bit her lip. "Good, yeah. I'm good. How are you? How's LA?"

"It's great. You know, the sun, the surf…"

"You surf?"

"No. I don't…surf. But if Derek asks, tell him I do", Addison laughed.

Meredith giggled. "Will do."

"So congratulations to you, too, on the engagement…", Addison said sincerely. "I'm really happy for you guys."

"Thank you, Addison", Meredith said with a small smile.

A few moments of awkward silence passed before either of them spoke. "So look, I know this is weird, but it really shouldn't be. Weird, I mean. I don't want you to think I hold anything against you. And I hope you feel the same way about me. Everything that happened—it's for the best", she said definitively.

"It is", Meredith agreed. "And um, thank you, Addison. I'm glad we can be…friends or whatever…even after everything…"

Addison laughed. "I'm coming to the wedding. That says something, right?"

"I guess it does", Meredith replied amusedly.

Addison sighed. "I never hated you, you know?", she admitted, the sincerity evident in her voice.

"I didn't hate you either", Meredith said honestly. "Derek, maybe, but not you."

"The guy's an easy scapegoat", Addison laughed jokingly.

"That's true", Meredith giggled.

"He's a good guy, though. He loves you, Meredith", Addison said genuinely.

"Yeah. I love him too", Meredith said softly.

"We sort of had this conversation when you were on morphine, but I figured it'd be nice to tell you that now that you're not…high", Addison laughed softly.

"We did?"

"I didn't think you'd remember", she said with a smile.

"Well, thank you, Addison", Meredith said softly. "I…thanks."

"You're welcome, Meredith."

They were interrupted when they heard Laura crying in the background. "Is…is that a baby?", Addison asked in shock.

"Yeah", Meredith replied, jogging up the stairs to get Laura from her crib. She didn't stop to put two and two together, and recognize what must have been going on in Addison's mind.

"Oh, so you two…you…Derek didn't tell me that when he told me you were engaged…I mean it makes sense…it's been a little over nine months since I left", Addison stammered.

All of the sudden, a light bulb went off in Meredith's brain. "Oh! No no no", Meredith said quickly. "We don't…I didn't…we didn't have a baby. We're watching my niece…"

Addison sighed. "Oh wow. I…sorry. When I heard a baby crying, babysitting was not what popped into my head", Addison laughed.

"You thought we…"

"Yeah", Addison confessed.

Meredith giggled. "Nope. No baby for us. Well, not yet. We want to, but not…not until after we're married and settled into the house…", she explained.

"So you two are watching Laura?", Addison guessed.

"Yeah", Meredith nodded, tucking the phone to her chin as she lifted the baby out of the crib.

"How is she?"

Meredith smiled. "She's good. We've had her since Wednesday night. She's going back home tomorrow afternoon. It's going to be tough to give her back", she joked.

"Getting attached, huh?"

"Yeah", Meredith smiled softly, holding the baby close. "She's such a good baby. And Derek is so great with her…"

Addison smiled. "Derek was always so good with his nieces and nephews back in New York. He's going to be wonderful father one day", Addison said sincerely.

"Yeah. He is", Meredith agreed. She heard a car door shutting in the driveway and quickly went downstairs to let Derek in. "He just got home actually, so he can give you the number. Sorry…for keeping you so long", she apologized.

"Oh, no it's fine. It was nice to catch up with you. I miss you guys."

"We miss you, too", Meredith said, opening the door for Derek. He looked at her confusedly, wondering who she was talking to. He took Laura from her arms and blew raspberries on the little girl's belly.

"Okay, well, I'll put him on…"

"Okay, thanks. Nice talking to you, Meredith", she said kindly.

Meredith smiled. "You too, Addison." She handed the phone over to Derek, who looked at gaping-mouthed. Meredith just giggled as he handed Laura back to her.

Meredith went into the kitchen with the baby, letting Derek catch up with his ex-wife. She understood that they had known each other for close to thirteen years, and that they were still close like family. She wanted them to be friendly and able to talk to each other.

Derek entered the kitchen as Meredith was pouring some apple juice into a bottle for the baby. He came over and kissed her cheek. "I can't even imagine what you two talked about", he chuckled.

"She's nice, Derek. I could actually see myself being friends with her", she told him, putting the bottle on the tray of the high chair. Laura smiled at the two of them before taking a sip.

"That would certainly be a first…you and my ex-wife hitting it off", he laughed, wrapping his arms around her from behind and kissing her neck.

Meredith tilted her head back and smiled. "We talked about you…"

"Yeah? What did you say?"

"She said you're going to make a great d-a-d-d-y one day", she said softly, spelling out the word to avoid a possible crying fit at the word.

Derek smiled. "She did?"

"Yeah", she replied before starting to laugh. "When she heard Laura crying, she assumed we'd had a baby."

"Me and you?", he asked confusedly.

"Mmhmm" she sighed, melting into his touch.

He smiled against the soft skin of her neck. "One day."

She turned around in his arms to face him. "Yeah."

"I love you." He pulled her close and kissed her tenderly.

"I love you too", she breathed as they pulled apart. She rested her forehead against his and enjoyed a quiet moment with her fiancé. He rubbed his hands up and down her back and she sighed contentedly, laying her head against his chest. Derek peppered soft kisses to the top of her head, breathing the scent that was uniquely Meredith.

They remained in their embrace for a while before Laura decided that she wanted attention. "Pay?", she asked, looking at them with her wide green eyes.

Meredith turned her head to face her. "You want to play, pumpkin?"

Laura nodded and clapped her hands excitedly. Meredith and Derek pulled back from their hug and walked over to the baby. She lifted her hands over her head and Derek picked her up from the high chair. "Let's go play, Princess", he said happily as the three made their way into the living room to play with their little niece.

--

"Are you almost done in there?", Meredith asked with a giggle as she and Derek knelt by the side of the bathtub. Laura was kicking her hands and feet happily in her pink bath seat, splashing water all over Meredith and Derek.

"I don't think she is", Derek laughed, flinching back slightly when Laura splashed some water in his eye.

"Do you like the bathtub, Laur?", Meredith asked, checking to make sure the water was still warm.

"Baf!", she squealed, putting the little yellow wash cloth in her mouth.

Meredith laughed. "I don't think she's tired."

"Doesn't seem like it", he chuckled.

"Duck", Laura giggled, picking up her little rubber ducky and gliding it along the surface of the water.

"You like your duck?", Derek asked happily.

She nodded and hugged it close to her chest before handing it to Meredith. "Thank you", Meredith laughed, holding the dripping duck over the tub.

A few minutes later, Laura decided she was done and looked up at them. "Up", Laura said clearly, reaching her arms up to be taken out of the tub. Meredith got the towel and Derek picked her up and out of the bathtub before handing her over to Meredith, who wrapped her up and held her close.

"Are you all clean now?", Meredith asked softly, kissing Laura's wet head and laying her down on the bed.

"Keen", Laura repeated with a smile, shivering slightly as Meredith dried her off.

Meredith picked the baby up and held her against her chest to keep her warm. She dried Laura off thoroughly before laying her back down on the bed. "Derek, can you hand me a diaper?"

Derek smiled and handed Meredith one of Laura's diapers from the bag. She sprinkled some powder on her and fit the diaper around her waist with ease. "There we go", she said softly, tickling Laura's little feet.

"What do you want to wear, Princess?", Derek asked, holding up a pink sleeper with cows in one hand and a purple one with yellow polka dots on it in the other.

"Cow", Laura pointed, smiling slightly at the little pajamas.

Meredith laughed. "Okay." Derek handed her the pajamas and put them on the girl's tiny body. "All dressed", Meredith smiled, picking Laura up off the bed and kissing her cheek before handing her to Derek.

"I'm going to go get her bottle. I'll be back", she said, kissing his cheek as she left the room.

Derek settled back onto the bed and held Laura in his arms. "You sleepy, Laur?", he asked softly, gently rubbing Laura's back.

Laura looked up at him with wide awake eyes and smiled. "Seep?"

"Yeah, sleep", he chuckled.

"No", she said, playing with Derek's tee shirt between her fingers.

"I don't think she's falling asleep any time soon", he informed Meredith as she walked back into the room with Laura's bottle.

"Guess you're not getting lucky tonight", she said with a giggle, handing him the bottle before walking over to her dresser for some pajamas. "I'm going to go get changed out my wet clothes. Be right back."

Derek laughed. "Okay." Laura was squirming out of his arms so he decided to let her go. Laura rolled onto Meredith's side of the bed, propping her head on her pillow. "You're adorable, you know that?", he laughed, kissing her forehead and propping a pillow next to her so she wouldn't roll off.

Meredith walked back into the room and giggled. "What are you doing?", she asked jokingly with her hands on her hips.

"She likes your side of the bed", Derek laughed. He got up from his spot, which was quickly replaced by Meredith. "I'm going to change."

"Okay", she said softly. Meredith lay down in the bed and propped Laura up slightly with a pillow and handed her the bottle so she could feed herself. "Here you go, sweet pea."

Laura inched herself close to Meredith, leaning her head on Meredith's chest. Meredith wrapped her arm around the baby and cuddled her.

Derek walked back into the room and froze, smiling as his fiancé held their little niece close to her as she drank her bottle all by herself.

Meredith looked up at him confusedly. "What?"

"You", he said, getting in Meredith's side of the bed so Laura was in between them.

"What?"

"You're in complete aunt mode right now", he said softly, pressing a kiss to her lips.

Meredith looked down at the baby and smiled. "I don't think she's tired."

"You're wide awake, huh?", Derek chuckled, wrapping his arm around Meredith. "What did we feed her?"

"I gave her some of my popsicle tonight, remember? Because of the molar that's growing in. I thought the cold might help it", Meredith explained, playing with Laura's hair in between her fingers.

"There's probably not enough sugar in that to make her this wide awake", Derek yawned.

"You better not fall asleep on me", Meredith warned, giggling slightly.

"I'm not", he chuckled, kissing her cheek.

"So what should we do?", Meredith asked, noticing that Laura's bottle was nearly empty.

"We can just lay here with her for a while until she gets sleepy", Derek suggested.

Meredith nodded. "Okay."

Laura took the almost empty bottle from her mouth and handed it to Meredith before crawling into her lap. Meredith set the bottle on her nightstand and scooped the baby up into her arms.

Laura rested her head on Meredith's shoulder and began sucking her thumb. Meredith reclined a bit more in the bed and rubbed the baby's back, hoping she would fall asleep. After a few minutes, Laura dozed off slightly, and Meredith looked to Derek. He nodded slightly, signaling for Meredith to carry the little girl across the hall to her crib.

They went into Izzie's room, laid Laura down, and tucked her in under the soft pink blanket before silently exiting the room and closing the door. However, as soon as they made their way back into their own bed, they heard Laura crying on the baby monitor.

"I think she might be teething. It's probably hurting her. Either that or she just wants to be with us", Meredith said as Derek kissed her cheek and left to go get the baby from her crib.

"Does this mean no sex?", he asked as he walked out the door.

Meredith shook her head. "No sex."

"Babies...they're a real deal breaker", he joked.

"Go get her", Meredith laughed, dropping her head back onto her pillow.

Laura had been such a good sleeper the past few days that they thought they'd have no problem getting her to sleep tonight, but it looked like it may be one of those nights. Neither of them minded though. They cared about their little niece and would spend the whole night making sure she was okay. Because they loved her.

**I really wanted Addison and Meredith to be in a good place. Addison is coming to their wedding, and it's important that they talk before the actual wedding day, don't you think? :P**

**This chapter was originally longer, but it was getting way too long so I decided to split it into two. The next chapter is the last Laura chapter. Hope you guys are still enjoying the story so far. I have lots of fun writing it.**

**Reviews make my day!**


	27. Chocolate Cake

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. I just wish I did.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate each and every one of them. **

After Derek brought Laura back into the room, they tried to find out what was bothering the little girl, so they could get her back to sleep.

"Sweetie, do your teeth hurt?", Meredith asked softly as Derek hold the whimpering baby in his arms.

"Teef", Laura mumbled, burying her face into Derek's chest.

Meredith peeled back the blanket and got up out of bed. "I'll go get her a teething ring from the freezer."

"Get her little blanket out of the crib too", Derek said softly, substituting his finger for a teething ring until Meredith returned.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, making her way out of the room and down the hall.

"Shh… it's okay. It's okay", Derek soothed. He leaned over as best he could while holding Laura, his finger in her mouth, and grabbed a tissue off Meredith's nightstand so he could wipe off her little tear covered face.

"You're alright, Princess", Derek said softly, gently brushing the tissue over her wet cheeks.

Meredith walked back into the room with a teething ring and the blanket. "How is she?", she asked, getting back into bed.

"She's still upset", Derek sighed sadly. He didn't mind being up with the baby, he just didn't like to see her in pain.

"Here. Try this", Meredith said, handing Derek an orange teething ring. "This should help you, pumpkin", she cooed, rubbing Laura's dark blonde hair.

Laura accepted the teething ring and began chewing on it, wincing slightly at the coldness. "No", she cried, letting go of the teething ring.

"Laur, it's going to make you feel better", Derek said softly, trying to give it to her again.

"Deh", she whimpered, reaching for Derek's finger again. Derek smiled and let Laura grab his finger to put back into her mouth.

As soon as his she had Derek's finger tucked away in her mouth, relieving the pain on her gums, her crying ceased. Laura sighed softly and laid her head on Derek's chest.

Meredith put the teething ring on her nightstand and looked at Derek, kissing his cheek softly. "You're a miracle worker."

"All part of my charm", he joked, holding Laura in place while he lay down in the bed with his head against the pillow. Laura stretched out on Derek's chest and stomach, turning her head to face Meredith, her eyes still big green orbs slightly glossed over with unshed tears.

"You're okay", Meredith said with a smile, caressing the baby's cheek.

Laura spread out her little fingers and laid her palm on top of Derek's hand to make sure he kept his finger in place. Meredith laid the little pink blanket over top of Laura's back and kissed her forehead.

"Do you want Uncle Derek to tell you a story?", Meredith asked with a slight giggle. Laura nodded and smiled slightly, enjoying the peaceful lull of Derek's breathing.

Derek turned his head and looked at her. "You want me to make one up?", he laughed.

"I thought that would qualify as part of your charm", Meredith smirked, snuggling closer to her fiancé and her niece.

"Fine", Derek chuckled, leaning over to kiss the top of Meredith's head. "I'll make up a story."

"Get ready for the corniest story you'll ever hear, Laur", Meredith giggled as she began rubbing Laura's back.

Derek looked at her and smirked. "Hey."

"Fine. Sorry", she said, unable to hide the smile on her face.

"Okay…once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess named Meredith…", he began.

Meredith sighed out loud. "Here we go…"

"Can you stop interrupting please?", Derek asked with a chuckle. "Laura wants to hear the story."

"Fine, go on", Meredith smiled, pulling the blanket up over herself.

"Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess named Meredith. She moved back to the land of Seattle from Boston where she spent her childhood…to begin her ye old internship—"

Meredith laughed. "Ye old internship?"

"Yes, to begin her ye old internship at Seattle Grace Hospital. The night before she began her new job, the fair princess decided to go have a few shots of…apple juice… at the bar. She was wearing a beautiful black dress that—the princess, she looked hot. She was approached by a handsome stranger in a good looking, red shirt who not so subtly flirted with her. After a few drinks and a few laughs, they decided to leave the bar together…"

Meredith eyed Derek and shook her head. "This little fairy tale is already getting sick and twisted. Can you at least keep it G-rated."

"Do you honestly think I'd corrupt this beautiful little girl?", Derek asked with a laugh, shifting Laura slightly to make her more comfortable on his chest.

"Hmm…no. But if it was just me in here with you, I'm sure it would turn p-o-r-n-y", she giggled.

Derek laughed and kissed the top of her head. "I'll tell you the adult version of this story tomorrow", he teased.

"Fine", she said with a small smile. "Now continue…I'm curious to see where you're going with this."

"Okay. So Princess Meredith and her nameless prince went back to the royal house and kissed…a lot. Before they knew it, Meredith's fancy black dress was...not on her anymore, nor was the handsome stranger's good looking shirt."

Meredith looked at him amusedly as she waited for him to continue. She knew what came next in the story, and wanted to know how he would baby-censor it.

"Meredith and her prince spent the night…having…", he said slowly, looking to Meredith for help.

"Cake. Lots of chocolate cake", Meredith said with a nod.

"It was some very good chocolate cake", Derek said with a smirk, glancing to Meredith.

Meredith giggled. "It was."

"So the next morning, Princess Meredith found out that the mystery man's name was Derek. She kicked Derek out of the royal house so she could take a shower and get ready for work", he said softly before continuing.

"Ready for this, Laur? This is a good part", Derek chuckled. Laura smiled slightly at Meredith, her eyelids becoming heavier as she began to feel better. Derek still kept his finger in the side of her mouth, taking the pressure off of her sore gums.

"As it turns out, the next day, Princess Meredith found out she works with the charming Prince Derek. Derek asked Meredith if he'd like to have some more chocolate cake with her that Friday, but the fair Meredith turned him down, claiming he'd taken advantage of her the night before. But Prince Derek didn't give up. He courted the Princess until she finally accepted a date with him. Meredith and Derek were falling in love", he said softly, leaning over to kiss Meredith's temple.

"Then…some things happened that I'd rather not get into…", he sighed.

Meredith kissed his cheek, silently encouraging him to skip over the not so nice memories of the past and jump to the happiness. This was a fairy tale after all.

Derek cleared his throat and went on. "Then came the night of the royal ball…"

"Royal ball?", Meredith asked confusedly. By this time, Laura was well on her way to falling asleep, but Meredith was interested to see where Derek went with this strange little story.

"Royal ball...a prom…same thing", he chuckled. Meredith put her tongue in her cheek and looked at him amusedly.

"Without getting into specifics, Princess Meredith lost her royal panties that night…", he said, attempting to stifle a laugh as to not disturb the baby.

"Derek", Meredith hissed.

"It's part of our story", Derek said simply. "Anyway…the next night Prince Derek declared his love for the beautiful princess." Meredith smiled softly at the memory and cuddled closer to him.

"I'm going to skip around a little bit…you're falling asleep on me and I want to fit in the engagement", he joked, brushing some wispy strands out of Laura's eyes with his spare hand.

"So one night, Meredith and Derek were sitting in this very bed talking about all sorts of things…houses, futures, you know…when all of the sudden, the handsome prince asks the beautiful Meredith to marry him. She of course said yes and the two spent the night having lots of chocolate cake. Eventually, they decided to build a beautiful castle on a hill where they would spend the rest of their lives, raising their own little princesses…"

"Or princes", Meredith giggled, amused by the fact that they weren't even expecting a baby, but somehow Derek knew they'd be having girls when they decided to start a family.

"Princes and or princesses", Derek corrected, smiling softly.

"Then what happened?", Meredith whispered.

Derek kissed her temple. "And they lived happily ever after."

"How did I know that would be the ending?", Meredith asked with a smirk.

"That's how you end a fairytale", Derek said, smiling slightly. "Even though ours is far from over."

"That was corny…and wrong on so many levels, but somehow, it works", Meredith giggled.

"I'll take that as a compliment, so thank you", he chuckled.

Meredith looked at Derek and Laura, who was now sleeping peacefully on his chest. "I think your story did the trick. She's asleep", Meredith said with a smile.

"Well now we know to use that story when we have our own", he grinned.

"I love you", Meredith whispered, leaning over Laura to kiss Derek softly.

Derek smiled against her lips. "I love you too."

"So what are we going to do about her?", she asked, pointing to the sleeping baby on top of him.

"She can just stay like this. I don't want to risk waking her up", he said softly.

"Is it okay if she's in here with us?"

Derek nodded. "She's our niece, and we're taking care of her. Besides, she still has my finger hostage in her mouth, and I'm not leaning over the crib all night."

"Are you comfy enough?", Meredith asked.

"Yeah, I'm good", he said softly.

Meredith looked over at the digital clock on her nightstand. "It's 9:00. Are we just calling it a night?"

"I don't think we have a choice. Well, I don't. You're free to go if you'd like…", he said with a chuckle.

"I'm good right here", she whispered. She propped herself up on her elbow and kissed Laura's cheek before kissing Derek again. "I love you."

"I love you, too", he whispered back. Meredith cuddled her body close to his and pulled the blanket over them. It wasn't long before the three of them were all sleeping soundly, completely content and happy.

--

Meredith woke up the next morning to find Laura still sleeping on Derek's chest. Somewhere over the course of the night, Laura's little thumb had replaced Derek's finger and she was making soft sucking sounds with her mouth. Derek rested one of his hands gently on Laura's back, and had the other arm holding Meredith close.

It was something Meredith would never forget. Laura looked so peaceful as she slept on top of him, knowing that her Uncle Derek was keeping her safe and warm. She had never seen this side of Derek before. He had always been so loving toward Meredith, but seeing him show such affection for his little niece was something that brought tears to her eyes. She knew that he'd make a beautiful father one day; the kind of father that was protective and nurturing, and who would hold their own children in the same way.

Meredith kissed his stubble covered cheek. "I love you, Derek", she whispered almost inaudibly.

"Hmm…", Derek sighed softly, opening his eyes and adjusting to the light that was pouring into the room.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep", she said softly.

Derek looked over at her and smiled. "I was already sort of awake. She was moving a little bit and woke me up", he chuckled.

"When did she let go of your finger?", Meredith asked with a soft giggle.

"A few hours ago. I didn't want to put her in the crib though. She looked so peaceful…", he explained, kissing Meredith's forehead.

"I think she just wanted to spend her last night here with us", Meredith said with a smile.

Derek smiled back at her. "I think you're probably right."

"I sucked my thumb too", Meredith mentioned softly, admiring the sleeping baby.

"You did?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. Up until I was seven or eight. Did you?"

"Nope. Nancy and Amy did though. And Mark."

"I can't see Mark or Nancy sucking their thumbs", Meredith said incredulously.

"Yep. And feel free to use that as blackmail by the way", he joked.

"I'll be sure to do that", Meredith giggled.

Laura's eyelids fluttered open and her green eyes looked to Meredith. "Good morning, Laura", Meredith said softly, rubbing Laura's arm with her finger.

Laura stretched out on Derek's abdomen before yawning and attempting to sit up. Derek scooped the baby up in his arms and sat up, wincing slightly at the pain he felt from lying on his back all night. "Morning, Princess", he said with a smile, propping her up in his arms.

"Lub Deh", Laura said softly, giving Derek a kiss on the cheek before leaning over to kiss Meredith's cheek as well. "Lub Meh."

Meredith felt her eyes sting with tears. Their little niece had just told them she loves them. It was so sweet and innocent, and they found themselves even more in love with the little girl. Meredith kissed Laura's soft little cheek. "We love you too, sweet pea."

Laura reached out for her aunt and Meredith accepted the baby into her open arms. "Do we really have to give her back today?", Meredith frowned.

"She'll be back", Derek said with a smile. "Won't you?"

Laura nodded slightly and smiled. "Back."

Derek tickled her belly. "See, I knew it", he chuckled.

"You better come back and visit us. We love your visits", Meredith giggled, kissing the top of Laura's head.

"We still have few hours until she leaves. How about we get dressed then go out to breakfast, then to the toy store or something? Does that sound like fun, Laur?", Derek asked excitedly.

Laura clapped her hands and giggled. "Toy!", she said happily.

"Okay then, let's get ready", he laughed. Laura would be going back home in a few hours, and they wanted to make the most of the time they had left with her.

--

After getting dressed, the three went out to breakfast at a little café before taking the short drive to the toy store. Meredith and Derek would have gotten Laura anything and everything she wanted, but the only thing that caught her eye was a soft cotton little baby doll in a pink dress.

"Ba", she said with a smile, pointing to the little doll on the shelf.

"You want this baby, Laur?", Meredith asked, walking over to get the doll for her to see.

Laura nodded enthusiastically, opting to be held by Derek rather than to sit in the cart.

"Okay then. She's yours", Derek laughed, bouncing Laura slightly in his arms as she admired the doll Meredith was holding for her.

They walked up and down every aisle, letting Laura look at all of the toys. But still, the only one she wanted was the baby doll she had chosen.

"Do you just want your doll baby?", Meredith asked her.

Laura nodded. "Ba", she pointed, smiling at her new doll.

"You're a cheap date, Laur. The guys are gonna love you", Derek joked as they made their way to the registers to pay for the toy.

As soon as they got in the car, Meredith opened the box containing the doll and handed it to Laura. "Here you go, sweet pea", she said happily.

"Ba", Laura squealed, hugging the baby doll close to her chest.

"You like your baby, Laur?", Derek asked with a smile.

"Pitty", Laura beamed, staring at her new dolly.

Meredith giggled. "Your baby is very pretty."

"What's her name, Laur?", Derek asked as they made their way back to the house.

"Meh", Laura said with a smile.

Derek chuckled. "Your baby's name is Meredith?"

"Ba Meh", Laura said, pointing to her doll.

Meredith laughed, turning around to the backseat and tickling Laura's belly.

Laura squealed in delight and cuddled her baby doll close to her. Derek took Meredith's hand and squeezed it gently. "I'm going to miss her, Derek", Meredith said with a small smile.

"We're the involved aunt and uncle now. I'm sure we'll see her again soon", Derek said comfortingly.

"I hope so", Meredith said softly, turning back to look at the little girl. She was clutching her doll in the crook of her arm while she sucked her thumb, staring out the window with a contented smile on her face.

--

When they got home, they packed up all of Laura's things and put them by the entryway of the house. Eric, Molly, and Lexie would be arriving soon to pick her up, and they wanted to be ready for them.

"Meh", Laura said happily, pointing to the doll in her hand as she, Meredith, and Derek sat on the soft rug of the living room floor.

"Well, I'm flattered, Laura. Thank you", Meredith giggled. Laura stood up on her feet and toddled the few steps over to where Meredith was to sit on her lap.

"Meh ba?", Laura asked, pointing to Meredith's belly.

Meredith giggled softly and looked over at Derek. "No. Aunt Meredith isn't having a baby. One day though."

"Lub ba", Laura whispered, kissing Meredith's flat, baby-less stomach.

Derek kissed Meredith's cheek. "This'll be all over the hospital before you know it…", he said with a chuckle.

"The gossip of our non-existent baby?", she asked with a giggle.

"Laura seems very gossipy. Aren't you Laura?", he joked, tickling the bottom of Laura's socked foot.

Laura nodded and smiled before reaching her arm up to play with Meredith's hair. "Do you like my hair?", Meredith asked amusedly.

"Pitty", Laura said softly.

"Aunt Meredith's hair is very pretty", Derek smiled, kissing the side of Meredith's head.

Eventually, they heard a knock on the door, signaling the arrival of Laura's family coming to pick her up. "I'll get it", Derek offered, hopping up and walking to the entryway to answer the door. Derek led them 

into the living room where Meredith was sitting with the baby. Laura looked up at them with wide eyes. "Ma! Da! Leth!", she squealed happily.

Meredith scooped Laura and her doll up into her arms and handed Laura over to Lexie. "Hey Laur! Did you have fun with Aunt Meredith and Uncle Derek?", Lexie asked excitedly.

Laura nodded and smiled. "Ba", she said happily, showing off her doll to all of them.

"They got you a dolly? That was so nice of them. Did you say thank you?", Molly asked, kissing her daughter's cheek.

"It was no problem", Derek said with a smile. "We loved having her here. Both of us fell in love with her. We didn't want to give her up."

"We really appreciate it", Eric said genuinely. "It's nice to have family we can count on to take care of her for us."

"She was great", Meredith said with a soft smile. "We loved every minute of it."

They spent the next few minutes chatting about their little vacation to Spokane, and some of the things Meredith and Derek did with Laura. But Meredith could only avoid the inevitable for so long.

"So how is…Thatcher doing?", she asked softly.

Lexie smiled. "He's doing a lot better. He's getting back to being healthy again. He's had some counseling, and it's seems to be helping a lot with the grief. Actually, they think he'll be good to go in a couple months."

"Oh, that's good", Meredith said softly. "I'm glad."

"We talked about him moving into an apartment. That house is just too much for him to manage on his own. And his counselors told us there's probably too many memories there of…our mom…and that he might revert back to the drinking if he were to stay there. They said an apartment will give him a fresh start…", Lexie explained, trying to sound optimistic though the mention of Susan obviously upset her.

"Fresh starts are good", Derek agreed with a nod. "I think that'll be for the best."

"We think so, too", Molly said with a smile. "Actually, Eric and I are thinking about moving into the house. We want to be closer to the family. Eric is taking a new position at work that prevents him from being sent overseas for at least the next few years. There's a lot of reasons why it'd be good for us."

Meredith smiled. "Oh, well, good."

"Meh", Laura interrupted, reaching out for her other aunt while holding her dolly in her hand.

Lexie laughed and handed Laura off to Meredith. "Hey, sweet pea", Meredith said with a smile, kissing Laura's cheek. "I am going to miss you so much."

"She seems so attached to you guys", Molly said with a pleasantly shocked smile.

"Believe me, we're just as attached to her", Derek laughed.

"Well now that we're moving closer, you're more than welcome to babysit whenever you'd like", Eric said with a nod.

"Oh we'd love to", Meredith said happily. "She's the sweetest little girl we've ever met."

"We want you guys to be involved in her life…in all of our lives. We'd really like to give this whole family thing a try", Molly said softly, watching as her daughter laid her head on Meredith's shoulder. "It's just that…Eric's family lives out in Wisconsin, so we don't get to see them much. And you two are really the only family living close by", Molly explained, taking her husband's hand.

_Family_. The word scared her. Her last attempt at having a family left her feeling even more alone than when she was family-less. But now, after spending the past two days with her little niece, the idea of having a family suddenly seemed okay, great even. She knew that she'd always have Derek, and Cristina, and her hospital family, but to have an actual family connection with two sisters, a brother-in-law, and a little niece she adored was something she wanted. And she knew Susan would have wanted it too.

"Yeah", Meredith said softly, a slight smile on her face. "We'd really like that."

"Yeah?", Lexie asked, her voice filled with hope.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

"Besides, we don't think we could go without seeing her again for more than a week", Derek laughed, tickling Laura's belly. Meredith silently thanked him for attempting to lighten the conversation by taking his hand and squeezing it gently.

"We don't get much time off, but when we do sometime…we'd really like to take her out to the park or whatever. We really loved spending time with her", Meredith said with a smile.

Molly nodded. "That would be great. She seems to love you guys."

"We love her too." Derek grinned. "Don't we, Laur?"

"Lub", Laura giggled, patting her cheeks. Meredith and Derek leaned in as they always did and kissed Laura's soft little cheeks. The baby squealed in delight and cuddled her doll close to her.

Lexie beamed at her niece. "She doesn't do that for just anyone, you know."

"So we're part of the special few, huh?", Derek asked with a chuckle.

"Yes you are", Eric laughed.

"She's very intelligent—talking the whole time. She understands what you're talking about. You're raising a very bright little girl", Derek said, complimenting the baby.

"Thank you", Molly said with a smile, beaming with pride for her daughter.

"She's going to be a doctor like Aunt Lexie. Aren't you Laur?", Lexie asked.

Laura nodded and smiled as she played with Meredith's shirt.

"Do you want to tell Aunt Meredith and Uncle Derek bye byes?", Molly asked her daughter.

"Lub Deh", Laura said, leaning over in Meredith's arms to give him a kiss on the cheek just as they had done to her. She then placed a kiss on Meredith's cheek. "Lub Meh."

Meredith hugged the baby close to her and kissed her forehead. "We love you too, Laura."

--

After the four of them said their goodbyes, Meredith and Derek were left sitting on the couch with nothing to do.

"I'm bored", Meredith pouted.

Derek laughed and kissed the top of her head. "Me too."

"So I think it's good…it's good that they're moving into my father's house", Meredith said softly.

"So do I", Derek nodded before speaking again. He knew any mention of her father was delicate territory, but he knew she was thinking about it. "I'm glad Thatcher is doing okay."

"Yeah…so am I", she said quietly.

"Hey, you okay?", he asked, taking her hands in his own.

Meredith nodded. "I'm okay. This is…it's a good thing, Derek. I want to have a family. And I just…this is good, right?"

"It is", he agreed with a nod.

"It's just that…I don't have the best track record when it comes to this sort of thing."

Derek offered her a soft, comforting smile. "That doesn't mean you don't deserve a family. And you know you will always have me, but Meredith, this is good. And Lexie and Molly…they're not like your father. Susan would want you to have sisters. She loved you, and she'd want you to have a family."

"I love you, Derek", she whispered, putting her hand on his chest. She tilted her head up and gave him a passionate, tender kiss.

Derek rested his forehead against hers when they broke the kiss. "I love you, too."

"You know what I'm in the mood for?", she asked with a giggle.

"Hmm?"

"Some chocolate cake", she said, running her fingers through his thick, dark curls.

Derek looked at her confusedly. "Chocolate cake?"

"Yeah. You know…like the kind Princess Meredith and her handsome stranger had in your fairy tale", she said with a smile.

"Oh. That kind of chocolate cake…", he grinned, leaning in to nibble on her earlobe.

"Mmhmm", she sighed.

"I'd love to have some chocolate cake with you", he laughed; his breath making the hair on her neck stand on end. "I'd like to have chocolate cake with you for the rest of our little vacation."

Meredith tipped her head back to give him better access. "I'd like that too."

"Let's go then", he said, scooping her up into his arms and proceeding to carry her up the stairs.

Meredith looped her arms around his neck. "I really could go for some chocolate cake though", she giggled.

"We can make one later", he laughed, gently dropping her onto the bed.

Meredith pulled him down on top of her. "Okay", she whispered. "Love you."

"I love you too, Meredith."

The two spent the remainder of the day making love, just enjoying the rare time off and spending it together. All in all, their little vacation had been a success. They loved Laura and babysitting her had been an absolute joy, and they looked forward to being involved in her life. And of course, the newfound family she had gained through the little girl was something for which Meredith was extremely grateful.

Family may not be so bad after all.

**Reviews make my day.**


	28. Getting a Chance

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them.**

Derek looked at his watch. 5:32. "We're gonna be late, Mer", Derek called up the stairs. Meredith's car was still at the auto shop, so they had to drive into work together, which wasn't a problem, except that Meredith seemed to forget that Derek had a surgery scheduled for 6:30 that morning.

"I'm coming", she called back. He could hear her scurrying along upstairs, attempting to finish her morning preparations.

Derek stood at the bottom of the stairs holding his own bag, both of their coffees, and his keys. He looked at his watch again. 5:40. He was about to call for her again when he saw her making the descent down the stairs while pulling her hair back into a messy ponytail.

"Sorry", she said apologetically as Derek handed her the coffee. She grabbed her tote bag off the hook and slipped on her tennis shoes. "I'm ready."

He offered her a small smile. "Okay." He put his hand on the small of her back and led them out the front door, locking it behind him.

The two drove to work in a comfortable silence, occasionally changing the radio stations from a commercial to a song. "So Cristina and I were going to go to Joe's tonight with the others for a drink. Did you want to come?", she asked.

"Nah, that's okay. You go have fun with your friends", he said with a smile, resting his hand on her thigh.

"I need to borrow your car though. Or else I won't have a way home", she yawned.

Derek nodded. "That's fine. I'll have Mark drive me home."

"We won't be gone long. I have an early surgery tomorrow morning", Meredith explained, yawning again.

"Okay", he said with a smile as they pulled into the employee parking lot.

The two walked hand in hand to the entrance of the hospital. "If you get stuck in the pit, come find me. I'll let you scrub in on something", Derek said as they stepped onto the elevator.

Meredith looked over at him and smiled. "Thank you, Dr. Shepherd."

"You're welcome, Dr. Grey", he chuckled. After the elevator doors opened, they stepped off and walked down to the nurses' station where they would go their separate ways for the day.

"I love you", she said softly, giving him a quick kiss.

Derek smiled. "Love you too. I'll come find you at lunch."

"Okay", Meredith grinned as they began walking in opposite directions, ready to begin their days at work.

--

After Meredith finished rounding on her patients that morning, Lexie approached her in the hall. "Hey Meredith."

Meredith looked over at Lexie and smiled. "Hey Lexie. Is everything okay?", she asked, pulling a pen out of her pocket to take down some notes at the nurses' station.

"Yeah", Lexie nodded, pushing some hair behind her ear. "Molly tells me Laura keeps talking about you and Dr. Shepherd", she laughed.

Meredith smiled. "We miss her."

"I think she misses you guys too", Lexie agreed with a laugh. "Actually, I um…I wanted to talk to you about something. Do you have a minute?", she asked nervously.

Meredith eyed her half-sister curiously. "Yeah. Why? Is everything…?"

"Could we um…", Lexie started, noticing some of the nurses pretending not to listen in on their conversation. It seemed that any news concerning Grey women was a hot topic for hospital gossip, and Lexie didn't want this getting spread around the rumor mill.

"Oh. Yeah", Meredith nodded in understanding.

Lexie and Meredith walked into an empty corridor where no one could overhear their conversation. Meredith swallowed and played with her fingers, waiting for Lexie to begin speaking.

"So um…when we visited my—our dad—in the rehab clinic, he um…he was asking to see you", Lexie stammered nervously.

"Oh", was all Meredith could muster. Of all the things Lexie could have said, that certainly wasn't what she was expecting.

"We um…we told him that you were babysitting Laura, and he just…he wants to see you, Meredith", Lexie breathed.

"Oh. I um…", Meredith started, biting her lip to find something plausible to say.

"He really is…different. He wasn't just saying that because he was all weepy and feeling guilty. He really does—he'd like to see you", Lexie said softly.

Meredith nodded slowly, unable to find the words to form a sentence.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you the other day. You guys just seemed so happy, and I didn't want to ruin that, but standing here telling you this while you look at me like that…I just—I'm sorry. I'll just go", Lexie rambled, turning on her heel to hurry off down the hall.

Meredith smiled a little bit at the rambling that both of them seemed to have inherited. "Lexie", she called out.

Lexie turned around and looked to Meredith, an embarrassed look on her face.

"Look…", Meredith breathed. "My father and I don't have the easiest…it's just that…I'll think about it, okay?", she said softly.

Lexie smiled a little, a look of relief written over her features. "Thank you, Meredith", she whispered.

"You're welcome", she said with a nod. "Okay, well, I have to go prep my patient for surgery. I'll um…I'll see you later, okay?'

"Okay", Lexie smiled. "See you later, Meredith."

"See you Lexie", Meredith said kindly.

Meredith took a deep breath and headed down the hall in the opposite direction of her younger sister. She silently thanked God that she could escape in surgery right now. Dealing with the prospect of seeing her father for the first time in months was too much to think about right now.

--

"Hey you. How was your surgery?", Derek asked, taking a seat next to her at a table in the cafeteria.

Meredith looked up from her salad. "Hmm? Oh. It was good…fine", she said distractedly.

Derek could tell by her demeanor that something was on her mind. He kissed her cheek softly and smiled. "What's wrong?"

"How do you do that?", she asked quietly.

"Do what?", he asked, taking a bite of his own salad.

Meredith leaned back in her chair and took a sip of her water. "That. You have this annoying way of reading my mind", she breathed.

"I know you", he said simply. "So what's up?"

Meredith gave in. She knew talking to him would make her feel better, so she decided to spill. "Lexie and I were talking today and—", she began before the beeping of her pager sounded.

"Damn it. I am hungry", she groaned, as if scolding her little black pager. "My post-op patient. I have to go." Meredith kissed his cheek and stood up. "I'll talk to you tonight, okay?"

Derek sighed. "Okay. Love you."

"Love you too", she said with a sad smile before hurrying out of the cafeteria to go check on her patient.

--

After Meredith's shift was over at eight o'clock, she changed out of her scrubs and into her clothes. Her day had been one page after another. She hadn't even had a chance to sit down since lunch time. So she was relieved when it was time to go out and get a drink with her friends.

"I'll have a shot of tequila, Joe", Meredith said as she, Cristina, Alex, and George took their seats around the bar. Izzie and Lexie were on-call or else they would have joined them.

Cristina looked at her curiously. "You haven't had tequila in months."

"Tonight I feel like drinking", Meredith shrugged.

"Bad day?", Joe asked as he poured a shot and slid it over to her.

"Just…family things", Meredith explained, downing the shot. She winced at the burn of the alcohol as it slid down her throat.

"You okay?", George asked worriedly.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I'm fine."

"Here we go…", Alex laughed, taking a sip of his own beer.

"What?", Meredith asked, looking to the three friends who were staring at her.

"Is it a Derek thing?", Cristina asked.

"No", Meredith shook her head. "It's not a Derek thing. Really, I'm good", she said, putting on her best fake smile.

The truth was, Meredith had been thinking about meeting Thatcher all day. Part of her wanted to go. She wanted to make peace with him, not only for her own sake, but for Susan. Susan would want Meredith and Thatcher to make peace. Maybe they would never be as close as she'd once hoped, but if they could at least find some common ground, they'd both be better off.

She could talk to her friends about it. They'd be supportive and offer their advice. But the person she most wanted to talk to was Derek. He always knew what to say to make her feel better. She knew he'd be there every step of the way and be supportive of whatever she chose to do.

But right now, she was out with her friends. She wasn't on call. And she wanted to drink. Right now, she wanted to pretend she didn't have daddy problems, and be like everyone else. She reasoned that her well established issues with her father would still be there no matter what she did. Her goal wasn't to get drunk, but to have a good time with her friends.

--

Back at the house, Derek was still worrying about her. He knew she was out having fun at the bar with her friends, but he also knew something was bothering her. He knew from the minute he saw her in the cafeteria that something was off. He just hoped she'd turn to him for advice instead of relying on José to help her deal with things.

He was getting bored sitting on the couch watching TV, so he thought about calling up Mark so the two could go out for a drink. But then he remembered that Mark was having the new OB over for dinner at his apartment. And because Meredith had his car, that pretty much threw a wrench in his plans.

When midnight rolled around, he began to get a little worried. He wasn't being possessive, and knew she was an adult, but she'd been at Joe's for close to four hours, and he wanted to make sure she was okay. He tried her cell a few times, but there was no answer. He hoped she wasn't passed out on top of the bar in a drunken stupor. That side of Meredith, though sometimes entertaining, wasn't something he liked to see when she was upset about something. To make matters worse, he didn't have his car so he couldn't go make sure she was alright.

Around 12:30, Meredith and Alex walked into the house laughing and chatting.

"Hey", Meredith said with a smile as she walked into her bathroom to brush her teeth.

Derek breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn't drunk or passed out, which was a good sign.

"Hey", Derek smiled, sitting up in the bed and tossing his the home furnishings catalog onto the nightstand.

"Alex drove us home in your car", she said with a mouth full of toothpaste.

"Oh. Okay", Derek said with a nod, noticing her obvious happy demeanor, a complete change from this morning. "Have fun?"

Meredith rinsed her mouth out with some water and walked back into the bedroom. "Yeah, I did."

"Good", Derek said with a smile. He contemplated letting it go until tomorrow, but wanted to make sure she was okay. "So…did you want to talk?"

"About what?", she asked as she changed into some pajamas.

"Today at lunch, you were telling me about something Lexie said, then your pager went off. I know something is bothering you", he said softly, hoping she'd talk to him.

Meredith shrugged. "It's nothing. I'm fine."

"So we're back to that again…", he sighed sadly.

"What are you talking about?", she asked as she got into bed next to him.

"You're not fine, Meredith. I know you better than anyone else. And you…are not fine", he said, shaking his head.

"Derek, I'm happy right now. Can we talk about this later?", she asked, taking out her ponytail and dropping her hair tie onto her nightstand.

"Yeah. Fine", he mumbled, lying down in bed with his back to her.

Meredith looked at him curiously. "Why are you pissed off at me?"

"I'm not", he snapped.

"What is your problem?", she asked, sitting up in the bed.

"Nothing. I'm just tired", he sighed.

"You could have gone to bed while I was out", she said, getting defensive.

"You were at the bar for four hours. I wanted to make sure you got home okay."

Meredith crossed her arms. "You don't have to wait up for me. I'm a big girl, Derek."

"Well what am I supposed to think when you're at the bar for four hours and don't even bother to call?", he asked, turning around to face her.

"Sorry. I didn't know I had to check in", she said sarcastically.

"You don't have to check in. I was just worried about you. I know something is bothering you, and when you go to the bar for four hours, I can't help but wonder what's going on", he explained.

"I'm fine, Derek. I'm home. I'm not drunk. And I want to go to bed", she said dryly, lying down and facing the opposite direction of him.

"Fine. Goodnight, Meredith", he sighed, lying back down so they were back to back.

"Night", she mumbled.

He heard her crying softly next to him, attempting to muffle her sobs in her pillow.

Derek felt a twinge of pain in his heart. "Meredith", he sighed sadly, turning around to pull her close to him.

Meredith went stiff in his arms and sat up in bed, quickly wiping away her tears. "I'm sleeping in Izzie's room. Goodnight", she said quietly. She grabbed her pillow off her bed, and walked out of her room and across the hall, thankful that Izzie was on-call tonight.

Derek sat in the bed for a moment with his head in his hands. All he wanted to do was talk to her. He never meant to pick a fight with her. And now she was angry, and upset, and they didn't even get a chance to talk.

He let her have a few minutes by herself in Izzie's room before walking across the hall. As soon as she heard his footsteps, she pulled the covers over her head. "I'm fine, Derek. Go back to bed."

"Meredith", he whispered, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

"Stop. Stop trying to make me feel better. I'm sorry I didn't call. I'm sorry I make you worry", she whimpered, trying her best to sound strong.

"_I'm_ sorry", he whispered. "I shouldn't have been short with you. I just—Meredith, when I know something is bothering you, I want to help. You were distracted today at lunch and it looked like you were going to cry. I don't want it to be that way."

"It's not a big deal. I shouldn't even be upset about it. I'm just stressing and—I don't need you to help me with this, Derek", she said with a sniffle.

Derek took a deep breath, laying down on the bed next to her, but keeping enough distance that she wouldn't flinch away from him. "What did Lexie say to you?"

"Nothing. It's not fair to you, Derek. I just—I rely on you too much. I'm always coming to you with my crap, and I shouldn't do that", she whispered, still facing away from him.

Derek felt the tears sting his eyes. He knew she had been dealing with a lot lately. Finally putting her mother to rest, learning how to have a family, learning how to let him in—it was a lot for her. But that didn't mean he wanted her to deal with it on her own. "Meredith, I don't ever want you to think you can't come to me. I love you and I want to help", he said sadly.

They both remained silent for a few minutes. Derek didn't want to force her to say anything. He hoped she'd just come out and say it on her own. He thought about going back to her room so she could get some sleep without him next to her, but he just couldn't bring himself to leave her side.

After what seemed like forever, Meredith finally spoke. "This was my room when I was little", she admitted softly.

Derek looked over at her, most of her body still obscured by the blanket. "Yeah?"

"Yeah", she sniffled. "My dad painted it. It's been this color since I was born. Izzie touched it up, but it's still the same color. My mom didn't want to go all pink", she said softly before pausing. "Actually, my mom didn't even want to have a baby at all. But my dad…he told me that he decorated this room for a month because he wanted it to be perfect. They settled on this cream yellow shade. He wanted to make it special for me. He always told me that this was my princess room…"

Derek smiled softly, a few tears escaping his eyes. He suddenly knew that whatever was bothering her concerned her father. "Yeah?"

Meredith sniffled, still refusing to face him. "He would sit in here with me and have tea parties. Or we would color. He would tuck me in every night. When he left…I just…" She paused and began shaking again, her body wracked with heavy sobs.

"Meredith", he whispered. He knew she was still upset with him, but he didn't care. He wrapped his arm around her and kissed the back of her head.

"He left. He left, Derek", Meredith cried. "He didn't even…he just left."

"I know. I know. I'm sorry", he whispered, taking her hand in his own.

"How could he do that? How could he just leave me with her? He knew what she was like. He knew what kind of childhood I'd have. But still…he left. And now…now he wants me to go see him", she admitted sadly through her tears. "I don't know if I can do that. I tried before…I tried to make it work. I wanted to see if I could let him back into my life. But then Susan died. And he hit me, blamed me for her death, and I drove him to become this alcoholic. And Lexie had to—"

He cut her off. "Meredith. You are not to blame for that. You didn't kill Susan. And you're not the reason he's in rehab. He knows that", Derek said firmly. "None of this is your fault. I know you blame yourself, but Meredith, everything that's happened—it's not your fault. You were the child. And the adults in your life made some admittedly bad decisions, and you were the one who suffered because of it."

"He didn't even fight", she whispered, still facing the wall. "He told me he did…but he didn't. He just left."

Derek rubbed small circles on his hand with his thumb. "I know", he whispered consolingly.

"Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if he would have fought for me. I could have been happy. I could have grown up in a family. I could have…had sisters, birthday parties, holidays…normalcy. But he didn't fight."

"I know. I wish you could have had all of that too", Derek said softly. "It hurts me to think that you went through that. It's not fair."

"Is it wrong that I don't want to see him?"

"No", he said quietly. "I understand."

"But should I?"

"Go see him?", he asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

"If you don't want to, that's okay. But if you do, that's okay too. I love you and I'm behind you either way", he said comfortingly.

Meredith finally turned around to face him; her face tearstained and her eyes still glossed over with tears. "I'm sorry", she whimpered.

"No, Meredith,_ I'm_ sorry. it's—I shouldn't have snapped or been pushy. You had a fun night with your friends and I made you upset. I'm sorry", he whispered, kissing her forehead.

Meredith pressed her body close to his. "I love you."

"I love you too, Meredith", he whispered as he gently rubbed her back.

Meredith buried her face in the crook of his neck and breathed him in, hoping it would comfort her. She needed that right now. She needed to know that he would always be there. Just being with him made her feel better. After a few minutes of relaxing herself, she looked up at him. "I think I should", she whispered.

"See your father?", he asked gently, surprised by the sudden change in her decision.

"I wanted to see him my entire childhood. I just wanted five minutes to talk to him. And I never got that chance when I was little. And now, he wants to see me. I'm getting my chance to make it right. If I don't go, doesn't that make me like him?"

"The situation is…entirely different, Meredith. He's your father, and he left you. He was the parent. You were five years old. If you don't want to go see him, I completely understand, but if you feel like you should see him, I'll be right there next to you—if you want me to", he said gently.

"Yeah", she replied, nodding slightly. "I have to do this for me, but I'll braver if you're there."

"Then I'll come with you. I don't want you doing this alone anyway", he said softly, brushing some hair off her face. "We're in this together."

Meredith smiled slightly. "Okay."

"Come on. Let's go back to bed", he said. Meredith got her pillow and took Derek's hand. They walked back into the bedroom and crawled back under the covers. Derek pulled her close to him and held her as she fell asleep, letting go of the problems of the day. She would face her father, and it would be okay. Because she had Derek. And she knew he'd stand by her every step of the way.

**Reviews make my day. :)**


	29. Small Steps

**Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! I really appreciate each of them.**

Fathers. Like mothers, Meredith had never experienced a true relationship with one, besides Derek's mother. Father was sort of a foreign word to her. Her definition of father was an ass who abandoned his child when she was five year old, seemingly disappearing forever. To her, a father wasn't someone that videotaped your dance recitals and interrogated your boyfriend when they entered your front door. A father left you with your wicked witch of the west-like mother and decided to move on without giving a crap about you.

Since she had decided to visit Thatcher, she had been wavering on her choice. But for some reason, she called the facility last night to let the counselors know that she would be visiting tomorrow after she and Derek rounded on their patients. And now she was kicking herself for being such an idiot. How could she possibly visit him? How could she look him in the eye and not want to run him down in her car. He wasn't an evil man, she knew that. Deep down, he was a good person. But that didn't change the fact that he left her. So needless to say, she had some hesitations about all of this.

Derek assured her that she would be okay. He'd be by her side the entire time. Maybe wanting Derek there made her weak, but she knew that she'd be braver if he was. His presence would calm her and give her the confidence to say what she needed to say. And Meredith had a lot to say.

She had to do this. Not talking to her father wasn't going to help with anything. She needed answers, and she just hope he'd be able to give them. Meredith reasoned that if he wasn't drunk, and the conversation didn't end with another slap across the face, it was already a step in the right direction.

All of this was mulling over in her mind while she was sitting in the passenger seat on her way home from work. Derek noticed her obviously troubled demeanor and put his hand on her thigh.

"Hey. You okay?", he asked softly.

"Hmm…oh, I'm fine", Meredith lied, biting her lip.

Derek sighed. "You're worried about seeing your dad tomorrow."

"How do you know?", she asked.

"Because. I know you", he said with a small smile, taking her left hand in his right. "Don't worry. I'll be with you the whole time."

Meredith nodded. "I know. But I'm still stressing."

"I know", he whispered. "It'll be fine."

"Now you sound like me", Meredith sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Alright, how's this? I'll be awkward and weird, and you'll feel like driving back home before we even get in the building, but you'll feel better afterward", Derek said. "Is that more accurate?"

Meredith smiled slightly. "Thank you", she said, leaning back in her seat.

"You're welcome", he chuckled. "So how about we order in, then take a bath? It'll help you take your mind off things."

"Mmm", Meredith moaned. "That sounds so nice."

"Good", he smiled as they pulled into the driveway. Unless they had plans or were on-call, they came home every night together, which was something they had both come to enjoy.

"So what did you want to order?", he asked as they walked into the house.

Meredith shrugged. "Anything but Chinese."

"Okay, Derek laughed. "Italian?"

"Sounds good", Meredith said with a smile.

After they ordered the food, they went to go relax on the couch. "Why don't you like Chinese food?", Derek asked with a chuckle.

"It always makes me throw up", she shrugged, leaning her head on his chest.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "So you can stomach a left over grilled cheese but can't handle white rice?"

"Is that weird?", she asked with a giggle that made him smile.

"A little…", he smirked.

"You still love me and my quirks", she said, reaching for her hand and lacing their fingers.

Derek smiled. "I do."

--

After they finished eating, they headed upstairs to take a bath. They'd been so busy with work lately, and hadn't taken a bath together in a long time. Getting the chance to relax together in the bathtub would be good for them.

"This'll be nice", Meredith said softly as she tossed her sweater onto the bed.

Derek smiled. "Yeah."

"Don't make me all horny in the tub", she warned.

Derek looked at her and smirked. "I don't know if that's possible, Dr. Grey."

"I'm serious", Meredith giggled.

"You sound serious", Derek teased.

Meredith wiggled out of her jeans. "Remember the last time we tried to have sex in there? We almost got stuck and had to call for help."

"That's because you decided to throw your legs over each side while I—"

"Don't…", she glared. "…ever bring that up again."

Derek smirked at her. "And I thought you were flexible…"

"I am flexible. _That_…was your fault", she said definitively as she unclasped her bra and shimmied out of her panties.

"And when you do _that_, how can I not take advantage in the tub?", he asked, removing the last of his clothing and pulling her into an embrace.

Meredith pressed her lips against his. "Hmm…I don't know…"

"I'm not making any promises", he chuckled, easily scooping her into his arms and carrying her into the bathroom.

Meredith kissed his cheek. "Fine." Derek stepped over the side of the tub and gently set her on her feet. They both sat down and Meredith leaned her head against his chest.

"This is nice", she sighed, playing with some bubbles in her fingers.

"Mmhmm", Derek replied idly as he began to suck on her earlobe.

"What did I say?", she asked quietly, tilting her head so he would have better access to her neck.

Derek reached around and cupped one of her breasts in his hand. "No sex."

"And what are you doing?", she asked in a slight moan.

Derek smirked. "Taking a bath with you."

"No. _You_…are getting me all hot and bothered", she corrected.

"Sorry", he sighed, continuing to give attention to her body.

"No you're not", she giggled.

"Fine. I'm not. But you're not really protesting", he said with a chuckle.

"You're such an—ohh…", she sighed as he snaked his hand between her legs. Meredith spread her knees apart slightly and closed her eyes.

Derek slipped a finger inside of her and she let out a small moan. "Want me to stop?", he whispered, knowing all too well what the answer would be.

"No", she said softly, clutching his thighs when he pushed another finger inside, making sure to stroke the sensitive front wall of her sex. "Oh Der", she moaned. Screw her no tub sex rule. She was too far gone to care about that.

Derek worked his fingers in and out of her at a slow, torturous pace until she was writhing for release. "Der…I…please…", she whimpered, panting slightly.

"Okay", he whispered. He eased his fingers from her and turned her around so she was positioned above him. "I love you."

Meredith settled herself over his erection and sank down, taking him completely into her body. "I love you too", she moaned, bracing her hands on his shoulders so she could raise and lower herself on him. Together they found their rhythm and got lost in their shared passion and pleasure, forgetting about anything but each other.

--

"So much for not making me horny in the tub…", Meredith mused as they lay in bed together. "I'm surprised we actually pulled that off in that size tub."

"We'll have a big bathtub soon", Derek smiled, kissing her forehead. "So did I distract you?"

"You did", Meredith said with a slight giggle. "You're good at that."

"What? Sex?", he questioned, laughing slightly.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yes, sex. But it's not just the sex. It's…you always know how to make me feel better", she said quietly. "And I don't just mean the sex. Even though it's the best I've ever had. It's not about that. It's about…us."

"Best you've ever had, huh?", he asked with a smirk.

"I'm trying to pour my heart out right now and you're ruining it with your porny mind", Meredith scolded. "But if you have to know, yes. You're the best I've ever had."

"You are too", he grinned. "Which is good, because you're stuck with me forever."

Meredith smiled and pressed her palm to his cheek. "Good."

"We got sidetracked. What were you trying to tell me?", Derek asked, brushing some hair off her face.

"It's just…", she sighed, getting lost in her thoughts. She rested her hand on his chest and looked up at him. "You make it…everything…okay. That's why I need you to go tomorrow. I…that might make me weak and pathetic, but I need you there. I need you to let me know that I can do it. That I can talk to him, no matter how much I'm dreading it."

"Mer, you don't have to go. It's okay…if you didn't want to", Derek explained softly, looking into her eyes, so full of trust and love for him.

Meredith sighed. "I do. I mean, I don't. But I should. It might be horrible, but at least I'll know I did it."

"Okay", Derek nodded. "I'll be right there the whole time. And if he really has changed, then I think this'll be as good thing."

"Yeah?", Meredith asked softly. At least one of them was hopeful, because right now, she wasn't so sure.

"Yeah", Derek replied, smiling slightly. "Are you going to tell him about…?", he asked, taking her left hand in his right and pointing to the engagement ring on her finger.

Meredith bit her lip. "I don't know. I guess I should, right?"

"It's up to you. If you didn't want to tell him, that's okay", Derek said comfortingly. He knew that just talking to her father would be hard enough on her, but having to explain to her father that Richard would be walking her down the aisle instead of her own father might add to the headache.

"He really shouldn't expect to walk me down the aisle, right? I mean, that would be…he doesn't think that, right?", Meredith asked, the uncertainly evident in her voice.

"I don't think he expects to, no", Derek answered honestly. "But what are you going to tell him about the wedding? Are you going to invite him or…?"

Meredith shrugged and sighed. "I don't know. I'm not ready for…that. You know?"

"Yeah", Derek nodded understandingly.

"Is it bad that I don't want my own father to come to our wedding?", she asked, tracing the pattern on his tee shirt with her finger.

Derek shook his head slowly. "No. It's not. What he's done to you…is horrible, Meredith. A father should never leave his child. Not on purpose, anyway", he sighed.

Meredith looked at him and saw the sadness in his eyes. "I'm sorry", she whispered, wrapping her arm around his waist. "I know you're thinking about your dad. I don't want to upset you."

"No, that's…I want you to talk. What happened is completely different. My dad didn't leave on his own free will, Meredith", Derek said softly, wrapping his arm around her as well so they were face to face.

"That's why I don't know what I should do. I _have_ a dad. I have a dad and I want nothing to do with him", Meredith explained. "I feel like I'm taking it for granted, you know?"

Derek nodded in understanding. "I know you feel that way. But Meredith, I don't want you to feel like you have to do this just for me. He's said and done terrible things. And I'm not saying he's a bad person, but I understand your hesitation."

"I don't want him to hurt me again", she whispered, pressing her body closer to his. "I don't mean physically. I mean…emotionally", she said before pausing. "Great, now I sound like a loser."

"Mer, you're not a loser", Derek said, shaking his head. "You're nervous about this. Who wouldn't be? It's normal."

"I should have let you be there for me…that night…the night Susan died. I shouldn't have run off. I'm sorry", Meredith said softly.

Derek pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "You don't have to apologize for that. I understand."

"You were trying to help and I didn't let you, the same day I told you I wanted to be better about letting you in. It's just—"

"Meredith", Derek whispered, interrupting her. "When my dad died, I did the same thing. I didn't let anyone talk to me…not my mom, my sisters, not even Mark. I…shut down. It took me a while to get back to being myself. I understand what you went through. Something like that…it's not easy."

"No", Meredith sighed. "It's not."

"That night, I came by the house. I was going to go in, but I didn't want to bother you. I figured you needed some space, so I left", Derek confessed, rubbing small circles on her back with his hand.

Meredith looked up and met his eyes. "You did?"

"Yeah", Derek nodded. "I didn't think you wanted to see me. I just wanted to know if you were okay."

"I'm okay now", Meredith said with a small smile.

Derek returned the smile and kissed her forehead. "And everything will be okay tomorrow."

"I hope so", Meredith said quietly. After a few moments of silence, she spoke. "That day when he came into the ER, I thought that maybe what he said was true. Maybe he really was proud of me."

"He's proud of you, Meredith", Derek said assuredly. "Just because he was drunk, doesn't mean he wasn't being honest. Sometimes people are most honest after a few drinks. They have the courage to say what they're really feeling. Kind of like you on morphine", he said with a chuckle.

Meredith looked at him and smirked before turning serious. "You think so?"

"Yeah", he answered honestly.

"I just can't forget about the slap", Meredith said quietly, staring off somewhere else, not meeting his eyes.

Derek felt his heart start to beat faster. That image would be forever marked in his mind. He would never forget the pain of seeing Meredith so hurt, or the anger coursing through his veins as Thatcher hit his daughter. "Did he hurt you?", he asked softly, gently rubbing her cheek with his thumb as if to take away any of the lingering pain of the slap that happened months ago.

"It just stung for a few minutes. I think I was more in shock than anything else", she confessed softly. "I just splashed some cold water on my face."

"Meredith", Derek sighed sadly, tears pooling in his eyes as he cuddled her closer to him. "I love you so much."

Meredith wiped a tear off his face with her thumb. "Why are you crying?", she asked quietly, a look of concern on her face.

"Because you didn't deserve that. I should have done something. I should have made sure you were okay instead of standing there. I'm sorry, Meredith", he whispered, kissing her forehead.

"I pushed you away. It's not your fault", Meredith comforted.

"I still should have run after you…even if you didn't want to talk. I should have been there for you—with you, taken you home…done something."

Meredith sighed. "I would have been mad if you tried to help…accused you of hovering. We both got off track. It seemed like everything was just spinning out of control and we couldn't stop it…I'm glad those days are over."

"We're okay now", Derek said with a small smile. "No more spinning."

"No more spinning", Meredith whispered in agreement.

"I love you, Meredith", Derek said, taking her hand and kissing each of her fingertips tenderly.

Meredith smiled. "I love you too."

"Sleep?", Derek asked quietly, noticing her tired eyes.

"Sleep", Meredith smiled. She pressed her body up against him and pulled him close to her, needing to feel his presence, his warmth, his love. "Thank you."

"For what?", he asked softly.

"Being here…with me."

Derek kissed her forehead. "There's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be."

--

"I can't do this", Meredith stated nervously as they sat in the car outside of the rehab facility.

Derek quickly took hold of her hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it softly. "Mer, you can. Just take some deep breaths, okay?", he said calmly, taking in a breath and exhaling slowly, wanting her to copy his motions.

Meredith breathed deeply and leaned her head back on the headrest. "I don't know, Derek", she sighed.

"Meredith, look at me", he said softly, soothingly. Meredith turned her head and looked into his blue eyes that she loved. "I. Love. You. And I'm going to be with you the whole time. Doing this—no matter how bad you think it's going to be—it's a good thing. I promise", he assured her, leaning over to kiss her.

"Okay", Meredith breathed, nodding slightly. She knew Derek was right. She knew that doing this, even if she felt like running away waving her banner of avoidance, was something she had to do. She had to do it for Susan. She had to do it for her future. But most importantly, Meredith had to do it for herself. "I'm ready."

Derek smiled softly. "Okay."

The two exited the car and made their way to the entrance. After speaking to the woman at the front desk, they made their way to a cozy looking living room where Thatcher would be expecting them. As they entered the room, Derek gave Meredith's hand a reaffirming squeeze and she squeezed his hand in return.

Thatcher stood up to greet them. "Hello, Meredith. Derek", he said politely, shaking hands with both of them.

Meredith and Derek took their seats on the adjacent couch. Derek took Meredith's hand in his own and laced their fingers, a gesture to let her know that he was there for her.

"How…how have you been?", Thatcher asked nervously.

Meredith smiled slightly. "Good. How about you?"

"I've uh…I'm doing well. It's nice here", Thatcher stammered. Apparently he was just as nervous as Meredith was. Derek's heart ached for Meredith. She and her father could barely strike up a conversation, let alone reconnect.

"That's um—that's good. I'm glad", Meredith replied, looking to Derek for help.

Derek nodded slightly and spoke. "Everybody here seems really nice. Lexie told Meredith that facility is one of the best."

Thatcher nodded. "Yeah—it is. I um…things are better now. For a while there, I was, uh…not—not so good, but things are—it's different now", he said softly.

"Good", Meredith replied, biting her lip. Instead of looking at him, she focused her gaze on some object across the room.

After an awkward moment of silence, Thatcher noticed the ring on Meredith's finger. "Oh! You're—you got engaged?"

"A few months ago", Meredith said with a small smile.

"Congratulations", Thatcher grinned, seeming to beam with pride for his semi-estranged daughter.

Derek smiled. "Thank you."

Almost as if he knew that he wasn't going to be involved with any part of the wedding, he nodded slightly in resignation.

Meredith knew that she shouldn't feel bad. In truth, he didn't deserve to walk her down the aisle, but she couldn't help feel the sting of the pain he was feeling.

"Meredith and I watch Laura recently", Derek began, saving her from any more awkwardness.

She squeezed his hand twice. _Thank. You_. Derek squeezed her hand in return. "She's adorable", Derek grinned.

"They showed me some pictures. She looks so much like you, Meredith", Thatcher said with a genuine smile. "They tell me that she's talking a lot now."

Derek laughed. "Yeah. She's a smart little girl."

"I miss her", Thatcher said softly.

"You'll be going back home soon, right?", Derek asked, keeping up the conversation without Meredith's help. There were things she wanted to say, and yet she couldn't seem to muster up the strength to talk.

"Hopefully within a month or two", Thatcher explained, carefully eyeing his daughter, noticing that she looked troubled.

"Meredith…", he said gently. "Are—are you…alright?"

"Hmm? Oh. Yeah. I'm fine", she lied. "I uh…need to use the bathroom. I'll be right back, okay?"

Derek nodded, knowing that she needed a minute to compose herself. Meredith stood up from the couch and made her way out of the room.

"This isn't easy for her", Derek said softly. "She's really nervous", he explained, leaning back on the couch.

Thatcher smiled sadly. "I can tell. And I know—this—all of this—it's my fault."

"She's trying", Derek sighed.

"Is she…she's happy, right?", Thatcher asked.

"Yeah", Derek smiled. "I think she's happy."

"Thank you—I…thank you", Thatcher said genuinely.

Derek looked at him confusedly. "For what?"

"Loving her. Being there for her. I always wanted her to be happy. I know—I know I wasn't there for her. After I left, I never thought I'd…I prayed that she just—she would find someone who loves her. And I know you do. So…thank you", he said sincerely.

"You're welcome", Derek replied. "I'm sure she'd like to hear that from you, though."

"I don't know…how to talk to her", he confessed, running his fingers through is hair.

"She doesn't know how to talk to you, either", Derek sighed, realizing how lucky he was to have had such a strong relationship with his father, no matter how brief.

Meredith walked back into the room and took her seat next to Derek again. "Sorry, I got lost."

"That's okay", he smiled, taking her hand as he had done before.

"So, Meredith. How are you?" Thatcher asked.

"I'm good. Getting through residency. I love it though" she said enthusiastically, despite her nervousness.

"Good", Thatcher said happily.

For the next hour or so, they managed to make small talk. The awkward tension and inescapable weirdness didn't go away. Meredith breathed a sigh of relief when they finally made their way out of the building.

"That was pointless", she said as she hastily buckled her seatbelt.

Derek looked over at her. "Why do you say that?"

"Because", Meredith sighed. "I didn't say anything. I mean, we said stuff, but none of it—I had things to say to him. Big, important things, Derek. And I didn't say any of them."

"Meredith, that's okay. You haven't seen him in months. This was scary for both of you. But you came here today. You're trying. And maybe you didn't say everything you wanted to say, but Mer, that's still progress, even if you don't think so", Derek said assuringly.

"Then why do I feel like crap?", she asked him sadly.

"You're being too hard on yourself", Derek replied. "You did a lot more than you give yourself credit for."

"I didn't do anything. I just sat there. You did most of the talking."

"But Meredith, you showed up. And that's the important part. He wanted to see you, and you showed up. You wanted him to do the same for you all those years, and he never did. So I know you feel like this was a big waste of time, but what you did today…I'm proud of you. And I want you to be proud of yourself too", Derek explained, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

Meredith leaned her head against the headrest and stared out the windshield. She began chewing on her bottom lip, thinking over what Derek had said.

After a few minutes of silence, Derek spoke. "You know what he told me today?"

"Hmm?", she asked, turning her head to look at him.

"He said that all his life, he just wanted you to be happy. He knows he was a coward, and can't take back what he's done, but he's trying to be a part of your life. And I'm not defending him. What he's done is horrible. And wrong. But he does…he does love you", Derek said gently.

Meredith gave him a small smile, but still said nothing.

Derek took her silence as a cue to continue. "He said he wanted you to find someone that would make you happy. Someone who could help take away some of the pain. Someone to love you."

"Are you bragging about yourself now?", Meredith asked with a small smirk.

Derek laughed softly. "No. I just want you to know that even after everything that's happened, he loves you. So even if you didn't make breakthroughs today, it doesn't matter", he explained with a small smile. "You'll see him again. Today wasn't your last chance. Small steps are okay."

"Small steps. Right", Meredith breathed.

"You okay?", Derek asked, tucking some hair behind her ear.

Meredith nodded and smiled slightly. "I'm okay."

"I love you", Derek whispered, cupping her face in his hands and kissing her.

"Hmm…I love you too", Meredith smiled against his lips.

After they broke this kiss, they realized that they were running late and made their way back to the hospital for a long night on call.

**Reviews make my day. :)**


	30. Fear

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. I'll leave the brilliance to Shonda.**

Paint. They had been talking about paint all day long. On the way to work, at lunchtime, on the way home, and now again as they sat on the couch. Apparently, this is what people did when they built a house. They painted it. Meredith and Derek had actually settled on some colors. Beiges, yellows, reds, even a shade of lavender in the family room.

But if Meredith never saw a paint swatch again, she'd be more than fine with it. Spending the day with Izzie going on and on about accent colors and carpeting and throw pillows was enough to make her want to scream. And of course, Derek was even more excited. He had been smiling all day. And rather than ruin that for him, Meredith just smiled and went with it.

Meredith and Derek were sitting in the living room surrounded with paint swatches, catalogs, and Izzie's detailed notes. Meredith looked over at the clock. 10:17. Surely discussions about paint exceeding twelve hours was illegal somewhere.

Meredith propped her feet up on the coffee table and yawned. "So, that's it. Right?"

"Well, the playroom", Derek began. He grabbed the swatches and handed her half the pile.

"Wait. Why are we painting that so soon?", she asked confusedly.

"Why wouldn't we paint it?"

Meredith shrugged. 'Well, for one, we don't even have kids."

"So we can't paint the playroom?", he guessed.

"I just think it's too early to be thinking about that", Meredith argued.

"Well, it's not like we're having a baby right now, but we can start thinking about paint", Derek explained.

"Okay…", Meredith said, rolling her eyes.

"What? What's wrong?", he asked. He tossed the paint swatches onto the table and leaned back on the couch.

"Nothing. Whatever", Meredith shrugged.

"I don't understand why you're getting upset. It's just paint", he pointed out.

Meredith crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not getting upset."

"Well, you seem annoyed with me. That's all", he countered. "It's really not a big deal."

"It's just…I don't know. It's a little overwhelming. That's all", she argued.

"I'm not trying to make this into a big deal. I just thought that we'd want to move into a fully furnished house. You know…a bed, a refrigerator, paint on the walls…"

"Are you being sarcastic now?", she asked defensively.

"What are you talking about? I just want to be ready. We have the time to plan it now, and we don't get much free time, so I'm just trying to use this time to plan things", Derek explained.

"I get that. I just assumed we were holding off on kid-related things until we actually had kids", she shot back.

"Where is all of this coming from?", he questioned. "We want kids."

Meredith glared at him. "Yeah. I know we want kids."

"Then doesn't it make sense that we'd paint the playroom while we're painting the rest of the house?", he retorted.

"Derek…", she started, running her fingers through her hair. "I'm just having a momentary freak out, okay?"

"Freak out? About what? The house? Because I thought this is what we wanted", he replied.

"We _do_ want this."

Derek sighed. "I'm just…I'm trying to understand why you're panicking about this. We were having a conversation about paint, and now were fighting. All I'm trying to do is get the house ready."

"I know that", she shot back.

"Well, it seems like your getting upset over nothing. Do you just want to live here forever?"

"What the hell are you talking about?", she spat angrily.

"You're making it seem like you don't want this. It's a playroom, Meredith. It doesn't mean we have to go immediately have kids to put in there. We're talking about painting it. I don't see what the big deal is", he stated impatiently.

"Derek", Meredith sighed. The truth was, she was excited about painting the house. This was the dream, right? And yet, as the dream became more and more of a reality, she started to get scared. It wasn't just the dream anymore. Now it was time to live the dream. Up until this point, everything was fine. But now, for reasons she didn't even fully understand, she was scared.

"Fine. It doesn't matter. If the idea of even _painting _the playroom scares you, then I don't know what's going to happen when we actually _have_ a baby. This is supposed to be a good thing. And all of the sudden, it seems like you're not so into any of this anymore. So we won't paint it. It's fine", he said curtly, getting off the couch and heading toward the kitchen.

As Meredith sat on the couch, she felt her eyes sting with tears. She never meant to fight with him. She just thought it was too soon to pick out paint for the playroom. She always assumed that would be something they'd do when they were actually having a baby. And now, Derek thought she was going to flake out on him. It hurt her. It hurt her in a big way. Just as she was about to go into the kitchen to tell him why she was scared, his pager went off.

Derek walked back into the living room without looking at her. "911. I have to go." When he noticed she was crying, he felt a twinge of pain go straight through his heart. "Mer…"

"Just go, Derek. I'm okay", she murmured, refusing to meet his eyes. Just as Derek opened his mouth to speak, Meredith interrupted him. "Don't."

Derek dropped his head in resignation. "Fine. I love you", he said softly before heading for the front door.

"Yeah", Meredith said sadly, wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt.

When she heard the front door shut, she gathered up all the paint swatches and tossed them onto the side table next to the couch. She couldn't look at them anymore. Meredith wiped away the remainder of her tears and walked into the kitchen for something to drink. She grabbed a bottle of water and went back into the living room, lying down on the couch.

She was too upset to watch TV, so she decided to call Cristina. She grabbed her phone and dialed the number. "Hello?", Cristina answered.

"Hey", Meredith replied.

Cristina could tell just by the sound of Meredith's voice that something was bothering her. "What did he do?"

"We had a fight", Meredith confessed, thankful that Cristina didn't hesitate with asking questions.

"What happened?", Cristina asked. She usually stayed out of their little problems, but if Meredith wanted to talk, she'd talk to her. Because she knew Meredith would do the same for her.

Meredith dropped her head back onto a pillow. "We were talking about paint—"

"Still? You two have been talking about paint all day", Cristina pointed out.

"Yeah, I know. Then he brought up painting the playroom. And I started to have a little freak out, and now I guess he thinks I'm flaking out on him", Meredith explained, playing with the label on her water bottle.

"Why don't you want to paint the playroom?", Cristina asked bluntly.

"I just think it's too early for that. I mean, we want kids, but…", Meredith trailed off.

"That makes it real", Cristina finished, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Yeah", Meredith breathed. "Exactly."

"Well, did you tell him that?", she asked.

"No. I was going to, but before I could, he got angry and then his pager went off and he had to go back to the hospital", Meredith rambled.

"There was a trauma? Why the hell wasn't I paged?", Cristina asked, the annoyed tone evident in her voice.

"Not the point, Cris", Meredith murmured.

"Oh, right. This is about you. So um…why don't you just call tell him that? I mean, you want this, right?", she asked.

"Of course I want it. He just—he hurt my feelings. How could he say I'm not interested in it anymore? That…it hurt me", Meredith said sadly.

"He can be a douche, Mer. That's common knowledge."

"He's douchy to other people, but he never says things like that to me", Meredith responded.

"Call him on his crap", Cristina said simply. "If it hurt you, you have to say something."

"He didn't mean it. I know he didn't mean it. He was just getting annoyed. I get it. But still…", Meredith said softly, sadly.

"That's…that happens sometimes. You guys love each other. You're gonna say bitchy things, you're gonna get angry. But don't let the unimportant crap get in the way of the good things", Cristina said before pausing. "Damn it. I sound like Izzie."

"You do", she replied, giggling softly. "You're right though. I just don't like fighting with him", Meredith admitted.

Cristina shrugged. "I know you don't. You two are like the poster children for sickeningly happy couples."

"I was just having a temporary freak out. Moving into our house...getting married...planning things for these kids we want to have that we have to raise. It's...the dream. Only it's freaking scary."

"Of course it's scary", Cristina agreed. "You're entitled to your freak out. Frankly, I'd be concerned if you weren't freaking out a little", Cristina stated honestly.

"So I'm not just being insane?", Meredith asked sadly. These were the times when she was thankful for Cristina. She knew that she could depend on her to be honest.

"No. You're not insane. But it's not worth fighting about either", Cristina pointed out. "Think of it this way. And believe it or not, I am actually being sincere. What you and Mc—Derek—have isn't something all of us get. I thought I had it, but then I got left in the back of a church in a wedding dress. So clearly, I didn't."

Meredith immediately felt guilty for complaining about her problems when she was much luckier in finding love than her friend. "Cris—"

"No...let me say this. You two...that's what everybody wants. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that you two love each other. So don't let stupid stuff like paint and carpet get in the way of that. It's just...not worth it."

Meredith smiled slightly. "You're right. Thank you."

"I know I'm right", Cristina said smugly, the amusement evident in her voice. "Just talk to him."

"I know. I'm going to. He'll probably be stuck at the hospital all night though", Meredith sighed.

"About that. Why weren't we paged?", Cristina asked now that Meredith's problems had been taken care of.

Meredith shrugged. "Well Alex and Izzie are on call, so I guess that's all they needed."

"Sucks", Cristina muttered.

"I'm on-call tomorrow night, so I'm sort of glad I wasn't paged. Forty eight hours straight is wearing me down", Meredith replied.

"I thought you said the last time you were on-call, you and McDreamy spent the whole night having sex", Cristina mocked.

"Slow night", Meredith shrugged. "What else were we going to do?"

"Is there ever a day where you two don't do each other?", Cristina asked sarcastically.

Meredith bit her lip and thought for a moment. "Um, not for a while."

Cristina sighed. "At least one of us is getting some."

"Yeah, I guess so", Meredith agreed.

"So are you okay?", Cristina asked sincerely.

"Yeah", Meredith smiled. "I'm okay. Thank you, Cris."

"Mhm", Cristina murmured in response. "Just do me a favor."

"What?", Meredith asked.

"When you tell me all about the make-up sex, leave out the graphic details", Cristina cringed, recalling all the times when Meredith was a little too free with the technicalities of Meredith and Derek's bedroom romps.

"I thought you liked getting sex details", Meredith asked curiously.

"I do. But I don't need to hear about McDreamy's McPenis. Bad images", Cristina shuddered.

Meredith laughed. "Fine."

"Thank you", Cristina smiled.

"Okay, well, I'm going to call him. I don't like fighting with him", Meredith said softly.

"Okay. See you tomorrow", Cristina replied.

"Bye", Meredith smiled. After they hung up, Meredith dialed Derek's number, but it was busy, so she decided to leave a message.

_Hey, so, look, we need to talk. I don't want us to fight about something like this, so just…if you get a minute and you're not busy, call me, okay? I love you. Bye._

--

As Derek drove into work, all he could think about was the fight he had with Meredith. He never wanted to fight with her. He didn't even understand how a discussion about paint could turn into a fight. When he saw her crying on the couch, there was nothing more he wanted to do than hold her in his arms and apologize. Derek knew that what he said had hurt her. He shouldn't have said it. But he just didn't understand where her panicked feelings were coming from. They had been so excited about it. And all of the sudden, she seemed more scared than anything else.

Mark's phone call snapped Derek out of his thoughts as he drove to the hospital. "Hello?"

"Hey. Were you paged too?", Mark asked.

"Yep. I'm headed back there now", Derek replied.

"Any word on what happened?"

"Nope, just a trauma", Derek answered.

Mark nodded. "Is Grey with you?"

"No", Derek sighed. "She's at home. Probably crying."

"What the hell did you do?", Mark asked worriedly.

"We were talking about paint, and I brought up the playroom, and she just started freaking out. I guess she thinks I'm rushing things. I just want to be ready, you know?"

Mark shrugged. "This is Grey. She tends to freak out over things."

"Yeah, but, I don't get why she got so upset. It doesn't make any sense to leave one room unpainted. I think it's something bigger than just paint, but she's not telling me", Derek said sadly.

"Look, man, she'll come around. You just have to give her some time. You've got to remember, this is new to her. You've done this before. She hasn't", Mark pointed out.

Derek sighed. Mark was right. Meredith had never done this before. It was all new to her. Of course she'd be nervous about it. "Damn."

"Am I right?"

"Yeah", Derek sighed, rolling his eyes at his friend's arrogance and his own stupidity.

"Just talk to her. It'll be fine", Mark assured him.

"Yeah. I know", Derek agreed. "Okay, well, I'm gonna go. I'll be there in a few minutes."

"Alright, man. I'll see you", Mark replied.

"Bye", Derek said, ending the phone call. He tossed his phone onto the passenger seat and continued to make the drive into work.

--

Meredith was just getting ready to head upstairs to bed when she heard her cell phone ringing. At first, she thought it might be Derek, but he probably too busy dealing with whatever trauma there was at work. When she looked at the caller ID, a confused look came over her face. "Alex?", she murmured to herself.

"Hello?", she answered.

"Mer", Alex said immediately.

"Hey. What's wrong? Why are you—"

"Mer…it's about Derek", Alex blurted out.

Meredith froze in place. Her heart began speeding up and she could barely remember how to use her voice. "What?" was all she could manage to say.

"He was in an accident. He's okay, but they—"

"He—what—Oh my God! Alex!", Meredith cried.

"Mer", Alex interrupted. "He is _okay_. He's getting checked out now."

"Oh my—I have—I um—I'll be right there", Meredith stammered nervously.

"Mer!", Alex called out before she got the chance to hang up. "Relax. Okay? Are you alright driving? I can come get you."

"No it's—I'm okay. I'm gonna go", Meredith replied. She quickly hung up the phone and grabbed her keys before rushing out the door and making her way to the hospital.

All of the sudden, fighting about paint didn't matter so much. In fact, it didn't matter at all.

**So after seeing the horrible promos and sneak peek ABC put together to freak us all out, I got an idea. I have a plan with this. No worries.**

**Reviews make my day!**


	31. Revelation

**Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.**

**Good thing I wrote these two chapters together. I'm sorry I even did what I did in the last chapter in the first place, because people were pretty upset about it. The only reason I did it was to give Meredith a wakeup call. I'm doing something Shonda has yet to deal with on the show since season three. And I think it's something pretty important. So if you're sticking with this, I really appreciate it. :)**

As Meredith drove to the hospital after getting the call from Alex, the only thought running through her mind was Derek. Suddenly, nothing else in the world mattered. Alex told her that Derek was okay, but she wouldn't believe it until she saw him with her own eyes. He was the love of her life, the person that she couldn't survive without. If he wasn't okay, she didn't know what she would do.

It was a small struggle to make it to the hospital without pulling over to the side of the road and breaking down. She managed to pull into the parking lot, park her car, and hastily run into the ER. She was immediately greeted by Alex. "Mer!", he shouted loud enough so she would be able to hear him over the already chaotic emergency room that had been full of victims of whatever trauma had taken place earlier that night.

Meredith spun on her heel and spotted him. He rushed over to her side and pulled her into an empty hallway. "Mer, he's okay", Alex assured her.

"Alex", Meredith cried. The damn burst. She could no longer hold back the tears. She gripped onto her friend's yellow emergency gown and cried into his chest. Alex wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

"Mer, listen to me. He is okay. They took him up for a CT a minute ago. He's alert, he's talking. Everything is going to be okay", he said softly, gently rubbing her back.

Meredith sniffled and continued to shake. "I have to see him."

"I'll take you upstairs. Come on", Alex said, keeping his arm wrapped around her side, her body still wracked with fear, even after Alex had assured her that Derek was okay.

"We—we were fighting. We had a fight about the playroom, and then he got called back into work. And I didn't even—I didn't even tell him I loved him before he left. Oh God…", Meredith whimpered.

"The minute he got here, he told us to call you. He didn't even care about getting himself checked out. He told us to make sure you knew that he was okay", Alex replied as the two stepped onto the elevator.

"What happened?", Meredith asked almost inaudibly. She dug around in her coat pocket for a tissue and wiped her red, puffy eyes.

"The guy behind slammed into the back of his car. So they took him up to CT to make sure everything was okay. He had some tenderness in his ribs and some minor bruising. Other than that, he looks okay", Alex informed her.

"What if he—? He might have internal injuries. Alex, what if he…", Meredith began before crying again.

Alex sighed sadly for his friend. "We won't know until we get the CT results. But I don't think it's anything serious."

The elevator doors opened and Alex led the way to an empty patient room. "After his CT, they'll be bringing him in here. So let's just wait for them to get back, okay?", Alex asked gently.

Meredith knew that no matter how much she wanted to see him, it wouldn't be an option until all of the tests had been run to make sure everything was okay. "Who called the ambulance?", Meredith asked with shaky breaths.

Alex walked her over to the small couch so she could sit down. "Not sure. I'm guessing it was someone in another car nearby."

"Who's with him right now?", she asked nervously.

"Bailey and Izzie. He's in good hands, Mer. Just try to relax", Alex said softly.

Meredith let out a deep breath and leaned back on the couch. "We were fighting. It was so stupid…"

"Mer—", Alex began before she interrupted him.

"We were fighting about the playroom. The playroom, Alex! Do you know how stupid that is? And now he's hurt and I…", Meredith cried, unable to finish her sentence.

"Mer, try to remember…it could have been worse", Alex reminded her. "Much worse."

Meredith nodded and sniffled. "I know", she squeaked.

"Everything's going to be okay", he said comfortingly. "He'll be here probably within the next twenty minutes. CT was backed up because of the trauma that came in. He was walking and talking…don't worry until you have to, okay?"

"Yeah. Okay", Meredith breathed, brushing some hair out of her eyes.

Alex's pager interrupted them. "Damn. I have to get back down to the pit. You gonna be okay? Want me to send someone up to sit with you?"

"No. I'm okay", Meredith said, sniffling slightly. "Thank you, Alex."

"It's gonna be okay, Mer", Alex whispered, giving her one last side hug before getting up off the couch.

Meredith nodded. "Okay." After Alex left the room, Meredith was once again left alone with her thoughts. She rested her head in her hands and sighed.

All she could think about as she sat there was how Derek must have felt when she drowned. Only what he went through was multiplied by a million. She was dead. Frozen, blue, gone. He literally had to breathe for her for an hour of his life. There was really no comparison in the situation. Meredith wasn't sitting there breathing life into Derek's body. She didn't have to wait in the hall while half the hospital tried to bring him back to life.

Something like this put life in perspective. Paint didn't matter. Fighting over a minor detail of the house—who cared? She hadn't even told him she loved him when he stepped out the door.

What if the accident had been worse? What if he died? Meredith couldn't even comprehend the thought. The idea of Derek dying brought tears to Meredith's eyes. She was overcome with immense sobs and began crying uncontrollably with her face buried in her hands.

She didn't know how long she'd been sitting there when Derek, Izzie, and Bailey finally came into the room.

"Mer", Derek said softly, his eyes full of sadness for his fiancé.

Meredith raised her head and looked at him. "Derek", she said quietly, breathing a sigh of relief.

Bailey and Izzie helped him into bed and made sure he was comfortable. "You okay, Derek?", Bailey asked softly. Derek nodded and laid his head back on the pillow. "How about you, Meredith? You alright?"

"Yeah. I'm—I'm okay", Meredith replied nervously as she made her way to Derek's bedside. She took Derek's hand in hers and squeezed it gently. She ran her fingers through his hair and kissed his forehead. "Is everything okay?", she whimpered, fearful of the answer.

Bailey nodded. "Everything is fine. There's no internal bleeding. He has a fractured rib and some bruising, but that's it. We just want to keep him overnight as a precaution, but he's going to be just fine."

"Thank God", Meredith cried, keeping a firm grip on his hand.

"We'll be back to check on you in a few hours. Grey, keep an eye on him", Bailey instructed.

"Page me if you need anything. Either of you", Izzie said with a small smile.

"Thanks Iz. Thank you, Dr. Bailey", Meredith replied, her eyes still pooled with tears.

After Izzie and Bailey left the room and shut the door, Meredith began sobbing again, letting go of the tears she had been holding back. "Derek. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you so much. Oh God…", she cried.

"Mer, it's okay. I'm fine", Derek whispered, pulling her down to sit on the side of the bed. "Everything is okay."

"Derek, you were in an accident. And we were fighting, and it's all so stupid. You could have been—it could have so much worse. And I'm sorry. I love you so much", she sobbed, her body shaking with sadness.

Derek leaned up slightly, wincing at the slight pain in his ribs. He kissed her forehead and smiled at her. "I love you too. And don't even worry about the fight. It's not important. We're okay", he said softly. "Slow, deep breaths. Just relax. It's okay…"

Meredith closed her eyes momentarily and evened out her breathing before looking at him. "Are you in any pain?"

"Just a little sore. But I'm okay, I promise", he assured her.

"I'm sorry", she said quietly as tears streamed down her cheeks. "I'm sorry for everything you went through when I drowned. I know that what I went through tonight doesn't even begin to describe what you went through that day. I took you for granted. You had to—when I think about what you must have been feeling, it's—I am so sorry", she wept, kissing his forehead. "I love you so much."

She finally understood. Until she'd actually experienced something like this, she never realized that losing Derek was possible. But he knew. He knew what it was like to have to consider the possibility of a life without her. "I get it—the hovering. The protecting. I know that what happened to me is worse than what happened to you, and because of that, you're the one who suffered. I didn't get it—but I do. Now I get it", she said softly, looking into his eyes.

Derek nodded slightly but said nothing. There was nothing he could say. She had said it all. They had finally come to an understanding. The situations were almost entirely different, but the lesson learned had been the same. They understood.

"Come here", Derek finally said, moving over slightly on the bed to make room for her.

"I'll just go on the couch. I don't want to hurt you", Meredith replied, kissing his cheek.

"You're not going to hurt me. It's okay", he said with a soft smile.

Meredith returned the smile and nodded. She kicked off her shoes and gently lay down in the bed next to him. "I want to paint the playroom", she sniffled, turning her head to face him.

"No it's—you're right. We don't have to do that yet. It's alright", he said softly.

"No. We're painting it. I was scared before. And I shouldn't have been. This is what we want. I guess I was freaking out earlier because I realized that all of this is real, you know? And it's scary. But at the same time, it's perfect. It's what we've wanted for a long time now", Meredith stated, taking his hand and lacing their fingers.

"You've never done this before", Derek said understandingly. "I have. And I think sometimes I forget that. Because I'm so excited about it. But I get it now. I understand why you were scared."

"I'm not scared anymore. I mean, not of little things, anyway. Stuff like you getting hurt scares me. The fact that we could lose each other scares me. But a lifetime with you—that doesn't scare me. A lifetime _without_ you scares me. Because I need you. And I love you so much", she said softly, leaning in and pressing her lips to his.

"I love you too", he smiled. "And I have the same fears that you do. And that's okay."

"Being scared means we have something to lose", Meredith replied, recalling what she had said to Derek months ago.

Derek nodded slightly at the memory and smiled. "Yeah."

"And I don't intend on ever losing you", she whispered.

"You won't", he replied, kissing the top of her head. "I'm here."

"I love you, Derek", she said softly, breathing in his scent that always comforted her.

Derek pulled her close to him and smiled. "I love you too, Meredith."

--

The next morning, Meredith's eyelids fluttered open and she looked around the room curiously. When she realized where she was, she remembered what had happened the night before and quickly looked to Derek to make sure he was okay. She smiled softly and kissed his cheek when she saw him sleeping peacefully, their fingers still laced together.

She gently rested her head on his shoulder and drifted back off to sleep until people started making their way into the room to make sure Derek was okay.

Dr. Bailey entered the room and smiled softly at the two lying in bed together, hand in hand. She walked over and gently tapped Derek's shoulder. "Dr. Shepherd", she whispered.

Derek opened his eyes and adjusted them to the light before looking at Dr. Bailey.

"I just want to check to make sure everything is okay", Bailey explained. Derek nodded and Bailey quickly checked Derek's injury, inspecting the area with her hand. "Everything looks good. I'm going to go sign the discharge papers."

"Okay", Derek smiled sleepily. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"Grey snores, huh?", Bailey asked with a slight smirk, looking at Meredith's sleeping form.

"Yeah. She does", Derek grinned, kissing her forehead. "You get used to it."

Bailey chuckled softly before turning around and exiting the room, leaving Meredith and Derek alone.

Meredith mumbled something incoherent in her sleep before stretching out in the bed. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. "Hey", she whispered.

Derek smiled. "Morning."

"Mmm…morning", Meredith sighed, sitting up slightly in the bed. "How are you?"

"I'm okay", he said with a nod. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm okay", she said softly before kissing his cheek.

"Yellow", she whispered.

Derek looked at her confusedly. "Yellow?"

"For the playroom. I like yellow", she smiled.

"Hmm…", Derek grinned.

"That room gets a lot of sun. So yellow would look nice in there. And it works for boys or girls", Meredith said with a small smile.

"Yeah. It does", Derek agreed as he leaned in and kissed her.

"I love you", Meredith breathed.

"I love you too", Derek replied, kissing her again. Meredith moaned against his lips and ran her fingers through his hair. Just as she was about to thrust her tongue into his mouth, the door to his room opened.

"Whoa", Mark laughed. "Didn't mean to interrupt."

Meredith pulled back from the kiss and quickly regained composure. "Hey Mark."

"How are you two doing?", Mark asked, walking over to the bed.

"We're fine. Now leave", Derek laughed half-heartedly.

"No strenuous activity for a few days. That means no wild sex", Mark grinned.

Meredith blushed and turned her head away from him. Derek just looked to his friend and rolled his eyes. "What are you doing here, Mark?"

"Checking in", Mark shrugged. "Everything okay?"

"We're good, thanks", Meredith smiled sarcastically.

"Bailey wanted me to tell you that you're off work until Monday", Mark informed him as he leaned against the wall.

"What? Why?", Derek asked. "I'm fine."

"Hey, do get mad at me. She just sent me in here to tell you", Mark said, throwing his arms up in defense.

"It's only for a few days", Meredith said, kissing his cheek.

"Hey Dr. Shepherd. How are you feeling?", Izzie asked with a smile as she walked into the room, followed by the George, Alex, and Cristina.

"I'm fine", Derek smiled.

"I interrupted foreplay", Mark grinned.

"We weren't going to do anything", Meredith scolded, rolling her eyes.

"Sloan, leave the poor girl alone", Bailey sighed as she walked back into the room with Derek's discharge papers. "And the rest of you, get back to work."

They all said their goodbyes and exited the room before Bailey spoke to Meredith and Derek. "Shepherd, you're free to go. And Grey, the Chief gave you the day off", Bailey informed them.

"Oh. I can work. It's fine", Meredith argued, shaking her head.

Bailey smirked. "Just take your damn day off."

"Fine", Meredith conceded.

"Good", Bailey nodded. "Okay, Shepherd, no lifting, no bending. And limit the uh…bedroom activity", she said amusedly, watching as Meredith's face turned a bright shade of red. "Here's a prescription to help with the pain", she said, handing Derek the little white slip of paper.

Derek smiled and accepted it. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"Okay, I'll see you on Monday—not a day sooner. You need to heal. And Grey, I'll see you tomorrow", Bailey smiled.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, taking Derek's hand. "And thank you again."

Bailey just smiled. "Alright, go home, and get some rest."

When Bailey left the room, Meredith looked to Derek and smiled. "Looks like I get to take care of you today."

"I guess you do", he smirked as she helped him remove the hospital gown and change back into his clothes.

"Oh Derek", Meredith sighed as she looked at the bruising from where his ribs had hit the steering wheel.

"I'm okay", Derek assured her. "I just need to put ice on there."

"We can stop at the pharmacy on the way home for the prescription", Meredith said as she helped him put his shirt on. "I'm just glad that's the worst of it."

Derek kissed her forehead. "That's the worst of it."

"Even still, you're taking it easy today", Meredith said softly, fixing his collar and kissing his cheek.

"But we fought. So now we have to have make-up sex", Derek reminded her as he pulled her close and kissed her.

"Hmm…no", Meredith giggled against his lips.

"What do you mean _no_?", he asked amusedly.

"Too much activity", Meredith explained. "It could be dangerous."

"You could give me a sponge bath", he said with a smirk.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You're not _that_ hurt. And we'd just end up having sex."

"Which is why I think it's a good idea", he grinned.

"We'll see", Meredith said with a coy smile. "Do you need the wheelchair?"

"No, I can walk", he nodded.

"Okay", Meredith said softly, taking his hand. "Let's go home."

--

After a quick stop at the pharmacy, Meredith and Derek went back to the house and relaxed in bed after eating a little something and changing into comfier clothes.

Meredith laid the ice pack over Derek's torso and he winced slightly at the coldness. "Sorry", she whispered.

"I'll get used to it", he smiled as he lay more comfortably in the bed.

Meredith lay down next to him and rubbed his arm gently. "Did the medicine kick in yet?"

"Yeah, a little", he nodded, looking over to her.

"Do you want anything?", she asked. "A drink or…"

"No, I'm okay", he said, smiling slightly.

"Are you sure?", Meredith asked worriedly.

Derek chuckled slightly at her great concern for him. "Yeah, I'm sure."

"Am I hovering?", she asked softly.

"A little", he shrugged, smiling at her. "It's nice though."

"Sorry", she whispered, kissing his cheek. "I guess I'm a hoverer."

"If you hovered over me in a different way, I'm sure I'd feel a lot better", he said with a smirk.

"You're not getting sex until you're healed", Meredith told him. "I don't want to be responsible for any further injury."

"So mean to me…", he teased.

Meredith giggled. "It keeps you in line."

They spent the remainder of the day resting, keeping the physical activity limited to lying in bed together. They had learned a lot in the past twenty-four hours. They learned that getting angry over the little things wasn't worth it. What mattered was the love they shared, and they would never again take it for granted.


	32. Changing for the Better

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them.**

Derek had been home now for a few days, and Meredith was in full nurturing mode. Derek's bruises were becoming less noticeable, and he could certainly get back to the hospital, but he was off work until tomorrow, which drove him crazy. Meredith had been taking care of him, making sure he kept ice on his injury, and didn't do anything to further fracture his rib. She was calling him every few hours at work to make sure he was okay. And of course, he was fine.

Derek actually found it adorable that she cared so much. Every time she would call, he would laugh and tell her to get back to work. But that didn't keep her from calling. When she came home at night, she would refuse to let him cook, which made for some pretty interesting dinners made by Meredith herself. Surprisingly, some of it was actually pretty good. Meredith had pretty strict rules when it came to him resting and healing. She even denied him sex for almost a week now because she wanted to make sure he was fully healed before that kind of physical activity.

During her lunch break, she pulled out her cell phone, resulting in laughs and smirks from her friends sitting around the table.

Meredith looked at them curiously. "What?"

"How many times have you called him today?", Alex asked amusedly.

"Just twice", Meredith said defensively. She pressed number one on the speed dial and waited for his answer.

"Mer, I'm fine", Derek chuckled after he picked up the phone.

"What are you doing?", she asked, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"Laundry", Derek replied.

"I said I'd do it", Meredith scolded. "You're not supposed to be lifting."

"Mer, I can do a load of laundry. It's no problem", Derek said with a smile.

Meredith sighed. "What else did you do today?"

"Oh, you know, cleaned the rain gutters, rearranged the furniture…", he teased.

"Derek—"

"I'm kidding. I got myself some coffee, did some paperwork, and now I'm doing some laundry", Derek said, laughing slightly.

"Fine. You can do some laundry, but then I want you to rest. You're coming back tomorrow and I want to make sure you're okay", Meredith explained, blushing slightly as her friends stared at her. She got up 

from the table and walked out into a hallway. She swore she could hear her friends laughing in the background.

"I could have come back to work days ago. I'm fine, Mer. But I'll rest, I promise", he smiled.

"Okay", Meredith said softly.

"Get any good cases today?", Derek asked.

"I'm scrubbing in with Bailey to correct an omphalocele on a newborn", Meredith replied as she leaned against the wall. "And later I'm going to the gallery to watch the neuro fellow do a cranial nerve reconstruction."

"Hmm…busy day", Derek concluded with a grin.

"Busy day", Meredith agreed. "I miss you here."

Derek smiled. "I'll be back tomorrow."

"Which is why you need to rest. So go lie down—and don't cook. I'll stop for food on the way home", Meredith said, brushing some hair out of her face.

"The overprotective thing…it's cute", Derek smirked.

"Shut up", Meredith shot back, unable to hide the smile on her face. "I have to go finish lunch then get ready to scrub in. So I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Okay", Derek responded with a smile. "I love you."

"I love you too", Meredith said softly. "Bye."

After hanging up, Meredith rejoined her friends in the cafeteria. "How's McDreamBoat?", Cristina asked amusedly.

"McDreamBoat. That's a new one", Meredith giggled. "He's fine."

"Like you knew he would be…", George added.

"I just wanted to make sure", Meredith replied, taking a sip of her water.

"It's been quiet at night these past few days. You two haven't…", Alex hinted amusedly.

Meredith blushed. "No, we have not."

"Shocking", Cristina replied sarcastically with a mouthful of chips.

"Oh, leave her alone", Izzie said in defense of her friend.

"Thank you, Iz", Meredith whispered. The sound of her pager interrupted them. "I have to go prep my patient."

"What have you got?", Cristina asked curiously.

Meredith grabbed her white coat off the arm of her chair and stood up. "Omphalocele on a newborn in OR one."

"Boring", Cristina sighed.

"You're on ortho. You have no room to make fun of me", Meredith shot back jokingly.

"You're on the vagina squad", Cristina reminded her. "So technically, I can make fun of you."

"Shut up", Meredith called out as she made her way to the NICU to prepare her patient for his upcoming surgery.

--

Meredith was making her way to the OR with the small baby boy when she passed by Cristina in the hallway.

"Heading into surgery?", Cristina asked, looking at the tiny baby in the isolette.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. Can you call Derek in an hour? Just check in on him for me…"

"Oh, you can't be serious?" Cristina asked dryly.

"I'd do it for you", Meredith countered as the two walked down the hall.

"What do you want me to say to him?"

"Just ask him if he's okay and if there's anything he needs. And ask him what he wants me to pick up for dinner", Meredith explained.

Cristina rolled her eyes. "You owe me for this."

"Thank you, Cris", Meredith smiled sweetly as they approached the door to the operating room.

"I hate you", Cristina sighed as Meredith handed her friend her cell phone.

"You love me", Meredith smiled, cocking her head slightly. "Okay, I have to go. Call him in an hour. And don't tell me you forgot."

"Fine", Cristina conceded, putting the cell phone in her pocket. "See you."

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

--

An hour later, just before Cristina was about to scrub in on her ankle allograft surgery, she decided to follow through on her promise and call Derek. She went to Meredith's contact list on her phone and quickly found Derek's number. She dialed and waited for the answer.

"Mer", Derek laughed.

"It's not Mer. It's Cristina", she corrected.

"Oh. Hi. Why are you…?"

Cristina rolled her eyes. "I was told to call and check in on you. How are you doing?", she asked unsympathetically.

"She told you to call me?", Derek asked amusedly.

"She's in surgery, so she made me do it", Cristina explained. "And I'm supposed to ask if there's anything you need. And what you want for dinner."

Derek laughed. "I've never heard the compassionate side of Cristina Yang before."

"Yeah, whatever", Cristina smirked.

"Tell her that I'm fine. I don't need anything. And whatever she wants to pick up for dinner is fine with me", Derek said with a smile.

"Great."

"Good", Derek grinned. "Oh, I forgot. If you wouldn't mind, could you remind her to pick up some condoms? We're all out."

"Okay that's—more than I needed to know", Cristina groaned, walking toward her patient's room.

Derek sighed. "Please?"

"Fine. But you owe me for this", Cristina warned.

"I'm your boss", Derek reminded her, amused at the entire scenario.

"I'm also your fiancé's best friend. And we're talking about condoms", Cristina argued.

"Fine. I'll let you scrub in on something", Derek conceded.

"Fine", Cristina nodded. "I'll tell her to pick up the condoms."

"Thank you, Yang", Derek smiled.

"Yeah", she mumbled. "Alright then. Bye."

Derek laughed. "Bye."

--

Meredith was sitting in the NICU taking down post-op notes on her patient when Bailey walked inside and stood next to her. "Yang asked me to give you this", she said, handing Meredith her cell phone and a folded piece of paper inside.

_Mer, _

_McDreamy is fine. He doesn't care what you get for dinner. And you need condoms._

_-Cris_

Meredith blushed slightly and laughed before putting both the note and her phone into her pocket.

"Do I even want to know?", Bailey asked as she checked the baby's vitals.

"I told Cristina to call and check up on Derek", Meredith giggled softly.

"How's he doing?", Bailey asked.

"He's good. I think he's ready to come back", Meredith smiled.

"Good", Bailey nodded.

"How's this little guy doing?", Bailey asked with a smile, referring to the tiny baby who had just had his corrective surgery.

"He's fine", Meredith replied. She rubbed the baby's arm softly with her finger and smiled.

"You're good with them", Bailey pointed out.

Meredith looked at her boss curiously. "Hmm?"

"You're good with babies", Bailey complimented.

"Oh. Yeah, well, I like them", Meredith shrugged.

"You and Derek ever talk about kids?", Bailey asked as she recorded the baby's stats.

"We want them eventually. I'm not sure when, but we do want them", Meredith replied, smiling softly.

"It'll change your life—for the better, of course", Bailey added with a smile. "It's tough, but it's worth it."

Meredith let out a deep breath and smiled as the baby grabbed onto her finger. "Did you ever think you were just way in over your head?"

"What do you mean?", Bailey asked.

"Like…maybe you were just a little bit crazy thinking you can do it all?", Meredith asked honestly.

Bailey closed the chart and looked at her. "Everybody thinks that. It's human. But don't let the fear get the best of you, Grey. You can do it. Some days, you're gonna wonder why you put yourself through it, but then you take a step back, realize everything you _do_ have, and you know. You know why you toughed it out. Once you have your own one day, you'll get it. Right now, all of that is in the future. But when you actually do it, it's completely different. You'll see…"

Meredith smiled. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"Sure", Bailey nodded, smiling slightly. "After you give the parents an update, you can go home for the evening."

"They were asking…can they see him?"

"Yeah, they can see him", Bailey responded.

"Okay", Meredith replied with a small smile. She grabbed the chart and made her way to the waiting room to inform the parents of their son's post-op condition. After taking them back to the NICU to see their son, Meredith changed out of her scrubs in the residents' lounge.

"I'm getting dinner on the way home. Any preferences?", Meredith asked her roommates.

"Anything is fine", Alex replied, pulling his shirt over his head.

"Okay", Meredith nodded.

"Don't forget about the condoms", Cristina yelled out as Meredith began walking out of the room.

Meredith turned around and rolled her eyes. "A little louder next time, Cris."

"Just wanted to make sure you knew", Cristina shrugged, shimmying out of her scrub pants and into her jeans.

Meredith laughed. "I remember."

--

Meredith arrived home an hour later with takeout from a little Italian restaurant, along with a box of condoms. "Hey", she said with a smile. She walked over to the couch and kissed Derek's forehead. "How was your day?"

"Boring", Derek laughed. "Yours?"

"Good. So Cristina called you…", Meredith mentioned as the two walked into the kitchen.

Derek grinned. "Yeah. She called. That was interesting."

"I heard you told her to get condoms", Meredith said with a smirk. She set aside Izzie and Alex's food in the fridge and walked back over to the table to join Derek.

"We were all out. It was an emergency", Derek said with a cocky smile.

"Because we can't go a night without", Meredith said, rolling her eyes.

Derek laughed. "I just think it's better to be prepared."

"I guess", Meredith agreed. "But from now on, you're buying them. The kid at the cash register always looks at me like I'm a horny teenage girl. It's embarrassing. Besides, you have the penis", she pointed out.

"Can't really argue with that", Derek smirked. "And fine, I'll buy the condoms from now on."

"Thank you", Meredith smiled. "So what did you do today?"

"Nothing. Just the laundry and work stuff. I missed you", he said softly, kissing her cheek.

"I missed you too", Meredith smiled. "And I missed neuro."

Derek took a sip of his drink. "I would let you scrub in tomorrow, but I already told Cristina that she had first dibs on any surgery."

"Why?", Meredith asked with a giggle.

"For asking her to ask you about the condoms", Derek explained.

"That's Cristina", Meredith shrugged.

"Oh, I almost forgot…", Derek said excitedly. He got up from his chair and walked out of the kitchen. Moments later he returned with an envelope.

"What?", Meredith asked curiously.

"We got this in the mail today", he smiled, removing the contents from the envelope.

"What is it?", Meredith asked, taking it from his hand.

"It's a picture of our new little nephew—and godchild. Amy and Tom mailed us an ultrasound picture", Derek beamed.

"Really?", Meredith asked softly as she admired the 4d ultrasound picture. "It's so clear…"

"The note they sent along with it said that they almost didn't find out what it was because he was facing away from them the whole time. But then he turned around. And he's all boy", Derek beamed.

"There's definitely a penis there", Meredith giggled, pointing to the aforementioned body part. "Oh, Derek, he's beautiful."

Derek kissed Meredith's temple. "Yep. He is."

"Nine nieces. Six nephews", Meredith smiled.

"Hmm…", Derek chuckled.

"And they really want us two to be the godparents?", she asked softly.

"Yeah", Derek smiled.

"How far along is she now?", Meredith asked.

"Five months", Derek said with a grin.

Meredith looked over at him. "And we're still flying out there in October for the baptism?"

"Yeah—I mean, I'd like to", he said with a nod.

"Me too", Meredith whispered, leaning in to kiss him.

"I love you", Derek murmured against her lips.

Meredith smiled. "I love you too."

"You keep staring at the picture", he chuckled.

"It's my sort-of-nephew—in utero", she pointed out with a grin. "Kind of amazing..."

"It is, isn't it?" Derek kissed her cheek and took another bite of his salad.

"I want to buy a little frame for this", Meredith smiled, holding onto the small picture.

"Good. I want everybody to know who he is", Derek grinned. "I called my mom today too. Just thought I'd let her know that I was okay."

"How was she?", Meredith asked.

"She panicked for a few minutes, but then once I assured her I was okay, she calmed down", Derek chuckled.

"Good", Meredith smiled. "So what else did she say?"

"Well…", Derek began.

Meredith looked at him worriedly. "What? Something bad?"

"No no no", he assured her. "It's just—every year my sisters and their families all go to Disney World together. The only week they could get off this year is the week of the wedding. They didn't book it yet, because they wanted to see if we minded…", Derek explained.

"Do you want them to come? They're your family so if you want them to be there, I want them to be there too", Meredith said. She really didn't mind either way, but if Derek wanted his sisters there, she wanted to make sure they were.

Derek laughed. "This is going to sound terrible, but I sort of wanted to keep it small anyway."

"So I guess your mom wouldn't come either", Meredith said, the disappointment evident in her voice. She and Linda had gotten to be extremely close, and she was actually looking forward to seeing her again.

"Oh no—my mom wants to come to the wedding. She said she wouldn't miss it for the world", Derek said with a smile.

Meredith returned the smile and breathed a sigh of relief. "Good."

"So you don't mind if they don't come? Because if you wanted them to—"

"It's better this way, I think. The smaller the better, right?", Meredith asked.

"Exactly", Derek agreed. "More time for the two of us to spend together." He reached over and kissed the top of her hand.

Meredith smiled. "I like that."

"So there's going to be about fifteen people I guess", Derek said with a shrug.

"I think I can handle that", Meredith giggled. "It's just all of our friends and your mom—plus Molly, Eric, and Laura…doesn't sound too scary."

"I don't know…Laura may be planning some sabotage", he laughed jokingly.

"Yeah, probably", Meredith giggled. "Lexie said that Laura keeps talking about us."

"That's because we're a good aunt and uncle", Derek smiled as she stole some food off of his plate.

"I guess we are", Meredith smiled before biting her lip. "So I talked to Bailey today…"

Derek looked at her curiously. "About what?"

"She asked if you and I ever thought about having kids", Meredith explained softly.

"What did you say?", he asked.

"I told her we did. Then she went into this thing about how it's tough, but worth it. And she said all of these sweet things. And then you showed me our nephew's ultrasound picture, and I just—I was wondering when you wanted to—I mean, when do you think we should—I know we're not even married so it's probably too early to even talk about it, but I was wondering when you might—we might—want to…", she stammered.

Derek smiled lovingly at her. "Start a family?", he finished.

"Yeah", Meredith nodded. "I mean, I know we want to, but we never really talked about _when_ we wanted to."

"A few years?", Derek asked softly.

"How long is a few years?", she asked, staring at the ultrasound picture in her hand.

"How long do you want it to be?", he asked gently. He knew that this was a conversation they needed to have eventually anyway. And he really did want to know her thoughts.

"Well, this July will be my third year of residency. I'm not really going to have a more flexible schedule until my fifth year. And even then it's not going to be cut back by much. So…I don't know…", Meredith sighed. "I don't want to have one right away, but I don't want to keep putting it off either."

Derek nodded in understanding. "Well, maybe two years then?"

"Two?"

"Three?", Derek asked gently, not wanting to freak her out.

"I was thinking like…a year or a year and a half", she admitted, biting her lip.

"That soon?", he asked curiously.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, you're going to be thirty-nine in a few weeks. And I'm going to be thirty-two this summer. That's not old or anything. I just…ugh, I don't know."

Derek smiled at her. "How about we start trying around our one year anniversary in July. That's a little over a year from now", he suggested. "You probably won't get pregnant on the first try anyway."

"I don't know…the Shepherd's seem pretty fertile", Meredith smirked.

Derek laughed. "Well then, if it happens, it happens", he shrugged. "If we make a baby on the first try, that's fine. And if it takes some time, that's okay too…the way I see it, we're always going to be busy. There's always going to be a reason to hold off. But that shouldn't stop us from doing what we want to do."

Meredith leaned in and kissed him softly. "Yeah. You're right."

"So…what are you thinking?", he asked, tucking some hair behind her ear.

"I think that would be a great way to celebrate our anniversary", she said with a genuine smile.

Derek looked at his fiancé and a grin came over his face. "Okay then."

"Okay", Meredith whispered.

"Did we just agree on something without fighting?", he asked with a laugh.

"We did", Meredith giggled.

"You know that making a baby requires double the sex we usually have…", he smirked.

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair. "Does it?"

"Every day. And night", he replied, pulling her onto his lap.

"Fun", Meredith murmured as she pressed her lips against his.

"Lots of fun", Derek agreed. "I want to have some fun with you right now."

"I don't know", Meredith said nervously. "Is it too soon?"

"We can take it slow", he whispered, gently kissing her neck.

Meredith tilted her head to the side. "Hmm…yeah?"

"Mmhmm", he murmured.

"Will you let me do all the work?", she asked quietly, running her fingers through his hair.

Derek laughed against her skin. "I guess I could…"

"Okay then", she whispered. She took his hand and led him out of the kitchen and up the stairs, leaving the food abandoned on the table.

A year ago, neither of them thought they'd be planning a wedding, much less deciding on when to have a baby. Soon they would be husband and wife. And within two years, they could even be parents. It still amazed them how much things had changed for the better, despite all they had been through.

**Reviews make my day!**

**Also, I just wanted to give you guys a heads up. I'm a nursing major in college, which means my free time is dwindling as the semester goes on. I'm trying to write whenever I have some spare time. So if I skip a week here or there, just know that I haven't abandoned this. And I will update ASAP. Writing this helps me keep my sanity, and I love all my faithful readers. :)**


	33. 48 Uninterrupted Hours

**Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.**

**Thanks so much for all of the kind reviews. I really appreciate them.**

**Because they never got their 48 uninterrupted hours in Sonoma, I decided to give it to them. They deserve some happiness.**

It was the beginning of April at Seattle Grace, which meant that along with the arrival of spring, came one month closer to the wedding. It also meant Derek's birthday. To save up vacation time, Meredith and Derek decided to spend Derek's birthday weekend in Sonoma to celebrate.

They had been swamped at work all week, staying overnight more than once, and hadn't been able to pack until the last minute. Now it was nearing ten o'clock at night, and they had just arrived back at the house after going to the trailer so Derek could pick up some clothes and of course, the bag of hair products.

And now, Meredith was rummaging through her drawers looking for clothes to pack, trying not to fall asleep.

"I got your bag", Derek said as he walked into the room with a black travel bag for Meredith's things.

"Thanks", Meredith said through her yawn. She walked over to where he was sitting and tossed everything in, not bothering to make sure it was in there neatly. She grabbed her brush and a small bag of makeup and put them in there as well.

"I think it's kind of funny how I can pack everything I need in five minutes and it takes you an hour", Meredith said with a smirk as she walked over to her panty drawer.

"Aah…mocking me", Derek chuckled.

"I'm just saying…you have a crap load of hair products. You know what I brought? A brush", she giggled, holding up one of her nighties. The kind Derek liked with the tie in the front. "How's this one?"

"Easy access", Derek grinned. "But we're going to be naked the whole time, so I don't even know if you need to pack any of that."

"You can have fun taking it off of me then", Meredith smiled, tossing it to him so he could put it in the bag. "And we're not going to be naked the whole time. Tomorrow is your birthday and I want to make it special."

Derek looked at her and smirked. "I can't think of anything more special than you naked."

"You're an old man now. I don't want to tire you out", Meredith shot back jokingly, picking out some lacy panties and matching bras and adding them to her increasingly full bag.

"Thirty-nine is not old", Derek replied. "And I think you know I'm insatiable when it comes to you. We'll still be having sex in our nineties."

"That's—bad images", Meredith cringed as she walked into the bathroom to retrieve her toiletries.

"Still true", Derek laughed. "Don't forget your bathing suit. We have our very own hot tub on our deck."

"We have our own deck?", Meredith asked in shock. "That wasn't in the brochure…"

"I may have called and requested the suite", Derek said nonchalantly.

Meredith smiled. "This is why I keep you around." She walked back over to her drawer and began digging until she found her black bikini.

"Where'd you get that?", Derek asked. "And can you wear it around the house more often?", he added with a smirk.

Meredith giggled. "I bought it in Hawaii on my honeymoon with Cristina."

"What exactly did the two of you do on that honeymoon?", Derek asked.

Meredith shrugged. "We snorkeled…once. But we spent most of the time on the king size bed eating room service watching the paid cable. The guy who delivered the food thought we were on our lesbian honeymoon. It was actually kind of entertaining."

"Sounds like it", Derek laughed.

"So, what exactly do you do in wine country?", Meredith asked as she straddled his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"We can walk through the vineyards and do some sightseeing. There's a lot of restaurants…"

"And sex", Meredith giggled.

"Lots of sex…all night long", Derek said before kissing her.

"Because it's your birthday…if you behave, I may even let you take advantage of me on the plane", Meredith said with a smile.

"Hmm…Mile High Club…", he grinned. "I've always wanted to be a member."

Meredith zipped up her bag and pushed him back onto the bed so she was lying on top of him. "Me too", she whispered, pressing her lips against his.

"Any chance we can get some birthday sex in tonight?", Derek asked as he rubbed his hands up and down her back.

"It's not your birthday yet", Meredith giggled teasingly.

Derek glanced over at the clock. "An hour and a half. Close enough", he chuckled.

"Fine", Meredith said, kissing him again. "But when I wake up cranky and tired, don't be shocked."

"You're cute when you're cranky anyway", Derek said with a grin as he rolled them over in the bed and proceeded to make love well into the night.

--

The next morning, they drove to the airport in downtown Seattle for their flight to Sonoma. After they had been through baggage and their tickets had been collected, they were finally able to take their seats on the plane.

Derek noticed Meredith clutching the armrest so hard that her knuckles were turning white. "Hey, you okay?"

"I don't like taking off. After we're in the air, I'm fine", Meredith explained, letting out a deep breath.

"It'll be fine", Derek comforted as he kissed her cheek.

"Do they serve tequila on planes?"

Derek laughed. "Mer, it's seven in the morning."

"And…?"

"Hold my hand", Derek said softly.

Meredith quickly accepted it into her own and squeezed it. "Thank you."

"You're welcome", Derek smiled amusedly. "Love you."

"I love you too", Meredith yawned. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks", Derek grinned.

"Once we're on the ground, I'll be more enthusiastic about it", Meredith said, giggling slightly.

"Okay", Derek laughed. "This is a quick flight. Only an hour or so."

Meredith smiled. "That's good." Just then, the plane began taking off on the runway. Meredith squeezed Derek's hand tightly and closed her eyes.

After they were safely in the air, Derek looked over at her. "Mer", he whispered. "You survived. You can open your eyes now."

"Oh thank God", Meredith sighed.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?", he asked.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yeah, it was great."

Derek just chuckled and kissed her cheek.

Meredith yawned. "We can join the Mile High Club on the trip back to Seattle. I'm exhausted from last night." She kicked off her shoes and curled up in her tiny seat, using Derek's shoulder as a pillow.

"You're the one that wanted to go for round two last night", Derek laughed, kissing the top of her head. He lifted up the arm rest so she could get more comfortable, then wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close.

"I didn't see you putting up much of a fight", Meredith giggled.

Derek smirked. "How could I possibly put up a fight when you're naked and horny?"

"You made me that way", Meredith reminded him.

"Sorry", Derek chuckled.

"I guess I can forgive you", she smiled, taking his left hand and lacing their fingers.

"Thanks", he laughed as he pulled her closer and began rubbing her arm. Apparently the white noise coupled with her sleepiness were enough for her to knock her out. Within minutes, he heard the soft snores coming from her small body.

The flight attendant noticed and walked over to Derek. "Sir, would you like me to get a blanket for your wife?"

Derek smiled warmly at the word _wife_. Rather than explain otherwise, Derek simply nodded. "That would be great, thanks."

After she returned with the blanket, Derek graciously accepted it and draped it over Meredith to keep her warm. "I love you", he whispered, breathing in the soft scent of her hair before kissing the top of her head.

Before he knew it, the plane was landing at the airport in northern California. Meredith was in such a deep sleep that she didn't even know that plane had landed until Derek woke her up.

"I survived?", she asked tiredly, rubbing her eyes.

Derek laughed. "Yes, you survived."

--

After they got off the plane, they collected their bags and picked up their rental car. "It smells weird in here", Meredith remarked as they made the short drive to the hotel.

Derek laughed. "I don't smell anything."

"It smells like marshmallows. It's making me gag", she said, scrunching her nose.

"There might be an air freshener stuck under one of the seats or something", Derek replied.

Meredith turned around and put her hand under both her and Derek's seats. "Nope, nothing…"

"I really don't smell a thing", Derek chuckled.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

Just as Meredith was going to check the glove compartment, she noticed the hotel coming up on the right hand side. "Holy crap", she gasped.

"What?", Derek asked confusedly.

"The hotel…it's huge", she said, forgetting all about the mystery smell in the car.

Derek changed lanes and got off at the exit for the hotel. "Where did you think we were staying? Motel Six?", he asked with a laugh.

"Ass", she whispered.

"You can't call me that on my birthday", he grinned. "This is our first vacation together, and I wanted to make it special, that's all."

Meredith just smiled and rested her hand on his thigh. "Thank you…even though it's your birthday and all."

"You're welcome", Derek said genuinely as they pulled up to the valet at the Hilton Sonoma Wine Country.

"Wow", Meredith muttered in amazement. Everything about it was beautiful. It was located in the heart of wine country with miles of acres of vineyards surrounding it. After they checked in at the lobby and all of their bags were brought in, they were escorted to their room.

"Oh my God", Meredith gasped as they entered. "This is a hotel room?"

Derek smiled. "Nice, huh?"

"This bed is huge", Meredith whispered, running her fingers over the cover as she walked toward the bathroom. "We need a tub like this."

"We're _getting _a tub like that", Derek reminded her as he walked up behind her. He snaked his arm around her waist and kissed her neck.

"Think of all the kinds of sex we could have in a tub like this…", Meredith mused.

Derek laughed. "I kind of like the little tub at your house. We're very…creative in there."

"Yeah, but think of all the new positions we could try in here", Meredith giggled. "I'd be all soapy and slippery while you—"

"Stop", Derek chuckled. "Unless you want me to take advantage right now."

Meredith spun around in his arms and kissed him. "It _is_ your birthday…", she said, the naughty glint sparkling in her eyes as she ran her fingers over the front of his jeans.

"Birthday sex", Derek murmured as he pulled her close to kiss her again.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Birthday sex."

--

After they were sexed out for at least the next few hours, they both were getting a little hungry and decided it was time to eat something. Derek said they could just order room service, but Meredith insisted they go somewhere for Derek's birthday lunch. They chose a small restaurant a short drive from the hotel, close to one of the vineyards. It was only noon, so the restaurant was fairly empty, with the exception of a few occupied tables scattered about the place. Luckily, the hostess seated them in a cozy little area by the window that they had to themselves.

"This place is definitely…couply", Meredith remarked after the two were seated. "It's almost too cheesy even for you."

"It's nice here", Derek laughed as they began reading over the menu.

"Want them to sing Happy Birthday to you?", Meredith asked with a giggle.

"No", Derek said shaking his head. "My family always used to do that and I hated it."

Meredith laughed softly but remained silent, which Derek took to mean that no one had ever done that for her as a child. "I'm definitely getting them to sing to you on your birthday."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "No, you're not."

"No really. I am", Derek nodded.

"Okay", Meredith smirked, rolling her eyes.

"Fine, don't believe me", he laughed.

"We'll be married by my birthday…", Meredith said with wide eyes as though it was the first time she ever really thought about it.

Derek smiled warmly and reached her hand. "Does that freak you out?"

"A little", Meredith admitted. "But freaked out in a good way."

"Me too", Derek said with an honest smile, squeezing her hand gently.

After their meals had been ordered and brought to the table, Meredith found herself eating more of Derek's food than her own. "This steak is really good", Meredith said as she took another forkful.

"You've eaten most of it", he chuckled, not that he minded. He'd happily give her all of it if she wanted it.

Meredith took a sip of her wine. "I have not."

"Okay", Derek smiled. "I'm taking some of your crab cake then."

"Fine." Meredith pushed her plate closer to him and slid his closer to her so they were in the middle of the table. "Family style."

"That works for me", he said taking some crab cake off her plate.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you!", Meredith said excitedly, taking another sip of wine before speaking. "I ordered my dress!"

Derek smiled. "Your wedding dress?"

"Yeah. The other day at work I had some free time while I was on call, and I ordered it. I was debating between two, but then I just knew which one I wanted", Meredith explained with a grin.

"Good", Derek said enthusiastically.

Meredith took a bite of his mashed potatoes, giggling as he smirked at her. "You and Mark ordered the suits right?"

"Yeah. I ordered them. Although I think Mark is more interested in the bachelor party than what he's wearing", Derek laughed.

"No strippers", Meredith warned, pointing her finger at him.

"I would never hire strippers", he said as he shook his head.

"_You_ wouldn't. Mark would."

"Do you really think I'd let him get a stripper?", Derek asked with a laugh.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "He's Mark. He'd do it anyway."

"True", Derek sighed, taking a sip of his own wine. "If a stripper shows up, I'll leave. You have my word."

"You can't come see me", she reminded him. "Bad luck."

"I'll go crash in an on call room", Derek said jokingly.

"On the night before our wedding…", Meredith mused.

"Why not?", Derek asked with a shrug.

"Well, for one, they're disgusting", Meredith giggled.

Derek smirked. "And yet, we have sex on those beds at least two or three times a week."

"That's different", Meredith said, eating some more steak.

"How is that different?", Derek laughed.

Meredith thought for a moment before scrunching her nose. "Fine. It's not."

"I like the on call room sex", Derek said with a grin. "It's a nice way to unwind after surgery."

"I've always been a fan of the trailer sex", Meredith sighed, resting her chin on her fist as she thought about it. "We can be as loud as we want and no one can hear us."

"Maybe we should keep the trailer…with kids down the hall, we're going to need a place where we can have loud, screaming sex", Derek suggested as he stole another forkful of food off Meredith's dish.

Meredith smiled. "Hmm…not a bad idea."

"What are you doing about your house?", Derek asked curiously.

"Izzie already said she'd buy it off of me. I think she likes the house more than I do", she giggled. "It's just that…my mom was born in that house, and my grandmother. It'd be weird to just sell it to strangers", Meredith explained softly.

"Yeah", Derek said with a smile and nod.

"Lots of memories, you know?"

Derek gave her a small smirk. "I have some fond memories of your house…particularly the living room floor."

Meredith blushed slightly, thankful that no one was seated near them. "I'm surprised we made it that far", she giggled.

"I'm pretty sure public sex on the porch is illegal anyway", he laughed, pouring both of them more wine.

They were comfortable enough to talk about the past, despite all they had been through. It had only made them stronger and closer as a couple. Maybe the wine was getting to her, or maybe she was just brave today. Brave enough to ask something she'd been wondering about for a while now. "Why me?"

Derek looked at her with a puzzled expression. "What do you mean?"

"There were lots of women in Joe's that night. Why did you pick me?", she asked innocently, genuinely interested.

"Your laugh", Derek said simply.

Meredith smiled slightly but remained silent.

"I don't know what you were laughing at, but you laughed. And I couldn't tear my eyes away from you", he said with a slight shrug. "I just had to come over and talk to you. And you just…you were beautiful—you are beautiful. Your eyes, your smile…the way you could drink shot after shot of tequila without flinching. I knew nothing about you. But still, I fell in love with you right then and there", Derek said with a warm smile, taking her hand and squeezing it gently.

Meredith bit her lip and stared at him. "So my laugh started all of this…us?"

Derek nodded and smiled. "Why do you think I love your laugh so much?"

"You're so getting lucky tonight", she giggled.

"I expected to anyway", he teased, leaning across the small table to kiss her.

"Really?", she asked with a smirk.

"It's my birthday", he replied. "That's like a rule."

Meredith laughed. "I want all this sex on my birthday too."

"I think I can make that happen", he nodded cockily.

"Do you like the gifts I got you?", she asked, smiling slightly. "Besides the sex."

"Are you kidding? You got me the grill I've been talking about for months…and new fishing equipment…"

"With the vest", Meredith added amusingly.

"The vest that you make fun of me for", he laughed. "I'm taking you fishing one of these days—better yet, we're going camping."

"Oh okay…", Meredith agreed sarcastically.

"We are. You just wait", he grinned. "And you got me a new watch", he said, showing off his wrist.

"I would have gotten you a new watch anyway. The minute hand kept breaking on your old one. A brain surgeon should have a working watch", Meredith pointed out, taking a bite of her own meal.

"I appreciate it", he grinned. "Oh, and _The Clash's _greatest hits CD. I love that."

"I'm surprised they even have such a thing. _The Clash_ only had a few hits, and none of them were great", she mocked jokingly.

Derek took a sip of his water. "So mean…", he sighed, shaking his head amusingly.

"I'm giving you a sex weekend. Doesn't that make up for it?", she asked with a smile.

"I appreciate all the birthday sex. And the gifts. Thank you", he said sincerely.

Meredith smiled. "You're welcome."

"So what did you want to get for dessert?"

"We can share something if you wanted…", Meredith offered.

"No, we can each get something", Derek replied as Meredith laid the menu on the table so both of them could make a selection.

Meredith giggled. "And share?"

"Of course", he smiled. "I'm thinking cheesecake."

"If you get cheesecake, I'll get the sampler. It has some of everything", Meredith said with a smile.

"Sounds good to me", Derek chuckled.

"What?"

"It just amazes me that someone so tiny can eat like you can—I love it", he laughed.

Meredith smirked at him. "Are you calling me fat?"

"Oh yeah", Derek mocked.

"I like eating. I may even like it more than sex…", she said teasingly.

Derek looked at his watch. "It's only 1:30. We have all to try out that big bed. Maybe you'll change your mind."

"Maybe", Meredith replied, biting her lip. Getting time away from the hustle and bustle of the hospital was a welcomed treat for both of them. Vacations for a surgeon were rare, so they were going to enjoy every minute of it.

After they ordered their desserts, they left the restaurant and decided to take a small walk through the vineyards. It was a breezy, sunny day; quite the change from the drizzly Seattle days they were used to.

"I don't think I've ever seen you wear flip flops before", Derek remarked as they strolled lazily down one of the long rows of grapevines.

Meredith giggled. "I'm always at work, or just lounging around in socks at home. My bare feet rarely make an appearance."

"You have very cute feet", he chuckled, taking her hand in his own.

"Love you", Meredith whispered as she kissed his cheek.

Derek smiled and kissed the top of her head. "I love you too."

"I think I like Sonoma…", she mused. Seattle was home, but she had to admit, Sonoma had a warm feel that she could easily get used to.

"Me too", Derek agreed. "Shame we already built a house in Seattle…", he said jokingly.

"Yeah…", Meredith sighed before looking at him and smirking.

"I don't know…I've come to like the rain", Derek said with a small smile. "There's something…cleansing about it."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled in agreement. "Yeah."

"It's simpler than New York—calmer. I thought I was going to hate Seattle. And now, I wouldn't move for the world."

"It's hard to imagine you in New York, living in a brownstone and wearing suits to work. It's so not…you", Meredith shrugged, tucking some hair behind her ear. "You're the guy who likes to fly fish, and drink a scotch on the porch, and lounge around in bed on Sundays doing crossword puzzles."

"I like this me more", Derek nodded, giving her a small smile.

Meredith squeezed his hand slightly. "Me too."

--

After they finished their walk through the vineyard, they drove back to the hotel to relax. "You have the key card, right?", Meredith asked.

Derek reached into his pocket and pulled the little plastic card. "Yep." He swiped it through the censor, and heard the lock click open.

"Thank you", Meredith smiled as Derek opened the door for her to enter.

"My pleasure", Derek said with a grin. He followed Meredith over to the king size bed and laid down next to her.

Meredith lay on her side and wrapped her arm around his torso. "It's your birthday. What else did you want to do today?"

"Lay here with you", he said softly, kissing her forehead.

"That's boring", Meredith giggled. "We need to do something fun."

"I believe you promised me birthday sex…", he said as he rolled her on top of him.

"Hmm…I did", Meredith whispered.

Just as Derek leaned down to kiss her, he heard his cell phone start ringing on the nightstand. "Damn", he sighed, kissing her quickly before reaching over to grab it. "It's my mom…her annual birthday call."

Meredith smiled. "Okay." She hopped off the bed and made her way to the bathroom.

"Hey", Derek whispered, holding his hand over the receiver. "Don't go too far."

Meredith giggled. "I have to pee. Just talk to your mom."

"Okay", he smiled before returning to his call with his mother. "Thanks, mom", he replied into the phone.

Meredith took this as her opportunity to slip into her lacy nightie that Derek loved. It seemed as though sex was going to be their only activity, at least for the next few hours, and she at least wanted to get some use out of her lingerie before Derek took it off of her.

Meredith decided that she wanted to torture him a bit, so she walked out of the bathroom with a naughty smile on her face. Derek's breath hitched in his throat when he saw her. The way her long legs seemed to go on forever. The way her honey blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders. The gentle swell of her breasts as she breathed in and out.

She walked back over to the bed and looked at him with a coy smile. She tugged on her bottom lip with her teeth as she spread her legs apart slightly, enough to let him know that she wasn't wearing any panties.

Derek closed his eyes and turned away. He couldn't be thinking about pantyless Meredith while talking on the phone with his mother. That was just wrong. He quickly looked back at her and shook his head amusedly before heading out onto the deck, presumably for some fresh air and to rid himself of his growing erection.

Meredith just giggled and dropped her head back onto the pillows. She loved teasing him. She knew that he'd make her pay for it, and she was fully looking forward to it.

"You. Are an evil woman", Derek smirked as he walked back into the hotel room. He tossed his phone onto the nightstand and crawled on top of her.

"What did I do?", she asked innocently, looking up at him with her sweetest smile.

"You know what you did", he laughed as he began kissing her neck. "Making me think dirty thoughts about you while I'm talking to my mom…evil."

"Hmm…well I'm here now…pantyless and ready for you…", Meredith said with a sigh. The attention Derek was giving her body was already building up the heat inside of her and making her mind all cloudy.

Derek slipped a finger inside her, causing her to let out a small, high pitched moan. "Definitely ready", he groaned. He quickly stripped himself of his clothes before untying the front of her little black nightie. His mouth immediately went to her breasts and collarbone, nipping and sucking on the sensitive spots that he knew all too well.

"Oh God", Meredith moaned.

Derek kissed down her stomach, skipping the place she most wanted to be touched and moving down to her inner thighs, gently kissing and licking her soft skin. "You are so perfect, Meredith", he whispered.

"Derek, please…"

Derek quickly applied a condom and moved back up her body, eagerly pressed his lips to hers, kissing her hungrily. He slowly slid himself inside of her, savoring the feel of being joined with her so intimately. Meredith immediately clenched her muscles around him, making it nearly impossible for him to enter her fully. "Mer", he moaned.

Meredith let out a deep breath and tried to relax around him so he could fill her to the hilt. After he was fully sheathed inside of her, he waited until she was ready before beginning to thrust. "I love you…", he whispered, looking into her green eyes.

Meredith smiled up at him, her gaze so full of trust and love for him. "I love you too."

They moved together in a synchronized rhythm, in and out, until both of them were on edge. Derek knew she was about to climax any second. He could feel it both physically and emotionally. He reached down in between their joined bodies and applied gentle pressure to the tiny bundle of nerves between her legs.

Meredith screamed her release and clung to him as she rode out the powerfully strong waves of her orgasm. "Der…Derek", she chanted, pulsing violently around him.

The feeling of her clenching around him brought Derek right over the edge along with her. He felt himself release and wrapped his arms around her. "Mer…", he groaned. "Oh God…"

After they both came down from their orgasms, they laid in silence trying to catch their breaths. Derek buried his face in her neck. "God I love you so much", he breathed.

Meredith could barely even talk yet let alone move. "I…love you…too", she panted.

"You…okay?"

"I…yeah", she said, trying to regain her normal breathing.

"I love you", he repeated, kissing her neck.

Meredith giggled through her panting. "You…said that…already."

"I know. I just wanted to say it again", he chuckled.

"Love you too", she said with a small smile as the world stopped spinning and things began to settle down again.

Derek kissed her forehead before gently easing himself from her body. He dropped down next to her and pulled her close to him. Meredith kissed his chest softly before laying her head down. As mind blowing as the sex was, the time spent right after making love was just as important to them. Right now, nothing else mattered. It was just them. Together in this time and space, completely content and in love.

"Good birthday so far?", Meredith asked softly.

Derek lazily ran his fingers through her hair and smiled. "Best birthday ever."

**Yay for birthday sex in Sonoma! :D**

**There's still more Sonoma and birthday celebrating to come. This chapter was just getting way too long. I promise to update whenever I can.**

**Reviews make my day!**


	34. Wine Tasting

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy does not belong to me. I'm just a simple fanfic writer.**

**Thanks for all of the kind reviews. I really appreciate them!**

After their love making, Meredith and Derek lounged around in bed for an hour or so, just enjoying the simple, quiet time together. No roommates, no pagers, no alarm clocks. Just each other.

"What do you want to do tonight?", Derek asked, rubbing her still naked back softly.

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "It's your birthday. We can do whatever you want."

"We can just lay here", he suggested.

"We have to do something…besides sex", Meredith giggled.

"I think there's a wine tasting tonight. We could do that, then come back here and order room service if you wanted…"

Meredith kissed his cheek. "You don't want to go out for birthday dinner?"

"We already went out for lunch. Besides, eating in bed with you sounds like much more fun anyway", he grinned.

"Sounds good", Meredith whispered as she sat up in bed. "I'm gonna go take a quick shower first."

"Mind if I join you?", Derek asked with a cheesy grin.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "I can't say no to you on your birthday, can I?"

"That would be mean…", Derek sighed, smirking slightly.

"Okay then. Looks like you get to join me", Meredith smiled, extending her hand.

Derek accepted it and together they made their way into the large bathroom for their next round of birthday sex for the day.

--

After their extensive shower, they got ready for the wine tasting that they would be attending that evening.

Derek was fixing his hair while Meredith walked around the room in her bra and panties, trying to find the dress she knew she packed. "Are you sure you packed one?", Derek called from the next room.

"Found it", she called back, hurrying into the bathroom to change.

"That's a shame. I would have rather you just walked around in your bra and panties", Derek teased.

"Oh yeah, because showing up at a wine tasting half naked is totally acceptable…", she said, her giggle traveling from the bathroom and putting a smile on Derek's face.

"We could have just stayed here…I wouldn't mind if you walked around half naked—better yet, completely naked…", he laughed, sitting down on the couch while he waited for her.

"So dirty…", she sighed, the amusement evident in her voice.

When Meredith emerged from the bathroom, Derek's breath hitched in his throat. She was wearing the black dress she had been wearing the night they first met at Joe's. "Meredith", Derek gasped.

Meredith smiled. "I packed this one because I know how much you love it."

"You look beautiful", he breathed, standing up and kissing her softly. She was wearing very little makeup, which Derek loved about her. Her natural beauty always shone through, even when she was wearing her scrubs and a ponytail. Everything about her was beautiful, inside and out.

"Thank you", Meredith said, blushing softly.

"Never get rid of this dress", he grinned, running his hands up and down her arms.

Meredith smiled at him. "I don't plan on it." She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him.

"Love you", Meredith whispered, resting her head on his chest.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "I love you too. So much."

"Ready to go to this cheesy wine tasting?", she asked with a giggle.

"I am", he chuckled, taking her hand as the two made their way out of the room toward the elevator.

"I hope no one is on this when we get on…", he said as he pressed the elevator call button.

Meredith looked at him curiously. "Why?"

"Because I want to kiss you in there just like at work", he grinned. The doors opened and revealed a completely empty elevator.

"We're in luck", Meredith laughed as the two entered.

As soon as the doors closed, Derek wrapped his arms around her waist and pinned her to the side of the elevator.

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair and kissed him hungrily, wasting no time thrusting her tongue into his mouth.

Derek groaned in response and pulled her closer to him. "Love you…"

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Love you too." She pulled back for a moment to get some air.

"What are you doing?", Derek asked breathlessly.

"Air", Meredith murmured before leaning in to kiss him again. This time he thrust his tongue between her lips and she moaned in pleasure.

Just as she was about to wrap her legs around his waist, the elevator dinged and the doors opened. "Crap", she whispered, quickly pushing him away so she could fix herself.

Derek took her hand and nonchalantly led them off the elevator as an older couple stepped on, both smirking slightly. He chuckled softly and kissed her cheek as they made their way through the lobby to the valet.

"The elevators here are too fast…", he smirked.

"You've got me all hot and bothered now…", Meredith scolded while fixing her dress.

Derek smiled, brushing some hair out of her eyes. "Sorry."

"You are not", she giggled.

"Remind me to do that again when we come back tonight", he said as the valet pulled the rental car up to the entrance of the hotel.

"I'll be sure to do that", she grinned.

Derek closed her car door and walked around to the driver's seat. "Are you going to let me take advantage of you when you're drunk on wine?", he asked amusedly.

"Wine is nothing compared to tequila. I can hold my liquor", Meredith said with a nod.

Derek laughed. "Until you throw up."

"I'm not going to get drunk tonight. There's still birthday things I need to do to you…", she giggled, lightly tapping her fingers on her thigh.

"Do _to_ me, huh?", he asked as he tried to focus on driving rather than Meredith's fingers getting closer to her destination.

Meredith quickly drew back her hand and turned on the radio. "Yep."

"You're evil today", he laughed.

"I am not", she giggled, knowing full well it was a lie.

Derek looked over at her and smirked. "Showing me your…nether region…while I'm on the phone with my mom. I'd say that's evil."

"I thought you liked it down there", she said naughtily, placing her hand back on his thigh.

"I do. But showing me while my mom is wishing me a happy birthday…awkward…", he laughed as he gently squeezed the hand she had on his thigh.

Meredith kissed his cheek. "Fine. I'll stop. Good thing come to those who wait…", she replied.

"Looking forward to whatever you have in store for me", he grinned.

"I have lots of things in store for you, Dr. Shepherd", Meredith giggled as they pulled into the parking lot. "This place looks couply too."

"We'll fit right in then", Derek teased as they exited the car and made their way hand in hand into the fancy little establishment in the heart of one of the vineyards.

Meredith scrunched her nose and looked at him. "We're not like that."

"Actually, we are", he laughed. "You know…vacationing in Sonoma and making out in the elevator…"

"Crap", Meredith groaned.

"Crap?", Derek asked in fake shock. "What's so wrong with being couply?" He held the door open and the two walked inside.

Meredith sighed and smirked at him. "You made me that way…"

"I take full responsibility", he said with a laugh. "And I'll take any punishment you want to give me."

"No more making me horny", Meredith whispered. "Not in here at least…", she murmured.

Derek smirked. "Same goes for you."

"What do you mean?", she asked innocently, biting her lip.

"I mean keeping away from _my_…nether region…", he whispered into her ear, chuckling softly.

Meredith sighed. "I'll do my best, Dr. Shepherd."

--

After an hour of wine tasting, Meredith decided she had enough. She scooted closer to Derek and placed her hand on his thigh. She leaned over and whispered into his ear. "Do you want to get out of here?"

Derek looked over at her and smiled. "I do."

They snuck out while the next round of wine was being poured, sneaking quietly out the front door. "That was fun", Derek smiled as they got into the car.

"It was. I think they wanted to get us all drunk", she giggled. "But now I'm hungry."

"Hmm…hungry for…sex?", he asked, leaning over the console to kiss her.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I was thinking more like actual food."

"Fine. Room service first. Sex later", he grinned as they began the short drive back to the hotel.

"Are you having fun?", Meredith asked.

"Of course", Derek smiled, reaching for her hand. "We need this. It's nice to get away from work…from the stress. And it's good for the two of us to have this time together."

"Yeah. It is", she agreed with a smile. They normally spent time together after work, but it was still nice to have the weekend to spend with only each other. The hospital had been wearing them out lately, especially because both were picking up extra shifts to make up for their honeymoon in July. So forty-eight uninterrupted hours in Sonoma was a welcomed time for rest and relaxation.

After they arrived back in the hotel room, Meredith was ready to let Derek take her right then and there. The kiss they shared on the elevator on the way up to the hotel room made her flushed and frenzied. He picked Meredith up and gently dropped her onto the bed before hovering over her.

Meredith wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him. "Love you."

"Love you too", he murmured, running his fingers through her soft, honey blonde hair.

"Food first", she said as she arched her back into his touch.

Derek chuckled softly. "Food trumps sex?"

"Food and sex are two of my favorite things. But tonight I'm hungry…", she giggled.

"Let's eat then", Derek replied. He kissed her quickly before rolling off of her.

Meredith grabbed the menu out of the drawer and opened it. "I wonder if they have tacos…"

"I'm sure they do", he laughed. "You can get something a little fancier if you wanted…"

"Tacos are fancy enough", she giggled. "Ooh look. Right here. Meat supreme…"

"I'll try one of the subs. They can't be too dangerous", he rationalized.

"I'll share my tacos with you", she smiled, kicking off her heels and lying down on the soft, red comforter.

Derek leaned down and kissed her softly. "Sounds good."

--

"These are the greatest tacos I've ever had", Meredith smiled, taking a huge bite.

"This place won all sorts of awards for their food", Derek informed her, reading the back of the menu. "This sub is pretty good too."

Meredith picked it up off his plate and took a bite. "Mmm, this is good", she said, tossing a stray piece of lettuce onto the tray. "Can we move in here?"

"We need to hire these cooks for our house", Derek joked.

"You're going to be the cook in our house", Meredith giggled. "Unless you want Pop tarts and grilled cheese every night."

"You've gotten better. Remember you made breakfast for us last weekend", he reminded her.

Meredith shrugged. "At least it was edible."

"It was much more than edible. It was good", he said with a smile.

"Thank you", Meredith giggled softly. She wrapped her arms around his torso and hugged him tightly.

Derek looked at her and smiled. "What's this for?"

"Birthday hug", she whispered as she held him close.

Derek kissed the top of her head and hugged her in return. "I like birthday hugs."

"I'm glad I'm in Sonoma with you", she said quietly.

"Me too", he responded. He tilted her chin and kissed her sweetly and tenderly, wanting to savor the intimate moment with his fiancé.

Derek was putting the cart in the hall after they were finished when Meredith walked up behind him. "I think we should put this on the door", she whispered into his ear, handing him the _Do Not Disturb_ sign.

"I think you're right", he grinned. Meredith put it around the door knob and took his hand, leading him back in the room.

"What now, Dr. Grey?", he asked with raised eyebrows.

Meredith smiled and bit her lip. She reached around and untied the back of her black dress before easing it off of her shoulders. "Hot tub?"

Derek grinned. "I'd love to."

Derek quickly got changed and went out onto the partially enclosed deck to set it up for them, and pour them both some wine. The night was breezy and warm, perfect for a soak in the hot tub. When Meredith walked outside, Derek smiled. "Hey."

"Hey", Meredith giggled. "What's all this?"

"We're being couply…hot tub, wine, candles", he grinned. "Ready to get in?"

Meredith nodded and removed her soft, white robe. Derek's breath caught in his throat as he stared at her. "Wow…"

"I'm uh…a little self-conscious in this", she admitted shyly.

"Why? You look beautiful", he gasped, admiring her body from top to bottom. She looked breath-taking, the way her soft, milky white skin shone in contrast to the black material of the bikini. "We're getting a pool."

Meredith giggled. "When are we going to have time to go swimming?"

"I don't know…but it'll give you an excuse to wear this more often", he grinned as he rubbed his hands up and down her sides.

"You really like it?", she asked softly as they both stepped into the warm, bubbling water of the hot tub.

"You look gorgeous—you always look gorgeous though", he grinned, pulling her close to him.

Meredith pressed her body close to his and kissed his cheek. "You're sweet."

"I'm serious", he chuckled. "You always look beautiful. I can't wait to see you on the wedding day."

"I'm already getting excited, which is weird because I rarely get excited about things", she said with a small giggle, taking a sip of her wine.

Derek kissed her bare shoulder. "I'm excited too."

"And for the honeymoon", she added happily.

"Hmm…Italy", he sighed, a smile coming over his face.

Meredith closed her eyes and leaned against him. "Italy…", she repeated.

"Under the Bridge of Sighs", Derek said softly, kissing her forehead.

"You remembered", Meredith beamed, smiling slightly.

"Of course I remembered", he chuckled. "And I can't wait to go under it with you."

"Me either", she replied.

"Getting in a gondola with you sounds like fun…"

"I think I'm going to like honeymooning with you", she commented idly as she swirled her finger through the water.

"Honeymoons require a lot of sex", he said with a smirk.

Meredith looked at him amusedly. "So I've heard..."

"I think it's part of the vows actually", he replied, refilling their wine glasses.

"To have and to hold and give endless sex to your beloved on your honeymoon?", Meredith giggled jokingly.

Derek nodded. "Exactly."

"Well we wouldn't want to break tradition", Meredith said with a smile.

"No. We wouldn't", Derek agreed.

"I really love you Derek", she blurted out before blushing. "Okay, I don't know where that came from—maybe it's the wine or something…"

Derek swung her legs over his lap and looked at her warmly. "I really love you too, more than you'll ever know."

"I think I might know", she said softly, moving to fully sit on his lap.

Derek wrapped his arms around the small of her back and pulled her close. Meredith pressed her forehead against his and smiled. "We need a hot tub too."

"A hot tub, a pool, and a trampoline…", Derek commented, rubbing small circles on her back that was emerged in the water.

"Do we really need a pool of we're getting a hot tub?", she giggled as she shivered slightly.

"The pool can be for the kids. You and I can use the hot tub", he grinned, gently nibbling on her earlobe.

Meredith moaned softly. "You're not supposed to have sex in hot tubs."

"Who said anything about sex?", he asked. His hot breath on her neck made her body erupt into goose bumps and she visibly shook on top of him. Derek noticed and quickly wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm just saying…germs", she explained halfheartedly.

"There's lots of other things we can do in the hot tub…", he said huskily, giving attention to her neck.

Meredith tilted her head slightly and swallowed. "Hmm…like what?"

"Touching", he said simply, running his fingertips over her bare stomach. "And kissing…"

"I like the touching and kissing", Meredith replied. She combed her fingers through his hair and smiled.

"Me too", Derek whispered. "Like when I do this…" He eased his hands slowly downward and cupped her bottom.

Meredith took that as her cue and began grinding her hips into his. She could already feel his growing erection beneath her. "And this…"

"Don't start something you won't finish", he groaned, managing to smirk slightly at her. She had been teasing him with sex all day and he knew that once she got him started, stopping wouldn't be easy.

"I plan to finish", she said confidently, running her tongue over the shell of his ear.

"Where?", he asked in a whisper.

Meredith bit her lip and focused her gaze on his blue eyes staring back at her. "On the deck."

"We've never…are you sure?"

"It's your birthday…we may as well make it memorable", she giggled, bracing her hands on his shoulders. "And it's private back here. So no one will see us."

"Well in that case…" Derek reached around and untied the small black strings of her bikini. Her breasts spilled free, exposing them to the breezy night air. Derek immediately took a nipple into his mouth, turning it into a hardened pink peak, before giving the same attention to the other one.

Meredith moaned and panted, her chest heaving as Derek lavished her body with attention. She licked her lips and smiled at him. She then reached into his shorts and ran her fingers over his fully erect shaft. "Mer", he groaned, unable to finish his thought.

"We need to…", Meredith breathed, nodding to her robe.

Derek understood and nodded slightly. Meredith eased off his lap, and though it was a slight struggle, Derek managed to exit the hot tub and retrieve her robe. He held it out for her and she wrapped it tightly around herself.

Meredith walked over to one of the large, cushioned lounge chairs and laid back on it. She opened her arms and Derek eagerly accepted the embrace. He noticed her shiver slightly at the warm wind and looked at her, her eyes full of love and desire. "You okay?"

Meredith smiled slightly and nodded. "Yeah." The body heat radiating off of both of them warmed them up instantly.

Derek leaned down and kissed her hungrily, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. Meredith moaned in pleasure. Her fingers found the drawstring of his shorts and she quickly untied them. They worked together and successfully removed them from his legs, leaving him naked, much to her liking.

Meredith arched her back and looked up at him. "Bottom…off", she panted.

"Okay", Derek whispered. He hooked his fingers in the sides of her bikini bottom and slowly eased them off her legs. The robe was still underneath her, providing her some warmth and protection from the cushion. She gently eased her legs apart, exposing to Derek all she had to offer.

Derek smiled and slipped a finger inside of her. "I think you're ready", he groaned.

"I am", Meredith moaned, bucking her hips as he thrust his finger in and out of her.

Derek removed his finger from her and positioned the tip of his erection against her. "I love you", he whispered, holding still and refusing to thrust.

"Love you too", she breathed, waiting for the moment when he would push inside of her. After several moments, she looked up at him. "Please", she begged.

"Okay", he conceded. He kissed her forehead and sank into her. Her tight warmth made him groan and he went deeper than he thought possible.

Meredith gasped and threw her head back in pleasure. "Derek…"

Derek could feel every part of them so completely connected and paused momentarily. He wrapped his arms around her and breathed her in, enjoying the moment of complete sexual intimacy with his fiancé.

Meredith clenched her walls around him, urging him to move. "Move…please", she groaned, digging her fingernails into his back.

Derek pulled all the way out of her, causing her to whimper and squirm and moan until he filled her once again. He did it over and over and over until both found themselves standing on the edge, ready to let go.

Meredith reached down between them and tugged on his testicles, lightly squeezing. Derek jerked in response, thrusting hard and fast a few more times before he erupted inside of her. The feeling of Derek's twitching manhood sent her over the top and she immediately began contracting her muscles in orgasmic ecstasy. "Derek. Derek. Derek", she chanted, arching her back and thrusting her hips toward him.

"Oh God…Meredith", he groaned as the last of his orgasm washed over him. He wrapped his arms around her and laid his head on her heaving chest.

"That was…", she panted incoherently.

Derek kissed her neck softly. "Incredible", he finished.

"Yeah", Meredith agreed, running her fingers through his hair.

"We just had sex outside", he remarked while both of their bodies began to relax.

Meredith giggled breathlessly. "I like outdoor sex."

"Me too", he said softly. He gently pulled out of her and sat up slightly. He tied the robe around her waist before reaching for his and putting it on. Meredith scooted over on the lounge chair and he dropped down beside her. He then draped one of the large towels over both of them.

He wrapped his arm around her, holding her close to him. "You okay?", he asked softly.

"Perfect", she whispered.

"I love you", he sighed contentedly, burying his face into her neck.

Meredith smiled and kissed his temple. "I love you too."

"You really know how to make a birthday special", he chuckled.

"I tried", she said with a small, tired giggle.

"You definitely succeeded", he replied. "Do you want to go inside?"

"I just want to lay here for a few minutes."

"Okay." Derek leaned over and kissed her tenderly. This was the perfect way to end his birthday.

**I guess my mind was in the gutter after hearing about naked Derek in episode 5.04. So that was probably the reason for the outdoor sex. :D**

**There's still more fluffy Sonoma coming up. I'll update ASAP.**

**Reviews make my day!**


	35. Right Next to Me

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Thanks for the reviews! **

Last night, after their outdoor sex, Meredith and Derek finally made their way back into the hotel room to shower and go to bed. Between all of the sex, activity of the day, and the plane ride, they were exhausted. As soon as their heads hit the pillows, they were asleep within minutes. The next morning, they decided to sleep in. That was something they rarely got the chance to do, and they wanted to take full advantage of the opportunity.

The sun was shining in through the window and pouring over them. Meredith rolled over and curled up into Derek's side. Though he was still sleeping, he instinctively wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close to him. Whether he was dreaming or not, he whispered a barely audible "I love you."

Meredith smiled sleepily and kissed his chest. "Love you too."

Around 11:00, Derek decided he'd been sleeping long enough. He hadn't slept that late in a long time, but it was definitely refreshing. He gently got out of bed and closed the curtains before brushing his teeth. When he came out, Meredith was still sound asleep, sprawled out on her stomach. She was snoring softly and her hair was a mess of wild waves spread out over the pillow. Derek leaned over and kissed the back of her head softly, and then called down for breakfast for them. Breakfast in bed was something she liked, though he knew she would label such a thing as "couply."

He ordered a variety of breakfast foods, knowing that she wasn't very picky and could probably out-eat him if she wanted to. When Meredith heard the knock on the door, she opened her eyes and looked to Derek.

Derek smiled back at her. "Breakfast."

Meredith sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, then glanced over to the clock. It was almost noon and all she had done was sleep. She simply shrugged it off. Her body needed the rest, especially after spending three consecutive nights on call this week. She quickly went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth before rejoining Derek in bed. He had opened the curtains slightly so some light could shine into the room and flipped on the television.

"What did you order?", Meredith asked sleepily as she rejoined him in bed.

Derek kissed her cheek and handed her a cup of coffee. "A lot."

"I can see that", she giggled. She took as sip of her coffee and placed it on the nightstand. "You really know how to make me happy, don't you?"

"I like to think so", Derek smiled with a nod, handing her a fork.

Meredith took it from him and immediately grabbed a forkful of eggs off the plate. "So what do you want to do today?"

"Doesn't matter to me", he replied. "Our flight home isn't until eleven tonight, so we have time."

"It feels like we just got here. I don't want to leave", Meredith frowned, picking up a piece of bacon.

Derek thought for a moment. "I could call Richard…see if we could get tomorrow off."

"No that's okay. I don't want to take advantage. And I already owe Cristina a weekend shift. Being in shift debt—not good", she sighed.

"What time do you have to be in tomorrow?", Derek asked.

"Seven", she informed him, biting into a piece of toast. "What about you?"

"I have a surgery at nine. I'll just go in with you—catch up on paperwork" Derek shrugged.

Meredith smiled. "If I get trapped in the clinic doing nothing, will you let me scrub in?"

"I might…", he replied nonchalantly. Obviously he would let her scrub in, he just enjoying joking around with her.

"I gave you hot outdoor sex on a lounge chair last night. You better let me scrub in", she demanded, giggling slightly.

"That was pretty good, wasn't it?", he smiled, kissing her cheek. "Best birthday ever."

"I brought a gift with me. Do you want it now?", she asked with a hopeful smile.

"Yeah", Derek responded.

Meredith swung her legs over the side of her bed and walked over to her suitcase. After rummaging through for several moments, she eventually found the item in question and walked back over with the neatly wrapped present. "Here you go", she smiled softly. "I um…it's not much, but—anyway, happy birthday."

Derek gave her an assuring smile before accepting the gift from her hands. He slowly opened the small gift and a grin spread over his face as he realized what it was. "Where did you find this?", he asked happily, holding his new black scrub cap, with "The Clash" logo written all over it.

Meredith laughed. "I had it made for you."

"You did?", he asked in shock.

"Yeah. I wanted it to be something special", she admitted, smiling at his happiness.

"You're the coolest", he laughed, kissing her cheek. "It's my new favorite."

"You like it?", she asked with a smile.

"I love it", he said softly. He tilted her chin up with his finger and kissed her sweetly.

"Hmm…", Meredith murmured against his lips. "Really?"

"Really", Derek breathed. "Thank you."

Meredith smiled. "You're welcome."

"I can't believe you actually had this made. That's just—the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me", Derek replied genuinely.

"You can make everyone jealous…even though The Clash sort of sucks…", she mocked lightly, the humor evident in her voice.

"People _will_ be jealous of this", he agreed. "And they don't suck. You just have bad taste in music."

Meredith feigned hurt. "I do not."

"Duran Duran sucks, Mer", he laughed.

"They do not", she argued amusedly.

"Fine", he conceded. "One day, I'll get you your own Duran Duran scrub cap."

"I'd wear it with pride", she said with a nod and a smile.

Derek kissed her cheek. "I know you would."

Meredith wrapped her arms around his torso and hugged him. "I love you."

Every time she said that, he smiled. There was no greater feeling in the world than being in love with Meredith. And he would never take a moment of it for granted. "I love you too." He kissed the top of her head and breathed in the lavender scent he couldn't live without.

"So we need to make plans today…", Meredith insisted, pulling back slightly from the hug and eating a bite of her syrup covered pancake. "We still need to get you a birthday cake too. I wanted to do that last night, but we kind of got sidetracked…"

Derek took a sip of his coffee. "I liked the sidetracking."

"Me too", she giggled. "I'm not sure the room service people will make us a birthday cake though."

"I really don't need a birthday cake", he laughed. "I'm an old man now, remember?"

Meredith smirked. "True. But everybody deserves birthday cake."

"We can just order a lot of desserts…have them delivered", Derek suggested.

"Do you think they have candles?", she asked.

"Are you going to sing to me?", he questioned amusedly.

Meredith laughed. "No. But you need to make a wish and blow out the candles. That's what people do on birthdays, right?"

"Generally, yeah", he agreed. "I'm sure they could get some candles for us."

"Okay", Meredith smiled. "Then what?"

"Horseback riding?", he suggested, smirking slightly.

Meredith looked at him incredulously. "Do you seriously think I'd do that?"

"No", Derek laughed. "Well, how about a carriage ride through the vineyard?"

"They do that?", she asked, spreading cream cheese on her bagel.

Derek laughed at her hearty appetite but said nothing. "Yeah."

"That sounds like fun then. We could bring some wine…", she said as she bit into the bagel.

"We could", he agreed, taking a bite off the eggs. "Maybe we could even have sex in the vineyard…"

"And how would we pull that off?", she questioned.

"We're creative. I'm sure we could find a way", he pointed out with a grin.

"Maybe if we offered the carriage driver a threesome", she joked.

Derek laughed heartily at her remark. "As much as I'd like that…", he teased. "I sort of enjoy when it's just the two of us."

"You just want me all to yourself", she corrected, giggling slightly.

"True", Derek shrugged. "And you still owe me plane sex."

"You'll get your plane sex tonight", Meredith informed him as she finished off her toast.

"That's one good thing about late night flights—less passengers", Derek grinned.

Meredith looked at him and smirked. "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"I wish I could take credit for that, but no. I was running late for surgery, so I just picked whatever was available", Derek explained.

"I'm going to be exhausted tomorrow morning", Meredith said, taking another sip of her coffee.

"When we get home, we can just relax…save the unpacking for tomorrow night", Derek smiled.

Meredith nodded and smiled slightly. "Okay."

Derek kissed her cheek before hopping off the bed. "I'm going to go call and make a reservation for the carriage ride."

"Okay", Meredith replied, licking some syrup off her finger.

"Want me to ask if it costs more to have sex in one?", he kidded.

"No, I don't want you to ask that", she scolded, finishing off her breakfast. "We are not having sex in a carriage. Or in a vineyard. That's just…people are going to eat those grapes. Would you want to eat sex grapes?"

"What are sex grapes?", he asked amusedly.

Meredith scowled at him, but it was quickly replaced with a smirk. "Would you just shut up and call?"

--

Later on that day, after relaxing and getting in another round of sex, they finally left the hotel room and made their way to the vineyard. It was located right next to the hotel, so they decided to take the short walk instead of taking the car over.

"Is this going to be cheesy?", Meredith asked as she and Derek walked hand in hand across the property.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, probably."

"Crap. We forgot wine", Meredith frowned.

"It's all taken care of…", Derek stated simply, a smile on his face.

"Uh huh…", she giggled. "And what does that mean?"

"What do you mean?", he asked.

Meredith looked at him and rolled her eyes. She knew that however much she prodded, he wasn't going to reveal anything. "Nothing", she smiled.

When they came in sight of the carriage, Meredith gasped. "Derek."

"Hmm?", he asked quietly.

"It's…I just didn't think it'd be this…fancy", she explained.

The excitement in her voice made Derek smile. "Of course it is."

In front of them was a white carriage drawn by a horse. It was very Cinderella-esque to say the least, but Meredith still couldn't tear the smile off her face. There was nowhere else she'd rather be than right here with Derek, the love of her life. "Thank you", she whispered, standing on tiptoes to kiss his cheek softly.

"For what?", he asked curiously.

"Uh…this", she said, pointing to the general direction of the carriage.

"Oh. No biggie", he shrugged, greeting the carriage driver with a small nod. He motioned for her to step inside before him. Meredith stepped up into the seat and moved to the far end so Derek could take his place next to her.

After he sat down, Meredith looked at him and smiled softly. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and the carriage driver began strolling through the vineyards. The sun was shining softly over the vast fields, casting everything in a warm glow.

"Too cheesy?", Derek asked, chuckling slightly.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and laced his fingers with her own. "Not so much."

"Okay. Good", he said with a small smile.

Several minutes of comfortable silence passed before either of them spoke. "Derek…", she said in a whisper.

"Hmm?", he responded softly.

Meredith squeezed his hand gently. "Thank you", she breathed.

"Thank _you_", he replied. He tipped up her chin and gave her a passionate but tender kiss.

"Think we'll be back here one day?", she asked honestly.

Derek nodded. "Yeah. Only we need to plan a longer trip next time. Two days isn't enough…"

"We'll be able to take vacations, right?", she asked. "Like, once we eventually have kids, we'll take vacations with them?"

"Of course. We're going to do all that stuff—family stuff. That's going to be our main priority. We'll have our jobs, but family is going to come first. Family is always going to come first", he assured her.

Meredith nodded and moved closer to him. "Okay…it's just that…growing up, family vacations weren't even an option. My mother refused to leave the hospital to tuck me in at night, let alone going to Disney World or something", she explained. "Sorry…I'm ruining the romantic mood here. I'll just shut up…"

"Mer", Derek interrupted, giving her a soft smile. "We're going to be home to tuck our kids in every night. If both of us can't be there, one of us always will be. That's something you don't even have to worry about."

Meredith smiled slightly. "Okay."

"Okay", Derek repeated, kissing her temple. "Want some wine."

"Yeah", she nodded. "Wine would be nice."

Derek reached across the seat and retrieved the bottle of wine and two wine glasses from the small ice bucket.

Meredith took the wine glasses from his hands so he could pour some into each of the glasses for them. When he was done, he put the bottle back into the ice bucket and took one of the glasses from Meredith's hand.

"This is good", Meredith said after taking a sip.

"When I called, I asked them for the best bottle they had", Derek replied. He took as sip, then smiled at her, noticing the pensive look on her face. "What's wrong?"

Meredith turned her head and looked at him. "Hmm?"

"You okay?", he asked softly.

"Yeah", Meredith whispered with a smile. "I just…I'm happy that I'm here with you."

Derek kissed her cheek. "I'm happy that I'm here with you too. We should come back next year."

"We should", Meredith agreed. "Maybe we can come back for the four days we have off for the conferences."

"I'd like that", Derek grinned. "Ninety-six uninterrupted hours is better than forty-eight."

"Think of all the sex we could have in ninety-six hours…", Meredith said quietly, so the driver couldn't hear them.

"Lots and lots", he mused. "Married sex."

"I heard that the sex slows down after marriage", Meredith said with a slight smirk.

"Not in our case. I guarantee you", he grinned.

"You sound pretty sure of yourself", Meredith teased as she inched closer to Derek's body.

Derek laughed. "I _am_ sure."

"Hmm…", Meredith sighed contentedly. She kissed his cheek and rested her head on his shoulder.

Derek kissed the top of her head and smiled. They both enjoyed the comfortable silence of just being together as they strolled through the vineyard, taking in the surroundings and savoring the remaining hours of their peaceful getaway.

--

When they arrived back at the hotel, Meredith ordered two pieces of chocolate cake to the hotel room, along with a candle. While they waited for it to arrive, they packed up their things and made sure everything was ready to go for when they drove back to the airport for their flight that evening.

After the cake was delivered, they sat outback at the small table. The sun was just setting and the day was still warm. Meredith sat next to him and kissed his cheek. "If you want me to sing to you, I'll sing."

Derek laughed. "Really?"

"Okay, no. But it's the thought that counts, right?", she asked with a giggle.

"Yeah", he chuckled. "It's the thought that counts."

"I'll light it for you", she offered. She lit the match and held it to the wick of the small blue candle sticking out from the top of the cake.

Meredith looked at him confusedly as he stared at the lit candle. "What are you doing?"

"Thinking of a wish", he explained.

"That's easy", Meredith shrugged.

"Not as easy as you think", he chuckled.

"Why?", she asked.

Derek smiled. "Because. Who needs wishes when all I need in life is sitting right next to me?" Derek leaned in and kissed her softly before blowing out the candle.

The perfect way to end their forty-eight uninterrupted hours.

**Fluffy enough? I can't help myself. :P **

**I promise the wedding is coming. I have a plan for it, and eventually I'll get it written down. It's just taking me a while because I want to make it perfect for them. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	36. Worth Not Giving Up

**Disclaimer: I do not claim to own Grey's Anatomy.**

**Thanks for all the kind reviews. I really appreciate them.**

It was the beginning of June in Seattle. The weather was getting warmer and it rained less and less every week. But along with the warmer weather came one month closer to the wedding. The wedding was just five weeks away, and both Meredith and Derek busier than they thought possible. Between work and wedding preparation, life never seemed to seem to calm down.

They were picking up extra shifts, so they could take a few days off after returning from the honeymoon to get some things settled in the house. Even her friends were taking on extra hours, so they would be able to spend some time helping them move into the house. Neither Meredith nor Derek had asked for their help; they willingly volunteered. And that was something for which both of them were extremely grateful.

Some days, they were even too tired to drive home, so they spent the night together in the on-call room. They were barely even having sex. As soon as their heads hit the pillow, they were out until morning. It was stressful and sometimes crazy, but neither was complaining. The result would be worth it.

Today, they were both on the same neuro case. The parents of a nineteen year old girl brought their daughter to have surgery on a previously inoperable brain tumor.

"Good morning", Derek greeted as he and Meredith entered their patient's room.

Both of the parents smiled, but their daughter, Bridget, didn't even acknowledge them. Meredith noticed the girl's solemn behavior, but chose not to mention it. After Derek and Meredith had thoroughly explained the procedure to the family, Derek asked, "Do any of you have any questions?"

"I don't even want the surgery", Bridget stated dryly, rolling her eyes.

"No…there's no questions", her mother interjected. "Thank you."

After Meredith and Derek exited the room, Meredith frowned. "What's the probability of this being successful?", she asked.

Derek sighed. "Well, the surgery is risky. But I've done it three times before, successfully."

"She seems pretty down", Meredith said sadly, referring to their patient.

"It's not a routine operation. I'm sure she's worried", Derek said with a nod, leaning against the nurses' station.

"Should I—do you think we should talk to her?", Meredith asked, showing genuine concern for the withdrawn teenager.

"I'm not sure there's much you can do", Derek replied. "But if you wanted to give it a shot, go ahead."

"Okay, well, Bailey asked if I would work for her in the clinic for a few hours today, so after that, I'll talk to her", Meredith explained.

Derek smiled. "Okay. Love you."

"Love you too", Meredith whispered as she stood up on her tiptoes to kiss him before they went in different directions, carrying on with their days at work.

--

Meredith hadn't planned on spending this much time in the clinic. But it seemed like just as one patient was discharged, another was admitted. And now she found herself treating a little five year old boy's arm because all of her interns were busy on other cases.

"Am I gonna be okay?", the small boy asked, whimpering through his tears.

Meredith smiled warmly at him. "You are going to be just fine", she said comfortingly before looking to his parents. "He's going to need a few stitches, but everything is okay." Meredith got up and went to get supplies when her cell phone rang. She flipped it open and tucked it under her chin as she grabbed a suturing kit off the shelf.

"Hello, Ms. Grey?", the woman on the other end said politely.

"Yes", Meredith replied.

"Hello, this is Karen from the dress shop. I just wanted to tell you that your dress arrived today with the alterations. Would you be able to come in sometime this week to make sure the alterations are okay?", she asked.

Meredith bit her lip. "Oh um…yeah. Yeah, I can. Can I come in on Saturday?"

"Sure, dear. That would be great", Karen replied.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, making a mental note so she wouldn't forget. Her mind was packed with so many other things already. "Alright then, bye."

She put her phone back in her pocket and gathered the remainder of supplies before heading back to her patient, whose tears had since been reduced to hiccups. "I'm going to fix up your boo-boo now, okay? You're alright, sweetie."

As she was finishing sewing up the boy's wound, more and more cases piled into the clinic. She was silently cursing herself for volunteering to work in there, because now it seemed as though she'd be trapped in there all day. By the time she finally left and went back into the hospital, four hours had passed, and she was exhausted.

"Hey, you okay?", Derek asked worriedly as he saw her running down the hall.

Meredith stopped in her tracks and turned around. "I really have to pee."

"Okay…", Derek chuckled. She spun on her heel and made a quick right into the women's restroom.

When she emerged several minutes later, Derek was waiting for her at the nurses' station. "Feel better?"

"Yes", Meredith sighed, running her fingers through her hair. "I haven't sat down in four hours."

"Have you eaten anything?", he asked.

"Nope", she yawned. "I'm gonna go get something from the vending machine."

"Mer, you need more than just a bag of chips", Derek said with a small smile.

"I'll get chips and a granola bar then", she giggled. "And a soda."

"That's real healthy", he smirked. "Why don't we go down and get something to eat?"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Fine."

"So what did you do in the clinic?", Derek asked as they stepped onto the empty elevator to go to the cafeteria.

"Lots of stuff…", Meredith replied vaguely. "I stitched, I gave shots, I splinted ankles, I did some tampon training. Well, at first, George was on that case, but I figured that would be mortifying for both him and the girl, so I switched with him."

"Yeah? How'd that go?", he asked. They stepped off the elevator and walked the short distance to the cafeteria.

"I think I did a damn fine job", she said with a giggle.

Derek laughed. "I'm sure you did."

They quickly purchased some lunch and left the cafeteria, opting to sit somewhere quiet. They found an empty gurney in an unoccupied hallway and sat down.

"Oh, my dress is in!", she said excitedly. "I have to go in on Saturday morning to make sure everything is okay with it."

"Five weeks", Derek grinned, leaning in to kiss her.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Yeah."

"Can't wait", Derek said with a soft smile, taking a bite of his sandwich.

"I can't wait for a day off", Meredith giggled. "But I guess getting married is exciting too", she said jokingly.

"You're funny…", Derek smirked.

"You know I'm kidding", she laughed as she popped a chip in her mouth. "We still have a lot to do though."

"All of the big—well, I don't know how big you can call a wedding that consists of fifteen people—but all of the bigger things are already taken care of. It's just the little things", Derek responded.

"Our vows aren't exactly little things", she said, rolling her eyes.

Derek smiled softly and kissed her cheek. "I'm already writing mine down."

"You're—what?", she asked in shock. "How do you find time to do that?"

"It's easy", Derek shrugged. "Just say what you feel."

"I've never been good with…stuff like that", she said with a mouth full of food. "I'll end up rambling, and embarrassing myself."

"I guarantee I will love whatever you write. Even if you ramble", he smiled assuringly.

Meredith scooted closer to him and kissed his cheek. "Okay."

The sound of Derek's cell phone ringing made them both jump slightly, their peaceful quiet being interrupted. Derek got his phone from his pocket and answered it. "Hello?"

After the caller introduced himself, Derek placed his hand over the receiver. "It's the man from the appliance store", he whispered. Meredith leaned her head against the wall and took another bite of her sandwich while Derek talked on the phone. After he hung up, Derek looked at her. "They want to deliver and install this Saturday."

"Are you able to meet them there? I have to go pick up my dress, then I'll come by to meet you there", Meredith said with a nod.

"That's fine. I'm just glad we both have the day off."

Meredith took a sip of her iced tea. "Well, that's what spending three nights in a row on call gets you."

"Are you staying tonight?", he asked.

"Yep. You?"

Derek ran his fingers through is hair and sighed. "Yep. Another on-call room sleepover then?", he asked with a chuckle.

"I guess so", she smiled. "But don't count on sex. I'm exhausted."

"We haven't had sex in a week", Derek pointed out.

"If you want to have sex, fine. Just don't wake me up during it", she giggled jokingly.

Derek laughed. "I'll remember that."

"Good", Meredith teased, looking at her watch. "I still want to go in and see Bridget."

"They were talking about going home…", Derek sighed sadly.

"What do you mean? Without the surgery, she'll die", she said worriedly.

Derek let out a breath. "She doesn't want it. And she's nineteen, so her parents can't force her. I convinced them to think it over, and they could get back to us tomorrow."

"Derek, she has to have it. It's—without it, she won't even make it to twenty."

"She knows that", Derek replied. "Even still, she's saying no."

"I need—I have to talk to her", Meredith said with a nod.

"What are you going to say?", he asked as she hopped off the gurney.

"I just…she can't die, Derek. Not when we can help", Meredith insisted. She threw her trash in the trashcan and kissed his cheek. "Love you."

Derek smiled warmly at her, beaming at her determination. "Love you too…do you want me to come with you?"

"That's okay. I can do it", she said softly, squeezing his hand quickly before making her way down the hall toward the elevator.

--

Meredith walked into her patient's room, biting her lip nervously as she contemplated what to say to her. She noticed that Bridget was sitting in bed watching TV, no sign of her parents anywhere.

"Hi Bridget. I'm Dr…I'm Meredith", she said with a small smile.

Bridget muted the television and smiled at her doctor. "Hi."

"Where are your parents?", Meredith asked.

"I told them that I needed some time to think, so they went home", Bridget replied, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.

"So, uh, Dr. Shepherd told me you didn't want to have the surgery…", Meredith started.

"Yeah", Bridget said simply.

Meredith bit her lip. "Why?"

"I just don't want it", she whispered, facing the window instead of Meredith.

"I know you're scared, but Dr. Shepherd has done this before—successfully", Meredith said with an encouraging smile.

"Look, I know you're trying to help, but it's just—don't. I'm fine", she said with a nod.

_Fine_. Meredith always knew that word would come back to haunt her. "You're not fine. There has to be a reason why you don't want it."

"There's no reason _to_ have it", she whispered sadly.

"Why is that?", Meredith asked gently.

Bridget turned around and faced Meredith, her eyes glossed over with tears. "Please don't shrink me."

"I'm not", Meredith replied quickly, shaking her head. "I just want to understand."

"I don't want to be a burden to my parents. They already think I'm depressed. They already think I'm screwed up. Wouldn't it just be easier this way?"

"I'm screwed up too", Meredith shrugged. "I think we're all a little screwed up from time to time."

"Yeah, and yet you became someone. You're a doctor", she said before noticing her ring. "And engaged. That's more than I'll ever be."

Meredith looked at the sullen girl and felt a twinge of pain in her heart. "It wasn't always that way, you know." Bridget looked at Meredith but said nothing.

"I think you and I are a lot alike", Meredith nodded.

"How?", Bridget asked in a whisper.

"The way you're feeling. I felt that way for a long time", Meredith admitted sadly, taking a seat on the girl's bed. "I didn't think I'd…ever be a doctor. I never thought there was someone out there that would love me for me. In high school, even in college, I was the quiet, misunderstood one. Girls didn't want to hang out with someone like me. Guys never wanted a relationship with me. Sex, sure. Lots of sex in college…", Meredith sighed before stopping herself, noticing how Bridget was laughing slightly. "Sorry. That was sort of inappropriate."

"Anyway, that was all I ever thought I'd have. I got straight A's, just like you do." Meredith noticed the teen looking at her curiously. "Your mom told me that you're in college—math major, right?"

Bridget nodded. "Yeah."

"You have potential. You're bright, and you're kind, and sweet. And I just—I don't understand why you wouldn't want to live", Meredith admitted sadly.

"Because I'm never…going to get what I really want. I don't think I'm ever…getting married or having kids. I'm almost twenty and I've never even had a boyfriend", Bridget said as tears rolled down her face. "Guys don't like me that way. No one is going to want to marry someone like me. So the way I see it, if I'm just going to be living out the rest of my life alone anyway, what's the point?"

Meredith felt her own eyes sting with tears. "I've thought the same thing many, many times in my life. There were times when I wanted to—when I did—give up. I gave up on the idea of finding love before I had ever even experienced it. Stuff like true love just wasn't in the cards for me, you know?"

"Me either", Bridget whispered as she continued to cry.

"The first serious relationship I ever had didn't come until recently for me. Derek, well, Dr. Shepherd, he's my um…"

"He's your fiancé?", Bridget asked in shock.

Meredith nodded and smiled softly. "Yeah. He is. And he's—I didn't think someone like Derek existed either. I didn't think I'd ever call someone the love of my life. But he is. He really is", she whispered, a tear sliding down her cheek. "When I met him, I just…everything changed. For the first time, I knew what it felt like to be loved unconditionally. And I know he seems perfect, with that hair and that smile, but he's not. When I met him, he was damaged too, just like me", Meredith admitted. "But I think we healed each other."

"Yeah?", she asked softly.

Meredith smiled slightly through her tears. "Yeah. So the reason I told you all of this…is because I want you to have the surgery. Because there is someone out there for you. And I know that right now, you don't think so. But if you die, you'll never have your chance to find him. You won't get the chance to find love. He's out there waiting for you. So please, don't give up."

Bridget nodded and buried her face in her hands as she wept. Meredith hugged the girl and let her cry on her shoulder. She heard footsteps walking into the room and looked up to find Derek staring at her in amazement. He cocked his head slightly and blinked.

Meredith simply smiled and nodded, letting Derek know that Bridget had agreed to have the life-saving surgery. Derek felt his heart swell with love for her and he nodded. "I love you", he mouthed.

Meredith smiled and mouthed back, "I love you too."

--

Later on that day, Bridget had her surgery. And of course, it had been a success. When Meredith checked on her in recovery, she smiled at her doctor. "Thank you, Dr. Grey."

Meredith took the girl's hand and squeezed it softly. "Thank _you_. Thank you for not giving up."

After Meredith did her post-op exam, Bridget's parents stopped her in the hall. "Bridget told us that you were the one to convince her. And we're just—thank you. Thank you so much", her mother cried, pulling her in for a hug.

Meredith was slightly startled, but just smiled and hugged the woman back. "You're welcome", she said humbly. Meredith didn't feel as though she did anything heroic. She just did what she had to do. If anything, her talk with Bridget made her more grateful for Derek, and the love they shared. A few years ago, she didn't believe in love or soul mates or forevers. Stuff like that probably existed, but she'd never have it.

But then, life proved her wrong, and she found the only person who could make her believe. She couldn't imagine her life without Derek. And she didn't want Bridget to give up on her own chance at finding that kind of love. Because that kind of love didn't come around that often. But when it did, it changed your life forever.

--

When Meredith's day shift was over, she made her way to the on-call room that she and Derek usually slept in together. Her day had been long and tiring, and she wanted nothing more than to fall asleep in Derek's arms. She was hoping to God that her night on-call would be quiet, so she could actually get some well deserved rest.

"Hey", she yawned as she shuffled into the room, pulling the hair tie out of her hair and putting it on her wrist. She quickly took her shoes off and put them next to the bed.

Derek smiled. "Hey."

"I'm exhausted", she said, crawling in bed next to him.

"Me too", Derek agreed. "How's Bridget?"

"She's good", Meredith nodded, smiling slightly.

"What did you say to her?", Derek asked. He kissed her forehead and pulled her closer to him.

Meredith melted further into his arms when he began rubbing her back. "A lot of things", she said tiredly.

"Oh, come on", he chuckled. "You have to tell me how you convinced someone to have surgery. That's not easy to do."

"We just…talked", Meredith said simply. "She wasn't scared about the surgery. She was scared about what would happen afterward…the rest of her life. She figured that dying was better than spending the rest of her life alone."

Derek looked at her confusedly. "Why would she be alone?"

"For the same reasons I thought I'd be alone", she replied honestly. "She didn't think she'd find love. And yeah, I know that finding a man isn't the most important thing in life, but…you can't help but think about things like that. She'd already given up hope before she could be let down. It's…easier that way, I think. I had the same thoughts running through my head at her age", she confessed sadly.

"You did?"

Meredith nodded slightly. "Yeah", she whispered. "I never thought I'd…fall in love, or plan this life that involved a husband or kids. That's not me. But then I met you. And all of that changed. And I just…I didn't want her to give up on that. Because it's—it's just something you don't want to give up on."

"So because of you, she not only gets to live, but you gave her a reason to _want_ to live", Derek smiled, his face full of love and pride for her.

"I just didn't want her to die", Meredith said softly.

Derek pulled her on top of him and kissed her. "And _that_…is why I love you."

Meredith smiled. "Are you trying to get sex from me?", she asked as she ran her fingers through his hair.

"No", Derek laughed. "I just don't want you to fall off the bed, so we're switching sides. I'd rather me fall off than you", he said as he rolled her onto the inside of the small bed.

"You're sweet", Meredith giggled. She wrapped her arm around his waist and pulled him up against her body.

"You're not going to accuse me of being corny?", he asked jokingly.

Meredith kissed him softly and smiled. "Hmm…not tonight."

"I love you", he whispered. He brushed some hair off her face and kissed her forehead.

"I love you too."

Together they fell asleep in the comfort of each other's arms, both grateful to have found the love that was worth not giving up on.

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	37. Need for Privacy

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy does not belong to me.**

**Sorry for the wait. My laptop wasn't cooperating. Thanks for the reviews! Enjoy. :)**

After Meredith went to the dress shop to pick up her wedding dress, she quickly drove back to her house and placed it in Izzie's closet, where she knew Derek wouldn't see it. Then she left the house again, stopped off for some coffee for herself and Derek, and made her way out to the new house, where the appliances were being delivered. This was their first day off in almost three weeks, and though they were hoping to sleep in, that just wasn't happening today.

Meredith parked her jeep by the trailer and ran out to the house holding her bag and two cups of coffee. "Hey", she greeted, kissing Derek's cheek.

Derek smiled and accepted the coffee. "How are you?"

"Good", Meredith yawned. "I just picked up my dress. And then I got coffee because I know we're both exhausted and could use some caffeine."

"Good thinking", Derek laughed as he took a sip.

"Are they going to be here soon?", Meredith asked curiously.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, they just called. They're going to be here any minute."

"How long is this going to take?", she questioned.

"It shouldn't take that long. They just have to install things in the kitchen, and some of the faucets. No more than two hours", he shrugged.

"Okay", she yawned.

"Tired?", he asked with a chuckle.

"Very", she groaned, running her fingers through her hair. "I need to do some grocery shopping today too."

"We could do that after this", he suggested.

Meredith giggled. "You've never been grocery shopping with me…"

"Well, do you have a list?"

"List? No. I just go in and toss things in the cart that I need", she shrugged.

"Hmm…good method", he said with a smirk.

"It is", she agreed, standing on her tiptoes and kissing him.

"We haven't had sex in a week, you know…", he reminded her.

Meredith took a sip of her coffee. "That's weird."

"Very weird…", he agreed.

"Sleep has been trumping sex lately", she pointed out.

"That's because we haven't had a day off in a long time", Derek laughed.

"And the one day we get one, we have to come out here to watch people install things", she said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm hoping it doesn't take that long", he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"Here comes the truck", Meredith yawned.

The delivery truck pulled into the recently paved driveway and the men opened up the back hatch before greeting both Meredith and Derek. After everything was unloaded, the two led them into the house and into the kitchen, where they would be installing the refrigerator, dishwasher, and oven.

Meredith looked at all of the new appliances and looked to Derek. "Are we supposed to stand here while they do this?", she asked quietly.

Derek shook his head. "We can walk around the house if you wanted…", he suggested.

"Okay", Meredith smiled. After the men began installing the appliances, Meredith and Derek left the kitchen and went outback on the patio.

"I like it out here", Derek said happily, wrapping his arm around her waist.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and looked at the city below them that seemed to go on forever. "Me too", she said softly. The two remained in silence for a few moments before Meredith spoke again. "So what are we doing about the trailer?"

"I guess we really don't need it anymore", he reasoned.

"Well, maybe we can keep it there until after the wedding. We should probably have a bathroom nearby.", she pointed out.

Derek kissed the top of her head, inhaling her soft scent. "Sounds good."

"Only five weeks now", Meredith said with a small smile.

"Can't wait", he grinned.

"When are we moving in here?", she asked softly.

"Whenever we want to. Of course, we should probably get some furniture…", he mused.

Meredith looked at him and giggled. "I guess it would be nice to have a bed, maybe a couch."

"I think so, too", he said amusedly. "We can start ordering furniture and stuff now I guess. We could just hold off on having it delivered until after the wedding. Unless you wanted to do it now."

"I want to sleep here on our wedding night", Meredith told him with a smile. "So maybe we can just do our bedroom."

"Sounds good to me. Although there will be no sleeping going on that night", he smirked.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Fine. I want to have wild, married sex here on our wedding night", she said amusedly.

"That sounds better", he chuckled as she yawned again. "I think you've yawned fifty times in the past ten minutes", he pointed out with a laugh.

"It's all your fault", she retorted. "You were on-call last night, and apparently I can't get a good night's sleep unless you're next to me."

"If it makes you feel better, I couldn't fall asleep either", he chuckled.

Meredith smiled. "Is that pathetic?"

"Probably", he replied jokingly. "But it's the truth."

Another hour passed before the men finished installing the appliances. By now, Meredith and Derek had migrated back into the house. It was surprisingly warm outside, and the sun was getting to them. They opted instead to sit on the living room floor, not having any other option due to lack of furniture. Meredith even dozed off for a bit as she lay on the carpet, her head resting on Derek's thigh.

When the men announced that they were done installing everything, Derek woke Meredith up, though she swore she wasn't asleep, just resting her eyes. After making sure that everything had been installed just as they wanted it, Meredith and Derek locked up their house and left.

They made a quick stop at Meredith's house to drop off her car before driving to the food store. "You're going to regret going with me…", Meredith pointed out with a smirk.

Derek looked over at her briefly. "Why is that?"

"Because. After you see what a bad shopper I am, you're never going to want to go back with me. That and I'm hungry. It's never good to go grocery shopping on an empty stomach", she replied as she turned the air on in Derek's car.

"Why didn't you eat anything?", he questioned.

"I wasn't hungry then", she shrugged. "And why is it so hot today?"

"It's only the beginning of June. If it's warm today, imagine how hot it's going to be in July for the wedding…"

Meredith giggled. "It'll give you more of a reason to get me out of the dress quicker."

"True", he said with a laugh as they pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store. "Maybe we can sneak away during the reception for a quickie."

"Hmm...maybe", she mused, leaning over the consol to kiss him.

After exiting the car and walking to the entrance, Derek got a cart and they walked inside. "So...do you at least have an idea of the things you need?"

"Izzie always makes a list. I guess I'm more of a spontaneous shopper", she giggled.

"Mmhmm", Derek chuckled as they walked by the produce section. "Fruit?", he asked.

"Do _you_ want fruit?", she asked back.

"Everybody needs fruit in their house", Derek said with a smile. He walked over and bagged some apples and grapes.

"You _would_ think that", she mocked as he put them in the cart. "We need snack foods…"

"Okay", Derek laughed as they walked down one of the aisles.

"Cookies", Meredith said as she walked over the selection and reached for a bag of Oreos along with a bag of oatmeal raisin. "These are your favorite, right?"

Derek smiled. "They are."

"Chips…Alex and Izzie like barbecue", Meredith said as she scanned the shelf.

"Right here", he replied. He got them off the shelf and tossed them into the cart. "What kind do you like?"

"Barbecue is fine with me", she yawned. "We need cereal."

"Okay", he smiled as they walked down the next aisle. "Muesli for me. And the sugary kids stuff for you…", he teased.

"Lucky Charms is pretty damn good. You just don't give it a chance", she giggled, putting the box into the cart.

"Am I missing out?", he asked amusedly.

"Yep. You are", Meredith nodded as she thought of what else they needed. "Okay, tissues and napkins. Cheese, ketchup, bread, ice cream. Izzie needs flour and frosting. Oh, we need dish soap too. And I think we need milk", she responded.

"We do", he agreed. "And coffee."

"Crap, I forgot all about that…"

"I guess it's a good thing I'm here", Derek gloated.

"Guess so", she giggled.

After retrieving those items, Meredith stood in the aisle and tried to remember what else they needed. She twisted the ends of her hair and stared into the cart contemplatively. "See, this is why you should make a list…", Derek chuckled, crossing his arms.

"I don't need one. Just give me a minute", she retorted. "Ooh, toothpaste. And Izzie wants this brand of spaghetti sauce", she said, reaching into her pocket for the post-it note she had given her.

"I'll get this if you wanted to go get the toothpaste…", Derek suggested.

"Okay", Meredith nodded, yawning again. They got the items and met back at the cart, trying to remember the last of the items they needed.

"Oh, we need tampons…you don't have to go with me to get those if you don't want to. Apparently, guys find that traumatizing", she remarked, thinking back to how difficult it was to get George to buy them.

"I'm going to be your husband in five weeks. Buying your tampons is practically a husbandly duty", he laughed as they walked toward the aisle.

"Aw, thank you", she smiled. "You know I'm going to hold you to that…"

Derek kissed her cheek. "I want you to."

After Meredith picked out the box of tampons, she looked to Derek. "Do you need anything? Hair gel? Mousse?"

"You're funny", Derek smirked. "Mocking me after I so nicely came down the feminine product aisle with you…"

"You're right. Sorry", she giggled apologetically. "But you do need shampoo. The bottle is almost empty."

Derek smiled, surprised that she picked up on that subconsciously. "Yep. I do."

"And I need conditioner", she said as they reached the aisle. She quickly grabbed her usual bottle of lavender conditioner off the shelf and placed it into the cart.

"You can never change conditioners", Derek chuckled, putting his own shampoo in with the collection of accumulated groceries. "I don't think I could live without that scent."

"I promise you I won't", she giggled. "What else do we need?"

"Uh…earplugs", Derek remembered.

Meredith blushed slightly before laughing. "Okay."

"What?"

"Nothing, it's just…last week at work, Izzie said she needed a pair too", Meredith informed him as they went down the adjacent aisle for the earplugs.

"Why…? Oh, because of…", he said with a nod. "Yeah, that's embarrassing."

"She said hearing her friend and boss going at it was slightly disturbing", she giggled.

"It's a good thing we're moving out soon…", Derek chuckled as he grabbed two packs of earplugs off the rack and dropped them into the cart.

"Yep. I guess it is", Meredith smiled. "So do we have everything?"

"You tell me. Is everything scratched off your mental list?", he asked with a smirk.

Meredith swatted his arm playfully. "Shut up", she giggled, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, I think we're done."

"Okay", Derek smiled. They walked to one of the checkout lines and set the items on the conveyor belt. As Meredith pulled money out of her tote bag, Derek stopped her. "I got it."

"It's okay. Alex, Izzie and I always split it three ways", Meredith shrugged.

"I got stuff too. Just let me pay for our share at least", he said with a smile, pulling out his wallet.

Meredith thought of arguing with him, but noticed the annoyed look on the cashier's face, and decided against it. "Okay", she nodded, tossing her own wallet back in her bag.

After they bagged the groceries and packed them in the car, Derek buckled his seatbelt and looked at her. "Are you mad at me?", he asked with a small smile.

"What? No", Meredith assured him, shaking her head. "Why would I be?"

Derek shrugged. "No reason. So, I was thinking…maybe we should get a joint checking account—I mean, if you wanted to."

"Yeah?", Meredith asked softly.

They stopped at a red light and Derek looked over at her. "Well, it would keep us from arguing in the checkout line", he said with a laugh. "I just think it makes sense for us."

"I don't make nearly as much as you do though", Meredith pointed out.

Derek shrugged. "It's not about that. It'll just be easier for us, that's all. With bills and just everyday things once we get married, start a family…and God forbid something happens to one of us, everything goes straight to the other person."

"Yeah, okay", Meredith nodded.

"Yeah?", he asked.

"Yeah. I think we should", Meredith said confidently. "It's a good idea."

"Okay", Derek smiled, reaching over the console and taking her hand.

With her free hand, Meredith turned the air on in the car. "I swear, if it's this hot on our wedding day, we're getting married in the house", she joked.

"And then we can show the guests outside, while you and I have a pre-reception party in our bedroom…", he grinned.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "We'll see", she said with a laugh, wondering to herself how much she even believed it. Surely, if they were clever enough, they could find some means of sneaking away unnoticed.

Derek looked over at her and smirked. "You say that now…"

--

Later on that day, Derek unexpectedly had to go back into work for an hour or so to check on one of his more critical post-op patients. When he arrived back at the house, he noticed Meredith was walking barefoot around the kitchen in a pair of boy-cut panties and a tight camisole tank top that clung to her body. He watched as she got the ice cream out of the freezer and shoved her spoon in the carton.

Derek chuckled and walked into the kitchen. "Hey."

"Hey", she said with a smile, walking over to kiss his cheek. "I turned the air on…"

"I was hoping you would", he laughed. "I like the outfit."

Meredith bit her lip and looked down at herself. "I was hot", she shrugged, spooning some of the strawberry ice cream into her mouth.

"You look adorable", he said with a grin. He pulled her close and kissed her. "And you should definitely wear this more often…"

"I'll keep that in mind", she giggled. "Want some ice cream?"

"Sure", he replied.

Meredith put a spoonful into his mouth before kissing him again. "Good?"

"Hmm...", Derek smiled. "You're making it tough for me not to take advantage of you right here in the kitchen, you know."

"You can take advantage of me later on. But first, we have to figure something out. Tonight, the caterer called to make sure all of the menu orders were right, which got me thinking about the guests. And then I remembered that Addison and your mom are flying out here and need a place to stay, which is something we never even talked about.", Meredith rambled.

"Addie and my mom can stay here. Izzie and Alex could share. Addison can take Izzie's room, and my mom can take our room."

"Yeah?"

Derek shrugged. "Yeah. Addie and my mom can do some catching up."

"Your ex-wife and your mother having a girls' night…in my house…never thought I'd see that day", she giggled.

"They'll be fine. Izzie is a good hostess", Derek said with nod.

"It'll probably be her house one day anyway. She wants to buy it off me—not right now, but eventually", Meredith explained.

"That's good. You get to keep it in the family. Well, pseudo-family", he chuckled.

"It's better that way. I know she'll take care of it. I wouldn't sell it to just anyone", Meredith said, taking another spoonful of ice cream.

"I like this house", Derek said with a smile. "I think I'd miss it if you gave it up."

"Me too", Meredith replied. "So you'll call your mom and Addison to tell them the plan?"

"Yeah, I'll call them", he nodded.

"Good. So how was work? Is your patient okay?"

"She's fine. I thought I might have to go back in and operate, but she stabilized", Derek said as he picked her up and sat her on the counter. "What did you do tonight?"

Meredith set her ice cream down next to her and smiled. "Are you trying to take advantage of me?"

"Hmm…maybe…", he whispered. He rubbed her bare thighs with his hands and kissed her.

"Well, first I turned the air on because I was hot…then I got a shower…and then I put this on because I knew you would like it…", she explained half-heartedly.

"I do like it", he said, kissing her jaw line before moving to her neck. "But I think I'd like it off even more…"

"Yeah?", she asked, closing her eyes and tilting her head back.

Derek ran his fingers through her hair. "Mmhmm…"

"Here?", she asked. She didn't wait for an answer as she began working at the buttons of his jeans.

"In the kitchen?", he questioned, pulling back slightly to make sure he understood what she was suggesting.

Meredith shrugged. "It's been a week. Why not?"

"I like how you think", Derek chuckled. He assisted her in removing his jeans, and within seconds, they were on the floor, followed by his boxers.

Derek hooked his fingers in the sides of her panties and Meredith lifted up slightly so he could take them off. Meredith parted her legs and wrapped them loosely around his waist, gasping when he slowly pushed himself inside of her. "Oh Derek…", she moaned in pleasure, gripping the edge of the countertop with her hands.

"Mer", he whispered, overwhelmed at the feel of her. "God, I love you", he moaned.

Meredith leaned in and kissed him, whimpering slightly into his mouth as he pulled out almost completely. She moaned loudly as he thrust back into her, her mind dizzy with the great physical pleasure and love they were sharing.

Just as she starting clenching her muscles around him, something that drove him completely crazy, they heard the front door open, followed by the sound of voices. Meredith looked to Derek and froze in place. "Oh God", she whispered. "Derek."

"Damnit", he cursed. He regretfully eased himself from her and helped her pull her panties back up. She remained sitting on the counter, still slightly flustered from being interrupted in the heat of the moment. Derek pulled up his pants over his still throbbing erection and faced away from her, attempting to calm himself down.

Alex and Izzie walked into the kitchen and saw the two of them panting slightly, obviously up to something. Izzie immediately figured out what must have been going on and gasped. "You two were having sex in here!", she said knowingly.

"What? I—no", Meredith said, shaking her head quickly.

"Oh you so were", Izzie argued.

"Dude, sorry", Alex said awkwardly, noticing Derek still facing away from them.

"We, uh, we'll just come back", Izzie replied, almost amusedly. She and Alex walked out of the kitchen, leaving Meredith and Derek alone once again.

"Oh God", Meredith groaned. "Well if that isn't mortifying, I don't know what is."

Derek sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Yeah."

"I'm glad I kept my shirt on", Meredith replied, looking down at her body.

"I really hate your roommates sometimes", he said jokingly. He really couldn't be annoyed or angry at them. It was their house too, and they just happened to get caught having sex in the kitchen.

"Five weeks until no more roommates", Meredith reminded him as she hopped off the counter. Derek steadied her as she lost her balance slightly, still trying to come down from her sex haze. "Five weeks until no more coitus interruptus…"

"Looks like we're not meant to have sex any time soon", he grumbled.

Meredith bit her lip, looking at the still present bulge in his pants. "We're having sex. Upstairs. Now", she demanded, taking his hand. "I'm still horny."

"Okay…", Derek replied, letting her pull him out of the kitchen.

"Alex! Iz!", Meredith called as they walked up the steps. "Derek and I are about to have sex! And there's a good chance it's going to be loud! Just thought I'd let you know!"

Derek looked at her and laughed. "Feisty. I like it", he grinned, as they reached the landing.

Meredith pulled her shirt off and looked at him. "Bedroom."

"Bedroom", Derek echoed, walking backwards as she planted a firm kiss on his lips.

When they pushed the door open and walked inside, Meredith fell back onto the bed and pulled her panties off. "You better be naked and inside of me in ten seconds", she panted, dropping her head back onto the pillows.

Derek smiled at her before following her orders. Within moments, they were picking up where they left off in the kitchen. Once they moved into their own house, they could have sex anywhere they wanted without any interruptions. They would finally have privacy. Something they both desperately wanted.

**Reviews make my day!**


	38. Gala

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no, it's not mine.**

**Thanks for the reviews. I really appreciate them. **

Three weeks to go. Three weeks until they were husband and wife. It was amazing and crazy all at the same time. Ninety percent of the wedding preparation was done. Just the little details remained. This morning, Meredith was mentally going over the numbers in her mind when she realized they would be uneven at the tables.

She met Derek outside the OR after his surgery with a panicked look in her eye.

"What's wrong?", he asked worriedly, leading her into a quiet hallway.

"It's uneven", she said quickly. "I was going over the seating in my head when I realized we need one more or else it's going to look stupid. And then I thought about Addison. Is she bringing a date? I don't mind if she does. We just have to add to the food orders and add an extra chair to the table."

Derek breathed a sigh of relief. "God, you scared me", he chuckled softly.

"Don't laugh", she scolded. "This is serious."

"Addison isn't bringing anyone. When I called her last week to tell her she could stay at the house, I asked her. She said she's not bringing anyone", Derek explained.

"Okay, well then, we still need someone else", she said, running her fingers through her hair.

Derek thought for a moment. "How about Adele?", he suggested. "I'm sure she'd love to come."

"Crap. How could we not have invited her in the first place. She probably thinks I'm a bitch", Meredith pouted, banging the back of her head against the wall.

"I doubt she thinks that", Derek assured her. "I'll go in and ask Richard later on. Right now, I have to head on over to post-op."

"Okay", Meredith breathed, standing on her tiptoes and kissing him.

Derek wrapped his arms around her and kissed her cheek. "Crisis averted."

"Hmm…I love you", she whispered.

"I love you too", he replied softly as they pulled back from their embrace.

"I'm all flustered. I need to unwind at lunch. On-call room, okay?", she asked, smiling slightly.

Derek grinned. "I'll be there."

"Okay. Bye", she said, squeezing his hand gently before heading off down the hall to resume her day at work.

--

As it turns out, Meredith wasn't just flustered over the wedding preparation. She was also hornier than usual today. She blamed the clinic. There had only been a few patients filtering in and out all day, which gave her plenty of time to think about other things, like the table crisis. But ever since that had been solved, she had been thinking about her pending lunchtime rendezvous with Derek. Which got her to thinking about sex. And thinking about sex when you were supposed to be a surgeon wasn't exactly making her job any easier.

Meredith filled out the last of her charts and pushed them to the side. She made sure her interns were stitching and splinting correctly before nonchalantly grabbing a _Cosmopolitan_ magazine off one of the tables in the waiting area and sitting back down at her spot behind the nurses' station. It wasn't exactly productive work, but she figured she owed it to herself to relax for volunteering down in the clinic as a favor to Dr. Bailey.

She flipped open the magazine and happened to turn to a page on sex positions. Meredith decided to have a little fun so she pulled out her Blackberry. She wasn't sure if Derek was in surgery or not, but still, that didn't stop her from sending him a dirty text about something she read in the magazine, saying she couldn't wait to try it out today at lunch. She giggled slightly to herself after pressing send, hoping he'd text something equally dirty back to her.

Sure enough, minutes later, her phone signaled a new message and she quickly flipped it open to see what he wrote back to her. Meredith blushed slightly and bit her lip, texting him something about how she'd be waiting for him in the on-call room naked and on all fours.

"Well, well, well. Grey has a kinky side. Who knew?", Mark asked amusedly as he stood behind her, reading the text she had just sent back to Derek.

Meredith jumped a bit in surprise before turning bright red. "You're such an ass."

"I'm your boss", Mark reminded her, unable to hide the smile on his face.

"Yeah. And you're also an ass", Meredith smirked, shutting the Blackberry and putting it in her pocket. "What are you doing here?"

"One of your idiot interns paged me. Something about facial sutures", Mark explained, looking through the stack of charts on the counter.

"Oh", Meredith replied. Her pocket vibrated and she pulled her phone out of it. When she made sure Mark wouldn't be able to see what Derek had written to her, she opened the message and giggled, blushing again.

"Working hard, I see", Mark commented jokingly, scribbling down some notes.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "I _volunteered_ to work in here today, and so far I've written a prescription for pain medicine and stitched up a drunk man's arm who kept hitting on me."

"Sounds like a good time", Mark grinned as he made his way over to one of the curtains to help Meredith's intern with the sutures.

"Oh yeah", Meredith said dryly, leaning back in her chair.

"Have fun with your dirty texting", Mark called out to her.

Meredith blushed again. "Shut up", she hissed, spinning around in her chair before texting Derek again. There was only a half hour until lunch and she decided to make the most of it.

--

Derek was in the middle of texting Meredith back as he walked down the hall holding some of his patients' charts. He had some free time before lunch, and decided that now would be a good time to go see the Chief about inviting Adele to the wedding.

Just as Derek knocked on the door and entered, Richard was on the other side about to exit. The two men bumped into each other, causing Derek's charts and phone to drop to the ground. Before Derek could grab it, Richard bent down and picked up Derek's Blackberry, noticing the message written across the screen from Meredith.

Derek cringed and squeezed his eyes shut, wishing the Chief of all people wouldn't have seen the porny thing Meredith had just written to him about Derek being inside of her while she screamed his name.

"Oh…uh…this is…here" Richard said awkwardly, mustering the best smile he could.

Derek dropped his head and accepted the phone before dropping it into his pocket.

"Did you want to see me about something, Derek?", Richard questioned, trying his best to sound professional.

"Yes, actually. I was wondering if Adele would like to come to the wedding", Derek replied as the two men walked into his office and sat down.

The Chief smiled. "I'm sure she would love to."

"Good", Derek said, returning the smile. "It's just—Meredith told me how you and Adele used to babysit her when she was little. When we were originally planning the wedding, you two weren't back together—but now you are and we just thought she might like to come", he explained.

"Thank you, Derek. That…it means a lot to me", Richard said genuinely.

Derek just nodded and smiled, still slightly embarrassed by what had happened.

"Actually, I had something to ask you", Richard began, shifting slightly in his desk chair.

"What's that?", Derek asked curiously.

"Tomorrow, Adele and I have tickets to the opera—my birthday gift to her", he stated proudly.

"Nice choice, sir", Derek laughed.

Richard smiled. "That's why I need you to represent the hospital at the annual fundraiser gala tomorrow night. I'm delegating."

Derek's smile faded slightly. "Hmm?"

"I need you to go there and charm the donors…help the hospital get funding", Richard said with a nod.

"Right…", Derek replied skeptically. "And this is tomorrow night?"

"I know, I'm sorry for the short notice. I would ask Sloan but I have a feeling the hospital would end up _losing_ funding if he were to attend", the Chief replied. Derek wasn't sure if he was joking or was being serious.

"Yeah", Derek agreed, laughing slightly. "Okay."

"Thank you, Derek. I really appreciate it", Richard grinned. "Obviously, Meredith is welcome to attend with you."

Derek couldn't help but smirk. Meredith rarely got dressed up for anything. He wasn't so sure how she'd take the new about having to attend a black tie and ball gown gala with him. "Yeah. I'm sure she'd love to", Derek lied.

"Good. I'm glad to hear it", Richard said with a smile. "Tomorrow, both of your shifts will end at five so you can go home and get ready. It starts at seven and shouldn't go on any later than ten."

"Okay", Derek said with a nod. "Do I have to make a speech or anything?"

Richard shook his head. "No, all I need you to do is talk to the donors. They're a bunch of arrogant asses, but if you make a good impression, they'll give us the funding we need to stay a top notch hospital."

"Alright then", Derek smiled.

"Always knew I could count on you, Shep", Richard replied, handing Derek both of the tickets for the event, almost as if he knew Derek would agree to it in the first place.

Derek just smiled and accepted them, placing them in the breast pocket of his white coat. "Not a problem, Richard. Glad I could help. And uh, have fun at the opera", he smirked.

"I plan on it", the Chief replied, a grin on his face.

As the two of them stood up, Derek sighed. "Sorry about the uh…text. I really don't think Meredith would have wanted you to see that."

Richard blushed slightly and looked away. "I changed her diapers. That's all…", he responded nostalgically, thinking back to Meredith's baby days.

"Yeah, I guess that would be…awkward", Derek said, managing to laugh in spite of himself. "Sorry."

"It's fine." Richard shrugged it off and smiled. "Your business."

"Right. Well then…I'll talk to you later", Derek said, wanting nothing more than to leave his boss's office.

"Okay. And thank you again, Derek."

Derek smiled. "Not a problem."

--

Derek met Meredith in the on-call room promptly at noon. Meredith wasn't on her hands and knees as promised, but she was naked, and waiting for him in bed. "What if it hadn't been me and you're just lying in here naked?", Derek asked with a chuckle as he locked the door.

"Just a risk I was willing to take", Meredith giggled. She sat up in bed, pulling the blanket over her chest.

"So…", Derek began.

Meredith eyed him curiously. "Why are you looking at me like that? And why aren't you naked with a condom on by now?"

"I'd feel bad having sex and then asking you this, so I'm just going to get it over with…", he sighed.

"What?", she asked confusedly.

"How would you like to go with me to the fundraiser gala for the hospital tomorrow night…", he asked, grinning slightly.

"Uh...wait, what?"

"Richard is taking Adele to the opera—by the way, Adele is coming to the wedding—and he needed me to take his place. I have to go work my charm in order to make money for Seattle Grace", he said cockily.

"And you want me to go with you?", she asked, smirking slightly.

Derek shrugged. "Might be nice…free dinner, free drinks. That, and I think I'd have a lot more fun if you came with me."

"Uh huh", she laughed. "And this is tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, sorry", he said with an apologetic smile.

Meredith sighed. "I suppose this means I'll have to wear a dress?"

"Personally, I'm looking forward that that the most. You know what happened the last time we got dressed up for a hospital function…", he said suggestively.

"How could I forget that?", she giggled. She pulled him close to her and kissed him. "You owe me for this, you know."

"Hmm…what do I owe you?", he murmured against her lips.

Meredith pulled his shirt over his head and smiled. "I haven't decided yet. Sex, for starters."

"I can do that", he grinned. "Those text messages you sent me were pretty dirty…"

"I was reading _Cosmo_ in the clinic…"

Derek laughed. "Why were you reading _Cosmo _in the clinic?"

"Slow day", she replied. "I read about all of these new things you could do to me", she whispered into his ear.

Derek pulled off his scrub pants and kissed her again. "What position haven't we tried yet?"

"Hmm…lots", she replied, running her fingers through his hair.

"We need to get a copy of this magazine", he said musingly.

Meredith grabbed a condom out of Derek's wallet while he pulled off his boxers. "It was making me all hot for you…"

"Well I'm here now", he hummed, watching as she expertly rolled the condom onto him.

"You are", she smiled before getting on her hands and knees as promised.

"What are you doing?", he asked with a chuckle.

Meredith looked over her shoulder and smiled coyly at him. "Remember what I sent you about being on my hands and knees? I'm fulfilling my promise."

"God, I love you", he groaned, positioning himself behind her while leaning over to kiss her neck.

"I love you too." Meredith's giggles soon turned into moans as Derek slowly moved into her. This was definitely a good way to unwind at work.

--

The next day, after arriving home from work, both Meredith and Derek had to get dressed and ready for the event. Today during lunch, Meredith's friends were kind enough to bring in some of their dresses for Meredith to borrow so she wouldn't have to go out and buy one. Izzie's were all too big in the boobs, and Cristina's were all too short. Thankfully, Meredith shared her figure with her half-sister. Lexie let her borrow a royal blue gown she wore to some event back in med school. It actually fit Meredith nicely, and the color went well with her eyes.

"Der, help me zip this", Meredith called out to him while he, too, got ready.

Derek finished buttoning up his shirt and walked over to her. "You look hot in this", he chuckled, easily zipping the back of the dress that molded to her body perfectly.

Meredith giggled. "Hmm…you like it?"

"I may have to take advantage of you in this dress", he said with a smirk.

"It's Lexie's so I have to make sure I return it in perfect condition. And if it smells like sex, I'll be mortified", Meredith laughed, spinning around in his arms.

"We'll have it dry-cleaned", Derek replied before kissing her.

Meredith fixed his collar and ran her hands down the front of his shirt. "Always thinking ahead…", she said teasingly. "Okay, I have to finish getting all dolled up, and you're distracting me."

Derek laughed. "What am I doing?"

"You. Are undressing me with your eyes. And before I know it, we'll be naked, and then we'll be late, so leave me alone so I can get ready", Meredith rambled. "My boobs look big in this. Do I look slutty?", she asked as she fixed her dress in the mirror.

"And you say _I'm _distracting _you_", he chuckled. "Your boobs look fine. And you look gorgeous."

"Thank you", Meredith smiled. "I just want to put a little make-up on, then I'll be ready."

"You don't need make-up", Derek said softly, kissing her cheek. "…but okay."

Meredith giggled. "You're laying it on thick, huh?"

"You know I always think you look beautiful", Derek grinned, sitting down on the bed and putting on his shoes.

"Yeah yeah…", Meredith sighed as she dabbed some cover-up on her cheeks. "So when is thing over?"

"Right after I woo the donators", Derek chuckled. "Although we may have to sit through some speeches and toast to boring old guys."

"Are they going to feed us?", she asked with a small smile.

"According to Richard, they feed us the whole time", Derek informed her.

Meredith rolled some chap stick onto her lips and smiled. "Well, I guess this won't be so bad."

"It's not going to be that bad. And if it is, we can just sneak off into the bathroom for a quickie", he shrugged. It seemed as though his main goal tonight was getting a little action while she was in the dress.

"There will be no sneaking into the bathroom until you woo", Meredith told him. She tossed her make-up back into the bag and began fixing her hair.

"Wooing is the easy part. I woo you all the time", he replied cockily.

Meredith giggled. "Oh, you do?"

"It's part of my charm", he sighed, smiling at her.

"You're so full of yourself", Meredith teased. "Do you think anyone would notice if I went in my work shoes? These heels are going to ruin my feet…", she pouted, using Derek's shoulder to balance herself while she maneuvered her foot into the heels borrowed she borrowed from Izzie.

"I'm sure you could if you really wanted to", he chuckled.

Meredith sighed. "I guess I can just tough it out for a few hours."

"All set?", he asked, glancing to his watch to make sure they weren't running late.

Meredith smoothed out the collar of his suit jacket and smiled at him. "All set."

--

The gala was being held at one of Seattle's most prestigious banquet halls, complete with valet parking and chandeliers. Meredith was a little intimidated about attending such an event, given the fact that she was most likely going to be the only resident there.

All of the people who gathered at these types of benefits were older, and more experienced in their careers. Upon entering the large hall, Meredith immediately noticed that she and Derek were the youngest of the attendees. But Derek, being a world class neurosurgeon, and a former New York inhabitant, didn't seem at all nervous.

"This is Dr. Hamill", Derek murmured as the two approached the man. "He's one of the biggest donators. An ass, but, still…he's a generous ass…"

"A generous ass…okay", she replied skeptically.

"Dr. Hamill", Derek greeted, putting on his best smile. "Nice to see you again."

"Aah, Dr. Shepherd. I remember you from the galas held back in New York", the older man said, shaking Derek's hand.

"Yeah, I uh, I live in Seattle now", Derek explained, putting his left hand on the small of Meredith's back.

"And who's this? Where's William's daughter?", Dr. Hamill questioned, obviously referring to Addison's whereabouts. Apparently, Derek hadn't seen these men since the divorce.

"Addison and I haven't been together for a while now", Derek replied curtly, obviously not wanting to divulge his personal life to the man. "This is Meredith, my fiancé."

Dr. Hamill looked at Meredith quizzically. "She's…young", he remarked, taking a sip of his drink.

Meredith bit her lip; silently pleading that Derek would get them away from this man. "She's also a beautiful, brilliant surgeon. And happens to be the love of my life", Derek responded, smiling at her apologetically. "Excuse us…"

"Jeez…", Meredith sighed. "He's…"

Derek ran his fingers through his hair. "An ass, yes. Sorry about that."

"It's not your fault", Meredith said with a shrug. "So is Addison's dad a surgeon?"

"Nope, just rich", Derek laughed. "He owns a law firm back in New York. All of New York's finest know him."

"So these are New York's finest?", Meredith asked sarcastically. Clearly, the first person they had been introduced to didn't fit that description.

"I'm only familiar with the ones from New York", Derek explained. "Some of them are nice, but for the most part…not so much."

"Well, where's our table? I want to scope out the enemies", Meredith smirked.

"There's no enemies", Derek said with a laugh. "I think Richard said we're at table five…"

The two of them walked over to the round table, adorned with fancily folded napkins, a flowery centerpiece, and a ridiculous number of forks per person. Several of their tablemates were already seated. Meredith looked to Derek and smirked. "They all probably think I'm your arm candy…or a hooker or something."

"They don't think that", Derek chuckled. "Come on, let's just sit down."

"Okay…", Meredith replied cautiously. She took her seat in one of the chairs, and bit her lip.

"Good evening. I'm Mr. Harlow and this is my wife, Cynthia", one of the men greeted. At first glance, the man seemed friendly enough, and Meredith was silently hoping that the night could go smoothly.

"Derek Shepherd", he said with a grin, shaking each of their hands.

Meredith smiled at the two of them. "Meredith Grey", she said politely, before she, too, shook their hands.

"Grey? As in _Grey_?", the man asked in shock.

"That's me", Meredith smiled cautiously. Of course someone would bring up Ellis Grey. It was bound to happen in a room filled with surgeons.

"I met your mother once before at a conference in Boston. She's brilliant", one of the other men at the table chimed in. "Following in her footsteps, I suppose?"

"Yes", Meredith said with a nod, unsure of what else to say.

Derek noticed her hesitation and stepped in. "Meredith is independently brilliant", he beamed.

"How do you two know each other?", Cynthia asked with a smile.

"We're engaged", Meredith explained. They'd been engaged for a while now, but every time, it still took her by surprise to say the words out loud.

"Congratulations", they all said in response. So far, the people at their table seemed friendly enough. Until Dr. Hamill and a woman, presumably his wife came and sat down at the two remaining seats.

"Great", Meredith murmured so that only Derek could hear her.

Derek rested his hand on her thigh and kissed her cheek. "It's fine."

"Jim, we have a Grey at our table tonight…", one of the men pointed out to Dr. Hamill.

"Grey? As in surgeon extraordinaire? Who?", he asked, taking his seat.

Meredith smiled. "That would be me", she told him, the confidence shining through in her voice as she spoke to the man who had previously insulted her.

"Oh…well…it's a pleasure to meet you. Meredith, right?", he asked politely.

"Yes", she said with a nod.

"So both of you work at Seattle Grace?", one of them began casually.

Now came the time for Derek to charm the donors. "Yes. Richard had a prior arrangement, so I told him I'd attend this year…"

Meredith listened attentively as Derek spoke about all of Seattle Grace's accomplishments, which ultimately led to why they needed the furthered monetary support. Derek had this way about him that made people listen to what he had to say. He could be babbling on about how the sky was blue, and people would still pay attention to him.

She knew by the time he was finished that he had successfully wooed, and the benefactors were more than willing to donate. Just when Meredith was about to take him up on his offer to sneak away to the bathroom for a quickie, the main courses were being brought to the table.

Meredith leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too", he smiled warmly.

One of the women at the table caught a glimpse of Meredith's ring and gasped. "Oh wow…your ring is gorgeous!", she exclaimed.

Meredith blushed slightly and unconsciously spun it on her finger. "Oh, thank you", she said softly.

"When are you two getting married?", one of them asked curiously.

"July twelfth", Derek grinned, taking his fiancé's hand and squeezing it gently.

"That's only a few weeks away. Getting excited?"

Meredith smiled and nodded. "Yeah. We're keeping it small, just close friends and family. We can't wait", she said happily, taking a sip of her drink. Meredith didn't know when or why she and Derek became the topic of the table, but she figured as long as the conversation remained positive, she could handle it.

"Oh, are you expecting?", the woman she assumed to be Mr. Hammill's wife chimed in questioningly. She eyed what little parts of Meredith's torso could be seen from the height of the table and peered at her for a moment.

Meredith swallowed a bite of her meal and glared at the woman. Up until now, she could deal with the comments. But that particular snide remark set her off. "Excuse me?"

"Well, it just seems a bit sudden, that's all", she pointed out, not the slightest bit of regret in her voice.

"Well, I'm not pregnant. And Derek and I have known each other for almost three years…not that it's any of your business", Meredith said defensively.

"I'm sorry if I offended you", she apologized half-heartedly, taking a sip of her wine.

"It's…fine", Meredith breathed, trying to keep her calm for the sake of the rest of the table. "I'm going to go use the ladies room. I'll be right back, okay?", she whispered to Derek once the others at the table began conversing again.

Meredith stood up from the table, grabbed her small clutch, and made her way to the small restroom in the lobby of the hall. Once inside, she stood for a moment and bit her lip, pondering on whether or not to go the bathroom and possibly peeing on the dress by accident in the process. Instead, she opted to touch up her make-up. While rummaging through her small purse, the door of the restroom opened only to reveal Derek standing there behind her.

"What are you doing in here?", she hissed. "This is the women's room. What if I had been peeing?"

"Well, if you were, I hope you'd be in a stall. Besides, I've seen you naked a thousand times", Derek said with a chuckle. "But that's not the point", he sighed. "I'm sorry about…what just happened."

Meredith shrugged. "It's okay."

"No, it's not", he argued. Derek rubbed his hands up and down her arms and kissed her forehead. "She had no right to say that. But I am glad you said something. Because if you didn't, I would have."

"I didn't want to start anything, but that just…it pissed me off", Meredith admitted.

Derek nodded. "It pissed me off too. I'm sorry I dragged you to this…"

"It was actually sort of nice to get dressed up. It's okay", she smiled.

"Come on…", he said softly, taking her hand.

"Where are we going?", she asked curiously.

"We're leaving", he said with a chuckle. "I came here, did what I had to do, and now, you and I are going out to dinner."

"We already ate", she giggled.

Derek took off his suit jacket and gently draped it over her shoulders. "We can eat again. Or we can get dessert somewhere."

The two walked into the parking lot and made their way to the car. Meredith kissed his cheek and smiled at him. "Are you sure we can just leave? Won't the Chief be mad?"

"As long as he gets the check in the mail, I don't think he cares", Derek pointed out as they got into the car.

"I don't know if I'll be joining you for this next year", Meredith teased.

"I'm not going back to one of those. Things like that make me glad I left New York. If Richard can't go next year, I'll tell him to send Mark", Derek laughed as they drove down the road.

"Maybe not the wisest choice, but okay", Meredith agreed with a giggle. "So where are we going?"

Derek looked over at her and smirked. "Anywhere where there's a bathroom…"

"Wait, why?", she asked confusedly.

"Because I still haven't gotten to take advantage of you in that dress", he grinned, quirking his eyebrows slightly.

"What makes you so sure I'll let you?", she challenged jokingly.

"I was a good wooer tonight, remember?"

Meredith laughed. "I suppose you were."

**I promise the wedding is coming. School is kicking my ass, and I'm really busy. But it is coming soon. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	39. A Lesson in Mothering

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, MerDer would get more screen time, and Sadie would go back to the morgue, along with Denny. ;)**

**Sorry for the wait. Thanks for all the kind reviews! I really appreciate them.**

As Meredith stood at the OR board, all she could think about was the fact that this time next week, she and Derek would be in Italy. The wedding was just five days away, and she was more than ready for it. All of the preparations were made. Cakes, dresses, seating, guests…everything was planned out.

This morning, she had scrubbed in on a tumor removal with Derek, and now she just found out that the liver transplant she was supposed to be assisting on this afternoon had been moved to tomorrow. After erasing the surgery from the board, she went down to the vending machine on the second floor where the good snacks were, hoping Derek would page her to let her in on something.

She saw Dr. Bailey heading her way holding Tuck in one arm, and the diaper bag in the other. "Daycare's closed," she informed her. "Of all days for the d-a-m-n daycare to be closed, it had to be today…"

Meredith stopped and gave her former resident a sympathetic smile. "What's today?"

"I'm scheduled to assist on a humpty dumpty this morning, but now, it looks like that's not gonna happen…," Bailey sighed, shifting her son slightly in her arms.

Meredith did what she knew she had to do. "I'll watch him."

"What?," Bailey asked.

"I'll watch him. My surgery just got pulled, so I'm free. I'll watch him for you if you want," Meredith offered kindly.

"You'd do that?," she questioned hopefully.

Meredith shrugged. "Yeah. It'll be fine…fun. I mean, you saved my life so…," she assured her, as if trying to convince herself.

"That is true. I did save your life," Bailey agreed, smiling slightly. "Are you sure though?"

"Just tell me what I need to do with him, and it'll be fine," Meredith nodded, tucking some hair behind her ears.

"He just ate, so he shouldn't be hungry for a while. But if he is, there's snacks in the bag. There's books, crayons, toys, stuff like that…if you have any questions, page me or ask O'Malley. He's good with him," Bailey chuckled.

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

"Oh, and whenever he says "potty", that means he either has to go, or he already went," Bailey explained. "Sorry in advance for that by the way…"

"Oh, it's…that's fine. Where do I…?," she asked nervously.

"There's a potty for him in the resident lounge," Bailey told her. "Look, are you sure? This is a lot."

"It's no problem. I'll be fine," Meredith said. "Here…" She reached for the diaper bag and draped it over her shoulder.

"Thank you, Grey. I owe you," Bailey sighed. "Okay Tuck, Mommy has to go help save a life, so you're going to spend a little time with Meredith today," she said excitedly.

"Mehdif?," he asked, pointing to Meredith.

Bailey smiled and kissed her son's cheek. "Yep, that's Meredith."

"Pay?," he asked, playing with the collar of his mom's coat.

"Yeah, you and Meredith can play," Bailey laughed. "I'll see you later, okay?" She handed the toddler off to Meredith, who accepted him into her arms.

"We'll be fine", Meredith said with a smile, bouncing the boy slightly on her hip. "Ready Tuck? I'm going to get something from the vending machine, then we can go play."

"Thank you, Meredith," Bailey said sincerely. "I appreciate it."

Meredith simply smiled. "It's no problem."

The two women walked in opposite directions down the hall. Meredith and Tuck walked to the vending machines and she peered into the glass. "What should I get, Tuck?"

The boy looked at her and smiled. "Foo?"

Meredith giggled. "You sound like my niece." She pushed the button for the barbecue chips, but realized that retrieving them would be a challenge with the two year old in her arms. "I uh…you can walk, right?," she asked before rolling her eyes at herself. "What am I saying?"

She gently set Tuck on his feet and made sure he was steady before getting the chips. "There we go. You want to walk?," she asked softly.

"I wak," he nodded, grabbing into Meredith's fingers.

Meredith giggled slightly and let the little boy lead her down the hall. After they got onto the elevator and back up to the fourth floor, Meredith decided to sit over in the small waiting area. "I guess we can…sit on the floor," Meredith shrugged, not wanting him to fall out of a chair.

Just as she plopped herself down, Cristina walked by her in the hall. "Oh you cannot be serious?," she asked sarcastically.

"What?," Meredith asked, raising her head to look up at her friend.

Cristina walked over to her and smirked. "You're not even a bride yet and they're already mommy tracking you?"

"No, they're not mommy tracking me. This was voluntary mommy tracking. Bailey needed someone to watch him, so I offered," Meredith shrugged, pulling out some puzzles and coloring books from the diaper bag.

"So, what, you're just going to sit on the floor all day eating animal crackers and singing the ABCs?," she asked amusedly.

"I um…hopefully not all day," Meredith replied.

"Mommy tracked. Sucks for you," Cristina grinned as she walked down the hall.

Meredith just laughed and rolled her eyes. "Okay, Tuck, what do you want to do?"

"Pay," the boy nodded, handing Meredith a little toy alligator.

"Okay then…," she giggled. This wasn't as thrilling as being in the OR wielding a scalpel, but she figured a few hours of entertaining a two year old might be fun.

--

Derek had just finished a minor nerve procedure when he spotted Meredith on the floor with what looked like Bailey's son. He deposited his chart at the nurses' station and walked over to her, unable to hide the amused grin on his face. "Hey."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "Hey."

"What are you doing?," he asked, taking a seat on the coffee table.

"Watching Tuck for Bailey," Meredith explained as she colored in a coloring book.

"Boo," Tuck said, pointing to the blue crayon in Meredith's hand.

Meredith looked at the boy and smiled. "You want the blue? Here you go," she smiled, handing it to him.

"Voluntarily?," he asked.

"My surgery got cancelled. And she needed my help," Meredith repeated for the second time.

"That's very nice of you," he grinned. "Did you have lunch yet?"

"Nope, I was waiting for you," she yawned, running her fingers through her hair.

"Potty," the little boy announced, tugging on Meredith's scrub top.

"Crap. Potty," she whispered. "You have to go potty, hon?"

Tuck nodded urgently and stood up from his place on the floor. "Potty," he repeated, dancing around a little bit.

"Want me to…," Derek offered.

"No, I got it. There's a potty for him in the lounge. I'll be back," she said as she scooped up the boy and sprinted down the hall.

Derek couldn't tear the smile off his face as he sat there watching over the coloring books and crayons waiting for them to return. Meredith never ceased to amaze him with her inherent mommy instincts. He picked up her coloring book and chuckled slightly at the teddy bear on the page she was in the middle of coloring, thinking about what a wonderful mother she'd make one day.

Meredith returned a few minutes later with a much calmer looking Tuck walking in front of her, holding onto both of her hands. "Crisis averted," she giggled as they slowly approached Derek.

"You didn't get peed on?," Derek asked with a chuckle.

Meredith shook her head. "Nope. I thought I might, but we made it."

"Good," Derek smiled. "You hungry?"

"Yeah, just let me pack up this stuff, and we can go," she replied, closing the coloring book and depositing it into the tote bag Bailey had given her.

"You're quite the artist. That teddy bear…great work," he smirked, helping her put the crayons back in the box while Tuck sat holding his toy watching the two of them.

"You're such an—shut up," she laughed, nudging him slightly with her shoulder.

Derek just looked at her and smiled. "I happen to be serious, but fine…," he replied as they packed up the rest of the various odds and ends Meredith and Tuck had been playing with. "How long are you watching him?"

"Bailey's in surgery now, so I'm not sure. Probably a few more hours at least," Meredith said. "Come on, Tuck. Want to go have lunch?"

The little boy grabbed onto Meredith's hand and smiled up at her. "Unch?"

Meredith laughed. "That's right. Lunch." She went to grab the bag when Derek stopped her.

"I got it," he said, slinging it over his shoulder and taking Tuck's other hand.

As the three of them walked down the hall, Cristina passed by and smirked. "You're both mommy tracked."

"We are not," Meredith argued, laughing at her friend. "Are you going to lunch?"

"I'll be there in a few minutes," she called out as they went in opposite directions down the hall.

The three of them reached the elevator and let Tuck press the call button so they could go downstairs to eat. Once it arrived, they stepped inside and went down to the second floor cafeteria for lunch.

Izzie spotted them as they walked into the cafeteria and called them over. "Mer!"

Meredith looked to Derek. "Do you mind if we eat with them?"

"No, I don't mind," he said, shaking his head. "I'll go get us something to eat, and I'll meet you over there."

"Okay," Meredith smiled, taking the bag from his shoulder. She and Tuck walked over to the table and George immediately picked the little boy up and put him on his lap.

"You're watching him?," Izzie guessed, popping a chip into her mouth.

Meredith nodded. "Yep."

"Mommy tracked," Alex smirked amusedly.

"That's what I said," Cristina said, dropping down in the seat next to him.

"Okay, it's not mommy tracking if you do it voluntarily. And I'm not even having a baby, so that doesn't make any sense," Meredith pointed out, pulling a sippy cup from the bag and handing it to the little boy.

"Soon enough," Alex said with a shrug as he took a bit of his sandwich.

"What?," Meredith asked confusedly.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "They're placing bets. Just to be clear,_ I_ have not. "

"Me either," George chimed in.

"Bets on what?," she asked.

"When McDreamy knocks you up," Cristina informed her. "I have fifty on a honeymoon baby."

"I—seriously?," Meredith asked in amused shock.

"Hey guys," Lexie greeted, taking a seat next to George at the increasingly crowding table.

"Hey," Meredith replied. "Who else is in on this?," she asked the rest of the table.

"In on what?," Derek asked, pulling a chair over and squeezing it between Meredith's and George's.

"So far, just me, Yang, and Sloan," Alex told her.

"They're betting on how long it takes for me to get pregnant," she informed him.

"I'll feed him," George offered, taking the macaroni and cheese of the tray.

"Thank you, George," Meredith said with a smile.

"You're taking bets?," Derek asked curiously, unable to hide the amusement in his voice.

"I gave you the benefit of the doubt and said by Christmas," Alex said as he took a sip of his drink.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Well, what did Sloan say?"

"Wedding night," Cristina said simply.

"Of course he would," Derek sighed.

"I'm sure that when they want to have a baby, they'll have a baby. And it's none of our business," Lexie said in defense of her sister.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you, Lexie."

"You know what? Raise my fifty to a hundred," Cristina said confidently.

Meredith looked to her friend and smirked. "Evil…"

"Hey, you're the one who got yourself mommy tracked." Cristina threw her hands up in defense.

"Oh and that means you can put money on my womb?," Meredith asked, thoroughly amused by the situation rather than annoyed or horrified.

Alex made a face. "Well, when you put it like that…"

Izzie smiled. "Okay, new topic. Everybody ready for the wedding this Saturday?"

Meredith looked to her friend and smiled. "Thank you, Iz. I was getting a little creeped out."

"Yeah," Derek agreed. "Me too."

--

After lunch, Meredith made her way back upstairs with Tuck. Derek had to head in to surgery, but he said he'd come find her later if he had some free time.

"Chief," Meredith called out when she saw him walking down the hall. He turned around and smiled at her. "Do you know if Bailey is still in surgery?"

Richard nodded. "The humpty dumpty got a little tricky. They had some trouble taking the patient off bypass, so it's going to take a little while longer," he explained.

"Okay," Meredith said with a nod. "Thanks."

"Are you watching Tuck?," he asked curiously.

Meredith shifted the little boy on her hip. "I um…she had a surgery, and mine got cancelled, so I volunteered to help. If it's a problem—"

"Oh. No, no, no. It's fine. It's nice of you to do that," Richard said with a sincere smile. "Keep up the good work, Grey."

"Thank you, sir," Meredith said softly. Richard smiled and nodded before turning the corner of the hall, leaving Meredith with Tuck. "I thought we were getting in trouble," she whispered to him, giggling slightly.

Tuck looked at her curiously. "Tubble?"

"Nope, we're not in trouble. No time outs for us," Meredith smiled as the two walked down the hall, heading back to the waiting room they were sitting in before lunch.

After they arrived, Meredith settled Tuck down on the floor with some puzzles and helped him put it together. "Do you know what animal this is?," she asked him with a smile.

"Duck," the little boy replied. Meredith giggled and handed him the puzzle piece, letting him maneuver it into the correct spot. "Good job!," she cheered enthusiastically when he fit it in the right place.

"Meredith?"

Meredith turned around and saw Adele standing behind her holding her purse with both hands. "Hi," Meredith smiled meekly, wondering to herself what to say.

Adele came closer and sat in a chair next to them. "I'm just waiting for Richard. He's taking me to a late lunch over at the small café across the street," the older woman explained, setting her purse in the empty chair.

Meredith stood up and sat in the chair next to her, figuring it was less awkward than talking to her from the floor. "Oh. That's nice."

"Is this Bailey's son?," she asked with a smile. "I haven't seen him for a while."

"Yeah. He's getting big now," Meredith said softly.

"I watched you a lot when you were his age,"she said, a small nostalgic smile coming over her face.

Meredith looked to her and cocked her head slightly, a habit she had picked up from spending so much time with Derek. She knew Adele had watched her for a few months after her father left, but Meredith had no idea she watched her at such a young age too. "You did?"

Adele nodded. "I remember the first time I watched you, you were his age, maybe a little older. You were always so tiny," she laughed softly. "I was supposed to meet Richard for a lunch date, but of course, he was busy…anyway, while I was waiting for him, I saw you wandering down the hall by yourself. There was no one with you, so I assumed you were lost. You were crying and looked scared, so I called you over. I knew who you were as soon as I saw you."

Meredith watched the woman as she spoke to her. It was times like these that made her wonder how her mother could just leave her roaming the halls while she was still in diapers. Meredith didn't even have children, but still, she couldn't imagine leaving them without knowing they were safe.

"I walked over and you held your arms up. Oh, you were so adorable," she sighed, smiling softly. "I picked you up and I remember you rested your head on my shoulder. I saw one of the nurses looking for you. This was before the hospital had day care. Apparently, she'd gotten sidetracked with other patients, and was having trouble keeping an eye on you. So I offered to watch you."

"You did?," Meredith asked quietly.

"There was no way I was leaving you…even if I wanted to, I couldn't. You didn't want me to put you down," she laughed sadly. "So I just spent the day with you. Richard cancelled lunch after getting paged to an emergency surgery, but even still, I didn't leave…later on that day, I found out that usually, one of the nurses would look after you if your father had to work, and your mother had to bring you to the hospital."

Meredith gave the older woman a small smile. "So, you watched me a lot?"

"I did. After a while, you even started coming to my house, and the two of us would spend the day together," Adele explained before frowning slightly. "I knew…what was going on between my husband and your mother. I didn't want to see that, and I certainly didn't want _you_ seeing it—such an innocent little thing. So I would pick you up, and we would go different places whenever we got the chance."

"You did all of that for me?," she asked, suddenly feeling a sense of gratefulness to the woman. The woman who saved her from the trouble at home, and offered her a sense of normalcy and happiness in the face of her less than pleasant childhood.

"I enjoyed it. You helped me get through some tough days," Adele pointed out with a sad smile.

"I um…I didn't know. I mean, I knew you watched me, but…I didn't know you did all of that for me. It's…thank you, Adele," Meredith said softly.

Adele placed her hand on top of Meredith's and patted it slightly. "You turned into a brilliant surgeon. And from the looks of it, you have quite the heart, giving up surgeries to watch this little one."

"Well, thank you," Meredith replied, looking to Tuck to make sure he was okay.

"And congratulations. I'm looking forward to Saturday," she smiled.

"Oh, good," Meredith said enthusiastically. "And I hope you don't mind me using your husband…"

"Oh, Richard is honored to walk with you down the aisle. I think he may be more excited than you and Derek," Adele joked.

Meredith giggled. "Well good, I'm glad."

"Okay, well, I better go find my husband," Adele said as the two stood up from their chairs. She squeezed Meredith's arm affectionately and smiled. "It was nice talking to you, sweetheart."

"Yeah, you too," Meredith replied sincerely, watching as the woman walked off down the hall.

Meredith rejoined the little boy on the floor and helped him with another puzzle. As she played with him, she wondered if perhaps some of her inherent need to nurture had been thanks to Adele's care and kindness to her at such a young age. If that were the case, she would be forever thankful to the woman, who in many ways had been more of a mother to her than her own.

--

After work, Meredith went home without Derek, whose surgery had run late. When he walked in the door, he found her on the couch, a laptop propped on her lap. He smiled slightly at the determined look on her face and walked over to sit down next to her. "Hey."

"Hey," she said softly, not even turning her head away from the screen.

"What are you doing?," he asked curiously.

"Googling stuff about bachelorette parties. Apparently, Izzie wants my input," Meredith sighed, leaning closer to him.

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. "Find anything good?"

"Nothing remotely appropriate, but I'm looking…," she replied. "Ooh look. Pin the penis on the man. We could play that," she said with a giggle.

"Wow, that's…they actually make stuff like that…," he said surprisingly as Meredith clicked on a picture of the game board.

"That's uh…graphic", she said with a nod.

Derek laughed. "A little, yeah."

"I'll add it to the list. Maybe with a few drinks, I'll actually enjoy it," Meredith pointed out, writing the idea down on a piece of paper.

"Who's coming to this?," he asked.

"I think it's just going to be me, Iz, Cristina, and Lexie, if she wants," she informed him as she clicked on another website. "Oh, a sex toy party."

"Seriously?," he asked amusedly.

Meredith giggled. "I'm kidding. You're way better than any dildo."

"Thanks…I think," he laughed. "So do you think Alex and George would want to come to the bachelor party? Otherwise, it's just going to be Mark and me. And a two person bachelor party consisting of me, Mark, and a bag of chips is kind of pathetic."

"And a bachelor party consisting of you, Mark, George, Alex, and a bag of chips is less pathetic how?," she teased.

"The four of us could go to Joe's…might be fun", he laughed.

Meredith smirked. "Yeah, they'd probably come along. But no strip club."

"I wouldn't do that. And besides, I'd rather have you give me a private show," he grinned, quirking his eyebrows.

Meredith shut the laptop and placed it on the side table. "I would give you a private showing tonight, but I'm too tired," she giggled, lying back on the couch with her legs propped over his lap.

"How was Tuck?," he asked, running his hands over her thighs.

"He was good. But entertaining a two year old for almost eight hours is harder than it looks," she yawned.

"I bet it is," he agreed with a smile. "It really was nice of you to do that, you know."

"It was no big deal," Meredith shrugged. "I had a pretty interesting conversation with Adele too…"

Derek looked to her curiously. "Yeah? About what?"

"She used to watch me when I was little," she informed him. "Apparently, my mother left me with nurses when she was forced to bring me to work. But they were busy, you know, doing their jobs, which meant I spent a lot of time wandering the halls…"

"How old were you?"

"Two-ish," she said simply.

Derek cocked his head. "Two?"

"Yeah. Anyway, I was wandering around one day and she found me. And she watched me…all day," Meredith said slowly. "She was the only one who cared enough to look after me. I even went to her house, or she would take me places. And I just…"

"Hmm?," Derek asked quietly, trying to hide the sadness in his voice. It hurt him to think that even at two years old, she was alone in so many ways.

"After we moved to Boston, I spent all that time hating Richard. I resented him…resented him for breaking up my family. But not once did I even think about Adele. We were the ones that had to live with their mistakes. After the affair, we were the ones that had to help pick up the pieces," she said softly.

Derek reached his hand out to her and she accepted it into her own. "Yeah. I guess you were."

"I don't understand how my mother thought it was okay to leave me with the nurses—not that they were bad or anything, just that…I don't know," she said with a sigh.

"You feel like you weren't cared about?," Derek guessed.

Meredith shrugged. "I know my mom cared about me in her own way. But not…not the way a mother typically cares. So I just, I'm glad Adele was there, you know?"

"Yeah", Derek nodded in understanding. "I'm glad she was there too…two years old", he sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair.

Meredith noticed the change in his demeanor and smiled. "Maybe that's why I know the hospital so well…I've been there since the womb," she giggled.

"Guess so," he said with a slight chuckle. "And you know, maybe in a way, it taught you something."

"Yeah? What?," she asked quietly, playing with his fingers in her hand.

"It made you want to be better. It helped you to figure out what to do differently. And I think that maybe Adele is part of the reason why you're you…why you care so much—about everybody. And would give up surgeries to watch a two year old little boy for your boss," he said with a soft assuredness, taking her hand and kissing it.

"Love you," Meredith whispered, pulling herself into a sitting position before depositing herself on his lap.

Derek smiled and rubbed her arms with his hands. "I love you too."

"I finished my vows," she said with a smile.

"I knew you would," he whispered, leaning in to kiss her cheek.

"So I was thinking...," Meredith began softly. She ran her fingers through his hair and played with the curls on the back of his neck. "Maybe we should save them for just the two of us."

Derek cocked his head slightly and gave her a confused look. "What do you mean?," he asked.

"The vows are kind of personal things. And I think it'd be kind of nice to say them to each other...without everybody there. I mean, we can say the traditional vows at the wedding, but..."

"Okay," Derek replied softly, effectively cutting off her ramblings.

Meredith smiled contentedly. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I think that's more...us."

"I think so too," she agreed. Derek peered into her eyes and smiled. She was just as beautiful as the day they met. That day seemed so long ago, and there were days when he wished he could go back. He would have done things so differently. But none of that mattered. Because here they were, five days away from their wedding, and couldn't be happier.

"Ready to get married?," he asked softly.

Meredith rested her forehead against his and smiled. "I can't wait."

**The next chapter is the wedding. Finally. :D**

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	40. Husband & Wife

**Disclaimer: I wish.**

**Suggested listening: 18th Floor Balcony by Blue October. That's the song I listened to the whole time as I wrote this. I think it sets the mood for the chapter. There's a link on my profile for your listening pleasure. Enjoy! ;)**

_The Wedding Day_

_9:00 AM_

When Meredith Grey was a child, her mother never read her fairy tales. She was taught that Cinderella and castles didn't exist. And that happily ever after was crap. But that didn't mean she ever stopped believing in it. There was always that tiny bit of hope that maybe, just maybe, it was possible for her.

As it turns out, it was. She had found her Prince Charming. Except he wasn't _always_ princely, and he had a tendency to be _overly_ charming, but he was her Derek. And today, they would become husband and wife.

These were the thoughts running through her head this morning when she woke up. Surprisingly, she had slept well the night before and upon waking up, she didn't feel nervous. She felt calm, happy. The only thing that would make it perfect was if Derek was next to her. All of her thoughts were interrupted when Izzie opened the bedroom door slightly. Meredith couldn't help but smile when she noticed her friend's hair already set in large curlers.

"Good morning, bride," Izzie smiled cheekily as she entered the room with a cup of coffee for her; Cristina trailing behind her with a donut in her mouth.

Meredith sat up in bed and giggled through her yawn. "Thanks, Iz."

Both of her friends came down on the bed. "Are you excited?" Izzie asked happily.

"Of course I am," Meredith said with a laugh, taking a sip of her coffee.

"When are we supposed to be there?" Cristina asked as she glanced over to the digital clock on the nightstand. "Oh, and uh, happy wedding day."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled. "It starts at three. It's only nine so we have some time."

Alex appeared in the doorway and walked in, still trying to wipe the sleep from his eyes. "Hey. Happy wedding day," he said with a tired smile, giving Meredith a friendly kiss on the cheek before kissing Izzie.

"Morning," he grinned.

"Where's my kiss, Karev?" Cristina smirked. She shoved the rest of her donut in her mouth and reached over for Meredith's coffee.

Alex laughed. "In your dreams, Yang."

Izzie just rolled her eyes and laughed. "I'm going to make breakfast. If you need help with anything, let us know."

After her friends left the room, Meredith smiled softly to herself. All of this was really happening. Today, she and Derek would officially become a family. Today, she would become a Shepherd.

--

_10:00 AM_

Derek had been up for hours now. He had gotten up around seven, and couldn't fall back to sleep due to the excitement he was feeling. Today, he would be marrying Meredith Grey, the love of his life. It was going to be the happiest day of his life thus far, and he knew those days were only going to get better in the future.

All he wanted to do right now was be with her. They had seen each other only a few hours ago at the rehearsal dinner held the night before, but already, Derek missed her. He had grown accustomed to waking up with her every morning, so on this day, waking up in bed alone was a little strange. The fact that the next time he saw her, she'd be walking down the aisle was shocking to him. And he couldn't wait.

After getting out of the shower and putting on some comfy clothes, he heard his cell phone ringing on the counter and smiled when he read the name on the LCD screen.

_Meredith_

"Hey," Derek said softly as he answered the phone.

Meredith smiled when she heard his voice. "Hi."

"Do your friends know you're calling?" he asked with a laugh.

"No. But as far as I know, it's only against the rules to _see_ each other before the wedding. No one ever said anything about calling," she giggled.

"Good. Because I was going to call you too", Derek confessed.

Meredith stood in her bedroom and peered out the window, smiling at the bright, sunny weather. "We got a nice day..."

Derek smiled and walked outside onto the small porch. "Yeah, we did. It's perfect."

"Is your mom there yet?" she asked softly as she stared at her wedding dress hanging on her armoire.

"Nope, not yet. I think Mark is picking her up at the airport now," Derek explained.

Meredith nodded. "When is Addison coming?"

"Uh, I think her plane gets in at one. So she'll be here," Derek said. "Did you talk to Lexie?"

"Yeah. Everybody is down in the kitchen eating now. Apparently, big occasions call for big breakfasts," she said with a giggle. "Lexie said Molly, Eric, and Laura will be here."

"Good," Derek smiled. "So how are you doing?"

"I'm excited. Lots to do though...," she said, letting out a deep breath.

"Don't worry about anything today. Today is our day," he said with a soft smile.

Meredith sat on her bed and picked up the picture she had of the two of them on her nightstand. "Our day," she whispered.

"I love you, Mer," Derek said softly.

Meredith smiled as she felt the tears come to her eyes. "I love you too."

--

_3:00 PM_

Everything and everyone was ready. All of the guests were seated, which consisted only of their closest family and friends. It was small and simple, and exactly what they wanted. Derek was already in place, and now they were just waiting for Meredith, Izzie, and Cristina, who were just finished up getting ready in Meredith and Derek's new home.

As Meredith looked herself over in the mirror, she smiled. Her wedding dress was simple and light, perfect for an outdoor summer wedding. Her hair sat in soft curls on her shoulders, and she was wearing very little makeup. Meredith wasn't the girl who liked the pomp and frills. That wasn't her. The only thing that mattered to her today was her life with Derek.

After making the final preparations, the three of them emerged from the front door and made their way to the place where the small ceremony was being held, only a few feet away.

Richard was waiting for them and smiled when he saw them approaching. "Your mother...she'd be proud of you," he said softly; a sincere smile on his face.

Meredith returned the smile and bit her lip. "Thank you."

When the single violinist they had hired began playing, both of her maids of honor took their places and made their way down the small aisle between their guests. All eyes were on Izzie and Cristina as they walked one after the other.

Everyone's eyes but Derek's, who couldn't tear his gaze away from the love of his life waiting patiently for her turn to walk down the aisle. He felt the tears well in his eyes as she gave him a small, assuring smile. She looked beautiful.

"I love you," she mouthed.

"I love you too," he responded silently.

After her best friends were in place in the front, the small group of guests stood up and waited for her to walk down the aisle. Meredith took a deep breath and laced her arm through Richard's. The music started again and together, the two of them began walking. Meredith knew that she'd never forget this moment. Nor would Derek. His future and happiness was walking toward him. Meredith wore a small smile. And she looked completely calm. There was no trace of doubt or nervousness on her face.

Derek's breath hitched in his throat when she came to stand face to face with him. The need to touch her became so great that he reached his hand out to her and squeezed it softly. Meredith squeezed his hand back; the look in her eyes telling him everything she was feeling without words.

As the justice of the peace began speaking, Meredith's mind couldn't focus on what he was saying. All she could think about was the man in front of her, and how much she loved him. She found the love of her life without ever trying. She had done the one thing her mother couldn't. The little thing called happily ever after. Realistically, it wasn't always going to be happy. But she knew that the ever after part was what mattered.

They'd be there for each other through everything. Today was just the beginning of the rest of their lives together.

"Do you, Derek Shepherd, take Meredith Grey to be you lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as you both shall live?"

Derek smiled, his eyes filling with tears. "I do."

"And do you, Meredith Grey, take Derek Shepherd to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Meredith whispered confidently as several tears escaped her eyes.

After the wedding bands had been placed on each of their fingers, the justice of the peace pronounced them husband and wife. And before Meredith even had the chance to savor the moment, Derek pulled her tightly against his body and kissed her, showing her exactly how he felt about her without saying anything. It didn't matter that they had an audience, no matter how small. It didn't stop them from kissing each other as they would if they were alone.

When their lips finally parted, Derek rested his forehead against hers and smiled. "I love you."

Meredith smiled peacefully and took his hands in her own. "I love you too," she said softly.

"We're married," he said in astonishment, chuckling slightly.

"Yeah," Meredith giggled as a fresh sheen of tears covered her expressive, green eyes. "We are."

--

The reception followed the small ceremony and the guests meandered on over to the adjoining area adorned with tables and chairs.

Meredith and Derek never left each other's sides as they greeted their guests. Linda Shepherd was the first one they approached, and she immediately took her son and new daughter-in-law into her arms.

"Congratulations," she said happily. "I love you both so much."

"Love you too, Mom", Derek smiled, kissing his mother's cheek.

"The ceremony was just beautiful. I think it was perfect for you two," she gushed. She fixed her son's tie and Meredith smiled slightly at the motherly gesture.

"So do we," Meredith said softly. "It's...we didn't want anything too big."

Linda beamed proudly at both of them. "It was just wonderful. And Meredith, you look beautiful as always."

Meredith blushed slightly and bit her lip. "Thank you."

"What about me?" Derek pouted.

Linda rolled her eyes and laughed. "You're my baby boy. You always look handsome."

"Thanks," he said with a laugh.

"Okay, I'll catch up with the two of you later. Go see the rest of your guests," Linda said, squeezing Meredith's hand softly before letting it go.

Derek and Meredith walked over to the group of their friends and were immediately greeted with claps and cheers. "Congratulations!" Izzie said excitedly as she hugged them both. The rest of their friends eventually gave their congratulatory hugs, including Cristina, which could only be explained by the glass of wine in hand.

The next cluster included Richard, Adele, and Addison. Meredith swallowed hard as they approached them. Addison looked as leggy and fabulous as ever, probably more so than the bride. Derek didn't seem at all phased by seeing her and they gave each other a friendly hug. "Congratulations", Addison said with a sincere smile as she pulled Meredith in for a hug.

Meredith smiled and hugged her back. "Thank you, Addison."

"You both look wonderful", she said softly. "And the ceremony was just beautiful."

"Thank you," Derek grinned.

"There she is...," Mark grinned, walking over to Addison; his suit jacket already draped over a chair.

Addison rolled her eyes and smirked. "He never stops. I'll catch up with you two in a bit."

"Okay," Meredith laughed. She and Derek directed their attention to Richard and Adele. "Thank you both. Not just for coming today, but for...you both really care about us, and I just...thank you."

"Congratulations," Adele said with a smile. Both she and her husband hugged the two of them. "We're so happy for you."

Derek smiled and squeezed Meredith's hand. "Thank you."

Bailey walked over to the newly married couple and smiled. "Congratulations."

"Hello, Dr. Bailey," Meredith smiled. "Thank you for coming."

"Thank you for having me," she said graciously. She took Meredith's left hand and admired the new wedding band on her finger. "You did good, Shepherd."

Derek laughed. "Thanks."

"Never thought I'd see the day when my intern married my boss...but you two have always been full of surprises," she laughed.

"Just admit that we're your favorite," Derek replied with a smirk.

"He's still cocky. Marriage hasn't changed a thing," Bailey said jokingly.

Meredith giggled. "I guess not."

"Mehdif!" a small voice called out amongst the crowd. Meredith and Derek turned around to see their little niece with outstretched arms.

"Hey there, Laura!" Derek said excitedly as Meredith's step-family walked over to them.

"Dek!" she squealed, clapping her hands together.

"Can I...?" Derek asked, looking to Lexie who was holding her.

Lexie nodded. "Sure." She handed the small girl over; Laura wore a yellow dress and little white sandals, and looked even more like Meredith than the last time they had seen her.

"Hey there, sweet pea. Remember us?" Meredith asked with a giggle. She tickled the little girl's belly and Laura laughed happily.

"Congratulations. It was a beautiful wedding. And that's...quite a house," Lexie said with a laugh.

"Thank you," Meredith said softly. "And thank you all for coming. It means a lot to us."

"Thanks for having us. Laura was really excited about this, "Molly remarked with a smile, watching as her daughter played with Derek's suit jacket.

"It's so nice to see you all again," Derek grinned.

After they had greeted everyone, he and Meredith managed to sneak off to the backyard of the house for a few minutes alone. They hadn't gotten the chance to really talk all day, and they both needed a few minutes with just the two of them.

"So...," Meredith whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him softly.

Derek smiled and pulled her close. "So..."

"You're my husband," she giggled slightly as the tears came to her eyes. "Never thought I'd have one of those."

"I always knew we'd make it," Derek replied. He wiped the tears from her face with the pad of his thumb and kissed her forehead.

Meredith met his eye line and smiled. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," he whispered.

"Do you feel different?" she wondered aloud, running her fingers through his hair.

"Not different. Just...more in love with you than I've ever been," he breathed.

Meredith hugged him tighter, never wanting to let him go. "I love you so much." There was a time when she never said those words, and now, they were the only words she could think to say at the moment.

"I love you too," he said softly. "And you look beautiful."

"You like the dress?" she asked with a smile.

"I love it. And I can't wait to take it off of you," Derek said with a smirk.

Meredith laughed. "We are not having sex against the house...we didn't even get pictures yet."

"I can wait. Tonight...we're not getting any sleep," he grinned as he leaned in to kiss her again.

"Looking forward to it", she said with a giggle. Meredith rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes, savoring the moment with her husband. "I'm a Shepherd."

"You're a Shepherd," he repeated.

"I'm glad I'm a Shepherd," she said quietly. The silence was soon replaced by the sound of the violinist playing in the front of the house.

Derek tilted up her chin with his finger and kissed her sweetly. "Dance with me."

"Right here?" she asked amusedly.

"I'd rather dance with you out here. Our first dance as husband and wife...may as well make it special," he grinned.

Meredith looked up at him and smiled. "Okay."

Together, the two of them danced on the patio of their backyard. Nothing could ruin the perfection of the day. Just the two of them, enjoying the first moments of being married, joining them together as a family forever.

The reception was just what they'd hoped it would be. They were surrounded by family and friends who genuinely cared about them. There was picture taking, dancing, toasting, eating, drinking and everyone had more fun than they had ever imagined. It was a day that neither of them would ever forget. The event lasted into the night, even though most of them were due back to work in only a few hours. However, it seemed as though Meredith and Derek's wedding day trumped any work obligations.

Around two o'clock AM, the final cluster of friends finally departed, leaving Meredith and Derek completely alone. It was late, but neither of them were tired. The adrenaline of the day coupled with what was to come once they officially consummated their marriage later on that night were enough to keep them awake for days.

Meredith's heels had been abandoned somewhere on the grass hours ago, along with Derek's suit jacket, which was draped over one of the chairs scattered about the lawn. Right now, the only thing on either of their minds was each other. The kisses were kept chaste throughout the evening, and now, there was nothing more either wanted to do than begin the love making right out in front of the house.

Surprisingly, they made it into their new home where they would be spending the night. Derek pressed his lips against hers and manuevered them through the house and up the stairs toward their bedroom, which was the only finished bedroom so far. They made love well into the night, only stopping when their bodies had exhausted all their energy. Meredith rested her head on Derek's chest and attempted to even out her breathing.

"Oh God," she panted, pressing soft kisses against his chest. "Married sex...pretty damn good."

Derek ran his fingers down her bare back and kissed the top of her head. "Another round?" he asked breathlessly.

"My legs are shaking," she giggled.

"I guess I'm doing my job right...," he chuckled. Derek put his hand against her chest and felt her heartbeat. "Your heart is beating a mile a minute."

"Are you trying to feel me up?" Meredith asked, raising her head to look at him.

"You're my wife. I'm allowed to feel you up," he retorted jokingly.

"Hmm...good," she breathed.

Derek looked out the window. "The sun is coming up," he commented, combing his fingers through her hair.

"That's because we've been having sex for almost four hours," she laughed.

"In our bedroom...," Derek added, pressing soft kisses on her shoulder.

"We lost our new bed virginity...," she said with a giggle.

"We definitely did," he agreed, smirking slightly. "And what a way to lose it..."

Meredith rolled onto her back and placed a hand over her bare stomach. "I love our bedroom."

"We're good decorators," Derek chuckled. He reached over and laced his fingers through hers.

"And good bed choosers. I'm glad it didn't collapse underneath of us," she said with a tired giggle, slowly succumbing to the sleepiness as it came over her body.

"We worked hard tonight," he grinned.

"I love you, Derek," Meredith whispered, rolling onto her side and wrapping her arm around his waist.

Derek pulled her up against his body. "I love you too, Meredith Shepherd."

Meredith smiled at the way the sound of her name rolled off his tongue, as though she was always meant to be Meredith Shepherd. As she drifted off to sleep, she realized that indeed, she was. And being a Shepherd was all she ever wanted to be.

--

It was nearly one in the afternoon before either of them woke up that day. Thankfully, they had saved up enough vacation days to be able to have a day's worth of resting before their trip to Italy for the honeymoon.

The newly married activities had only ceased hours before, and both were completely exhausted. Meredith's eyelids fluttered open when Derek pulled her naked body into his arms and buried his face in the crook of her neck.

"Hmm...," she sighed, running her hand along his thigh.

Derek kissed her collarbone and smiled. "Morning."

"Afternoon," she corrected sleepily.

"Love you," he whispered as she rolled over in his arms to face him.

Meredith sighed contentedly and looked at him with tired eyes. "I love you too."

A few moments of comfortable silence passed before Meredith spoke. "You know what I just remembered?"

"Hmm...?" Derek asked, kissing her forehead.

"We didn't read each other our vows yet," she reminded him.

Derek smiled. "Do you want to?" he asked. They decided to save their personal vows for each other's ears only. The vows were something important to both of them, and they didn't feel as though reciting them in front of a group of people was necessary. They knew how they felt about each other, and that was all that mattered.

She put her hand on his cheek and smiled. "Okay."

Meredith reached into the nightstand and pulled out a folded sheet of paper. Derek looked at her curiously and smiled. "How long have they been in there?"

"Yesterday when I was getting ready in here, I put them in there," she confessed, giggling slightly. "I already lost my shoes somewhere on the grass. I didn't want these getting lost too."

Derek laughed as he sat up in bed. "Good thinking."

"Where are yours?" she asked as she, too, sat up in the bed and pulled the covers over her upper half.

"In the pocket of my pants," he replied. He leaned over the side of the bed to pick up his discarded pants and Meredith giggled at his exposed ass. Derek sat upright again and looked to her. "What?"

"Nothing. I was just checking out your butt," she explained, smiling coyly. "It's what I woke up to the day after we met."

"Hmm...the night you took advantage of me?" he asked amusedly. "Trying to take advantage again?"

Meredith laughed and leaned in to kiss him. Cristina would probably mock her endlessly if she listened to their banter, but she didn't care. This was all she ever wanted with him. "There's going to be a lot of nakedness for the next two weeks on the honeymoon. So...vows now. Naked later."

"Okay", Derek said softly, kissing her again before smiling. "You first."

"Okay", she whispered. Meredith unfolded the piece of paper and cleared her throat before beginning. "Derek, on this day, the day of our wedding," she began before interrupting herself. "Well, day after our wedding...I want to say how blessed I feel to have you in my life. And how grateful I am to have made it to this day. Before I met you, I didn't believe that love like this existed. But you proved me wrong. We've had our share of heartache, but through it all, you never gave up on me. For the first time in my life, I understood what is was to love and be loved unconditionally. And as we build our life together, I just want you to know that I will always love you, support you, and believe in you in the same way you do for me. A while ago, you told me to take what we had on faith and I did...and I'm so glad I did. You, Derek Shepherd, the love of my life, gave me a reason to believe. And I know that in the future, those reasons will only grow stronger, just as my love for you grows every day of our lives. I love you," she ended softly as tears escaped her eyes.

Derek took her hand in his own and smiled at her. He wiped away his own tears before brushing hers away as well. "Meredith," he whispered. "That was..." He couldn't think of the right words to use, so he simply cupped her cheeks in his hands and kissed her tenderly, unable to fathom how much he loved the woman next to him. His wife.

Meredith smiled and rested her forehead against her husband's. "I really do mean every word of it," she said quietly.

"I know," he replied, brushing some soft curls off her face.

"Read yours," she urged.

"Okay," Derek smiled. "Meredith, I know that anything I say will be inadequate in describing how much I love you. You saved me. That sounds corny and you'll probably make fun of me for it, but it's the truth. And you did it without trying. The day I met you was the day I started to feel alive again. I fell in love with you fast and hard, and that love has never faltered, and never will. Waking up next to you every morning, sometimes I still wonder how I got so lucky. The love and joy you bring to my life is indescribable. And as your husband, I promise to always give you the same love and joy you have given me. You, Meredith, my wife, my partner, and one day, mother of our children, are the love of my life, and my very best friend. And I vow to stand by your side and love you with all of my heart for the rest of our lives."

Meredith squeezed his hand and wiped a few more tears off her face. "Der," she said almost inaudibly. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love _you,_" he whispered, pulling her into his lap and hugging her tightly.

"Yours were better," she murmured as she kissed his jaw line.

Derek smiled at her. "I liked yours more."

"Thank you, Derek," she said softly.

"For what?" he asked, cocking his head curiously.

She shrugged. "Being you."

"Thank you for being you," he whispered in response, rolling them over and pressing her into the mattress.

"What are you doing?" Meredith asked half-heartedly. She ran her fingers through his hair and played with the curls on the back of his neck.

"I...am going to make love to my wife," he whispered, kissing her neck.

"I think I like this married thing," she giggled; her body erupting into goose bumps from the attention Derek was giving her.

He smiled, looking at his wife with the love and adoration reserved just for her. "And this is just the beginning..."

**They're finally husband and wife! Hope you liked it. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	41. Honeymoon

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! I really appreciate them.**

**And by the way, the hotel they're staying at really exists. And now I want to go to Venice just to stay there. Seriously, Google it. It's amazing. :P**

If there was one thing Meredith and Derek were good at, besides sex and surgery, it was picking out hotels. The Hotel Concordia was just beautiful. It was situated in the heart of Venice overlooking Saint Mark's Basilica. Everything about it was gorgeous, from the silk sheets and marble bath to their very own balcony overlooking the square. Thankfully, they still had almost two weeks to spend there. And so far, they had enjoyed every minute of it.

Meredith rolled on top of her husband and ran her fingers through his hair. "Are we ever going to leave this hotel room?" she asked with a giggle.

"It's a nice room," Derek grinned. "And a nice bed."

"Which we've been naked in for three days straight," she added, pressing her lips to his. "Not that I mind the nakedness, But seriously, we're in Italy. We have to go do Italy things."

Derek trailed his fingers down the length of her spine and smiled up at her. "Okay."

"Hmm...yeah?" she asked softly, unable to resist the urge to kiss her husband again.

"We still have to go on the gondola ride," he murmured against her lips.

"Yes we do," she agreed, smiling slightly. "And then we could go to dinner somewhere romantic..."

"We could," Derek grinned. He hugged her tightly and rolled them to their sides. "Want to take a shower? Then we can go."

Meredith smirked. "Is this your way to sex me up again?"

"Is it that obvious?" he asked mischievously, brushing some hair off her face.

"We're on our honeymoon. I guess you can get away with your cheesiness here," she replied teasingly.

"Good to know," he said with a smile. "Maybe we should come here more often..."

She rolled her eyes. "Sure. We can come during our one day off every week."

"Sounds like a plan to me," Derek joked. He easily scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the bathroom of their Italian honeymoon suite for some more quality time together as man and wife.

--

As they sat in the gondola in Venice, Derek couldn't help but fall even more in love with his wife. She was wrapped in his arms, completely happy. Nothing could make life more perfect than it was right now. He kissed the top of her head, and she looked back at him and smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said softly.

"I'm glad I'm in Italy with you," she whispered as she leaned in to kiss him.

Derek smiled against her lips and pulled her closer into his arms. "Hmm...me too."

"This is just so...I never thought I'd...I just really love you", she concluded with a simple shrug.

"I really love you", he grinned, kissing her again.

"I think Italy has turned us into saps,", she said with a giggle, rolling her eyes.

Derek smirked at her. "That may be true, but I think it's turned you even hornier than usual."

"What?" she asked, feigning shock and crossing her arms over her chest.

"I was brushing my teeth this morning, and you pretty much jumped me in the bathroom", he laughed. He poured some more wine into their small wine glasses and handed it back to her.

Meredith glared at him and accepted it into her hands. "Fine. I guess I won't jump you anymore," she said teasingly.

"I love it when you jump me," he grinned, kissing her again.

"Hmm...yeah?" she asked seductively as she rubbed her hand along his thigh.

Derek's breath caught in his throat at her touch, and he quickly took her hand into his own. "Mer...," he groaned. "Later."

Meredith bit her lip and smiled at him. "You mean you don't want to have sex with me in a gondola?"

"If there wasn't a guy standing on the back of it and rowing, we would have already had sex...multiple times," Derek said with a confident nod, combing his fingers through her hair.

"Good to know," she sighed contentedly, resting her head on his shoulder.

"So, what's the story with the Bridge of Sighs?" he asked her as he gently stroked her arm with his hand.

Meredith smiled slightly. "I had this patient a while ago. She was talking about how she and her husband planned this vacation to Italy. And she told me that if you went under the Bridge of Sighs with the love of your life, you'd be together for all eternity," she explained, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"We will be," Derek replied assuredly, all the confidence in the world evident in his voice.

Meredith looked to her husband and smiled softly. "I know."

--

"I thought places like these only existed in movies...," Meredith giggled. After the gondola ride, they took a short walk to the Café Florian nearby. They were seated at an outdoor table, surrounded by grapevines and fountains; a small string of lights hung above their table, casting a warm glow over the two of them.

Derek smiled at her. "Nice, isn't it?"

"It's beautiful," Meredith whispered, looking around and taking in her surroundings. "Everything about this place is beautiful."

"You match the décor," he grinned amusedly, waiting for her reaction.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "You're already getting sex tonight. There's no need to try to win extra points."

"I already expected sex. I was just stating a fact," he pointed out, taking a sip of his wine.

"Uh huh," she giggled. "Okay."

Derek reached across the table and squeezed her hand. "I love you, Mer."

Meredith smiled at her husband and reciprocated the gesture. "I love you too."

The waiter walked over to them and told them of the dinner and wine specials for the evening. They decided to order different meals so they could share each others.

"I'll have the spaghetti and meatballs," Meredith told the waiter with a smile, closing her menu and handing it to him.

Derek cleared his throat and looked up at the man. "I'll have the salmon scampi. Thank you," he nodded.

"You know I'll be sharing that with you, right?" Meredith asked with a giggle.

"One of the reasons why I ordered it," he grinned.

Meredith smiled at how well he knew her. "Aw, thank you."

"Spaghetti and meatballs...we should do that thing from the Disney movie about the dogs," he said teasingly.

"Where we share the same piece of spaghetti and end up lip-locked? I don't think so," she laughed, brushing some hair off her face.

"That's one of my favorite movies, you know," he informed her as he took a sip of his wine.

"I've never seen it; just that one scene that they always show from it," she explained, buttering a roll and taking a bite.

Derek cocked his head and smiled at her. "You've never seen _Lady and the Tramp_?"

"I wasn't exactly raised on Disney movies. I was the girl who popped in the surgery tapes when I was bored," she shrugged, laughing slightly.

"Four sisters. I was always outnumbered when it came to picking movies," he chuckled, thinking back to the memories of his childhood. "And then when I became Uncle Derek to a bunch of little girls, I watched Cinderella every weekend."

"That's because you're a good uncle," she smiled sincerely, leaning across the table to kiss him.

"I'd say you're a pretty good aunt too. Laura was so excited to see you at the wedding," he replied amusedly. "You were holding her for close to an hour."

Meredith smiled. "I'm glad we got some pictures with her."

"I think we got some good pictures," Derek said with a grin.

"Mark did put his suit jacket back on, right?" she asked.

Derek laughed before nodding. "In most of them, I think. There may be one or two where he's holding a glass of champagne though."

"Well, they'll be unique wedding photos," Meredith shrugged jokingly. "As long as we got some good ones and obviously some good ones of us two..."

"I'm glad we got a lot of them on the land and in front of the house," Derek smiled, gently grazing her hand with his thumb.

"We haven't gotten many honeymoon pictures yet," she pointed out playfully.

Derek gave her a coy smile and smirked. "Nothing we've been doing for the past three days belongs in the family photo album..."

Meredith giggled and Derek noticed her blush slightly, even in the soft moonlight. "Guess not..."

"We can do some sightseeing tomorrow....maybe do some shopping," he suggested.

"We still have another week and a half. So I suppose we could squeeze some sex in tomorrow too," she reasoned.

The waiter brought out their food and set the dishes in front of them. Meredith immediately took a bite of his salmon scampi and he smiled at her. "You're adorable," he laughed.

"Because I steal food off your plate?" she asked with a giggle.

"We're married now. You don't have to ask--not that you ever did," he said with a chuckle.

Meredith sighed and smiled sweetly. "You love me..."

Derek looked at her and grinned. "I do."

--

When they arrived back at the hotel suite after dinner, Meredith collapsed onto the bed and let out a breath. "I don't think I'm going to eat again for days..."

Derek dropped down next to her and wrapped his arm around her torso. "Me either."

"Italy has the best food ever," she giggled, pressing her forehead against his and kissing him lightly.

"If we moved here, we'd both gain five hundred pounds in a month," Derek said jokingly. "We'd just...eat."

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair and smiled. "Nothing wrong with that..."

"We could eat...," he said before kissing her. "...and have sex."

"Is that all we'd do?" she murmured against his lips.

Derek rolled her on top of him. "Yep."

"Fun," Meredith breathed; her body erupting into chills as he kissed her neck. Just as she went to straddle his legs, her cell phone rang in the side table drawer. "Who the hell...?" she groaned, rolling over to retrieve it.

Though she was annoyed that potential sex had been interrupted, she couldn't help but smile a little as she saw the name on the screen. "It's Cristina," she told Derek before answering.

Derek simply nodded and dropped his head against the pillows. Meredith's friends really did have bad timing...Alex and Izzie walking in on their kitchen counter sex, now Cristina putting a temporary hold on their honeymoon recreation.

"Hello?"

"Hey. It's me. Well, actually, it's all of us," Cristina responded; the sound of her friends present in the background.

Meredith smiled. "Am I on speakerphone?"

"Yes you are! Hey Mer!" Izzie called. "Having fun?"

"Yeah. We just got back from dinner. Where are you guys?", she asked curiously, kicking her heels off and lying down next to Derek on the bed.

"At work. Bailey said we could call you," George said.

"Well, I'm glad you got permission," Meredith giggled.

"We only have a few minutes, but we just wanted to see how you two were doing. How's all the honeymoon sex? " Izzie asked with a grin.

Derek looked over and Meredith and rolled his eyes. "I'm right here, Stevens."

"Oops. Sorry," Izzie laughed. "I should have figured..."

"We probably interrupted sex," Alex pointed out. "Leave them alone."

"Did we interrupt sex?" Izzie asked curiously.

"Almost," Meredith admitted, much to Derek's embarrassment. He rolled on top of her and began kissing her neck to distract her. She tilted her head to the side and nearly dropped her phone on the floor.

Meredith moaned involuntarily at Derek's caresses and Cristina groaned. "He's on top of you, isn't he?"

Derek smiled against her skin and laughed. "Yes I am, Yang."

"Dude, hang up the phone. They want to do each other," Alex said knowingly.

"You always we're my favorite, Karev," Derek laughed.

"I'll call you guys in a few days, okay?" Meredith asked, giggling as Derek began tickling her sides.

"Have...fun," Cristina said, unable to think of a better word.

"Okay," Meredith laughed. "Bye."

"Your friends...worst timing ever," Derek sighed, leaving a trail of kisses down her collarbone.

Meredith's fingers found the button of his pants and she quickly undid it. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him closer. "Now it's just us..."

"Hmm...good," Derek breathed, lifting her up slightly to untie the back of her dress. He pushed it off her shoulders and kissed the newly exposed skin.

When she finally succeeded in undoing his pants, she used her feet to help kick them off his legs. Derek quickly rid himself of his shirt before trailing his hand up her thighs. "You wore panties," he pointed out, hooking his fingers in the waistband.

"I couldn't go pantyless on a gondola, Derek," she sighed, arching her body as he pulled them off her legs. "Too dangerous."

"Dangerous?" he asked curiously, moving back up her body to kiss her.

"Mmhmm....," she murmured against his lips.

Derek pulled her dress off the rest of the way. "Not dangerous enough for a bra," he groaned in appreciation, cupping her breasts in his hands and kissing each one gently.

"I didn't need one with this dress," she explained with a shiver; her body reacting to the attention her husband was giving her.

"No you didn't," he agreed, hastily removing his boxers and tossing them off the side of the king sized bed.

Meredith felt her heart beat quicken as she looked at him in all of his naked glory. She pulled him into her arms and kissed him. "Love you," she whispered, running her fingers through his hair.

"Love you...," he moaned as he slipped into her, groaning as she tightened herself around him.

Meredith's eyes flashed open and she pulled back slightly. "Der. Stop," she panted.

"Hmm?," he sighed, resting his forehead against hers.

"We--cond--you need to...," she stammered, pushing him off of her.

"Crap," he spat, quickly removing himself from her. "I um..."

"In the bag," she sighed, dropping her head into the pillows as she waited for him to come back.

Once Derek rejoined her on the bed, Meredith took the condom from his hands and gently rolled it onto him. "Okay," she said breathily, needing to have him inside of her once again.

Derek nodded and eased back into her, pressing soft kisses to her face as she tangled her fingers through his hair and moaned softly.

He braced his arms under her shoulders and looked into her darkened eyes. He tried to keep himself from moving while she adjusted herself beneath him.

When he knew she was ready, he began making love to her at a slow, torturous pace, wanting to draw out her pleasure as long as possible. Her pupils locked on his and her breathing became more erratic, so he reached between them and applied gentle pressure to the bundle of nerves between her legs. Meredith held him tightly and screamed her release, bucking her hips frantically.

Derek couldn't help but let himself go. He groaned deep in his throat and felt himself release. Afterward, he laid his head down on Meredith's chest and listened to her heartbeat as they both came down from their highs. "This whole...married, honeymoon sex thing...pretty good," he panted.

Meredith closed her eyes and smiled. "Hmm...," she murmured in agreement, running her fingers down his back. "We should have done this a long time ago."

He eased himself from her, tossed the condom into the waste basket and pulled her into his arms. "Probably," he chuckled.

"We've got a little ahead of ourselves," she stated almost nervously. Derek tickled her arm with his fingertips and nodded slightly.

"I just--no babies yet," she sighed, moving closer to him.

"Not yet," he agreed, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "Next year at this time, but not yet..."

Meredith nodded into his chest. "Mmhmm", she murmured.

"Can't wait--well, I can...you know what I mean," he laughed.

"I think you've picked up on my rambling, Der," she pointed out.

"It's cuter when you do it," he yawned.

"No one ever found my rambling cute before you came along," she admitted.

Derek simply smiled at her. "I'll always love the rambling."

"Hmm...I think we're both a little drunk on all the wine tonight," she giggled tiredly.

"Maybe a little," he agreed, pulling the silken sheets over their naked bodies. He noticed how her eyelids were fluttering to stay open and he kissed her gently. They were both completely exhausted from the day's activity. "Sleep," he whispered.

"Okay," she replied softly. "Love you."

"I love you too, Meredith," he said with a small smile, kissing his wife one last time before he, too, drifted off to sleep.

**Sorry it's kind of short. I just wanted to have an update ready. There's more honeymooning to come in the next chapter.**

**Reviews make my day!**

**Also, for anyone interested, I wrote a MerDer Christmas one-shot based after 5.10. Hope you like it if you decide to read. And happy holidays! :)**


	42. Time Spent Together

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy.**

**Thanks for the reviews!**

The next morning, Meredith rolled over in bed, expecting her husband to pull her into his arms. When she was met with the cool sheets covering the mattress instead of his warm body, she opened her eyes and looked around; her mind still foggy with sleep. Meredith noticed the door to the balcony was slightly ajar, and she smiled to herself, knowing exactly where he was. She stood up from the bed, and was quickly reminded of her nakedness, so she pulled on a camisole top and a pair of Derek's boxers before joining him outside.

Derek looked over to her and smiled widely. "Morning."

"Morning," she replied, leaning over the back of his chair to kiss his cheek. Meredith took a seat next to him and rested her legs over his lap.

He handed her a cup of coffee and smirked slightly. "You got dressed..."

"You're dressed too," she pointed out, gesturing to his boxers and Bowdoin tee shirt. "Which is a good thing. I don't think people would appreciate if we just wandered around naked."

"I'd appreciate it," he replied teasingly, running his fingers over the bottoms of her bare feet.

Meredith quickly snatched them away. "You know I'm ticklish, you ass," she giggled.

"Still calling me _ass_?," he asked amusedly. "That hurts."

"Ass is my term of endearment for you. We don't do the whole "I call you honey, you call me babe" crap. So you're gonna have to learn to live with it," she explained, unable to hide her smile.

Derek leaned over and kissed her softly. "Still ballsy as ever."

"Someone needs to keep you in line," she giggled. "And who better than your wife?"

"Good point," he said with a laugh.

"So I was thinking...," she began, holding her coffee mug between her hands and taking a sip.

Derek looked at her curiously. "About?"

"Maybe I should just go by Dr. Shepherd at work. Dr. Grey Shepherd is just...it's a lot. And I like being a Shepherd," she said with a small shrug.

"I like you being a Shepherd too. But don't do it just for me. If you want to have both, that's fine. Or if you just want one, that's okay too," he said honestly.

"I think I'm going to go with Shepherd. I want all of us to be Shepherds," she smiled softly.

"One big Shepherd family...," he grinned; the happiness in his eyes greater than she had ever seen before.

Meredith laughed. "I don't know about big..."

"I think we could handle five," he said jokingly, waiting for her reaction.

"Oh really?" she asked with a giggle. "I don't think I could handle five more of you...with your chattiness and perfect hair."

"So mean...," he mused, pulling her onto his lap.

Meredith smiled before pressing her lips to his. "I'm horny too."

"Yeah?" he whispered.

Meredith put a leg on either side of him and smiled. "Mmhmm," she breathed, resting her forehead against his. "Right here."

"Outside...again?" he asked, running his hands up and down her thighs.

"The railing is covered with vines and flowers. No one will see," she whispered as she kissed his jaw line.

"Okay, but, condom first," he reminded her, raising her up off his lap. "We almost forgot last night."

"That would have been bad--I mean, not that I don't--it's just that we're not--," she stammered.

Derek cut her off with a kiss. "I know," he whispered.

"Go. Condom," she ordered, kissing him again. She was ballsy, and he wouldn't change it for the world.

--

After their morning round of sex, Meredith pressed soft kisses to his neck, just enjoying the time spent with her husband. She broke out into a fit of uncontrollable giggles and Derek looked her curiously. "Why...are you laughing?" he panted, steadying her on his lap. Meredith was a tad klutzy after sex; her mind enveloped in a heavy post-coital fog that made it difficult to focus on anything, much less keeping herself balanced on his lap without falling off.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. "I don't know. We just--outside again. And it was...damn," she giggled through her own panting. "You're good."

"Thanks, you too," he teased, pulling her up against his body. Derek cupped her face gently in his hands and kissed her sweetly. "I love you."

"I love you too," she breathed. "I think I'm ready for a nap..."

"We can take a nap," he grinned.

Meredith smiled softly and nodded. Once she dismounted, the two of them grabbed their clothes and hurried back into their suite.

"Now I can take my shirt off," she laughed. Meredith pulled the camisole over her head and quickly found her way back under the silken sheets.

Derek slid next to his wife and pulled her close to him. "I like you shirtless," he chuckled, running his fingers up and down her spine.

"Hmm...I know," she giggled tiredly. "That's why I took it off."

"Thanks," he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "Nap."

Meredith wrapped her arm around his naked torso and let out a contented sigh. "Nap."

--

Derek woke up a little over an hour later to the sound of the water in the shower hitting the marble floor. When he noticed the other side of the bed was unoccupied, he smiled slightly and sat up. Rather than wait to take a shower after her, he decided to join her. Derek swung his legs over the side of the bed and made his way to the bathroom door. He knew Meredith well enough to know that she never locked the door when it was just the two of them--just one of her quirks he'd picked up on after living with her for a few months.

He opened the door and walked over to the large shower. Luckily, he was already naked, saving him the time of having to peel off any clothes. Derek opened the shower door and couldn't help but smile at his wife as she wet her hair under the stream of water. "Hey," he said softly.

Meredith looked over at him and smiled slightly. "What are you...?"

Before she could finish her sentence, Derek leaned in and kissed her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "I wanted to take a shower with you."

"I figured, or else you wouldn't be in here," she pointed out with a giggle, running her fingers through his head of now dark, wet curls.

"Why didn't you wake me?" he asked with a small smirk.

"You were sleeping. It was cute, and I didn't want to disrupt you," she explained softly as he kissed her forehead.

"Taking a shower with you always trumps sleeping," he chuckled.

Meredith giggled as she grabbed her shampoo off the rack. "Hmm...I'll remember that."

"Okay then," Derek said with a grin. He took the bottle from her and squeezed some of the lavender scented shampoo into his hands. He rubbed it between his palms before lathering it into her hair.

Meredith let out a small sigh and closed her eyes as she faced away from him. "You're good at that."

"Thank you," he laughed, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.

"Did you come in here so we could have sex?" she asked playfully.

Derek smiled against her skin. "No. I just want to take a shower...what better way to save water than by showering with you."

"Good point," she giggled, spinning around in his arms and meeting his eyes. Derek breathed in the soft scent of her shampoo as he rinsed it from her hair.

When he finished, Meredith grabbed his shampoo and repeated the process, running her fingers through his wet head of tangled curls. She stood on her tiptoes as she massaged it into his scalp. Derek chuckled slightly at the way she bit her lip in determination. "Don't fall..."

"You wouldn't let me fall," she replied with a knowing smile.

He gently wrapped his arms around her waist, keeping his hands on the small of her back. "I wouldn't," he whispered.

Meredith washed the suds from his hair and smoothed it away from his eyes. "I like taking showers with you," she said softly, leaning in and kissing him.

"Hmm...me too," he agreed.

They finished washing each others bodies and eventually made their way out of the shower. As they dried off, Meredith looked to him and smirked. "I don't think we saved much water..."

"Well, it was fun," Derek justified, wrapping the towel around his waist as he rummaged through the drawer for clothes.

"It was," she said with a giggle. "So what are we doing this afternoon, so I know what to wear?"

Derek shrugged. "Doesn't matter to me."

Meredith thought for a moment, running her fingers through the ends of her hair. "How about a picnic?"

"You want to go on a picnic?" he asked with a grin.

"It's hard to go on picnics back home. We're always at work, and it's always raining, so yeah...picnic," Meredith said with a nod, kneeling down next to him.

"Picnic it is," Derek laughed. He pulled out a pair of khaki shorts and a blue polo shirt from the drawer and kissed her cheek. "I didn't know you were a picnic person..."

"I've never been on one, but they sound like fun," she admitted, pulling on her bra and panties.

"It'll be fun," he smiled assuredly. "I think the hotel can put a basket together for us...I read that in the brochure."

Meredith pulled a tank top over her head, then leaned over to kiss him. "Sounds good to me...we may have to buy a blanket to sit on though."

"Blankets are part of the package," he grinned.

"Seriously?"

Derek smiled at her. "We picked a good hotel."

"Yes we did," she giggled. They finished getting dressed, and Meredith walked over to the bureau to brush her hair. "I'm glad we picked up all those extra shifts...now we get to spend two weeks here."

"All of those nights sleeping in the on-call room paid off," Derek agreed, walking up behind her and snaking his arm around his waist.

Meredith spun around and faced him. "Guess so."

--

The sun was shining, and the weather was warm and breezy. A perfect day for a picnic. Together they sat on a little grassy field on their blanket, overlooking one of the Venice canals. A few other couples were scattered about, far enough away so each had privacy. Meredith took a sip of her wine and looked to Derek. "We need to go on more picnics back in Seattle..."

"I agree," Derek laughed, handing her a piece of bruschetta.

Meredith accepted it and immediately took a bite. "This...is awesome," she said with a mouth full of food.

"It's authentic Italian. I hope it'd be good," he pointed out, biting into his own piece. "Damn, this really is good."

"What else do we have in that basket?" she asked with a giggle. She reached over his lap and pulled out some Italian cheeses. "Ooh, these look tasty..."

Derek laughed, just enjoying the fact that she was happy. It was something he never wanted her to lose. "Open them up."

"Way ahead of you," she said with a smile, cutting a piece for herself and one for him. "Here," she said, placing it into his mouth.

"Good," he said as he chewed. "Probably not too healthy though..."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "We're in Italy, Derek. No conscious eating here. You just...eat," she explained.

"You're ruining me, Mer," he said teasingly.

She shoved another piece of bruschetta into her mouth and smirked. "I'm making you aware of the culture. Food is culture."

"I love you," he laughed, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

Meredith smiled at the feel of his lips on her skin. "I love you too," she said softly. "You know I've been to Europe before, right?"

"You have? When?" he asked curiously, cocking his head slightly.

Meredith took a sip of water and looked over at him. "I never told you that?"

"No," he replied as he shook his head. "And now you have to tell me things..."

"I came before I started med school. After college, I wasn't doing much, so one day, I just booked two plane tickets and headed over here--well, not Italy. I didn't get a chance to make it here, but I went other places."

"Who'd you go with?," Derek asked, pouring them both some more wine.

Meredith shrugged. "My friend, Sadie. We went to college, and eventually med school together. But she went off to work in the morgue. Anyway, it was the two of us backpacking around Europe for two months."

"How did you not tell me this?" he asked amusedly.

"I really thought I did. Maybe it was Cristina," Meredith replied. She popped a few grapes into her mouth and sprawled out on her stomach. "Fond memories...," she sighed.

Derek grinned before lying down next to her. "Like?" he hinted.

"You're probably better left in the dark when it comes to the "Meredith finding herself" days," she pointed out with a giggle.

"If you didn't want me to pry, you shouldn't have brought it up in the first place," he shot back jokingly. "Now spill."

"Fine," she sighed, rolling over onto her back, hands propped behind her head. "You can't make fun of me."

"What did you do?" he asked with wide eyes. "You're starting to freak me out."

Meredith groaned. "We didn't do anything illegal. Or if it was illegal, we didn't get in trouble for it. Anyway, we both had a little money--enough to live off of, probably enough to stay in a hotel the whole time if we wanted to--but we were young and stupid, and decided it was best to spend a few nights at this brothel in this little town. I forget what it was called..."

"What the hell?" he asked in sincere shock.

"Oh relax. I wasn't...doing that. These two cute guys offered us a place to sleep. Not with other men...just sleep," she shrugged. "It was fun. In the mornings, we would hang out with them, eat breakfast...then the two of us would go have our daily adventures, and come back to sleep. It was only a few days though. Germany was so nice. It was pretty and sunny. But then we went to...Switzerland, I think. That was nice too."

All Derek could do was stare at her. "I...don't know what to say to that," he confessed, unable to resist laughing.

"It was fun. You should try it sometime," she said with a smirk.

"I'll get right on that," Derek responded sarcastically as he propped himself up on his elbows to kiss her. "What was Switzerland like?"

"We went skiing. I loved that," she smiled.

Derek looked at her curiously. "You ski?"

"I'm a good skier. I went on a ski trip my freshman year of college, and found out that I wasn't half bad," Meredith informed him.

"Well then, we'll have to go skiing. You can teach me," he grinned.

Meredith laughed. "When are we going to have time to go to a ski resort?"

"I'd pay good money to see you in the ski mask and goggles," he said teasingly. "Where did you go after that?"

Meredith bit her lip and thought for a moment. "France, I think. We flew there."

"Better than hitch hiking, I guess," he mused.

"We almost did, but I won us plane tickets," she explained, waiting for his response. She was learning that her husband wasn't much of a risk taker, not like she was in her much wilder post-college days anyway.

"Do I even want to know?" Derek inquired skeptically.

She simply laughed. "You remember in Titanic how the guy won the tickets in a poker game? That's kind of what we did."

"You play poker too? Interesting," he said with a cautious nod, awaiting more of her story.

"Well, it wasn't exactly poker. It was more like strip poker," she said, tossing some more grapes into her mouth. "I was drunk. And apparently I got lucky. I got down to my bra and panties before I won."

Derek stared at her in amazement. Meredith certainly wasn't a quiet, reserved person once you got to know her, but this side of her fascinated him. The uninhibited side of her that didn't give a crap, and just went with the flow. "Uh huh...where was your friend Sadie during all of this?"

"Probably sleeping with one of the guys or something," she shrugged. "The European guys loved me. They probably let me win poker just so they could see me practically naked. They were fun."

"I bet," he chuckled sarcastically.

"A few French guys even proposed to me. They didn't know me or anything. They just came up to me and handed me flowers and stuff. It was sweet," she said nostalgically. "France was the most fun."

"Why is that?" he asked amusedly, clearly captivated by Meredith's stories.

"It was so pretty. We visited the Eiffel Tower, and ate all of this good food. It actually reminded me of Beauty and the Beast--that's really the only Disney movie I ever saw. Maybe that's why I loved it there the most," she said with a smile.

"Where else did you go?" Derek asked, running his fingers over her arm as the two laid back on the picnic blanket.

"England. That was nice too. We saw Big Ben and a few palaces...went on a double decker bus--I got sick afterward. Not really fun for me. But we did a lot of shopping, so I was happy," she rambled.

"You're quite the traveler," he remarked. "I've only been to Cancun."

Meredith looked at him and raised her eyebrows. "_You've_ been to Cancun?"

"Mark made me go," Derek sighed. "We went before our senior year of college. It probably would have been fun if I didn't get food poisoning..."

"Aw, Der," she said, giving him a sad face.

"He insisted we go to this bar--Cancun Lagoon--to get laid. Rather, that's why _he_ wanted to go. Anyway, we ate this weird spicy concoction, and the next thing you know, I'm throwing up in the bathroom," he winced, almost cringing at the memory.

Meredith kissed his cheek. "Poor thing..."

Derek laughed slightly, the creases at the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled. "I was fine a few days later. But by that time, the trip was half over. Mark had to take care of me. It was kind of funny now that I think about it."

"Mark took care of you?" she asked in disbelief.

"Well, it wasn't a mother's love, but he did his best. I think he felt bad. So I took advantage of it," he said with a laugh. "That didn't stop him from bringing girls into the hotel though. That was fun," he stated dryly.

"In the one room hotel? He actually...with you in the room?" she cringed.

Derek shook his head. "I never stayed in the room. I dragged my sick ass out of bed, onto the patio until they were...finished," he explained.

"Hmm," she murmured in sympathy.

"I like your vacation stories more. They're exciting. A little scary, but still entertaining," he said with a chuckle, leaning over and pressing a soft kiss on her lips.

Meredith smiled. "I think being in Italy with you wins."

"I think so too."

The two spent another hour or so just lying together on the picnic blanket, soaking up the warm weather and sunshine. Their honeymoon was by far the best vacation either of them had ever been on. Italy was beautiful, and everything they imagined it would be. Of course, it wasn't so much about the location as it was about spending time with each other.

Once they got back to Seattle, away from the Italian honeymoon bubble, things would go back to normal. Only it wouldn't be the normal they were used to. It would be the start of something new. From now on, they were no longer Meredith Grey and Derek Shepherd. They were the Shepherds, a new family of two. And they couldn't ask for anything more.

**I was debating on writing more of the honeymoon, but I decided that two chapters were sufficient. Hope you liked it. :)**

**Reviews make my day! And happy '09!**


	43. Back in Seattle

**Disclaimer: There's a ring! An honest-to-God ring that Derek's going to put on Meredith's honest-to-God finger in a few weeks! If I owned it, I wouldn't be this excited because I would have written it in the first place. ;)**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them.**

Their plane arrived back in Seattle somewhere around midnight. They were supposed to get in around nine in the evening, but due to delays, it kept getting pushed back. But now, they were home. Earlier in the day, back in the Italy bubble, Meredith and Derek pondered the idea of spending the night in their new home, but after such a long flight and the jet lag that accompanied it, neither wanted to make that trek. So after collecting their luggage, Derek drove them back to Meredith's house where they would stay the night.

Meredith drifted off into a light sleep half way back to the house, and Derek knew there was no way sex was even going to be an option tonight. He wasn't really in the mood anyway. All either of them wanted to do was curl up in bed and sleep. When Derek pulled into the driveway, he noticed the porch light turn on the front door open. At times like these, he was thankful to have roommates.

Alex and Izzie made their way down the steps and walked over to the car. "Welcome home," Izzie smiled, noticing Meredith's still sleeping form in the passenger seat of the car.

"Thanks," Derek smiled tiredly as he shut the car door.

"We'll help you unpack if you want," Alex offered.

Derek nodded. "We can just take a few things in. Mer and I can get the rest tomorrow."

"Okay," they replied in unison, walking around to the trunk.

As Alex and Izzie starting pulling out some suitcases, Derek walked around to other side of the car. "Mer," he whispered. When he got no response, he simply shook his head and smiled. "Come on," he said softly, unbuckling her seat belt and scooping her up out of the seat.

Alex grinned, smirking slightly. "Carry your bride into the house. It's tradition."

Derek laughed, propping Meredith up as she rested her head on his shoulder. "Thanks. I'll be back to help in a minute." He carried Meredith into the house and took her up to their bedroom, gently dropping her down on top of the covers. "I'll be back," he whispered softly.

Meredith simply rolled over and mumbled something incoherent before falling back to sleep. When Derek went back downstairs, he found that Izzie and Alex had most of the car unloaded, and were coming back up the steps with the first shipment. "Thanks, guys. I appreciate it," Derek smiled graciously, running his fingers through his hair.

"Oh, it's no problem," Izzie said simply. "Where do you want us to put these?"

"You can just leave them in the foyer. I'll get them in the morning. Thanks," he replied, walking outside to retrieve more bags. Eventually, the three of them managed to get most of the suitcases and things into the house, and Derek trudged up the stairs behind Izzie and Alex. He said goodnight to them before entering his bedroom, smiling as he saw his wife in the same position he'd left her in.

Derek quickly stripped down to his boxers, then pulled the jeans off Meredith's legs, leaving her in her panties and tee shirt. He crawled into bed next to her and pulled her close. "I love you," he whispered, kissing the back of her head. Meredith, still in a dream-like state, took his hand and laced their fingers. Before long, Derek too felt himself slip into sleep, happy to be back in Seattle with his wife.

--

Meredith woke up the next morning, pleasantly surprised to find herself back in her own bed. She didn't remember getting home, but was just thankful that they had arrived back safely. She rolled over in bed and found Derek sprawled out on his stomach sleeping soundly. "I love you," she whispered softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

After getting up out of bed, she slipped on some sweat pants and walked downstairs. She entered into the kitchen and found a note from Izzie and Alex that said welcome home, and that they'd be home after work to help move things into the new house. Meredith smiled sadly to herself. As much as she couldn't wait to move into her new home with Derek, she knew she'd miss Alex and Izzie. They had become like brother and sister in every sense but blood. But that was one of the perks of practically living at the hospital. She knew she'd see them everyday anyway.

She got herself a cup of coffee, then starting unpacking the suitcases in the living room. While putting in the first of many loads of laundry, Meredith heard Derek walking down the steps. "Hey," she called from the laundry room.

Derek entered the kitchen and smiled at her. "Morning."

"I'm glad you convinced me that we'd need the day off today. This jet lag thing sucks," she yawned, taking a seat next to him at the counter.

He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "I carried you in the house last night," he pointed out with a chuckle. "You were exhausted."

"I could have walked," she giggled.

"That's okay. I got to carry you over the threshold," Derek smirked.

Meredith rolled her eyes and brushed some hair off her face. "Are you going to do that again today?"

"If you let me," he said with a laugh. "It's tradition."

"Well then...I guess I might let you."

Derek smiled as he refilled their coffee cups. "Good."

"So Alex and Izzie said they'd help us take some stuff over to the house later on," Meredith said.

"Sounds good," he yawned.

"Okay," Meredith nodded before she yawned too. "This all feels oddly the same..."

"Except now...we have wedding rings on," he grinned, taking her left hand in his.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and smiled softly. "Now you're stuck with me," she teased.

"Hmm...you're stuck with me too," he replied, kissing the top of her head.

"So did you want to start packing some stuff up today? We have work tomorrow, so we can at least start to make a dent in it," Meredith suggested.

Derek nodded. "Sounds good."

"But first..." Meredith shifted slightly in her chair and faced him. "A morning quickie. Morning quickies always wake me up" she whispered in his ear.

He pulled her onto his lap and began kissing her neck. "Yeah?"

"You should know by now that I'm always horny in the morning," she reminded him, tilting her head to the side.

"I hope that never changes," he smiled, running his tongue over her earlobe.

"It won't," she assured him before wrapping her arms around his neck. "Kitchen table."

"What?" Derek asked.

Meredith pulled back a bit, smiling at him coyly. "We need to make this whole moving out thing fun...may as well christen every room of the old house."

"And the new house too, I hope..." he pointed out, carrying her over to the table. Derek set her down on top of it before pushing the place mats onto the chairs, along with the little, flowery centerpiece.

"Of course," she giggled. "We wouldn't want to break tradition."

Derek laid her back on the table before leaning over and kissing her. "No. We wouldn't..."

--

Meredith didn't realize how much stuff one room could hold. After their morning round of kitchen table sex, she and Derek began tackling her mother's den. The shelves and cabinets and drawers seemed endless. Izzie and Alex weren't moving out of the house any time soon, so she knew there really wasn't a need to empty out the room, but there were some things from her childhood she wanted to take with her. Things she had forgotten all about until she began opening boxes, much to Derek's amusement.

"What is that?" Derek asked, looking curiously at the stuffed animal Meredith was holding.

"It's Corky," Meredith stated, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "I've had him since I was three."

Derek took it from her and cocked his head slightly. "Is it a bunny?"

"Yes," she giggled. "Can't you tell?"

"It's cute," he teased. "Who came up with the name Corky?"

"Me," Meredith laughed. "Obviously, I was very creative..."

"You must have been," he agreed amusedly.

"I remember his eye fell off at the playground and I cried. When we got home, my mom sewed it back on," she said with a small smile. "She even let me help."

Derek kissed her cheek and smiled sadly. "Yeah?"

"It's one of the few good memories I have of my mother...," Meredith said softly. "I want to take this with me," she breathed, putting the small, blue bunny into the box.

"What else is in there?" he asked as the two leaned over the cardboard box, rummaging through the contents for something good.

Meredith gasped as something caught her eye. "Oh my God!"

"What?" he asked, slightly startled.

"Anatomy Jane!" she squealed happily.

Derek quirked his eyebrows and look to his wife curiously. "What is that?"

"She's like Barbie, only creepier and much cooler," Meredith explained, pulling off the hospital gown and popping off the front piece. "All of the pieces are still here..."

"That's like...the strangest thing I've ever seen," Derek laughed.

"Oh look, she still has her little twosh," she giggled, pulling out the green plastic piece.

"Her what?" he asked confusedly.

"Anatomy Jane had detachable organs. I could never remember the real names, so I made up names. Like, the twosh was next to the chubble. And that was connected to the slivvy. And oh, look! It's the jelly pouch," Meredith said with a smile.

Derek looked at her and smirked. "Jelly pouch?"

"I doubt you could say _uterus_ when you were five," she retorted, rolling her eyes. "Wait a sec, she came with an attachable fetus and pop-out stomach too..." she remembered. Meredith leaned over the box and eventually found the little plastic pieces.

"That just made the doll ten times creepier," Derek said with a laugh. "Your mom got this for you?"

Meredith attempted to attach the baby to the doll and nodded. "Yeah. It's a weird thing to give to a five year old, but I kind of liked it."

"Is she going with us?" he asked amusedly.

"Of course she is. Our kids are going to play with her one day too," she said softly.

Derek couldn't help but smile at her comment. "Okay," he whispered, leaning in to kiss her sweetly. It was times like this that made him remember why he fell in love with her in the first place. She said things that made his heart skip a beat.

Meredith carefully put the doll back together--fetus attached, slipped the blue gown back on, and gently placed her in the box. "What else do we have in here?"

"We're not making any progress," he pointed out, chuckling slightly.

"I haven't seen this stuff in twenty-five years. Some of it's important," she explained. "Like this..." Meredith pulled a small wooden picture frame and peered at the photo.

"Is that you?" Derek asked. He scooted closer to her and smiled when he saw the photo of a young Meredith, smiling for her school picture. "How old are you in this?"

Meredith bit her lip and thought for a moment. "Probably first or second grade."

"You're adorable. The pigtails and missing teeth," he laughed. "This is coming with us..."

"So you can make fun of me?" she asked with a smirk.

"So we can show our girls one day," Derek said; his eyes full of the love and adoration reserved just for her.

Meredith simply smiled and kissed his cheek. "If we have boys, you realize that gives me license to mock your psychic powers forever, right?"

"Deal," he replied confidently.

"Pretty sure of yourself, huh?" she joked, looking at the picture in her hands.

"I am, in fact." Derek gave her a cocky grin and kissed her temple.

All Meredith could do was laugh. "Okay then." She put the photo back in the box and with Derek's assistance, taped it up so it could be shipped off to the new house.

While she was rummaging for more treasures in a nearby box, Derek was busy retrieving a box from the closet. "Damn!" she heard him say, and immediately whipped her head around.

"What? What's the matter?" she asked worriedly.

Derek set the box on the ground and examined his palm. "Splinter," he sighed.

"You scared me," she breathed, running her fingers through her hair. "Here. Let me see." She hopped up off the floor and took his hand in hers so she could look at his palm more closely. "It's a teeny tiny splinter, Derek. Not a huge shard of wood."

"It hurts," he said. "The shelves obviously aren't made of finished wood."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You're such a baby. Wait here, I'll get the tweezers."

"I can probably just pull it out with my fingers," he suggested.

"That's how it gets infected. Just wait two seconds and let me take it out the right way," she called as she made her way out of the den and up the stairs.

Meredith returned moments later with tweezers, an alcohol wipe, and a Band-Aid. "Let your wife be wifely and take out your splinter," she giggled, taking his wrist and pulling him down onto the couch next to her. She turned on the lamp on the side table and set his hand on top of hers. "Okay."

"Please don't hurt me," he laughed, dropping his head on the back of the couch.

"I would never hurt you," she said, pretending to be offended. "Now hold still."

Meredith made sure she had a grip on the small splinter before pulling it out. Satisfied with her work, she examined his palm under the light and nodded proudly. "All better."

"You did it already?" Derek asked in surprise. "I didn't even feel you do anything."

"I'm just that good..." she giggled, cleaning the area with the alcohol wipe and sticking the Band-Aid over top of it. "See, I told you I wouldn't hurt you," she said as she kissed his cheek.

Derek smiled lovingly at her. "Thank you," he whispered, tilting her chin up to kiss her.

"Hmm...you're welcome," she murmured against his lips.

"I think this is a good time for a sex break..." he said with a grin, proceeding to gently lay her back on the couch.

Meredith smiled up at him and ran her fingers through his hair. "And why is that?"

"Well for one, you always give me sex when I'm wounded. And second...well, actually, I don't think I need to give you a second reason," Derek laughed as he kissed her neck.

"A splinter barely qualifies you as wounded. But either way, you talked me into it," she giggled, wrapping her legs around his waist while pulling her shirt off.

"I knew I would," he replied cockily. "I love you." Derek pressed his lips against hers, slipping his tongue into her mouth.

Meredith moaned in pleasure. Derek's tongue in her mouth always did that to her. "Get naked," she ordered, tugging at the bottom of his tee shirt before pulling it off of him.

"You too," he said as he climbed off of her and proceeded to undress.

"You realize that at this rate, we're never going to move into our house, right?" she asked jokingly while he hovered over her once again.

Derek laughed. "Sex trumps packing. Sex _always_ trumps packing."

"I kind of assumed it did," she said with a giggle. "Let's make it a quickie, though. We have things to do..."

"I can do quickies," he whispered, leaning down to kiss her as he slipped inside of her.

Meredith gasped and clutched the back of the couch with her hands. "Oh God..." she moaned.

"Good?" he asked smugly as he began to move within her.

"Shut up," she whispered; her eyes closed in bliss.

Derek smiled, pressed his lips to hers once again. "Okay."

--

By the time Alex and Izzie returned home from work, Meredith and Derek had packed the important things from the den, and were now working on the bedroom. "Hey," Izzie smiled, peering into the room.

Meredith looked over to her friend. "Hey."

"Whenever you guys are ready to go, let us know," she said kindly. "Oh, and I'm ordering a pizza. Any requests?"

"Anything with meat," Meredith giggled.

Izzie laughed. "Okay," she replied, turning around and walking into the bathroom.

Derek noticed the somewhat solemn look on Meredith's face. "You're going to miss them," he said knowingly.

"Yeah," Meredith breathed. "I am. As much as I want to move out, I will miss them."

"Well, we're keeping the old bed here. Maybe we could..."

Meredith laughed and rolled her eyes. "What? Sleepover once in a while?"

"Well, I guess not. But our kids are going to sleep in this house when Izzie and Alex babysit," Derek said with a grin.

"When you say things like that, you make me cry. And I'm already feeling all sentimental from packing up childhood crap," she said, leaning over and kissing him.

"I remember a time when talking about kids gave you a panicked look in your eye. And now it makes you all mushy," he teased as he put some of his clothes into boxes.

Meredith handed him the tape and smirked at him. "It's your fault."

"How is that my fault?" Derek asked amusedly.

"Before you came along, I didn't even want kids. And now, any kind of baby talk turns me into this sappy thing. Like I said...your fault," she concluded, dropping some of her sweaters into the cardboard box.

"Fine. You can blame me," he said with a chuckle.

"Thank you," Meredith smiled. "So are we sleeping at the house tonight?"

"As long as we have coffee in the morning, I think we could," Derek replied.

Meredith nodded in agreement. "I'll have Iz put together an overnight package."

"Sounds good," Derek laughed.

"Oh crap...condoms," she remembered. Meredith reached over to the nightstand and opened the drawer, pulling out a string of them. "If we forgot those, it would have been bad."

"Yeah. It would have been..." he smirked as he kissed her lightly. "Good thinking."

Meredith tossed them into her tote bag which was sitting on the bed before pulling the last of her clothes from the closet. She deposited them in the box at her feet, and knelt down next to him. "I think we've done enough packing for one day," she whispered, nipping on his earlobe.

"You want sex," Derek grinned. He pulled her into his lap and kissed her neck, causing Meredith to erupt into goose bumps.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and played with the curls at the nape. "I'm horny today," she giggled.

"I can tell," he murmured, pressing his lips to hers softly.

"Think we can...before the food gets here?" she asked almost incoherently, panting slightly as Derek dipped his hand down the waistband of her panties.

Derek gently began massaging her center with his fingers and Meredith arched her body into his. "Derek," she breathed.

When he removed his hand, Meredith nearly gasped in surprise. "What the hell?" she asked, glaring at him.

"We're going to do this the right way," he whispered. Before Meredith could protest, he scooped her up and dropped her down onto the bed.

"Just so you know, what you were just doing...that's not really a wrong way," Meredith explained half-heartedly.

He pulled her shirt over her head and smiled at her. "It's much better when you're naked," Derek grinned, wasting no time in pulling her pants and panties off her legs.

"Now I'm naked and you're not..." she stated obviously, giggling when he started tickling her sides. "Stop!" she squealed.

"No," he replied, smirking at her as he continued his assault, wishing he could keep her laughing forever.

Meredith continued to squirm beneath him, but quickly thought of a way to get him to stop. "No sex then. My legs...closed to you," she stated, crossing one leg over the other tightly.

In an instant, his tickling ceased and he looked at her, unable to resist chuckling as she regained her breath. "No fair."

"Very fair..." she disagreed, sighing dramatically. "I guess I'll just have to take care of myself in the shower. Alex just installed the removable showerhead..." She sat up on the bed and hopped off. Just as she was about to open the door, Derek wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her back towards him.

"I think you'd prefer me to a showerhead," he grinned cockily as he kept his arms around her.

Meredith could only giggle in his arms, knowing he was right. "Yeah?" she asked, pushing him back onto the bed; her breasts crushed into his chest. "Want to test that theory?"

"I'd love to," Derek practically growled. Within seconds, he was naked too, and had her pinned beneath him.

"Should I let you?" she asked teasingly, reaching over to the nightstand for a condom while Derek hastily removed his clothes. She played with it in between her fingers and looked up at him with a smirk.

Derek ran his hands over her thighs and felt her body react to him, arching slightly into his touch. "I think you should."

"Okay," she whispered, rolling the condom onto him expertly as she always did. Meredith pulled him down to her and kissed him. "Love you." A soft moan escaped her throat when he eased inside of her.

Derek began sucking on the soft skin of her neck and she mewed again in pleasure. "Better than a showerhead?" he asked smugly as he began to thrust slowly.

She grabbed his ass and pushed him deeper inside of her. Derek gasped in surprise and Meredith laughed. "I'll let you know."

"Evil," he smirked, hungrily kissing her again while he kept up the rhythm.

Meredith threw her head back in pleasure as he picked up the pace and gripped at the sheets. "I know," she panted.

"I still love you," he whispered, bracing his arms under her shoulders to keep control.

She gladly let him take the lead and kissed him again. "I know."

**Kind of fillerish, I know. But they're back in Seattle and starting to get themselves moved out. And a little porny MerDer is always fun. ;)**

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	44. Moving Day

**Disclaimer: I really wish it was, but sadly, it's not mine.**

**Sorry for the wait. College is annoying and likes to drive me insane. Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them. Enjoy the update!**

Today was Meredith and Derek's first day back after the honeymoon. Waking up to an alarm clock for the first time in two weeks certainly sucked, but both would admit that they were starting to miss the OR. As fun as it was vacationing in Italy, nothing compared to wielding a scalpel.

After rounds, Meredith bumped into Derek in the hall on her way to pick up her patient's pre-op labs. "Oh. Hey," she smiled.

Derek kissed her cheek. "Hey. Where are you going?"

"The lab," she told him, brushing her bangs away from her face. "I'm on OB. I could have been on neuro but my idiot husband decided to choose Cristina," she said jokingly.

Derek looked to her and grinned. "Your idiot husband...that hurts," he sighed, pretending to be offended. "Actually, I have an ulterior motive in mind. That's why I chose her."

Meredith eyed him curiously as the two walked down the hall together. "What kind of ulterior motive?"

"Your birthday is in two days...I need to run some things by her," he explained vaguely.

She knew that no matter how much she pried, he wasn't going to tell her anything, so instead she just smiled. "Okay then."

"You're not going to try to weasel anything out of me?" he asked amusedly.

"Nope. I'm not," she said, shaking her head. "As long as I get food, sex, and the signature cheesiness I'm sure you have in store, I'll be happy."

"You get those things every day," Derek replied smugly, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall as Meredith awaited the labs. "But yes, those things are part of the birthday package."

Meredith rolled her eyes and giggled at his feigned arrogance. "Looking forward to it."

"And I'm letting you scrub in with me that day too. I'm even going to let you cut," he informed her, knowing something like that would thrill her more than any material gift.

"Seriously?" she asked, the smile on her face something that always made Derek's heart skip a beat.

"Seriously," he nodded with a grin. "Am I still your idiot husband?"

She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him softly. "Hmm...no."

The sound of Derek's pager interrupted them, much to their chagrin. He unclipped it from his scrub pants and read it. "Cristina."

"Okay. Love you," she said, quickly kissing him again.

"Love you too. I'll see you at lunch, Dr. Shepherd," he grinned enthusiastically, using her new name for the first time.

Meredith gave his hand a gentle squeeze and smiled. She had only been a Shepherd for two weeks, but in that short time, she felt more part of a family than she had ever felt as a Grey. "I'll see you then, Dr. Shepherd."

--

Derek met Cristina back up on the surgical floor where she was taking down notes at the nurses' station. "Dr. Yang," he greeted with a smile.

Cristina turned her head and looked to her boss. "I just ordered the CT. My intern is taking Mr. Sansom down now."

"Good," Derek said with a nod.

"So...how was the honeymoon?" she asked unenthusiastically.

Derek looked at her strangely and cocked his head. He and Cristina rarely talked unless it was work related, so her question was a bit odd. "It was great."

"I'm just being the supportive friend of the married couple," she shrugged in explanation.

"Aah, got it," he grinned. "Thanks...for asking."

Cristina continued to take notes but managed to acknowledge him with a simple "Mmhmm..."

Derek decided that now was a good time to ask her about some gifts his wife might like for her birthday. "So, I need your help with something."

"Is this work related?" she asked dryly, handing the chart to the nurse before putting her pen in the pocket of her scrub shirt.

"No," Derek stated simply. "It's about Meredith."

Cristina raised her eyebrows in question. "Okay..."

As the two walked down the hall toward the elevator, Derek explained the situation. "Her birthday is coming up, and I wanted to run some things by you."

"Okay," she nodded, surprisingly willing to help.

"I'm thinking of getting us a dog," Derek said with a smile as they stepped into the elevator to go read the CT results.

"Like, an _actual_ dog?" Cristina asked confusedly.

"I don't know what other kind there is, but yes, an actual dog," he confirmed. "Is it too soon, or...?"

She thought for a moment, staring at the elevator doors before spinning on her heels to face her boss. "I think she'd want a say."

"Yeah, I'd find a way to bring it up, then we could go get one together," Derek explained with a smile. "Do you think she'd like that?"

"Probably," she shrugged. "Something like that has your names written all over it."

"I think so, yes?" Derek asked with a smile, playing into her sarcasm. The two stepped off the elevator and Derek continued speaking in that overly-excited, lovey dovey tone he always used when taking about Meredith, resulting in an eye roll from Cristina. "Meredith is the hardest person to shop for on the planet. I've been thinking up ideas for months. So far I just got her a few things I know she wanted, and I had something shipped from Italy that I think she'll like."

Cristina looked at him suspiciously. "How did you manage that one?"

"Very carefully," Derek said with a laugh. "But I know she'll love it."

--

Up on the OB floor, Meredith entered her patient's room, a first time mother and father awaiting the birth of their first child. "Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Dougherty. I know Dr. Jensen was already in here, but I'm her resident, Dr. Grey--Shepherd, I mean. Dr. Shepherd," Meredith said, correcting herself. Using her new name was going to take some getting used to.

"New bride?" Mrs. Dougherty asked with a small smile.

Meredith laughed slightly, unconsciously spinning her ring on her finger. "Yeah. I got married two weeks ago."

"Congratulations!" the expectant mother said happily. "This little one was a honeymoon surprise actually," Nina said, rubbing her pregnant belly.

Meredith swallowed hard and smiled, mentally calculating when she was supposed to get her period. She breathed a sigh of relief when she remembered that she wasn't due for another week, and hadn't missed it. It was insane for her to worry in the first place considering she and Derek were still a condom ad, but because she still had the Grey genes, something like that obviously caused a small panic inside of her.

"We weren't planning on having a baby for a few years, but apparently now was the time. So here we are..." Mr. Dougherty smiled, kissing his wife's cheek.

"Well, congratulations. You both seem so happy," Meredith said kindly. She pulled a pen from her pocket and began writing down her patient's stats. "Do you know what you're having?"

"Nope. We wanted to be surprised. Jim swears it's a girl, but the rest of our family says it's a boy. I have no idea," she laughed.

Meredith examined the woman's progress and smiled at her. "Well, you're at six centimeters, so you should be finding out soon enough. You've had an epidural, right?"

"I wouldn't be this happy if I didn't have an epidural," Nina pointed out with a laugh. "What time do you think I'll deliver?"

Meredith looked at her watch and thought for a moment. "Well, you're at a six now, and it's almost noon. Because it's your first baby, I'd guess before four o'clock if you keep progressing regularly," she explained.

"Okay then," she breathed, running her hand over her abdomen. "And everything looks good?"

"Everything is good. Don't hesitate to page me if there are any problems, okay?" Meredith said politely before exiting the room. As she walked down the hall, she couldn't help but smile a little at the thought that in a few year's time, she and Derek could be becoming first time parents.

After visiting with her patient, Meredith was kept busy for a few hours down in the pit after Alex had paged her for help. There was a fire at a local restaurant, and both employees and restaurant goers had to be treated for smoke inhalation amongst other things like minor cuts and burns. She had barely had a moment to sit down when she got an emergency page to Mrs. Dougherty's room. She quickly paged her interns down to help with the chaos of the ER before hurrying upstairs to the OB floor. "Page Dr. Jensen," Meredith called out to one of the nurses nearby.

Meredith entered Mrs. Dougherty's room and upon checking her, found out that she was ready to push. As Meredith was getting things ready, the nurse entered the room. "Dr. Jensen is in surgery. She said she'd be here as soon as she could, but said she trusts you to take care of it," she informed her.

Rather than yell at the nurse or begin to panic, Meredith simply let out a deep breath. "Okay," she nodded. Meredith quickly pulled her hair back into a ponytail and put on a pair of gloves. She looked over at the monitor and saw that her patient was about to have a contraction. "Alright, Nina. I need you to take a deep breath and push when you have your next contraction, okay?"

Nina nodded and bore down when the next wave of pain hit her. Meredith had never delivered a baby on her own before, but had seen it done a few times. So she just had to have faith that she really could do it. "Okay, good. Just relax for a minute," she said calmly as the nurse tied a sterile blue gown around Meredith's neck.

When the next contraction came, the expectant mother pushed again and Meredith could see the baby emerging. "Good. I can see the baby coming down. Just a few more pushes, okay?" Meredith said. She smiled slightly when she saw the woman's husband whispering words of encouragement into her ear and kissing her forehead.

After a few more pushes, Meredith guided the baby into the world and let out a deep breath when she began crying. "It's a girl!" Meredith announced with a smile. She took the baby in the crook of her arm and suctioned out her nose and throat with the suctioning bulb. After the new father cut the cord, Meredith placed the infant on her mother's chest and watched as the new parents cried and celebrated at the same time. She couldn't even imagine what that kind of love felt like. But there was no doubt in her mind that one day, she'd know.

--

Later on that day as her shift was nearing an end, Meredith was peering into the nursery, smiling slightly at the baby girl she had just delivered. It was still strange for her to fathom that just a few hours ago, this baby was inside her mother, and all of the sudden, she was this true to life little person wrapped in a pink blanket sleeping soundly.

As she looked in the glass, she felt someone come up behind her and kiss her cheek. "Hey," Derek said softly.

Meredith smiled at the feeling of his lips on her skin. "Hey. How did you know I was up here?"

"Izzie told me," he replied. "I'm horny and wanted to drag you off to an on-call room before we leave..." Derek grinned.

"Somehow, talking about sex in the nursery seems wrong," Meredith pointed out.

Derek smirked. "That's why there's babies in there to begin with."

"After seeing a baby come out of a _you know what_, you probably wouldn't be so horny anymore," she laughed, brushing some hair off her face. "I delivered her a few hours ago," she told him, pointing to the little, dark haired baby with her hand curled up under her chin.

Derek looked over at her and cocked his head slightly. "By yourself?"

"Yep," she whispered.

"Congratulations," he smiled, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Meredith rolled her eyes and giggled softly. "I'm not the one who gave birth..."

"Even still. I'm proud of you," Derek insisted as he wrapped his arm loosely around her waist.

"She's a surprise honeymoon baby," Meredith told him, running her fingers over the wooden ledge under the glass.

"I don't think we made one of those. We were a honeymoon condom ad," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled slightly. "I think that's probably what they thought too..." she pointed out.

Derek froze and pulled back, a look of curiosity in his eyes. "Mer, do you think you're...?"

"What?" she gasped. "No no no! I'm not. I was just thinking, you know, we have...a plan. _Her parents_ had a plan," she said, pointing to the tiny girl. "And I just think that we should be prepared...if it happens before we plan..."

"Mer," Derek said softly, effectively cutting off her rambling. "If that happens, I'm fine with it--more than fine with it. We agreed on trying in a year, but if we're meant to have one sooner, so be it. I'd be thrilled."

"They're so happy. When I saw them with her, they just...I don't think I've ever seen people fall in love with something so quickly," Meredith said with a small smile.

Derek searched her eyes for a moment, noticing the small flecks of blue within the green orbs. "Meredith," he began softly. "We'll have that. One day, you and I know what that feels like." He kissed her forehead and pulled her close to him.

"Sorry. I'm pre-PMS-ing and jet lagged, and I think I spent too much time today on this cutesy maternity floor with the booties and the animal pictures. You probably think I'm nuts," she sighed, wiping away a stray tear that escaped her eye.

Derek chuckled slightly and rubbed his hands up and down her arms. "You call it nuts, I call it adorable."

"Shut up," Meredith giggled, looking back to the little baby behind the glass.

"You okay?" he asked as he tucked some hair behind her ear.

Meredith nodded, slightly embarrassed that she was crying. "I guess my wife instincts kicked in, and now I'm all nesty and gooey and disgusting. And I'd probably let you get me pregnant right now if you asked nicely."

"Meredith," he laughed heartily, loving how she never ceased to make him smile. "I love you."

She wrapped her arms around her husband and gave him a small hug. "I love you, too," she breathed. "Ready to go?"

"Yep." Derek laced his fingers through hers and together, the two walked down the hall of the nursery.

--

After getting changed, they had to drive back to Meredith's house to get some more boxes that would be going with them to the new house. There were still a few odds and ends that needed to be gathered, like utensils. Last night, after arriving back at the house, Meredith was warming up the dinner Izzie had packed up for them when she realized that they hadn't grabbed any forks or knives. They had no choice but to use their fingers, which ultimately led to sex on the kitchen floor. Not a bad way to christen the kitchen, but some silverware would be nice.

While Derek and Alex were busy putting boxes into Derek's Land Rover, Izzie and Meredith were at the grocery store, picking up some food for the house. Meredith had no idea what they would need, and Izzie offered her shopping expertise. When they got home, they found Derek and Alex on the couch watching ESPN. The two girls looked to them and shook their heads. "Look at our hard working men..." Izzie smirked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"We finished packing up the car an hour ago. We were about to call search and rescue to come find the two of you," Derek grinned, reaching into the bag of pretzels and tossing one in his mouth.

"They were giving out free samples in practically every aisle. We had to be good patrons and try them all," Meredith explained with a giggle.

"Bring any back for us?" Alex asked jokingly.

Izzie laughed. "I'm making dinner. You can wait an hour. Are you two staying?" she asked.

"Nah, I think we're gonna go. Thanks, though," Meredith said with a gracious smile.

"Okay," Izzie nodded. "Oh, and Mer, I'm going to put together some easy to follow recipes. I'll give them to you tomorrow."

Meredith laughed. "Thanks, Iz."

Derek got up from the couch and kissed Meredith's cheek. "Thank you both for helping out these past few days. We really appreciate it."

"It's no problem," Izzie smiled, curling up on the couch next to Alex. "Obviously, it's your house, you can stop by whenever."

"You know that if you two wanted to move into our room, you can. I mean, you don't have to, but it has more space and the attached bathroom. So feel free to if you wanted," Meredith rambled.

"Seriously?" Izzie asked with wide eyes. "But that's..."

"It's yours if you want it," Derek said graciously.

"Thanks," Alex said with a nod. "We really appreciate that."

"Sure," Meredith said softly. "We'll see you guys tomorrow."

--

Meredith stood at the counter of her new home. This was all still strange to her--not in a bad way though. She and Derek finally had privacy. They didn't have to worry about roommates barging in during sex, or be forced into the bedroom for intimacy. Now they could just be themselves. Meredith turned to Derek and kissed him quickly. "Love you."

"I love you too," he said softly.

"This is still weird," she pointed out as she put some salad into bowls.

Derek grabbed two of their new plates from the cabinet and smiled at her. "What do you mean?"

"This...us...being here alone. It's nice," Meredith shrugged.

The two decided to take advantage of the warm summer night, so they ate outback on the patio. After setting their dishes down, Derek pulled his chair next to Meredith's and kissed her cheek. "I love it."

"We could even walk around naked, and no one would ever know..." she suggested playfully.

Derek took a sip of his drink and smirked at her. "We could even have sex out here."

"I plan on it," Meredith giggled. "We still need to christen the rest of this house."

"Yes we do..." he agreed.

"I could scream as loud as I wanted to," she whispered into his ear, biting gently on his earlobe.

Derek groaned in appreciation. "You're making it kind of hard to eat Mer..."

"I think I'm just making it kind of hard," she quipped, looking down at his growing erection with a naughty glint in her eye.

"That too," Derek chuckled.

Meredith decided to stop teasing him so they could eat. There would be plenty of sex later on, as was the rule of newly married couples. "Fine. I'll behave," she smiled before changing the subject. "So what did you and Alex talk about?"

"He wants to propose," Derek said as he took a bite of the chicken they had prepared.

Meredith nearly choked on her water. "What?"

"We got to talking, and I guess he just figured he could tell me. I don't think he told anyone else, so don't say anything to anyone."

"Derek! How could you not tell me this?" she shrieked.

Derek tried to stifle a laugh. "I was going to. I guess it just slipped my mind."

"Well, did he say when? Or how?" Meredith questioned curiously.

"No, he just said he was thinking about it. Apparently, when we were away, he and Izzie spent a lot of time together alone. I guess he figured it's the right time. I don't know. I can't translate it into girl talk," he chuckled.

"Aww," Meredith said, wiping the moisture from her eyes. "That's so sweet..."

"You're a mess, huh?" Derek joked, handing her a napkin so she could wipe the tears from her eyes.

"Shut up," she smirked. "It's just that...they're like my brother and sister--not like that--I mean, in a non-gross way, because that would mean my brother wanted to marry my sister, but I'm just...I'm happy for them," Meredith rambled.

Derek smiled softly at her. "Me too."

"And yes, I am a mess," she giggled.

"That's okay," he said, kissing her cheek. "I still love you."

--

Meredith sighed contentedly as Derek rolled off of her, the latest round of sex having just ended moments ago. "Oh God," she panted. "Promise me...that sex will always...be this good."

"It will be," he said, reaching over for her hand and kissing it softly.

"That was..." she breathed, unable to find the right word as she kicked the covers off her sweat slickened body.

Derek drew lazy designs over her bare stomach with his finger. "Amazing," he breathed.

"Stop staring at my boobs," Meredith giggled, making no attempt to cover herself.

"You're completely naked. How can I not stare?" he asked with a smirk. "Besides, I happen to love your boobs..."

Meredith looked down at her body and shrugged. "You're the only one I don't mind being naked around."

"Well, I'd hope so," Derek chuckled, pulling her into his arms and kissing her forehead. "You're beautiful," he whispered.

"I'm sorry I went all weird on you today in the nursery," she said quietly, staring into the blue eyes of her husband that she loved so much.

"You weren't weird," he said reassuringly.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Yes I was."

"It's okay," Derek responded. He pulled her closer to him and tickled her back softly with his fingers.

She arched her body into his touch; her breasts pressing into his chest. "Hmm...Cristina was right. Babies make you toxic."

"If by toxic you mean adorable, then yes," he joked.

"It wasn't adorable," Meredith argued. "I don't know. We've only been married for two weeks, but already I'm feeling the urge to nest, which is so...Izzie. Not me. And then tonight when you were in the shower, I was bored so I went into the nursery, and got to thinking about where we would...put the crib, and the rocking chair, and what kind of curtains would look cute with the yellow paint we used," she rambled, resulting in a smile from Derek.

"Mer," he began softly. "Do you...want a baby...sooner?"

Meredith sighed before going off on another ramble. Usually, Derek would cut her off with a kiss, but instead he listened to her intently as she voiced her thoughts. "No. If we had one now...it's just that we have a lot going on right now. I just started my third year of residency today, and there's a lot more stress that comes along with rotations, and starting to think about a speciality...and adding a baby to the mix would make us both..."

"Insane?" he offered.

"Yeah. Insane sounds accurate," Meredith breathed. "Did you...want one now?"

Derek thought for a moment and kissed her forehead. "Yes and no. I mean, if it happened, I'd be fine with it. But I think waiting would be better for us. And it's only a year. That'll give us time to get ourselves ready--and the house," he pointed out.

Meredith rested her palm on his cheek and kissed him. "Yeah. You're right."

"This kind of throws a wrench in my birthday plans for you," he chuckled.

"Was your plan to knock me up?" she asked sarcastically, unable to hide the smile on her face.

"No," Derek laughed. He knew he wasn't going to get off that easy so he decided to divulge his idea two days early. "Actually, I was thinking we could get a dog."

Meredith pulled back a bit and looked at him. "Like, and _actual_ dog?"

"Cristina said the exact same thing. What other kind of dog is there?" he joked.

"I just...seriously?" she asked, slightly surprised his suggestion.

Derek nodded. "Yeah. I know it's still early, and if you wanted to hold off, we can. But I just thought it might be nice. And after all the nesting talk today, I was thinking it would make you happy," he explained, brushing some wavy strands of sex hair off her face.

Instead of giving him a yes or no answer, Meredith pressed her lips to his. She ran her tongue over his lips and smiled when he gave her entry into his mouth. Derek wrapped his arms around her torso and pulled her on top of him. As she kissed him, she knew that the spark between them would never fade; that kissing him would always give her that tingly, warm feeling that made her never want to _stop_ kissing him. Only when the desperate need for breath took over did she pull back.

Meredith rested her forehead against her husband's and smiled softly. "So I'll take that as a yes?", Derek asked with a small smirk.

"Yes," she said, still slightly out of breath.

"Yeah?" Derek asked, keeping her wrapped in his arms above him.

Meredith began kissing his jaw line. "Mmhmm..."

"Want to have sex again?" he asked as he began lavishing attention on her breasts with his mouth. Derek knew he had gotten the answer when she began grinding her hips into his pelvis. He gave a slight groan in appreciation. "Yes?"

Meredith ran her fingers through the dark curls on his head and smiled. "Always..."

**I know we all want McBabies, but right now really isn't the best time. And just keep in mind that a year in fic time isn't actually a year. After Mer's birthday, I might jump in the timeline a bit. I haven't decided yet. Either way, I hope you liked it.**

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	45. An Addition

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

**Thanks for the reviews. I really appreciate them.**

"Happy birthday," Derek smiled as he leaned over the bed and kissed his wife, who was still half asleep under the blanket. Meredith murmured something inaudible in response, making no attempt to sit up, so he simply set her coffee on the nightstand and crawled back into bed with her. It was still early, so he figured a few quiet minutes in bed together were okay.

Derek kissed the back of her head and wrapped his arm around her waist. Meredith sighed softly, taking his hand in her own and scooting her body closer to his. "Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome." He rubbed her arm softly for a few minutes, and eventually, she rolled around in his arms to face him.

"Hey," she said with a small smile; her voice still crackly and full of sleep.

Derek smiled back at her. "Morning."

"I'm thirty two," she frowned, pouting her lips slightly.

"Already?" he asked.

Meredith brushed her hair from her face and nodded. "I was born at four in the morning. I bet that pissed my mom off..." she giggled.

"Probably did," Derek chuckled.

As some of the sleepiness wore off, she stretched out a bit and smiled at him. "You're still letting me cut today, right?"

"Of course," he agreed. "It's a corpus callosotomy, so you're in luck."

Meredith's eyes brightened and she gasped. "Are you serious?"

"I am," Derek nodded. "I'm going to let you do the whole thing. You're ready. I'll be there to watch and help you if you need it, but this is your day. You can do it," he said assuringly.

One of the things she loved most about Derek was his confidence in her. Sometimes, she wasn't so sure in herself, but Derek's belief in her never wavered. "I love you," Meredith murmured, leaning in to kiss him.

"I love you too," he smiled as he rolled her on top of him.

Meredith looked to her husband and gave him a small smirk after breaking the kiss. "Remember how we had sex like...twenty times on your birthday? Well, I want that too," she giggled.

"Bed or shower?" Derek asked, easing his fingers under her shirt to rub her back with his fingertips.

"Shower," she replied, rolling off of him. "We can save the bed sex for work. And then more bed and shower when we get home..."

"You're the boss," he chuckled as Meredith took his hand and led him into their attached bathroom.

She kicked the door shut with her foot before eagerly pressing her lips against his. "Yep. I am."

--

When Meredith walked into the residents' lounge to prepare for her shift that morning, she was taken by surprise by the decorations she found there. _Izzie_, she thought to herself. Above her cubby was a birthday banner, as well as balloons attached to her coat hook. "Happy birthday!" Izzie said excitedly.

Meredith smiled at her friends. "Thanks, you guys."

"I baked you a cake, but we can't eat it until lunch," she explained, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. "I did make you a birthday muffin though, which you would have gotten this morning, but you just had to go and move out..." Izzie said jokingly.

"Thanks, Iz," she said graciously, putting the blueberry pastry in her cubby so she could quickly change into her scrubs.

Cristina sat up from her reclined position on the bench and gave her friend a tired smile. "Happy birthday."

"What's wrong with you?" Meredith giggled, slipping on her scrub pants.

"I was on-call while you were home getting laid," Cristina groaned, lying back on the bench once again and putting her arm over her eyes.

"Birthday sex. Nice," Alex grinned as he clipped his ID badge to his pocket.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "Stop."

"I'm just saying...she has that glowy sex look on her face," he shrugged in explanation.

"You do," George agreed, laughing slightly.

Meredith gasped. "I do not."

"Don't be embarrassed. Celebrate it," Alex grinned as the five of them left the room to go find Bailey for their assignments.

When they met her in the hall, their former resident smiled. "Happy Birthday, Dr. ...Shepherd," Bailey said as she wrote on the OR board.

"Mer gets to do a corpus callosotomy? Not fair!" Cristina said with wide eyes as she noticed her friend's name written on the schedule.

Meredith smiled proudly. "My husband loves me..."

"I'm gonna throw up," Cristina groaned. "Dr. Bailey, is McDreamy allowed to do that?"

"Yang, I was kind enough to put you on cardio today. So I suggest you shut your mouth before I have a change of heart and send you to the pit."

Cristina immediately straightened her shoulders and smiled. "Very happy to be working with Dr. Dixon. Thank you," she said quickly.

Bailey chuckled slightly. "That's what I thought. Okay, O'Malley, you're with Hunt. Stevens, you're on OB. Alex, you're with me."

After everyone had dispersed, Meredith made her way to the elevator. Derek told her to meet in their patient's room to go over the procedure before they would scrub in at ten. When she saw him in the hall, she smiled. "Good morning, Dr. Shepherd," Derek grinned, keeping his tone professional.

Meredith couldn't help but giggle. "Good morning."

The two walked into the room and greeted the patient and her family. "Good morning, Lauren. Remember me?" Derek asked.

The little nine year old girl nodded shyly and looked to Meredith curiously.

"And I'm...Dr. Shepherd," Meredith said, also introducing herself.

The girl's father smiled. "Strange coincidence or...?"

"He's my husband, actually," she explained with a nod.

"Really? You don't hear that every day," Lauren's mother laughed slightly.

Derek grinned. "We just got married a few weeks ago. It's still weird for us too."

"Well, congratulations," they said in unison.

"Thank you," Meredith responded, looking to Derek briefly before reading over the little girl's history as well as explaining the surgery to the three of them. "So I'll come back in to prep you in an hour or so, and then at ten, we'll go into surgery," she said with an assuring smile, attempting to lift the scared little girl's spirits.

After the two of them left the room, Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "I'm going to take her blood work down to the lab. So I'll see you later on, okay?"

Derek nodded. "Don't forget to start thinking about dog names...

"I am," she giggled as she began walking down the hall. "And we're getting a puppy."

"Your birthday, your choice," he laughed.

"You're so whipped, man," Mark grinned, overhearing the conversation as he stood at the nurses' station writing in a patient chart.

Derek spun around and faced his friend. "Yeah. I know," he smirked.

"Grey has you wrapped around her little finger," he pointed out as he flipped the chart shut. "That doesn't get annoying?"

"She gives me sex. So, no, not really," Derek laughed.

"Good point."

--

"What's next, Dr. Shepherd?" Derek asked his wife as the two of them stood over their patient's open brain on the OR table.

"After partial separation of the cerebral hemispheres, I have to locate the corpus callosum and separate the fibers from one side of the brain to the other," Meredith explained as she gave full concentration to the patient in front of her.

"Excellent," he replied, watching her closely.

Meredith took the scalpel from the scrub nurse and performed the surgery with the finest precision, just as Derek knew she would. After the surgery was complete, Meredith looked to him; he could see the smile come over her face despite the mask she was wearing. "Wow..." she gasped.

"You did great," Derek grinned. "I knew you could do it."

"Thanks," Meredith breathed, pulling off her gloves and depositing them in the trash can.

As the two began scrubbing off their hands, Derek kissed her forehead. "You deserved it. I'm really proud of you."

"That was..." she started, finding herself at a loss for words as she attempted to describe the feeling.

"Such a high?" Derek offered, smiling slightly as he recalled what she had said to him so long ago.

"Yeah. Exactly," Meredith nodded as she grabbed a paper towel and began drying her hands. She knew this moment would be one she'd never forget. And it was all thanks to her husband.

Derek wrapped his arms around her waist after drying his own hands. "I love you," he said, leaning in to kiss her.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I love you too."

--

"So have you thought of any names yet?" Derek asked as the two of them drove to the animal shelter located close to the hospital. After their shifts, Meredith found Derek and practically dragged him from the building, not that he didn't want to go; he had just never seen her so antsy to do anything before.

Meredith dropped her head against the head rest of her seat. "Nope. You?"

"I think we should see him first," Derek replied, switching lanes so he could get off at the exit.

"Him?" she asked.

Derek shrugged noncommittally. "Or her. It doesn't matter to me."

"What if they're brother and sister and they don't want to be split up?" Meredith asked hypothetically. "Then what?"

"Well then, I guess we'd be getting two dogs," he laughed, knowing there was no way he'd ever win that argument if that were the case.

Meredith smiled sweetly at her husband. "Okay then."

Derek pulled into the parking lot of the shelter and turned off the ignition. "These places are usually pretty sad. Are you sure you don't want to go to the pet store?" he asked.

"No," Meredith said, shaking her head adamantly. "Those animals have a better chance of being adopted. The animals here...no so much," she sighed sadly.

"Okay," Derek nodded. "Ready to go in?"

Meredith looked to her husband and kissed him quickly. "Yep. Let's go."

Once inside, Meredith and Derek were greeted by one of the shelter employees, who said the two were free to look around on their own. Derek tooks Meredith's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before they entered the large, surprisingly friendly looking, room with all of the prospective pets. "A puppy, right?" he asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

"Puppies are on the other side," Derek said, pointing to a sign posted on the wall. The two walked to the right side of the shelter and were immediately greeted with the barks of both large and small dogs.

Meredith walked over the one of the cages and smiled at one of the dogs. "Hello there," she giggled, letting the puppy lick her hand.

"How big do you want the dog to get?" he asked, reading the information tag attached to the cage.

"I don't know. What do you think?" Meredith questioned as she walked over to another cage and began scratching another puppy behind the ears.

Derek shrugged. "Doesn't matter. Nothing yappy, preferably..."

"No poodles?" she asked with a small giggle.

"I'd rather not," he admitted.

Meredith looked to him and smirked. "You want one that'll be able to herd our flock of Shepherds?" she asked jokingly.

"I'm just saying..." he laughed, "...a poodle isn't really good with kids."

"I don't want a poodle. Don't worry," Meredith said with an assuring smile. She stood up and kissed his cheek. "Maybe something medium sized, like Doc was?"

"Sounds good," Derek agreed.

Meredith walked over to a few more cages before noticing a particular one that looked empty. She knelt down and peered inside before gasping. "Oh Derek..."

"What?" he asked curiously, walking over and kneeling down in front of the cage next to his wife.

"Him," she said sweetly. "Derek, look at him."

"He looks scared," Derek pointed out as Meredith stuck a few fingers in the bars in an attempt to get the dog to come closer.

Meredith smiled slightly when the tiny, white and brown lab sniffed her fingers. "He's the one, Derek."

Derek could tell by the look on Meredith's face that this little puppy was the one they'd be going home with. Seeing her happy meant more to him than anything else. If she happened to fall in love with a fluffy poodle, he wouldn't have been able to protest either. "Okay," he whispered, smiling softly.

After unhooking the latch on the cage, Derek opened the door and Meredith reached inside, frowning slightly when the puppy backed away from her. "Hey, little guy. It's okay," she said quietly so she wouldn't scare him. The dog slowly inched his way toward her, and Meredith picked him up. "Hi," she said, holding him close to her.

"Hey there," Derek smiled, scratching the puppy behind the ear. "Want to come home with us?"

The dog looked to Derek curiously. "I think that's a yes," Meredith giggled.

The three of them walked to the front desk to fill out the paperwork, but Meredith paid no attention. As Derek signed form after form, she just continued petting the dog's soft fur and cuddling it close against her chest. When they finally left, Derek looked to his wife and smiled. "We need to go to the pet store and pick up a few things for him."

"Okay," Meredith nodded, paying half-hearted attention as she got into the car and buckled her seat belt. "We're going to go get some toys for you," she explained to the puppy, who was looking around the car.

"Why do I have a feeling I'm not getting sex tonight?" Derek smirked.

Meredith laughed. "It's my birthday and you promised me. So there will be sex," she said definitively.

"Okay then," he nodded with a grin. "Do you want to stop off and get take-out somewhere...maybe the Italian place you like? Then we could go home and you could open your gifts?" he suggested.

"Love to," she said happily as the puppy licked her chin.

When he stopped at a red light, Derek looked over to his wife and smiled. Knowing Meredith was happy was the greatest feeling. He knew her birthdays in the past probably weren't nearly as pleasant, most likely consisting of a day spent with the nanny, and when she got older, a bottle of tequila. So making sure this day was perfect for her was his goal. And so far, it was.

--

They arrived home an hour or so later after stopping at the pet store and the small restaurant to pick up dinner. The smile hadn't left Meredith's face the whole time. She and Derek were seated at the kitchen table eating while the new puppy sat perched on her lap. Since leaving the shelter, the new three month old puppy had warmed up to his new owners somewhat, and didn't seem so afraid anymore. Meredith bit into a meatball and looked to Derek. "He needs a name," she pointed out as she chewed.

Derek smiled. "Yeah, he does."

"Nothing too cutesy," Meredith said, shaking her head.

"How about..." Derek thought for a moment. "Petey?"

Meredith looked to her husband with an apathetic expression. "Petey? Seriously?" she asked, incredulous.

"What's wrong with Petey?" he asked as he twirled some spaghetti on his fork.

Meredith handed the dog a small biscuit. "Petey is the name of the guy that shot up that restaurant...and Burke," she reminded him.

Derek frowned. "Oh right. Well, what does he look like then?"

"Hmm...Sammy?" Meredith suggested.

Derek shook his head and laughed, causing a frown from Meredith. "What's wrong with Sammy?" she asked.

"Nancy's daughter's name is Samantha. We all call her Sammy. Not gonna work," he chuckled, taking a sip of his drink. "How about...Toby?"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "That's even worse than Petey," she scoffed.

"I like Toby," Derek argued. "It's a cute name for a dog."

"Okay, a little F.Y.I...when if comes to naming our kids, you have no say," Meredith said.

Derek laughed, unsure of whether or not she was serious. "Fine. Not Toby..."

Meredith picked up the dog and studied his little brown and white face for a few moments, biting her lip in contemplation. "How about Charlie?" she said eventually.

He thought it over for a minute or two before nodding slowly. "Charlie...I kind of like that, actually."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked, slightly surprised.

"Yeah. Charlie Shepherd sounds like a good name to me," Derek grinned.

Meredith nodded and kissed the top of the puppy's head. "Charlie it is," she concluded. "Welcome to the family, little guy."

--

"You got me a new watch!" Meredith exclaimed, removing the remainder of wrapping paper from the small gift box and dropping it on the living room floor. "I wanted one..."

"Which is why I got one for you," Derek said with a smile as he leaned in to kiss her. Meredith finally gave up possession of the dog for a while so she could open her gifts, and Charlie was content lying on Derek's lap as the two sat next to her.

Meredith squeezed his hand gently. "Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome," he replied, kissing her temple.

By the time all of her presents were unwrapped, she accumulated a pile of things she either wanted or needed, and Derek knew she was thankful. There was a new watch, a new pair of Converse sneakers that she actually picked out for herself, and let him wrap for her. Derek offered to go the store himself, but she insisted that she needed to try them on first to make sure they were a good fit. He got her new pajama pants, a new memo board for her cubby, even her own pillow for when she slept in the on-call room, something she'd been talking about getting since he practically met her--nothing glamorous, just things that she wanted but mean a lot to her, especially coming from her husband. Of course, Derek stopped off at Victoria's Secret to get her come lingerie, more so for his benefit than hers.

When Meredith pulled the almost see-through nightie from the pink bag, she swatted Derek playfully on the arm. "Derek," she giggled, unable to hide her smile despite her best angry face.

"What?" Derek chuckled. "No one is going to see you in that except me...and maybe the dog. One of the benefits of having our own house."

"Hmm...true," Meredith sighed. "If you're lucky, I may even wear it tonight."

Derek grinned as he leaned in to kiss her again. "Can't wait."

"Thank you, Derek," she said sincerely. "I love everything."

"There's one more thing," Derek said, kissing her cheek before hopping up off the floor. "I'll be right back."

Meredith wondered what else her husband may have gotten for her, and when he came back into the room with a large square present, her curiously peaked even more. "What is that?"

Derek laughed, setting the gift in front of her. "You just have to open it..."

Meredith raised up to her knees and slowly peeled back the wrapping paper, gasping in awe when she figured out what it was. "How did you...is this from the honeymoon?"

"Yeah," Derek said softly. "Remember the day we went to the little market for souvenirs and stuff? Well, when you were talking to one of the shop owners about cheese or something, I spotted this Italian guy--college kid, I think--drawing the scene in front of him...the market and the flowers and stuff. We got to talking and he said that sometimes, people asked him to sketch things for them, so I asked him if there was a way he could draw the Bridge of Sighs and a gondola or something. When he said he would, I knew it was something you'd like, so I paid him to do it."

"You did that for me?" Meredith asked, slightly tearful as she looked to her husband.

Derek chuckled a little. "He dropped it off at the hotel, and I gave the manager directions on where to send it. He shippped it back to your house, and I called Izzie to tell her to keep it hidden so you wouldn't see it."

"Der..." she smiled. "I...oh my God."

"You like it?"

Meredith wiped a tear away and nodded. "I love it. Thank you."

"You're welcome," he whispered, pulling her onto his lap. "I love you, too."

"Can we hang it above the fireplace?" she asked, thinking how nice it would look in that spot, one of the many treasures that would become Shepherd family heirlooms.

Derek smiled. "Absolutely."

"You're getting so lucky tonight," Meredith giggled as she ran her fingers through his hair.

"Looking forward to it..." he said with a grin.

"But first we need to give Charlie a bath," she pointed out, scooping the dog off Derek's lap and holding him close to her chest. "He deserves to be all fresh and clean. Don't you, buddy?" she giggled.

"Fine," Derek conceded. "But then...it's you...and me...naked...for birthday sex..." he said between kisses.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I think I like this birthday thing."

--

"Where's he going to sleep?" Meredith asked.

The two had bathed him in the tub just as Meredith had wanted to, and now the only thing on Derek's mind was his wife, and finding a way for her to come to bed. But somehow, he knew doing so would be difficult, considering she had already fallen in love with the puppy. "I was thinking...maybe we could put is bed in the hallway on the window seat at least for tonight while you and I...do birthday things. It's cozy, and close enough to our room so he won't get scared," he reasoned.

"Okay," she whispered, kissing the top of Charlie's head. "I just want to let him outback first to pee."

Derek nodded. "Okay. I'll be here...naked...and waiting."

Meredith smiled at her cheesy husband before kissing him quickly. "You do that. I'll be back in a few minutes."

While Meredith was outback with Charlie, Derek hastily removed his clothes and pulled back the covers on the bed. Just to add to the fun, he stopped off after work yesterday for some glow-in-the-dark condoms, knowing they'd make her happy. They hadn't used them since Valentine's Day, and he figured her birthday would be a good time to revive them. He opened the drawer in the nightstand and pulled out a few. Dropping down onto the bed, Derek made himself comfortable while waiting for his wife to return.

Meredith came back into the room several minutes later, giggling when she saw him lying on the bed naked. "Keeping your promise?" she asked flirtatiously, walking over to the bed and straddling him.

"Yep," Derek murmured as he began sucking on her neck before trailing his tongue up behind her ear--a trick he learned some time ago. "Is the dog okay?"

"He's in the hall in his bed," she replied, losing all coherent thought as he flipped her onto her back in one swift movement. "Derek..." she giggled.

He reached for the hem of her shirt and began pulling it over her head. "What?" he asked with a chuckle.

"What about my nightie?" she asked half-heartedly. At this point, she was more than willing to surrender herself to him, nightie or not.

Derek paused momentarily and smirked at her. "Want me to go downstairs and get it?"

"No," Meredith said definitively, pulling him down on top of her again. "There's always tomorrow..."

"Good point," he agreed, finally succeeding in removing her shirt. "Now...pants off." Derek moved down to the bottom of the bed and pulled off her jeans and panties at the same time, leaving her in her bra.

Rather than waste any more time, Meredith arched her back and unhooked it herself. She tossed it on the floor and dropped her head back onto the pillows, waiting for him to lavish her body with attention. Just as he dropped his head to kiss her breasts, their foreplay was interrupted by a scratching at the door. "What the hell?" Derek groaned, glancing briefly at the door before returning his gaze to Meredith's body.

"Derek..." she whined. "He wants to come in."

Derek sighed and reluctantly rolled off of her. "Can you...? I would, but I'm kind of..." He gestured to his already prominent erection.

"I'll be quick," Meredith nodded, kissing him quickly. She hopped off the bed and pulled on her robe, hoping that Charlie just needed a few moments of attention so she could return to Derek. When they decided getting a dog would be a good idea, Meredith never took into consideration the fact that having a new puppy in the house could very well interrupt pending sex.

"Hey Charlie. You okay, hun?" she asked after she walked into the hall. Meredith knelt down next to the dog and kissed the top of his head. "Feel free to wander around the house--just don't tear anything up. Those couches are brand new. And don't eat laundry," Meredith said, thinking back to when Doc wreaked havoc on an entire basket of clothes.

Charlie picked up the hot dog chew toy they bought for him and handed it to Meredith. "You want to play, huh?" she asked, tossing the stuffed toy in the air. "Well, Mommy and Daddy were trying to play too..."

"Mer," Derek called from the bedroom.

"Wait a sec," she called back. "Okay you...play with your toys. I'll be back later, I promise." Meredith rose back to her feet, walking back into their bedroom and closing the door.

"Is he okay," Derek asked.

Meredith dropped her robe on the floor. "He's fine," she assured him. She crawled back onto the bed and straddled him once again.

"Hmm...good," he groaned, cupping her breasts as she rolled her hips. "I bought the glow-in-the-dark ones..."

"You did?" Meredith asked with a giggle. "I've missed those."

"I figured he could get dressed up for your birthday..." Derek grinned, the naughty glint in his eye catching Meredith's.

Meredith gasped. "Derek Shepherd...that was dirty," she scolded, but continued smiling.

Derek reached over to the nightstand and grabbed one off the top of it. "I know," he smirked, handing one of the condoms to her so she could roll it on.

She removed the wrapper and expertly rolled it onto him, giggling as he groaned in appreciation. "I haven't even done anything yet..."

Unwilling and unable to stall any longer, Meredith positioned herself above him, bracing her hands on his chest as she sunk down. "Oh," she gasped. "Derek..."

"Happy birthday," Derek growled, grasping her hips as she moved above him. Just as Meredith started rolling her hips, the dog started scratching on the door again. "Ignore it," he breathed.

Meredith bit her lip and nodded; the feeling of making love to Derek far too great to focus on anything else. "Oh Derek..." she moaned, leaning down to kiss him. "Love you."

"I love you, too." He gently grabbed her thighs and flipped their positions once again so he was on top. When it came to sex, they had it down to a science. Both of them knew what to do to each other and when. Meredith moaned when Derek began picking up the pace, forgetting all about the dog in the hallway. She loved her puppy, but stopping the sex wasn't a possibility right now, not when Meredith could barely form a coherent thought.

"Mer," he panted, kissing her hungrily. He could tell by her whimpers and moans that she was close. Derek took one of her breasts into his mouth, knowing that any stimulation of the sensitive skin would push her over the edge.

Meredith clung to his shoulders and threw her head back in pleasure, letting her orgasm wash over her. He, too, let himself go, feeling himself release inside of her. After a few moments when both came down from their highs, Meredith ran her fingers down his back, tickling a trail down his spine with her fingertips. "Hmm..." she sighed. "Happy birthday to me...."

Derek chuckled softly and kissed her forehead. The moments of peaceful quiet after sex were something they both loved. It was simple and relaxing, and gave them both a chance to come down from their post-sex fog. "I love you so much," Derek whispered as he slowly withdrew.

Meredith giggled as she noticed how the condom glowed a bright green color. "I swear, that stuff better be safe. I'd hate to think I'm going to have residual glowing down there...like peeing bright green or something," she mused.

"I think it's safe, don't worry," Derek chuckled, tossing the condom in the trash.

As he went to lie back down next to her, Meredith stopped him. "Can we let Charlie cuddle?" she asked sweetly.

Derek laughed, kissing her forehead. "Are we done with sex for the night?" he asked. "I believed I promised you a marathon."

Meredith giggled as he pulled on a pair of boxers. "No we're not done. But while I catch my breath and give you a chance to...power up, we can let him in," she explained.

"We can keep his dog bed in here. I don't mind," Derek shrugged. He opened the bedroom door and Charlie immediately ran in. Meredith laughed when he hopped up on their bed and made himself comfortable.

"Charlie," she giggled, scooping the puppy up into her arms before addressing her attention to her husband. "You mean you don't mind if he's in here while we have sex?"

"Well, maybe not during sex. That might be weird..." he agreed, lying back in bed.

Meredith put Charlie in between them and laid down. "Thank you, Derek," she said softly, watching as the dog spun in circles in an attempt to get comfy.

"For what?" he asked.

"Making my birthday nice. I can't even remember the last time I had a good birthday, let alone a great one. And I just...I appreciate it," she shrugged, kissing him.

"You made my birthday nice too--better even. Sorry I couldn't take you to wine country..." he sighed jokingly. "Maybe next year..."

"Stupid jobs always getting in the way," Meredith giggled, scrunching her nose.

"We could quit..." he mused.

Meredith just rolled her eyes and laughed. "Oh sure..."

"We'd go crazy," Derek laughed, reaching over to tickle her arm with his fingertips.

"Yes we would," she giggled in agreement. Meredith looked to the puppy for a minute then to Derek. "Could we get him a doggy door? Maybe one that flaps or whatever so he can go in and out on his own. I don't want him being trapped in the house all day, especially when we have to stay late. It would suck if he had an accident or something. And this way he can run around. It's safe here, and we have the fence in the back," she rambled adorably.

Derek smiled at his wife, his eyes so full of adoration for her. "Sure. We can do that."

"I love him, Derek," Meredith said softly as she rubbed Charlie's fur. "Which is weird because we've only had him for a few hours, but I do...love him."

"Me too," he nodded.

Meredith giggled. "Maybe he'll help me with the nesting thing so I don't jump you for a baby for a while..." she joked, inching herself closer to the two of them.

"He's good practice," Derek pointed out. "If we can take care of him, maybe we'll be okay at taking care of a baby, too."

"He's our baby for now," she agreed, leaning over the dog to kiss him.

The sight of Meredith's still naked body made Derek's breathing quicken and he smiled against her lips. "Meet you in the shower?" he murmured.

"Shower?" she asked curiously, careful not to disrupt the sleeping dog as she rolled on top of Derek.

"I don't think Charlie is planning on moving any time soon," he said. "So if we can sneak off for some shower sex, I think we could get away with it..."

"Bendy thing?" Meredith asked, knowing there was no way he'd say no to that.

Derek grabbed a few condoms off the nightstand and handed them to her. "It wouldn't be a birthday without the bendy thing," he smirked.

"Excellent point," Meredith said enthusiastically, rolling off her husband and making her way into the attached bathroom. When Derek snuck up behind her moments later, she let out a laugh that made Derek smile. Nothing was greater than hearing Meredith's laughter.

As the two flipped on the water and stepped into the large shower to continue with the birthday recreation, both knew that this was true happiness. They had the house, the marriage, the dog...things were as close to perfect as they could be. And that was certainly something worth celebrating.

**Reviews make my day. :)**

**Also, for anyone interested, I wrote a MerDer one shot, "They Bring Me to You." It's post-crossover, and hopefully decent MerDer Valentine's fluff. **

**Happy Valentine's Day!**


	46. Nine Nieces, Six Nephews

**Disclaimer: It belongs to Shonda, not me.**

**Thanks for the reviews, I really appreciate them! This chapter jumps ahead a month or so. :)**

"Okay little guy, Mommy and Daddy will be home after work. Just take it easy," Meredith whispered to their puppy. Charlie had recently been neutered and Meredith and Derek were making sure to keep him comfy.

Derek knelt down next to his wife and kissed her cheek. "He'll be fine, Mer," he assured her. "Won't you, buddy?" Derek scratched the dog behind the ears as he lay in his dog bed, looking up at them and yawning.

"I feel bad leaving him here," Meredith frowned, kissing the top of Charlie's head. Over the past month, both of them had become attached to their puppy. Every time Meredith referred to him as her baby, he couldn't help but smile. He always knew she had maternal instincts, but since getting Charlie, they had only grown stronger.

"He has his toys and his food, and the doggy door so he can let himself in and out. I promise, he'll be fine," Derek said with a smile.

Meredith kissed the puppy one more time. "We love you, Charlie. And we'll be home soon," she said softly before standing up.

Derek handed his wife her cup of coffee and kissed her. "Ready?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "Let's go."

--

As Meredith was changing the radio station on the way to work, Derek's cell phone went off in his pocket. Rather than answer the call while driving, Meredith took the phone and looked at the ID screen. "It's Nancy."

"Nancy?" Derek asked confusedly. "Pick it up."

Meredith groaned before flipping open the phone. Nancy wasn't exactly her biggest fan, and she really didn't feel like speaking to the woman who called her a slutty intern. "Hello?" she asked meekly.

There was silence on the other end for a moment before Nancy began speaking. "Who is this? Oh, Meredith?"

"Yeah," Meredith replied. "I um...Derek's driving so I answered. Do you want me to put him on or...?"

"No, that's alright. I'll just tell you. Our sister, Amy, went into labor about an hour ago with her first. I just figured I'd let you know. Tell Derek to keep his phone close by today so we can keep you updated, okay?" Nancy asked.

Meredith smiled, knowing how excited Derek would be when she told him. "Yeah, I will. Thanks for calling and letting us know."

After the two said the briefest of goodbyes, Meredith hung up the phone and handed it back to her husband. "She said Amy just went into labor," Meredith said with a smile.

"She is?" Derek asked, the surprise evident in his voice. "Oh my God..." he whispered. "My baby sister."

They pulled into the hospital parking lot and while Derek was pulling into a parking space, Meredith leaned over the console and kissed his cheek. "Yeah," she whispered. She didn't know what is was like to get news like that, but just the look on Derek's face told her he was beyond thrilled. "She said to keep your phone nearby so they can call you during the day."

"Amy's the baby of the family," Derek grinned, removing the keys from the ignition. "The rest of us were born two or three years apart, but Amy was born six years after Liz. I was eight when she was born. I wanted the last kid to be a boy, so when I found out I had _another_ sister, I wasn't all that happy. We were always close though--probably because I always got stuck watching her while my sisters were too busy on dates and stuff," he chuckled.

"But you were the band geek stuck at home watching your baby sister," Meredith said with a small smile.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, pretty much. Mark would come over sometimes to help. That was fun."

"Congratulation, Derek. I mean, you already have fourteen nieces and nephews so you're probably used to this sort of thing, but still, I'm happy for you," she said sincerely, squeezing his hand.

"You too," he grinned. "All of them are your nieces and nephews now, too. And this is _our_ godchild that's being born today."

"Our godchild," Meredith whispered, taking a moment to process. "Never thought I'd ever have one of those."

While still in the privacy of their car, Derek leaned in and kissed her softly. "I love you."

Meredith smiled. "I love you, too."

--

"Kristen O'Leary, three days old, born with a tumor on her abdominal region, which was then biopsied and found to be benign. This morning, surgery is scheduled to remove the mass," Meredith explained during rounds.

"Where's the mother?" Alex murmured, looking around the NICU.

Meredith smiled slightly when the newborn in the isolette grabbed onto her finger. "Recovering from the C-section after nearly slipping into a coma. And there isn't a father," she said sadly.

"Sucks," Alex said, letting out a breath.

"Yeah," Meredith agreed.

Bailey closed the chart and handed it to Alex. "Shepherd, Karev, you two are on this. Run the pre-op tests and meet me in the OR at ten," she instructed.

After Bailey and their fellow residents exited the NICU, the two began running the pre-op labs on the infant. "So how's married life?" Alex asked with a grin.

Meredith giggled. "Pretty damn good. So are you popping the question any time soon?" she asked while taking the baby's temperature.

"I'm trying. I've been trying almost every day for a month. But every time I do, something always comes up," Alex sighed before laughing a little. "I was practically down on my damn knee last night when Iz got an emergency page."

"Hmm," Meredith murmured in sympathy. "You'll find the right time, Alex. And when you do, she'll be thrilled."

Alex looked at his friend and smirked. "Since when do you do the happy thing?" he asked jokingly.

"I'm married to Mr. Sentimental. It was bound to happen," she shrugged.

Derek popped his head into the NICU and smiled when he saw Meredith. "Two centimeters," he grinned, giving her a thumbs up.

Meredith smiled widely. "Good!" she exclaimed. "Keep me updated."

Alex furrowed his brow. "What was that?"

"Oh, Derek's sister is in labor with our godchild," she laughed.

"Who? The mean one who insulted you?" he asked, letting the baby hold onto his finger as he listened to her heartbeat.

Meredith smirked. "No, not her. His youngest sister, Amy," she informed him.

"Youngest? How many of them are there?"

"Five kids. Four of which are girls," she giggled.

"Five?"

Meredith took down some notes in the chart. "Fifteen nieces and nephews."

"So I guess you two will be adding your dozen to the family tree?" he asked with a grin.

"Not a dozen," she corrected. "No way...we'll add our two and call it a day."

"Two? That's all? Dude, come on..."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Three is the limit--and that's assuming we survive two."

"You will," he said simply. "I'm the oldest of three. My mom raised all of us practically by herself. If she can do it, you two can do it."

"Thank you, Alex," Meredith said with a soft smile. She and Derek weren't having kids for a while yet, but Alex's vote of confidence in her really did make her feel like maybe they could actually do it one day. One day, they'd be making the call to the rest of the family announcing news of their own.

--

"Mark!" Derek called when he saw his friend heading down the hall. When he got no response, he yelled his name again. "Mark!"

Mark spun on his heel. "Hey."

Derek caught up to him and the two headed into the elevator. "Amy's in labor."

"The baby's having her baby?" Mark asked with a grin. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah. She's two centimeters as of an hour ago. My sisters take turns calling," Derek laughed.

Mark leaned against the side of the elevator wall and sighed. "I wish we were there."

"Yeah, me too," Derek agreed. "Mom is probably a mess."

"Probably," Mark laughed. "I'm surprised she isn't sending you pictures of Amy in the hospital bed."

"I'm waiting for those," he joked. "You're coming to the baptism next month, right?"

Mark shrugged. "I guess. I'm invited, right?"

Derek nodded. Even after everything that had happened, Mark was still a member of the Shepherd family, and always would be. "Yeah. Mer and I are flying out. You could come with us."

"Are you bringing the puppy with you? Or is Grey gonna be able to handle a few days without her pride and joy?" Mark asked teasingly.

The two men stepped out of the elevator and began walking toward the coffee cart just outside the entrance to the hospital. "I haven't brought that up yet," he laughed. "I'm hoping she'll let Stevens and Karev babysit. She's attached to him. It's cute though."

"Probably not so cute when you want sex," Mark pointed out as they reached the small stand. He winked at the short blonde cashier in an obvious attempt at flirting. Derek made it a point for both of them to order and pay quickly, and go straight back inside. It was bad enough he slept with every nurse at Seattle Grace. Sleeping with the coffee cart lady was plain unacceptable.

"Not so cute then, no," Derek agreed. "We've been creative lately, so it all works out."

Mark eyed his friend curiously. "Creative?"

"Charlie prefers our bed to his own," Derek sighed.

"That dog sounds like quite the cock block," Mark said, sucking in a breath after taking a sip of the hot beverage.

Derek laughed. "Please don't call him that in front of Mer..."

"It's the truth."

"He just got neutered. Give him a break," Derek said as they stepped back onto the elevator to head back upstairs to the surgical floor.

Mark winced. "Ooh. Ouch."

"I think he's fine. Mer rocks him like a baby and cuddles him. It's actually pretty entertaining," Derek chuckled.

The two men stepped off the elevator and Mark smirked. "Does she bottle feed the thing too?"

Derek laughed. "Stop mocking my wife," he said jokingly as his pager went off.

Mark grinned as Derek began walking toward the emergency patient's room. "I wasn't!"

--

"Okay, Karev, what's our main concern here?" Bailey asked as the three of them stood over the operating table in the OR.

"Excessive bleeding," Alex answered.

Bailey nodded. "And why is that, Grey--Shepherd?" she corrected herself.

"Because of her size, too much blood loss, even if we have enough supply, could be fatal," Meredith replied.

"Right. So how do we minimize that risk?" she asked them.

Alex cleared his throat. "We resect the tumor slowly, piece by piece, to avoid hemorrhaging."

"Good," Bailey said. "So which one of you wants to cut?"

The two looked to their former resident confusedly. "What?" Meredith asked.

"You're third year residents. _My_ babies. If you can't do this, then I've done my job very wrong," she informed them. "Now, who wants to start?"

Alex looked to Meredith and nodded. "You can if you want."

"No," Meredith shook her head. "You do it. I'll get my turn," she said graciously.

She could see her friend's grin behind his mask. "Thanks."

Meredith simply nodded, holding the abdominal tumor in place while Alex made the primary incision. She already got to do a corpus callosotomy thanks to her husband. To take this opportunity too wouldn't be fair, especially because Alex wasn't married to a fancy, important neurosurgeon.

During the surgery, one of the nurses entered the room holding a mask over her face. "Dr. Bailey, Miss O'Leary, the baby's mother, started seizing a few minutes ago. Dr. Shepherd just started working on her in OR two."

"Do they know what's wrong with her?" Bailey asked, turning away from the table momentarily.

"They noticed a small bleed on an earlier CT scan, but it should have resolved itself. Dr. Shepherd seems to think it ruptured, so he's going to go in and attempt to fix it," the nurse informed them.

Bailey nodded. "Okay, well, keep me posted." After the nurse left the OR, Bailey sighed. "Poor thing. Her mother's having brain surgery, and there's no father to begin with."

"I'll stay with the baby. I mean, afterward. She shouldn't be alone," Meredith offered.

"That husband of yours is a miracle worker. I hope she's able to pull through," Bailey breathed.

Meredith smiled slightly. "Yeah, me too."

--

After the young newborn's surgery, Meredith was taking the baby to the NICU where she could be monitored closely. On her way to the elevator, Cristina stopped her. "Hey, Mer."

Meredith held the door open so her friend could enter. "Hey. What's wrong?"

"Oh, is this the kid? Derek just finished the surgery on the mother. He's on his way to CT to make sure everything is clear. Oh, and he wanted me to tell you that...Kathleen called. And Amy is six centimeters," Cristina said, reading off a small piece of paper she had scribbled the information on. "What the hell does that mean?"

Meredith giggled. "Derek's sister is in labor."

"And his family is calling with updates on her cervical changes? You married into one close-knit family, Mer," Cristina joked, patting Meredith on the shoulder.

"I think it's sweet how much they all care about each other," Meredith shrugged.

The elevator doors opened and Cristina held them open so Meredith could exit with the isolette to take back to the NICU. "One person's sweet is another person's creepy."

"Yeah yeah," Meredith sighed.

"McDreamy said he'd meet you up here when he's done," Cristina called out as the doors shut.

Meredith shook her head and laughed. Leave it to Cristina to mock a happy family. She wheeled the baby down the hall and stopped momentarily to grab a yellow gown off the shelf. After slipping it on, Meredith gave her finger back to the baby who had been holding onto it since leaving the OR. "You okay, sweet pea?"

The small baby whimpered slightly as Meredith checked the sutures to make sure none had popped open. "I'm going to need my hand to take down some stats. But then I'll give it right back, okay?" she whispered, gently pulling her index finger from the baby's tight grip.

She flipped open the chart and began recording the baby's vitals when the sound of footsteps interrupted her. "Hey," Derek said softly, coming up next to her.

"Oh. Hey," Meredith replied, smiling slightly. "How's the mom?"

"She should be fine. I have one of Yang's interns getting a CT now, but I think everything is good," Derek nodded. "How's she doing?"

"She pulled through surgery like a pro. She's getting fussy though. The anesthesia's wearing off and I think she's hungry," Meredith replied, putting the chart down on the table.

Derek nodded, rubbing the baby's leg with his finger. "Well, we should probably feed her then."

"Usually this is something the mother should do," Meredith pointed out sadly, watching as Derek seemed to calm the baby down with his touch.

He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "She will eventually. But for right now, this little girl is hungry. Aren't you, Kristen?"

"Okay, I'll get her set up. The IVs and monitors have to stay hooked up to her. Could you go ask one of the nurses? They have the special formula or whatever," Meredith said, lifting open the side of the isolette to pick up the baby.

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "I'll be right back." When he returned with the small bottle a few minutes later, he walked back into the NICU to find Meredith sitting in a rocking chair close by with the baby in her arms. "Here you go," he said, handing it to her.

Meredith smiled, adjusting the baby so she could eat more comfortably. "Ready to eat, Kristen?" she whispered, smiling when the baby began drinking from the bottle without fussing.

Derek fixed the girl's sock and looked to his wife. "Did you hear about Amy?" he asked with a grin.

"Six centimeters. She's almost there," Meredith smiled. "Think she'll deliver today?"

"It's only 11:30 in the morning in New York . I think so," he nodded. "I'm surprised she's progressing this quickly. Most of my sisters are usually in labor for days. Nancy was in labor for fifty hours with her first..."

Meredith cringed. "Damn. That makes me glad I don't have Shepherd genes."

"Me too," he smirked. "Otherwise, I think it'd be illegal for us to be married," Derek pointed out, wiping the baby's chin with a cloth.

She rolled her eyes playfully. "Shut up."

The sound of Derek's cell phone interrupted them, and Derek quickly pulled it from his pocket. "I'll be back," he said, exiting the nursery so he wouldn't disturb the sleeping babies.

Meredith rested her head on the back of the rocking chair, wondering about her little guy at home. Sometimes, she just wanted to bring him into work. It pained her to have to leave him at home by himself for such long hours, but she knew there was little she could do about it. And days like this, when she was surrounded by babies, there was nothing more she wanted to do than pick him up and cuddle him. He had become like a child to both of them.

As Meredith sat there gently rocking, she thought about what they would do with Charlie when she and Derek went to New York for a few days. Leaving him at a kennel was out of the question. She figured she could probably get Alex and Izzie to babysit. Izzie liked stuff like that. Meredith was pulled from her thoughts when Derek walked back into the NICU, a grin on his face. "Eight now."

"Wow," Meredith said, slightly shocked. "Lucky her."

Derek laughed. "I'm sure Nancy is calling her a bitch behind her back."

"Probably," Meredith giggled.

"So how's your day been?" Derek asked.

Meredith pulled the empty bottle from the newborn's mouth. "Pretty good. Bailey let us do surgery practically by ourselves," she grinned. "Here. Want to burp her?"

Derek smiled. "Sure," he replied, taking the baby from Meredith. "By yourselves?"

"Uh huh," she yawned. "Oh, watch her sutures. We can't irritate them."

"I know," Derek chuckled. He walked back over to the isolette and gently laid the baby down so she was facing away from him. "I learned this trick a while ago," he said with a smile as he began rubbing the baby's back. Meredith looked to her husband curiously.

"I did gyny rotation too," he smirked. "And I was married to a neonatal surgeon for eleven years. You learn things..."

"Guess so," she agreed. "You have no idea how much I want to sneak out of here early and go home," Meredith sighed, pulling over a chair and resting her head on his shoulder.

Derek kissed her forehead. "You feel okay?"

Meredith closed her eyes and nodded. "Yeah. I'm just worried about Charlie."

"I'm sure he's fine, Mer. Probably sleeping on our bed," he said jokingly.

"Probably is," Meredith giggled. "So when we go visit your family, I guess he can stay with Alex and Iz," she suggested, letting the baby grab hold of her finger once again.

"Sounds good," Derek nodded. "Would you mind if Mark went with us?"

"Like flew there with us? No, I don't care. As long as we don't have to share a room with him," she teased.

Derek smirked. "We're staying in my old room, you know."

"Aah, the room you took all those girls home to?" Meredith giggled, pulling a pen from the pocket of his lab coat to record the baby's stats again.

"I never brought a girl to my room. I lost my virginity in med school, remember?" Derek asked with a laugh. "You'll be the only one."

Meredith cocked her head slightly and studied her husband's face for a moment. "You miss them, don't you? Being home...your family."

Derek shrugged. "Sometimes. Usually, I don't. But days like today...I miss them. Having you helps though," he said with a soft smile.

"I love you," Meredith whispered, kissing his cheek as she replaced the pen back in his pocket.

Derek grinned. "I love you, too."

--

"We're home, Charlie!" Meredith called out to their puppy as they walked in the front door. Their shift seemed to drag on forever, but they finally made it back home. All Meredith wanted to do was lie on the couch with her family.

She pulled her shoes off, smiling when Charlie scurried into the living room to greet the two of them. "Hey you!" said happily. "How's Mommy's little boy?" she asked, scooping the brown and white puppy into her arms and kissing the top of his head.

"Hey Charlie," Derek smiled, petting the dog. "What did you do today, little guy?" he asked as the three made their way into the kitchen.

Upon entering, Meredith gasped slightly when she saw a piece of shredded paper on the floor. "What did you do, huh?" she asked, gently placing the dog on the floor. She picked up the paper, unable to do anything but sigh when she saw what it was. "He ripped apart the gift certificate we had hanging on the fridge."

"The Ikea one?" he asked, accepting the shredded gift certificate. "Charlie, how'd you reach the fridge?"

"Maybe it fell," Meredith shrugged. "You chewed apart a hundred bucks worth of home furnishings, Charlie. That's bad. We don't eat gift certificates," she gently scolded.

Derek threw the small piece of paper in the trash. "Real tough, Mer," he chuckled.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "He's little. He doesn't know any better," she said. "Charlie, from now on, you eat your food in your doggy bowl. Paper isn't food."

"At least he didn't chew up the furniture," Derek rationalized, running his hand through his hair.

"That you know of. We haven't inspected the damage upstairs yet," she giggled, unable to get angry at her puppy.

Derek groaned. "Maybe we should get a baby gate or something."

"We can't," she argued. "He loves our bed. Don't you?" Meredith asked softly, picking the puppy up again.

"We can't even discipline a dog. Our kids are going to get away with murder," he chuckled.

"Derek, look at the face," she pouted, holding Charlie in front of him. "You can't be mad at him."

Derek laughed. "I'm not mad at him...but I am hungry..." he said, kissing her. "...and horny."

Meredith smiled coyly at him. "Well, if you do the cooking thing for me, I'll do the sex thing for you."

He grinned, pulling her in for a hug with the dog in between them. "Marriage is fun."

Meredith giggled. "I like it so far."

While Derek was cutting vegetables, Meredith was busy folding a load of laundry at the kitchen table. She smiled slightly at how normal this was. In many ways, Meredith still clueless about this whole marriage thing, but was a good kind of clueless. Not every day was glamorous, but she didn't want that anyway. All she wanted was Derek, and of course Charlie. They were her family, and she loved them.

Derek's cell phone rang once again, as it had been doing all day. Derek looked to Meredith and smiled, knowing that this was the call they had been expecting. He wiped off his hands on a dish towel and flipped open his phone. "Hey Nance." As Derek received the details, a smile covered his face, and Meredith swore she saw tears in his eyes. "How much?" he asked before pausing. "How's Amy?"

Several minutes later, Derek said his goodbyes and ended the call with his sister. "She had him a few minutes ago," he grinned.

Meredith dropped the shirt she was in the process of folding, quickly pulling him into an embrace after she walked over to the counter. "Congratulations," she whispered, kissing his cheek. "What's his name?"

"Kyle Thomas...Thomas after his dad," he replied, wiping a tear off his cheek. "He weighed six pounds, two ounces. Tiny, but Nance said he's a screamer," Derek chuckled.

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair. "I'm so happy for you," she smiled, kissing him softly.

"Nancy said they're gonna e-mail some pictures over soon. I can't wait to see him," he breathed.

"How's Amy?" Meredith asked.

Derek nodded. "They said she's good. Tired, but thrilled," he replied, running his fingers down her spine.

Meredith kissed him again quickly. "Why don't you go call Mark and I'll finish up here?" she offered.

"Okay, yeah, thanks," he said with a smile as they pulled apart their embrace. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

As Meredith stood at the counter, tossing a piece of carrot to Charlie who was sitting by her feet, she couldn't tear the smile off her face. She loved seeing Derek happy, and knew that one day, the look on his face when they had their own baby would be even greater.

**To pick things up a bit, I'm skipping ahead a month in the next chapter when they visit the Shepherd family. Mer hasn't met any of them yet except for Derek's mom and Nancy, so I think there's a lot I can do with their NY trip in the chapters to come. **

**Reviews make my day. :)**


	47. Going to New York

**Disclaimer: I accidentally deleted this chapter from my documents, and got really mad at myself for not paying attention to what I was doing. If I own the show, these scenes would be on film so I wouldn't have to worry about making stupid mistakes like that. ;\**

**There's a lot of names in this chapter, but you don't really need to pay that much attention to them. I just added them to give Meredith a sense of the size of Derek's family.**

**This picks up a month later. Enjoy!**

The chill of October was in the air, and Meredith could feel it, even in the warmth of her bed. She rolled over to absorb Derek's body heat, but was met with the cool sheets. She squinted her eyes open the tiniest bit and found that the bathroom light was on, and shining into the bedroom. It was far to bright for five in the morning, especially on a day off. Meredith pulled Derek's pillow over her face to block it out in an attempt to fall back to sleep. Just as she was drifting off into dream land, Derek's footsteps interrupted the peaceful lull.

"Mer, want to get up soon?" Derek asked softly, leaning over the bed and peeking under the pillow currently obstructing her view from the rest of the world.

Meredith groaned, keeping her eyes closed. "We're off..."

"Yeah, but our plane leaves in two hours. We have to get to the airport," he reminded her, still keeping his voice down as she adjusted her senses to awake mode.

"Hmm..." Meredith sighed groggily. As her brain woke up, she remembered that she, Derek, and Mark were flying to New York today to visit with the Shepherd family. Apparently, October was important. With the annual Shepherd family football game, which Derek had missed for the past few years since moving west, Derek's mom's anniversary, a birthday or two, and Kyle's baptism, it was going to be a busy few days.

And the added bonus of meeting the entire Shepherd family tree was a little daunting. With this thought, Meredith wished herself back to sleep. Maybe Derek would feel bad and let her stay home. Unfortunately for Meredith, her husband was persistent. "Mer, we really need to get moving. I know you're tired. I feel bad for waking you up..." Derek whispered. He finally succeeded in pulling the pillow from her face and Meredith stared up at him with her annoyed face on.

"Who books a seven o'clock flight when there was a perfectly good one leaving at noon?" Meredith asked grumpily as she trudged out of the comforts of their warm bed and into the bright bathroom. She closed the door behind her harder than she intended, emphasizing her current mood.

Derek ran his hand through his hair. Not the _best_way to start the day. He only hoped her mood would improve as she woke up a bit, so he decided to go downstairs for her coffee. Coffee always did the trick, at least, most days. When he returned to their bedroom a few minutes later with her travel mug full of the beverage just the way she liked, Meredith was rummaging through her drawer for something to wear.

"I have your coffee," Derek said, hoping the peace offering would help soften her up.

Meredith eventually settled on a pair of jeans and sweater, pulling them out of the drawer. "Thanks," she mumbled as she changed into her clothes. Derek had to give her credit, Meredith was always quick in the mornings when she had to be. She could go from bed to the car in fifteen minutes if need be. With Addison, it was at least an hour's wait. Meredith was low maintenance, yes, but always looked beautiful.

"Damnit!" she cursed. "Damn bureau..."

"You okay?" Derek asked, concerned.

Meredith searched the top of it for her brush while rubbing her toe. "Stubbed my toe," she said. "Where is the brush?"

"In the trunk of the car with all of the other stuff we packed..." he said regretfully. "I think there's an extra one in the bathroom drawer. If not, I'll go out and get it for you."

Without a word, Meredith went into the bathroom. To make himself useful while he waited for her, Derek began making the bed. He could still feel Meredith's lingering body heat on their sheets, and wished they were still curled up in them together, no matter how excited he was to see his family.

Meredith walked out of the bathroom, her hair smoothed of sleep. She slipped on her navy and white Keds before taking a sip of the hot coffee Derek had made for her. He made it just how she loved, knowing exactly how much cream and sugar she liked. When she noticed him making their bed and smoothing out the blanket perfectly, she smiled a little. Derek really was a good husband.

Meredith set the coffee back down on the bureau she currently despised and walked over to him. "Sorry," she whispered, wrapping her arms around him from behind. "I don't mean to be bitchy."

Derek chuckled. "You're not," he said, turning around to face her. "You're tired. I shouldn't have booked such an early flight. I guess I just wanted to make the most of the day..."

She immediately felt guilty. Derek hadn't seen his family in three years, and here she was, complaining about little things. He was close with his family, and was looking forward to spending the next few days with them. "I know," Meredith whispered, closing her eyes as her head rested against his chest.

"I love you," Derek said. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, inhaling the soft scent permeating his senses. Even now, after all this time, the lavender comforted him. _Meredith_ comforted him.

"I love you, too," she breathed, kissing the underside of his jaw before pulling back from their embrace. Meredith checked the digital clock on the nightstand. "Ready to go?"

Derek smiled. "Yep, let's go."

--

As Derek switched the radio station on the way to the Sea-Tac airport, he noticed his wife was sleeping, her head resting on the cool glass of the window. At least they had a six hour flight ahead of them so they could get some rest. They'd both been working extra shifts the past few weeks to make up for the days they'd be missing while in New York. Last night after dropping Charlie off with Alex and Izzie, who had finally gotten engaged a week before, they ate a quick dinner and went straight to bed. Having full time jobs and a dog who had become like a child kept them both plenty busy.

He pulled into the large parking lot, searching for a spot close to the entrance so they would be able to take their luggage in without having to make two trips back and forth. When he found one fairly close, he maneuvered the car into the space and took the keys from the ignition. "Mer," Derek said softly. "We're here."

Meredith sighed tiredly and opened her eyes, blinking a few times as they adjusted to the light. "Oh. Okay," she nodded. She sat up in her seat and stretched out as best she could before opening the door. The two walked around to the trunk and managed to get a hold of all the suitcases and bags without having to run back to the car for more. When they walked into the airport, both were pleasantly surprised to see that it looked somewhat empty, probably because of the early hour.

They checked their luggage at the security gate and upon getting the all clear, walked to the small waiting area where they could sit until their place was boarded in an hour or so. Mark was supposed to be meeting them here, and Derek hoped he wasn't in some woman's bed he picked up at Joe's. Then again, he knew Mark was looking forward to the trip, so he had a feeling he'd show up.

Almost as if Mark was reading his mind, he came up behind them and smiled. "Hey lovebirds," he greeted, noticing how Meredith was curled up in her seat, her head resting on Derek's shoulder.

"Hey Mark," Derek acknowledged.

"Tired, Grey?" Mark asked, taking a seat across from the two of them.

Meredith let out a small yawn and nodded. "Yep."

"I bought coffee...figured we could all use a pick-me-up," he told them. Mark passed two cups over to his friends then took his own from the carrier.

Meredith smiled a little at the gesture. "Thank you, Mark," she said graciously.

"No problem." Mark took a sip of the hot beverage and sucked in a breath. A crying baby could be heard not too far away and he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Why do people bring babies to airports?" he groaned.

Derek laughed. "Well, where else are the parents gonna put them...drop them off with the suitcases, maybe?" he said jokingly. Meredith giggled a little. Watching the two of them tease each other, she was thankful they were friends again. It was so much better than the alternative.

"I'm just saying..." Mark said in his own defense. "I'm gonna go nuts if the kid is on our plane," he sighed, taking another sip of his coffee. "I'm starved and this coffee is going to burn a hole in my stomach. Who wants a _Cinnabon_?"

"Ooh. Me," Meredith said immediately, suddenly seeming much more awake at the prospect of calories and sugar.

Derek swallowed a sip of coffee and looked to his friend. "Do they have a _Cinnabon_ here?"

"I saw one on the way over," Mark nodded. "What kind do you two want?"

"I need to pee, so I'll take a walk with you," Meredith replied, setting her coffee cup on the table between them. She kissed her husband's cheek and asked, "What kind do you want? I know you like cinnamon raisin. Is that okay?"

Derek smiled at how well Meredith knew him, even if it was just a small detail. "Yeah, sounds good," he said. "Your treat, Mark?" Derek asked jokingly, pulling his wallet from his back pocket.

"I'll pay for her," Mark shot back teasingly.

"I would pay, but my wallet is at the bottom of my bag and I don't feel like digging for it," Meredith said with a playful smile, taking the twenty dollar bill from Derek's hand.

Derek laughed. "I never mind paying for you."

"We'll be back," Meredith smiled, leaning down to kiss him quickly.

She and Mark walked down the hall toward the small cluster of shops and restaurants. When the smell of the cinnamon buns filled her nostrils, Meredith moaned softly. "It smells so good..."

"What kind are you getting?" Mark asked as they approached the concession stand.

Meredith studied the overhead menu, pondering which one to purchase. Everything looked so good, choosing one could be a challenge. "Hmm..." she sighed. "I want the chocolate chip one, but I want extra frosting. They never give you enough..."

Mark laughed. "You're the tiniest thing ever. Where do you put all those calories?"

"I inherited my mother's metabolism," she giggled.

The two ordered, received, and paid for their cinnamon buns, and after Meredith made a quick stop to the bathroom, she and Mark returned to the waiting area where Derek was watching over their things.

"Cinnamon raisin," Meredith said with a smile, handing her husband the bun. She took her seat next to him and pulled her own from the bag.

Derek grinned upon seeing Meredith's extra frosted, chocolate chip adorned pastry. He loved that she had an appetite. "That's quite a cinnamon bun..." he chuckled.

"Want some?" Meredith asked as she took a bite. Some of the sticky confection stuck to her lips and Derek quickly kissed it off.

Mark sighed, taking a bite of his pecan bun. "Is this what I have to look forward to on the six hour fight? You two licking sugar off each others lips?"

"Maybe..." Meredith giggled, her mouth full of food.

"Great..." Mark grinned sarcastically. "This'll be fun."

--

Eventually, Flight 522 to New York was called to be boarded, and all three were more than ready. After the flight attendant led them to the row of three seats they had booked, both Derek and Mark were gentlemanly and motioned for Meredith to enter the row first.

Meredith shook her head adamantly. "No, no window seat for me, thanks. Unless you want me to throw up..."

"Well, we wouldn't want that," Derek said quickly. "I'll take the window seat.

Derek walked into the row followed by Meredith, who took her seat next to him. "I think I can handle the middle seat," she giggled, setting her tote bag on the floor in front of her feet.

"Fine with me," Mark shrugged, taking the aisle seat. "Now I can flirt with the blonde two rows ahead. May as well take advantage of the Mile High Club," he reasoned as the three of them fastened their seat belts.

Meredith groaned. "Seriously?"

"Oh, please," Mark chuckled. "Like you two have never done it on a plane before..."

"With each other. Not with some random stranger," Derek said amusedly. Even if Mark's potential sexual endeavors were less than charming, they had to admit, he was a fun source of entertainment.

"Eh...I'm not going to get any while we're at Mom's house. And six hours is a lot of time to kill," Mark shrugged.

Meredith turned to her husband. "Speaking of not getting any...we're not having sex at you mother's house," she said with a definitive nod.

"What? Why?" Derek asked, slightly shocked at this latest development. "I'm pretty sure my mom knows we...do it," he cringed. Saying it out loud made it no less creepy, even if it was the truth.

Meredith made a face, similar to the grimace Derek made at the thought. "Even still, I have to be on top of my game. And sex makes my head all cloudy and I'll end up rambling and making a fool of myself, so no. No sex. Don't even ask," Meredith crossed her arms over her chest. But when the engine of the plane rumbled under their feet, she quickly disentangled them and reached for Derek's hand.

"What the hell?" Mark asked curiously.

Derek stifled a laugh. "She doesn't like taking off. Once we're in the air, she's fine," he explained, noticing how Meredith closed her eyes and leaned her head on the back of the seat.

"Grey? Afraid? I don't believe it..." Mark said. The plane made its way down the runway and ascended into the air. Meredith kept a firm grip on Derek's hand until the plane was sailing through the clouds smoothly.

"Thanks," she breathed, giving him a small smile as she released his hand.

Derek leaned over and kissed her cheek. "You're welcome," he whispered.

Meredith kicked off her Keds and curled her feet up into the seat. When Derek knew she was okay, he decided to press his luck. "Do I get sex now?" he asked.

"No," Meredith smirked, smacking him playfully. "Top of my game, remember? That reminds me..." She reached down and retrieved a notepad and a pen from her tote bag and pulled up her little tray. "I need you to draw me a family tree or whatever..."

"You sure you want to tackle that? Sometimes, it feels like I'm still learning names and I've known the family since I was three," Mark joked.

Meredith swallowed hard. Meeting Derek's entire family for the first time was overwhelming enough, but the size of it just added to the stress. "Well, I can't go in there knowing no one besides Nancy and you Mom," she said. "So...go. Tell me."

"Okay," Derek said, laughing softly. "First is Kathleen. She's married to Robert, and they have six kids," he said, drawing lines to denote each family member. "Robert and Rachel are fourteen, Timmy is--"

Meredith cut him off. "Twins? There's twins in you family?" she asked with wide eyes.

"Liz has twins too," Mark chimed in. "And Derek's dad was a twin."

"_Three_? Three sets of twins?" she gasped. "Derek! How could you not tell me this?"

Derek shrugged. "I didn't think it was a big deal. Just because twins run in the family doesn't mean we'll have them," he chuckled. "But we wanted two anyway, so it really wouldn't be so bad..."

"I'll let it go--for now. But if it happens, just know there's gonna be hell to pay," Meredith said with a smirk. "Keep going."

"Okay. Robert and Rachel are fourteen. Timmy is twelve, Alison is nine, Audrey is six, and Morgan is three," Derek continued.

Meredith sighed. "Damn, that's a lot."

"Kathleen is a frigging baby factory," Mark agreed. "I don't even know why anyone would want six kids in the first place..." he said, still trying to fathom the idea.

"Then there's..."

"Nancy," Meredith nodded. "My arch-nemesis."

Derek laughed. "She doesn't hate you..."

"Nancy hated Addison at first too. Now those two are best friends," Mark said encouragingly, hoping it might make Meredith feel a little better.

"She's really not so bad," Derek shook his head. "John is her husband. They have four kids...Jimmy--he's twelve, named after my dad, James. Then there's Tara and Carly, ten and six. And Sammy is five."

Meredith smiled a little. "That's why we couldn't name Charlie _Sammy_," she nodded.

"Yep," Derek said, kissing her cheek.

"Next comes the Momma's boy," Mark grinned cheekily.

Derek rolled his eyes. "Who? Me or you?" he retorted jokingly. "Then there's me--and you, Mer. We're currently childless." He put an 'X' through a baby face he drew on the chart.

"Thanks for reminding me of our status," she said playfully, brushing her bangs out of her face. "Next is...Liz, right?"

"Right," he said with a nod. "Liz and Jack have four kids. Lauren is eleven, Cara is ten. And Andrew and Justin are four year old twins."

"Lauren, Cara, Andrew, Justin," Meredith repeated, trying to encode them into her memory. As she studied the chart, she couldn't help but wish she had asked for the Shepherd family tree the night Derek told her he had four sisters, nine nieces and five nephews. That would have given her a solid three years to memorize everyone. "Okay, and last is Amy, right?"

Derek nodded in agreement. "Amy is married to Tom."

"And they just had Kyle," Meredith continued. "Who's our godson--or will be in a few days."

"Mmhmm..." Derek pressed a kiss to her temple. "Not so scary, is it?"

Meredith let out an incredulous laugh. "Oh yeah, piece of cake..."

The flight attendant came around to their section with the drink cart. Like clockwork, Mark began to work his magic, shamelessly flirting with her and telling her how the powder blue of her outfit complimented her eyes, yada yada yada. Derek just rolled his eyes, taking the opportunity to talk to his wife. "They're gonna love you, Mer."

"Hmm...let's hope they _like_ me first," she giggled.

Derek could tell she was nervous, even if she tried to play it off. All of those years of of parental disappointment were hard wounds to heal. But Derek knew that she had nothing to worry about. Meredith would fit right in. "They will," he smiled. "And my nieces...don't be surprised if they pull you in ten different directions when we get into the house."

"Are the kids going to ask where Aunt Addison is?" Meredith asked, adjusting herself in her small seat to get more comfortable.

Derek shook his head. "I don't think they're going to ask. The girls explained it to them. It'll be fine, Mer. I promise," he whispered, running his lips over her earlobe.

Meredith shivered involuntarily, her neck breaking out into goosebumps. "Hmm...you know that when you do that, you get me all turned on."

"Maybe we could sneak in the bathroom before Mark gets to it," Derek grinned, a naughty glint in his eye. He tugged in her earlobe gently with his teeth and Meredith was unsuccessful at stifling a moan.

"What did I say?" she asked quietly, making no attempt to stop him despite her protests.

"No sex at my Mom's house."

"Or here," Meredith corrected. "No sex here either."

Derek smiled against her skin. He knew she appreciated the distraction of meeting his family, even if she'd never admit it. PDAs on a plane were probably inappropriate, but with Mark two seats away, still chatting it up with the flight attendant as she passed out small snacks, he figured it was okay. "We could..." he suggested.

"Give it up, Derek. Not happening," she giggled, moving to rest her head on his shoulder.

He wrapped his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "You say that now..."

"I miss Charlie," Meredith said, frowning a little as she studied the Shepherd family tree in her hands.

Derek smiled. "I have pictures of him on my phone."

Meredith lifted her head slightly to meet his eye line. "You do?" she asked, her eyes bright.

"I figured you would miss him so I took some pictures of him last night before we dropped him off," Derek explained, happy that he thought of it. Charlie was extremely attached to both of them, and he knew they'd miss him while they were away, even if it was just for a few days.

"Thank you, Derek," Meredith whispered, kissing his freshly shaven cheek softly.

"You're welcome." He brushed her hair behind her shoulders, breathing in the flowery scent as it made its way to his nose.

Meredith yawned into his shirt. "Would you mind if I took a nap?"

"Not at all," Derek said, shaking his head. He reached for his pillow and handed it to her. "Here. Use mine too."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled. She squirmed in her seat for a moment trying to find a comfortable position when Derek stopped her.

"Use my lap as a pillow," he offered. "It'll be more comfy."

Meredith looked up at him, an appreciative smile on her face. "You don't care?"

"No," Derek laughed. "I'd be honored."

"Cheesy," Meredith smirked, rolling her eyes. She propped Derek's pillow down on his lap and proceeded to lie down, her face nuzzled into his sweater. "Do you think Mark would mind if I draped my legs over his lap?" she asked with a giggle.

Derek shrugged. "Who cares? Do it," he nodded.

Meredith hesitated for a moment before dropping her legs over Mark's lap. Mark turned his head toward the two of them curiously. "What the hell are you doing, Grey?" he asked, more amused than angry.

"Nap time," Meredith said in response, her eyelids becoming heavy since moving to a reclined position.

"Would you like a foot massage too? Or am I just a cushion?" Mark asked with a grin.

"Hey, if you wanna rub my feet, go for it," Meredith encouraged sleepily.

Mark dropped his head to the back of his seat. "I'll pass, but thanks. And just to let you know, this..." he said, gesturing to Meredith's legs. "...kind of ruins my chance of getting laid. Good thing I love you like my little sister..."

"Thank you, Mark," Meredith smiled, draping the small airline blanket over herself. She sighed contentedly when Derek began rubbing her back. He always knew how relax her--one of the many things Meredith loved about her husband. Within minutes, she had slipped into sleep, her breathing evening out as she relaxed more and more. Derek kept one hand protectively on her back so she wouldn't accidentally roll off, and with the other, continued his caressing.

Mark took a sip of the drink his lusty flight attendant gave him and looked over to the two of them when he heard a strange noise. "What the...is Grey snoring?"

"Yeah," Derek chuckled softly, careful not to disturb her. "She is. It's actually pretty light compared to the usual."

"You mean she's usually louder?" Mark asked before smirking a little. "Snoring, I mean. Not in a 'between the sheets' way."

Derek rolled his eyes at his friend's immaturity. "It depends. When she's sick, it's worse. But it doesn't bother me. I find it charming," he grinned.

"That's one word for it," Mark said sarcastically, noticing how Meredith was gently grasping the fabric of Derek's sweater in her hand. "Why is she holding onto you for dear life?"

"What is this? Twenty Questions?" Derek laughed. "She's not holding onto me for dear life. We always hold each other when we sleep. It's just a comfort thing..." he explained, looking down at his sleeping wife and smiling lovingly.

Mark let out a sigh and shook his head, an amused grin on his face. But rather than make a snarky comment, he decided to take the conversation a different route. "So you think Mer will be okay?"

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "She'll be fine. Family freaks her out--which I get," he said before laughing. "She told me not to leave her side unless absolutely necessary."

"Well, the house is gonna be full of activity. You two could probably sneak away somewhere unnoticed," Mark said with a raise of his eyebrows.

"She already said no sex, remember?" Derek asked humorously. "Besides, I'm pretty sure she's against the idea of us having sex against the tree in the backyard..."

Mark whistled suggestively. "If you need a lookout, I'm your man."

"You really are the most immature human on the planet. You know that right?"

"It's a gift," Mark agreed, playing into his friend's sarcasm.

Derek just laughed and rolled his eyes as he ran his fingers up and down Meredith's back gently. "Right..."

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I apologize that I can't update more frequently. Once school is over, I should be able to bank some so I can post more often. **

**Also, I'm writing a MerDer post 5x17 one shot. My plan is to have it posted tonight, but if not, definitely tomorrow. I hope you like that too, if you decide to read it. :)**


	48. Meeting the Family

**OH. MY. GOODNESS. Elevator Love Letter was beyond everything I expected it to be. That proposal was absolutely beautiful. I cried for joy into the wee hours of the morning. There's no way in heck I could have dreamt that up. And I just read that they're getting married on May 7th! Again, OMG!**

"I think I'm gonna throw up," Meredith said as they drove down Applewood Lane, a small residential street located in a quiet New York suburb. When Meredith pictured New York, she saw tall buildings and taxis and the hustle and bustle of the city. But being here, in Derek's hometown, she never would have suspected she was in the same state. The little suburb was so...Derek.

Derek laughed, pulling their rental car into the large driveway. "Mer, relax. I promise you, it's going to be fine," he assured her.

"I should have saved my air-sick bag from the plane in case you needed it," Mark said jokingly.

The three of them got out of the small black sedan and Derek popped open the trunk. "Mark, shut up," Derek shot back amusedly before kissing Meredith's cheek. "Do you trust me?" he whispered.

Meredith nodded. "Of course," she replied. "Just...don't leave my side..."

"I won't," he chuckled. The three of them grabbed as much luggage as the could in one trip, and Derek took hold of her hand. "Ready?" he asked as they walked up to the front door, painted a burnt red color and decorated with a autumn wreath.

"Guess so," Meredith said, letting out a breath.

With his free hand, Mark turned the knob and pushed open the front door. The smell of fresh baked cookies filled the air and they could hear talking and children's laughter ringing through the home. "We're here!" Mark announced.

Meredith bit her lip nervously as a crowd of people swarmed to the foyer to meet them. She felt slightly relieved when Derek's mother's voice could be heard approaching them. "My boys! And Meredith!" she exclaimed happily, pulling all three of them in for a huge hug. "How are you, dears? How was your flight? Are you hungry? We have cookies..." Linda said, pressing the back of her hand to Derek's cheek. "It's chilly out there. Come in and get warmed up," she ordered, waving them into the house.

"We still have suitcases in the trunk," Derek replied. "We'll be back in a minute, Mer."

Before Meredith could protest, the rest of the family began speaking to her all at once. "Hi, Meredith. I'm Robert--"

"Kathleen's husband," Meredith finished before blushing in embarrassment.

"She knows our names. I love her already," Rob joked. "Nice to meet you."

Meredith smiled. Derek's family was actually...nice. Not that she thought they'd be mean. She just had no idea what to expect. Being an apple on the Grey family tree, feeling apprehensive came naturally. "You too," Meredith said softly.

"Alison, Timmy, no wrestling!" a female voice called. A tall brunette woman walked into the living room wearing an apron. "Sorry about that," she laughed. "My children seem to think that because they're at grandma's, they can get away with murder. Hi, Meredith. I'm Kathleen."

"Hi," Meredith said meekly. The brothers-in-law were one thing, but the Shepherd sisters raised the stakes.

Luckily, Derek and Mark walked back into the house with the rest of the bags and set them by the stairs to be taken up eventually. "Hi," a small girl's voice said sweetly. Meredith looked around for the source, but turned her head downward when she felt a hand tugging on the pant leg of her jeans.

"Oh. Hi," Meredith said with a smile, kneeling down to greet the small blonde girl. "Are you...Morgan?" Meredith asked.

The small girl nodded. "Yeah."

"I'm Meredith. It's nice to meet you, Morgan," Meredith said with a kind smile.

"I'm three," Morgan said, holding up three fingers.

Meredith giggled. "Wow, such a big girl!" she said enthusiastically.

"Can we play hairdresser later?" the little girl asked excitedly, bouncing up and down in her little pink shoes.

"Sure, sweetie," Meredith laughed as Derek knelt down next to her.

He smiled when he saw his niece. "Hey Morgan. Remember me?"

The little girl whose eyes matched Derek's smiled slightly. "Uncle Derek."

"That's right," Derek laughed, pulling her in for a hug. "The last time I saw you, you were just a baby."

"I'm three now," Morgan repeated. "Not a baby."

"That's right," he agreed, kissing her cheek.

When another one of the Shepherd children called her over to play, Morgan scurried off into the family room. "She's adorable, Derek," Meredith smiled, taking his hand as they stood up. "Please don't leave my side."

"Promise," he whispered, kissing her softly.

"There's our baby brother," Kathleen and Nancy teased, hugging him.

Derek rolled his eyes. "Nice to see you, too," he laughed.

After they pulled back from their hug, Nancy looked to Meredith. "Hello, Meredith. How are you?"

"I'm...great. How are you doing?" she asked politely.

"Good," Nancy nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

Meredith was thankful when a group of children ran up to join them. "Uncle Derek! Uncle Mark!" they exclaimed excitedly. Mark and Derek quickly fell into the uncle role and began talking and laughing with the little kids, gasping when they told them of their accomplishments at school or soccer goals, and promising to play with them during their visit.

By the time Meredith had been introduced to nearly every member of the Shepherd family, of course she was feeling a little overwhelmed, but at the same time, she felt relieved by how nice they all are. Sisters, brothers-in-law, nieces and nephews--everyone was so warm and welcoming. With the exception of seeing an aunt and uncle every so often as a child, Meredith really had no family of her own, besides her hospital family and her father's family. So having the chance to be part of the Shepherd family who hugged each other and laughed and baked and genuinely loved each other was amazing.

While Mark was being pulled into the family room by the nephews to play a video game, Mrs. Shepherd called Meredith and Derek over into the dining room. "I'm sorry if that felt like you were being bombarded, sweetheart," Linda laughed.

"Oh, no, it's fine. Everyone is so nice, Mom," Meredith said sincerely. Calling Derek's mother Mom should have felt weird, but it wasn't. Meredith loved her mother in her own way, but she loved Derek's mom too. Since the second they had been introduced months ago, Meredith felt such a warm presence and knew immediately why Derek was the person he was.

"Good, I'm glad," she smiled, squeezing Meredith's arm gently.

"Where's Amy, Tom, and the baby?" Derek asked.

Linda grabbed the plate of cookies off the table and held it out to them. "They'll be here in a bit. Kyle was fussy this morning, so he's napping now. Amy called a little bit ago and said they'd be here for dinner tonight."

"Oh, good," Meredith smiled. "We saw the pictures. He's just adorable."

Linda smiled. "He is. He looks just like my Derek when he was a baby," she said proudly. "Same dark hair and blue eyes."

"Of course they did," Derek laughed. "Every Shepherd has blue eyes...except Nancy. I'm convinced she was adopted," he joked.

"Derek, that's enough," his mother scolded, unable to hide her smile. "Okay, why don't you two go start getting unpacked in Derek's room. I'm sure you could use a little quiet time, especially after your flight."

Derek nodded and kissed his mom's cheek. He and Meredith walked through the living room towards the stairs and managed to carry up all of their bags with one trip. On the way up the steps, Meredith smiled when she saw the wall covered in pictures of the Shepherd children. She giggled a little when she spotted one of Derek at his first birthday party. "Derek, you're adorable in these pictures..."

He smirked. "And I'm not adorable now?" he asked jokingly as the reached the hall. "There's pictures everywhere. I'm surprised my mom doesn't just wallpaper the house in them."

"I think it's sweet," Meredith grinned. "Oh, is this your room?" she asked excitedly when Derek stopped in front of one of the wooden doors.

"Yep," he replied, turning the knob and allowing her to enter first. "It's like I never left," Derek laughed as he set the bags down on the floor.

Meredith shut the door so they could have a little privacy, then dropped down onto the full sized bed. "Derek, this room is so...you."

"Why is that?" he asked, forgetting all about the suitcases as he lay down next to her.

"The awards and trophies and family pictures...and _The Clash_ poster," she giggled. "Very, very you..."

Derek pulled her up against him, wrapping his arm around her waist and kissing her. He hadn't been able to kiss her the way he wanted to all day, and now, when they finally had some privacy, he was going to take advantage of the opportunity. "I love you," he murmured against her lips.

Meredith smiled and ran her fingers through his hair. "I love you, too."

"You know...I've never had a girl in my bed before," he mentioned casually, pulling her on top of him.

"What about Addison?" Meredith asked.

Derek laughed. "Bringing up my ex-wife while I'm trying to seduce you? That's cruel..." he sighed. "Nope. Addison and I never spent the night here. We only lived a half hour away, so we just drove back home the same day whenever we visited."

"You never had any of your high school girlfriends over to...study or anything?" she continued playfully.

"We usually studied in the kitchen. My mom would never have let me up here with a girl," Derek chuckled.

Meredith smirked. "Well, that doesn't seem right...I may have to do you a favor and take your bedroom virginity," she said seductively as she kissed his jaw line.

"I thought you said no sex," he reminded her. He knew that if he tried hard enough, there would be sex. And Meredith didn't seem to be protesting all that much anyway.

"Well, I might change my mind. We'll see how things go..." Meredith said nonchalantly, rolling off of him.

Derek ran his fingers through her hair and rested her hand on the back of her head. "Deal."

"I'm glad we came here," she said quietly, wrapping her arm around his waist.

He erupted into goose bumps when she slipped her hand under his shirt so she could rub his back with her fingers. Derek smiled at her. "Yeah?"

She nodded. "Yeah. Everybody is just...they're all so great," she breathed. "I probably shouldn't have been surprised though. They're _your_ family, after all. Can't say you'd be saying the same about my relatives..." she giggled.

"Crazy aunts and uncles?" he asked with a laugh.

"Something like that. I much prefer your side of the family," Meredith smiled, leaning in and kissing him again. "Should we go back downstairs?"

"No," Derek chuckled. "Well, not yet. And the way you're rubbing my back...maybe not until morning."

Meredith giggled. "I just don't want your family thinking we're up here doing...porny things."

"Do you want to do porny things? Because we can," he responded.

"If--and I'm not saying I'm giving in--but _if _anything even remotely porny happens in this room, it's going to be when everybody is sleeping," Meredith said definitively.

Derek laughed. "You sure that's a good idea? We could probably get away with it now without anyone suspecting anything with all the noise downstairs."

"I know how to do quiet. Remember that time at the steakhouse? I was very quiet..." she purred, pressing her body closer to his.

"That was fun," Derek said softly as he kissed the side of her neck. "We should go there again."

"We should," Meredith agreed, tilting her head to the side for him. "I really really love you, Derek," she blurted out before blushing.

Derek just smiled back at her. "I really really love you, too."

"It's just...being here with you and seeing all of those kids...and knowing that we'll be back one day with our own, and how they'll all play together, it just...I don't know. I've never been to any type of family thing before, but this is...I'm glad I'm here with you," Meredith said quietly.

A stray tear rolled out of the corner of her eye and Derek wiped it away with his thumb. "I'm glad you're here, too."

Meredith raised her head, still slightly embarrassed by her crying and asked, "Does your mom has any more photo albums? I want to see more of your baby pictures later on."

"There's a whole bookshelf downstairs," he laughed. "We can bring them upstairs later."

"Okay," Meredith smiled, looking over to the nightstand. "Is that you and your dad?"

Derek rolled over and grabbed the picture. The two sat up on the bed and he handed it to her. "Yeah," he smiled sadly. "It's me and him when we went camping. I think I was seven or eight."

"You look just like him," Meredith said softly as she rested her head on his shoulder. "And you're the cutest little boy I've ever seen...I know you're positive about the "all girls" thing--and they'll probably be twins thanks to your gene pool--but if we have a little boy, I hope he looks just like you."

"Yeah," Derek said with a soft laugh, fighting back his own tears as he stared down at the framed photo.

Meredith kissed his cheek. "You miss him."

Derek smiled slightly. "Yeah," he nodded. "He would have loved you. When I was little, he always told me that I was growing up so fast. He died when I was nine. He never met any of my girlfriends or saw me get married. But I remember, when we found out he was sick, he and I would just talk. He talked to my sisters a lot too, but I guess he figured they had my mom for things like boyfriend talks and whatever else girls talk about," he chuckled, wiping a tear away from under his eye. "He told me to marry a girl that I really really loved...he said don't just get married because mom and the girls love her, but marry the girl that I'd give my life for in a split second without thinking twice about it."

Meredith bit her lip, feeling the tears well in her eyes again. She reached over and squeezed his hand supportively. Meredith knew a lot about Derek's past, but these little details are what she really loved. Pieces of Derek that made him who he was. "Like you did for me," she whispered, running her thumb over the back of his hand.

"Hmmm..." Derek hummed, pressing a kiss to her temple. "You know, back when Addison and Mark..." he trailed off. "I was so angry. I even got angry at my dad. And that's wrong but...I don't know, I guess I thought he should have been looking out for me. I didn't get it then. Mark and my dad were my best friends, and they both left me. Then I moved to Seattle. I could have went anywhere, but I chose Seattle."

"Where you met me," Meredith said softly, looking into the blue eyes of his she loved.

"Where I met you," he repeated with a small smile. "The weird thing is, as I was driving to Joe's that night, my dad's favorite song came on the radio. That annoying _Beatles_ song..._I Want to Hold Your Hand_--horrible song, I know," he laughed. "But he always used to sing it to my mom as a joke. Anyway, as I pulled into Joe's that night, that song was on the radio. I sat in the car and waited until it was over before going inside. Just couldn't let myself turn the car off. And when I went inside, I met the love of my life," Derek said, smiling. "I think he was looking out for me the whole time. I think he knew about you way before I did. And I think he brought me to you."

"Derek," Meredith whispered, too many tears escaping her eyes to catch them all.

"He would have loved you--he _does_ love you," Derek nodded, kissing her forehead.

Meredith sniffled and smiled softly. "Well, I guess I love him too. Without him, there'd be no you. So I'm as grateful to him as you are."

Derek set the picture on the bed and wrapped his arms around his wife. "I love you, Mer. I love you so much," he said softly into her hair.

"I love you, too," Meredith said, resting her head on his shoulder.

The two sat in silence for a few moments, holding each other in their embrace. Meredith ran her fingers down his back and smiled. Some time ago, she never thought she'd be in Derek's childhood room. Being here with him, she felt like part of a real family. She was a daughter-in-law, a sister-in-law, an aunt, and a wife. Meredith kissed his cheek and pulled back slightly. "Your mom probably thinks we're up here making a baby," she giggled.

"I don't think she'd mind," Derek laughed. "Her grandchildren are her pride and joy."

"You're the last of the kids to give them to her," Meredith pointed out.

Derek smiled. "Yeah, but ours will be the best," he said playfully.

Meredith nodded, smirking at him. "Uh huh..."

"They will be," he said confidently. "Beautiful, amazing geniuses..."

"Well, I already knew that," Meredith giggled.

Derek kissed her cheek. "Wanna head back downstairs? Mark probably needs help beating the kids at the video games."

"Yeah," she nodded. "I already promised the girls I'd play hairdresser."

"Tell them to do something hot," he joked. "That way you can leave it in for tonight."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You mean for the sex I never actually agreed on?" she asked as the two walked out of Derek's bedroom and headed for the stairs.

"Yep," Derek confirmed. "Steakhouse style sex."

"Derek!" she laughed. "That was dirty."

He just smirked, taking her hand as they walked down the steps. "Yeah, it was."

"Hey, you two. Christening the bedroom?" Mark asked with a grin as he walked by the two of them with a drink in his hand.

"No!" Meredith said, rolling her eyes. "Maybe later though...if Derek behaves."

The three of them reached the family room that contained several children and adults scatted about. "I always behave..." Derek said cockily.

"Uncle Derek! Will you play with us?" one of his nephews asked, sitting in front of the TV and holding a video game control.

Derek kissed Meredith's cheek. "Sure, buddy," he nodded. "Wanna play with us?"

Before Meredith could answer, she felt a small hand tugging at hers. "Aunt Meredith, can we play hairdresser now?" Morgan asked.

Meredith smiled down at the little girl. "Sure, sweetheart."

Derek looked to Meredith as she walked behind them toward the couch. "Something hot," he mouthed, pointing to her hair.

Meredith giggled and shook her head at him. "You can sit here," Sammy, Nancy's five year old daughter said, pointing to a pillow on the floor. "That's where the customers sit."

"Okay," Meredith smiled, taking a seat where she had been asked, thankful that Derek and Mark were only a few feet away playing video games.

"You have pretty hair, Aunt Meredith," Audrey said as the three girls brushed it out gently.

"Oh, thank you," Meredith said. She could get used to this fast. Having the three of them brush her hair was like heaven.

"Can we do pigtails?" they asked excitedly.

Meredith laughed. "Sounds good to me."

"Are you going to have a baby one day, Aunt Meredith?" Sammy asked out of the blue.

"Yeah, one day," Meredith replied.

Audrey's face lit up and she smiled. "Soon?"

"Well, Uncle Derek and I are busy doctors, so not quite yet. But eventually, we want to," she explained.

"Can you have a girl? Boys are annoying," Sammy said, scrunching her nose.

Meredith giggled, running her hand over her stomach subconsciously. "I'll do my best, hun."

"Are you friends with Aunt Addison?" Carly, Nancy's eight year old, asked from her spot next to them on the couch.

Somehow, Meredith knew this question would come up at some point, and it probably wouldn't be the last time. "Yeah, we are. She even came to our wedding."

"She used to play hairdresser with us too," Audrey giggled.

Meredith laughed a little at the thought of the young girls putting ribbons and clips and bows in Addison's hair. It takes a good aunt to let them do something like that.

"One time, Uncle Derek and Aunt Addison watched us while our parents went to the movies. That was fun," Carly smiled.

"Uncle Derek watched _Cinderella_ with us and let us stay up late," one of the girls informed her. "It was sad when Uncle Derek, Aunt Addie, and Uncle Mark moved away."

"Do they live where you live?" Audrey asked as she secured the pink scrunchie in Meredith's pigtail.

"Uncle Mark and Uncle Derek both live in Seattle, where I live. But your Aunt Addison moved to California because she got a new job. But we all used to work together," Meredith explained.

Mark overheard the conversation from where he was sitting and whispered to Derek. "The girls are really grilling Mer about Addison."

Derek just laughed. "Nancy probably has them wired and is listening from the kitchen," he joked.

"Wouldn't put it past her," Mark sighed.

"You look pretty, Aunt Meredith," Morgan smiled when the girls were done with Meredith's hair-do. She handed her a mirror and Meredith smiled widely.

"You girls did a great job. I love it! Thank you," she said enthusiastically.

Derek turned his head away from the video game to admire his nieces' work. "She looks more beautiful than ever," he grinned. "Very, very hot," Derek mouthed to her.

"Shut up," Meredith mouthed back, unable to hide her smile. This family thing was nice.

**This probably seems like a weird place to stop, I know. I originally had a little more, but as I was writing, I decided to just put the continuation in the next chapter. The Shepherd visit will take place over several chapters. This was more of an intro. to the family and for Meredith to get a feel for everything. Hope you enjoyed it. :)**

**Reviews make my day. :)**


	49. French Braids & Family Dinners

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no. It's not mine.**

**Thanks for all the reviews! I really appreciate them! :)**

An hour or so passed, during which time Meredith continued to play hairdresser with her little nieces and Derek played video games with the boys. The girls had since taken out Meredith's pigtails and were now determined to braid Meredith's entire head of hair. She didn't care though; it was nice to be pampered, even if her hair could turn out to be a knotty, frizzy mess when it came time to shower.

"Can you do French braids?" Sammy asked with hopeful eyes as she tied a hair band to the end of Meredith's braid to secure it. "Mommy can't do them good."

Meredith smiled. "I can, actually. Do you want me to do them for you?"

"Yeah!" Sammy exclaimed, grabbing two hair ties off the couch and sitting on Meredith's lap.

Derek looked back briefly and smiled at his wife. Meredith always claimed that she wasn't good with little kids, but she was certainly wrong about that. Their little nieces absolutely adored her, and Derek could tell she adored them too.

Meredith separated Sammy's hair into equal sections for pigtail French braids and began combing through the five year olds light brown hair, her nimble surgery fingers making sure that every hair switch and cross-over was precise, pulled tightly and securely. Derek was stunned by how quickly she finished. Apparently Meredith's surgical brilliance could also be useful in doing French braids.

"All done," Meredith smiled when she had finished, handing the little girl the mirror.

Sammy gasped as she admired her new hair-do. "Wow! They look so pretty! Thanks Aunt Meredith!" she laughed, giving Meredith a hug.

Meredith hugged the little girl back. "I'm glad you like them, sweetie."

"Oh, you're here!" they heard Linda exclaim from the foyer. Meredith wasn't sure who it was she was talking to, but then remembered that Amy and Tom were coming over with the baby around dinner time. Derek must have been thinking the same thing because he got up from his spot on the floor and smiled. "Mark, Mer...wanna go..." he asked. "We'll be back," he said to the little kids. "You girls can finish Aunt Mer's prom-do in few minutes, okay?" he said with chuckle.

The three adults left the room and made their way to the foyer to greet even more members of the Shepherd family. "Derek! Mark!" Amy said excitedly, holding the baby close to her chest as she kissed and hugged both of them. "And Meredith, it's so nice to meet you," she grinned, hugging her too. "I can see you were the latest customer at the little girls' beauty salon..."

Meredith forgot about the twenty or so braids currently in her hair and blushed slightly. "Yeah, I couldn't say no."

"They krimped mine once. Consider yourself lucky for the braids," Amy laughed jokingly.

Tom, Amy's husband, hugged Derek and Mark before hugging Meredith as well. "It's so good to finally meet you, Meredith. Mom just raves about you. I think you're the favorite," he teased, setting the baby's bag on a nearby chair.

"It's nice to meet you both, too," Meredith smiled. "He's adorable..."

"Can I?" Derek asked with a grin. He looked like a little kid at Christmas. His nieces and nephews were so important to him, and Meredith knew he loved each and every one so much.

"Oh, sure," Amy nodded, passing her baby over to her older brother. "Tom and I are going to go say hi to the family. Feel free to get to know him..." she giggled, kissing both her son's and her brother's cheeks.

Derek smiled as Kyle rested his head on his chest. "Okay."

"The next baby in this house had best be yours, Derek, " Linda joked, kissing the top of her one month old grandson's head before leaving the room with Amy, Tom, and Mark.

"Was she serious?" Meredith asked as she ran her finger over the back of the small baby's hand.

Derek laughed. "It wouldn't surprise me..."

"He looks like you from your baby book--the one your mom gave us when she visited," Meredith said softly as she and Derek walked to the nearby empty den so they could sit somewhere quiet.

"He does," Derek agreed, shifting the baby so he was lying in the crook of his arm.

Babies were never Meredith's forte. It's not that she didn't like them; she was actually quite good with them. But she just never thought she'd actually get the chance to have her own one day. As she watched how Derek held the newborn with ease, and seemed so natural with him, she tried to imagine how she'd feel when he held their own child. She and Derek often had the "when we do" conversation about kids, but Meredith knew that when the day actually came, the reality was going to be a million times greater than the thought.

Meredith rested her head on Derek's shoulder. "Hey Kyle," she whispered to the blue eyed baby who was staring up at her. "You look just like your Uncle Derek did when he was little..."

The small baby scrunched his nose, a disgusted look on his face and Derek laughed. "Well, that wasn't so nice."

Meredith mirrored her husband's laugh. Their nephew really was adorable. "Where do they live?" she asked.

"Kathleen, Liz, and Amy all live close. Nancy lives in Connecticut, so she's staying here. But everyone comes back in the morning. Good thing my room has a lock, so you and I can sleep in..." Getting the chance to sleep late was always a welcomed luxury of being away from home, and they planned to take advantage of the opportunity.

"I'm sure it'll be easy to sleep with kids running around down here," Meredith teased, curling up closer to Derek on the couch.

Derek smirked, kissing her temple. "Well, you and I will be so sexed out, that we'll sleep right through it," he grinned.

Meredith just laughed. Getting in her pants was never far from Derek's mind. "Right..."

"You want to hold him?" Derek asked with a smile.

"Yeah, sure," Meredith nodded. Derek supported his hand behind Kyle's head and handed the baby over to Meredith, who cradled him in her arms. Kyle turned his face towards Meredith's chest and held onto her shirt, his eyes sleepily opening and closing.

Derek smiled at how comfortable she was with their nephew. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. "I love you."

Meredith leaned in to kiss him. "I love you, too," she whispered before pressing her lips against his. "And I think I already fell in love with him..."

"He must feel comfortable around us. Most babies scream when anyone but their mom or dad holds them," Derek chuckled, watching how Kyle cuddled into Meredith, still keeping a tight grip on her shirt.

"You know...this really isn't helping with the whole waiting until July to start making a baby thing," Meredith pointed out as she gently rubbed the baby's back.

Derek smiled softly. "We'll make it," he assured her. As much as they wanted to have a baby, it was too soon. Life kept them plenty busy these days, and having the responsibility of raising a child as well as taking care of Charlie was just too much to handle right now.

Meredith nodded slightly. "Yeah." She leaned down and kissed the small baby's hand. "He's so tiny. I never want to put him down. Oh, maybe instead of partaking in the Shepherd family football game, I could watch him. Win win."

Derek laughed. "You don't wanna play?"

"Not exactly good at sports. My hand eye coordination is only good in the bedroom," Meredith pointed out before gasping slightly. "Sorry, Kyle. I'm a bad, bad influence..."

"You are very flexible..." Derek agreed, cupping her face and kissing her sweetly.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I know."

"You're fresh meat though. They might make you play..."

"Well, good thing my husband can get me out of it then," she giggled, looking down at their nephew as he whimpered, nuzzling his face into Meredith's breast. "I think he's hungry. Is Amy breastfeeding?"

Derek chuckled. "Bad images, Mer. She's my baby sister. But yeah, she probably is."

"That's a beautiful thing, Derek," Meredith said with a smile, cradling the baby closer in her arms. "Okay sweet pea, let's go find Mommy..."

As Meredith went to raise up off the couch, Amy walked into the den. She smiled when she saw her sister-in-law holding her son so tenderly. "I think he's hungry. He was doing the nuzzling thing..." Meredith explained, rubbing the baby's back.

"Do you need to?" Derek asked vaguely, pointing to the vicinity of his own chest awkwardly. It didn't matter that they were all grown up. Talking about breast feeding with your little sister never got any easier.

Amy rolled her eyes and laughed at her older brother. "They're called boobs, Der," she said, much to Meredith's amusement. "I figured people would want to hold him and feed him, so I pumped a few bottles. Do you two want to feed him?"

"Yeah. Sure," Meredith replied immediately while she fixed Kyle's bootie.

Amy smiled. "I'll go get his diaper bag and grab one for you." She kissed the back of her son's head and made her way into the living room.

"Your sister is adorable, Derek," Meredith giggled, adjusting the baby to her other shoulder.

"She's my favorite," he joked. "Just don't tell anyone."

"I heard that, Derek," Amy announced as she walked back into the room. She handed Meredith the bottle and a bib then patted Derek's shoulder. "I always knew I was your favorite anyway...by the way, Mom wanted me to tell you that dinner is in twenty minutes or so."

"Okay," Derek smiled. "Thanks, Ame."

"What kind of doctor is she?" Meredith asked after Amy left the den, her nieces calling her into the living room.

Derek grinned. "She's a pediatrician. Very fitting," he pointed out with a laugh. "You need help?"

"I got it. Just hold the bottle for a sec while I get him situated," Meredith said. She moved to the end of the couch so she could better support the baby. "Okay Kyle. You ready to eat, peanut?" she whispered softly to the baby as she laid him in her arms. Kyle immediately snuggled into her, feeling completely safe in his aunt's arms. Meredith took the bottle from Derek and put it in Kyle's mouth. He began sucking without any hesitation, clutching onto Meredith's shirt once again.

Derek was amazed at how natural she was with him. It seemed as though Kyle could be her baby, she was so at ease. Meredith looked over to her husband, noticing how he was staring at her as she fed him. "What?" she asked curiously.

"Hmm? Oh, nothing. It's just...you're so good with them. Kyle, all of our nieces and nephews...you're amazing," he said in awe.

"Feeding a baby isn't that hard," Meredith said, wiping some milk from the baby's chin with the elephant bib Amy had given him.

Derek took Kyle's tiny bootied foot in his hand and smiled at his wife. "You know what I mean," he laughed, kissing her cheek. "You're going to be a damn good mom."

"We'll let little Derek and Meredith Jr. be the judges of that one," she replied jokingly. Since finding out about the multiples that ran in Derek's side of the family, Meredith could only hope that the gene passed over them. They wanted two or three kids, but having more than one at once would without a doubt result in her one way trip to the psych ward.

"Aah...our inevitable twins," he assumed, laughing. "Twins would be fun," Derek said musingly.

Meredith rolled her eyes. Her husband could always be counted on to find the silver lining. "A blast."

"Double the toys, double the cute little outfits..."

"Double the poop, double the throw up," she countered sarcastically, giggling a little when Kyle gave her a small smile as he drank his bottle. "See? Kyle agrees with me."

"He just thinks his aunt is being silly," Derek grinned. "I'm pretty sure twins are genetically determined by the mother though. So if we do, it'll be because your egg split, nothing to do with me..." he said with a laugh.

Meredith smirked. "Yeah well, when I'm nine months pregnant with two babies working their way out of my body, don't be surprised when I hold your sperm accountable."

Derek laughed at her comment. The thought of a laboring Meredith threatening to perform his vasectomy with her bare hands was entirely too amusing. "Fair enough." He looked up when he heard footsteps approaching the doorway.

Mark entered the den with Andrew, a four year old nephew, hooked onto him for a piggy-back ride. "What are you two talking about?"

"Poop and throw up," Meredith said with a dry smirk.

"Eww!" Andrew squealed, laughing.

"Hmm...nice," Mark nodded. "On that note, Mom wanted me to tell you that dinner is done," he explained, hoisting the young boy up higher so he wouldn't slip. "If you want a good seat, get in there."

"Okay," Derek replied. "Ready to go in, Mer?"

Meredith nodded, keeping hold of the baby as she got off the couch. Kyle opened his eyes curiously and looked to her, the bottle still between his lips. "I'm sorry to disturb you, pumpkin," she giggled. "We're just going to eat."

"Since when is Grey mushy and cheerful?" Mark asked Derek playfully. It seemed as though Meredith's dirty mistress side had been replaced with permanent bright and shiny-ness.

Derek smiled as they entered the large dining room with the specially made table, complete with three extra leafs needed to accomodate the lare family. "Around babies, she gets like that. It's cute."

"I don't know...drunk and scary Meredith is fun sometimes," Mark pointed out. Andrew hopped off his back and ran to find a seat next to his brother, much to Mark's appreciation. "God, my back is gonna hurt tomorrow."

"Gettin' old, Mark," Derek mocked, pulling back a chair for Meredith, who was still feeding the baby.

"We're the same age. If I'm getting old, you are too," Mark said, moving to take a seat next to Derek before Meredith stopped him.

She grabbed onto his shirt and shook her head. "Sit on the other side of me. I need you both to keep me safe."

Mark grinned and Derek just laughed. Obviously they didn't understand the horror of being the new kid on the block. She needed them to shield her from the possible interrogation. "Fine," Mark conceded, taking a seat in the empty chair on Meredith's right.

"They're not going to throw food at you, I promise," Derek chuckled as he leaned in and kissed her cheek.

"I know. It's just that Mark is my friend, and I'd like him to sit next to me," Meredith shrugged, rubbing Kyle's cheek softly with her finger.

Derek smiled knowingly. She was nervous. The first family dinner was like being on trial, at least in Meredith's eyes. "Okay."

"Uncle Derek, can I sit next to you?" Sammy asked, hopping up into the chair before Derek could give her an answer.

"Sure, Princess," he laughed. He kissed the top of his niece's head, and Meredith smiled at her husband. "You girls still need to finish Aunt Mer's hair-do."

Sammy looked over to Meredith with hopeful eyes. "Can we, Aunt Meredith?"

Meredith, although she was hoping the girls had forgotten about "Project: Braid", simply smiled and nodded. "Sure, sweetie."

Nancy walked into the room holding a pot of mashed potatoes and looked to her daughter. "Sam, who did your hair?"

"Aunt Meredith," Sammy said, pointing to her. "Aren't they pretty?"

"They're very pretty," Nancy said, kissing the small girl after setting the food on the table. "Thanks, Meredith," she smiled genuinely. "That was really nice of you."

"Oh, sure," Meredith responded, taking a sip of her ice water. Nancy was the one she was the most worried about; if she was being friendly, maybe this wouldn't be so stressful.

More and more of the family filtered into the dining room, and Meredith was hoping she could survive it without rambling or spilling something on herself. Derek must have sensed her nerves because he brushed a soft kiss on her lips. "It's just dinner," he whispered.

"I know," Meredith nodded, kissing him again.

"Love you..." he whispered, wishing desperately that they were alone so he could kiss her the way he wanted to.

"Love you, too," she said. Meredith rested her forehead against his momentarily before pulling back. She didn't want the family to think they were going at it at the dining room table, especially while she held a month old baby.

Linda was the last to walk into the dining room behind her daughters and took her seat at the head of the table. "We're all hungry, so I'm not going to make a speech," Linda laughed. "But I just want you to know that I feel blessed to have all of you here, and that I love you all so much. Who wants to say grace?"

"I will, Mom-mom!" Sammy called out. All of the Shepherd family joined hands and listened to the five year old say the prayer before meals that she had most likely learned at school. Meredith smiled; her husband really did come from a close-knit family.

After the short prayer, everyone began passing around the many dishes scattered about the table. Coming from a small family, Meredith was shocked by how much food there was, but for everyone else, it was completely normal. Because she was holding the baby, Derek scooped food onto her plate for her. Amy looked over to her sister-in-law and smiled sympathetically. "Want me to take him, Meredith? I feel bad..."

Meredith shook her head. "Oh, it's fine. I don't mind holding him. He's so tiny, I still have a free hand," she smiled. "Unless you wanted to..."

"By all means, you can hold him. He seems to love you. Most of the time, he cries after being away from Tom or me for this long," Amy laughed.

"He's been holding onto Mer's shirt the whole time," Derek grinned, looking lovingly to his wife and their little nephew cradled in her arms.

"When can we expect a little one from you two?" Kathleen asked with a smile.

Linda looked to her oldest daughter and shook her head. "Kath, leave them alone. They're newlyweds."

"We're all wondering," Liz added in defense of her sister. "And that's going to be one beautiful child."

Meredith blushed slightly and bit her lip. She was half expecting this conversation anyway, but the fact that Derek's family seemed sincere, and was happy for her and Derek was a welcomed surprise. "Oh, I...we um..."

"Not...for a while," Derek answered for them. "Life is a little crazy right now between getting fully situated in the house and going to work, and we have Charlie, so we're good for now."

"But eventually?" Linda asked, her eyes hopeful.

Meredith smiled and nodded. "Eventually, yeah."

"Now we just need to get Mark married off," Amy said with a smile before taking a bite of chicken.

"Sweetheart, are you dating someone and didn't tell me?" Linda asked, refilling her granddaughter's juice cup.

Mark ran a hand over his face and groaned. Apparently, he had gotten asked this question dozens of times over the years. "Nope, I'm not."

"No one? Surely there's a nice doctor working at Seattle Grace. Oh, Nancy, what about your friend, the one who just started working there?" Linda suggested, her inherent need to mother making itself known.

"Oh, Michelle--Dr. Jensen, the OB attending. I went to med school with her. She's nice, Mark," Nancy agreed, taking a sip of iced tea.

Derek looked over to his friend and smirked. He really did feel sorry for him. Ever since high school, Derek's mom and sisters wanted to be informed of any girlfriend both Mark and Derek had, which made Derek thankful that he had Meredith, effectively ending the meddling.

"Yeah, maybe," Mark said quickly, shoveling some mashed potatoes into his mouth in vain hope that his dating life would no longer be the topic of discussion.

Meredith, being a good friend, stepped in. "Amy, do you want me to burp him?"

"Sure, Meredith. Thanks," Amy nodded. "He might do a little spitty-uppy, though."

"I'll go get you a burp cloth," Tom offered, leaving the room momentarily and returning with a little blue cloth for Meredith's shoulder.

"Thanks," Meredith smiled. She set the cloth on her shoulder before lifting Kyle into her arms and putting him against her chest. "There we go," she said softly, gently rubbing his back.

Linda looked to her daughter-in-law and smiled lovingly at her. There was no shred of doubt in her mind that Meredith was the love of her son's life. And seeing how she was so sweet and loving toward her grandson made her even more appreciative for her.

Eventually, the conversations branched off into small groups, and Meredith was thankful. She expected to be put through the ringer, and asked all sorts of questions that she probably wouldn't enjoy answering. After she was done burping Kyle, she switched the baby to her left arm so she could eat more freely. Kyle didn't mind at all being in Meredith's arms. He just looked around at what was going on, occasionally glancing across the table to make sure his mom and dad were there. But for the most part, he just sucked his thumb contentedly.

Meredith giggled at his little suckling sounds, and kissed the top of his head before taking a bite of her pasta. "Want me to hold him while you eat?" Derek asked.

"I'm good. We're bonding or whatever," Meredith said while chewing. "I might give him to you after dinner though. I promised some of the girls I'd do their hair like Sammy's."

"Okay," Derek laughed softly. "You're quite the hit with the kids. How'd you learn how to do French braids anyway?"

"Taught myself when I was ten or eleven," Meredith shrugged. "I was bored one day."

"Very impressive," Derek nodded, stealing a bite of potato salad off her plate. Meredith looked to her husband and smirked. "You steal my food all the time," he laughed. "Besides, the bowl is on the other side of the table. By the time they passed it down here, it'd be morning."

Meredith giggled. "I don't mind. I think it's cute. You're always welcome to share with me," she pointed out. "As long as I get to share with you..." She took a bite of his biscuit then set back down on his plate.

"Fine with me," he grinned, noticing how yawned slightly. "Tired?"

"A little," Meredith confessed. "That bed up in your room sounds pretty good right now."

Derek nonchalantly dropped his napkin onto the floor, and as he bent over in his chair, whispered "What happened to taking my bedroom virginity?"

Meredith couldn't stifle the laugh that passed her lips, kissing Derek's cheek as he sat back up. "Family dinner," she reminded him. "Inappropriate."

Kyle kicked the bootie halfway off his foot and Derek went to put it back on it so Meredith could keep eating. "Just a question," he pressed, fixing the knitted blue sock.

"We'll see," Meredith said noncommittally. Truth be told, she was a little horny, probably from sitting on the plane all day and having nothing better to do than think about what she and Derek could be doing if they were at home, which was basically having sex. But the flight had also tired her out. "It depends on how convincing you are..."

"I'm convincing. I'm always convincing," Derek grinned, the playful arrogance clearly evident in his voice.

"You two are lucky it's me sitting next to you," Mark interrupted. "I'm an inch away from Grey. I can hear things."

Meredith bit her lip, feeling the redness build in her cheeks. Mark was like a big brother to her, not someone she wanted hearing their sex conversation at the dinner table. "Good thing you won't say anything then," Derek shot back jokingly.

"Whose room are you staying in, Mark?" Meredith asked, effectively changing the subject. Talking about her and Derek's sexcapades wasn't exactly something she wanted the other members of the family getting wind of.

Mark took a sip of his soda. "The guestroom way down the hall from yours. Thank God. I'm exhausted and would rather not hear...it," he winced.

"What are you guys talking about?" Sammy asked innocently as the five year old hopped out of her seat and planted herself on her Uncle Derek's lap.

"Unicorns," Mark answered quickly, causing Meredith to giggle.

Sammy laughed. "You're silly, Uncle Mark. Unicorns aren't real..."

"What? No one told me," he replied, pretending to be surprised.

"It's true," Sammy nodded. "Aunt Meredith, after we do your hair, can we play _Pretty Pretty Princess_?"

Meredith had no idea just how much her new little nieces would enjoy playing with her. It was nice having a family. She hoped now that Molly, Eric, and Laura were moving closer, Laura would look up to her one day, too. "Sure, hun. After I help clean up, we can play, okay?"

"Okay," Sammy said happily, kissing Derek's cheek before climbing down off his lap and running into the living room with her cousins.

"I never pegged you for a _Pretty Pretty Princess_ kind of girl," Derek chuckled.

She swatted his arm playfully. "I should tell them that Uncle Derek wants to join in, too. I'm sure they'd let you," she retorted.

"I've played that game a thousand times. It's fun. You'll like it," he assured her.

Mark gave his friend a supportive pat on the shoulder. "The Black Ring is bad. Keep that in mind," he told her. "If you have the black ring, you can't get any more jewelry until someone else lands on it."

"You seem to know a lot about it, Mark," Meredith teased, balancing the baby in her arms as she sipped her water.

"We take our uncle roles very seriously," Derek chuckled. He thought back to the days in college when he and Mark were recruited as babysitters when they came home for Christmas or spring break. They spent nearly every day playing board games and Barbies with the kids. "Oh, and _never_ put the crown back. The crown is the most important piece."

Meredith eyed the two suspiciously. They were world class surgeons. The image of them wearing clip-on earrings and sporting princess crowns was almost too much to handle. "Got it, thanks."

--

The remainder of the evening was spent with the Shepherd family, people scattered about the house. In the kitchen filing in and out for desserts. In the den watching television. Or in the living room for games of _Go Fish_ and _Pretty Pretty Princess_, and more beauty salon. By the time three of Derek's sisters and their families said their goodbyes for the evening, it was nearing eleven o'clock, and Meredith couldn't wait to curl up in bed with her husband. She had to admit, she enjoyed the family time. Hanging out with their nieces was a blast, even if her hair had been braided to the maximum, and she had to wear plastic green jewelry for over an hour. She was thankful for it--thankful to all of them for making her feel so welcomed.

"I'm exhausted," Meredith giggled through her yawn as she stepped out of the bathroom attached to Derek's bedroom--one of the perks of being the only son. Having four sisters constantly hogging the bathroom caused his parents to build him his own, which Meredith certainly appreciated right now.

Derek laid the high school yearbook he found on the shelf down on his lap and smiled at his wife. "Me too," he chuckled.

Meredith ran her fingers through her wet hair and smirked at him. "Yeah, well, my hair is going to be a frizzy mess tomorrow. I'm surprised I got all the braids out," she teased. As she rummaged through her suitcase for some sweats to wear to bed, she let her bath towel drop to the floor. Derek grinned; Meredith had no qualms about nudity in front of him. And he loved her even more for it.

"Are you trying to be cruel?" Derek joked, forgetting all about his high school yearbook so he could admire his wife's curves.

"What?" she asked as she turned her head to look at him. Quickly reminded of her nakedness, Meredith laughed. "Oh. Yeah. Not happening tonight," she said, grabbing a pair of panties from her suitcase.

Derek watched as she pulled the frilly pink panties up her long legs, the elastic band hugging low on her hips and molding to her body. "Not even if I can convince you?" he asked with a cocky grin. "Because I'm very good at that."

"Your room has lock, right?" Meredith asked, remembering what he had told her earlier in the day. She pulled on some sweats and a long sleeve shirt before walking over the bed and crawling in next to him.

"Yeah..." he replied. "Why?"

Meredith shimmied closer next to him under the covers and ran her fingers through his hair, which was still slightly damp from his own shower. "We like long, slow morning sex...when it's like a cocoon...all warm and dark and quiet..." she said with a smile that he couldn't help but return.

"Quiet?" Derek asked, raising his eyebrows and smirking.

"Well, it starts out quiet. By the end, not so much," she giggled. "You should take that as a compliment."

"So should you," he pointed out. Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. "I love you, Meredith."

Meredith leaned into him and smiled. "I love you, too," she whispered, lacing her fingers with his. "So what's on the agenda for tomorrow?"

"Well, we're sleeping in," he grinned. "We haven't done that in a while."

"Since the honeymoon..." Meredith giggled, rolling her eyes. "It feels like we haven't slept past six since then." Since entering her third year of residency, she had moved up on the surgical food chain of course, but the workload had since been doubled. And having an active puppy at home who enjoyed spending his nights in their bed, and waking up at the crack of dawn to go outside wasn't exactly allowing them much more sleep.

Derek combed his fingers through her wet waves of hair and nodded. "That's because he haven't," he laughed. "That's what this trip is for...sleeping in, sex, good food..."

"You make this place sound like a bed and breakfast," Meredith teased, reaching her arm over to the nightstand. "Crap. I forgot this isn't our room," she giggled, flinging the blanket off herself and walking over to her bag next to their suitcases. After retrieving her lotion, Meredith rejoined him in bed. "So what are we doing tomorrow? We got off track."

"We can do anything you want...go shopping, go out to eat. Doesn't matter to me," Derek replied with a shrug.

Meredith pushed up her pant legs and squirted some of the lightly scented lotion into her palm. "Your mom doesn't care?" she asked, smoothing the lotion onto her legs thoroughly before massaging the excess into her hands.

Derek shook his head as he breathed in the scent of the lavender lotion that he had come to identify as uniquely her. "No, she's not too strict," he teased, resulting in a playful nudge from Meredith. "All of the kids are on fall break, so if my sisters or their husbands are working, they'll probably drop the kids off over here. Nancy and John are staying here though, so they'll be able to help out. You and I can probably sneak away," he grinned.

"You don't want to watch the kids? So mean..." she scolded jokingly.

"It's Wednesday night. We're here until Sunday. We have plenty of time to do that," Derek laughed.

Meredith set the lotion on the nightstand and noticed the yearbook in Derek's lap. "Your high school yearbook!" she gasped, sliding it over to her own lap. "I want to see this."

"This is my senior year one. Probably the least embarrassing," he said with a chuckle as Meredith flipped through it in search of his photo.

"I want to see the others eventually, too," she giggled. When she spotted his picture, Meredith practically squealed. "Derek! You're so handsome in this picture!"

Derek just laughed, surprised that she wasn't making fun of him. "Recognize the guy on my right?" he asked.

Meredith studied the page for a moment before gasping. "Mark! Oh, you two are so cute," she said, smoothing out the glossy page with her hand.

"I think he dated every girl on this page," Derek said amusedly. "Homeroom was fun that year."

"Any of your girlfriends in here?" Meredith hinted, scanning the pages for hearts or love notes written on any pictures.

Derek shook his head, smirking. "How did I know you were going to ask that?" he asked rhetorically.

"Aah, so they _are_ in here..." Meredith deduced. "Well, show me."

He knew there wasn't much chance getting out of it, so Derek began flipping through to find one of the few girls he dated in high school. After finding one, he pointed her out. "Tiffany Davidson. We dated for a month or two. Satisfied?" he asked with an amused grin.

Meredith looked the girl over for a moment. "She's cute. The perm is a bit much though..." she giggled.

"You never had a perm?" Derek asked. "I thought all girls had perms at that age."

"I had more of the teased hair look. Not really curls, just...big," she explained. "I have pictures."

"I look forward to seeing them," he replied, kissing the crown of her hair and giving her a gentle side hug.

Meredith laughed. "You want to see all of my old boyfriends?"

"How many of them are there?" Derek asked playfully.

"Uh...in high school? Probably like ten-ish," Meredith said plainly as she searched the yearbook for any more pictures of her husband.

"Ten? Someone was popular..." he teased.

Meredith giggled when she saw a picture of Derek in his marching band uniform. "Popular? Not exactly. By the way, I like your band uniform," she laughed heartily.

"I'm guessing you weren't in the band?" he guessed knowingly. Derek couldn't imagine Meredith partaking in anything that boosted school spirit. It just wasn't her thing.

"Pssh...no. I wasn't in any clubs. But I was in the Honor Society," Meredith said, faking arrogance. "I ranked third in a class of four hundred."

Derek's eyes grew wide in astonishment. "Seriously?"

"What? Are you surprised that I was a good student?" she questioned teasingly.

"No, you're brilliant. I've known that since the day we met. It's just that I graduated third too," Derek grinned. "Danny Ferris beat me for salutatorian. I hated that kid..."

"Aw, still bitter?" she asked in mock pity. "I didn't want to be second. There was no way in hell I was giving a speech..."

Derek smiled. "I'm sure you would have kicked ass."

Meredith closed the yearbook and placed it gently on the nightstand before kissing Derek's cheek. "Thanks."

"Ready for bed?" Derek asked, noticing the tiredness in her eyes.

"Uh huh," Meredith yawned. She and Derek laid down in the bed, and Meredith laughed when she noticed one of the pillowcases.

Derek looked at her curiously after turning off the lamp on the nightstand. "What?"

"The _Spiderman_ pillowcase...it's adorable," Meredith smiled playfully, laying her head next to his and running her fingers through his hair.

"I guess my mom used everything else for Mark, Nance, John and their kids," Derek laughed. "I used this when I was five."

Meredith leaned in and kissed him softly. "It's sweet. As long as the sheets aren't covered with _Sesame Street_ characters...I don't think I could have sex with you in this bed if Elmo and Big Bird were staring at me."

"Me either," Derek said in agreement. He wrapped his arm around her like he always did when they slept and Meredith smiled sweetly.

"Do you think Charlie is okay?" she asked, trailing her hand from his hair down his spine so she could rub his back. They both enjoyed intimate moments like this, just being together without the pressures of work and every day life. There was something so relaxing about just lying in bed with the person you love, and they knew the feeling would never falter.

Derek nodded. "I'm sure he's fine...probably making himself comfy on a couch or a bed. We've spoiled him beyond repair," he chuckled.

"He's our baby boy. How can we not spoil him?" Meredith asked with a giggle. "I want to call home tomorrow so we can talk to him."

"Okay," Derek smiled. To anyone else, that may have sounded a little strange, but Meredith loved their dog so much. Derek was surprised she didn't insist on bringing Charlie with them to New York.

"I want him to hear our voices. But I know Alex and Iz are taking good care of him. She's probably baking dog treats or knitting him a doggy sweaters," Meredith giggled.

"I'm sure she is," Derek said, echoing her laugh. "Not sure how Karev feels about him hopping into bed."

Meredith smirked. "Charlie is sort of cockblock-y..."

"Sex in the laundry room is fun though..." he grinned naughtily.

"It was," Meredith sighed, unwittingly moaning at the memory. "We need to do that again..."

Derek gave his wife a gentle squeeze and kissed her forehead. "We will."

"Hmm...okay," she smiled tiredly, her eyelids slowly succumbing to her sleepiness. "Love you, Derek."

"I love you, too," Derek whispered, happy to be back in his childhood home surrounded by his family. And of course, having the love of his life there to share it with him made it perfect.

**Hope you liked it! Reviews make my day. :)**


	50. Time with the Nieces

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, Meredith would wear her engagement ring. (Come on, Shonda. What the hell?) And they would totally get married naked in a field of flowers. **

**Thanks to all that review. I really appreciate it!**

The sun peeking in through the curtains in Derek's bedroom was certainly a big change from the dark, dreary days in Seattle. Meredith could see the light through the backs of her eyelids, and she woke sleepily with a smile. Getting to sleep late in the mornings was a rare treat, and she welcomed each opportunity. It was cozy under the covers; she would happily lie here all day with Derek. Meredith snuggled closer to him under their cocoon of warmth and blankets. Derek was still sleeping, so rather than wake him, she just enjoyed the peaceful silence. She eventually drifted back to sleep for a while, but woke up when she felt Derek pressing soft kisses to her neck.

"Hmm..." she sighed tiredly, but still managing a smile.

Derek pulled her closer to him. "Morning," he whispered.

"Morning," Meredith yawned, her body slowly breaking into goosebumps thanks to Derek's affections.

"How'd you sleep?" he asked, rolling on top of her.

Meredith knew he wanted sex, but decided to tease him a bit. "I'll let you know when I wake up..."

"You're awake now," Derek laughed against her skin as he kissed along her collarbone.

As she laid beneath him, Meredith could feel his erection pressing against her stomach. "Apparently...so are you," she quipped, keeping her eyes closed.

Derek grinned, running his hands along her sides. He lifted up her shirt a little and began kissing her stomach. Meredith sighed contentedly, letting her husband pay attention to her body. "I am...and I want to make love to you."

She bit her lip in an attempt to stifle a moan when he cupped her breasts in his hands, but was unsuccessful. "Derek..." she sighed, arching her back.

"Hmm..." Derek replied smugly. He pulled her shirt over her head before taking off his own. Thanks to the warmth under the blanket, Meredith didn't feel the cold air; instead, she felt herself heating up and was anxious for more. She pulled him down to her and kissed him hard. Her breasts pressed into his chest, making Derek groan. "Mer..."

Meredith trailed her hands down his bare back. "Naked," she breathed, as though it were an order. Using her legs she managed to kick the sweats and boxers off of him, leaving him naked above her. "You...condom."

Derek reluctantly got up out of bed and rummaged through the bag until he found one, then rejoined her under the covers. He hooked his fingers through her pants and panties. Meredith lifted up a bit so he could slide her clothing down her legs and Derek complied. "We're taking this slow," Derek said thickly as he planted tiny kisses on her thighs.

A small sigh escaped from Meredith's throat. "How slow?" she asked, running her fingers through his hair.

"Very slow..." he replied. Derek kissed up her body, from her thighs to her stomach and to her breasts before kissing her again. Meredith snaked her tongue into his mouth and moaned in pleasure. But still, she wanted more. She slid her hand down between them and started rubbing the small bundle of nerves between her thighs in an effort to relieve the growing pressure there.

Meredith gasped a little when he pulled her hand away, replacing it with his own. All of her efforts to keep him waiting failed, considering he'd gotten her naked and panting in a matter of mere minutes, so she simply let him do whatever he pleased, even though she thought the pleasure might kill her.

--

"Holy crap," Meredith panted, her voice shaky and scratchy. Sweat covered both of their bodies. They always gave one hundred percent with sex, and it never ceased to wear them out.

Derek held himself above her with wobbly arms. "I...wow," he breathed.

Meredith noticed how unsteady he looked, so she pulled him down. "It's okay," she whispered. "You won't crush me."

"Okay," Derek said, managing to laugh through his lack of breath. He rested his head on her chest and Meredith ran her fingers through his hair like she often did after sex. "I love you, Meredith."

"I love you, too." She felt him withdraw from her and he pulled her into his arms. "You don't think we..." Meredith asked nervously.

Derek shook his head. "We were quiet. And slow..."

"Very slow," Meredith agreed. "I thought I might die."

"Me too," he chuckled, brushing some hair off her face. "That was amazing, though."

Meredith smiled contentedly. "It was."

"I never want to get up," Derek joked. Being wrapped in each others arms as their heartbeats steadied and their breath returned always felt so safe and perfect. "Can we just lie here all day?"

"Hmm...fine with me," she giggled softly, tangling her fingers in his dark curls. "But I think everyone would get suspicious."

Derek let out a sigh. "Yeah, probably." He extended himself on his elbow to check the digital clock on the nightstand. "It's ten o'clock. My mom might even be downstairs making breakfast."

"We slept late," Meredith said as she stretched her body, attempting to rid herself of whatever sleepiness remained. "Oh, I want to call home before Alex and Iz leave for work." She leaned over Derek and retrieved his cell phone. As she dialed, Meredith hoped they hadn't left yet. "Alex! Hey, it's Mer."

"Hey. How's New York?" Alex asked.

Meredith smiled. "It's great. We're having fun," she said, resulting in a naughty smirk from Derek, who was tracing lazy patterns over her stomach.

"Good," Alex said with a nod. He kissed Izzie's cheek when she walked into the kitchen holding Charlie in her arms. "Let me guess...you want to talk to the dog?"

"Oh, is that Mer?" Izzie interrupted. "Give me the phone." Alex handed the cordless off to her and retrieved his Pop-Tart from the toaster. "Hey. How are you guys?"

Meredith swatted Derek's hand away as they grew dangerously closer to her breasts. Talking to her friend while her husband was feeling her up was wrong on so many levels. "Oh, we're good. Yeah, we're having fun. Everyone is so nice."

"Oh good," Izzie said sincerely. "I'm holding your little guy now. He's such a good dog--kind of a bed hog. Like..._really_ hogs it. Still a sweetie though. Do you want to talk to him?" she asked finally.

Meredith giggled a little at her friend's rambling. It seems it rubbed off on everyone she knew. "I know it's stupid, but I miss him so..."

"It's fine," Izzie said with a smile. "I'll...hold the phone up to him, I guess."

"Hi Charlie. It's Mommy," Meredith said with a smile, which only grew upon hearing the puppy bark excitedly when he recognized her voice. "And Daddy..."

Derek laughed when Meredith handed him the phone. "Hey Charlie."

"We just wanted to let you know that we're coming back for you--not that Alex and Izzie are doing a bad job. But we miss you. Be good, okay? We love you, Charlie," Meredith said sweetly. She would have gladly talked to the dog for longer, but knew her friends had to get to the hospital. "Bye, sweetie."

After Meredith said her goodbyes to her friends, Derek tossed the cell phone onto nightstand and rolled on top of his wife. "You," he said, kissing her. "Are adorable."

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Hmm...why?"

"Because," he replied, running his hands over her sides. "You are."

"Okay then," Meredith said with a roll of her eyes. She lifted her head to kiss him quickly before moving to get out of the bed.

As she padded around the room for the clothes that had been discarded before their morning romp, Derek cocked his head slightly. "What happened to staying in bed all day?" he asked, admiring her naked body before she pulled her clothes back on.

"I feel bad...if your mom is downstairs cooking breakfast, I should at least attempt to make myself useful, even if it's just making toast," she explained, tossing Derek his clothes.

Derek gave her a small smirk, but conceded. He pulled on his boxers and sweats, then looked to her playfully. "Think we'd get away with nap time?"

"For ourselves?" she aksed. "Probably not..."

"We could use jetlag as an excuse," Derek continued on. Obviously, his focus was on getting her back into bed as soon as he could. And as much as Meredith hated to protest it, she knew they should spend time with the family.

"Hmm...maybe," Meredith said noncommittally. "Now put your shirt on."

Derek slipped his _Clash_ tee shirt over his head and hopped out of bed. "I need to pee."

"Me too," she replied as she ran a brush through her sex hair. There was no way she was going downstairs looking like she'd just had sex with Derek in his childhood bedroom. Somehow, that felt like a bad conversation to have over breakfast. "Hurry up," Meredith whined, knocking her finger on the attached bathroom door. "I really have to go."

He opened the door and smiled amusedly at her. "I was in there for thirty seconds, jeez..."

"Yeah, and I hope you put the seat down," Meredith said, combing her fingers quickly through his hair to smooth out some of the wild curls.

"I always put the seat down--and flush. That's more than most guys do. You're lucky to have me..." Derek boasted jokingly. He leaned against the wall with his arms over his chest while he waited for her.

"Prince Charming," Meredith giggled from behind the closed door. "Don't go down without me."

Derek smiled to himself. He knew she was just having new family jitters, but the fact that she wanted him near her still made his heart sing a little. "I'm right here."

She emerged from the bathroom a minute or so later and found Derek leaning against the adjacent wall. "Ready?" Meredith asked, extending her hand.

"Yep." Derek threaded his fingers with her own and the exited the bedroom. As they walked down the stairs, they could hear small children laughing and _Spongebob's _voice coming from the television. It was so homey here, and Meredith knew why Derek is the warm, compassionate person he is.

"Good morning, you two," Linda greeted them as she simultaneously held Kyle over her shoulder and gathered the little kids into the kitchen. "You're just in time for breakfast. Nancy and John are setting out the food."

Meredith bit her lip, feeling a little guilty. "Oh I...you could have woken us up. We would have helped," she said meekly.

Linda smiled at her daughter-in-law. "Oh sweetheart, you two flew here from across the country. You had to be exhausted. Besides, this is your vacation. And John is a chef, so he was happy to do it," she said with a laugh. "Come on, let's go in the kitchen before Mark eats it all..."

"So you have babysitting duty?" Derek asked. They walked into the kitchen, inhaling the scent of bacon, eggs, pancakes, and other breakfast foods they rarely ate due to the get-up-and-go routine of their jobs. Sitting down for breakfast was definitely a welcomed treat.

"The girls and their husbands had to go to work for a while. But everyone will be back later on today. Luckily, I have some grown-ups here to entertain them," Linda said. She kissed her grandson's head and gestured to the table. "Go ahead and take your seats."

"Does anybody want to feed him?" Linda asked, referring to Kyle, who was contentedly sucking his thumb while propped over his grandma's shoulder.

"I will," Nancy offered.

After Linda handed the infant to her daughter, Meredith couldn't help but watch Nancy with her nephew. East coast Nancy seemed far more friendly than west coast Nancy. Of course, Meredith knew she was just looking out for her brother, but still felt a little disappointed by their less than pleasant introduction. But now, after seeing Nancy interact with her own children as well as her nieces and nephews, she began to see the woman in a different light--not that they'd ever be best friends, but maybe over time, good sisters-in-law.

"Aunt Meredith, can we do something fun today?" Sammy asked, obviously growing attached to her aunt.

Meredith took a sip of her orange juice and smiled at the little girl. "Sure, sweetie. As long as it's okay with your mom and dad, and your grandma..."

Sammy's eyes brightened and she looked to her mother, hoping for the answer she wanted to hear. "Can we, Mommy?" she asked excitedly. The other little girls seated around the table also looked to her with expectant smiles.

"It's fine with me, as long as it's not too much trouble," Nancy explained, giving her daughter a soft smile. "The kids can be a handful sometimes..." she said to Meredith and Derek as she fed Kyle.

Derek laughed. "I used to babysit all the time when I lived here. I think I can handle it."

"Okay then," Nancy shrugged, smirking slightly at her brother's naivety. Taking care of a a few kids in the confines of a house was one thing, but taking a bunch of little girls out for the day was another. It's not that she didn't trust Derek and Meredith, she just knew they'd come home with a few gray hairs by the end of the day.

"So we can?" Morgan asked, her little face and hands covered in pancake syrup.

"Sure, Princess," Derek said with a grin. "Where do you guys want to go?"

"You can come, Mark," Meredith offered, taking a bite of her omelet. She could easily get used to this sit down breakfast thing. All of the food was amazing. Clearly, being a member of the Shepherd family had its benefits.

Mark let out a laugh, nearly choking on his bacon. "No, I'll hang back here. You guys go...have fun," he said as he took a sip of coffee to clear his throat. "I already promised the boys I'd help them beat their video game anyway."

Mark's response stirred up a small panic in Meredith. Surely taking a few little girls out for the day couldn't be so hard, right? She decided to push those thoughts to the back of her mind. If Derek wasn't nervous, she wasn't going to be either.

"Can we go to the circus?" Carly asked, playing with the sleeves of her _Dora the Explorer_ nightgown.

"I don't think the circus is in town, hun," Derek chuckled.

Meredith took a sip of her coffee from the flowery mug, letting the caffeine run through her veins. Somehow, she knew she'd need her energy today. But watching Derek interact with his little nieces warmed her more than the steaming beverage. It was moments like these that made her realize how lucky she was to have Derek in her life.

"How about you girls go the apple orchard and pick me some nice, fresh ones I can use in my pie?" Linda suggested, looking lovingly to her granddaughters scattered about the breakfast table.

"Okay!" Audrey nodded enthusiastically. She looked to her aunt and uncle. "Can we?" she asked.

Meredith smiled at the brown haired girl with blue eyes just like her uncle's. All of the Shepherds really did look alike, she noticed. "That's fine with me."

"Sounds good," Derek agreed. He finished off his waffle, washing it down with a sip of his orange juice before looking to his mother. "Is there an apple orchard nearby, or do I have to drive three hundred miles?" he asked jokingly.

"You'd drive three hundred miles for the girls," Mark laughed. Meredith giggled, knowing it was the truth. Even though Derek hadn't seen his nieces and nephews in a while, they still adored him.

"Remember Shady Maple, where we took you kids when you were little? It's only twenty minutes from here," Linda explained as Nancy handed Kyle to her so she could burp him.

Morgan crawled into Derek's lap and smiled up at him. "When can we go?" she asked in her three year old voice.

"In a little bit. We all need to get dressed and ready, then we'll go sweetie," Derek grinned, tickling her sides. The little girl's laughter filled the room and everyone around the table smiled. Meredith squeezed her husband's thigh gently. He looked over to her and kissed her temple. She really could get used to this family thing.

--

Meredith rummaged through their suitcase, looking for an appropriate outfit to wear to an apple orchard. She'd never been to one, so she really didn't know what the appropriate dress was. "Derek!" she called, her voice making its way into the bathroom.

"Yeah?" he asked, gliding some deodorant under his arms before pulling on a tee shirt. Meredith bit her lip and admired his naked upper half for a moment before speaking. Part of her wished the bottom half was naked too, but this would suffice for now.

"What do I wear?" Meredith asked hastily, hands on her hips. The fact that she was barely covered besides her bra and panties certainly wasn't a motivator for Derek to put his own shirt on. If he hadn't promised his nieces that they'd be ready in an hour, they'd already be having sex again.

Derek swallowed hard, keeping his eyes on her own. "Jeans, a sweater...nothing fancy," he shrugged. "It's a little cold, so you'll probably want to bring a jacket too."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She pulled on her jeans, zipped, and buttoned them. After pulling on a camisole and a cranberry colored sweater, she looked herself over in the mirror. Satisfied with her choice, she took the brush from the nightstand and smoothed it through her waves.

Derek smirked. "I brought a red sweater too. I bet we'd look cute if we matched," he said, trying his best to keep a straight face.

Meredith noticed the beginnings of a grin on his face in the reflection of the mirror. "Oh, yeah right," she laughed, spinning on her socked feet to face her husband. "We are _not_ dressing like twins..."

"You're cute when you snap at me," Derek smiled. He grabbed a brown sweater from his suitcase and quickly pulled it over his head. When he wrapped his arms around Meredith, she immediately melted into him, breathing in his scent.

"I'm not snapping," she said, running her fingers through his hair. "A little scared, but not snapping."

He kissed her forehead, letting his lips linger on her skin longer than usual. "Oh, it'll be fun," Derek said reassuringly. "We get to go in Nancy's mom van and listen to _Hannah Montana_...what's scary about that?"

"Okay, now I'm just nauseous," Meredith giggled. "You're sure you want to do the whole kid thing with me?"

"Yes," Derek chuckled softly. "I want to do the whole kid thing with you."

Meredith kissed his jaw line. His stubble prickled her her lips but she just smiled; that was Derek to her. "Even if they're crappy?"

"They'll be anything but crappy. They're going to be perfect," Derek grinned proudly. "And obviously geniuses."

"Geniuses with split ends," Meredith corrected, glancing over at the clock to make sure they weren't keeping the little girls waiting downstairs.

An bigger smile came over Derek's face and he pulled her closer. "Even better."

The pitter-patter of feet were heard running around downstairs in the living room, and Meredith pulled back a little from their hug. "We should probably get going soon. I don't want to keep them wondering where we are."

Derek kissed her, savoring the feeling of his lips on hers. He didn't know the next time they'd be able to share a kiss like this, so he figured he'd make it count. "Hmm...we're going to bed early tonight," he said between kisses.

"Why?"

"Because," Derek answered, "I'm going to be horny..."

Meredith giggled. Her husband could be half asleep, and still insatiable. She ran her hands down his back and eventually settled her hands in the back pockets of his jeans. "Yeah?"

"Is today a day?" Derek asked rhetorically. He scooped her up in his arms and Meredith gasped, but wrapped her legs around his waist.

"Last I checked, it was," Meredith played along. Just as she was about to grind herself against his body, she thought better of it. That would no doubt lead to sex, and right now, they didn't have time for that.

"Well then, I'd say it's kind of guaranteed." Derek gave her one last kiss and set her back on her feet.

As they were putting on their shoes, a small knock came from the other side of the bedroom door. "Come in," Derek called.

Sammy walked into the room, all dressed and ready to go. "Are we going soon?" she asked them excitedly.

Meredith smiled at the little girl. "Yep, we're coming down right now, sweetie," she replied.

"Can I have a piggy back ride?" Sammy asked her uncle sweetly. Meredith watched as Derek knelt down and the child wrapped her arms around his neck. He really would make a beautiful father one day, and Meredith smiled at the thought.

The three of them walked downstairs to find Audrey, Morgan, and Carly all ready to go with their jackets on. Derek let Sammy down and Nancy helped her put on her own. When she handed Derek the keys to the minivan, she smiled. "If you take them somewhere to eat, keep the sugar to a minimum. Because if they're bouncing off the walls when you bet back, I'm making you deal with them," Nancy teased her brother. "Go, have fun."

Derek laughed, giving his older sister a smirk. "You're still as bossy as you were when we were little. Don't worry, Mer and I have it under control," he said. "Did everyone go to the bathroom?"

"Yes," the little girls nodded in unison. "Can we go now?" Audrey asked.

"Yeah, let's go," Derek smiled, opening the front door and letting the four little girls file out ahead of him and Meredith. "Ready to play parents?" he asked, grinning.

Meredith rolled her eyes at his ability to be corny in nearly every situation. "Sure."

When they reached the minivan, they made sure each girl was buckled safely into her seat before taking their own up front. Meredith and Derek barely shut the doors when a music request came from the backseat. "Aunt Meredith, can you put on _Hannah Montana_?"

Derek looked at over her and smirked. "Did I call that or what?" he laughed.

"Is it already in the CD player?" Meredith asked them, searching the glove compartment in search of it.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Mommy and Daddy didn't take it out when we got here."

Meredith pushed the play button and the music filled the car. It wasn't what either she or Derek would prefer, but they could bear it for a half hour or so. "Better than the _Clash_?" Derek asked sarcastically.

Meredith laughed. "It's not that bad...kind of catchy."

"You want me to burn you a copy?"

"No I'll pass, thanks," she replied teasingly.

"Aunt Meredith, do you watch _Hannah Montana_?" one of their nieces asked from her place in the backseat.

Derek glanced over at her quickly and gave her a tiny smirk, waiting to see how she answered them. "I wish I had time to. Uncle Derek and I are always working. Is it a good show?"

"Mmhmm," Morgan, the three year old, said as she sipped on her juicebox. "'S funny."

"Uncle Derek, I have to go pee," Sammy called out from the back.

Derek shook his head and smiled. He loved his nieces, but they were a handful sometimes. "We'll be there in ten minutes, Sam. Can you hold it?" he asked, glancing in the rear view mirror.

She dropped her head back against her seat and sighed. "I'll do my best."

"Aren't girls fun?" Meredith asked with a giggle. She reached behind her and handed Morgan the doll she had dropped on the floor of the car. "There you go, sweetie."

"Tank you," Morgan smiled, hugging it close to her.

Derek was amazed at how comfortable Meredith was with their nieces after only having met them yesterday. "They _are_ fun. But you...you win the prize," he grinned.

"And why is that?"

"Because," Derek began, but when he went to speak, he stopped himself. "I'll let you know later. It would be inappropriate."

Meredith rolled her eyes and smacked his arm gently. "Derek," she hissed. "G-rated today."

"Fine. Today. But tonight, you're all mine," he said in a low enough voice so the girls wouldn't hear their conversation, although the music seemed to be keeping them pretty occupied.

"Tomorrow is the big football game. I need to let you rest up," she teased.

"If I'm playing, so are you," Derek informed her. He stopped at the red light and glanced over to her, seeing what her reaction to the news would be.

Meredith shook her head adamantly. "No, I'm not," she said in her best serious voice. "No hand-eye coordination, remember? I'd be the reason my team lost. You're blood related, you have to play."

"You seriously won't play? Even if I beg?" he asked.

"I'm immune to your begging, Derek," Meredith sighed, smoothing out the sleeves of her sweater. "Not gonna work."

Derek smirked. "Evil." He pulled into the parking lot, inwardly thankful that there hadn't been too much traffic. The music was starting to get stuck in his head, and he couldn't let that happen. "Okay, we're here. Everybody out. Hold hands so you don't get lost. Morgan, I'll come get you," he smiled to the little one sitting in her car-seat.

"I got her," Meredith offered, who was sitting on the same side of the car. She got out of the passenger seat, stepped into the backseat, and retrieved the three year old from her car-seat. "There you go, hun," she giggled, setting the girl on her feet.

"Hand," Morgan said, reaching up and curling her fingers around Meredith's.

"Right," Meredith nodded. She gave the girl's hand a little squeeze, smiling at how trusting she was of her.

Derek smiled a little at the sight. "Okay, everybody ready?" he asked.

"Yep," Carly said, speaking for the rest of the girls.

After paying the small admission fee for the six of them, Derek wheeled over the wagon they'd brought with them and filled it with a few baskets for the apples. "Ready to go pick apples, girls?" he asked in his best excited voice.

"I have to pee, Uncle Derek," Sammy reminded him, hopping up and down a little.

"Oh, right. Okay, anybody else have to pee?" Derek asked the others. The little girls shook their heads and he looked to Meredith. "Would you mind...?"

Meredith smiled. "No, it's fine. Come on, Sam. I'll take you." Sammy took hold of Meredith's other hand, anxious to get to the bathroom. "Morgan, do you want to stay with Uncle Derek or come with me?"

"Come with you," Morgan said, pointing to her aunt.

After the three of them were on their way to the nearby restroom, Audrey smiled to Derek. "I like her, Uncle Derek."

"Aunt Mer?"

Audrey and Carly nodded. "She's really nice. And she's fun too."

"She's pretty," Carly giggled.

Derek knew that his nieces were only six, but still, the fact that they, too, welcomed Meredith into the family made him smile. Everyone in the family made her feel at home, actually, and he was thankful, especially given Meredith's uneasiness when it comes to family approval. "I think so, too," Derek grinned.

"Can you _please_ have a baby soon?" Audrey asked, her voice sounding exasperated, as though she'd asked the question many times before without any success.

Derek laughed out loud. "We're going to, I promise."

"How soon?" Carly asked persistently.

"Well, uh..." Derek stalled. How does one explain family planning to six year olds? "Aunt Mer and I...we work almost every day for long hours. So before we have a baby, we want to make sure we can be home enough to take care of him or her."

"But you will one day, right?" Audrey asked.

Derek nodded, giving his niece a smile. "Yep. Definitely."

"Will you let us babysit?"

"Sure, girls," Derek laughed.

Meredith rejoined the group with each girl holding one of her hands. "We're back. Sorry, there was a line."

"It's fine." Derek kissed her cheek while the girls ran ahead toward one of the long lines of orchards. Meredith smiled and took his hand. She had never been a fan of family time, but this was actually fun. "Carly and Audrey were grilling me on when you and I were having a baby..." he said with a chuckle.

She raised her eyes to meet his, a smile tugging on the corners of her mouth. "And what did you tell them?"

"I told them yes, but not right now," he said, snaking an arm around her waist. Meredith leaned into him so she could absorb the heat radiating from his body. "You're a hit, by the way. They told me how much they like you--and how pretty you are."

"They said that?" Meredith asked. She and Derek handed the girls a basket so they could start collecting apples off the small trees that lined the rows of the orchard, while the two of them just enjoyed the time they were spending outdoors. It reminded them of back home, taking walks with Charlie together out on the land, just like they used to do with Doc.

Derek kissed the crown of her head. "Yeah, they did. You're a good aunt, Meredith. Of course, Laura could have told you that," he grinned.

Meredith giggled softly. "I miss her," she sighed. "Now that Molly and Eric live closer, we should watch her...just for the day or something. Take her somewhere or bring her to the house. Her birthday is in a few months, maybe we could do something then," Meredith suggested, sidestepping a rotted apple lying in the grass.

"I'd love to," Derek whispered, pulling her a little closer. "You cold?"

"I'm good," she breathed. Meredith put her hand on his cheek and pressed her lips to his, smiling at how warm they felt against her own. "I love you."

Derek wrapped his arms around her waist, watching the girls out of the corner of his eye. He could be a good uncle and kiss his wife at the same time. "I love you, too."

--

After spending a little over an hour at the orchard, breathing in the fresh fall air, the six of them piled back into the van with their twenty dollar's worth of apples and headed toward the city for a place to eat lunch. Of course, all of the walking was good exercise, but the need for food was obvious. The last thing Meredith and Derek wanted to do was go home with four whining little girls. And both were more than happy to treat them.

As the city neared, Derek looked to the backseat in the rear view mirror. "Where to, girls?" he asked.

"Chuck E. Cheese!" Sammy called out.

Meredith turned to Derek quickly, her eyes pleading with him to somehow suggest something else. She'd never been to Chuck E. Cheese, but could only imagine how horrible a restaurant with a cartoon mouse and a ball pit could be. Luckily, Derek intervened. "I don't think there's a Chuck E. Cheese around here, hun," he said apologetically.

"But I want pizza," Audrey protested.

Derek, being the clever uncle that he was, came up with a quick fix. "There's a Pizza Hut nearby. How's that sound?"

"Okay," they agreed happily. That was easy enough. Derek switched lanes so he could turn onto the boulevard. The restaurant was only five minutes away, and it was only a Thursday afternoon, so when they pulled into the parking lot, it wasn't too crowded, just a car here and there. "When we get inside, indoor voices, right?"

The little girls looked to him, exasperated expressions on their faces. "We're not babies, Uncle Derek," Carly reminded him as they all unfastened their seatbelts.

Derek laughed. "You're turning into your mom, Car."

After filing out of the car, Meredith and Derek each took the hands of two girls and walked across the parking lot. It was fairly empty, but they figured it was always better to be safe. Derek reached out to hold the door, letting the others pass through before himself. Meredith brought up the rear and smiled at him. "Thank you, Uncle Derek," she giggled teasingly.

"If you get to call me Uncle Derek, I'm referring to you as Aunt Meredith," he shot back jokingly. Derek took her hand and joined the four little girls in front of the hostess stand where they were waiting to be seated.

"It's probably better if we don't then," Meredith reasoned, unable to hide her smile. She squeezed Derek's hand and he squeezed back. Going to Pizza Hut with four of their nieces wasn't romantic, but she and Derek would make the most of it.

The hostess eventually seated them at a wrap around booth near the window, big enough to hold all of them comfortably. The little girls scooted to the center of the booth, then Meredith and Derek sat on opposite ends so they could be of assistance should any of them need anything. "Are you guys allowed to have soda?" Derek asked while they were looking through their menus.

"Your sister gave me a sippy cup for Morgan," Meredith said, reaching into her bag for the little purple cup. "She said no s-o-d-a for her."

"Mommy lets us," Audrey nodded. "But she doesn't like us to have caf...caf something."

Derek smiled at his niece. "Caffeine?"

"That's it!" she giggled. "What is that?"

"It's like sugar," Derek explained. "Sometimes sugar makes you so hyper that you bounce off the walls. And if you girls start bouncing off the walls at grandma's house, your moms are going to yell at me," he laughed.

Meredith browsed through the menu. "Sprite doesn't have caffeine. Does everyone like Sprite?"

"Uh huh," the little girls nodded, sitting up a little in the booth when the waitress approached the table. The short brunette pulled a pen from her pocket and flipped open her note pad to take down their orders. "Hi, I'm Lauren, I'll be your server. Can I start you off with something to drink today?" she asked with a friendly smile.

Derek set his menu down on the table top. "Hi," he greeted. "Can we have a pitcher of Sprite and...and an apple juice," he added for Morgan.

"Sure." The young girl scribbled it onto the pad and looked up again. "Any appetizers?"

He looked to Meredith, who shrugged. "An order of fries?" she suggested, though it sounded more like a question than a food order.

"Okay," Lauren said with a smile. She tucked her pen and notepad back into her apron and walked away from the table, a small bounce in her step.

"What kind of pizza do you girls like?" Derek asked. He scanned over the possible toppings, searching for one that they would all agree on. Meredith wasn't picky, but getting four little girls to decide on could be a challenge.

"How about pepperoni?" Meredith said, offering up a suggestion when none of the girls made one.

"I like pepperoni," Sammy agreed as she grabbed a crayon out of the small red cup sitting on the table. She began coloring on the children's menu all of the girls had been given when they were seated. The way she bit her lip in concentration made Meredith smile. Sammy reminded her a lot of herself at that age. When she remembered that Sammy was Nancy's daughter, she laughed a little in spite of herself. The irony was almost too great, even for her.

The waitress set the fries, pitcher, five cups of ice, and the glass of apple juice down the table, distributing them to everyone seated. "Do you need another minute or are you ready to order?" she asked politely.

"Half pepperoni, half plain?" Derek asked the girls before giving the official order. They seemed more interested in coloring and completing the maze on the kids' menus than the pizza order, and when he got simple nods of approval, he laughed. "A large half pepperoni, half plain, please."

"Sure," she nodded, jotting it down. "Anything else?"

"No, that's all," Derek said. He collected his and Meredith's menus and handed them back to the server. "Thanks." He began pouring the soda into the cups while Meredith carefully poured the apple juice into Morgan's sippy cup. It surprised her how normal all of this felt, like they were their own little family of six out to eat.

Derek slid the basket of fries to the center of the table, making sure each of his nieces could reach them. "We need ketchup, Uncle Derek," Audrey said as she reached for one.

"Ketchup, right," he agreed. He grabbed the bottle and began squirting out a little on each of the serving plates. Meredith laughed when she noticed how he was writing each girl's initial with it. Obviously, Uncle Derek just did cool things like that, something Meredith never would have thought to do. He passed each plate to the correct girl, even handing one to Meredith, with an "M" written neatly with the condiment.

She giggled and accepted it. "Thank you, Derek." Meredith took a fry from the basket, careful not to mess up Derek's art as she dipped it into the ketchup. "I think you need a "D" on yours."

"Fine," Derek laughed. He squeezed a "D" shaped letter onto his plate before running his own fry through it. He wasn't one to eat pizza and fries, but Meredith figured that for his nieces, he'd make the exception. Even if he and Meredith stopped off at the drive-thru after work on rare occasions, he'd opt for a salad while she had no qualms about ordering the Big Mac.

When the pizza finally came to the table, Meredith all but attacked it like a wild animal. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until the smells of the pizza wafted up her nose. "Who wants plain?" she asked, wasting no time in distributing it to the girls.

"Me," said the voices of Carly and Morgan. Meredith smiled, handing a slice to each niece. By process of elimination, Derek handed pepperoni to the other two girls and Meredith, knowing that's the kind she would want. He took a slice of plain, part of his attempt to cut back on the calorie intake.

"I can't reach," Morgan frowned as she attempted to hold the slice in her tiny hands and tried not to drop it off the table.

Meredith caught it before it nearly fell onto the seat. "Wanna sit on my lap, hun?"

Derek looked up at her, a smile on his face. He watched as she lifted the the three year old onto her lap like it was the most natural thing to do; she slid Morgan's plate next to hers and helped her fold the pizza in half so she could eat it more easily. Derek couldn't even begin to guess where Meredith got her mommy instincts; her mother certainly didn't have many to pass down in the gene pool.

As Meredith took a bite of her slice, she caught Derek looking at her, a cheesy grin plastered on his face. "What?" she giggled.

Derek shook his head. "Nothing."

"Uncle Derek always looks at you like that," Sammy observed, wiping some sauce off her chin with a napkin.

Meredith blushed a little, much to Derek's amusement. "That's because I'm in love with her."

"Like how Prince Charming is in love with Cinderella?" Audrey asked.

Derek looked to Meredith and smirked, knowing how humorous she would find the comparison. She rolled her eyes at him. Rather than trying to find a better fitting analogy, Meredith just smiled. "Yep, just like that."

**Sorry this chapter is so long. I was going to break it up into two, but I couldn't find a place to stop it that would make sense. Anyway, hope you enjoyed it. My semester ends next week, so I should be able to bank more updates so I can post more often. Thanks for your patience; I really do appreciate it.**

**My 20th b-day is on Tuesday. Reviews would make me happy, just saying. :)**


	51. The Baptism

**Disclaimer: Only in my dreams. But OMG, I met Patrick Dempsey last weekend at one of his racing events and let me tell you...that man is even more charming and gorgeous in person. I could barely contain my glee. So if I owned it, I'd be used to his dreaminess by now because I'd work with him every day. Man, Ellen is lucky. :P**

**Thanks for all the reviews. I really appreciate them. And thanks for all the birthday wishes; it was a great day! :)**

The morning of the baptism had arrived, bringing with it a rather warm October day complete with sunshine. It would be hard to leave the sun behind when they went back to Seattle, but they were used to the rain. It made the sunny days that much more valuable. However, along with the warmth and sun came an ache in Meredith's body. Her brain was still enveloped in sleep, but she could feel a dull yet constant pain as it made itself known on her insides. As coherency filled her mind instead of a sleepy haze, Meredith began to think that it was just caused from the Shepherd family football game yesterday, which she had been suckered into playing thanks to her very convincing husband. She hadn't used those muscles in a long time, considering she hadn't played football since college. Or maybe it was her body's way of getting back at her for eating so much last night at Derek's mom's birthday dinner.

But as she opened her eyes and continued to wake up her mind, Meredith realized that the kind of pain she was feeling was the kind that came along with the joys of having a uterus. Cramps. Of course. She groaned, rolling over to press her body against Derek's in an effort to absorb some of his heat. Maybe that would soothe the twinge in her abdomen. However, unless he was draped directly over her like a heating pad, he wasn't providing much help. Meredith let out a sigh.

Derek felt her fidgeting around under the covers and opened his eyes, groggy with sleep. "What's wrong?" he asked, his voice raspy.

Meredith squirmed around some more, hoping to fall back asleep. Maybe when she woke up again, the cramps would be gone. "My uterus is out to kill me," she groaned.

He looked to her sympathetically and brushed some hair off her face. "Do you have cramps?"

"Mmhmm..." she sighed. "It's Saturday. I'm due for my period on Monday." Meredith pushed her knees up to her chest, effectively rolling herself into the fetal position.

"Really painful, huh?" he guessed, trying to be supportive and stay on her good side. Derek knew that PMS-ing Meredith could be a little unpredictable, so he did his best to help her.

Meredith nodded, her back turned to him. "Yeah."

"Come here," Derek whispered. He gently pulled her to him so she was flush up against him, her back pressed into his chest. Derek lifted up her shirt a little and eased his hand below the waistband of her pants.

Meredith giggled despite her pain. "If you seriously think you're getting sex right now, the answer is no."

"I know that," he chuckled. "I'm helping you. My hand is warm. It'll help you feel better." Derek pressed his palm against her skin, and Meredith instantly felt better with his touch. "How's that?" he asked, kissing the back of her head.

"Better," Meredith breathed, resting her hand on top of his. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Derek whispered.

Meredith closed her eyes, letting her body relax. Having Derek close to her was always comforting. "Once I get up and start moving around, they'll go away."

"Did you bring anything to take to make them go away sooner?" he asked.

"No," Meredith said with a small yawn. "I forgot."

Derek thought for a moment, trying to come up with a way to ease the pain. He hated to see her experiencing any kind of discomfort. "Want me to ask Nancy if she has anything? She's right down the hall," he offered.

"What? No, that's embarrassing," Meredith dismissed with a shake of her head.

Derek laughed. "Why is that embarrassing?"

"Because. It's like asking for a condom or something."

"It is not," he argued. "It's completely normal; there's nothing to be ashamed of."

Meredith let out a groan. "Can we not have the 'womanhood is beautiful' talk? It's freaking me out."

Though it was a long shot, Derek decided to try again. "Why don't you just let me ask? And if she doesn't, I'll run to the store and get you something. I don't want you to feel crappy at the baptism," he said, trying his best to sound convincing.

"Damn, the baptism. Of course my body would pick today to rebel against me," she said, her voice muffled thanks to the pillow. "What time is it?"

Derek craned his neck to check the digital clock on the nightstand. "A little after seven. The baptism isn't until ten."

"Can we just lie here for a little bit? I don't want you to move your hand," Meredith said softly.

"Yeah." Derek kissed the back of her head again and breathed her in. They had gotten used to sleeping in the past few mornings. Returning to their normal routine was going to be difficult, but they knew staying here wouldn't last. Derek wrapped himself tighter around her. "Are cramps always this bad for you?"

Meredith shook her head. "Not always. Sometimes, they suck the life out of me, but I can deal with it."

"I feel bad," Derek murmured into her hair.

"I'm fine, Derek," she assured him. "My uterus is just doing its thing so we can have kids, so it's worth it."

Derek couldn't help but laugh. "'My uterus is just doing its thing'...that's the strangest way I've ever heard anyone describe cramps," he teased, appreciating the fact that she had a sense of humor about it. "Are you sure you don't want me to ask her?"

Since Derek had placed his hand on her lower abdomen, the pain had subsided a bit, but Meredith knew he wanted to help her as much as he could. That was just who Derek was. "Mmm...fine. You can ask," she conceded.

Derek pulled his hand out from underneath the waistband of her pajama pants and Meredith immediately missed the warmth of him. "If she's asleep, don't wake her up. She already doesn't like me. No need to add salt to the wound," she said, rolling onto her back.

He bent down and kissed her forehead. "Okay," he chuckled. After he left the room, Meredith reached over for Derek's Spiderman pillow-cased pillow and held it close to her. She smiled; it smelled like him, the fresh woodsy scent that was uniquely Derek. Being in his childhood home, it felt like she was learning everything about him all over again. She reached for the picture of Derek and his father off the nightstand. Of course, he had aged since then, but the little boy in him was still there. He still had the twinkling, often mischievous blue eyes and the happy smile. It almost looked like a picture of Derek and their own child. Meredith closed her eyes and a picture of their _maybe-one day-would be_ son appeared behind her eyelids. He looked like Derek, almost identical to the baby photos of him that she loved so much. Tears stung her eyes but she didn't feel the need to hastily wipe them away, for fear that doing so would erase the image of what she held in her mind.

Meredith placed a hand over her abdomen and smiled. Sure, the cramps sucked, but if a future little baby made by the two of them was the payoff, she was more than happy to suffer through. She heard footsteps approaching the bedroom door followed by the clicking of the knob. When Derek entered the room and found her crying, he stopped in his tracks. "Mer, what's wrong?" he asked, his voice full of worry. "Are you in that much pain?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, no. It's not that," she assured him. He sat on the edge of the bed, handing her the bottle of pills Nancy had given him while he held the glass of water for her.

"What is it?" he asked, brushing some waves of hair off her face after she sat up. "You're sure you're okay?"

She swallowed the pills quickly, hoping the relief would come sooner rather than later. "I'm fine," Meredith nodded. She handed Derek the glass, and was met with an incredulous expression. "I am," she stressed. "It's just..."

Derek's concerned eyes melted her resolve. "Seeing you in this picture, it just...I don't know. It makes me think about the little boy you were and how you grew up to be the kind of guy that asks his sister for cramp pills for me. I'm thankful, that's all," she shrugged, wiping a tear from the corner of her eye.

"Mer," he whispered, lifting the covers and crawling back under them to join her. "I'm happy to do it. I love you." They laid down in the bed, face to face. It was warm and quiet, and they were safe from the rest of the world. Meredith wrapped her arm around his waist and smiled. When it came to the two of them, there was no such thing as personal space. Being intimate had been easy since day one.

"I love you, too," she whispered. He kissed her then, long and slow. The kind of kiss that made her skin erupt into goosebumps and turned her into a boneless pile of desire. If it weren't for the uterus rebellion going on inside of her, Meredith knew the clothes would be dropping to the floor by now.

Derek snaked his hand up her shirt and tickled her back with the pads of his fingers. She arched her body into his, smiling when she felt the heat radiating off of him envelop her like a blanket. "Can we lie here all day?"

Meredith laughed. "That would make us the suckiest godparents ever."

"Probably," Derek agreed.

"You didn't wake Nancy up, did you?" She ran her fingers through his curls, twirling one in between her fingers. This whole lounging in bed thing was something they could easily get used to.

Derek shook his head. "No, she was actually in the hall. And she doesn't think any less of you for needing them, by the way," he teased, resulting in a smirk from Meredith.

"Can you not make fun of me? I'm in pain," she reminded him playfully as she gently threw her knee over his leg. "It hurts less when I straddle you."

He grinned at her choice of words. "You don't have to apologize for that. Ever," he said, a naughty glint in his eyes.

A knock at their bedroom door brought their not so subtle flirting to a halt for the time being. Meredith quickly un-straddled her husband's leg and sighed; Derek was so comfy to snuggle up to. "Come in," he responded.

"Meredith, I have a heating pad for you," Derek's mother said upon entering the room. She smiled when she saw the two nestled beneath the covers. "I saw Nancy in the hall and she told me--I hope it's okay. I just thought it would help you."

Meredith smiled gratefully. His mom reminded her so much of Susan. She was kind and helpful, and completely accepting of Meredith since the beginning. She really hit the mother-in-law jackpot as far as she was concerned. "Thank you. You didn't have to do that." Meredith sat up in bed and accepted the heating pad, gently laying it on her abdomen.

"It's no problem, sweetheart," Linda smiled.

"Is there anything you need me to do, Mom?" Derek asked, not wanting to take advantage of resting with Meredith if his mother needed help.

Linda waved her hand in dismissal. "You two just get some rest. I'm sure you don't get to relax very often back home. It's still early...don't feel like you need to rush."

"Thank you," Meredith said softly. After Derek's mother left their room, Meredith smiled. "You have the best mom ever," she yawned, curling up next to Derek again and re-straddling him.

Derek kissed her forehead, letting his lips linger there longer than usual. "Hmm...I know," he chuckled. "I think she loves you more than she loves me."

"I don't think that's possible. You're a total momma's boy," she giggled, running her fingers through his hair again and settling at the nape of his neck.

"I am not," Derek argued, feigning hurt. Meredith smirked. "Okay, fine. I guess I am."

A smile came over her face. "Thank you." As she laid there with him, Meredith was filled with an overwhelming love for her husband. Even lying in their pajamas in bed together was intimate. Their connection had been there from day one and had never faltered. "I love you," she whispered.

Derek gave her a gentle squeeze. "I love you, too."

"I always wondered if I'd be here. When we...weren't together," she began. "...I'm not big on families, but...I really wanted to meet yours. And I'm really glad I did."

"Not so scary anymore?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, not scary."

"Is the heating pad helping you?" he asked.

"Yeah, it is," Meredith nodded. She pressed her hand over Derek's stomach and giggled. "You're absorbing all the heat," she teased.

"Well, you have me pinned to the bed with your leg, so I don't really have a choice," Derek chuckled.

She cupped his cheek and kissed him again. "I thought you liked when I pinned you to the bed," Meredith smirked.

"I do. Very much so," he grinned, slowly moving his hand down her back and below the waistband of her panties. Meredith gasped when he ran his hand over her bottom, arching her body into his.

"Derek!" she shouted softly. "Your mother is down the hall."

"I'm not trying to have sex," he laughed.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You're touching my ass. It gives that impression."

Derek reluctantly removed his hand and sighed. "Ruin all of my fun."

"Oh right," she laughed. "Tell you what...tonight...me and you." Meredith tugged on Derek's tee shirt and pulled him on top of her, keeping her legs wrapped around his waist. "Sex."

"Not if you're not feeling well," Derek said, motioning to the heating pad draped over her abdomen. He kissed her again softly. All of this kissing was making the prospect of ever getting out of bed more and more unappealing.

Meredith moaned against his lips. "Well, you're making me horny, so I'd say it's almost a guarantee that I'll want sex all day. And that's highly inappropriate because we're going to be in a church. With a priest. And other holy things."

"Fine. I'll stop. But the minute we come back in here tonight...sex," he grinned before adding, "Only if you feel okay."

Meredith smiled. He always put her in front of himself. No one had ever done that before Derek came along. "Okay," she said softly.

"Knock knock," came Amy's voice from behind Derek's bedroom door. They both looked over and smiled. "Come in, Amy," Derek said.

"Hi--oh, are you okay, Meredith?" Amy asked upon entering, holding a sleeping Kyle over her shoulder.

Meredith blushed self-consciously and nodded. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Just, uh..."

"I get it," Amy said graciously. "Those are no fun."

"No, they're not," Meredith agreed, giggling slightly. "How's Kyle?"

Amy propped the baby on her arm, laughing when he made a pouty face for being interrupted of his sleep. "He's tired today. Usually he's a late sleeper, so he wasn't very happy when we woke him up, were you honey?" she asked, kissing the top of her son's head.

"Can I hold my godson?" Derek asked, reaching his arm out for his nephew.

"Sure," Amy nodded as she handed Kyle to her older brother. "Maybe he'll be less fussy for you two. I don't think he likes me very much right now," she joked.

"Amy!" Nancy called from the hall. "Mom wants to know what booties you're putting the baby in."

Amy rolled her eyes playfully. "I'll be back. Would you two mind watching him for a few minutes?"

Meredith shook her head, happy to get the chance to spend some time with their nephew. "No, not at all," she smiled.

Derek's sister made her way out into the hallway. By now, the house was alive and full of activity. Meredith always wondered what it was like to grow up in a large family; now she knew. "Family events are a big deal here, huh?" she asked, smiling a little.

"Oh yeah," he nodded. "And this is just a baptism. You should have seen the weddings. They would start doing hair at five in the morning. Always fun though."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder, watching as he rocked the baby in his arms. "Yeah," she whispered.

Kyle let out small cry and Derek smiled at him. "What's the matter, buddy? Is this whole baptism thing getting on your nerves?" he asked with a laugh. "It's not so bad, I promise."

Despite Derek's efforts at calming him down, Kyle's cries escalated even further and he wailed in Derek's arms. "You want to see if you can calm him down?" he asked Meredith.

"Um, okay," Meredith said hesitantly. Kyle paid no attention as he was passed from his uncle to his aunt; he just continued to cry, occasionally hiccupping. "It's okay, sweetheart," she soothed, holding the baby close to her chest as she had done with him before. At first, Kyle was resistant of Meredith's attempts to get him to stop crying, but when Derek began patting his back while Meredith let him hold her finger, the baby began to quiet down. "Hmm...we're a good team," she said softly before kissing her husband.

"We are," Derek grinned. "That or he just likes your boobs."

Meredith gasped. "Derek! You've been spending way too much time with Mark..."

"What? It's true," he shrugged, fixing Kyle's sock.

"Babies do that because it comforts them," Meredith explained. "And it'll be even more adorable when our babies do it."

Derek smiled; every time Meredith mentioned babies, he swore his heart leapt to his throat. Just a short time ago, any semblance of baby talk had her running for the hills. But now, every conversation was a "when we do," without hesitation. "Do you still want to start trying on our anniversary?" he asked.

Meredith ran her finger over Kyle's cheek, wondering what it would be like to actually carry a child. _Or raise a child_. It scared her and thrilled her all at once, but she wanted nothing more. "Unless something crazy comes up or we're just way too overwhelmed with work, then yeah," she shrugged. "I don't want to wait too long. Pregnancy _and_ residency at the same time...that scares me a little."

"If you wanted to hold off, that's fine. I know it's stressful. We don't have to make up our minds now. I just don't want to rush into it if we're not ready," Derek said softly, kissing her temple.

"I think we'll be ready--I mean, work is going to be busy regardless," Meredith said, brushing her fingers over the dark hair of Kyle's head. "I just...I never even knew I wanted babies until you came along, and now it's all I think about sometimes. So...July. I think July would be good," she whispered, smiling when the baby grabbed onto her shirt with his tiny fist.

Derek wrapped his arm around his wife and pulled her close to him. "Okay."

"If I spend too much more time with your family, I'm going to move it up to now," she giggled, letting Kyle suck on her finger. "He looks a lot like you."

"All of the kids in the family are born with thick, dark hair. I'm guessing ours will, too," he said.

"Fine with me. I was born bald," Meredith whispered, turning her head to kiss him. "We should return him now so we can get ready. It's probably frowned upon to show up at a baptism in sweatpants," she laughed.

Derek smirked at her. "Probably, yeah."

--

Meredith hadn't seen the inside of a church since...she couldn't even remember. Maybe when she was in Europe with Sadie. There had been a few cathedrals. Or no, she had been to one since. Her roommate in med school needed a fill-in bridesmaid for her wedding and Meredith had volunteered her services. She remembered the horrible taffeta dress and the monstrosity of an up-do. She sort of remembered sleeping with one of the groomsmen that night, but maybe not. She had been drunk, so the details were a little hazy. Wait, no. The non-wedding of her best friend. That's the last time she was in a church. _That turned out really well_. All of these thoughts were going through her mind as she sat in the pew next to her husband and held a sleeping Kyle in her arms. Thankfully, her cramps had subsided somewhat, but now she was horny. And being horny in a Church was wrong on so many levels, especially when she should be paying attention and being a good godparent.

She uncrossed and re-crossed her legs, pulling her skirt over her knees. Derek had assured her over and over again that it was long enough, but she wouldn't stop fidgeting with it. "Mer, it's fine," he whispered, leaning over to wrap his arm around his shoulder.

"No speaking. church," she whispered back. Kyle looked up at his aunt and gave her a frown. Both Meredith and Derek had to bite back their laughs at the grumpy look on his face. Just as they were sure there was going to be an outburst, he discovered Meredith's hair, and took a handful into his mouth. Meredith thought of taking it from him, but he seemed occupied and content, so she decided against it. Derek looked over to her and smiled. Meredith had the aunt thing down perfectly.

When it came time for the priest to pour the water over his head, of course he had a fit, which everyone expected. The little boy was just angry with the world today, it seemed. Luckily, after Meredith started bouncing him a little bit, he fell asleep with his head resting on her shoulder, his little hand clutching onto her blouse. He remained quiet for the remainder of the service, happy to have his aunt holding him.

After exiting the Church, all of the family that attended the baptism, including everyone but the littlest Shepherd kids, gathered outside for pictures. Meredith was learning that Derek's mom documented every event in their lives. Her own mother wasn't big on family albums, so she was thankful that Derek's was. At least they'd have pictures to show their kids, even if most of them came from Derek's side. Linda called out for Meredith and Derek to come forward for a photo with their godson. "Okay, how about you two stand right here and hold Kyle between you?" she asked.

The two followed Linda's orders, posing for pictures with the baby and the rest of the family outside the Church. It took nearly an hour until the little photo session ended and they were free to go back to the house for the family party. Meredith wanted nothing more than to get home and change into a more comfortable outfit. Getting dressed up was nice, but she much preferred her jeans and slippers to skirts and high heels. She and Derek were relieved to find out that the party was casual dress--yet another reason why Meredith really loved her husband's family.

Upon arriving back at the house, the two went up to their bedroom, anxious to get a few minutes of alone time. As soon as the door clicked shut, Derek pulled her into his arms and smiled. "We're good godparents."

"Hmm...I think so," Meredith giggled. "I was afraid I'd get nervous and accidentally drop him in the fountain thingy, but I didn't."

"We did good," Derek said in agreement. "And you...very hot."

Meredith wrapped her arms around his neck and smirked. "Yeah?"

"Mmhmm," he murmured. He reached around her and worked his fingers on her zipper, letting the brown skirt fall to the floor.

"Derek, what are you doing?" she asked, unable to stop herself from giggling. Meredith knew full well what he was doing. And if they were at home, she wouldn't have a problem with it. But with a house full of family downstairs, letting him strip her down seemed wrong.

Derek smiled, grabbing hold of her bottom and picking her up. Meredith wrapped her legs around his waist and her hands traveled through his hair and down to the back of his neck, where she nimbly undid his tie, dropping it onto the floor below. "Helping you change," he said simply, dropping kisses on her neck.

"You're making it porny," Meredith corrected. The familiar tingle inside her was growing more and more with every second, almost enough to let him take advantage of her right then and there. They could probably get away with it, but still, she wouldn't let it happen; not right now, anyway.

"I am," he agreed, gently dropping her down on top of the bed. Meredith scooted over to make room for him.

When he dropped down next to her, she smiled. "Later. Definitely later."

"You're feeling better, right?" Derek asked, running his hand over her abdomen, as if to sense any lingering pain she felt.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah," she whispered. "I am."

Derek rolled on top of her and pulled her blouse over her head. "You sure?" he questioned again, kissing above the lace of her bra.

"Derek, seriously," she laughed. "We should have been back downstairs by now..." Meredith could feel his growing erection through his suit pants and she gasped. "And you have to get rid of that."

"Quickie?"

Meredith laughed and rolled her eyes. "No."

"Fine, later," he sighed in resignation, kissing her one more time before sitting up. The two reluctantly hopped off the bed and quickly changed into more comfortable clothing. As they exited their bedroom, Mark was walking out of the bathroom in the hall. He eyed them up and down before grinning.

"You two had sex, didn't you?" he asked.

"No, we didn't," Meredith answered, shaking her head. "Almost, but no," she added as an afterthought.

Derek reached over and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "Just wait..." he whispered into her ear. Meredith nudged him playfully with her elbow. She really preferred if Mark didn't know about their pending sex. Luckily, Derek's sister called them downstairs before Mark could ask any more inappropriate questions. They re-entered the living room, where family and friends were gathered, all there to celebrate Kyle's baptism. Amy and Tom walked over with Kyle and Derek grinned. "How you doing, Kyle? Still mad at all of us?" he joked.

The baby looked to Derek and gave him the smallest of smiles, seeming much more awake than he was earlier in the day. "Maybe he's just p-i-s-s-e-d about that white outfit you're making him wear," Mark teased, ruffling the hair on the top of Kyle's head.

Amy and Tom laughed. "I'm sure it's a little itchy. I wouldn't want to wear it either. You want to get changed, pumpkin?" Amy asked her son before kissing his cheek. "I packed him some extra clothes in his bag."

"Oh, we'll change him if you want," Derek offered.

"You sure?" Tom asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, we'd love to."

"I'm surprised you two don't have a baby of your own yet. You're so good with him," Amy laughed. She grabbed Kyle's bag off the couch and handed it to Derek, who smiled.

"Soon," he replied. "Mom already said that the next baby born better be ours."

"It better be," Tom chuckled. "Amy and I want to start trying for another one soon."

Mark nearly choked on his beer. "What?"

"Seriously?" Derek asked as Amy handed Meredith the baby. "But Kyle's still so little..."

"We want them close in age...kind of like how Mom and Dad had the four of you so close together," Amy teased. "I always hated how I was the accidental miracle that happened six years later."

Derek laughed at his little sister. "Well, I guess for a pediatrician, you don't have a tough schedule..."

"Take it back!" Amy said, pretending to be offended. "Brain surgery isn't all that impressive."

"It is, actually," Derek smirked.

Amy rolled her eyes playfully. "Go change my son," she laughed.

"Fine," Derek conceded. He placed his hand on the small of Meredith's back and the two walked into the den, which was unoccupied.

Meredith waited for Derek to set out the changing mat before lying the baby down on top of it. "By the time we have kids, there's already going to be twenty Shepherd grandkids," she giggled.

"Save the best for last," Derek boasted. He pulled a clean diaper from the bag and handed it to Meredith, who looked at him incredulously.

"Me?" she asked.

"You're a good diaper changer," he complimented as the two worked together to get Kyle out of the fancy, white outfit he was in. The baby squirmed around a bit, but they eventually succeeded.

Meredith began to peel off the adhesive on the diaper Kyle was wearing, then looked to Derek. "He's going to pee on me. You know how baby penises are."

Derek laughed heartily at her remark as he searched through the diaper bag. "No he won't."

"How do you know?"

"Pee-pee teepee," he said, showing Meredith the cone-like contraption he pulled from the bag. "You put this over his...and it saves you from getting peed on."

Meredith looked to the strange object curiously. "That's the weirdest thing I've ever seen. How do you know what it's called?"

"I have six nephews," Derek shrugged. He pulled the old diaper off the baby and set the cloth teepee covered in baseballs over him. "See?"

"We're going to have to get one of those one day," she giggled, pulling a wipe from the pack. "I know you think we're having girls, but with your DNA, I'm sure we'll end up with a boy in our set of quads..."

"Quads would be fun," Derek grinned as he fastened a new diaper on Kyle.

Meredith pulled a blue outfit with a giraffe on it from the bag and handed it to her husband. "Oh yeah..." she said dryly. "When they ship me off to the psych ward after I go crazy, you'll see how fun it is..." she said teasingly. "Kyle, Uncle Derek is silly." The baby let out a tiny laugh and reached for Meredith's hair again, holding a few strands between his little fingers.

"You like playing with her hair?" Derek chuckled as he snapped the boy's outfit together. "There we go. All done." He picked Kyle up off the couch and kissed his cheek. "That's more comfortable than your Church outfit, isn't it? I helped Aunt Mer change her outfit, too..." he grinned.

"Derek!" she hissed. "No porny talk..."

"Later?"

She rolled her eyes and took the baby from him, propping him over her shoulder. "Yes, later. Right now, family stuff," Meredith said, kissing Kyle's cheek. "And food."

There would definitely be porniness later. She would make sure of it.

--

By the time the last of the guests left the party, it was nearing ten o'clock. It had been a long day, but a fun one. There was food and conversation, and Meredith and Derek also partook a game soccer, tag, and a few rounds of Go Fish with the kids. As it turns out, little kids are never ending supplies of energy. As soon as one activity ended, they were anxious to begin another. After the excitement of the day wore off, Meredith and Derek found a cozy spot on the couch and snacked while conversing with the family. Hearing Derek's mom reminisce about Derek and Mark's childhood was by far the most enjoyable part of the day, at least for Meredith. Derek and Mark might have a slightly different opinion.

"When Derek was little, he had a terrarium full of frogs," Linda said, taking a sip of tea. "Disgusting little creatures, but he loved all of them..."

Mark sighed. "Here we go..."

"And one day when I was out gardening, Mark decided to take one of them and stick it in the microwave. Derek's favorite frog. Oh, what was his name dear?" she asked her son, who was sitting next to his wife on the couch.

"Riblet," Derek said, Meredith snuggled into his side.

"Riblet! That's it. I remember I walked into the house to check on you kids and I saw Mark standing on the kitchen chair--you couldn't even reach the microwave," she laughed, patting the top of Mark's hand. "Anyway, he put Riblet in there and--"

Mark decided now would be a good time to defend himself. This was one of Mrs. Shepherd's favorite stories, and he always had to make sure he set the record straight. "I never pushed start..."

"Derek, where were you?" Meredith asked with a giggle.

"Probably looking for my frog," Derek responded, throwing an amused glance at Mark. "We weren't fighting or anything, so he wasn't out to seek revenge," he laughed. "Just a little science experiment. Exploding frogs."

"He never exploded!" Mark argued, taking a sip of his beer. "He smelled like popcorn for a few hours after sitting in the microwave for thirty seconds. But no explosions."

"They never told you that story?" Liz asked Meredith.

Meredith shook her head. "I thought I'd heard everything, but I guess not..."

"Did Derek ever tell you about the time we were potty tra--" Nancy began before Derek interrupted.

"Nance, please," Derek pleaded jokingly. "No more blackmail."

Nancy gave have her brother a smirk. "This isn't blackmail. These are adorable childhood stories."

"Well then, I guess you won't mind if I pull out your adorable prom pictures," Derek retorted, a challenging smile on his face.

"You wouldn't."

Derek laughed. "I know where they are."

"Fine, I won't tell that one," Nancy sighed.

"Ooh, I have one." Kathleen straightened up on the couch and cleared her throat. Meredith could tell this would be a good one, then again, every story she'd heard so far was priceless. Even if her husband and Mark were the targets. "Remember when those two were really little--I think I was eight. Nance was six, so they were only four. Dad was going to take them camping for the weekend, and they slept with their fishing gear on. Little vests and hats. They were so excited," she smiled, recalling the memory. "They even pitched a couch cushion tent in the living room the night before."

Mrs. Shepherd subconsciously ran her finger over her wedding ring. Derek's dad had died many years ago, but Meredith could tell that she still missed her husband. Even the _thought_ of losing Derek made Meredith sick to her stomach; she couldn't imagine having to go on, not to mention being there for her children. Derek's mother was a strong woman, and Meredith admired her for that. "You two always loved doing things with him."

"I remember when Mom was in the hospital, right after she had Amy, Dad took us to the store and let us pick out balloons and cray paper so we could decorate the house," Liz said.

"And you boys both chose black balloons for your newborn sister," Amy laughed, a sleeping Kyle resting in her arms. "Apparently I was hated for being a girl..."

"We didn't hate you," Mark rebutted. "Derek and I were just hoping for a boy...someone to do our dirty work so we wouldn't caught."

Linda shook her head in amusement. "You boys never got away with anything, not even at your most clever..."

"That's only because we always got tattled on before we could do anything," Derek explained, smirking at each of his sisters.

"We were good tattlers," Nancy shrugged. "Not our fault you guys could never out-smart us."

Mark grinned. "Oh we did. A few times, actually."

"Like what?" Meredith asked, giggling. All of these stories made her realize why Mark and Derek were such close friends. Growing up in a house full of girls, they relied on each other for entertainment. It made her thankful that they were friends again. She could tell how much happier they were now than back in the days when Mark first moved to Seattle.

"I'll tell you later," Derek whispered into her ear. Apparently, whatever those two had gotten away with was still too good to share.

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

Reminiscing with the family had been fun, but now, Derek wanted nothing more than to have some alone time with Meredith. It had been a long day full of activity. And they always helped each other wind down. "I think we're going to head up to bed," Derek said. He stretched then got up off the couch, Meredith next to him. "We'll see you guys before we leave tomorrow afternoon, right?"

"Absolutely," Kathleen said with a smile. "We wouldn't let you three leave without saying goodbye."

They all said their goodnights, then Meredith and Derek went upstairs toward their bedroom. The door had barely shut behind them when Derek pressed his lips to hers, kissing her with all he had. Meredith moaned into his mouth and threaded her fingers through his hair. The intimacy they had to keep chaste in front of the family was unleashed as soon as they were alone.

Derek eased her onto the mattress. "You sure you feel okay?" he asked between kissing her. "If not, we don't have to..."

"I'm fine, promise," Meredith whispered as she began pulling off his shirt. "I need you."

"I need you, too."

After she successfully removed his shirt, she wasted no time in removing her own, tossing it onto the floor. "I want this off, too," Derek smirked, unhooking her bra and sliding it down her arms.

Meredith unzipped his jeans, managing to get them off with her feet while he gave attention to her breasts. He bit down on the sensitive skin and she whimpered. Derek always knew exactly what to do to her body, working her until she could barely take it anymore. "Derek..." she moaned.

He quickly fingers worked at her pants, pulling them down in seconds, along with her panties. "Condom," Meredith breathed. "Go...in the bag."

"Okay." Derek hopped up off the bed and searched for a condom in their bags. After checking in zipper compartments and pockets, there were none to be found. He sighed. "I can't find any."

"What?" Meredith asked. She sat up in the bed and looked to her husband. "How many did you pack?"

"I only used the one from my wallet the other day. You had the no sex rule, so I didn't pack any extras," Derek replied.

She groaned. "Well then, I guess we're not having sex..."

"We're having sex," Derek argued. He wanted it just as much as she did; there would be sex, even if he had to make a trip to the drug store. "We can go condom-less. Or I can ask Mark."

"Why would Mark have condoms with him?"

Derek laughed as he pulled on a tee shirt. "He's Mark. He's carried condoms with him since he was sixteen."

"He's going to use this against us forever. You know that, right?" Meredith asked, dropping her head back on the pillows.

"Well, it's either shameless teasing for years to come. Or we can wait until we get home," Derek reasoned. He _really_ hoped she'd be willing to suffer Mark's immaturity. Her nakedness was too much for him to handle. And taking a cold shower was far less appealing than making love to her.

Meredith had no choice. "Fine. Go ask him," she conceded. "Next time...don't listen to my stupid rules. We always end up having sex anyway."

"Good to know," Derek chuckled. He leaned down and kissed her, then pulled the covers over her body. "Keep warm."

"I will," Meredith giggled. She couldn't be mad at him, no matter how hard she tried. His damn McDreamy-ness always won her over. Derek gently closed the door behind him, bracing himself for what was sure to be an amusing conversation as he made the walk of shame down the hall. He knocked on Mark's bedroom door.

Mark opened it a few moments later, a curious expression on his face. "What's up?"

Rather than risk someone overhearing, Derek walked into the room. "I need a condom."

Mark grinned at him. "You and Grey forget the stash?"

"Mark, please. Condom," Derek begged. "Mer's waiting for me."

"How many do you need?" Mark asked, taking his wallet from on top of the nightstand. "Four? Five?" he teased.

Derek rolled his eyes. "You really have five condoms with you?"

"You never know when you're gonna need them," Mark shrugged in his defense. "Like now, for example. So how many?"

"I don't know...two, I guess," he replied. Mark handed Derek two condoms, clearly amused by the situation. "Thank you."

"Have fun!" Mark said with a naughty smile as Derek quickly made his exit. "Don't be that loud. I'm tired!"

Derek waved his hand in the air, acknowledging Mark's request. He turned the door knob to his own room. Meredith looked over at him, smiling. "Did he have some?"

"He offered me five. I took two," Derek said as he tossed them onto the bed. He pulled off his clothes and rejoined her under the covers.

"What? Five?"

"Don't ask..." Derek chuckled. "I never thought asking Mark for condoms would be more embarrassing than asking my sister for Midol. Turns out I was wrong."

Meredith smiled at him. "Well, I appreciate it--both times."

"I'm a good husband," he said amusedly, kissing her again.

Meredith giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I think so, too."

**Hope you liked it! I just finished school for the semester last week, so I'm going to try to bank lots of updates so I can post more often. Thanks so much for all of your patience, you guys! **

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	52. Saturday Spent at Home

**Disclaimer: Ha. If I owned it, Meredith & Derek would have gotten something better than a Post-it wedding. And George and Iz would be alive and well. Clearly, I don't own the show.**

**Thanks for the reviews. I really appreciate them. :)**

Since arriving back in Seattle after spending a few days with the family in New York, things had gotten back to normal. They returned to work on Monday, and it was like they never left. The chaos and blood and surgeries were waiting for them the minute they walked into the doors, almost like some supernatural force was getting back at them for taking five days off. Luckily, they had Saturday to relax. And like every day off, sleeping late was the first priority.

Meredith had been a little edgy this week; her interns were no better than a live action soap opera, flitting about the hospital and creating fake drama. And she had been snapping at Derek over the littlest things. He knew it was her 'time of the month,' so he didn't take it seriously, but still, he wanted to help her in any way he could, even if doing so didn't seem to do any good.

Derek woke up to Charlie licking his face, anxious to go outside. Whenever they had the day off, Meredith and Derek would play with him out on the land and let him run around until he tired himself out. "Charlie, give me a few minutes. Okay, buddy?" Derek said sleepily, patting the top of the puppy's head. He glanced over at Meredith, happy to find her sleeping soundly. Work had worn her out this week. It was nice to see her so relaxed. "If I get up, Mer will get mad because I need to keep her warm…"

Despite Derek's poor attempts at excuses, Charlie continued to climb all over the bed. Eventually he calmed down a little and settled for lying in between the two of them. Meredith rolled over, unconsciously flinging her arm over both Charlie and Derek's stomach. He reached for her hand; it was warm and soft like it always was. Most surgeons had rough skin because of the constant glove switches and hand washes, but her hands were always smooth. He kissed each of her fingertips tenderly. The intimacy they shared truly never faltered. "I love you," Derek whispered softly.

Meredith blinked her eyes a few times as she adjusted them to the slight light coming through the curtains. "Hmm?" she asked. Her eyes fluttered shut again. On days off, Meredith really was dead to the world before she had gotten all of the sleep that work deprived her of during the week.

"Sleep," Derek whispered. Meredith wasted no time in doing so. He too managed to get another hour or so of sleeping before Charlie's patience ran out. The dog scampered around the covers, successfully tangling and bunching the soft blanket that had been keeping them warm. "Charlie, please..." Derek groaned. He glanced over to the clock on the nightstand. 9:27. It was rare that he slept so late. After adjusting to the light coming in through the windows, Derek sat up in the bed and ran his hand through his hair.

Meredith was still sleeping beside him, her arm resting above her head on the pillow. After pressing a small, soft kiss to her forehead, he quietly stepped onto the floor. Waking her up would be a bad move, especially when he knew she wasn't feeling well. Whatever day of the week they were given off, typically Saturdays, they made it a point to relax. Movies on the couch, lounging on the patio in the backyard, hours spent having round after round of sex, or even folding laundry together. It didn't matter. Spending time together was all they wanted.

Derek managed to make it out of the room, Charlie in tow, without Meredith even flinching. He walked down the stairs of their home. Living out here was so different from living in town. It was quiet and serene; the loudest sounds came from their bedroom, which may be a nuisance to the animals living amidst the grass and trees, but neither Meredith nor Derek were particularly apologetic. After all those months of living in the old house and having to keep the noise level to a minimum for the sake of their roommates, they welcomed the loud sex that came with the freedom of living out here.

The brisk October air hit Derek as soon as he opened the sliding glass back door so Charlie could run around and stretch his legs. Derek shut it after he knew Charlie was content for a few minutes so he could make some coffee. Coffee always helped get the day started, whether they were working or not. The brew percolated in the high tech coffee maker, a wedding gift from Cristina. Soon the aroma filtered throughout the kitchen and throughout the house. This is how it was on most days off; Derek came down and started the coffee, and Meredith would come down a little while later with a cup waiting for her. Derek smiled at the thought. Days off were always days well spent with Meredith.

By ten o'clock, he heard Meredith moving around upstairs. He could tell by her heavy footsteps that she wasn't in the best of moods. She was always a little irritable during her time of the month, which is something he understood well after growing up in a house with four sisters.

"Derek!" Meredith called out from the top of the stairs. "Where are the tampons?"

He swallowed a sip of his coffee, pondering an acceptable answer to her question. "Probably in the bathroom cabinet," Derek responded. He really didn't know where else they would be.

"Well, I don't see them," she yelled back. He heard her stomp off, and took that as his cue to go help her find them. Otherwise, things could get a little unpleasant.

"I thought you just bought some," Derek recalled as he stood in the doorway to their master bathroom.

Meredith knelt down to look under the bathroom sink. "Me too. So where are they?"

"You say it like I used them," he said with a slight laugh. Meredith shot him her 'don't mess with me' look. Clearly, she wasn't in the mood for jokes.

"Well, I don't know where they are," she huffed, tossing a hairbrush from the drawer.

Before she completely wreaked havoc on their bathroom, Derek knelt down beside her to help her search. He opened the adjoining set of cabinets, immediately spotting the blue box she was looking for. "Here," he said, handing them to her. "These?"

Meredith snatched it from his hands and sighed heavily. "Yeah."

Derek stood up and smiled at her. He decided that he would be the first one to extend the olive branch. "Morning," he whispered, kissing her forehead. Meredith granted him the smallest of smiles, then immediately went back to her pissed off face. He was walking out of the bathroom to give her her privacy when she pulled him back by his tee shirt. "Hug," she murmured. She could never stay mad at him for long, especially when he didn't do anything wrong.

Wrapping his arms around her, Derek grinned. "Definitely need a hug," he said softly before kissing the crown of her head. "You okay?"

"Just stupid girl problems," Meredith shrugged. "I'm okay."

"It's not stupid. You don't feel good," he argued, running his fingers up and down her back. "How about we just hang around the house today?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, we can do something if you wanted to."

"I want nothing more than to lounge around on the couch with you and Charlie. It'll be fun," Derek said, trying his best to sound convincing.

"Okay." She cupped his slightly stubbled cheeks in her hands and kissed him, soft and slow. Kissing her husband always made her feel better, no matter how crappy she was feeling. "I love you."

Derek pulled her a little closer. "I love you too."

"I'm going to take a shower," Meredith said when they ended their embrace. She squeezed his hand gently and Derek smiled.

"Take your time," he nodded. "I'll start breakfast."

Meredith grabbed a large towel from the shelf and smiled. "Chocolate chip pancakes?" she asked sweetly.

He kissed her cheek, letting his lips linger there for a few moments. "Sure."

"Thank you for helping me find the tampons," she said before he closed the door behind him.

Derek laughed. "Any time."

--

A little while later when Meredith walked down the stairs after taking a shower, she found her husband and their dog waiting for her in the kitchen, ready to eat the breakfast he had prepared. "Smells good," she smiled, wearing her Dartmouth tee and a pair of his sweats, rolled at the waist. The perfect attire for a lazy day at home.

She took her seat next to him at the table. Charlie wagged his tail when he saw her, patting her thigh with his paw. "Hey, buddy," Meredith giggled. "You're getting too big to sit on my lap. How about we curl up on the couch later, okay?" Charlie seemed content with that response, and laid down at her feet, chewing on his hamburger toy.

"Syrup?" Derek asked. Before she could answer, he had already passed it over to her. It was one of Meredith's rules; unless pancakes were drowning in syrup, they weren't worth eating.

Meredith saw him smirking as she poured the sticky confection over her breakfast. "What?" she asked, mirroring the look he was giving her. "I like syrup."

"I know," he chuckled.

"I'm already bloated and feel like I swallowed a bowling ball. A little syrup isn't going to do any more damage," she shrugged, finally setting down the bottle.

Derek took a bite of his own breakfast. Compared to Meredith's plate, it actually made his chocolate chip pancakes look healthy. "Do you feel better after your shower?"

"Yeah, a little," Meredith admitted. "At least we have off today. I hate going to work when I feel like this."

"Do you think your gynecologist could give you something to help? I feel bad," Derek said sympathetically.

Meredith took a sip of her coffee. "She'd probably just put me on the pill. That helps with the symptoms, but I'd rather not."

"No?" he asked.

"I was on the pill back in college and while I was in Europe. I stopped it when I went to med school, because really...who has time for sex in med school? Anyway, my cycle was out of whack for a few months after I stopped. Then I moved here and met you and never bothered going back on it. I don't know...if we're trying for a baby in a few months, I just want everything inside me in working order, you know?" Meredith said, wiping her fingers on a napkin. "I'll suffer through a few days of crappiness if it means we can make a baby sooner."

Derek nodded in understanding. Of course he hated that she was in pain, but the way she talked about babies so frequently couldn't help but make him happy. He'd wanted kids with her for a long time, and as July drew closer and closer, the more excited he felt. Derek leaned in to kiss her. "Babies," he whispered.

He felt Meredith smile against his lips. "Babies," she echoed.

"So what did you want to do today?" he asked.

Meredith watched the syrup drip off her fork and puddle onto her plate as she pondered what they could do to entertain themselves. Because their normal routine of sex was out of the question, it took a little longer to come up with an answer. "Maybe a walk and then a movie on the couch," she said eventually. "And dinner, obviously."

"We can do that," he grinned.

"Sorry," Meredith said, blushing a little. "I'm a buzzkill."

Derek shook his head amusedly. "You are not. I love hanging out with you." Almost on cue, Charlie squeaked his toy, reminding them of his presence. "And you, buddy," he chuckled. "We always have fun."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. "Yeah. We do."

When they had finished off the last of their breakfast, Meredith walked their dishes over to the sink. Charlie followed close behind. Wherever she was, their puppy was never far away. "I'll clean up. Why don't you go get dressed, then we can go for a walk," she suggested, rinsing some of the sticky syrup left behind under the stream of water before placing them on the rack in the dishwasher.

"Okay." Derek placed the syrup bottle back in the fridge, his attempt at getting in one last kiss before he went upstairs. "What if I wanted to wear those pants?" he asked teasingly.

She leaned her body into his, savoring his closeness. "I always steal your pants. It's what we do..." she giggled. Married life, no matter how perfectly ordinary it was sometimes, was always fun with him. That's all they really wanted anyway.

--

"I love living out here," Meredith said as she breathed in the crisp autumn air. It was almost November, which meant the cold winds and thunderstorms weren't far off. October was still fairly sunny, or as sunny as days got in Seattle. Spending a little time walking around their land was always good exercise, especially when they had the day off to enjoy it.

Derek kissed her temple, an arm wrapped around her waist. "Me too," he agreed. Charlie was running a little ahead of them with a stick in his mouth. Whenever they got the chance, Derek and Meredith would take him on long walks like this and just let him run around whenever he wanted to. Occasionally he would look back to make sure they were close behind, then go trotting off again. Living here was like owning a little piece of earth that only they new about; it was peaceful, secluded, and completely theirs.

"Charlie certainly likes it," she giggled, watching how he jumped around playfully, much like Doc used to do. "He always gets so excited when we go on walks."

"I think he likes it when we're home too," Derek said as the two reached the clearing by the water.

"Remember the first time we came out here?" Meredith asked, her breath hot against his ear.

Derek pressed his lips to her temple. "Mmhmm..."

The early morning mist had come and gone, leaving behind a stretch of blue that went on for miles. Meredith was actually the first one to discover it. Back in the early days of their relationship, before things were not so happy for a while. It was a warm night in the middle of the summer, two or three weeks before Addison arrived. Meredith told him that she felt like taking a walk, so they did. Derek had bought the land on a whim, barely even surveying what he had actually purchased. Trekking out was a first for both of them.

Meredith insisted that they turn right at the clearing instead of left. And there it was. Their own little body of water complete with a dock. To this day, Derek didn't know who put it there. His realtor mentioned that the surrounding area had once been used as a camping ground, then sold as real estate, so he assumed it had been there for the occasional fisherman that ventured out. Meredith was thrilled when she found it, wasting no time as she pulled off her clothes right there on the wooden dock. Derek watched her, captivated by how uninhibited and carefree she was, laughing as she gracefully dove in. Before he met Meredith, he had never been the spontaneous type, the kind to strip stark naked and dive into a lake at dusk, but that night he did.

They made love in the water that evening, then on the dock, in the shower, in bed. Meredith was insatiable; Derek wondered in awe where she got her energy when the hospital wore them both so thin sometimes. It was one of the things he loved most about her. She made him feel alive.

Meredith ran her fingers up and down his spine with her fingertips as they both recalled the memory etched in their brains. They hadn't been here together since that night a little over three years ago. Life had gotten too busy for walks on the land or skinny dipping in the lake. Their relationship had grown since then. They were no longer the item at the center of the Seattle Grace rumor mill. Now they were married. Proof to all those that doubted them that they were for real and forever.

"We should go swimming again," Derek commented, running his lips over her neck, her ear, and her temple. Romance was never lost on them, not even in the woods.

Meredith giggled a little. "You'd still do that?"

"Of course," he said. "Why? You wouldn't?"

"I would," Meredith said with a nod, pulling her sleeves over her hands when a breeze blew by them. "It's just...I thought we were all mature now."

Derek ran his hands up her arms and smirked. "Nothing wrong with underwater sex," he grinned. "In fact, I encourage it."

"Bathtub sex works, too. We haven't done that in a while," she smiled, taking his hand so they could follow Charlie on the path he was creating for them.

"Just say the word," Derek teased. Meredith nudged him with her hip and he nudged back. They were still flirty with each other, and that was something they knew would always be there.

Meredith smiled, breathing in the air around her and enjoying Derek's closeness. "When we get back, I think we should have a couch date...pajamas, junk food, movies," she suggested. "We haven't done that in a while either."

"I'd love to," he whispered as he kissed the crown of her head. "Although technically, you're already in pajamas..."

"I'm wearing your boots and a coat over top, not out here in a night gown," Meredith giggled, taking the bottle of water from him and unscrewing the cap. "Do you want me to wear a night gown...maybe something flannel?" she asked before taking a sip.

Derek looked at her incredulously. "I don't think you'd ever do that," he countered. "You would look adorable though."

"Maybe I'll have to go out and buy one," Meredith said with a shrug, kneeling down to pet Charlie when he trotted back over to them.

"I think you should stick to wearing my sweats. It would be too weird if I opened the drawer and actually found a pair," he kidded, earning him a playful eye roll from her. But she leaned in and kissed him anyway. He looked too woodsy and adorable not to.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Hmm...true."

--

"Do we have chocolate?" Meredith asked, rummaging through the cabinets. Since arriving back at the house, Derek had changed into pajamas, per Meredith's request. Now they were stocking up on junk food they could eat while watching movies. Lazy Saturdays didn't happen very often, so when they did, Meredith convinced him that over-eating and lounging around were absolutely required.

"Probably," he nodded. "You live here, so it's almost a guarantee..." Meredith turned around and smirked at him. Derek just laughed, "I think there's a few chocolate bars in the cabinet above the counter."

Meredith opened the suggested cabinet, and after a small search, found the chocolate in there. She pulled it out and placed it next to the other snack foods like pretzels and cookies. She should feel bad about the calories, but she really didn't. "Don't burn the popcorn," she said, biting into a chocolate chip cookie.

"I'm not," he laughed. "I'm keeping an eye on the microwave like you told me to. Dangerous health hazard, but...I'll do it for my wife," Derek teased, leaning against the island.

"Thank you," Meredith said with a smile. She walked over him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He always smelled so good; even being around him comforted her.

Derek ran his fingers up and down her spine. "You feel okay?"

Meredith nodded into his chest. "Mmhmm. The walk helped. And you and Charlie, too."

"Good," he whispered as he peppered kisses to the top of her head. The microwave beeped and Derek reluctantly pulled away to retrieve the popcorn. Meredith reached behind her, grabbing the bowl. As he poured it in, Meredith grabbed their drinks and a handful of snacks and headed for the living room, where Charlie was waiting for them curled up in the pile of blankets on the couch.

"Comfy?" Meredith asked her dog, laughing. He was certainly spoiled, but they were at work so often that they tried to make their family time special. Charlie wagged his tail happily while Meredith set the food and drinks down on the coffee table. "Want to sit on my lap? That way Daddy has to get refills and figure out the DVD player..." she whispered to him. Charlie immediately crawled onto her lap when she sat down. "Such a good boy," she praised him, scratching the top of his head.

Derek walked into the living room with the bowl of popcorn and the heating pad. When he gently laid it on her abdomen, Meredith took his face in her hands and kissed him fully on his lips. "Thank you."

"Love you," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"Love you," she repeated, popping a piece of popcorn into her mouth. "What do you want to watch?"

"Doesn't matter," Derek shrugged. He walked over to the entertainment system and began looking through the stacks of DVDs they had. They consolidated whatever movies they had when they moved into the house, and it made for a pretty interesting collection. Derek, of course, had the classics. Meredith's contributions were a bit more varied, lots of horror and romantic comedies, along with a few boxes worth of surgery tapes. Picking a movie to watch was always interesting. "Well, we've got The Godfather?"

"No," Meredith said, shaking her head.

Derek pulled another one from the stack. "The Departed?"

"No."

"Fight Club?"

"Are you kidding me?"

Derek laughed. "Fine, how about one of yours?" He looked over the collection and grabbed the first one of Meredith's that he saw. "Never Been Kissed? You actually like this?"

"It's a cute movie," Meredith said defensively as she took a sip of her iced tea. "What else is there?"

"Sex and the City?"

Meredith pondered for a moment. "Hmm...maybe."

"Please don't make me watch that," he begged, laughing.

"There's sex scenes in it. I thought guys liked things like that," Meredith said.

Derek shook his head. "Not me. The only sex I'm interested in is the sex with you."

"Romantic..." Meredith teased. "Fine. Something else then."

After a few more suggestions and the accompanying "no's," Derek came across a tape that he assumed was one of Ellis's surgeries. But when he saw the words "Meredith's Fourth Birthday" written across the tab, he studied it curiously, wondering if Meredith even knew it existed. "Mer?"

"What?" she asked, grabbing a few cookies from the bag. "Something good?"

It was probably a little risky, bringing up something like this given Meredith's history, but Derek knew she would get suspicious if he avoided it. "I uh, I found a tape...your fourth birthday."

Meredith nearly choked on her snack. "Huh?" she asked. "Like, a home video?" She never would have guessed that her parents video taped anything even remotely family-ish. The Grey's weren't exactly the sentimental family on the block growing up.

Derek reached across the coffee table and handed it to her. "Looks like it," he nodded. "You've never seen it before?"

Meredith shook her head slowly, examining the tape in her hands. "No," she answered softly. "I uh..."

"We don't have to watch," Derek said quickly.

"No, I want to," Meredith countered. "Why not?"

Derek pursed his lips together and nodded. This could go one of two ways: disastrous or actually sweet and touching. His money was on the former, but still, he found himself inserting the tape into the VHS player Meredith insisted on taking with them to the new house. "You sure?" he asked, checking once more.

Meredith nodded and patted the couch. "Yes. Now come sit before I eat all the food."

Derek raised up off his knees and took his seat next to her on the couch. "Okay, he chuckled. He grabbed a handful of popcorn. It wasn't often that he snacked on junk food, but he rationalized that Meredith needed help eating it.

The sound of static infiltrated the living room and gray lines rolled over the screen before they tape began playing. Derek felt Meredith tense up a little upon seeing her little four year old self, Thatcher talking to her from behind the camera. He leaned over to kiss her cheek. "You're so cute," he laughed. "I love the pigtails."

"Shut up," Meredith smirked. But she was still a little nervous, even if she tried to play it off. From the looks of it, though, it didn't seem to be anything too scary. Derek couldn't help but smile. Meredith was a beautiful, bright little girl. He hoped their own daughters were just like her one day.

_"How old are you today, Meredith?" Thatcher asked happily from his spot on the floor in front of her. _The camera work wasn't the best, but it was expected for a home video.

_Meredith smoothed her hands over the front of her pink sun dress and smiled at her father. "Four," she said, holding up the correct amount of fingers._

_"You're all grown up, huh?" he asked as Meredith pulled another wrapped gift into her lap._

_The same giggle she had today erupted through the living room. "I'm only four, Daddy."_

It was strange for both Meredith and Derek to see Thatcher this way. At one time, Meredith had been his little girl. Those two were all each other had. Inseparable. It still hurt her to think that he left without saying goodbye, essentially leaving her with a mother who only used her for revenge on her father. But still, Meredith held those happy memories in her heart, for they were all she really had. Maybe in the future, they could mend their relationship. For now, though, remembering what used to be had to suffice. Derek, too, couldn't help but feel angry at Meredith's parents. Having grown up in a close knit family, he couldn't imagine going through what Meredith had gone through, especially at such a young age. He wished there was something he could do to take it all back. But he knew that it was what made her so strong.

_"What did you open so far?" Thatcher asked._

_She held up a stuffed animal cat to show the camera. "A kitty," Meredith announced proudly. "And books. And roller skates. And um..." she pondered. "...Oh! A surgery kit like mommy's." Meredith held up the large rectangular box with a play stethoscope, doctor coat, blood pressure cuff, and all sorts of other medical equipment made for little kids. _

Derek smiled. Even at age four, Meredith had a passion for medicine. He gave her a little supportive squeeze. So far, nothing out of the ordinary. Ellis hadn't yet made an appearance at her daughter's gift-opening, but that was practically expected.

"_When are your friends coming over for your party?" _

_"Saturday," Meredith said with a smile. She hopped up and walked over to the pile of gifts to retrieve another one. Her pigtails bounced and her bare feet smacked against the floor. A little girl without a care in the world. No reason at all for her to sense what would become of her family. "And we have games, too!"_

_"Yeah? What kinds of games?"_

_Meredith played with the frills of her dress as she thought of what fun things she and her father had planned for her special day. Ellis wasn't really involved in birthday plans, but Thatcher always put in extra effort to make his daughter's birthdays special. "Uh...a pinny-ata, and...pin the tail on the donkey. And musical chairs. And water balloons!" she stated excitedly._

_"That's going to be fun," her father agreed._

"You two were close," Derek pointed out.

Meredith ran her fingers over Charlie's fur, doing her best to keep the tears at bay. Thatcher was her best friend when she was little. The one that tucked her in at night, read her bedtime stories, and comforted her when she was upset. The only parent she'd really ever felt a connection with. Ellis was always in and out of the house, occasionally drove Meredith to school, but wasn't involved like her father was. And now they were both out of her life. It was hard to pretend something like that didn't hurt.

"Yeah, we were," Meredith said quietly.

_"Can we have cake now, Daddy?" an impatient Meredith asked, giving her dad a smile that she knew he wouldn't be able to resist. _

Derek knew that they're own one-day-down-the-line daughter would have the same affect on him. That she'd win him over with no effort at all.

_"How about we save the cake for later? There's cupcakes in the kitchen--the ones we bought at the bakery yesterday. Are they okay?" Thatcher asked._

_Meredith hopped up onto her feet and nodded. "Okay!" she squealed. "Want one, Daddy?"_

_"No thanks, princess," he said warmly. Meredith ran off out of the camera's view and into the kitchen. Thatcher set the camera down on the coffee table, about to turn it off momentarily when Ellis entered the room. She couldn't be seen, just heard._

Meredith swallowed a lump in her throat when she heard her mother's voice. It was the voice of a younger, more energetic Ellis, but still a voice Meredith would always remember.

_"Where's Meredith?" Ellis asked._

_"She's uh...in the kitchen getting cupcakes," Thatcher replied. "How was work?"_

_"Exhausting," she replied shortly, dropping down onto the couch and picking up Meredith's new stuffed animal. "Did you buy her this?"_

_"She really wanted it," Thatcher explained as he cleaned up some of the discarded wrapping paper on the floor._

_Ellis set the pink elephant down and smirked. "Spoiling her."_

_"Hi, Mommy," Meredith said with a smile. From where the video camera was set on the table, only her torso was visible, but when Thatcher picked up the camera again, both Meredith and Ellis came into view. "Want my cupcake?"_

_Ellis twirled her finger through one of Meredith's pigtails and smiled. "No thanks, button. But I appreciate you asking__," she said, patting the seat next to her._

This seemingly sincere, nice mommy side of Ellis nearly shocked Derek. He was expecting anger, wrath, apathy--certainly not motherly gestures and nicknames. He smiled; knowing Meredith had some good memories of her mother to hold onto was so important to him. "Button?" he asked curiously.

Meredith shimmied closer to him on the couch. Perhaps for warmth or comfort, maybe both. Derek wrapped his arms around her and she melted into him. "That's what she called me."

"That's sweet," Derek said softly, kissing the side of her head, just above her ear.

_"I got a doctor kit! Just like you, mom," Meredith said excitedly, slipping off the couch to retrieve it. She walked back over to her mother, the large box dwarfing her. Ellis lifted her up onto the couch and Meredith moved closer to her. "It has a white coat and everything..."_

_"Are you going to be a doctor like me?" _

_Meredith nodded enthusiastically. "Uh huh. A surgeon," she said, wise beyond her years._

_Ellis leaned down and kissed the top of her four year old's head. She was even smiling, seeming to be proud of her daughter._

Meredith felt the tears well up in her eyes. She couldn't help but wish she had watched this video years ago. Her parents did--do--love her. At one time, they were a happy family. And Meredith had vowed long ago that if she ever had a family of her own, she would do things differently. And she would. Derek noticed her tears and wiped them away with his thumb. "Want me to turn it off?" he asked, concerned.

She shook her head. "No, it's just...seeing my mom. It's weird."

"Want to talk about it?" Derek asked. Meredith squeezed his hand, running her finger over his wedding band. Maybe it was the estrogen overflow, but she couldn't hold back the tears that continued to fall. There was never a need to hold them back in front of Derek, so she didn't.

"I just miss her sometimes, that's all," Meredith sniffled, accepting the tissue box Derek handed her.

Derek ran his fingers through her hair comfortingly. "Of course you do. And that's fine. You love her."

Charlie hopped up from his spot on Meredith's lap and licked her cheek. He, too, always wanted to protect her, just like Derek. Meredith giggled a little. "Thank you, buddy."

_"I have another gift for you, sweet pea. I'll be right back," Thatcher said, setting the camera down and exiting the room. When he returned a few moments later, Meredith squealed in delight._

_"A wagon!" she gasped, hopping off the couch to run over to her father._

_"Now we can use it when we go to the park after preschool," he added. He balanced the video camera on his shoulder with one hand, and with the other, helped Meredith climb over the side. She knelt down, pulling her dress daintily over knees._

_"Really?" she asked._

_Her father nodded, the camera bobbing up and down with the gesture. "That's why I wanted to get it for you."_

Derek recalled the framed picture Meredith kept on her nightstand. Her in the pink dress, sitting propped up in a wagon. Ellis leaning against the tree behind her, and Thatcher holding onto the handle. He smiled; there was a reason that picture was her favorite, and now he knew why. "Your picture..."

Meredith bit into a cookie and nodded. "Yeah."

"I never knew that was taken on your birthday," he said. These little details about her were things he always found fascinating. He would never grow tired of learning about her.

"It was the last birthday I celebrated before my dad left and we moved. That picture reminds me of when we were happy--or as happy as a family full of Grey's can be. I found it in a photo album when I was unpacking my mom's boxes and framed it," Meredith explained softly.

"I love that picture," Derek said. He laced her fingers with his and smiled. "Every time I look at it, I see our daughters, well, our future daughters. Beautiful just like you."

"We were cute kids," Meredith boasted teasingly. She carefully adjusted Charlie on her lap and scooted back on the couch until she was lying between Derek's legs, her head against his shoulder. Derek wrapped his arms around her torso and hugged her close to his chest. He could never get enough of his wife. And snuggling up with her and their dog on the couch was quickly becoming his new favorite past time.

Derek leaned down and kissed her neck. "We were," he agreed amusedly.

"Is it weird that I wish it was July?" she sighed, resting her hands over the heating pad draped over her abdomen. "Because I kind of do."

"Me too," he murmured against her skin. "We have to use up all the condoms before then."

Meredith laughed. "Do we really have that many condoms in the house?"

"Well, the cookie jar stash was just refilled. Then there's the ones in the end table in here, and the ones in the laundry room...glove compartment of the car...ones we keep near the shower just in case...and all the ones in our bedroom," Derek grinned. Their sex life was healthy, to say the least.

"We should invest stock in condoms. We'd make a fortune," Meredith said jokingly.

She craned her neck so she could kiss him, and Derek kissed her back, splaying his palm over her cheek. "We should," he breathed. If Charlie wasn't resting comfortably on her lap, Meredith would undoubtedly be sprawled out on top of her husband, kissing him senseless. Derek dropped kisses on her mouth, cheek, then finally settled on her neck again. He knew all the spots that made her shiver. Meredith's skin prickled as his stubble grazed her and she leaned further into him.

"Thank you," she whispered, wrapping the blankets snugly over the two of them. Meredith really wasn't a cuddler before Derek came along, but now she could easily spend the day curled up with him. He was always so warm and comforting and he held her. She really loved that.

Derek kissed her shoulder, smiling. "For what?"

"Making sure I never have to worry about ending up like my family. I always wondered if the same crap that happened to my parents would happen to me. But with you...I don't even...I never worry about that stuff. You're the one thing in my life I never gave up faith on," she said, a smile tugging on the corners of her mouth.

"I never gave up faith on you, either," Derek whispered, wrapping his arms snugly around her. "I love you so much."

Meredith closed her eyes, listening to his heartbeat as it thudded in his chest. Sometimes she wondered what she'd done right that life had suddenly turned in her favor. She felt blessed. All the time. "I love you too."

**I'm slowly banking updates for this, so I'll be able to post more often. And I have a few one shots bouncing around in my mind, so I'll be plenty busy this summer. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Reviews make my day! :)**


	53. Stressed & Sick

**Disclaimer: I wish.**

**Thanks for the reviews. I really appreciate them!**

**Oh, and George and Izzie are and will remain healthy and alive in this. Not sure if that matters, but I just wanted to let everyone know. Enjoy the chapter! :)**

Seattle Grace always got a little crazy this time of year. The end of October kicked off the holiday season, with the bizarre traumas that rolled in until New Years. And this year was no exception. Chainsaws, drunk teenage pranks, the normal holiday idiocies. Meredith wasn't sure if it was the full moon, or mere coincidence, but it seemed like the pit had been overrun for a week straight. Today's chaos wasn't the result of anything out of the ordinary, but as Meredith tied her hair back into a ponytail and walked briskly into the ER, she knew today wasn't going to be an easy one.

There was an accident involving fourth graders going on a class trip to the aquarium downtown. Meredith hated this part of the job. Seeing people in pain was bad enough, but when they were little kids, it was always worse. "What do we have?" she asked, grabbing a yellow trauma gown from the rack.

Alex turned on his heel to face his friend; a look a relief washed over his face when he saw her. "Thank God someone answered their damn pager," he sighed, helping her tie the back of the gown. "Lots of cuts and bruises. Some might have broken bones...doesn't look like anything too serious, but I don't know," Alex replied.

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She and Alex ran outside to meet the ambulance; both bracing themselves when the ambulance approached the bay. As soon as it pulled up, the two of them ran over and opened the back, waiting to get the information from the EMTs.

"Ashley O'Neill, age ten, no signs of head trauma, just some cuts and bruising. She's a little shaken up" the EMT rattled off as they removed the girl from the ambulance.

"Sweetie, can you hear me?" Meredith asked.

The sound of another ambulance approaching interrupted her and she looked to Alex. "You got her?" he asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah," she replied, beginning to wheel the girl into the hospital doors. "Sweetie, can you tell me your name?" she asked again.

"Ashley...but my brother..." she said weakly.

They rolled the gurney into one of the trauma rooms and Meredith looked to the girl sympathetically. "You have a brother?"

"He was next to me...on the bus," the little blonde girl replied.

Meredith's felt her heart sink a little at the news, not knowing of her brother's whereabouts. "Okay, I'll keep an eye out for him. What's his name sweetheart?"

"Justin," Ashley said, beginning to cry. "I don't know where he is."

A nurse entered the room and Meredith looked over at her, anxious to find the little girl's sibling. "Can you page me if a little boy named Justin O'Neill is admitted? She has to be checked out."

"Sure," the nurse nodded, turning around and re-entering the chaotic ER.

"Okay, Ashley, my intern is going to check your injuries. I'll be back, okay?" Meredith explained as one of her interns came into the room. "She's alert and responsive, just a little shaken up. Try to keep her happy and page me if there are any problems," she said to him.

After the little girl was on her way downstairs, Meredith grabbed fresh gloves from the box and ran back outside to meet the next ambulance. "What have we got?" she called out.

"Justin O'Neill, age ten. He appears to have head trauma and went unconscious en route," the EMT informed her.

Meredith looked at the young boy on the gurney and shook her head. "Damn it," she whispered, instantly seeing the resemblance between the two children she was now caring for. "Page Shepherd," Meredith called out to one of the nurses at the nurses' station once the boy had been wheeled inside.

As Meredith was taking down the boy's stats, one of the nurses ran into the room. "Dr. Shepherd, the other Dr. Shepherd isn't answering his page. Do you want me to page Dr. Levinson?"

"Okay," she responded. "I have to take him down to CT, so could you tell him to meet me there if he can?"

"I will," the nurse said with a nod before leaving the room to tend to another patient.

Meredith let out a deep breath as she wheeled the gurney out of the room. Derek wasn't answering his page? She knew he had an early surgery this morning, and may have been taking a quick nap in the on-call room, but Derek always answered his pages. Right now though, her husband's whereabouts would have to be pushed to the backburner, at least until she had a minute to herself. While making her way to the elevator, she noticed Mark on his way to the pit. "What happened, Grey?"

"Bus accident. Lots of little kids, lots of broken bones, lots of chaos," Meredith said quickly as the elevator doors opened up.

As she waited for it to take them upstairs, she sighed heavily and brushed some hair off her face. The little boy on the gurney was still unresponsive when she re-measured his GCS. The elevator seemed to make a slow crawl up to the fourth floor, and Meredith really wished it hadn't been a bus accident. Hurt little kids always ruined her day. When the doors finally opened, she quickly rolled the gurney down to CT, praying that she had gotten there first. From what she had briefly surveyed down in the pit, there weren't many immediate traumas; it was mostly just black eyes and lacerations. Nothing that required the use of X-ray.

The technician admitted the child, and as she waited, Meredith knew she had to go back and tell the little boy's sister that he was okay. Well, maybe not okay. But at the very least, receiving care. "Can you page me when he's finished? I have to go back down to the ER. His sister...she was asking about him," Meredith asked in a rush. The man gave her a nod, and without another thought, she hurried back downstairs.

She walked back into the Ashley's trauma room, thankful that they hadn't yet moved her to a bed out in the ER itself. "Ashley, your brother is upstairs getting a test done. He's going to be okay," Meredith assured her. Maybe not such a good idea. But scaring her wasn't going to do any good. "I'm sure mom and dad will be here soon, okay?"

The little girl nodded solemnly, obviously frightened by all of the chaos going on around her. And it didn't go unnoticed by Meredith. "Hey," she whispered. "I know this is scary, I know. But everything is going to be just fine, okay?" she comforted, tucking some blonde strands of hair behind the girl's ear.

As Meredith went to turn around, the little girl pulled her back by her scrubs. "Don't go," she whimpered. Bedside manner was part of the job, she told herself. What kind of doctor would she be if she left?

"Okay," Meredith conceded, sitting next to her on the exam table. "I won't." Ashley scooted closer to Meredith and she wrapped her arm around the child without a second thought. Her mommy instincts surprised her sometimes. "Dr. Reynolds, there's a little boy up in CT. Justin O'Neill. I need you to go upstairs and check on him. If there's any bleeds, I need you to page Dr. Shepherd. If he doesn't answer, page Dr. Levinson," she told her intern.

He nodded enthusiastically. "Right away."

"Thank you," Meredith said softly. If Alex caught her in here simply sitting down with a little girl, she knew it would piss him off. But she just couldn't bring herself to leave. Meredith knew what it was like to feel like you had no one. Scared, alone, confused. That was her life for years. The silence that filled the room wasn't doing any good, so Meredith decided to make conversation. Helping ease the child's fear was just as much a part of her job as practicing medicine. "That's a pretty necklace," Meredith complimented.

"I got it for my birthday," Ashley said quietly. She rested her head on Meredith's shoulder and Meredith smiled.

"What else did you get for your birthday?" Meredith asked.

The little girl thought for a moment before speaking. "I got a soccer ball...and an iPod...and I got a puppy, too."

"You got a puppy?" she said excitedly, hoping her enthusiasm would rub off onto Ashley.

"Uh huh. Her name is Daisy," Ashley said, a small smile tugging on her mouth. "She's really funny."

"I have a puppy too. He drives me nuts sometimes, but I love him," Meredith giggled. She quickly glanced out the window of the room. No signs of Alex coming to kill her. Things were good.

Ashley laughed a little too. Soft, hesitant, like maybe she shouldn't be laughing due to the trauma going on all around her. "What's his name?"

"Charlie," Meredith said. "My husband wanted to name him Toby, but I said no."

"Toby is a silly name," Ashley agreed.

"My husband can be very silly sometimes," Meredith teased. Speaking of Derek, where the hell was he? The first thing she planned to do when Ashley's parents showed up was to go find him. If the Chief knew he wasn't answering pages, he was in for a serious lecture. And Meredith really wanted to save him from that if she could. "He works here too. I just can't find him."

Ashley looked up at Meredith quizzically. "You can't?"

"Nope," Meredith laughed. "He's probably down here somewhere. This is such a big hospital, sometimes it's hard to keep track of him..." she joked.

Ashley laughed. The little girl seemed beyond her years, taking to Meredith about Derek. Why does crap always happen to the ones that least deserve it? Luckily, Ashley's parents showed up around the same time Meredith's intern was paging her about Justin. Meredith sighed heavily when he told her there was a minor bleed in the little boy's brain. It could be easily fixed, but brain surgery on children always carried with it extra risk.

Once she was sure that Ashley was in the care of her parents, she went on a search for Derek. Dr. Levinson was available, but Meredith really wanted Derek to be the one to do it. Dr. Levinson was a very capable, confident surgeon, but she always wanted her husband to be the one to take kids' cases. It didn't matter that they weren't their own children; Meredith knew that with Derek, they were given the best care they could receive.

"Mer!" Alex called, handing his chart over to a nurse as he walked up to her. "Where the hell is Shepherd? I've been paging him for an hour."

"I don't know," Meredith shrugged. Now she really had to find him. Worrying about Derek frazzled her nerves, even more so than a day spent in the ER. "I paged him, too. I'm on my way to find him."

Alex sighed. "Can you do me a favor and page Iz? Or O'Malley or Yang. I need help down here," he said, grabbing another chart off the stack and heading over to another occupied bed.

It seems the universe just didn't want her to leave the ER today. Meredith couldn't leave Alex hanging though, so she dutifully paged her three friends, waiting until one of them answered. She nearly jumped for joy when George responded, saying he'd be down in a minute to help. George was dependable to follow through on his promises, so Meredith didn't bother to wait for him to come. Instead she ran towards the staircase. It would probably get her there faster.

Meredith sprinted up the stairs two at a time until she reached the fourth floor. No signs of Derek in the hall, patient's rooms, or at the nurses' station. She sighed; Derek picked a really bad day to go AWOL on her. When she reached the on-call rooms, she decided to check them out, just in case he was in there. The one on the end had been dubbed "theirs." The one they slept in when their on-call shifts happened to fall on the same night. She pushed the door open and saw a sleeping figure under one of the blankets, curled up in the fetal position.

Derek.

She rolled her eyes. Had he really been that lazy not to answer his pages? Meredith walked over to him and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Derek," she whispered. Part of her wanted to scream at him to wake his ass up, but she stopped herself. He was still Derek, and she couldn't bring herself to do that. She loved him too much. "Derek," she said again, gently rubbing his shoulder.

He groaned in response, curling himself up even more under the thin blanket. Meredith frowned and placed her hand on his forehead. Definitely feverish. And from what she could see in the dimly lit room, he even looked a little pale. "It's okay," Meredith comforted, running her fingers through his hair. "I'm here."

"Mer," he murmured into the pillow. Meredith noticed he had his pager clutched tightly in his left hand, and she gently removed it, pushing it out of his fist like a Jenga block. She set it down on the nightstand and crawled into bed next to him. Derek melted into her touch as soon as she wrapped her arms around him. "Sick..." he breathed.

"I know," Meredith soothed. "It's okay." She gently threw her leg over his body, effectively hugging him like a teddy bear. He would do the same for her. "What hurts?" she asked softly.

"My stomach...my head. I feel like crap," he sighed.

Meredith immediately felt guilty. Of course, slipping away from her doctor duties wasn't so easy, especially not today, but she still wished she would have been in to check on him sooner. She knew he needed the comfort of her body next to his. "Okay. Just rest."

"I have a surgery but..." Derek said weakly, running his hand over his face.

"I'll page someone else to do it for you," Meredith said. She threaded her fingers through his hair. After stressful days at work, that always relaxed him. Somehow she knew he'd appreciate it now. "You're in no shape to operate over open brains."

Derek nodded in submission. "Okay," he sighed. "Thank you."

"Are you going to be okay here for a few minutes?" she asked, keeping her voice low. "There was a trauma, so I need to let the nurses' station know that you're sick and can't work."

"Yeah. I...I'll be fine," he responded. Not so convincing, but Meredith knew she couldn't stay.

Before she left the on-call room, Meredith pulled the blanket from the top bunk bed and draped it over her husband, trying to keep him warm. She pressed a kiss to his forehead. "Okay. I'll be back. Love you," she whispered.

"Love you," he echoed.

Meredith quietly slipped out of the room and shut the door behind her. The bright lights from the hallways weren't going to help his headache. When Bailey saw her heading for the nurses' station after leaving the on-call room, she rolled her eyes. "Is Derek in there?" she asked.

"Oh. Yeah...he's uh," Meredith began before Bailey interrupted.

"I don't want know about the sexcapades that went on. Just tell him to get his ass down to the pit. We've still got traumas rolling in," she said quickly, depositing a stack of charts in the bin.

"We weren't having--he's sick," Meredith said. "I think he might have the stomach flu or something. I just found him in there sleeping."

Bailey's face softened. She could tell Meredith was concerned, so she decided to help her former resident out. "Okay, uh...I'll go check on him and call in a prescription. You need to go cancel his surgeries. The ER is still a mess, so I need you to page the neuro fellows and have them take over down there. And be sure to cancel all of his electives...schedule them for later in the week," Bailey rattled off quickly as she began to walk over to the on-call room.

"I'm on it," Meredith nodded, turning on her heel and heading toward the nurses' station. It didn't take long for her to do everything Bailey had instructed her to do, but when Meredith got a 911 page from Alex, she wasn't so sure she could sneak out of here with Derek so soon. There was no way she could leave her friend stranded. Alex was loyal. And she knew that she had to be, too.

She knew that she could trust Bailey to look over Derek, at least for the time being until she could get one of her friends to take her place down in the pit. Meredith returned to the ER as fast as she could. The chaos hadn't subsided since she'd last been there. If anything, things seemed even more out of control. "Alex!" Meredith called.

"Remind me never to answer a pit page ever again," he groaned, handing her a patient chart. "That kid you took up to CT...he needs surgery. Did you find Derek?"

"He's sick," Meredith answered. Of all days for Derek to succumb to illness, this was a pretty bad one. "He's in no condition to operate. I paged Levinson when I was upstairs. Where's George?"

"Surgery. The bus driver came in with half his damn leg falling off. And of course O'Malley gets to scrub in..." he vented. "Anyway, the kid. Justin. He was admitted under your intern's care, so you're probably gonna have to scrub in on his surgery."

Meredith sighed. Normally, a chance to scrub in on brain surgery would excite her. But today, it felt like a chore. Maybe it made her a crappy doctor, but she really would prefer taking care of her husband than her patients. "You could scrub in for me. I could sign him over to you...if you wanted to."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because. Derek is sick, and I was hoping I could get out of here early and go home with him. Justin's surgery is going to take hours...hours that could be spent in the OR instead of down here," she said, trying her best to sound convincing. "Cristina and Iz have to be around here somewhere. They could take over for me so I could leave."

"During your shift?" Alex asked.

Meredith shrugged. "I was on-call last night, so I can't work past four anyway. Hospital policy. Do you want the surgery or not?"

"Want it. Obviously," Alex said. The fainting trace of a smile came over his face. Probably the first one he'd cracked in hours. "Thanks, Mer," he said graciously, running off toward the elevator to meet Dr. Levinson in surgery."

Meredith smiled a little to herself. She was a good briber, which was definitely helpful on a day like this one. As she walked toward the nurses' station, with the vain hope that one of her friends would be kind enough to replace her down here, Cristina walked through the doors of the pit, tying her gown around her waist. "Wow. It's a mess down here," she stated plainly. "Anything good?"

"Lots of cuts and bruises. George and Alex each got assigned to a surgery, and I need to take Derek home. So I need you to cover for me down here," Meredith said, trying her best to make sure it sounded like she meant business, although she was pretty sure it sounded more like disguised begging.

Cristina looked at her with her signature blank stare. Babysitting a bunch of whiny little kids with scrapes was hardly how she'd prefer to spend her day. "Seriously?"

"Cristina, please," Meredith said, handing over the chart Alex had given her. "I'm your best friend; don't make me beg."

"You're already begging," Cristina laughed. She accepted the chart and flipped it open. "Oh, yay. A sprained ankle," she said, the sarcasm dripping from her tone of voice. "You're lucky I'm your person."

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah," she dismissed. "Go, I've got it." As Meredith headed for the staircase she'd been running up and down all day, Cristina stopped her. "What's wrong with McDreamy?"

"I don't know. Stomach flu, I think," Meredith responded.

"Have fun with that," Cristina smirked. She turned on her heel and headed for the waiting room without another word. Meredith just laughed. Her friend always had a way of making situations more humorous than they probably should be.

As Meredith trudged down the hall toward the on-call room, she wondered how many calories she'd burned in the past few hours. Over a thousand? Running all over the hopsital was certainly great cardio. She saw Dr. Bailey wave her over, so Meredith walked toward her before going to see Derek. "How is he?" Meredith asked.

"Seems to be a touch of the stomach flu. I called down to the clinic. They have a prescription for an anti-nausea med. waiting for you. You can pick it up on your way out. There's really nothing else we can give him. He just needs fluids and rest...typical flu protocol," Bailey said.

Meredith smiled. "Okay. Thanks, I really appreciate it," she said graciously. "I'll uh...sit in there with him and update charts until my shift ends--if that's okay..."

"Go home, Grey--Shepherd," she corrected herself. "You know how whiny men are when they're sick. No better than little boys. It's best to get him home so he can rest. Last thing we need around here is a flu outbreak. I've got you covered," Bailey nodded.

"Thank you," Meredith breathed. She hardly thought those two words could express her gratitude, but Bailey didn't seem to mind helping her out. The Nazi side of her always seemed to soften around her former interns. She backtracked toward their normal on-call room and quietly pushed the door open. Derek was sitting up in the bed, running his hands over his face.

"Hey," she whispered, sitting down next to him. "Ready to go home?"

Derek nodded, his eyes heavy with the need for sleep. "Yeah--what about your shift?"

"Dr. Bailey knows we're leaving," Meredith said, pressing her lips to his temple. "Let's go grab our stuff, then we can go, okay?"

"Okay," he replied weakly. He ran his hand over his stomach and groaned. Seeing Derek in pain was probably harder on her than the actual ache was for him. Meredith grabbed his coat and pager, then gently pulled him up off the bed. Her goal was to get from point A to point B. The on-call room to their own bed. Taking care of her husband was in the vows. And there was nothing she'd rather do.

--

After wrangling Derek, their belongings, and his medicine, nearly an hour had passed, and Derek looked even more queasy when they finally walked through the front door of the house. Charlie immediately scurried over to the two of them, overjoyed that they were home early. Their puppy adored them; they often felt guilty about leaving him for such long hours, but knew that came with the job.

Meredith smiled when Charlie brought her his hamburger toy from his dog bed in the living room. Both of her guys needed her attention, it seemed. "Come on, Charlie. Let's go upstairs," Meredith called to him. The puppy ran upstairs ahead of him, the toy clutched in his mouth. By the time she and Derek reached their bedroom, Charlie was already making himself comfortable, squeaking on the fuzzy toy. "Do you want to take a shower? You'd probably feel better," Meredith suggested, running her hands up and down his arms.

"Yeah," Derek nodded. The bags under his eyes overwhelmed his normally bright features. Meredith stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his forehead, as if to kiss it all better. "I would kiss you back, but I don't want you getting sick," he laughed weakly, pulling his shirt over his head.

"That's okay. You can make it up to me when you're better," Meredith smiled. They walked over to the bathroom. As Derek undressed and tossed his clothes into the laundry basket, Meredith grabbed him a towel off the rack. She set it on the handle of the sliding glass door. "Do you want me to make you something to eat? Or get you some ginger ale?" she asked.

Derek shrugged. "Yeah, I guess."

"Okay," Meredith said, gently squeezing his hand. "Take your time." She exited the bathroom, closing the door on her way out. As expected, Charlie followed her down the steps and into the kitchen. "You want a treat, little guy?" she asked, kneeling down and scratching the top of his head. "I wish we could be home this early every day." Meredith got a dog treat from the box in the cabinet and handed it to him. "Daddy will probably stay home with you tomorrow."

Charlie eagerly accepted the bone and sat down on the kitchen floor, happily chewing on it while Meredith walked over the refrigerator for something to eat. She hadn't eaten anything today, thanks to all of the chaos down on the ER, and then having to bring Derek home. Sometimes life got in the way of eating, which sucked, especially when she could really use the energy. She eventually settled on a cinnamon raisin bagel, thinking she and Derek could split it. While it was toasting, Meredith pulled the cream cheese out of the fridge. Bagels weren't worth eating unless they were covered with it, at least in Meredith's opinion. She spread some over her half and left Derek's side dry. The last thing she wanted to do was upset his stomach even more. She poured two glasses of ginger ale and set them on a tray along with the bagel.

"Come on, Charlie. Let's go back up to bed," Meredith called. Charlie ran ahead as usual, as if to clear the way for her. The shower turned off as soon as she sat down on the bed. She flipped on the TV. It was rare that they watched television at all let alone this time of day. Meredith sighed as she flipped through the channels. Soap operas, talk shows, game shows, cartoons. As her hope for finding something watchable was dwindling, Meredith got an idea. She hopped up off the bed and ran downstairs.

Meredith pulled _The Departed _DVD off the shelf. It was one of his favorites. She liked it because of the man candy. Win win. When she entered their bedroom, Derek was pulling on a pair of sweats. He looked a little better after his shower. It seemed some of the sicky hospital-ness had been washed away. But he still didn't look like he usually did. Meredith walked over and kissed his cheek. "I got us a bagel. And some ginger ale," she said.

Derek smiled gratefully and kissed the top of her head. "Thank you." When he saw the DVD in her hands, his smile grew. "Are you really going to watch that with me?" he asked, pulling a tee shirt over his head.

"I am," Meredith replied. She put the movie into the DVD player, then she too pulled a change of clothes from her own dresser.

Derek smirked at her. "Am I getting a free show?" he asked.

"Would that make you feel better?" Meredith giggled.

"It would, actually." He set the tray on the nightstand and pulled back the covers on the bed.

Meredith simply shrugged and wiggled out of her jeans. She really had no problem walking around naked in front of him. Naked was comfortable for them. "Okay, then." She unbuttoned her blouse and let the material fall to the floor before she removed her bra.

"I love you. You know that?" Derek asked, his tone much more light than it had been since she'd found him in the on-call room. Meredith really hoped the meds were kicking in and he would be feeling better by tomorrow.

"Because I strip for you?" she teased. Meredith pulled her Dartmouth tee from the drawer and slipped it over her head, followed by a pair of her pajama pants. Derek retrieved the tray from the nightstand and set it on the bed over his lap.

"Well, there's that," he said, slowly sipping on the ginger ale. "But mostly because you're you."

Meredith crawled into bed next to him and instantly melted into the sheets. It felt like she hadn't sat down in ages. She could even feel her body settling in for a long nap. Rest was hard to come by these days. "I love you," she whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to his temple. He still felt warm, but his color was a little better. "How are you feeling?"

"Crappy," Derek answered honestly. "But this'll help. Thank you."

"I should be thanking you," Meredith said, taking a bite of her bagel. "If you weren't sick, I'd still be down in the pit with sore feet and an empty stomach..."

Derek took a small bite of his half, making sure to get the all clear from his stomach before eating more. "Pretty bad?"

"Yeah," Meredith breathed, licking a bit of cream cheese off her finger. "Little kids in a bus accident. It's so much harder with kids..."

Derek nodded in agreement. "Yeah, always is."

"This little girl--Ashley--she didn't even care about getting herself checked out. She just wanted to know where her brother was," Meredith said sadly. "Turns out, he had a brain bleed. You and I were supposed to be on the case. But I gave it to Alex."

"You gave up a brain surgery?" Derek asked. Though Meredith hadn't yet declared a specialty, he knew her niche was neuro. Every brain surgery she scrubbed in on thrilled her.

Meredith shrugged. "Well, I couldn't leave you in the on-call room. So I asked Bailey if I could sit in with you and update charts until my shift ended, but she said we could go. I think she knew we were both frazzled," Meredith joked, taking a sip of her drink.

Derek wrapped his arm around her and gave her a gentle squeeze. It wasn't a big gesture, but it still meant something to him. "Thank you," he said softly.

"You're my husband," Meredith replied. "You'll always come first." She rested her head on his shoulder and pulled the covers around them. Charlie was sprawled out on Meredith's legs. It was always so cozy in their bedroom. Meredith smiled at the thought, then grabbed the remote off her nightstand. "Movie?"

"Okay," Derek agreed. She pressed the 'play movie' feature on the DVD, and the opening credits came over the screen. Meredith wasn't particularly interested in the plot, as she and Derek tended to have different tastes in movies, but it was still a relaxing way to spend an afternoon.

When they had finished off their bagels, Meredith set the tray down on the floor. A little over an hour into the movie, she could tell that the medicine combined with the food in his system was making Derek drowsy, despite his efforts to stay awake and watch. His eyelids were fluttering and Meredith leaned over, pressing her hand to his forehead. He felt warmer than before, which was a side effect of the anti-nausea medication he had taken. "Be right back," she whispered.

Meredith walked into their adjoining bathroom and grabbed a wash cloth off the shelf. After rinsing it under cold water, she turned off the knob, rung out the cloth, and returned to their bedroom. She smiled sympathetically at her husband. It didn't matter that he was sick; sleepy, pajama clad Derek was still adorable. She crawled back under the blanket next to him. "Come here," she said softly. Meredith lay back on the pillows and gently pulled him to her so that his head was resting on her chest. Derek didn't protest in the least. When she pressed the cool wash cloth against his forehead, he sighed and wrapped his arm around Meredith's torso. "Love you," he managed to get out before slipping into much needed sleep.

She knew the proximity of her body, the lull of her breathing would help him feel better. It was rare that Derek needed to be held and soothed, for he was most often the comforter, but Meredith enjoyed taking care of him. It felt good to be able to comfort him. He'd done it for her in the past, and would in the future.

"I love you too," she said. "Just go to sleep. I'm right here." Meredith ran her hands through his still slightly damp curls, massaging his scalp with the pads of her fingers, occasionally kissing the top of his head. As she held him, the love of her life, in her arms, Meredith felt consumed with this overwhelming love for the man in bed with her. The kind of love that she'd only ever felt with him, and only ever would. She pressed her lips against the top of his head once more and let herself succumb to the sleep that her body had been yearning for. While it was hard for her to see Derek sick, Meredith had to admit, bedtime at four in the afternoon was pretty damn nice.

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Reviews make my day. :)**


	54. Bad Day Made Good

**Disclaimer: Last I checked, I didn't own it.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them. :)**

The last time Meredith had slept for twelve hours straight was...maybe in college. So getting the chance to do it again was something she'd gladly welcome with open arms. After falling asleep with Derek while they were watching the movie in bed, neither of them had woken up until early the next morning. Derek woke to a gurgling, nauseous feeling in his stomach. And Meredith woke to the sound of him emptying the contents of it.

Charlie was still snuggled up at her feet, looking happy as a clam. He really didn't have a care in the world. Meredith kissed the top of his head before gently removing her body from the bed, careful not to disturb him. Meredith softly padded into the bathroom. Only the night light was on, so it was still fairly dim, but Meredith could still see him hunched over the toilet. She wasted no time in kneeling down next to him and rubbing his back. "It's okay," she soothed. "You're okay."

"Oh Mer," he sighed, flushing the toilet then running his hand over his eyes. The color had since drained from his face, and his eyes were heavy and tired.

Meredith stood up and got him a small glass of water to rinse his mouth. "Spit it into the toilet," she said after he'd swished the cold water around in his mouth. Derek laid his head down on her lap. She could feel his hot breath against her abdomen as he breathed in and out. "You could have woken me up," she whispered, cradling his body as she'd done the day before.

"You needed sleep," Derek said. His lips felt pasty and he had the chills. And right now, Meredith was the only thing that could comfort him. "You...go back to bed. I'm okay."

"The alarm is going to go off soon, anyway," Meredith reasoned. There's no way she could leave her husband on the bathroom floor. She felt his forehead, noticing the beads of sweat that knitted his brow. She really wished she could take off with him today, but doing so was next to impossible. "You're warm, Derek."

Derek sighed heavily into the fabric of her shirt. Even doing that had to have taken great effort. "I feel like crap."

"I know," she said softly. "After you get back into bed, I'll get you another pill. Then you can just sleep. You can't work today, so you just need to rest, okay?" Meredith didn't want to make it sound like he was helpless; she just knew that he needed to be taken care of. Just as he'd do for her.

"Okay," he conceded. Apparently, he wasn't in the mood for a debate, and Meredith was thankful. The last thing she wanted to do was pick a fight was her sick husband at five in the morning.

Meredith kneaded the muscles in his shoulders and neck, hoping to relieve some of the tension he held in his body. "How long have you been in here?"

"A half hour or so," Derek answered.

"Want to get in the shower? The warm water will help you," Meredith suggested, really hoping she didn't sound naggy. When he didn't answer, she tried again. Derek looked significantly better after his shower the day before, and if there was a chance she could get him feeling like that again, she'd just have to make it sound more appealing. "What if I showered with you...helped you. I wanted to get one before work anyway, so instead of wasting water, we could both get in..."

Derek licked his lips before speaking. "Okay," he nodded weakly.

With a little effort, Meredith managed to get them both back on their feet. She grabbed two towels and turned on the hot water spray. Their shower was large enough to fit them both with extra room to spare. She quickly pulled off her own clothes and tossed them in the hamper. Her body prickled with goose bumps as the cold air hit her her. Derek, too, managed to get himself undressed, then took her hand as they stepped into the shower, so neither would fall. The last thing they needed was a trip to the ER.

Meredith hugged him close, her breasts pressing against his chest. It normally would have been a turn-on, one that ended with Meredith's legs wrapped around his waist as they both came down from their mutual sex highs. Now though, it wasn't about sex. It was about caring and comfort. She knew the skin on skin contact always made them both feel better. As the water rained down on them, Meredith pressed her cheek against his.

She grabbed his shampoo off the rack and squirted some into her hands. She knew he was perfectly capable of taking care of himself, but something inside of her felt this need to care for him, so she did; Derek let her. As she lathered it through his curls, Derek managed a weak laugh. "I can do that, you know."

"I know," she nodded. "I want to."

"Okay."

Derek decided to return the favor, so he washed her hair too. Meredith had to smile. Sick or not, he always knew exactly how to touch her. They washed their bodies off; the sudsy soap pooled at their feet before it swirled down the drain. After getting dried off and dressed, Meredith made him get back under the covers. She would have done anything to join him under there, but any more dawdling and she'd surely be late for work. Meredith quickly put on a pair of jeans and a red shirt, then pulled her wet hair back into a ponytail.

"I'm going to go get you some toast with jelly. That should help your stomach. Do you want some more ginger ale? It's only five thirty, but..." Meredith asked quietly as she sat on the edge of the bed, running her fingers through his hair.

"Yeah. That's fine," he yawned. "Thank you."

Meredith kissed his forehead then exited their bedroom. Charlie had since woken up, eager to go outside and get something to eat. Within minutes, Meredith had gotten Derek's food, taken care of the dog, and was walking back upstairs.

"Here you go. I'll leave it on the nightstand. After you get something in your stomach, take your pill," she instructed, pulling the covers over him.

Derek found the nurturing, hovery side of her completely adorable. He really couldn't love his wife any more than he did. "Okay," he nodded. "I will."

"I'll call you at lunch. And if you need to call me for anything, you can," Meredith said, nervously biting her lip. "Are you sure you don't want me to call out sick with you?"

"No, go to work," Derek said encouragingly. "I'll be fine. I don't want you having to work three nights on-call in a row just so you can stay here. I'm fine, Mer."

Meredith pressed a lingering kiss to his forehead, wishing desperately that she could kiss him on the lips. But she didn't want to risk anything, for having them both home sick in bed wouldn't do anyone any good. "I should be home around six," she whispered. "Just watch TV or sleep or something. Rest so you can feel better. I love you."

Derek wrapped his arms around her and she did the same. It was these small moments of intimacy that they both cherished. "I love you too."

--

Meredith arrived at work with only a few minutes to spare before rounds. All of her friends watched as she frantically changed into her scrubs and ran her fingers through her damp head of barely brushed waves. It wasn't until she was pulling it back into a ponytail that she noticed her friends eyeing her curiously. "What?" she asked, clipping her ID badge to her coat pocket.

"Why do you look all skittish and weird?" Izzie asked, sipping on tea in her pink mug.

"I do not," Meredith argued. "Derek is sick, so I was just busy this morning, rushing around making sure he was okay before I left..."

Cristina rolled her eyes and sighed. "He still has a tummy ache?"

"He has the stomach flu. And a fever. And was throwing up at five this morning. Don't mess with me today," Meredith reprimanded. She realized she hadn't had time to make a pot of coffee this morning and sighed. Without coffee, she was no good at doing her doctoring. "Damn. Coffee," she groaned.

"Bailey's gonna be here any second," Alex said.

Meredith dropped down on the bench and ran her hands over her face. No coffee, no make-up, no time to run a brush through her hair. She could already tell this was going to be a challenging day. "You're not sick, are you?" George asked, concerned.

"No, I'm not. Just tired," she breathed. When Bailey entered the room, they all sat up straight, ready to hear whatever news Bailey needed to give them.

"It appears that there's a stomach flu going around...I'm guessing that's how Shepherd caught it. So I need one of you to volunteer yourselves over in the clinic to treat incoming flu patients--and bring your interns with you. I can't...choose which of you gets to go, so fight if out amongst yourselves. Hunt needs someone down in the pit, Torres needs someone for an ankle allograft, I need someone covering Shepherd's post-ops from this week, and one of you has to go up to peds. for a leukemia case on a nine year old boy. I'm not assigning who does what. I trust you to make the decisions on your own. You're third year residents. You need to start thinking about a speciality in the next few months. Think of this as an exercise in delegation," Bailey said with a nod. She gave them a small smile than turned to walk out of the lounge.

"I call Shepherd's post-ops," Cristina announced, raising her hand high.

Meredith looked to her curiously. "You realize that there's really no "op" involved with post-ops, right?"

"Well, I don't want to spend my day in the pit, the clinic, ortho, or with little kids. So yeah..." she shrugged.

"I know the most about Derek's patients, so I think I should take that," Meredith argued. "He wanted me to call him and update him, too."

"I'm taking the peds. case," Izzie announced, briskly running out of the lounge before any of the others could rebut.

Alex sighed. "Well, I'm not getting stuck in the clinic all day, so I'm taking the ortho case," he said.

"Fine, then I'll take the pit," George announced. He grabbed his coffee and his coat and walked out the door. "See you later!"

"Don't make me fight you for post-ops," Cristina said dryly. "That would make us both look pathetic."

Meredith put on her sad face. "Please, Cris? I've experienced enough stomach flu for one week. I need a change from what I'm going home to tonight..." Cristina remained stone faced. Apparently, she was immune to Meredith's pleading. "Fine. Why don't you send Lexie over to the clinic? She's capable of being over there by herself."

"I could..." Cristina said, rolling the idea over in her mind. "But then what do I do?"

Meredith shrugged. "Troll for surgeries? I'm sure Mark has something..."

"Right. Like I want to help him give someone a boob job," she scoffed. "Fine. I'll go over to the clinic. Maybe I'll get lucky and someone will have flesh eating bacteria or something..."

Meredith shook her head at her friend's warped sense of thrills. But at least she won Cristina over and got to work on Derek's post-ops. "That's the spirit," she smirked.

"You owe me!" Cristina called out as the two exited the lounge and walked down opposite sides of the hall.

"Yep..." Meredith called back.

--

As she was making her rounds through her post-op patients, Meredith finally found a minute to head down to the coffee cart for some much needed caffeine. It was nearly ten o'clock before she had the chance, which had to be a new record for her. She paid for the extra large cup, filled the black liquid with the correct amount of cream and sugar, then made her way back up to the surgical floor.

So far, all of Derek's post-op patients were doing well. Dr. Levinson was on hand in case an emergency arose, and Meredith found herself rather bored. She tucked herself behind the nurses' station with a handful of charts to update, hoping none of her interns would come looking for her. She didn't need the extra annoyances today. She jumped a little when Cristina let her charts smack against the top of the counter. "Damn it, are you trying to give me a heart attack?" Meredith gasped, holding her hand against her chest.

Cristina shrugged. "At least I'd get to scrub in on your surgery if you did..."

"Nothing exciting happening?" Meredith surmised, signing her name to one of the charts before depositing it back on the cart.

"No. Not even a broken bone. I have Lexiepedia over there now giving flu shots and cleaning up vomit. How about you?"

Meredith looked up at her friend. "Nothing. Well, charting. Besides that, slow day."

"Yeah," Cristina sighed. They both would prefer OR action, but it seemed Seattle Grace was staying tame today. "So...Joe's tonight?"

"I would, but Derek still isn't feeling well. I wanted to get home after my shift," Meredith said apologetically.

Cristina was silent for a few moments before she opened her mouth to say something. "What?" Meredith asked when she said nothing.

"Seriously? You know what, nothing. Whatever. I have to go." Cristina dismissed. She grabbed her stack of charts and walked towards the elevator without another word.

Meredith rolled her pen between her fingers. Was Cristina really annoyed with her? The last thing she needed was to fight with her best friend. She sighed heavily and tucked her pen back into her pocket. That would have to wait to be dealt with later. Just as she stood up and was walking toward the elevator to head down to the cafeteria, her pager blared.

_911. Mr. Malloy. Rm 2850_

Meredith recalled from her rounds this morning that Mr. Malloy was post-op from an aneurysm removal two days before. He was an older man, but seemed to be doing well when she checked on him a few hours ago. She rattled off possible reasons for the 911 page as she ran towards his room. _Another clot? A stroke? Torn stitches?_

The code team was already underway when she entered the room. Mr. Malloy's heart was flat lining despite the paddles sending shock waves through his heart. "Charge to 360," Meredith ordered, taking over the paddles.

_No luck._

"Charge again," Meredith said.

_Still, no change._

"Starting compressions," she announced, handing off the paddles before pumping on the patient's heart with her hands. _Derek liked this guy. She couldn't let him die on her watch_. "Damn it," Meredith sighed. Five minutes later, his heart hadn't begun to beat on it's own. She brushed some hair off her face, then bit her lip. Calling a time of death was always hard, no matter what the circumstances were. "Time of death: 12:17 PM."

Meredith left the room solemnly. It was wrong to blame herself, she knew. But the feeling that she could have done something to prevent it was always in the back of her mind. "Can you please page Dr. Levinson and let him know that Mr. Malloy, the post-op from 2850, passed away a few minutes ago? I suspect it was a stroke."

"Certainly," the nurse nodded, putting the phone to her ear and contacting the neuro fellow.

She walked toward the elevator, wishing she could be home with Derek. Being snuggled up with him was a much better alternative than calling time of death and dealing with her friend who was quite possibly pissed off at her. Alex joined her as she waited for the elevator doors to open. "Hey," he smiled.

"Oh. Hey," Meredith sighed.

"You okay?"

Meredith managed a weak smile. "Oh. Yeah. It's just...Derek's post-op patient just died. And now I have to call him and tell him. Plus I think Cris is mad at me for wanting to go home and take care of my sick husband than go to Joe's with her," she rambled, effectively rolling her problems off onto her friend.

"Crappy day," Alex stated as a fact. Meredith really liked that about Alex. He didn't sugarcoat things, but he always knew how to sympathize with her.

"Yep," Meredith nodded. "You going to lunch?"

Alex pushed the button for the second floor after they stepped onto the elevator. "Yeah. Iz wants my opinion on wedding flowers. Wanna come join in on the torture?"

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, that actually sounds good."

The two spent the next half hour discussing possible flower arrangements for the wedding Alex and Izzie were planning. Meredith knew this would be way more of a production than her and Derek's wedding, which consisted of under twenty guests, a simple white dress, and small ceremony out on their land. This upcoming wedding wasn't scheduled for months, but Izzie wanted everything to be perfect, right down to the butter arrangements. And as the maid of honor, Meredith was being roped into everything. She didn't mind though; Izzie had been a tremendous help in her wedding, and Meredith was happy to return the favor.

George got pulled into a surgery, which explained his absence at lunch. But when clinic-bound Cristina didn't show, Meredith wondered if she had maybe gotten busy, which she doubted, or if she just wanted to avoid talking to her. Towards the end of her lunch break, Meredith found an empty hallway and called her husband.

"Hey," he said when he answered. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay. How are you doing? Do you still feel sick?" she asked.

Derek sighed into the phone. "A little."

"Did you get sick again?"

"Yeah, I did," Derek admitted. "But I'm fine. Just a little nauseous. I don't think I have a fever anymore," Derek said. He definitely sounded better than he had this morning, but his voice still sounded weak.

Meredith chewed nervously on her lip. She really hated that he was at home while she was here, but that was part of being a surgeon. "So um...Mr. Malloy? Your post-op patient...we think he a stroke."

"I know," Derek said quickly. "Dr. Levinson called to let me know. He told me you were the one to call time of death. Mer, don't feel guilty. That's a common complication."

Meredith sighed. "I know."

"You sound sad. Everything okay?" he asked, the concern evident in his voice.

She had to give him credit; he always knew what kind of day she was having by simply her tone of voice or the look on her face. "Yeah, it's just...Cris is pissed at me, probably because I didn't want to go to Joe's with her tonight."

"You can go to Joe's with her, Mer," Derek said encouragingly. "I'm fine here."

"I know, but I want to come home. I like taking care of you," Meredith said with a shrug. "I mean, I know I haven't been hanging out with her as much since we've been married, but she has to know that you come first, right?"

Derek thought it over for a moment before he spoke. "I think...maybe she's just having a tough time with it. Before we got back together, you two were with each other all the time. Maybe she's just feeling left out..." he said, running his hand over Charlie's fur, who was sitting in his lap.

"Maybe," Meredith agreed, rubbing a scuff mark off the floor with her shoe. "I'll talk to her."

"Okay," he whispered. "Love you."

Meredith smiled softly. "I love you too. Bye."

"Bye."

--

At the end of her shift, Meredith was changing back into her clothes, more than happy to be going home. Charting and pronouncing someone dead and worrying about what was going on with your best friend didn't make for the best day. And the lack of Derek hadn't helped either. Cristina dropped down onto the bench next to her and set her books and pens down on her cubby shelf.

"Hey," Meredith said softly.

Cristina kicked off her shoes, not bothering to look over at her friend to acknowledge her presence. "Hey," she said shortly.

"So I was thinking...we could go to Joe's this weekend? Izzie, George, Alex--we could make a night of it," Meredith suggested, extending the olive branch.

"Whatever. If you're busy don't worry about it," she replied. "Wouldn't want to impose..."

The sarcasm dripping from her voice made Meredith's heart thud faster in her chest. Rather than skirt the issue, she decided to face it head on. "Okay, you're mad at me. I'm sorry I can't hang out tonight. You know I would if Derek wasn't at home hunched over the toilet."

"Since when? Since when would you choose a night with me over a night with him?" she challenged.

Annoyed had quickly escalated into angry, and Cristina's comment stung her all over. "I..."

"Exactly," Cristina nodded, pulling off her scrub top. "You don't."

"I know you two aren't each others' biggest fans, but he _does_ like you. He didn't marry me to get revenge on you. You're my best friend and he's my husband. I love him. I took vows to him. And when he needs me, I need you to be okay with it. And I really don't think I should have to apologize for that," Meredith said, her voice louder than she intended. But she knew that it had to be said.

Cristina turned back towards her cubby and pulled her jeans from inside. She finished changing her clothes without another word. Meredith started shifting things around in her own cubby just to drown out the overwhelming silence in the room.

"Whatever. I'll see you tomorrow." She grabbed her coat and scarf, then walked out of the lounge without saying anything more.

Meredith leaned against her cubby and closed her eyes. Her day had gone from okay to bad to worse in a matter of a few hours. The only thing keeping her from breaking down was Derek. Going home, getting under the covers, and letting him hold her always made things better. And she was determined to make it happen.

--

The house was quiet when she got home, at least the downstairs. Meredith wondered if Derek had been downstairs at all today. Charlie had a doggy door to let himself in and out, so she doubted anyone had been down here since she left the house over twelve hours ago. She set her bag down and kicked off her shoes before putting the soup she'd bought on the way home on the kitchen counter, then jogged up the steps to check on Derek.

"Hey you," she said with a soft smile, leaning over to kiss his forehead. Nothing more than a low grade fever now. "You look better."

"I had some saltines and ginger ale. Bland and tasteless, but at least I'm not as nauseous anymore," he said. Derek gently pulled her down onto the bed next to him and wrapped his arm around her. "How are you?"

Meredith groaned. "Let's just say I should have stayed home with you today..."

"That bad?" he asked rubbing her back with his fingers.

"Well, if you keep doing that, it'll help," she giggled, melting into him even more. Not even five minutes had passed and her day had already improved. She _really_ loved her husband.

Derek kissed her temple and continued his massage. "What did she say?"

"That I choose you over her all the time," Meredith frowned. "I don't, do I?"

"No, you don't," Derek said, shaking his head.

Meredith felt Charlie transfer laps from his to hers and she smiled. "Hey, buddy."

"What did you say?" he asked.

"That you're my husband, and I shouldn't have to apologize for wanting to be with you," Meredith replied, scratching the dog behind his ears. "I know we'll get over it, but I...fighting with her sucks..." she sighed.

"Just give her time. I'm sure that by tomorrow, she'll be fine," Derek assured her. He kissed the crown of her head and she closed her eyes, taking in his proximity, letting herself unwind. "I know you feel bad, but you shouldn't. You're right. You know it and she knows it."

Meredith just nodded into his shoulder. He always had a way of seeing the silver lining. "Okay," she whispered.

"You hungry?"

Meredith counted back in her mind the last time she'd eaten. Over six hours ago. "Yeah," she breathed. "I stopped off and got soup...chicken noodle. When you got it for me when I was sick, it helped, so I thought it would help you too," she rambled adorably.

Derek smiled; they were never far from each others' minds. "Thank you," he said softly. "You didn't have to do that."

"Why wouldn't I? I love you," Meredith whispered. She took his hand an squeezed it. His hands were always so warm. "I'll get it and bring it up here."

"No, I can go down. It's okay," he said graciously as he pulled the covers off of himself.

She quickly replaced them and kissed his forehead as she got out of the bed. "No, I want to. All I could think about today was getting back into bed with you. Stay put; I'll be right back."

Meredith clicked the bedroom door shut behind her and went downstairs to get their food. Eating in bed with her husband was more enjoyable than any night out. Sure, when they occasionally went out to dinner, it was always romantic and fun, but they weren't ones for getting dressed up. Spending an evening curled up under the covers with a bowl of popcorn was one of their favorite pastimes. And on crappy days like today, Derek, Charlie, and their bed were the only things she wanted.

The tray Meredith held contained more ginger ale, which Derek had been drinking for two days along with water, crackers, two bowls of soup, and bread with butter. For someone who previously couldn't boil water, she was slowly becoming a better cook, thanks to Derek, whom she'd been watching make dinner for months. No longer were there cold pizza dinners or left over grilled cheeses; it wasn't gourmet, but she knew how to make the occasional hamburgers or pastas. Meredith always left the fancy meals for Derek. They were more his forte.

"Here we go," she said, setting it down in between their sides of the bed. "I'm going to get changed." Meredith stripped down nude right in the middle of their bedroom then pulled some comfy sweats from both her and Derek's drawers. She had no qualms about letting Derek see her in all of her naked glory. And she knew that if anything, he'd prefer if she walked around naked all the time. She found him watching with a smirk as she pulled her panties up her legs. "I really don't mean for this to be a turn on..." Meredith giggled. "No sex until you feel better."

"What if I told you I was one hundred percent fine and that we could have sex right now," he asked with a grin before eating a spoonful of his soup.

Meredith rolled her eyes, giving him one last peek of her breasts, then pulled on one of her long sleeved tees. "I'd say you were full of crap. And the answer is no."

"What about tomorrow?" he proceeded.

"If you're feeling better. And by better, I mean _actually_ better. Not fake better," Meredith said definitively. She hopped one leg at a time into a pair of Derek's sweatpants, then crawled back into bed with him. "Are you going to work tomorrow?"

Derek shrugged. "My fever is pretty much gone. And I really don't feel that nauseous. I guess I'll see in the morning."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She raised a spoonful of soup to her mouth, letting the flavor dance along her tastebuds. Chicken noodle had definitely been the right choice.

"Sorry you had a bad day," Derek whispered against her temple before kissing her there. The familiar feeling of his stubble on her skin made her smile.

Meredith let out a breath. "It's okay. It wasn't all bad. I got to help Iz with wedding stuff which...was fun. She's planning this big church thing with a poufy white dress and making me and Cris wear some shade of pink with frilly lace whatevers."

"When is this happening?" he asked.

"Next fall...ish," Meredith shrugged. "It's only November, so she has time to plan it."

"Fall, huh?" he asked, smiling. "You and I might be busy making babies still..." Each day that passed was a day closer to when they were going to start trying for a baby. The prospect of starting a family was overwhelming, but thrilled them at the same time.

Meredith mirrored his smile with one of her own. "Babies."

"It could take a few months, but trying'll be fun," Derek said, the smallest of naughty glints in his eyes. "Every morning when we wake up, at work, at home...orgasm-pallooza..."

She laughed. He could always make her laugh after a tough day. That was one of the things she loved most about him. "You make it sound so romantic."

"It'll be romantic. We can set out a blanket in the backyard on a warm night...wine, candles, sex. Personally, I can't wait," Derek grinned, pulling her closer to him.

"Hmm...me either," Meredith sighed contentedly. "We just need to be extra careful about condoms for the next few months. Bailey told us we need to start thinking about specialties. In January, they start scheduling us more in the field we pick. Having to take on extra shifts in neuro along with my normal schedule is going to be crazy enough. Adding a pregnancy to the mix is going to put me over the edge," she giggled.

Derek turned his head and looked to her curiously. "You want to be a neurosurgeon?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "I mean, I like general too. But neuro has always been my favorite." She noticed the smile on his face and couldn't help but smile back at him. "What?"

"Nothing it's just--I'm thrilled. I wasn't sure what you were going to choose because you're good at everything. But I'm just really happy you chose neuro." Derek couldn't help himself. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her close. Choosing a speciality was a major milestone for a surgeon, and he was ecstatic that Meredith had found her surgical passion. "Love you," he whispered, kissing her jaw line.

"I love you too," Meredith echoed, running her fingertips down his back. "So I guess this means I'll get to work with that charming, handsome neurosurgeon more often, huh?"

Derek pulled back from from their embrace a little and smirked at his wife. "He's a world class surgeon, you know..."

"Is he?" she asked coyly as she played with the curls at the nape of his neck. "Well I can't wait to work with him."

"He can't wait to work with you either," he grinned.

After a day like today, a night in bed with Derek was all she really needed for it to end on a good note.

**I'm still slowly banking updates. So sorry for the wait between chapters, but I really hope you guys are still enjoying the story. Reviews make my day! :)**


	55. Mending Fences

**Disclaimer: I wish.**

**Thanks for the reviews. They mean so much to me. :)**

A few days had passed since Meredith and Cristina had fought, and so far, nothing had been resolved. Meredith had tried on more than one occasion to get Cristina to talk to her, but every time, she just blew her off, finding ways to ignore the elephant in the room. Much to Meredith's relief, Derek had since returned to work. The stomach flu was gone and he was more than ready to get back into the OR. Having Derek at work certainly helped make the situation less tense. If she ever needed to de-stress, he gladly met her in the on-call room to unwind. Sex was helpful.

As she lie there above him, she couldn't help but wish they could stay locked inside the on-call room all day. "Thank you," she panted, pressing kisses on his neck. "I really...needed that."

"Me too," Derek breathed. He had his hands splayed over her back, tracing lazy designs with his fingers. Her breasts were pressed against his chest and he could still feel the aftershocks of her orgasm pulsating around him. Meredith rested her forehead against his. This particular round had worn them out.

"How long have we...?" she asked half heartedly. She wouldn't have given a damn if they'd been having sex for hours. A sex break was necessary on a day like today.

Derek thought for a moment. "I don't know. Forty-five minutes?"

He began to remove himself from her but Meredith quickly clenched around him, holding him in place. "Wait. Not yet. Just...for a few more minutes," she said softly, pressing a kiss to his lips.

"Okay," Derek murmured into her mouth. He put his hand against her chest and felt her heart beating underneath his palm. It was quick, the way it always was after sex. He smiled, knowing he did that to her, just as she did the same for him.

"Remember how nice and warm it was in bed this morning?" Meredith asked, her nose brushing against his.

Derek grinned tiredly, one arm above his head and the other threaded through her hair. "Hmm...yeah."

"I wish we were there now." She leaned down to kiss him again, slower this time. Kissing him always gave her the strength to get through the day. And on days like today, she needed all the reassurance she could get.

"Bad day still?" he asked sympathetically, kissing a trail from her lips to her chin, down her neck to her shoulder. Meredith broke out in goosebumps. If the clock weren't ticking down the minutes until she knew they had to leave the safety of the on-call room, she'd for sure be ready for a third round.

Meredith smiled. "You helped. Sex always helps," she said with a giggle that always warmed his heart.

"It does," he agreed, moving his arms to wrap around her body again.

Time was up. She knew the longer they stayed in here, the more suspicious everyone would become. She let out a sigh, then gently helped him withdrawal from her. At once she missed him, the feel of him. He was safe, and he comforted her. "When we get home, I'm dragging you right to bed," Meredith laughed as she reached for her bra.

Derek admired her naked torso for a few more moments before she secured it behind her back. "Fine with me," he grinned. There had never been a time when he'd objected to such a thing, and he doubted he ever would. He grabbed his boxers that had been strewn by the bottom of the bed after Meredith kicked them off his legs.

"Damn, where are my panties?" she panicked, tossing the covers around until she came across the frilly pink material that was sandwiched between the blanket and the sheet. "For a second, I thought you took them," Meredith smirked, hopping on each leg until they were hugging low on her waist.

"Not this time," Derek chuckled, handing her her scrub top. It smelled like her, lavender from her shampoo and a light powdery smell from her deodorant. He smiled; Meredith had in one way or another infiltrated each of his senses. There was always something that reminded him of his wife.

Meredith pulled the light blue top over her head. "Well, I appreciate that. There was no way I was walking around panty-less."

"We can save that for later," he reminded her. They finished re-dressing, and Meredith pulled him to her by the collar of his lab coat.

She wrapped her arms him. "Thank you," she whispered.

"For what?" Derek asked, returning the hug.

"Always making me feel better," Meredith said. It was true; he didn't really have to do much to brighten her day. His presence alone made all the difference. Although, the sex was a nice bonus.

Derek squeezed her closer. "Happy to," he said softly, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I love you, Mer."

She smiled. "I love you too."

--

Unfortunately for Derek, the happy solitude with Meredith in the on-call room had ended the minute they both left, and he had to meet Cristina to review their patient's CT scans. She'd been short with him all day, through rounds, discussing possible diagnoses with their patient, and still now. Technically, Derek could yell at her for the less than pleasant attitude, but for Meredith's sake, he decided to keep the peace.

"Dr. Yang," he greeted, taking the empty seat beside her. The scans came over the screen and they both studied them for few moments before Derek spoke. "Tumor," he pointed. "Pressing against the hypothalamus."

"Are you gonna operate?" Cristina asked.

Derek sighed. "She's twenty-six. It's...dangerous no matter the age, but she's young. If we had caught it even a few months sooner..." he trailed off. "...it's just a bad location. I'm going to have to cut out a lot. One mistake..."

"And she's dead," Cristina finished, always blunt. But also correct. Operating was the lesser of two evils, but procedures like this one were always concerning for even the most capable of surgeons.

"Yeah."

Cristina leaned back in her chair and looked over at him. "So..." Derek had to give her some credit. She could keep things professional despite the obvious tension looming like a dark cloud over their heads.

"I've done it before. Barring any complications, she should pull through," he nodded, scooting to the edge of his chair to make sure he was correct in his assessment. Derek rarely second guessed himself, but there were times when he couldn't be too sure. After a long silence, he let out a breath. "Okay, let's let her know."

Cristina stood up and grabbed the chart off the desk. "Okay," she obliged. They walked toward their patient's room without a word. Thankfully the hustle and bustle of the hospital was enough to make the awkward quiet seem less intense. Derek pushed open the door and smiled upon entering. He found that smiling always helped. "Good morning again, Claire," he greeted. "Mr. Ryerson."

Kevin, the woman's husband, looked to him with a hopeful smile. "What...how were her scans?"

Derek swallowed past a lump in his throat. "Unfortunately, the CT showed that your wife has a tumor pressing against her hypothalamus. It's minor, but because of its location, it's important that we remove it. The tumor is in an area of the brain that controls involuntary functions--breathing, heart rate, body temperature. Letting it grow any longer can be fatal. Surgery...is risky. But I've done this before. And it's the safest option," he said. Letting the patient get all of the facts before they asked questions was something he strived to do as a doctor. And making sure the patient felt comfortable in expressing concern was even more important.

Claire wiped a tear from her eye. Her husband took her hand and kissed the top of it, offering her solace and comfort with his touch. "What kinds of risks? Maybe I could live with it. I mean, the surgery...there's a chance I could die, right?"

"There's always that risk, yes," Derek answered honestly. "But like I said, I've successfully completed this surgery before, and your age works in your favor. Look, I know this is a lot to take in. Dr. Yang and I can answer any questions you have. How about we give you some time to think it over?" he said kindly, offering his patient and her husband a sympathetic smile before he and Cristina left the room.

"What do they have to think about? Without it, she'll die." Though he couldn't be sure, Derek actually detected a small trace of sincerity in her voice. Of course, it could have been mistaken as the the urge to get some OR time as well.

Derek set the chart down on top of the nurses' station and flipped it open. "Just...give them time. She'll have the surgery. They just need to process it. It's a lot of bad news for one day."

"Whatever. I think it's dumb to hesitate," she shrugged. Clearly, Derek had been wrong in his initial reaction to her seemingly genuine concern.

"They're scared," he corrected. "They're young. Newlyweds. It's about more than just cold, hard facts. It's about both of them. Not just the medicine..."

Cristina rolled her eyes, and it didn't go unnoticed by Derek. He knew the fact that he brought up love was just adding to her already obvious annoyance with him and Meredith lately. He sighed. "Can we go off the record for a minute, Cristina?" he asked, replacing his pen back in the pocket of his lab coat. "Look, you and I...I know we're not the best of friends. But you care about Meredith, and she cares about you. So that means I do too. She considers you family, and in some ass backwards way, so do I. She's been upset ever since you two started fighting. And she told me not to get involved, but she's my wife and I love her. So I'm asking you, for the sake of your friendship, please--just talk to her. She needs you."

She stood rigid, unflinching, and Derek wondered for a moment if she'd heard anything he said, then a look of unadulterated shock spread over her face. "Oh God, is she pregnant?"

"What? Pregnant? No..." Of all things he expected her to answer with, that wasn't one of them.

Cristina breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh thank God--no offense. I know you two are planning on knocking her up this summer, but I need a few months to prepare for all the crying and the hormones first."

Derek couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, we uh...we're trying this summer," he agreed, unable to use the words "knocking her up." Somehow that felt like a bad way to describe the two of them conceiving a child. "But that's not...Cristina, please. Just talk to her."

"Fine," she said. "I'll talk to her. But don't expect any breakthroughs."

"I...don't." Extending olive branches and hugging weren't the outcomes he expected, but getting them talking was a start. "Thank you, Yang."

Cristina shrugged. "You're letting me scrub in, right?"

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "It's your case, too."

"If you tell Mer we talked, I'll deny it to hell," she informed him, giving him a warning glance.

He just smiled amusedly. That was the kind of reaction he'd been waiting for. "Got it." Derek handed the patient's chart to a nurse and without another word, the two walked off in different directions down the hall. Maybe some good would come of their little talk. Derek could only hope so.

--

It was lunchtime when Meredith was already anxious to drag her husband back into an on-call room again. Izzie had spread out an array of bridal magazines and caterers and wedding cake bakeries on the lunch table. There was barely enough room for her tray amidst her collection of wedding ideas. Meredith dropped down into her seat and offered Izzie a small smile. "Hey."

"Oh good. You're here. I need your opinion on bridesmaids dresses. Do you know where Cristina is?" Izzie asked excitedly. She'd been smiling for weeks and Meredith wondered where she found the time to practice medicine and plan a wedding. Meredith and Derek's simple afternoon ceremony on their land was a cinch compared to the production Izzie was creating.

Meredith shook her head. "I don't know. We, uh..."

"You two are still fighting?" she asked with wide eyes. "It's been almost a week. Just talk to her already. You two are my bridal party. And if you're fighting, that's going to suck."

"I tried. A lot. She's pissed off at me. I just have to let it run its course," Meredith said, waving her hand in dismissal. "And she's working with Derek today, which is just going to add more fuel to her fire. So...I need to think of something else. Dresses. Let's talk about dresses," she said in attempt to sound excited, but failing miserably.

Izzie turned her head and looked to her friend in pity. "You hate talking about frilly wedding crap. You're a mess. Tell you what, go find Derek, have some sex, then meet me back here in twenty minutes," she offered, flipping through her Modern Bride Magazine.

"We did already. Twice. I need to give him a break," Meredith giggled for the first time since seeing Derek a few hours ago.

"Oh! That reminds me...we're thinking October or November for the wedding. Do you plan on being pregnant then?" Izzie asked plainly, taking a bite of her tuna salad. "Because if you do, I don't want to pick out your dress yet in case you have a little baby bump," she all but cheered, giving Meredith a huge smile.

Meredith looked to her friend with wide eyes and swallowed. "I uh...yeah, maybe. I...we're not trying until summer, so I guess I could be if, you know, Derek and I do the thing..." she rambled.

Izzie nodded slowly. "Right...that's usually how it works," she said with a slight laugh.

When Cristina, George, and Alex approached the table, Meredith started tapping her fingers against her tray. Lunch had been tense these past few days, thanks to their fight, and she had come to dread the twelve o'clock hour wholeheartedly. "Hey," she greeted.

Alex and George took their seats. "Hey," George smiled curiously, picking up one of Izzie's magazine cut-outs and staring at it. "What the hell is this?"

Izzie rolled her eyes. "It's a wedding cake, George."

"Looks like a castle covered in icing," Alex smirked, kissing Izzie on the cheek when she glared at him. He wasn't picky when it came to wedding details. He know how important it was to Izzie, so if it meant he had to look like Prince Charming, he'd do it.

"Mer, can we talk?" Cristina asked after setting her tray down next to George's. She cocked her head toward the double doors that lead to the hallway. Meredith bit her lip then nodded. Talking to each other. That was progress.

She and Cristina walked out into a quiet hallway. When Cristina dropped down onto an empty gurney pushed against the wall, Meredith followed suit then started fidgeting with her watch. "So uh..." she began.

"Look, we don't have to make this into a big...whatever. I'm just tired of being mad," Cristina stated, swinging her legs over the side and staring at the wall in front of her.

Meredith felt the weight being lifted off her shoulders. She exhaled deeply before she spoke. "Me too." A few moments of silence passed between them before she spoke again. "I'm sorry. I know it's...I know that since Derek and I--"

"You don't have to--I get it. He's your husband. It's not just about you. It's about both of you," Cristina finally understood as a light bulb flickered on in her mind. Like her patient and her husband. It wasn't cut and dry when a loved one is in the picture, whether it was making a life changing surgical decision, or taking care of a sick husband with the flu. "I'm sorry," she said graciously.

Meredith turned her head and was met with the soft eyes of her friend, who normally carried a stone faced expression. "Thank you," she said with a nod.

"So we're good?" Cristina asked.

"Yeah," Meredith said softly. "We're good."

"Good."

Meredith bit the inside of her cheek and pondered for a moment. Cristina was working with Derek. Derek's McDreamy tendency to help his wife in any way he could. Aha. "Did Derek ask you to talk to me? And don't lie. I know he has ways."

Cristina sighed in resignation. "Fine, yeah. He did. But don't blame him. I thought you were pregnant, so..."

"Izzie asked me if I was gonna need a maternity dress...for a baby bump," Meredith said dryly. "When did I become the girl who gets asked questions like that?"

Cristina pointed to the wedding ring on Meredith's finger and gave her an amused smile. "Does that sum it up?" she asked with a smirk.

"Yeah," Meredith smiled warmly. "It does, actually." She ran her fingers over her wedding band. Cristina was right; Derek helped her realize she wanted this life without really ever trying to do so. He truly did have ways. And she loved him for it. "Iz wants us to look over dress choices with us. Come on," she sighed, reluctantly hopping down off the gurney. She would have rather found Derek for some more sex, but knew that part of being a good bridesmaid was actually wearing a bridesmaid dress, even if she looked like a Barbie doll.

--

Midway through lunch, Cristina got a page from Derek saying that their patient decided to have the brain surgery. Of course, Cristina was excited to scrub in, but also understood the couple's hesitation. When she saw Derek waiting for her outside of Mrs. Ryerson's room, she decided to swallow her pride and apologize. It might kill her, but for Meredith's sake, she would do it.

"Dr. Yang," Derek greeted with a smile. He pulled a pen from his pocket and wrote down some notes in their patient's chart. When he noticed the peculiar look on Cristina's face, he raised his eyebrows in confusion. "Is everything okay?"

She released a puff of air from her lips. "Mer and I...we...things are good again. Just thought I'd let you know," she nodded quickly. "And that I'm..." she paused. Yeah, this might actually kill her. "...sorry," she murmured.

Derek smiled a little at her admission and his eyes softened. "Thank you, Cristina."

"You're welcome," she replied. After a few moments, she decided the warm fuzziness had passed and she took the chart. "Okay, that's enough. Wanna go..."

"Yeah. Come on," he agreed, pushing the door open to Claire's room. Derek smiled inwardly. He had been hoping for an apology for Meredith, but never did he think he'd get one for himself. It was nice, knowing that she and Meredith could fight, and make it through to the other side. He and Cristina would never be the best of friends, but still, they were a family, and getting along was part of the package.

The surgery had been a success, just as Derek had assumed. He even let Cristina suture, which came as a huge surprise. It almost made her wonder if the whole apologizing thing had its perks, or if Derek was just in a good mood after having been well-sexed earlier that day, like Meredith had told her at lunch. By the time she and Derek had taken Mrs. Ryerson to post-op and explained the outcome of the surgery to her husband, their shifts were nearing an end. And Derek couldn't be more thankful. The surgery was long and tiring, so the prospect of a quiet night in with Meredith was looking better and better with each passing minute.

He found her in the resident lounge pulling on her shoes, all changed and ready to go. "Hey," he grinned. Derek dropped his bag down onto the bench and pulled her close. "I haven't seen you all day."

Meredith sighed contentedly. Derek was always so warm. On a cold November day like today, his hugs were even more comforting. "Hmm...and still, you make me happy," she smiled against his neck.

"What did I do?" he asked, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"Talked to Cristina," Meredith stated. She pulled back a little to study his expression, wondering if he'd own up to it.

Derek smiled. He was busted and he knew it. "Yeah, I did. Sorry. It's just...I knew how it was upsetting you and I wanted to--"

Meredith cut him off with a kiss, her way of letting him know she wasn't mad. When he slipped his tongue into her mouth, she moaned. There was something about kissing Derek that always calmed her down. She could be having the worst day, and the minute his lips touched hers, everything else melted away. She threaded her fingers through his hair, holding it between her fingers. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too," he said after they pulled back for breath. Derek grabbed her coat off the hook in her cubby and helped her put it on. "Ready to go home?"

"Yeah," Meredith said softly. "I am."

--

"Damn it, it's cold out there," Meredith gasped. Derek closed the front door behind them to keep the warm, toastiness of the house inside. The two of them quickly removed their coats, scarves, and shoes, setting them in the foyer. They had only lived there for a few months, but their new house felt like a home within days after moving in.

Derek smiled and ran his hands up and down her sweater-covered arms. "It's warmer in here."

"Hmm...much," Meredith agreed. When Charlie trotted down the steps yawning, she laughed. "Were you asleep, hun?" she asked him, kneeling down and picking him up. The puppy curled into her, licking her chin. He always loved when they got home after work. Every day, he would run to the front door to greet them. A family tradition they'd gotten used to.

"I'm sure he was," Derek grinned, scratching the dog behind his ears. "You hungry?" he asked Meredith.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. Why, you gonna cook for me?" she asked sweetly.

"Don't I always cook for you?" Derek countered amusedly.

"I can make cereal. And toast. And Hot Pockets," she told him. They walked into the kitchen and Derek flicked on the light. The warm, soft lighting was a stark contrast to the dark dreariness outside. The rain pelted against the sliding glass door leading onto the outback patio. "Oh, that reminds me...Thanksgiving is next week, so Izzie asked me to ask you if you'd help her cook. Alex doesn't cook, and me...that would be dangerous so..."

"Yeah, I'll help her," Derek smiled. He scanned the cabinets and pulled out a box of spaghetti. "How's this?"

"Good," Meredith nodded, taking her seat at the counter. "So you don't mind spending Thanksgiving over at the old house? If you don't want to, we could--"

Derek cut off what was sure to be an adorably apologetic ramble. "Mer, it's fine. I want to. They're family. That's what families do," he shrugged.

"Family," Meredith whispered. Memories of Thanksgivings growing up weren't all that warm and fuzzy. But now, she looked forward to every holiday, knowing they'd be spent in the company of her husband and her family. "What about when we have kids?" she asked.

Derek filled the pot with water and set it on the stove. He turned the knob so the flame flickered on, then joined Meredith at the counter with some already breaded chicken that they could be fried up and served with the spaghetti. He smiled as he leaned in to kiss her. "We can still spend Thanksgiving over there. Izzie can have that holiday. But I want Christmas here," he grinned. "When I was little, every few Christmases, we had to drive to my Aunt Gail and Uncle Bob's house. And I hated it. Hated getting dressed up and having to leave my toys under the tree. So we have to call Christmas," Derek chuckled.

"Call Christmas," Meredith echoed, laughing. "Are you twelve?"

"I'm just saying...Christmas is ours. Pajamas all day and playing with toys. You and I sneaking off to have Christmas sex while Izzie and whoever else comes over keeps the kids entertained for a half hour," he said amusedly, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

"Uh huh," she giggled. "Christmas sounds like fun."

Derek set the chicken down in the frying pan then looked up at her and smirked. "Every holiday requires sex. Otherwise, it's not as special."

"Right..." she mused. "Even like...Flag Day?"

"Yes, Flag Day. We're Americans. It's only right that we celebrate," Derek grinned. "Besides, when have you ever _not_ given me sex? Holiday or not, we have sex almost every night."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "True," she conceded. She got up off the stool and joined him at the stove as he poured some spaghetti into the pot. "I think we should take a bath tonight. It's been a while since we've done that," Meredith said softly, kissing his neck.

Derek turned his attention to his wife and wrapped his arms around her. "Love to."

"Is the spaghetti cooked yet?" she asked teasingly, taking the spoon and stirring the pot. Somehow, the pending sex trumped even her empty stomach.

He laughed. "Someone's anxious, huh?"

Meredith trailed her fingers down his back and rested them on his ass. "Naked time is fun. And usually turns porny."

Derek turned the flame up under the pot so the pasta would boil more quickly. "Good point," he grinned.

--

The dishes remained soaking in the sink when Derek carried Meredith up the stairs to their bedroom. Dinner was delicious as usual. Derek really was an exceptional cook, and with Meredith's skills as an assistant who did things like butter bread and make salad, there was no such thing as a bad meal.

He gently dropped her down onto their bed and smiled. "Get undressed. I'll go turn on the water." Derek leaned down and pressed a kiss to her lips before disappearing to the bathroom.

Meredith quickly pulled off her sweater and her jeans, then reached behind herself to remove her bra. She slipped her panties off her legs. After depositing her clothes into the hamper, Meredith walked into the bathroom, remembering to grab two towels off the shelf. "Hey," she said softly, dropping the towels onto the ledge next to the tub.

Derek admired her nakedness for a few seconds then removed his own clothes, leaving him nude next to her within seconds. "Hey. Ready to get in?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. She took Derek's hand and the two stepped over the side of the tub. The water was warm, the perfect temperature to soothe the aches of the day. Derek sat down with his back against the side, and Meredith took her usual seat in front of him, leaning against his chest. "I love you," she whispered, turning her head to kiss him.

"I love you too," he said. Derek reached around to cup her breasts and felt her hardened nipples just below the surface of the water. When he rolled one between his thumb and his forefinger, Meredith moaned. A familiar zing zipped through her core. It took little effort for Derek to turn her on.

"Derek," she sighed, arching her back into his touch. "Oh wow..." she giggled. "We're cutting right to sex."

Derek smiled against the wet skin of her shoulder. "We can hold off and enjoy naked time for a while."

"We couldn't do this stuff in the tub at the old house," Meredith pointed out, turning around to face him. She wrapped her legs loosely around his waist and draped her arms over his shoulders. "My bendiness comes in handy in here..."

Her breasts grazed his chest with every breath, and Meredith could feel his erection stirring between them. "Hmm...it does," he agreed, cupping her face in between his palms to kiss her again.

Outside the rain could still be heard hitting the side of the house. The wind whipped around and the trees rustled from the force. On nights like tonight, Meredith wished they could escape somewhere tropical, burying their toes in the sand in the afternoon and getting tangled in the sheets inside of a cabana every night. She sighed audibly at the thought; Derek smiled. "What?" he asked.

"I want to go away somewhere--not right now, because of work and stuff. But maybe this summer. We get a week off for vacation time. I just think it would be nice..."

"Okay." The smile on his face grew even more. "Where?"

Meredith shrugged. "Somewhere warm. Bermuda maybe, or the Bahamas. We can drink on the beach and make a baby at night. We deserve that."

Derek couldn't help but pull her closer. Whenever she said things like that, his heart went wild in his chest. "I would love to go away with you," he whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Meredith rested her forehead against his. "Okay." Tendrils of her hair had escaped from her mess of a bun but she didn't bother to tie them back up. She knew sex would be happening within the next few minutes and she'd end up soaked with water from head to toe anyway.

Derek trailed kisses from her lips, down her neck and shoulders to her breasts. He pulled a nipple into his mouth and sucked, making Meredith gasp in delight. He knew her body, knew how to make her squirm and beg and call his name in pleasure. They'd memorized every inch of one another within the first weeks of meeting, and the feelings had intensified each time they made love. Meredith threaded her fingers through his hair to lock his head in place. "Derek," she breathed.

She felt his erection pressing against her stomach as she sat on his lap. The feeling was almost too great. But when Derek slipped two fingers inside her, she dropped her head onto his shoulder. "Oh God," she gasped. "Der!"

He pushed the pads of his fingers into her most sensitive tissue, feeling it clench beneath his touch. "Meredith," he whispered, encouraging her. He knew how to work her body. What moans she'd make if her touched here or kissed there. Every response he got thrilled him. "Come on, Mer."

"Holy...Derek," she whimpered, adjusting her hips so that his fingers drove deeper. "I need..."

"What?" he asked softly. He brushed his lips past her ear. Another round of chills erupted through her body.

Meredith licked her lips. "Harder," she demanded. She was never shy about what she wanted. Derek smirked, pushing his fingers harder into her. Soft pants of air tickled his neck and he could feel her pressing her nails into his back as she clung to him. It wasn't long before her orgasm ripped through her, leaving her boneless, her body limp against Derek's.

"Damn it," Meredith gasped. "You're...that was...wow."

Derek chuckled as he pressed his lips to hers. "Hmm, yeah." The smile was quickly replaced with a groan when she ran her fingers over the length of his erection. Just as he knew how to work her body, she was just as good at working his. She lightly grazed him, up, down, up, down, until Derek couldn't take it any longer. He reached for the ledge of the tub and grabbed a condom--one he'd placed there just in case. "Mer, here."

Meredith took it from him, unable to concentrate on opening the wrapper when his mouth returned to her breast. When she eventually succeeded, she licked her lips so she could speak. "Derek, lift up. I can't...you have to..." she managed to get out. Derek's attention to her body was the only thing she could think about.

He raised himself out of the tub long enough for Meredith to apply the condom and gently gripped her hip with one hand to balance her over him. Meredith threw her head back in delight when she sank down on top of him. The moment they came together as one always took their breath away. The pleasure and intimacy they shared never faltered when they made love.

"Oh God. Meredith," Derek groaned, lacing his fingers with hers as she raised and lowered herself. There was little he could do to help as far as movement, so making sure she kept her balance was the least he could do. "You feel incredible."

"So do you," she gasped. Her breath came out in throaty moans. With every few motions, Meredith reluctantly had to stop herself to take in a breath. Sex trumped breathing, something that had never happened before Derek came along. "Holy crap..."

Derek could feel her clenching around him, and knew if she continued doing so, it wouldn't be long before he could no longer hold back. "Mer, I'm gonna...if you keep..." he managed to say.

"It's...I'm almost there," she whispered. Derek reached down and massaged her engorged bundle of nerves in an effort to help her along. "Crap. Crap. Crap," Meredith panted in succession, gripping his hand tighter. "Derek, I'm..."

He forced himself to open his eyes. Watching Meredith succumb to her orgasm was the most beautiful sight he'd ever witnessed. "Come for me, Mer. Just...let it go."

Almost on cue, Meredith climaxed around him. Her muscles clenched in ecstasy around his erection, and Derek felt himself releasing too. His eyes bore into hers as they shared in their mutual pleasure. As she came down from her high, Meredith fell forward onto her husband, letting him support her weight. She'd used every ounce of energy in her body and needed a few minutes to regain the strength needed to even get out of the tub.

"Holy crap," she whispered, pressing kisses to his neck. "We need to...have bath sex...more often."

Derek wrapped his arms around her back and hugged her closer. He could feel her shaking above him. "Yeah. We do," he said, trying to regain his breathing.

When she finally recovered enough from her orgasm, Meredith carefully removed him from her, then stood up and reached for the towel. She started patting herself dry while Derek removed the condom and tossed it into the trashcan a few feet away from the tub. He, too, rose to his feet and Meredith handed him his own towel. "I'm exhausted," she giggled, wrapping the towel around her body before she and Derek stepped onto the bath mat.

"Me too," Derek chuckled. Meredith leaned into him and he wrapped his arm around her waist after he flipped the drain to the tub open. They walked into the bedroom and without a word, Meredith dropped her towel onto the bench at the foot of the bed and crawled under the covers. "Sleeping naked," she yawned, but it was almost a command.

Derek dropped his towel next to hers and slipped into bed as well. When she spooned up against him, her skin was still heated from the bath. They melted into each other; their breathing was synced, and they were happy.

He trailed his fingers over her torso and kissed her bare shoulder. "Are you warm enough?"

Meredith took his hand, lacing their fingers together and letting them rest on her stomach. "Perfect," she whispered.

**I figured we could all use a little porny MerDer lovin' during this summer hiatus. And happy 4th of July to those in the US! Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Reviews make my day! :)**


	56. Thanksgiving

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. I just wish I did. **

**I know I suck at updating. I have about three chapters banked, but that's not enough to be able to post every week. I'm trying my best though; I promise. :)**

Thanksgiving was a holiday for families. At least, that was Izzie's mantra. And because Meredith and Derek were her unofficial family, celebrating the holiday together was a requirement. Tradition...or whatever. Watching football and eating so much food until literally passing out on the couch. Derek had been to countless Thanksgiving dinners in his time; Meredith though, the girl who came from a crap family, didn't really partake in the normal festivities. But now that she was a grown up, it seemed only right that she and Derek trek on over to the old house and do the whole Thanksgiving thing. Even if it meant getting up somewhat early on a day off.

As Meredith pulled on zip-up jacket over her camisole, she had to smile. Derek was excited about today. He hadn't celebrated a true Thanksgiving since he lived in New York, and she knew that if there was one thing he was thankful for today, it was that they were together. Married. Happy. She watched as he pulled a cranberry colored sweater over his head. Very Derek-y and adorable. Seeing him happy almost made up for the fact that they had to leave the warm comfort of their bed earlier than they would have liked, but not before they had a Thanksgiving quickie, per the rule that every holiday requires sex.

Meredith ran a brush through her waves, letting it fall softly on her shoulders. She put on her usual make-up, no muss, no fuss, then slipped on her Ugg boot slippers. Derek laughed when he noticed her footwear, but she just shrugged. "Izzie said to dress comfy. And I plan on lounging around on the couch all day while you and Iz slave away in the kitchen," she giggled.

"I didn't say anything," he chuckled, defending himself. "You look adorable."

"Uh huh," Meredith smirked. She wrapped her arms around his waist, tucking her hands in the back pockets of his jeans. "I know you were going to make fun of me."

Derek tipped her chin up with his fingers. "Was not," he said before kissing her.

"So were," she murmured against his lips. "That's okay. I make fun of you a lot, so it all evens out..."

"Hmm...true."

Meredith pulled back from their embrace and smoothed out the shoulders of his sweater with her hands. "And if it rains, you can carry me to the car."

Derek laughed. "I'd love to."

"Ready to go? Izzie is going to be pissed if we're late," Meredith said.

"Yep, let's go. Come on, Charlie," Derek called.

Charlie hopped out of his dog bed under the window and trotted along behind them out of their bedroom. Bringing him along may have seemed weird to anyone else, but Charlie was a member of their family, and they couldn't leave him behind. A day out would be fun for him.

"Is the wine in the fridge?" Meredith asked as they entered the kitchen.

Booze was Izzie's request for them to supply. Tequila wasn't on the list, but things like wine and beer were asked of them. The lack of tequila was no great loss. Meredith hadn't had a sip of it in nearly a year, and really had no desire to ever have it touch her lips again. It reminded her of the dark place, where things were bleak and miserable. She was past that. Now she was just...happy.

Derek knelt down and hooked the dog's blue leash to his matching collar. "Yep. The beer is in the trunk. It's just the two bottles on the shelf," he said.

"'Kay," she nodded, pulling out the glass bottles and setting them on the counter. "Is that everything? Charlie, wine, beer--oh! Napkins," she rattled off. Meredith took the bag of napkins from the cabinet and put them next to the wine. "I think that's it. If she needs anything, I'll run to the store when we get there."

"Okay."

Derek locked the front door behind them after they left the house, then they walked to the black sedan in the driveway. After putting the items in the trunk, Meredith scooped Charlie up in her arms and opened the passenger side door, depositing the dog on her lap. Charlie enjoyed car rides, and he was always well behaved when they took him along somewhere. Derek took his place in the driver's seat and they began the short trek over to the old house. The roads were fairly empty; most people were still tucked away in bed thanks to the holiday. The drive was easy and they made it there within twenty minutes.

He pulled into their old driveway, parked the car next to Alex's, and cut the engine. "Surprised Karev didn't sneak off to the hospital," Derek joked as they exited the car.

Meredith laughed, setting Charlie down on the ground. "Iz would kill him."

After retrieving the things from the trunk, they walked up the steps. Meredith smiled when she noticed the scarecrow on the porch and various pumpkins lining the wall. Izzie could always be counted on in the festivity department. Derek pushed open the front door without knocking first. There really wasn't any reason to, seeing as it still felt like home. Peach cobbler was the first smell that could be detected, then gravy, followed by something that vaguely smelled like cinnamon. A nice Thanksgiving medley.

"Hey, you're here," Izzie greeted, her hair in a messy ponytail and an apron tied around her waist. "Alex is in the living room watching football, Mer."

"Kicking me into the living room already?" Meredith asked playfully. She unhooked Charlie's leash and the dog ran off into said room, probably eager to make himself comfortable on the furniture. It's what he did best.

Izzie took hold of the wine bottles Derek was carefully balancing on top of the case of beer and smiled. "Thanks for coming early. There's just...a lot of food to cook and I wanted to have an extra set of hands. And Mer always says what a good cook you are..." she rambled. "I hope you don't mind."

"Happy to help," Derek interrupted, giving her a pleasant smile before looking to his wife and smirking. "You brag about me?"

"I like to make them jealous." Meredith winked at him to show that she was teasing, then kissed his cheek. "Go. Cook. Bond, whatever. I'm gonna go hang with Alex. Keeping me away from the kitchen is probably the safest option."

"Hmm...probably," Derek agreed, earning him a playful nudge on the hip.

Meredith walked off into the living room, thankful that she wore her hard-soled slippers. If this is what her day entailed, being comfy was key. She spotted Alex on the couch, feet propped up on the coffee table, watching a football pre-game show, drinking a cup of coffee. Charlie was happily sitting next to him on the middle cushion. It was an adorable little snapshot, actually.

"Hey," she yawned, dropping down onto the remaining couch cushion. "Happy Thanksgiving."

Alex looked over at her and smiled. "Hey."

"You look like you're already in a turkey coma," Meredith teased.

"I wish. I was on call 'til two in the morning. Remind me never to volunteer myself for a holiday shift ever again," he said, rubbing at his eyes with the underside of his wrists.

"At least they're not making us help cook," she giggled. "Derek gets nervous every time I use the toaster."

Alex laughed. "I would too."

"Shut up." Meredith rolled her eyes jokingly. Her cooking had dramatically improved since meeting Derek. It wasn't anything a chef would call a masterpiece, but she wasn't half bad. "I surprised Derek the other night with spaghetti and meatballs. And he loved it so much that we ended up having sex on the counter," she announced proudly.

"TMI, Mer," Alex said amusedly, taking another sip of coffee from his mug.

"Aww, jealous?" Meredith asked. "I could give you some sex details."

He whistled and shook his head. "Hot, but I'll pass. My beast gets fed regularly too," he grinned. "So is there gonna be a baby Meredith here next Thanksgiving?"

Meredith smiled at his question, wondering for a moment if she'd be pregnant this time next year with a baby belonging to her and Derek. "Maybe inside me, not born. Unless, you know, I get knocked up within the next month or two, which isn't the plan by the way."

"Hmm...just can't picture dark and scary Meredith with the spit-up rag over her shoulder bouncing a baby on her hip," Alex teased.

"You gonna babysit for me?" she asked with a laugh, getting a whiff of the cooking turkey from the kitchen. Her stomach growled; the only think she'd consumed today was a cup of coffee. Waiting until three in the afternoon for dinner was highly unlikely. Handouts would be absolutely necessary.

"I'm marrying Iz. I think that's a given," Alex said humorously.

Meredith rested her head on the back of the couch and looked over at him. He was a lot like her. The ones with the crappy childhoods who knew what the dark side looked like. "Ever think we'd end up here?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know...happy?" she asked.

She knew he knew what she meant.

Alex laughed slightly. "No, not really."

"Me either."

"So I'm thinking of asking O'Malley to be my best man," Alex blurted out. "Iz got all teary eyed when I mentioned it to her. But I dunno...do you think he'd do it?"

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. "Yeah, I think he'd be honored."

"Yeah?"

"Yes," she said definitively.

Alex downed the last of his coffee before speaking again. "I was gonna ask you, but Iz said she'd already claimed you as her maid of honor."

"Me?" she asked softly. Meredith hadn't been expecting that one, although, it made sense. Unrelated twins or whatever.

"Yeah. You were the first one who thought of me as more than just an ass. The only one I could talk to. You'd be a good best man," Alex complimented, gently patting her shoulder.

"Thank you, Alex," she whispered, smiling softly at her friend.

Derek appeared in the doorway wiping his hands with a dish towel. "Hey, Iz wants some more opinions on the sweet potatoes. You two in?" he grinned.

Meredith popped up off the couch faster than a piece of toast from the toaster. The prospect of food was too good to be true. "Hell yeah," she giggled.

"Me too," Alex agreed, grabbing his empty mug off the end table.

With Charlie following behind, the three walked back into the kitchen. Bowls and spatulas and pans littered the counters and table, along with tons of vegetables chopped precisely the way Izzie needed them to be. Meredith surveyed her former kitchen with wide eyes. This room of the house had always been Izzie's, but was especially Izzie-ish today.

Meredith took a seat at the island. "What time did you get up today?" she asked, taking a small piece of carrot from a bowl and popping it into her mouth.

"A little after six. I had to make sure the turkey was thawed before I stuffed it," she said before scooping up a pile of chopped celery and dropping it into a colander.

Derek went back to work at the stove, stirring in various vegetables and seasonings into the pot containing the gravy. He caught Meredith smirking at him and he smiled. "My mom's recipe," he said. "Want to try some?"

"Yeah," she nodded. Anything from the Shepherd family cookbook was sure to be delicious, seeing as Derek was highly skilled with his cooking. He retrieved a small saucer and spooned some into it for Meredith.

As soon as it touched her tongue, she moaned in satisfaction. Derek grinned smugly. "Good?" he asked.

"Yes," she laughed, eating some more. "Let them try some."

Derek obliged, spooning out small bowls for Izzie and Alex try some as well. Alex nodded in approval. "Good stuff, Shepherd."

Izzie nearly squealed in delight when she tasted it. "This is better than my grandma's. And that's saying a lot," she said.

"See how talented I am?" Derek asked Meredith boastfully.

She tossed the dish towel at him. "Yeah, you're a genius. We know," she giggled. "When is everybody else coming?"

"George is working until one. Cristina is waiting for Owen's shift to end at noon, then they'll be over. Did you ever ask Lexie if she was coming?" Izzie asked.

Meredith filled up a cup of coffee for herself, swallowing a sip of the hot beverage. "She's going to Molly and Eric's. She invited Derek and me to join, but my dad is going to be there and I...well, I just figured this should be a happy holiday, so I politely said we already had plans here," she rambled. Bringing up her father on Thanksgiving? Probably not the best move. She chalked it up to the tryptophan in the air, making her brain all cloudy with turkey happiness.

"Oh. Okay," Izzie said with a simple shrug. "I guess it's just going to be seven of us then."

"How's your dad doing?" Alex asked candidly, earning him a gentle smack on the arm.

"Alex," Izzie hissed.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully and smiled. "It's fine. He's uh...better, I think. Out of rehab, getting himself back on his feet. It's good...that he's doing better. You know, Laura is little and she should get to know him and..." She was rambling and she really wanted to stop. "So...sweet potatoes you said?"

Derek gave her a sympathetic smile, as if to say _take a deep breath, it's okay_. Being the good husband he is, he decided to steer the conversation back to the food. "Yeah, Iz used this marshmallow-walnut topping and wanted to know if it was too sweet. I figured you'd enjoy it," he winked.

"I'll scoop you both some onto a dish," Izzie said, grabbing two small dishes off the shelf in the cabinet and giving them each a sample of the sweet potatoes. At this rate, all of the food for Thanksgiving would be eaten before dinner. That didn't stop them though. The food looked too good to pass on.

"Oh my God. These are the best sweet potatoes anyone has ever cooked," Meredith complimented while she chewed.

Izzie smiled widely. "Really? Not too sweet?"

"Nope, perfect," Alex smiled, leaning over to kiss her cheek. "Anything else you wanna give us?"

"There's peach cobbler on the table," Izzie said as she turned her attention back to the oven to check on the turkey inside.

"Sweet." Alex hopped off the stool and cut himself a piece. After refilling his coffee mug, he made his way for the exit of the kitchen. "You need any help? Or can I go watch the game?"

Izzie shook her head and sighed amusedly. "No, we're good. Go."

Meredith laughed as she cut her own slice of the dessert on the kitchen table. "So my only option here is to go back in the living room and watch sports with Alex?"

"You can help," Derek offered. Izzie looked to him worriedly, as if the mere suggestion were dangerous. Meredith plus kitchen gadgets didn't exactly go hand in hand.

Meredith noticed Izzie's expression of fear and rolled her eyes. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Iz," she giggled.

"How about she makes the dough for the pie. That's easy enough," Derek proposed, looking to Izzie for an agreement.

"Ooh, that'll save me some time," Izzie nodded enthusiastically. She grabbed the flour, shortening, salt, and some cold water she had chilling in the refrigerator. "You'll need these. And I have my mom's recipe written out on this index card. Very straight forward, very hard to mess up," Izzie instructed.

Derek grinned at his wife. Even the thought of her making a pie from scratch was amusing to him. Of course, he had no doubts that she could do it thanks to the directions, but Meredith wasn't exactly Betty Crocker. "Don't even say it," Meredith said, waving a spoon at him.

"I didn't say anthing," he grinned.

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "You were going to."

"Was not."

"You wait and see...this pie is going to kick ass," Meredith said confidently, studying the index card briefly before she went to work on the dough. The way she mixed the ingredients and kneaded them together with surgical precision made Derek smile. She bit her lip in determination, intensely focused on her task.

He leaned over the island and kissed her forehead. "You're adorable."

"Yeah, okay," she said dryly, looking up briefly from her doughy mixture to smirk at him.

"What? You are," he laughed. "I can't wait to eat it."

"If this conversation is going to lead to sex, it's not happening in this kitchen. It's bad enough we caught you two with your pants down in here before. So if you feel the need to do each other, you know where the bedrooms are," Izzie said plainly, chopping up bread for her stuffing.

Meredith looked to Izzie incredulously. "We're not going to have sex," she sighed. "We already had sex this morning before we got out of bed."

"Meredith," Derek couldn't help but chuckle, turning a light shade of red at her admission. Sometimes she was a little too free with their sex details.

"What? Iz knows we have sex. We used to live here, remember?" she asked with a smile.

"I finally got rid of the earplugs now that the live porn moved out of the house," Izzie laughed.

Meredith gasped, setting down her ball of dough. "We were _not_ live porn..."

"The walls aren't as thick as you think, Mer," Izzie said humorously. "Even _George_ could hear the headboard banging against the wall. And he was at the opposite end of the hallway."

"Fine, we were loud," Derek admitted. "Now that we've established that, who wants to find a new topic?"

"Oh relax. It's funny now that I don't have to listen to it," Izzie pointed out. "You guys ever miss living here?"

Meredith rolled her dough out on the counter, making sure it was nice and squishy, but not too firm, just as the directions had dictated. "Not really," she answered. "We're so used to the new house."

"Now you just need to fill it with kids," Izzie said, almost like it was her own personal request.

Derek laughed; he knew that of all their friends, Izzie would be the most excited when they had a baby. The one that would volunteer herself to decorate the nursery and knit endless piles of socks and hats and sweaters. "We're getting there," he said.

Meredith smiled at her husband. He looked cute like that, standing there cooking, talking about babies. "I love you," she mouthed.

"I love you too," Derek mouthed back.

She never would have guessed, but Meredith found that Thanksgiving was actually fun so far.

--

By the time Meredith's pie was baking in the oven, Cristina and Owen were knocking at the front door. Derek quickly went to let them in, greeting them with a smile. "Hey."

"Happy Thanksgiving," Owen said politely, patting Derek's shoulder. "I uh...I brought a spice cake. Cristina wasn't sure what you were making, so I'm hoping no one made this," he said, handing it to Derek.

"Thank you," Derek nodded. "It looks delicious."

Cristina and Owen removed their coats, then followed Derek into the kitchen. Meredith was busily chopping an onion, sniffling occasionally in an attempt to hold back tears. When Cristina saw her friend actually contributing to making dinner, she looked to her strangely. "Oh God."

"What?" Meredith asked, wiping her eye with her shoulder.

"Please tell me you're getting this on tape," she said incredulously, wasting no time in getting a beer for her and Owen from the refrigerator.

Meredith pretended to be offended by her remark. "Excuse me, I know how to do things. That pie in the oven? All me."

"You made a pie?" she asked.

"Yes I did." The way she said it with such confidence made Derek smile. Apron-clad Meredith really was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen.

"Smells good," Owen complimented. "You guys cooked everything from scratch?"

Derek leaned against the counter and nodded. "Yep. After Mer is done with the onions, we just need to add them to the stuffing, then let it cook. Dinner should actually be on time," he joked.

"Impressive," Cristina nodded, watching as Meredith added the onions to Izzie's bowl with her cutting board and knife. Very _Iron Chef_.

Meredith saw Cristina trying to suppress a smile and rolled her eyes. "Okay, I'm standing right here. At least have the decency to mock me in the other room."

"Not mocking," she corrected. "Just...shocked."

"Mer is doing a good job. I'm proud," Izzie said in her friend's defense.

Meredith untied the apron and set it over the stool. "Thank you, Izzie."

"Hey," George said upon entering the kitchen, Alex following behind him. He too looked a bit tired from his shift like Alex did, but there was no way he'd miss the holiday either. Even if he wanted to, Izzie wouldn't let him.

"Hey George," Meredith smiled. "How was work?"

"Good--busy, but good. Lots of freaky stuff...knife accidents and victims of corn eating contests. Fun stuff," he teased. "So when do we eat?"

"Uh...two hours-ish," Izzie said, glancing at the timer on the oven. "I'll put out some appetizers to munch on. I know we're all starving."

Derek looked to Meredith and gave her a grin. This was what holidays were all about. Food, friendship, and spending time in the presence of people that had become family.

--

Dinner was served promptly at three o'clock, no doubt a result of Izzie's precise timing and meticulous determination of planning when to cook what so everything could be set on the table together. They talked about all sorts of things, mostly work related, seeing as they all shared the similar passion. George's description of the holiday idocies were undoubtedly making Cristina wish she'd gone into work, and everyone else thankful that they didn't have to deal with it.

Nearly all of the food was eaten. Turkey, vegetables, mashed potatoes, stuffing, salad, yams, and biscuits, along with the beverages Meredith and Derek had brought along with them. By the end of the meal, Meredith was feeling a little like a beached whale. Her eyes were obviously bigger than her stomach when she began eating, and now she wondered if Derek would have to carry her over to the couch.

"Full?" Derek asked as he squeezed her hand gently on the table top.

"Yes," Meredith giggled. "I don't even know if I have any room left for my kick ass pie."

Derek laughed, leaning in and pressing a kiss to her temple. "You have to try it. I've been looking forward to eating that all day."

"It didn't look too bad when Iz took it out of the oven," Meredith shrugged.

"It looks like it was professionally made--and I'm not just saying that to flatter you, you know..." he said with a smirk. "It looks delicious."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder, relaxing into her husband. Derek was always so nice to cuddle up to, especially now that the tryptophan from the turkey was running through her veins and making her feel all warm and happy. "Hmm...thanks."

"I love you," Derek whispered into her ear. His breath tickled her, making her erupt into chills.

She smiled at him. "I love you too."

"Want to sneak off to the bathroom? We could probably get away with a quickie?" he kidded. Holiday or not, family time or not, Derek was always intent on getting in her pants. Actually, holidays were all the more reason to have sex.

Just as Meredith was about to give in and let him ravish her against the bathroom sink upstairs, Izzie walked into the dining room with Meredith's apple pie in one hand and the spice cake Owen had supplied in the other. "I have dessert," she announced. "There's ice cream and pastries in the kitchen. Alex, could you get those please?"

"Yeah." Alex stood up from the table and did as Izzie requested, bringing in a stack of bowls, spoons, a large carton of ice cream and a fancily adorned plate full of baked pastries. The desserts looked too good to pass up, so Meredith patted Derek's knee.

"Dessert first. Then sex," she giggled.

Derek pretended to be offended by her comment. "Pie trumps sex?"

"On Thanksgiving," Meredith nodded, passing the plates around the table. "No offense. I just like pie."

"And you wonder why I think you're adorable," Derek chuckled, tucking some hair behind her ear.

"You two may as well do each other on top of the table," Cristina said with a mouthful of cake. "You're practically undressing each other with your eyes..."

Meredith gasped as she quickly removed her hand from Derek's thigh. "We are not."

"You kind of are," George agreed with a laugh.

"They're in love. Leave them alone," Izzie scolded. She handed Meredith a knife and slid the pie in front of her. "You made it. You get the honors of cutting the first piece."

"Okay..." Meredith said slowly. She took the knife from Izzie's hand and carefully cut into the apple pie, making sure to keep it looking nice. If it sucked, she could at least say it was beautifully presented. She set the slice on her plate and took a small bite.

Derek smiled at her. "Good?"

"Yeah, I guess," Meredith said as she chewed. _She_ thought it was actually quite tasty, but in a room full of honest critics, the opinion could be a bit different.

Derek wasted no time in cutting his own slice, no doubt wanting to praise Meredith's pie making skills, even if it happened to be terrible. He put a forkful in his mouth and immediately nodded. "Mer, this is great," he lauded, pressing a kiss to her cheek after he swallowed. "I love it."

"You have to say that," Alex teased. Meredith shot him a glare and he laughed. "Kidding, kidding. I'm sure it's good."

Once the others had received their own slices, even Cristina had trouble finding something to nitpick. Meredith's pie was indeed a success. "Meredith, this pie is wonderful," Owen said kindly.

"It really is," Izzie concurred.

"I'm a fan of it," George said as he chewed.

"You can barely toast a Pop-Tart. How did you manage to make a pie?" Cristina asked amusedly. "Anyway, it's good. I'll give you credit."

"Thanks," Meredith smirked. "...I think."

"It's delicious," Derek beamed. He wrapped his arm around his shoulder and kissed the crown of her head. "Thank you."

"Nice job, Mer," Alex said before taking a sip of his beer. "I'll never doubt your baking skills ever again," he joked.

Meredith smiled at her friends around the table. "Thank you."

Dessert was consumed quickly, at least for both Meredith and Derek. Sex was on the horizon, so eating hastily seemed like the obvious thing to do. No one else at the table seemed to notice, as everyone had branched off into conversations. When Meredith gave the okay, Derek nonchalantly took both of their plates. "I'll meet you upstairs," he mouthed as he stood up.

Meredith nodded subtly so no one would notice and took a sip of her coffee. After a few moments, she carefully planned her exit, hoping to be seated once again with Derek before anyone noticed they'd left the table. She gracefully removed herself from the group and walked out of the room. So far, so good. Once she was out of eye-shot, she made a dash for the stairs, bounding up them two at a time.

She found Derek waiting for her in the bathroom across from their old room, already removing his belt. "Hey," she giggled, locking the door behind her. "We have to make this fast. Like, quicker than a quickie," Meredith said as she shimmied out of her jeans and panties and dropped them to the floor. "Shirts on. It saves time."

"You mean I get no boob action?" he asked with a grin, hoisting her up onto the bathroom sink. He pulled a condom from the cabinet below her. They'd kept a stash down there before they moved out, and it still sat in its same place, next to the shampoo and shaving cream.

"When we get home, I'll show you the boobs," Meredith smirked. "Now hurry up..."

Derek leaned in and kissed her fully, just as he thrust into her waiting body. "Sneaky holiday sex is fun..."

Meredith moaned in pleasure, smiling back at him as they quickly found their rhythm. "Happy Thanksgiving."

"Hmm..." he murmured. "You too."

**I know there's a lot of mixed feelings about Izzie; some love her, some hate her. But she's always been one of my favorites. George too. That's why there's Fab Five stuff in this chapter. I have a feeling next season is going to be full of sad stuff, as far as that storyline is concerned, so it was nice writing the intern family in this chapter, along with Derek and Owen, who I think would be invited to Thanksgiving for obvious reasons. And no holiday is complete without a little MerDer sexing. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter.**

**Reviews make my day! :)**


	57. Can't Stop the Rain

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own it.**

**So, so sorry about the wait. I've been busy these past few weeks. Hope you like this chapter. It's a two-parter. Fancy, huh? :P**

The rain poured down harder than Meredith ever remembered. The drive into work with Derek had taken them twice the normal amount of time, and the two minute walk from the car to the entrance of the hospital had left them both soaked, even though they'd shared an umbrella. December was always a particularly rainy month in Seattle; downed power lines and trees were not uncommon in the least. Dark, gloomy days like this always made it hard to leave the warm comfort under the covers, but soon enough, they'd have four days off for the upcoming holiday season, which had everyone counting down the hours this time of year.

"In my next life, remind me to move to Hawaii," Meredith said upon entering the resident lounge. The ends of her hair dripped with rain water, and her jeans were almost completely soaked through. She set her bag down onto the bench, then proceeded to remove her wet clothing piece by piece. The dry scrubs sitting on the shelf never looked more appealing.

"Damn, did you fall in a puddle?" Alex asked when he and Izzie walked through the door.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Have you not noticed the torrential thunder storm going on outside?"

"I haven't left the building since yesterday morning. On-call last night," Alex explained, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Lucky you," Meredith smirked. "Where are George and Cristina?" she asked. Usually they all met up in the mornings before getting their assignments, so their absence had her suspicious.

"Both in surgery already," Izzie said.

Meredith changed into her scrubs quickly; the soft, dry fabric felt good on her slightly cool skin. "Where were you two?" she asked teasingly.

"On-call room--sleeping," Alex replied nonchalantly, though he knew Meredith saw right through the fib. She and Derek had disappeared into plenty of on-call rooms, and hardly ever for the purpose of sleeping.

"Uh huh," Meredith giggled. "I'll go along with that."

"We'd appreciate it," Izzie said with a cheeky smile, pulling her hair back into a ponytail.

Bailey entered the lounge seconds later with a stack of charts in her arms. Meredith could tell by the tired look in her eyes that their former resident had been up all night dealing with the fall-out from the never ending storm. "Okay. I'm gonna be quick. Hunt and Shepherd need one of you down in the ER to deal with the traumas rolling in from the damn natural disaster going on outside. Dr. Robbins needs one of you for a pediatric heart transplant. And whoever is left gets the pleasure of assisting the Chief with a Whipple." She deposited two charts on the table and yawned. "I'm going to sleep for a few hours. Keep yourselves out of trouble."

"Whipple," Alex called out, reaching for the chart and staking his claim for the case before the other two had the chance.

Izzie scoffed. "What the hell?"

Meredith leaned against her cubby and let the fiancés bicker until they made their decisions. She didn't care what she ended up doing for the day. A Whipple and a heart transplant were great, but working with Derek in the pit wasn't a bad way to spend the day either, so while she waited for them to come to an agreement, she brushed out her damp hair with her fingers.

"Mer, what do you want today?" Alex asked considerately, seeming to notice her waiting patiently.

"Don't care," she yawned before taking a sip of the hot coffee in her mug. The dark, dreary day combined with the fact that she was up having sex with Derek until one in the morning wasn't helping her body rise and shine.

"Come on, you have to have a preference," Izzie insisted.

Meredith laughed. "If I can get some on-call room time with Derek by taking the pit, that's fine with me. And I know neither of you are fighting over that one. So..." she said, pulling on her white coat. "I'll take it." After giving her friends a smile, she exited the lounge and made the trek toward the elevator.

"Hold it, Grey," Mark called out before the elevator doors shut. Meredith pushed the door back open with her hand so Mark could enter, then pushed the button for the first floor.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

Mark sighed. "Pit. You?"

"Pit," Meredith echoed. "Lots of rainy day fun ahead. Were you paged?" She checked her pager to see if she missed anything.

He shook his head. "No, just checking in. Seeing if anyone needs to be prettied up," he grinned.

"Uh huh," she giggled. "Because I'm sure face lifts trump medical care..."

"You never know," Mark countered as the two stepped off the elevator.

They were immediately met with heaping amounts of chaos, people running all around and seemingly no order whatsoever. Meredith looked to Mark with wide eyes. "Wow," she murmured, looking back to the scene in front of her.

Mark sighed. "Yeah."

Meredith saw Derek wave her over as he pulled on a pair of gloves. She ran to where he was and he handed her her own pair of gloves. "New trauma coming in. Want in?"

"Yeah," she nodded enthusiastically. They both gowned up then met Owen at the entrance to the ER, standing inside the doors to keep from getting soaked from the downpour.

A flash of lightning broke through the sky, bringing with it bright white that lit up the darkness outside. Meredith flinched in surprise, moving closer to Derek. "You okay?" he asked, kissing her temple.

"Yeah. It just scared me," Meredith reassured him.

"Ambulance is pulling up," Owen announced.

Derek peered out the doors. "Do we know what happened?"

Owen shrugged. "Little kid hurt in his backyard. That's all I know," he said.

The ambulance pulled up to the doors of the ER and the paramedics quickly ran around to open the back of the vehicle. Meredith, Derek, and Owen walked over, unable to dodge the golf ball sized raindrops that fell from the sky and splattered all over them. But the rain was quickly forgotten when they saw the young child on the stretcher. No more than five years old with burns over most of his body. The sight almost made Meredith sick to her stomach.

"What the hell happened?" Derek asked as they hurriedly removed him from the ambulance and into the ER doors. They wheeled him into Trauma 3 and began assessing the damage.

"Aaron Decker, age five. His mom found him unconscious next to the trampoline with what appear to be third degree burns to the scalp, shoulder, and leg. Likely that he was jumping on the trampoline at the time when he was repeatedly struck by lightning. He had a seizure en route and what appeared to be a mild heart attack. Pulse was thready but we got it going again after pushing three of epi."

Meredith stared at the little boy clinging to life on the gurney and shook her head. "Who the hell lets their kid jump on a trampoline in a lightning storm?" she asked to no one in particular, the anger flowing through her veins. "And at eight in the morning, no less."

"Where are his parents?" Derek asked, checking Aaron's pupils for activity.

The paramedic shrugged as she handed the chart off to Owen, getting ready to head off back to the ambulance. "His mom was following close behind. She should be here soon."

"Okay," Owen nodded, carefully peeling back the gauze on the through and through wounds to the boy's shoulder.

The paramedics left the trauma room just as Mark was entering. He stopped cold in his tracks when he saw the three others beginning to tend to the Aaron's injuries. "What the hell happened?" he asked, pulling on a pair of gloves.

"Struck by lightning," Derek said. "Third degree burns all over. We're gonna need you in the OR, so don't go too far."

"Okay," Mark agreed. He noticed the burnt flesh on top of the boy's skull and winced. "God damn it," he sighed. "He's lucky the bolt didn't crack his skull wide open."

Derek handed Meredith an IV anesthetic to keep the boy sedated then looked to Mark. "Did it burn the skull?"

"Yeah. Not enough to burn his brain, but there's some damage," Mark told him. "Probably gonna need to do a skin graft to replace the lost skin on his scalp. Where else is he burned?"

Meredith succeeded in inserting Aaron's IV and sighed. "Shoulder and right leg. Seriously, what were his parents thinking?"

She knew that she needed to not think about the boy's crappy parents and focus on keeping the five year old alive, but she couldn't help but sympathize with him. After all, Meredith was practically the poster child for parental neglect.

"Don't worry about them," Derek said calmly. "He's gonna be okay."

"Derek, look at him. He's lucky he's still alive," Meredith countered, her voice irritated.

"Doctors, his mother just arrived. She's in the waiting room," an ER nurse said, peeking her head into the door.

"Meredith, go get any information you can, then meet us back here," Owen requested.

Meredith pulled off her bloodied gloves and nodded. "Okay."

She left the room and the nurse pointed her in the direction of the mother, a blonde woman that bore a striking resemblance to Ellis at that age. Meredith swallowed, reminding herself to keep calm, then walked over to her.

"Mrs. Decker," she said, extending her hand. "I'm Dr. Shepherd. I'm one of the surgeons working on your son. I need you to give me any information you can about what happened."

Meredith led the woman to two available seats, and they each occupied one of them. She set the chart in her lap, waiting for his mother to brief her on what happened to her son.

"Well, I was in the house when it happened. I just found him out there afterward, lying on the ground. When I saw him there, I yelled his name. As I got closer, I noticed how…his body had smoke coming off of it and he wasn't answering," his mother said, choking back a sob. "I didn't even know he was outside."

Meredith nodded slowly. "He seems to have been struck by lightning multiple times. On the way here, the paramedics told us he also suffered a seizure and a small heart attack—which are common after this sort of accident. Right now, he's sedated and we gave him an IV to lessen the pain. It's going to be a while before we can take him into the OR. We need to give Aaron a CT scan to check for brain injury. And x-rays to check for broken bones. He may have internal bleeding as well. We're still assessing him so we don't know for sure, but I just want to prepare you…" she swallowed. "We're going to do everything we can to…" _How does one tell a mother that her son may not live to see the next day?_ It's the one part of the job that she hated.

The boy's mother wiped her eyes and looked to Meredith desperately. "You think he could die?"

"Like I said, right now, he's stable. But his body has been through a significant amount of trauma. His surgery is going to be long and extensive. But his age works in his favor. Children are resilient," Meredith said, trying to sound reassuring.

"I should have been checking on him," she said frantically, running her hands through her hair.

Meredith knew she may be crossing the line, but her curiosity got the best of her. "Where exactly were you?"

Mrs. Decker's demeanor immediately changed, and she focused her eyes on the coffee table between them. "I forgot Aaron had the day off from school, and I had a friend coming over. I guess I got distracted and wasn't listening when he asked if he could go play outside."

"So you were…in the kitchen?" Meredith guessed. _That's usually where people had morning coffee with their friends, right?_

"Actually, no. I was, uh…I was upstairs at the time," she said, trying to sound nonchalant. "I was in my room, which is why I didn't see him outside, or else I would have told him to come in."

Meredith simply nodded. She had gotten all of the information she needed. Neglectful mother "entertaining" a guest in her bedroom while her five year old was keeping himself occupied in a thunderstorm. Just as she was about to excuse herself to go back to the trauma room, Mrs. Decker spoke.

"My husband is out of town. He's always out of town," she said remorsefully. "But Dave, he's there for me. He's my…" she said, trying to search for the right word. _Boyfriend. That was the word_. But Meredith decided not to provide it. They both knew what she meant. "And now my baby could die because I was cheating on my husband."

Mrs. Decker sobbed into her hands and Meredith quickly pulled some tissues from the box on the coffee table and handed them to her. "These things happen," Meredith whispered, reaching for the woman's hand. And she wasn't just saying that. Meredith had lived this life for many, many years. Aaron was just another victim of a broken home.

"I need to get back to your son," she said after a few minutes of sitting with the woman. "I promise you that we're going to do everything in our power to make sure he's okay."

She walked back to the trauma room, her mind racing with emotion. Anger, sympathy, worry. Things like this were part of the job, but when they hit home like this, it was never easy.

"Any info., Grey?" Mark asked as he, Derek, and Owen tried to stabilize the five year old enough so he could be transported for tests.

Meredith slipped on another pair of gloves. "The mother was inside when it happened, so she didn't give me much."

"So the kid was unsupervised…jumping on a trampoline…struck by lightning…and would have been left for dead if she hadn't checked on him?" Mark sighed, putting the information together. "Mom of the year…"

"Yeah well, that's not all," Meredith said, shaking her head.

Derek looked to her curiously. "What do you mean?"

"She was doing more than…not watching him," she explained, helping her husband secure a temporary bandage on Aaron's skull.

"Meaning?" Owen asked.

"Let's just say she was busy in the bedroom at the time," Meredith said plainly.

Mark raised his eyebrows and nodded knowingly. "Aah. Got it."

"Yeah," Derek and Owen echoed in unison.

"Okay, we've done all we can do for now. CT is waiting and we have an OR prepped for when he goes in. If you two wanted to head upstairs, page us when he's ready for surgery," Owen said with a nod. He flipped Aaron's chart closed and handed it to Meredith. "Let's hope for the best."

Meredith took another look at the boy. Burned, intubated, sedated, unconscious. A patient truly clinging to life. "Yeah," she whispered. "Let's hope."

--

Derek and Meredith sat in the CT viewing area, waiting for the images of Aaron's insides to appear on the screen. They were both expecting the worst of course, but part of them wanted to believe that he'd gotten lucky; that he would be in the minority and live to see tomorrow.

"If he lives, what's his prognosis?" Meredith asked quietly. "I mean, will he ever think again? Or walk? Or live a normal life?"

Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I dunno. This sort of thing…I've seen lightning victims before, but never on this level. He may be…deaf, blind, paralyzed. We won't know until we get in there and see how bad it really is. Right now though? He's looking at a long recovery, months of physical therapy, likely PTSD," he said sadly. "Poor kid."

"Yeah," Meredith breathed. "We're not getting a trampoline for our kids…"

He pressed a soothing kiss to Meredith's temple. "There's a chance, Mer. He could live."

"And then he gets to go back to a mother who would rather screw around on his father than take care of him," Meredith said caustically. "That's the best case scenario? It just doesn't seem fair…" she sighed.

"It's not fair," Derek agreed. "But it's better than them having to bury their five year old."

"Yeah, I know," Meredith said.

She was trying her best not to let things get personal. Keeping her emotions in check was important, especially if she wanted to make sure Derek didn't try to talk her out of scrubbing in. He hadn't yet seemed to have figured out that Meredith was thinking of her own childhood, and she was determined to keep it that way for now, for if he knew just how much this case touched her heart, he'd insist that she be assigned to another case—not because he was insensitive, but because he cared.

The images flashed over the monitors and they both leaned in to get a good look at what was going on inside the child's mangled body. Derek pointed to a bleed, which Meredith knew was bad news. "Subdural bleed. Probably caused by the skull fracture. I should be able to fix it as long as it doesn't get much worse," he explained. "Other than that, the brain looks okay."

Meredith clicked on the next set of images, the abdominal and thoracic regions. When everything checked out clean, she looked to Derek confusedly. "No internal bleeding?"

"Doesn't look like it," Derek said, shaking his head. "He got pretty lucky."

"Doctors," an x-ray technician greeted as he opened the sliding door. "I have the kid's x-rays. Broken tibia and fractured fibula," he said.

Derek nodded and took the large envelope from him. "Thank you." He held them up in the light so he and Meredith could get a further look.

Meredith studied them for a moment before she spoke. "Callie should be able to fix his leg pretty easily. He's going to need lots of skin grafts though. Scalp, leg, and shoulder."

"Alright, let's get him out of there," Derek said decisively. "I don't want to wait any longer. OR three is ready for us, so I'll go take him in. I need you to page Callie, Owen, and Mark and have them meet us in there. And call down to the blood bank. Tell them to have lots of Type-O ready for us."

"Okay," Meredith nodded.

She ran to the nurses' station and did what she had to do, and within minutes, the five of them were scrubbing in. The news about the little boy had spread quickly. Everyone was curious to see exactly what a victim of this kind of trauma looked like, so the OR gallery was filled to the hilt with surgeons. But none of the surgeons in the OR seemed to notice their presence.

After giving Aaron another round of medicine through his IV, the anesthesiologist gave the nod for them to begin. Derek took his place at the front of the table, eager to repair the brain bleed. Callie began working on the leg injury, and Meredith assisted Mark and Owen in taking skin from the boy's thighs for the skin grafts. The five year old's heartbeat remained steady, even if it wasn't as strong as they would have liked. He was alive. That was all they could hope for with this level of traumatic injury.

"Kid's a fighter," Owen commented as he checked the heart monitor.

"This leg is a mess, but after a few months of PT, he should have full use of it," Callie said, chipping away the splintered pieces of bone. "I'm gonna need titanium to replace some of this bone," she told one of the nurses so they could page someone to retrieve the pieces from orthopedics.

Mark handed a piece of newly recovered flesh to Meredith. "Kind of ironic. Kid gets struck by lightning and has metal replacing bone. He's going to be afraid of rain for the rest of his life."

"Let's just hope his mother thinks twice before not taking care of her son," Meredith said, the sarcastic undertones dripping from her voice.

"Five year olds rarely listen anyway. Even if she locked him in the house, he still could have found a way outside," Derek pointed out as he operated.

Meredith shrugged. "Point is, you have a five year old, you keep an eye on him. That's what parents are supposed to do."

"She's got a point," Mark said in her defense.

"Where was the mother exactly?" Callie asked curiously.

"Having sex," Meredith informed her. "With her boyfriend."

Callie let out a breath and shook her head. "And now her son could die because of it."

"Social services was talking to her. Apparently, this happened before," Owen told them.

"He was struck by lightning before? This kid should play the lottery with those odds," Mark said.

"Nah, he fell out of his tree house and broke his foot. Mom was AWOL then, too," Owen said, working on Aaron's shoulder.

Meredith frowned beneath her surgical mask. Bad luck seemed to follow the little boy wherever he went. "Poor little kid."

"Asystolic. He's crashing," one of the scrub nurses yelled out.

Owen looked to the rest of the group. "Hands off. Starting manual compressions. Get the crash cart," he said loudly to be heard over the growing chaos of the operating room.

"Damn it," Meredith whispered. Her eyes filled with a thin layer of tears and she looked to Derek. She needed some sort of reassurance that the child would be okay. Derek's eyes met hers instantly. There wasn't much he could do or say to make things better, no matter how much he wanted to.

"His heart can't take the strain. We need to do damage control if he's going to make it. Let his heart regain some strength before we go back in," Owen decided. Mark, Callie, Meredith, and Derek nodded in agreement. Damage control was rare, especially with young children, but it was the safest option.

"Get the plastic," Mark instructed a nurse.

With the help of the scrub nurses, they all managed to cover the boy's body so he could be transported to the ICU. After wrapping a thick layer of protective gauze around Aaron's open brain, they wheeled him to an empty room where he could recuperate enough until they could finish the surgery.

"I'm gonna go talk to his mom with Hunt. I'll meet you in the cafeteria, okay?" Derek said, giving her hand a gentle squeeze as they stood in the hallway.

Meredith nodded and squeezed back. "Yeah, okay."

--

"I got you a turkey sandwich. The salad looked wilted," Meredith said when Derek sat down in the chair across from her in the cafeteria.

"Thank you," Derek smiled. The first smile she'd seen on his face all day. He twisted the cap off of his water bottle and took a sip. "Aaron's mom is pretty upset."

Meredith took a bite of her cheeseburger and the grumbling in her stomach finally dissipated. "Well, maybe this'll teach her a lesson on how to be a responsible parent--I mean, I feel terrible for Aaron, but what did his mother expect?"

"Just because she wasn't watching him doesn't mean she wanted him to get struck by lightning," Derek countered.

Meredith shook her head, running a frustrated hand through her hair. "That's not the point, Derek."

"Mer--"

"You don't get it," Meredith interrupted. "His childhood? That was _my_ childhood. Granted I was never struck by lightning in a thunder storm, but I could have been, and no one would have noticed it. No one deserves that, Derek."

Derek reached for her hand across the table and held it in his own. If he had known how much this case would affect her, he would have made sure she wasn't involved in it. The old wounds from her childhood were healing, and something like this just tore the bandaid right off. "Mer, if this is...I would understand if you didn't want to scrub in again. I know this is tough."

She pulled her hand back from his at his words. "I don't need to be taken off the case. I'm fine."

"Fine-fine or Meredith-fine?" Derek asked. There was a distinct line between the two, and he knew it well.

"Derek, stop," Meredith insisted. "It's always hard, no matter what the situation is. But when you throw a neglected kid into the mix, it's ten times harder. That doesn't mean I can't keep my emotions in check."

Derek backed off, not wanting to anger her. Sometimes his best attempts to help went awry. "Okay, okay. Sorry," he apologized.

"If you want me off the case, just say so," she said resolutely.

"I never said I wanted you off of it. I said that if you wanted off, I would understand," Derek said in his defense. "Look, I'm not trying to start anything. And I know we're at work, but that doesn't change the fact that I care about you."

"I know," Meredith whispered. "But that doesn't mean that cases like this won't get to me."

Derek smiled at her sympathetically. "I know."

"I'm surprised you're not more upset about this," Meredith said before taking a sip of her iced tea.

"Of course I'm upset," Derek argued. "What if he were our son? I can't even imagine what his mother is going through--the guilt she has to live with for the rest of her life, knowing that she could've prevented this from happening. No parent deserves that."

While she agreed with what he was saying, Meredith still found it hard to sympathize with the mother. The guilt was nothing compared to the life threatening injuries that her son had suffered. "And no kid deserves something like this either," she said, standing up from her chair. "Look, I need to pee, then I'm going to head back upstairs to sit with him. I'll see you later, okay?"

Derek nodded slowly and gave her a small smile. "Okay. Love you."

"Love you, too."

Though Meredith was doing her best to keep on her brave face, he could tell that no matter how much she fought against it, this case bothered her in a big way. And Derek found himself caught in the middle of it.


	58. Forgiveness

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no. It's not mine.**

**Just a reminder - this chapter picks up where the last one left off.**

The monitors beeped in a continuous pattern, one after the other. A sign that that Aaron's heart was still beating. He was alive. Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He hadn't spoken to Meredith since lunch time, and he was fairly certain that she was upset. He considered paging her to an on-call room so they could talk things over while they had a few minutes of free time, but then a nurse paged him to Aaron's room, which meant talking to her would have to wait.

Mark appeared in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. "How's he doing?"

"Okay for now. He's more stable now than he was before but...still not great," Derek said tiredly, wiping his eyes with the backs of his wrists.

"It's a shame, you know," Mark began. He took a seat next to Derek and leaned back, ankles crossed comfortably. "Growing up like that. Wasn't fun for me either. Of course, I was never struck by lightning, so I guess I got lucky..." When Mark glanced over at Derek, he noticed the forlorn expression on his face and frowned. "What's wrong with you?"

Normally Mark wasn't the one Derek went to for advice of any kind, but he realized that his best friend might have more insight on Meredith's perspective than he himself did. "Mer--she's upset over the case. I know it's...hard on her. You know what kind of childhood she had. I told her that I'd understand if she wanted off the case, but then she got defensive, told me she was fine. I dunno. Maybe I should just keep my mouth shut," he said, managing a slight laugh.

"Of course it's tough on her. Her mother? Kind of a bitch. And it doesn't make it any easier that Grey had to be the one to comfort the kid's mom. I get that," Mark said with a nod.

"I probably shouldn't bring up personal stuff with her at work, but I just...she's my wife. When I know she's upset, I can't just do nothing," Derek stressed.

Mark shrugged. "Well, obviously."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you love that girl more than anything else in the world. Of course you're gonna try and help her," Mark explained, simple and to the point.

"Yeah," he whispered.

"So what're you gonna do?" Mark asked.

Derek looked to the frail five year old in the hospital bed, his internal organs exposed and covered with a layer of plastic. _That_ was tragic. A small fight with his wife was something that could be easily fixed. He turned to Mark. "Can you sit in here with him? I'm gonna go talk to Meredith."

"Yeah," Mark nodded. "Go."

Derek smiled softly, patting Mark's shoulder. "Thanks." He left the room and went to search down his wife. As he walked to the nurses' station to see if they could have her paged, he glanced at the OR board, stopping short when he saw her name written in the resident slot for a gastric perforation that was currently being performed in OR 2 with Bailey. Derek exhaled deeply and leaned against the staircase behind him. _She'd actually taken herself off the case_.

"Damn it," he sighed.

Hunt came up next to him, noticing the stressed look on his face. "What's up?"

Derek let out a small laugh. He didn't want to bore a colleague with his fight with Meredith, so he simply shook his head. "Nothing. Just one of those days," he said. "I think we should get Aaron back into the OR soon. If we wait too long, we're risking him getting cyanotic and his organs dying."

"Okay then, let's go," Owen agreed before noticing Meredith's name on the OR board. "Meredith's not scrubbing in on him?"

"No, she uh...I guess she got herself reassigned," Derek said as the two men walked back to the little boy's room, ready to go in an operate again. If there was one day that they needed a miracle, it was today.

--

"Dr. Shepherd," Meredith greeted as she walked into the OR, fully scrubbed in and ready to operate.

At the sound of his wife's voice, Derek turned his head curiously. "Dr. Shepherd," he returned. "Happy to have you here," he said quietly before handing her the suctioning tool.

"Just needed a gastric perf. to clear my mind," Meredith stated simply. "How's he doing?"

"Okay for now," Derek answered.

As he removed the aneurysm, he tried to get a feel for Meredith's mood. She'd been short with him when she first entered, which could also be chalked up to professionalism, something they strived to keep within the walls of the hospital. When he leaned in a little closer, she didn't pull away. Their shoulders touched and he swore he heard her let out the smallest of sighs, the kind she made when they were usually cuddled in bed. Maybe she wasn't annoyed with him, maybe she was. Instead of asking her though, he moved the conversation elsewhere.

"How was the gastric perf?" he asked.

Meredith made the smallest noise of disgust. "Good up until the intestines starting oozing all over the place. Bailey let me stitch it back together though."

"Really?" Derek asked, looking to her briefly. He really wasn't surprised; Meredith was brilliant and a task like that would of course be a piece of cake for her. Still though, he couldn't hide his pride.

"Yep."

"I'm glad you came back here," Derek confessed, carefully clipping the aneurysm from the boy's brain.

On cue, Meredith gently suctioned around the areas as Derek worked. "Why wouldn't I be here?" she asked.

"I saw your name on the board. I wasn't sure you'd be finished in time," he explained, occasionally looking up to the monitor to make sure Aaron's pressures remained steady.

"I told you I'd be here," Meredith shrugged. "He's my patient too."

"Dr. Shepherd, I've done as much as I can with his leg. It should be fully functional with some PT," Callie said from her spot at the operating table. "If you want, I can go give his mom an update after I scrub out," she offered.

Derek nodded. "Yeah. Thanks, Torres."

"This kid's gonna spend a hell of a long time in recovery," Mark commented while making another attempt at a skin graft for the boy's shoulder. "These grafts alone are going to take months to heal."

"He's alive. That counts for something," Derek pointed out.

"Any word on where the father is?"

Owen sighed and shook his head. "When the mother was talking to Social Services, she said he was away on some sort of business trip--in Wisconsin or something. Apparently, he's flying in tonight, but I don't know for sure."

"Well, let's hope he's a better parent than she is," Mark said bluntly.

"I'm guessing that if he's away enough for the mother to have a boyfriend, he's probably not wining 'Father of the Year' any time soon," Meredith pointed out as she continued to probe and suction the portion of the brain Derek was working on.

"Before this turns into an episode of Dr. Phil, how about we focus on keeping the patient alive," Derek suggested.

Meredith turned to her husband and looked at him dryly. "Are you...seriously?"

"What?"

"You really don't get what's so wrong about this?" she asked accusingly.

"What's wrong is that there's a five year old boy on this table that woke up this morning and didn't think he'd be torn to pieces by lightning bolts. And as his doctors, we need to make sure he survives. We can't think about what his mother did or didn't do. It happened. It happened and we need to fix it," Derek said calmly.

"If it were our child on here, I don't think you'd feel so black and white about it," Meredith countered. It was like lunchtime all over again, taking out frustrations with the case in what was quite possibly the worst setting imaginable, standing over an open brain.

Mark looked up from his skin grafts with wide eyes. "Grey, are you pregnant?"

"Why does everyone always assume I'm pregnant?" she asked, exasperated. "No, I'm not pregnant. Just using a metaphor."

"I was gonna say..." Mark sighed in relief. "As future uncle, I would need to know these things."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You'll be the first to know, no worries," she said sarcastically.

She and Derek could see Mark grin under his surgical mask. "Okay then."

"I'm not trying to start anything," Meredith said casually. "I was just talking. Sorry for expressing my opinion..."

"Mer, I wasn't trying to--" Derek began before Owen interrupted, the one who'd been caught in the crossfire of the conversations going on all around him.

"So how about the Seahawks game last night? Hasselbeck threw some nice passes," Owen said with a smile.

Mark chimed in, seeming to forget about the previous discussion. "Seahawks fan?"

"Yeah. Why, you're not?" Owen asked as he stitched.

"Nah, Giants..."

As the two men chatted away, Derek glanced over to Meredith, trying to read any expressions she held in her face. He was fairly certain she was upset with him, but knew there was a good chance she'd get even more pissed if he brought it up. So instead of adding to the awkwardness, Derek just joined in on the conversation with Mark and Owen, simply as a way to avoid the unusual silence with his wife. Whatever she needed to say, he knew she would wait to say it until later when they were alone.

--

Since scrubbing out, Meredith hadn't talked to Derek at all. She'd told him that she would take Aaron to post-op and would page him if the little boy had any complications. Aaron had pulled through surgery without coding, and to the surprise of all of them, seemed to be doing well. With the proper care, all of the surgeons on his case were fairly certain that he'd pull through and get better.

The remainder of his surgery passed awkwardly; Meredith gave the occasional yes or no answer if Derek asked her a question, but they were otherwise silent. Meredith could tell he was itching to say something, but chose not to. If Owen and Mark weren't around, she knew he would have. The lines between personal and professional were always blurred when a husband and wife happened to be working in the same OR. Anything that needed to be discussed always had to wait until they were alone, which was sometimes not an easy thing to accomplish in a populated hospital.

Meredith checked her watch. When the time staring back at her read 5:51, she sighed in relief. Nine minutes until her shift ended. She walked into the resident lounge to change and found a note in her cubby from Derek.

_Mer-_

_Emergency surgery on Mrs. Wagner. Meet you at home. Love you._

_Love, Derek_

Meredith dropped down onto the bench and kicked off her shoes. It had been a long, exhausting day; there was nothing more she wanted to do than go home. Going home with Derek was what she'd most prefer, but it looked like that wasn't happening tonight. She pulled off her scrubs and changed back into her shirt and jeans. After packing up her bag, she grabbed her umbrella--the one she'd shared with Derek when they came in this morning, then left the lounge.

She checked the OR board, immediately spotting Derek's name. The surgery he was scrubbed in on shouldn't take any more than an hour, two at most. While walking toward the elevator, Meredith passed by Aaron's room. Monitors and machines everywhere, breathing tubes and bandages. And the boy's mother sitting at his bedside, holding his hand. Meredith knew it would be difficult, but she knew she had to seek her peace with the woman. Taking a deep breath, she entered the sliding glass door and gave Aaron's mother a small smile when she turned her head.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Shepherd--Meredith. We met earlier. I'm one of your son's doctors. I...my shift is over, but I just wanted to see how he was doing," Meredith said softly, setting down her bag and umbrella, then taking the available seat next to the woman.

"Oh. He's uh...well, honestly I don't know. Do you, I mean, do you think he looks okay?" Mrs. Decker asked nervously as she held her son's hand.

Meredith nodded encouragingly. "Yeah, he's--his body has been through a lot of trauma, but he looks good."

"I almost let my son die in the backyard today," the woman choked out, sobs suddenly wracking her body.

"Mrs. Decker, I--"

"Lisa," she said politely as she wept.

"Lisa," Meredith said softly. "I can't even imagine how hard this is, but you can't let guilt get the best of you. We all make mistakes. It doesn't mean you don't love your son," Meredith said supportively, handing Mrs. Decker a few tissues. No matter her feelings for Aaron's mother, she couldn't leave her in here crying. Looking at her son in that hospital bed was more punishment than any parent deserved.

The woman remained silent for a few moments, looking at her bruised, broken five year old as he lie sleeping. "I got married at twenty-one," she said quietly, running her finger over her son's unharmed arm. Meredith nodded slowly and waited for her to continue.

"My husband, Pete, he was twenty five. He'd just graduated from law school and he got a great job at a firm, so I said yes. I finished college, and that summer, we got married. Five months later, I got pregnant with Aaron. We were secure enough that I could be a stay-at-home mom, so that's what I did," she explained. "We were happy."

"So what happened?" Meredith asked. It was a reasonable question, she surmised. Usually when people cheat on their husbands, they have a reason for it. Maybe not Ellis Grey, considering Thatcher seemed to be a loving husband and father, but then again, Ellis Grey wasn't exactly the poster child for normalcy.

"When I agreed to marry him, I didn't agree to raising our son practically by myself. I mean, I knew Pete would have to spend a lot of time at work. You know, late nights at the office and trips here and there. But I thought that as Aaron grew up, he'd want to be at home more. But as he got more successful, the more he had to travel and...it went from coming home at three in the morning to trips all over the country for all sorts of things--and I know he only does it because he loves us, but I don't know. I got lonely, I guess," Lisa confessed guiltily.

Meredith listened as the story unfolded. If anything, she was coming to understand how the boy's mother felt. Loneliness was once something Meredith had to deal with on a daily basis. Up until she met the love of her life. Hearing Lisa's story made her thankful that she and Derek would never let their own marriage play out the same way.

"And then I met Dave. And when I was having a bad day, he would come over and we would talk. He was my friend, and one day we just..." she trailed off.

"Fell in love?" Meredith offered.

Lisa looked over to Meredith with red-rimmed eyes and nodded. "Yeah. We did."

"So what happens now?" she asked quietly.

"I don't know." Lisa let out a painful sigh and wiped her eyes with her tissue. "I know you must think I'm a terrible person."

"I don't," Meredith corrected. "Falling in love really isn't one of those things that we have any control over. What happened to your son is terrible, but that doesn't make you a bad person. You're doing the best you can do. And that's all anybody can do..." she said, taking Lisa's hand in her own. Meredith had said the same words to her mother a little over a year ago, and somehow they resonated for Aaron's mother as well.

"I love my son so much," she whispered, gently lifting Aaron's hand and kissing the top of it. "My job is to protect him, and I didn't."

Meredith shook her head. "You couldn't have known. And he's alive. That's...it's a miracle, and those are hard to come by. He's surrounded by world class surgeons and if he stays strong like he is now, he'll walk out of here in a few weeks. And no matter what happens, he's your son, and you two love each other."

"Do you have any children?" Lisa asked with a soft smile.

"Oh um, no actually. One day, but not yet," Meredith said, shaking her head.

"You're going to be a good mother, I can tell," she complimented. "I saw how you cared for my son today and...I'm just grateful for everything you've done for him."

Meredith smiled. "Thank you," she whispered. "I'll come back in the morning to check on you and Aaron. Do you need anything before I go? Some coffee or--?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Thank you though," Lisa said graciously. "And thank you for talking with me. It's...I really appreciate it."

Meredith stood up from her chair and grabbed her belongings off the floor next to her. She patted Lisa's shoulder softly. "You're welcome."

--

It was close to eight o'clock when Derek walked in the front door, bearing with him take-out and a bottle of wine. Meredith muted the TV and pulled her legs up on the couch, wanting nothing more than to make up with him. She leaned over the wrap-around couch to scratch Charlie's head before reaching for the blanket draped over the cushion next to him.

"Hey," Derek greeted softly. He dropped his keys on the table in the foyer, removed his shoes and coat, and set the wine and some plastic bags full of some deliciously smelling food down on the coffee table in front of her.

"What's that?" Meredith asked.

Derek sat down next to his wife on the couch and kissed her cheek. "Italian. Or as I like to call it, my peace offering."

"I'm not mad," she said softly. "I mean, I was annoyed earlier, but I get it. You love me. And you were just trying to look out for me."

"I'm still sorry though. I shouldn't have suggested that you take yourself off his case. You're strong. I've seen you handle tough cases better than I ever could. Aaron is a fighter just like you. I've always loved that about you. And I'm sorry that I made you feel like you weren't strong enough to handle it."

"It's okay," Meredith whispered, taking his hand and lacing their fingers. "You know I talked to Aaron's mom."

Derek set his arm on the top of the couch and took a wavy lock of her hair between his fingers. "You did?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, moving closer to her husband. "She's a mess," she sighed. "But she loves her son."

"She does," Derek agreed.

Meredith let out a breath. "I shouldn't have been so hostile--not to you and especially not in the OR. Crappy childhood memories still get to me, I guess..." she said apologetically.

"And that makes you a better doctor," Derek said definitively. "Because you know what it's like, and you hate to see it happen to anyone else. And it's why you're going to be an amazing mother one day," he said, pride filled tears in his eyes as he kissed her forehead.

She leaned into his body, breathing him in. Meredith splayed her palm over his cheek and felt the familiar stubble on her skin. "Promise me that what happened to Aaron will never happen to any of our kids, because I don't think I could live with myself if it did."

"Our kids are going to be the happiest, most loved kids ever," Derek whispered into her hair. "Because they'll be ours."

Meredith kissed him then, the first kiss they'd shared since waking up fifteen hours ago. The feeling of his lips on hers made Meredith moan into his mouth and Derek easily pulled his wife into his lap. He wrapped his arms around her back, hugging her close. When their lips pulled apart, she ran her fingers through his hair, eventually settling to play with the curls at the nape of his neck. "I love you, Derek," she said softly.

"I love you too, so much," Derek echoed, giving her a gentle squeeze and resting his chin on her shoulder. "You hungry?"

"Yeah," she said, shimmying off his lap and onto the cushion next to him.

"Good, because I bought a lot," he laughed as he took the take-out containers from the bag and set them on the table.

Meredith smiled. "What'd you get?"

"Chicken parm, manicotti, salad, breadsticks..." Derek shrugged.

"Uh huh," she giggled. "Trying to make up with me by using food?" Meredith called teasingly as Derek walked into the kitchen for utensils and wine glasses.

He came back into the living room and smiled at her. "Well now that I know you're not mad at me, I can admit it," he joked.

"Using food always works, just for future reference."

"So does this mean we're having make-up sex tonight, too?" Derek smirked.

Meredith pressed a kiss to Derek's cheek. "Well, obviously."


	59. Brunch with the Greys

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**I really hope people are still enjoying this fic. The lack of feedback lately has me a little discouraged. Thanks to all of you that do review - you know who you are; it means so much to me. **

Meredith woke up with a knot in her stomach. Normally, a brunch wasn't something to be nervous about, but a brunch spent with an estranged father that she hadn't seen for months filled her with all sorts of butterflies that she'd rather not experience. Lexie called Meredith a few days ago, asking if she and Derek would like to join her, Molly, Eric, Laura, and Thatcher for a Christmas brunch. Apparently, Susan always used to host a get together a week or two before Christmas, and the girls thought it would be nice to keep tradition in their mother's memory. And because Meredith and Derek were family, of course they were invited along.

Meredith had her reservations at first. Seeing her father was always an awkward ordeal; she never knew what to say or how to act. Even ten minutes spent in the same room and she was itching to be somewhere else. But after talking to Derek, she realized that maybe it would be okay. A chance to see Molly, Laura, and Eric would be nice, and Derek would be next to her the whole time, so if things got too uncomfortable with her father, he could cleverly find a way to get them out of it. He was good at things like that.

But as she turned off the alarm, remembering why she'd set it today in the first place, she couldn't help but regret letting her charming husband talk her into such a stupid thing. "I don't want to get up," she murmured into her pillow.

Derek wrapped his arms around her and kissed the back of her head. "We have to be at your sister's house by eleven. It's already nine," he said sleepily.

"Brunches are stupid."

"Mer," Derek chuckled tiredly. "It's going to be okay."

"Says the Shepherd who married a Grey..." Meredith said sarcastically. "A Shepherd brunch would be all hugs and cobbler and perfection. My side of the family? A bloodbath that ends in tears."

Derek laughed out loud, potentially risking his own safety, but he couldn't help it. Meredith liked to throw in the dramatics for effect. "I promise your mother's ghost isn't going to come back and battle it out with your father," he joked. "It's just brunch. It'll all be over in an hour or two."

Meredith rolled over into his arms, nuzzling her face into his neck. "Hmm...you promise?"

"I promise," Derek whispered, kissing the crown of his wife's head. "Seeing Laura will be fun. She's almost two now."

"She is really cute..." Meredith confessed.

"She is," Derek agreed with a smile. When Meredith made no attempt to get out of bed, he knew what would cheer her up. It cheered her up every other day, and somehow he knew today, she needed the fun distraction. "Wanna have sex? That always makes you feel better," he suggested.

Meredith raised her head just a little. A small smile appeared on her lips as she looked at him. "Yeah?"

"You know I'm always up for having sex," Derek teased, running her fingers through her hair.

"Me too," she whispered as she rolled onto her back and pulled her husband on top of her. Morning sex was definitely necessary today.

--

They pulled up in front of 3321 Hadley Street promptly at eleven o'clock. Meredith had only been there once before; it seemed like decades ago when it fact it had only been a little over a year and a half. That, too, had been a less than pleasant memory...

"Nice house," Derek complimented as they unbuckled their seatbelts.

Meredith nodded distractedly. "Yeah, it's nice."

He noticed the look of complete dread in her eyes and frowned. "Mer," he said softly, taking hold of her hand. "If you really don't want to do this, we don't have to."

"No, it's...it's good. It'll be fine," she said unconvincingly but still managing a small smile. When she saw her husband's worried face, she rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on. Where's my rousing _'it's just brunch'_ speech you gave me in bed?" she asked with a smirk.

"Well, you look like you're going to pee yourself. I'm concerned," he chuckled.

Meredith pretended to be offended. "I do not look like I'm going to pee myself. Come on, let's just do this," she said, opening the car door.

Derek quickly got out of the car and walked around to take her hand. A light snow had fallen the night before, and he didn't want either of them to slip on any icy spots. He kissed her temple when they reached the front door and rang the doorbell. "I love you."

She squeezed his hand and smiled softly at her husband. "I love you too."

Lexie came to the door, bouncing Laura on her hip. "Hey guys" she said happily. "Come in."

"Thank you," Derek grinned.

He and Meredith stepped inside, and they immediately noticed just how cozy the home felt. Pictures of Molly and Lexie lined the walls, no doubt Susan's doing back when the girls were growing up, as well as photos of Laura. Meredith smiled a little; the idea of family wasn't always appealing, but she had to admit, it was nice to have actual relatives that she could grow close with.

"Mehwidif!" Laura squealed, reaching her arms out.

"She remembers you two," Lexie laughed as she passed Laura over to Meredith.

Derek smiled proudly at his wife. She was so comfortable with the little girl, and Laura loved her. "Hi, Laur," he said with a smile. "You look very pretty today."

"Dewek!" Laura giggled, kicking her pantyhose-covered legs excitedly.

"Molly and Eric will be back any second. They're picking my--your--well, our uh...they're picking him up from his house. Molly didn't want him to have to drive in the snow," Lexie explained, rolling her eyes. "She's always been the worrier in the family."

Derek and Meredith followed Lexie into the kitchen. "So where's he living now?" Derek asked conversationally.

"Well, Molly and I thought this house wasn't really a good place for him to live. It's just...a lot of memories, you know, of my mom and...we just figured it would be better for him to start fresh somewhere else. He bought this little twin house a few miles away on Edgewood. So Molly and Eric live here now," Lexie told them. "Would you like some coffee?"

"Sure," Meredith said with a small smile. "Do you need me to help you with anything?" she asked as Laura picked up Meredith's hand to look at her wedding ring.

Lexie shook her head, setting two cups of coffee on the kitchen table. "Nope, I'm good. I'm over here enough watching Laura, so I know my way around," she joked. "Dr. Shepherd, do you want cream and sugar?" she asked.

Derek smiled. "Yeah, thanks. And you don't have to call me Dr. Shepherd. You're my sister-in-law," he chuckled. "Derek works fine."

"Oh, thanks," Lexie laughed, blushing a little. "Sorry if this is awkward. It really shouldn't be. I mean, we work together every day..."

"It's not," Meredith assured her. "This is good. Families do stuff like this. Derek's family does stuff like this, so I know he feels right at home," she teased.

Lexie handed her niece her sippy cup and smiled. "Do you come from a big family, Derek?"

"Four sisters. Fifteen nieces and nephews between them..." he said amusedly. "And I'm the black sheep who hasn't given my mother any grandkids yet."

Lexie laughed. "I think everybody is waiting for that day. Last week, I heard Izzie talking to Alex about your bridesmaid dress, Meredith. Apparently, she's not going to fit you for it until September, just in case you surprise us all with a baby bump. Her exact words..."

Meredith shook her head and giggled. "I swear, she's already knitting baby clothes."

"Baby?" Laura asked, turning her head up toward Meredith with wide eyes.

"No, no baby yet," Meredith said humorously.

The front door opened and Meredith swallowed hard. She knew it really was no big deal, seeing her father, but it was only natural given their history. Laura smiled wide when she saw her mom, dad, and grandpa enter the kitchen. "Hi Ma!" she giggled, waving her hand.

"Hey sweetie," Molly laughed. "Hi Meredith, hi Derek. It's so nice to see you guys again," she said kindly.

"Hey guys," Eric greeted them. "Hey beautiful," he laughed, ruffling the soft blonde curls on top of his daughter's head.

"Hi Meredith, Derek," Thatcher nodded politely, shaking each of their hands.

Derek decided to step in, in case words were lost on Meredith at the moment. He knew it was probably a lot to handle, and he wanted to help out. "Hi, how are you doing?" he asked kindly. After they both shook his hand, Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's shoulders. Somehow he knew she'd appreciate it now.

"Good, thanks. Just uh, keeping busy. How are you two doing? It's been a while," Thatcher said.

"Yeah, it has," Meredith agreed. "We've been doing well. Work is, well, it's always busy. I'm sure Lexie tells you all about that," she managed to giggle awkwardly.

Her father laughed, taking a sip of the coffee Molly had poured for him. "She does. I think they work you too hard over there. All of those late nights and long hours. I don't know how you do it..." he said, undoubtedly thinking back to the days when Ellis spent more time at the hospital than with her family. That's one of the few things he and Meredith had in common. Memories of just the two of them, living a life that came second to Ellis Grey's work.

"Yeah, it's tough," Derek nodded. "We love it though. But days off are nice too," he joked.

Laura decided that she would like some attention, so she turned toward her grandpa from her place in Meredith's lap. "Baby in Mewedif," she informed him, pointing to her aunt's stomach.

"Oh! Oh my...Meredith, are you?" Thatcher stammered.

Meredith quickly shook her head. "No no, I'm not," she said. "Before you got here, we were talking about something a friend of ours said at work. I guess Laura spun the story a little..."

Molly set out a plate of pastries on the table and poked Laura's belly with her finger. "Always causing trouble," she laughed.

"One day though," Meredith added.

"Good," Thatcher beamed, seeming proud if his first born daughter. "You know, you used to carry your dolls around with you everywhere we went...like a little mother," he said nostalgically. "No matter where we went, you always had this one doll. What was her name? Something with an 'L'...Lilly, I think."

Meredith didn't know what to say. The fact that her father remembered the small detail of her doll's name after so many years may have seemed like a coincidence to anyone else, but it meant something to her, like he cared. Like he really did love her.

"You remember that?" she asked softly. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Molly and Lexie smiling, too. It was almost like the two had been rooting for Meredith and Thatcher to mend some fences today. She had to give them credit; they could have just as easily been cold to her, but since finding out about Meredith, they'd welcomed her into their family freely, like she belonged.

"Of course," he chuckled. "I bought her for you when you were, oh I don't know, two years old or so."

"Have any pictures of that?" Derek asked teasingly, resulting in a playful elbow nudge from his wife.

"There's tons of pictures. Of all three of you girls. Susan...she uh, she framed the one of you and me, Meredith, on the sled at the middle school, remember? I took it with me when I moved," her father said with a smile as he handed Laura a cookie.

Meredith swallowed a bite of her scone. "You did?"

"I left most of the pictures in albums for you to show your kids one day, but I saved a few," he said.

"I've seen those pictures," Molly chimed in. "None of us can get over how much Laura looks like you at her age. She looks more like you than Eric or me," she said amusedly.

"I guess the Grey gene is dominant. Sorry to say, Derek..." Lexie giggled before refilling her cup of coffee.

Derek grinned at Meredith. "That's okay. Grey's make cute babies, if Laura is any indication," he chuckled as the nearly two old girl licked some pink icing off her hand then gave Derek a smile.

Meredith relaxed in her chair. For the first time in a long time, she actually felt comfortable with her father and her family. She owed a lot of that to Derek, who could always be counted on to strike up a chatty, pleasant conversation with anyone. Meredith really appreciated that about him. No matter what, he was always there for her.

The rest of the brunch was surprisingly enjoyable. There was small talk and laughter, and as Derek promised, only lasted a little under two hours. Meredith even hugged her father before she and Derek left, and it wasn't nearly as awkward as she thought it would be. All in all, it was a success. Laura was still adorable, and Molly, Eric, and Lexie were loving and friendly. When Thatcher asked to have them over for coffee sometime, Meredith agreed. Mending fences worked both ways, so the least she could do was try to have a relationship with her father, even if they were never the closest of relatives.

As Derek drove back home, he reached over and took Meredith's hand. "See? We lived," he chuckled.

"Yes, we lived," Meredith sighed. She gently squeezed his hand. "Thank you."

"For what?" he asked confusedly.

Meredith shrugged, looking out the window at the white snow that blanketed everything around them. Seattle was beautiful this time of year; it was rare that snow fell, but when it did, it was always so picturesque and peaceful looking. "Coming with me today, being nice to my dad...I know how you feel about him."

"I don't hate your father," Derek said reassuringly. "I think he made some...bad decisions in his life, but I don't think he's a bad person. And he's trying to make things better. And I'm grateful to him for that, for your sake. You deserve a family, Meredith."

"I'm just glad I didn't feel the urge to gauge my eyes out with a spoon," she said, turning the heat up a notch in the car.

Derek laughed. "It was actually a nice morning. They're good people," he said sincerely. "It'll be nice to have family close by for when we have kids."

"Yeah," Meredith agreed softly. She hadn't thought about that aspect before, but he was right. Having aunts, uncles, and cousins on her side of the family was something their children deserved too. "And maybe my dad...I mean, I think he'd want to know our kids too. He's so good with Laura and--"

"I think that would be nice, too," Derek concurred, kissing the top of her hand as he drove down the dirt road toward their home.

Meredith smiled at her husband. If it weren't forty degrees outside, she'd be willing to give him car sex for how supportive and charming he was being today. After they got out of the car, Derek looked over at her and grinned widely. "You know what we haven't done yet?"

"Hmm?" she asked, eyeing him strangely.

"Gotten ourselves a Christmas tree," he pointed out, taking her rosy cheeks between his gloved hands and kissing her softly.

"Crap," Meredith blurted out against his lips.

Derek chuckled amusedly. "We've been busy with work. This is our first day off in two weeks; it's okay. We can get one today."

"But we just drove all the way back here," Meredith said as they walked toward the front door of the house.

"Mer, we own like forty acres of land. We have trees," he said with a smile. "We can go cut one down ourselves."

Meredith knelt down and pet Charlie, who greeted them when they got inside. "There's Christmas trees out here?"

"You mean fir? Yeah, I think there's a couple hundred actually," Derek chuckled. "We can take Charlie out there, cut one down ourselves; it'll be fun."

She smiled a little and kissed him. "You're the guy who wears the reindeer sweater on Christmas, aren't you?" she giggled.

"I'll buy us matching ones," he murmured, his lips still pressed to hers.

"You do that..." Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Alright fine, we can go. But let's go before it gets much colder outside. And Charlie needs his sweater."

Derek's forehead wrinkled and he looked at her suspiciously. "Since when does he have a sweater?"

"Since Izzie knitted one for him one afternoon," Meredith said, reaching into the coat closet for the navy blue sweater. "Come here, buddy."

"She knits dog sweaters now?" Derek asked with a laugh.

Meredith finished putting the small sweater on their dog then hooked his leash onto his collar. "You think that's bad? She's knitting blankets."

"For who?"

"For us," she said simply. "Or more specifically, our yet to be conceived child."

"Uh huh," he said incredulously.

Meredith giggled as they walked back out the front door and Derek locked it behind them. "I wouldn't be surprised if she's already planning a baby shower.'"

"Probably is," Derek chuckled. After retrieving a saw from their garage, he took her free hand as the two set out on the land to pick out a tree. If he recalled correctly, it wasn't more than a ten minute walk out to where there was a collection of fir trees. Finding one they both liked could be a little difficult, but Derek already knew Meredith would have the final say. That's how it usually went, and he didn't mind at all.

"Oh, this one," Meredith gasped after the short walk to the fir trees that populated their land. She walked around a large one, examining it for imperfections, but came across none. Charlie sniffed at the pine needles, then looked up at Meredith and barked. "And Charlie clearly agrees with me."

Derek looked the tree over for a minute, calculating the logistics of cutting it down, carrying it home, fitting it through the door, and making sure it didn't hit the ceiling of their house. From what he could tell, it seemed like a good tree. Not too tall, not too short, not too fat or thin. His wife knew how to pick a Christmas tree. "I love it," he grinned in agreement.

"Yeah?" she asked, her nose and cheeks red from the cold wind.

"Looks like the one to me," Derek said before kissing her.

"Need help cutting it down?"

"Yeah, just reach in for the trunk and hold it still," he instructed, kneeling down to see where he should begin sawing.

Meredith did just that and nodded. "Okay, I got it."

It took Derek a few minutes to chop it down, and when he finally did, Meredith smiled at her husband. "I'll help you carry it back."

"It's okay; I've got it," he assured her.

"Derek, it's a big tree. Seriously, let me help you," Meredith insisted. She unhooked Charlie from his leash and put it in her pocket. He always stayed close by, and they knew he wouldn't run off, so she didn't mind letting him walk a little ahead of them. She hoisted the top half of the tree between her arm and her side while Derek supported the weight of the bottom half, and after a bit of teamwork, they managed to make it home fairly quickly.

They set the tree up in an empty space in the living room, next to the window. Meredith couldn't help but smile at how perfect it looked sitting in their home. There was something so cozy and familiar about a Christmas tree, something she hadn't appreciated when she lived back at the old house. Sure, Izzie always did a nice job decorating the house, and making it homey, but without Derek there to celebrate with, the holiday wasn't one she really enjoyed. Now though, knowing that every holiday from here on in would be spent in the presence of her husband and their would-be children, she was actually, truly happy.

"I love it," she whispered, her arms wrapped around him as she rested her head on his chest.

Derek tilted her chin up and kissed her, softly and sweetly, before smiling. "We need to decorate it."

Meredith quickly frowned. Neither of them hadn't brought any Christmas tree decorations into the marriage; no ornaments or lights, for neither were too big on holidays in the past year or two. "Oh!" she gasped, remembering that Izzie had thought ahead, clearly aware of that fact, and had given them an array of decorations as part of her wedding present. Meredith had to give her props; Izzie was quite the homemaker.

"What?" Derek asked curiously.

"Izzie," she said, pulling back from their embrace. "She gave us a bunch of stuff, remember? Where did we put it?"

Derek furrowed his brow. "Huh?" he asked, still confused.

"For the wedding. Her gift. Remember, the big frilly box with Christmas stuff in it. I think we put it in the basement back when we were moving in."

"Oh, yeah," Derek finally recalled. "I remember that," he nodded.

"Yeah."

Meredith walked in front of him down the basement stairs, and after a little searching, they found the box amongst an assortment of others, full of shiny new lights and Christmas balls Izzie had purchased. Derek carried it up the steps and set it down on the living room floor after they returned. When he opened it, both of them smiled. It was an unconventional wedding gift, but Izzie knew them well, and she obviously knew that neither of them would have thought to buy such a thing until the last minute, so she saved them the trouble.

"Remind me to thank her for this," Meredith giggled.

"We'll buy her a really nice Christmas gift," Derek agreed humorously. He pulled a few glass Christmas balls from the box and smiled. Red and green, blue and gold, ones with candy canes, snowmen, snowflakes. Appropriately Izzie, but also incredibly sweet.

"These are cute," she said sincerely, examining one in her hand.

Derek grinned. "One day, we'll have the kids' ornaments all over the tree...popsicle stick angels and clothespin reindeer. All of that fun preschool stuff that we put up every year, even when they're old enough to beg us not to," he laughed.

"Does your mom still have all of that stuff?" Meredith asked as they opened the packs of lights to string around the tree.

"Yeah," Derek said, rolling his eyes amusedly. "She does. She even has Mark's stuff. He always gave her the art projects we made at school. My mom...appreciated it more than his did."

"We're keeping all of that stuff too. No matter how bad it is...like macaroni glued to construction paper. I want us to have all of it," Meredith said softly, gently squeezing his hand.

He leaned in and kissed her, smiling against her lips. "We will. Homemade ornaments and gingerbread houses. Even if it's tacky," he chuckled. "It's important for kids to have memories like that."

Meredith took his hand, helping to lift him up off the floor so they could begin wrapping the lights around the tree. "Some memories, I don't want them knowing about..." she said coyly as she began weaving a string of lights through the thick green branches.

Derek smirked, accepting the lights when her arms couldn't reach any further. "Meaning?"

"Well, when we have sex under it, I don't think they'll want to know," she giggled.

"Hmm...good point," Derek agreed, laughing. "So I guess that means we should have sex under it tonight, too?"

"Maybe," Meredith said teasingly, although she knew there was close to a hundred percent guarantee of such a thing happening. Naked Derek under the Christmas tree was much too tempting to pass up.

He just smirked at her. "Uh huh...I'll take that as a yes."

"Decorating first, sex later," she said definitively, pulling another string of lights from the box. "The faster we do this, the faster you can undress me under it."

"I'll take the lights, you can starting putting the ornaments on," Derek said, no doubt trying to speed up the process. Sex was always a great incentive to get things done.

And get things done, they did. Within the hour, the entire tree was glowing with reds, greens, yellows, and blues. The ornaments hung daintily from the branches, the light reflecting off of them and casting a warm glow over the entire living room. It wasn't overdone in a way that made it look tacky, but had just the perfect amount of decoration that even Izzie would be proud.

"I love it," Derek said softly, wrapping his arms around her waist before kissing her.

Meredith smiled as she kissed him back, relishing in the warmth of his body pressed to hers. "Me too."

"Our first Christmas together," he grinned.

"This might be our only Christmas where it's just the two of us--and Charlie, obviously," she whispered, resting her head on his chest. "There could be a baby on the way next Christmas."

Derek hugged her tighter; whenever Meredith said things like that, his heart went wild. Just the image of his wife carrying their child was enough to bring tears to his eyes. "Hmm..." he hummed. "I hope so."

She raised her head and smiled at him. "Me too."

"You know how to ensure that there's a baby on the way next Christmas?" he asked, kissing her forehead.

"How?" she asked with a smirk, sensing what he was going to say next.

"Lots of practicing," he said, his blue eyes sparking even more than usual thanks to the lights on their tree.

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair, settling her hands on the back of his neck. "Like under the Christmas tree?" she giggled.

"New traditions have to start sometime," Derek pointed out amusedly.

She laughed, pulling her shirt over her head before gently pushing him toward the carpeted floor under the tree. "Excellent point."

--

**Again, let me know if this fic is getting old. I'm not saying this for pity, I'm just wondering if I should wrap things up sooner than I originally planned out. Anyway, let me know. :)**


	60. Christmas

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, George would be alive. Last night, I went through half a box of tissues from crying.**

**Thanks for all of your feedback. As long as people are interested, I'll continue with this fic. **

Christmas morning brought with it bright sunshine that shone in through the windows of the house. Despite the cold air outside, inside their home was cozy, warm and comforting. As Derek made Meredith's morning coffee, he smiled, for he knew that his wife probably hadn't had a truly happy Christmas since she was a child. But he knew that all of that was going to change now that they were married. Every holiday would be a good one, full of memories. And it thrilled him that they would be making those memories together.

"Merry Christmas," Derek whispered, walking into their bedroom in his boxers and tee shirt, Meredith's morning coffee in his hand.

Meredith sleepily rolled onto her back and smiled. "Hey," she yawned, but still making no attempt to sit up. She eyed him curiously and smirked. "Reindeer boxers?"

"It's Christmas," he said simply before crawling back into bed with her, setting her coffee down on her nightstand. When Meredith continued to stare at him, waiting for further explanation of his boxers, he laughed. "My nieces got them for me."

"You look cute," she giggled, rolling into his arms. She nuzzled her face into his chest and he wrapped himself around her, running his fingers up and down her back. "Merry Christmas, Der," Meredith said softly.

"Hmm...I love you," he breathed, taking in the soft scent of her hair. "I love you so much."

Meredith pressed her palm against his cheek and kissed him. "I love you too."

"We have presents under the tree..." Derek reminded her in an attempt to get her out of bed. Of course, doing so on a valued day off was easier said than done.

"Will they be there in an hour?" she asked.

Derek raised his eyebrows in question. "Yeah, why?"

She smirked. "Because," Meredith said coyly, wrapping her legs around his waist. "It's a holiday. Do I need to remind you what our holiday tradition is?"

He swiftly rolled Meredith on top of him and snaked his fingers up the back of her long sleeved shirt. "No, I think I remember," Derek chuckled.

"Good," she whispered, running her fingers over the front of his reindeer boxers. "Because apparently Christmas makes me horny."

"That...sounds wrong," Derek laughed before pulling her shirt over her head.

"Blame the boxers," Meredith giggled, gasping when Derek's fingers worked their way into her panties.

Not even out of bed yet, and Meredith already knew, Christmas was going to be fun.

--

They'd made an agreement not to buy each other too much for the holiday. They had everything they needed, so they decided to just splurge a little on various odds and ends the other would enjoy. It was easy because they knew each other like the backs of their hands: he knew what she would like, she knew what he would like. And of course, Charlie was included too.

"This is for you," Derek grinned, pulling a pink bag from the growing pile of wrapping paper.

When Meredith saw that the bag came from Victoria's Secret, she smirked. "Derek..."

"What?" he chuckled.

She leaned over and kissed him quickly. "Porny," she giggled.

"I haven't bought you any lingerie since your birthday five months ago. I figured you could use some," he said playfully, waiting for her to open the shiny pink bag.

"Hmm..." Meredith smiled coyly, slowly removing the pink tissue paper before pulling out a lacy, red nightie. "Derek!"

He laughed and wrapped his arm around her waist as the two sat in their pajamas on the carpeted living room floor. "What? You're gonna look hot in this..."

"For your eyes only," she giggled again. "My boobs are going to be spilling over the top," she pointed out as she examined the nightie.

"One of the reasons I chose that one," Derek explained, a naughty glint shining through in his eyes. "There's more in there, you know."

Meredith leaned into her husband as she searched for more articles in the bag. Surely, whatever else he'd purchased would be just as scantily clad, not that she minded. She always had fun in it, and Derek always had just as much fun taking it off of her. She pulled out the last of the tissue paper and found three sets of matching bras and panties, a black, a pink, and a navy.

"You really went to Victoria's Secret and picked out all of this for me?" Meredith asked gratefully. As far as husbands went, she knew she had gotten lucky. Derek didn't mind buying her tampons and was more than willing to take a day off to take care of her when she was sick, and even bought lingerie for her. She _really_ loved him. "And you got my bra size right," she said proudly.

Derek kissed her temple. "We're married; I do your laundry. Of course I know it," he chuckled. "Do you like what I picked out? If not, you can exchange--"

"I love it," Meredith whispered, pressing her lips over his. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

After they broke the kiss, she pointed to a large box covered in gingerbread man wrapping paper. "That's for you. Well, for both of us, but more for you," Meredith rambled as Derek slid the the package in front of them.

"Okay..." he said curiously. Derek peeled off the gift wrap then opened the box. Inside, there was a plethora of fishing equipment, ranging from hooks to vests. He grinned widely, looking over to Meredith. "You really bought me new fishing stuff?"

"Well, I know you've been meaning to buy it, but still haven't, so I decided I would. There's stuff for both of us in there," she said as she awaited his reaction. Derek had been trying to get her to go fishing with him practically since they met, but Meredith always declined. There was something about dead fish that made her squeamish, despite the blood and organs she dealt with on a daily basis at work.

"In other words, you'll actually go fishing with me?" he asked, his smile reaching his eyes.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I figured it could be fun. We could go fishing out on the dock, maybe have a picnic--and by picnic, I mean sex, too--then we could have a cookout or something. As long as I don't have to touch slimy, dead things, I'll be fine," she giggled.

Derek wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly. It was Meredith's little tokens of affection that made him grateful every day that he got to spend the rest of his life with her. "Thank you."

"So you like it?"

"I love it. And it _will_ be fun," he laughed. "We can go when it gets warm outside."

"Okay," she whispered, cupping his cheeks to kiss him again.

He smiled against her lips. "Thank you for all of my gifts. You did good, Mer," he chuckled, running his fingers through her hair.

"Hmm, so did you," Meredith giggled. "But...there's one more."

"What?"

Meredith used his shoulder for support then hopped up to her feet. She walked over to the mantle, grabbing an envelope resting atop it. When she sat back down next to him, she handed it to Derek and smiled. "Here."

"What's this?" he asked suspiciously, flipping the white envelope over in his hands.

"You have to open it," she said, rolling her eyes playfully.

Derek tore open the top of the envelope with his thumb, careful not to rip whatever was inside. He could see Meredith's smile growing wider from the corner of his eye when he pulled out the contents. Two airline tickets to Bermuda. Derek turned his head to Meredith, stunned in surprise. "We're going to Bermuda?"

"Mmhmm," Meredith grinned; her heart fluttered at the sight of him, so obviously taken aback and happy. "It's in August. That's the closest I could book it. At first, I was thinking of taking it over our anniversary in July, but I know that we're, um, going to start trying that night...for a baby, and I thought we might want to be here for that because that's...I just think it would be more special to be in our own bed," she rambled, blushing when she noticed Derek smiling amusedly at her. "And I already cleared it with the Chief, so don't worry about any of that. I'm going to be working my ass off to build up vacation time, but...yeah, we're going to Bermuda," she finished.

"You're the coolest wife ever, you know that?" Derek laughed, pulling her onto his lap to hug her again. He could never get enough of her, no matter how close to him she was.

"So you really want to go?" she asked quietly, worrying her fingers in his hair.

Derek answered her by kissing her, soft and slow. They'd talked about going away, but hadn't gotten the time to sit down and plan a vacation for themselves. For Meredith to pull something like this together while simultaneously being a surgeon and keeping her plans from him couldn't have been an easy feat. Sometimes he wondered what he'd done right to deserve to have such a person in his life.

"I can't wait to go," he answered before kissing her again. "Thank you," Derek whispered genuinely.

"I wanted to do something nice for you. You're just...such a good person. And husband. And I just wanted you to know how much I appreciate that," Meredith said softly, resting her forehead against his. "I love you so much."

"I love _you_," he echoed. "I fall more in love with you everyday."

Meredith smiled. "I can wear my new lingerie there..." she said coyly. "And you can take it off me before you ravish me."

"Now I'm really glad I bought it," Derek laughed.

"I would say that I would try it on for you now, but I'm hungry," she teased, laughing as she got up off his lap. "Breakfast?"

"Are you gonna help me cook?"

Meredith helped him off the floor and bit her lip adorably. "I always help you cook. I made toast last time."

"Ah, right. I forgot. You're becoming quite the chef," he mocked playfully, kissing her temple as they walked into the kitchen, Charlie following close behind with his new hot dog toy in his mouth.

Meredith giggled. "Damn right."

--

The fireplace flickered with low flame, sending warmth throughout the living room. The sun had gone down, a reminder of the later time of day. They'd eaten breakfast, which was followed up with some bendy sex in the shower. After lunch, they decided to use the gingerbread cookie mix Izzie had given them as part of her 'newlywed Christmas package' as she called it, which kept them occupied for nearly two hours. Of course, by the end, they were covered in frosting, making for interesting clean-up, which ultimately led to more sex on the kitchen counter. While the house was still kid-free, they decided to make the most out of it, because they knew it wouldn't always be that way.

Now it was dinner time, which they enjoyed in front of the fireplace, curled up next to one another with a bottle of wine and the Italian meal they'd made. It was a very low-key Christmas, which had been exactly what they both wanted. No singing Christmas carols, no decking halls, just the two of them and Charlie, having a quiet day at home.

"So..." Meredith said as she twirled spaghetti on her fork. "Charlie Brown? Kind of a loser, huh?" she asked rhetorically.

Derek laughed amusedly. Watching holiday movies with Meredith always made for an interesting event. When they'd watched The Grinch a few days before, she rolled her eyes at the people of Whoville, claiming they were idiots for warmly welcoming the Grinch after he'd stolen everything. Now they were watching A Charlie Brown Christmas, and so far, her commentary was giving Derek a new outlook on the movie he'd seen countless times since he was a child.

"What do you mean?"

"All he does is bitch and moan about everything. He's what? Ten? Lighten up..." Meredith shrugged with a mouth full of pasta.

"Yeah, I guess," Derek chuckled before taking a sip of wine. "It's more about learning to appreciate the real meaning behind Christmas, not the material things," he explained. "I don't think you're supposed to read too much into it."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "I'm just saying, he's a loser," she giggled.

"Fine," he grinned, leaning in to kiss her. "He is."

"Hmm...thank you."

When they broke the kiss, Derek raised his head and kissed her temple. "I'm glad it's just us today--no offense to our friends, it's just...nice to spend time alone with you," he said softly.

"It is," Meredith smiled. "If everyone was here, we wouldn't have been able to have sex on the counter this afternoon."

"When we have kids, we won't be able to do that," he pointed out.

"It's okay; they'll have enough to play with to keep themselves occupied for a little while. We can sneak into the laundry room or something," Meredith smirked, taking a bite of garlic bread. "You can do me on top of the dryer."

Derek grinned at her. "Well, that's romantic."

"It will be," Meredith teasingly assured him before sighing. "It sucks that we have to work on New Years this year. That's _not_ going to be romantic..."

"I'll make sure you're on my service that day," he nodded. "We'll make it as fun as we can."

Meredith smiled after sipping her wine. "Thank you."

"I worked on New Years last year and it wasn't too bad. Most people save the holiday trauma for today. The occasional firework mishap, but nothing too extreme," Derek shrugged.

"You worked on New Years?"

Derek took a bite of chicken and nodded. "Yeah. Nothing better to do..." he said regretfully. Last New Years, they were barely even speaking. Never did he expect to be married on this one. If there was one thing to be thankful for, it was that.

"I went to Joe's, rang in the New Year with Alex and a table full of beers," Meredith said, wiping some sauce off her fingers with a napkin. "Didn't think I'd have a husband this year," she said, her tone lightening as she smiled at him.

"I'm glad you do." He gently squeezed her hand, then kissed the top of it.

"Me too."

Derek noticed that both of their plates were nearly empty, so he smiled at her. "Cookies?"

"You mean the ones we made?" she asked coyly. "That resulted in you licking frosting off of my boobs."

"I still don't know how that got there," he chuckled. "But either way, I'm glad it did."

"I'd love one," Meredith giggled.

Derek hopped up off the floor, taking their empty dinner plates with him. "Okay, I'll be right back."

Meredith readjusted the blanket over her lap, glancing over at Charlie, who lay contentedly next to her on the floor. She knew their dog enjoyed having them home for the holiday. He was always cuddled up next to them, and both Derek and Meredith appreciated the time they got to spend with him at home before they returned to work. It was nice, having a few days to themselves. Work had been exhausting since the end of October, thanks to the kick-off to the holiday season, and they were lucky to get one day a week off. Spending time lounging around on the couch, catching up on sex, and eating home cooked meals was a nice payoff to the insanity of the holiday rush at the hospital.

She scratched the top of Charlie's head and smiled. Life was good, and she wouldn't trade her own for anything. "Got them," Derek announced as he walked back into the room, a plate full of decorated gingerbread men cookies.

"Izzie would be ashamed," Meredith joked when she saw him. "I mean, I'm sure they taste good, but our frosting art needs some work."

Derek took his place next to her on the floor, setting the plate between them. "They're not so bad. Your gingerbread surgeon actually looks good," he complimented.

"You're mocking me," she accused, licking a little bit of frosting off her finger to see how it tasted.

"I am not," Derek countered. He picked a cookie of his own off the dish and bit into it. "The blue scrubs and surgical cap...impressive. You know you can actually modge podge that and save it?"

"Modge podge? You mean like the arts and crafts stuff?" she asked. "How do you know that?"

Derek laughed. "I have four very crafty sisters. Half of the stuff on my mom's Christmas tree is stuff they made when they were little. I'm telling you, you can modge podge anything," he responded, setting her surgeon cookie aside. "It could be our very first Christmas ornament as a married couple."

"Seriously?" she asked. Leave it to Derek to not only compliment her kindergarten level art project, but also want to preserve it for a lifetime.

"Yes," he nodded. "I love it."

"Corny," Meredith giggled.

He leaned in and kissed her. "Family traditions, remember? You think I'm corny now, just wait until we have kids..." he grinned.

"Well, with kids it's okay," she said playfully. "And fine. We can save it, if you really want to."

"I really do," he echoed.

Meredith wrapped the blanket more fully around them and snuggled into Derek's side. "This was a really nice Christmas," she said, pressing her lips to his neck.

"It's the first Christmas in...a long time," he sighed, "...that I've loved every minute of."

"Hmm...me too," Meredith whispered. "Christmas stopped being fun when I was five."

Derek hugged his wife closer to him; he knew holidays were admittedly less than pleasant in the Grey home, and though those memories were in the past, it still filled Derek with pangs of sadness for Meredith. Holidays were supposed to be magical and exciting and fun as long as they could be, before adulthood set in and all of that magic is suddenly taken for granted.

"When we have our own kids running around on Christmas day, it'll make up for all of the crappy Christmases; I promise," Derek said reassuringly, kissing the top of her head.

Meredith ran her palm over his cheek, feeling the familiar stubble on her fingertips. "I love you," she said softly.

"I love you too," he replied just as quietly, twirling a wavy lock of her hair in between his fingers. "Merry Christmas, Meredith."

She took a moment to appreciate just how much she loved the man next to her, then smiled. "Merry Christmas, Derek."

**Sappy, I know. But MerDer deserve a nice Christmas, right? Reviews mean so much to me. :)**


	61. Here's to the Future

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no. It's not mine.**

**FYI, this fic is still set in 2008. Not sure if it matters, but this is the New Year's chapter, so I thought it was kind of important to mention. Enjoy! :)**

Meredith always thought it was strange that people made such a big deal out of New Year's. It happened once a year, every year. So why it was so special, she'd never understood. When she was younger, it was just an excuse to get drunk, wear a party hat, blow a kazoo at midnight, then get laid. But now that she was settled down, married, and actually enjoyed quiet nights at home, she began to understand the fuss. New Year's was a holiday. A holiday that most people got to spend outside of work, where partying then getting laid was possible. Sure, she and Derek could sneak off and get laid, but partying wasn't really an option. Not when she was stuck at the nurses' station charting, secretly hoping that her pager would go off and it would be Derek, asking her to scrub in on something. Anything.

She set her pen down on the desk and sighed. Only eight thirty in the evening, and she still had a fun night on-call ahead of her. Getting stuck at the hospital tonight was simply luck of the draw, Meredith knew, but it still sucked. Just as she was about to continue writing down her post-op notes, Derek walked up behind her and kissed her cheek. "Hey you," he grinned.

Meredith smiled when she felt his lips on her skin. "Hmm...hey," she said softly, spinning around in her chair to face him. "I haven't seen you much today."

"I looked for you earlier to scrub in with me on a nerve repair, but I saw on the board that you got pulled into a splenectomy," Derek said.

"Yeah, Bailey let me do the whole thing practically by myself. I think she wanted to get home before Tuck fell asleep," Meredith explained. She leaned back in her swivel chair and sighed. "This sucks."

"I know," Derek agreed, running his fingers through her hair. "But I have a surprise..."

Meredith eyed her husband curiously. "Huh?"

"The hospital isn't too busy tonight. We'll be able to sneak away for a few hours later on. So..." he said, trying to downplay his excitement. "I planned something for us."

"Does this involve you sexing me in the linen closet? If it does, there's no need to wait. I'm bored," she giggled, sticking her pen back into her pocket.

Derek sat on the ledge of the nurses' station desk and smirked. "That's not the surprise, but we can still have sex in the linen closet."

"Right now?" Meredith asked. She should have been more focused on getting the surprise out of Derek, but the prospect of sneaky closet sex made thinking about anything else difficult. Closet sex with Derek was always a nice way to pass time at work.

"Lead the way," Derek chuckled. He took her hand and they nonchalantly walked toward an empty hallway with a linen closet. Luckily no one was around, so they could not-so-secretly enter and close the door, locking it from the inside.

Meredith wiggled out of her white coat and tossed it onto a shelf next to some neatly folded bed sheets. "You have a condom, right?" she asked.

Derek nodded, removing his own clothing. "Yeah. In my wallet."

"Okay," Meredith said. She pulled off her scrub top and purple shirt she was wearing underneath, then shimmied out of her pants. "I guess there's a few perks to working here when almost everyone else has the night off," she smiled coyly as she unhooked her bra.

"Guess so," Derek grinned. He grabbed a glow-in-the-dark condom from his wallet, one he'd put in there just for tonight, and put it on while Meredith stepped out of her panties.

"Hmm...glow-in-the dark," she laughed.

"It's a holiday. We're allowed to be kinky today," he replied, quirking his eyebrows at her.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him after he picked her up. "I love you," Meredith whispered.

Derek smiled at his wife. "I love you too."

If they had to spend New Year's Eve at work, this was the way to spend it.

--

After their pre-midnight celebrating in the closet, they managed to exit as unnoticed as when they entered. "Now what?" Meredith giggled.

Derek glanced at his watch. "It's only nine thirty. No pages still, which is a good sign."

"So this surprise? What is it exactly?" Meredith asked sweetly, biting her lower lip.

"Cute," Derek smirked. "Still not telling you."

"I just gave you sex. Not telling me is just mean," she said jokingly. No matter how much she ogled him, she knew he wouldn't fess up. But it was still fun to try.

"You know, they're called surprises for a reason," Derek reminded her just as her pager went off.

Meredith unclipped it from her scrub pants. "Solo appy?" she read aloud before gasping. "Was this...is this?"

"Not my surprise," he chuckled. "Go kick ass in the OR. I have some things to do anyway."

"But why would they give me an appy?" she asked, still confused.

"Because," Derek responded, wrapping his arms loosely around her and kissing her. "You're brilliant. And capable. And you know it," he smiled. "Go. I'll meet you in the scrub room afterward."

"Okay," Meredith said excitedly. Derek squeezed her hand supportively and kissed her once more. When she ran off down the hall toward the OR, Derek couldn't help but grin proudly. If anyone deserved a solo surgery, it was Meredith. And seeing her happy was worth more than anything to him. Even sneaky closet sex.

While Derek waited for Meredith to finish up with her surgery, he found a quiet hallway and dropped down onto an empty gurney. Meredith's surprise was all ready to go, and with the extra time he had, he decided to call his mother. He'd spoken to her on Christmas, but a New Year's call was a requirement too. He dialed his old phone number and waited for her to pick up. As soon as she answered, Derek could tell she was smiling.

"Derek! I've been waiting for your call. How are you doing, sweetheart?" Linda asked, her voice raised a little higher to be heard over the noise of the grandkids playing in the background.

Derek smiled. "I'm good, just wanted to call while I had some time. Mer and I got stuck at the hospital tonight, so I'm just waiting for her to get out of surgery," he explained as he glanced at his watch. 10:28. Meredith's surgery would probably be over in the next fifteen minutes.

"Oh I'm sorry," Linda frowned. "You couldn't get the night off?"

"I'd rather be home," Derek admitted. "But it was either work tonight or work next weekend. Lesser of two evils, I guess. It's okay though; the hospital isn't too busy, so I've been spending time with Meredith."

"Well, that's good. I hope you're making it a nice day for her. The first New Year's as a couple should be a romantic one," Mrs. Shepherd said wisely.

Derek was thankful that his mother couldn't see the smirk on his face as he thought back to an hour ago in the linen closet. But instead of sharing that information, he simply said, "Yeah. We had lunch together and I'm hoping we can find a few minutes at midnight," he grinned. "Oh, by the way, happy 2009," Derek chuckled as the realization of the time difference crossed his mind. After one AM in New York.

"And you too--at midnight of course," his mother laughed.

"Did you do anything fun this year?"

"Liz, Amy and Kathleen came over with the boys and the kids. Nancy wasn't able to fly down because of all the snow Connecticut got over the weekend. We still had fun though. The kids all banged pots and pans and Kyle woke up screaming. Poor baby. It took Amy an hour to calm him down," Linda chuckled amusedly. "I miss having you here, sweetheart."

"I know; I miss you guys too," Derek smiled sadly as he hopped off the gurney and headed for OR 2 where Meredith was probably finishing up with the appendectomy. "We'll try to fly out, maybe next year."

"You know I would love a visit any time. You're always welcome here," Linda offered. "Okay, well, I don't want to keep you. Tell Meredith and Mark I said hello, and that I love them," his mother said sweetly. "And enjoy the New Year."

Derek smiled. "Thanks mom. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetheart," she replied.

After they said their goodbyes, Derek flipped his phone shut and dropped it into his pocket. He reached the scrub room just as Meredith's patient was being wheeled out of the OR after surgery to post-op. Successful, just as he knew it would be. He pushed the door open and smiled at her. "Hey."

Meredith turned on the sink. "Hey," she breathed. "I did it. All by myself."

"See? Brilliant," Derek grinned, leaning against the wall, his hands in his pockets to keep things sterile. "And while you were off kicking solo ass, I managed to get everything ready for you, and I called my mom."

"Oh good; I was going to ask if you called her," Meredith said, drying her hands with a paper towel.

"She said to say hi, and that she loves you," Derek relayed. He kissed her cheek after the exited the scrub room. "And she asked me if I was making New Year's special for you," he smirked. Meredith's eyes went wide and she gasped. "I didn't tell her about the sex in the closet. I'm not _that_ close with my mom..." he chuckled.

Meredith sighed, shaking her head. "Ass..."

"You won't be saying that when you see what I have planned for you," Derek said smugly. He laced his fingers through hers and they walked toward the elevator.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"The elevator."

Meredith nudged him with her hip. "Again. Ass."

"Just come on," Derek chuckled.

They stepped into the elevator and Derek pressed the up button, taking them to the fifth floor. Meredith bit her lip curiously the whole time, wondering what the hell her husband had planned for her. When the doors opened, he led her down the hallway. She was almost waiting for the fireworks or string quartet or whatever it was Derek was up to, to pop out at her. But when they reached his office door, Meredith cocked her head and wondered aloud. "Huh?"

He just smiled, opened the door and led her inside. As he shut the door behind him and locked it, Derek turned on a small light on his desk. "You and I are going to celebrate..."

"What?"

"Turn around," he chuckled.

When she did, she gasped. "Der..."

Meredith was met with champagne flutes filled with sparkling apple cider, because drinking alcohol on the job wasn't exactly allowed, take-out containers, a TV, and a pull-out couch, complete with a blanket and pillows, as if they were spending a night at home.

"How did you...?" she asked speechlessly. "Where'd the couch come from?"

"Part of your Christmas gift," Derek smiled. They both walked over to the new pull-out couch and dropped down onto the mattress. Meredith ran her fingers over the soft sheets, in awe of what her husband had done for her. "I couldn't get it delivered on time; it just came this morning."

"You bought a fancy new couch for New Year's?" she giggled.

Derek kicked his shoes off and Meredith followed suit. They scooted toward the back of the couch wearing just socks and scrubs. Even though they were in Derek's work office, lounging around on a couch-bed was surprisingly cozy and comfortable. "No--well, tonight too. But I figured it would be nice," he shrugged. "Now whenever we're on call, we can sleep in here. I know you said before that sleeping on those on call beds made your back sore, so I sprung for the pillow top mattress. It's the best mattress out there, just like our bed at home."

Meredith took his hand and held it in her own, grateful to have someone that would do that just for her. "You did?"

"Yeah," he said as he pulled a brass key from his pocket. "This is for you. It's a key to my office. So if you're ever on call and I'm not, you can come up here; hang out, sleep...just somewhere you can escape to. I wanted to do something nice for you, that's all."

"Derek," Meredith said sweetly. "Thank you," she whispered, wrapping her arms around her husband.

Derek kissed her cheek. "I love you, Mer. So much."

"I love you too," she replied, holding on tightly to him. When they eventually pulled back, Meredith slipped the key into her pocket for safe keeping, making a mental note to attach it to her set of keys.

"You hungry?" Derek asked as he flipped on the TV he'd snagged from the trailer. No New Year's was complete without countdown coverage. And because the TV at the trailer was just going to waste, he decided to keep it here for the sole purpose of watching it on nights like this; for one or both of them to enjoy if they felt like it.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, running a hand over her stomach. She hadn't eaten since lunch with Derek this afternoon, and the hunger pangs were starting to get to her. "What'd you get?"

"Italian. Chicken parm and spaghetti. I know it's your favorite," Derek said with a knowing smile, producing a tray and setting it down on top of the bed. He placed two takeout containers on top of it, one for each of them.

Meredith moaned as she breathed in the delicious food in front of her. "It smells so good," she said. "And it's still warm. How'd you manage that?"

"I had it delivered a little after you got called into surgery. And right before I called my mom, I heated it back up," he explained simply, handing her a glass of the sparkling apple cider.

"You really did all of this for us?" she asked, still awestruck by his gesture.

"I love you. I'd do anything to see you happy," Derek shrugged. He kissed her cheek; his stubble tickled her skin and she giggled.

She propped some pillows around her like a fort, then pulled the blanket over both of their laps before he slid the tray closer to them. "Well, I appreciate it," she smiled gratefully.

"Not too cheesy?" he asked as a joke.

"No," Meredith retorted. "It's perfect." She twirled some spaghetti around her fork and put the heaping portion into her mouth. "This is delicious," she said with her mouth full.

"I'm glad you like it," Derek chuckled as he bit into a piece of his own chicken parm. Normally, he didn't eat such heavy meals, but he figured it was acceptable on New Year's. Or the whole holiday season for that matter. "Oh, breadsticks," he recalled, reaching for them in the paper bag he'd set on the floor next to them.

"You're so getting sex tonight," Meredith giggled, taking a sip of her cider.

Derek grinned smugly at her and handed her a breadstick. "I already got sex tonight."

"More sex then," she corrected.

"There's a cheesecake in the mini-fridge over there," Derek added. Cheesecake was her favorite, and New Year's wouldn't be complete without it. And it was also likely to score him more sex.

Meredith eyed her husband curiously as she contemplatively chewed on her chicken parm. "You really want to get in my pants, huh?" she teased.

"I always want that," he said, laughing. "We can save sex for later. Right now, I just want you to relax. No better way to do that than food and TV."

"What are we watching?" Meredith asked, shimmying closer to Derek. The stresses of work were slowly melting away as she unwound. If they weren't wearing their scrubs and still within the four walls of the hospital, it would have been as good as a night at home.

"New Year's Rockin' Eve—not live, obviously 'cause we're in Seattle. But still entertaining." Derek looked at the countdown clock on the TV: fifty-one minutes to go until 2009.

"Is this that cheesy thing that Ryan Seacrest does?" she questioned, giggling. "Izzie and George watched this last year while Alex and I were at Joe's drinking the night away."

"Sounds like fun," Derek mused before taking a sip of his drink. "I used to watch this when I was little, back when Dick Clark hosted it. We even went once. Did the whole Times Square thing and froze our asses off," he chuckled.

Meredith licked some spaghetti sauce off her finger and glanced over at him. "How old were you?"

"Fifteen, I think. My mom and Mark's parents drove us all there. It was fun…we got to eat way too much junk food and some drunk guy spilled beer on Nancy's coat. Good times," he recalled humorously.

"I lost my virginity on New Year's Eve," Meredith disclosed, a smile coming over her face when she noticed the stunned look on Derek's. "What? I told you the story before...frat party my sophomore year of college, Greg, drunk sex in my dorm..."

"I didn't know it was New Year's Eve," Derek rebutted.

Meredith shrugged half-heartedly. "It sucked anyway. Drunk sex was only ever good with you," she complimented, resting her head on his shoulder.

"And same for me," he chuckled. Derek kissed the crown of her head, breathing in her soft scent. There was something so comforting about just being near her that made him never want to leave her side.

She set her fork down and ran her fingers through his hair. When she kissed him then, she could taste the marinara and cider on his mouth. "Hmm...you taste good," she giggled.

"So do you," he whispered, resting his forehead against hers.

"It's almost midnight," Meredith pointed out as she worried her fingers at the curls on the back of his neck. "Thirty three minutes..."

Derek smiled at her. "We need to make resolutions then."

Meredith bit into a breadstick, looking at him inquiringly. "Seriously?"

"We could..." he said. "Next year is going to be a good one."

"Okay," Meredith agreed, deciding to placate him and go along with resolution-making. She'd never been one to make them, but figured it would be a good time to start. "Um...okay, well next month, I'm going to start on neuro. So I want to spend more time watching how you do things...the way you operate, how to use good judgment, stuff like that," she vowed.

Derek grinned proudly at his wife. "And I promise to teach you everything I know. And let you do as much as you can."

"Okay," she said softly, gently squeezing his hand.

"What else?" he asked. He kissed her temple then hopped up off the bed to retrieve the cheesecake. They were still finishing up with dinner, but knew that Meredith would gladly accept a piece of cheesecake any time. When she saw it, she dropped back against the pillows and giggled.

"I'm going to gain ten pounds by the time midnight rolls around," she smirked, fork in hand.

"That's okay. We'll burn it off with all the sex we're having tonight," he said with a grin as he cut her a slice.

Meredith accepted her plate and gave into the calories. "Hmm...true.

"Oh! Another one..." Derek began, slicing his own piece of cake. "Baby."

"Baby," Meredith whispered, unable to hide her smile. The idea of making a baby with Derek was never far from her mind; it thrilled her more than any surgery ever could. "How do we make resolutions for that?"

"Well, we could...relax more. The less stressed we are, the easier it'll be," he suggested, much to Meredith's amusement. Relaxing wasn't exactly an easy feat to accomplish given their work schedule.

Still though, she nodded. "Okay, we could try to do that. And we could have lots of practice, even though we're already good at practicing."

Derek chuckled. "We are. More couldn't hurt though..."

"Relaxing, sex, and surgery? That's what we're gonna do more of?" she giggled. "Aren't resolutions supposed to be a challenge?"

"We've had enough hard stuff. It's time to focus on the good stuff," he said with a smile, tilting her chin towards him and kissing her again.

The news coverage interrupted their conversation when the ten minute mark was announced. Meredith sighed contentedly, thankful to be spending the turn of the new year with her husband. She frowned a little when she thought of their dog. "Charlie would have enjoyed this."

"I'm sure Izzie and Alex are treating him well," Derek assured her, glad that they offered to take the dog for the night. All of the firework noise would have scared him, so it was nice to know he had company, even if both Meredith and Derek wished they could have been spending time with their dog tonight.

"Next year, we'll plan our days off way in advance, so we can be home," Derek said, wrapping his arm around her.

Meredith turned to him and smiled a little. "I could be pregnant this time next year," she said in astonishment, as though it were the first time she ever really thought about it.

"Hmm..." Derek grinned. "Yeah."

"Kinda freaks me out a little," she confessed, raising a forkful of cheesecake to her lips. When Derek looked to her, concerned, Meredith quickly shook her head. "Not like that," she assured him. "I'm just...excited. I never thought I'd have babies--or want babies. But with you, I can't imagine not having them."

Derek smiled before kissing her, soft and gentle. "Me either."

"We have a lot to look forward to," Meredith whispered. Her M.O. used to be taking things one day at a time; that was all she could handle. Now though, she welcomed whatever the future had in store for them with open arms. With Derek by her side, she was fearless.

"A lot's changed in twelve months," Derek agreed as he poured more cider into their glasses. "All for the better."

"We built our dream house, got married, got a dog, and now we have baby plans. I'd say so," she giggled.

Cheers and claps from the television escalated as the ten second mark was announced. Meredith looked to him and smiled. "Here's to the future, Derek," she said softly, raising her glass and clinking it against his. When the ball dropped and the new year was officially upon them, fireworks went off not too far away, and the splashes of color shone in through the windows of Derek's office. It was bright and beautiful, exactly how Derek hoped it would be for them.

He leaned in and wrapped his arms around his wife. Right before he pulled her in for their first kiss of 2009, Derek grinned happily. Life had blessed them ten times over, and not a second went by when he didn't appreciate that. "Here's to the future," he echoed.


	62. Exhausted

**Disclaimer: I don't own it; I only wish I did.**

**Thanks for the reviews! :)**

In addition to the new year and all of its shiny resolutions came the added stress of a surgical specialty. With the fourth year of residency quickly approaching in July, it was time to start honing in on that area of surgery that residents would pursue as their chosen field. Meredith knew from early on that neuro was where she belonged. Even as a child, paging through her mother's surgical textbooks, the brain always fascinated her. And it still did, even more so now that she had a husband that was always willing to teach her and let her scrub in whenever she wanted to and was able to.

Right now though, there was nothing more she wanted to do than sleep. The soft sunlight pouring in through the window of Derek's office told her it was probably close to six o'clock, just a half hour until rounds. The sofa bed Derek got them as part of her Christmas gift had become one of her new best friends. Knowing that at the end of a tough day, she and Derek could escape up to the fifth floor, lock the office door, and have their own secluded sleepovers away from the hustle and bustle of the surgical floor on call rooms was something she always looked forward to, now more than ever.

Meredith rolled over in the bed and glanced at the clock on Derek's desk. 5:54. She ran a hand through her hair, mussed and wavy from sleeping, then sighed at Derek's absence. Maybe he'd gotten paged earlier this morning and hadn't wanted to wake her. Derek knew how exhausted Meredith had been lately, so letting her get a few extra hours of rest was probably a good idea.

After regretfully getting out of bed and folding it back into the sofa, she slipped on her shoes, grabbed her pager, cell phone and coat, and walked down the hall toward the elevator. Glancing at her watch, Meredith estimated the amount of time it would take her to get showered and dressed, get coffee, and shove down a quick breakfast. She'd gotten it all down to a science lately. Fifteen minutes spent getting showered and changed, five minutes for coffee and food, and the remainder spent getting prepped for rounds. Life was exhausting these past few weeks, but Meredith knew it would all be worth it.

She made her deadline with three minutes to spare, during which time she leaned against her cubby, coffee mug in hand and closed her eyes. Drained didn't even begin to describe how Meredith felt, but little could be done to relieve the constant exhaustion.

Izzie entered the lounge with a bag full of muffins and immediately frowned when she noticed Meredith dozing off while standing up. She set the bag down on the table. "Mer," she said softly. "You okay?"

"Hmm?" Meredith asked, her eyes popping open. "Oh. Yeah. I'm good, just tired."

"I want you to eat one of these. It'll keep your sugar up," Izzie instructed before frowning. "You should take the morning off, get some sleep. Bailey would probably let you," she said, handing Meredith a large blueberry muffin.

Meredith shook her head. "Can't. I'm down in the ER until noon, then I'm on neuro rotation with Derek. I'm fine Iz, really," she said unconvincingly.

Izzie looked to Meredith with a disbelieving eye. They were as close as sisters, and she could see right through Meredith's act. "If you pass out over an open brain, don't think I won't say 'I told you so,'" she warned.

"Iz..." Meredith groaned, but still taking a bite of the muffin.

"Fine, fine. I'll stop. I'm just worried," Izzie said in explanation.

Meredith smiled. "I know. But I'm fine. Promise."

When Izzie's questioning had finally ceased, Meredith and Izzie joined the others for rounds, which had gone surprisingly well. Patients didn't bitch and moan like they usually did, and there was no vomit. That always made for smooth rounds.

Derek texted her, saying he had some free time until she was scheduled to scrub in on an aneurysm removal at one, so Meredith asked him to meet her down in the pit. If anyone could make that task a little more enjoyable, it was Derek. He found her standing at the nurses' station, writing out a prescription for allergy medicine, so he walked over to her, eager to help her out any way he could.

"Hey," he smiled, kissing her temple. "Anything I can do?"

Meredith turned to her husband and returned the smile. "Hey. If you wanted to take curtain three, I could go take the girl in curtain one for x-rays."

Derek nodded in agreement. "Okay," he said. He studied her face for a moment and pursed his lips. "You okay? You look..."

"Don't finish that sentence," Meredith smirked. "I know I look tired. Izzie already gave me a whole speech about it."

He brushed some hair off her forehead and kissed her. "Okay." In the few seconds of intimacy they shared, she was already anxious to find a nice quiet spot to relax with him. It made the prospect of crawling into bed with him tonight even more appealing.

Working in the ER was always an interesting feat, and hardly ever a walk in the park. Just as Meredith was directing a gurney into the trauma bay doors, a car swerved into the drop off zone. Whenever that happened, it was never good. All alone, Meredith hurried over to the car and peered into the windows, trying to assess what the emergency could be. When she saw a pregnant, contracting woman in the backseat, she sighed. _It was one of those days_.

She opened the car door and gave the woman a reassuring nod. "It's okay. I'm going to help," she said.

"The baby is coming fast! She's not gonna make it into the hospital," her husband replied frantically.

Meredith peered down and noticed how the baby's head was already emerging. The adrenaline suddenly took over and the sleepiness she'd been feeling all but disappeared. "Okay..." she stalled. "I'll be right back. Just keep breathing. And don't push," Meredith instructed.

She ran back into the ER for supplies when she noticed Derek setting a patient chart in the bin. While grabbing gloves, sterile sheets, a blanket, a suctioning bulb, and a pair of scissors, Meredith called his name. Right now, he was the only one in the room not doing anything too important, so he would have to help. Plus, he kept her calm. "Derek!" she shouted over the noise. He glanced at her, giving her his full attention.

"Come with me," Meredith ordered.

Derek quickly met up with her as she made her way for the ER doors. "What are we doing?"

"Neuro, maternity...they're interchangeable skills, right?" she asked, not caring how little it made sense. "'Cause we're about to deliver a baby in a car..."

"Okay," he agreed. Saying no probably wasn't the best move, so he opted not to.

When they reached the car, the birthing woman was doing her best not to push, despite the contractions that wracked her body. Meredith immediately sat on the edge of the car seat and draped the area as best she could, while Derek stood just outside the door, ready to help when she needed it. When she had done all she could do to keep things sterile, Meredith nodded.

"Okay, I want you to push on the next contraction," she said calmly. "The baby's head is almost out."

Though a moment of high stress, Derek couldn't help but admire how well Meredith was handling it all. How she never froze in a crisis and always did what needed to be done. He'd always admired that about her.

On the next contraction, the woman pushed and her baby's head emerged. Meredith nodded and held it in place. "That's good. Just relax for a second, okay?"

Derek handed her the suctioning bulb so she could clear the infant's airway, which she completed with ease. Setting the bulb in her lap, Meredith instructed the woman to push again. The shoulders were passed through and after another push, the baby slipped into Meredith's arms. "It's a girl," she announced, smiling.

After the father reached around and cut the umbilical cord, Derek wrapped the blanket around the newborn to keep her warm on the chilly January day. "Congratulations," Derek grinned. "She's got a healthy set of lungs," he chuckled.

"Thank you," the new mother said gratefully despite her exhaustion, and the husband echoed his praise.

Meredith simply nodded and smiled. "Let's get the three of you inside."

Derek ran back into the ER with the newborn safely cradled in his arms, and within minutes, the parents were inside, admitted, and on their way up to the OB wing with Meredith and Derek in tow. The two of them gave the woman's OB a rundown of what happened, and signed and dated all of the papers stating that they were the ones to deliver the infant. It was all so quick that they barely got a moment to take in their small victory. On their way out the door, Mr. and Mrs. Halley, the parents' names they'd just learned, stopped Meredith and Derek to express their gratitude one last time.

"Thank you both. So much," Mr. Halley said with tears in his eyes. "Our car kept stalling and by the time we got on the road, Lisa was ready to push and we just...thank you."

Derek let Meredith take the credit, for she was the one that really deserved it. He just stood back and smiled while she spoke. "Oh, it's...it's no problem. I'm just glad we were able to help. And congratulations, she's beautiful." Meredith smiled at the newborn wrapped warmly and sleeping in her mother's arms.

"Thank you," Mrs. Halley whispered, unable to take her eyes off their new daughter.

After Derek and Meredith said their goodbyes, Derek pulled her into the stairwell and kissed her. She smiled against his lips. "What's this for?"

"Mer, you just delivered a baby in a car all by yourself. You have no idea how proud I am of you," Derek grinned, combing his fingers through her hair.

Meredith rested her head against his chest and yawned. The adrenaline was wearing off, and the overwhelming urge to crawl up in a corner and take a nap was settling in once again. "Hmm...what time is it?"

"Twelve thirty," he said. "Don't worry, while you were filling out paperwork back there, I pushed the surgery back an hour."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. "So does that mean I can sleep?"

Derek kissed her forehead and smiled. "You should eat something, Mer. Delivering babies is hard work..." he joked.

"I just caught it. I didn't push it out," she managed to giggle, still in his embrace.

"Still. Food is good. And we're gonna be in surgery for a few hours. Come on, humor me," Derek said, trying his best to sound convincing. He knew that when Meredith was tired and stressed out, she never had much of an appetite. There were times when sleeping was just so much more appealing than eating.

Meredith rolled her eyes at Derek's great concern for her and nodded. "Fine."

"We can have sex too, if you wanted to. I know that helps you unwind," he pointed out with a smirk, though he knew it was the truth.

"Hmm, you know how we just saw a baby come out of a vagina? Doesn't exactly put mine in the mood," she sighed.

"Guess not," he laughed, running his hands soothingly down her back.

Meredith breathed him in and smiled contentedly; Derek always smelled good, even after hours in the OR. "Thank you for helping me, by the way. I didn't have time to page anyone from OB, and I figured you would help keep me calm."

"Mer, you were incredible out there. If I were a third year resident, I don't know if I would have been able to handle that so well. You did good; I'm proud of you." Derek kissed the top of her head and chuckled. "You're just as good at OB as neuro."

"Maybe I should switch then..." Meredith mused teasingly, playing with the lapel of his coat.

Derek smirked at his wife. "I'd miss working with you too much."

"Yeah, I guess I'd miss working with you too. I get to keep you in line," she giggled.

They began the walk toward the elevator down to the cafeteria so they could eat something before scrubbing in, and he wrapped his arm loosely around Meredith's waist. Keeping things professional was important to them, but they were always game for making the occasional exception, especially on tough days like this one.

He pressed the down arrow next to the elevator, then grinned at her. "You're good at that, too."

--

"Ready to begin, Dr. Shepherd?" Derek asked Meredith as they walked into the OR, scrubbed in and eager to start the tumor resection on their ten year old patient.

"Yeah," Meredith breathed. She took her normal place next to Derek over the young boy's shaved head, prepped for the incision.

Derek grinned beneath his surgical mask, his eyes sparkling at her. "Well, go ahead."

"By myself?" she asked, dumbfounded. Derek had always let her help, but doing a surgery like this all by herself was practically unheard of.

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "I know you can do it."

Meredith's heart pounded away in her chest. Once again, adrenaline and excitement trumped her tiredness. "Wow. Uh...okay," she said decisively. "Scalpel."

Derek watched as Meredith expertly pulled back the correct portion of scalp, and drilled holes into the skull. Her precision and confidence filled him with such pride that he had to keep from kissing her in the middle of the operation. She removed the skull flap and handed it off to Derek, who placed it on the boy's abdomen to preserve circulation and keep the bone viable.

Once inside the patient's brain, Meredith used a probe to locate the tumor in the subdural area, and gently began removing it, maneuvering around blood vessels and vital brain centers. "Suction," she eventually said softly, barely speaking at all as she worked. Chatting during surgery, like Derek did on a daily basis, was a skill that had to be built over time. Right now, Meredith just wanted to focus on the task at hand.

Derek stepped in to suction the pooled blood in the surgical field. A humble job like that was often the work of an intern, but he didn't mind. He was honored to assist her as she saved a life. As he suctioned, he nodded in satisfaction. "Good."

"Thank you," Meredith whispered; Derek could tell she was smiling under her mask. Knowing Meredith was just as proud of herself as he was of her made all the difference. She examined the area for residual bleeding and frowned. "Damn it. Is that an aneurysm?"

Derek sighed. "The tumor must have been obscuring it on the CT. Alright, I'll expose the area a little more to get better visualization, then you can just clip it. You'll be fine."

"Me?" Meredith asked, her voice shaking slightly. Baby delivering, tumor removing, and aneurysm clipping all in one day. Impressive for a third year resident, but frightening as hell at the same time.

"Yeah. You can do it, Mer," Derek said in a soft voice so only she could hear him.

She subconsciously moved closer to him and let out a breath. "Okay."

Derek gently inserted the probe, carefully pulled back on the area right next to the bulging aneurysm to give Meredith more room to clip it, then nodded. "Now just place the clip on the neck of the aneurysm--gently. Be careful not to nick any arteries near it," he instructed.

Meredith worked with just as much surgical delicacy and precision that Derek would have used himself. She was flawless in her technique, just as he knew she would be. "Good," he said softly. "Now close the clip to pinch off the aneurysm."

"Okay."

After completing that task, Derek spoke again. "Now take this..." he said, handing her a needle. "Puncture the clipped portion--"

"To make sure no blood is filling the aneurysm," Meredith finished.

Once again, Derek grinned under his mask. "Exactly." She inserted the needle into the bulge of the aneurysm, and nodded in approval when no blood was leaked from inside. "Good."

"That's it, right?" Meredith asked, a little in awe that she had actually completed the entirety of the surgery by herself.

"That's it."

Meredith looked to her husband and sighed in relief. "I did it."

Derek nodded in agreement, his eyes shining right into hers. Their own little moment of intimacy amidst open brains and the other surgical team. He smiled widely. "You did it."

--

As they scrubbed out, Meredith stared straight ahead, into the OR. Derek noticed the look she had on her face; it was the same one she wore after her first ever surgery. Her _surgical high _face. However proud she was of herself, Derek knew he was at least ten times prouder. "You kicked ass in there."

"I can't believe you let me do that," Meredith breathed, grabbing a paper towel. "That was just..."

"Awesome?" Derek offered.

She giggled. "Awesome is putting it lightly, but yes...awesome." Meredith paused and smiled at him. "Thank you, Derek."

Now that they were out of the OR and alone, Derek was finally able to kiss her. The second he pressed his lips to hers, Meredith closed her eyes and moaned involuntarily. Even after all this time, kissing Derek still made her weak at the knees. "I wouldn't have let anyone else do that," Derek whispered.

"Hmm...is that because I give you sex?" she asked playfully.

Derek raised his eyebrows, smirking at her. "No," he chuckled. "There's some fifth year residents who wouldn't be able to do that. You're...something else, Meredith. It's an honor for me to get to work with you every day. And I mean that," Derek said with nothing but sincerity.

Meredith just smiled softly, lacing her fingers with her husband's. When he said things like that, all of the exhaustion and fear and wondering why she put herself through it all in the first place? Totally worth it.

--

When Meredith walked into their bedroom that night wearing a pair of his pajama pants and a Dartmouth sweatshirt, Derek pulled back the covers on her side of the bed and chuckled. "Those aren't sex clothes, are they?"

"I'm surprised I didn't fall asleep standing up in the shower. Do you really think I'd be game for sex tonight?" she laughed, releasing her damp hair from her ponytail and setting the hair tie on her nightstand. After she crawled into bed next to him, she immediately pressed her body against his.

She rested her head on his chest and he kissed her when she titled her head up to him. "I'm really not in the mood either," he yawned. "Long day..."

Meredith reached her hand up and placed her palm over his cheek. As incredible as the sex was between them, simply curling up under the covers was pretty dam nice, too. "Yeah," she concurred.

She closed her eyes, taking in her husband's presence and warmth. After long days, this was all she wanted to do. Rest in bed with Derek and their dog, who was already sleeping next to Derek's feet. "Were you this exhausted when you were a resident?" she asked.

"Yeah. I was," Derek admitted, running his fingers through her hair. "But it gets better...rotations are tough. It's like having ten specialties at once. But once you're just in neuro, the workload will drop, which is good," he assured her. "You're okay, right? Not feeling sick or anything? You can slow it down, Mer. It's okay," Derek said worriedly, pressing his palm to her forehead.

Meredith shook her head. "No, not sick. Just tired. And to answer your next question...I'm not pregnant," she giggled.

"I wasn't going to ask that," Derek chuckled, pulling the blanket up over her.

"Well Izzie did. But that's just Izzie. She's our baby cheerleader," Meredith sighed amusedly. "I swear she's going to buy us books about conceiving for our anniversary," she joked.

Derek laughed, kissing the top of her head. "Wouldn't surprise me..."

"Trying for a baby in the same month I start my fourth year," Meredith mused out loud. "We're crazy, aren't we?"

"We can do it," Derek said, his voice strong and reassuring. "It's good that we're waiting until July to start trying. Fourth year residents hone in more on their specific specialties. Less pit work, less hours on-call. More time for baby making sex..." he grinned.

"True..." Meredith giggled, her arm draped over his torso as her head still lay on his chest.

Derek hugged her closer to him, noticing how her eyelids fluttered with the need for sleep. "I love you, Meredith," he whispered, then flicked off the lamp on his nightstand.

Meredith lifted her head and kissed him again, easily finding his lips in the new darkness of their bedroom. She smiled. "I love you too."

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	63. Date Night

**Disclaimer: I really, really wish I did. Owning Grey's is far better than being a college student.**

**Thanks to those that review. It means so much to me. :)**

Derek could tell Mark Sloan was up to something when he stood waiting for him at the coffee cart, two cups of hot coffee in his hands, presumably one for each of them. When Mark spotted Derek approaching him, he grinned and held out the styrofoam cup. "Morning," he greeted.

"What's going on?" Derek asked, not buying into Mark's charms even for a second. He'd known Mark since kindergarten; there was little he could hide from him.

"You and Mer need night off," Mark stated simply, sucking in a breath after taking a sip of the steaming beverage.

Derek rolled his eyes. "Alright, I'll buy it. What are you up to?"

"Come by my apartment tonight..." he began, resulting in a curious stare from Derek.

"Why would Meredith and I just stop by your apartment tonight?" Derek asked.

Mark pushed the button for the elevator and looked to him. "Because I need you to. Can't you just help out a friend?"

"Oh God, what did you do?" Derek asked, exasperated.

"Nothing," Mark said defensively. When Derek's unbelieving stare continued to wear him down, Mark had no choice but to sigh in defeat. "Alright, fine. I met this girl; she lives down the hall from me. And I was hoping you and Mer might wanna come over, hang out..."

"Meredith and I really aren't into foursomes," Derek smirked as the two men stepped onto the elevator.

Mark jabbed the button for the fourth floor with his thumb. "Shut up."

"Fine," he conceded, chuckling. "But I need more info."

"Her name is Bridget. She's a kindergarten teacher. I met her three months ago and we've been out a few times. Satisfied?" Mark asked.

Derek nodded in approval. Three months was a long time in the Sloan Chronicles, so he couldn't help but be a little impressed. And the kindergarten teacher thing helped too. "I didn't know you were seeing anybody. Congrats," he said with a smile.

Mark shrugged it off, running a hand through his short hair. "Yeah well, we're exclusive...ish. And she's not married, so...bonus points, right?" he asked jokingly, thankful that the two of them had moved beyond what had happened in the past.

"Mhm, that's always a plus," Derek managed to laugh.

"Anyway, I thought I'd invite her over...dinner, drinks. Might be fun," he shrugged.

"Okay, but why do Mer and I have to come?" he asked confusedly as the two of them stepped off the elevator.

"Because. You're good wingmen. I can count on you two to put in a good word for me," Mark explained, and Derek swore he actually heard some sincerity in his friend's voice.

Derek smiled after sipping his coffee-bribe. "You really like this girl," he said knowingly.

"I do," he confessed. "So come on. Please?"

He laughed at his friend's apparent desperation. "Mark Sloan...begging?"

"Shut up," he shot back. He paused for a moment before he started speaking again. "Alright, yes, I'm begging."

"Fine," Derek finally agreed. "But I have to check with Meredith. I don't think she has any plans, but I'm not positive."

"Thanks, man. I owe you one." Mark patted Derek on the shoulder as they turned to walk in opposite directions down the hall.

Derek downed another sip of his coffee then shook his head. "More like a hundred. But one is a good start..."

---

At lunchtime, Derek met up with Meredith in his office, where they spent a few days a week eating lunch together. They still enjoyed spending time with their friends, but once in a while, getting away from the busy cafeteria and escaping to their own private space was a nice way unwind. When he opened the door, he found her lying on the couch, socked feet propped up on the arm of it, with a chart resting on her bent knees.

"Hey," Derek greeted. He walked over to her and leaned down to kiss her.

Meredith sighed contentedly against his lips, happy to finally get some quiet time with him. "Hey." She dropped her chart down on the floor. Doctoring could go on hold for an hour; right now was about enjoying alone time with her husband. "What'd you get me?"

"Chicken salad and a side of chips," Derek answered, handing Meredith her food items from the tray. "And a bottle of water, just like you asked for," he winked.

"Thank you," she said cheekily, giving him a small smile.

"So..." he said, deciding to dive right in. "What do you say to going over to Mark's tonight?"

Meredith eyed him with a curious expression. "Huh?"

"He...met someone," Derek explained, dropping down onto the cushion next to her, letting her socked feet rest comfortably on his lap as she still lay somewhat reclined on the sofa. "And he wants us to go over for dinner...I'm guessing he's using the _'I'm best friends with a happily married couple'_ angle to win her over. Anyway, I didn't want to say yes or no before I asked you."

Meredith sipped her water while she thought it over. Dinner at Mark's could go one of two ways: entertaining or slightly disastrous. She wasn't sure which one to put her money on. "Does she work here?"

"No, she lives across the hall or something. Kindergarten teacher...Bridget. They've been dating for a few months," Derek said as he ate a spoonful of Ramen noodles, sharing all the information he had.

"Wow," Meredith replied. Apparently, the new and improved side of Mark impressed her as well. "Well, I was planning on going home, taking my clothes off, and having marathon sex with you all night long. But...I guess we can go to Mark's..." she sighed dramatically.

Derek groaned, dropping his head on the back of the couch. "Damn him."

She bit into a chip and laughed. "That doesn't mean we can't have sex when we get home."

"Still. He's cutting into valuable sex time. Maybe I should just tell him no," Derek said with a smirk.

"No, don't," Meredith said, however regretfully. "It's...he wants us to go. It's important to him. If it's unbearable, we'll just make up some excuse to leave."

"Okay," Derek agreed, running his hand over her leg. "Are you sure though? If you don't feel like it, I can just go."

Meredith smiled at her husband. "And spend my Friday night without you? That's no fun," she giggled. "No, it's fine. And we get free dinner and drinks out of it, so I'm in."

"Hmm, good point."

---

Derek watched amusedly as Meredith stood in front of her open closet doors, wearing nothing but her bra and panties, hands on her hips. "What're you doing?" he asked as he emerged from their bathroom, rolling some deodorant under his arms.

"I don't know what to wear," she sighed. She reached into her closet and tugged on the arm of one of her sweaters, then scrunched her nose.

"Wear anything you want," Derek said simply before smirking at her. "Better yet, take off what you're wearing now."

Meredith giggled, spinning around to face him. "And what good would that do?"

"Well, you'd be naked. And then we could have sex..."

"We don't have time for sex right now," she pointed out. "Later on, all the sex we want. Right now, we need to hurry up."

Derek sighed, grabbing his blue button down shirt off the bed. "Fine..."

Meredith just rolled her eyes and laughed. When it came to sex, her husband really was insatiable. Not that she minded--she was just as enthusiastic. "How's this?" she asked. She pulled a navy blue scoop neck sweater from her closet to show him, holding it up against her body.

"Yeah, that's good," he nodded. "Just dress comfy. Mark's the one that has to impress her, not us," Derek chuckled.

She pulled the sweater over her head, nodding in approval when she looked herself over in the mirror. "So, kindergarten teacher?" she asked as she hopped into a pair of jeans, ones that hugged her body perfectly, and therefore Derek's favorite.

"Usually it's a nurse. Or the coffee cart lady, so this is a nice change," he said humorously. "Never know...she could be the one."

"I just hope she's keeping him away from their innocent five year old minds," Meredith giggled.

"Yeah that wouldn't be good," Derek said in humorous agreement.

"Does he want us to bring anything?" Meredith asked, applying her usual light makeup and letting her soft curls rest lightly on her shoulders.

Derek thought about it for a second and shook his head. "He didn't say to, but I guess we can bring a bottle of wine or something."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She slipped on a pair of flats then walked over to her husband. He looked cute in his blue shirt, one that brightened his eyes, and of course the hair. Even with bed head, Meredith always loved his hair. "You look very handsome," she said softly, tucking her hands into the back pockets of his jeans.

He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "Well, you look beautiful. I need to be up to par," he smiled.

Meredith smiled, resting her head against his chest. He always knew just what to say to her.

--

"Have you ever been here before?" Meredith asked as they took the elevator up to Mark's apartment on the fifth floor.

Derek nodded, letting her step off before him once the doors opened. "Once when I was helping him move in. I haven't seen it fully furnished. You know, the Playboys on the coffee table and take-out decorating the counters," he joked.

"Be nice," Meredith giggled. "He's growing up. It's kind of...sweet," she said, unable to find a better word.

"I guess," Derek shrugged. "Or he just wants to get in her pants."

Meredith gently nudged him with her hip as they reached his apartment. By the third knock, Mark was already at the door. He greeted them with a smile, also looking as suave as Derek. Clean shaven, dressy shirt, clearly pulling out the big guns. "Hey, you two," he grinned. "Thanks for coming."

"Looks nice in here," Derek complimented. He set the bottle of wine down on Mark's countertop then assisted Meredith in removing her coat, which Mark placed neatly on the coat rack.

"And you thought I was incapable of such a thing," Mark teased Derek. "So look, I know Friday night is your sex night, but I really do appreciate you two showing up. It means a lot," he said.

Meredith looked from Mark to Derek with wide eyes. "How does he know it's our sex night?"

"I just assumed. Day off tomorrow, and the fact that you two do it like bunnies. It's charming," Mark grinned, leaning against the kitchen counter.

"So..." Meredith began, wanting nothing more than to change the subject. Just because Mark was correct in his assumption didn't mean that she wanted to elaborate on it. "Where is this Bridget you're so fond of?"

"She should be here soon. Her niece was in a school play tonight, so she's running a little late," Mark explained. "Either of you want a drink?"

"Does Mom know about her?" Derek asked, cracking the seal on the wine bottle and tossing the plastic into the trash. "Or my sisters?"

Mark rolled his eyes. "No. And I'd prefer to keep it that way for a while. They'd be on the next flight out here with the polygraph."

"I'm sure she's great, Mark," Meredith said supportively. Mark had always been supportive of her and Derek, and she wanted to return the favor. "So do you think she could be the one?"

"I dunno," Mark sighed. "I don't even know if I have _'a one.'_"

"Everybody has _'a one,'_" Meredith said, squeezing her husband's hand. Not even she was so sure of this until she met Derek. He'd turned her into a gooey optimist when it came to love, she had to admit.

A knock came from the door and Mark glanced over at it, letting out a deep breath. "Hope so..."

After he opened the door, a petite woman with curly brown hair and a slightly freckled complexion walked through. She bit her lip nervously and smiled. Meredith couldn't help but feel amused by the whole situation, as if she and Derek were in any way threatening or going to interrogate her like protective parents. Bridget gave a small wave.

"Hi, I'm Bridget," she said softly.

"Meredith," Meredith greeted, shaking the woman's hand, then shook Derek's after he, too, introduced himself.

"Hi," Bridget returned politely as Mark took her coat and added it to the growing collection on the coat rack. "Mark told me a lot about you guys."

"Uh oh," Derek joked. The four of them walked out into the living room and took their seats, each couple on their own couch.

Bridget laughed. "Nothing bad, I promise. He told me you two got married last summer. That's great," she said interestedly.

"Yep, we did." Meredith agreed, being warm and receptive of the woman. If Bridget was feeling even half the butterflies Meredith had when she met Derek's family, she wanted to give her all the reassurance she could. "It'll be a year in July."

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's waist and smiled. "And we've loved every second," he added, kissing his wife's temple.

"I was the best man," Mark informed Bridget, grinning proudly. "Did a kickass job, too."

"Oh, I'm sure you did," Bridget teased, rolling her eyes at him.

Meredith smiled inwardly at their playfulness. They reminded her a little of herself and Derek. Not awkward with each other, and not afraid to joke around. And by the way Derek covertly nudged her hip with his led her to know that he felt the same way. "So, kindergarten? Must be fun, huh?" Derek asked.

"It is," she nodded enthusiastically. "Lots of energy but it's worth it. I love the kids; they make me laugh all day and they're so sweet. Mark is probably getting sick and tired of me talking about them all the time," Bridget laughed.

"She teaches over at Brightwater, the private school. Only top notch kids get in there, the ones destined for Harvard," Mark teased. "So most likely, your future offspring," he addressed Meredith and Derek before he went into the kitchen to check on whatever he had in the oven. "I'll be right back."

Derek chuckled amusedly along with his wife. "It's going to be a few years before we have to decide that, but we'll definitely keep it on the short list."

"You two planning on a big family?" Bridget asked before gasping. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer that; none of my business. It's just--Mark told me how he spent a lot of time with your family growing up..." she said nervously.

Meredith waved it off casually. "Oh, we don't care. We get that question all the time. Derek's mom is probably getting impatient with us," she giggled. "We want two, maybe three. Any more than that would push us over the edge, I think."

"Well from what Mark tells me, if anyone can handle it, it's you two," Bridget complimented, taking a sip from her wine glass.

"What has he been telling you?" Derek asked with a slight laugh.

"He just talks about how close you two are, how much you love each other. I think he looks up to you guys, aspires to that, you know?" Bridget said, smiling softly.

Meredith took a sip of her own wine and mirrored Bridget's smile. "You really like him."

She let out a breath, glancing into the small kitchenette to make sure Mark was out of earshot. "Yeah, I do. And he's...told me about his past. The good, the bad. And I think he expected me to run, but I didn't. There's something about him. He's sweet and he cares about me. He's a good man."

Derek nodded, pursing his lips in a small smile. If Mark really did have 'a one' it could very well be the woman sitting across from him. And from the happy look on his wife's face next to him, Derek could tell Meredith felt the same way. "We're so happy for you," Meredith said graciously. "Really, we've never seen Mark this way. You're good for him."

"Steaks should be done soon," Mark announced upon re-entering the living room. He took his former seat next to Bridget on the couch and wrapped his arm around her.

"You cook now?" Meredith asked, giggling.

Mark took a sip of his beer and shrugged. "I've been a bachelor all my life. Had to learn sometime..." he pointed out, then smirked. "You're one to talk, the girl who nearly burnt the hospital down while she toasted a bagel in the lounge."

"Okay, that was once. And only because I got distracted," Meredith said defensively, much to Derek's amusement as he recalled the smoking toaster and ashy bagel he'd rescued from it when Meredith had paged him in a frenzy. That was a fun day at work.

--

The rest of the evening passed in this manner--friendly, easy flowing conversation and good food. It almost felt like Bridget had always been around, the way she fit in with them and wasn't afraid to make jokes or be carefree. By the time Meredith and Derek left, they had decided that spending their night off at Mark's wasn't nearly as horrible as they'd first imagined it would be. Weirdly enough, it was actually enjoyable.

"We should do that again one time," Meredith said. She kicked off her flats and tossed them into her closet, then shimmied out of her jeans. The night was still young enough for sex, and she knew she wouldn't be going to sleep without having a few screaming orgasms first.

Derek dropped his shirt into the laundry basket and nodded. "Yeah, we should," he agreed. "Maybe we could have everybody over sometime, maybe in the spring. Barbecue or something," he suggested.

"We never did have a house-warming party. We kinda suck, huh?" she giggled, letting her sweater fall on top of his shirt in the basket.

"We can chalk it up to being busy with work," Derek laughed. He scooped her up into his arms and gently dropped her down onto their bed, eager to reclaim their sex night that had been put on hold for a few hours this evening.

Meredith tangled her fingers through his hair, smiling when she felt his lips kissing her just above the lace of her bra. "Okay."

"Right now though..."

"Sex," Meredith finished for him. She let herself relax back on the pillows while Derek trailed kisses all along her body. When he reached those super sensitive spots above her panty line, she giggled, her skin erupting into chills. "Derek."

"Hmm..." he chuckled as he eased her panties down her legs and dropped them to the floor. "God, you're beautiful," he whispered, making his way back up her body to kiss her again.

Meredith lifted up onto her elbows and unhooked her bra, tossing it over the side of the mattress. "You need to get naked too," she reminded him.

Derek hopped up off the bed, quickly removed his jeans and boxers, then rejoined her on the bed. "Both naked now," he grinned.

"Much better." Meredith bit her lip and ran her fingers through his hair, eager to make up for lost time, even if it had only been a few hours wait.

"Condom," he said, reaching over into the nightstand drawer and grabbing the first one he found.

Meredith ran her fingers over the length of him before putting it on. Without letting go, she guided him into her, arching her back in bliss when they were finally joined. "Oh God, Derek," she breathed. "I love you so much."

"I love you," he echoed, leaning down and kissing her with everything he had.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled up at her husband, whom she loved more than she'd ever thought it was possible to love another human being. The way he kissed her and made love to her. And afterward, the way he held her in his arms. Meredith laid comfortably snuggled into him, letting herself give in to the happy post-sex fog looming in the air around them. "Do you think everybody has _'a one_?'" she asked him.

Derek pulled her on top of him and wrapped his arms around her back, her body pressed against his. When he looked into Meredith's eyes, there was no trace of doubt in his mind. "Yeah," he whispered. "I do."

Meredith smiled. "Me too."

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	64. Valentine's Day

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but I don't.**

**Thanks for the reviews! :)**

If there was any holiday that a newlywed couple did not want to work on, it was Valentine's Day. But as luck would have it, Meredith and Derek just weren't given that luxury this year. So while other couples were off getting their romance on, theirs had to be put on hold until their shifts were over, which wasn't for another ten hours.

Cristina and Meredith sat in the OR gallery, watching Derek operate on a newborn with hydrocephalus that needed a brain shunt to drain the excess cerebral spinal fluid. Normally, Meredith would be down there in the OR assisting him, but because she got pulled into an emergency surgery earlier this morning, George stepped in and took her place instead, not that Meredith particularly minded. She'd helped Derek do the procedure before, so it wasn't like she was missing out on much anyway.

She leaned back in her chair, her feet propped up on the back of the chair in front of her. "I'm exhausted," she sighed. "Are you exhausted?"

Cristina shrugged as she pulled her hair back into a ponytail. "Exhausted is the new normal," she joked. "When I feel awake, it's weird."

"Last night, I fell asleep on the couch. At eight thirty," Meredith said, embarrassed. "Derek worked late and carried me upstairs when he got home."

"You mean there was no pre-Valentine's Day sexing?" Cristina asked mockingly.

Meredith took a long sip of her coffee then shook her head. "Nope."

"Wow, you must have been _really_ tired then," Cristina said. "You two have sex every night."

"We do not," Meredith corrected. "Most nights, but not _every_ night."

"Okay, thinking of you and McDreamy doing it freaks me out a little," Cristina sighed, resting her head on the back of her chair. "So is he wining and dining you tonight?"

Meredith yawned. "Don't know. Last year, he took me to the Space Needle for lunch and then sexed me all night long, so he's capable of anything," she giggled. "What about you?"

"Owen wants to take me to some French restaurant, but I dunno yet..."

"Cristina," Meredith said, exasperated. "He loves you, and he wants to take you out for Valentine's Day. Every girl's dream. Go."

"Dark and twisty has been replaced with married gooeyness," Cristina teased. "I don't know which one's scarier."

Meredith swatted her friend playfully in the arm. "Shut up. I'm happy." And she really was. Even if Valentine's Day wasn't all that romantic yet didn't mean she woke up any less in love with her husband. Today was just a day to add a bit of cheesiness to it, something Derek was already very good at.

"Well, obviously," Cristina laughed.

"I kinda hope he doesn't have too much planned. Honestly, I'd be happy with a few screaming orgasms and a box of chocolates," Meredith admitted, taking a bite of her granola bar.

"Wow."

Meredith laughed. "What?"

"So much for romance, huh?" Cristina remarked sarcastically.

"Sex with Derek is always romantic. He does this thing where he--" Meredith began before Cristina interrupted, waving her hands in a halting motion.

"Oh God, please leave me in the dark about that one."

"Hey guys," Izzie greeted, dropping down in the seat next to Cristina, her coffee mug in one hand and a chart in the other. "What're we talking about?"

Cristina sighed audibly. "Oh, Meredith is just divulging sex secrets and I'm getting more creeped out by the second."

"Someone is just jealous," Meredith teased, signing her name to a patient chart and flinging it onto the empty chair next to her.

"Hey, I lived with them for a year. Don't think I don't know _all _of those secrets. Believe me, I know..." Izzie said as she stared ahead, eyes wide as some vivid memories of sleeping across the hall from the two of them crossed her mind.

Down in the OR, Derek was just removing his headset and thanking the OR team, signaling the end of his surgery. Meredith hopped up off her seat and grabbed her charts. "Well, I'm going to get laid. Have fun talking about my sex life," she giggled.

After Derek scrubbed out, Meredith met him in the hall, anxious to get a few minutes of alone time with her husband, whom she'd barely gotten to spend any time with yet today besides the drive into work. "Hey," she smiled, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

He and Meredith rarely did PDAs at work, but given the holiday, they both figured it was okay. "Hey," he grinned. Derek glanced around to make sure the hall was clear, then kissed her with all he had, showing her just how much he loved her.

"Hmm," Meredith giggled against his lips. "You're happy."

"It's Valentine's Day. Of course I'm happy," Derek chuckled, pulling off his scrub cap. They walked down the hall toward the nurses' station so they could deposit their collective charts, hoping they could skip away unnoticed for a while. "Aren't you happy?"

"Tired. Hungry. But yes, I'm happy." She smiled at her husband and gently squeezed his hand. "So are you gonna let me in on what you have planned for tonight?"

The two made their way for the elevator down to the cafeteria. Lunch really couldn't have come at a better time, seeing as Meredith's hunger pangs were starting to get annoying. Derek pushed the down arrow and smirked at her. "What do you want to do tonight?"

"Derek."

He laughed, resting his hand on the small of her back so she could enter the elevator before him. "What? Honestly, I didn't plan anything. I figured you would just want take-out on the couch, then sex all night," he explained.

Meredith had to give him credit. Derek knew her far too well. "See? That's why I married you," she said.

"But..." Derek added. "I owe you a dinner. Fancy restaurant this weekend, just the two of us."

"Okay," she said softly, running her fingers through his hair. "We can do that."

"I think if we went out tonight, we'd both fall asleep at the table," Derek joked as they walked off the elevator toward the cafeteria.

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Wanna eat in my office?" he asked.

"Yeah," she nodded, dropping a sandwich, iced tea, and a bag of chips down next to Derek's food on their shared tray. Just as she was about to suggest that they make the most out of their lunch break by having a quickie on the couch, Meredith thought better of it. Bringing up sex in the lunch line probably wasn't a good idea.

They paid for their lunch and made the trek back upstairs to Derek's office, which had become just as much hers as it was his. Since he'd gotten them the couch for Christmas, on-call rooms were a thing of the past; after one night on the fancy pillow-top mattress and there was no way Meredith would ever downgrade.

She tossed her white coat next to Derek's on his desk chair then dropped down onto the couch. Derek set their food on the small coffee table in front of them and kissed her cheek. It may not have been lunch at a five star restaurant with fancy waiters and wine glasses, but this worked for them. Just being together, sneaking away and enjoying the holiday. That was probably more fun anyway.

After they finished eating lunch, he went over to his desk drawer then set a heart-shaped box of chocolates down on her lap; Meredith smiled.

"Thank you," she whispered, leaning in to kiss her husband.

"I had to buy you chocolate. It's a requisite gift for Valentine's Day," Derek chuckled. "And a card, too."

Meredith opened the red envelope and pulled out the card inside. There was a picture of a cartoon squirrel on the cover holding two walnuts in either hand. Meredith laughed and read the card aloud. "_I'm nuts for you_," she giggled, opening it up.

_Mer,_

_I bought this card just so I could hear you laugh. Yes, I'm serious. Happy Valentine's Day. I love you._

_Love, Derek_

She looked over to her husband and smiled widely. "I love it. Thank you."

Derek pressed a kiss to her temple, grinning against her skin. "You're welcome."

When she tore the celophane off the box of chocolates, Derek's smile reached his eyes. "Are you eating them now?"

"Well, you're going to help me. I don't want to be the glutton who eats the whole box. Believe me, I could do it," Meredith giggled, popping a caramel filled chocolate into her mouth.

"Fine," Derek said, grabbing a truffle one and biting into it. One taste and he was thankful that he'd sprung for the expensive imported stuff from Switzerland. Not that price mattered; Meredith enjoyed her chocolate, and he was more than happy to splurge on it for her. "This is really good."

"Hmm..." Meredith giggled as she went to straddle his lap. "It is. And I think I need to find a way to thank you for getting it for me," she whispered into his ear, gently tugging on his earlobe with her teeth.

Derek pulled her hair from her ponytail and ran his fingers through the waves of hair that fell around her shoulders. "I think so too," he agreed. Just as he was about to untie the drawstring to her scrub pants, Meredith's pager went off, thus ending the sex that was about to happen on the couch.

"Damn," Meredith sighed. She checked her pager and scrunched her nose. "Bailey. I have to go," she said regretfully, climbing off his lap. Of all days to get interrupted by a page, Valentine's Day wasn't exactly ideal. She reached for her coat and put it back on. "Thirteen hours into Valentine's Day and there's been no sex yet. That's just wrong."

"Later," Derek promised. He tilted her chin toward him and kissed her, enough to let her know that he fully planned to follow through on his promise.

"Later," she echoed. "Definitely."

Before she exited his office, she turned around and smiled coyly at her husband. "Bring the chocolate home."

Derek laughed. "I will."

--

As soon as Meredith entered the pit, she wished more than anything that she was back in Derek's office. Any holiday, even one dedicated to corny, romantic cards and overpriced chocolate seemed to draw a crowd at Seattle Grace. And Meredith always had a way of ending up in the thick of it all every time. She walked over to Dr. Bailey at the nurses' station and smiled at her former resident.

"You paged?"

"Yeah, curtain three needs a consult. Hailey Scott, five year old girl complaining of severe stomach pains," Bailey explained, searching in her stack for the correct chart, then handing it off to Meredith.

Meredith accepted the chart and nodded. "Okay." She walked over to where the little girl was, lying back in the bed with her mom next to her. "Hi, I'm Dr. Shepherd," Meredith greeted. "Are you Hailey?" she asked the little girl with a reassuring smile.

"Uh huh," the red haired five year old nodded, clutching her stomach, her knees curled up to her chest.

"Okay," she said. "When did your belly start to hurt?"

Hailey glanced over to her mother, who stepped in to speak for the shy child. "She told me she had a stomach ache this morning before school. But she didn't want to miss her Valentine's Day dance, so I let her go. An hour ago, the school nurse called and told me Hailey was throwing up and was running a fever, and suggested that I take her to the ER just to be safe. Is she...do you think she'll be okay?" Mrs. Scott asked worriedly as she combed her fingers through her daughter's hair.

"I want to run a few tests, but let's not worry until we have to, okay?" Meredith said calmly and comfortingly. "Hailey, could you roll onto your back for me so I can look at your belly?" she asked the girl.

Hailey reluctantly rolled onto her back and Meredith lifted her dress slightly to palpate the girl's abdomen. When she pressed her fingers over the lower right side, the girl flinched back in pain. "Is that where your belly hurts?" Meredith asked.

The little girl nodded, tears beginning to make their way down her face. Meredith could tell she was in a great deal of pain, and knew what she said next wouldn't make her visit any more pleasant. "Okay," Meredith said softly. She turned toward Mrs. Scott. "I'm suspecting appendicitis, but I need to draw some blood first to make sure."

"Okay," the girl's mother nodded.

Hailey shook her head, burying her face into the pillow. "I don't want to."

"I know," Meredith said sympathetically. "But I promise, it only hurts for a few seconds. And after that, we'll be able to give you some medicine to make your belly stop hurting, okay?"

After some convincing and consoling, Meredith was able to draw a blood sample and had it sent off to the lab for tests. Within a half hour, she went back to pick them up. As soon as she saw the high white blood cell count, she knew it was appendicitis. With any luck, Dr. Bailey would allow her to do the surgery by herself, like she'd done on New Year's eve. If there was anything good about working in the pit, it was first dibs on the traumas that rolled in.

She walked back into the ER and found Bailey finishing up on a consult. "Dr. Bailey," she called out.

"How's your patient?" she asked.

"I just got the labs back. Appendicitis," Meredith informed her. "She's in a lot of pain. I was going to give her a low dose of morphine while we wait for the OR."

Bailey nodded in approval. "Good. Book an OR and get her into a room. You're doing this one solo. You've done it before, you can do it again. I trust you," she said confidently.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"And if you're able to come back down here and stitch up the drunken fool in curtain four while you're waiting for the OR, I'll make sure you and Shepherd get out of here at a decent hour, my gift to you," Bailey said, grabbing another chart.

"Right away," Meredith said eagerly. She was willing to do almost anything to get herself and Derek at home, in bed, and naked as soon as possible. With Valentine's Day sex on the horizon, it was worth it.

After booking the OR, Meredith took Hailey up to a patient room, got her in a gown, and was now trying to get IV access, which was proving to be a difficult task. Five year olds and needles were never a pleasant mix. "This is going to make you feel better," Meredith said as she rubbed a an alcohol wipe over the girl's arm. "It's only going to hurt for a few seconds, okay?"

When the child bent her arm, resisting the IV, Meredith smiled at her. "You know, I had to get my appendix out a while ago. And I didn't want to get a needle either. But I felt so much better when I did. My belly ache went away," Meredith said, thinking back to her own morphine experience. Sure, she was higher than a kite and Derek still teased her about it occasionally, but she was pain free.

"Okay," Hailey finally consented, much to Meredith's relief. Gentle convincing was always a better route than anything else.

But her patience was quickly worn thin when she went back down to the pit to stitch up the guy in curtain four, who kept trying to hit on her, despite Meredith's blatant avoidance, not to mention the wedding ring on her finger.

"You're hot," Dan, the drunk man grinned, leaning back in the bed as Meredith examined his facial laceration.

"Thank you. Now hold still," she ordered. "So how'd you manage this one?" she asked as she irrigated the cut.

"Bar fight," Dan shrugged. "Some ass tossed a bottle at me."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "And I'm sure you did nothing to deserve it, right?"

"Hey," Derek greeted as he walked up next to her.

Her attention was momentarily pulled from her patient and she smiled. "Hey."

"Doc, tell her she's hot," the man said to Derek.

"She's my wife. I know she's hot," Derek smirked. "And as her husband, I'd appreciate if you would stop saying that."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled amusedly.

"Damn," Dan sighed. "Valentine's Day and you two are stuck here? That sucks."

Meredith injected the man's forehead with an anesthetic, hoping it would shut him up for a few minutes. "Yeah, it really does. Now hold still while I sew you up, or you might lose an eye," she said, and Derek laughed. When Meredith was cranky and unsexed, any patient that annoyed her suffered her wrath.

"Here, let me finish," Derek offered. "You have the appy soon. Go relax for a while before it starts."

"Really?"

Derek kissed her cheek and took the needle and sutures from her hand. "Part of my Valentine's Day gift," he chuckled.

"Dude, you're so getting laid tonight," Dan chimed in, a smile on his face.

Meredith pulled her gloves off and tossed them in the trash. "Yep, he is."

True to her word, Bailey made sure Meredith got to leave early with Derek. The appy was quick and successful, and after taking Hailey to post-op, Meredith met up with her husband in the lobby and they were out the doors by six, two hours before they were supposed to leave. Getting to leave early on any day was rare, especially a holiday. So, lack of sex aside, the day wasn't half bad.

--

"Holy crap," Meredith panted as she lay back in bed trying to catch her breath. Dinner had been eaten, a bottle of wine had been finished off, and now they were making up for all of the sex they should have been having all day. And it was quite the payoff.

"Yeah," Derek laughed, lying beside her as he, too, relaxed before round three began.

She looked over at her husband and smiled. "That totally made up for being interrupted this afternoon..."

Derek cupped her cheeks in his hands and kissed her. "Hmm," he hummed against her lips. "It did."

"I hated Valentine's Day before you came along. Now I kinda love it," Meredith giggled, rolling on top of him, her naked body pressed against his.

"Because of the chocolate and the lingerie and all the sex?" Derek asked teasingly as he ran his fingers over her back.

"Well, there's that..." she admitted. "But really because I never had anyone to appreciate it with. I never understood it, you know? But now I do and it's just...I don't know. I'm glad I get to celebrate it with you," Meredith said softly.

"Me too," Derek whispered, settling his warm hands down on her bottom, making Meredith gasp.

"Derek!"

He grinned at her innocently. "What?" he laughed.

"Feeling me up while I'm trying to have a warm, gooey moment with you," she said, her fingers tangled in his hair.

"Sorry," he apologized. "What were you saying?"

The feel of his naked body beneath her wasn't exactly making her train of thought coherent, so Meredith just smiled at him. "That I love you," she replied, her eyes sparking even in their dimly lit bedroom.

"I love you too."

Meredith raised up and sat up on top of him, grinding her hips into his. He could tell by the way she bit her lip and smiled at him that she was ready for round three. Valentine's Day or not, their insatiability was always there.

"Wanna go again?" Meredith asked coyly, already grabbing a condom as she waited for his answer.

Derek smiled back at her. "Always."

**Reviews make my day. Happy (almost) Thanksgiving! :)**


	65. Change of Plans

**Disclaimer: Not mine. I just wish it was.**

**There's a bit of a time jump in this chapter. Enjoy. ;)**

Springtime had arrived to Seattle, just like it did every year. The cold winter rain had been replaced with sunshine and warmth. But being a surgeon didn't leave much time to enjoy those things. Instead of picking flowers and basking in the sunshine, everyone was busy with work. Surgery after surgery was the norm, and though it was exhausting, they loved it.

In the midst of all of this, Izzie was still busy planning her own wedding, and like all good wedding parties, they bit their tongues and offered up opinions on things like wedding cake frosting and bridesmaids dresses and reception halls. Meredith, Cristina, Izzie, Alex and George sat at the lunch table for another round of wedding hell, as Cristina called it.

"I need you to tell me which one tastes the best," Izzie requested of them as she handed them each a small cake sample on paper dishes.

Meredith bit into the French vanilla cake with butter cream frosting and smiled. "This one is good."

"I like the chocolate," Cristina said. "No one ever does chocolate wedding cakes. You should do that," she shrugged as she highlighted something in a surgical textbook, barely focusing on the cake debate.

"This is sour," Alex grimaced. "Thanks for warning me that it's lemon, Iz," he laughed, spitting it into a napkin.

"This marble one tastes pretty good," George offered.

Izzie sighed. "Two '_goods_,' one _'sour_,' and one _'I like chocolate.' _Well, you're all oodles of help," she said jokingly.

"It's your wedding," Meredith addressed Alex and Izzie. "It doesn't matter what Cristina, George, and I like. It's up to you."

Alex forked a piece of Meredith's vanilla cake and chewed it contemplatively. "This one gets my vote, but cake is cake. Up to you, Iz."

Izzie sampled the cake slices in front of each of her friends, getting a true taste for each one before speaking. "It's between the French vanilla and the marble. I need to think about it," she said.

"You're not getting married until November. You have time," Meredith assured her.

"October," Izzie shook her head. "We were able to get the church we wanted on the tenth, so we moved it up."

"It's May...eighteenth, Iz. Five months away. Most couples don't have anything planned this far in advance. You'll pick a cake by then," George chuckled, sipping on his soda.

Meredith bit her lower lip, thinking back, mulling over what George had just said. "It's the eighteenth already?" she asked, checking the calendar on her Blackberry.

"Yeah. Why?" Alex asked, finishing off the last of the chocolate cake.

"Oh, uh, no reason," she shrugged as she got up from the table. "I just remembered I needed to go check on a patient."

George looked to Meredith. "Everything okay?"

Meredith nodded, grabbing her coat off the back of her chair. "Yeah, I'm fine."

After she walked through the cafeteria doors, the four of them glanced at each other curiously. "What's up with her?"

--

Meredith paced the hall outside of the OR, waiting for Derek to finish up his surgery. Minutes seemed to pass like hours as she walked back and forth, counting the tiles on the floor, staring at the pictures on the wall, doing anything she could to distract herself from the fact that Derek's surgery was taking a hell of a long time to finish. When he eventually walked out of the scrub room, she all but bumped right into him.

"Finally," she sighed, running her hands through her hair.

Derek noticed the frantic look in his wife's eyes; he pulled her into an empty hallway for privacy. He knew something was up, and didn't want others listening in. "What's the matter?"

"I'm late."

"What?" he asked confusedly.

"My period, Derek," she let out in a breath.

Derek placed his hand on the small of her back and lead them to the elevators. "Okay," he said calmly. "How late are you?"

"Well, I've been really stressed at work lately so I've been kind of off. Two days late one month, a day early the next. But it's the eighteenth, and I checked the calendar on my phone because that's where I keep track of it, and my last one was thirty-two days ago, which is...four days late. And I...it could just be stress, but I don't know," she rambled, rolling her watch around her wrist with her fingers.

Derek took her jittery hands in his own and squeezed them. "Okay. It's okay," he said, smiling slightly. "Let's just go upstairs."

"Okay," she nodded.

They stepped onto the elevator and the whole way up, Derek held her hand. He could tell how flustered she was, and he wanted to keep her calm. Holding her hand always seemed to help. As soon as they were in Derek's office, Meredith dropped down on the couch and he took a seat beside her.

"I don't feel nauseous or anything," she said. Meredith pressed her hands over her chest and shook her head. "My boobs aren't sore. No dizziness, nothing. And normally I would be, right?"

"Nothing besides your period being late?" he asked.

She shook her head. "And it's not even like we can count back to the last time we had sex, because we have sex almost every night, or every other night...more than once a night."

"We're always careful. Condoms aren't one hundred percent, but--"

"I know," Meredith whispered. "It's not that it's a bad thing if I am, but it's just...Der, I'm freaking out."

Derek chuckled a little, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Mer, it's okay. If you are, it's fine. And if you're not, that's okay too," he soothed, running his fingers over the back of her hand.

She looked to her husband and offered him the smallest of smiles. "Okay," Meredith exhaled.

"So do you want to take a test?" he asked.

"I guess so, yeah," Meredith agreed. "I uh...should we just take one from the clinic? I mean, it's a free clinic, right? So it would be free to just take one?"

Derek wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in for a hug. Somehow he knew she needed one. "Mer, just try to relax, okay? Whether it's now or a few months from now, there's going to be a baby one day. And if now is the time, then that's great. Let's just see what the test says first," he said as he kissed her cheek.

Meredith wiped off her sweaty palms on the knees of her scrub pants and nodded. "Okay."

"Alright, I'll go. Just wait here; I'll be back in a few." Derek smiled at her, gently squeezing her arm.

"Wait, how're you going to get it? A neurosurgeon looking around for a pregnancy test is kinda suspicious..." she pointed out.

"I'll be sneaky," he winked.

Meredith had no choice but to throw caution to the wind and hope he would go unnoticed. She really didn't have any other alternative. "Okay," she managed to giggle a little.

"I love you," Derek said as he opened the door to his office.

Meredith smiled at her husband. "I love you too."

She stretched out on the couch, propping one of the pillows behind her head. This was so _not_ what she thought she'd be doing today. Granted, as a surgeon, there was never a 'normal' day. But this was...unexpected. Scary. But still, she found herself slightly thrilled. Meredith placed her hand over her lower belly and let out a breath. _Most mothers had instinct about these things, right?_ she thought to herself. She didn't feel pregnant--not that she knew what that felt like. Or maybe she'd just inherited the crappy mom gene from her own mother. She really doubted Ellis acknowledged her daughter's presence, even at nine months pregnant with her, let alone when she was the size of a peanut.

Just as she started to doze off on the couch, hand still resting on her abdomen while she waited for Derek, the door to his office opened, followed by the clicking of the knob. "Got one," he said softly, walking over to Meredith.

"No one saw you, right?" Meredith asked, accepting the box when he handed it to her.

Derek shook his head. "Everyone was busy. I made a beeline for the supply shelf in the back and got in and out before anyone noticed," he said.

"We're thieves," Meredith scrunched her nose.

"Just a perk of working at a hospital," Derek chuckled, leaning against his desk.

She flipped the purple and white box around in her hands then looked to Derek. "So uh, I guess I'll go, um, pee on it?"

"Okay," he nodded.

"I'll just go and then bring it back here. There's a bathroom across the hall."

"Okay," Derek said softly. As Meredith passed by him to go to the door, he pulled her hand toward him and smiled at her. "Mer, breathe."

Meredith inhaled and exhaled dramatically, rolling her eyes playfully at him. "Just hope I'm calm enough to be able to pee."

Derek watched as the door closed behind her, leaving him alone in his office. He sat back on the couch and grabbed the pillow Meredith had been using. Like everything else, that too smelled like her, the scent of lavender that followed her around everywhere she went. It always calmed him. And right now, he needed to be calm because Meredith was freaking out. If he let himself freak out too, that wouldn't do either of them any good. So he just sat, breathing in the pillow, breathing in the aura of his wife.

When she walked back into the office a few minutes later, Meredith was clutching the test tightly in her hand. "How'd it go?" Derek asked her.

"I peed on it. Mission accomplished," Meredith sighed, kicking off her shoes then lying down on the couch, her head resting on Derek's lap.

"How long does it take?"

"Five minutes," she answered, staring up at him. "Der, what if it's positive?"

"I'll be overjoyed," Derek smiled, running his fingers through her hair.

Meredith couldn't suppress her own smile. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," he echoed. "We want babies. So if one happens sooner than we planned, then it's meant to be. It's no big deal," Derek said, always the eternal optimist.

"If I am, then I'll be six months pregnant at Iz and Alex's wedding," Meredith calculated. "That sucks."

Derek chuckled. "You'd look cute, waddling down the aisle," he said teasingly.

"I wouldn't be waddling at six months," Meredith giggled, gently smacking his chest with her fingers.

"We'd have a newborn by Valentine's Day," Derek said.

"Yeah," Meredith said softly, chewing on her lip. "Derek, I'm nervous."

When she scooted up into his lap, Derek wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. He could feel her pulse beating quickly when he kissed her neck. "I know," he whispered against her skin.

"You're not nervous," she said simply, staring down at the stick in her hands. Two minutes to go; two minutes until life as they knew it was forever changed, or two minutes until everything stayed the same.

"I'm married to the love of my life, who could have our baby inside her. What's to be nervous about?" Derek said, grinning sincerely.

Meredith looked to her husband, running her hand over his cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too," Derek whispered. "And I'm here. No matter what, I'm here. Forever."

"Me too," Meredith breathed, looking at the stick clutched tightly in her hands, then to her watch. "It's time." Slowly she pulled off the plastic tab to reveal the results, her heart pounding faster than it ever had in her life. The tiny blue negative sign staring back at her her filled her with an odd sense of disappointment, one she hadn't been expecting to feel moments before. "Negative," she said flatly, handing it to Derek.

"Oh," he said defeatedly. "Well, that's okay. Right?"

Meredith nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, yeah. It's...it's a good thing--not that I wouldn't have been happy, but..."

"I get it," Derek nodded, kissing above her ear. "Wasn't meant to happen yet. It will."

"Yeah," Meredith whispered as she smiled slightly at her husband.

He knew she was a little upset, no matter how much she tried to hide it. She was his wife, and there was little she could pull over on him. "Did you want to do a blood test to make sure? Pregnancy tests are only ninety-nine percent."

"My period might come today. We can do it tomorrow if it doesn't," Meredith said quietly, trying with all her might to keep her tears from coming to the surface.

"Meredith..."

"I have to be in surgery in twenty minutes. See you later, okay?" she said as she raised herself off his lap and quickly slipped her shoes back on. Before Derek could say anything else, she'd already left his office, leaving him in there alone with only her lingering scent and the negative pregnancy test in his hand. He knew Meredith needed time, but knowing that she was upset made it hard for him to sit there and do nothing.

Once they got home, he knew she would be more will willing to talk. The hospital wasn't the best setting for deep and meaningful conversations, not when pagers could go off at any minute and lives had to be saved. Derek ran a hand through his hair and slipped the pregnancy test into his briefcase. He couldn't bring himself to throw it out in the trashcan next to his desk. Even the custodians at Seattle Grace were gossipy, and word of the pregnancy test getting around the hospital wasn't exactly ideal.

Derek left his office a few minutes later, locking it behind him. Before he stepped onto the elevator, he'd wiped away his own tears and put on his strong face. Just because there wasn't a baby didn't mean that for a few seconds, the prospect of being a father didn't fill him with overwhelming joy. And he knew Meredith felt the same.

--

By the time Derek's shift finally ended, it felt like days had passed. Minutes trudged on, hours passed slowly, and he hadn't even seen Meredith since she left his office. And being paged for an emergency surgery right when he was about to go change didn't help either. Derek texted Meredith, telling her he'd meet her at home, not wanting her to have to wait around when he knew she wanted to leave as much as he did.

As he walked into the front door, Derek braced himself for what he might find. Meredith curled up into a ball on their bed was his first thought, or maybe even asleep. So when he found her sitting on the couch with a nearly whole chocolate cake on her lap, his curiosity was piqued. _Chocolate cake was better therapy than drowning sorrows with tequila_, he mused.

"Hey," Derek said, dropping down on the couch next to her.

Meredith looked over at him, her eyes only slightly red, but enough to let him know that she had been crying. "Hey," she whispered.

"Where'd the cake come from?" he asked humorously as Meredith put another forkful into her mouth.

"Izzie brought in wedding samples from the bakery. She left the chocolate one in my cubby with my name on the box. She knows me well," Meredith managed to giggle.

"Guess so," Derek chuckled.

Meredith set her fork down on the dish and let out a breath. "I'm sorry about earlier," she said almost shamefully. "I shouldn't have left like that. It's just--"

"Mer," Derek interrupted. "It's okay. I get it. We just needed some time. I understand that."

"Okay," Meredith sniffled as a new round of tears appeared in her eyes, which looked even more green than they usually did on account of her crying. "I um, I got it. My period. About an hour ago."

Derek kissed her temple and nodded. "That's good then, right? Now we know for sure."

"I...yeah," Meredith trailed off.

"Mer, what is it?" he asked gently, tucking some hair behind her ear.

"I really kinda wanted that test to be positive today," she said softly, offering him a hesitant smile as she awaited his response.

Derek could feel his heart pounding away in his ribcage and tears stinging his eyes. "Yeah?"

"I don't know, I mean...I was all panicky at first because that's big, you know? I mean, a baby is..." she breathed, running a hand through her hair. "All I could think about while I waited for you outside the OR today was how _not_ ready we are. I kept thinking about how I'd have to take time off and my fellowship would be put on hold and how you would have to take off, too. And how we'd both be crazy and exhausted but..." Meredith bit her lower lip as a small tear splashed down her cheek. "...then I realized how much I wanted that."

"You want to have a baby?" Derek whispered softly, wiping the tear away.

Meredith looked to her husband and nodded, laughing slightly as she sniffled. "Yeah, I think I do."

"Okay, then," Derek grinned, taking her hand in his own. "Let's have a baby."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked hopefully.

He cupped her face in his palms and kissed her, showing her just how serious he was. "Yes," he said against her lips. "I want to."

"You do?"

"I wanted it to be positive, too," Derek confessed, running his hands through her hair. "Either way, I was okay with it. But...God, I was so excited today when you told me," he chuckled.

"You were?" Meredith asked, her body wrapped in his arms as they sat on the couch.

"Yeah. I mean, I know we said we'd wait a year after we got married, because of work and schedules and stuff. But it's already May, so I say we go for it. We can do this, Meredith," Derek said with a smile that reached his eyes. "If you want to start trying, then so do I."

"I do."

"Alright then," Derek nodded enthusiastically. "We're doing it."

Meredith swore her heart might beat right out of her chest and she smiled widely at him. "So no more condoms then?" she giggled, brushing away the last of her tears with her thumb.

"Just us. And we won't stress out about it. When it happens, it happens. Let's just enjoy the baby making," Derek chuckled. "That's half the fun..."

"Okay," Meredith breathed. She refilled her previously forgotten wine glass on the coffee table and took a sip, then handed it to her husband. "We need to finish off the wine then. No more for me after today."

"None?" Derek asked amusedly as he took his own sip.

Meredith shook her head. "Nope._ I_ am a sacred vessel...or I will be."

"Did you just quote that movie?" Derek asked, laughing. "The one you made me watch last month?"

"_Juno_? Yes I did," Meredith nodded. "And I'm proud that you remembered that," she said, lifting the box of chocolate cake back onto her lap. "So no more alcohol after tonight. But cake, yes. Celebratory chocolate wedding cake. Only, I guess it's more like baby-making cake." She cut off a small piece with her fork and fed it to him, smiling the whole time. It was rare that they partook in such cheesiness, but tonight there was a reason to do so. Deciding to start adding to their family was something kind of huge.

Derek willingly accepted the cake and chuckled. "Wow, feeding me. You must be _really_ excited if you're feeding me."

"I _am_ excited," Meredith said, dropping the fork into the cake box so she could weave her fingers through his hair. "We're going to make a baby, Der," she whispered, her forehead resting against his.

She'd never seen more love and joy in his eyes when he looked at her. Before kissing her again, Derek smiled. "We are."

**Yep. ;)**


	66. Big Day

**Disclaimer: Nuh uh. Not mine.**

**Hey guys. So, I have 177 story alerts for this fic, and I normally only get 12 or so reviews. I'm extremely grateful to those awesome reviewers - you know who you are. But obviously, the lack of feedback is frustrating. So...in the spirit of the holidays, would you mind leaving a review? Pretty please? **

**Enjoy the update. I hope you like this one. :)**

Today was the day. Four years in the making, and today was the day Meredith and Derek were going to officially start "trying" for a baby. They decided to ditch the condoms and if it happened, it happened. There would be no stressing out if it didn't happen right away; baby-making had been pushed up a little on their schedule anyway, so for now, they would just enjoy the time spent trying to make a baby. That was half the adventure.

But their fun day was now being put off until night because Derek had gotten an emergency page this morning, and Meredith had to go to dress shopping with Izzie, along with Cristina. And with the added fun of Izzie's mother, this day was bound to drag on for quite some time. As she sat on the fancy red couch in the bridal boutique next to Cristina, Meredith found herself checking her watch constantly, counting down the minutes until it was just her, Derek, and their bed. And really, it couldn't come soon enough.

"So Isobel tells me you're married to a doctor. And based on that ring on your finger, he seems like quite the catch," Izzie's mother complimented while the three of them waited for Izzie to try on another dress.

Meredith giggled at her remark and subconsciously ran her fingers over her wedding ring. "Yeah. Derek. We've been married a little under a year. Feels like a lot longer than that though. We've known each other for a long time. Love of my life," she said purposefully cheekily, much to Cristina's disgust.

"Why don't you show her a picture, Mer?" Cristina smirked as she mindlessly flipped through a bridal magazine, not that she had any interest in the contents.

"Oh, do you have one? I'd love to see," Robbie asked excitedly.

"Oh. Yeah," Meredith nodded, pulling her phone out of her bag. She flipped it open and the background picture of her and Derek on their honeymoon lit up. "That's him," she said with a small smile.

"My goodness, he's gorgeous. And so are you, dear. You two are going to make some beautiful little babies," Ms. Stevens grinned.

Meredith's heart fluttered a little as she was again reminded of tonight._ Baby making. That's what was getting her through today. _"Oh. Thank you," she said softly.

"How's this?" Izzie asked as she emerged from behind the curtain, dressed from head to toe in white taffeta, the tenth or so dress she'd tried on so far, each more beautiful on her than the last.

"Oh, Iz," Meredith gasped, a smile coming over her face.

"Oh sweetheart, you look like a princess," Robbie all but cheered.

"What do you think, Cristina?" Izzie asked.

Cristina put on her best fake smile and nodded. "Pretty..."

Meredith and Izzie both rolled their eyes in unison. "At least pretend that you care," Izzie laughed.

"What? You look hot in all of them," Cristina pointed out.

"True," Meredith shrugged. "But this is my favorite. You look beautiful, Iz."

Izzie smiled, running her hands over the beaded front as she looked herself over in the mirror. "I think this is the one, mom."

"I think so too, Cricket," Robbie said, wiping tears from her eyes as she snapped a picture of her daughter. "I'm going to go call Jade after I send her a picture. She wanted to see you."

"Okay," Izzie laughed softly, shaking her head in amusement. "So you guys really like it?" she asked after her mom went outside to make her call.

"Yeah, I do," Meredith nodded. "Alex will too."

"He'll just be staring at your boobs the whole time," Cristina joked, setting the magazine down on the small table next to the couch. It was her and Meredith's turn now, and no matter how little either felt like trying on piles of assorted dresses, that just came with the duty.

"Alex doesn't stare at my boobs. He looks at my face," Izzie corrected, smirking at her friend. "Okay, I'm going to go get this fitted. Go pick out some dresses you two like. Think autumn colors."

"What are 'autumn colors?'" Cristina asked with air quotes, looking out over the endless racks of potential dresses.

Meredith checked her watch again and sighed. _Yeah, this really was going to take forever. _But still, she grinned and bared it. Izzie had been extremely helpful for her and Derek's wedding, and it was time to return the favor.

"Reds, yellows, browns," Izzie called out as she followed the seamstress.

"This sucks," Cristina groaned, walking with Meredith over to a rack of shiny brown dresses.

"Just...be nice," Meredith sighed. She pulled one off the rack and scrunched her nose. "Eww. Not this one."

When Meredith checked her watch for the millionth time, Cristina eyed her suspiciously. "What are you plotting?"

"What do you mean?" Meredith giggled, pulling another gown from the assortment.

"You're checking your watch every thirty seconds and you're all...giddy," Cristina said knowingly.

"I am not," she rebutted lamely. Cristina saw right through her and there wasn't much she could do to pull one over on her.

Cristina walked to the yellows, already giving up on the brown. "Someone's a liar..." she said in a sing-song voice.

"Fine," Meredith sighed. She looked around to make sure they had enough privacy before she spoke. "Derek and I...we decided to start...trying for a baby and I'm just--I'm excited," she confessed softly, running her fingers over a light yellow dress.

Cristina's eyes softened and Meredith swore she saw a smile struggling to break through on her friend's face. "You are?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "We are."

"What happened to July?"

"I dunno. It's almost June already. We just...we're ready," Meredith said simply.

"Well uh, congratulations, I guess," Cristina said sincerely. "I'm happy for you guys."

Meredith had expected mocking or at the very least, an eye roll. So her person's reaction took her a little by surprise. "You are?"

"Yes," she nodded. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I dunno. You and Derek were never really...close," Meredith said before quickly adding, "Not that you hate each other but--"

Cristina groaned. "If you ever tell him I said this, I'll deny it until the day I die. But he's...a decent guy. He's a good person, and he loves you. So, yeah. I'm happy for you two."

"Thank you, Cristina," Meredith said softly.

"So have you started yet or is tonight the first '_hurrah_?'" Cristina asked as they walked over to some burgundy dresses.

"Tonight is the first official night," Meredith said, feeling relieved that she could confide in her best friend. She and Derek hadn't talked about whether or not they were going to share the news with their friends, but this was Cristina. And Meredith knew she would keep it to herself. Having the moral support was nice. "I went to my OB/GYN a few days ago and she gave me prenatal vitamins and these pamphlets with huge pregnant bellies on them. My reproductive...whatever is healthy. And I got the all-clear, so yeah. Tonight. Which is why I would rather not spend all day in this bridal shop," Meredith rambled.

Cristina pursed her lips in approval and let a small smile cross her face. "Wow."

"What?"

"I don't know," she said rather blankly. "Should we hug or...?"

Meredith giggled, brushing some hair out of her face. "No, that's okay. Unless you want to."

"Maybe if we weren't standing in a wedding dress store," Cristina said. "But because we are..."

"Yeah, got it." Meredith laughed. She pulled a dress off the hanger and held it up to herself. "How's this?"

"Pretty," Cristina rolled her eyes.

Meredith put it back on the rack and sighed. "You're right. It sucks."

"Wait, so are you going to tell Iz? I mean, what if you get pregnant? Gonna squeeze the baby bump into...crimson satin?" Cristina asked, reading the tag on one of the gowns.

"_If_ it even happens that fast. It could take months. Besides, I wouldn't show that early," Meredith countered.

"Please. You and McDreamy had sex thirty times a week before you were even trying to get knocked up. Now it's going to be nonstop. I give it a month," Cristina said with a laugh, though Meredith knew she was being serious.

"Just...don't say anything to anyone. Not that I think you will but I just--"

"I won't." Cristina shook her head.

"Good."

Cristina nodded in concordance. "Alright, well, here," she said, grabbing a few burgundy dresses off the shelf and handing them to Meredith. "Let's make this quick then."

"What...what are you talking about?" Meredith said as she gathered up the shiny, satin fabric into her arms.

"It's a big day for you. So this is me, helping. Even if it means you get to go home and get laid all night long while I'm...not," she said with a sigh.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you."

"Yeah. You owe me sex details."

"Fine," Meredith giggled as they trudged toward the dressing rooms with a pile of dresses draped over each of their arms. Cristina really could be a good friend when she wanted to be. And on a day like this, she _really _appreciated it.

--

It was five o'clock before Meredith walked in the front door. She'd been out longer than she anticipated; between all of the dress shopping, and Izzie's mom's insistence on treating the three of them to a late lunch, it was a relief to finally be home. It had been a fun day, but nothing beat a night in with Derek, especially _this_ night.

"Derek?" Meredith called out, setting her bag down in the foyer and kicking off her shoes.

"In here," he called back from his office next to the would-be playroom for their would-be kids. As Meredith passed by it, her excitement level escalated a little more. Each second she grew more and more anxious to drag her husband upstairs and sex him until neither of them could walk.

Meredith stood in the doorway and smiled at him, watching as he filled out some paperwork for a pro-bono surgery he'd told her about yesterday. "Hey."

"Hey." Derek scrawled his signature on the form and set it atop the pile before turning his attention towards her. "Finally home," he chuckled. "How was it?"

"Uh...amusing," was all she could do to describe the day so far. Meredith walked into the room and seated herself on Derek's lap, his legs in between hers. "How was your day?"

"Oh, fun," he said dryly, giving her a smirk. "The only thing that got me through it was you."

"Me?" she giggled, running her fingers through his hair.

Derek wrapped his arms around her and pulled her towards him. "Mmhmm..." he murmured, his lips finding hers.

"I um...did you eat?" Meredith asked, already getting hot and bothered by the way her husband was kissing her.

"Yeah. You?"

Meredith ran her hands over his shoulders and nodded. "Yeah. Izzie, uh, her mom treated us to lunch. Not hungry."

The same thoughts seemed to be running through both of their minds because Derek easily picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Derek smiled widely at her as he walked towards the stairs. "Well, I guess we're ready to start then," he laughed.

Meredith mirrored the smile on his face and kissed him again, possibly hazardous as he ascended the staircase, but at the moment, it was difficult to care. When they reached their bedroom, Derek gently set her back on the bed and kissed her again, softer this time. She sighed contentedly against his lips. "I've been waiting all day."

"Me too," he whispered, reaching for the bottom of her shirt. She arched her back and he pulled it up over her head, tossing it onto the floor below.

While he removed his own shirt, Meredith managed to shimmy out of her jeans and panties, adding them to the discarded pile of clothes accumulating next to the bed. By the time she unhooked her bra, Derek was already naked above her, just as eager to get started as she was. "Normally now is when I would tell you to grab a condom," she giggled.

"No more condoms," he chuckled, cradling her head in his hands as he leaned down to kiss her again.

"Last time...with no condom...was the prom," Meredith said in between kisses.

"Hmm...and now we're married and trying for a baby," he said softly. "So much better now."

"It is," Meredith smiled. She slowly opened her legs for him and ran her fingers over his chest. "Make love to me, Derek," she whispered.

He saw his eyes reflected in her own as he pushed inside her and stilled. They were quiet besides their breathing and everything was perfect inside their room; nothing else mattered. Meredith stared up at her husband and smiled, tears pooled in her eyes. "Derek."

"Oh God, Mer," he sighed, resting his forehead against hers. She was bliss. The feel of her was enough to drive him over the edge right then, but he was determined to hold back. Slow and intimate, that's how they wanted it to be. Savoring every feeling until holding back wasn't possible.

Meredith clenched around him, holding him in place. "I love you," she murmured as she kissed him again, threading her fingers through his hair, holding onto him like an anchor to ground herself.

"I love you too." Derek wrapped his arms under her shoulders and hugged her to him. The need to touch every part of her overwhelmed him. To hold her and never let her go. Meredith pressed down on his back with the pads of her fingers, his signal to move. With each thrust, each time she arched her back and he moved inside of her, they were brought closer to that moment when they would fall over the edge together. He knew she was close when her breaths became short puffs of air against his face and her walls began pulsing around him. All he could do was keep moving within her, unable to stop her from her imminent peak. She looked too beautiful to force himself to slow down.

"Der. Derek. I'm..." Meredith gasped, her fingers locking on his curls. She looked up and met his eyes, encouraging him to let go. She was ready, and she knew he was too.

Derek released with a heaving sigh, thrusting deep once more as he felt her own orgasm consume her, her muscles spasming around him, milking him of all he had. After those long perfect seconds ended, Meredith eased his head down atop her breasts, letting them both rest as they came back to earth. "Meredith," he said almost reverently, kissing her breasts and raising his head to her clavicle and kissing her there, too.

Meredith felt him seeping inside her and she kissed her husband's forehead. "Derek." Her voice came out so quietly that she wondered if he heard her. He lifted his head to look at her, and noticed the tears in her eyes before she even knew they were there.

He wiped one away as it slipped from her eye and began racing to her ear. "I know," he whispered.

"Wow," she giggled through her tears.

"Yeah," Derek laughed too.

"We're really trying to have a baby," Meredith said, the wonder of it all rising to the surface as she lay in her husband's arms.

Derek smiled, pulling the blanket up over them as he finally slipped out of her. "That's what we just did," he said amusedly as he trailed his lips against her neck.

"Not to sound flip, but..." she began, still catching her breath. "No more condoms, ever again."

"So much better," Derek agreed, smiling against her skin.

"It was so much more..." Meredith said as she searched for the right words.

"Us," Derek offered. "It was just us." _Bliss._

"Perfect," she said after a few seconds, wiping away a few lingering tears before they could spill over her eyelids.

Derek grinned at Meredith, completely calm and happy and she smiled back. "Wanna go again?" he chuckled.

She answered by pulling her husband on top of her and biting her lip. "Yes," she giggled. "I do."

"Do you wanna...?" he asked, ready to switch positions with her if she wanted to do so.

Meredith shook her head. "Gravity, Derek. I have to keep your swimmers in there so they can do their job," she smirked.

Derek dropped his head to her shoulder and laughed audibly. "That's very...clinical of you to say."

"We're doctors," Meredith pointed out.

"And now we could be parents," Derek smiled, pressing a kiss to her lips as he nudged himself between her knees.

She closed her eyes in pleasure when she felt Derek against her, ready to make love to her for the second time that night. If this is what they'd be doing until the stick turned blue, Meredith was more than willing to enjoy the ride. She wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled back at him. "One day."


	67. You're My Person

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. I just wish I did.**

**Thanks so much for the reviews! I really do appreciate each and every one of them. I hope you guys keep reviewing and letting me know what you think. Also, this is the last update until January. I'll be in Florida over New Year's and won't be able to post anything until January 8th...ish. I just wanted to let you know. :)**

Meredith stared up at the ceiling, her breaths coming out in short little bursts of air. Her heart thudded inside her chest and her legs felt like Jell-O. This whole baby-making thing had its perks, and they were orgasmic and frequent. She was pretty sure her friends were probably looking for her, but right now, she was too blissed out to care. "Damn," she panted. "Good luck getting any productivity out of me today..."

"Good thing you're working with me then," Derek chuckled. He traced patterns on her stomach with his fingers, his left left leg draped over both of hers while their blood pressure returned to normal.

"I don't know if I'll be able to walk," she giggled. "I think my legs might be stuck like this for a while."

"Nothing wrong with that," Derek smirked as he kissed her cheek. "Easier access for me."

Meredith looked at him and scrunched her nose playfully. "Porny."

"Just the truth," he chuckled. Derek glanced over at the clock on his desk; his brain was telling him that they should get up and get back to work, but...another part of his body wanted to pull Meredith on top of him and go for round three.

As though she was reading his mind, Meredith gently patted his arm and sighed. "We should go. If we stay in here too much longer, everyone is gonna get suspicious."

"Yeah," Derek agreed regretfully. As much as he loved being a surgeon, sex with Meredith was always more appealing.

Meredith sat up and reached for her discarded clothes on the floor. "At least we have Cristina to cover for us," she laughed.

"The other day she--" Derek said before stopping himself. "I don't even want to repeat it."

"What?" Meredith giggled, fastening her bra.

Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "She asked me if my penis fell off yet from overuse. That was mortifying..."

"She's just teasing you," Meredith said. "Besides, I'd never sex you so much that your penis fell off. I love it too much."

"Thanks...I think," Derek chuckled. "I'm just glad she hasn't told anyone. Last thing we need is Mark finding out. Or Izzie. Then everyone would know..."

"She's loyal; she wouldn't spill," Meredith assured him. "Do you mind that I told her?"

Derek shook his head. "No, not at all. She's your person. It's good that you told her."

"You're sure?" Meredith asked as they folded the bed back into the couch together, then dropped the cushions back in place.

"Yeah," he nodded.

Meredith smiled at her husband as he pulled his coat on, back to looking like the charming brain surgeon he was. "You're my person too, you know."

"Hmm?"

"She's not my only person. You're my person too. I just wanted you to know that," Meredith said softly, smoothing her fingers through his hair that was still wild from their multiple rounds of sex.

Derek wrapped his arms around her waist and hugged her close to him. "You're mine, too," he said before pressing his lips to hers for their final kiss before venturing back out into the hospital world.

Meredith smiled at him. "I know."

--

"Having sex, were we?" Cristina asked knowingly when Meredith approached the nurses' station a few minutes later. Leave it to Cristina to come out and bluntly ask.

"Yes, I was, actually," Meredith admitted, grabbing a pen from her pocket and scribbling something in a chart. "Why? Did someone say something?"

Cristina shook her head and took a sip of her coffee. "One of your interns--uh, the pregnant red haired one--she asked me if I knew where you were, but I covered for you."

"Megan. Well, what did she need?" Meredith asked.

"Dunno. Something about a catheter. I haven't heard any emergency pages for decapitated penises yet, so I guess she figured it out," she shrugged.

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "About that, thanks for asking Derek if his fell off. Very kind," she said jokingly.

"What good is keeping a secret if you can't have a little fun with it?" Cristina pointed out.

"Be nice to him. Or at least, don't ask him about his penis. It creeps me out," Meredith cringed a little.

"His penis creeps you out?"

Meredith looked to her friend, exasperated. "No. You talking about it is creepy. And wrong," she corrected. "Believe me, his penis makes me very, very happy..."

"Okay, _now_ it's creepy," Cristina groaned. "Please don't elaborate."

"Someone's jealous," Meredith said in a sing-song voice.

"Of the gratuitous sexing? Yes. Of the morning sickness, swollen ankles, and baby coming out of my hoo-hoo as a result of all the sex? No," Cristina shook her head.

Meredith smiled at her friend. "You're telling me that when I get pregnant, all you're going to do is mock me?"

"I'll get the wheelchair when your water breaks in the OR. How's that?" Cristina compromised teasingly.

"Sounds great, thanks," Meredith said with a dry smirk. It was probably a good thing that Cristina wasn't her _only_ person.

--

"I have a new case. She was just admitted and put into a room. Want in?" Derek asked in a hurry as he walked toward the patient's room.

Meredith nodded eagerly and hopped up from her chair at the nurses' station where she'd been writing up post-op notes from her surgery earlier this morning with Derek. "Yeah." She closed the chart and caught up to her husband as he turned the corner. "What happened?"

"Dunno yet," Derek sighed. "Apparently, she's a six year old that hasn't stopped crying since she got in the door. Should be fun," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah," Meredith agreed equally sarcastically.

"Anna Drake, age six. She had a seizure while she was at summer camp and arrived by helicopter. Parents live in Arizona, and they're having trouble getting a flight into Seattle. She's pretty upset, so we couldn't get her relaxed enough for a CT. We brought her up here until she calms down," Olivia briefed them as they stood outside the patient's door.

"Thank you," Derek nodded, as she handed him the chart. "We'll see what we can do."

Derek held the door open for Meredith and walked in after her. The blonde six year old looked even smaller in the hospital bed, surrounded by her IV pole and various machines sitting idly at her bedside just in case she seized again. Meredith's heart went out to the girl, scared and alone in a place where no one should have to be. "Hi, Anna," she said softly. "I'm Meredith. And that's Derek," she pointed. "We're gonna help you, okay?"

"I wanna go home," the little girl whimpered. "I don't want surgery."

Meredith brushed the girl's wavy blonde hair away from her tear stained cheeks and smiled sympathetically. "Well, we won't know if you need surgery until we take some pictures. Can we do that?"

"Uh uh," Anna shook her head. "Not until mommy and daddy get here."

Derek watched as Meredith went in full mommying mode. It didn't matter that they didn't have kids yet; she always knew what to do. And that filled Derek with awe every time. "They'll be here. They're going to be here as soon as they can."

"I live far away from here. What if they don't come?" Anna asked as a few more tears spilled from her eyes.

Derek sat down on the other side of the bed and handed Anna a tissue from the box at her bedside. "They're your mommy and daddy. Of course they'll come," Derek assured her. "So you were at summer camp? What was that like?" he asked, trying to distract her.

Anna shrugged her shoulders and played with the sleeves of the hospital gown that dwarfed her tiny body. "It was fun," she offered. "Today I was playing soccer and then I fell over. I don't remember anything until I got here."

"Do you feel dizzy?" Derek asked, subtly taking notes and diagnosing at the same time.

"A little," Anna confessed. "And my head's been hurting all week."

Meredith knew that waiting even another minute could be dangerous. There were any number of things that could be wrong with the girl. Aneurysm, clot, lesion, tumor. The longer Anna went without treatment could be fatal. Meredith straightened up a little and smiled, trying her best to look excited. "How about we take you downstairs for some pictures, then if everything is okay, I'll go to the giftshop and buy some coloring books and we can color while we wait for mommy and daddy?"

The way she said that was enough to make Derek's heart beat faster, and hope even harder that the baby-making would pay off soon. Seeing Meredith react so well with kids she didn't even know only made him believe even more that she would make an incredible mother.

"Does it hurt?" Anna asked, her trusting blue eyes looking to Meredith for reassurance.

Meredith shook her head dramatically. "No. It doesn't hurt at all. It's just like lying on the beach and relaxing," she explained with a smile. "So what do you say? Do we have a deal?"

Anna nodded her head slowly. "'Kay."

"Okay." Meredith patted Anna's hand gently and smiled. She turned to Derek, noticing the unmistakable grin on his face, one that he used whenever he couldn't kiss her right then and there. "So Derek will take you downstairs while I go get the coloring books, okay?"

"Is he nice?" Anna asked, despite the fact that Derek was in the room, obviously within earshot of the conversation.

Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "He's nice, I promise. I like him a lot." She winked playfully at her husband and squeezed Anna's shoulder gently, letting her know she wasn't alone.

"You like me a lot, huh?" Derek asked as he wheeled Anna's gurney from the room towards the elevator.

"Eh, you're okay," Meredith shrugged, nudging his hip with hers. She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek before addressing Anna. "I'll see you in a few minutes, okay hun?"

Anna nodded, much more relaxed than she'd been only minutes before. All of Meredith's reassurance seemed to have worked. So while Derek took Anna down to get a CT, Meredith made her way to the gift shop on the first floor. The Seattle Grace gift shop was notorious for being overpriced, charging way too much for the good Swiss chocolate and shiny balloons. But in a pinch, it was nice to have it available.

She walked over to the rack of coloring books next to the trashy magazines and romance novels, her eyes scanning over the Spiderman and Cars for something girly. Hannah Montana, Disney princess, or something about the circus. Meredith shrugged and grabbed all three. Maybe Derek would like that one, if he decided to join the party and color with them. After grabbing the sixty-four pack of crayons, she paid for everything and went back upstairs to CT.

Derek was in the viewing room, his legs crossed at his ankles while waiting for the images to show up on the screen. "Is she okay?" Meredith asked, setting the plastic bag with her purchases down on the table.

"I dunno. She probably just got overheated; it's not that uncommon," Derek explained. "What'd you get?"

Meredith smiled. "Three coloring books and way too many crayons for one box. I got a circus one for you, in case you wanted to hang out and color with us."

"Circus? Nice," he chuckled. "How about you?"

"Oh, I either get the Hannah Montana or princess one. Lucky me," she said sarcastically.

"You're amazing with her, by the way," Derek complimented, kissing her temple. "Makes me glad I'm having kids with you."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and breathed him in. "Me too."

When the CT results appeared on the monitors, they both looked them over, scanning for anything that would require surgery. As soon as they spotted the abnormal spidering of blood vessels spreading through her temporal lobe, they sighed in unison. "Damn it," Derek whispered under his breath.

"AVM in her temporal lobe," Meredith pointed with her finger. "That's what caused the seizure and the headaches."

"Yeah," he said, zooming in on the image to get a closer look at what was going on inside Anna's brain.

"It's operable, right?"

Derek nodded. "It's operable. It's risky, but I think it's the safest option. With something like this, she's okay until she's not. There's just no way of knowing," he said regretfully. "Alright, let's get her out of there, see if we can contact the parents, then we'll get into the OR."

"Okay," Meredith agreed. She motioned for the tech to remove Anna from the CT machine then grabbed the bag of coloring books and crayons off the table. "She's gonna be upset."

"I know," Derek said. "We'll make it as easy as we can; no scary words or anything. It'll be fine."

"Hope so," Meredith whispered.

They walked into the hall, smiles plastered on both of their faces to keep Anna calm, not letting on like anything big or scary was happening. "Hey Anna," Meredith greeted, patting the top of the six year old's hand.

"Can we color now?" Anna asked when she noticed the bag Meredith was holding onto.

"Actually Anna, we noticed in your pictures that..." Derek started, trying to find an analogy to explain what was going on in simple, non-scary kid talk. "You know how sometimes when you color, you go outside the lines and things can get messy?"

Anna nodded. "Yeah."

"Well, in your pictures, there's some colors that went outside the lines, so Meredith and I have to fix it with some special...erasers," Derek said with an encouraging smile.

"Is it scary?" Anna asked nervously, playing with the hemmed ends of the hospital blanket draped over her.

Meredith sat on the edge of the gurney and tucked some blonde hair behind Anna's ear. "Nope. You can sleep through the whole thing. When you wake up, we can color."

"I'm scared," Anna said, tears filling her wide blue eyes to the brim. "I want my mom and dad," she whimpered.

"I know," Meredith said softly. "Mom and dad will be here soon, okay?"

"But I _need_ them," Anna insisted as her crying escalated and her cheeks turned red.

If she continued to get worked up, they knew her AVM could burst and she'd be dead in a matter of minutes. Derek looked to Meredith, searching her eyes for a plan of action to calm the girl down. As if on cue, Meredith pulled Anna into her lap and started rubbing her back. That's what Derek did for her when she was upset and it was all she could think of to comfort her. Anna wrapped her arms around Meredith's neck, resting her head on her shoulder. Tears seeped through Meredith's coat and she could feel the girl's breath on her neck.

"It's okay," Meredith soothed. "I know you need your mom and dad here. But for now, I can be your person, Anna. I'm here. Derek, too. We'll make sure that everything is okay. Can we do that?"

Anna nodded into Meredith's shoulder and sniffled. "Okay."

"Okay," Meredith whispered, brushing the hair out of the girl's face. "When you wake up, we can color. And mom and dad will be here before you know it."

"'Kay," Anna agreed. She looked up at Meredith and let a small smile come over her face.

Meredith smiled back at her. "Okay."

--

"What's next, Dr. Shepherd?" Derek asked as the two stood over the operating table, the part of her skull removed just above her left ear to expose the AVM in Anna's brain.

"We need to close off the arteries and veins that are feeding into the AVM," Meredith replied, suctioning the areas around the exposed vessels to get a better view of them.

Derek nodded and motioned for her to switch places with him. "Alright. Let's see it."

"Okay," Meredith said softly beneath her mask. It wasn't uncommon for Derek to let her take over the surgeries nowadays, but it was still exciting every time she got the chance. He trusted her with the responsibility and she knew that if she needed any help, he was always right there next to her. "I need several occluding clamps," she requested. "And constant suction."

"That's it," Derek nodded, looking on as she applied the clamps to the various spidering veins and arteries that were pumping blood into the AVM. She was just as precise and accurate as any world class surgeon would have been in her technique. Meredith looked to him with hopeful eyes. "Am I removing the AVM too?"

"If you want to, sure," Derek couldn't help but chuckle. "Now that everything is sealed off, I'll just suction around the AVM while you cut it out. Careful not to cut below the clamps," he instructed, watching closely as she repeated what he'd just said. Again, she was flawless. She cut away at the malformation and Derek suctioned around the area to clear away any small bleeds. Derek looked over their work and nodded. "Excellent work, Dr. Shepherd," he complimented.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you."

"Surgical field looks clear. No residual bleeding. Everything looks good," Derek decided, pulling off his surgical glasses. "Thank you, everybody. Dr. Warren, can you close?" he asked the neuro fellow, who nodded in agreement.

When he and Meredith stepped into the scrub room, they pulled off their scrub masks and tossed them into the trash. "That was...easy," she said, knitting her brows together. "Was it supposed to be that easy?"

"You're just gifted," Derek corrected, stepping on the water pedal and washing his hands. "And I say that with nothing but sincerity, you know."

"Mmhmm..." Meredith smirked. "Someone is just trying to get into my pants."

Derek laughed. "I mean it. It takes one hell of a surgeon to get in there and do that. You didn't even hesitate. You just did it. That's what makes a great surgeon, Mer."

"Thank you, Derek," she said softly, bumping her hip with his. "So how long do you think it'll be until she wakes up?"

"Few hours. It'll be better if she just sleeps off the anesthesia before we give her pain meds.," Derek said, grabbing a paper towel.

Meredith pulled her own paper towel from the dispenser and dried off her hands. "Do we have anything else scheduled for the day?"

"Nope, not unless something new comes in. Why?"

"I wanted to sleep for a few hours before she wakes up. I think I'll stay here with Anna tonight in case her parents aren't able to fly in until morning," Meredith shrugged. "I don't want her to be alone." When Derek's face broke out in a smile, she eyed him curiously. "What?"

"Our kids are going to be lucky, that's all," he said, kissing her temple. "Do you want me to stay, too?"

Meredith shook her head as they walked out of the scrub room. "Nah, that's okay. One of us should go home and see Charlie. He hasn't seen us much lately," she frowned.

"Are you sure? You can go and I can stay. No big deal," he shrugged.

"It's fine. I don't mind," Meredith insisted. "Are you gonna stay and color with us once she wakes up?"

Derek grinned amusedly at her. "Do you want me to?"

"Well, I bought you your own coloring book," she reminded him.

"Hmm...you did," he smiled. "Yeah, I'll stay."

"Okay," Meredith giggled, fixing her hair that had been trapped inside her scrub cap for a few hours. "So, um...since we're not going to be able to have sex tonight, should we have sex now before I get a nap in?" she asked, bouncing on the balls of her heels. "I think I'm fertile...or whatever."

Meredith winced at her own wording and Derek tried to suppress laughing, but couldn't help himself. "Yeah, we can do that while we wait," he chuckled.

"Calling myself fertile is a huge turnoff," Meredith groaned as they walked toward the elevator to go upstairs to Derek's office, which lately had only been used for the purpose of daily sex.

"It's good that you're keeping track," Derek pointed out. "Even if it creeps you out..."

"It makes sex sound so clinical. Like my egg is just chilling out, waiting for you to come along and fertilize it. See? Aren't you creeped out now?" Meredith giggled, stepping onto the elevator.

Derek pushed the button for the fifth floor. "A little, yeah," he admitted. "But it's always going to sound weird when you put it like that."

"From now on, let's just call it sex," Meredith said.

"We can't call it making love?" he asked with a smile, taking her hand when the elevators opened.

"Sometimes. If we're feeling romantic," Meredith teased. "But other times, I just need my husband to sex me."

Derek laughed. "Nothing wrong with that."

--

Meredith sat in the reclining chair next to Anna's bedside and watched as her chest moved up and down with each breath she took. She was three hours post surgery, still sleeping soundly, which was good. Little kids and post-operative pain were never a good mix, so any rest Anna could get was only going to help her. In the time while she and Derek waited, they managed to get in two rounds of sex in his office, and a nap together afterward.

Derek opened the sliding glass door of Anna's room and peeked in at his wife. "Not awake yet?"

"Nope," Meredith shook her head. "She's moving around a little more though. Probably going to wake up soon."

"Good," Derek smiled, pulling over a chair and sitting down next to Meredith. "I just got off the phone with her parents. They're flight lands at seven tomorrow morning."

Meredith ran her finger over Anna's small hand. "When I was nine, I tripped and fractured my ankle during gym class," she told Derek, keeping her voice low as to not disturb the little girl. "A nurse had to sit in the ER with me. My mom was upstairs in surgery and didn't even come down and see me because she was busy. She was so busy taking care of other people that her own child wasn't a priority."

"I'm sorry," Derek whispered, kissing her temple.

Meredith shrugged. "I just didn't want Anna to have to be alone. If her parents couldn't be here for her, then I wanted to be. I know I shouldn't get so involved, but I--"

"You've been there," Derek said softly, running his thumb over the back of her hand. "You've been in her position and you know what it's like. She needed a person today."

"Yeah. She did," Meredith said. Glancing out the door quickly, she made sure no one was wandering nearby before leaning in to kiss her husband. Maybe not the most professional thing to do while on duty, but she didn't care.

Just as she was about to run her fingers through his hair, they heard a small sigh from the six year old lying in bed. "Are you kissing?" Anna asked in a tired voice, smiling at the two of them.

Derek blushed embarrassedly and turned his head while Meredith just giggled. "We were," Meredith confessed. "Remember how I said I liked him a lot? Well, I kiss him sometimes too," she winked, standing up to take Anna's stats. "How are you feeling, sweetie? Does your head hurt?"

"No," Anna replied simply. "I'm just hungry."

Derek smiled at the girl. "Appetite. That's good. Do you like Jell-O? I could go get us some."

"Okay," Anna nodded.

"Are you getting me some, too?" Meredith asked.

"Sure," he chuckled. "Okay, I'll be right back." Derek patted Anna's shoulder then left the room to make a Jell-O run. Hardly on the resumé of a neurosurgeon, but as would-be father one day, it fit the mold perfectly.

"Are my mommy and daddy here?" Anna asked hopefully.

Meredith regretfully shook her head. "They'll be here first thing in the morning, I promise. I can stay here with you tonight, if you wanted me to..."

"Yeah," Anna said softly. "Can we still color?" the six year old asked, remembering their deal made hours ago.

"I've got the supplies right here." Meredith held up the plastic bag and smiled. Keeping kids alert and active after they woke up from surgery was always best, so she was glad Anna was up to the challenge. "Do you want the Hannah Montana, princess, or circus one?"

"Hmm..." Anna pondered for a moment. "Princess," she decided.

Meredith raised the bed up to a sitting position and pulled the bedside table over so it rested atop Anna's lap. "Should we give the Hannah Montana one to Derek? I think he would like that" she said amusedly.

"Uh huh," Anna said with a giggle as she reached for a pink crayon.

When Derek walked back into the room holding three cups of strawberry Jell-O along with three spoons, he smiled at the two. "Here we go," he said, setting them down on the table. When he noticed the only available coloring book sitting there, he smirked. "Is this one for me?"

Meredith looked to her husband and bit her lip. "We thought you would like that one the most."

"Mmhmm," Derek agreed sarcastically as he sat back down and flipped through it. "Oh, this is good," he said, the humor obvious in his voice. "I'm really earning my paycheck today." At this, Meredith shot an amused look at her him. Marathon sex, Jell-O, and coloring with his wife and their six year old patient, whose life they saved hours earlier. Never a dull day, really.

Anna took a spoonful of Jell-O into her mouth and glanced up at them. "Thank you," she said softly.

Derek grabbed a purple crayon from the huge box of crayons in the middle of the table. "For what, hun?"

"Doing what my mom and dad would do if they were here," the tiny six year old shrugged as she began to color in the princess coloring book.

Meredith looked to Anna, mature beyond her years, and smiled. "There's no where else we'd rather be than right here."

**As always, reviews make my day. And happy holidays! See you in 2010! :)**


	68. Blood Drive

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Happy 2010, everyone! :)**

It was blood drive day at Seattle Grace. A day when all the doctors rolled up their sleeves and braved the needle in an effort to save lives in more ways than just in the OR. And like all good doctors, Meredith and her friends stood in line, waiting to be blood-sucked. Mostly for the free cookies and juice, along with the required half hour of resting before returning to work. But still, saving lives was a good cause.

"I don't like needles..." George said, rocking back and forth on his heels as he surveyed the crowded clinic.

Meredith smiled sympathetically at her friend. "It only hurts for a second, then you won't even feel it," she downplayed. "I'll hold your hand."

George looked to her and cocked his head. "I'm not five," he reminded her. "But yeah, that'd be good."

"Pretty big turnout this year," Izzie commented, leaning against the wall.

"They better not run out of cookies," Alex said as he glanced at his watch. "This is taking forever..."

Cristina discreetly pulled Meredith aside to talk. "Mer, are you sure you want to donate? I mean, aren't you and Derek still on 'Project: Baby,'" she asked.

"I'm not pregnant," Meredith assured her. "And my doctor said it's safe to give blood while trying to conceive."

"Just making sure," Cristina nodded. "How's that going, by the way?"

Meredith looked to her friend strangely. It was unlike Cristina to ask personal questions, especially ones that involved her and Derek's sex life. "Good," she shrugged. "We've only been trying for a few weeks, but it's been fun."

"Ten orgasms a day sounds like fun to me," Cristina pointed out.

"Last night, I had three in a row. Three orgasms during a single round of sex. I swear, Derek has a magic p--" Meredith said before she was interrupted by a voice.

"Cristina Yang," one of the Red Cross nurses called out into the group of people waiting.

Cristina sighed audibly. "Never thought I'd say this, but saved by the nurse. Which is good, because I really didn't want to hear the end of that sentence," she joked, following the woman to one of the newly unoccupied gurneys.

Meredith just smiled and crossed her arms over her chest. "You're the one that asked," she called out.

"Of course she would get called first," Izzie said, annoyed.

"Maybe they go by blood type," George said. "She's A-positive. So I guess she'd go first."

"I'm AB. Is that after B? Or in between A and B?" Meredith asked as she checked her watch.

"I'm O. Which means I could be in here all day," Alex groaned, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his wrists.

Izzie rolled her eyes at him. "You're in the pit today. If I were you, I'd want to spend the whole day in here."

"Alex Karev," another nurse called, reading his name off her clipboard.

"Sweet," Alex sighed in relief as he pulled off his white coat and handed it to Izzie. "Are you coming with me?"

Izzie smiled at her fiancé. "You're such a baby," she said. "Come on."

"Hey," Lexie greeted, barely able to catch her breath as she finally made it to the clinic a half hour late. "Did they call me yet?"

Meredith shook her head and yawned. "Nope. It's like watching paint dry in here," she said. "Where were you?"

"Hunt's surgery ran long," Lexie explained. "Oh! Mer, what do you and Derek want for your anniversary? It's in two weeks and I have no idea what to get you."

"You guys don't have to get us anything. We're thinking about having a barbecue that weekend though--Friday, the tenth. Derek and I never had everybody over for an official house warming party or whatever. So if you could come to that, that would be great," Meredith said with a smile.

"You don't want...dip, or anything?" George asked.

Meredith giggled. "No, you don't need to make dip, George. Just come and have a good time."

"Okay then," Lexie smiled. "Looking forward to it."

"George O'Malley," another nurse requested from her place at the nurses' station.

George heaved out a sigh and groaned. "Oh God..."

"I'm coming back with you, George," Meredith insisted. "Wanna come? He could use the moral support," she told Lexie.

"Yeah. Sure," Lexie shrugged.

As the three began to follow the nurse to one of the curtains, Bailey entered the clinic doors and called them out. "You three," she said, halting their footsteps. They turned around and waited for whatever it was she had to say. "I need one of you over in the pit. Car accident coming in."

"I'm about to give blood, so..." George explained.

"And we were gonna go with him," Lexie said.

"You two stay, I'll go," Meredith offered.

Bailey nodded. "Alright, Meredith, come with me."

"Okay." Meredith patted George's shoulder and smiled. "Good luck, George."

"Thanks," George replied as he and Lexie continued making their way to where the nurse was waiting.

Meredith quickly caught up with Bailey and the two walked into the ER. "Did you give blood yet?" Bailey asked, helping Meredith tie her trauma gown.

Meredith shook her head. "No, not yet. It's okay; I'll just go back later on."

"Thank you for volunteering yourself, by the way," Bailey said.

"It's fine, I don't mind," she shrugged. Truthfully, she would have rather gotten the blood draw over with so she didn't have to go back and wait in line all over again, but she could be a team player.

The sirens of the ambulance pulling to the bay snapped them both into doctor mode, ready to take charge. Meredith and Bailey immediately ran over to it as it approached, waiting for the doors to open. An EMT flung the back of the ambulance open and started rattling off stats. At first glance, the woman on the stretcher didn't seem in need of emergent care, but when Meredith noticed her pregnant belly, she changed her mind. Pregnant women were always of the utmost importance in the ER.

"Allison Freemont, age thirty, twenty weeks pregnant, laceration and bruising on her forehead and a possible broken foot," the paramedic explained, wheeling the woman into the ER alongside her husband who was holding onto her hand.

"I'm fine," Allison insisted. "Just check on the baby. Please check on the baby," she said firmly, holding her hand protectively over her belly.

"We're going to check on your baby," Meredith assured her. "Sir, are you hurt?" she asked the woman's husband.

"No, I'm fine. Her side took the impact. They're gonna be okay, right?"

Meredith smiled sympathetically. "Mr. Freemont--"

"Kevin."

"Kevin," she amended. "We're going to take care of them, I promise."

"Trauma one," Bailey directed them. "Make sure you get an ultrasound. And page Shepherd to check for anything neural. Torres is around here somewhere; have her check her foot," she told Meredith.

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She turned back to the couple and kept on her assuring smile. "We're going to take you in here," she said, wheeling them into the first trauma room. "Can you page Dr. Shepherd?" Meredith asked one of the nurses standing by.

"I'm right here," Derek said, entering the room. "Hi, Dr. Shepherd," he greeted the two of them. "Mind if I take a look at your forehead after we take a look at your baby?"

Allison nodded. "That's fine," she said, sighing in relief when she noticed Meredith setting up the ultrasound machine. "We were actually on our way to the hospital. Imagine that," she shook her head. "Today's the day we find out if it's a boy or a girl."

Derek reclined the exam table flat so Meredith could do the ultrasound, smiling quickly at his wife. "Oh, that's exciting," he grinned.

"Would you like me to tell you, or do you want me to page your OB upstairs?" Meredith asked as she squeezed some of the blue gel onto the woman's abdomen.

"You can tell us," Allison nodded quickly. "Just--the baby's okay, right? We just want to make sure it's healthy."

Meredith turned on the monitor and ran the probe over her belly in search of a heartbeat. The _woosh-woosh _sound filled the room after a few seconds, putting them all at ease. "Heartbeat is strong," she smiled as she looked at her watch. "About a hundred twenty five beats bet minute, which is where it should be."

Both Allison and Kevin breathed a collective sigh of relief. "Good," she whispered, looking over at her husband, who kissed the top of her hand.

"Do you want me to tell you the sex?" Meredith asked again for confirmation.

"Please, yeah," Kevin nodded.

Meredith moved the probe a little to the right in search of the body part in question. "Definitely a boy," she said with a smile. "Congratulations."

"A boy?" Allison asked, her eyes glossing over with tears. "Kev, it's a boy," she whispered happily to her husband.

Kevin wiped a tear from her face and kissed her cheek. "Wow," he said in amazement. "That's his...?"

Meredith giggled a little, freezing the image on the screen and pointing to the referred part. "Yep, right here."

"And he's okay?" Allison asked, unable to take her eyes off her son's picture on the monitor.

"He's perfect," Meredith smiled. "Your OB upstairs will give you a lot of pictures, but would you like some now?"

"If you wouldn't mind, yeah," Allison nodded excitedly.

"Okay. While Dr. Shepherd checks out your forehead, I'll print these for you," Meredith said, wiping the gel off Allison's belly.

Derek stepped in and raised the table to a sitting position afterward and Kevin noticed the name on his coat. "You're both Dr. Shepherds. Is that some freaky coincidence or...?"

Derek laughed. "Nope, she's my wife," he admitted proudly as he examined Allison for possible brain injuries, checking her pupils and palpating her skull. "Okay, everything checks out. After you get stitched up and the orthopedic surgeon takes a look at your foot, I'd like to do an MRI just as a precaution, but from what I can tell, everything is fine, okay?" he explained.

"And so is your son," Meredith chimed in, handing them a strip of the crystal clear, 3-d images.

"Thank you," Allison said softly as she examined every detail of the ultrasound pictures. "It's incredible, you know. Seeing your baby from the inside. It's something you just never get tired of," she said, tracing her finger over the photo.

"I can't even imagine," Meredith smiled.

"No kids for you two yet?" Kevin asked them.

Derek scribbled his name on the chart and shook his head. "We're working on it," he said simply, winking over at his wife on the other side of the exam table.

"Well, that part is fun too," Allison pointed out.

Meredith laughed. "Yep, it is."

--

"So I told Lexie and George about the barbecue. Which means the whole hospital probably knows by now, especially if Izzie got wind of it," Meredith said when Derek met up with her in the lunch line in the cafeteria. "By the way, how were Allison's films?"

"Checked out clear," Derek nodded, grabbing a turkey sandwich and a bottle of water from the assortment of food and dropping it onto the tray next to Meredith's tuna salad and iced tea.

Meredith smiled in relief. "Good."

"You didn't give blood yet, right?" Derek asked as he paid for their lunch.

"No, I wanted to eat something first. One of Cristina's interns passed out because he didn't eat beforehand. I _cannot_ pass out on blood day," Meredith said firmly, but still smiling at him.

"I'll come with you. I didn't get a chance to go over yet either," Derek offered. "What kind of husband would I be if I didn't hold you hand?"

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "It's just giving blood; no big deal."

"Still."

"Fine," she giggled.

"So this barbecue...who's on the guest list?" Derek asked before taking a bite of his sandwich.

Meredith shrugged. "I guess just our group. So if you see Mark, tell him he can invite Bridget. If he's serious about her, I want her to know she's welcomed, you know?" Meredith said, drawing a forkful of tuna salad into her mouth.

"Okay," Derek agreed. "Next Friday, right?"

"Yeah, well, I figured we'd want the whole weekend to ourselves. Our first anniversary needs to be memorable," Meredith smirked.

"Aah, sex all weekend," he grinned. "Got it."

"And I thought maybe we could follow through on our plan. You know, outback on the blanket with moonlight and flowers and candy..." She bit her lip and smiled playfully at him.

Derek laughed. "And me, trying to feel you up?"

"Yes," she giggled. "Only there won't be much trying, because I'll just let you."

"Okay then. Sounds like a good weekend," he said smugly.

Meredith smiled. "I can't wait."

--

"Hey! Mark!" Derek called out to his friend.

Mark turned on his heel and looked to Derek curiously. "Hey. What's up?"

"Mer and I are having a barbecue next Friday night. We haven't had everyone over yet and it's been a year, so we figured it was about time," he joked. "You and Bridget are invited, if you wanted to come."

"Yeah, sounds good. I'll see if she's free," Mark said with a nod. "Thanks."

"How's that going, by the way?" Derek asked as the two walked through the crowded hallway toward the nurses' station.

Mark shrugged and ran his hand through his short hair. "Pretty good, I guess. I met the parents last weekend," he said, as though it were a foreign concept to him.

"Nice," Derek complimented. "Meeting the parents is always a good sign."

"I hope so," Mark sighed.

"She's good for you, Mark. Meredith made it a point to tell me to tell you that she's invited. She has good intuition about this stuff," Derek told him.

"And still, she married you," he teased, grinning at him.

Derek rolled his eyes. "I can just as easily un-invite you, you know," he warned, not that either of them was being serious.

"She asked me how I felt about kids," Mark disclosed. "Wasn't prepared for that one..."

"Why not?" Derek asked curiously. "It's a natural question."

"I guess. But no one's ever asked me that before. How do I know if I'm father material?" Mark asked rhetorically.

It was rare that Mark shared this much of his personal life with him, so Derek knew it was important. "Well, sometimes you don't even realize what you want until you meet the right person," he pointed out. "I mean, Mer never thought she'd have kids, or want kids. I'd kinda given up on it, too. But then...I don't know. Now we can't imagine _not_ having them. It's just one of those things, you know?"

"Yeah," Mark let out a breath. "It's different with her. She's the first one that ever made me think about it."

"Don't doubt yourself. If she's the one, she's the one. Simple as that," Derek said, patting Mark's shoulder. "With Mer, it took about half a second before I knew she was the love of my life."

"Yeah?"

"All I'm saying is, not everything is too good to be true, Mark. If she's the one, everything will work out," he said sincerely, thinking of his wife. All of the sadness and strife they went through was worth it. It got them to where they are today.

--

It was the end of their shifts when Meredith and Derek finally made it back over to the clinic. But at least now, it was emptier than it had been earlier. With the exception of a few nurses and patrons giving blood, it was actually kind of quiet, which was rare for the clinic. Meredith signed both of their names on the list and sat in the waiting room chairs for their turns. Luckily for them, it wasn't even five minutes until they were called.

"Meredith Shepherd," a blonde haired nurse named Marie said politely, holding a clip board in her hand.

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She patted Derek's thigh and they both stood up and followed the nurse to one of the empty beds. Meredith leaned back on it, and one cue, Derek took her right hand and squeezed it gently.

"Dr. Shepherd, are you having blood drawn too? There's an available station over there, if you'd like to get both done at once," the nurse offered kindly as she rubbed an alcohol wipe over the crook of Meredith's elbow.

Derek shook his head. "No, that's okay, I'll wait. I want to sit with my wife."

Meredith couldn't help but giggle slightly. "Don't mind him."

"What?" Derek chuckled. "I love you, that's all."

Though she claimed that she'd be okay by herself, she had to admit, it was actually nice to be able to hold her husband's hand. "I love you, too," she whispered.

"Okay, little pinch," Marie cautioned.

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand a little tighter at the slight pain in her arm and he squeezed right back. "You're lucky you get to go first," Derek smiled, pressing his lips to her temple.

"Hmm..." Meredith scrunched her nose, looking over at Derek instead of the needle and the blood. He was a lot more enjoyable to gaze at than that. "Okay, doesn't hurt anymore," she breathed.

"Good," Derek said softly as he gently ran his fingers up and down her other arm. "So I talked to Mark," he said, trying to get her mind off of the needle in her arm.

"Yeah?"

Derek nodded. "He met Bridget's parents last weekend."

Meredith's eyes widened slightly. "Wow."

"I know," Derek concurred. "I guess he's serious about her. You don't meet the parents if it's not long term, right?"

"Well, if you don't count _my_ parents, yeah," she joked. "I think if you met them before we were serious, you might have gone running for the hills."

Derek laughed. "Okay, first off, I fell in love with you the second I met you. Nothing, not even your parents, could ever send me running for the hills."

"Go ahead, lay it on thick," Meredith teased him.

He continued trailing his fingers over her arm, smiling when he noticed her skin prickling with goosebumps. "Just being honest," he said before kissing her cheek.

"Oh, almost forgot to tell you. Izzie is kinda turning this into a baby-making kickoff party, even though technically, we kicked off a few weeks ago..." Meredith said.

Derek eyed her curiously and resisted the urge to cringe. "What does that mean exactly?"

"Dunno..." Meredith sighed. "Hopefully nothing involving my uterus...or parts further south. I would have asked, but I was a little afraid to."

"Yeah, this could be creepy," he agreed.

"Maybe we'll get some gifts out of it," Meredith pointed out. "And Iz said she'd do all the baking."

"There's the silver lining," Derek said with a chuckle. He glanced over at the nurse walking toward them and smiled. "All done."

Meredith ran her palm over his cheek, grateful to have him there. "Thank you."

Marie put a cotton ball and bandaid on Meredith's arm then pointed to the nurses' station. "There's some orange juice and chocolate chip cookies over there; feel free to help yourself," she said kindly.

"I'll get you some. Just take my seat," Derek offered, always the annoyingly charming husband. Just another thing Meredith loved about him.

"Okay."

"Someone won the husband jackpot, huh?" Marie kidded as she set up for Derek's turn.

Meredith glanced over at Derek, watching as he gathered food for her. "Yeah, I guess I did," she giggled. "He's a good guy."

"Here you go," Derek said. He handed her a plate with four cookies and a carton of orange juice and smiled. "You okay? Not feeling woozy, right?"

"No, I'm fine," she assured him, taking a bite of the cookie.

Derek hopped up onto the gurney and presented the nurse with his left arm, ready to donate. Without thinking, Meredith reached for his right hand just as he'd done for her. When he smiled amusedly at her, she laughed. "You held my hand. I can't _not_ hold yours."

"Thank you," he replied. Meredith squeezed Derek's hand when the needle went in, even though he barely flinched. Stupid wifely instinct took over and she couldn't help herself.

"Both of you are AB positive, huh? It's rare enough to see five people a day with that blood type, let alone a husband and wife," Marie remarked as she reviewed the chart Meredith signed them in on.

Meredith took a sip of her orange juice then smiled. "Yep, just a weird coincidence."

"I like to look at it as fate," Derek smirked.

"I'm pretty sure alcohol brought us together, not our mutual blood type," Meredith teased him.

Derek laced his fingers through hers and raised them to his lips. "I'm glad we share a blood type. Who knows? Maybe our kids will inherit that."

"Maybe Izzie could make that a party game. Guess the future baby's blood type..." she giggled.

"Ooh, there you go," Derek chuckled. "I like that one."

Meredith sighed amusedly. "This barbecue is going to be one for the books."

"I imagine so, yeah."

**The next chapter will be the barbecue with all of them over at Mer and Derek's house. Hopefully it'll be a fun one. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	69. Barbecue

**Disclaimer: As you can tell by the disclaimer, I don't own it.**

**Thanks for the reviews! And sorry for the wait. School is back, so I don't have as much time to write. I really do appreciate your patience. :)**

The afternoon of the barbecue was here, and like any other event thrown by a surgeon, there was a lot of last minute work to get done. Derek scheduled all of his surgeries for early in the day, made sure Meredith was on his service, and by some stroke of luck, they managed to get out by three o'clock. And because Derek was a neurosurgeon with magic prestige, he could do that sort of thing and get away it. So by proxy, Meredith could too. Just one of the perks of being married to him.

Meredith was busy setting up the patio furniture when Derek walked outback. When he saw her, he shook his head and chuckled. "Mer, I'll do that. The table is heavy," he said, watching as she pushed it over inch by inch with her hips.

"I'm fine," she assured him, making sure he caught the eye roll she gave him. Ever since they started trying for a baby, he was super cautious about her doing any heavy lifting. If she didn't find it so annoying, it may have actually been charming.

"Still, let me help," Derek said. He easily pushed the table to the middle of the patio and Meredith began arranging the chairs around it. "You can go get a shower if you wanted to. I'll do the rest."

Meredith smiled and walked over to him. "If you're this bad now, I don't even want to know what you'll be like when I'm actually pregnant," she giggled, running her hands over his shoulders.

"Sacred vessel, remember?" he pointed out as he kissed her forehead.

"Right, which means you can't let me drink tonight. Even if I beg," she teased, not that she'd been desiring to drink anyway. She hadn't even thought of alcohol in weeks.

"I bought some sparkling apple cider for us. That way, we can at least pretend we're over twenty one, even though technically we are," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled. "You can drink, Der. Technically, I can too, but I just don't want to," she shook her head.

"Me either." She looked to him incredulously and he smirked. "What? I don't."

"Okay..." she said slowly.

"Hey, baby-making is a two person game. Gotta support my team," he grinned as he ran his fingers up and down her back.

Rather than tease him, Meredith just rested her head on his chest and breathed him in. Overly charming though he was, Derek was still a good teammate.

While Meredith showered and Derek put the beers and ice into the coolers, he couldn't stop smiling. This stage of life was one he thought he may never get to, but somehow, here he was. Married to the love his life, trying for a baby, and he and his wife were both surrounded by friends as close as family.

After taking the meat from the freezer, he heard Meredith call for him from upstairs in their bedroom. "Der, come here for a sec please?"

Derek quickly jogged up the steps to find Meredith wrapped in her bath towel, combing her wet hair with her fingers. "What's up?" he asked. "Everything okay?"

"Izzie texted me. She asked me if we need her and Alex to pick anything up from the store on their way over," Meredith said. She pulled a pair of panties from her drawer then dropped her towel, much to Derek's amusement.

"Well, I doubt I'll be able to think of anything now, seeing as every thought in my mind was just replaced with sex," he chuckled, watching as she pulled her panties up her legs where they settled low on her hips.

Meredith reached for her bra and giggled. "I don't mean for this to be a turn on," she pointed out. "I'm just trying to multi-task."

"Too late. I'm turned on," Derek grinned as he walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, still bereft of clothing.

When he started kissing her neck, Meredith moaned involuntarily. She couldn't resist it when he kissed her neck like that. "Der, seriously..."

"Seriously..."

"Do we need anything from the store?" she asked, her fingers ready to push the buttons on the phone. It was her way of keeping her mind somewhat focused despite the open-mouthed kisses her husband was dropping down her neck and onto her chest.

Derek scooped her up and dropped her down onto their bed gently. "No, we don't," he murmured.

"Didn't think so," Meredith sighed, texting a quick _no but thanks _to Izzie then dropping her phone next to her on the bed. If Derek wanted to sex her on their anniversary weekend, she would let him. Who cared if they were late to their own party?

--

They were able to get in some sex before their friends arrived, which would probably prove helpful in getting through the day. Not that they were dreading it or anything, but because Izzie had turned it into a pre-baby celebration, neither Meredith nor Derek knew what to expect. So getting in a mind blowing orgasm was good.

Everyone arrived within the hour, and much to their surprise and curiosity, their barbecue came with gifts, various packages wrapped in pinks and blues. What was in them, neither of them knew. But it was the thought that counted, or at least they hoped so.

Derek managed to hush the group for a few moments and smiled. "Before Cristina can roll her eyes at me," he smirked, glancing over to her as she took a sip of her beer. "...I just wanted to say thanks for coming today. Sorry we haven't had the chance to have you guys here sooner. But seeing as we're the only ones who understand what we do for a living, I hope you'll forgive us," he chuckled.

"So here's to..." Meredith started, trying to find something to toast to but coming up short.

"Starting your family," Izzie suggested, a smile radiating on her face as she held up her beer bottle.

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's waist and grinned. "Starting our family," he echoed.

"Cheers," Mark chimed in, followed by the rest of them.

"So what's on the agenda for this thing? Are we playing 'Guess the day McBaby gets conceived?'" Cristina asked sarcastically.

Meredith looked to Izzie and winced, hoping the answer was _no_. Honestly, she couldn't be too sure.

"Of course not," Izzie shook her head. "This is supposed to be a barbecue; it's not supposed to gross us all out."

"Then what are the presents for?" George asked as he popped a pretzel into his mouth.

"I don't even know what Iz bought, so if it's something creepy, don't blame me," Alex disclaimed.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "My gift is going to be helpful. If some of you find it odd, then that says more about you than it does about me," she said in her own defense.

"Oh God," Meredith whispered under her breath.

Derek chuckled and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Sounds fun," he said into her ear, so only she could hear him. She smiled, moving closer to him. He always saw the silver lining, even in a potentially horrifying situation.

"So who's hungry?" Derek asked in an attempt to steer the conversation in a new direction. "We've got hot dogs, burgers, steaks..."

"Cook it all. I'll help," Mark offered. "I happen to be a master griller," he boasted to Bridget, who was also in attendance.

She shook her head and smirked. "Mr. Wonderful."

"So what does Derek have planned this weekend?" Lexie asked excitedly, scooping some dip onto her chip.

Before Meredith could speak, Cristina kindly answered the question for her. "I'm guessing forty-eight hours of sweaty, hot sex," she laughed.

"Was she always like this?" Owen asked, amused by how candid Cristina was in her response.

Meredith shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much. And she's usually right," she admitted. "Actually, I don't know what Derek has planned. As long as there's food and sex, I'm good. I'm not really high maintenance when it comes to Derek wining and dining me."

"Speaking of that, are you not drinking?" Cristina asked, seeming surprised that Meredith Grey wasn't taking advantage of liquor at a social function.

"I'm trying for a baby, Cristina. Drinking is typically frowned upon," Meredith giggled, content to sip on her iced tea.

Izzie put her hand on her chest and gave Meredith a small smile. "I'm proud."

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Shut up."

"I mean it. You...look at you. You're all grown up and mommy-ish. I could cry," Izzie said, though it didn't sound at all like she was mocking--not that she really would cry. But still, Meredith knew her friend was being sincere.

"Thank you, Iz," she said softly. "That really does mean a lot to me."

Cristina groaned at the gooey moment. "It's like an estrogen fest out here. You sure you aren't pregnant, Mer?"

"No, I'm not," Meredith giggled. "You'll be the first to know, I promise."

"So how long have you guys lived here?" Bridget asked before she took a sip of beer.

Meredith smiled. "Since we got back from our honeymoon. It was done a few weeks before the wedding, but we wanted to save it for after we got married. We already felt like husband and wife long before we even said 'I do,' so it was kind of like something special," she explained with a shrug before she glanced over at Derek, who was laughing at something Mark said.

"Alex and I used to live with them at Mer's house. Now that they're gone, it's a lot quieter at night," Izzie teased.

Alex nodded in agreement. "It's nice not having to squint walking into a room, 'cause you never knew if they were doing each other on the counter top or something..."

"We were _not_ that bad," Meredith said in an attempt to defend herself, regardless of the fact that it was true.

"You kind of were," George chimed in playfully.

"Okay, Derek and I have a sex life. Now that we've established that, can we move on?" Meredith asked, smiling sweetly at her friends.

"You know we love you guys," Izzie said with a wave of her hand. "Which is why we're all here today to cheer you on."

Meredith shook her head amusedly and smiled. "No, we're here to eat. This isn't about Derek and me," she said.

Derek walked over to where they were seated, kissed the top of Meredith's head and sat down in the chair next to her. "Mark said he'd man the grill for a few minutes," he grinned. "So what are we talking about?"

"How you and Mer are worse than bunnies," Cristina informed him, taking another sip of her beer.

"Well, I'd say that'll work to our advantage now that we're trying for a baby, won't it Yang?" Derek countered, always ready to combat Cristina's quips with his own.

"Oh, that reminds me. Mer, I told the seamstress that we're going to hold off on fitting you for your bridesmaid's dress until three weeks before the wedding, just in case you do get pregnant by September. The dresses are form fitting so I didn't want it to be too tight in case you have a tiny bump by then," Izzie explained happily, which made Meredith laugh. Sometimes she swore her friend was more excited about the prospect of Meredith being pregnant than she was for her own wedding.

"Okay," Meredith giggled. "That's fine with me."

"Do you think it'll happen that fast?" Lexie asked. "I mean, not that I'm doubting you or anything. If anyone could do it, it's you two, but..."

Meredith shrugged and reached for Derek's hand. "We're not stressing out about it. When it happens, it happens."

"And the trying is fun," Derek winked at his wife. "Never get tired of that."

"Lucky bastard," Mark added with a grin as he walked back over to the group. "I need barbecue sauce. Should I rummage through your kitchen for it or do you wanna get it?" he asked.

"Top shelf on the right," Meredith said, pointing to the sliding glass doors leading to the kitchen. "There's cheese for the burgers in the middle drawer, too."

Mark nodded and set his beer on the table top. "Got it."

"Are you gonna help him?" Meredith asked once Mark was out of earshot.

"I plan to let him do all the work until he asks me for help," Derek chuckled as he leaned back in his chair. "He's capable with a grill. I trust him not to blow anything up."

"How long do you think it'll take for him to notice that you're slacking?" Owen asked.

Derek ran his hand through his hair and laughed. "Not long at all."

--

After dinner was consumed and they had eaten more than their fair share of barbecued food, they decided to move everything inside to the living room to be on the safe side. Summer nights in Seattle always came with a threat of sporadic rainstorms, so rather than be caught in the middle, moving inside was the wiser choice. So far, things weren't nearly as mortifying as Meredith thought they might be. Izzie hadn't mentioned her uterus yet, or made them blow out candles on a cake, which was good. But of course, that didn't last long.

"So when do you and the hubby want to start opening presents?" Izzie asked before biting into one of the pink frosted cupcakes she'd baked for the occasion.

"The hubby?" Meredith echoed, laughing. "I think I need to start calling him that from now on."

"Calling me what?" Derek asked as he walked back into the living room with some sparkling apple cider for him and Meredith, their non-alcoholic, celebratory beverage of the evening.

"My hubby," she said with a humorous smile, taking the glass from Derek when he sat back down next to her. "Kinda catchy and cute."

Derek mirrored her smile with one of his own. "Hubby. Very cute and cheesy. I like it," he teased.

"How fitting," Cristina smirked.

Meredith sighed amusedly at their constant back-and-forth and decided to step in before they continued. "We can open the gifts you guys brought now, though for the record, Derek and I just wanted to have everyone over for a barbecue. We didn't do it for gifts," she apologized, feeling slightly guilty that their friends felt as though they had to bring something with them.

"We only brought gifts because we care. You two give the rest of us hope, so if that means throwing you a party to celebrate you guys adding to your family, we're gonna do it," Izzie explained, smiling at them. "And if you think we're bad now, just wait until your baby shower. And your kids' birthday parties. This is just the tip of the iceberg," she warned.

Meredith laughed. "Thanks, you guys. Derek and I, we really do appreciate it."

"This pink one is from Alex and me," Izzie said, handing Meredith a large pink gift bag.

"I don't know what's in there, so don't blame me if it's creepy," Alex added as he ate a handful of chips.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "It's not creepy."

Meredith braced herself for what she would find when she opened the bag. Izzie's helpful gift possibilities were endless, and came with a chance of being mortifying. When she felt something fuzzy touch her fingers, she pulled it from the bag and smiled. "Izzie..." Meredith said softly, doing her best to keep the tears at bay.

"I know, I know. There's no baby yet, but I wanted to get a jump start on clothes. So I figured I'd start small," Izzie said.

Derek smiled when he saw the tiny pair of yellow baby booties in Meredith's hands. "These are adorable, Izzie. Thank you."

"There's more," Izzie prompted.

Meredith handed the booties over to Derek and reached into the bag for the next gift. When she pulled a book from it, she swallowed hard as she read the title. "The Conception Chronicles: The Uncensored Truth About Sex, Love and Marriage When You're Trying to Get Pregnant," she read out loud, much to the amusement of the rest of the group.

"Nice," Mark grinned.

"I flipped through it at the book store. There's tons of great advice for couples trying to conceive. You know, info. about prime time for conception, stuff about your uterus. Oh, and there's tons of sex tips too, which I thought was right up your alley," Izzie laughed.

There it was. Mention of Meredith's uterus.

Meredith could feel the heat rushing to her cheeks as she paged through the book, getting a glimpse at the chapters and illustrations within it. But despite the obvious horror, she knew Izzie had given it to them with the best intentions in mind, and that she and Derek would definitely be reading the sex position chapter before the rest of it. "Thank you, Iz. This looks great," she nodded enthusiastically.

"Okay, the booties are from both of us," Alex amended. "The sex book? Just her."

Meredith giggled as she set the book back in the bag and Izzie sighed audibly. "Okay, people, it's _not_ a sex book."

"I think it's great, Iz," Meredith said, stepping in to defend her friend. "So the rest of you can just keep quiet," she joked.

"Thank you," Izzie smiled.

"Open that one next," Mark said. He pointed to the large gift basket sitting on the table, complete with curled ribbon at the top.

Derek looked to Mark strangely. Mark Sloan could barely put a card in an envelope, much less make up a gift basket, so he knew it had to be something memorable. "Hmm...looks good," Derek chuckled as Meredith plopped it down on her lap.

"For the record, that one wrapped in the green paper over there is from me. I didn't want to be a part of what he got you," Bridget disclaimed before Meredith could open it.

"Oh Lord..." Derek sighed, running his hand through his hair. "Now I'm scared."

Once again, Meredith braced herself as she slowly untied the ribbon and peeled down the wrapping paper surrounding the basket. She pulled the small card from the handle and read it out loud. "The Aphrodisiac Gift Basket, complete with everything you need to make those nights of passion even steamier."

Cristina nearly choked on her beer at the description and Izzie nodded. "See, his is porny. Mine wasn't."

"What's in there?" George asked curiously, unsure if he even wanted to know.

"I ordered it online. There's melting chocolate, candles, massage oils, a recipe book, and a few other...items," Mark said with a raise of his eyebrows. "Items I won't mention in present company."

Derek examined the contents of the basket, promptly looking at Mark when he noticed a purple object inside. "Oh my God, is that a vibrator?" he asked in disbelief.

"Maybe," Mark said vaguely. Meredith looked at him open-mouthed, unable to think of anything to say, which only increased the grin on Mark's face. "What? I can't buy a sex toy for my BFFs?"

"Oh God," Meredith groaned, running her hands over her face to hide her embarrassment.

"That's why it's not from me," Bridget said with a shake of her head.

Mark continued to smile, despite Meredith's mortification. "Oh, relax. It's a good gift. Hours and hours worth of fun in that basket."

"Thanks, Mark," Derek conceded. "Very kind. Weird, but kind."

"My pleasure," Mark nodded. "Well, actually, yours..."

"Okay, next one," Meredith said quickly, eager to move the conversation away from her and Derek's sex life. She grabbed a polka dot bag off the table and read the card attached to the string handle. "We hope this comes eventually comes in handy. Happy anniversary. Love, Lexie and George."

Meredith removed yet another book from the orange tissue paper and smiled when she saw the title. "Pregnancy Week By Week," she read. "One of my patients a few weeks ago had this. I wanted to get one for us too."

"My mom got a copy for Molly when she was pregnant, so I thought you guys might like one. It's from both of us," Lexie said kindly, pointing to herself and George.

Derek grinned in appreciation. "This is great. Thanks, guys."

"No problem," George replied. "Glad you like it."

Cristina handed Meredith Bridget's gift, something square and wrapped in light green, undoubtedly another book. "I attached the receipt, in case you wanted to exchange it," Bridget said almost nervously.

Meredith waved off her hesitation. "I'm sure we'll love it," she assured her as she peeled off the paper. "A baby name book," she said softly. She never thought gifts could make her all sappy and emotional, but she found herself on the verge of tears after all of the nice things their friends had gotten for them. "I love it," Meredith said, running her fingers over the cover. "Thank you."

"I know it's early still, seeing as there's no baby to name yet, but it's still fun to think about it," Bridget shrugged. "And I really didn't want to be in on Mark's sex basket..." she giggled.

"Hey, my gift provides hours and hours of fun between the sheets. Perfect gift for these two," Mark grinned in defense of himself.

Meredith just sighed in amusement. Her sexcapades with Derek were common knowledge to the group, so if Mark wanted to elaborate, she decided to throw caution to the wind and let him. "Yeah. Can't wait," she smirked.

Just Cristina and Owen's blue gift bag remained sitting on the table, and Cristina handed it to her. "Enjoy," she said before Meredith even had a chance to open it. "They're stolen...ish."

"You stole something?" Owen asked her in shock. "I don't know what's in there. All she told me was that it's practical. If I had known, I would have checked the bag beforehand," he laughed.

"Well, technically, it was free," Cristina amended as Meredith pulled pregnancy test upon pregnancy test from the shiny blue bag.

"Where did you get all of these?" Meredith giggled, setting the pile of boxes on her lap.

Cristina avoided Izzie's gaze when she spoke. "Clinic."

"You stole these from my clinic?" Izzie gasped.

"If patients get them for free, I figured I could help myself to a stack. Besides, the hospital pays for that stuff," Cristina said simply.

"Cristina!" Izzie scolded.

"Keep your panties on, Dr. Drew. I didn't know what else to get them, and I wasn't about to go buy them a sex book..."

Izzie only laughed and shook her head. "Okay, when they find out they're having a baby much sooner than they expected, you can all thank me."

"We'll do that," Derek teased.

Despite the occasional horrors of receiving well-intentioned sex books and vibrators, it was a good day.

--

After the party had ended and everyone went home for the night, Meredith and Derek finally found themselves alone for the next forty-eight hours, giving them plenty of time to celebrate their anniversary, most of which would probably be spent naked.

Meredith sat on their bed waiting for Derek to get out of the shower, surrounded with all of the gifts they had received. She'd already paged through the baby name book, the week by week pregnancy book, and was onto the conception book Izzie got for them. And even Mark's 'sex basket' would come in handy later on that night.

"You were right," Derek said as he entered their bedroom wearing only his boxers, a sight that always made Meredith want to sex him right then and there.

Meredith looked up from her book and bit her lip. "What?"

"Izzie managed to work your uterus into a conversation," he chuckled, sitting down on the bed next to her.

"Told you she would," Meredith giggled.

When Derek noticed the yellow baby booties clutched tightly in her hand, he pressed a kiss to her temple and smiled against her skin. "Those are my favorite gift."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and sighed. "Our baby is gonna wear these, Derek. On her teeny, tiny little feet," she whispered.

"Her?" he asked amusedly.

"Or his. I don't know. I guess you've convinced me that we're having daughters," Meredith said as she felt the moisture build in her eyes. "It doesn't matter though. As long as we have a healthy baby...you know, once we make one," she giggled through her tears.

"We will," Derek assured her. "Now that we've got a library of books on how to do it, how can we not?" he laughed.

"True," Meredith agreed. She ran her fingers over the knitted material of the booties in her hand and let out a sigh of contentment. "These booties mean more to me than any other gift--I mean, I'm grateful for everything they gave us, but these..." she said, wiping away her tears with the side of her hand. "...these are our future, Derek."

"Babies and booties and being called mommy and daddy?" he said softly.

Meredith placed her palm over his cheek and smiled at her husband. "Yeah."

"There's no one else I'd rather do any of it with than you," Derek whispered. He pulled her onto his lap and she wrapped her legs around his waist. "I love you."

She leaned in and kissed him with everything she had then. The kickoff to their anniversary weekend was officially upon them. "I love you too."

--

**Fun anniversary weekend up next. ;)**

**Also, for those interested, I wrote a post 6.12 one shot. Just go to my FF profile for the link. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Reviews make me happy! :)**


	70. One Year Anniversary

**Disclaimer: I wish, but it's not mine.**

**This is the anniversary chapter, so there's some requisite MerDer sex found within it. Enjoy. ;)**

Twenty-four hours into their anniversary, and most of it had been spent naked. There was no better way to celebrate, really. It was a little before ten when Derek woke up to Meredith making little noises in her sleep, batting at her nose. He rolled over and smiled at her. She still made fun of him for watching her while she slept, but he'd suffer the consequences. She was too cute not to watch. Derek pulled the blanket up over her naked body to keep her warm. It was the middle of summer, but the air conditioned house kept things cool.

"I love you," he whispered into her hair, quiet enough that she wouldn't wake up.

Instead, she just flung her arm across his chest and let out a tiny snore, one that made Derek chuckle a little. She looked so relaxed and peaceful. He always loved getting the chance to watch her sleep in the morning, that lazy time spent after waking up but not quite ready to get up out of bed. When Meredith eventually woke up a little while later, she cracked her eyes open and smiled at her husband. "Hmm...morning."

Derek brushed her hair off her forehead and kissed her. "Morning."

"How long have you been watching me sleep?" Meredith asked with a tired giggle.

"I dunno...half hour?" he admitted.

"Do really enjoy watching me sleep that much?" she asked, toying with the small hairs on his chest.

"I do," Derek said softly before kissing her again. "Speaking of 'I do'...happy anniversary."

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Happy anniversary."

"I can't believe it's been a year already," Derek said, wondering where the past three hundred and sixty-five days went so quickly.

"A happy year..." she added. Meredith rolled on top of him, letting the blanket pool around her waist and giving Derek a view of her nakedness. "And I think we need to start the day how we started everything..."

Derek kissed her neck when she leaned down and threaded her fingers through his hair. "Hmm...sex."

Meredith rocked her hips back and forth and bit her lip to tease him. It was always fun to tease him before sex, knowing she could and that he wouldn't stop her. "Now?"

"Yes...please," he groaned as he cupped her breasts in his hands and rolled her nipples between his fingers.

Meredith moaned audibly at the zing that she felt go through her. "I think we should do number eighteen," she managed to get out before her head got even cloudier.

"What?"

"From the book Izzie got us. Number eighteen. The twist and shout thing," Meredith said.

"Porny," Derek grinned, gently balancing his hands on her hips.

She eased down onto him and threw her head back in bliss. "It's our anniversary," she panted, already getting caught up in the feeling of making love to her husband. "We're allowed to be porny..."

--

When they finally left the bedroom after three rounds of morning sex, and some fun in the shower, Meredith decided she was hungry and wanted breakfast. And because letting her loose with a frying pan was probably a safety risk, Derek was commissioned to make it for her. As Meredith sat on the kitchen stool in her camisole and shorts, she smiled at him.

"So..." she began.

Derek looked up from the eggs frying on the stove. "Hmm?"

"I say we make use of of Mark's basket tonight. You know, the massage oils and the chocolate," Meredith said as she popped a few blueberries into her mouth.

"Sounds like fun," Derek smirked, adding some cheese over the eggs.

"Maybe Mark knows us better than I thought," she giggled.

Derek leaned over the island and kissed her. "Hmm...maybe."

"Izzie's book came in handy last night...and this morning," Meredith said with a coy smile. However embarrassing it was to receive the 'sex book' at the party, she had to admit, it had positions in there that they'd never even dreamed of before, ones that had been keeping them busy for the past day and a half. "You know, last night when you were in the shower and I was waiting for you, I actually looked at the other chapters too."

"Yeah? Anything good?"

Meredith took a sip of her orange juice and nodded. "Well, apparently, missionary is the best for trying to conceive, which we already knew. But the book says I should lay with my butt propped up on a pillow for thirty minutes afterward so the...well, you know how it works," she giggled.

"Pretty sure, yeah," Derek winked. He handed her a plate of eggs, pancakes, and bacon then joined her on the other side of the island with his own dish. "So what else did it say?"

"The basics...getting off birth control, which I wasn't on to begin with; taking prenatal vitamins, which I've been doing for over a month. Uh...that I should lay off on caffeine. Which, let's face it, isn't gonna happen cold turkey. But on days off, I'm not drinking coffee, hence the orange juice," she sighed, holding up her glass. "You know, it's kind of unfair. All you have to do is sex me every day while I'm..." Meredith cringed. "Ovulating. But me? I need to hand over my free will..." she giggled.

"Yes, but..." Derek countered in an attempt to put a positive spin on it. "You still get sex. And me, waiting on you hand and foot. That counts for something, right?"

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Ass."

"What?" he chuckled, taking a bite of his pancakes.

"Always finding the silver lining," she said before biting into a piece of bacon.

Derek pressed a kiss to her temple. "It's my job. I do it for you."

"Yeah, I know," Meredith sighed amusedly. "And I appreciate it."

When he walked over to the counter, dumped out his mug of coffee and replaced it with his own glass of orange juice, Meredith smiled at her husband. "What're you doing?"

"Being a team player. If you don't get weekend coffee, I don't get weekend coffee," Derek shrugged.

"Yeah?"

Derek nodded and dropped a kiss on her cheek. "Yeah."

"Thank you," she said.

"Well, what kind of husband would I be if I sat here and drank coffee in front of you when you've cut yourself off from it?" he asked with a chuckle.

"A sucky one," Meredith teased, taking a bite of her blueberry pancakes drowned in maple syrup.

"Exactly," Derek laughed. "So what did you want to do today? You know, before our backyard sex..."

Meredith chewed on her pancakes and thought it over for a minute. When she came up with something, she smiled. "Oh, I know!"

"What?"

"We haven't gone fishing yet. And I bought us all that stuff for Christmas. It's July," Meredith pointed out, giggling. "I think it's time we used it all."

"But you're...an indoor girl," Derek said, hoping it didn't sound like he was mocking her. But it was the truth: Meredith and nature? They didn't exactly go hand in hand.

She scoffed, nudging his arm lightly with her fist. "Excuse me, I jog...sometimes," Meredith paused. "Fine, I used to jog. But that's not the point. You love fishing, and I love you, so I think we should go fishing."

Derek smiled at the adorable ramble and relented. "Okay, okay. Let's go fishing," he chuckled. "Just making sure you're up for it."

"It'll be fun. You know, as long as I don't have to touch anything. Fish kinda gross me out," she admitted.

"Good thing we're going fishing then," Derek winked at her.

Maybe an unconventional activity for an anniversary, but then again, they weren't really fans of convention to begin with.

--

That afternoon, after they'd packed a cooler of food and drinks, lathered on the sunscreen, and gathered up all the fishing gear from the basement, the two of them along with Charlie made the trek out to the dock overlooking the water, only a few minutes' hike from the house.

As Charlie ran a little ahead of them, soaking in the opportunity to explore the land, Meredith grabbed hold of Derek's hand. "I love living out here," she said softly.

"Me too," Derek said, kissing her temple. "It's calm, peaceful. Growing up in a house with five women...not very calm or peaceful. I enjoy quiet," he chuckled.

"Not sure how quiet it'll be when our yet-to-be-made baby is crying in the middle of the night," she laughed.

Though, really, there was nothing more they wanted than that.

Derek wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. "Well, that'll be our baby, so I won't mind."

"Good," Meredith said, raising herself up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

When they reached the dock, Derek set the equipment down then took a seat near the edge, just far enough that his feet grazed the surface of the blue water beneath him. Meredith pulled her hair back into a ponytail and tossed her flip flops off to the side before taking a seat next to him. Even if she didn't catch any fish, she was still going to enjoy soaking up some sun, though the SPF 50 she was wearing would make any kind of color highly unlikely.

While she rummaged through the cooler for a bottle of water, Derek pulled a fishing vest from the bag and proceeded to put it on. Meredith couldn't suppress her smirk as she watched him. Behind all of that hotness, there was a dorky charm that she loved about him. "Please don't tell me there's a vest for me in there," she said, wincing as she awaited his response.

"No. I didn't think you'd want one," Derek replied. "Why? Do you? You could wear this one..."

Meredith quickly shook her head. "No, uh...I'm good."

"You sure? You'd look cute…" he grinned smugly.

"Oh sure, so you could blackmail me," Meredith teased him as she readjusted her sunglasses.

Derek laughed. "You really think I'd do that?"

"You told Mark that I snore. I don't know what you're capable of," Meredith said, giggling.

"I told you, it came up in the conversation. Besides, you know I think it's adorable." Derek kissed her cheek and smiled. When she felt the tickle of his stubble against her skin, she couldn't help but melt her resolve. He was just too damn charming for his own good. Meredith knew it, and so did he.

But she still wasn't wearing a fishing vest.

"So how do we do this?" she asked.

Derek handed her one of the fishing poles then reached for the tackle box. "You just put the bait on the hook and cast," he said, as though it were the simplest explanation ever given. And maybe it was to someone else, but not her. She didn't even have all the lingo down, let alone the technique.

"I'm not exactly MacGyver, Derek. It could be dangerous," she giggled, only half joking.

Derek grinned widely at her, amused. "You've never been fishing before," he guessed.

"You married an indoor girl, remember?" Meredith reminded him. "Water, trees, air...not my specialty."

"I'll show you," Derek offered. He took the fishing pole from her and opened the tackle box next to him. _Easy enough_, she mused.

"What's in this water, anyway?" Meredith wondered out loud.

"Trout, mostly. Some bass and carp. Nothing too big," he shrugged.

Meredith bit her lip and peered over into the blue water below. There was something calming about the vastness of it all, how it seemed to go on forever. She sighed audibly, smiling at Derek. "Did your dad teach you how to fish?"

"Yep," Derek concurred. "I was five. We went out to Silver Lake, just the two of us. My sisters are very indoorsy like you," he chuckled. "It was fun. We would go a few times a year. A lot of the memories I have of my dad involve us fishing."

She leaned in and kissed Derek's cheek. It was all she could do to take away the sadness he felt every time he mentioned his father. He reciprocated by pressing a kiss to her temple, letting his lips linger there for a few seconds afterward.

"Are you gonna take our kids fishing?" Meredith asked him, calling back the levity to their conversation.

"If they're anything like you, I'm not sure they'll let me," Derek said teasingly.

Meredith nudged him with her hip. "Shut up," she giggled. "One of them is bound to like fishing."

"Let's hope."

"And if we—," Meredith said before stopping herself when she noticed the live worm he pulled from the tackle box. "Derek, that thing is alive."

"Yeah."

She flinched away from him after he showed it to her, all wiggly and slimy in his hand. "Get it away," she winced. "That's gross, Derek."

"Mer, it's bait. What'd you think people fished with?" he asked amusedly while attaching a hook to the end of his line.

"I'm not sticking a hook through a defenseless little worm, Derek. It's cruel," she decided seriously.

Derek pursed his lips for a moment and studied her, wondering what he could say to change her mind. Just as he was about to suggest doing it for her, Meredith reached for the small cooler they'd packed and set it on her lap.

"What're you getting?" Derek asked. While she was momentarily distracted, he quickly attached the bait and casted the line out into the water ahead of them. After fishing nearly his whole life, he was immune to the grossness that had her cringing.

But when she pulled a bag of jellybeans from the cooler, he couldn't help but smirk. "Why do we have jellybeans?"

"Because I like jellybeans," she shrugged in explanation. "It's my bait."

Derek bit back a laugh. "Mer, I don't think fish are fans of processed sugar."

"Don't care," Meredith said. "I refuse to lure fish with a living creature."

"Okay..." he drawled out slowly, figuring it was just easier to let her do what she wanted. The likelihood of her catching anything was slim to none, but still, she looked cute trying.

"There has to be at least one, non-cannibalistic fish in this water that enjoys the taste of jellybeans," she reasoned, knowing full well that the logic behind that probably needed some tweaking.

"Yeah, then maybe he could wash it down with a juicebox," Derek teased her before kissing her shoulder. He could taste the coconut from the sunscreen she'd swathed on her body and smiled.

She splashed some water onto his foot with her own and laughed. "Okay, you can stop with the mocking..."

"What? I love it," he chuckled. "Very innovative."

"Ass."

"Calling me an ass again on our anniversary?" he sighed in jest. "That's mean..."

Meredith rolled her eyes and popped a green jellybean into her mouth. "Fine. You're not an ass...sweetie," she groaned. They didn't do the term of endearment thing, so the word sounded strange as it came out of her mouth.

Derek laughed, taking a sip of the water bottle they were sharing. "Cute."

"So how long does it usually take to catch a fish?" Meredith asked.

"Depends. On a good day, they might bite right away. Other days, it can take a while," he explained. "Although, with that cherry jellybean you've got bobbing below the water, I'm sure they'll all come flocking," Derek winked at her.

"Okay," she warned, but still giggling. "If you want hot sex tonight, you might think twice before making fun of me."

Derek switched his fishing pole to the other hand and wrapped his free arm around her waist, sliding her closer to him on the dock. "You can't resist me," he grinned smugly, though in reality, it was the truth. "Remember when we had sex on this dock a long time ago?"

Meredith sighed contentedly at the memory and ran her fingers over the smooth wood they were sitting on. "Hmm...yeah," she smiled.

"See? You can't resist," he proved.

Rather than fight him on it any longer, she just rested her head on his shoulder, kissing the slightly stubbled skin at his jawline. "I can," Meredith countered. "I just choose not to."

Charlie plopped his head down on Meredith's lap and yawned. "You bored, buddy?" Derek laughed.

"I think he likes when we're home," Meredith said, petting the top of his head.

"I like being home too," he nodded. "Feels like whenever we're home these days, all we do is sleep."

"That's because this is the first weekend we've had off in months." Meredith pulled her feet from the water and wiggled her toes. "I've wanted to paint my toenails since March. Just got around to it Friday afternoon," she told him, sighing dramatically for effect.

Derek chuckled amusedly. "Where'd that come from?"

"Izzie," Meredith shrugged in explanation. "She bought two of the same color by mistake and gave me one of them. I kinda like it," she giggled.

"I noticed the Berry Splash on the bureau. Very pink and cheerful," he complimented. He felt a slight tug on his line and held it tighter. "Think I caught something..."

Meredith pulled her feet from the water so the slimy fish Derek was reeling in wouldn't touch her. "If it's small, let it go," she instructed.

"Fine," Derek agreed, laughing. When he pulled it from the water, he smiled proudly. "Rainbow trout. This is a nice one."

"Eww."

"What do you mean 'eww?'" Derek asked. "You like trout."

"Yeah, when it's dead. And cooked. And isn't flopping around," Meredith corrected. "Just...put it in the bucket before I throw up."

Derek rolled his eyes, amused at how grossed out she was, and put the fish in the bucket as Meredith requested. "You're cute," he smirked.

"I am not," she countered, nudging him with her hip. "Help me reel this back in."

"Are you sure you don't want to try a worm? You'll probably catch something," Derek pointed out as he reeled her hook back in toward them.

Meredith shook her head. "I'm good," she said. "I think I'll just finish off the rest of the jellybeans myself and watch you fish."

"You don't wanna fish anymore?" Derek asked, watching as she grabbed the bag of jellybeans and laid her head down on his lap.

"I want _you_ to fish," Meredith amended. "While I lay here and watch...and eat these," she said, popping a few of the jellybeans into her mouth.

Derek reached for her hand and kissed the top of it, smiling against her skin. Being married to her was always fun.

--

Summer at dusk in Seattle had never looked as beautiful as it did tonight, except on the night of their wedding. The sun was setting low in the sky, casting everything in yellows and reds and purples. And from their backyard, they knew there wasn't a better view of it. Meredith laid in Derek's arms, gently running her fingers through his hair as they shared kiss after kiss.

"Hmm...I love you," he murmured against her lips.

Meredith sighed. "I love you too."

"We need...to do this...more often," Derek said between kisses. He rolled her on top of him as they laid outstretched on the blanket over top the grass.

"We should," Meredith whispered, kissing him again before reaching for a chocolate covered strawberry, the chocolate courtesy of Mark's gift basket. She bit into it and moaned. "Remind me to thank Mark for his present."

"I made them," Derek reminded her with a chuckle.

Meredith smiled. "Yes, but he bought the melting chocolate..."

"Fine," he gave in.

"So..." Meredith rolled off of him and onto her stomach. She grabbed the book Izzie gave them and flipped to the sex position section, one they'd been picking and choosing from all weekend. "Which one tonight?"

"Twelve looks kinda fun," Derek smirked. "Your bendiness makes it easy."

Meredith studied the picture for a moment and bit her lip. "I think I like twelve," she giggled.

Derek popped the cork out of their sparkling apple cider, their 'alcoholic beverage' of choice since Meredith gave up drinking in the spirit of baby-making, and poured them each a glass. "Twelve it is," he laughed, clinking her glass against hers.

"This stuff is growing on me," Meredith said after taking a sip. "It's kinda...sweet. And the best part: no hangover in the morning."

Derek grinned, pulling her into his lap; she wrapped her legs around his waist. "Then I can't get drunk and take advantage of you," he pointed out.

"Hmm...that's how this all started," Meredith said, placing her hand on his back as she leaned in to kiss him again.

"Best drunken one night stand ever."

She smiled at her husband. "It really was."


	71. Trying to Have it All

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them! **

They had been going at this for nearly an hour. Normally they were good at this, but tonight it just wasn't working.

Derek was ready to let go at any minute, but Meredith didn't seem anywhere near close to finishing. He had done anything he could to help her. Stimulating her, stroking her, even changing positions, but still, she couldn't seem to fall over the edge.

"Mer," Derek breathed, holding her hips as she rotated back and forth on top of him.

"This isn't…I can't…I don't know why but it's just not working right now," Meredith panted, brushing some sweaty strands of hair off her face.

"Mer, that's okay," Derek said with a sympathetic smile. "Another time."

"But you…you're…," Meredith breathed as she raised and lowered herself on him a few more times.

"Don't worry about it," Derek comforted. He was more than ready, but was determined to hold back and wait for her. "It's okay."

Meredith looked at him and frowned. "Why isn't this working?"

"You're just tired, Mer. And you have to be getting sore. It's alright," Derek soothed, rubbing his hands on her thighs. "There's always tomorrow."

Meredith bit her lip and nodded in resignation. She gently eased herself off of him and dropped down next to him on the bed. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Derek said softly. He kissed her cheek before sitting up and getting out of bed. "I um…I'm just gonna go hop in the shower to get rid of...this."

She nodded dejectedly and rolled over in bed, pulling the covers over herself. "Okay."

"Meredith..."

"I'm just tired," Meredith shrugged beneath the blanket.

Rather than press the issue with her, he just leaned over the bed, pressed a kiss to her forehead and walked into the bathroom.

Sex had always been easy. It was their thing. Not that it was all they did, but from the very beginning, they'd been good at it. They knew what to do to each other and when, knew what made the other gasp and moan. They knew each other's bodies like the backs of their hands. So this was a first. He knew she was overly stressed with work lately, and barely had time to catch a nap or relax. There were some days when neither of them could keep their eyes open thirty seconds after crawling into bed. But whenever they started sex, they always got to the finish.

Derek eventually got out of the shower, dried off, and slipped into bed next to her. When he heard the soft snores coming from her, he smiled a little. Maybe all she needed was sleep. He wrapped his arm around her torso and spooned her up against his body. "I love you," he whispered into her hair.

Meredith, in her sleeping state, could still sense his presence and laced her fingers through his. She was relaxed, and Derek was glad for it.

--

"What do you mean you couldn't?" Cristina asked Meredith the next morning at work as they were changing into their scrubs.

Meredith clipped her name tag to her coat pocket and sighed. "I don't know. It's like...my body just shut off. I mean, the sex was good and everything like it always is, but I just...it was like I had a mental block and couldn't focus."

"Are you pregnant?" Izzie asked, taking a sip of her tea.

That seemed to be the default question these days. If Meredith had a stomachache, or a headache, or her hand subconsciously drifted across her abdomen, she was asked that question. Meredith shook her head. "No, I'm not."

"Maybe it's just stress," Izzie pointed out. "I mean, you're trying to get pregnant and still working as a fourth year resident. That's a lot, Mer."

"That's what Derek said," Meredith sighed. "But I felt bad afterward. He was all...you know. But he didn't, for my sake. After he got out of the shower, I was already sleeping."

"Hey, I fell asleep during sex before. Don't feel too bad," Cristina said, her way of being supportive.

Alex and George, having caught the tail-end of that sentence, hesitated before entering the resident lounge. "Are you three talking about sex?" George asked.

"Yes," the three of them said in unison.

"We'll be waiting in the hall," Alex sighed as he and George turned around and left. There were some things they just didn't want to know.

"Maybe you're just PMS-ing," Cristina suggested.

Meredith shrugged as she pulled her hair back into a ponytail. "Yeah, maybe."

"Oh, before I forget, would you two want to come over tonight and help me with wedding invitations? We're trying to save money by doing them ourselves, but because Alex's penmanship is illegible, I'm not letting him help. Are either of you free?" Izzie asked hopefully.

"Can't. On call," Cristina replied.

"Mer?"

"Yeah, I'll help," Meredith agreed, taking a sip of coffee.

Izzie smiled. "Thank you."

"Bailey's coming," George said as he peeked his head in the door, signaling the end of their girl talk.

The three of them walked into the hallway to receive their assignments. The OR board was pretty unimpressive today, so Meredith sighed in relief when Derek approached them. If he had a surgery, she had first dibs, given that she was the only one of the five of them to choose neuro. So unless Dr. Bailey had assigned her otherwise, she'd be spending the day with him.

"Quiet board today," Bailey said. "That could mean bad things are coming, but for now, we'll hope that doesn't happen. I've got a colectomy, two appys, a c-section, a below the knee amputation, and an obstructed bowel," she rattled off.

Cristina groaned audibly. "Smorgasbord of boring."

"That's all?" Alex complained. "Dude, come on..."

"Hey, not my fault. If you want bigger and better things, go find your specialty attendings and ask. Otherwise, this is what I've got for today. Slow day. And let's be thankful for that," Bailey said as she turned to walk away.

Derek stepped in and smiled. "Dr. Bailey, would you mind if Meredith scrubbed in with me today? I have a new case from Portland that just flew in this morning," he explained.

"Fine with me," Bailey approved.

Meredith smiled gratefully at her husband. Her knight in shining scrubs, saving her from a day of dullness. "Thank you," she said softly after reaching his side.

"Figured you'd want to have a productive day," he explained as they walked toward their patient's room. "Can I have a sip of that?" Derek asked.

Meredith handed him her coffee cup. "Decaf," she warned. "It doesn't do much to wake you up."

"I can pretend it helps," Derek shrugged amusedly before taking a sip. "Why'd you get decaf?"

"I'm trying to cut back," Meredith yawned. "Caffeine is bad while trying to conceive, remember?"

Derek gently squeezed her hand and kissed her cheek. "Okay," he whispered. Rather than skirt the issue, he decided to dive right in. "So...what happened last night. Are you okay?"

"I was tired, I guess. I'm sorry," she said, embarrassed. "I think I might be PMS-ing, which means no baby this month..."

"Mer." Derek pulled her aside to an empty area of the hallway and smiled at her. "First of all, you don't have to be sorry for anything. And second, if there's no baby this month, that's no big deal. We haven't even been trying that long. It's okay. Alright?" he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

She nodded and leaned into him. "Okay," she said softly.

"I love you."

Meredith smiled against his chest. "I love you too."

"Ready to go meet our patient?" he asked.

"Hmm...so there's really a patient? I was kinda hoping you made that up so we could sneak away without anyone knowing," she giggled.

Derek laughed. "I'll keep that in mind for next time."

The two of them finished the walk toward their patient's room and entered after two short knocks. "Sarah Graham?" Derek greeted the woman. "Hi. Dr. Shepherd. So I see you were flown here from Portland General because of a fetal spinal tumor."

Sarah's husband nodded. "The doctors didn't have the means to treat it, so they sent us here. They said you were the best," he said hopefully.

"You can fix it, right?" Sarah asked, running her hand protectively over her pregnant belly. "You can save our daughter?

"After Dr. Jensen delivers your baby this afternoon, I'll step in and remove the tumor. Barring any complications, she should have a full recovery. I don't want you to panic, okay?" Derek said comfortingly. "Dr. Shepherd is going to take you for an abdominal CT, which will give us a game plan of how exactly to treat your daughter."

Meredith smiled at the worried parents-to-be reassuringly. "Which is safe," she added. "And after that, hopefully Dr. Jensen will be ready to take you into the OR for your c-section."

Sarah let out a deep breath and leaned her back on the pillows. "Okay," she said.

"Meet you at lunch," Derek whispered into Meredith's ear before he left the room.

She nodded and smiled at him, then turned her attention toward Sarah and her husband. "So, uh, do you have a name picked out?" Meredith asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Caroline," Sarah said with a smile.

"That's beautiful," Meredith complimented as she wheeled the woman toward the elevator, her husband in tow.

"It took us nearly all nine months to pick a name. We kept switching back and forth. But once we found Caroline, we knew that was the one," her husband Jim explained, holding onto Sarah's hand.

"Do you and the other Dr. Shepherd have any kids?" Sarah asked conversationally.

Meredith pressed the button for the elevator and looked at the woman. "Hmm?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. None of my business. Just nerves talking, I guess," she apologized. "Same last name...I just assumed you were married," Sarah blushed.

"Oh, yeah, we are," Meredith laughed. "Nope, no kids yet. We've been working on that."

"Jim and I tried for almost a year before the stick turned blue for us. And that feeling? Nothing like it in the world," Sarah said, smiling at her husband.

Meredith couldn't help but mirror both of their smiles. She knew that one day, she and Derek would know what that felt like.

--

"Hey," Meredith greeted Derek, walking into his office with Sarah's CT results. When she saw their lunch sitting on the table, her stomach growled. She hadn't even realized just how hungry she was until food was put in front of her.

Derek smiled. "Hey. Are those Sarah's films?"

"Yeah. From what I can tell, the baby's tumor spans from T-11 to L-1. But it doesn't look too interwoven," Meredith explained, dropping down next to him on the couch.

"Good," Derek agreed. He pulled the CT scans from the envelope and reviewed them while Meredith reached for her iced tea. "I got you a chicken sandwich and potato salad. Carbs and proteins to keep you energized," he winked at her.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "And mayo to fatten me up," she said, taking a heaping spoonful of the potato salad. "But who cares? It's good."

"Damn, look here," Derek said, pointing to the CT. "See that tiny black smudge? Pseudo-aneurysm."

"In between the tumor?"

"On top of it," he sighed.

"Is that...can we fix that?" she asked.

"I think so, but...what makes it difficult are the nerves surrounding it. I clip one, and boom, she has no leg function" Derek said. "Poor kid."

Meredith frowned. "Yeah." She studied the scans for a few moments then turned to Derek. "Well, what if you cut the pseudo-aneurysm out first. Use the tumor as a barrier so you don't hit the spinal cord."

Derek nodded slowly. "Like a cushion."

"Exactly," Meredith agreed. "Would that work?"

"I think. Yeah, it could," Derek replied. He looked to his wife and smiled. "That's...you're good, Mer."

"I just have a good teacher," she joked, taking a bite of her chicken sandwich. "So Sarah's surgery is in OR 3 at three o'clock, and I booked OR 2 for Caroline's surgery at three, too, so we can take her right in."

"Caroline?" Derek asked, confused.

Meredith reached for her iced tea bottle. "The baby. They're naming her Caroline."

"Pretty name," Derek said, eating a spoonful of his soup.

"It is," Meredith agreed before yawning. "So, since I'm a genius and all and came up with that surgery, can you cover for me while I take a nap?" she asked, smiling at him.

"Yeah. It's a slow day. I guess I could do that," he grinned. "Oh, almost forgot, the Chief called a meeting for all the department heads at six, so I'll just meet you at home so you don't have to wait around."

"Iz wants me to go over and help with wedding stuff, so I'll be there anyway," Meredith explained. "So if I'm not home by nine, I need you to come save me."

"And vice versa," Derek teased.

Meredith giggled. "Sounds like a plan."

--

When Meredith woke up on the couch two hours later, she rolled onto her back sleepily. Napping had become a treasured hobby, one that she took advantage of whenever she had the chance to do so. She looked at her watch curiously, anticipating the amount of time she had before her surgery. 4:49. Meredith sprang up on the couch, all tiredness quickly replaced with equal amounts of shock and annoyance. The surgery started almost two hours ago, and no one had woken her up.

_Derek_, she thought. She groaned out loud as she pulled her shoes on and grabbed her coat, eager to make her way downstairs to the OR floor to see if the surgery had been pushed back. Otherwise, her husband would be getting his ass kicked for letting her sleep through it.

Sure enough, when she got downstairs, the OR board hadn't been changed. Tumor removal in OR 2 at three o'clock. "Damn it," she whispered.

"What's the matter?" Alex asked as he approached her.

"My stupid husband decided to let me oversleep and let George scrub in on the surgery. The surgery that_ I_ came up with. Ass," she ranted mostly to herself, but in Alex's ear.

"I just scrubbed out on the c-section. Cute kid," Alex said. "Shepherd took her right next door."

Meredith put her hands on her hips. "Ass."

"What did I do?"

"Not you," Meredith shook her head. "Derek."

"I'm sure he can explain," Alex countered.

Meredith angrily narrowed her eyes at her friend, so Alex had no choice but to agree with her. "Fine. He's a douche."

"Thank you."

"What're you doing?" Alex asked as Meredith headed towards the nurses' station.

"Getting myself a surgery. Any leftovers from earlier?" she asked.

"Why aren't you scrubbed in with Derek?" Bailey asked as she deposited a stack of charts.

"Because he's a douche," Alex answered for her.

"Thank you," Meredith repeated.

Rather than ask for an elaboration, Bailey handed Meredith one of her charts. "Appy. Yours if you want it," she offered.

"By myself?"

"No fair," Alex rebutted.

"I've got one for you too, Karev." Bailey handed Alex another chart then grabbed one for herself. "That frees me up for the colectomy. Now don't let me down and kill these patients or I'll kick both of your asses. Got it?" she asked.

Meredith and Alex nodded in unison. "Got it."

While in surgery, as she single-handedly removed her patient's appendix, Meredith was borderline seething on the inside. Sure, getting to do a solo surgery was fun. But she'd done a handful of solo appys before. And frankly, scrubbing in on a surgery with Derek was always more exciting. As she worked, Meredith prepared her angry speech to Derek, working in hand gestures as she went. She would have even threatened to withhold sex if she wasn't trying to get pregnant. But she kind of needed him for that.

She knew that's what this was all about. Derek knew she was exhausted, and letting her rest whenever she could would only help with the whole baby making thing. If it weren't affecting her career, Meredith may have found it sweet. But today, it just pissed her off. She was glad she could go to Izzie's tonight and cool off. Maybe when she got home, Derek wouldn't have to suffer such a bitter wrath.

After finishing the short surgery, she scrubbed out and headed toward the resident lounge to change. It was nearing six o'clock and Derek was probably just finishing up the baby's surgery. Meredith changed as quickly as she could, hoping to avoid having to talk to him before she left. That was a conversation she'd rather save for home, in case there was any bloodshed.

By some stroke of luck, she was able to escape without Derek knowing, and made the short drive over to her old house. Izzie pulled in right next to her in the driveway and smiled. "Hey Mer," she said. "Thanks for coming."

"No problem," Meredith shrugged. "Actually, you picked a good day for this. I need the distraction."

Izzie opened the front door and frowned at her friend. "What happened?"

"Derek and I were supposed to scrub in this afternoon, but instead of waking me up, he let me sleep through it. He's been worried about me getting enough sleep and stuff because we're trying to get pregnant, but it's like he's mommy tracking me already," Meredith ranted as they walked into the kitchen. She hadn't been there in a few months, but everything looked surprisingly the same. Izzie had always loved the house, and made it more homey than Meredith ever attempted to. That was Izzie's forte.

Meredith sat down at the kitchen table while Izzie grabbed the boxes full of wedding invitations off the counter. "Well, do you see where he's coming from?" Izzie asked.

"Yes, but still. He can't do that stuff at work. I mean, it's different if he let me sleep through dinner or something. But this is my job, Iz," Meredith explained.

Izzie, aware of Meredith's decaf coffee rule, but not having any to make, put on a pot of water to make some tea and set a plate of cookies down on the table for them. "Yeah, but..." Izzie countered. "You two are married. No matter how professional you try to keep it, it's never going to be strictly business between you guys. At home or at work, you love each other. That doesn't go away once you step through the doors of the hospital."

"But he's making me feel incompetent," Meredith pointed out.

"Then you need to tell him that."

"I plan to," Meredith groaned as she bit into a cookie. "Believe me, I plan to."

Izzie took a cookie of her own. "I'm not saying don't yell at him. I know I'd yell at Alex if he did that. But try to see where he's coming from. I mean, Meredith, you couldn't even make it to the finish during sex. And that's one thing you're good at. Sorry if that sounds weird, but coming from someone who slept across the hall every night before you guys moved out, I know that doesn't happen unless there's a reason."

"Yeah. Because I'd just worked a forty-eight hour shift and my need for sleep won out against my horniness," Meredith said, much to her own annoyance. Orgasms made things so much better, so not having one last night didn't help her mood.

"That's what I'm saying. You're stressed out. He gets that," Izzie said. "Like it or not, he knows you, Mer."

"I know he does," Meredith sighed, running a hand through her hair. "But I'm still pissed. Plus, I think I'm starting my period soon, which makes me extra bitchy."

Izzie smiled sympathetically at her friend. "It's gonna be okay."

"I know," Meredith said softly. "After I go home and get if off my chest, I'll be fine. Until then, let's just do these wedding invitations. I need to distract myself," she managed to giggle.

"Okay," Izzie laughed, opening the lid to one of the boxes containing the invites. "Feel free to bitch. I'm willing to listen."

Meredith smiled. "Thank you."

--

It was a little after nine when Meredith finally made it home, surprised to find that Derek wasn't there. The Chief's meetings always had a tendency to run long, so she wasn't too concerned. After pulling back the covers so Charlie could make himself comfortable, as he did most nights, Meredith walked into the bathroom, peed, wiped, and let out a heavy sigh. Like clockwork, her period had arrived. It wasn't unexpected, but it still filled her with disappointment. No baby this month. Meredith knew they hadn't been trying that long, but every month since May, she'd been hoping for that miracle. The miracle would happen, she knew, but waiting for it wasn't easy.

She stripped off her clothes, showered, and just let herself relax under the water spray. After a tough day, a hot shower was the next best thing to crawling in bed. But even after getting out, Derek was still MIA. It wasn't until she'd just settled under the covers and flipped on the TV that she heard him unlock the front door. Meredith sat up in bed and waited for him. She had some yelling to do, and until she let it all out, she wouldn't be able to sleep.

Derek walked into their bedroom, already seeming to brace himself for her tirade. "Hey," he said sheepishly.

Meredith muted the TV and crossed her arms over her chest. "Hey."

"You're mad. I know, you're mad," he jumped right in. "And I'm sorry about that."

"Why didn't you wake me up? You knew how much I wanted to scrub in on that surgery, and you didn't even bother to page me," Meredith said, raising her voice a little.

"I paged you twice, came upstairs to check on you, saw you sleeping on the couch, and decided not to wake you up. I made a judgment call. I know how frazzled you've been these past few months, and I didn't want to have to wake you up," Derek explained as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"You can't do that. I know I'm your wife, but...Der, just because we're married doesn't mean you can do stuff like that," Meredith told him.

Derek ran a hand through his hair. "If we weren't trying to conceive, I would have woken you up. But you being tired and stressed out doesn't exactly help with that, Mer."

"Well, guess what? I just got my period, which means you can treat me like everyone else until we can start trying again in a week," she snapped, wiping a few angry tears from her eyes.

"Meredith..."

"Whatever," she shrugged. "I have to do my job, Derek. Even if I'm trying to get pregnant. I can't get special treatment or get kicked off surgeries. You can't mommy track me."

"Okay, okay. You're right. I'm sorry," Derek apologized.

She swallowed hard, trying her best to stop her tears but to no avail. They spilled from her eyes like a leaky faucet and Derek quickly wiped them away with his thumbs. "Hey, hey," he said softly. "Alright, I'm sorry. I won't do it again," he said, wrapping his arms around her.

Meredith's body was wracked with unexpected sobs and she cried into his shoulder. "I'm so tired, Derek. I thought this would be easy, but...it's not," she confessed. "My mother always said I had to choose. That I couldn't have both. Maybe she was right, I mean--"

"Meredith," he said, tilting her chin toward him. "I don't want you to think that. You've achieved more than your mother ever did. Every day, you prove her wrong. And you're going to keep doing it. If you don't want a baby right now, just tell me. We can wait," Derek assured her.

"No, it's not that. I want a baby. I'm just worried that it won't happen because I'm so stressed out, and that's bad for me, and then you do things like let me sleep through a surgery, and I start to feel like I'm bad at my job, which is almost as bad as thinking I won't be able to get pregnant," Meredith rambled, coughing a little on her sobs.

Derek kicked off his shoes and pulled her into his lap. "Mer," he whispered into her hair. "You're an incredible surgeon. You helped save Caroline's life today. You may not have been in the OR, but you're part of the reason why she's going to live a healthy life. Every day, you do things like that. It's in your blood. That's never going to change. And we _will_ make a baby, Meredith. If we'd been trying for years, I'd be concerned. But it's only been a few months, which isn't long at all. It'll happen. I don't want you to worry about that. But if you do, then I want you to tell me about it. Okay?" he asked, running his fingers down her back.

Meredith pressed a kiss to his neck and sniffled. "Okay."

"And so what if you got your period? We just keep trying then, that's all," Derek shrugged.

She pulled back from their embrace a little and wiped her eyes with the tissue Derek handed her. "Some days, I just wish we could just camp out at home where it isn't stressful and exhausting," she confessed.

Derek pursed his lips and brushed her hair from her face. "I have an idea."

"What?"

"How about we save our Bermuda trip next month for another time, and stay home all week. It'll be our own little vacation, except we won't go anywhere," Derek suggested. "We already worked all those extra hours to gain vacation time. So technically, that time is ours."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked. Somehow, a week spent at home with her husband and their dog was a lot more appealing than having to pack for a flight and go away. Sure, once they got there, it would be relaxing, but all the stress leading up to it outweighed the rest.

"Those tickets don't expire. We could just re-book. How's that sound?" Derek smiled at her, his usual love and concern shining through in his eyes.

Meredith bit her lip and nodded. "I'd like that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she echoed. "Hiding out at home sounds like the best vacation ever," Meredith managed to giggle.

Derek laughed. "I think so too." He quickly stripped down to his boxers and grabbed a tee shirt from his drawer, then rejoined her in bed. "I really am sorry about today," he repeated. "If I'd known how much it would hurt you, I wouldn't have--"

Meredith put a finger to his lips and smiled. "I get it. It's okay."

"You still love me, right?" Derek chuckled, wrapping his arm around her waist as she scooted closer to him.

"Yeah, I do," Meredith whispered. She pressed her palm to his cheek and kissed her husband for the first time in hours. "You're gonna have to make this up to me with a lot of sex."

Derek grinned. "Yes, dear."

**Yes, those last lines were late additions. Call me a fraud, but I had to do it. That scene on Thursday was beyond adorable. I love married Meredith and Derek so much. :')**


	72. Vacation at Home

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no. It's not mine.**

Derek had never seen Meredith so relaxed. Three days into their vacation at home, and they'd gotten more sleep than they'd had in weeks. It was nice, the chance to sleep in and have sex and lounge around without the worry of pagers going off or having to get up before sunrise to get to work. Though they only had seven days to take a time out and relax, it was an appreciated seven days of bliss.

He watched as she walked around in the kitchen in her camisole and panties, attempting to cook something that vaguely looked like pancakes on the stove. The smoke alarm hadn't gone off yet, which Derek took as a good sign. He still got worried every time she played chef in the kitchen. Meredith wasn't exactly Martha Stewart, but she tried. And Derek always found her efforts amusing.

"Hey," he chuckled, leaning against the door frame in his boxers and tee shirt.

Meredith spun around and smiled at her husband. "Hey."

"What're you making?" Derek asked. He took a seat at the counter and peered into the frying pan. Definitely pancakes. And they even looked surprisingly edible.

"Pancakes," she said. "I'm making eggs now. What kind do you want?" Meredith asked as she opened the refrigerator door and pulled out the egg carton.

Derek poured himself a cup of coffee. Decaf as usual. "Scrambled, please," he requested.

"Cheese?"

"Sure..."

Meredith noticed the look he had on his face and giggled. "What?"

"I'm...impressed," Derek said with a laugh.

She tossed a dish towel at him and smirked. "Excuse me, I made cheeseburgers last night. And they were so good that you sexed me on the table in gratitude," Meredith reminded him.

"That's what I'm saying," Derek said, amused. "Seeing you cook really turns me on."

Meredith giggled. "Does it?" she asked, cracking egg after egg into the glass bowl.

Derek walked around the counter and grabbed another frying pan from the overhead rack. "It does."

"Hmm...well, I would say we could have sex right here, right now, but then we wouldn't have breakfast because it would be burnt to a crisp," Meredith pointed out.

"Breakfast first, sex later," Derek compromised.

Meredith pulled the whisk from the drawer and smiled. "That's all we've been doing for the past three days. Eating and having sex."

"Two things we're very good at."

"We are," Derek chuckled. "Here, let me help." He got up and poured the whisked eggs into the frying pan while she went back to tending to her pancakes.

"This is nice," Meredith mused out loud, resting her head on Derek's shoulder for a few moments. "Just being home with you and Charlie. Cooking in my tank top and panties. Getting to sleep in until noon."

"I especially love the cooking in your panties part," Derek smirked, pressing a kiss to her temple. "You should do that every day."

"Mmhmm..." Meredith agreed sarcastically. "Maybe I should just walk around naked."

"I think so, yes," he winked.

She turned the stove knob to a low flame, then wrapped her arms around his neck. "I think we're getting closer, Derek."

"Hmm?"

"I think...I don't know. This is the first time in months that we're both relaxed and energized and...I just think that we're going to make a baby soon. I can feel it," Meredith whispered, resting her forehead against his.

Derek pulled her to him and smiled. "Me too."

"Or it could just be overly orgasmed brain, but I think maybe, I might be right," she said.

"We should probably read the book Izzie got us...you know, not just the sex position part," Derek said playfully, trailing his fingers up and down her back.

"After breakfast?" Meredith suggested. "Or brunch, I guess, considering it's after eleven already."

He laughed. "Love to."

--

Meredith stretched out on the couch with the "how-to" book on conceiving resting on her stomach. Derek sat on the opposite end, leisurely folding a basket of laundry as she read things out loud. Lounging around doing laundry may have been a mundane task to any other couple; but for them, _only_ having to do laundry was a rare gift.

"A list of tips and tricks to help you and your partner make a baby," she dictated. "In no specific order, blah blah blah...okay, start taking folic acid even before trying to conceive. Doing that already. Aah, something we're experts at...keep baby making fun. Have sex in different rooms at different times of day so sex doesn't start feeling like a chore..."

"Sex is never a chore," Derek chuckled, folding one of Meredith's tee shirts and setting it on the arm of the couch.

"Never," Meredith agreed, giggling.

"What's next?" he asked.

Meredith found her spot on the page and read the next tip. "Don't run to the bathroom right after making love. Lying down for a minimum of five minutes after intercourse will help the sperm get to where it needs to be," she said. "Words like "intercourse" and "sperm" make all of this very un-sexy," Meredith cringed.

"We're doctors," Derek pointed out with a laugh.

"Still," Meredith maintained. "Okay, uh...have sex often during your five day fertile window to ensure a fresh shipment of sperm waiting in the fallopian tube at any given time." She sighed amusedly. "It's like we're back in anatomy class."

"We could play professor and student tonight...reenactment might be fun," Derek teased.

She just rolled her eyes and laughed. "Moving on," she dismissed. "Oh! Switch to decaf coffee. Caffeine is thought to restrict blood flow to the uterus, which can stall the baby making process. I haven't had any caffeine in months, so we're good there."

"Good," Derek smiled, folding a pair of his socks.

"Be sure to schedule your preconception checkup to review your medical history and make sure your body is ready to carry a child," Meredith read. "Did that the week after we decided to start trying. Keep track of your menstrual cycles. Do that too. Then there's about ten bullet points that have to do with my hoo-hoo, which I'll kindly skip over and read to myself later for the sake of our sex life..." she skirted.

Derek lifted a pair of her panties from the basket and smirked at her. "Mer, I'm folding your panties. Pretty sure I can handle that stuff. I've seen it all anyway..."

"Some things, I just don't want to say out loud, even though you're my husband," she insisted humorously, turning the page. "Getting enough sleep...that's something we need to work on," Meredith sighed.

"That's what these seven days off are for," Derek said, always an optimist. "And having marathon sex."

"Well, obviously," she giggled. "It says that missionary, though it gets a bad rap for being boring, is one of the most effective positions because of gravity. I happen to like missionary..." Meredith stated.

"Me too," Derek agreed. "And that doesn't make us boring..."

Meredith smirked. "Well, after what we did last night, I don't think anyone would ever call us boring," she said, resting her bare feet on his lap.

Derek gently grasped her ankles and pulled her to him so she was eventually settled in his lap. "Hmm...never," he said softly, leaning in and kissing her.

"I think we should do that again," Meredith whispered into his ear. She reached into his boxers and lightly ran her fingers over him. That always did him in.

He quickly pulled her camisole over her head and grinned. "Definitely."

--

Just as they were putting their clothes back on after their sex session on the couch, their house phone rang, pulling them both from their post-sex fog. "Der, can you get that?" she asked, pulling her camisole back over her head.

"Yeah." Derek reached over to the end table and grabbed the phone from the receiver. "Hello?" he greeted.

"Hey, it's Izzie."

Derek smiled. "Hey, everything okay?" he asked, noticing the slight nervous pitch in her voice.

"Yeah, everything's fine," she said. "So, uh...I know this is your week off and I hate to ask..."

"What's up?"

"Is there any chance you and Mer could run a few errands for Alex and me? We're both on call tonight, or else we would do it ourselves, and I'm--"

Derek looked to Meredith and rolled his eyes amusedly. "It's alright. What do you need?"

"If you wouldn't mind, could you swing by the caterers and give them a check? It's right by the hospital, so I'll meet you at the front. Oh, and tell Mer not to forget that she has an appointment to get her dress fitted today at three; otherwise, they won't have it done in time for the wedding. And, if it's okay, would you mind picking my dress up at the store and bringing it to the house?" Izzie asked, holding her breath while she waited for an answer.

"Uh...sure," Derek reluctantly agreed. "I guess we could do that..."

"Thank you!" Izzie said, releasing a heavy sigh. "Really, you have no idea how much that means to us. Thank you," she repeated.

"It's no problem" Derek said. "We'll, uh, we'll meet you at the hospital."

After Derek eventually hung up the phone, Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "What was that all about?"

"Izzie needs us to do wedding stuff for her. I would have said no, except she helped plan ours, so that would be tacky," he laughed. "Oh, and you have to be fitted today."

"Damn, forgot about that," Meredith sighed as they began to walk upstairs to get dressed to go out. "Well, now we have an excuse to rejoin the outside world," she giggled.

"I'm beginning to forget what that's like," Derek chuckled. "It's kinda nice not leaving the house for days at a time."

"And walking around naked."

Derek grinned. "And the inappropriate sex in inappropriate places."

Meredith turned around to face him, then pulled off her shirt again. "Quickie in the shower?"

He answered by picking her up and pressing his lips against his. May as well make the most out of a whole week off.

--

"You look hot in this," Derek said while he and Meredith waited for the seamstress to do the final fittings on her dress.

Meredith looked herself over in the mirror, running her hands over the front of her crimson satin bridesmaid dress. "Is that your way of getting dressing room sex from me?"

"No," he chuckled. "I'm just saying that you look really pretty. Red suits you."

Another seamstress popped her head into the dressing area. "Nina will be with you shortly. She's just running late with her last appointment."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She turned to Derek and smiled. "Come on, we can have a quickie while we wait," she said, already taking his hand and leading him into the dressing room.

"What if she walks in?" Derek asked halfheartedly as she pushed his jeans and boxers down to his ankles. He loved it when she was feisty and daring, but this was risky, even for them.

"We're trying to make a baby, Derek. Sometimes we have to be spontaneous," Meredith shrugged, giggling when he picked her up.

Derek lifted the dress up so it pooled around her waist and pushed her panties aside. "Okay, then..." he grinned, gently propping her up against the wall for support.

When he slipped into her, Meredith gasped and dropped her head to his shoulder. "Derek," she whispered, pressing kisses to his neck to keep from screaming.

"Meredith," he moaned. Risky or not, inappropriate sex in inappropriate places was still incredible.

"Faster, Der," she commanded before reaching down and massaging the tiny bundle of nerves between her legs with her fingers. "Oh crap!"

He continued thrusting in and out, trying to push them both over the edge before someone walked in and caught them. "Come on, Mer," he said softly, replacing her fingers with his own and stroking her with more pressure.

"Derek! Derek!" she chanted softly, wrapping her legs tighter around his waist as she came. "Holy--Derek!" she panted. Moments later he released into her and her walls spasmed all around him.

"Oh God," he breathed, hugging her tight so she wouldn't fall boneless onto the floor. "Good idea."

She giggled through her erratic breathing. "Told you we could do it."

Before they jinxed their luck, Derek slipped out of her and gently set her back on her feet, taking hold of her arm to keep her upright. "You okay?" he chuckled.

"That was the fastest sex we've ever had," Meredith laughed. She looked in front of the mirror and smoothed out her dress and hair, so no one would be suspicious of their sexcapade.

"You really do look beautiful," Derek smiled, pressing a kiss to her neck.

"Hmm...thanks." Meredith turned around and draped her arms over his shoulders. "But it's probably just my sex glow," she giggled.

"Sex glow or not, you're beautiful," he said.

Meredith leaned in and kissed him then, slowly, letting herself enjoy the brief intimacy with her husband. "I love you."

"I love you too," Derek whispered.

"We should probably get back out there," she decided. "Let's just get this over with..."

"Okay," he chuckled.

They walked out of the dressing room, bracing themselves as they made sure no one heard them. When the coast was clear, they both breathed a sigh of relief. "Alright, back up on the pedestal," Derek smirked.

"I just gave you dirty sex in a dressing room. You can't mock me," Meredith warned him.

"Not mocking. Just...saying," he defended.

"Mmhmm..."

Derek laughed. "What?"

"Seeing me dressed up like Bridesmaid Barbie amuses you."

"A little, yeah," he admitted.

"That's all I'm saying."

--

Errand number three, dropping Izzie's dress off at the old house, was finally completed and not a minute too soon. Running errands all around town wasn't the most relaxing way to spend a day off, but they still made the most of it and managed to have fun. As they drove down the road on their way home, Meredith looked to her husband. "Let's get food; I'm starving."

"Alright," Derek nodded. "An eat-in restaurant or..."

"I was thinking more like a Big Mac," Meredith laughed. "Flip flops and shorts aren't the best attire for booths and candlelight."

Derek pulled onto another road, lined with shops and restaurants. "You really want McDonald's?"

"Ooh, no, Taco Bell," Meredith changed her mind as she saw it approaching on the left. "Let's get that."

"You're sure?" he asked before entering the parking lot.

"Yes," she affirmed. When they pulled into the drive-thru, Meredith studied the menu board for a few moments. "I want a Nacho Bell Grande, a soft taco, and...one of those potato bowl things with the nacho cheese on top, and some nachos," she decided.

He laughed. "Is that all?"

"Yes."

"Okay," Derek said. After ordering her epic meal and a taco for himself, he handed her the bag and pulled back onto the road. "I don't think I want to share a bed with you tonight..." he joked.

Meredith pulled a nacho from the bag and crunched on it. "Why?"

"All that Mexican food? Do I really need to spell it out?"

"Derek Shepherd!" Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "First of all, Taco Bell is _not_ authentic Mexican. Second, if you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting, I'm seriously going to kick your ass."

"What?" he asked defensively.

She tossed a nacho at him and scoffed. "Fine. So I've burped in front of you a few times. Accidentally. What's the big deal?"

"And...that which comes from a little further south," Derek said with an amused smile, attempting to sound vague, but failing wholeheartedly.

Meredith's face turned bright red in mortification and she turned her head toward the window. "Oh my God," she gasped. "You're making that up. When have I ever...in front of you?"

"I'm a light sleeper," Derek shrugged. "Besides, we all do it. And we're both doctors. It's no big deal..."

"Oh my God," Meredith repeated, unable to look him in the eye. Or even have him in her line of vision at all.

"Meredith," he laughed. "We're married. We've seen each other naked a thousand times. I buy your tampons without you even having to ask. It doesn't matter."

"I won't be able to look at or talk to you for weeks," she groaned, keeping her head trained out the window.

Derek stopped at a red light and took her hand. He found the entire conversation, and her freak out, entirely too amusing. "Mer, I love you. And you know what? We're gonna make a beautiful, giggly, gassy little baby one of these days and you're gonna realize just how funny all of this is..."

"You can't be an ass and bring up a baby in the same sentence," she hissed. "You know any baby talk turns me into a pile of mush..."

"Which is why I did it," Derek smirked. "Spit up, diapers, potty training, getting pooped on. We're in for years of that fun stuff."

"I know that's gross, but I can't wait for it," Meredith said, her resolve always melting instantly when Derek said things like that.

"Still mad at me?"

Meredith nudged him with her elbow. "Hmm..." she mumbled. "Mortified. But not mad."

"I love you, Meredith," Derek chuckled, taking her hand and kissing the top of it.

"Yeah, yeah," she sighed. "If we weren't trying to make a baby, I'd be withholding sex for a week..."

"Neither of us would make it that long," he pointed out.

"Oh, I could make it. I was once celibate, remember?" she asked, pulling her taco from the bag and peeling back the paper wrapper surrounding it. Screw waiting until they got home. She was hungry, and the taco was still warm. "I could pull out the knitting needles...channel all my energy into knitting a quilt for our bed."

Derek rolled his eyes playfully. His wife was a terrible bluffer. "Mmhmm..."

"What? I could do it," Meredith said, biting into her taco and moaning at how good it tasted.

"Good thing sex is a requirement for making a baby then, huh?" He looked over and winked at her. "Can I have a bite of that?"

"Will you stop making fun of me?" she teased him.

"I never made fun of you," Derek said.

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "You're so full of it," she giggled, but still handed the taco over so he could take a bite.

"This _is_ really good," Derek agreed as he chewed.

"Now who's gonna be gassy?" Meredith smirked.

"Both of us."

She shook her head amusedly and laughed. "I think all this time off is making us crazy."

"I think it has," Derek grinned.

A week of no work, spontaneous sex, fast food, and odd conversations in the car. As far as vacations went, this one was almost as good as their honeymoon.

--

**I hope nobody was offended by that last scene. But I love the idea of those two having a conversation like that. Because they're married now, and comfortable with each other, and I love that about them. :)**

**Reviews make my day!**


	73. Going to a Wedding

**Disclaimer: Maybe one day. **

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate all of them! This chapter is kinda long. I would have cut it in two, but it really wouldn't make sense to do that. First up, some sex. ;)**

Izzie and Alex's wedding day had arrived. After months of cake tasting and dress sampling, October tenth was upon them. Today, Meredith and Derek would have to get dressed up. Crimson satin and black suit, respectively. An afternoon spent sitting in a churchy church, then celebrating the night away at the reception. A fun way to spend a Saturday, just not the early wake-up that came along with it.

The alarm went off at nine, blaring incessantly until Derek finally reached over to the nightstand and shut it off. He groaned into his pillow, the need to close his eyes and go back to sleep overwhelming him. Nine o'clock was late on a work day. But on a day off, it was no better than the crack of dawn, especially when the night before had been filled with marathon sex.

Meredith's eyelids fluttered open when she felt Derek pull her into his arms, nuzzling his face into her neck. "Morning," she murmured sleepily.

"Morning," he echoed.

"I don't wanna get up," Meredith pouted, running her hand over his warm thigh.

Derek smiled tiredly against her skin. "Sex?" he suggested. If there was one thing that always ensured a good start to the day, it was sex.

Meredith laughed, suddenly finding herself a little more awake, and rolled Derek on top of her. "Sex," she agreed.

"Happy wedding-day-that-isn't-ours," Derek chuckled, threading his fingers through her hair and leaning down to kiss her.

She giggled against his lips. "Hmm...you too."

Derek trailed his fingers down her belly and between her legs. He began rolling her already swollen bundle of nerves between his fingers, loving how her body responded instantly to his touch. Meredith arched her back to him and whimpered. "Screw foreplay, Derek. Just do it," she pleaded.

"Romantic," he teased, but still giving in to her. He thrust inside her and she immediately clenched around him. "Oh, Mer," he sighed.

Meredith bit her lip as she adjusted to him, then began rocking her hips back and forth. "Faster," she whispered, clutching his shoulders as he sped up his motions. Meredith swore she saw stars behind her eyelids as Derek made love to her, that's how incredible it was.

When he pulled one of her hardened nipples into his mouth, Meredith sucked in a breath. "Ah!" she whimpered.

Derek immediately withdrew from her, concerned that he'd hurt her. "Mer, you okay?" he asked worriedly.

Meredith clenched at the emptiness inside her, feeling bereft at the unexpected loss. "Yeah," she insisted, gently taking hold of him and guiding him back into her. "It's not that. Never that. My boobs. Just PMS-ing," she said, shrugging it off.

"Okay," Derek said softly, leaning down and kissing her. Meredith smiled and wrapped her legs around his waist as they resumed their movements. "Not hurting, right?" he asked.

She rolled her eyes playfully and laughed. "Farthest thing from that," Meredith assured him, gasping in pleasure as he changed his angle. "Holy crap!"

"Hmm..." Derek smirked.

When he slowed down dramatically, she gripped the sheets in frustration and panted. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Torturing you," he grinned naughtily, stilling completely and watching how she writhed beneath him.

"Derek, I'm horny as hell. Just do it," Meredith whined, pressing her fingertips against his back. He nearly pulled out completely before pushing back in again. Over and over and over. Moving so slowly that Meredith was fairly certain she might die from it all. "You're such an ass," she managed to laugh. When she squeezed around him, holding him in place, she looked up at her husband and smiled. "Now who's doing the torturing?"

Derek groaned and his shoulders shook as he tried to hold back from moving. Not that he could anyway, even if he tried, thanks to her death grip. "Truce," he begged.

"Hmm..." she pondered, running her fingers over her breasts and trailing her hand down in between them, stopping to stroke him where they were joined. "I don't know. This feels kinda good."

"Meredith, please?" he said, his voice strained and so pathetic that she had no choice but to give in.

"Fine," she whispered, releasing her hold on him. Derek immediately began thrusting in and out quickly, and Meredith pressed her hands against the headboard to keep from moving all around the bed. "Derek!" she gasped. "Harder!"

Rather than tease, and knowing it could get him in trouble, he started moving harder, causing them both to lose their breaths in a matter of seconds. Just as Meredith was sure she would die in mind blowing pleasure, Derek thrust deeply and she unexpectedly orgasmed around him. She screamed out in ecstasy and thrashed her head around on the pillow.

Derek kept moving inside her, determined for her to come again. "Again, Mer," he encouraged. "Come on, Meredith..." He stroked her with his thumb and like clockwork, she started right back into another one. Seconds later, Derek let go too. The feeling of him releasing inside her drove Meredith right over the edge to a third orgasm, her mind completely turned to mush by now. She saw nothing but bright lights and stars, unable to train her eyes on Derek's like she usually did. Not today, after what he'd just done to her body.

Neither of them spoke, or was able to speak, for minutes afterward. The aftershocks of her orgasm were still pulsing around him, and he couldn't bring himself to withdraw from her yet. Derek pressed kisses to her sweaty chest, heaving from the rigorous activity her body had been blissfully put through. "Oh..." Meredith panted. "...my God."

"That rivals our wedding night," Derek said, his face resting between her breasts.

"In the spirit of another wedding today, I guess it was appropriate," Meredith giggled. "I hope I'm able to walk down the aisle..."

Derek finally slipped out of her and dropped down next to her in bed. "Try explaining that one to the priest," he laughed.

"I'd make you do it." Meredith curled up next to him and kissed his cheek. "Love you, Der," she said softly.

"I love you, too," he said, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

She glanced over at the clock and sighed. "Iz wants me over at the house by eleven. I should get up."

"No," Derek chuckled, pinning her beneath him so she was trapped.

Meredith looked up at him and giggled. "I think if we had any more sex right now, I might actually die. And I'm the maid of honor. The maid of honor can't die on the bride's wedding day. That would be very mean," she pointed out.

"Hmm...fine," he relented, rolling off of her, but not letting her up until he kissed her again.

"Sex tonight. All night," she promised against his lips.

Derek smiled. "I can live with that."

She reluctantly got up out of bed, immediately missing the warmth of her husband. "I need to shower," she yawned.

"No shower sex?" he asked playfully.

"No," she said sternly, unable to suppress her smile as she walked naked into their bathroom.

Morning sex was definitely the best way to start the day off right.

--

"Alright, so I'll meet you at the Church," Meredith said, gathering up her make-up, dress, brush, and socks to dance in at the reception, because even the thought of wearing her heels all night gave her blisters.

"What am I supposed to do while you're gone?" he asked as she poured her tea into her travel mug.

"Write me a letter," she teased. "Remember to shave. Oh! Wear the dark red tie so we match in the pictures--Izzie's rule. Not mine. And bring their wedding gift. If I think of anything else, I'll call you," Meredith rattled off.

Derek nodded. "So why are you going this early?"

"I dunno," Meredith said, rolling her eyes. "Iz is making us breakfast and insisted on setting my hair in curlers. Apparently, she thinks I'd half-ass it if I did it myself," she giggled. "No guys allowed, or else I'd drag you with me."

"Where's Karev?"

Meredith bit her lip. "He slept in your office last night. Iz didn't want him to see her before the wedding, so I offered up our bed with the good mattress. I wanted him to have a good night sleep, maybe watch TV if he wanted to. Sleeping in an on-call room bed the night before your wedding? Not a good idea..."

Derek smiled at her generosity. It was little things like that that made it so easy to fall in love with her over and over again every day. "What?" she asked.

"Nothing," he shrugged. "That's just really nice of you to think of him, that's all."

"He's family," she said simply, walking around the counter and kissing him. "Alright, I should go. See you at one. Love you."

"Love you too," Derek said softly as they made their way to the front door. He hugged her quickly and kissed her temple. "Have fun," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled at her husband. "I will."

--

Meredith pulled into the driveway of her former home around ten thirty, hauling all of her stuff up to the front door and opening it with her elbow. "Iz?" she called out.

"In here," Izzie yelled back from the kitchen.

She draped her dress over the banister and walked into the kitchen, following the scent of hairspray and pancakes. "Hey," Meredith greeted. "Happy wedding day, Iz," she smiled.

"Thanks," Izzie grinned, flipping the pancakes on the griddle, her hair already adorned with thick pink curlers. "I'm trying to stay calm, which is why I'm cooking. Hungry?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, taking a seat at the counter. "And don't be nervous. The day I married Derek was one of the calmest days of my life. Everything fell into place and it was just...perfect," she sighed, recalling the day Derek officially became her husband. "And not cheesy perfect, but really, actually, perfect."

"Yeah?" Izzie asked with a small smile.

"Yeah," Meredith echoed. "It was. Alex loves you, and this is going to be one of the greatest days of your life," she said as she felt the tears well up in her eyes.

Izzie wiped away her own tears and smiled. "Thank you, Mer."

"So Cristina isn't here yet?"

"Nope, not yet," Izzie shook her head. "Should be here soon."

"Here now," Cristina corrected as she appeared in the doorway. "Morning," she yawned.

"Morning," Meredith and Izzie said in unison.

Cristina noticed their glossy eyes and rolled her own. "Oh God, I'm glad I missed the crying."

"Shut up," Meredith giggled. "It's a happy day."

"Happy, right," Cristina said, putting on her cheekiest smile. "Okay then."

"Pancake?" Izzie asked them.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. sure."

Once Meredith was settled in with her food, Izzie seized her chance and began setting her hair in the curlers. Every time she sprayed the hairspray, Meredith groaned. "Iz, lay off on that stuff a little. I'm trying to eat," she giggled. "And it's making me dizzy."

"It needs to be sprayed or the curls won't hold all day," Izzie insisted. "Now hold still."

Meredith let out a sigh and munched on her blueberry pancake. She had no choice but to give in to the bride. That's what a good maid of honor did. Even if it meant she should probably be wearing a gas mask.

By the time all three of them had their hair set in curlers, it was nearly eleven thirty. Next up on Izzie's list was make-up, followed by dresses, then out the door to the church. A checklist of girly wedding requisites that Izzie insisted upon completing.

"What do you use on your skin?" Izzie asked as Meredith applied her mascara in the bathroom mirror.

"It's called orgasm. I had three this morning. Hence, the sex glow," Meredith giggled, causing Cristina to sigh from her place on the ledge of the bathtub, as she waited for the mirror.

Izzie's eyes widened. "_Three_? You guys had sex _three_ times this morning? Meredith, seriously, how are you able to walk?"

"One round of sex," Meredith corrected.

"Is that even possible?" Cristina asked in disbelief.

Meredith capped her mascara lid and shrugged. "I'm telling you, it's true. Derek's penis is my favorite thing ever."

"Holy crap," Izzie said.

"Just one of the many things about him that makes me happy. I attribute the good skin to him," Meredith smiled as she lathered her lips with chapstick.

"And I attribute my sudden need to vomit to him, too," Cristina groaned.

Meredith smirked at her two friends as she exited the bathroom to go put her dress on. "Jealous..." she said in a sing song voice, glancing back and sticking her tongue out at them. She walked into her old bedroom and looked around for a few moments before moving. It was Alex and Izzie's room now, but still, it felt like hers. Or more specifically, hers and Derek's. She'd only been sleeping in that room for a few nights when Derek came along, and then, suddenly, it was their bedroom.

She smiled to herself. Her one night stand that moved into her bedroom, fell in love with her, and vowed to spend a lifetime. It was funny how life worked out sometimes.

--

Derek stood in the back of the church, waiting for his wife to arrive with her friends. The wedding was in T-minus thirty minutes when they pulled up to the church in Meredith's car. Upon entering, he smiled. "Congratulations, Izzie," he said sincerely.

Izzie smiled back. "Thanks," she said. "Did you see Alex?"

"Yep. Karev and O'Malley both accounted for," he nodded. "And Lexie, and Bailey, and the Chief, and half the hospital staff..." Derek joked.

"Good," Izzie laughed.

Meredith hung back in the vestibule while Cristina and Izzie went into one of the dressing rooms. She smiled, wrapping her arms around Derek's neck and kissing him. "You look very handsome," she said softly.

"Wore the red tie," he grinned, his arms moving around her waist. "Your boobs look huge in this dress," Derek grinned.

Meredith looked down at her chest and sighed. "I know. Damn seamstress underestimated my boob measurements, so now I look like a porn star," she giggled.

"Nothing to complain about," he winked. "I'm wholly looking forward to taking it off of you tonight."

"I'm looking forward to letting you," Meredith added.

"Damn, Grey. How much for a lap dance?" Mark asked with a grin as he and Bridget entered the church.

Meredith gasped and Derek just laughed. "Okay, first of all, your girlfriend is standing right next to you. And second, I'm wearing a push up bra in a tight dress. Not my fault," she explained.

Bridget nudged Mark's arm and rolled her eyes. "Don't listen to him. You look gorgeous."

"And so do you," Meredith complimented.

"See you in there," Bridget smiled, taking Mark's hand as they walked into the double doors to find a seat.

Meredith smoothed out the shoulders of Derek's suit jacket and kissed him again. "Whose side are you sitting on?" she asked him.

"Dunno yet. I guess the bride's so I can stare at the maid of honor the whole time," Derek grinned, pressing a kiss to her neck.

"In church," Bailey reminded them as she passed by on her way to the bathroom, decked out in her dress and heels. "Keep it G-rated."

Derek and Meredith both laughed at their unfortunate timing, and Meredith glanced at his watch. "Alright, I should go check on Iz and Cristina. See you in there. And _do not_ make me laugh during the ceremony," she warned, much to Derek's amusement. "I mean it, Derek. I will kick your ass."

"I won't," he assured her. "Go. Do girly wedding things. I'll meet outside afterward," Derek said, getting in another kiss before she headed for the dressing room.

Meredith squeezed his hand and smiled. "Okay."

--

The wedding ceremony was underway, and as Alex and Izzie read their vows and said their I do's, Meredith was focusing on the number of flower petals in Alex's lapel, counting the candles on the altar, doing anything she could do distract herself from the fact that she thought she might pee herself. She was cursing herself for not going to the bathroom after drinking an entire mug's worth of tea this morning, and then some orange juice with breakfast. _Stupid. Stupid. Stupid_, she chanted to herself.

She glanced over at Derek who was sitting in the pews next to Mark and Bridget, and noticed how he seemed to know something was wrong. He could read any and all of her facial expressions, and he looked to her worriedly. "You okay?" he mouthed.

Meredith nodded inconspicuously, tapping her toes in her heels, wishing she could telepathically yell at the priest to wrap things up. Luckily, moments later, the pianist began with the closing procession, and Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. She put a smile on her face, and with Cristina and George in toe, followed them back up the aisle, amid the clapping and cheering coming from those around them.

As soon as Meredith was in the back of the church, she was gracious enough to wait until family and friends filed out onto the front steps for pictures before grabbing Derek from the crowd and pulling him towards the restroom. "Mer, are you okay?" Derek asked, letting her grab him by his sleeve into the bathroom.

"I'm about three seconds away from peeing myself. Here. Hold these," she said frantically, thrusting her flower arrangement at him. "I need you to hold my dress up. And don't look," Meredith said.

Instead of asking further questions, Derek just did the job of a dutiful husband and granted her request, holding her flowers under his arm and moving her dress out of the way for her while she peed. "Is this why you were practically dancing on the altar?" Derek asked, his hands over his eyes.

"Yes," Meredith replied, calmness coming over her as she emptied her bladder. "I forgot to pee before the ceremony because I'm stupid."

"And you're still going..." Derek pointed out, amused.

"Don't look!" Meredith gasped.

Derek rolled his eyes beneath his closed lids and laughed. "I'm not. I can hear you," he said. "Damn, how much did you drink?"

"Just tea and orange juice," Meredith said, discreetly wiping, pulling her panties back up, and flushing. "Okay, I'm done."

He let go of the dress so it fell back into place, and held onto her flowers until she had the chance to wash and dry her hands. "Feel better?"

"Yeah," Meredith breathed, tossing her paper towel into the trash can. "Thank you," she smiled.

"You're welcome," Derek said softly before kissing her forehead.

"Bet you never thought you'd have to do that," Meredith giggled as they headed for the front doors of the church.

Derek held her hand as they descended the steps so she wouldn't fall. "Nothing surprises me anymore," he chuckled. "Not when it comes to you."

"I'm flattered, thanks," she smirked. Izzie was waving her over to take pictures with the wedding party, which consisted of their group of five. Derek stood next to Bailey as picture after picture was taken, all of them at the mercy of the photographer who made them smile for well over a half hour.

"Look at that..." Bailey said as she and Derek hung back and waited.

"Hmm?" Derek asked.

"They're...grown up," she said simply. "Makes me proud."

"You should be," Derek concurred. "They're a good bunch."

Bailey laughed. "They drive me crazy..." she added. "But yeah, they are."

"Meredith, too?" Derek asked in disbelief.

"When you're giving her a hickey in the back of a church, I don't know what to think," she teased.

"I was just kissing her," Derek defended himself.

"Mmhmm..."

Derek laughed. "What? I was."

--

Meredith and Derek arrived at the reception hall around five thirty, with all the others. Alex's family, Izzie's family, hospital family. Izzie was kind enough to seat the wedding party at a round table, where they could all eat together, instead of putting them all in a row on a stage, which Meredith would have found mortifying. And this way, she got to sit with her husband, and he could hold her crap in his suit pockets. That's what good husbands did.

"This place is nice," George complimented as he looked around. "How exactly did you afford this?" he asked Alex and Izzie.

"My sister owns the catering company, so we got all the food for free. And everything else, we sacrificed months' worth of paychecks for," Alex sighed amusedly.

Izzie smiled at him. "But it's perfect," she said softly, glancing over at Meredith as she recalled what she'd told her earlier.

"It really is," Meredith agreed, smiling back at her.

"Congratulations," Derek said as he reached for his wine glass and held it up in the air. The others followed suit, and they toasted the newly married couple.

After the table branched off into their own little conversations, and the soup and salad was served, Derek pressed a kiss to Meredith's cheek and she leaned into him. "Our wedding was a fraction of a fraction of this one," she giggled.

"Hmm..." Derek hummed. "With our expansive guest list of fifteen people."

"It was beautiful," Meredith said softly, taking a spoonful of her soup.

"Best day of my life...well, so far. And there's been pretty damn perfect ones since then, too," Derek said.

"Yeah," Meredith agreed. "I think so, too."

After dinner had been served, the cake had been cut, speeches had been given, and more toasts had been made by family and friends, Meredith looked to her husband and smiled. "Should we give them their gift?"

"Yeah," Derek grinned. He grabbed the envelope from his coat pocket and handed it to her.

"Hey, could we talk to you guys for a sec?" Meredith asked, patting Alex's shoulder.

Izzie nodded and the two got up from the table. Meredith and Derek led them over to a quieter spot off to the side, near the wedding cake. "This is for you," Meredith said, handing them a white envelope with their names on it.

Alex accepted it and looked to them curiously before breaking the tab and opening it. He pulled out a few sheets of paper and he and Izzie looked over them. "What--what is this?" she asked.

"The deed to the house," was all Meredith said.

Izzie looked to them, wide eyed and speechless as she waited for either one of them to explain. "Huh?"

"It's yours...if you want it. Our gift to you," Derek nodded.

Alex released a breath and stared at the papers in his hand, and tears gathered in both of their eyes. "But..." Izzie sputtered, unable to find her words.

"You made it a home for all of us, Iz. For me and for George. And for Derek. And Alex. And we want you to have it. It's been in my family since it was built, and I couldn't sell it to strangers. You love that house, and there's no one else I'd want it to go to other than you guys," Meredith said graciously, taking Derek's hand and squeezing it.

"Meredith," Izzie breathed. "I don't even know what to...oh my God."

"Are you serious? We can just have it?" Alex asked in disbelief, running his hand through his short hair.

"Yes," Meredith laughed. "That's why it's a gift."

"Mer and I, we thought about it for a while. And it's--we don't need the money," Derek said, hoping it didn't sound pretentious. "And, well, we all know the crappy salary of a resident, so we wanted this to be a weight off your shoulders."

A tear trailed from Izzie's eye and she smiled. "Thank you," she gasped. "Oh my God."

Alex looked to Izzie and mirrored the smile on his wife's face. "Is this the time when the Punk'd cameras pop out of the cake, or is this really happening?" he asked, the levity and happiness evident in his voice.

"Not a joke," Derek laughed. "We promise."

Meredith looked to her friends, who were like her brother and sister and smiled at them. "Happy wedding day," she said softly.

Unable to resist any longer, Izzie outstretched her arms and gathered both Meredith and Derek in for a hug. She squeezed them so tight that Meredith's breath caught in her throat; she smiled anyway. "We love you guys," she said, hugging Izzie back.

"Thank you, Mer," Alex said when those two eventually hugged too.

She patted his back gently. "You're welcome."

"I promise we'll take care of it," Izzie said as Alex shook Derek's hand in gratitude.

Meredith smiled. "You always have; that's why we want you to have it."

"Thank you," Izzie and Alex repeated in union as they stood there, hands clasped tightly together.

Cristina and George were looking on a little in the distance, wondering what the hell was going on, so rather than be discreet any longer, Izzie decided to fill them in. "They gave us the house!" she shouted excitedly, tears still pooled in her eyes, as she waved the papers in the air.

"You what?" Cristina asked.

"They're family," Derek shrugged, wrapping his arms around Meredith's waist as they walked back to the table.

Meredith giggled at his simple response as she pulled her heels off and grabbed her socks from Derek's pocket. "No one can top that gift," she joked, using Derek's shoulder for leverage while putting them on.

"Doubt it," Derek agreed.

"Wanna dance with me?" Meredith asked her husband, smiling at him.

He grinned back at her and took her hand. "Sure."

They walked onto the hardwood dance floor, finding a spot with a nice little space cushion from the others who danced around them. Meredith wrapped her arms around Derek's neck and pressed her lips to his. "Love you," she whispered.

Derek smiled and pulled her closer. "I love you, too. So much," he said, breathing her in as they swayed back and forth to the music under the low lighting of the dance floor. He buried his nose into her curls, which were starting to relax a little, so they rested gently on her bare shoulders. She looked beautiful.

Meredith closed her eyes and brushed her cheek against Derek's, enjoying the time spent with her husband. It had been a long, eventful, fun day, and getting the chance to be with Derek was always a good way to soak in the day, whether dancing with him at a wedding, or relaxing with him in their bed.

It was a while before either of them said anything, and when Meredith did, she spoke quietly. "Der?" she whispered.

"Hmm?" he asked.

"I think I might be pregnant," she said, tears burning her eyes as soon as the words came out.

Derek pulled back immediately and tilted his head at his wife, his mind barely able to comprehend what she'd just said. "What?"

Meredith bit her lip as she tried to keep her tears at bay, but with no success. "Yeah," she confessed as one slipped over her eyelid.

"Meredith," he breathed. "Oh my God." His heart pounded wildly in his chest and he took her hand, leading them to a completely vacant area of the reception hall. "I...wait. Yeah?"

"I dunno. I think I might be," she said softly. "I didn't want to say anything and get our hopes up, but it's...my period is nine days late, and then..." Meredith pointed to her chest. "Last time I tried this dress on, my boobs were _not _this big, and they're kinda sore. And I've been peeing a lot lately and I've been weird around certain foods. Today, Iz said my skin looked really glowy and..." she rambled nervously.

A smile came over Derek's face that reached his eyes and he released a shaky breath. "Meredith..."

"I just...I feel different," she said, dabbing her fingers under her eyes and hoping her mascara wasn't running down her cheeks. "Last time I thought I might be pregnant, I didn't _feel_ pregnant. But this time, I kinda do, which is crazy, but I just...I really think we might have done it this time, Derek."

Derek pulled Meredith into his arms and she leaned into her husband's embrace. "You okay?" she asked.

"Thrilled. Nervous. Shocked," he chuckled with tears in his eyes.

Meredith ran a hand through her hair and let out a breath. "All week, I've been waiting for my period. But nine days is--I couldn't keep it to myself any longer," she explained.

Derek pressed a kiss to her forehead and brushed a few tears from her face. "So, uh, do you wanna take a test?"

"How?" Meredith asked.

He checked his watch. "It's almost eleven. Do you think we could sneak out early?"

"Yeah, uh..." she said, biting her lip as she thought. "The only thing left now is dancing, so we're not going to miss anything too important. I'll just tell Iz we have to go home because Charlie's been there alone most of the day. She won't mind if we leave."

"Okay," Derek agreed. He dropped his hands in his suit pockets and exhaled deeply. They'd gone through the disappointment of a negative test before, so he was trying not to set himself up for that again, but even still, he could practically hear his heart beating in his ears with the adrenaline rush. Again. Just like before, things would either stay the same or they would change forever. The anticipation was almost too much to bear.

Within minutes, he and Meredith were driving down the road, going as quickly as they could without breaking the law. The whole time, Derek held her hand in his. She rubbed her thumb along his knuckles then brought his whole hand to her lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. "Der, what if it's negative?" she asked, pulling his suit jacket over her shoulders.

Derek pursed his lips and thought for a moment. "Remember when you asked me back in May, what we'd do if it was positive?" he said.

"Yeah."

"We ended up trying for a baby. And we kept trying. And we'll _keep_ trying, that's all. Power of optimism, right?" Derek managed to laugh.

She smiled wryly at her husband. "Since when have you known me to be an optimist?"

"Just try it," he chuckled. "You might surprise yourself."

Meredith leaned her head against the headrest and took in a deep breath, asking herself when she became the girl that hoped and prayed for a baby, and attempted to see the silver lining, even when it wasn't easy. Then she looked at the person next to her. And she knew. _Derek._

The minute Derek pulled into their driveway, he cut the engine, Meredith gathered up her heels from the car floor, and they walked toward the front door, hand in hand. He squeezed and she squeezed back. "Let's just see what it says once you take it. No biggie," he reminded her. Only, it was. No matter how much they tried to keep calm.

"Right, yeah," Meredith agreed softly.

They walked upstairs toward the bathroom attached to their bedroom, and Derek tossed his tie on top of the bed while she put her heels back in her closet. "I need you to hold my dress again," she giggled.

"Okay," Derek said, following her into the bathroom.

Meredith felt her hands shaking as she reached into the cabinet under the sink for one of the pregnancy tests Cristina had kindly stolen from the clinic for them. She pulled out the white and blue box and tore open the cardboard. When she retrieved the test from inside, she looked to Derek and let out a shaky breath. She hadn't been this nervous since...ever.

"Mer, relax," Derek said calmly, running his fingers up and down her arm.

"Trying," she replied. "Alright, here." Meredith reached for the bottom of her dress and handed it to Derek. Just like earlier, he held it and turned his head away. She pulled her panties down and smiled at her husband, who had done more than his fair share of husbandly tasks today. "I honestly don't even care if you look at this point. I lost all my modesty this afternoon."

"Even still," Derek shrugged, laughing. "I'll keep my eyes on the shower."

By some stroke of luck, Meredith managed to pee on the stick. Step one, completed. Afterward, she handed it to Derek before washing her hands off. "How long?" Derek asked.

"Five minutes," Meredith said.

Déjà vu of the last time they did this crossed both of their minds, and Derek nodded. "Okay."

They walked into their bedroom and he set the test on his nightstand, glancing at the clock for the time. _11:39_. The countdown began.

Meredith dropped back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling, arms crossed under her head. Derek's eyes were immediately drawn to her belly and he stared at it. Hoping. Waiting. "If you're pregnant, you're probably a month or two along already," Derek thought out loud.

"June baby," Meredith whispered, smiling up at the ceiling. "Maybe May."

"Hmm," Derek hummed. The urge to reach out and place his hand over her belly came over him, but he resisted. Somehow he felt like that was tempting fate, because there was a chance there was no baby in there. "I take back what I said before."

She turned her head and looked at him. "What?"

"About how nothing surprises me when it comes to you," he grinned. "_This_. This surprised the hell out of me."

"I just figured that if I told you I was late and then I got it...I just didn't want _both_ of us to be disappointed again. If I could spare you that, I wanted to. But nine days...it's never been nine days late before," Meredith said.

_11:42_.

"I'm not mad," Derek assured her. "I would have dipped you down and kissed you right on the dance floor if it wouldn't have made a scene," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled. "You can kiss me now."

He laid down next to her and cupped her cheek in his palm. "Okay," he whispered, kissing her with everything he had. Meredith moaned against his lips, her body prickling with that tingly, shiny heat that only he could give her. Right then, baby or no baby, she was grateful just to have him. Forever, he was hers. And she was his.

He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. The energy in the room was all around them. Hearts pounding in their chests. Heightened nerves. Passion. Love.

_11:44_.

"Time," Meredith breathed. She sat up in bed, her satiny red dress pooling all around her, and took the test off the nightstand. She linked her other arm through Derek's and took a deep, calming breath before pulling off the results tab, her heart beating faster than it had in the entirety of her life. Meredith forgot to breathe when she saw what was looking back at her. Positive. Bright blue and clear as day. Undoubtedly. Positive. "Positive," she choked out, tears racing from her eyes and leaving tiny water droplets all over her dress. "Derek."

"Mer," he let out in a breath. "Oh my God, Meredith." Derek wrapped his arms around his wife and she felt his own tears splash onto her bare shoulders. "Meredith," he repeated. He chanted her name over and over again in his brain. Meredith. Baby. Positive. Love. Daddy. Mommy. Meredith. Meredith. Meredith, like a recurring prayer in his mind.

Meredith looked to her husband and laughed, as the tears still fell from her eyes freely and without pause. "There's..." she began, placing her hand protectively over her belly, her mommy instincts kicking in immediately and forever. "We made a baby."

"We did," he repeated, gently placing his hand over hers. "God, I'm so in love with you," Derek whispered.

"Who?" she giggled.

Derek's heart fluttered in his chest. There were three people in the room. A family of three. The love for their child there in an instant. Unconditionally and forever. The reality was indescribable. "Both of you," he laughed through his crying.

"I love you both, too." Meredith hugged her husband again, their baby between them, and buried her face in his neck. "I love you both so much."

"You know how I said our wedding was the happiest day of my life so far?" Derek asked.

Meredith kissed his neck, her own tears completely seeped through his white dress shirt. "And now?"

Derek rocked her back and forth in his arms, soaking in the feeling of unconditional love he had for his wife and their baby, safe inside her. He smiled widely. "This just topped it."


	74. First Ultrasound

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's, nor do I own the information referenced in this chapter in regards to the pregnancy. The websites own that info. I'm just borrowing it.**

**Yes, Meredith is really pregnant. And because a MerDer baby is my biggest wish for the show, I'm going to write to my heart's content (I literally have pages upon pages of notes and ideas), about everything. Pregnancy, birth, parenthood, all of that. I hope you'll come along for the ride. :)**

Derek lifted up his sleeping wife's tee shirt and pressed a kiss to her belly. It was still early, and normally, on a day off, he'd be sleeping, too. But today was the day Meredith had her first doctor's appointment since they found out she was pregnant, and he couldn't focus on anything else. If being pregnant didn't make her so tired, Derek knew she would probably be awake. But apparently, their baby was calling all the shots, from what she ate to how much she slept. Over the past week, he'd noticed how she was starting to look a little fuller, not pouchy yet, just...different. And glowy, and beautiful. And he loved every second of it.

"I love you," he whispered quietly, giving her belly another kiss before moving up her body to kiss her lips. "And I love you."

Meredith's eyelids opened slowly, and she smiled against her husband's lips. "Hmm..." she hummed sleepily. "What are you doing?"

"Saying good morning," Derek grinned. He brushed some waves of hair from her face and Meredith wiped the sleep from her eyes.

"Good morning." She splayed her fingers over her stomach, like she'd been doing nearly every minute of every day for a week. "Today's the day," she said.

"I can't wait," Derek said softly. He lifted her shirt up again and kissed around her belly button a few times, causing Meredith to giggle.

"How many times have you kissed my stomach in the past five days?" she asked.

Derek grinned, without shame. "Millions. And that's not stopping any time soon."

"Good," she smiled back. Eventually, she knew it would become annoying, but for now, it was kind of adorable. The Daddy in him was already in full swing.

"How're you feeling today?" he asked curiously, lying back in the bed with her. "Nauseous? Hungry? I can make you something..."

"I feel good. A little bloaty, but not too nauseous." She smiled and looked down at the still flat plane of her abdomen. "Mostly, I'm just happy."

He nuzzled his nose into her neck and breathed her in. "Me too."

"I'm tired," she yawned.

"Baby wants you to sleep, huh?" Derek asked with a chuckle.

Meredith nodded, rolling over and spooning against her husband, both of their hands finding their way to her belly like a magnet. "I love you," she whispered.

Derek kissed the back of his wife's head. "I love you, too."

--

They arrived at the doctor's office promptly at one o'clock, opting to have their appointment in Meredith's personal OB/GYN's office, instead of going to Seattle Grace. Her doctor, Dr. Halloran, was an obstetrician that worked at the hospital, and after they told their friends that they were expecting, it would be more convenient to just schedule appointments where they worked, but for now, they just wanted to keep it between them.

After filling out piles of paperwork, and reviewing the medical histories of both of their families, they were finally taken back to an exam room. As she hopped up onto the table in her hospital gown, the paper drape beneath her bottom crinkled, and she swung her legs back and forth nervously.

Derek smirked at his wife, hoping he could ease her jitters. "You look cute in a hospital gown," he chuckled.

"Haha," Meredith said wryly. "Funny guy."

"Remember the last time you were panty-less in a gown on an exam table?" Derek asked, flashing her an amused grin. "That was fun."

Meredith shook her head and laughed. "Okay, if you ever want to look at what the doctor is about to look at, ever again, shut up. Now," she joked.

Derek got up from the chair against the wall and walked over to her. "Nothing to be nervous about," he assured her, taking her hand.

"Easy for you to say. You're the guy. No one pokes and prods you," Meredith giggled. "All you have to do is knock me up."

"You know I'm grateful," he whispered into her hair before kissing the top of her head. "And I love you."

Meredith leaned into her husband and let out a contented sigh. "I know."

Dr. Laurie Halloran, a woman with brown hair and a friendly face knocked twice, then entered the room, smiling at the two of them. "Long time, no see," she joked, having just seen them a few minutes beforehand when they reviewed their medical histories. She set Meredith's chart down on the desk and began washing her hands. "I know you were in here for a visit back in May, but I'd like to do a quick pelvic exam, just to make sure everything is looking good, then we'll take a look at your baby. We should be able to see the heartbeat today," Dr. Halloran told them.

"Okay," Meredith nodded, squeezing Derek's hand in anticipation. He squeezed back and didn't let go. This was a team effort, and he planned on being there every step of the way.

Once Meredith was situated and Dr. Halloran began the exam, she kept up the conversation to make Meredith more comfortable. "I know it's still early, but are you noticing anything yet, as far as signs or symptoms...changes in appetite or physical appearance?"

Meredith nodded, one hand draped over her belly. "I think I'm starting to fill out a little," she managed to giggle. "No cravings yet. Peeing a lot."

"That's good. Your uterus is expanding and making room for when the baby grows, which puts pressure on the bladder," she said encouragingly. "Not that you weren't aware of that, being surgeons. Technically, we're all co-workers," Dr. Halloran laughed.

Derek chuckled, too. "Eventually, we'll switch over to having appointments at Seattle Grace. But it's still early, so we want to wait a few weeks before making anything public," Derek explained, his hand still holding onto Meredith's.

"Oh, not a problem. I completely understand," she nodded. "Just let me know when you wanted to switch, and we can schedule visits over there."

"Okay," Meredith agreed.

"So how far along do you think you are?"

"Well, my last period was in late August, so I'm guessing around seven weeks or so." She looked up at Derek and smiled when he nodded in confirmation.

"Based on the look and positioning of your cervix, I'd say that's about right," Dr. Halloran concurred.

"So everything looks good?" Derek asked hopefully, trailing his fingers along Meredith's arm.

"It does," she nodded. "Now for the fun part."

Meredith turned her head to Derek and smiled. Seeing their baby for the first time. Even though he or she was no bigger than a nickel. It was thrilling. Derek bent down and kissed her forehead. "Ready?" he asked softly.

"Yeah," Meredith breathed, trying to keep her tears at bay as the anticipation got the best of her.

"At this stage of pregnancy, an internal ultrasound will give us a much better detail of everything inside, and we should be able to see exactly what's going on. Is that okay?" Dr. Halloran asked.

Meredith nodded, just eager to see what they'd created together. "Yeah, that's fine," she replied.

After setting up the equipment and inserting the transducer, Dr. Halloran flicked on the monitor, and blobby 3-D images appeared on the screen. "Okay," she began. "Here's your cervix. Above it is your uterus. Normally, it's the size of a fist, but every day, it expands. See how it's starting to push against your bladder?" she pointed.

Meredith and Derek studied the screen carefully, taking in everything. They'd both administered ultrasounds before, but now, being on the other side, was a completely different experience. Now, it was more than just a bunch of organs. Their baby was in there. "Yeah," Meredith said.

"Ovaries and tubes look good. Everything is very healthy," she nodded encouragingly. "Okay, I'll zoom in now for the main attraction," Dr. Halloran laughed, pressing a few buttons and clicking the mouse to focus in on Meredith's uterus. "Alright, here we are..."

A small but prominent little human in a sea of black flashed over the screen, and the minute they saw it, tears flooded both of their eyes. "Der," Meredith whispered.

"Here's the embryonic sac," the doctor pointed. "It's implanted on the right side of the uterus." Dr. Halloran turned to them and smiled. "Congratulations, there's definitely a healthy, viable embryo in here."

Meredith reached up with the hand that Derek wasn't holding and gently pulled his head toward her so she could kiss him. Derek pressed his lips to hers, their tears mingling as their cheeks brushed. "I love you," Meredith whimpered.

Derek smiled widely as happy tears fell from his eyes. "I love you, too," he echoed.

"Here's the head. Good size, too," Dr. Halloran pointed. "And the back and the bottom, which lead into these tiny little legs and feet." She traced her finger over the monitor and smiled. "Little arm buds, waving at you. Looks happy and healthy to me."

"Oh my God," Meredith whispered, and an even more overwhelming sense of love flooding over her as she watched their baby from the inside. It was incredible.

Derek brushed the tears away on his face and raised Meredith's hand to his lips. "Thank you, Meredith," he said, nothing but genuine gratitude and euphoria present in his voice.

"And here's the heartbeat. It's too early to hear it, but you can definitely see it." Dr. Halloran focused in solely on the embryo and an even clearer image of their baby came over the monitor. "See the white flicker?"

"Oh my God," Derek gasped in awe, running a hand through his hair. "Look at that."

"You're about seven to eight weeks along. Heartbeat is very strong for this short period of gestation, which is great. About one hundred fifty beats per minute," Dr. Halloran explained.

Meredith couldn't do anything but stare at the screen in front of her. It was like she forgot how to speak and could only watch. The constant, rapid _thud-thud-thud _flickering on the screen was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

Their baby. The one made out of love. Their true-to-life little son or daughter inside of her. If miracles existed, that was it.

She let out a breath and wiped away her tears with the sides of her fingers. "Oh my God," Meredith murmured. She could watch it forever.

"I'll print you plenty of pictures," the doctor offered. "Would you like a video on DVD, as well?"

"Yes, please," they answered immediately, in sync.

"Okay." She patted Meredith's knee as a signal that she could sit up now and smiled. "I'll be right back."

As soon as the door clicked shut, Meredith reached for Derek and he wrapped his arms tightly around her. "We really did it," she said, the wonderment and thrill of it all spiraling around them.

Derek ran his hand up and down her back, dropping his head down on her shoulder. "I can't even..." he stammered. "Wow."

"Oh God." Meredith let out a shaky breath and let the tears flow freely down her face. "We made a person, Derek," she said in disbelief, trying to wrap her mind around the enormity.

He looked from his wife in front of him to the freeze-framed image of their baby on the screen and grinned widely. "We really did."

Dr. Halloran entered the room again, holding a stack of photos and a square case with their DVD inside. She handed them to Meredith and smiled. "These are for you."

"Thank you," Meredith said graciously.

"My pleasure," she replied. "So based on my measurements and the number of days since your last period, I would estimate that you conceived around September fifth, give or take a few days, which means your due date is May 29th."

Meredith smiled and placed her hand over her gown-covered belly. "Okay."

"And everything is good, right? Healthy?" Derek double-checked, absentmindedly running his fingers down his wife's back.

Dr. Halloran smiled reassuringly. "Everything is perfect. Just keep doing what you're doing. Getting enough folic acid, drinking plenty of water. Limit strenuous activity. Maybe try to cut back on work hours, if you can. I know that's easier said than done, but doing so, even just a little bit, will really help with the fatigue," she explained. "Morning sickness will probably be showing up soon, and cravings too. If you notice a little, light spotting, don't panic. It's completely normal. And sex is absolutely fine, just nothing too rough or jostling."

"Okay," Meredith responded with a nod.

"Don't hesitate to call, ever. And I'll see you in a few weeks. We might even be able to hear the heartbeat next time," she said, patting Meredith's shoulder kindly. "And congratulations to both of you."

Derek kissed the top of Meredith's head as pure relief and joy washed over him, and she leaned into him. "Thank you."

This was better than any high surgery could ever offer.

--

Meredith watched as Derek stood in front of the fridge, and proudly clipped one of their ultrasound pictures to it with a magnet. The smiles hadn't left either of their faces all day, and they were fighting the urge to shout their news from the rooftops.

She wrapped her arms around him from behind and hugged her husband. "Our first baby picture," she smiled happily as they both looked at their baby. Half him, half her. The tiny little miracle that they were completely in love with.

"Hmm..." Derek hummed, a perpetual grin on his face. "Our baby is beautiful."

"I think so, too," she whispered into his neck and then kissed him there. They continued staring at the picture for a few moments before Meredith spoke. "Do you wanna call your mom?"

Derek turned around. "We can wait if you want. It's up to you," he shrugged.

She smiled, running her fingers through his hair. "She's your mom. She'd want to know," Meredith said.

"It's not tempting fate?" he asked.

"We can't think like that, Derek," she said softly, playing with the curls on the back of his neck. "This baby is safe and sound inside me, and I'm not gonna let anything bad happen. Mommy instincts, remember?"

Hearing Meredith call herself a mommy gave him goosebumps, and she felt chills run over his body. "God, I love you," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"And I love you," Meredith said before standing on her tiptoes to kiss him. "And our baby." She brought her hand down to rest on her belly and Derek placed his hand on top.

"We can call her tonight. I'm sure she's probably busy with the grandkids right now," Derek chuckled. Meredith's confidence put him at ease, and he found himself letting go a little of the fear he'd had. He had always been protective of Meredith, but now that she was carrying their child, he felt even more responsible for both of them.

"I'm sure she'll be ecstatic to find out that number sixteen is on the way," Meredith smiled at him.

Derek's heart caught in his throat just thinking of how his mother would react. The fact that her only son's wife was pregnant--that she was finally getting a grandchild from them--was going to thrill her. "I'm sure she will."

She gently squeezed his hand. "I'm hungry," Meredith said, wondering how long it would take for Derek to respond. She was pretty sure that he'd be willing to go to the ends of the earth to fulfill her food wishes.

"What would you like?" he asked immediately. "I'll cook you something."

She smiled sweetly at her husband, then giggled. "I'm so milking this for the next seven months..."

"Taking advantage of me?" Derek smirked, opening the fridge and searching for something he could make for her. "How about cheeseburgers? Or chicken? Steak? We could order pizza..." he rattled off.

"I'm kinda in the mood for French toast." Meredith bit her lip and pondered. "But a cheeseburger sounds good, too."

"French toast and cheeseburgers, coming right up," he grinned, kissing her temple before grabbing the frying pan off the rack above the island.

Meredith laughed. "You don't have to make both. We can agree on something."

Derek looked to her as he cracked eggs into a bowl, an amused expression on his face. "_You_ are my pregnant wife. I'll do anything for you, even cook two meals."

"Will you at least let me help?" Meredith asked, as she grabbed the peanut butter jar. She sat down at the island and took a heaping spoonful into her mouth.

"Peanut butter craving?" Derek assumed, smiling.

She glanced down at the jar in her hand then looked back up at him. "A little, yeah," Meredith confessed, a slight, embarrassed blush shading her cheeks.

"I love pregnant you," he chuckled.

Meredith ran her hand over her belly again. It had already become second nature to her, her way of letting their baby know he or she was safe. Loved. "Good, because I kind of love this whole pregnant thing."

--

"So..." Derek began. "What were we doing around September fifth?"

The two sat on the couch with their wide array of food choices, including the jar of peanut butter, which Meredith was sporadically spreading on her French toast. The first little wave of cravings had definitely kicked in. "Each other, obviously," Meredith giggled.

He laughed and took another bite of his cheeseburger. "I'm trying to pinpoint the sex we had, so we know how to do it to make the next kid," he winked at her.

"Well, the fifth was a Saturday," Meredith said. "So it's very possible that we had sex multiple times that day..."

"True. Days off usually involve marathon sex," he smirked, watching as she dipped a fry in syrup and popped it into her mouth.

"Oh God, that's good. Why didn't I try that before?" Meredith asked rhetorically. "Here. Try one. It's salty _and_ sweet," she said excitedly.

Derek had no choice but to accept the fry, and was surprised that it actually wasn't terrible dipped in the syrup. "Not bad," he agreed.

"It could have been that Friday night. Or Sunday," Meredith pointed out. "We have a lot of sex, huh?" she giggled.

"Yes, we do," he agreed amusedly. "Well, at least we know the baby was conceived in our bed. Or at least our house."

"And not at the hospital?" she laughed. "So am I. We have a lot of sex there, too."

"That we do," Derek said. He reached for his drink on the end table and noticed the Pregnancy Week by Week book sitting on top of the TV Guide. Derek grabbed it and smiled. "Wanna read up on what's happening in the world of your uterus?" he asked with a chuckle.

Meredith took her French toast and cheeseburger plate and set it on her lap, sidling up against her husband. "I do," she said softly.

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulders then began reading. "During the seventh week of pregnancy, your baby will grow tremendously, reaching the size of a large blueberry. Your baby also has prominent facial features, although they are virtually undetectable on an ultrasound. The tongue is forming, and the eyes are nearly fully formed already, and now have the retina and lenses attached. The brain, pancreas, and pituitary gland are growing, and the muscular system continues to develop. By now, your baby also has his or her own blood type," he read.

"Maybe AB like both of us," Meredith smiled.

"Maybe," Derek agreed, mirroring the grin on her face. "Your baby's movements are uncoordinated at best, but rest assured, your little one is already squirming around inside," he said. "Our baby is moving around, Mer," he said happily.

She placed her hand over her belly and rubbed it gently. "Can't feel the little blueberry baby yet," Meredith giggled.

Derek laughed and hugged her closer. "My sisters all said it feels like guppies swimming around."

"Well, when I feel the guppies, you'll be the first to know," she joked, kissing his cheek. Meredith wondered if it was the surge of pregnancy hormones that made her want to constantly be snuggled up next to her husband, or if it was just the bliss they both were feeling. Probably a little of both.

"I'd hope so," he chuckled softly, continuing on. "Little webbed fingers and toes have formed by now--which we saw today--and the baby is already learning to wiggle them around."

Meredith tried to hold back the urge to 'aww' at that, but she couldn't. It melted her into a puddle of goo. "That's so cute," she said in a sing-song voice.

"I know," Derek beamed. "I'm proud of our blueberry. Only created seven weeks ago, and already so accomplished."

"We have a genius baby," Meredith teased, forking a piece of her French toast.

"Future neurosurgeon," he added boastfully. "...Teeth have already started forming in your baby's gums, and thin veins are visible beneath the skin. Your baby's appendix and intestines are fully formed by seven weeks, and the liver is hard at work, producing red blood cells. Though the genital tubercle is already formed, it's impossible to tell whether your baby is a boy or a girl yet."

"Wow. I'm very impressed," she spoke to her belly. "Keep up the good work."

"Aah, it says you might start seeing more of the pouch soon, Mer," Derek read from the book.

She lifted up her shirt a little and they both peered at her belly. "Not yet," Meredith laughed. "Although my jeans actually do feel a little snug. But mostly in my ass."

Derek smirked at his wife. "Your ass is not big," he assured her. "But you're tiny, so you'll probably show a lot sooner than other women. All of my sisters are petite like you, and they started showing at three months."

"Oh God, I'm gonna need to go shopping for maternity clothes soon," she said, eyes wide. "I'll need the stretchy waistband jeans. And scrubs."

"If I keep eating syrup-dipped fries, I'm gonna need some," Derek pointed out humorously.

Meredith smiled cheekily at her husband. "That makes me feel a little better."

--

Later on that night, after they were settled into bed, Charlie resting on Meredith's lap, Derek dialed his mother's phone number and pressed the button for the speaker phone, so they both could talk with her. After two rings, she picked up the phone, and Derek felt the butterflies in his stomach already.

"Hello?" she answered.

Derek smiled. "Hey, Mom."

"Derek, dear! How are you doing? How's Meredith? I miss you two..." Linda said excitedly upon hearing her son's voice.

"We're doing really well. Mer's on the phone too, actually," he said.

"Hi," Meredith greeted.

"How are you, sweetie? It's so nice hearing from you," she smiled into the phone.

"I'm...great," Meredith replied, taking Derek's hand and squeezing it. She nodded encouragingly for him to get down to the real reason behind their call. They needed to tell _someone_ or else they'd burst at the seams.

Derek's heart pounded away in his chest in anticipation. "Actually, Mom, we, uh...we have some news," he said, swallowing a lump in his throat. "Meredith is pregnant."

Linda gasped into the other end of the phone line and Derek could tell his mom was already starting with the waterworks. "Oh my God!" she breathed. "That's...oh my goodness, that's wonderful!" she said, the genuine joy shining through in her voice.

"We just had our first ultrasound today. I'm seven weeks along," Meredith replied. Again, her hand went to her belly. Their baby was always on both of their minds now. "Everything looks good, baby is healthy."

Derek's mother was audibly crying into the phone by now, and he couldn't hold back the tears that filled his own eyes. "You're the first person we told," he said, wiping away a few tears that rolled down his cheeks.

"Finally, I'm getting a grandchild from my only son," she managed to laugh. "Oh, I need pictures..."

"Ultrasound pictures will be in the mail first thing tomorrow," Meredith assured her, smiling. "We have about a hundred of them."

"Were you able to see anything? Hands or feet or..." Linda asked, eager to know everything about her in-utero grandchild.

Derek grinned proudly. "Yep. And the head and back and arms and legs...beautiful, perfect baby."

"Well, of course it is. It belongs to the two of you," she complimented. "When are you due, hun?"

"May 29th," Meredith said, smiling. Her new favorite date. Whatever day their baby was born would be the best day of her life.

"Oh, a spring baby! That's so nice. Derek is a spring baby," Linda said excitedly. "The best kind there are..." she laughed.

"I think so, yes," Derek teased, much to Meredith's amusement.

"How are you feeling, Meredith? Has the morning sickness kicked in yet? Ginger ale and graham crackers in the morning always helped me," Linda suggested, the doting mother in her coming through.

"I'll definitely try that," Meredith giggled. "I've been feeling a little queasy in the mornings for the past few days, but nothing that has me hugging the toilet yet."

Linda laughed. "Maybe you'll be one of the lucky ones that won't suffer through it. But in the end, it's worth it."

"Definitely," Meredith agreed softly, her hand still protectively over her lower belly.

"You two have just made my year. I love you both so much," Linda said as the tears started flowing again.

"We love you, too," Derek smiled sincerely, kissing the back of Meredith's hand.

Meredith studied her husband's face, and felt tears sting her eyes when she noticed how happy he was. She was that happy, too.

Only in existence for seven weeks, and the little life inside of her was bringing them joy they'd never felt before.


	75. The Joys of Morning Sickness

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy. But I was a HUGE fan of the MerDer baby talk in this past episode. Seriously, how adorable are they?**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them! I wanted to get this posted before the weekend. Happy holidays to all who celebrate!**

Nine weeks into the pregnancy, and morning sickness had finally hit. Hard. Every morning, even before the alarm went off, Meredith shot up out of bed and ran for the bathroom clutching her belly. And Derek always followed right behind her, ready to help.

"It's okay," Derek soothed, gently pulling Meredith's hair back into a ponytail as she retched over the toilet. After securing the hair band, he began rubbing her back, something that always made her feel better.

She sat down on the bathroom floor and sighed, while Derek flushed the toilet. "Oh God," she groaned, running her hand over her face. "Can you get me some water?"

"Yeah." Derek quickly filled up a paper cup with some cold water and handed it to his wife. "Just spit it into the toilet," he said.

After she swished it around in her mouth and spit it out, Meredith laid her head down on Derek's lap and closed her eyes. "I don't know which is worse...a tequila hangover or morning sickness."

"Well, with morning sickness, we get a baby," Derek said, trying to make her feel better.

"I know," she whispered as her eyes struggled to stay open.

"Come on, we still have two hours before the alarm goes off. We can go back to bed," Derek said, gingerly picking his wife up off the bathroom floor, careful not to jostle her around and upset her stomach even more. Meredith didn't protest as he lifted her into his arms, instead just curling into him.

He turned off the bathroom light, then walked back into their attached bedroom where their bed was still comfy and warm and waiting for them. "Thank you," Meredith murmured sleepily when he set her back down on the mattress and pulled the covers over her.

After getting back into bed with her and wrapping his arms around her body, Derek pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Thank _you_," he echoed. And he really was thankful to her. Though throwing up every morning was anything but fun, Meredith never once complained about it. She knew it was only temporary, and for their baby, she would willingly suffer through it.

Within seconds, Meredith was already back to sleep, her breath fanning at his neck. Derek knew that when she woke up again, there would probably be another wave of throwing up hitting her, so any rest she could get, he was grateful for it.

The next time Meredith woke up, Derek already had a glass of ginger ale and a plate full of graham crackers on hand. It turned out that the remedy his mother suggested actually helped Meredith with her nausea. So now, they always had bottles of ginger ale and boxes of graham crackers on standby. He set the food on her dresser then looked to the clock. 6:39. Still another twenty minutes before the alarm went off.

He took a quick shower and brushed his teeth so that when she woke up, the bathroom would be free in case she needed to throw up again. The alarm blared at seven o'clock sharp, and Meredith had it shut off instantly. Derek peeked into the room and smiled. "Morning."

"Morning," she yawned.

"I have your food," he said, cocking his head toward her nightstand. "Feeling sick?"

Meredith ran her hand through her hair and shrugged. "A little," she admitted, taking a graham cracker from the plate and biting into it. "These help."

Derek kissed the top of her head. "Good." He noticed the pale, tiredness on her face and frowned. "You feeling okay? You can take the day off."

"I have to go in," Meredith said. "I've already missed a few days. People are gonna get suspicious."

"Mer, you're pregnant," he reminded her.

"But no one knows that," she rebutted, sipping on her ginger ale. A rumble went through her stomach, and she swallowed the bile in her throat. Feeling the urge to throw up moments after waking up every morning wasn't pleasant, but Meredith was soldiering through.

He sat down on the bed next to her, brushing some hair off her face. "Maybe we should tell people then," he suggested.

"Not yet," Meredith shook her head. "Let's just wait until the three month mark. Hospital policy says I can't even start thinking about maternity leave until the second trimester anyway. And I'd rather not have to talk to the Chief and HR yet."

Derek nodded slowly in concurrence. "We wouldn't have to tell them. But what about your friends? Just so they can help you out, if I can't be there," he tried to compromise.

"I don't need them babysitting me. I'm fine," Meredith stressed, taking another small sip from the glass.

"Okay," Derek relented. Rather that get her day off to an even worse start, he decided to drop it. No good would come from upsetting his pregnant, nauseous wife.

"I need to take a shower before we--" she began, before putting her hand over her mouth and dashing off into the bathroom. As soon as Meredith was within projectile range of the toilet, she immediately threw up again.

Like clockwork, Derek was right in there after her, holding her hair away from her face and rubbing her back. He'd become immune to the daily vomiting, and it didn't bother him in the least. "That's it. You're okay," he said.

When the nausea finally passed, Meredith dropped down onto the bathroom floor. "There's nothing left for me to throw up, so I think I'm good," she managed to joke.

Derek handed her a cup of water and smiled. "Okay."

After Meredith brushed her teeth, showered, and was looking more refreshed than she'd been since waking up, Derek was much more at ease about her going into work. Usually, once she got her day started, she was fine. But most mornings were hellish until the waves of nausea subsided.

"Coffee? We have decaf," Derek offered.

Meredith grabbed her travel mug from the cabinet and shook her head. "I'll just put ginger ale in here. Baby doesn't like when I drink coffee," she giggled. Meredith took the two liter bottle of soda from the fridge and filled her mug up to the brim with the fizzy drink. "Your mom is my hero."

"For the graham cracker, ginger ale suggestion?" Derek asked with a chuckle, watching as she tossed a small stack of graham crackers into a Ziploc bag and sealed it.

"Yeah. Seriously, it helps," Meredith nodded.

"Good. I'm glad," Derek smiled, making a mental note to call his mom and thank her endlessly for offering up her infinite motherly wisdom.

"Ready?" she asked.

Derek put his hand on the small of her back and grinned. "Yeah, let's go."

--

"What's up with your wife?" Mark asked, upon seeing Derek in the CT viewing room.

Derek looked up from the scans on the monitor and eyed his friend curiously. "What do you mean?"

"Dr. Graham Cracker was supposed to prep my patient for surgery, but she bailed on me," Mark said. He dropped down in the seat next to Derek and took a sip of his coffee. "She okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine," Derek nodded, hoping Mark didn't continue on with his questioning. "She probably just got busy with something else. I'm sure she'll meet you."

"By the way, what's the deal with all the graham crackers? Is she hoarding them away for winter?" he teased.

Derek rolled his eyes. "She's not a woodland creature. And no, she just...likes graham crackers." Bad explanation, he knew. But what else was he supposed to say? "Any good surgeries today?" he asked in an attempt to veer the conversation elsewhere.

"Hemiglossectomy," Mark said. He turned to Derek and grinned widely. "She's pregnant, isn't she?"

"What?" Derek asked. _Damn it. Damn it. Damn it_, he cursed to himself.

"Grey. You knocked her up," Mark all but cheered, patting Derek on the back. "Congrats, man!"

Derek leaned back in his chair and tipped his head toward the ceiling in defeat. No use denying it now. "Mark, you _can't_ say anything," he stressed. "We haven't told anyone besides my mom and we're not planning on making it public for another three weeks."

"Well, if her boobs don't give it away first," Mark pointed out. "I mean, have you seen those things lately? Scratch that--I'm sure you have," he smirked, raising his eyebrows.

"Please tell me you didn't say that to her face?" Derek groaned, glancing out the door to make sure no one was within earshot of the conversation.

Mark shook his head adamantly. "I'm not an idiot," he replied. "Wow...so she's really got a little Shepherd in there, huh?"

Derek couldn't help but smile a little. Any time he thought of their baby, his heart went nuts inside his chest. "Yeah, she does."

"Am I the godfather?" Mark asked.

"As long as you keep your mouth shut, then yes," Derek said. Maybe the ultimatum would ensure Mark would keep quiet about Meredith's pregnancy. Derek could only hope so.

Mark smiled and shook Derek's hand enthusiastically. "Deal," he agreed.

The CT tech signaled that the scans were complete, and Derek nodded in acknowledgement. "Alright, I have to go. Don't say anything. To anyone," he warned his friend seriously.

"I'm not," Mark said in a huff. "Sheesh..."

Derek laughed. "You thought non-pregnant Meredith could yell? You've never suffered her pregnant wrath."

"Bad?"

"Crying and yelling one minute...sexing and cuddling me the next. Pregnancy is fun," Derek joked amusedly.

"Huh..." Mark contemplated. "Guess I should get my own CT then?"

"Might be wise, yeah."

--

Meredith knelt hunched over the toilet, behind a locked stall in the women's restroom. She knew, even before putting it in her mouth, that eating the breakfast burrito was an epically bad idea. But it smelled good, and she stupidly convinced herself that her stomach could handle it.

Wrong.

Just as she was walking towards her and Mark's patient's room to take the older woman down for her tests, Meredith had quickly veered off down the hallway and made a beeline for the bathroom. She barely had the chance to slide the lock in place before vomiting. Again. As she knelt there, peering into the toilet, Meredith swore off breakfast burritos for the rest of her life. They were cruel.

She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand then stood up to flush the toilet with her foot. "Please be nice to Mommy today," Meredith whispered to her belly. "Mommy needs to work. And I'm pretty sure your Uncle Mark is wondering where the hell I am," she said. "Crap. I mean heck. Crap. I shouldn't say crap in front of you either." She shook her head. "I think I'm losing it."

Meredith heard the door to the restroom open followed by footsteps. "Mer?" she heard Derek's voice call out.

She opened the door to the stall and smiled at her husband. "What're you doing?"

"Mark told me he didn't know where you were, so I figured if there was anywhere you'd be...it was here," Derek explained, handing her a bottle of water. "Sick again?"

Meredith rinsed her mouth out nodded. "Yeah. Breakfast burrito. Bad idea. Very bad."

Derek cringed at the thought. "Sorry," he said softly, kissing her temple.

"Not your fault. I should've known better," she shrugged. "So is Mark still looking for me?"

"About that..."

Meredith's eyes went wide. Whenever he said that, it usually wasn't a good thing. "What?"

"Mark...he, uh...he knows." Derek waited with baited breath while he waited for her reaction. Yelling. Hitting. Both, perhaps.

"You told him?" Meredith gasped, lightly smacking his arm with her hand.

"No," Derek said immediately, bracing himself from her attack. "He just came out and said it."

"Great. We're screwed," Meredith groaned. "Now everyone's gonna know."

Derek smiled when she took the Ziploc full of graham crackers from her coat pocket and started chomping down on one. "I doubt it."

"Why?"

"Because I threatened to take away his godfather privilege if he spilled the beans," Derek grinned.

"Please don't mention beans," Meredith said as she felt her stomach flip-flop.

He wrapped his arms around her and she rested her chin on his shoulder. "It's okay," Derek reassured her. "He won't tell anyone."

"Okay," she sighed. There was no use getting pissed off; it's not like they could un-tell Mark the news, so Meredith just threw caution to the wind and smiled. "Now I can half-ass work when I'm on his service," she giggled. "He'll be afraid to upset me."

"There's the silver lining," he chuckled. "You okay?"

Meredith nodded as they pulled back from their embrace. "Yeah," she said. "Blueberry finds making me sick amusing, that's all."

"Blueberry?"

"That's what I've decided to call our baby until we pick a name. Although actually, in week eight the baby was the size of a lima bean. And we didn't read the week nine section yet," Meredith giggled.

Derek smiled at his wife. "Blueberry Shepherd. Nice ring to it," he winked playfully.

"I think so, too." Meredith leaned in and kissed her husband's cheek. "We should probably leave the bathroom before we get accused of having sex in here."

"There's an idea," Derek smirked.

Meredith took another sip of water and spit it into the sink before laughing at his suggestion. "Yeah. That'd be really sexy right now."

--

Cold water poured onto Meredith's hands as she stepped onto the pedal beneath the sink in the scrub room. As she washed her hands with the yellow antiseptic soap, Mark entered the scrub room and stopped briefly in his tracks before maintaining composure and giving her a typical Mark smile. "Grey," he greeted, grabbing his own bar of soap.

"Mark," she greeted.

"Have you read up on harvesting the nerve roots in the skin grafts?" Mark asked.

Meredith rolled her eyes as he kept up the professionalism. She contemplated going along with it for the sake of amusement, but decided to fill him in. "I know you know," she informed him, rinsing off her hands and stepping off the pedal.

Mark looked over to her with a stunned expression on his face. Busted. And he knew it. "Oh."

"Yeah," Meredith said. "And it's okay. Just...I'd appreciate if you could--"

"Keep my mouth shut. Yeah, got it," he chuckled. "Congrats, by the way."

She smiled beneath her scrub mask. "Thanks, Mark."

Their conversation effectively ended when Bailey walked into the room, and she looked to the two of them suspiciously. "What?"

"Nothing," they replied in unison.

Meredith followed Mark into the OR and sighed. She really hated keeping secrets. But really, the pregnancy was between her and Derek. And inadvertently, Mark, who always seemed to involve himself one way or the other. Still though, part of Meredith wished they were at the twelve week mark, just for the sake of not having to keep the news to themselves. And maybe by then, the morning sickness might not be so bad either.

After the surgery was underway, Meredith actually felt better than she had all day. Her stomach was finally calmed down, and the breakfast burrito stopped its rebellion against her body. She was focused, and her mind was sharp, just like it always was in the OR.

Until Mark handed her the cautery pen.

Once she started burning off the small bleeders, and the charring smell infiltrated her nostrils through her surgical mask, the bile rose in her throat again. A chant of _no no no no no_ went through her head, and she did anything she could to ward off the need to throw up. Throwing up on the patient in the middle of surgery? Not a good thing. Not to mention, she'd probably never be allowed to scrub in on anything ever again.

"You okay, Grey?" Mark asked, noticing her uneasiness.

She nodded and tried to play it cool. "I'm fine," Meredith assured him.

Meredith tried breathing through her mouth so the smell wouldn't bother her as much, and it worked for a few minutes, until she started gagging on the acidic taste in her mouth. As calmly as she could, she handed the cautery to Dr. Bailey and backed away from the table.

"I need to use the bathroom," she announced, before gracefully turning around and heading into the scrub room, then the hall.

She raced toward the bathroom, pushed the door open, and dashed into the nearest stall. And though she felt the urge to vomit, as she leaned over the toilet, Meredith just heaved dryly. There was nothing left inside her besides a single graham cracker which had probably been digested by now. Her stomach was literally devoid of food. Running her hand over her belly, Meredith frowned.

She was eating for two now. Sure, it was easy, sharing her body with their lima bean-sized baby, but it was still a baby that needed nutrients. After Meredith splashed some cold water over her face and washed her hands with the cheap flowery-scented soap in the pump, in an attempt to replace the bad smell stuck in her nose with something a little more pleasant, she ran back to the resident lounge and scanned the row of cubbies in search of food.

When she spotted a banana in Cristina's, Meredith snatched it out and peeled it open. If that made her a thief, so be it. She'd replace it later. She jogged and chewed at the same time, managing to scarf down the whole thing by the time she reached the scrub room again. Eating wasn't high on her list of desires at the moment, but her mommy instincts took over. Baby needed food, so baby got food. Simple.

"Welcome back," Mark said after she scrubbed back in and rejoined them in the OR.

Meredith noticed the knowing grin beneath Mark's mask and resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him. "Sorry," she apologized.

"Don't worry about it," was all he said.

Maybe he wasn't going to be a pain in the ass with his treasured little tidbit of information after all.

She managed to get through the rest of the surgery without needing to leave again, probably thanks to the banana in her stomach. As she pulled off her gloves and tossed them into the trash, Meredith silently thanked little Blueberry for making her eat that banana. Otherwise, it could have been bad.

Mark quickly washed up so he could meet their patient in post-op, and only Meredith and Bailey remained in the scrub room.

It was silent for a few moments before Bailey spoke. She pulled a paper towel from the holder and looked to Meredith. "It's the cautery," she said.

Meredith knitted her brow in confusion. "What?"

"The smell. I had a tough time handling it, too," Bailey disclosed, though Meredith was still in the dark.

"I'm sorry, what?" Meredith repeated as she adjusted her name tag on her pocket.

Bailey's eyes softened and she smiled at her former intern. "You're pregnant, right?"

In that moment, Meredith swore she must have a sign around her neck with big flashing neon letters that said _'Ask me about my pregnancy'_ on it. She stood there, dumbfounded, and all she could manage to do was nod in admittance. _So much for keeping it a secret_.

"Yeah."

"I know it's none of my business--I just, as someone who was once in your shoes, I could tell," Bailey explained.

Meredith nodded slowly. "Oh, well, yeah...I am."

"Mint chapstick helps," she said simply, tossing her paper towel in the trash.

"I'm sorry?"

"If you roll on some minty chapstick before surgery, it blocks out the smell of the cautery. Really helped me," Bailey suggested kindly.

Meredith absentmindedly ran her hands over her lower abdomen and bit her lip. "Oh. Thanks."

Bailey just nodded, turning around to leave. Right before she pulled the door open, she looked back and smiled. "Congratulations, Meredith."

"Thank you, Dr. Bailey," Meredith said softly, mirroring her smile.

Bailey left the scrub room without another word, leaving Meredith standing there alone. She laughed to herself about how the day had gone so far: vomiting, confessing, vomiting, confessing. It was like a mini-mystery now, something out of an Agatha Christie novel. Two knew already. And she wondered how long it would take for everyone else to figure it out, too.

--

Besides involuntarily letting people in on their secret, the day wasn't without its perks. Mark, seeming to sense that Meredith needed an early night, was kind enough to take care of their patient after surgery, instead of making her do it. And Derek had a light surgery day anyway, so they were able to sneak out by six.

Sans morning sickness, pregnancy was actually fun. Especially because Mark was afraid to anger a pregnant woman. He knew his godfather role was at stake if he did. Of course, Mark would be the godfather regardless, but still, it was amusing to mess with him.

Meredith turned off the shower, dried herself, and walked into their bedroom wrapped in her towel. After grabbing a pair of panties from her drawer, she let the towel fall to the floor. When she glanced in the mirror, Meredith's breath caught in her throat.

A bump. Definitely a baby bump. Very small, but there, without a doubt. She ran her hand over the barely swollen mound just below her belly button, unable to take her eyes off of it. It was beautiful.

The door to their bedroom opened and Derek entered, smirking when he saw her standing there naked. But before he could say anything, his eyes were drawn to it, too. The bump. Their baby. "Mer," he gasped. "Oh my God."

Meredith looked up at her husband and smiled. "So I'm not going crazy, right? There's really something there?"

"Yeah," Derek said breathily as he gently ran his fingers across her belly, taking in the swell of her skin. "When did this get here?"

"I don't know," she giggled. "I don't remember it being here yesterday..."

"Me either," Derek chuckled. He wiped a tear from under his eye and kissed her. A kiss to celebrate their visible miracle, the one they created together. "God, I love you."

She leaned into her husband, breathing him in. "I love you, too." Meredith felt the wet ends of her hair dripping down her back, and was reminded of her current state. "I'm naked."

"I can see that," Derek grinned, wrapping his arms around her to keep her warm.

"Blueberry definitely grew," Meredith laughed, as her hands found her belly again.

"Definitely did," Derek agreed, smiling at his wife.

Meredith felt her slightly sore breasts pressing against his chest and pulled back from their embrace. "I'd keep hugging you like this, but my boobs kinda hurt," she said.

Derek ran his hands up and down her arms, smirking. "They're getting bigger."

"Yes, thank you for pointing that out," Meredith said playfully. She looked down at her naked, pregnant body and sighed happily. "You'll still want to have sex with me when I'm fat, right?"

"Meredith," he laughed.

"Just checking," she shrugged, pulling her panties up her legs.

"That's something you never need to ask me." Derek kissed her cheek and headed toward the door. "I have dinner downstairs. Bring the week by week book," he winked.

Meredith smiled as she slipped a tee shirt over her head. "Okay." She quickly pulled on a pair of pajama pants, took the book off of Derek's nightstand, and met her husband down in the kitchen. To her surprise, she actually felt hungry. It was like seeing the little bump of her belly had given her a renewed sense of appetite.

"What's all this?" Meredith asked upon entering their kitchen.

Derek set their plates at the counter and kissed her cheek. "Dinner. Spaghetti with butter--not sauce, grilled chicken, and salad. Foods that shouldn't bother your stomach _and _covers the food groups. Carb, protein, fat, and vegetable."

That made her fall in love with him a little more.

"Thank you," she said softly, sitting down in the chair.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asked. He sat down next to her and handed her a glass of water. "Sick?"

Meredith shook her head. "No. I feel good," she answered honestly. "I mean, it sucks that morning sickness was pretty much all day sickness today, and that Mark and Bailey are good mystery solvers. But this..." she said, pointing to her belly. "This makes all of that...totally worth it."

"I bet it does," Derek grinned in agreement.

"So, nine weeks." Meredith picked up the week by week book and began reading from it. They'd fallen into a routine over the past few weeks, catching up on, as Derek put it, _'what was going on in the world inside of Meredith's uterus.'_

"Your baby is now the size of an acorn. Though still weighing less than an ounce, your baby will soon begin gaining weight dramatically over the next few weeks..." she read.

Morning sickness? Definitely worth the payoff of the new little bump that was their child.


	76. A Day of Surprises

**Disclaimer: Don't own it.**

**Thanks for the reviews! And thank you for being patient. This time of the semester is crazy, and sometimes, this fic has to get put on hold. But school ends in three weeks, so I should be able to post more often. Anyway, enjoy! :)**

Derek rubbed the tiredness from his eyes as he walked down the hall, a large caffeinated coffee in his hand. Five AM surgery was always an early start to the day, especially when the night before had been spent having sex into the wee hours of the morning. Meredith's libido had gone through the roof, and it was rare if more than twelve hours went between rounds of sex. And horniness was definitely better than morning sickness, which had recently begun to wane a little. She still felt queasy most mornings, but after getting some food in her, Meredith's urge to vomit decreased significantly. He was still thanking his lucky stars for that, for Meredith's sake.

Just as he was headed for the nurses' station, Derek's cell phone signaled a new text and he pulled it from the holder on his hip. From Meredith, as usual.

_911. Lounge!_

A million horrible thoughts went through Derek's mind as he ran toward the resident lounge. Meredith's shift had just begun at seven, so she'd probably only arrived a few minutes ago. Being pregnant, he knew anything could happen at the drop of a hat, and he felt the bile creep into his throat as he jogged down the hall. _Baby. __Meredith__. Baby. __Meredith__._ He chanted the words over and over in his head.

When he made a halting stop outside the door, Derek quickly flung it open, expecting the worst. So when he saw his wife sitting on the bench in her jeans, which were becoming hard to button these days, and a gray sweater on, no trace of blood or horror anywhere, he cocked his head in confusion.

"Mer?"

Meredith turned around on the bench, clutching her scrub pants, her eyes full to the brim with tears. He dropped down beside her and frowned in worry. "What's wrong?" Derek asked, while he tried to catch his breath.

"They don't fit anymore," she whimpered. "I mean, they do, but my ass looks huge and the drawstring isn't long enough to tie over the bump." Meredith sobbed into his shoulder and Derek quickly wrapped his arm around her.

In addition to the horniness came hormones. Crying fits were a daily occurrence.

"That's why you paged me 911?" he chuckled, attempting to lighten her mood. Because really, she was adorable like this, though he'd never say it to her face. "Mer, it's no big deal. There's a growing baby inside you. It's a good thing..."

"I need to wear pants, Derek," Meredith cried, using her sleeve as a tissue to wipe her eyes.

"I'll go find you a stretchy pair, the kind with the elastic waistband," he offered.

Bad idea.

Meredith's crying escalated and she dropped her normal blue scrub pants to the floor. "Oh God, it's official," she sobbed. "I'm fat."

"Meredith," Derek sighed amusedly. "You're pregnant. You're carrying our child. Your body is just growing. And you're not fat," he assured her.

"I am," she countered. "And my boobs...they're all swollen and enormous."

Derek pressed a comforting kiss to her temple. "Meredith, you look beautiful. Your ass isn't big, and your boobs are growing because of...nature," he skirted. Somehow, he knew explaining the beauty of womanhood right now wouldn't be wise. He smoothed his fingers through her hair and smiled. "I've never been more in love with you."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked, running her hand over her bump, which was getting bigger each day. Thankfully, it was concealed enough under her scrub shirt that no one suspected it of being hidden under there. Or not yet, anyway.

Derek rested his hand over hers and nodded. "Yes."

"Okay," Meredith whispered as she leaned into her husband. She breathed him in for a few minutes, letting herself regain composure before she spoke. "Sorry, I'm a basket case."

"No, you're not." Derek shook his head. "A pants emergency definitely warrants a 911 page."

She giggled at the absurdity, though in the heat of the moment, it really did seem like a crisis. "It's rude to mock your pregnant wife," Meredith said.

"Sorry," he chuckled. "So...do you want pants?"

"Yeah, I should probably get dressed." Meredith looked to her old pants, pooled on the floor at her feet and sighed. "I'm gonna miss the normal pants."

Derek smiled amusedly. "Six months from now, you'll slip right back into them," he said. "But can we keep the boobs?"

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully and nudged his hip with hers. "Shut up."

--

After Meredith's mini emergency earlier that morning, she and Derek were eating breakfast in the cafeteria before their surgery started at nine o'clock. There were definitely perks to being on Derek's service. More time together, and the occasional free time, which was just as nice.

"Hey," Mark said, dropping down into the chair next to them.

Meredith spooned some strawberry yogurt into her mouth and smiled. "Hey, Mark."

"How's the...you know?" he said nonchalantly.

"Huh?" Derek asked.

Mark's eyes traveled down to Meredith's torso and he raised his eyebrows. "Oh," Meredith figured out. "Good. Growing. And finally letting me eat again."

"Good," Mark said, patting her shoulder encouragingly. He waited a few moments before speaking. "So...guess who got engaged last night," he grinned proudly, waiting for their reactions.

Derek looked to his friend in wide-eyed shock. "What?"

"That's right," Mark nodded. "I popped the question and Bridget said yes." He leaned back in the chair and reveled in his victory, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Why didn't you tell us you were proposing?" Meredith asked, biting into her cream-cheese covered bagel. Her appetite was definitely re-emerging, and she was loving it.

Mark shrugged. "I dunno. In case she said no."

"Congratulations, Mark," Meredith said sincerely. "Bridget is great. We're so happy for you." She squeezed his arm gently and smiled. Mark was still Mark, but the man whore in him had disappeared since Bridget came along. And she really was thrilled for him.

"That's great, man," Derek congratulated, smiling. "That was...fast, huh?"

"Nearly a year," Mark said. "But it's...I know she's the one. Honestly, you two are the reason I took the plunge."

Derek turned to Meredith and then Mark. "Us?"

"Yeah," Mark nodded. "You know, because of the baby and all. Moving forward. Change is good."

A smile came over Meredith's face and she laced her fingers through Derek's. "Good. I'm glad," she said supportively.

"Any wedding date set?" Derek asked.

"She likes the spring. I dunno yet. Maybe late April," he shrugged.

Meredith licked some cream cheese off her finger and giggled. "When I'm eight months pregnant? Okay, that's cruel," she teased.

"They sell maternity dresses, don't they?" Mark pointed out, causing Derek to stifle a laugh. Probably not the best thing to say, considering this morning's meltdown.

"Okay, I'm gonna pretend you didn't just say that." Meredith rolled her eyes playfully before taking a sip of apple juice.

"What?" Mark asked, confused.

Derek laughed. "You missed the emergency this morning."

Meredith pointed her spoon at him in warning. "If you ever wanna see my boobs again, that story stays between us," she joked with him.

"I would ask to see them, but I'm a marriage-bound man now," Mark grinned, standing up and grabbing his coffee from the table.

"Do you have a surgery?" Derek asked.

"Yeah. Paletal reconstruction."

Meredith slid Derek's muffin across the table and took a bite, much to the amusement of the other two. "What?"

"Nothing," Mark shrugged, lest he anger the pregnancy gods. "See you guys later."

Derek waved him off. "See you. And congrats!"

"Thanks!" Mark called back.

"We need to buy some of these for home," Meredith said, chomping down on the flaky blueberry pastry.

"Will do," Derek chuckled.

--

Right before Meredith pressed on the water pedal to scrub in on her surgery with Derek, she pulled her mint chapstick from her pocket and rolled a liberal amount on her lips. Bailey's suggestion had been a godsend. Since investing in a simple tube of chapstick, the cautery smell barely bothered her anymore, which was good, because it was typically frowned upon to vomit in the OR.

"I like that stuff. Tastes good," Derek chuckled while drying his hands off.

Meredith smacked her lips together and smiled. "Hmm...yeah?"

"Very." Derek tiled her chin toward him and kissed her, and she moaned against his lips. If they were at home instead of scrubbing in on a two year old's brain surgery, she'd be dragging him upstairs by now. Being horny twenty-four-seven was exhausting, but still fun.

They finished scrubbing in and walked into the OR, where Andrew, a two year old boy, was being treated for a tumor removal. Meredith swallowed hard when she saw the toddler's tiny body surrounded by surgical equipment. It was always difficult treating kids, but being pregnant made it even harder. She always unwillingly produced these horrible images of their own baby on the table and in need of a life saving operation. She knew it was just her irrational pregnant mind doing strange things, but still, it knotted her stomach every time.

Meredith trailed her gloved hand over her belly comfortingly. All three of them--Derek, the baby, and herself--were healthy and loved. That thought got her through tough surgeries like this one.

"Dr. Shepherd, would you care to handle the drill?" Derek asked.

"Sure," Meredith nodded eagerly, accepting the neurosurgical drill from her husband. "Drilling three burr holes along the parietal lobe," she announced.

Derek watched as she expertly drilled the holes into the boy's skull. "Excellent."

Once the holes were in place and the skull portion was removed, Meredith stepped to the side so Derek could stand directly over the open brain. "You're doing this," he said, nodding to the surgical field.

"Me? But it's...are you sure?" she asked.

"Absolutely," Derek grinned beneath his mask.

"Okay." Meredith released a breath and stepped back. "Penfield four, please?" she requested of the scrub nurse.

Derek watched as she maneuvered the instrument under the tumor gingerly so she wouldn't cause damage to the surrounding tissues, then carefully dissected the tumor out, inch by inch. When she stopped cutting briefly, he looked to her, confused. "What's wrong?"

"It's too close to this artery," Meredith pointed. "I don't want to nick it accidentally."

"You won't," he assured her, shaking his head. "It's pliable. Here, I'll slide it over so you can cut around it," Derek said.

Meredith nodded. "Okay."

With Derek's assistance, she cut out the remainder of the tumor with ease. It was an adrenaline rush every time he stepped aside and let her do everything. Her alertness was heightened so much that all the irrational thoughts disappeared, and it was just her and Derek and the surgery. And of course, the baby inside her.

"Very good," Derek hummed, examining her work. "No residual bleeding, good pulsation through the area. I think we're done here."

"That's all?"

Derek chuckled. "That's all," he echoed. "Dr. Smithson, would you mind closing him up?"

As they scrubbed out, Meredith couldn't help but smile. "Am I allowed to be doing all of that? I mean, that's okay, right?"

"What? Doing the surgery?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

"I'm right next to you the whole time. And besides, how else would you learn?" Derek pointed out, tossing his paper towel into the trash can.

Meredith giggled. "Okay, then."

"What?"

"I think someone is just letting me do all of that stuff in return for sexual favors," Meredith smirked teasingly.

Derek opened the door and they walked into the hallway, glancing around to make sure no one could hear their conversation. "I don't need to. You're the insatiably horny one."

"Oh, just me?"

"You're the one who jumped me last night while I was loading the dishwasher," Derek grinned, pulling off his scrub cap.

"You looked hot," Meredith said in defense of herself.

Derek laughed. "_That_ turns you on?"

"Yes." Meredith admitted, taking off her own scrub cap and fixing her ponytail. "You being all...husbandly? Makes me want to drag you into bed. Every. Time."

"Hmm...yeah?"

"These days, everything you do makes me horny. I can't help it," she giggled. Meredith took his hand and squeezed it. "And there's a hundred percent chance of you getting lucky tonight, too."

Derek kissed her temple after they stepped into the elevator. "Horny you is much more fun than vomiting you," he chuckled.

"Anything is better than vom--" Meredith stopped abruptly and her hands flew to her belly. "Oh!" she gasped.

For the second time that day, Derek's heart nearly stopped beating inside his chest and his eyes grew wide in fear. "Mer, what?"

"Guppies," Meredith whispered. "Der, I think I feel something." She looked to her husband, tears already pooled in her eyes. "It's..."

"The baby," he finished. Derek smiled when Meredith reached for his hand and pressed it under her belly button, hoping for him to feel too.

"Right here," she said as she guided his hand. "Do you feel that?"

Though dull and tiny, Derek could make out the slight rippling going on. "Oh my God, Mer," he breathed. "That's our baby."

"It feels kind of like popcorn popping," Meredith described, focusing on nothing else but the feeling of their baby inside her. "Holy crap."

"That's incredible," Derek said in awe, pulling the stop button on the elevator panel so they could revel in their moment. Those in line for the elevator would just have to wait. This trumped...everything.

"I'm only eleven weeks along. It's...is that normal?" she asked. "I mean, you were married to an OB for eleven years. That's normal, right? Not just gas bubbles or something?"

A grin came over Derek's face, his hand still pressed to her belly. "It's normal. My sisters all started feeling movement around this time. It's small little vibrations in the uterus. Sometimes, when the baby wiggles, even the tiniest bit, you can feel it," he recalled. "That's definitely the baby."

"Derek." A tear slipped from Meredith's eye and she smiled at him.

"God, I love you," Derek whispered, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close to him. When their lips touched, Meredith threaded her fingers through his hair and her heart thudded wildly in her chest.

"I love you," Meredith murmured against his mouth. "Hmm...Blueberry must be very busy."

He wiped a tear from his own eye and laughed. "Must be," Derek agreed, grinning. "You and Blueberry are very good at giving me conniptions on a daily basis."

"Sorry. I guess after the freak out this morning, and then this, you'll probably need some Xanax to calm your nerves," she joked.

"As long as the freak outs end up being good things, it's okay," he said, running his hand through his hair. "That was the coolest thing I've ever felt."

"I know," she whispered, leaning her weight into him. "I'm glad it happened here, and not in surgery. Then _everybody_ would have known about it."

Derek pushed in the stop button and the elevator resumed its flight up to the fifth floor. "Our child has good timing."

"For now. When I'm nine months pregnant and my water breaks in the OR, not so much," Meredith giggled.

--

"Andrew's surgery went very well. There was no unexpected bleeding, and we were able to remove the entire tumor, so barring any complications, he should be good to go home in a few weeks," Derek explained to the two year old's parents.

"You got all of it? So he won't need a second operation?" the boy's mother asked.

Meredith shook her head reassuringly. "Dr. Shepherd and I maneuvered around all the major blood vessels, and cut everything out. Your son did very well," she nodded encouragingly.

"Thank you both, so much," Andrew's father said, wrapping his arm around his wife.

"Thank her," Derek said graciously, nodding toward Meredith. "She's the reason Andrew is going to live a long, healthy life."

Andrew's mother pulled Meredith in for an unexpected hug, and all Meredith could do was hug the woman back. "Oh. It's...my pleasure," she said softly. "I'm just glad he's doing well."

Derek smiled at his wife as they walked toward the nurses' station, and she elbowed him gently. "You didn't have to do that."

"What?"

"Give me all the credit. You taught me how to do the surgery in the first place," Meredith pointed out, handing him a pen from her pocket so he could scribble down some notes.

"You're the one who did it," Derek shrugged. "Of course I'd give you the credit."

"Thank you." Meredith stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "I appreciate it."

Derek slipped the pen back in her pocket and smiled at her. "Go get changed. I'll meet you."

"Okay."

Meredith headed for the resident lounge, eager to get changed and go home. There had been a lot of excitement, and now, she was tired. And hungry. And horny. Pregnancy was quirky that way. "Hey," she greeted her friends, also getting ready to leave for the evening.

George scooted over on the bench. "Hey."

She took off her coat and placed it on the hook in her cubby, then grabbed her bag out from inside. "Any good surgeries today?" Meredith asked, as she absentmindedly began pulling her scrub top over her head.

"Hunt let me scrub in on a transhiatal--holy crap!" Cristina gasped, gawking at Meredith's belly, and the other three followed in line.

_Crap. Crap Crap._

Meredith quickly pulled her scrub top back down, which had been static clinging to her red long sleeve shirt underneath. "I um..."

"Meredith! Oh my God!" Izzie all but flailed. "You're pregnant! How long has that been hidden under there?"

"I--" Meredith stammered. She was busted and she knew it.

"How long have you known?" Izzie asked as she rushed over and planted herself on the bench right in front of Meredith. "Can I feel it?"

"Feel what?" she asked.

Izzie grinned. "The bump. AKA, my little niece or nephew." She held out a cautionary hand, waiting patiently until Meredith gave the okay. When she nodded, Izzie's hand went right to Meredith's belly and she splayed her fingers over it.

"Congrats, Mer" Alex said, unclipping his nametag from his coat pocket.

"How far along are you?" George asked.

Cristina stared at Meredith and a small smile came over her face. "Holy crap," she repeated.

"Eleven weeks. We were gonna tell you guys, once I was into the second trimester. Really, we were. You have no idea how hard it's been to keep it a secret, but I just--" Meredith explained, as four pairs of eyes looked right at her.

"Mer, this is amazing," Izzie chimed in, a smile radiating from her face.

"When are you due?" Alex asked curiously as he rolled his eyes amusedly at Izzie, who was fascinated by the baby bump.

"May 29th." Meredith suddenly felt like she was on trial with all the questioning going on and she laughed. "Didn't know everyone was so interested..."

"Of course we are," Izzie said. "You're pregnant. Do you have any ultrasound pictures?"

"Yeah." Meredith reached into her bag and pulled one of the wallet sized ultrasound photos she always carried around with her. Whenever she looked at it, her heart always fluttered in her chest and she smiled. "Derek has some in his wallet, too. And there's a few on the fridge at home. And we each have a framed one on our nightstands," Meredith said with a giggle, as a sense of relief washed over her. It was actually kind of nice telling her friends.

They all gathered around to check out the picture, even Cristina, who was surprisingly interested in what was going on. Normally, baby talk bored her to tears, but Meredith supposed that when the baby in question belonged to her person, the topic wasn't so toxic.

"Oh my God, you can already see the teeny tiny little fingers," Izzie said in awe. When she looked up at Meredith, there were tears in her eyes. "I'm gonna hug you."

Izzie handed the picture to George, who seemed delighted to be able to take a closer look. She wrapped her arms around Meredith, careful not to squeeze her too hard on account of the baby between them. "Congratulations, Meredith," she said softly.

Meredith fought back the tears in her own eyes. This wasn't how she wanted her friends to find out, but as she was learning, pregnancy was full of the unexpected. And she really wouldn't want to trade these moments for anything. "Thanks, Iz."

"What's going on in here?" Derek asked curiously, setting his bag down on a chair and walking towards them.

Cristina held up the picture, waving it at him. "We're admiring your spawn," she said bluntly.

"They know?" Derek addressed his wife in shock.

Meredith shrugged. "Blame static cling."

"Congrats, dude," Alex grinned, patting Derek's back. "Cute fetus."

George handed him the photo back and Derek neatly tucked it back into the flap inside Meredith's wallet. "I think so, too," Derek chuckled.

"Only eleven weeks? You're already so big--not like that. You're tiny to begin with so obviously you would show early; but there's definitely a baby in there. It's just...how did we not see this?" Izzie asked, gently placing her hand back on Meredith's belly. Normally, Meredith would be annoyed by all the touching, but she knew it was just the excitement. And not a day went by where Derek didn't touch, kiss, and talk to her belly at least fifty times. She was used to it.

"Scrubs are very forgiving," Meredith joked. "But I'm in the stretchy pants now."

Cristina pursed her lips to resist smirking at that, but her attempt was futile, and she made a face anyway. "Don't even," Meredith warned playfully, pointing a finger at her friend. "Okay, everybody, there are to be no fat jokes. No commenting about my boobs or my ass."

"Yeah, not a good idea," Derek agreed. "Please be nice to my pregnant wife."

"Come on, that's no fun," Cristina rebutted.

Meredith eyed her friend seriously. "Not a word," she reiterated. She reached for her change of clothes and used Derek's shoulder for leverage as she pulled off her shoes. "Any questions?"

"Let me know a date for the baby shower. I'll plan it for you," Izzie offered, finally removing her hand from Meredith's abdomen.

"Probably not until spring," Derek smiled.

"Good. That gives me plenty of time to plan," she said enthusiastically. "Are you gonna find out the sex?"

"Aren't you glad they know?" Meredith asked Derek with a giggle, running a hand through her husband's hair.

Derek laughed amusedly. "Would've happened eventually."


	77. Hearing the Heartbeat

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but I do not.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them! School ends this coming week, so I should definitely be able to write and post a lot more. As always, I appreciate your patience. Anyway, enjoy. **

Meredith slowly opened her eyes, letting them get adjusted to the little slants of light pouring in through the closed curtains of their bedroom. It was Saturday, that much cherished day off, and it was early. Usually, she'd just roll over and fall back to sleep, but the only thing Meredith could concentrate on was waking up her husband for some sex. Morning, noon, or night, come fire or flood, she craved it. And Derek was always happy to grant her wish.

Meredith bit her lip and scooted toward Derek's side of the bed, hoping that he'd be willing right now, too, given it was a lazy Saturday, one that normally was spent sleeping in until noon. She brought her lips to his neck, and kissed right above the collar of his tee shirt, then slowly began working her way up his jaw, stopping to suck on his skin and take teasing, gentle bites with her teeth. Derek let out a sleepy groan of pleasure as he came to, and his blue eyes peeked out from behind closed lids.

"Morning," he whispered, smiling. "Why are you awake? It's only..." he looked over at the clock on the nightstand, next to the sonogram of their baby in the wooden picture frame. "...eight o' clock."

"I'm horny," Meredith shrugged. "And I can't go back to sleep unless I get it."

Derek smirked tiredly at his pregnant wife. She was glowy and beautiful and getting rounder every day. Pregnancy agreed with her, and neither of them could remember a time when they were happier than this. "Okay, then." He dipped his head down and trailed his tongue down the line of her throat, taking in the way her body reacted to him. Within seconds, Meredith was covered with chills, and her back was arching off the bed in pure need.

She smiled when he pulled her shirt over her head, leaning her head back on the pillows and letting him work his magic on her body. "Derek," she sighed in contentment when he ran his hands over her slightly fuller breasts, taking in their weight and softness. When he pulled a nipple into his mouth, she moaned. "Oh God..."

"Hmm..." Derek laughed against her skin. He quickly pulled his shirt over his head, followed by his pants and boxers, then leaned back over her. "Love you."

"I love you," Meredith said softly, closing her eyes in bliss when he hooked his fingers through her pants and panties and pulled them down her legs.

"Do you...on top?" he asked as he kissed her barely-there, swollen belly tenderly and ran his hands over her flesh. If it was possible to do nothing for the next six months but stare at her growing belly, he'd do it in a heartbeat. Her body, with their tiny little miracle inside, fascinated him.

Meredith traced her fingers down her chest and shook her head. "No, I'm good."

"Okay." Derek slipped his fingers between her legs, smiling when he felt how ready she was. All of the hormones were amping up her sex drive to an unimaginable level, even for Meredith.

She smiled up at her husband as he gently pushed into her. These moments of intimacy, the ones only shared by the two of them, were enough to bring Meredith to tears. _Derek. Baby. Love_. The thoughts swirled around in her mind and left her feeling nothing but bliss. Inch by inch, Derek scanned her eyes, gauging for signs, waiting for his cue to move.

"Derek," Meredith breathed, anchoring her hands in the curls of his hair, smoothing it between her fingers.

He ducked his head down to the dip between her neck and shoulder and inhaled deeply. "Hmm," Derek hummed in agreement, reading her mind without words.

"Yeah," was all she said. Her eyes slowly slipped shut and Meredith felt him breathing against her skin. She let herself succumb to the bliss, and arched her back with each thrust. Derek moving inside her, his skin against hers, the two of them wrapped together in a cocoon under the blanket.

Derek kept the pace slow, drawing out their pleasure as long as he could. Meredith's legs wrapped around his waist and she pressed the heels of her feet into his ass in an attempt to get him to move faster, but he wouldn't give in.

"Derek, please," she all but begged. She could feel herself teetering on the brink, and wished more than anything that he would just freaking let her get there.

"Please what?"

Meredith laughed despite her frustrations. "Do it faster. You're killing me."

"Someone's impatient," Derek chuckled, only increasing his pace by the tiniest bit.

"I blame you. You're the one who got me pregnant and turned me into a sex machine," she pointed out. He sped up for a few moments and Meredith whined in pleasure. "Keep doing that!" she said.

"You're no fun," Derek teased, but still relenting and doing it her way. He leaned down and kissed her, threading his fingers through her hair. When Meredith snaked her tongue into his mouth, Derek moaned. Any chance of him slowing down again was effectively out the window whenever her tongue was in his mouth.

"I...woke you...up...for sex," Meredith said between kisses. "I'm plenty...of fun." When she squeezed around him, Derek let out a tortured groan and she giggled. "See? Fun."

Derek's breath caught in his throat as she did it again. "Evil," he choked out.

"Fine, I'll be nice." Meredith released her hold on him and he resumed moving within her. All cognitive thought escaped her when he gently threw her legs over his shoulders. "Derek!"

_That'll do it._

The change of his angle sent her spiraling over the edge, and her body was blissfully overcome with wave after wave of pleasure, which had her moaning and thrashing against the sheets. The feel of her, and the way her body glowed beneath him was too much, and Derek rested his forehead against Meredith's as he came, too. Their breathing mingled as they rode out the last waves and came back down to earth.

Moments passed before Derek regretfully rolled off of her onto his side. Pregnancy had made her breasts tender, and the baby between them made it hard to rest atop her. "Better now?"

Meredith swallowed hard as her breathing returned to normal, and she smiled up at the ceiling. "Yes." She felt her eyelids becoming heavy again, her sex craving now satiated, and she curled up against her husband, resting her head on his chest. "Thanks for servicing me," she said with a tired giggle.

"Servicing you?" Derek echoed, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her closer to him.

"I'm a sex fiend. I just need it," Meredith admitted. She draped her hand over her belly and smiled contentedly. "It's like scratching an itch. I swear, my sex craving is worse than my food craving."

Derek grinned. "Happy to help."

"My appointment is at two," she yawned sleepily. "We should go back to sleep..."

"Okay," Derek whispered.

"Hmm...love you," Meredith said before her eyelids slipped shut, her hand still over the bump that was their baby.

He pulled the blanket snugly overtop of them and pressed a kiss to her temple. "I love you both."

"Me, too."

Derek held Meredith's hand as they walked through the automatic front doors of the hospital. Today was their twelve week ultrasound, the day they got to hear their baby's heartbeat for the very first time, and neither could contain their excitement. Seeing their baby was the most thrilling feeling in the world.

"It's weird coming here, and not having to work," Meredith giggled, pressing the button for the elevator.

He laughed in agreement. "Kinda nice," Derek said.

The elevator doors opened and Mark smiled widely when he saw them. "Hey, you two," he greeted as they stepped on.

"Hey," Derek smiled, pressing the button for the third floor.

"Going to check out the McNugget?" Mark asked.

Meredith rolled her eyes amusedly. "Yeah, we are. Twelve week appointment today. McNugget is definitely bigger than an actual McNugget by now."

"I wanna see pictures," Mark said as the doors to the third floor opened.

Derek gave his friend a thumbs up and grinned proudly. "Will do."

They entered Dr. Halloran's office, and after filling out the usual paperwork, they were taken back to a patient room, where the nurse proceeded to check Meredith's weight and blood pressure. As soon as she stepped onto the scale, she held her breath in anticipation. The number was going up, which she knew was a good thing, but still. It bugged.

"Good. You've gained two pounds since your last visit," the nurse said encouragingly, writing it down in Meredith's chart.

Meredith winced over at Derek, who simply smiled at her sympathetically. But then she just shrugged, as if to throw caution to the wind and let her body do what it had to do. For their baby, she'd gain as much weight as need be. "Okay," she said.

She hopped up onto the table so the nurse could take her blood pressure, and Derek walked over and stood beside her. Meredith smiled at him; most men probably didn't enjoy being dragged along to these visits, but there was no way he'd ever miss one. He was always by her side, every step of the way.

"120 over 80--perfect blood pressure," the nurse nodded. "Everything is looking great, Meredith. You're right on track for twelve weeks. I'm going to let Dr. Halloran know you're waiting."

"Okay; thank you," Meredith replied, trailing her fingers over her belly nervously.

After the nurse left the room, Derek turned to Meredith worriedly. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just jitters, I guess. I'm more excited than nervous, though. Don't worry," she giggled as she ran her thumb over the back of his hand.

Derek pulled his wallet from his back pocket and removed their first ultrasound photo from the picture slot inside. "Still nervous?" he asked, handing it to her.

Meredith smiled at their blobby little baby, tracing her fingers over the outline of his or her tiny face. "No, I'm not," she whispered. No matter how many times she looked at photos of their baby, she was still overcome with awe.

Dr. Halloran knocked briefly, then entered the exam room holding Meredith's chart. "Hello again," she greeted happily. "How are you doing? Twelve weeks now, right?"

"I feel good," Meredith said, holding onto Derek's hand. "No spotting. Morning sickness tapered off a little, which is a relief. And there's...definitely a bump this time," she smiled.

"Excellent. Pregnancy really seems to be agreeing with you," Dr. Halloran complimented as she washed her hands off.

Meredith giggled a little. "Good."

"So you've gained two pounds, which is normal. Now that the baby is really starting to grow, you'll probably be gaining an average of two or three pounds per month," she explained. "And now that you'll be entering the second trimester soon, I'd like to schedule more frequent visits. Every three weeks now instead of four, just to keep on track."

"Okay," Meredith agreed. "That's fine."

"Feeling any movement yet?" Dr. Halloran asked as she turned on the ultrasound monitor.

"Sometimes. Like tiny popcorn popping " Meredith replied, smiling at Derek, whose face was covered with pride. Even wiggling around in utero was worth a medal in their eyes.

The doctor nodded encouragingly. "That's great. Once those little legs grow, expect lots of stretching and kicking," she laughed.

"Can't wait," Meredith said.

"At this stage, we should be able to see everything on an abdominal ultrasound," Dr. Halloran said. "If you'd like to lie back, we can get started."

"Okay." Meredith laid back on the exam table and lifted her shirt just below her bra, gasping as the doctor squirt the gel onto her abdomen. Derek squeezed her hand in anticipation, jitters getting the best of both of them.

Dr. Halloran moved the wand around her lower belly, focusing in on her uterus. "Here we go. I'll turn on the 4-d video so we can see a clear image," she began. "Baby's right here, definitely much bigger than last time, about the size of a lime."

Derek gazed at the screen and smiled. "Blueberry isn't really a blueberry anymore, Mer."

Meredith wiped a tear from her eye and giggled. She was never one to cry at stuff like this, but one look at their baby moving around inside her, and the waterworks turned on immediately. "Blueberry actually looks like a baby."

"Oh, look at that!" the doctor said. "Baby is moving its arms back and forth."

Two little arms waved back and forth across the monitor, clumsily up and down. Tiny lime baby, hard at work. "Oh my God," Meredith whispered, staring intently at the screen. "Is he...she...the baby rubbing her eyes?"

"Yep," Dr. Halloran nodded. "The baby is just becoming sensitive to light, so when they rub their eyelids, it's their way of getting used to the new environment and learning reflexes" she explained.

"That's incredible," Derek said softly. "Even the face is clear. God, Mer, look at that," he gasped.

"The baby has prominent facial features now. But it's still too early to tell whether he or she looks like mom or dad yet," the doctor said, smiling. "Baby's muscles are much more developed now; see how the knees are bending a little?" she pointed.

Meredith took the tissue Derek handed her and dabbed at her teary eyes. "Wow," she choked out. "There's really a little human in there."

"A perfect little human," Derek whispered, pressing a kiss above her ear.

"Umbilical cord and placenta are getting plenty of blood. The baby's bladder even started making urine this week," Dr. Halloran said with a smile. "Impressive, huh?"

Derek and Meredith both laughed in unison. "Very impressive," he agreed, wiping his own tears from his face.

"Genitalia is forming, but right now, it's mostly internal, so sneaking a peek between the legs isn't going to show us much just yet," the doctor explained. "Baby is right on track developmentally. Heartbeat is strong and healthy," she said, pointing to the flashing white flicker in the baby's chest. "Would you like to hear it?"

"Yes, please," Meredith replied eagerly. She turned and smiled at her husband, and he kissed the top of her hand.

Dr. Halloran clicked on the vicinity around the baby's chest, and a fast-paced, constant _woosh woosh woosh_ filled the exam room. Both Meredith and Derek gasped audibly at the sound, and a flood of tears fell from both of their eyes. This moment was everything to them. The sound of their baby's heartbeat was beautiful. Proof that everything they'd ever been through was worth it, even for this one moment.

"Meredith," Derek breathed, his eyes focused on the flicker and his ears on the thudding echoing all around them.

"I know," Meredith whispered. If it weren't for the cold blue gel on her belly, she would have reached down and splayed her fingers over it, silently connecting with their baby. Instead, she just held Derek's hand tighter and kept her eyes on the monitor, watching every movement and listening to the continuous, comforting beating heart beat inside their baby's chest, inside her. The reality was so much better than anything they could have ever thought of themselves.

Dr. Halloran palpated Meredith's abdomen, softly pressing her fingertips into her skin for measurements. "I can definitely feel your uterus now. It's starting to protrude over your pubic bone. Good shape, good size. Baby, too. Everything looks great," she approved, gently wiping the gel off Meredith's abdomen.

Meredith sat up on the exam table and smoothed out her shirt. "Great, thank you," she smiled, wiping away the last of her few lingering tears.

"My pleasure," Dr. Halloran replied. "Pictures and another DVD?" she assumed.

Derek laughed. "Yes, please. If it wouldn't be too much trouble."

"Not at all," she said. "And it even has sound, so you can hear the heartbeat over and over again."

"Really?" Meredith asked hopefully.

"Absolutely. That's a huge hit with parents," she winked.

"I'd imagine so," Derek agreed, kissing the top of his wife's head.

Meredith leaned into him and smiled. "So, we'll see you again for week fifteen?" she asked the doctor.

"Yep. You might even get to find out the sex. Fifteen weeks is early, but sometimes, we get lucky and are able to determine the gender--that is, if you want to find out," Dr. Halloran explained.

"We haven't decided yet," Derek chuckled. "We might have to close our eyes if we want to be surprised."

"That works, too," the doctor laughed. "Okay, I'll be right back with your video and pictures." She scribbled her name down in the chart and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

Meredith hopped off the table and Derek immediately wrapped his arms around her. "Our baby is amazing, Mer," he murmured into her hair.

She smiled against his chest. "Hmm...I know."

"I love you so much," Derek said, trailing his fingers up and down her spine. "And our little lime baby that rubs her eyes."

"Me too." Meredith tilted her chin towards his and kissed him, savoring the feeling of their lips pressed together.

He laid his hand on top of her belly, which was just starting to show through her shirt the tiniest bit, and felt her heat radiating onto his palm. "We made a person, Meredith."

Meredith giggled. "Crazy, isn't it?"

"Very," Derek agreed.

"Here you go," Dr. Halloran said upon entering the room again. "3-d images and your 4-d video."

Derek smiled graciously. "Thank you."

"Not a problem," she said. "So, I'll see you in three weeks. That puts us into the second week of December."

"Sounds good," Meredith nodded, slipping her coat on before grabbing her bag off the chair. "Just call and let us know what day works for you. I'm sure we'll be here anyway," she giggled.

Dr. Halloran laughed. "Okay, see you then."

Meredith and Derek walked down the OB floor toward the elevator, flipping through their stack of pictures when they bumped into Bailey, who was just coming out of a patient room. "Oh. Hi," Meredith greeted, smiling at her former resident.

"Just coming from your ultrasound?" she asked, shifting her chart from one arm to the other.

Derek nodded proudly. "Yep. Our child is perfect, by the way," he grinned, showing off one of their many new photos.

Bailey smiled as she looked at the ultrasound picture he handed her. "Looks like a beautiful baby to me," she concurred. "Did you get to hear the heartbeat?"

"Yeah," Meredith breathed. "I still have goosebumps from that..."

"One of the more profound moments in life," Bailey said.

"Really is." Derek kissed Meredith's temple and accepted the photo Bailey handed back to him. "Working all day?" he asked.

Bailey shook her head. "No, half day. Tucker and I are taking little Tuck to get his three year old pictures taken. You're still a little far off from that. Those are the easy pictures," she laughed, pointing to the stack of ultrasound photos in Meredith's hand. "No crying or refusing to smile or pulling shoes off. Enjoy it."

Meredith giggled. "We are, believe me."

"Alright, I'll see you both on Monday. And congratulations. You made it to three months without killing him," Bailey said, cocking her head toward Derek.

"We're both grateful for that," Derek joked.

He and Meredith finally got into an elevator and pressed the button for the first floor. "I could never kill you," Meredith smirked. "Then who would feed me and give me sex?"

"Good point," he chuckled. "Are you hungry? We can stop and get food on the way home."

"Actually, all I want to do is go home, eat pickles out of the jar, have sex a few times, and watch our baby rub his eyes and listen to his heartbeat," Meredith said as she slipped the video and the pictures into her bag to protect them from the November rainstorm going on outside.

"Now it's a boy?" Derek asked amusedly.

Meredith patted her small bump and smiled at her husband. "I don't know; I change it every five minutes."

The elevator doors opened on the second floor, and once again, Mark was there to greet them. "Do you just ride the elevator all day and cash your checks on payday?" Derek teased, stepping over so Mark could stand beside him.

"The hospital is crazy today. Be grateful you're both off," Mark countered, running a hand through his hair. "How's my in-utero protégé?"

Meredith rolled her eyes and giggled. "She's good. Growing and moving around. Making pee. _And_ rubbing her eyes," she added proudly.

"Let's see," Mark prompted, holding out his hand and waiting for pictures.

She handed him the stack from her bag. "Notice the bent knees," Meredith pointed. "Our child is clearly a genius."

"Obviously," Mark agreed, grinning. "You two gonna find out what it is?"

"We're not sure yet," Derek answered. "What's your vote?"

"The anticipation would drive me crazy. I'd probably find out," Mark shrugged, looking at each and every picture. "Hey, look at that!"

Meredith's eyes grew curious. "What?" she asked as they stepped off the elevator.

"You can kinda see the baby's ass if you squint a little," he said, pointing to a slightly turned image of their baby.

They both peered at the picture and smiled upon seeing the aforementioned body part. "Of course you'd notice that," Derek chuckled.

"That's adorable," Meredith all but squealed, holding it up to the light for a clearer view. "Der, our baby has butt cheeks," she smiled boastfully.

Derek laughed and pressed a kiss to her temple as she examined the picture. "I'd hope so," he said. "This one is definitely going on the fridge."

"Oh, by the way, Mom called. She said she tried calling you but she couldn't get through," Mark said.

"I turned my phone off during the appointment. What's up?" Derek asked.

Mark looked at another of their many photos and shrugged. "Something about going there for Thanksgiving."

Derek's eyes went wide at how nonchalant Mark was in his mentioning. "Oh, that's all?" he said sarcastically. "Well, what did you say?"

"I told her I already made plans to eat with Bridget's family that day, but that I didn't know what you two were up to," Mark explained. "I bought you some time."

Meredith bit her lip and looked to Derek. "Thanksgiving is next week," she said. "Do we--should we go?"

"Uh..." Derek stalled. "I dunno. Up to you."

"Well, I know your mom probably wants to see us, especially now," she said, gesturing to her belly. "But I don't even know if we could."

Mark finished proudly admiring the photos of his little niece or nephew, then handed the pile back to Meredith. "Well, I have to be in surgery in twenty minutes," he said. "Even if you decide not to go to Thanksgiving, at least call Mom back so she knows I relayed the message..."

"Okay," Derek chuckled. "See you later." He turned to Meredith and sighed. "Are you up to traveling?"

"Yeah, I don't mind that. It's just a matter of getting time off," Meredith frowned. "The Chief is already going easy on me since we told him I'm pregnant. I don't want to take advantage."

"We can make it up. It's not a big deal," Derek said simply. "But if you just wanted to have a quiet Thanksgiving at home, that's fine too. Either way, I'm happy."

Meredith knew how important family was to Derek, and now his family was her family, too. And Derek's mom would be thrilled to see them, and the new addition growing inside her. "Let's go. It would make your mom happy."

"Are you sure?" Derek asked.

"We should see them before I have the baby, and I'd rather fly out there before I'm huge and ready to push it out," she giggled. "As long as we can get a flight, I'm fine with it."

Derek leaned in and kissed her, then laced his fingers through hers. "Okay."

"While I'm consuming an entire jar of pickles, you can book the flight. Then we can have sex, then watch our baby video," Meredith said as they braced themselves for the cold rain pouring down in sheets outside.

"What is it with you and pickles?"

"They're amazing," was all she said.

"Okay..." he said mockingly, putting up the umbrella when they reached the foyer.

Meredith ducked beneath it with him and kissed his cheek. "They are," she insisted.

Derek chuckled. "Okay."

**I turned 21 on Wednesday. Reviews make awesome gifts. Just saying… ;)**


	78. A Reason to be Grateful

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't be freaking out over this season finale. Seriously, if Meredith and Derek are having a baby, my biggest dream will have come true. I cannot even comprehend the amazingness of this, guys! Here's to hoping! **

Another Thanksgiving was upon them. A day filled with too much eating and too much family time. But as Meredith and Derek walked up the front steps of his childhood home, 7418 Applewood Lane, all either of them could do was smile. Life had blessed them in a huge way this year, and they were constantly reminded of that every time they looked at Meredith's belly.

"Nervous?" Derek asked, his right hand in hers and his left on the doorknob, ready to enter the house.

Meredith shook her head. "No, not this time," she said softly.

"Good." As soon as Derek turned the knob, his mother ran into in the foyer, anxious to greet them, and to sneak a peek at the newest family member whose current residence was Meredith's uterus.

"Meredith! Derek!" Linda greeted, tossing her dish towel over her shoulder and immediately pulling them both toward her for a hug.

Derek smiled widely at his mother's embrace. This moment made him glad they flew across the country at dawn on Thanksgiving to come visit. "Hi, Mom."

"How are you doing? I'm sorry; you two must have gotten up so early to make it here. But I'm so glad you came," she said, kissing each of their cheeks.

"It's fine," Meredith assured her, running her hand over her belly.

Linda's eyes were instantly drawn to it and she gasped. "Oh my goodness!" she said, in awe of her daughter-in-law's pregnant belly. "Look at you; you look beautiful, sweetheart."

Meredith blushed a little and bit her lip. "Thank you."

"Can I...?" Linda asked, placing a tentative hand in the air before she placed it on Meredith's barely there bump.

"Oh, sure," Meredith agreed. She looked over to Derek, who grinned proudly at her. These days, she was used to people touching her belly. Izzie did it nearly every morning at work. And she knew that the bigger she got, the more hands would be magnetized to her belly.

Tears gathered in Derek's mother's eyes and she smiled. "Can you feel the baby move sometimes?"

"A little, yeah," Meredith nodded. "It's the most incredible thing I've ever felt."

"I remember Derek kicked me a lot. So watch out for those legs," Linda laughed, wiping a tear from her cheek.

Derek trailed his fingers up and down Meredith's back, noticing how she leaned into him, her body tired from traveling. Just as he was about to suggest they go relax upstairs for a few minutes, a flock of family members came in from outside.

"Derek! Meredith!" Kathleen said happily, balancing four year old Morgan on her hip. "It's so good to see you guys."

"Hi, Kath," Derek said, kissing his sister's cheek. "Hey, Morgan. You got so big! How old are you now? Thirteen? Fourteen?"

Morgan laughed and her blonde pigtails swayed as she shook her head. "Uncle Derek, I'm four."

"No boyfriends yet, right?" he asked with a serious face.

"No," the little girl shrieked with laughter. "Boys are gross."

Derek grinned at his niece. "Yes, we are. We're covered in cooties. Don't ever forget that, 'kay?"

"Okay," Morgan agreed.

"You look beautiful, Meredith. Congratulations, you guys," Kathleen said with a genuine smile. "You brought ultrasound pictures, right? We're all dying to see them."

"Yep, we did," Meredith replied. "We have about a million."

"Aunt Meredith, when you have the baby, can I hold it?" Morgan asked with hopeful eyes.

Meredith giggled. "Sure, sweetie."

The rest of the family said their hellos and gave hugs, one by one. Nancy, Liz, Amy, husbands, nieces and nephews. By the time they made it through the group, nearly an hour had passed and Meredith's feet were shifting back and forth with the need to sit down, not to mention the fact that she really needed to pee.

Derek managed to find a break in the midst of the conversations going on all around them and excused himself and Meredith for a few minutes while they settled in upstairs. He grabbed their shared suitcase and Meredith's tote bag, and followed her up the steps into Derek's childhood bedroom where they'd be spending the next two nights.

As soon as they entered, Meredith kicked her shoes off and made a beeline for the bathroom. Derek chuckled; she was an incredibly tolerant pregnant woman, given their baby was calling all the shots twenty-four seven.

When she emerged, her jeans were still unbuttoned and she pulled them down her legs. "I think I need to buy new pants. Do most women have bellies like this at thirteen weeks?"

"You're cursed with a petite frame," Derek chuckled. "I love that you're showing so early, and we get to see what we made."

Meredith smiled at her husband. "Yeah, me too," she said. "But I need to wear pants to Thanksgiving dinner..."

"Here, what about these?" Derek suggested, pulling a pair of her comfy gray track pants from their suitcase, ones that she typically wore to bed. "No one ever gets dressed up for Thanksgiving here. Exhibit A, Amy's NYU hoodie."

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked.

"Mer, you're pregnant. You have more of an excuse than anyone," Derek pointed out, chuckling.

Meredith bit her lip and accepted the pants from him. "Fine," she agreed, hopping into them. "But if Nancy makes a comment, I'm blaming you."

"Don't worry about Nancy. She doesn't care what you wear. She likes you," he countered.

She laid back on the bed and yawned. Waking up and getting on a plane before sunrise had worn her out. If it weren't Thanksgiving, Meredith knew she'd be asleep by now. "Okay," she said incredulously, reaching for the picture of a five year old Derek and his dad from the nightstand.

Derek reclined onto the bed next to her and smiled sadly. He knew his father would have loved Meredith, and would have been thrilled about their baby on the way. It was all very bittersweet.

"If we have a boy, I hope he looks just like you," Meredith said softly, smiling when Derek lifted up her shirt a little and placed his warm hand on her abdomen.

"And you," Derek chuckled.

He kissed her cheek and she inched closer to him. "I'm glad we decided to come. It's...I like seeing you with your family...how happy you are."

"I would have been happy no matter where we were. As long as I'm with you and Blueberry, life is good," Derek grinned.

Meredith's smile brightened a little and she turned her head toward Derek's. "Week thirteen now." She reached over the side of the bed, grabbing the pregnancy week by week book from the bag and flipping to the next section. "Do we have time to read?"

"We snuck up here sight unseen. I doubt they even know we're gone," he joked, wrapping his arm around her as they sat up and leaned against the headboard.

"Okay," Meredith laughed. "Fingerprints have formed on your baby's tiny fingertips, marking her unique from the rest of the world. Her organs and veins are visible through her still thickening skin. And the size of her body is starting to catch up with her head. Additionally, nearly all her teeth have formed in her gums, and her vocal cords continue to develop. If your baby is a girl, she now has more than two million eggs in her ovaries. At thirteen weeks gestation, your baby is the size of a peach, is approximately three inches long, and weighs almost an ounce," she read aloud.

She set the book on her lap and stared down at her belly. "I think I have a whole fruit basket growing in there sometimes," Meredith giggled. "I'm already a blimp and the baby is the size of a peach..."

"You're not a blimp," he reassured her.

"Well, I will be," she upheld. "It's weird...you learn all of this in med school, but when it's your own baby, you're proud of things like fingerprints and teeth and ovaries and all of these amazing things the baby is doing," Meredith sighed contentedly, resting her head on Derek's shoulder.

"It's incredible," Derek whispered. He pulled their wooden frames from Meredith's tote bag, the pictures they kept on their nightstands at home, and handed her one of them. "I'm so in love with our peach-sized baby," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled as she admired the 3-d picture in the frame. "Me too."

Derek could see her eyelids becoming heavy, her body exhausted from the long trip, so he smiled at her. "Dinner isn't until five. Why don't you sleep for a while? It's only two; I'll wake you up," he offered.

"You sure?" she asked.

He took a flannel blanket from the bottom of the bed and draped it over her. "Positive," he said. "And here, I know how much this amuses you..." Derek pulled his old Spiderman-pillowcased pillow from beneath the made bed and handed it to Meredith, who giggled when she saw it.

"I do love this," she said with a sleepy smile, hugging onto it and breathing in the boyish scent that remained in the threads. "Thank you."

"Do you want me to stay with you? 'Cause I will," he offered.

Meredith shook her head and reached for the picture frame, resting it on top of the pillow. "No, I'm fine. Go chat and bond and be Uncle Derek," she giggled.

"Okay." Derek leaned down and kissed her lips a few times, then kissed her forehead for good measure. "If you need me, I'm right downstairs."

"'Kay," Meredith yawned. "Love you."

"I love you, too," he said softly.

Derek gently clicked the bedroom door shut and walked down the steps, the hustle and bustle infiltrating his ears as soon as he reached the landing. He smiled; despite the noise, it was good to be home with his family for a few days.

He dropped down on the couch next to his sister, Amy, who was holding one year old Kyle on her lap.

"Where's Mer?" she asked. "She okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine. Just taking a nap. The baby wears her out," Derek chuckled, running his hand through the dark curls on Kyle's head, ones that were inherent to the Shepherd DNA.

"I can imagine," Linda said sympathetically. "Is work okay? You both look so tired, dear..."

Derek nodded. "She's trying to cut back a little at the hospital. Easier said than done, but it's tough. She's a fourth year resident; time off isn't easy to come by," he sighed. "I'm trying to work more so I can build up vacation time for when she has the baby. We still have six months to go, but I want to make sure I'm able to take off, too."

"You get paternity leave, right?" Amy asked.

"Yeah. Because we both work at the hospital, Mer and I are both entitled to time off. Normally, extended maternity leave is five weeks, but Richard was able to pull some strings and get us two months, which is..._a lot_, so we're really lucky. There's a new neuro guy transferring to Mercy West from Hopkins, so he's going to fill in for me until the spot is ready for him over there, so it works out for everyone."

"Oh, that's good!" Linda smiled. "Those first few months are precious. Exhausting, but something you definitely don't want to miss a second of."

"Yeah, that's why we wanted the time off. We still get paid, thankfully. With a newborn, we definitely need money coming in," he chuckled. "But honestly, they could fire me, and I still wouldn't want to miss out on that time. The baby comes first. And Richard...he owes Meredith that much," Derek said.

Linda took a sip of her coffee and nodded. "Well, that's good. You both should take off as much time as you can."

"Are you excited about becoming a daddy?" Amy asked with a smile.

Kyle reached out his arms to Derek, who scooped him up and put him on his own lap. "Of course," he grinned, kissing his nephew's cheek. "I'm excited to see Mer and the baby together. She's gonna be such a good mom." Derek felt the tears well up in his eyes, and he tried to blink them away before his sister or mother noticed.

"Oh, sweetheart," Linda said softly. "I'm so happy for you two."

Derek smiled a little. "You know, I gave up on kids years ago. Addie...she never really wanted them. So I sort of resigned myself to the idea that I'd never be a father. But then...Mer, she just, she changed all of that. For the first time in...a long time, I had hope. _She_ gave me hope," he said, glancing down to the wedding band on his finger. "And now she's pregnant, and I just..." A few tears sprung to his eyes and he let them fall down his face, no longer concerned about who saw. "I love her so much. And our baby."

His mother wiped his tears away with her thumbs and kissed his temple. "We love them, too."

Linda cleared her throat and paused before speaking again. "Does...Meredith's father know?" she asked gently. "It's just...I know they don't have the easiest..."

Derek nodded. "Yeah, we told him last week. He was thrilled." He glanced down at the floor somberly. "I know he's always felt guilty about not being there for her when she was growing up. So this is his chance to make things right again. We're not gonna keep the baby from him. If he wants to be involved, do the grandpa thing, then we want it, too. Plus, Mer's half sister and her husband have a daughter. She's almost three. So having a cousin close by will be nice," he explained.

"Good," Linda said encouragingly. "I'm glad to hear that. I'm sure it's not easy for Meredith, but you all seem to be making the effort, which is wonderful."

"Mer's been great about it. I left it up to her--you know, as far as letting her father be part of everything, and she really wants him to be. For the baby's sake, I think it's a good thing," Derek said, slipping Kyle's sock back on after it came off.

Amy nodded in concurrence. "It is. It's good for kids to have family. You guys are doing the right thing." She patted Derek's knee and smiled. "I can't believe my big brother is finally having a baby of his own. Took you long enough."

Derek laughed. It was true, but still, he wouldn't change anything. He and Meredith waited until the right time, and they couldn't be happier. "Saved the best for last," he teased. All fifteen of his nieces and nephews were perfect in Derek's eyes, but he knew already that his and Meredith's baby--and the ones to come later down the line--would take the cake.

...

They were all gathered around the large Shepherd family dining room table. Meredith held Derek's hand on her lap as they said grace, and afterward, he pressed a comforting kiss to her cheek. She looked noticeably more rested since getting in a nap, and for that, they were both grateful, seeing as they were probably going to be put on the hotseat during dinner because of the excitement over the baby, and because Mark wasn't here, they would more than likely be answering all of their Bridget questions.

Sure enough, before anyone could even say 'pass the stuffing,' Kathleen jumped right in. "So...this Bridget? What's she like?"

Derek rolled his eyes amusedly at his older sister. "Jeez, Kath. My plate is still empty and you're already grilling us," he joked. "She's great. Good head on her shoulders, really sweet. I think they're perfect for each other."

"You think so?" Linda asked hopefully.

Meredith nodded, smiling at her husband as he spooned some mashed potatoes onto each of their plates. "I do. He's different around her. And the way he talks about her...I've just never seen him that way before. We really love them together."

"Thank God." Nancy breathed a sigh of relief. "You never know with him, but if you two think she's the one, then I'm sold."

"Is that sarcastic Nancy, or genuine Nancy?" Derek asked. Because really, even to this day, he could never be sure which was which.

Nancy scoffed. "Shut up. Of course I'm being serious. You care about him just as much as we do. So if you feel good about it, then so do we."

"Okay, then," Derek smirked. "Just checking."

"They're flying out for Christmas, so we'll finally get to meet her," Liz said as she filled up her daughter's juice cup.

"You'll love her," Derek assured the rest of his family. He knew Mark would defend him if the situation was reversed, so as annoying as the questioning was, he had no choice but to be Mark's representative. Still though, he was relieved when Amy moved the conversation elsewhere.

"So do you think you're gonna find out the sex?" Amy asked them with a smile.

"I don't know. That's still...open for discussion," Derek chuckled. "We want to have everything ready...you know, the nursery and clothes and pinks or blues and all that stuff, but it would be fun to be surprised, too."

"Any preference?" John, Nancy's husband, asked.

Meredith shook her head honestly. "No, boy or girl, we're happy." She laughed. "When I'm in labor, that'll probably be the last thing on my mind."

"Derek was a big baby," Linda added. "Eight pounds, twelve ounces. But he slimmed out as soon as he was born. He had these tiny little chicken legs--"

Derek groaned in embarrassment. "Mom, please..."

"Oh, we're your family. It doesn't matter," Linda pointed out.

Meredith giggled, patting Derek's thigh. "I love those pictures. I told Derek that if we have a boy, I hope he looks just like him. He was adorable."

"Uncle Derek, what're you gonna name the baby?" Sammy asked from her place next to her Aunt Meredith, whom the little girl adored.

"We don't know yet, hun," Derek smiled at his niece. "What would you name the baby?"

"Uh..." Sammy thought long and hard for a minute before she spoke. "Cinderella."

"We'll definitely add that to the list," Meredith assured her, not that they had even begun to think about names yet.

"Cinderella Shepherd. That's very pretty," Derek grinned, winking at Meredith.

"No Derek Jr. if it's a boy?" Liz asked.

Derek shook his head. "Life is hectic enough. That'll just cause mass confusion," he chuckled. "He can have his own name."

"Any names picked out yet?" Tom asked as he fed Kyle.

"So far, Cinderella is our front-runner," Meredith giggled, taking a bite of turkey. She felt the barely noticeable popcorn popping inside her, always the tell-tale sign of the baby wiggling around, and her hand went to her belly.

"Moving around in there?" Derek asked. It didn't matter how many times a day it happened; everything their baby did made them proud.

Meredith smiled down at her tiny bump under her shirt. "Yep."

"Can I feel?" Sammy asked excitedly.

"Sure, sweetie." Meredith took her niece's hand and placed it a little beneath her belly button. "Right here," she said, gently pressing Sammy's fingertips into her skin. "Feel that?"

Sammy gasped and her eyes grew wide in surprise. "I feel it! I feel it!"

"Pretty cool, isn't it?" Derek asked, a wide grin on his face.

"Yeah," Sammy whispered in awe. "Does Cinderella do that a lot?"

"Every day," Meredith giggled. "Cinderella is very busy."

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's shoulders and kissed her temple. "Cinderella likes to make herself known every once in a while," he said jokingly.

"You brought the ultrasound pictures with you, right?" Linda asked.

"Upstairs," Derek replied. "Those took up nearly half the suitcase," he teased.

"Already proud parents," Kathleen said, smiling at her little brother and his wife from across the table.

Meredith leaned into Derek and sighed contentedly. "We are."

...

"Oh, these are adorable," Linda beamed, as another ultrasound photo was passed to her from the rest of her family sitting around the living room, taking turns looking at all of them.

Derek sipped his coffee, the grin never leaving his face. "Cute, right?"

"Very," Nancy agreed, handing off the current picture to John and receiving one from Liz. "Oh wow, you can see the baby's butt in this one," she laughed.

"Yes, Mark was quick to point that out to us," Meredith giggled, strumming her belly with her fingers as she sat next to Derek on the couch.

"Very cute butt," Derek said boastfully, taking a bite of the cherry pie resting on his lap.

"So if you wanted to find out the sex, when could you?" Rob, Kathleen's husband, asked them.

Meredith let Derek answer as she chewed on her slice of apple pie. "Two weeks from now. Our doctor said it might be a little early, but we might get to sneak a peek if we want to."

"You should find out," Amy blurted.

"Yeah? And why is that?" Derek chuckled.

"So we can send you things...like pink dresses or tiny baseball jerseys. Making us wait until May would just be cruel," she tried to point out convincingly, though Derek knew how excited his sisters would be to go shopping for their brother's baby.

"We're torn," Meredith sighed amusedly. "We'll probably just end up flipping a coin the day of the appointment."

"Your dad and I found out with all of you," Linda told them nostalgically. "Imagine our surprise when we saw a penis on the screen after two consecutive daughters..."

All five of the Shepherd children groaned, and Derek's mortification was written all over his face. "Mom, why?" he said pitifully, pinching the bridge of his nose in horror.

Meredith rubbed Derek's back consolingly, trying to keep from laughing. "Oh, relax," she couldn't help but giggle. "You're a doctor in a room full of doctors."

Derek ran his hand through his hair and heaved a heavy sigh. "And you wonder why I don't visit more often..." he joked.

Family. They drove him nuts, but still, he loved them.

...

"I'm exhausted," Meredith said as she and Derek walked out of the attached bathroom leading into Derek's bedroom. "We definitely would have had shower sex if we didn't fly across the country today."

"That's okay. Showering with you, sex or no sex, is still fun," he smiled. "Besides, when your mother mentions your penis in front of an entire living room full of people? Kinda kills the mood..." Derek hoisted the suitcase full of their clothes up onto the bed so they could rummage through for something to wear. It had been a long day, and finally getting the chance to crawl under the covers was all they could think about.

"Aww." Meredith pulled her panties, socks, a pair of pajama bottoms and a tee shirt of Derek's that she'd packed for herself from the suitcase then dropped her towel, letting it pool at her feet. Derek looked over and smirked at her. She wasn't trying to be sexy, but still, he loved when she did that.

"Don't even think about McDreamy-ing me into sex," she warned teasingly, pulling her panties up her legs, followed by her pants.

Derek laughed as he slipped on some boxers. "What? I didn't do anything."

"Mmhmm..." Meredith said disbelievingly. She unzipped the side compartment and took out her tub of cocoa butter. "I'm too tired to rub this on myself," she giggled.

"I'll do it," Derek offered, pulling his tee shirt over his head.

She smiled cheekily at her husband. "Probably not a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Because that would lead to sex. And I'm way too tired for sex," Meredith said, scooping some of the lotion into her palms, then massaging it into her breasts and belly to prevent stretch marks. Not the most glamorous nighttime routine, but a necessary one.

"Me too," Derek admitted. "For the record, though, you look beautiful right now."

Meredith looked to him incredulously. "I'm rubbing cream on myself. Not the sexiest visual," she laughed.

"Still sexy," he corrected, peeling back the covers on the bed.

"I have a belly full of Thanksgiving food. And a belly full of baby," she yawned. She capped the lid on the cocoa butter, put on Derek's shirt, and crawled into bed next to him.

Derek hugged her close under the covers. After a long day, there really was nothing better than alone time with Meredith. "I love you," he whispered into her hair.

She tilted her chin towards Derek, kissing him a few times in succession before pulling back and smiling at him. "I love you, too."

"I'm glad we came," Derek said. "It's nice to see everyone. And Blueberry Cinderella is clearly the new family favorite," he chuckled, running his fingers through her damp hair from showering.

"Well, obviously," Meredith laughed. "Because our baby is awesome."

"Very."

Their hands went to her belly, and stayed there while they slept. Thanksgiving was a time to count blessings, and not a day went by where they weren't grateful for the little miracle growing inside her.


	79. Today Has Been Okay Pt 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**So sorry this wasn't posted earlier! It completely slipped my mind. Anyway, enjoy!**

The alarm went off at six o'clock sharp, instantly and unhappily pulling them from their much needed sleep. After a night spent on call, one that included bloody traumas and harrowing surgeries and their consequential two AM bedtime as a result, they could both sense this wasn't going to be a pleasant day.

Derek quickly reached over and shut it off on his desk. The few days of blissful Thanksgiving vacation were over, and work was back in full force, kicking off the holiday season to an always hectic start.

Meredith groaned into her pillow. "No no no," she pleaded out loud. "This is already not a good day. It feels like we just went to bed."

"That's because we did," Derek yawned. He sat up, ran a hand through his unruly hair, and sighed. "Maybe we could sleep in and no one would notice."

Meredith laughed tiredly. "Me? Maybe. You, the fancy neuro god? No."

Derek smiled at his wife. "Fancy neuro god, huh?" he boasted, folding their office bed back into the couch.

"Yep," she yawned, grabbing their toothbrushes and tube of toothpaste from Derek's desk drawer.

She draped her hand over her belly, still unnoticeable under her scrubs, as they left the office and walked toward the newly revamped attending lounge, down the hall from Derek's office. Normally, it was off limits to residents, but because Meredith knew nearly all of the attendings, no one particularly cared if she entered the members only clubhouse.

Derek flipped the switch, warm yellow lighting instantly flooding the room. The resident lounge was definitely a huge step up from the intern locker room, but the attending lounge put them both to shame. Fancy coffee pots, leather couches, showers, sinks, microwaves, a big screen TV, cubbies that actually had doors...a surgeon's paradise.

"Okay, seriously, who actually has time to watch TV and lie around on the couches," Meredith said. "I'm lucky if I get a pee break every five hours..."

"Beats me," Derek said with a sigh. "Seattle Grace could've hired two new doctors with the money the board put into this."

Meredith squirt some toothpaste onto each of their brushes. "Yeah, I know," she said, then began scrubbing her teeth.

"Morning, sunshines," Mark said groggily as he pushed the door to the lounge open, his countenance just as tired as theirs.

"Hey," Derek said with a mouth full of foam. He spit into the sink and turned to his friend. "You look refreshed," he joked.

Mark laughed, running a hand through his hair. "So do you." He dropped down onto the brown leather couch and rubbed his eyes. "What time did you two get to sleep?"

"A little after two," Meredith answered as she continued scrubbing away. "You?"

"Same," Mark said. "Only I spent the night in an on-call room. No fancy little hotel room-office you've got."

Derek rinsed his mouth and chuckled. "Next time, we'll invite you for a sleepover."

"That'd be great, thanks," Mark kidded back. He put his feet up on the coffee table, arms behind his head. "I should've slept in here. It's a freaking palace. Seriously, have you sat on these couches? My ass feels spoiled."

"Thanks for the visual," Derek said sarcastically, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand as he surveyed himself in the mirror.

Meredith gargled, spit, and rinsed her own toothbrush off. "We should lock the door and just hide out in here all day."

"Let's do it. Me, you two, McNugget in there...I'll order a pizza," Mark said jokingly, tossing his coffee cup into a nearby trash can.

Derek ran his hand over his stubbled cheeks, making a mental note to shave. Sleep trumped his beauty routine lately, and he was pretty sure that Meredith would start refusing kisses in a few days if he didn't. "When are you gonna stop calling our child that?" he asked, humored.

"Too late. Kid's already got a nickname for life," Mark shrugged.

"Great," Meredith smirked. Just as she was about to seize the opportunity of the few minutes they had before rounds and sit down on the couches Mark was so fond of, all three of their pagers blared through the room. Free time was officially over.

"911," Derek read. "It's not even six thirty in the morning, and there's already a trauma coming in..."

"Told you today was going to suck," Meredith reminded him as the three left the comforts of the lounge and headed toward the elevator. Her stomach grumbled in want of food. The baby always on her mind now, she knew she had to eat first, even with the potential surgeries waiting for her downstairs. "I need to eat something," she told them, stepping onto the elevator.

"Okay, I'll meet you down there," Derek smiled, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

Meredith scrunched her nose at her husband. "You need to shave," she all but ordered, stepping off at the third floor to pick up something at the food cart.

Derek smiled as the doors closed on the other side. "It's on my to-do-list," he assured her, winking.

The two descended the elevator down to the pit, bracing themselves for what they might see when they walked through the doors. There was never any telling what might roll through at any given moment. After getting gowned up, the put on their doctor faces and entered.

"What happened?" Mark asked loudly to no one in particular, hoping someone would fill them in on the details.

Alex walked by as he wheeled a gurney into one of the trauma bays. "Fire at an apartment complex," he said quickly.

"Dr. Sloan, I have a burn victim over here," Izzie called out from one of the patient beds.

Mark sighed. "Good luck," he said before walking over to his new patient.

"Yeah, you too," Derek returned. He scanned the charts at the nurses' station in search of a patient that may need his attention, and jumped a little in surprise when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

Meredith handed him a cup of coffee and smiled. "Hey," she greeted, simultaneously chewing on her cinnamon raisin bagel. "Busy in here."

"Apartment fire," Derek explained as he took a sip of the coffee. "Stick by me. There might be a neuro case we need to scrub in on."

"Okay." She handed him the other half of her bagel and chugged down some orange juice. It was a quick breakfast, but it would do the trick.

"You eat it," Derek said.

"You eat it," Meredith echoed. "You need to eat, too. Besides, if I eat too much in the mornings, Blueberry gets mad and I just end up throwing up."

Derek chuckled. She always knew how to make him smile, even in the midst of chaos. "Thank you," he said, finally accepting the bagel from her and biting into it.

"Oh, sure. You two are having a coffee date while I'm up to my eyeballs in whiny, coughing people," Cristina said, dropping off a stack of charts on the counter at the nurses' station.

Meredith pointed to her belly. "Pregnant. Need to eat," she reminded her friend, taking another sip of orange juice.

"Hmm..." Cristina groaned. She knew Meredith was right, but still. "Maybe I should get pregnant..." she teased.

Derek shoved the last of his half of the bagel into his mouth and Meredith smiled. "Have fun with that."

An hour passed, spent bandaging and debriding and picking glass shards from people. Meredith, though relieved that there didn't seem to be any serious injuries, was a little annoyed that this was her day so far. A six AM wake up call to stitch and wrap people in gauze.

Derek sighed as he signed his name on a discharge form, ready to move onto the next patient in line for care. Fancy neurosurgeon or not, he still had to do the monotonous work of an intern from time to time. He frowned when he glanced over to Meredith and noticed how pale she looked. Derek momentarily sidestepped the stack of clipboards and walked over to her.

"Mer?"

She turned around and smiled weakly at him. "Hey," she said softly, swiveling herself around to continue debriding her patient's burned arm.

"Can you excuse us for a second?" Derek asked the woman Meredith was treating. He put his hand on the small of her back and they moved to the other side of the curtain. "You feeling okay?" he asked, pressing the back of his hand to her forehead. "You don't look too good."

Meredith nodded unconvincingly. "Yeah, I'm fine. Baby doesn't like the smell of burnt flesh and is letting me know by making me nauseous," she managed to laugh. "Why? How bad to I look?"

"You don't look bad; just a little pale. Why don't you go get some fresh air outside for a few minutes? I'll take over here," Derek offered.

"Fine," she sighed. "But just know: you suck."

Derek chuckled. "Our baby will thank me," he said with a smile.

Meredith rolled her eyes amusedly and headed for the ER doors. As much as the hovering annoyed her, she knew it was probably a good idea, for the baby's sake. Once she was outside, she dropped down onto a bench, letting the cold December air fill her lungs. With only a few breaths, she felt better, and could practically feel the color returning to her cheeks.

"Sorry about the smell," she said, looking down at her belly. "Mommy would leave the pit and go back to bed, but then she'd probably get fired." Meredith leaned her head back on the hard concrete wall behind her and closed her eyes for a few moments. She probably would have fallen asleep if it weren't for the wailing of the ambulance sirens approaching.

She was immediately on alert as the ambulance pulled up to the ER and the back doors opened. A paramedic hopped out, and upon spotting Meredith, called out to her. "Were you paged?" he asked.

"Uh, sure," Meredith nodded, rising up from the bench and running to where she was needed. "What've we got?"

"Unidentified female, pulled from the lobby of the apartment complex. Found face down, unconscious, and burned pretty badly," the paramedic said quickly as the gurney was wheeled into the ER doors.

"Trauma three," Meredith instructed. She glanced over at Derek, who was just finishing up with Meredith's former patient, and waved him over for help.

Derek ripped off his old gloves, tossed them into a nearby trash can, and met up with her as soon as they entered the exam room. "What happened?"

"She must have passed out before she could leave the building. We found her unconscious at the scene. Probably suffered a fall. Obvious burns and possible broken bones; that's all we know." The paramedic handed over the chart to Meredith and left the room, passing the torch of care over to her and Derek.

Meredith stared down at the woman on the gurney and shook her head. "Okay, uh, I need some scissors to cut her clothes off," she requested of a nurse, who took a pair from the drawer and handed them to her.

While Derek examined the woman's pupils with his penlight, Meredith delicately began cutting her sweatshirt, careful not to chafe her possibly burnt skin. She felt the bile rise in her throat when she saw a baby bump, much like her own, under the woman's clothing.

"She's pregnant," Meredith sighed, defeated, running a hand through her hair.

Derek glanced at the woman's belly, then raised his eyes to meet Meredith's, which were already stinging with unshed tears. "Damn it," he whispered under his breath.

"I need to do an ultrasound," she said, her own motherly instinct immediately unleashed. Meredith wheeled over the equipment, flipped on the monitor, and quickly squirt some of the blue gel over the woman's abdomen. "Please let there be a heartbeat," she begged to no one in particular. She pressed the wand below her belly button, moving it back and forth in search of the _woosh woosh woosh_ noise, the same miraculous sound they heard with their own baby.

Only this time, there was no miracle sound. "I can't find it," Meredith said, her eyes searching Derek's frantically. "Derek."

Derek walked around to the other side of the gurney and took the wand from Meredith, trying his luck for the heartbeat they both sought to hear. He moved the wand over every possible inch of the woman's abdomen, trying to decipher a heartbeat, however faint. After nearly ten minutes, he dropped his head in defeat and handed Meredith the wand back.

"Her body's been through too much. The baby just couldn't handle it all," Derek explained, swallowing a lump in his throat and resisting the need to press his hand over Meredith's pregnant belly. Their baby was alive. Healthy. Safe inside his wife.

Meredith bit her lip solemnly, unable to take her eyes off the woman's swollen stomach. "Yeah," she said, her voice cracking as she tried to keep from crying.

"We need to schedule surgery to remove the fetus. The longer we wait, the more likely she is to contract and infection. And we need to get her into CT for a brain scan," Derek told the nurse as he turned off the monitor. After the nurse left the room, he wrapped his arm around Meredith and kissed her temple. "I know," he said soothingly, splaying his hand over her belly.

"She needs family here," Meredith said.

"I'm sure as soon as they find out, they'll be here," he assured her.

"I can't...when she wakes up, how do we tell her her baby is dead?" she asked, her stomach turning at the thought.

"You don't have to do that, Mer," Derek replied. "It's...I'll do it."

"Dr. Shepherd, they're ready for you in CT," the nurse said as she popped her head back into the room.

Derek turned his attention towards her and nodded. "Okay, thank you."

Meredith managed to cut the remainder of the woman's burnt clothing off, then she and Derek slipped her body into a hospital gown before taking her up to CT. Derek suspected their patient's unconsciousness was only temporary, and was actually glad that she wasn't coherent to know what was going on. That her body was bruised and burned, and her baby was dead. Giving news like that was the worst part of the job.

...

They sat in the CT viewing room, waiting for the woman's brain scans to come over the computer screens, when Lexie entered the sliding glass door holding a clipboard. "Hey," she said softly. "One of the nurses down in the ER asked me to come find you. We finally got in touch with her husband and he gave us her information," Lexie said.

"Thanks," Derek replied.

"Her name is Claire Chapman, thirty years old, and is...sixteen weeks pregnant," Lexie dictated.

"Was," Meredith corrected.

Lexie cocked her head, confused. "What?"

"_Was_ sixteen weeks pregnant," she stressed. "The baby died."

"Oh." Lexie's eyes traveled from Meredith's barely noticeable belly under her scrub top, then to Derek, who seemed to be thinking the same thing: _It was a bad idea for Meredith to be on this case. _"Well, that's really all he gave us over the phone. He should be here in a few hours. Is she...she's going to live?"

Derek nodded hesitantly. "She should wake up on her own, but there might be a bleed. We don't know yet," he said, gesturing to the computer screen.

"Okay," Lexie said. She placed a gentle hand on Meredith's shoulder. "Mer?"

"What?"

Lexie swallowed a lump in her throat as she sensed her sister's obvious sunken spirit. "I, um...I'm with Bailey today. Do you want to switch with me? Because I'd understand if this is-"

Meredith shook her head. "I'm fine, Lexie," she insisted.

"Mer, maybe it would be a good idea..." Derek tried to persuade her, all the while knowing that he risked getting accused of overstepping the personal-professional line. Still though, white coat or not, she was his wife. His _pregnant_ wife. So he took his chance.

She shot him her signature _'don't mess with me'_ look and he sighed. "Okay."

"Okay, well, they're prepping OR 4 for her C-section now," Lexie informed them. "I told the scrub nurses that she might need brain surgery, so they're on stand-by just in case."

"Thanks, Lexie," Derek smiled gratefully.

Lexie mirrored his smile, masked in just as much concern as Derek's, and left. "Mer..." The scans came over the screen the second he said her name, and both of their eyes went to the monitors.

"Subdural hematoma," Meredith spotted instantly, tracing over it with her finger.

"Damn it. Paramedics said they found her face down. Her fall probably caused it," Derek said. "The rest of her brain checks out clean; but we need to get in there right away and fix that."

Meredith stood up from her chair and pointed to the exit. "I'll, um...I'll go let the OR know."

"Okay."

Once she was out of his line of vision, Derek heaved out a sigh and let his head fall into his hands. Meredith was right this morning. It wasn't a good day.

...

Usually, standing over and open brain made everything else in the world momentarily disappear. The OR was always a place where Meredith could stay focused, calm, confident in her task. But not today. Today, all she was concentrating on was the C-section happening on the other end of the surgical table, the C-section to remove Claire's sixteen week old baby. It was horrible and unfair and as much as she tried to hold back the tears, they pricked her eyes anyway.

"Suction," Derek requested softly. He knew what she was feeling; he was feeling it, too. So he tried his best to engage her as they operated on the hematoma, anything to keep her from looking to the OB getting ready to cut Claire's belly open.

Meredith snapped back into doctor mode and suctioned the area Derek was working on, careful not to bump the bleeder with the instrument.

"Do you want to open the dura?" he asked, ready to hand the scalpel over.

Normally, she'd jump on the chance, but today, even she knew her surgical capabilities weren't at their best. So she shook her head. "No, I'm...you do it," Meredith said.

Derek pursed his lips beneath his mask and nodded in resignation. "Okay."

Meredith's eyes flicked back and forth between both surgeries, trying to focus on the brain instead of the baby they'd be pulling from Claire's uterus minutes from now. _You can do this, you can do this_, she chanted to herself. She sidled up next to Derek and tried to relax. Even just brushing up against him made her feel better.

"Meredith, you can go," Derek said in a hushed whisper so no one could hear him but her. He knew that no matter how hard she tried not to be affected, it was useless.

"I can do this," she said weakly.

Dr. Jensen, the obstetrician asked the scrub nurse for a scalpel, and Meredith swallowed difficultly. Hot tears stung her eyes. She could feel her heart thudding in her chest. She needed out. Now.

**TBC.**


	80. Today Has Been Okay Pt 2

**Disclaimer: Grey's belongs to Shonda. Not me.**

**This chapter picks up right where the last one left off. Enjoy.**

Meredith's eyes flicked back and forth between both surgeries, trying to focus on the brain instead of the baby they'd be pulling from Claire's uterus minutes from now. _You can do this, you can do this_, she chanted to herself. She sidled up next to Derek and tried to relax. Even just brushing up against him made her feel better.

"Meredith, you can go," Derek said in a hushed whisper so no one could hear him but her. He knew that no matter how hard she tried not to be affected, it was useless.

"I can do this," she said weakly.

Dr. Jensen, the obstetrician, asked the scrub nurse for a scalpel, and Meredith swallowed difficultly. Hot tears stung her eyes. She could feel her heart thudding in her chest. She needed out. Now.

"Meredith." Derek took the suctioner away from her and frowned sadly beneath his mask. "Mer," he repeated.

"I have to...I can't." She shook her head. "Derek, I can't."

"Go," he said, pointing to the OR doors. "Just go. It's okay."

A tear slipped from her eye and was soaked up by her scrub mask. "I..."

"Meredith, please leave," Derek nearly begged. "I don't want you in here for this."

Meredith's stomach churned, and she could sense the vomit rising in her throat. She quickly turned around, clutching her belly as she exited the OR. Her mind was on overdrive as she navigated through the halls toward the bathroom. When she finally reached it, she flung open the nearest stall door and retched into the toilet, barely pulling her mask off in time.

She took in ragged breaths in between throwing up, attempting to get oxygen into her lungs. To feel herself breathing. Minutes passed before she'd expelled everything in her, and she had just enough energy to flush before collapsing against the wall. "I'm sorry. It's okay," she soothed her belly, splaying her hand over her bump. "I won't let that happen to you."

The bathroom door opened and Cristina nearly walked right by her friend before she noticed Meredith hunched in front of the wall, choking on her sobs. "Mer?"

Meredith said nothing, just shook her head, letting the tears drip down onto the knees of her scrub pants. She look up and Cristina and went to speak, but nothing came out. Cristina's eyes grew wide with concern and she knelt down next to her, placing a cautious hand on Meredith's shoulder.

"Mer, what is it?" Cristina asked. "Are you okay?"

"No," Meredith whimpered.

Cristina slumped down on the floor, pulling some toilet paper off the roll and handing it to Meredith so she could wipe her tear stained face. "Mer, talk to me," she said. This wasn't familiar territory for them, the talking thing. But as her person, Cristina knew her friend needed her.

"My patient. Her baby. She was sixteen weeks and then...now the baby is dead and - I couldn't stay. I couldn't watch them..." Her voice trailed off and she sighed heavily. "I just had to leave."

"Okay," Cristina said softly, glancing to Meredith's growing stomach. She, too, cared about the baby inside her friend, just as much as she cared about Meredith. And though she'd only admit it grudgingly, Derek too. "You're okay though, right? And the baby?"

Meredith nodded as she wiped her nose with the wad of toilet paper. "We're fine. But she isn't. She's going to wake up and -" Another round of bile burned her esophagus and she quickly raised herself onto her knees, waiting for the vomiting to overtake her again. But there was nothing left. She coughed a few times then rejoined her friend on the floor.

"She'll be okay," Cristina said in an attempt to calm Meredith down. "Right now, it sucks. But she will be okay."

"Yeah," Meredith sighed, hoping beyond hope it was true, because hope was all she had. She rested her head on Cristina's shoulder and sighed. Right now, her friend was the next best thing to her husband.

"Are you...did you want me to page Derek?" she offered.

Meredith shook her head, softly blowing her nose. "No, he's in surgery. He can't let her die."

"Okay," Cristina agreed. "Well, let's go upstairs then. And I'll, um, bring you some food or something..." She gently tugged on Meredith's arm and they stood back up on their feet. As much as Meredith felt the compulsion to lie down on the floor, she had to admit, Cristina was right. She couldn't stay there all day.

They managed to make it to the elevator and up to the fifth floor to Derek's office, when Meredith remembered she'd left her keys locked inside. "Crap. We're locked out. My keys are on the desk."

"What about his keys?"

"Probably with him." Meredith bit her lip and sighed. She felt her stomach gurgling as the need to eat came over her. "It's okay; I'll just go in the lounge down the hall. You can go back to work; I don't want you getting in trouble," she said.

Cristina shrugged. "Owen's in charge of the pit. He'll understand. Besides, there's not much left down there anyway."

"'Kay," Meredith said softly, placing a comforting hand over her belly as they walked down the hall toward the lounge. She pushed the door open and thanked her lucky stars when she saw that it was empty.

"Holy crap," Cristina said. "It's like Caesar's frigging palace in here..."

"Yeah, well, you know. Fancy attendings need fancy things they never use..." Meredith said sarcastically, sitting down on the leather couch.

Cristina grumbled in agreement as she looked around, taking in all of the perks that came along with being an attending. "Something to look forward to," she said. "Lucky bitches."

Meredith laughed a little at that, the first smile she'd cracked in hours. "I know," she concurred.

"Are you and McBaby hungry? I'll go get food," Cristina offered, grabbing the remote off the table and flipping on the TV mounted on the wall.

"Yeah, I should probably eat something," Meredith said, kicking off her shoes. "Something bland, so I don't see it again in an hour, please."

"Got it."

Meredith lay back on the couch and rested her socked feet on the arm of it. In the back of her mind, she knew if Bailey caught her and Cristina lounging around, she'd probably kill them. But she figured this was safer than practicing medicine today. She needed a time out to let herself unwind.

She pulled her phone from her pocket and texted Derek, letting him know that she was okay. Well, not okay. But better than she'd been a few minutes ago. Meredith knew that he was worried about her, and would come looking for her after Claire's surgery.

_In the attending lounge. Cristina is with me. I'm okay. Love you._

After pushing send, she let out a breath and her hands fell instinctively to her belly. She'd gotten so used to it being there, however small it was still. "I love you," Meredith whispered to the bump. She felt the familiar feeling of the popping bubbles going on inside and smiled. Perhaps the baby's way of saying it back to her. Their lemon-sized baby provided her with a sense of comfort that was unmatched except for Derek.

Cristina came back eventually with a bag full of food, which they ate lazily while they hid out and watched afternoon television. No one had paged them yet, questioning their whereabouts, so they took it as a sign that they were in the clear. Afterward, now more relaxed and no longer hungry, Meredith's exhaustion finally hit and the need to sleep overtook her.

"What're you doing?" Cristina asked, watching as Meredith repositioned herself on the couch so that her head rested on her friend's lap.

Meredith put a pillow between her knees for back support and kept one hand still protectively draped over her abdomen. "Sleeping," she said softly.

"On me?"

"Just for a pillow," Meredith responded.

"You're lucky you're pregnant, or I'd kick your ass," Cristina chided, putting her feet up on the coffee table in front of them so she, too, could recline more comfortably.

Meredith smiled tiredly. "I'm glad I'm pregnant then."

Hours passed before anyone walked in the lounge, and when Cristina heard the clicking of the knob, she turned around quickly, expecting to get a verbal ass kicking for going MIA. So she breathed a sigh of relief when Derek entered the room, a tired smile on his face.

"Hey," he greeted, walking over and dropping down on the coffee table in front of them. When he saw Meredith sleeping on the couch, he was glad for it. "How is she?"

"Better. She was pretty upset when I found her," Cristina said, Meredith's head still resting on her lap.

Derek frowned. "Where'd you find her?"

"Bathroom. She threw up, I think; and then she was crying. But I talked her down," she told Derek. "Then we came up here, ate, and she fell asleep."

"Thank you, Cristina," Derek said sincerely. "That's...I appreciate it."

Cristina nodded in recognition and looked down to her friend. "It's no problem. Better than being stuck in the pit."

"Yeah," Derek concurred. "So, look, would you mind hanging out here for an hour? I need to go check on post-ops and talk to some families about patient statuses."

"Yeah, whatever," Cristina yawned, popping a chip into her mouth. "It's like a resort spa in here anyway. Just don't rat me out for sitting on my ass or I'll blame your pregnant wife."

"Secret's safe," he said. He handed Cristina the keys Meredith had accidentally left locked in his office. "If she wakes up before I get back, can you give her these, in case she needs to go into the office for something? She forgot them earlier."

Cristina took the keys from him and set them on the arm of the couch. "Yeah. Oh, hey, how's that patient?"

Derek ran a hand through his hair and shook his head, his eyes trained on Meredith's belly. "Alive. Devastated, but alive."

"Sucks," Cristina sighed.

"Yeah." He leaned over the couch then pressed a kiss to the top of Meredith's head, careful not to wake her. "Alright, I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Okay," she replied. Cristina turned her head toward the door. "Hey, just so you know, when it comes time for fellowship applications, I expect a glowing recommendation, Shepherd."

"Got it," Derek called out, waving in acknowledgement before exiting the room.

By the time he got back, almost an hour had passed, and Meredith was finally awake, sitting on the couch with Cristina. He smiled when he saw her watching some sitcom with her friend, eating some graham crackers.

"Hey," he said.

Meredith raised her eyes to meet her husband's and mirrored the small smile on his face. "Hey."

"Before this gets awkward, I'm gonna go," Cristina announced as she raised herself up off the couch and slipped her shoes back on.

"Thank you for today," Meredith told her friend meekly, almost seeming embarrassed for her freak out earlier in the day. "I'm glad you were there."

Cristina patted Meredith's shoulder. "Yeah."

"Thanks, Yang," Derek echoed.

Once the two were alone in the lounge, he dropped down on the cushion Cristina had been occupying. "Feeling better?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, running a tired hand over her belly.

"Mer, look..."

"Can we just go home? We can talk, but...home first?" she asked. The day had been draining, and there was nothing more she wanted than leave work.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, let's go."

As the details of the day flooded her brain again, Meredith fought back the tears that she could feel burning in her eyes while she got changed out of her scrubs and back into her clothes. She smoothed her shirt over her bump and inhaled deeply. "We're going home," she whispered to her belly. She was thankful for the growing person inside her, even more so after today.

...

The drive home was nearly silent. Derek wasn't sure what to say. He was still reliving the surgery today over and over again in his mind. Meredith panicking and running out; and him, unable to follow her because of his duty as Claire's surgeon. Then the sinking feeling in his stomach as the stillborn fetus was pulled from Claire's uterus. As a surgeon, he was trained to focus on the medicine. But as a husband, as well as a father to his and Meredith's unborn child, it was impossible to witness something like that and not be affected. The _what ifs_ plagued his mind. _What if it happened to them? How would they move on with life? Could they?_ Irrational, yes. But as a parent-to-be, completely natural.

Meredith stared blankly out the passenger side window, watching the raindrops slide down the glass. December always brought cold, rainy spells to Seattle, and it was appropriate on a day like this one. She sighed quietly and leaned her forehead against the glass; the cold moisture against her skin was refreshing. Her mind was so busy moving in ten different directions that when Derek pulled into their driveway, she did a double take, wondering how they'd gotten from there to here without her even noticing. Kind of like life.

Once inside the house, Meredith kicked her shoes off in the foyer and smiled slightly at Derek. "Do you mind if I go take a shower?"

"Not at all." Derek shook his head and kissed her cheek, then bent down to pet Charlie as he ran in to greet them.

"Okay," Meredith said, scratching Charlie behind the ears before going upstairs.

"What should we have for dinner, buddy?" Derek asked Charlie as he walked into the kitchen.

Charlie just yawned, following Derek, and he laughed. "Very helpful; thanks."

As he went to open the fridge, the ultrasound picture fell off the door and onto the floor. Derek bent down to pick it up and smiled at the 3-d image of their baby, small and completely beautiful, safe inside of Meredith. It was surreal, really, even to think that their child would be born this time next year, that they would have a six month old baby in the house.

Derek wiped the tears from his eyes and let out a breath. It was...thrilling. And it made him grateful for every day leading up to May 29th. "I love you," he whispered, running his finger over the outline of the baby's body.

He placed it back on the fridge, then he heated up some leftover chicken parm and spaghetti and made them each a dish. Cooking something from scratch was just not on the agenda today, not when he and Meredith wanted nothing more than to curl up in bed.

When Meredith eventually entered the kitchen, she smiled at him. Even with damp hair and decked out in his Bowdoin sweatshirt and some gray pajama pants, she was still glowy and beautiful. "Hey," she said.

"Hey," Derek returned, grabbing some napkins. "Food's done. Wanna eat in the living room?"

"Yeah, sure," Meredith shrugged. She took their drink cups, forks, and knives; and Derek followed behind her holding their plates, with Charlie in tow.

They seated themselves on the couch, and Meredith sidled up against him. Just having him close to her helped. "Today sucked," she sighed, twirling some noodles onto her fork.

Derek kissed the top of her head comfortingly. "I know," he said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

In the past, she would have given him her trademark answers: a simple '_no'_ or an annoyed '_I'm fine'_ or a blunt '_don't_.' But now, Meredith was never hesitant. Talking helped, and she knew Derek was there for her, unconditionally.

Meredith sighed. "Just a bad day," she said. "We're trained not to get emotional - to only look at things from a medical perspective. But I put myself in Claire's place. I tried not to, but I did. And I don't know what I would do if that happened to us."

"Mer, we can't think like that," Derek said, setting his plate on his lap and wrapping his arm around Meredith's shoulders. "I know it's only natural, but we have to try not to. It'll drive us crazy if we do that."

"I know," she acknowledged. She looked to Derek with teary eyes and smiled. "But we're parents now."

Chills ran through him when she said that. They were parents, even though the baby was lemon-sized and still living inside Meredith. They would be parents forever. "And that changes everything..." Derek added.

"It does," Meredith said softly, taking his hand and resting it over her belly, and placing her hand on top. "I love our baby so much," she whispered as a few tears slipped down her cheeks. "I'd lay my life on the line for him or her in a split second. And you. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost either one of you. If I were Claire, I would have wished for death, rather than deal with that loss."

Derek hugged her closer and pressed a kiss to her temple. "I know," he whispered. "You two are the most important people in my life. I can't even imagine that. It makes me nauseous just thinking about it."

"Were you there? You know, when they found out?" Meredith asked hesitantly, unsure of whether or not she wanted the answer.

"I was, yeah," Derek admitted. He felt his stomach flip flop as he thought back to it. The surgery, and then the OB telling Claire and her husband what happened afterward. It was the worst part of the job, the part that made him hate being a surgeon sometimes.

Meredith's stomach growled. Crying and chowing down on dinner at the same time wasn't an easy task, but she had to eat for the baby's sake. She took a bite of chicken and chewed. "I guess that's why people think we're crazy for having a baby right now."

"Who thinks we're crazy?" Derek asked.

"I dunno. Cristina still can't believe I let you knock me up. I mean, she's supportive and everything, but I guess she has a point. I'm only a fourth year resident. It doesn't happen that often...not planned, anyway," Meredith said. "If my mother were alive and lucid, I know she'd be...not supportive, to put it nicely."

"I think she'd be proud."

She looked at him strangely. "Why would she be proud?"

"You've done everything she could never do. You proved that you can have both. Family and surgery. And you'd be giving her a grandchild - her first grandchild," Derek smiled. "She's proud of you, Meredith. She's not here, but I know she's proud."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and kissed his neck. He had this way of always saying the right thing. She really loved that. "Yeah?"

"Mmhmm," Derek hummed.

"Even if she wasn't, I wouldn't care," Meredith said. She raised her eyes to meet his and smiled at her husband. "Because I know we can do this, Derek. No matter what anyone says. I know we can."

"I know we can, too," he echoed. "I'm not going to turn into your father. And you're not going to turn into your mother. I don't ever want you to worry about that. I'm in this forever, Meredith." He tilted her chin toward him and pressed his lips against hers gently.

She sighed at the contact and leaned into him. "So am I," Meredith whispered back.

"And this baby will know that. That we'll always be here for each other," Derek said, with an unquestionable confidence.

"Because we're a family," she said, their hands pressed to her belly.

Derek rested his head against hers, breathing in his wife. Lavender, her signature scent since that night at Joe's. And cocoa butter, her additional stretch mark-preventing, pregnancy aura.

Then and now. From a girl and a guy in a bar to a soon-to-be family of three. Thoughts like that gave days like this hope. Hope for their family, and all they would be.

He smiled softly. "We are."


	81. Boy or Girl?

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them! I'm starting to bank updates now, so I should be able to post more often; so sorry for the wait. Anyway, enjoy!**

"Are we going to find out?" Meredith asked, toothbrush in her mouth as they went through their nighttime routine in preparation for bed. "Our appointment is tomorrow and we haven't decided yet."

As Derek pulled the covers down, he grinned. "I already told you, it's up to you."

Meredith spit into the sink in their bathroom. "You're one half of this baby. You get to decide, too..." she pointed out.

"Alright, well, let's make a pros and cons list," Derek decided. He grabbed a magazine from the top of the dresser and flipped to a fairly blank page to write on. "Pro," he prompted, looking up at her, pen in hand.

She smiled as she rubbed some cocoa butter onto her belly, which was definitely prominent now, even with clothes on. "Umm..." Meredith pondered. "Okay. Nursery. If we find out, we can decorate...princess or baseball or...whatever."

"Nursery," Derek said, writing it down. "Hmm...another pro...baby shower. Izzie would appreciate it, since she already commissioned herself as the planner. Today, she was on my service and bought me a coffee. She's not even subtle about it anymore. Just flat out bribing," he chuckled.

Meredith giggled too. "Well, we know what her vote is. Okay, con...we won't be surprised."

"True," he agreed. "And if we're surprised, it might give you more of an incentive to push, because we can't wait to find out." Derek laughed when she smirked at him.

"A baby shooting out of my hoohoo is incentive enough to push," Meredith said, putting the lid back on the cocoa butter and setting it on her nightstand. "But yes, you're right."

The combination of lavender and cocoa filled the air around them as they got settled in bed. He smiled; he would always associate it with her pregnancy. Derek kissed her temple and breathed her in. "There's pros and cons either way; maybe we should just flip a coin," he joked.

Meredith's hand naturally draped over her belly and she smiled down at it. Still tiny, but getting bigger every day. "The books say that finding out helps you bond with the baby more. I mean, we already talk to the baby and we're already in love with it and everything, but maybe it's true. You know, for when we eventually pick a name, we could start calling the baby by it, see if it fits or not."

"Aah, naming. That'll be fun," Derek said amusedly. "I hope we have similar taste in names. I have no idea what you like."

"Something normal," Meredith shrugged. "Not Apple or Flash or Ophelia. Just something we like. And it has to flow with Shepherd."

"Normal is good," he nodded. "I don't want anything eccentric either."

"Good," she said, looking down at her belly. "What's your vote? Should we find out what you are?"

"What do you think it is?" Derek asked.

Meredith bit her lip and looked over at her husband. "I honestly have no idea. Sometimes I swear it's a girl, and other days, I'm convinced it's a boy. What do you think it is?"

"I've been saying girl forever, so I'm sticking with that," he grinned. "But then again, I've never dabbled into the psychic realm, so who knows?" Derek pointed out with a laugh.

She smiled. "Maybe we should find out. It might be kinda nice to know. We can have everything set up before the baby is born and we won't have to go out and buy things afterward, 'cause I'm sure we'll be busy enough. And maybe we could get some things with the name on it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Meredith answered honestly. "What do you think? It's your choice, too."

Derek thought it over for a moment then smiled. "Let's do it."

"Okay then," she said softly, tilting her head up to kiss him. Her lips tingled against his and chills ran through her. When they pulled back, she combed her fingers through his hair. "This time tomorrow, we'll know the sex of our baby," Meredith sighed happily.

"I can't wait."

...

The next morning, they had no sooner walked through the hospital doors when Izzie appeared, bribery food on the ready. "Hey," she greeted them cheerfully. "I made muffins. Blueberry, chocolate chip, and banana nut, just for you two." She handed Meredith the large Tupperware container and smiled. "So..."

"We're finding out," Meredith supplied. "You don't have to suck up anymore. Although, I do like muffins."

Izzie's eyes went wide with excitement. "You are? Oh, I'm so glad! I was really hoping you would."

"We know," Derek said, humored by their friend's mild euphoria at their decision.

Izzie's pager went off and she pulled it from her pocket. "Okay, I want to see ultrasound pictures when you're done. Good luck!" she called out, then headed down the hall.

"Muffins. She really pulled out the big guns for today," Derek teased as he and Meredith waited for the elevator to arrive.

"Of course," Meredith giggled. She pulled a chocolate chip one from the container and bit into it. "Our baby is Izzie's passion."

They stepped into the elevator and he pressed the button for the surgical floor. "Hmm...ours too." Derek leaned in and kissed her while they had a few seconds of privacy after the doors closed. They always tried to sneak in a few kisses before the hustle and bustle of the day began.

When the doors opened, Meredith squeezed his hand. "Okay, I'll go get changed and meet you at the nurses' station," she said.

"Okay."

Derek continued his trek up to the fifth floor to grab some charts from his office, and change into his scrubs in the attending lounge. He opened the lounge door and smiled at Mark, who was making himself a cup of coffee. "Morning," he said.

"Morning," Mark returned. "So today's the day, right? What did you two decide?"

Derek opened his locker and took his scrubs and white coat from the inside. "We're finding out."

"No kidding," Mark grinned.

"Yeah, we decided it was just easier that way. And honestly, it would be hard holding out until May," Derek pointed out. "So what's your vote?"

"On the sex?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah."

Mark thought seriously for a few moments and ran a hand through his hair. "Girl," he said. "No, wait. Definitely a boy. Wait." He sighed. "I don't know. What do you want it to be?"

"Makes no difference to me," Derek answered. "Boy, girl...we'll be thrilled either way. Mer's only fifteen weeks along, so we might not even be able to tell yet. But the doctor said there's a chance we could sneak a peek."

"Kinda hard to miss a thing between the legs," Mark said candidly, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Well, we'll find out today," Derek said. "I have to get changed and meet Mer back downstairs. See you later," he said as he checked his watch and headed into the bathroom.

"Let me know if it has a thing or not!" Mark called out.

"What if it doesn't?" Derek asked, rolling his eyes and laughing.

"Then I'll know I'm having a niece."

Derek just smiled. "Alright then."

He caught up with Meredith minutes later on the fourth floor, an armful of charts in tow. Because Meredith's appointment was only a few hours away, they had to do rounds a little quicker than normal, so they could fit in one surgery before heading up to OB.

"Hey."

She handed her husband a cup of coffee and smiled. "Coffee," Meredith replied, handing it to him, a decaf cup of tea for herself in the other hand. It was bland and weak, but at least she could pretend it was the coffee she so desperately craved.

"Thank you," Derek said, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek.

They walked down the hall toward the pre-op rooms to check on their patients. Days like this made Meredith glad she had chosen neuro; no other attending would understand her level of excitement today. Because her husband-slash-attending felt the same way.

"I saw Mark upstairs. He wants us to tell him if the baby has a thing between its legs or not," Derek said, gulping down his coffee so he could throw the cup away before reaching their first patient stop.

Meredith laughed. "You mean a penis?"

"Yes," Derek chuckled. "I'd hope that if there was something between our baby's legs, it would be a penis."

"Or there might be nothing there, and we could have a girl," Meredith said with a smile, running a hand over her belly, which was starting to look a bit rounder under her scrubs.

"We'll be celebrating either way," he winked at her. They reached their patient's room and Derek knocked twice before entering. "Good morning, Ms. Eisell."

"Hello again, Dr. Shepherd. And I already told you, call me Betty," the older woman returned politely. She turned to Meredith and smiled. "And this must be the other Dr. Shepherd you told me about yesterday."

"Yep. My wife, in the flesh," Derek joked as he flipped open Ms. Eisell's chart and pulled his penlight from his pocket.

Meredith eyed them both curiously, wondering why she was a conversation topic. Derek noticed her confusion and chuckled softly. "Betty was admitted yesterday afternoon, when you got pulled into the emergency surgery with Hunt. I told her that you'd be scrubbing in on her surgery today."

"Oh, well, it's very nice to meet you," Meredith replied kindly.

As Derek examined Ms. Eisell's pupils, the woman glanced over at Meredith's belly and gasped. "Oh, you're pregnant! How exciting!" she all but cheered.

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. "Oh. Yeah. Fifteen weeks along," she informed her.

"Fifteen weeks," Betty echoed. "Well, that's almost halfway. When are you due, dear?"

"End of May," Meredith said, patting her pouchy bump gently. "We're so excited."

Derek scribbled down some notes in the woman's chart before flipping it shut. "We're finding out the sex today," he said. It didn't much matter that he'd only met the woman yesterday; he was ready to shout their news from the rooftops.

"Oh wow," Betty said dramatically, placing a hand over her heart. "You know, I guessed the sex of all of my children correctly. As soon as I found out I was pregnant with each of them, I just knew. My late husband, Walt, he thought I was making it up. He teased me every time. But every time, I was right," the woman boasted playfully.

"Very impressive," Derek played along, putting his pen in his pocket. "Any guesses about our baby?"

Betty reached a hand out to Meredith and smiled. "May I, dear?" she asked, holding a tentative hand over her belly.

"Sure," Meredith said. People touched her belly all the time, and it really didn't faze her as of yet. When there _wasn't_ a hand on her belly, it was strange.

She placed her palm over Meredith's abdomen and pondered in silence for a few moments. "Hmm...usually I know immediately. But your baby is being very secretive..."

Both Meredith and Derek laughed at that. Obviously there was no way anyone could make an accurate guess, but still, it was amusing. "Well, I guess we'll just have to try again later," Derek grinned.

"Okay, then," Betty agreed, laughing.

"So you look good. Your surgery is scheduled in an hour, so we'll be back then. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask," Derek said, holding the chart under his arm.

"Oh, please let me know the sex once you find out. Now I'm intrigued," Betty said hopefully.

Meredith took a subtle sip of her tea then giggled. "We definitely will."

After exiting the room, Derek placed his hand on the small of Meredith's back and grinned. "You're a good sport, Meredith."

"Why?"

"Because. You gracefully suffer through all the belly touching and oohs-and-awws," he said amusedly, stopping at the next room on their rounding list.

Meredith smirked. "Well, you do it a thousand times a day. I'm used to it."

Rounds seemed to drag on forever, as did the short brain shunt procedure they'd performed on Ms. Eisell right afterward. But now, they were headed downstairs to OB for their appointment with Dr. Halloran. Once they were signed in on the appointment chart, they found two empty chairs while they waited to be called back.

"So, Alex and George thinks it's a girl. Cristina and Lexie think it's a boy. And Izzie is still undecided," Meredith said, as she absentmindedly paged through a parenting magazine.

Derek kissed her temple, smiling against her skin. "Are they taking bets on our child?"

"Losers buy lunch," Meredith giggled. "Speaking of which...I hope we get called back soon, because I'm hungry."

"Our next surgery isn't for a while, so we can eat after this," he replied. He took her hand and squeezed it gently. "Nervous?"

She looked over at him and smiled. "No. Just excited."

"Me too," Derek grinned.

"Meredith?" one of the nurses called out politely. "You can come on back."

They rose up from their chairs and followed the nurse back to one of the exam rooms, eager to get the appointment underway. "Dr. Halloran is just finishing up across the hall. She'll be with you in a minute."

"Okay, thanks," Derek said, taking Meredith's hand as she hopped up onto the table.

Meredith swung her legs back and forth in anticipation, and Derek chuckled. "I'm surprised none of our friends asked to tag along for this."

"If they did, I would've said no," she laughed. "I love them and everything, but this is...family time, or whatever."

"Good morning, Meredith, Derek," Dr. Halloran greeted as she entered the room, closing the door behind her. "So...fifteen weeks now. How are you feeling?"

"I feel good," Meredith replied. "No more morning sickness, just occasional nausea if I eat something the baby doesn't like," she giggled. "Good appetite. Cravings. Mood swings. Driving Derek crazy, I'm sure."

"All completely normal," Dr. Halloran said humorously. "I just want to check your weight and blood pressure, then we can get to the ultrasound," she said, putting the blood pressure cuff around Meredith's upper arm. "Baby is definitely growing," she commented.

"Every day," Meredith agreed, grazing her belly lightly with her fingers, as Dr. Halloran pumped up the cuff and read the number on the meter.

"120 over 80, the optimal BP, which is excellent," Dr. Halloran recorded. "Okay, can I have you step onto the scale?"

Meredith hopped up off the table, slipped her shoes off, and stepped onto the scale against the wall. She knew gaining a little bit of weight was just part of pregnancy, so she took the number in stride. "You've gained two pounds in the past three weeks; right on track."

"Good," she said, wedging her feet back into her shoes. Derek helped her back up onto the table, and she didn't let go of his hand, butterflies getting the best of her.

"Onto the ultrasound," the doctor smiled, flipping on the monitor then reclining the table so Meredith could lie back. "As I probably mentioned to you before, fifteen weeks is the first chance to find out the baby's sex. There's no guarantees because it's still early. But we can give it a try. Do you want to know?" she asked. "If not, let me know, so I can turn the monitor around. Being doctors, we can all read ultrasounds, so we have to do this a little differently," Dr. Halloran said amusedly.

Derek looked to Meredith, who nodded. "Yeah, we want to know," he replied, kissing the back of his wife's hand.

"Okay," the doctor nodded in acknowledgement. She squirted some gel onto Meredith's belly and rubbed it around with the wand. "We'll work our way down, from the head down to 'the goods' to build up suspense," Dr. Halloran laughed.

Meredith giggled, squeezing Derek's hand. "Okay."

"Okay, here we go..." she said. An image of their in utero baby flashed up on the screen, which always brought chills to both of them. Seeing their baby was the greatest thrill they'd ever experienced. "Baby's head is right here," she said, tracing it with her fingers. "From head to bottom, the baby is already four inches. Looks to be close to three ounces. About the size of an apple."

"Apple now," Derek grinned proudly, unable to take his eyes off the 3-d image on screen.

Dr. Halloran moved the wand a little and smiled. "Baby's face. Eyelids are still fused shut, but baby can sense light. If we shined a flashlight on your belly, the baby would likely move away from it. Little nose and lips. Baby's tongue is still making taste buds, too," she said. When the baby's tiny fist moved up to its lips and stuck its thumb into its mouth, the doctor smiled. "Oh, look at that! Baby is a thumb sucker."

"Oh my God," Meredith said, her eyes full to the brim with tears. Seeing their baby from the inside was just about the most surreal thing ever. "Derek..." she breathed.

A tear fell from Derek's eye and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. "Mer, look at that," he gasped. "We have a thumb sucker."

"I sucked my thumb," Meredith giggled, smiling appreciatively to her husband when he handed her a tissue. "How cool is that?"

"Very," Derek said in awe, watching as the baby wiggled around on the screen, thumb never leaving its mouth.

"Lungs are beginning to develop, and baby is inhaling and exhaling their amniotic fluid. They're a good size, right where they should be. The bladder started functioning this week, too. So baby can urinate now. Limbs, fingers, and toes are still growing. Heartbeat looks very strong. Want to take a listen?" Dr. Halloran asked.

"Yes," they said in unison. Meredith kissed Derek's hand and gave it another squeeze, something to prove to her that this wasn't just some euphoric dream-like...whatever. All of this was real.

The beautiful _woosh-woosh-woosh _filled the silence of the room, and they both smiled upon hearing it. Their baby's heartbeat, that pumped life into the little person they'd created. "God, I love that sound," Derek chuckled, letting out a breath.

"Me too," Meredith said softly.

"Perfect heartbeat," Dr. Halloran said, timing the beats with her watch. "A hundred fifty beats per minute."

"Good," they replied in tandem; Derek glanced down at Meredith and smiled. They would never grow tired of listening that that sound.

Dr. Halloran moved the wand down a little. "Okay, onto the main event," she said.

Both Meredith and Derek's eyes traveled back to the screen, their hands clasped in anticipation. The doctor zeroed in on the lower body, but all they saw was a tiny baby's bottom. Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "But that's the butt. I..."

Derek shook his head, humored that their little one clearly wanted to give them a hard time. "Baby is being shy, huh?"

"Looks like it," Dr. Halloran agreed. "The legs are curled into a pretzel, and the baby is kind of turned on its side. Can't see between the legs from this view."

"Turn around so we can see," Meredith coaxed their baby, patting a non-gooey part of her belly with her fingers.

"Well, we know that the baby inherited the stubborn gene from you, Mer," Derek chuckled, leaning down and kissing the top of her head.

Meredith laughed, hitting his arm lightly with the back of her hand.

Dr. Halloran moved the wand back and forth, trying to sneak a peek from another angle, but their baby wasn't budging. "This happens a lot during the early stages of pregnancy," she explained, smiling. "Some babies are a little more modest than others. We can try again tomorrow, if you'd like," she offered.

The news disappointed them, but they both knew they couldn't stay in here, hogging the ultrasound equipment, when there were other patients waiting, both theirs and Dr. Halloran's. Meredith nodded. "That's fine."

"Good news is that the baby is definitely working its muscles...looks like a little gymnast to me," Dr. Halloran said lightly, tracing her fingers over the baby's legs.

"Very flexible," Derek agreed, winking down at Meredith, who blushed a little. "_Just like you_," he mouthed when the doctor wasn't looking.

Meredith smirked back at him. Of course he would bring up her bendiness and sexual escapades during their sonogram. "So, uh, when should we come in tomorrow?" she asked.

"I can fit you in first thing. How's eight? That way you can have the whole day to celebrate...you know, as long as the baby decides to cooperate," Dr. Halloran offered.

"Eight sounds great," Derek concurred.

After Dr. Halloran printed them another stack of pictures and another DVD to go along with it, Meredith and Derek finally left the office, disappointed and amused at the same time. "Well, that figures," Meredith giggled, pressing the button for the elevator.

"Baby definitely takes after you..." he teased. "Sucks its thumb, very stubborn, very flexible. All you."

Meredith bumped her hip with his after they stepped onto the elevator, heading back up to the surgical floor. "Well, the baby has your butt."

"Yeah?"

"That's the first thing I saw when I woke up on the couch after our one night stand. That image is forever in my brain," Meredith said sweetly, biting her lip. "Yes, you two definitely match," she joked.

Derek laughed. "Is that a good thing?"

"Well, I find both of them adorable," she said, holding up one of their butt-first ultrasound photos. She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "Baby is a nice mix of both of us."

"I think so, yes," Derek agreed, taking her hand once the elevator arrived on the fourth floor.

As soon as the doors opened, they saw a multitude of familiar faces smiling back at them, waiting for the news. "So..." Izzie prompted, excitedly.

"Baby mooned us," Meredith said, holding up the picture. "No finding out for us today..."

"Seriously?" Mark asked. "All you got was the kid's ass?"

Derek shrugged. "Baby enjoys keeping us all in suspense. We're going back tomorrow morning; hopefully the baby will play along next time."

"But..." Meredith added, flipping through the picture stack. "Our baby sucks its thumb," she smiled, holding a few out to her friends.

"Oh my God, look at that!" Izzie grinned as she examined the picture closely.

George peered over her shoulder and smiled. "That's so cute."

"And moves and breathes and pees," Meredith sighed contentedly, a hand on her belly. "Our baby is awesome."

"Now who buys lunch?" Alex asked. Izzie handed him the ultrasound picture in her hand and he grinned. "Cute kid."

"Couldn't you just do your own ultrasound?" Cristina asked, letting the smallest smile grace her lips when she received the pictures being passed around.

Meredith shrugged. "We could. But we can wait another night. Obviously the baby doesn't want us to know today," she giggled.

"Well, this is very...anti-climactic," Mark sighed teasingly. "Cute baby, but still."

"Why are you all standing here blocking the elevator?" Bailey asked as she approached them. When she noticed Meredith and Derek with their plethora of pictures, her tone softened immediately. "So you had your sonogram. Boy or girl?"

"No idea," Derek answered, wrapping his arm around his wife's waist. "Baby decided to be stubborn and not show us."

Lexie spotted them all, and ran over to them, fumbling with a stack of charts in her arms. "Oh, you're back! So what is it?" she asked excitedly.

"They don't know," the group answered for them in unison.

"What? What do you mean?" Lexie asked.

"McBaby just showed off its butt cheeks to all of us," Cristina clued her in, holding up the picture so Lexie could have a look.

"Very cute butt," Lexie complimented.

Meredith turned her head toward Derek and smiled at him. "Yes it is."

...

Just as their shifts were coming to an end later on that evening, both Meredith and Derek went to go see Ms. Eisell to do a post-op check on her, as well as brief her on their mystery-sex baby. Derek gently knocked and entered, smiling at the woman who sat in bed with her knitting needles in her lap. "Hello, Betty," he greeted.

Betty's eyes lit up when she saw them and she muted her television. "Hello, dears. I'm so glad you're finally here. I've been waiting for an update. So...what is it?"

For what felt like the fiftieth time that day, Derek graciously replied. "The baby was turned on its side a bit, so we still don't know. You were right earlier...the baby is being very secretive," he chuckled.

Meredith pulled a pen from her pocket and began recording some stats in Betty's chart. "We're trying again tomorrow morning, so hopefully then, we'll have an answer for you," she said kindly.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asked, checking the shunt they'd installed in the woman's brain to make sure it was keeping up with fluid output. "Any pain or dizziness? Headaches?"

"No, I feel fine, honey," she responded, holding up her knitting work. "In fact, I've been working on these for you. I should have them done by tomorrow. You can't go wrong with one in pink, one in blue," Betty held up two nearly finished knitted baby caps.

Meredith bit her lip and smiled, trying to hold back her pregnant lady tears. "That's so nice of you. You really didn't have to do that just for us."

"You operated on my brain. It's the least I could do to make it up to you," Betty explained.

"Well, we appreciate it," Derek thanked her.

Meredith glanced at Derek from the other side of Betty's hospital bed and smiled at her husband. _One in pink, one in blue_. It didn't matter that they weren't sure which one their baby would wear. Their baby moved, and peed, and breathed, and sucked its tiny thumb. And that was still pretty damn good.


	82. Finding Out

**Disclaimer: I wish I could say I owned it, but sadly, I don't.**

**This chapter picks up later on that night. ;)**

"I like Adam," Meredith said, as she paged through the baby name book Bridget had gotten for them, her feet propped up on a kitchen chair while Derek pulled all the makings for ice cream sundaes from the fridge and various cabinets.

She had an urgent craving for maraschino cherries the minute they left work, so after heading to the grocery store to buy a jar, the craving escalated into a need for a full-blown ice cream fest. And Derek was graciously gathering all the ingredients.

"Adam…" Derek considered, retrieving the sprinkles from the cabinet. "I like that."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked. She uncapped her highlighter and ran the fluorescent yellow marker across the name. "That's a possibility."

"Maybe the fact that our baby was stubborn is a good thing. Now we can think about boys and girls names, not just one or the other," Derek pointed out.

Meredith sprinkled a few walnuts into her mouth and smiled. "True," she agreed. "Oh, what about Brian?" She paused. "Ha. Get it? Like that TV show?"

"Very clever," he chuckled. "But the name's kind of outdated," Derek said, taking the ice cream from the freezer, a carton of chocolate and a carton of strawberry. Meredith had insisted on having both.

"Yeah, you're right."

"Matthew?" Derek suggested. He got two bowls and two spoons, and slid them across the counter to her, then grabbed the armful of supplies and walked over to the chair beside her.

Cherries, sprinkles, whipped cream, walnuts, gummy bears, caramel, and hot fudge. Derek was convinced that he would gain more weight than she would during this pregnancy. Meredith could easily out-eat him these days, and not gain a pound. The only part of her that was growing was her belly. And of course, her boobs, which he had to admit, he loved.

"I like Matthew," she replied, scooping some chocolate ice cream into her bowl. "Can you mark that, Der?"

She slid the book over and Derek flipped through the pages until he came across the name, then highlighted it. "Matthew Shepherd. Adam Shepherd," he pondered. "I like both of those."

"Me too," Meredith smiled, pouring a generous amount of maraschino cherries overtop her ice cream, and every single one of the toppings she'd already added.

When she covered all of the contents with a generous amount of whipped cream so that it blanketed everything in her bowl, Derek smirked at his wife. "Wow, you weren't kidding."

"About what?" she asked.

"Your ice cream craving. Intense, huh?" he asked with a grin as he made himself a considerably smaller sundae, a heaping spoonful of chocolate and a small scoop of sprinkles.

Meredith licked some caramel sauce off her fingers and nodded. "Yes, very."

Derek scooped a spoonful into his mouth and paged through the book, trying to find another name possibility. "How about Connor?"

"Oh, I like Connor," Meredith said enthusiastically. "Highlight that one, too."

"Okay," Derek said. He searched for more and after a few minutes, he sighed amusedly. "You know, there's a downside to being the last in my family to have kids. All of the names are taken."

Meredith laughed, spooning out a cherry and a gummy bear floating in their fudgy sea in her bowl. "Like what?"

Derek shrugged. "Pretty much every boy's name in this book," he teased. "Kyle, Robert, Timothy, James, Andrew, Justin…the staple names of every baby name book."

"We'll find one," she assured him. "Oh, how about José? He brought us together in the first place," she giggled.

"Cuervo could be his middle name," Derek winked. "That can go on the short list."

"Sounds good." She moved a little closer to him so they could look through the book together, then flipped to the section with the girl names. "Let's look at some of these."

"Okay," Derek agreed. "Ooh, Abigail. I like that."

Meredith smiled, watching as her husband highlighted it. "Abby for short," she said. "That's pretty. We'll keep that in mind." She scanned the page in search of more possibilities and smiled. "You know, I actually _do_ like the name Addison."

Derek glanced over to her with a dry grin on his face, and she just laughed. "I mean, obviously, we never would. But I'm just saying…it's a pretty name. If we didn't know anyone with that name, we'd be highlighting it."

"I'm sure Addison would be flattered," Derek teased. "Naming our baby after my ex-wife…we'd get some kind of Guinness record for that one."

"Probably," Meredith giggled, turning to another letter at random. "Emily?"

"There'll be ten girls named Emily in her class. It's pretty, but way too overused," Derek said.

Meredith tapped her spoon against her lips as she searched for something else. "Yeah, you're right," she granted. "What about…Emmeline?"

"Emmeline," Derek echoed. "Like Emily and Caroline…combined? That's really cute. I've never heard that name before."

She highlighted it happily and smiled. "This is weird."

"What's weird?" he asked, fighting back the brain freeze from the ice cream in his mouth.

"Thinking about baby names," Meredith replied. "Before you came along, I never in a million years thought I'd be pregnant and highlighting from a book of baby names."

Derek squeezed her hand gently and grinned at her, his smile reaching his eyes. "Me either."

She leaned into him and kissed him, soft and slow, letting their lips linger on each other's before sliding her tongue into his mouth. Meredith tasted the chocolate on his tongue and moaned. "Hmm…maybe we should…"

"Hmm?" Derek murmured, threading his fingers through her hair, his mouth still pressed to hers.

Meredith fumbled for the whipped cream on the counter. "Here or upstairs?" she managed to ask, despite the cloudiness her brain was experiencing as her husband kissed her.

"Up to you," he said, snaking his hands under her shirt and trailing his fingertips up and down her spine. When Meredith's hand found its way into his boxers, he gasped for breath. "Here is fine," he groaned in pleasure.

"Thought so," Meredith said breathlessly, shrieking in laughter when Derek scooped her up and carried her over to the kitchen table, the whipped cream still in her other hand.

Pregnancy sex was still as spontaneous and fun as regular sex, and whenever they had whipped cream on hand, they put it to good use.

Both of their ice cream sundaes melted into milkshakes before they got back to eating them.

...

Derek smiled, watching as Meredith slept soundly next to him in their bed, a hand protectively draped over the small bump that was their baby inside her. She was beautiful. "Mer," he whispered.

Meredith shook her head into her pillow. "Sleeping," she replied.

"Today's the day," Derek reminded her gently, brushing some soft wisps of hair off her face then kissing her forehead.

Her eyes opened a little and she smiled up at him. "Hmm, yeah," she said. Meredith rolled onto her back, stretching her sated, sexed out body, gasping a little in surprise when Derek lifted up her shirt and cold air hit her skin. But when his warm lips touched her, she sighed. He kissed her belly every morning since finding out she was pregnant, without fail.

"I love you," Derek told her slightly swollen belly, then lifted up onto his elbow to kiss Meredith. "And I love you."

Meredith smiled against his lips. "We love you, too."

"We should probably get ready soon. Our appointment is at eight. It's already…" Derek glanced over at the clock on his nightstand. "Almost seven."

"Fine," Meredith sighed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "All of that sex last night wore me out."

"You're the one who wanted more after we washed all of the whipped cream off in the shower," Derek chuckled as they both left the comfort of their bed and began making it, fixing their pillows and smoothing out their comforter so it lay smoothly on top.

Meredith bit her lip guiltily. Just because he was right didn't mean she was going to admit it. "Pregnant, remember? Hormone-palooza going on. I can't help it," she giggled.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the sex," he smirked.

"Good," she said, pointing to her belly. "Because once this grows to be the size of a basketball, you're on your own."

"That's what you say now," Derek winked at her.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "You really think I'll be horny when there's a baby about to shoot out of me?"

"I never underestimate you, Mer," he replied, laughing when she tossed a throw pillow at him.

She smirked at her husband. "That's really sweet of you."

...

They made it to the hospital by a quarter to eight and we're up in the OB wing, waiting to be called back minutes later. Because of Derek's magical neurosurgeon powers, he managed to bump their scheduled surgeries back an hour today in case their appointment ran long. Given their baby's apparent stubbornness, they wanted to reserve extra time in case he or she decided to be mysterious again today.

Meredith tapped her fingers against her belly anxiously. Thoughts of _pink or blue, boy or girl_ ran through her mind on a loop. They didn't prefer one over the other; all they wanted was _to know_.

"Meredith? Derek?" Dr. Halloran said, Meredith's chart in her arms as she appeared in the waiting room.

They both stood up from their chairs, and Derek took Meredith's hand. "Hi," he greeted.

Dr. Halloran smiled, leading them back to an exam room, the first appointment of the day. "Long time, no see, huh?" she joked.

"Yeah," Meredith laughed, her heart beating away in her chest as she hopped up onto the exam table for the second time in two days. Dr. Halloran reclined the table and Meredith lay back, lifting up her scrub top. She smiled when she saw the tiny bump underneath; that always soothed her nerves.

"Second time's a charm," Derek said as he kissed the back of her hand.

"Hope so," she replied, her skin prickling with chills when the doctor squirted the gel on her abdomen.

Dr. Halloran spread the gel over Meredith's belly with the wand and zeroed in on her uterus, all three of them watching as it flashed over the screen. "Okay, here's the baby..."

Both of their breaths caught in their throats upon seeing him or her again. The reality of it all was incredible. "Still sucking the thumb," Derek chuckled, pointing over at the screen.

"Can I have a tissue, Der?" Meredith requested. One glimpse at their baby, and she was a sobbing ball of hormones, and she knew that finding out the sex would only spur more tears.

Derek pulled a few from the box sitting on the countertop and smiled at his wife proudly before his eyes traveled back up to the screen. "I could watch this all day with a bowl of popcorn in my lap," he chuckled.

"Exciting, isn't it?" Dr. Halloran said. "Okay, looks like the legs are...open today. Baby is indeed cooperating," she announced happily. "Let's just zoom in a little down here..."

And then they knew.

"Derek, look," Meredith gasped, her eyes never leaving the screen. This had just topped every moment in the entirely of her life. All she felt was genuine joy.

A grin came over Derek's face that reached his eyes and a few tears slipped over his eyelids. "Baby girl!" he cheered, leaning down and kissing his wife.

Meredith's hands splayed over his cheeks and she kissed him with all she had, their tears mingling together on both of their faces. "I love you," she murmured against his lips. The doctor's presence wasn't a blip on their radar right then; they'd made a beautiful baby girl and they were celebrating their moment.

"I love you, too," Derek whispered. "So much."

"Oh, God," Meredith breathed, handing Derek one of the tissues and patting her face with another. "Definitely a girl," she said as she studied the screen again.

Dr. Halloran smiled at the two of them. "Congratulations."

"Thank you," Derek replied, his fingers laced through Meredith's. "All of her...girl parts...they look good then, right?"

"They do," the doctor nodded, pointing to the screen. "Very clear, healthy girl parts."

"Oh my God," Meredith giggled through her tears. "Derek, we're having a daughter."

"She's beautiful," he said, brushing her tears away with his thumbs and kissing her again.

Meredith smiled. "She really is."

...

They weren't sure how their feet were functioning as they walked through the hall toward their friends, who were all waiting by the nurses' station for the big announcement. Somehow it felt like gravity should have excluded them from its grasp as both of their hearts and minds were on complete overdrive with happiness. Their baby was a girl. A perfect, blessed, beautiful girl that they'd made together. No longer their gender-mysterious blueberry. Their girl.

Meredith felt the tears spring to her eyes again as she saw her friends' faces, their eyes wide in anticipation. She never thought she'd have people in her life that cared so much about her and Derek, and now their baby. It was incredibly sweet, and not a second went by that they didn't appreciate it.

Izzie clasped her hands together in excitement when Meredith held up the ultrasound from halfway down the hall. "What is it?" she called out.

"It's a girl!" Meredith replied, the thrill in her voice carrying through the hallway.

"I knew it!" Mark said, clapping his hands as the rest of the group expressed their congratulations. This baby had turned into the talk of Seattle Grace, at least among their circle of friends, and if Meredith and Derek had to guess, their daughter would always be wrapped around not only their fingers, but their friends' as well.

"Let's see," Alex requested, holding out his hands as he waited for the ultrasound pictures.

Meredith handed off the stack to him and Derek kissed her temple. "Pretty good, huh?" he said into her ear.

"Yeah," Meredith breathed, leaning into him, a hand over her belly.

"Oh my God, look at that," Lexie said in awe. "Guys, she's beautiful."

"Thank you," Derek grinned, full of pride. His daughter, no bigger than an apple, had become his little girl, unquestionably and forever.

Cristina studied the ultrasound photo and smiled. It took a lot for Cristina Yang to show emotion, but this was one of those times where happiness for her person broke through on her face. "She cooperated today, huh?"

"Yes she did," Meredith agreed. "Knees apart, ready to show us that she was a she."

"We're not encouraging that, by the way. In the future, you know, when she's eighteen, knees closed. Always closed," Derek said seriously, but unable to hide his smile.

Meredith smirked at her husband, already overprotective. "Yes, always closed," she echoed.

"Now Iz can plan the baby shower," George joked, earning him a gentle nudge in the arm from Izzie.

"I'm already planning it. Now I know the color scheme," Izzie said. "When you choose a name, let me know so I can have stuff printed up."

Derek chuckled amusedly. "Mer barely has a belly yet," he pointed out.

"She's got the boobs though," Mark chimed in.

"You're engaged. Why are you even looking at my boobs?" Meredith giggled. Leave it to Mark to draw attention to her...growing assets in front of a group of people.

Mark shrugged, taking a sip of coffee. "How can I _not_ notice them?" he asked rhetorically.

"Are you guys working today?" Lexie asked, quick to change the subject.

"Yeah," Derek answered, as all of their ultrasound pictures were collected and handed to Meredith.

Alex couldn't help but laugh. "Good luck with that."

Getting through their shifts that day was a challenge, to put it lightly. All they wanted to do was shout the news of their daughter from the hospital rooftop. Normally, they tried to maintain some level of privacy, separating their personal lives from their work lives. But this was something that was hard to keep tight-lipped about. Derek told Richard when he passed him in the hall on the way to surgery; and Meredith shared their news with Bailey in the scrub room. Parental pride was in full swing, and the off-switch wasn't anywhere to be found. And apparently, it came with an endorphin rush, one that gave them the energy they needed to work efficiently and quickly, their subconscious attempt to leave work and celebrate as soon as they could.

"Hey," Derek said, walking into the resident lounge after their shifts ended, just as Meredith was pulling her bag and coat from her cubby.

Meredith turned around and smiled at him. "Hey," she said, her pregnant belly prominent beneath her long sleeved red shirt, which was getting a little snug in the midsection, like the rest of her clothing. "Ready to go see Betty?" she asked, referring to their patient from yesterday.

Derek nodded, extending his hand as she walked over and took hold if it. "Yeah," he replied. "I'm sure she can't wait to find out," he chuckled.

She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "Baby girl, Derek," Meredith said, still a little breathless at saying that out loud. With every new discovery, the reality became a little clearer. A little better.

"Baby girl," Derek echoed, grinning from ear to ear. Even saying it out loud was awesome.

When they reached Ms. Eisell's room, Meredith gently knocked then entered, Derek following in right behind her. "Betty?" she greeted softly, so as not to startle the woman.

"Oh, come in," Betty said, muting her TV and waving them forward. "I've been waiting to see you all day."

Meredith saw the pink blanket folded neatly on Betty's nightstand and bit her lip in curiosity. Betty saw her looking at it and laughed. "Oh, yes, this is for you," she said.

"What?" Derek asked. "I...wait, how did you know?"

"This morning when I woke up, I just knew," Betty said simply. "So I told my son to pick me up some pink yarn on his way to visit me. And I spent the day knitting this for you. You both have been so good to me; I wanted to show my thanks."

The two of them stood there, stunned and appreciative at the same time. Meredith took it when Betty handed it to her and placed her hand over her belly. "You knew it was going to be a girl?"

"I told you I had instincts about these things, didn't I?" Betty teased.

"Yes, you did," Derek chuckled. He wrapped an arm around Meredith's waist and smiled. "We'll be sure to tell her where it came from."

"She's going to be a beautiful child," Betty complimented. "Congratulations, dears."

"Thank you," Meredith said softly, holding the fuzzy, pink blanket close to her chest. A blanket that would one day belong to their little daughter inside her.

...

They sat curled on the couch after dinner, a large throw blanket draped over them as the fireplace crackled behind them. Derek was sidled up next to Meredith on his left and Charlie on his right. It was a cozy December night, and the perfect end to an already kind of perfect day.

"I love her so much, Derek," Meredith said in awe as she admired their ultrasound photos, which they hadn't been able to put down all day.

"Me too," Derek whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to her temple.

She wiped away a tear that fell down her cheek. "We made a baby girl. It's...I can't even wrap my mind around that. We _made_ her."

"I bet she'll look just like you," he said. "She's already beautiful." Derek traced his finger over the baby's face and smiled.

"I think she'll look like both of us," Meredith replied, mirroring the smile on his face. "She'll definitely come out with a head-full of your hair."

Derek chuckled softly. "Hmm...you think so?"

"I hope she does. I was born bald...only blonde peach fuzz. And I'm pretty sure the Shepherd hair is the dominant gene," Meredith giggled.

"I think she'll be the perfect mix of both of us," Derek grinned.

"So you were right all along, huh?" Meredith said, running her fingers lightly over her belly. "Baby girl."

Derek laughed. "I would've been happy with a boy or girl," he answered honestly. "But I'm so thrilled that we're having a daughter. As soon as we saw her...girl parts, it's like...I don't know. My whole life just shifted. I'm gonna be a dad to a baby girl. That we made. Forever."

"Changes a person," Meredith said as she wiped away a tear that was ready to spill down his cheek. She knew that joy. That rush. She felt it, too.

"Really does," Derek agreed, resting his head against hers.

"Now it'll be even...two guys, two girls," she pointed out, scratching under Charlie's chin. "Hear that buddy? You're having a sister."

"Hmm..." he hummed, the ever-present smile still etched on his face. "Lots of pink and dress-up clothes and dolls."

"And weaseling us into letting her stay out late and use the car when she's eighteen," Meredith added playfully.

Derek sighed, amused. "Well, if she's anything like you, it won't take much to win me over."

"True," she agreed, biting her lip. "But we still have a while before she's an adorably manipulative teenager. First is sleeping through the night and dirty diapers and spit-up."

"Can't wait," Derek said, his heart thudding a little faster as he thought about it. In a few months' time, they'd be parents to a newborn baby girl, and it was...thrilling. He studied the ultrasound photo closely. "God, to think that fifteen weeks ago, she didn't even exist. And now, she's..."

"Our whole world?" she offered, smiling at him.

Derek leaned down and kissed Meredith's belly. "Yeah," he whispered breathlessly. "Our whole world."


	83. Christmas Shopping

**Disclaimer: I only wish I owned it. But the truth is, I don't.**

It was only a few days before Christmas. The house was festive, the stockings were hung, and the tree was decorated. Nothing over the top; just something low-key and relaxed that they could appreciate. And Meredith was honing in on seventeen weeks pregnant, almost halfway there. Her belly was beautifully popped and tiny, and their daughter was growing more every day.

These were the thoughts going through Derek's mind as he woke up later than usual on a weekday, thanks to the few days off they got around the holiday season. He smiled sleepily and reached over to Meredith's side of the bed, expecting to be met with her warm body under the covers. Instead, he was met with empty sheets.

He ran a hand through his hair and glanced over at the clock. 9:57. That was late for _him_, so it was unusual that his wife would be up before he was, especially given her pregnancy. Housing their daughter meant she needed extra sleep, and she took advantage of it as often as she could.

Derek rolled out of bed and walked toward the stairs. He smiled when he heard Meredith downstairs in the kitchen, happily doing whatever it was she was doing. She was fascinating, really. The hardcore nesting phase hadn't kicked in yet, but there were traces of it every now and again. Flipping through magazines to find nursery ideas, coming home from work with a new shower curtain and matching toilet seat, even arranging their DVDs alphabetically. She was adorable.

"Hey," Derek said upon entering their kitchen.

Meredith spun around to face her husband and smiled. "Hey. Hungry? I'm cooking."

"You're cooking?" Derek reiterated. "Since when do you cook?" he asked amusedly, sitting down on one of the stools at the counter.

"I woke up and I really wanted cereal, which is weird because I never crave cereal. So I came downstairs, noticed the pancake mix sitting next to the Lucky Charms on the shelf, and decided to make those instead. I'm putting chocolate chips and bananas in them. Want some?" Meredith asked, reaching for a bowl.

Derek eyed his wife curiously. "Sure, sounds good."

"So do you still want to go shopping today?" Meredith asked as she poured the powder mix into the bowl.

"Yeah," Derek nodded, hopping off the stool to get the eggs from the fridge for her. "Christmas is four days away. We should probably get some shopping done soon," he chuckled.

"I want to get her a stocking," Meredith said, patting her belly gently. "I mean, technically, we could wait until next year, but I want her to have one. She's our daughter, even though she'll still be living inside me for the next few months."

"Our daughter definitely needs a stocking," Derek agreed, his stubble tickling Meredith's cheek when he kissed her.

"We can get her name embroidered on it later. You know, once we pick one," Meredith giggled.

Derek grabbed a banana from the bunch sitting on the counter so he could chop it up for the pancakes. "We have five months. We'll think of something."

"Last night, I was thinking about the name Chelsea. But then I remembered I had a roommate in college named Chelsea, and she was kind of a slut," Meredith sighed. "So…not Chelsea."

"No, not Chelsea," Derek echoed, laughing. "Where's the book?"

Meredith narrowed her eyes and thought for a moment. "Uh…oh, on the side table in the living room."

"Okay."

Derek left the kitchen and entered again seconds later, their baby name book and a highlighter from the drawer in hand. "I guess we can save our boy name list for the next one," he said, flashing her a grin.

She rolled her eyes playfully. "Baby number one has to exit before we can even start thinking about baby number two," she said, dumping a small handful of chocolate chips into the batter.

"Okay, so far we have…Abigail and Emmeline highlighted. I think that's it," he said.

"Pick a letter," Meredith suggested. "We can start there."

Derek opened to a random page in the book and smiled. "L."

"L could work with Shepherd," she nodded. "Anything good?"

"Hmm…Lacey?"

Meredith shook her head. "Nah."

"Okay, what about…Leah?" Derek said, looking up at her, watching as she attempted to pour small pancake circles of batter into the frying pan.

"I really like Leah," Meredith agreed. "That's definitely a contender."

Derek glided the orange highlighter across the name and smiled. "We'll keep that in mind," he said. "Lucy?"

Meredith looked up from the stove and bit her lip contemplatively. "I love that, too."

"L is a good letter," Derek laughed, highlighting Lucy too. "What about Lyla?"

"Lyla," Meredith said slowly, letting it roll over her tongue. "Lyla Shepherd. Leah Shepherd. Lucy Shepherd. I love all of those."

"Shame we're not having triplets," Derek joked, popping one of the banana slivers into his mouth.

"You'd really want triplet daughters?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at her husband. "That'd be a whole lot of estrogen…"

"True, but…it would be fun. Can't deny that," he pointed out humorously. "Although, I'd never win an argument ever again."

Meredith smirked, a hand gracing her belly. "Don't worry. Even with just the two of us, you won't."

"I know," Derek concurred as he set two plates on the table for them. He smiled happily. "And I'm fine with that."

...

"Derek!" Meredith called out from their bedroom just as he was stepping out of the shower.

He slid open the glass door and grabbed his towel off the rack. "Everything okay?"

"I need help. My damn jeans won't button—or zip!" she replied in a huff.

Derek bit back a laugh. For a few weeks now, he'd been watching as her clothes got more and more snug. Her shirts still fit over the belly, but pants—especially tighter ones—weren't fitting so well anymore. And Meredith was determined to stay out of the maternity stores as long as she possibly could.

"Okay, give me a second," he called back. He quickly dried off, wrapped the towel around his waist, and exited their bathroom. Derek resisted the smirk that came over his face when he saw Meredith, lying on the bed, arms outstretched in defeat.

Again…adorable.

"Meredith," Derek sighed in amusement, leaning over the bed and pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"I can do it. I just need your help," she said.

Derek pulled on a pair of boxers from his drawer, flung his towel into the hamper, and walked over to her, who was still staring up at the ceiling. "Mer," he chuckled. "I think—"

"Don't even say it," Meredith warned, pointing her finger at him. "They'll fit."

"Fine," Derek conceded. He reached for her hands and helped her into a sitting position. "Okay, let's see…" Derek found the zipper of her jeans with one hand, and with the other, he pulled the material together so the zipper would go up easier. Or try to, anyway. He could tell just by looking that all the manpower in the world wouldn't get her jeans zipped and buttoned.

Meredith sucked in a breath and held her shirt away from her belly so the material wouldn't snag. "Pull, Derek."

"Trying," Derek said, his thumb throbbing from the zipper digging into his skin. After a few unsuccessful attempts, he heaved a sigh, and braced himself for what he was going to say next. "Mer, they won't zip. I tried."

"But Der, I need to wear pants," Meredith protested, a last ditch effort to get him to try again, though she knew it was a lost cause.

"You have other pants," Derek pointed out encouragingly, walking over to her closet. "What about these gray ones? They'll show off your curves."

"My curves?" she echoed playfully. "You mean my bump and my fat ass?"

Derek tried again. "Meredith, you're pregnant. Your body is changing. Honestly, I wouldn't even know you were pregnant unless I saw your belly. You're still as petite as you always were."

She stared at him, an incredulous look written on her face. "Are you just saying that because you have to?"

"No," he replied.

"I'm only going to get bigger, you know," Meredith warned him, arms crossed over her belly.

Derek smiled as he leaned in to kiss her. "I know…and you'll be beautiful then, too. And when you're…in labor. And when…both of us are up…in the middle of the night…with a crying baby. You always will be," he said between kisses.

Meredith wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him close to her. "I love you," she whispered into his neck.

"I love you, too," he said softly, kissing the top of her head.

When they eventually pulled back, Meredith reluctantly took her black track pants from hanger in her closet and dropped them onto the bed. "No more jeans for a while," she sighed, shimmying them off her legs.

"They sell maternity jeans, Mer," Derek offered helpfully. "We're going shopping today. You could buy some new things—maybe just some pants."

"Hmm…" Meredith groaned reluctantly, hopping into her pants. "Fine. I guess I don't have a choice."

"They sell sexy maternity clothes," Derek said, regretfully taking a pair of his own jeans from his closet. Somehow he felt guilty that his jeans still fit, but hers didn't.

Meredith eyed him up in the mirror as she brushed her hair. "Liar," she smirked.

"They really do," Derek insisted, laughing. "You'll see."

"I might need a Cinnabon from the food court after this ordeal…" she told him.

"What is it with you and Cinnabon?" Derek asked, humored.

Ever since getting pregnant, Meredith insisted on having Cinnabon at least twice a week. Apparently, pastries drizzled in glaze were as necessary as breathing.

Meredith giggled, running some chapstick over her lips. "Because it's the greatest food chain ever invented. Well, next to Taco Bell. I can't choose. Speaking of which, I'll probably be requiring Taco Bell today, too."

Derek pulled a long sleeved shirt over his head and smiled. His wife was the most adorable pregnant woman he'd ever known. "Okay."

...

They'd been in the maternity store for twenty minutes, and Meredith was hesitant to pull anything off the rack. The clothes were actually stylish and sexy, but still, she wanted nothing to do with it.

"Mer, come on," Derek chuckled. "There has to be something in here you like."

Meredith looked at him in disbelief. "Okay, name one thing in this store you think I'd consider wearing," she challenged him.

"Alright, uh…here. How about these?" he asked, holding up a pair of khaki shorts.

"It's December, Derek. By the time I can wear khaki shorts, it'll be late April when I'm eight months pregnant," she reminded him.

"Yeah, you're right," he sighed, moving on to the next rack. "Okay, here we go. Skinny jeans. And they don't even have an elastic band. They're just stretchy. They grow with you," Derek said with as much enthusiasm as he could muster, hoping his attempt would pay off. Because really, if she said no to these, he had no Plan B.

Meredith considered for a moment then shrugged in agreement. "These could work."

"Really?" Derek asked, holding back his joy.

"Yeah." She searched for her size, pulled a pair from the rack, and smiled. "Let's go."

"You want me to go back to the dressing room with you?"

She took his hand and they walked toward the back of the store to the dressing room section. "Well, you wouldn't be my first choice, but since Cristina and Izzie aren't here, you need to be a girl for me."

"Okay," Derek laughed, dropping down onto the bench outside one of the changing rooms. "Nice to know where I stand on the totem pole."

"Just for clothes shopping. Everything else, you're at the top. Don't worry." Meredith smiled and kissed his cheek, then went into the dressing room.

While Derek waited, he silently wished that these jeans were a winner. Meredith was only three and a half months pregnant, and he knew there would be more trips to this store before the baby was born. That's why today had to go well.

She emerged a minute or so later, an unsure smile on her face. "So…"

"Mer, these look great on you," Derek replied with honest enthusiasm.

"Yeah?" Meredith asked. "Are you just saying that?"

"No. Mer, you look hot," he chuckled. "Seriously, you do."

"You can't tell they're maternity jeans?"

Derek looked his wife up and down, unable to keep his eyes off of her. "No, I can't. They look just like your other jeans," he said. "Are they comfy?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want them?" he asked, waiting with baited breath for her answer.

Meredith studied herself in the mirror, chewing on her lower lip as she tugged at the waistband. "Yes."

"Alright then. Success," Derek grinned. "Wanna keep looking? Maybe you'll find other things you like, too."

"Yeah, we can," she replied nonchalantly, though Derek knew she was excited that she'd found something she liked. "I think I saw some cargo pants I want to try on…"

_Victory._

Maybe getting her to come back to the maternity store wouldn't be so hard.

By the time they'd walked out of the maternity store, Meredith had purchased two pairs of jeans, a pair of cargo pants, and a stretchy pair of lounge pants. She looked great in all of it, and Derek could tell she felt good wearing them.

At the Victoria's Secret next door, there was more retail therapy. More lounge pants, two zip-up jackets, some shirts and tank tops, and new panties and bras. Meredith rarely let herself splurge, so this was way overdue. And now, Derek could wrap it all up and give it to her for Christmas. Win win.

Of course, Derek got new things, too. New clothes, and other little odds and ends he wanted. That's why Meredith insisted that he help her pick out his gifts—he was unquestionably the hardest person on the planet to shop for.

And now, they were headed for the Christmas store to pick out a stocking for their daughter, the highlight of the shopping trip. This time last year, any baby talk was hypothetical, just a "when we do." But now, they had a daughter on the way. And next Christmas, she'd be here.

They walked into the store, decorated in reds and greens and smelling of cinnamon and pinecones. Meredith spotted the stockings lining the wall. "Over there," she said.

Once they reached the display, Derek looked over at her. "Red?"

"Hmm…" Meredith ran her fingers over a red stocking when a rack of pink ones caught her eye. "Oh, they have pink ones, Der," she said excitedly. "Look, there's a little snowman on it, too."

Derek pulled it from the shelf and grinned. "This is adorable."

"There's room at the top, too. So we can get her name embroidered on it," she pointed out. "We should get this one."

"Definitely," Derek said in agreement. "I love it."

"Our first baby item," Meredith smiled, tracing over the snowman on their daughter's stocking with her finger.

Derek laughed. "First of millions, I'm sure."

"Of course," she giggled, one hand holding the stocking and the other on her small bump. "I want her to have everything…all the stuff I never had."

"She will," Derek whispered, pressing a kiss to her temple as Meredith leaned into him.

They came across an aisle full of ornaments and stopped to browse. When Derek saw one that doubled as a picture frame, he pulled it from the tree it was hanging on. "We can put one of her ultrasound pictures in it," Derek said proudly, already the doting dad.

A smile came over Meredith's face that reached her eyes and she bit her lip. "We have to get it."

"And next year, we can get a 'Baby's First Christmas' ball," Derek said with a grin. "It can be our thing."

"Our thing?" she echoed.

"Yeah. Ornaments for the Christmas tree. Stuff she makes at school, and ornaments we buy in Disney World or whatever," he shrugged as they continued down the aisle.

Meredith smiled at her husband. Futures filled with school art projects and family vacations. Things she never thought she'd have—or even want—and now, it was real. "Yeah," she said softly. "I'd like that."

"Oh look, they have gates that wrap around the Christmas tree," Derek chuckled, gesturing over to the display. "We'll need one of those one day. Not next year, but definitely the year after."

"She'll only be six months old next Christmas. But when she starts toddling around, we're baby-proofing everything," Meredith said, pulling a granola bar from her bag.

"Hungry?"

Meredith peeled back the wrapper and bit into it. "Getting hungry. This is just my warm-up."

"Okay," Derek said, resisting the need to laugh. She always packed travel food with her these days; just another thing he loved about pregnant her. "Wanna go pay for this? Then we can go get Taco Bell and Cinnabon."

"Are you mocking me?" she asked with a mouthful of chocolate chip granola.

"No." He shook his head, pulling his wallet from his back pocket as they walked toward the check-out line with their pink stocking and frame ornament.

Meredith smiled. "Okay, then."

She bit into her chocolate chunk cinnamon bun from the food court and moaned. First tacos and nachos, now this for dessert. It didn't get much better. "Oh my God, this is better than sex," she sighed contentedly. "Okay, well, not really—but damn close."

"I'm glad you changed your mind on that," he chuckled. "Otherwise, I would've been very offended."

"Really though, we need to get a recipe for these. This is amazing," Meredith said. "Seriously, have a bite."

Derek took a small bite of the cinnamon bun and nodded. "It's good."

"That's an understatement," she corrected, wiping some glaze off her fingers with a napkin. "Can we stop at Toys 'R' Us? I want to get something for Laura."

"Sure," Derek replied.

They saw the store approaching on the left and walked inside then they reached the front doors. "Wow," Derek said. "There's a lot of stuff in here."

"Lexie said anything with Dora the Explorer on it will do. Apparently, that's Laura's new thing," Meredith smiled, discreetly taking another bite of her cinnamon bun, pretending to be oblivious to the No Food or Drink sign posted on the front door.

"Well, let's head for the pink section," he said, lacing his fingers through hers. "We may as well get used to it…all the pink and sparkles."

Meredith laughed as she took in all of the pink cuteness. "This is what our house will look like when there's a little girl in it."

"I'm sure it will. And I can't wait," Derek agreed, kissing her temple.

"Here's some Dora stuff. We can get her something off this wall," she said, surveying the endless toys and clothes with the little cartoon girl's image on it.

"What do three year old girls like?" he asked, picking up a plush doll and flipping over the box.

"I don't know. You're the one that grew up in a house full of girls," she pointed out.

"Yes, but you _are_ a girl," Derek said.

Meredith smirked at him. "Yes, I am. Thanks for noticing."

"Hmm…" Derek grinned, a naughty glint in his eyes. "I notice. Remember last night? I noticed twice."

"Derek," Meredith gasped. "We're in a toy store. No porny talk."

"Just saying," he said in defense of himself. "Okay, three year old girls. Anything with pink or purple." Derek pulled a toy from the shelf and showed her. "Here, what about this?"

"That's a backpack."

"Yes, it's Backpack," Derek nodded.

Meredith eyed him curiously. "What does that have to do with Dora the Explorer?"

"It's Backpack," he repeated. When she continued to look at him blankly, he elaborated. "You know, Dora's friend, Backpack. Then there's the Map and Boots and Swiper…"

"Wow. Very impressive," she said proudly.

"Nine nieces, remember. Well, ten, counting Laura. I know way too much about Nick Jr.," he sighed amusedly. "Don't worry; you'll know all of this stuff soon enough."

"Yay," Meredith said jokingly, though really, the thought of watching cartoons with their daughter did warm, gooey things to her insides. She was already a mom, through and through. "Okay, so…Backpack?"

"He's popular. She probably already has it," Derek said. "We can keep looking."

"Ooh, Dora's Princess Adventure Playset. It comes with blocks and those…people you mentioned," Meredith said with a smile. "Can you grab that from the shelf?"

"Yeah." Derek pulled the plastic purple box from the shelf above their heads and held it in his arms so they could examine it. "Looks good. If I was a three year old girl, I'd love it," he chuckled playfully.

"Okay, good. We can get this. I think she'll enjoy it," Meredith said. She bit her lip in admiration when she came across a rack of toddler-sized nightgowns. "Der, look…tiny clothes," she squeaked. "Look how cute they are. We need to get her one of these." Meredith pulled a pink, 3T Dora nightgown from the rack and folded it over her arm.

Derek smiled at his wife. "Wait until you see the newborn clothes. Socks as long as my thumb. Way tinier than this."

"We're probably going to lose a lot of her little socks then," Meredith teased, one hand over her small belly. "Do they have baby stuff in here? Just to browse a little?"

"Yeah, in the back of the store there's a baby section," Derek replied, setting the playset down on the shelf. "We can come back to this once we're done so I don't have to lug it around. It's kinda heavy."

"Okay." Meredith took his hand and they walked toward the back of the store. When the bright, flashy colors slowly turned into the soft pastels of the baby area, she squeezed his hand a little. "Wow."

"What?"

Meredith shrugged. "Nothing, it's just…exciting. That's all."

Derek leaned in and kissed her, pumping his lips against hers. "Hmm…it is."

They walked down an aisle full of baby swings and she stopped to survey them, tapping her fingers against her belly. "Should we buy gender neutral stuff? I mean, I know we're having a girl. But what if we have a boy next? Do we make him use the pink baby swing?" Meredith asked humorously.

"We can get two different ones; no big deal," he said simply. "We can just save it for when we have a girl again."

Meredith let out a dry laugh. "I'm not a baby factory. Two kids, Der."

"You say that now," he winked.

"I love this pink and purple flowery one," Meredith said, reading the description on the tag of the baby swing. "Plays ten songs, has five nature sounds, six swing speeds, and four reclining positions. Jeez, do they make couches like this? Look how cushiony it is. I want one," she joked.

"Me too," he chuckled. "Look, it swings from side to side instead of back and forth. I like that. Looks really sturdy and safe, too."

"There's even a matching pack and play, stroller and baby carrier," Meredith read from the tag, nearly gasping in excitement. "Is it bad that I want to buy this right now?"

"If you want to, we can," Derek said.

Meredith rocked back and forth on her heels, biting her lip in contemplation for a few moments. "No, we can wait. I'm sure they'll still have it—or something similar to it—in a few months. I want to have the nursery painted and everything before we buy any furniture."

"Okay, that's fine."

"That's another thing…yellow nursery or pink?" she pondered aloud.

"Pink, definitely," Derek grinned. "No reason to do a neutral theme when we know we're having a girl. I'll just paint it again if the next one is a boy, that's all."

"It would be so much easier just to have two girls," Meredith giggled, walking toward a rack of little baby booties.

Derek picked up a pink pair, smiling at how soft they felt in his hands. "I hope so—I mean, I'd love a boy. But having two daughters—think about how close they'd be. Always having her sister there; they'd be best friends."

Meredith smiled at the thought and rubbed her hand over Derek's back. "I'd love that, too," she whispered, kissing his cheek.

"Let's get these," Derek said of the pink booties. "They're cute."

"Yeah," Meredith said.

Derek splayed his hand over her belly. "We're already spoiling you," he told his in-utero daughter.

"People are going to think we're crazy, taking to my belly in the baby booty aisle."

"Let them think that," Derek replied. He kissed her forehead lightly and chuckled against her skin. "She'll be calling us embarrassing parents when she's a teenager. May as well get used to it."

"You'll be the embarrassing one; not me," Meredith said cheekily.

"And why is that?"

"Because," she shrugged. "You're the dorky brain surgeon that knows all about Nick Jr."

"You're also a dorky brain surgeon that's going to learn all about Nick Jr. after she's born," Derek pointed out, handing her the pink booties.

Meredith smirked at her husband. "Shut up."

...

**For those interested, I posted a new one shot, "Grilled Cheese With a Side of Bribery," too. You can find it in my story list! :)**


	84. Christmastime is Here

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

Meredith smiled sleepily as her eyes got used to the sunlight pouring in through the closed curtains of their bedroom. It was nice, waking up to sunshine rather than a blaring alarm clock at six in the morning. She rolled onto her other side, and upon seeing Derek's reindeer boxers, a gift from their nieces, was quickly reminded of today. Christmas.

She slowly sat up and scooted toward the edge of the bed, one hand on her belly as she got up and walked into the bathroom. The bigger the baby grew inside her, the more she had to pee. But she didn't mind. Peeing a hundred times a day was a small price to pay for the daughter they'd have in a few months.

By the time she walked back into their bedroom, Derek was just waking up, rubbing his hands over his eyes. When he saw her, he smiled. "Merry Christmas."

Meredith crawled back into bed next to him and kissed his cheek. "Merry Christmas."

"How long have you been up?"

"Just a few minutes. I had to pee. Again," she giggled.

Derek leaned over and kissed her before pulling up her shirt. "Baby is growing," he said proudly. He pressed a few kisses to her belly and she felt the tickle of his stubble against her skin.

"Merry Christmas, baby girl," Derek whispered to their daughter in her belly.

Meredith placed a hand over her bump and patted it gently. "Merry Christmas, sweetie," she smiled.

"It'll be a lot more fun for you next year, I promise," Derek chuckled. "We'll have a living room full of toys for you to play with."

"Hmm…she'll be six months old," Meredith said softly, trailing her fingers along her belly. "Can you believe we'll have a baby here next Christmas?" she asked with a giggle.

"Crazy, isn't it?" Derek agreed. "I can't wait."

Meredith sighed happily. "Me either."

He glanced over at the clock on his nightstand. "It's almost ten. What time does Izzie want us over for lunch?"

"One," she replied. "Which means we can be back here by three or four, and have the rest of the day to ourselves."

"Who convinced her to do lunch instead of dinner?" Derek asked as Charlie got up, stretched, walked toward them on the bed.

Meredith patted her thighs and their dog immediately curled into her lap. "Well, Cristina opted to work tonight—you know how much she loves holiday injuries. And I think Arizona is working overnight tonight, too, so Izzie decided it would be better if we could all just do something small in the afternoon," she explained, laughing when Charlie rested his face on her belly.

"I'm glad we're not working today," Derek sighed in relief. "And now that we have a baby coming, I'm never working a holiday ever again."

"Me either," Meredith said. "My mom loved working on holidays when I was a kid, so I was usually dumped with a relative or a neighbor for the day. Or I'd celebrate with the nurses that watched me at the hospital. There's no way in hell I'd ever do that to her," she said definitively, looking down at her belly.

Derek smiled sadly and kissed her temple. He knew how crappy her holidays were as a kid, but the fact that Meredith vowed to make their own daughter's childhood the complete opposite of her own filled him so much love and pride for her. "That's never gonna happen," he promised. "We're going to be here. For everything."

"All of it," Meredith concurred, scratching under Charlie's chin.

"I think Charlie's gonna love her," Derek said with a smile. "Won't you, Charlie?"

Meredith laughed. "I think he'll be jealous. Right now, he's the baby."

"When your yet-to-be-named sister gets here, she'll be the baby, buddy. You're gonna have to look out for her," he grinned.

"He will. You two will be good pals," she said, kissing the top of Charlie's head.

"Hmm…partners in crime," Derek mused.

She nodded in agreement. "Probably, yeah," Meredith said humorously. She took Derek's hand and laced her fingers through his. "Oh, we're still calling your mom tonight to tell her it's a girl, right?"

"Yeah," Derek said, his heart beating a little faster at the thought. "I'm surprised we were able to hold out this long. It's only been two weeks, but still…"

"We're very impressive," she joked. "Mark's not going to accidentally spill the beans, is he?" Meredith asked.

"Nah, I swore him to secrecy before he and Bridget left for New York," Derek chuckled. "Besides, this is the first time Bridget is meeting the family. He's gonna be on top of his game."

Meredith smiled sympathetically. "Poor girl. Your sisters are going to put her through the ringer," she said. "They'll love her though."

"Yeah, she's good for Mark," Derek nodded. "I'm happy for them."

"Me too," Meredith concurred before giggling a little. "I'm kinda going to miss him at Christmas lunch—brunch—or whatever this year. He's always good entertainment."

"The one thing he's good for," Derek said in jest. He pressed a kiss to her temple. "Hungry?"

"Yeah, a little."

Derek pressed his hand over her belly and he grinned. "Hey, sweet potato? I'll go make you and Mommy some breakfast, okay?" he chuckled.

"Sweet potato?" she asked.

"Yeah. That's how big she is now, remember?" Derek smiled.

"Way bigger than a blueberry now." Meredith smiled sweetly at her husband. Derek was just as excited about her pregnancy as she was. And he learned everything there was to know right along with her. She rested her head on his shoulder, breathing him in. "I love you."

"I love you, too," he echoed, kissing the top of her head.

She looked over at the clock on her nightstand, then patted his arm. "We should get up. I want us to have enough time to eat and open gifts before we get ready to go. Plus, our daughter has to eat," Meredith added, as Charlie hopped off her lap, seeming to sense that there would soon be breakfast for him.

"Well, she's in charge," he said playfully, as they finally shimmied out of their bed and began making it.

Meredith laughed. "Yes she is."

...

"Thank you; I love them," Meredith teased, pulling another pair of lounge pants from the gift box she'd just unwrapped.

"These are the same ones we bought over the weekend. Just wrapped," Derek reminded her, laughing.

"Yes, and you did a nice job, too," she complimented as she took another bite of her waffle drowning in syrup. Since giving up coffee, sugar had taken its place. Not in crazy intakes, but enough that when she ate breakfast foods, syrup was always included.

Derek smirked, watching as the syrup dripped from her fork onto the plate. "Hmm…I should've just gotten you a stack of IHOP gift certificates."

"Are you mocking me?" she asked, then gestured to the bump under her shirt. "Don't forget, you made me this way…it just so happens that our daughter wants me to eat syrup-covered waffles."

"Sure, blame her," Derek teased. "Nah, I'm just kidding. I'm glad you have your appetite back. Those first few weeks when you couldn't keep anything down really had me worried. I mean, I know it's normal morning sickness, but still. I'm relieved that's over."

"Me too," Meredith said, munching on her breakfast. "I mean, it sucked for me. But I was more worried about her—you know, that she wasn't getting nutrition because I couldn't keep down a saltine," she sighed, then patted her belly. "Every week, she's growing though."

Derek grinned proudly at her and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Hmm…she is. And so are you."

He looked at the small bump protruding from under her shirt, which hadn't been snug until recently. It was incredible, how much their daughter was growing. Every week, Meredith's belly popped a little more, and before they knew it, she'd be forty weeks along and ready to push. So they intended to savor every day of her pregnancy until she was born.

"I have one last gift for you," Meredith said, using his shoulder for leverage and standing up. "Well, for both of us, I guess. But I bought it so you can open it." She disappeared into the foyer and walked back into the living room holding a box in her hands.

Derek looked at the box curiously after Meredith set it in his lap. "It's for both of us?"

"Yeah," she replied, taking her seat next to him. "Just open it."

He pulled off the green wrapping paper and smiled. "A Doppler?" he asked.

"Yeah. So now, we can listen to her heartbeat whenever we want," she said, watching the smile on his face reach his eyes.

"Wow," Derek said softly. "Can we, uh…can we try it?"

Meredith felt her heart swell at how excited he was. His adoration for their daughter was unlike anything she'd ever witnessed. It made her love him even more. "Yeah," she said.

While Derek removed the packaging and inserted the batteries, Meredith lifted up her shirt a little and squirted some of the blue gel it came with onto her belly. "I can't believe you got one of these," Derek grinned. "How'd you come up with this?"

"One of my patients a few weeks ago mentioned how she and her husband bought one. That night, I ordered one for us," Meredith replied simply. "Go ahead."

"Me?"

"Yeah. Right below my belly button," she said, propping her feet up onto the coffee table and leaning back on the couch.

Derek spread some of the gel around, noticing how her skin prickled with goose bumps. "Sorry. Is it cold?"

"I'm used to it," Meredith replied amusedly. "And it's worth it."

A few moments passed by as Derek found the right spot on her lower belly, and when the echoing _woosh-woosh_ filled their living room, they both gasped. "Found it," Derek murmured in fascination.

"I'll never get used to this," she giggled. A few tears rolled down her cheeks and she reached for a tissue from the box on the end table.

"Me either," Derek said, wiping away his own tears with the back of his hand. "I could listen to her heartbeat all day long."

Meredith leaned in and kissed her husband, soft and slow, as they listened to their daughter's heartbeat, taking in the awe of the beautiful sound that surrounded them. She rested her forehead against his and smiled. "I'm so in love with her."

"Me too."

She glanced over at their most recent ultrasound picture hanging in the frame on their Christmas tree, then to their baby's stocking, hanging in between both of theirs above the fireplace.

Derek's green one, their daughter's pink one, still yet to be embroidered with her name, Meredith's red one, and Charlie's blue one. A family of four.

Of all the gifts given on this day, the gift of their daughter would always be the one they cherished most.

...

Meredith rubbed some cocoa butter cream over her belly, massaging it onto her skin before getting dressed. "Don't wear those," she told Derek just as he was putting his right leg into a pair of black dress pants.

"What? Why?" he asked with a laugh, pulling his leg out.

"Because I'm wearing these pink lounge pants you got for me. And if I show up in those, and you're all dressed up and McDreamy, I'll look like a slob," she pointed out. "Can you wear your jeans?"

"Did you just call me McDreamy?" Derek asked amusedly, though he still pulled his jeans from his closet.

"Yes, I did," she smiled. Meredith put on a long sleeved gray shirt, one that hugged her growing belly, and smoothed it over her bump. "I'd wear jeans too, but I want to dress comfy. Pregnant girl excuse."

"Okay," Derek chuckled. He hopped into his jeans, zipped and buttoned them, then smirked at her. "Any specific shirt you'd like me to wear, dear?"

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Something comfy. Just not anything gray, because then we'll match and that'll be tacky," she said, putting her pants on.

"How's this?" He pulled a long sleeved navy polo shirt from his closet for her to look at, waiting for the 'okay' before putting it on.

Getting dressed was never this much of a process, but ever since Meredith's belly started to pop a little and certain clothes were becoming less comfortable, she always made sure they were somewhat even. If she wasn't getting dressed up, neither could he. Just one of her rules, which Derek found adorable.

"I approve," she said teasingly, biting her lip. Shirtless Derek was sexy, and Meredith was trying not to get all hot and bothered. But the pregnancy hormones made that difficult. Watching him fold laundry turned her on these days.

Derek pulled his shirt on and saw her staring at him. "What?" he grinned.

"Nothing," Meredith shrugged, walking over to him. "I might just need to sex you at this brunch, that's all."

"With a house full of people? Risky. I like it."

"Well, you know…if we get bored. Something to do," she said.

"Okay, then," Derek agreed. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her. "Sounds like a plan."

They finished getting ready, packed toys and food for Charlie, who would be tagging along, and the cookie tray they'd be contributing to the desserts, and made the drive over to their old house, which now belonged to Izzie and Alex.

Charlie ran ahead of them, and Derek pushed the door open, holding it while Meredith and their dog walked in ahead of him. "Hey, you guys!" Izzie greeted. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Iz," Meredith smiled, shimmying off her jacket and placing it next to Derek's on the coat rack.

Alex walked into the foyer and his eyes were glued to Meredith's belly. "Holy crap, Grey. You popped."

"I've been popped for a couple weeks now. You just haven't noticed," she pointed out, looking down at the tiny bump protruding from her shirt. "She's getting bigger."

Izzie placed a gentle hand over Meredith's stomach. "You look so cute."

Lexie opened the kitchen door and interrupted their conversation. "Oh, hey guys!" she called out. "Uh, I think the turkey is done. The timer just went off."

"Okay," Izzie replied. "Appetizers and drinks are set up in the living room," she motioned.

Meredith looked to Derek. "She made a turkey for a brunch?"

"Hmm…I'm glad we came."

Derek and Meredith, with Charlie in tow, entered the living room and found Owen, Cristina, Arizona, and Callie already present, sipping on wine and snacking on the appetizers Izzie had put out. "Hey, guys," Derek grinned.

"Nice of you to join the party," Cristina said sarcastically as she grabbed a handful of chips from the bowl.

"We're not that late," Meredith defended. "Besides, no one plows out in the middle of nowhere. It takes us a while to drive out here in the snow."

"What Cristina means to say is Merry Christmas," Owen laughed.

Meredith giggled. "Yeah, she just says it a little differently."

"So how's your day been so far? Any good gifts?" Arizona asked conversationally.

"Yeah, actually Mer got us a Doppler. So we spent a good hour this morning listening to the baby's heartbeat."

"No kidding?" Callie said with wide eyes. "I'm surprised you were able to shut it off."

Derek chuckled, leaning back on the couch. "We didn't want to run out the batteries. Although I'm sure we'll need new ones in a week."

"How big is she now?" Owen asked.

"The size of a sweet potato," Meredith said, scooping some dip onto a chip. "But if she's anything like in-utero Derek was, she'll grow much, much bigger."

"Baby Gigantor? Cristina asked.

Derek shrugged in agreement. "Nine pounds—well, almost."

Callie winced. "Good God. I wouldn't want a nine pound baby shooting out of me."

"Yes, well, if she weighs nine pounds, she'll be the only baby we ever have." Meredith smiled teasingly at her husband and nudged his hip with hers. "Derek won't be coming near my vagina ever again."

"Wow. Glad I missed the first half of this conversation," Izzie said as she, Alex, Lexie and George entered the increasingly crowded living room.

"Just baby talk," Derek said.

"As usual," Cristina groaned. "I'm gonna need more liquor."

Lexie rolled her eyes. "Oh, stop. It's exciting."

"Any names picked out yet?" George asked.

"Yeah, a few," Meredith replied, smiling. "We haven't settled on anything for sure yet. Picking a name is hard work."

"Well, it's a big decision. Arizona was not an easy name on the playground. I mean, having an unusual name is fine, but just make sure she can handle it," Arizona offered, taking a sip of her wine.

"So far, I think what we have is pretty normal," Derek said.

Izzie looked to the two of them expectantly. "Well…"

Meredith laughed, but decided to give in and share their name choices. Input was always helpful. "We have, uh…Abigail, Emmeline, Lyla…"

"Leah and Lucy," Derek added. "That's all so far."

"Ooh, Leah," Izzie all but cooed. "If you two don't use that, Alex and I have dibs."

Alex looked over at his wife and laughed. "Since when are you pregnant?"

"I'm not. I'm just saying," Izzie said. "All of those names are beautiful. And they would all sound good with Shepherd."

"My parents almost named Molly 'Abigail,'" Lexie informed them. "But apparently, they didn't want us both to have the same initials—Alexandra and Abigail—so they went with Molly instead."

"Fascinating," Cristina said sarcastically.

"No, that's a good point," Izzie piped up. "Are you going to give all your kids the same letter? Some parents do that."

"I don't know. I guess if we find two names we love, then yeah. It depends."

"We just want to pick something before she's born," Derek said amusedly. "Paging through the baby name book while Mer's pushing wouldn't be good."

"Again, just let me know what you pick, so I can have stuff made up for the baby shower—which, by the way, is already being planned," Izzie said with a smile.

"I'm not due for five months," Meredith reminded her.

"Yes, but I want it to be perfect. You're the first ones in the group to have a baby. It's a big deal," Izzie countered.

Meredith giggled, surprised at how much their friends were interested in all things Baby Shepherd. But she appreciated it. This is what families did, or so she was learning. "Okay."

After brunch was finally served, and everyone was relaxing back in the living room where they started, Meredith was ready to make good on her sex proposal that she and Derek talked about earlier. And when Owen pulled out the guitar, she knew it was prime time to make her move.

She got up off the couch with her empty glass and walked into the kitchen, glancing back quickly and raising her eyebrows at Derek, signaling for him to follow her. Meredith opened the kitchen door, and Derek meandered in right after her, a grin on his face. "Now?" he asked.

"Well, unless you want to partake in the sing-a-long," Meredith smirked.

"No, I'll pass," Derek laughed. "So…where?"

"Upstairs bathroom?"

"Hmm, just like last Thanksgiving," he reminisced, leaning in and kissing her.

Meredith moaned against his lips. Now she definitely needed the sex. "You know, for the sake of nostalgia and all," she said softly, running her fingers through his hair.

"Meet you up there?"

She smiled. "I'll be waiting."

If Izzie insisted upon a holiday brunch, they were going to make the most of it.

...

Later on that night, they were settled on the couch, hot chocolate in hand, per Meredith's insistence. She'd been craving it all day, so when they got home from the brunch, Derek made them some. Now on cup number three, Meredith was still going strong. Chocolate was high on her list of pregnancy wants.

Derek flipped on the television to _How the Grinch Stole Christmas_, one of the few holiday cartoons Meredith actually found amusing, not because of its warm and fuzzy cuteness, but because she found the people of Whoville to be, as she put it, 'complete and total morons' for letting the Grinch do what he did and not even ask for an apology. Seeing it from Meredith's perspective actually made watching it much more fun.

Meredith curled into him and rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you for the hot chocolate."

"You're welcome," Derek chuckled, pressing a kiss to her temple.

"Merry Christmas, Derek," she sighed contentedly.

"Merry Christmas," he said softly. Derek placed a hand over her belly and felt the warmth of her skin on his palm. "Our daughter is very popular with our friends."

Meredith put her hand next to his and smiled proudly. "That's because she's awesome."

"Best baby ever," Derek echoed.

"Want to call your mom now?" she asked.

"Oh, yeah. Almost forgot about that," he said, the excitement in his voice as he reached over to the end table and grabbed the phone.

Meredith tapped her fingers anxiously against her belly as Derek dialed his old phone number. After three rings, Linda picked up, and, given how happy she sounded, had probably been expecting their call.

"Hello, you two," she greeted cheerfully. "You know, I was just about to call."

"We would've called earlier, but with everyone over at the house, we figured we'd wait," Derek said. "So how was the day? How do you like Bridget?"

"She's the best thing that ever happened to that boy. We all love her," Linda lauded.

"Nancy, too?" Derek teased.

"Oh, be nice. She's your sister. She just…likes to meddle," Linda explained humorously. "Is Meredith there, dear?"

Meredith smiled. "Yep, I'm here. How're you doing?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm fine, sweetheart. You know, everywhere I go, I show people the ultrasound pictures you gave me. Everyone I know knows I'm having another grandchild. And when I show them a picture of you two—the one from the wedding—they all tell me what a beautiful baby this is going to be. Although, I already know that," Derek's mother bragged. "How are you feeling, dear? How's my grandchild treating you?"

"I feel great," she answered. "Baby is growing every day. Derek convinced me to buy some maternity clothes."

"I'm sure you look beautiful. Email me some pictures. I'd love to see your belly. Mark tells me you've popped," Linda said happily.

Meredith shook her head and laughed. "Oh, did he?"

"He's so excited for you two. During dinner tonight, he and Bridget went on and on about you—how happy you are. You know, I think he aspires to what the two of you have."

"Well, we're glad he's finally settling down. Since he met her, I've never seen him so happy," Meredith said.

Derek took Meredith's hand and placed them over her belly. "Actually, Mom, we have some news…"

"What's that, dear?" she asked.

"We found out the sex a couple weeks ago," Meredith said, smiling at Derek.

"You did? Oh, your sisters and I were hoping you would! What is it, sweetheart? Please don't tell me you're keeping it a secret. Now that you've said that, I need to know," Linda said, her voice high pitched in anticipation.

Derek chuckled softly. "No, we're not keeping it a secret," he assured her. He nodded for Meredith to break the news but she shook her head.

"You tell her," Meredith whispered, squeezing her husband's hand. This was something she wanted Derek to tell his mother. Something like this should come from her son, and Meredith wanted him to have that.

"We're having a little girl," Derek said, tears pooling in his eyes as soon as the words were out. His mother had been waiting for a child from him for years. And now that he could share the news of his daughter with her, it was a moment he'd never forget.

There was silence for a few moments before Linda finally able to say something. "Oh my God," she choked out. "A baby girl?"

"Yep," Meredith breathed, wiping away a few of her own tears with the sides of her fingers.

"Granddaughter number ten," Derek said proudly as he kissed Meredith's temple. "We're so excited."

"Oh my…" she trailed off. Linda put her hand over the receiver and called out to the rest of the family, still gathered in the Shepherd family living room. "They're having a girl!"

Cheers and claps resonated through the room and into the phone, and they both laughed. "Thanks, Ma," Derek chuckled. "Saves us the trouble of having to call everyone."

"I knew it was a girl this whole time," they heard Mark call out amongst the group.

"What do you mean you knew?" Linda asked, seemingly forgetting that her son and daughter-in-law were still on the phone.

Meredith giggled. "Yeah, we swore him to secrecy."

"Tell him and Bridget we said hi, by the way," Derek added. "So, yeah…baby girl."

"You know, I had a hunch. Ask your sisters. I always said that my only son is going to have a house full of daughters," Linda told them.

"I grew up in a house full of girls. Now I get to spend my life with two more—well, at least two more. Chances are, we'll have another girl next time around. Which is fine with me, by the way," Derek chuckled. He glanced over at Meredith and smiled. "Surrounded by my beautiful girls…that's a good life."

Meredith rested her head on Derek's shoulder. Seeing him this happy? Kind of the best Christmas gift ever. Well, besides their daughter. She was one present that could never be topped.


	85. A Good Year to Come

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but I don't. ****So sorry I haven't been able to post more. Between work and vacation and getting sick, writing took a bit of a back seat. I'm doing my best to bank as many updates as I can before school starts again in a few weeks. :)**

Another New Year's Eve was upon them. And like last year, Meredith and Derek were working instead of reveling in the holiday at home like nearly everyone else. But because of Derek's skillful planning, he only scheduled two surgeries for the morning, so that the rest of the day would be theirs.

Surgery number two was done by noon, and Meredith walked to the nurses' station to deposit the patient's chart. Just as she was about to turn around and head for the resident lounge, she stopped in her tracks.

"Hi, Mehdif!" she heard a tiny voice call out.

Meredith spun around on her heels, then felt a slight tug on her scrub pants. She looked down and smiled. "Hi there," she giggled curiously, meeting the eyes of her three year old niece.

Laura waved up at her. "Hi," she repeated.

Lexie was standing a few feet away, frantically scribbling something down in a chart. Meredith bit her lip, trying to piece the puzzle together, but came up with nothing. "Uh, is she…what are you…?" Meredith asked, gesturing to Laura, who was dancing in little circles on the tiled floor.

Lexie looked up from her chart and sighed. "Oh, Mer. I'm glad you're here. Could you page George for me? Or Izzie? I would, but I'm swamped and I have to see if one of them can watch her for me while I'm in surgery."

Meredith eyed her sister suspiciously, waiting for more of an explanation, and Lexie ran a hand through her hair. "I'm babysitting. Or I was babysitting. See, I had the day off today, so I volunteered to watch her. Molly and Eric haven't had a New Year's Eve to themselves since before Laura was born, so I offered to watch her for the day and they were going to pick her up tonight. But then I got paged for surgery, and I…"

Meredith crossed her arms over her chest and smirked at her sister amusedly. "And you're planning to let her dance around in the OR?" she laughed, watching as Laura continued to twirl around carelessly, a Dora the Explorer doll in her hand.

"Well, no. Of course not. I just…" She paused. "Okay, I admit. I haven't thought this through all the way. But Dr. Robbins has this amazing surgery and I couldn't pass it up, so I just brought her here. Please stop looking at me like that. I didn't expect to get paged today."

Meredith saw the desperateness in her face, and decided to step in and lend a hand. That's what sisters did, and she knew Lexie needed help. "My shift is over in ten minutes. Why don't you let Derek and me watch her for a few hours?"

Lexie shook her head. "No, I couldn't. It's New Year's Eve. I'm sure you and Derek have plans," she said.

"No, we don't," Meredith replied. "Unless you count grocery shopping."

Lexie narrowed her eyes at her sister, as if waiting to see what 'grocery shopping' was code for. Meredith laughed. "Pregnant, remember?" she said, pointing to her belly. "Derek and I are homey now. Not really going clubbing or anything."

"So that's really all you had planned?"

"I've been craving brownies and ice cream all week, but we have neither, so we're going to pick up some things after work. Then I plan on making Derek cook stuff for me," Meredith giggled. Not really a thrilling New Year's Eve, but it worked for them. And honestly, she really just wanted brownies.

"I don't know…" Lexie said hesitantly.

"If you don't think Molly and Eric would be okay with it, that's fine. But I—" Meredith started.

Lexie shook her head quickly. "No, no; it's not that. They trust you guys. You're family. But I just feel bad putting you out."

"Really, it's no big deal," Meredith reiterated.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Meredith nodded, a hand draped over her growing bump. "Derek and I could use some practice now that we have a baby coming."

"Okay," Lexie gave in. "But if she gets to be too much, just bring her back here. I'll watch her."

Meredith waved her off. "We'll be fine, I promise."

Lexie knelt down on the floor and smiled at their niece. "Laur, how would you like to spend a few hours with Aunt Meredith?"

"And Dewek?" the toddler asked, her green eyes wide in excitement.

"Derek, too," Lexie laughed. "Sound like fun?"

"Uh huh," Laura nodded enthusiastically.

Meredith smiled when the girl took hold of her hand and squeezed it. "Hey, Laur. I like your doll."

"Dora," Laura told her, holding the doll out for Meredith to see.

"Oh, I know all about Dora. And Boots and Backpack and Swiper," Meredith said proudly, recalling when Derek had given her the 411 on the cartoon. It came in handy, especially now.

Laura's eyes lit up and she laughed. "Uh huh! She's on my shirt, too," she pointed.

"Very cool," Meredith played along. "What do you say? Want to go find Uncle Derek? Then we can go shopping, then we can watch Dora?"

"Yeah," Laura clapped. "We goin' now?"

"She's very easy going," Lexie said, humored by her niece's carefree demeanor. "Here's her backpack."

"Oh, it's Backpack," Meredith said, recognizing the purple backpack from the cartoon. She really had to remember to thank Derek for sharing his extensive knowledge of kid shows with her. Otherwise, her niece wouldn't find her nearly as cool. Lexie looked at her strangely and Meredith laughed. "There are fifteen nieces and nephews on Derek's side of the family. He knows things."

"Aah, got it," Lexie said. "Okay, here are my keys. Her car seat is in the backseat, and there's some toys in there, too. Just drop the keys off in my cubby when you're done."

"Okay, no problem," Meredith said, though she wasn't so sure herself. "Oh, and she's…is she potty trained?"

Lexie nodded. "Yeah, she is. And she's pretty good about telling you when she has to go."

"I go on the potty now. I a big girl," Laura announced proudly.

"Yes you are," Meredith agreed seriously. She looked to Lexie again and smiled reassuringly, perhaps more for her own benefit than Lexie's. She never babysat a toddler before, but she knew that with Derek there, they could handle it. "We'll be fine, really," she said once more, putting the backpack over her arm. "Come on, Laur. Let's go find Derek."

"Bye-bye, Lex," Laura said with a smile, giving her aunt a wave before happily walking down the hall with Meredith.

"Bye, sweetie," Lexie replied. "And Mer, call me if there's any problems. I should be over to pick her up around five, no later. Thank you. Really, I owe you for this one."

Meredith looked from their little niece to Lexie and smiled. "Hey, I'll be doing it soon enough anyway once she's born," she said, nodding to her belly. "It'll be fun."

She reached the elevator and lifted Laura into her arms, so she was sitting on her hip. "Want to press the button?"

"Uh huh," Laura nodded, pointing her finger. "Up?"

"Yes, up," Meredith giggled. "So we can go see Derek and I can get changed."

"Dewek?"

The elevator doors opened and Meredith stepped inside, carrying her niece, the backpack, and her own daughter inside her belly. On the job training of motherhood if she'd ever experienced it. "Yep, to see Derek. Okay, press the four."

"Four," Laura echoed, pressing the correct button and watching as it lit up.

"Very good," Meredith praised.

The elevator ascended up the next floor, and Meredith stepped off and headed toward the resident lounge so she could change out of her scrubs and pack up her bag. She smiled when she saw Derek leaning against the wall next to the lounge door waiting for her. "Hey," she said.

Derek looked up from his phone and smiled confusedly. "Hi," he returned. "What are you…?"

"Hi!" Laura said, waving to him.

"Hey, sweetie," Derek chuckled. Laura reached out for him and he took her off Meredith's hip and scooped her into his arms.

"Lexie was watching her, then she got paged into work, so I offered to take her for a few hours. You don't mind, right?" Meredith asked.

Derek shook his head. "No, it's fine. We always have fun, right Laur?" he asked.

Laura smiled up at him and nodded. "Uh huh," she said sweetly.

Meredith pulled Lexie's keys from her pocket and handed them to Derek. "I have to get changed. Would you mind getting her car seat out of Lexie's car and putting it in ours? Oh, and there's toys in there, too."

"Yeah, sure," Derek replied. "Want me to take her with me?"

"No, it's okay. I'll bring her down once I'm done and meet you in the lobby," Meredith said. "Thank you, Der." She leaned in and kissed her husband's cheek as he handed Laura back to her.

"Good practice, right?" he grinned.

"Yep, that's what I said," Meredith laughed. "Okay. See you downstairs in a few."

She walked into the resident lounge and set Laura down on one of the benches so she could get changed. When she pulled her scrub top over her head, she heard her little niece let out a gasp. "What's the matter, hun? You okay?"

"Baby," Laura whispered in awe, pointing to Meredith's pregnant belly, which had been slightly obscured by her scrubs. But now, with only her tighter fitting blue shirt underneath, the bump was far more noticeable.

Meredith ran her hands over her belly and smiled. "There is a baby in here, Laur," she agreed. "A baby girl."

"Baby girl?"

"Yeah, so when she's born, you two will be cousins," Meredith explained as she quickly changed into her stretchy black lounge pants.

Laura looked up at Meredith excitedly. "Cousin?"

"Yep. And you can look out for her…like a big sister. How's that sound?" Meredith said with a smile, tossing her scrubs into the bin.

Laura cradled her Dora doll in her arms and she giggled. "And I can hold her?"

"Sure, sweetie. You can hold her," she replied. She slipped her coat on, grabbed her bag off the hook, and helped Laura off the bench onto her feet. "Okay, all done. Let's go."

As they were taking the elevator down to the first floor, Cristina got on, an amused smirk covering her face as soon as she saw Meredith holding the hand of her niece. "Oh, this is priceless," she teased.

"Shut up. I'm being sisterly," Meredith retorted.

"Lexipedia owes you for this one, huh?"

"Hi," Laura greeted, waving up at Cristina.

"Hi," Cristina replied, managing to smile at the toddler. "So you and Derek are getting a taste of parenthood. Do you have her all night?"

Meredith shook her head. "Until five. Then Lexie's picking her up. We're gonna make brownies," she said cheekily.

"Well, at least you can still ring in 2010 with some s-e-x after she leaves, right?" Cristina pointed out, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. The elevator doors opened and she stepped off. "Have…fun."

"Oh, we will," Meredith assured her. "Happy 2010."

"Yeah, you too," she responded.

When the elevator stopped on the first floor, Meredith gave Laura's hand a squeeze. "Okay, let's go find Derek."

They walked over to where Derek was waiting for them in the lobby, and he stood up from his chair. "Hey. All set?"

"Yeah. I just need to button her coat. Can you carry her out to the car? The parking lot is busy and I'd rather her not walk," Meredith said, kneeling down and zipping up Laura's pink coat, then putting up her hood to protect her from the December cold outside.

Derek watched as Meredith went into Mommy mode, and he couldn't help but smile widely. Seeing her with their niece was a glimpse into their future, what it would be like when their own daughter was born.

He picked Laura up into his arms and kissed her cheek. "Ready, Laur?"

"Where we going?" Laura asked, wrapping one of her arms around Derek's neck as the three of them walked outside.

"To the food store," Meredith answered. "Even though going to the food store on New Year's Eve is probably not a good idea…"

"But Aunt Meredith has had a craving for brownies all week, so if we don't go, she'll yell at me," Derek joked, winking playfully at Meredith as he opened the car door and set Laura in her car seat.

Meredith slid into the passenger seat and glanced to the backseat, giving Derek a smirk. "Yes, well, I crave something else a lot these days, too. And Uncle Derek never minds fulfilling that one for me."

"And I never will." After Laura was strapped safely into her car seat, Derek walked around to the driver's side and slipped into the seat.

Meredith smiled at him as she turned on the heater. "I know," she said. "And I appreciate that."

"Hmm…" Derek hummed, leaning over the console and kissing her cheek. "Any time."

"So, how do we entertain a three year old in a food store?" Meredith asked as she tapped her fingers against her belly.

"Usually cookies do the trick," Derek chuckled. "Or the free cheese slices they give out at the deli counter."

"Ooh, cheese. We need to buy some of that. String cheese. And some Velveeta, too. Which means we need tortilla chips," Meredith said, pulling a notepad and a pen from her tote bag at her feet and writing down a makeshift shopping list.

Derek laughed. Cheese was another of his wife's cravings, and he found it adorable. "Okay."

"I love cheese!" Laura squealed from the backseat, her pigtails bopping back and forth as she wiggled around in her car seat.

"You do?" Meredith giggled.

Laura nodded. "Uh huh."

"Definitely your niece," Derek teased. "She looks just like you, you know, in those pictures from when you were little—especially the ones from your third birthday."

"Well, the Grey gene seems pretty dominant then," Meredith giggled softly. She looked down at her belly, popping out a little from beneath her jacket, and smiled. "I guess we know what our daughter is going to look like—only, half you, obviously. And with the Shepherd hair."

"I'd love it if she looked just like you," Derek said, taking her hand in his. "Only with my hair."

"Good. At least if she's born with thick, dark hair, we can put a bow in it for her newborn pictures," Meredith said, excited just at the prospect of finding out what their little girl would look like, even if they wouldn't know for months yet.

Derek let out a breath and chuckled softly. "God, she's gonna be beautiful."

"Yeah, she is." A few unexpected tears slipped from Meredith's eyes and she laughed embarrassedly, grabbing a tissue from her coat pocket.

"You okay?" he asked, pulling into the parking lot of the supermarket, which was only a few blocks from the hospital.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "Pregnant. No emotional censors." She patted her cheeks dry and looked over at her husband. "In a few months, we'll have a daughter in the backseat, in her own car seat. It's just crazy. In the best possible way."

Derek parked the car in a spot near the entrance and leaned over to kiss her. "I can't wait."

Meredith wiped away the last of her tears then glanced back at Laura in the backseat. "Want me to get her?" she asked Derek.

"You're already carrying one little girl. I can carry the other little girl," he winked.

"Okay."

They gathered up Laura and a few of her toys to keep her occupied, got a cart and entered the store. And the first thing they noticed: it was crowded. Last minute shoppers were racing around for their New Year's Eve items. Food, beverages, party hats, and the like. Not the most ideal day for a shopping outing.

"Stay with me. It would be bad if we got separated in this madhouse," Meredith told Derek as he sat Laura in the front seat of the cart, securing the buckle around her waist.

"Okay," Derek agreed. He handed Laura her doll and smiled. "There we go. All set."

"First thing on the list: brownie mix," Meredith said. Pregnancy cravings were serious business, and if she wasn't eating the baked good by midnight, she thought she might lose her mind.

"Okay," he chuckled, amused by how fervent she was. "Aisle eight."

They passed by the fruit section on the way there, and Meredith patted Derek's arm so he would stop pushing the cart. "Wait. Bananas, Der."

"What about them?"

"I want to get some." Meredith grabbed a bunch from the display and put them in a plastic bag. "Ooh. And fruit dip. Where's that?" she asked, getting some strawberries too for good measure.

"Fruit craving?" Derek assumed, smiling at her.

Meredith nodded, running her hand quickly over her belly. "We both like fruit. And fruit dip."

Derek spotted it on the shelf and reached for the jar. "Here you go."

"Thank you."

"I'm hungry," Laura said, looking at them expectantly to do something about it.

Meredith laughed. "Okay, let's go find something for you."

They continued the trek to aisle eight, weaving through carts and people that seemed to take over every inch of the store. "Must be nice being three. You say you're hungry and people cater to you immediately," Derek chuckled.

"I'm thirty three and you do it for me," Meredith reminded him playfully. "That's why we're out buying brownie mix on New Year's Eve. And when we get home, he's going to make them for us, Laur."

"I love brownies," the three year old giggled.

"You do? Do you like ice cream, too?" Derek asked, as they finally made it to the aisle with the baked goods.

"Yes," she nodded. "Chocolate."

"Hmm…you and I are definitely related," Meredith said, standing in front of the shelf and surveying the variety of brownie mixes to buy. "Double fudge?"

"Yes!" Laura cheered, clapping her hands excitedly.

Meredith put the box in the cart then kissed the top of her niece's head. "Okay. Double fudge it is."

"Cookies?" Laura asked, pointing to the other side of the aisle, complete with shelves upon shelves of them.

Meredith looked to Derek and bit her lip; he laughed. "It's New Year's Eve. If she wants cookies, I say give her cookies. Right, Laur?"

"Right," Laura echoed.

"Well, we know when our daughter's born, she's going to play you like a fiddle," Meredith giggled. "You're such a pushover."

"I can't say no to pretty girls. What can I say?" He pressed a kiss to Meredith's cheek then turned his attention to Laura. "What kind, hun? We've got Oreos, Chips Ahoy, E.L. Fudge…"

"Uh…Oreos," Laura decided, pointing to the blue cookie bags on the shelf. "I have some now?"

Meredith smiled as she took them from the shelf. "Yes, you can have some now." She opened the bag up and handed one to her niece before taking one out for herself. "Because I want some now," she added.

When Derek looked over at her and smirked, she nudged his hip with hers. "Okay, you can stop with the face. I see food; I eat it. Pregnancy, Derek. It's a strange thing…"

"What? I wasn't making fun. I love pregnant you." Derek leaned in and kissed her, his hands snaking around her waist.

Meredith moaned against his lips, resisting the urge to push him up against the shelves and French the hell out of him. But with their three year old niece watching, not to mention a store full of people, that probably wouldn't be the best idea. And when Laura took notice, time was up.

"Oooh!" Laura squealed, amused by the two of them kissing each other.

"Busted," Derek murmured against her lips, sneaking in one more kiss before pulling back.

Meredith ran the hand that wasn't holding the bag of Oreos through her hair in an attempt to recompose herself. "See? This is why we shouldn't kiss in public," she said breathlessly.

"That won't stop me," Derek countered, grinning at her. He brushed his cheek against hers and she felt his stubble against her skin. "And I plan on making it up to you later."

Meredith blushed, a light shade of pink burning her cheeks. "Derek."

"It's New Year's Eve. It's all about the celebration," he reminded her.

They continued walking down the aisle, heading for the frozen foods section to pick up the ice cream Meredith insisted on, and she leaned into him, smiling at how happy Laura looked munching on her cookie.

When they were out of earshot of anyone around them, Meredith spoke, quietly enough so that Laura couldn't hear. "Well, we don't need c-o-n-d-o-m-s this year, seeing as you knocked me up and all," she giggled.

"Hmm...we stuck to our resolutions," Derek said proudly, kissing her temple. "We made a baby."

Meredith splayed her fingers over her belly and sighed contentedly. "Yes we did."

...

Back at the house, it was a little after four when Derek took the brownies from the oven. Still eight hours until midnight and both he and Meredith were exhausted.

Meredith sat at the island, Laura sitting on her lap, as she scooped ice cream into three bowls, one for each of them. "Don't the brownies smell good, Laur?"

"When can we eat them?" she asked, looking up at her aunt.

Meredith smiled at the little girl. It was like looking at the spitting image of herself, thirty years ago. "In a few minutes. They're still too hot."

"But we can eat the ice cream now," Derek grinned, grabbing three spoons from the drawer.

"Before it melts," Laura added smartly, adjusting herself on Meredith's lap, which wasn't so easy to sit on with the growing bump getting in the way.

Derek noticed and propped Laura on his own lap. "That's better. Aunt Mer's growing a baby in her belly. We'll give her a break," he chuckled.

Meredith spooned some ice cream into her mouth and smiled at her husband. "Thank you."

"I gonna be a cousin," Laura informed Derek before taking her own heaping spoonful of ice cream.

"Yes you are," Derek nodded. "That's a very important job. Are you going to come visit us once the baby is born?"

"Uh huh. And I gonna hold her," Laura said. "Just like I hold my dolls."

"Oh, well okay then," Derek chuckled. "Sounds like you'll be a good cousin."

Meredith slid the brownie pan and knife in front of her, deciding they'd waited long enough for them to cool down. When she felt the heat rising off of them, she just shrugged. Hot brownies and cold ice cream. Didn't get any better.

"I've been waiting for these for a week," Meredith said as she cut slices for the three of them. "You really have no idea how excited I am."

Just as Meredith was about to bite into her brownie, Laura looked over at her, a slight panic in her eyes. "I gotta go potty!" she announced.

Parental instinct took over and Derek set the little girl to her feet; Meredith reluctantly dropped her brownie onto her dish and smiled. "Okay, I'll take you sweetie. Come on," she said, taking hold of Laura's tiny hand.

Derek grinned with pride as Meredith scurried out of the room with their niece to the bathroom. It never ceased to surprise him how good she was with kids. Back when they first got together again, she'd claimed a baby would never want her. But the truth was, any baby would be lucky to have her as a mom. He glanced over to the array of ultrasound pictures on their fridge and smiled. Their daughter would be the luckiest little girl ever.

...

"Mer," Derek whispered, softly rubbing Meredith's arm to wake her up. It was 11:50, just ten minutes to midnight, and they'd both fallen asleep. By some stroke of luck, Derek woke up and glanced at the clock, surprised to find out that they'd nearly missed 2010's grand entrance.

As it turns out, an afternoon out with a toddler was a lot of work. But still fun, nonetheless. Lexie's surgery ran late, and it was after six when she could finally come by to pick her up. And by the time they got her packed up to go, cleaned up the kitchen, showered, ate dinner, and got a chance to relax, it was already eight. Relaxing on the couch probably wasn't the best idea, considering that as soon as they sat down, sleep was quick to follow.

Meredith's eyelids opened slowly and she looked up at her husband, adjusting her head on his lap. "Hmm…what?"

"It's almost midnight," Derek informed her, running a tired hand through his hair.

"Crap. How long were we asleep?" Meredith asked as she slowly sat up. She pulled the throw blanket over them and rested her head on Derek's shoulder, Charlie on the other side of him, carelessly sleeping the night away.

"Almost four hours," he chuckled.

Meredith rolled her eyes and sighed amusedly. "And to think, we were going to have marathon sex tonight," she said. "We've turned into _that_ couple—the ones that can't even stay awake until midnight on New Year's Eve," she giggled.

"Well, with Laura here all afternoon, can't really blame us for being tired," Derek pointed out, stifling a yawn as he un-muted the TV in preparation for the Times Square coverage that was being rebroadcasted for the west coast viewers.

"I really do want Laura and our daughter to be close. I mean, she's the only cousin on this side of the country," Meredith pointed out. "I just think it'd be kinda nice if they grew up together."

"See, family isn't so bad, is it?" Derek chuckled, earning him a playful nudge with her hip. "For what it's worth, I'm glad you and your dad are making it work. You and Lexie are close. And Molly and Eric are great. You deserve a family - an extended family, I mean. You'll always have the three of us forever," he smiled, referring to himself, their daughter, and Charlie.

"Good," she whispered, kissing his cheek. She looked at the countdown clock on the TV and sighed, humored by their four hour nap they didn't mean to take. "Guess that means we'll definitely be asleep next year then. We'll be even more exhausted with a six month old," Meredith smiled, as she ran a hand over her blanket-covered belly.

"Hmm," Derek hummed, a grin coming over his face. "Next year, she'll be sleeping in between us."

"Curled up in our bed with us." Meredith took his hand and rested it on top of her belly, laying her own hand right next to his. She met Derek's eyes and he noticed the tears threatening to spill over her lids.

"You okay?" he asked.

Meredith nodded, her voice cracking as she spoke. "Yeah," she said. "It's just…I'm happy. Really happy, that's all."

Derek kissed her temple. "Me too."

"You know, today, with Laura being here, it just hit me. That's our life from now on—or it will be once the baby is born. And three years ago? That would have scared the crap out of me. The idea of being married and having a baby in a few months…I would have run far, far away," she said, managing to laugh.

"I wouldn't have believed it either," Derek concurred. "But I wouldn't trade this for anything."

"I don't know how I _couldn't_ have wanted this. When I look back at how things were, and how they are now…" She wiped a tear that slipped down her cheek with her hand. "I'm just grateful, that's all. Grateful for you, and Charlie, and her," Meredith said softly, looking down at her bump.

"Me too," Derek whispered, leaning in to kiss her, showing her just how much he loved her. When they pulled back, he lifted up her shirt a little and kissed her swollen belly, growing rounder each day as their daughter grew inside her.

The muffled cheering coming from the TV escalated as the ball dropped, and they could hear fireworks cracking somewhere off in the distance. Derek smiled against her skin. "I love you," he said to her belly, then raised his head to meet hers. "And I love you."

Meredith rested her forehead against his and took in this moment, surrounded by her family. Her husband, their sweet potato-sized daughter inside her, and their dog. "We're having a baby this year," she said in awe as the realization that 2010 was here.

The countdown to May 29th was getting closer than ever now.

Tears burned in Derek's eyes at the thought and he grinned at her. "We're having a baby this year," he echoed.

Only a minute into the New Year, and they already knew, it was going to be a year they would always remember.


	86. Vacation's Over

**Disclaimer: Don't own it.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I appreciate each and every one so much.**

Getting out of a warm bed on a cold January day was tough enough as it was, but being nineteen weeks pregnant made the daily occurrence even less appealing. Meredith nudged Derek's arm when the noise of the alarm clock blared through Derek's office. It was unquestionably their least favorite sound.

"Der," Meredith muttered, drawing her pillow over her head. "Der, shut it off."

Derek groaned as he was pulled from his sleep. He reached up to his desk and groped around until he found the clock, then flicked the off switch. The silence that permeated was bliss, and Meredith sighed. "Thank you."

"Hmm, five more minutes," Derek said, wrapping his arm around her, both of their hands finding her belly under the blankets.

She let her eyes fall closed again and just as she was about to slip back into sleep, Meredith felt the signature flutters of their daughter's movements inside her. "Sleep," she soothed, rubbing her hand over her belly.

With surgeons for parents, ones that were slaves to the alarm clock, Meredith swore that every time it went off in the morning, their daughter could hear it, and had already been conditioned to wake up at the sound.

"Hmm?" Derek murmured.

"I can feel her moving a little," Meredith giggled tiredly. "Definitely gets that from you—the morning person-ness."

Derek buried his face in Meredith's hair, breathing in the lavender. "Is that a good thing?"

"No, because I'm not a morning person," she said with a yawn.

"Today, I'm not either," Derek replied. He knew they'd have to get up some time soon, but the prospect of getting out from under the covers just wasn't what he wanted to do.

Meredith rolled onto her back and smiled sleepily at her husband. "Quickie?"

"There's an idea," Derek chuckled as his eyes adjusted to the little slats of light pouring into his office from between the blinds. He pressed his lips to her neck and smiled against the warmth of her skin.

"Derek," she moaned, arching her back at his affections. It didn't take much for Derek to turn her on, especially nowadays with her hormones on overdrive.

Just as he was about to pull her shirt over her head, the beeping of their pagers took over the quietness, and they both groaned at the interruption. "Damn," Meredith sighed.

"Yeah." Derek ran a hand through his hair then sat up on the bed. He reached for both of their pagers sitting on top of his desk and read them. 911.

"What is it?" Meredith asked.

"911. We have to get down to the pit," Derek replied.

"Awesome," Meredith said sarcastically, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. Not even out of bed, and this day was already off to a hectic start.

After quickly brushing their teeth and making themselves somewhat presentable for the busy day ahead, they took the elevator down the five floors to the pit, picking up two granola bars on the way. Meredith liked to eat as soon as she woke up, both to ward off the queasiness, and feed their daughter. And they both needed something in their stomachs to keep up their energy. A morning in the pit was always unpredictable, and they needed all the help they could get.

They could hear the commotion as soon as they stepped off the elevator, and entered the double doors to the pit, holding their breaths in preparation for what they would see. "What happened?" Derek asked Olivia, who was wheeling one of the patients into the trauma bay.

"Multiple MVCs. There was a pileup on the highway about a half hour ago. They're just rolling in now," Olivia explained before disappearing into one of the trauma rooms.

"Okay," Derek nodded, swallowing the last of his granola bar.

Meredith bit into her last piece, and they both tossed the wrappers into the nearest trashcan. "We should probably go and wait for the ambulances," she suggested. "That way we can try to get dibs on whatever comes in."

"Yeah," Derek agreed.

They got gowned up, pulled on some gloves, and just as they walked outside, another ambulance pulled up to the doors. "What've we got?" Derek asked after the paramedics lifted the gurney out of the back.

"Jenna O'Keefe, age seventeen. She was involved in the pileup. Obvious forehead contusion and laceration; also complaining of cramping in the abdomen," Jill, the paramedic, explained, handing over the chart to Meredith as they wheeled the girl into the third trauma room.

"Okay," Meredith acknowledged. "Jenna, I'm Dr…I'm Meredith. Dr. Shepherd and I are going to check you to make sure you're okay."

"Okay," the teenage girl nodded.

Derek took his penlight from his pocket and examined Jenna's pupils while Meredith flipped open a new patient chart to take down notes. "You said you're having some cramping," she said. "Any chance of pregnancy?"

Jenna shook her head. "No. I broke up with my boyfriend back in August, right before I started college. I found out the ass was sleeping with someone else, so I broke it off. I live in Chicago, but I go to school here. Haven't talked to him since. No sex for me," she sighed.

"Okay," Meredith nodded, trying not to show her amusement over the teenage drama. She remembered those days, and had no desire to revisit them. "Are these cramps like menstrual cramps? When was your last period?" she asked.

Jenna's face turned red in embarrassment and she cocked her head toward Derek. "Not in front of the hot doctor," she gasped.

Derek couldn't help but laugh. "I have a wife and four sisters. Believe me, I've heard it all," he replied nonchalantly as he palpated the girl's skull to make sure it checked out okay.

"Um…" Jenna tried to recall. "Oh, around New Year's. About two weeks ago."

"Okay. So it shouldn't be cramps," Meredith deduced. "Are the pains sharp or dull?"

"Sharp. I think I banged my stomach on the steering wheel when I hit the car in front of me. I've been in pain ever since then," Jenna answered.

Derek scribbled his name down in the chart and looked to the girl. "Okay, your head checks out fine. I'm going to have Dr. Sloan come in to sew up your forehead," he told her. He smiled at Meredith on his way out of the room, and she smiled in return.

"Okay, can you lie back for an exam? I want to check your abdomen so you can tell me where the pain is," Meredith said.

Jenna reclined back on the table and lifted up her shirt, and Meredith began pressing her fingers into the girl's torso, trying to determine the source of the pain. "It might be undiagnosed appendicitis, and the accident triggered your symptoms. Or you may have ruptured your spleen," she explained. "Let's just check to make sure—"

When she felt a mass underneath Jenna's skin, she bit her lip in confusion. Meredith had a hunch, but wasn't going to say anything until she knew for sure. "I'll be right back; I need to go get something. Sit tight," she said comfortingly, patting Jenna's shoulder.

Meredith left the room and went in search of the nearest ultrasound machine. When Derek spotted her looking around, he waved her over. "Mer, what's the matter?"

"I need an ultrasound machine," she said.

"Jenna has fluid buildup in her abdomen?" Derek assumed.

Meredith shook her head. "No, I think she's pregnant."

"What?"

"There's a mass under her abdomen. A mass with a head, and a back, and a butt. I can feel it," Meredith explained.

"She doesn't look pregnant at all," Derek said.

Meredith ran a hand through her hair and sighed. "Yeah, I know. Which is why I'm confused."

"I'll tell Mark to wait before he goes in. There's an ultrasound machine in room five."

"Thanks," Meredith said softly.

She wheeled the machine into Jenna's room and turned it on before addressing the girl. "I'm going to do an ultrasound. I need to check for…I just want to check to see what's going on inside."

"Okay," Jenna replied.

Meredith squirted the blue gel onto the girl's abdomen and spread it around with the wand. She swallowed hard when an image came over the screen, and she saw what she suspected. A baby, one that was already full term.

"Jenna," Meredith started.

"What the hell is that?" Jenna asked, looking to Meredith in disbelief. "Oh my God. No. No, there's no way…"

"Jenna," Meredith said quickly, in an attempt to calm the seventeen year old girl down.

"No. I can't be. I just had my period two weeks ago. You don't get your period when you're pregnant. This makes no sense," she said, tears filling her eyes as panic washed over her.

"Some women have spotting throughout their entire pregnancies that they mistake for their periods. It happens," Meredith explained.

Jenna continued to shake her head as tears slipped endlessly down her cheeks. "I... no, this is crazy. No."

"Okay. It's going to be okay," Meredith said comfortingly, taking Jenna's hand as it hung limp at her side. "I know this is scary, but I need you to try to stay calm. Those pains you've been having are contractions. The accident brought on labor. So you just need to stay relaxed, okay? I'm going to check the baby's heartbeat to make sure it's okay, and then I'm going to take you up to OB."

"I can't. No, I can't. This is…I didn't—I can't have a baby today," Jenna sobbed, gasping for air and squeezing onto Meredith's hand.

Meredith wracked her brain for what to do in this situation, but like Jenna, this was unfamiliar territory. Any pregnant woman she'd treated in the past knew she was pregnant well before she was already in labor about to become a mother.

"Alright, deep breaths. Just relax. Everything's fine. From what I can tell, the baby is healthy. And you're healthy, too. We'll just sew up your forehead, get you upstairs, and call your parents. We'll work everything out, okay?"

Jenna shook her head frantically. "No, I can't call my parents. They'll kill me. They still think I'm a virgin. How can I tell them they're going to be grandparents in a few hours? Besides, they live a thousand miles away. No. Can't do it," she insisted.

"Jenna, you're a minor. Legally, I have to contact them," Meredith said, her hand on Jenna's shoulder. "And I'm sure they'll just be relieved you're okay."

"No they won't," Jenna continued to cry. "Damn it."

"I know this is…a lot. I can't even imagine," Meredith said sympathetically. "But just because you didn't know, doesn't mean you can't handle this. You have options here. This isn't the end of the world. Everything will be okay. I'm here for you."

Jenna wiped her eyes with the tissue Meredith handed her and dropped her head into her hands. "Can you…call them? I don't know how to tell that to my parents."

"Sure," Meredith agreed, smoothing Jenna's hair with her fingers. It's what Derek did for her when she was upset, and she knew Jenna could use any comfort she could get.

...

Meredith put the phone back on the receiver and ran a hand through her hair. Telling parents their seventeen year old daughter was pregnant and in labor was almost as bad as telling the family their loved one didn't make it off the table alive.

Derek walked out of another trauma room after doing a consult for an accident victim, and walked over to his wife. "What's going on? Where's Jenna?"

"I took her up to OB. She's getting settled in," Meredith replied.

"So she's pregnant?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. In labor; two centimeters dilated. And her parents live in Chicago and probably won't be able to make it in until sometime tomorrow."

"How'd they take the news?" Derek asked.

"She's their pregnant seventeen year old kid. They're pissed," Meredith said regretfully, adjusting her scrub top over her belly.

"Sucks," Derek sighed. "So what're you gonna do?"

Meredith got up from the chair behind the desk and smiled at her husband. "I'm going to be there for her. She needs someone, so…"

Derek grinned at her. Meredith always stepped up to the plate when people needed her, whether she knew them or not. He admired that about her. "Okay. I have a surgery, but I'll come up later, see how things are going. Did Mark ever stitch her up?"

"He's up there now," Meredith nodded, grabbing Jenna's chart.

"Okay. Let me know if you need anything. Love you," Derek said, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek as his hand went to her belly.

Meredith put her hand on top of his and smiled at him. "Love you, too."

...

"Did you talk to them? Are they mad? Just tell me. I can take it," Jenna said, panting slightly as a contraction came over her.

Meredith quickly took hold of Jenna's hand and let her squeeze it as hard as she had to until the pain passed. Watching someone else in labor was making her nervous for the day when she would have to go through it, even if that day was still five months away. She patted Jenna's forehead with a damp cloth and smiled.

"They probably won't be able to make it out here until tomorrow because of the storm in Chicago. And they're not…thrilled, but they told me to tell you that they love you," Meredith admitted. "It's going to be okay."

"They'll tell me to give her away. Or him. I don't even know what it is," Jenna said, letting out a long breath as the contraction subsided.

"No one can make that decision for you, Jenna. Only you can make that decision," Meredith responded. "Would you like to know what you're having? I can check for you."

"Do you know what you're having?" Jenna asked, looking to Meredith's pregnant belly under her scrubs.

Meredith smiled. "A girl."

"How did I not know?" Jenna swallowed, wiping a tear from her eye. "I've had a baby living in me for nine months. And I had no idea. If that doesn't make you feel like the worst parent in the world, I don't know what will."

Meredith handed Jenna a tissue off her nightstand and pulled a chair over, taking a seat next to Jenna's bed. "No, it doesn't. If you had known, things would be different. But you didn't, and no one can fault you for that, Jenna," Meredith said. She paused, letting her hand fall to her belly.

"You know, my husband and I tried for five months for a baby. And when we saw that positive sign on the pregnancy test, and then saw her on the ultrasound for the first time, and found out she was a girl…it makes you realize how lucky you are. I know it doesn't feel like it, but this is blessing, Jenna."

"Yeah?"

"And I'm not saying you have to keep the baby. Or give the baby away. But I just want you to know that this day doesn't have to be the worst one of your life. It can be the best one, if you want it to be," Meredith said, thinking to the day when their daughter would be born. Even the thought made her heart beat faster in her chest.

"Can I see it? The baby, I mean. Can you tell me what it is?" Jenna asked.

"Sure," Meredith replied. She turned on the ultrasound machine and rubbed some gel over Jenna's abdomen with the wand, waiting for the baby's image to appear on the screen. She moved wand down to the baby's legs and tried to get an angle to sneak a peek between them. She saw what the sex was almost immediately and smiled. "Definitely a girl," she said.

A smile came over Jenna's face, too, as she stared at the screen. "Really?"

"Really," Meredith echoed.

"And she's okay?"

"She's perfect," Meredith reassured her. She printed out an ultrasound picture and handed it to Jenna. "Here you go."

"Thanks." Jenna stared at the photo and swallowed thickly. When she looked to Meredith, her eyes were glossed over with tears. "I don't know what to do."

"Just…wait. It's okay to think about it. And I'm here if you want to talk," Meredith offered. She wasn't really qualified in the psychiatric field, but it was the least she could do. There was no hurt in talking, something she learned not too long ago.

Jenna dropped her head back onto her pillows and turned her head toward Meredith. "What would you do?"

"You mean…with the baby?" she asked. Jenna nodded. "I don't know. I mean, when I was in college, sleeping around occasionally, depending on how crappy life was that week, I wondered sometimes what I'd do if I got pregnant. By the way, I'm not endorsing this," Meredith informed her. "Don't do it. Don't sleep around in college. That's my PSA."

Jenna laughed a little at Meredith's speech and waited for her to continue. "But you never got pregnant…"

"No, I didn't," Meredith said. "But I could have. The thing is, no one expects you to have to make decisions like this when you're seventeen. And if I were in your shoes, I don't know what I'd do. This whole thing was just sprung on you, and you have to make the hardest decision of your life, for you and for your baby."

"I already love her," Jenna confessed, placing her hand over her belly that didn't look at all like there was a baby inside.

"I don't want to influence you in one direction or the other. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, okay?" Meredith said supportively, patting the back of Jenna's hand. She felt her daughter's fluttering inside her belly and smiled to herself. If there was ever a time when she was thankful for the baby growing inside her, it was now.

...

While Jenna was taking a nap to build up her energy after getting an epidural, Meredith decided to sneak out of her room and go find Derek. He texted her and asked if she wanted to have lunch in his office after his surgery, and really, getting some alone time with her husband was all she wanted.

Meredith turned the knob to his office door and smiled when she saw him filling out paperwork at his desk. "Hey."

"Hey," Derek returned, pushing the paperwork aside. "You okay? How's Jenna doing?"

Meredith walked over to him and draped her white coat over the back of his chair, overtop of his. "She's sleeping. After she reached four centimeters, she got an epidural. I wanted her to rest up for when she'll have to start pushing in a few hours."

"Good," Derek nodded. He stood up and Meredith's arms wrapped around him almost immediately. Derek returned the hug, running his hands up and down her back. "What's this for?"

"I just…needed a hug or something," Meredith shrugged, letting herself unwind. The day was far from over, and she could really use this time to recharge.

"Always happy to do that," Derek said. "How's Blueberry?"

Meredith giggled. "She's good. I felt her moving around the whole way up here. I think she knows food is coming," she teased.

"Or maybe she knew Daddy was up here," Derek grinned.

"Maybe," Meredith played along. "So what did you get me?"

"Tuna salad, light on the mayo, with a side of pickles," he said as they walked over and sat down on the couch. "And some strawberries, just like you asked."

"Thank you," Meredith said, kicking off her shoes and resting her head on his shoulder.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "Everything okay? You seem…"

"Nothing, it's just…" Meredith let out a sigh and reached for her food off the table. "I feel bad for her. For Jenna. She's all alone."

"Not alone-alone," Derek pointed out. "You're there for her."

"It's not the same as having family though. She has no husband; her jerk of a boyfriend cheated on her. And her parents are across the country. She's got no one but me, a stranger she met a few hours ago."

"Yeah, but she has_ you_ for a doctor. You—who only met her a few hours ago—care about her, and treat her how you'd treat your own daughter," Derek said. "If her family can't be here, I'm sure she feels lucky that she has you."

Meredith swallowed a bite of her tuna salad and placed a comforting hand over her belly. "If anything, it makes me feel lucky I have you," she said, smiling at him. "When she's born, I know I'll have you."

"The whole time."

"Good," Meredith said softly.

"What's she having? Does she know?" he asked, twirling some noodles from his Styrofoam cup onto his fork.

"A girl," Meredith replied. "She doesn't know if she's keeping her yet, though. I guess she won't really know what to do until she's actually holding the baby in her arms. I don't think I could do it…give my baby away."

"I couldn't. I mean, I don't know what's it's like to carry a child, but…" Derek rested his hand over Meredith's belly and smiled slightly. "I'd give my life for our daughter in a heartbeat. From the minute we saw that plus sign on the pregnancy test, I was in love with her."

"Me too," Meredith whispered, leaning over and kissing her husband's cheek.

"But I guess it's different when you're seventeen…college student with your whole life ahead of you."

"…And didn't know you were pregnant until you're in labor," Meredith added, running her hand through her hair. "That sucks."

Derek sighed heavily. "Yeah it does."

Meredith grabbed her small container of strawberries, another of her recent food cravings, off the table and opened the lid. "Any other good surgeries planned for the day?"

"Spine tumor removal in an hour," Derek said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"God, I miss coffee," Meredith sighed when she got a whiff of the steam coming from Derek's cup. "Are you trying to make me jealous?" she giggled.

"Sorry," he laughed. "I know I'm breaking the rules, but I was desperate. That surgery is going to be long, and I need all the help I can get."

"That's okay. One of us should drink it," she said.

"Once we're both up all night with a newborn in a few months, I'll probably be doing espresso shots every fifteen minutes," Derek joked.

Meredith smiled at him amusedly as she bit into another strawberry. "And I'll be the one with our baby attached to my boob, drinking decaf tea and pretending it's espresso," she replied.

"If I could do it all for you…labor, birth, giving up caffeine…you know I would," Derek said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"You know, I…kind of love being pregnant. And after what happened to Jenna, I appreciate it more. The feeling of knowing that there's a baby in me. A baby we made, that depends on me for everything," Meredith said, her hand going to her belly like a magnet. "She's worth giving up caffeine for."

"God, I love you," Derek whispered, leaning in and kissing her.

"Love you," Meredith moaned against his lips as they picked up where they left off that morning, and her fingers flew to the drawstring of his pants. "Do we…can we?" she murmured halfheartedly.

"Yeah," he replied, kicking off his shoes. He leaned back on the couch and Meredith rolled on top of him, smiling when Derek snaked his hands up her shirt. "Door locked?"

Meredith nodded, trailing kisses along his neck while he started to pull her scrub top over her head. "Uh huh."

When she felt Derek's fingers slip into the waistband of her panties, she tipped her head back in pleasure. The constant sex drive was another perk of pregnancy. Any time of day, she was ready to go. "Mmm…" she hummed, running her fingers through his hair.

Both of their pagers sounded, breaking off their pending sex. Again. Meredith groaned as she grudgingly slipped off Derek's lap. "You've got to be freaking kidding me. Twice in one day," she ranted.

She grabbed their pagers off the table, and read them. Her stomach turned when she saw the message staring back at her. "Damn it."

"What?" Derek asked while readjusting his clothes that were in the process of being taken off.

"911 for Jenna."

"Why'd they page me?" he wondered aloud.

Meredith shrugged as she quickly pulled her scrub top back over her head, then grabbed both of their white coats. "Dunno," she said, tossing Derek his. "Damn it."

"It'll be okay," Derek tried to assure her. He opened his office door and they practically ran toward the elevator. While they waited for it to arrive, he took her hand and squeezed.

Meredith leaned into him and sighed. "Hope so."


	87. Appreciating Everything

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**I'm back at school now, which means less free time, but I'll do my best to update as often as I can. Thanks for being patient; I really appreciate it! :)**

When they made it back to Jenna's room, three nurses were already there by her bedside, pushing meds into her IV in an attempt to stop the seizures. "What happened?" Derek asked, quickly flipping through Jenna's chart to see if there was something they missed.

"She just started seizing," one of the nurses said, holding Jenna's head still as they rolled the girl onto her side.

"Alright, push one of Phenobarbital," Derek instructed.

Meredith grabbed his arm. "Derek, she's pregnant."

"I know. But if we don't stop the seizure, her heart could stop, and they'd both die," he said, nodding for the nurse to push the Phenobarbital down the IV tube. "We need to book an OR. Page anyone from OB to do an emergency c-section. I need to go in. I may have missed a bleed."

"Right away," the nurse responded as she exited the room and ran toward the nurses' station.

Jenna's seizure ended only a few seconds after she was given the medicine, and she inhaled a breath, her eyes blinking rapidly as she came to.

Meredith took Jenna's hand and squeezed it. "You're okay," she said. "You had a seizure. We need to take you into surgery to deliver the baby, and Dr. Shepherd is going to fix whatever is wrong, okay?"

"I can't… I have no one," Jenna said weakly, as Meredith placed the oxygen mask over her mouth.

"You have me. I'm here," Meredith said.

"But the baby…"

Meredith nodded reassuringly. "After she's born, I'll go. I'll make sure she's taken care of. I don't want you to worry about anything, okay."

"OR 4 is being prepped now," one of the nurses said upon reentering the room.

"Thank you," Derek replied, before turning his attention to Jenna. "We just need you to stay calm. We're gonna take good care of you. And the baby."

Jenna nodded, and took hold of Meredith's hand. "Okay."

Within minutes, Jenna was being put under anesthesia, and Meredith and Derek were quickly scrubbing in. She tied her mask on, and looked to him. "She never had an MRI or a CT. How do you know what to look for?"

"I don't know," Derek confessed. "After the baby's out, we can do a portable CT in the OR. She banged up her forehead. There might be a frontal lobe bleed."

"I would stay and help, but—" Meredith started.

"It's okay. You promised Jenna. After the surgery's over, I'll come find you," Derek said, pressing a kiss to her temple before tying on his own mask.

"Okay," Meredith said softly.

After entering the OR, Derek took his place by Jenna's head, ready to cut as soon as the baby was delivered. And Meredith walked to the middle of the gurney on the other side of Dr. Jensen to assist on the c-section.

"Any word on whether she's keeping the baby?" Dr. Jensen asked Meredith as she made the incision on Jenna's belly.

Meredith shook her head. "I don't know. I don't think she's decided yet. All I know is that she's having a girl."

"Baby looked pretty good on the ultrasound. Let's hope for the best, considering she had no prenatal care," Dr. Jensen said.

"Hope so," Meredith agreed, pulling back on the retractor.

Dr. Jensen carefully pulled the baby from Jenna's uterus, and handed her over to Meredith to be checked out. Derek watched as Meredith walked the newborn girl over to the warmer, remarking at how gentle she was with her. He let himself revel in this for only a moment or two, then turned his attention to Dr. Jensen. "No complications?"

"Looks like we're in the clear," Dr. Jensen replied, making sure there was no unnecessary bleeding. "She got really lucky considering everything she's been through."

Derek nodded, accepting the drill from the neuro fellow standing to his left. "She really did."

"How's the baby looking?" Dr. Jensen asked Meredith.

The baby's loud wailing cry filled the room, and they all breathed a collective sigh of relief. "She looks good. Definitely has healthy lungs," Meredith said, listening to her heartbeat. Strong and steady; Meredith smiled. "She's perfect."

"Good. When you get her to the NICU, make sure to run an APGAR on her," Dr. Jensen requested.

Meredith wrapped the baby up in a pink blanket and knit cap, making sure she was warm and protected from outside germs. "Okay," she replied.

As she passed by Derek on her way out of the OR, she saw his eyes crinkle as he gave her a smile beneath his mask. She smiled back at him. The baby was okay. They just needed Jenna to be okay, too.

…

Hours passed before the surgery ended, long tedious hours Derek spent repairing the bleed in Jenna's brain. As he walked down the OB floor toward the nursery, he stifled a yawn and ran his hands over his tired eyes. The six AM wakeup call and the afternoon spent in the OR had worn him out; he wanted more than anything to sneak away to an on-call room with Meredith and sleep.

He smiled when he pushed open the door to the nursery, spotting Meredith rocking the newborn infant in the rocking chair, her eyes closed in relaxation as the tiny baby slept in her arms. Derek pulled up a chair next to her and kissed her cheek.

"Hey," he said softly, as to not startle her or wake the baby.

Meredith's eyes opened and she immediately looked down at the baby, making sure she was okay. "Hey," she echoed. "How's Jenna?"

"She's gonna be fine," Derek said reassuringly. "I got the bleed. She should be awake soon."

"Good," Meredith whispered.

"How's she doing?" Derek asked.

"She's good. Her APGAR was normal; no jaundice; no infections," Meredith told him, stroking the baby's cheek with her finger.

"Good," he said. "Have you been here the whole time?" Derek asked with a chuckle, brushing some hair from her face.

She shook her head. "No. While the nurses were cleaning her up and getting her prints, I went down and got a sandwich. I needed to eat. So did Blueberry," Meredith giggled.

"Hmm…twenty weeks from now, we'll be in the nursery rocking Blueberry like you are right now," Derek grinned.

Meredith shifted the baby to her other arm and squeezed Derek's hand. "And hopefully a name other than Blueberry will be on her birth certificate…" she joked.

"We'll find the perfect name for her, don't worry," Derek promised. "She'll be beautiful, so we need a name that's up to par. It's out there. We just haven't found it yet."

"Okay," Meredith said, leaning over to kiss him. She softly pressed her lips to his and smiled. "Hmm… I needed that."

"A kiss?"

"Yes. I also need sex, but seeing as we've been interrupted twice already today, a kiss will have to do for now," Meredith giggled. The baby whimpered in her arms and she patted her back soothingly. "It's okay," she cooed. "Der, can you get that bottle? I think she might be hungry."

"Yeah." Derek reached over for the bottle sitting next to the baby's chart and handed it to Meredith. "Look at you. You're a natural," he complimented, watching as she easily fed the infant.

"Well, I try," Meredith teased. "Wanna hold her?"

Derek shook his head. "Nah, that's okay. She's comfy with you."

"Come on. You know you want to…" Meredith coaxed, a smile on her face. She held the baby out for him to take, and he reached for her, readjusting the bottle in her mouth and resettling in the chair.

Tears burned Meredith's eyes as she watched her husband, and before she could stop it from happening, one rolled down her cheek. "Damn," she laughed, wiping it away. "Sorry. I can't help it. Stupid hormones."

"Hmm… if you're crying now, just wait until I'm holding our daughter," Derek pointed out, smirking at her amusedly. Before getting pregnant, Meredith wasn't a crier. But now, even the littlest things set off the waterworks.

"Yeah. I'll be a crying puddle of goo on the floor," she said. "We have to make sure Cristina isn't around when you're holding her, or I'll never live it down."

"I think she'll be excited, too," Derek said. "No matter how much she pretends not to be."

"What? About the baby?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah. She comes off tough as nails, but one look at our daughter, and I guarantee, her sweet, girly side will break free," he chuckled.

"I'm not sure Cristina has a sweet, girly side," Meredith giggled, tucking the baby's pink cap over her ears. "But maybe you're right. I mean Mark of all people has one of our ultrasound pictures on his fridge…"

"Already a proud uncle," Derek replied.

"Well, obviously. Our daughter is awesome," Meredith boasted playfully. She looked to the baby in Derek's arms and smiled sadly. "She's pretty great too, isn't she?"

"Hmm," Derek hummed. "She is."

"Before today, no one knew she existed. Not the best way to start a life," she sighed, letting the baby squeeze her finger as she continued sucking down the bottle Derek was feeding her.

"She'll have a good life. Just because it started out this way doesn't mean she's doomed. Jenna seems like a smart kid. No matter what her decision is, she'll do what's best for her daughter."

Meredith's pager went off and she quickly removed it from her hip, silencing it before the other babies in the nursery were startled. "Jenna's awake," she said.

"Alright, I'll come with you. I need to do a post-op exam," Derek said, removing the empty bottle from the baby's mouth and handing it to Meredith. He got up from the chair and gently placed her in her bassinet, re-swaddling her loosened blanket. "All set."

"You're a good swaddler," Meredith complimented, signing the baby out on the time chart. "You're gonna have to teach me how to do that."

Derek laughed. "Lots of practice with the nieces and nephews. I'll give you lessons," he joked as they walked out of the nursery toward Jenna's room, rolling the bassinet in front of them.

"Thanks," she smiled, leaning into him.

They reached Jenna's room moments later and wheeled the baby in, following right after. "Hi," Meredith greeted. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired," Jenna said, her eyes never leaving the bassinet that held her daughter. "I, um…" she hesitated. "Is she okay?"

"She's perfect," Meredith said with a reassuring smile. "No complications. She just had a bottle, actually."

Derek shined the penlight into her eyes and nodded, completing the routine neuro checks. After examining the incision site of her skull, he scribbled some brief notes down in Jenna's chart and flipped it closed. "You're looking great. I'll come to check on you in a little while, okay?" he said kindly.

"Okay; thanks," Jenna said softly.

On his way out of the room, Derek subtly gave Meredith's hand a gentle squeeze and she smiled at him. "See you later," he whispered, figuring that it would be easier for Jenna to talk to Meredith without him in the room… motherly bonding or whatever.

After Derek exited and the door clicked shut behind him, Meredith turned toward Jenna. "Would you like to hold her?"

"I…yeah, I guess," Jenna said, swallowing hard as she watched Meredith pick the baby up and walk her over to the bed.

"Here you go," Meredith said as she gently placed the baby in Jenna's arms. "It's okay; she won't break."

Jenna cradled the baby into her chest and sniffled as tears pooled in her eyes. "Wow."

Meredith pulled over a chair and sat down next to Jenna's bed, one hand resting over her belly. She felt the tiny ripples going on inside her, a sign that her daughter was busy moving around; Meredith smiled. After today, she'd never take that feeling for granted.

"She weighs seven pounds, three ounces," Meredith informed her. "Twenty inches long. Came out crying. She's completely healthy."

"She looks like me," Jenna said as a tear slipped down her cheek and splashed on the baby's blanket.

Meredith handed her a tissue. "She's beautiful."

"When do I… I mean, if I decided not to keep her, how long would I… would she be here?" Jenna asked.

"Well, that depends. Social Services would come talk to you, walk you through it. They would try to find a family for her as soon as they could," Meredith said before pausing. "Jenna, don't think that you have to give her away. I know you said your parents are going to make you do that, but they can't make you do anything. This is your decision. And either way, I'll help you as much as I can."

Jenna turned to Meredith and smiled. "Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Because it's what I'd do if you were my daughter," Meredith said with a simple shrug, her hand still over her belly. "I know what it's like to feel like you have no one. And that sucks. And I don't want you to feel that way."

"You're gonna be a good mom," Jenna complimented her, wiping away the wetness on her cheeks.

"You could be, too," Meredith responded. She leaned back in the chair and tapped her fingers against her belly. "Want to know something?"

"Hmm?"

"Before I met my husband, I didn't want kids. I had a crappy childhood, and just turned myself off to the idea. No kids; no way," Meredith emphasized. "And then one day, I met this guy. Fast forward to now, we're having a baby together, and I've never been happier." She paused, running a hand through her hair. "But I also know what it's like to be seventeen. College… this whole plan for your life. And with a baby, those plans have to change, or be put on hold. What I'm saying is that whether or not you're the one to raise her, you'll always be her mother. And you'll do what's best for her."

More tears slipped from Jenna's eyes onto her cheeks and she nodded. "I can't do it. I can't keep her. I want her to have everything, and I love her enough to know that I can't do that."

Meredith brushed some hair from Jenna's face and nodded sympathetically. "Okay; It's okay," she said quickly, her eyes scanning the monitors to check for spikes in her blood pressure. Jenna was still post-op from brain surgery, and that wasn't far from Meredith's mind. "Listen, you don't have to make this decision now. You have time."

Jenna wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and looked down at the baby girl sleeping in her arms. "No, I… from the second I saw her on that ultrasound, I knew. I guess I just had to meet her first. To make sure I was doing the right thing. I'm giving her away _because_ I love her."

Meredith felt the tears sting her own eyes, and she tried to swallow them away. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," Jenna echoed, her voice cracking as she spoke. "I know it's the right thing."

"Okay," Meredith whispered, rolling her watch around her wrist as she contemplated what to say next. Again, this territory was as unfamiliar to Jenna as it was to Meredith. "Well, I um… do you want me to call down Social Services? If you wanted to spend some time with her, that's fine too.

"No, you should call them. The longer she's with me, the harder it'll be to let her go," Jenna said decidedly.

"And you're sure?" Meredith asked. "You don't want to talk to your family first?"

Jenna shook her head. "No. This is my decision. I don't want them to think they made it for me. She's my daughter; not theirs."

"Okay," Meredith replied, unsure of whether she was more proud or stunned. Actually a lot of both. "I'll be right back." She stood up from her chair and walked toward the door, waiting until she had one foot planted in the hallway before letting a tear slip from her eye.

"Meredith?" Jenna called out.

She quickly wiped the tear off her face and turned around, a small smile on her face. "Hmm?"

"Thank you."

"For what?" Meredith asked, her eyebrows knitted in confusion.

More tears spilled onto Jenna's cheeks and she managed a small, pained smile, the gravity of what she was doing washing over her. "I just… your daughter is lucky, that's all. She's lucky to have you as a mom."

Meredith's hand subconsciously traveled to her belly and she nodded. "So is your daughter."

…

By the time she walked in the front door of their home, it felt like days had passed since she'd last been there. Days at work were always exhausting regardless, but being pregnant and working on an emotionally draining case made today even more challenging.

"Hey," Derek said, walking into the living room. Meredith smiled at him. He was the only person she wanted to be with after the day she'd had.

"Hey," Meredith echoed, shimmying off her coat and putting it on a hook in the foyer. She kicked off her shoes, then wrapped her arms around him. "Hmm… I'm glad you're here."

"Why wouldn't I be?" Derek asked as he rubbed her back with his hands, something she loved, but was getting harder to do with her growing belly between them.

Meredith shrugged. "With the MVCs today, I thought you might have gotten pulled into a surgery or something. I haven't seen you since you left Jenna's room," she yawned.

Derek took her hand and walked with her toward the kitchen where he had food waiting. "There was a minor subarachnoid bleed I was going to take care of, but I asked Nelson to do it. I just wanted to come home."

"Thank you," Meredith whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Hungry?" Derek asked, turning down the flame under the pot on the stove. "I made spaghetti. And there's some chicken heating up in the oven."

"This is why I married you," Meredith sighed amusedly. She hopped up onto a stool and placed her hand over her belly. "So, uh…" She swallowed. "Jenna is giving the baby away."

"Really?" Derek asked in surprise.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah."

"I really thought she was going to keep her," Derek said. "It's rare that teen mothers opt for adoption. Good for her, I guess," he said supportively.

"Yeah. It's good. Hard, but good," Meredith agreed, blinking back a new round of tears that sprang to her eyes. Pregnancy was wonderful, yes, but she could live without the unexpected, uncontrollable crying fits. "I could never be a therapist. It's exhausting."

"What do you mean?" he asked, scooping spaghetti onto both of their plates.

"Just today. I don't know. They tell you not to get involved, but how can I not?" she pointed out. "When I called Jenna's parents, the first thing her mom said was 'I'm so disappointed in her.' She didn't ask how she was doing. I mean, she was in a car accident. She could've been killed. But no. The first thing her mother says is _that_. And I know that they're just in shock over the whole thing. But I could never…that's not the kind of parent I want to be."

"You won't be," Derek said, walking over to the other side of the island holding their plates, handing one to her. "I can guarantee that."

Meredith wiped under her eyes with a napkin and sighed. "I love our daughter so much. She's only the size of a mango, and I'm completely in love with her. And you are, too. No matter what she does, that's never going to change. Obviously, I wouldn't want her getting pregnant at seventeen…"

"…Which will never happen," Derek said. "I'll fasten a chastity belt around her waist if I have to," he chuckled.

"You're so going to be the dad that intimidates every single boy that walks in the door," Meredith laughed, twirling some spaghetti on her fork.

"Damn right I am," he teased. "She's only allowed to date smart kids like her… mathletes or band geeks. The kind of guy I was in high school. No Mark Sloans."

"Okay," Meredith appeased him, trying not to laugh. Their mango-sized daughter wouldn't show any interest in boys for many, many years, but still, the fact that Derek was already a doting dad made her proud. "Anyway, I'm just saying that no matter what she does, I could never be cold like that." She paused. "I will not turn into my mother."

Derek took her hand in his and squeezed it. "Just because you're her daughter doesn't mean you'll turn into her. Mer, you spent the entire day with Jenna. Today, you were like her mom. You helped her make the most important decision of her life. Would Ellis Grey have done that? No. But you did. And that's what makes you different."

Meredith smiled a little. "Thank you," she whispered. He always knew the right thing to say, something she really appreciated about him.

"We're in our daughter's corner forever, Meredith. No matter what happens. We're a family," he said, wrapping his arm around her and kissing her temple.

She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. Family was something she never had before she met Derek. Of course she loved Cristina and her other friends too, but it wasn't the same as with Derek. With him, there was a pull she'd never felt before. And since finding out about their daughter, it had only grown stronger.

"If I wasn't so tired, you'd be getting sex for that," Meredith said.

"We got interrupted twice today. Chances are we'd just get interrupted again," he joked.

"Probably," she giggled. "There's always tomorrow—which is good, because we need to get in all the sex we can before she's born. Once she's here, the only screaming going on in the middle of the night will be coming from the bassinet in our room…"

"Is it strange that I'm excited for that?"

"Hmm… if it does, then I'm weird, too," she replied, taking another bite of her pasta.

"We can be weird together then," Derek chuckled.

Meredith smiled at her husband. "Okay."


	88. Wining, Dining and Kicking

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**I really appreciate your patience. I'm banking as many updates as I can, but with school taking up all my free time, it's hard to find time to write. But I'm doing my best! Anyway, enjoy! :)  
**

Meredith stood in her bra and panties and looked herself over in their bedroom mirror. Anyone who didn't know she was pregnant a few weeks ago definitely knew now. Her once tiny bump was ever-evolving into more than just a bump. She was twenty-four weeks pregnant today, and as luck would have it, the date was February fourteenth. Valentine's Day. And because she was married to Derek Shepherd, celebrating the holiday was practically mandatory. But she didn't mind; this Valentine's Day would be their last one with just the two of them, so Meredith decided to give in and let Derek wine and dine her.

She took her tub of cocoa butter off her dresser and rubbed some into her palms, smoothing it onto her growing belly. Her cell phone rang and she quickly retrieved it from her nightstand. "Hello?" Meredith said, tucking it under her chin while she continued to massage the cocoa butter into her skin.

"Hey," came Cristina's voice from the other end.

"Hey. What's up?" Meredith asked. She wiped her hands on the bath towel still lying on the bed and opened her closet door, biting her lip in search of what to wear.

"Do you have any idea where we're going?" Cristina asked, clearly exasperated that she was being dragged out to celebrate the holiday she hated.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know. Derek just said that he and Owen made reservations. That's all I could get out of him."

"That's it?"

"Hey, I even bribed him with sex. And that's still all I got," Meredith said, frowning when she saw a slinky black dress that would have fit her a few months ago hanging in her closet. But now that her belly was growing into a basketball, there was no chance.

"Hmm…" Cristina groaned. "This sucks."

"It won't be that bad. It's actually kind of… sweet that they want to take us somewhere," Meredith said.

"…Says the pregnant girl married to McDreamy," Cristina replied teasingly.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Exactly. This is our last Valentine's Day before the baby is born, so I'm letting my husband take me out to dinner and then sex me all night long. Carpe diem or whatever," she pointed out.

"Carpe diem…" Cristina echoed. "Okay then."

"Stop mocking me and get ready. After Derek gets out of the shower and gets dressed, we're coming to pick you up," Meredith told her friend as she continued to rummage through her closet.

"You suck," Cristina sighed. "See you later."

Meredith smiled. "Yep. Love you too." She tossed her cell phone on the bed and ran a hand through her hair. "What am I going to wear?" she asked her belly. "Any ideas?"

The door to their bathroom opened and Derek emerged, a towel loosely wrapped around his waist. Meredith bit her lip, trying to control the urge to pin him down on the bed and have her way with him.

"Still not dressed yet?" Derek asked with a smirk, his eyes trailing over her body still only clad in her bra and panties.

"I don't know what to wear. And until I go back to the maternity store, my choices are getting more and more limited…" she said, trying not to get all hot and bothered as Derek tossed his towel into the hamper and put on his boxers. Naked Derek turned her on more and more these days.

"Check the back of the door," Derek said, cocking his head toward their opened bedroom door.

"Why? The only thing on there is your suit," Meredith replied.

Derek raised his eyebrows amusedly. "Is it?" he asked nonchalantly, rolling some deodorant under his arms.

Meredith eyed her husband suspiciously and walked over to the door. She moved his suit out of the way, smiling when she saw what was behind it. "You bought me a dress?" she asked, her eyes wide with excitement.

"I did. I asked Izzie and Cristina's for their opinions first, then I went out and got it. Like it?" Derek asked.

"Derek." She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him as best she could, her growing belly pressing into the bare skin of his stomach. "Thank you," Meredith whispered, pressing her lips to his.

"You're welcome," Derek said with a smile. "At first, I was going to go with black, but I thought the navy one would be better. I figured it would look nice, you know, with your eyes."

"This is perfect," she said, pulling the knee length, scoop neck dress from the hanger. No matter how much her belly grew, she still felt sexy, thanks mostly to her husband. Meredith knew that even when she was in labor, he would still make her feel beautiful.

Derek buttoned up his light blue dress shirt and flashed her a grin. "That's what I was hoping you'd say."

"Any chance you can tell me where we're going?" she asked coyly, seeing how much she could get out of him. "If you tell me, then I might just be able to put what I learned in my Cosmo to good use… you know, the issue with the words "50 Sex Positions Guaranteed to Have Your Man Begging for More" written on the cover…"

"Oh yeah?"

"Mmhmm," Meredith hummed, walking over to him and turning around.

Derek tied the back of her dress and she spun around to face him. She was beautiful, so glowy and pregnant that his breath caught in his throat. Meredith still had a little over three months to go, and he knew that she'd only grow more gorgeous with each passing week.

"God, you look amazing," he said softly, running his hands down her bare arms.

"Well, like I said, I'll let you take this dress off of me with your teeth the second we're home tonight if you tell me what you have planned," Meredith bribed, smoothing out his wet hair with her fingers. She pressed her cheek to his and licked her lips. "There's even a few pregnancy positions in there… about ways I could ride you that'll make you scream…"

"Hmm…" Derek moaned, swallowing thickly at the images whirling around in his mind. "Coselli's," he confessed.

"Coselli's? How the hell did you get a reservation at Coselli's?" she asked.

Derek smiled. "I operated on Mrs. Coselli a few years back. Saving the owner's wife has its perks," he winked.

"Apparently," Meredith giggled. She walked over to her bureau and began putting on her usual light makeup, a smile on her face. "You're definitely getting sex for this."

"You're gonna have to show me this Cosmo," Derek told her, sitting down on the bed to put on his shoes.

"Oh, I plan on it," Meredith said, rolling some lip gloss on her lips. "Besides, you look pretty sexy right now. Even if we were going to McDonald's, you'd be getting laid tonight."

"Well, we should get going then. The sooner we go out, the sooner we come home," Derek pointed out.

Meredith took her heels from her closet and set them at her feet. "Come here. I need to use you for balance. I'm having center of gravity issues lately…" she sighed, holding onto Derek's arm as she slipped her heels on.

"Center of gravity issues?" Derek asked.

"The bigger she gets, the less steady I am," Meredith explained, recalling what she read in one of her pregnancy books.

"She's definitely growing," Derek grinned, proud of his daughter's accomplishments, even though she was only a foot long and still living in his wife's uterus.

"Hmm… we need to stop saying 'she' and find her a name soon," Meredith told him as she smoothed out the shoulders of his suit jacket, making sure he looked his best.

"We'll find one, I promise," he said, kissing her cheek. "Next weekend… you, me, and the baby name book."

"Izzie asked if we could go over next Saturday so you could help Alex do… man stuff. Lifting boxes or something. I don't know. I said yes once she told me there would be cake involved," Meredith explained.

"Afterward then," Derek said.

He wrapped his arms around her and she leaned into him. "Hmm…" Meredith hummed, breathing him in. "Sounds good."

"Ready?"

She nodded, lacing her fingers through his. "Yeah, let's go."

…

"I can't believe we're doing this," Cristina groaned from the backseat of Meredith and Derek's car, gazing out the window like she was kidnapped inside.

"It's Valentine's Day," Derek and Owen said in unison.

"We don't do Valentine's Day," Meredith reminded them. "Well, I guess I do… a little bit. But it's not my fault. Pregnancy hormones make me sappy."

"It's romantic," Derek said, looking over at Meredith and smiling at her.

She rolled her eyes amusedly. "No it isn't," she said. "I mean, fine, it's nice. But it's not nearly as nice as a night in with sex on the couch. Low frills."

"I'm with her," Cristina agreed, slinking back into her seat and crossing her arms over her chest.

Derek reached for Meredith's hand and rubbed his thumb over the back of it. "All the sex you want later on tonight," he grinned.

"Oh God, please stop talking," Cristina groaned. "Thinking of you two doing it on the couch is more than I can handle."

Owen laughed. "You know, all we wanted to do was take you ladies out for a fun night. Secret location, good food—"

"They're taking us to Coselli's," Meredith blurted, figuring that if Cristina found out afterward that she knew about it, she would have to suffer her friend's wrath. Neither of them particularly liked surprises, especially when Cristina likened a night out to handing over her free will.

"You told her?" Owen asked Derek in shock.

"Blame Mer. She bribed me with new sex positions from her Cosmo," Derek said in his defense, switching lanes to he could turn into the restaurant parking lot.

"Oh, _that_ Cosmo," Cristina recalled. "The purple one with that supermodel on it?"

"That's the one," Meredith said happily. "I told Derek that if he confessed, we could do the pregnancy ones. Three seconds later, he caved."

Derek maneuvered the car into a parking spot then cut the engine. "Of course I caved. Who wouldn't?"

Meredith laughed, opening her car door and stepping out. "Whoa," she said, grabbing hold of Owen's arm to steady herself in her shoes.

"You okay?" Cristina asked as she and Derek walked around to the other side of the car.

Derek looped his arm through Meredith's and kissed her temple. "Center of gravity being a pain in the ass again?" he chuckled.

"Haha," Meredith said wryly. "You try walking in a new pair of heels with a baby growing inside you. It's not easy."

"Why'd you wear heels?" Cristina questioned as the four of them entered the restaurant.

"Because I bought them a while ago, and this was my first chance to wear them. Plus, they look good with this dress Derek got me," Meredith shrugged, resting one hand on her belly.

"Wow," Cristina said in awe, her eyes gaping at the bump under Meredith's dress.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"Nothing. It's just… usually you're in scrubs. I never noticed how big you were," Cristina explained.

Derek waved over to the two of them. "Table's ready," he said as he and Owen waited for them before following the hostess.

"Um… thank you?" Meredith asked, wondering if that was Cristina's way of offering an offhand compliment.

"I'm not making fun. I'm just… there's really a little person in there," Cristina said, smiling slightly at her friend. No matter how blasé Cristina pretended to be about the whole thing, Meredith knew that once her daughter was born, Cristina, too, would be excited.

"Yes there is," Derek grinned, pulling back Meredith's chair for her. "Twenty-four weeks today."

"No kidding?" Owen asked as he sat down next to Cristina on the other side of their table. "Only… sixteen weeks to go now."

"And so much to do still," Meredith said. "Nursery, furniture, name…"

"The other day, I overheard Stevens ordering baby-themed party favors out of a catalog. So at least you know the baby shower is taken care of," Owen joked as he opened his menu.

Meredith laughed. "I think she's more prepared than we are."

"Any more names picked out yet?" Cristina asked.

"A few," Derek shrugged. "Apparently, we're picky name choosers."

"Well, it's her name. It's a big decision. I want to make sure we pick the right one," Meredith said, her stomach growling as she read over the menu.

Italian food was her favorite, and tonight, she didn't care about carbs and calories. And when a basket of bread sticks was placed on their table, any trace of guilt she had was discarded. Before the waiter could introduce himself, she was already biting into one. "Oh my God," she moaned. "Forget everything I said in the car. This cheesy Valentine's Day restaurant thing is fine with me."

And once their entrées arrived, Meredith vowed that any time Derek wanted to wine and dine her at a fancy restaurant, she'd let him. Derek watched as she twirled some fettuccine alfredo onto her fork and he smiled.

"Our daughter likes Italian food?" Derek assumed, biting into a piece of his marsala.

"Yes, she does, which is good. If she didn't, I'd be very sad," Meredith teased, thankful that the nausea she'd had early on in her pregnancy had passed. There were days when certain foods made her queasy. But for the most part, she could eat anything and everything she wanted.

"So twenty-four weeks? How big is she now?" Owen asked conversationally as he popped a piece of chicken into his mouth.

"The baby? She's uh… almost a foot long now," Meredith said, smiling. "I can definitely feel her. No major kicks yet, but sometimes I know when she's moving around. She does it very gently," she giggled, her hand gravitating toward her belly.

"That's creepy," Cristina said, taking a sip of her wine.

"It's not creepy," Meredith countered, rolling her eyes. "It's amazing. And guess what? She has hair. And eyelashes. And eyebrows. Oh, fingernails too."

"She's the size of a… what was it? Papaya?" Derek said, looking over to Meredith for confirmation.

Meredith nodded. "That's what the book said. But she feels bigger than that. If I still have sixteen weeks to go, I can't even imagine what this will look like on my due date," she laughed, pointing to her burgeoning bump.

"Is the entire Shepherd clan flying out for that event?" Cristina asked.

"Uh, I hope not," Derek chuckled, smiling when Meredith stole a piece of shrimp off his dish. Since they met, she'd always been very 'family style' with his food, but since getting pregnant, it was becoming a daily occurrence, something he found adorable.

"Big family, Derek?" Owen asked.

"That's an understatement," Meredith answered humorously. "Our daughter will be the… sixteenth grandchild; tenth niece."

"Oh wow," Owen replied. "Impressive. Are you two the last ones to add your own to the mix?"

Meredith smiled. "We are. And because Derek is the only son…"

Owen nodded in understanding. "Aah, chaos."

"My mom mails us clip-outs of nurseries from catalogs. And yesterday, my sister Liz called me at work with a list of names that she and my other sisters like. Subtlety really isn't their thing," Derek chuckled. "That's why Mark and I are like brothers. I needed an escape from all the estrogen."

"Has he set a wedding date yet?" Cristina asked.

Derek quickly shook his head 'no' in hopes that Meredith wouldn't see, but it was too late. "What?" she asked her husband. "Did he?"

Derek sighed. Mark told him the wedding date yesterday in passing, but Derek was hoping to keep it from Meredith until the formal invitation arrived in the mail. "Yeah. They did…"

"Well?" Meredith asked.

"May 22," Derek confessed, bracing himself for what Meredith might say.

Cristina pursed her lips together, but managed to laugh anyway. "Sorry," she told Meredith apologetically when she shot her an angry look. "It's just funny."

"Oh, yeah," Meredith agreed sarcastically, an amused smirk on her face. "Leave it to him to get married when I'm nine months pregnant. Exactly seven days before my due date."

"That's the only day the church had an opening. Apparently, Bridget wanted to do it in April, but everything was booked up. May 22 was the only free Saturday they had until July," Derek explained, recalling what Mark told him.

"Well, it'll probably be our last outing before she's born. So even if I'm waddling and huge, we may as well make the most of it," Meredith shrugged.

"What if your water breaks during the ceremony?" Cristina asked.

"Well then, I guess we're not making it to the reception," Derek said, winking over at Meredith as she bit into her breadstick.

She placed her hand over her belly and smiled at her husband. "Guess not."

Cristina sighed audibly and shook her head. "You two should be on Hallmark cards," she said.

"Oh, stop. They're happy," Owen said in their defense.

"Just wait until you're knocked up one day. The warm, gooey hormones are uncontrollable," Meredith warned her.

"Are you kidding me? I don't want kids," Cristina laughed. "But I promise I'll be the best damn godmother ever."

"Babysitting?" Derek asked.

Cristina contemplated for a moment before speaking. "When she's potty trained—unless Owen volunteers to change diapers for me."

"You couldn't handle a diaper?" Owen asked, chuckling.

"I could. I just choose not to," Cristina decided as she chewed. "Will you two even need babysitters? We're going to have to drag you away from her."

Neither Derek nor Meredith could deny that, however much they wanted to counter Cristina's claim. A night in with their daughter would trump everything else.

"True. But if we can be convinced to go on a date night here and there, you'll be the one we call… if for some reason Izzie can't," Meredith added. "She already called dibs on babysitting first." She turned to Derek and smiled. "By the way, she also decided that she and Alex are the godparents for the next baby."

"She called dibs on that, too?" Cristina asked, not that she was really surprised that Izzie would do such a thing.

"It's Izzie. Of course she did," Meredith giggled.

"Guess that means you have to have a second kid no matter what then," Owen pointed out.

Derek laughed. "Well, lucky for her, we want two kids anyway," he said, leaning down and picking up Meredith's napkin when it fell to the floor.

"Thank you," Meredith said softly, taking his hand under the table and squeezing it gently.

The gesture didn't go unnoticed by Cristina and she sighed as she bit into her garlic bread. "Like I said: Hallmark Card."

…

It was nearing ten o'clock when they finally made it back home, and even though she was getting tired and her feet were starting to hurt from wearing heels, Meredith was determined to keep up their Valentine's Day tradition of sex.

She tossed her shoes into her closet and smiled at him. "Sex time."

"Finally," Derek chuckled as he leaned in and kissed her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Hmm, yeah," Meredith murmured against his lips. "Finally."

Just as Derek reached around to untie the back of her dress, Meredith gasped, her hands flying to her belly. "Holy crap!"

"What?" he asked in a panic. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"She's kicking! Like, really kicking!" Meredith exclaimed as she took his hand and placed it a little below her rib cage. "Do you feel that?"

Derek's breath caught in his throat when he felt the tiny thumps of his daughter's feet inside Meredith's belly. "Oh my God," he whispered.

"I've felt her move before but not like this," Meredith said in awe, her hand right next to Derek's.

"She must be running out of room in there," Derek chuckled. He felt another kick and nearly jumped in surprise. "Wow, she's got powerful little legs."

"She still has sixteen weeks worth of growing to do. I hope she's able to make herself comfy," Meredith giggled.

Derek threaded his fingers through her hair and kissed her, languidly pressing his lips to hers over and over. "Our daughter is awesome," he whispered, trailing one hand down her back and around to her belly again.

Meredith smiled, and tears gathered in her eyes. "She really is."

"I love her so much," Derek said softly, resting his forehead against hers. "And you."

"We love you, too," Meredith replied as her fingers began working on the buttons of his shirt, nimbly undoing each one.

"What're you doing?" Derek asked.

"Undressing you so we can have sex," she said simply.

"But she's… what if…" Derek sputtered, his hand still planted on her bump.

"What if what?" Meredith looked to him, a confused expression on her face. Derek had never been hesitant when it came to sex before, so she couldn't help but be baffled.

Derek shrugged. "You know… what if she does that while we're…"

"Having sex?" Meredith finished for him.

"Yeah."

"It's happened before," she said, gently easing her husband back onto their bed after she finally succeeded in removing his shirt. "It's okay."

"Wait, you've felt her moving while we were actually… doing it?" he asked.

"Why do you sound so freaked out? It's sex. Don't forget, sex is what made her," Meredith reminded him, finding his reaction highly amusing.

"I know, but still," he upheld. "What if she knows we're about to, and that's why she's…"

Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed. "Warning you?" she guessed. "You do know female anatomy, right? Derek, seriously. My hormones are on overdrive. I need sex, and I need it now. I need _you_."

"Okay," Derek chuckled, finally giving in and untying the back of her dress. "But if she kicks again, tell me so I can… evacuate," he requested.

"Did you really just say evacuate?" Meredith teased him. She reached around and unhooked her bra, freeing her fuller breasts. When she saw that his eyes were instantly drawn to them, Meredith smiled. "Still want to keep worrying, or do you want to have sex?"

Derek quickly pulled both his pants and boxers off, then hooked his fingers through her panties, trailing them down her long legs. "I wanna have sex," he grinned, chuckling when Meredith gently pushed him back into the pillows.

"Me too," she said. "And I'm on top."

"Fine with me," Derek said, his breath hitching in his throat when she ran her fingers over his groin.

"Hmm… I thought so," Meredith whispered as she settled herself on top of him, rolling her hips in figure eights. She leaned down and kissed him. "I love you."

He smiled at his wife, beautifully pregnant and glowy. "I love you, too."

"Last Valentine's Day before we have a baby," Meredith said.

Derek ran his hands over her smooth thighs and moved them up to her hips, their daughter housed safely between them. "Then let's make tonight count."


	89. Finally Choosing a Name

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. I just wish I did.**

**Once again, I apologize for the wait between chapters. This is by far the most butt-kicking semester I've ever had, and I barely have time to do anything these days. Sigh. I'm doing my best though. And as always, thanks for being patient.  
**

"Hey," Derek said as he entered the kitchen in an old tee shirt and a pair of jeans, the kind of outfit one wears to do unglamorous things, what Meredith instructed him to wear.

Meredith put a spoonful of peanut butter into her mouth and smiled. "Hey."

"So what exactly are we doing today?" he asked.

"I'm sitting on the couch and eating whatever baked good Izzie has to offer me, and you're helping Alex organize the attic," she told him. "Pass me the Oreos please?"

Derek slid the blue bag across the counter and watched her pull one out, then spread peanut butter over the top of the cookie. "That's gross," he chuckled.

"Actually, it's delicious," Meredith countered, putting it in her mouth. "Don't bash it until you try it."

"Fine, I take it back," he said amusedly.

Meredith reached up into the cabinet for a glass and Derek's eyes were drawn to her belly, twenty-five weeks pregnant now with their daughter. "Mer, you popped!" he all but exclaimed.

She looked at him confusedly as she pulled the milk from the fridge. "What?"

"Your belly button popped," Derek grinned.

"What?" Meredith glanced down at her belly, and saw for the first time her now protruding belly button visible under her snug white shirt. "Holy crap."

"You didn't notice this morning?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, otherwise I wouldn't have worn this shirt…"

"What? Don't hide it. It's adorable," Derek chuckled as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Derek," Meredith giggled, pointing down to the tiny protuberance of her belly button pressing firmly against her shirt. "This is not attractive."

Derek leaned in and kissed her. "Hmm… I think it is."

"You'll still want sex with me, even with the popped belly button?" she asked.

"Your body is beautiful. Everything about it. And the belly button," he said, splaying his hand over her abdomen. "She's definitely growing."

"We need to stop saying 'she' and decide on a name," Meredith pointed out. "Otherwise, we'll have to just go with Blueberry."

Derek smiled. "Well, she'd be the only Blueberry in her class," he teased. "Don't worry, we'll find it."

"Izzie's really grilling me lately. She wants to embroider her name on a receiving blanket, and every time I tell her that we haven't picked a name yet, she looks at me like I'm committing a crime," Meredith said.

"Picking a name is harder than I thought it would be. There's tons of names out there," Derek replied, trying not to laugh as he watched Meredith pack a dozen or so Oreos in a Ziploc bag. She'd been craving Oreos for a week now, and at the rate she was consuming them, they'd need more by tomorrow.

"What about…" Meredith pondered for a moment. "Brooke?"

"Not my favorite," Derek said. "Madeline?"

Meredith scrunched her nose. "Reminds me of the book about the little, French orphan girl."

"Actually, she was in boarding school," Derek corrected.

"Orphanage, boarding school, whatever. Still a no."

"Fine. What about… Alexis?" Derek suggested.

"We already have a Lexie in the family," Meredith reminded him, taking one last scoop of peanut butter before putting it back in the cabinet. "Oh, what about Natalie? I've always loved that name."

Derek shrugged noncommittally. "It's okay."

Meredith looked down at her belly and sighed. "Don't worry. We'll have one by the time you're born," she said. "And hopefully that day, my belly button will return to normal, too."

"It will," Derek chuckled, resting his hand on the small of her back. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah," Meredith smiled. "Let's go."

…

Meredith shook her foot back and forth as they drove toward her old house, looking out the window for a suitable place to stop so she could pee. When she spotted a coffee shop coming up on the right, she gently tapped Derek's shoulder.

"Pull in," she told him.

Derek quickly switched lanes and made a right into the parking lot. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm going to pee myself. She's bouncing on my bladder or something," Meredith said.

"Okay," Derek nodded, trying not to laugh. These days, his wife was peeing nonstop, even having to scrub out of long surgeries every few hours to empty her bladder. And he knew that in the coming weeks, it would only get worse.

"Don't laugh at me," Meredith warned. "I woke up with an extreme outie belly button this morning. And my boobs are sore because they're growing so much. And our daughter is using my bladder as a trampoline. When you can top that, you can tease me," she couldn't help but giggle.

"But you're laughing," Derek pointed out as they unfastened their seatbelts. He walked around to the other side of the car and took Meredith's hand. Normally, she refused to let him open doors for her, but since getting pregnant, the chivalrous side of him was hard to get rid of.

"Irrelevant."

"Okay," Derek conceded. "Sorry." He opened the door to the coffee shop and Meredith walked in ahead of him, searching for the bathroom. "Want anything?" he asked.

Before walking toward the bathroom, Meredith studied the menu board, biting her lip in contemplation. "Yes," she said. "Uh… a hot chocolate. Oh, get some donuts, too. We can take them over to Alex and Iz's."

"Do you want a strawberry frosted with the sprinkles?" he asked.

Meredith smiled at how well he knew her. "Yes, please."

"Got it," Derek grinned, pulling his wallet from his pocket.

"Thank you," Meredith replied as she walked to the bathroom.

After paying the cashier and receiving the box of donuts and four hot chocolates, Derek was waiting off to the side for Meredith when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned on his heel and saw Meredith's father standing there, giving Derek a tentative smile.

"Thatcher," Derek greeted, slightly startled by his appearance, but even more nervous at how Meredith would react. "Nice to see you."

"You too," Thatcher returned, shoving one hand into his coat pocket as the fingers of his other hand nervously tapped against his paper coffee cup. "So, uh, how are you?"

"We've been really great. Meredith's getting bigger everyday—but don't tell her I said that," Derek laughed. "Working a lot, getting ready for the baby. How've you been?"

"Oh. Good. I'm working at U-Dub… research, you know. But I have the day off today, so I volunteered to babysit Laura for the day. Figured I could use all the caffeine I could get," he joked, holding up his large cup of coffee.

"Yeah, Mer and I watched her for a few hours over the holidays. Hard to believe she's three already," Derek said, swallowing thickly as he saw Meredith from the corner of his eye.

She stopped in her tracks for a few seconds, then approached the two of them, putting on her best smile. "Hi," Meredith said, placing a hand over her belly. "I uh… how are you? We haven't seen you in a while."

"Good, good," Thatcher nodded, his eyes immediately drawn to the baby bump under his daughter's shirt. "My God, look at you," he beamed.

Meredith bit her lip and blushed slightly. "Yeah. She's getting big, which means I'm getting big. I don't know if Lexie told you, but we've having a girl."

"Actually it was Laura," Thatcher chuckled. "I swear it's all she ever talks about. And I'm sorry—sorry that I haven't called. I was going to call… a few times, actually. But I know how busy you both are. I didn't want to bother you," he said apologetically.

Meredith waved it off. "Don't be sorry. It's… we could've called, too."

In an attempt to avoid what could become an even more awkward situation, Derek graciously intervened. "We should have you over for coffee sometime, or we can go out to lunch," he offered.

"That would be nice," Thatcher agreed. He smiled at Meredith, then quickly reached around to his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. "You know, I carry this around with me everywhere I go," he said, proudly showing them their daughter's eight week ultrasound photo they'd given him months ago.

"You do?" Meredith asked softly.

"Right next to a picture of Laura on her birthday," Thatcher said. "It's funny. You spend so many years carrying around pictures of your kids... now grandkids."

Derek smiled. "You should be very proud."

"I am," Thatcher nodded. "I'm proud every day."

"So, uh, I'll call you then, about lunch or something," Meredith said kindly. "It would be nice... to see you again soon."

"You too," Thatcher said, sincerity in his voice. He shook Derek's hand, then gently hugged Meredith.

Derek watched the gesture between father and daughter, and smiled to himself. Even if they were never the closest of family members, they had been making huge strides in the right direction for a while now, and Derek was glad for it. Not only for the two of them, but for his own daughter.

When they made it back to the car and pulled out of the parking lot, Meredith flipped open the donut box and began munching on her strawberry frosted one. "Of all the coffee shops in Seattle..."

"What? You two did fine," Derek assured her.

"I know," Meredith sighed. "I just feel awkward around him."

"Why?" Derek asked.

"I don't know. There's just a lot of... crap in our past, you know? But compared to how we used to be, I guess this is good, right?" she asked in between taking bites of her donut.

"Of course it is. You guys have made so much progress. He carries our ultrasound picture in his wallet. He cares about you," Derek pointed out.

Meredith smoothed her shirt over her belly. "I really think he wants to know her... the baby, I mean."

"He will," Derek said. "He'll be as good a grandpa to her as he is to Laura - if that's what you want. I think he's willing to make the effort."

"I want her to know him. She'll never meet my mom. I want her to know my dad," Meredith said, immediately feeling guilty. Her dad - the father that was absent most of her life - wanted to be involved, but Derek's dad never got the chance. When they stopped at the red light, she took his hand. "I'm sorry," she said.

Derek looked over at her. "For what?"

"You had a great dad. And he never got to meet any of his grandkids," Meredith explained, giving his hand a small squeeze. "I'm sorry she'll never meet him."

"It's okay," Derek said softly. "I think he's always with me. And he'll always look out for her," he said, nodding towards Meredith's belly. "Just like your mom will."

"You think so?"

Derek smiled assuredly. "I do."

Meredith leaned her head against the headrest and mirrored her husband's smile. "Good."

"Little Eloise is very impressive... already bringing families together," Derek boasted of his unborn daughter.

"Eloise? Like the little girl at the plaza? We're so not naming our daughter that," Meredith told him, laughing.

"I know. I just wanted to see how you reacted," he grinned, pulling into the driveway of their old house.

"Mmhmm," Meredith smirked as she shoved the last of her donut into her mouth. She handed Derek the carrier with the hot chocolates and made sure she had a good grip on the box of donuts before they got out of the car.

They walked up to the front door, knocked twice, then entered. "Hello?" Meredith called out.

Izzie met them in the foyer and smiled. "Hey," she said cheerfully. "Thanks for coming."

"It's no problem. You guys helped us move out. Happy to help," Derek said.

"We have donuts," Meredith said, handing Izzie the box so she could take off her coat. "And hot chocolate."

"Where'd this come from?" Izzie asked as she accepted the box.

Alex came down the stairs, adjusting the watch on his wrist. "Hey. Oh, donuts." Izzie opened the box for him and he scanned over the choices before pulling out a Boston cream and biting into it. "Where'd these come from?"

Meredith sighed amusedly. "From the coffee shop on Bryant Ave... where we just happened to run into my dad."

Alex laughed. "Nice."

"Haha," Meredith replied wryly. She shrugged. "It wasn't that bad, actually. He's... sweet. In a previously-estranged-father-daughter relationship kind of way."

"So you didn't plan this meeting?" Izzie joked, selecting a blueberry donut for herself.

Derek shook his head. "No. Mer had to pee, so we made a quick stop."

"She was bouncing around on my bladder. I couldn't hold it until we got here," Meredith explained.

Izzie's eyes traveled down to Meredith's bump and she gasped in delight. "Your belly button is sticking out."

"Yes, thank you for pointing that out," Meredith giggled. "Derek noticed this morning. I was going to change into a looser fitting shirt, but apparently, he finds it cute so I didn't."

"It _is _cute," Izzie agreed.

"Told you," Derek chuckled.

Alex wiped some cream from the donut from his mouth with the side of his hand and shrugged. "I think it's kinda creepy."

"That's what I said," Meredith replied, staring down at it. "But it means that she's growing, so I'm happy."

"Speaking of 'she,' pick a name yet?" Izzie hinted.

Meredith smirked. "No. Not yet."

"Iz, let it go. When they pick one, they'll tell you," Alex teased her, finishing off the last of his donut. "Is one of those for me?" he asked when he spotted the tray of hot chocolates sitting on the side table.

"Yeah, one for each of us," Meredith nodded. "Sorry it's not coffee. But I don't let Derek drink it on our days off. It's my rule."

"He knocked you up. Only fair," Alex kidded, taking a sip from his cup.

"I think so, too," Meredith said, smiling playfully at her husband. "Okay, go do your man stuff."

Derek took his hot chocolate from the carrier. "What are you two gonna do?"

"I'm going to feed her," Izzie replied, pointing to Meredith. "She's still way too tiny."

"Hello?" Meredith laughed. "I'm getting the basketball belly. And my boobs are like grapefruits."

"I wouldn't even know you were pregnant if you turned around," Izzie countered.

"You should see me naked then. That might change your mind," Meredith teased, taking her hot chocolate from Derek when he handed it to her. "Tell her, Derek."

Derek ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head. "I... have no comment," he chuckled.

"Okay, go," Meredith giggled, pointing toward the stairs so they could get done whatever needed to be done.

Derek and Alex nodded, and trudged up the steps, a hot chocolate in each of their hands. "We expect beers later!" Alex called out jokingly. "And pizza!"

"Got it!" Izzie yelled back. She turned to Meredith and smiled. "Come on, I have cobbler."

Meredith followed her friend into the kitchen and sat down on a stool at the island, ready to eat whatever Izzie put in front of her. As she was sipping on her hot chocolate, she nearly choked when the baby kicked again, hard. "Holy crap. Right in the side," she sputtered, managing to laugh.

"She kicked?" Izzie asked, eyes wide. "Can I feel?"

"Yeah." Meredith took her hand and placed it where her daughter's tiny feet were busy kicking. "Feel that?" she asked as her daughter delivered a more mild kick this time.

"Oh my God," Izzie all but whimpered, smiling sappily at her. "That's so adorable."

Meredith laughed as she tucked some hair behind her ear. "Last night, she did that while... you know," she said. "Derek and I were... anyway, yeah, he was pretty freaked out."

"Did he keep going?" Izzie asked interestedly as she sliced Meredith a piece of cobbler out of the pan.

"I wanted him to," Meredith divulged, knowing that if Derek knew she was sharing tidbits of their sex life, he'd be mortified. "But he waited until she stopped. It's my fault. I accidentally put my hand on my belly when she started doing it, then he kind of knew," Meredith giggled.

Izzie put a slice of peach cobbler in front of Meredith, then cut herself a piece. "So... how is the sex?" she asked candidly.

"Izzie," Meredith gasped lightly, putting a forkful of the pastry into her mouth.

"What?"

Meredith sighed and gave in. She and Izzie had been friends for five years; sharing sex details was practically a given. "That book you gave us has lots of pregnancy positions in it. Fun stuff," she said. "Which is good, because once she's born, no sex for six weeks. And even then, it'll be tough to find the time at first. But yeah, pregnancy sex? I _highly_ recommend it. We're doing things we've never done before."

"That makes me really glad you guys don't sleep down the hall anymore," Izzie said jokingly.

Meredith blushed. "We broke a headboard trying to make a baby this summer," she admitted before glancing down at her belly. "Definitely worth it though."

Izzie couldn't help but agree. The proof was not so hidden under her friend's shirt. "Guess it was."

Two hours passed before Alex and Derek trudged back down the stairs, hauling boxes of goodwill items, bags of trash, and a few other odds and ends that Derek thought Meredith might want to hold onto from her childhood. "All done?" Izzie asked, a beer in each hand, as she and Meredith emerged from the kitchen.

"Mostly dusty crap," Alex shrugged, wiping the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand. He smiled when Izzie handed him the beer. "Thanks."

"We found a box labeled 'Meredith - baby stuff,'" Derek grinned, taking the other beer from Izzie. "I'm excited to look through that."

Meredith rolled her eyes amusedly. "Probably just blackmail pictures."

"I still wanna keep them," Derek upheld. "That way our daughter can have them."

"Yeah," Meredith smiled as she leaned against the banister, one hand draped over her belly. "That would be nice."

"Pizza should be here soon," Izzie said. "One pepperoni and one Hawaiian."

"Hawaiian?" Alex asked before downing another sip of his beer.

"Pineapples, ham, and bacon," Meredith said excitedly. "When I saw it on the menu, I made Izzie get it. I've been craving pineapple all day."

Derek smiled in feigned agreement. The thought of pineapple on pizza didn't appeal to him at all, but for Meredith, he'd have a slice. It was the least he could do, considering that she was housing their daughter. "Mmm... sounds good."

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "I can't tell if you're mocking me or not."

"Would I mock you?"

She laughed. "Yes."

...

Meredith sat up in their bed, a large pillow behind her to support her back, and paged through the photo album that had been buried in the back of the attic at the old house all this time. It was comforting to know that at least her father cared enough to take pictures, but also sad that her childhood was really only documented until she was five. After that, other than her school portraits, the rest of her life wasn't really preserved through film. Just random pictures here and there by relatives at family events, or with her friends while she was in grade school. Still though, she smiled. Because their daughter was going to have millions of pictures. Baby days, kindergarten graduation, birthday parties, holidays, proms, her wedding. All of it.

"Hey," Derek said as he stepped out of the bathroom, freshly showered and wearing pajama pants and a tee shirt. He slid under his side of the covers and kissed her cheek. "Still looking through this?"

"Yeah," Meredith replied. She saw a picture of her five year old self smiling in her kindergarten picture, with pigtails and a missing front tooth. "I haven't seen this picture in twenty five years," she said.

Derek kissed her temple. "You were a beautiful little girl," he said softly. "I think she's gonna look just like you."

"Only she'll have perfect hair and be chatty like you," Meredith giggled. She felt the baby's foot pressing into her side, her hand coming to rest over the spot on her swollen belly. "See, she agrees with me."

"Is she moving around?" Derek asked, placing his hand next to hers.

"Yeah. She always seems to move around before bedtime. I guess she's getting herself comfy for the night," Meredith joked. "Maybe it's her way of telling us to go to bed so she can get some sleep."

Derek chuckled. "Daddy promises that we'll go to bed very soon," he said to her belly.

Meredith flipped the thick photo album closed and set it gently on her nightstand. "More tomorrow," she yawned. She glanced to the box on the floor full of her childhood items. Unable to resist looking through it, she turned to Derek. "Could you get that box?"

"Yeah," he nodded, flinging back the covers and hoisting the cardboard box up onto the bed. There was a light brown teddy bear on top, and Derek pulled it out. "Cute," he grinned. "Does he have a name?"

"No idea. Maybe when I was three he did," Meredith laughed. "I think I got it for Christmas." She rummaged through the box some more and pulled out a worn, plush doll from inside. "Oh my God," she said softly, running her fingers through its yellow yarn hair.

"What's this?" Derek asked.

Meredith smiled. "My Lilly doll. I got her the day I was born. I had no idea I still had this..."

"Well, she was clearly your favorite," Derek judged, based on the doll's wear and tear.

"Yeah. I brought her everywhere. She's in just as many pictures as I am," Meredith said. "I really can't believe she's been in that box all this time."

"Who named her?" Derek asked as Meredith handed him the soft pink baby doll.

"I don't know. She was always just Lilly." Meredith smiled sadly, nostalgically. "After my dad left, she was all I had. My mom never wanted pets, so she was who I talked to."

Derek wrapped his arm around her and kissed her cheek. "Looks like she's been good to you."

"Yeah," Meredith whispered. "She really was."

Silence permeated the air for several moments while Meredith rested her head on Derek's shoulder. He traced his fingers down the tattered seam of the doll's dress, a small smile coming over his face. "What about Lilly?" he said.

"Hmm?" she hummed.

"Lilly. For the baby," Derek clarified.

Meredith raised her head to meet his eye line, contemplating the idea. She blinked a few times as she stared at her little doll Derek was holding, then she smiled back at him. "Lilly," she repeated, listening to how it sounded when it rolled off her tongue. "Lilly," she said again, slower this time.

"Lilly Shepherd," Derek added, testing the waters.

Their daughter gave her a gentle kick, perhaps one last attempt to get comfortable for the night, and Meredith rubbed her palm over her bump like she'd done minutes before. "Lilly Shepherd," she whispered, gazing down at her swollen belly. When she looked at her husband again, all she could do was nod and smile some more. "I love that."

"Me too," he said, a grin radiating from his face.

Meredith laughed, giddy with joy and relief and love for the tiny person kicking her from the inside. "Did we really just name our child?"

Derek leaned in and kissed her, then settled his forehead against hers. "I think we did," he said. "Only took us twenty-five weeks."

"It's beautiful," Meredith said softly. She felt the pregnant lady tears burning in her eyes and she giggled, grabbing a tissue from the box on her nightstand. "So, okay then. Lilly."

"With two _L_s?" Derek asked.

"Two _L_s," she echoed. "I like it with two instead of one." The enormity of the moment hit her and she ran a hand through her hair. "Our daughter has a name."

Derek leaned down and kissed her belly. "Hear that? You're officially named."

"Yes, you are," Meredith smiled.

"Now she just needs a middle name. Any other dolls in that box?" he teased.

"Don't think so," Meredith said, laughing. "We picked a first name. That's enough for tonight."

His palms settled on her cheeks and Derek pressed his lip against Meredith's, moaning when her lips parted and she granted his tongue entry into her mouth. "Hmm..." he moaned. "Are we..."

"Having sex?" she finished for him. "I guess we could. We did just make a kind of huge decision - without even arguing about it."

"We did," Derek agreed. "It's very impressive."

Meredith smiled at Derek as he lifted up her shirt and kissed imaginary circles onto the skin of her swollen abdomen. This was one of the more profound moments in life, and she planned on reveling in it with her husband.

"We love you, Lilly," he whispered against her skin.

Her heart fluttered inside her chest when Derek said it. And Meredith knew they'd chosen right when Lilly gave the inside of her belly a tiny, approving kick upon hearing her father's voice as he called their daughter by her name for the first time.


	90. Pink Paint and a Middle Name

**Disclaimer: Only in my dreams. In reality: no. But how awesome were Mer and Derek on Thursday? I'm loving this season. Oh, and once again, thanks for being patient with me between updates. I'm doing my best to bank chapters. :)  
**

"Childbirth is scary," Meredith said as she and Derek walked back to their car after their first Lamaze class. Now that Meredith was twenty-eight weeks pregnant, Dr. Halloran suggested they register themselves for classes. Only now, Meredith was wishing she was simply left in the dark.

"You've delivered babies before," he chuckled. "You already know what to expect. That's an advantage that not a lot of people have." Derek opened the car door for her and she dropped down into the passenger seat, instantly kicking her shoes off her slightly swollen feet. Derek walked around to the other side and slid in, handing her the folder that contained their endless Lamaze pamphlets and class schedules.

Meredith laughed. "Yes, I know. But this time, it'll be _my_ vagina. Not someone else's," she pointed out as she shuddered. "Seriously, showing us the childbirth video at the first class? Who does that?"

"Think of all us expectant fathers in the room. It wasn't much fun for us either," Derek said, wincing. It wasn't that he was grossed out by it; he just knew that when the day came, seeing Meredith in pain would be hard on him, knowing that there was nothing he could do to take it away.

"Wanna trade places?" Meredith teased.

"I couldn't do it," Derek admitted as they pulled out of the parking lot. "You have a much higher pain threshold than I do."

"Hmm, that's true," she agreed. "I managed to work for two hours before I found out I had appendicitis. And you need me to cuddle you when you have a stomach ache," Meredith smirked.

Derek grinned, lifting her hand that rested on his lap and kissing the top of it. "See? Way more badass. Childbirth will be a breeze... fine, maybe not a breeze, but you'll do awesome. And we still have another twelve weeks before that happens anyway."

"Twelve weeks," Meredith echoed, her breath catching in her throat. "Holy crap. That means there's only three months left."

"Plenty of time," Derek reassured her. "Did you want to go to the paint store? If you're tired, we can go home. There's always tomorrow," he said, hoping it didn't sound like he was being hover-y and annoying.

"No, we can go. I want to get some paint swatches. Apparently, there's a thousand different shades of pink, so I want us to narrow it down to at least a hundred by Friday," she teased.

"Okay," Derek chuckled. "Sounds like a good plan."

Meredith felt Lilly gently nudge her in the side with what she supposed was the heel of her foot and laughed. "You okay, Lilly?" she asked.

"I still love how that sounds," Derek grinned, happy that they decided on a name. They'd picked it three weeks ago, and had been calling their daughter by it ever since. And over that time, it had become her name. She was Lilly now, through and through.

"Me too," Meredith said softly. "We still need a middle name."

"Does it have to have Izzie's stamp of approval?" Derek teased as he switched lanes.

Meredith smiled. "Well, when we told her that we're naming the baby Lilly, she practically did cartwheels. She definitely loves that name. Everyone else does, too. Although Cristina said that Lilly wasn't a hardcore surgeon name. But I told her that when our daughter walks across the stage at her graduation from medical school, she'd change her mind," she stated proudly.

"Yes she will," Derek nodded, making a right into the parking lot of the home improvement store to pick up paint swatches. After he pulled into the closest parking space he could find, they unbuckled their seatbelts and Derek waited for Meredith to slip her shoes back on before they got out.

"I'm going to need a lot of foot massages over the next twelve weeks," Meredith told him. "Just so you know..."

"Okay," Derek happily agreed. Foot massages, back massages, shoulder massages... ninety-nine percent of the time, those activities led to sex. So of course, he was hardly opposed. He took her hand once they exited the car, and walked into the store, heading right for the paint department.

"Over here," Meredith said when she spotted a thick booklet full of color choices. She flipped through it, smiling when she reached the section with the pinks. "This looks good. And it's perforated, so we can tear out the ones we like."

"Looks good to me," Derek echoed. "Do we need anything else?"

"Are you building her crib?" Meredith asked.

Derek eyed her curiously, then shook his head. "Wasn't planning on it," he chuckled.

"We're done then," she giggled.

...

"Fairytale pink," Meredith said, reading the name of one of the hundred pink shades they'd pulled from the paint color book.

"I like that," Derek replied. "Put that in the Maybe pile."

Meredith did so, then showed Derek another one. "Very berry."

"Too dark." He slid the tray of cookies into the oven and closed the door; Meredith craved them all day, so Derek was commissioned to whip up several dozen upon returning home. He found her spontaneous cravings adorable, though he could feel himself gaining weight right along with her, only she had an excuse.

"Yeah, you're right." She tossed it into the No pile, then hopped up off the stool. "This is a lot harder than I thought it would be."

"A lot of these are really pale. Like this one," he said, holding one of them up to show her as she browsed the fridge. "Pink Whisper. It's practically white. Something like this would be better." Derek picked up a darker shade and held it up. "Coral passion."

Meredith giggled. "That sounds like a porn name," she said, pulling a bottle of juice from the fridge and two glasses.

"True," Derek chuckled. "But still a nice color."

"Oh, the one next to the pepper shaker is nice," she said as she poured them both some apple juice, something else she craved these days.

Derek picked it up off the countertop and read the name. "Pink peony," he read. "My Aunt Helen's whole house was painted this color. I can practically smell her musky perfume when I look at this," he teased.

Meredith smirked at him. "Okay, I'm supposed to be the picky one; not you."

"I'm just saying. I don't want to walk into our daughter's nursery and think of my aunt's perfume every time. I gag just thinking out it," Derek laughed, before taking a sip of the juice Meredith poured for him.

"Fair enough," she consented. "What about... oh, this one."

"Cotton candy," Derek read. "This is nice."

"If we have a boy next, we're going to have to do this all over again. Only with a table full of blue instead," Meredith said, popping a chocolate chip into her mouth that was leftover from the cookies.

Derek grinned confidently. "I think it'll be another girl. You know, once we make another one."

"Uh huh," she giggled. "You sound pretty sure of yourself."

"Well, I was right about this one, wasn't I?" he pointed out.

"Lucky guess," Meredith teased. "Your psychic skills are very sexy."

"Hmm, I try," Derek whispered against her skin as he kissed her cheek. "All part of my plan to be constantly impressive."

She laughed. "Well, you're very good at it." Just as he was about to kiss her lips, Meredith spotted a color swatch she liked and turned her head. When Derek was met with her cheek again, he gave her a disappointed look and she smiled. "Sorry. I didn't mean to deny you. I just saw a pink that I really like."

"Which one?" he asked.

"This." Meredith reached across the counter and picked it up. It was a cheerful pink, not too dark, light, or bright. Perfect for a little girl's nursery. She smiled when she read the name. "Sexy Pink."

"Sexy?" he asked, waiting for confirmation. "Does Victoria's Secret have a line of interior paint now?" Derek chuckled.

Meredith giggled. "I love this one. It reminds me of springtime... or whatever."

"It is nice," Derek admitted. "Very cheerful."

"This could be our winner," Meredith said, smiling at him. "What do you think?"

"Definitely the best one in our Maybe pile," he said. "'Sexy Pink' really isn't the color I thought I'd be painting our daughter's nursery."

"Just... ignore the name. The color is good, right?"

"Yeah, it is. We could always buy a sample size and test it out first, just in case. But this looks like our winner," Derek agreed with her. "Sexy Pink it is."

"The more you say it, the more I like it," Meredith told him. "Her room will have character."

Derek kissed her, making sure to catch her lips this time. "Hmm, true," he murmured.

"Now if we could choose a middle name, we'd be ahead of the game," Meredith replied, weaving her fingers through his curls.

"Katherine?" Derek suggested.

"No."

"Olivia?"

"Syph nurse. No," she reminded him. "Danielle?"

Derek contemplated for a few seconds. "Maybe."

"Madeline?" Meredith said.

"Another maybe. You're good with middle names," he complimented. "Elise?"

"Elise," she repeated, biting on her lip. "I like that, too."

"Grace?" When she looked at him, incredulous, he decided to elaborate. "Not because of the hospital. I just really like that name."

"Yeah?"

He nodded. "I've always liked it."

"Grace," she said. "Non-hospital Grace."

"Non-hospital Grace," Derek chuckled. "Just Grace because we like it... or do you not like it?"

"No, I do. I really do. I just never thought about it before," Meredith admitted. She smiled at him. "Lilly Grace."

"I like it," Derek grinned.

"You say it," she said. "So I can picture you calling her that."

"Lilly Grace," Derek said softly. "Lilly Grace Shepherd."

Meredith felt goosebumps prick her skin, and she smiled at Derek. "Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"I love it," she said.

Derek cupped her cheeks in the palms of his hands and kissed her. "So do I."

"So... we just named our daughter._ And _picked a paint color."

"It's a good day," Derek said.

"You know what would make it even better?" Meredith asked playfully.

Derek smirked. These days, there was usually only one answer to this question. "Sex?" he assumed.

"French onion soup," she answered. "Like the kind they give you at restaurants. You know, with the cheese spilling over the bowl."

"There's cookies in the oven," Derek reminded her.

"Yes, those can be for dessert. But I really want French onion soup. Oh, and Pop-tarts. You know, the S'mores kind? I used to eat them all the time in college, and they sound so good right now," Meredith rambled off to him.

Derek heaved a heavy sigh, hoping she'd take pity on him and change her mind so he wouldn't have to trek out to fulfill her cravings. But Meredith just smirked at him, unmoved. "Okay, remember that childbirth video we saw today? That'll be me in twelve weeks, all sweaty and panting and screaming as our baby works her way out of me. Still want to deny me?"

Rather than anger the pregnancy gods, Derek conceded, smiling at her. "No, I don't. Anything else?" he chuckled.

"No, just the soup and the Pop-tarts," Meredith said sweetly, knowing he was too nice to say no. She could ask him to go fishing off a ferryboat and come back with a cooler of trout, and he'd do it with a smile on his face. As far as husbands went, she knew she'd kind of hit the jackpot. "You're sure you don't mind?"

"Nope, not at all." Derek walked over to the oven, slipped on the oven mitt, and took the tray of cookies out. "I'll scrape these off and put them on a plate. Then I'll go."

As he worked at the counter, Meredith wrapped her arms around him as best she could with her belly between them and kissed his neck. "You're getting dirty, hot sex tonight."

Derek glanced around and smirked at her. "Hmm, well, I probably do deserve it," he joked.

"Yes," she giggled. "You do."

He deposited the last cookie on the plate and tossed the pan and spatula into the sink. "I'll be back as soon as I can," Derek said before kissing her forehead.

"Thank you," Meredith replied, munching on a cookie. "We appreciate it."

Derek chuckled. "Don't drag our daughter into this. She doesn't know what French onion soup is. Or Pop-tarts."

"No, but she's the reason I want them. Pregnancy, Der. It does strange things to a person," she explained as they walked to the front door.

"Okay," Derek relented, deciding that agreeing with her was probably better than the alternative. After putting on his coat and taking his keys off the hook in the foyer, he kissed her. "Love you. And you," he said to her belly.

"We love you, too," Meredith said softly, watching him as he walked out to the car in the driveway and began his trek for her food. She patted her belly proudly and smiled. "That's called manipulating Daddy, Lilly. Don't worry; I'll teach you how it's done," she said to their in-utero daughter, taking the last bite of her cookie.

As she was folding a basket of clean clothes fresh out of the dryer, Meredith's cell phone rang from its spot on the end table, and she reached over, checking the caller ID before picking it up.

_Izzie._

"Hello?" Meredith answered, folding one of Derek's tee shirts on her bump of a belly, which came in handy while folding laundry, she'd noticed recently.

"Hey," came Izzie's voice on the other end. "Whatcha up to?"

"Laundry. And wondering how apples and ranch dressing would taste. Does that sound gross to you?" Meredith pondered out loud to her friend.

"Yes," Izzie replied. "But hey, you're the pregnant one, so have at it."

Meredith smiled. "That's what I figured."

"So I was just wondering where you and Derek signed up for your baby registry," Izzie said. "Babies 'R' Us? Baby Depot?"

"We didn't do a baby registry," Meredith said.

"Meredith," Izzie whined.

"What?"

Izzie sighed into the phone. "You're supposed to. That's what people do for firstborns. So that the baby shower guests know what gifts to give you."

"Baby stuff is expensive, Iz. I don't want you guys buying our car seat or a Diaper Genie or my breast pump," Meredith said.

"How about little things then?" Izzie attempted to compromise. "A box of diapers, or little pink dresses and hairbows, or even pacifiers. Just so you have gifts to open."

"Fine," Meredith agreed quickly. She knew that arguing would just be futile. "Derek and I both have this weekend off, so we'll go tomorrow. Babies 'R' Us."

Even though she couldn't see her, Meredith just knew Izzie was smiling in victory. "Thank you."

"So, uh, when is this baby shower?" Meredith asked, trying to sound casual.

"Nice try. Not telling," Izzie said, upholding her wall of secrecy. "But I will tell you that it's co-ed."

"Co-ed?" Meredith questioned in disbelief, folding a pair of her panties. "Do co-ed baby showers even exist?"

"Well, I know you said you wanted Derek to come, so I convinced Alex to stay, too, once I told him there'd be food and beer. Cristina told Hunt about it. Well, I made her tell Hunt about it. And then Sloan got wind of it, and pretty much invited himself. By the way, Bridget is coming. I called her already. And George knows, too, and he's in."

Meredith laughed. "What the hell are they going to do at a baby shower?"

"Eat and drink. I'm buying hot dogs and hamburgers that they can grill, so they can feel manly," Izzie explained, proud that she'd managed to get men to attend in the first place.

"Nice work," Meredith complimented. She hoisted herself off the couch and walked toward the kitchen. "So you're seriously not gonna tell me when this is, so I can prepare for it?"

"Well, it's soon, obviously. Look at you. It's not too soon, but before your water is set to break," Izzie offered.

Meredith smirked, pulling the bottle of ranch dressing and a green apple from the fridge. She couldn't resist. The cravings were just too damn tempting. "That narrows it down," she said sarcastically. "Derek knows, doesn't he?"

"Yes, he knows. And I've sworn him to secrecy, so don't even try to get it out of him by using sex," Izzie warned.

Meredith giggled. "He still wouldn't tell me, don't worry."

"Good," Izzie said. "Oh! Before I forget, how's ''Project: Middle Name' going? I still want to get stuff printed with Lilly's name on it, but I want to use her middle name, too."

Meredith took a knife from the utensil drawer and began cutting herself apple slices, the bottle of ranch dressing waiting patiently on the counter. "Oh, well, we actually chose one an hour ago," she said excitedly. "Grace. But not because of the hospital. That would be so tacky. And cheesy, and bad. Derek and I just really love that name, and we think it fits with Lilly," Meredith rambled. "Anyway, yeah. Lilly Grace."

"That's beautiful," Izzie beamed on the other end. "And she's obviously going to be beautiful, so that name will suit her well."

"Thank you, Iz," Meredith said softly. She saw the paint swatches sitting on the countertop and smiled. "Oh! And I'll make you even more proud of me. We chose a paint color today, too."

"Good!" she practically cheered. "Pink, right? Please tell me you're not doing the gender neutral thing."

"Yes, it's pink. Derek said he'd repaint if the next one is a boy," Meredith told her as she bit into an apple slice.

"What if you have a girl after the boy?" Izzie asked.

Meredith opened the bottle of salad dressing and shook her head. "Two kids. That's it. Then Derek goes back to wearing a condom."

"Mmhmm..."

"What?"

If Izzie were in front of her, Meredith knew she'd be giving her a look of incredulity. And it was probably the face she was making now. "With the way you two go at it, I'm guessing you'll have no fewer than five."

Meredith nearly choked on her apple slice as she laughed. "No way. Two. If we survive two, we'll entertain the idea of a third."

"So no fewer than two?" Izzie said.

"No, we definitely want her to have a brother or sister. Being an only child sucked. We want them to have each other, you know? Oh, and cousins, too. So get working on that," Meredith teased as she dipped a piece of her apple in her small bowl of dressing and ate it. She nearly moaned at how good it was, though she knew that if Derek saw what she was eating, he'd probably gag.

"Two years or so, I promise," Izzie responded. "Alex and I want to wait until residency is over. You're lucky you married an attending. Attendings have much better schedules than we do."

"Believe me, I know," Meredith said as she chewed. "Sometimes, I think the only reason Derek goes into work is because I'm there, and he'd be bored sitting at home all day by himself," she joked.

"Wouldn't put it past him," Izzie agreed. "You two are sickeningly sweet these days," she mocked playfully.

Meredith took her snack into the living room and dropped down onto the couch, her plate resting on her belly. "He was always cheesy. I blame my hormones. Seriously, Iz. Wait until you're pregnant one day. You'll want sex twenty-four-seven. Oh, and cuddling. And food. Weird food."

"Are you eating that disgusting apple and ranch dressing concoction now?" Izzie guessed.

Meredith licked some dressing off her finger and smiled. "Yes I am. And it's delicious."

"You're crazy now..." Izzie decided.

"You should serve these at the baby shower," Meredith suggested. She heard Derek's car pull into the driveway and she got up to open the front door for him; it was the least she could do after she'd sent him out on his travels. "They'd be a hit."

"Yeah, okay," Izzie said mockingly.

"Well, my fancy attending is home now with my food," she said.

"You sent him on a food run?"

Meredith shrugged. "Only for two things. I didn't send him across town or anything," she said in her own defense.

"You live in the wilderness. Everything is across town," Izzie pointed out.

"I promised him dirty, hot sex tonight. He'd fly across the country if I asked him to," Meredith replied, knowing Izzie couldn't deny that one.

"Okay, I'll let you go," Izzie laughed. "Oh! And don't forget about the baby registry."

"We won't."

"Otherwise, I'll go there myself and do it..." Izzie warned her, only half kidding.

Meredith huffed, holding the front door open for Derek when he walked into the house. "We're doing it tomorrow. You have my word."

"Okay," Izzie said. "Talk to you later."

"Bye," Meredith said with a smile, ending the call. She took the brown bag that contained the soup and Pop-tarts from Derek, and a plastic bag from the home improvement store. "What's this?" she asked.

Derek grinned as he hung his coat on the hook. "Sexy Pink," he replied. "I passed there coming home from the restaurant where I got your soup, so I swung by and picked up a sample. We can test it on the wall to see how we like it."

"You did?" Meredith asked, tugging on her bottom lip with her teeth as she smiled sweetly at him. "Thank you."

"I figured you'd send me out for that later, so I saved myself a trip," he chuckled, taking the bags from her and following her into the kitchen. "Who called?"

"Izzie. Apparently, we have to do a baby registry or we'll disrupt the balance of the universe..." Meredith said sarcastically, giggling. "So I told her we'd do it tomorrow."

"I don't want them to have to buy us anything big. Baby things are pricey," Derek said as he took the soup and Pop-tarts from the grocery bag and set them on the table.

Meredith grabbed a spoon and pulled off the lid to the soup container, eager to dig in. "That's what I told her," she said. "But she said we could just do little things. Stuffed animals or onesies or whatever. Maybe while we're there, we can order furniture, too. We can move it all in after we paint."

"Sounds good," Derek nodded. He shuffled through a drawer and pulled out a pen and a notepad. "We should make a list of what we need. Otherwise, we're gonna be overwhelmed in there."

"Well, a crib, obviously," Meredith said as she twirled some of the mozzarella cheese from the top of her soup on her finger. "By the way, thank you for this. And the Pop-tarts. Your crazy, pregnant wife appreciates it."

Derek kissed her cheek and laughed. "Happy to do it," he replied. "Okay, crib. Changing table. Rocking chair. Dresser." He scribbled the items on the paper then looked to her for more.

"Uh... oh, one of those baby tubs. And a bath seat for when she's a little older," she said. "Bedding. Lots of blankets and clothes. Bibs. Bottles. Towels. A bassinet for our room."

"Uh huh," Derek agreed, writing them all down. "Swing. Stroller. "

"Car seat. Baby sling," Meredith dictated. "Oh, and one of those rocky seat things... you know, those things that vibrate to help her sleep. Diapers, wipes, diaper rash cream, powder... we should probably buy that stuff in bulk."

"Okay," Derek said. "Um, oh, play pen. Baby monitors."

"All of the things I'll need for breastfeeding," Meredith remembered. "A pump, a nursing pillow, all that."

Derek wrote quickly to get them all written down, and Meredith smiled. "Good thing you bring home the big bucks," she giggled. "That's just some of what we need."

"That's okay," he shrugged. "I want her to have the best of everything... from diaper rash cream to party dresses," Derek beamed.

Meredith glanced down at her belly and smiled amusedly. "Hear that, Lilly? Even your tiny little hiney is going to be pampered."

"But we're not going to spoil you," Derek added.

"No, definitely not spoiling her. She's just going to be happy. And rash-free," Meredith said, giggling.

"Definitely rash-free," he guaranteed. "That's very important."

"You know, I've only changed, like... three diapers in my whole life," she said.

"I've changed tons. Don't worry, you'll be a pro by the time we bring her home from the hospital. Besides, we're in this together. The only thing I can't do is breastfeed. Or, you know, give birth. But everything else? I'm right there."

"So if she poops in the middle of the night, you'll pop right out of bed and change her?" Meredith asked, handing him her spoon so he could have some of her soup.

He accepted the spoon, chuckling. "Well, maybe not pop. But I'll trudge happily and do it, yes."

Meredith opened the box of Pop-tarts and smiled at her husband. "Fair enough."


	91. Ten Weeks to Go

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows; I'm just a poor college student.**

**It seems like interest in this fic has dwindled recently. So if you leave a review, could you just let me know if you're interested in me continuing this beyond the pregnancy? I could stop there if people would prefer, because that could work as an ending. But if you'd like me to go on beyond the birth, please let me know. I just want to get some opinions so I know whether to wrap things up sooner rather than later. Anyway, hope you enjoy the chapter. :)  
**

Meredith smiled at her sleeping husband, resisting the urge to reach out and touch him. She would have if he were awake, but he just looked so adorably peaceful with his mouth slightly ajar as he breathed, the blanket rising and falling with each inhale and exhale.

She glanced over at the clock. 10:30. They'd still been at work twelve hours ago, dealing with a trauma that rolled into the ER around eight. A lovely group of drunken teenagers that decided to go for a Friday night joyride down the highway. Meredith shook her head and sighed, glancing down at her belly. There's no way in hell Lilly would ever do that, she already knew. By the time they'd walked through the door and had just enough energy left to shower and crawl into bed, it was after one in the morning.

Resting her head against the headboard, she shut her eyes. Trying to go back to sleep now was useless. She'd been up twice to pee in the last hour, and anytime she tried in vain to get a few more hours, minutes, anything resembling sleep, Lilly jolted her awake again with tiny but distinguishable kicks to her ribs. So now, Meredith was just waiting for Derek to wake up. She considered getting up and putting on a pot of coffee, but knew that without her weight and warmth in the bed next to him, Derek would know she wasn't there and would get up, too. And she wanted him to sleep, because today was the Saturday he and Mark were going to paint Lilly's nursery.

Charlie sleepily stretched out and yawned from his doggie bed under the window and hopped up onto their bed, snuggling his way into Meredith's lap. Or whatever lap she had left because of the bump in the way. "Hey, buddy," Meredith whispered, scratching him under his chin then behind his ears. "Your sister is insisting that I stay awake."

Derek peeked his eyes open, getting used to the light in the room, then smiled at her. "Hey."

"Hey." Meredith leaned over and kissed his forehead. She combed her fingers through his hair, smiling back at him. They didn't get nearly enough days to sleep in, so whenever they did, they relished in it as long as they could. "Tired, huh?"

"Hmm, what time is it?" he asked, yawning.

"Almost eleven."

Derek chuckled. "Yeah, guess I was. Why are you awake?"

"Lilly," Meredith said. "I think she's using my bladder as a pillow."

"Bouncing around in there?" Derek asked, propping himself up on his elbow and kissing her belly.

"She's very busy today," Meredith told him. "I think space is getting very limited."

"Ten more weeks, then you can come out," he told his daughter.

"Ten weeks. Is it bad that I wish it was May 29th already so we could just meet her? I'm getting impatient," she giggled.

"Me, too. But we'll make it," Derek said, smiling at her. "She still has ten more weeks' worth of growing to do."

Meredith swallowed thickly and made a face. "I can't imagine pushing her out at the size she is now."

"Your body was designed to do it. You'll be fine," he tried to reassure her.

"Only a man would say that," she said, rolling her eyes playfully at him. "Expect a lot of cursing and yelling, that's all I'm saying."

"I can handle that." Derek pulled himself into a sitting position and glanced over at the clock. "Wanna get a shower before Mark gets here?"

"Is that code for sex? Because I'm pretty sure shower sex is impossible now," Meredith said amusedly as she gestured to her belly.

Derek shook his head. "Not sex. Just a shower."

"Yeah," Meredith agreed, rubbing the last of her tiredness from her eyes. "A shower would be good."

"Can I still feel you up?" he grinned.

Meredith whacked him lightly with her pillow, but he looked too adorable with his bed head hair and pajamas to say no. "Hmm, fine."

...

"Okay, that shouldn't have taken a half hour," Meredith reprimanded her husband, smirking at him as he finally turned off the shower knobs.

Derek got out first, then took her hand so she could step over the ledge, too. "As I recall, you enjoyed all the kissing."

"Yeah. I did," she admitted. She handed him a towel and took one for herself. "But still. Think of how much water we wasted."

"Hmm, worth it," Derek pointed out, leaning in and kissing her.

They walked into their bedroom, and Derek saw his phone blinking, signaling a new text. He swiped it off the nightstand and read the message on the screen. "Mark's down in the kitchen," he said, a slightly confused look on his face.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"I don't know. He texted me. _In your kitchen. Used the key. Don't be alarmed_," Derek read. He looked up at Meredith. "We gave him a key?"

"For emergencies," she nodded.

Derek chuckled. "Was a bear chasing him?" he said, amused. "Whatever. At least he warned us."

Meredith saw him typing on his phone and cocked her head. "What're you doing?" she asked, shedding her towel and pulling a pair of panties up her legs.

"Telling him to start breakfast," Derek shrugged. "May as well make himself useful."

"It's almost noon," she reminded him. "Well, we did ask him to be here around lunchtime. It's... 11:43."

"Of course, the one and only time he's prompt, we're making out in the shower," Derek couldn't help but laugh.

"At least we weren't having sex. Our shower echoes. He would've heard us."

"Well, we were doing a good bit of moaning in there today," Derek said. "He might have."

Meredith blushed. "Crap."

"Who cares? You and I are married. We don't have to be ashamed. He's the one that let himself into the house and is currently helping himself to our Captain Crunch," Derek chuckled as he pulled on a pair of boxers.

"He better not be eating the Captain Crunch. Lilly and I were going to have a breakfast date with him," Meredith giggled. "It's one of the few cereals that doesn't get soggy that fast. Soggy cereal makes me nauseous," she said, her stomach churning even thinking about it. Before getting pregnant, it didn't bother her in the slightest; now, the cereal had to be crunchy when she ate it, or else.

"I bought two boxes when I went shopping the other night. Crunch Berries and the peanut butter kind," Derek said.

"You did?"

Derek grabbed a pair of old sweats from his closet, ones he didn't mind getting paint on, and hopped into them. "Yeah. I knew we were running low, so I stocked up."

"If Mark wasn't downstairs, you'd get sex for that," Meredith smiled, putting on her own pair of yoga pants.

"For buying cereal?" Derek chuckled. "Damn. If I knew that, I would've told you the night I bought them. By the way, you look really hot in those pants," he said, rolling deodorant under his arms, then reaching for an old tee shirt.

Meredith rubbed cocoa butter over her belly and breasts, quickly glancing at herself in the mirror. "You still think I'm sexy?"

"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?" Derek asked.

"Because my boobs are already engorged, and I've gained about twenty pounds in my ass," Meredith said, latching her bra in place. "See? They're practically spilling over the top."

"Meredith," Derek sighed, admiring her soft, glowy pregnant body. "You're just as sexy as you were the day we met. I'll still think that, even when we're both old and wrinkly and incontinent."

She giggled at his ability to put a dorky, charming spin on everything, smiling at him. "Okay."

"You sure we can't have a quickie? Mark would never have to know..." Derek bargained with her.

"Later," Meredith said, watching as he coiffed his hair to perfection. Even watching him do that turned her on. Before she could change her mind, she fished through her drawer for one of her camisoles and slipped it over her torso, smoothing it out over her bump. "A quickie would just make me horny for more. I want to have you all to myself for hours. You know, once Mark leaves."

Derek kissed her cheek as she brushed out her damp hair in the mirror. "Okay, then."

They went downstairs and into the kitchen, both of them smiling when they saw Mark sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee and a cheese danish. He heard their footsteps and looked up from the newspaper. "Morning, lovebirds. Well, afternoon. It's... 12:03. Nice of you to answer the door when I knock."

"Nice of you to help yourself to coffee and pastries," Derek shot back jokingly, pouring himself his own cup of coffee.

"I made that coffee you're drinking," Mark said. "The least you can do is say thank you."

"Thank you," Derek said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, Grey," Mark greeted.

Meredith got a bowl from the cupboard and the box of Captain Crunch from the cabinet below. "Hey," she returned.

"How's baby Grey?" he asked.

"She's good. And she's been wide awake for two hours now," Meredith said, smiling down at her belly. "Kicking me a lot."

"Maybe she knew Uncle Mark was coming today," Mark said boastfully. He shoved some more danish into his mouth and pointed to the kitchen table. "By the way, that's for you."

Meredith picked up the small, pink gift bag and looked to Mark curiously. "What's this for?"

"Bridget went shopping with her sister yesterday. She got you something - said she couldn't resist," Mark said. "She asked me to give it to you today."

Meredith pulled out the white tissue paper and reached into the bag, smiling. "This is so cute," she all but gushed. She held up the tiny terrycloth bath robe with a duck face on the hood. "Derek, look."

"That's really cute," Derek grinned. "Tell Bridget we said thank you."

"We wanted to get one of these, but we couldn't find it in the newborn size. And now she has one," Meredith said happily, holding the outfit out in front of her to admire it. "I love it; thank you."

"Damn, Grey. Look at you. You're all... girly," Mark said, taking a sip of coffee from his mug.

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head. "I am not."

"Yes, you are," Derek chuckled. "It's adorable."

"Okay, well, savor my... adorableness," Meredith warned them both playfully. She tucked the robe back into the bag and set it on the table, then went back to pouring her cereal. "Because when I'm in labor, I won't be."

"Who's gonna be in the delivery room? Am I invited to witness the miracle of life?" Mark joked.

"Sadly, no. Only me and Derek. And my doctor, obviously. The last thing I want is a room full of people watching me deliver a baby," Meredith laughed. "Not even Cristina gets to see that. We're close but not _that_ close."

Mark considered this for a few seconds before speaking. "Oh, by the way, how close are you with Addie?"

"What? Why?" Meredith asked before shoveling a spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

"I was talking to her the other day. She asked how you guys were, and I told her about the baby," Mark said. "I assumed she knew already, but I guess not. Anyway, she asked me to send her congratulations."

Meredith smiled. "She did?"

"Yeah. She's really happy for you. I gave her your address; she wants to send you a gift," Mark told them. "Hope you don't mind."

"No, we don't," Derek replied as he reached for a bowl in the cabinet. "You told her we're having a girl?"

"Yeah," Mark said.

"That means we should probably expect a Gucci dress in the mail," Derek teased.

"It's sweet that she wants to send a gift," Meredith said, running her hand over her belly. "And that, you know, she doesn't hate me."

Derek poured some Muesli into his cereal bowl and Meredith slid the milk across the counter for him. "Why would she hate you?" he asked.

"Do I really need to regale you with the whole story?" she giggled. "Seriously though, I appreciate it. It's very thoughtful."

"Did you invite her to the baby shower? Derek asked sarcastically. "Or are you waiting for Izzie to sign off on it?"

"No, I didn't. Thought that might be a bit much," Mark said. "Oh, and she said Halloran is one of the best. You guys are lucky to have snagged her."

"You discussed Mer's OB/GYN?" Derek chuckled. "Nice to know nothing is off limits."

"Hey, she wanted to make sure you guys got someone good. She was looking out for you. Shame she moved. She could've been your OB," Mark said as a grin spread over his face.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Oh, yeah. Because my husband's ex-wife examining my nether regions wouldn't be awkward or anything."

"Okay. New subject," Derek prompted, halting his hands in front of him. "This conversation is officially encroaching on creepy territory."

"I agree," Meredith said, dumping her soggy cereal into the sink and replacing it with a fresh handful. "So do you two think you'll be able to finish painting today?"

"It's only a nursery. Aren't those usually small?" Mark asked.

"One of the perks of building our own house is making big bedrooms," Derek said, gloating in jest. "This is a top quality nursery. But yeah, we'll finish today."

"Alright, let's get started then. Knicks game is on at seven, and I thought I'd hang out here and watch it," Mark said as he hopped off the stool and placed his coffee mug in the sink. "Bridget's doing wedding stuff with her sister and bridesmaids, so they're taking over the living room."

"That's fine," Meredith said. "Baby clothes are taking over our living room. I'm tackling that project today since I'm apparently not allowed to help paint..." she teased, making sure Derek caught the smirk on her face.

Derek laughed. "It's not good for you to be breathing in paint fumes. Or to be climbing ladders," he reminded her as the three of them exited the kitchen. "Forgive me for wanting to protect my pregnant wife."

"That's okay." Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "You can make it up to me later on."

"I can do that," Derek grinned, running his hand over the small of her back.

"Okay," Meredith giggled, pulling her snug-fitting camisole over her belly. "I'll just be down here folding clothes with Ben and Jerry."

"You'd rather spend time with those two than with me," Derek teased.

"Just because Lilly and I have a thing for Chunky Monkey doesn't mean we don't love you."

Mark leaned against the banister and glanced at his watch. "Tick tock... you two can save the banter for the bedroom."

"Fine," Meredith said. "Go. Have fun. And be careful not to drip any paint on the carpet. It's brand new," she warned them, thinking of how there'd be hell to pay if splotches of pink paint dripped onto the soft yellow carpeting they had put in a few weeks ago.

After the two of them went upstairs to get started, Meredith continued with her own project. Baby clothes. Washing, drying, sorting, folding. They hadn't even had the baby shower yet, and already, there were mountains of clothes everywhere. Socks, onesies, dresses, baby jeans, tee shirts, booties, bibs, and more. Once settled on the couch with her latest fresh laundry load and her pint of Chunky Monkey, Meredith's cell phone rang and she reached for it, a purple onesie draped over her stomach.

"Hello?"

Cristina's voice came through on the other end. "Hey. It's me."

"Hey," Meredith returned. "Are you home?"

"Yeah. Bored out of my mind. I'm probably going to head to the hospital to troll for surgeries. You in?" Cristina asked.

"If you'd asked me that a few months ago, I'd say yes. But my feet hurt today. I swear, I'm going to start waddling soon," Meredith sighed.

Cristina stifled a laugh. "Yeah, well, you're the one who got herself knocked up," she said jokingly. "So that's a no?"

"No, I'm good just sitting on my ass, being lazy," she said, spooning ice cream into her mouth. "If you want, you could come over here."

"What're you doing?" Cristina asked.

"Folding baby clothes and watching bad Lifetime movies. Fun times." Meredith finished folding the onesie and placed it on top of a growing stack of them next to her on the couch. "Derek and Mark are painting, so I have nothing to do."

"Tempting, but I'll pass," Cristina laughed.

Meredith shrugged. "You're missing out."

Cristina heard Meredith glomping on something over the phone and smirked. "More Chunky Monkey?" she assumed.

"Yes," Meredith said before swallowing. "Lilly likes it, which is good, because I don't know what I'd do if she didn't. Derek brought home Cherry Garcia one time, and my stomach was not happy."

Cristina shuddered. "Makes me glad I don't want kids."

"You say that now. But one look at my baby, and you'll change your mind," Meredith said assuredly.

"Oh, I'm gonna be a kickass aunt. I'll have her suturing bananas by the time she's in kindergarten. But I have no intentions of being a mommy, or pushing a kid out of my body," Cristina maintained.

"Clearly, you've never had pregnancy sex," Meredith smirked, smoothing a yellow sundress over her belly then neatly folding it. "Seriously, one of the reasons I want another one is for the sex."

"That good?"

Meredith leaned back against the couch cushion and smiled. "Yes."

"Okay, on that note, I think I'll hang up now," Cristina laughed. "Last chance: you're sure you don't wanna troll with me?"

"I'm sure," Meredith said. "If you get anything good, let me know."

"Okay," Cristina promised. "Have fun with your housewifery."

Meredith shoveled another scoop of ice cream into her mouth. "Oh, I will."

...

Upstairs in the nursery, Derek and Mark laid the plastic tarp down over the carpet, making sure it stretched all the way into the corners, covering every inch of rug so no paint could accidentally splash onto it, which would surely result in Meredith's wrath.

Mark picked up the paint can and read the label on the lid. "Sexy pink? Really?"

"Mer and I like it," Derek chuckled. "It's a really nice color."

Mark wedged off the lid with a screwdriver and poured some into the paint tray, nodding in agreement when the pink liquid poured out. "Pretty."

"Told you," Derek said. He assembled two roller brushes and handed one to Mark. "It's good for a little girl's room."

"I still can't believe you're gonna be a dad," Mark said, shaking his head. "Getting old, man."

"We're the same age," Derek reminded him as he rolled his brush through the paint tray. He tapped off the excess, then pressed the brush to the wall, rolling it up and down in even strokes. As soon as the pink paint covered over the white walls, his heart jumped in his chest. No longer a blank canvas, or a room they'd built nearly two years ago for a one-day-down-the-line baby they'd have. But for his daughter's nursery. "Mer's gonna love this."

"Queen Meredith of the Darkside really picked this? I don't know if I believe that..." Mark grinned.

Derek laughed. "A few years ago, I wouldn't have either. She's even nesting now. You should see my office at work. She bought me a potted plant, and she organized my desk drawers."

"Damn," Mark said. "We should get video footage of that."

"Yes, we should," Derek agreed.

"So is the sex really as good as they say it is?" Mark asked conversationally, starting on the adjacent wall with his own roller.

"Mark."

Mark rolled his eyes. "Oh, like Grey doesn't dispense sex details to Yang and Stevens."

"I know she does. I just choose to block that out," Derek said. "But if you must know, then yes. It is."

"How do you guys, you know... do it? With the belly in the way?" Mark asked.

Derek glanced over at his friend in amusement. "Are you seriously asking me that question?"

"Medically speaking," Mark modified. "How do you have... intercourse?"

"Oh my God," Derek said in disbelief.

Mark shrugged. "Fine. Don't tell me. I just thought that as your best friend, we could talk about stuff like this."

"Use your imagination," Derek told him.

"She's on top?" Mark guessed, grinning. "Quite the view, huh?"

"We're standing in the room where my sweet, innocent daughter is going to sleep. Every time I walk in here, I'd rather not think of this conversation," Derek chuckled. "Please, can we find a new topic?"

...

"This is hazardous," Meredith pointed out as Derek led her down the hallway, his hands over her eyes. Six hours and two coats of paint later, he and Mark were finally finished the nursery, and Derek didn't want her to see it until she was standing in the center of the room.

"Almost there," Derek said. He gestured for Mark step aside so he and Meredith could enter, and he smiled at the back of Meredith's head. "Okay, you can look now."

Meredith opened her eyes, and the second she saw the nursery, she smiled. "I love this," she said, taking in the cheerful, pink color on the walls, and the clean, crisp white they'd painted the windows, baseboards, and closet doors. Against her will, annoying tears filled her eyes and blurred her vision of the room. "Damn hormones. But yeah, I love this," she giggled, swatting them away.

Derek wrapped his arms around her from behind and kissed her neck. "Me, too," he hummed against her skin. "I think Lilly will be very happy with our color choice."

"I think so," Meredith whispered, leaning into her husband. "Thank you for helping, Mark."

"No problem," Mark said. "I only take cash."

Meredith smirked. "How about pizza? I already ordered it."

"That'll do," Mark agreed. He patted Derek's shoulder and smiled. "I'll be downstairs helping myself to your expensive beer," he told them.

Once they were alone, Meredith spun around in Derek's embrace, pressing her lips to his. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Derek said softly. "Feels more real now, doesn't it?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "It does. And it'll be even weirder when we have all of her stuff set up. Her crib and blankets, and the changing table stacked with diapers."

Derek grinned at the thought. "A few more weeks until she's here."

The sound of the doorbell chiming from downstairs broke through their short-lived moment of quietness, and Meredith pulled back from his embrace. "Pizza's here."

"What kind did you get?" Derek asked.

"Pepperoni and sausage on one. Hawaiian on the other," Meredith said.

"You really love that, huh?" he chuckled as they walked toward the stairs.

"Hawaiian pizza and Chunky Monkey, Derek. That's all it takes to make me happy. Oh, and sex," she said, placing a protective hand over her belly as they descended the stairs and into the foyer where Mark was greeting the pizza guy.

Derek went to reach for his wallet from its usual spot in his back pocket, but when he remembered he was wearing his sweats, he glanced at Mark. "I'll pay you back?"

"Fine." Mark pulled a twenty from his wallet, and a few one dollar bills for a tip, and accepted the two boxes from the college-aged delivery guy. "Thanks," he said with a wave, then closed the door.

"Thank you, Mark," Meredith said, walking ahead of them to clear off the coffee table which was currently strewn with baby clothes. "Can you get plates and drinks, Derek?"

"Yeah." Derek headed off to the kitchen and Mark stood in the archway of the living room, his eyes scanning over Baby Palooza.

"Damn," he murmured. "She's got quite the wardrobe, huh?"

Meredith laughed as she scooped up her piles of unfolded laundry and dropped them into a nearby basket. "I think she has more clothes than Derek and I combined."

Mark picked up a tiny orange baby bikini still on the hanger from the couch and eyed it curiously. "What is this?"

"A bikini. Izzie spotted it a few days ago when she was birthday shopping for Alex, and she bought it for us. Well, for Lilly. It's newborn to three months in size, so she should be able to wear it during the summer," Meredith said, smiling. "Isn't it cute?"

"I didn't even know they made clothes this small," Mark said.

Derek couldn't help but chuckle when he saw Mark holding up the tiny bikini in amazement. "Yeah, I don't know about that outfit..." he said as he set the plates and drinks down on the coffee table that Meredith had cleared off.

Meredith waved in dismissal of their comments. "Oh, relax. It's adorable. It even has little frills on the butt."

"You won't think it's so cute when she's sixteen," Mark pointed out, plopping down on the couch with a slice of pizza in his hand.

"I guess I'd rather her wear that now than when she's older," Derek shrugged as he turned on the basketball game.

Meredith took a slice of Hawaiian pizza from the box, and picked up the bottle of water Derek got for her, then settled onto the other couch. "It's not like she's gonna have cleavage. You know, other than baby fat."

Derek grabbed his own piece of pizza and sat down next to his wife, lifting her legs so they draped comfortably over his lap. "She'll look beautiful no matter what outfit she's in, even if it's a onesie covered in bodily excretions," he chuckled.

"You two are strange," Mark commented before taking a swig of the expensive imported beer he'd swiped from the fridge.

Meredith licked some sauce off her finger, smiling. "Yeah, we know."

"Although, I've gotta hand it to you, Grey. You were voted the top MILF of Seattle Grace," he attempted to compliment.

Derek nearly choked on his beer. "Can I ask whom you polled for this?"

"Hospital-wide," Mark said, raising his beer in the air. "Congrats."

Meredith laughed. "Thank you; I'm flattered."


	92. She Looks Like Us

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**Thanks for the feedback, everyone. I really appreciate it. Based on your opinions, I'll most likely be continuing this beyond the birth, as long as there's still interest in it.  
**

The clock on Derek's desk told him it was just after two in the morning, and he knew that being on call, his pager could go off at any second, so he should really be taking advantage of the silence and getting some sleep in their cozy pullout bed in his office. Except it wasn't silent. Meredith was lying next to him, fast asleep, but she was making noises. They started off as happy sounding sighs, but had gotten progressively more... sexy. Sighs, and pants, and moans, and now she was rolling around under the covers, which was no easy task with her ever-expanding belly getting in the way of everything.

He hesitated for a few minutes before waking her. It didn't sound like she was in pain, but he couldn't be absolutely sure that she was okay until he woke her up. Derek placed a tentative hand on her shoulder and shook her gently. "Mer," he whispered. "Meredith, wake up. You okay?"

"Mmm," Meredith moaned, licking her lips. "Derek..."

"Meredith," he said again, a little louder this time.

Her eyes opened and she laid there for a few seconds, as if trying to piece everything together into coherence. "Hmm, what?" Meredith croaked, her voice raspy and full of sleep.

"You were making noises," Derek told her.

"Noises?"

"Yeah. Like... moaning and stuff. You're not in any pain, right?" Derek asked, splaying his palm over her belly.

Meredith blinked a few times as her brain finally began to cooperate, and then she blushed. "Oh. Oh, God. It happened again?"

"What?"

"A sex dream. I had one a few days ago, too," Meredith said, arching her back uncomfortably as she rolled onto her side.

Derek slipped a pillow under her stomach so her skin didn't pull from the gravity of it, and smiled. "A sex dream, huh?"

"Mmhmm," Meredith murmured, burying her face into the pillow under her head. "But you interrupted it."

"Want me to make it up to you?" he asked, though there was a voice in his head that advised him to forgo sex for the time being and sleep, or they'd regret it in the morning. But still, Meredith moaning in her sleep had admittedly turned him on, even when he was half asleep in the middle of the night.

Meredith opened one eye and looked at him. "Now?"

"We can wait." Derek kissed her forehead and smoothed some hair off her face. "Let's sleep."

He'd only closed his eyes for a nanosecond when Meredith slipped her hand into his scrub pants and stroked him. Derek sucked in a breath. "What're you doing?"

"Trying to have sex. You woke me up right when I was about to cross the finish line. And now I can't fall back to sleep until I get the orgasm you just deprived me of," Meredith said as she continued her ministrations.

Derek swallowed thickly and moaned. "Okay," he choked out. He regretfully pulled her hand from his pants, afraid that if she kept doing what she was doing, something embarrassing would happen.

They undressed quickly, well aware that on-call sex often got interrupted by pagers going off. Long love making sessions rarely happened within the four walls of the hospital, and over the years, they'd come to expect it. Meredith bit her lip as Derek shed his boxers, leaving them both naked and on display for each other's eyes.

"Do you want to be on top?" Derek asked. Sex was still frequent, even now that Meredith was thirty-two weeks pregnant; it just required more maneuvering than before. "Or we can try me on top, but I don't know."

"We can, um... the spooning thing," Meredith said. "Remember? From the book? The spooning thing?"

Derek grinned, all traces of tiredness gone from both of them. "That's a new one."

"We're quick learners," she smiled at him, her hands gripping his shoulders as she leaned in and kissed her husband. Once their daughter was born, they'd be up in the middle of the night, but for entirely different reasons. From sporadic three AM sex, to crying and dirty diapers, so they decided to make the next eight weeks count.

And it was glorious.

Except when the alarm blared at six in the morning. Derek shut it off with a groan, and pulled Meredith's still naked body into his arms, neither of them having the energy to get dressed after their pre-dawn romp earlier that morning. "No no no," Meredith said into her pillow. "Not yet."

"Five more minutes," Derek yawned.

"We have rounds. And a sonogram at nine," she reminded him, but still making no attempt to get up. Until Derek got out of their warm, soft cocoon, she was staying put. "You have no idea how lucky you are that you get coffee."

"Sorry," Derek said, kissing the back of her head.

"Hmm," Meredith hummed. "'S okay, I guess."

After a few more moments of blissful morning quiet, Derek disentangled himself from her and sat up. "Rise and shine," he yawned, rubbing his eyes before standing up to redress.

Meredith pulled his pillow over her head and breathed in his scent. Woodsy and fresh and comforting, the Derek-y smell that helped identify him. "You go; I'll stay here."

"I would be fine with that, except you're the pregnant one. I can't have the ultrasound for you," Derek chuckled. He slipped his scrub shirt over his head, then leaned over the bed, slowly peeling the pillow away from Meredith's face. "How about I go get you a hot chocolate and a bagel from the breakfast cart, then meet you back up here in ten minutes... give you a chance to wake up a bit," he offered.

After he kissed her, Meredith scrunched her nose. "Okay, but brush your teeth first. Your morning breath is not attractive right now."

Derek laughed. "Okay."

By the time he returned with her breakfast, Meredith was finally dressed and combing out her hair with the brush she kept in Derek's desk drawer, which was progress, considering she'd almost fallen asleep brushing her own teeth a few minutes ago in the attending lounge down the hall. She smiled when he entered. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Derek said, setting down their food and drinks on his desk where she was seated while he folded their bed back into the couch. Though he knew it was a touchy subject, he knew it would probably be brought up at their appointment today, so Derek decided to dive in. "So, if Dr. Halloran asks you about maternity leave today, what're you gonna say?" he asked gently.

Meredith smirked at him. "I knew you were going to bring that up," she said, spreading cream cheese over her cinnamon raisin bagel with the plastic knife. "I have eight weeks to go still."

"Yes, but she's not going to clear you for work at forty weeks," Derek chuckled, tossing the throw pillows back onto the couch.

"I know," she sighed. "Stupid HR policies..."

"Which are for your own health," Derek added. He leaned against his desk and took a sip of his coffee. "Maybe you could stop a month from now? Thirty-six weeks? That way you could take the whole ninth month off," he suggested.

Meredith bit into her bagel and nodded. "If that's what's best for Lilly, that's what I'm going to do," she agreed.

"Okay," Derek smiled, glancing at his watch. "Ready?"

"Yeah." Meredith hoisted herself up out of Derek's desk chair and groaned. "Eight more weeks and I already feel like I'm housing a watermelon."

Derek kissed her temple and laughed. "She's not a blueberry anymore."

"No, definitely not," Meredith said as she gathered her breakfast into her arms with the intention of finishing it before they rounded. "She'll probably be a nine pounder like you. And then guess what?"

"No more sex, ever?" Derek guessed, holding the door open for her.

Meredith smiled. "See? Quick learner."

...

After rounds and two brain biopsies, they barely made it to the OB wing for their appointment on time. Derek quickly signed them in on the chart just as the hour hand hit nine on the clock. "Made it," he sighed, dropping down next to Meredith in a waiting room chair.

"I could already use a nap," Meredith joked, leaning back in her chair and closing her eyes.

Derek smiled sympathetically at his wife as he trailed his hand along her arm. He knew how grueling residency was, but being pregnant in the midst of all the hustle and bustle made it even harder. Which is why he was grateful that she was willing to take her maternity leave in a few weeks, and not stick it out until week forty. That would do her no good. "If you want, I could get another resident to scrub in with me this afternoon. You can rest if you want to," he offered.

"No, I'm good. I want to log as much OR time as I can so I don't fall that far behind the others. Maternity leave is already going to keep me from finishing residency on time," Meredith said, shrugging. "But that's okay."

"Not necessarily," Derek argued. "You can always log neuro hours with Nelson while I'm home with Lilly. We can make it work."

"We'll see," Meredith replied. "If I have to sacrifice one, I'd rather it be work. Lilly comes first."

Derek squeezed her hand and smiled at her. She was already so different from her own mother, and their baby wasn't even born yet. Even if she never gave herself enough credit, he was proud of her. "Okay."

"Meredith," Dr. Halloran called from the doorway leading to the patient rooms. "You can come on back now."

The two followed the obstetrician back into an exam room, and Derek took her hand as she hopped up onto the table. "So, thirty-two weeks now. How are you doing?" Dr. Halloran asked as she took the blood pressure cuff and wrapped it around Meredith's arm.

"Good. Really good," Meredith replied.

"Good," the doctor echoed. "115 over 75 for your blood pressure, which is normal, too." She documented it in Meredith's chart then looked up at her. "No spotting or cramping, right?"

Meredith shook her head. "Nope, none."

"Any pain or bleeding during or after sex?" she asked.

"No. We're... definitely good in that area," Meredith said, glancing over at Derek whose face was turning red at her admission, especially given this morning's new position discovery.

"Okay, very good," Dr. Halloran laughed. "And how about the baby? Do you still feel her frequently?"

Meredith smiled. "All the time. Lots of kicking."

"Excellent," she replied, writing the information down. "Normally between thirty-two and thirty-three weeks is when babies peak in movement. After that, they're officially starting to run out of room, so you won't feel her kicking as much. You'll still know when she's moving around, but in the fetal position, she's basically hugging herself in the womb to save space," Dr. Halloran explained.

"Okay," Meredith replied, as she and Derek both took mental notes. All of this was information they'd learned back in med. school, but it was nice to have these refresher courses with each appointment, filing away every tidbit of knowledge they could.

Dr. Halloran set Meredith's chart down on the countertop. "Could you lie back for me? I just want to feel her, make sure she's where she should be," the doctor requested.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, letting go of Derek's hand as Dr. Halloran reclined the exam table and extended the foot rest to make Meredith more comfortable. She lifted up her scrub top and tucked it just below her bra.

Dr. Halloran palpated Meredith's abdomen, feeling the position of the baby with her fingers. "Her butt is over here, and then her back... feet just below your ribs." She moved her fingers lower toward Meredith's pubic bone and pressed down gently. "And her head is down, which is good. She's right on track. So unless she decides to do any fancy acrobatics and shifts her body around, you should be absolutely fine for a vaginal delivery."

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief, glad that Lilly was cooperating. "Okay, good."

"We can get started on the ultrasound now," Dr. Halloran said as she began to turn on the monitor. "We can get some measurements, see how she's doing in there." She squirt some blue gel over Meredith's stomach and spread it out with the wand. The 4-d video flashed over the computer screen, and they both smiled when they saw their daughter.

"She's so big," Derek said softly, a grin coming over his face that reached his eyes.

"Yep. She's around four pounds now," Dr. Halloran said as she clicked the mouse to take a measurement of the baby's height. "She looks to be about... seventeen inches."

"Seventeen?" Meredith gasped. "I was eighteen inches when I was born. So she's almost done growing height-wise, right?"

Dr. Halloran nodded. "Most babies are between eighteen and twenty-two inches long, so she's not going to be growing that much more. But she'll keep gaining weight until delivery. Sometimes genetics tie into this, as well. Do either of you know how much you weighed at birth?"

"I was a few weeks early, so I was around five. And Derek was almost nine," Meredith said.

"Well, by that average, she should be about seven pounds. But she looks petite to me. I'm guessing she'll be around six, which is good news for you. Obviously larger babies increase the chances of C-sections or episiotomies, but I won't scare you with that," Dr. Halloran said, laughing. "You're young, healthy, and fit. I think you'll be just fine."

"I hope so," Meredith sighed amusedly. She focused her eyes on the screen and smiled at her daughter. "So, she looks good then, right?"

"Definitely," Dr. Halloran nodded. "Developmentally right on track." She zoomed in on Lilly's face and traced her finger of the baby's features. "Eyes, nose, lips. See how she's blinking?"

"She blinks," Meredith giggled, her eyes stinging with tears. "Holy crap. Derek, look at her face."

Derek wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. "I know. She looks like you, Mer. Her nose and her lips are just like yours."

"Your chin," Meredith pointed out. "Definitely your chin."

Lilly tucked her foot under her chin and Meredith smiled some more. "And your feet..."

"My feet?" he chuckled.

"Her foot is arched. I have flat feet. So yes, she has your feet," Meredith said, letting out a breath. "She looks like us. How crazy is that?"

"Genetically speaking, not that much of a stretch," Derek winked, teasing her.

Meredith smacked his arm lightly with her hand. "You know what I mean."

Dr. Halloran laughed, then pointed to Lilly's hand as it waved over the screen. "She has fingernails and toenails, too. And not just peach fuzz on top of her head anymore. She has real hair now. It's tough to see hair on ultrasounds, but by now, she definitely has it."

"She'll have his hair," Meredith said assuredly. "Every Shepherd has that hair."

"She seems to be a good mix of both of you," Dr. Halloran smiled. She set the wand down on the cart and began wiping the gel off Meredith's belly. "Everything looks great. You're healthy. Baby is healthy. You really couldn't ask for a better pregnancy."

With Derek's help, Meredith sat up on the table and smoothed her scrub shirt over her stomach, then smiled at her doctor. "I'm relieved. Especially that she's not transverse or breech. I want to avoid a C-section at all costs. I hear the recovery is hell."

"It's major abdominal surgery," Dr. Halloran concurred, printing out a stack of ultrasound pictures for them, and loading the footage onto a video. "Unless it's absolutely necessary, I always encourage my patients to opt for vaginal delivery. And like I said, barring any complications, I think you'll be good to go."

"Good," Meredith said softly.

"So," Dr. Halloran began, "have you given any thought to maternity leave?"

"Yeah. I think I want to stop once I hit thirty-six weeks. I know I could probably push it to thirty-seven, but if it's safer for both of us, I want to do what's best," Meredith said, trailing a hand over her belly.

"I was going to advise thirty-six weeks, especially for a job like this, when so much time is spent on your feet. All of the walking around and standing for long hours could result in premature labor because of all that pressure from the baby on your cervix. So we definitely want to avoid that. And by that point, most women are ready to stop. Your body is preparing for birth, so resting is the best thing for you," Dr. Halloran said wisely.

"That's what I'll do then," Meredith agreed. "And Derek can wait on me hand and foot."

Dr. Halloran laughed, handing Meredith the photos and the video. "That sounds like a good plan to me."

...

"She's the cutest baby I've ever seen," Izzie gushed as Meredith and her friends sat at their lunch table, ultrasound pictures being passed around. "Look at her tiny fingers!"

"Yeah," Meredith giggled. "She's pretty awesome."

Alex sipped soda through his straw when Cristina passed him a picture, and he smiled. "She kinda looks like you - like a blobby, baby version."

"She does. It's creepy," Cristina agreed, taking a bite of her tuna salad.

"Don't listen to them, Mer. She's beautiful," George said.

"Thank you, George," Meredith replied, patting his arm. Just as she was about to bite into her sandwich, she felt a swift kick in her ribs that nearly took her breath away in surprise. "Oh!" she gasped, massaging her hand over her belly. "Lilly, those are my ribs. I know they're in your way. Just... gentler, please."

The four others at the lunch table stared at her. "Does she really kick that hard?" Izzie asked.

"Yes," Meredith answered. "It doesn't hurt, but she's... powerful. Especially when I'm not expecting it. Wanna feel?"

"Me first!" George said, tossing his fork onto his plate.

Meredith took his hand and placed on her belly, right below her ribcage. "She's moving right now. Feel her?"

"Are those her feet?" George asked excitedly. "Iz, feel," he instructed, taking Izzie's hand and replacing his with hers.

"Yep, those are her feet, which are arched, by the way. She has Derek's feet," Meredith said proudly, leaning back in her chair while her friends touched her scrub covered belly. "Oh, and his chin. See?" She picked up a picture of the baby's face from the table and showed it off to them.

"Damn, she does," Cristina said. "Wait, but now that you know what she looks like, doesn't that take the fun out of the whole stupid, magical birth part you two get so gooey over?"

"No," Meredith laughed. "We can't wait to see her for the first time."

Cristina looked over at her. "Even when she's all covered in blood and goo?"

"Of course," Meredith said, smiling as Lilly continued to move around, something she seemed to do a lot of while Meredith ate, following by a sleepy period for a few hours after her stomach was full. Every move of Lilly's still fascinated her, and they felt comfortably in sync. "She's our baby."

"What if one of us is assigned to OB that day? Well, not me. But one of them..." she said, motioning to the other three with her spoon.

Meredith peeled off the lid to her pudding cup and giggled. "Ideally, Derek would be the one delivering the baby, so no one else would see me... down there. But since he's a neurosurgeon and not an obstetrician, that's not happening. I'm not adding salt to the wound by having one of you guys in the room. I love you all, but... no."

"Well, if you need an extra birthing coach, I'm available," Izzie offered eagerly.

Meredith just smiled. "Okay, I'll keep that in mind."

...

"Can you get the Raisinets, Der?" Meredith called into the kitchen, a bowl of popcorn balanced on her belly as she set up the DVD with the remote. It was only 7:30, and to be home from work, showered, and settled in so early was rare, so they decided to put the time to good use. "Oh, and more of that peach juice, please?" she requested.

"Coming right up," Derek replied.

Meredith smiled. As far as husbands go, she'd gotten pretty damn lucky. "Thank you."

Derek walked into the living room with two glasses and the box of candy, and dropped down next to her on the couch. "Need anything else before we start?" he asked.

"No, I'm good." She snuggled into him and yawned. "But thank you. I know I'm a pregnant pain in the ass," Meredith giggled.

"You're not a pregnant pain in the ass," he assured her, chuckling. "Lilly relies on you, so I want you to rely on me."

She leaned into him and kissed him. "Love you."

"I love you, too," he whispered.

"Ready for the movie?" Meredith asked, ripping open the yellow candy box and dumping some Raisinets into the popcorn bowl.

Derek picked up the remote from the top of the blanket that covered them and hit the play button. "Yep. Sure you don't need to pee first?"

"No," Meredith smirked. "I just went a few minutes ago. I should be good for the next half hour or so."

"Okay," Derek replied, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "Just checking."

Midway into the film, Meredith was in the middle of crunching on some popcorn when the bowl that was still conveniently sitting on her belly wobbled a little bit upward. It happened again a few seconds later, and she looked down it. "What?" she asked. "Der, pause it."

Derek pressed pause and looked over at her. "Everything okay?"

"I... look," Meredith said, gasping slightly when the popcorn bowl bounced again. Realization hit her and she smiled. "I think she has the hiccups."

"Yeah?" he removed the popcorn bowl and lifted her shirt up, hoping he could see it through her belly. Lilly hiccupped again and he laughed, spreading his hand over her skin. "Oh my God."

"It's probably from all the popcorn. I read that somewhere," Meredith said excitedly. She put her hand next to his and they waited. "Holy crap!"

"What does it feel like?" Derek asked.

Meredith felt it happen again and she laughed. "Kind of like gas bubbles. Mommy's sorry, Lilly. Hiccups suck," she said. "I wish I knew how to get rid of them for her."

"But it's so cool," Derek couldn't help but point out. "Just a few more minutes."

"Mean father," she teased, but still leaned back on the couch, her hand planted next to his. "Pregnancy is so weird. It's things like this that make me realize I'm sharing my body with someone. We made this tiny person who gets the hiccups and kicks me."

"It's incredible," Derek whispered. He kissed her belly and grinned, trying to soak in these last few weeks of pregnancy. He knew that he'd be holding Lilly in his arms before he knew it, and two blinks later, she'd be going off to college. "She's still inside you, and she's fascinating. I can't imagine what it'll be like when she walks and talks and tells us that she loves us."

Meredith sniffled. Damn hormones, getting the best of her once again. "Stop; you're gonna make me cry."

"Too late," Derek chuckled. "Wanna try eating some peanut butter? I remember my sisters doing that. It's an old wives tale, but apparently, it works," he suggested.

"Yeah, I'll try it," Meredith replied. "This is one of the coolest things she's ever done, but I want her to be comfy so she can sleep in there. Otherwise, she'll be kicking me all night," she yawned. "And Mommy has a big surgery-filled day tomorrow, so I need to sleep."

Derek got up off the couch and went into the kitchen, returning seconds later with the jar of peanut butter and a spoon. "Here you go."

"Thank you." Meredith took a spoonful and put it in her mouth, moaning. "Mmm, God I love peanut butter. Peanut butter and popcorn would be so good together..."

"You're adorable," Derek grinned, kissing her temple.

"Am not," Meredith replied, peanut butter sticking to the roof of her mouth. She rested her head on his shoulder and ate another heaping spoonful. "This is going to make me so constipated, but it's so freaking worth it."

"Wow," Derek replied, nothing short of amused at her disclosure. "Nothing is off limits anymore, is it?"

Meredith shrugged. "We made a baby together. You've seen everything. And you're going to watch me give birth," she said, dropping a few pieces of popcorn and several Raisinets onto her peanut butter spoon. "If that's not closeness, I don't know what is."

Derek hugged her closer to him and kissed her cheek, laughing against her skin. "Good point."


	93. Getting Closer

**Disclaimer: It's still not mine.**

**As always, thanks for your patience. This has been the worst semester ever, but it's almost over, and I plan on writing a lot over my winter break. So hopefully that means more updates. Enjoy this one! :)  
**

Derek was trying to be a good husband, he really was. But lately, it seemed like everything he did pissed Meredith off. She was feeling large and tired and stressed, and was only one more week away from maternity leave. And though she'd never admit it, he knew she needed it. Twelve hour shifts, standing for hours on end in the OR, and running back and forth around the hospital was starting to take its toll. She was soldiering through, but by the end of the day, she was exhausted.

He heard her open the front door and shut it harder than was necessary. Seconds later, Meredith bounded into the kitchen, making a beeline for the fridge. "I hate Hunt," she said bluntly.

"What? Why?" Derek asked, lowering the flame under the sauce he had simmering in the pot.

She pulled out a pudding cup from the fridge, then slammed that door shut, too. "He made me scrub out on the esophagectomy."

"He wouldn't do that unless he had a reason to," Derek rationalized, though he knew it was probably a stupid move. "What happened?"

"My back started hurting during surgery, and I couldn't rub the spot because I was scrubbed in. So I was trying to stretch, thinking maybe that would get the kink out. And I guess he noticed, because he told me he thought it would be best if I scrubbed out and watched from the gallery," she said. "Can you get me a spoon?"

Derek got one from the utensil drawer and handed it to her. "Sounds like he was just looking out for you," he pointed out. Again, stupid.

Meredith glared at him. "Why are you defending him?"

"I'm just saying, Hunt knows you're pregnant. I doubt he did it to offend you. He cares, Mer. That's all," Derek said as casually as he could.

"I'm still pregnant and already, I'm being mommy tracked. Do you have any idea how frustrating that is?" Meredith asked. "And now my own husband is doing it, too."

"I'm not, I'm just..." Derek sighed. "I don't want to argue about this. I'm sorry you didn't get to do the surgery."

Meredith shook her head. "It's not about the surgery, Derek. It's about feeling... incompetent. Like I'm too fragile to do my job. I only have nine days left to bank as many OR hours as I can before I go on maternity leave, which is probably stupid anyway, because I could spend twenty-four hours a day in the OR, and I'm still going to fall behind everyone else."

A light bulb blinked on in Derek's mind, and he treaded water lightly, pursing his lips together in thought before he spoke. "Is that why you're upset? Because your friends will be a few weeks ahead in residency? Mer, that's not a big deal. Three of my sisters had kids during their residencies, and they still finished in time," Derek said. "It can be done. I don't want you to worry about that."

She slammed her pudding cup down on the counter in disbelief. "Comparing me to your perfect sisters isn't going to make me feel better."

"What will make you feel better?" he asked. "What can I do?"

"I don't know," Meredith replied, scraping the last bites of pudding from the plastic cup and putting the spoon in her mouth. "I just want to take a shower and go to bed."

"I'm making dinner," Derek said. "Chicken parm., your favorite."

Meredith dropped her spoon into the sink and pudding cup into the trash. "I'm full."

Rather than push the issue, Derek said nothing when she turned around and went upstairs. When Meredith was stressed, she took it out on him. He knew it was just exhaustion and hormones getting the best of her, so he tried to give her space. After she had some downtime from work, he would talk to her. So instead, he made dinner, melting cheese on top of the chicken, and drowning it in sauce the way she liked, then he cooked the spaghetti. Because there was no way in hell that pudding cup was enough.

A few minutes after the shower turned off, Derek set everything in the oven to stay warm, then he went upstairs, bracing himself for more ranting, but hoping for the best. He knocked on the bedroom door. "Mer?"

"You can come in," she called out from the other side.

Derek turned the knob and entered, smiling in relief when he saw that she was watching TV in bed, and not sticking pins in a voodoo doll of Owen Hunt, or even himself. "Hey."

"Hey," Meredith yawned, muting the TV.

"You okay?" he asked. "If you want me to leave you alone, I will. I just... are you okay?"

Meredith patted his side of the bed, and Derek took that as an invitation. As soon as he dropped down next to her, he pulled her close to him. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to apologize for," she whispered, resting her head on his chest.

"I don't want you to ever think you're not good enough. You're an incredible surgeon. And you're going to be an incredible mother. And I promise that you can be both of those things."

"I'm nervous," Meredith admitted softly, looking up at him.

"About what?" he asked.

He reached for his pillow and put it under her belly to make her more comfortable, and she draped her arm over his torso. "I don't know. Everything. I'm thrilled and excited and can't wait to meet her, but I'm scared, too. I'm scared that I'll turn into my mother." Meredith shook her head. "I can't do that to Lilly."

"We'd never do that. She's our baby. The second we saw that plus sign on the pregnancy test, that was it. We committed our lives to her, no questions asked, unconditionally. And that's never going to change. If I need to be a stay at home dad, I'll do it. I'll do anything for her. And you."

She laughed.

"What?"

"Nothing, I'm just picturing you in a frilly, pink apron," Meredith said. "It amuses me."

"Hey, I'd do it. You're on your way to becoming a world class neurosurgeon. I could quit. You could bring home the bacon," Derek chuckled, kissing her temple. He paused. "I mean it though, Mer. We're going to make this work."

Meredith found his hand and squeezed it. "Okay."

"We started planning our lives around her before she even existed. We knew we were going to have kids, and we agreed a long time ago that they would be our number one priorities."

Lilly delivered a swift kick that even Derek could feel with her belly pressed into his side and his eyes went wide in surprise. "Wow, she's powerful," he said. "See? She agrees with me."

"I think she does," Meredith laughed. She hugged her husband close and breathed him in. "I don't mean to be a basket case. You know that, right?"

"I know," Derek said, waving it off. "You can yell at me all you want. I can take it."

"If I were you, I would've lost patience with me months ago," she giggled.

Derek kissed the top of her head and smiled into her hair, which still smelled the same way it did the night he met her. Lavender. Of all the things he associated with his wife, that was one that would always stick with him. "I shared a house with five women for almost twenty years, and four of those women thought their sole purpose on this planet was to drive me crazy. Living with you is a piece of cake."

"Hmm, well, you're pretty easy to live with, too," Meredith returned.

"Let's hope Lilly thinks that," Derek grinned, lifting up his Bowdoin tee shirt she was wearing and kissing her belly.

Meredith closed her eyes and smiled at the feeling of his lips on her skin. "For the first thirteen years, she'll like us. Then she'll roll her eyes at everything we say and call us lame."

"We'll be cool parents," Derek said. "Not 'keg party cool,' but... you know, cool. I always got along with my mom."

"That's because you're a boy. Boys always get along with their moms." Meredith paused. "And girls are usually close with their dads. Which means you'll be the cool one," she said, feigning bitterness. "Meanwhile, I'll be the one she fights with."

"Well, if the next one is a boy, we'll be even," he pointed out.

"Then they'll just fight with each other."

"Good. Then we can just stay out of it." Derek patted her leg. "Wanna go eat? You should probably eat something besides pudding for dinner."

"Shut up," she said, rolling her eyes playfully and reaching out her arms. "And help me up."

Derek pulled her up into a sitting position, smirking at her leopard print panties under the tee shirt. "Nice panties," he complimented.

"They make me feel young and thin and sexy. You know, instead of a tired, crazy, pregnant lady," Meredith said as they got up off the bed.

"You're still young and thin and sexy. Seattle Grace's top rated MILF, remember?" Derek chuckled, reminding her of what Mark had said.

She laughed. "Yeah. I'm still waiting for my trophy."

...

Meredith blinked up at the ceiling, trying to catch her breath as Derek kissed her neck. "Mmm, wow," she purred. "I needed that."

"We're going to be late for surgery," Derek said, though he wasn't making any attempt to get up either.

"Give me a minute. I can't feel my legs yet," Meredith sighed, closing her eyes. Derek trailed his fingers over her the sensitive skin of her breasts and she shivered. "And if you keep doing that, we'll be ready for round two... and we don't have time for a round two."

"Later then," Derek promised, kissing her temple.

"Definitely later," Meredith said, smiling. She took Derek's hand and sat up in their on-call room bed, regretfully reaching for her clothes. "So when we get home I thought we could-" She paused, her hands going to her belly.

"What? Mer, what is it?" he asked, his heart already racing inside his chest. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. My stomach just feels like it's tightening up or something. It's doesn't hurt, I promise. Probably just Braxton Hicks."

"Want to see if Dr. Halloran can fit us in, just to be safe? I'm sure you're fine, but..."

"Yeah, we can," she nodded, slowly exhaling when the feeling went away. "Can you call her?"

"Yeah." Derek pulled his shirt over his head and hopped back into his boxers in pants in record time, then scrambled to find his cell phone on his desk. Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Derek, relax. I'm fine," she assured him as she redressed.

Derek walked over to the bed and kissed her forehead. "Okay," he said softly. "Finish getting dressed; I'll go out in the hall and call her, okay?"

"'Kay," Meredith replied. As soon as the door closed behind Derek, she smiled down at her belly. "In case you haven't noticed, he's a little overprotective when it comes to us. But we're both fine, Lilly. I promise."

Just as she was slipping her shoes on, Derek walked back into the room. "She said she can see us now. There's probably nothing wrong, but she wants to make sure."

"What about the surgery?" Meredith asked.

Derek took her hand and helped her off the bed. "I called down to the nurses' station. They paged Nelson, and he's gonna take care of it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. This is more important."

"Okay," she responded. "Derek, everything's fine. You were married to an OB for eleven years. And you have four sisters. You know the drill."

"I know, but this is you," Derek said.

She smiled and squeezed his hand. "I know."

Within minutes, Meredith was wearing a paper gown in one of the OB exam rooms, Derek by her side. They both knew everything was probably fine, but with Lilly, they could never be too cautious.

"You gave Nelson a really good surgery," Meredith commented, resting her head on Derek's shoulder while they waited for Dr. Halloran to arrive.

Derek laughed. "Baby trumps surgery."

"Of course she does," Meredith agreed with him. "I'm just saying..."

"There'll be more," he said.

She sighed, swinging her feet back and forth. "I know."

Dr. Halloran knocked before entering, and smiled at both of them as soon as she stepped in the room. "How's it going? You think you might be having Braxton Hicks?" she asked as she began washing her hands.

"I think so," Meredith said. "From what I've read about them, that's what it felt like."

"No cramping feelings?"

Meredith shook her head. "No. It was like my muscles tightened up for a few seconds. I'm sure everything's okay, but we didn't want to take any chances."

"It sounds like Braxton Hicks to me, which is normal at this stage. You've probably been having them for a few weeks now, but just never noticed them before. Real labor would be painful and much more intense. I'm sure you're just fine," Dr. Halloran said comfortingly. "But let me just examine you, make sure your cervix is still closed."

"Okay," Meredith said.

"Do you have any idea what could've spurred on the Braxton Hicks?" Dr. Halloran asked as she situated Meredith for the exam.

As if her current position wasn't uncomfortable enough, Meredith felt her cheeks burn and she glanced up at Derek, whose face was the same color hers was. "Oh. I, um. Well, Derek and I were..." she stammered. "We just got done having..."

"Having sex?" Dr. Halloran guessed, laughing it off. "Don't be embarrassed. It's completely normal. And it probably explains the Braxton Hicks," she said as she examined Meredith.

"Is everything okay?" Derek asked, running his fingers over the back of Meredith's hand.

"Everything looks just fine," the doctor nodded. "Your cervix isn't dilating, but it does feel like the baby is laying low."

"When I stand up for a long time, I feel some cervical pressure. But other than that, I'm fine," Meredith answered. "But that's normal, right?"

Dr. Halloran nodded, patting Meredith's knee as a sign that she could sit up. "Absolutely. All of her weight is bearing down on your cervix, so it's only normal to feel pressure. But I assure you, you're not in labor. Everything is completely healthy," she told them.

"Good," Meredith breathed. "Good."

"Just Braxton Hicks, then?" Derek double checked.

"Yep, that's all. There's no way to predict them. You might have one again in an hour, or it might be days. They're uncomfortable, but they shouldn't hurt. If they do, that could be a sign of preterm labor, so make sure to call right away if you start feeling any pain," Dr. Halloran said, pulling off her gloves and tossing them into the trash.

Meredith laced her fingers through Derek's and nodded. "Okay."

"You're thirty-five weeks, right?" Dr. Halloran asked, flipping though Meredith's chart. "And you're scheduled for maternity leave starting next week?"

In the back of her mind, Meredith knew where this conversation was going, and she swallowed thickly. "Yes."

"If you want, I could clear you to start now. Of course, it's up to you. You can work until next week if you choose to. But because you are petite, and you're on your feet most of the day, it might just be more comfortable for you. Less strain on your feet, less pressure on your bladder and your cervix if you're able to sit," Dr. Halloran explained.

"Would that be safer for the baby?" Meredith asked, one hand resting on top of her belly.

Dr. Halloran shook her head. "You and the baby are completely safe if you work. Again, this is just for your benefit. Not because you're in any danger of early delivery or anything. Like I said, your cervix is completely closed, and the baby is in a good position."

"So far, I've been fine. Just the normal aches, swollen feet, always needing to pee. I think I'll be okay for a few more days," Meredith decided. "But if I start to feel like my body is telling me to stop, then I will. I promise."

"Fair enough," Dr. Halloran agreed, smiling. "You've had a great pregnancy, so as long as you feel up to it, I say go for it."

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's shoulder and audibly exhaled in relief. "First time parents... we'll be better next time around," he chuckled.

"It's no problem, really. Never hesitate to call," she said.

"Thank you," Meredith said softly, leaning into her husband. "We appreciate it."

...

"Jeez, how many times do you pee a day?" Mark asked, unscrewing the cap to his water bottle as Meredith rejoined him and Derek at the lunch table after a bathroom visit.

Meredith sighed amusedly before taking a bite of her tuna salad. "I don't know. Around the tenth trip, I stop counting."

"Feeling okay?" Derek asked her.

"Yeah. I feel good," Meredith said, smiling at him. "No more Braxton Hicks... yet."

"You've been having Braxton Hicks?" Mark asked.

"Earlier today, I had one right after we -" She stopped herself and shook her head in dismissal. "Yeah, I had one today."

"After you what?" Mark hinted. A grin came over his face in realization and he glanced from him to her. "Aah, after you did the dirty, huh?"

"Yes," Meredith admitted. "Anyway, we saw the doctor just to be sure, and she said everything's fine."

Mark bit into his apple and nodded. "Good. How's the kiddo?"

"She's good. Actually, she's very busy today," Meredith laughed as she felt the baby's feet kicking. "Wanna feel, Mark?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, come on," Derek encouraged. "It's incredible."

"Okay." Mark let his hand hover over Meredith's belly and she guided it to the spot below her ribs where Lilly was busily doing her workout, stretching her legs. When she kicked right into the palm of his hand, his eyes went wide in surprise. "Holy crap."

"Pretty good, right?" Derek said proudly.

"She's feisty," Mark said, keeping his hand in the spot where Meredith put it in case she kicked again. When she did, he laughed, fascinated by the tiny person inside. "Damn it."

"That's your niece," Meredith said, smiling. "She's kind of awesome, isn't she?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah, she is."

"Hey," Cristina said, dropping her tray down on the table. She pulled out a chair for herself and sat. "Where is everybody?"

"Alex, George, and Iz are all scrubbed in somewhere. Why aren't you scrubbed in?" Meredith asked.

Cristina groaned as she peeled back her yogurt lid. "I'm on call for the pit. Nothing's going on down there."

"You just jinxed that one, Yang," Derek said.

"One can only hope," Cristina sighed. "Wait, I thought I saw you two scrubbed in something now on the board."

"We were, but - ouch!" Meredith winced, laughing. "Lilly, what did I say about the rib kicks? We were, but then I started having Braxton Hicks, so I got checked out to make sure everything was okay."

"Braxton Hicks? That means you're like... due soon," Cristina said, as though it was the first time the thought ever crossed her mind. "How's she doing? Ready to pop out yet?"

"No, not yet. Just kicking a lot. And she's pressing against my cervix, just like she should be," Meredith disclosed freely.

"Wow. Good to know nothing is TMI," Mark laughed.

"With Mer? Never," Derek chuckled, eating a spoonful of his Ramen noodles. "Only five weeks to go now."

"Four weeks until my impending nuptials," Mark grinned, but it disappeared when Meredith shot him a playfully annoyed look. "Oh, come on. It'll be fun."

"Oh, yeah," she agreed, her tone sarcastic but playful. "Make sure there's a mop handy in case my water breaks on the dance floor."

"That would be so awesome," Cristina piped up, popping a chip into her mouth.

"No. That would not be awesome," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "I agree with my wife. Not awesome."

"Look on the bright side... this'll be your last big 'hoorah' until Lilly is born," Mark pointed out. "I say make the most of it."

"I go on maternity leave next week. I'll be climbing the walls in boredom. Believe me, I'm excited," Meredith told him. "Even with swollen feet and needing to pee every ten minutes. Speaking of which..." she used Derek's shoulder for leverage as she got out of her chair. "I need to pee."

"She's starting to waddle a little," Cristina murmured under her breath so Meredith wouldn't be able to hear as she headed for the bathroom.

But Meredith whipped around, a hand on her hip. "Okay, seriously? I heard that..."

...

Derek lazily threaded his fingers through her hair, trailing his hand down her back where it came to rest at the base of her spine. "Hmm, I love you," he said, his lips pressed to hers.

Meredith smiled. "I love you, too," she said, resting her forehead against his as they lay in their bed together. In a few weeks from now, the house would go from peaceful to noisy literally overnight, so they decided to take every available moment to savor the quiet with just the two of them.

"You're so beautiful," he told her before kissing her again.

"What did you say that for?" she giggled.

Derek shrugged. "Because it's true."

"Will it still be true when my boobs are leaking and Lilly's crying and we're both covered in baby poop?" she asked playfully, her fingers toying with the curls on the back of his neck.

"Yes," he chuckled. "Even then."

She felt her abdominal muscles tightening again, another Braxton Hicks contraction coming on, and she rubbed her hand over her belly. When Derek noticed, Meredith saw the fear in his eyes and she smiled at him. "Derek, I'm fine. I promise."

"Okay," he replied, swallowing thickly, pursing his lips together in worry.

Meredith put her palm on his cheek. "You're gonna be a nervous wreck in the delivery room, aren't you?" she giggled.

"Sorry," Derek said, managing a small smile. "I just worry about you and Lilly."

"I know. But I promise you, everything's fine. They don't hurt. And it's already gone. See?" she comforted him, placing his hand over her bump and kissing him. "I have an idea. Why don't you two talk? Just pretend I'm not here," Meredith said, turning on her back and folding her hands under her head.

Derek propped himself up on his elbow and lifted up her shirt, kissing around her belly. He was silent for a few seconds as he contemplated what to say, then he smiled. "Hi, Lilly. It's Daddy," he said softly. "I can't wait to meet you - you know, but not until your due date. Stay inside Mommy a little longer and grow big and strong." He laughed quietly. "For future reference, usually I'm calm and Mommy is the one that worries. This is a little out of character."

"I heard that," Meredith yawned, her eyes closed as she gave them their privacy.

"We love you so much," Derek said. "I still can't believe Mommy and I made you. You know, Mommy is kind of amazing, Lilly. She's smart and she's funny and she's beautiful. And she really loves us. I already know that on the day you're born, she's gonna do such an awesome job. She might yell at me a little and say some not so nice words, but that's okay," he chuckled. "Because the second we see you for the first time, it'll all be worth it. I love you, Lilly."

Derek pressed one more kiss on Meredith's belly, then readjusted her shirt. He could see her belly button popping out underneath and he smiled. As much as he couldn't wait to meet Lilly, Derek knew that he'd miss Meredith being pregnant. Everything about her body fascinated him, from the swell of her breasts to her glowy skin to her cravings, and even the popped belly button that she was slightly freaked out by. He loved all of her, most especially his tiny daughter growing inside, all safe and warm and protected by his wife.

He rested his head next to Meredith's on the pillow and heard the soft hum of her breathing in his ear as she slept. After settling the blanket over both of them, Derek draped his arm over her belly. "Goodnight, Mer," Derek whispered, kissing her cheek. He felt Lilly's foot gently nudge his arm and he smiled. "You too, Lilly."


	94. Last Day of Work

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Good news! This semester from hell is finally over, which means more writing time. Hopefully I'll be able to post more often now, at least for the next few weeks anyway. Enjoy this chapter! Oh, and for those that read my one shot fics, I'm going to try to write at least one over the holidays, so be on the lookout! :)  
**

Meredith walked down the hall toward the resident lounge, trying to savor every moment of her last day before maternity leave. As annoyed as she was that the hospital was basically making her stop working at thirty-six weeks, she knew her body needed the rest. Her feet were swollen, her belly bumped everything in sight, and she visited the bathroom at least once an hour to pee. The prospect of getting to sleep in and lounge around at home doing nothing was actually starting to sound appealing, not that she'd ever admit it to anyone.

She opened the lounge door and smiled when she saw the _'Happy Last Day, Meredith!' _banner taped above her cubby, undoubtedly Izzie's doing. "Thanks, you guys," she said to her friends as she dropped her bag down onto the bench.

"So... are you excited?" Izzie asked.

Meredith shrugged. "Yes and no. I'm excited to get to sleep in every day, and walk around in socks all day long..." she said, pulling off her shoes so she could change into her scrub pants. "My feet are so freaking swollen already."

"Well, you're eight months pregnant. Taking time off will be good for you," Lexie said supportively, smiling at her sister.

"I know," Meredith agreed. "But I know that in forty-eight hours, I'll be bored out of my mind. My body doesn't know how to shut off the Resident Mode."

"Is Shepherd taking time off, too?" Alex asked, biting into one of the muffins Izzie had baked for Meredith's last day.

"Not until after she's born. Babies are expensive," Meredith giggled as she pulled her scrub shirt over her head and smoothed it out over her belly. "One of us needs to bring in money."

"You still get paid, right?" George said, clipping his ID badge to his pocket.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. But Derek brings in the fancy neurosurgeon money. Can I have one of those?" she asked, pointing to the large container of muffins on the table.

"Of course. I made them for you. Alex is just a mooch," Izzie said as she rolled her eyes at him. "Take as many as you want."

"I shouldn't even eat one, but they smell so good," Meredith yawned as she walked over to the table. "I'm so freaking bloated."

"Wow," Alex laughed. "Never thought I'd see this side of you, Grey..."

Meredith dropped down into a chair and sighed, peeling back the paper on the bottom of the muffin and biting into it. "Sorry. Along with not being able to see my feet, I also lost my ability to censor what comes out of my mouth," she giggled.

"I find it charming," Alex said, chugging down his coffee. "So, uh, if you poop during delivery, you won't care about that either?"

Izzie's eyes went wide and she smacked his arm. "Oh my God! Don't scare her with stuff like that!"

"Oh, I already told Derek not to tell me if I do. I'll be mortified enough as it is," Meredith said, tapping her fingers over her belly as the baby kicked. "Lilly's kicking. I think she likes the muffins."

"Speaking of that, I'm making you and Derek a care package. You know, food that you can freeze and reheat for after she's born. You're not going to have the energy to cook anything, so I want to help out. And I'm not taking no for an answer, so don't even try to stop me," Izzie said with a smile.

"Thank you, Iz," Meredith replied. "That's really sweet." She looked around the resident lounge and sighed sadly. "I'm going to miss this."

"It's not like you won't be back," Cristina pointed out. "Hell, you'll be back in four weeks to push a human being out of your body."

Meredith smirked. "Very comforting."

Derek appeared in the doorway and pointed his thumb toward the hall. "Bailey's coming," he warned them.

The five of them hopped out of their chairs, leaving Meredith there like a sitting duck. "Hello? Help please?" she laughed, holding her hand out.

George spun around and took her hand, helping to hoist her up out of the chair. "Thank you, George," she said.

George smiled. "No problem."

The two met up with Derek and the others in the hall, just as Bailey was approaching. "Any cases today?" Meredith asked her husband, who had a cup of decaf tea in his hand for her.

"Mrs. Donahue just rescheduled," Derek said.

Meredith frowned before taking a sip of tea. "What? Why?"

"Her grandson was just born and she wants to get back home. It was a non-emergent procedure. She'll be back next week," he explained. "So unless something comes up, no fancy brain surgeries today."

"Okay, Karev, you're with Robbins on the kid who needs the transplant. Izzie, they need someone up in neonatal. Yang, you're with Torres. O'Malley, go prep Mr. Breslin for the thoracotomy. And Grey, in honor of your last day, I thought I'd go easy on you. You're in the clinic," Bailey said.

Meredith blinked. "What?"

"Take your husband with you," Bailey offered. "He's not scrubbed in anywhere."

"This is no fair," Meredith argued, crossing her arms on top of her belly.

Derek laughed. "Hey, last I checked, you enjoyed my company."

"I remember how exhausted I was on my last day here when I was pregnant. Believe me, you'll thank me later," Bailey said wisely, turning around and heading toward the nurses' station.

Meredith took another bite of her muffin. "This sucks."

"We'll make the most of it," Derek said in an effort to make the day ahead sound more appealing. "If there's nothing going on, we can sneak away for sex."

"I am kind of horny," Meredith admitted. "But I have no energy to be on top."

"That spooning thing is kind of fun," Derek grinned, hitting the button for the elevator.

Meredith smiled, her mood improving at the prospect of sneaky, dirty hospital sex, the last time she'd have sex at work for the next few months. "Yes it was..."

...

Three hours passed in the clinic. Three hours spent giving tetanus shots and suturing and writing prescriptions for various creams. The definition for dull if there ever was one. Meredith sat back in her swivel chair at the nurses' station and kicked off her shoes. "Bailey's plan is working," she said.

Derek flipped a chart shut and deposited it back in the bin. "What do you mean?"

"I'll thank her later when my clinic sentence is over," Meredith giggled. "Do you have fifty cents?"

"Yeah. For what?" he asked, reaching for his wallet.

Meredith pointed to the vending machine. "Can you get me a granola bar or something? Lilly starts kicking me if I don't eat something every two hours."

"Sure." Derek kissed the top of her head, then walked over toward the waiting area.

Olivia entered the clinic and made a beeline for the nurses' station where Meredith was seated. "Hey. There's a trauma coming into the ER. Do you think you could help out? We could use a few extra hands," she asked.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, wedging her feet back into her shoes. "I'll bring Derek with me."

"Thank you," Olivia called out, already running back toward the trauma bay.

Meredith stood up and waved Derek back over, smiling when he handed her the chocolate chip granola bar. "The ER has a trauma coming in. We need to go help with the overflow," she told him, quickly unwrapping her snack and biting off a piece of it.

"Okay," Derek replied.

They crossed the ambulance bay and entered the ER doors to put on trauma gowns and gloves, moving quickly to meet the ambulances outside in time. "Any idea what happened?" Derek asked a nearby nurse.

"The play place at Happy Land collapsed. Big group of kids coming in from a birthday party," she briefed them.

"Happy Land? That sounds like a sex shop," Meredith said, tying the back of Derek's yellow gown.

"It's like Chuck E. Cheese," Derek informed her, laughing. "You wanted excitement, right? A bunch of little kids should help with that."

"Better than being stuck in the clinic," Meredith shrugged. She finished off the last of her granola bar then slipped on her gloves. "You still owe me spoony sex when we get home," she said, smiling at him.

"It's a date."

"A sex date?" Meredith giggled.

"Yes," Derek grinned. "A porny, fun, sex date."

The wailing of the ambulance sirens alerted them to the incoming trauma, and they ran outside to meet them, anxiously anticipating what was to come. Working in the pit could be fun at times, but when little kids were involved, the task became much more daunting. The first ambulance pulled into the bay and two paramedics swung open the back doors. "Lindsay Dreyer, age seven. She was in the play place when it collapsed on top of the ball pit. Initial exam showed nothing more than a few bump and bruises, but we brought her here just to be safe," the paramedic told them.

"Lindsay, my name is Meredith. I'm going to check you out, okay," Meredith said comfortingly.

Derek signed his name on the paramedic's chart, admitting her into his care. "She looks okay. Any serious injuries coming in?"

"Thankfully, no. Not from what we could see. Mostly superficial wounds," she said. "There's a few more kids rolling in now."

"Okay," Derek nodded. He turned his attention to Lindsay, smiling when he saw her pink sash and tiara. "Hey, Lindsay. Are you the birthday girl?"

"Uh huh," Lindsay replied. "I'm seven."

"Well, happy birthday," Derek said enthusiastically, examining her pupils. "So what happened?"

"Me and Brittany and Josh were in the play place thingy and it fell into the ball pit underneath us. Chloe, Savannah, and Max were in there. Mommy was screaming and saying lots of bad words to the people at Happy Land," the girl laughed. "Can I still have my birthday cake? I told Mommy to bring it."

Meredith smiled. "Yeah, you can still have your cake. Let's just get you and your friends checked out first, okay?" she said.

Another gurney was wheeled in next to Lindsay's, escorted by Hunt. "Brittany, this is Meredith and Derek. They're gonna take care of you, okay?" Owen said, patting the girl's shoulder. He turned to the two of them and pointed to the ER doors. "Another kid is coming in. Would you mind looking after her?"

"Not at all. It's a birthday party, right?" Derek managed to laugh. "Hi, Brittany. I'm Derek. Do you hurt anywhere?"

Before the girl could answer, she vomited all over the bed, sending Meredith's gag reflex into overdrive. "Oh crap," she said, turning her head and placing her hand over her mouth.

"Deep breaths, Mer," Derek said, lifting Brittany off the bed and placing her onto another. "I need a nurse over here, please!"

A little boy was brought in while Meredith was regaining composure, not looking at the vomit, and she walked over to him. "Are you Josh?"

"Max," the little boy said. He saw the nurse carry away the vomit covered sheets and he shrieked. "Ew, who threw up?"

"I, uh..." Meredith swallowed thickly. "Are you hurt?"

"Hi, Max!" Lindsay waved excitedly.

"Did your mom bring the cake?" Max asked her while Meredith checked his pupils.

"I dunno," Lindsay shrugged. "Meredith, are you having a baby?"

Meredith patted Lindsay's gurney and looked to Max. "Hop up here, okay?"

Max did as he was told then pointed to Meredith's belly. "So are you having a baby?"

Derek sent Brittany off with one of the ER interns to get changed, then walked around the bed to help Meredith. "Yes, she is having a baby," he answered. "A little girl."

"What's her name gonna be?" Lindsay asked as Derek palpated her skull to make sure there were no fractured areas.

"Lilly," Derek replied.

"How do you know?" Max asked.

Meredith smiled as she palpated Max's skull. "Because he's the daddy," she informed them. Perhaps TMI, but she didn't particularly care.

"You are?" Lindsay gasped.

"Yep," Derek grinned, scribbling down some notes in the girl's chart. "Pretty cool, huh?"

Brittany returned, wearing some largely oversized scrubs, and Derek hoisted her up onto the gurney with her two friends. "They're having a baby," Max informed her.

"Really? When?" Brittany asked.

"In a few weeks," Meredith said. "Actually, this is my last day at work until after the baby is born."

"We were going to celebrate today," Derek said, flashing her a grin.

Meredith nudged his shoulder with hers and rolled her eyes. "Mmhmm..."

"Like a party?" Lindsay asked. "We could sing to you, too!"

"No, no. That's okay, sweetie. It's your birthday," Meredith said, hoping Derek kept his mouth shut. She knew how amusing he would find it if a group of kids sang to her, especially in the middle of the ER.

"When my cousin was born, there was a big party for my aunt. Did you have one of those?" Brittany asked.

Meredith sighed amusedly. "No, I haven't had a baby shower yet. But it's coming though..."

"Is it?" Derek smirked, checking Brittany's pupils.

"Just a hunch," Meredith shrugged. "Okay, Max, it looks like you have some bruising on your arm. And Lindsay, you have a few scratches on your chin."

"What about me?" Brittany asked.

Derek smiled. "Looks to me like you just had too much pizza, that's all."

"Aww, I won't get to wear a cast?" Max asked, disappointed by his minor injuries.

"I don't think so, buddy," Derek sighed.

Another round of kids entered the ER, accompanied by two adults, the chaos escalating by the second. "Do you know those grown-ups?" Meredith asked them.

"Uh huh. That's my mom and dad," Lindsay said. "Mommy! Daddy!"

The girl's parents rushed over to her side, making sure she was okay. "How is she?" Lindsay's mother asked worriedly.

"She's fine; they're all just fine," Derek assured them both. "Excuse us a second. We need to check on the others."

"Chloe, Savannah, and Josh," the paramedic said, pointing to each of them. "The girls look good, but Josh is complaining of some pain in his foot. It might be fractured."

"Okay," Meredith nodded. She smiled at the kids. "Derek and I are going to check you out, okay?"

"My foot hurts," Josh whined.

"I know. We're going to take care of it, okay?" Meredith said comfortingly. "Can you page Torres please?" she asked a nurse. Meredith gently removed the boy's shoe, careful not to jostle his foot. "Does anything else hurt?"

Josh shook his head. "No."

"How about you girls?" Derek addressed Chloe and Savannah. "Does anything hurt?"

"Nope," Chloe answered. "Is Lindsay here?"

"She's over there," Derek said, pulling out his penlight and checking her pupils. "You can go see them once we're done, okay?" He switched to Savannah's eyes and examined them. "No dizziness or headaches?"

Savannah shook her head. "No. Did Lindsay's mom bring the cake?"

"This must be one heck of a cake," Derek chuckled.

"She didn't even get to open her presents yet," Josh said dramatically. "We didn't get to smash the piñata either."

"A piñata, huh? That's my kind of party," Derek agreed.

"And she had ice cream cake!" Savannah added.

"Wow. Ice cream cake, too," Meredith said, sounding impressed.

Bailey entered the ER, quickly securing her gown so she could help manage the chaos. She spotted Meredith and Derek in a sea of little kids and smiled. "Wishing you were over in the clinic right now, don't you?"

Meredith smiled. "A little, yeah."

...

She barely had enough energy to change back into her clothes at the end of her shift, and her feet were practically screaming at her. The day had been long and tiring, and she didn't even get to see the inside of an OR. And now, it was over. Mostly, that fact sucked. But a part of her was relieved that she got to go home and do nothing more than curl up in bed with Derek. "No more scrubs for a while, Lilly..." she sighed, tossing them into the bin.

"Hey," Derek said as he entered the lounge, setting his briefcase on the table.

Meredith shimmied back into her pants and smiled at him. "Hey."

"Are you sad?" he asked.

"Twelve hours ago, I thought you would've had to drag me out of here. But now, I'm exhausted," she giggled. "My body wants me to stop, even if my brain says work until I'm in labor."

"I agree with your body on that one," Derek chuckled. "Sorry there were no surgeries."

"That's okay. I had fun," Meredith said, shoving her books into her tote bag, along with other odds and ends she wanted to take with her while she was on leave.

Derek eyed her curiously. "You did?"

"Yeah. I mean, little kids are exhausting. But still, it was nice to spend the day with you," Meredith said.

"It was fun spending the day with you, too," Derek said. He walked over to her and sat down on the bench next to her. "I thought we could stop for takeout on the way home. Then have that spoony sex."

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. "I'd like that," she said, tossing out some old food from her cubby into the trash can.

"How long has that been in there?"

"How long have I had this cubby?" she asked.

Derek laughed. "That's gross, Mer."

"I never have time to clean this thing out," Meredith said, finding a stack of tampons in her pile of stuff and splitting them evenly between Izzie's and Cristina's cubbies. "They're always asking me for tampons. And since I'm knocked up and don't need them, these can be my parting gift."

"Very kind of you," Derek teased. He saw a picture of the two of them from a long time ago, before Addison even showed up, taped on the side of her cubby and he smiled. "I never knew you kept that there."

"Oh. Yeah. I've had that picture with me since I got it developed all those years ago. At first, I had it tucked into the back of my intern locker. When I was having a bad day, it always made me happy. Then once we got together-together, I taped it up. And here's one of Lilly," Meredith said, pointing to one of their daughter's ultrasound photos.

"Pretty soon, you'll be able to hang up her newborn pictures," Derek grinned proudly.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. "And you'll need a bigger desk for all the pictures of her."

"Oh, I plan on having pictures of Lilly plastered all over the walls of my office," Derek said. "And, you know, any additional offspring, of course."

"Uh huh," Meredith giggled. "As long as you don't hang up any pictures of me on the wall, that's all."

"I only have the two pictures of us on my desk... one of us at our wedding, and one of us at Izzie and Alex's," Derek said.

"Hmm, the day we found out I was pregnant with her," she said, smoothing her shirt over her belly.

"That's what that picture reminds me of." Derek kissed the top of her head and she leaned into him. "All set?"

Meredith nodded. "Yep, let's go."

...

"So I was thinking, this weekend we could put the nursery together," Meredith said as she twirled some pasta on her fork. "All of her clothes and bedding are washed, so all we need to do is move everything in."

"Sure, sounds good," Derek agreed, taking another bite of salad. "Mark and I already assembled the furniture, so the hard part is done. It's just figuring out where to put everything. She has a lot of stuff."

"And she's only going to get more after the baby shower. I already told everyone not to go overboard, but they never listen," she said.

"Well, they know we bought all the big things, right?" Derek pointed out. "And we only registered for items on the registry Izzie made us do. Clothes and toys and stuff."

"Exactly. Lilly's wardrobe is already bigger than both of ours combined," Meredith laughed. "She has two sock drawers, Derek."

"_You_ wanted to buy all those socks," Derek reminded her, making sure she caught the smirk on his face.

Meredith bit her lip, trying to come up with a defense, but couldn't. "Shut up."

"She has a big closet. There'll be plenty of room for her dresses and shoes and headbands," Derek chuckled.

"I can't wait to put those headbands on her. Think of how cute she'll look, especially if she has hair like yours," Meredith said with a smile as she sprinkled more parmesan cheese onto her chicken.

Derek shook his head in incredulity. "Where is the tequila-loving girl I met in the bar that night?"

"I blame you," Meredith retorted. "You turned me into a cheerful person."

"You've always been cheerful. It's just been hidden under that cloak of darkness," Derek teased her.

Meredith tossed a crouton at him and narrowed her eyes. "I'm carrying your child. Can you not make fun of me?" she requested playfully.

"Sorry." He kissed her cheek then hopped up off the stool, heading for the fridge. "I know a way I can make it up to you."

"How?"

Derek pulled two slices of ice cream cake out of the fridge and placed them on the counter in front of her. "Birthday cake."

"Where did you get cake from? And how did you sneak it in here?" she asked, waiting for an explanation.

"You were with Callie putting the cast on Josh's foot, and Lindsay told me to take some cake so you and I could celebrate," he grinned, grabbing two clean forks from the drawer. "Her mom cut me two slices, and I ran it upstairs to the freezer in the attending lounge. And then before I came to see you after your shift, I snuck the plate out to the car. And while you were getting changed, I snuck the plate into the house."

Meredith smiled at him as she accepted the fork he handed her. "You did all of that for me?"

"Well technically, Lindsay supplied the cake. I just delivered it to you."

"Sneaky, clever man..." She sliced off a small sliver of the chocolate ice cream cake with her fork and brought it to her mouth. "Mmm, wow. Happy birthday, Lindsay."

"Good?"

"I want this for my birthday. Seriously, take a bite," Meredith said, tapping her fork on his plate.

"That is good," Derek agreed, his mouth full of the ice cream cake. "I'll make sure there's one here on your birthday," he promised her.

"If you could call Izzie and tell her I want ice cream cake for this mysterious baby shower, I'll give you lots of spoony sex tonight," she bribed, not that she really needed to. Derek would ask Izzie regardless, just as Meredith would give him sex. Win-win scenario for both of them.

Derek pulled his cell phone from his pocket, amused. "Chocolate, right?"

"Yes, with the Oreo crumbs," Meredith added. "Oh, and frosting flowers." She licked some ice cream from her fingers and smiled. Maybe maternity leave wouldn't be so bad.


	95. Maternity Leave

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. I just wish I did.**

**Only a week between updates! Winter break is awesome. ;) Because next weekend is Christmas, there probably won't be an update. I have a one shot started, and I'm hoping to have that posted within the next few days. Enjoy this chapter!  
**

Meredith sighed up at the ceiling. Maternity leave sucked. Because it was six in the morning, and thanks to the nap she'd taken out of boredom the night before, she was wide awake before sunrise. And on top of that, she had a craving for brownies that wouldn't go away, no matter how much she tried to distract herself.

She kicked the covers off, and rolled over as best she could, her pregnant belly getting more difficult to move from side to side as it grew. "Ugh," Meredith huffed.

The time staring back at her from the clock on her nightstand read 6:03. Normally, now is when she'd be getting up for work. But again, because of the maternity leave that was forced upon her thanks to stupid hospital policy, there were no alarm clocks. No surgeries. No scrubs. And while she appreciated the chance to get the rest her body needed, no one told her how freaking bored she'd be.

"Derek," Meredith whispered after she rolled her body to the other side, careful not to whomp him with her belly in the process.

He was sound asleep next to her, his face buried in the pillow, snug under the covers. He looked so peaceful and cozy… and it was pissing her off. Irrational, yes. But a small part of her was slightly annoyed that her husband could sleep on his stomach. His flat, non-baby-inhabited stomach.

"Derek," she said again, nudging his shoulder. He let out a quiet snore at her jostling, but didn't move. "Der."

He squinted his eyelids shut tightly then blinked them open. "Hmm, what?"

"Hey," she said.

"Hey." His eyes flickered shut as he was pulled back to sleep until Meredith nudged him again. "'S wrong?"

"I can't sleep."

Derek sighed tiredly. After finishing a forty-eight hour shift the night before, his brain could barely process what she was telling him, but he didn't want to get on her bad side either, especially at six in the morning. "That tea…"

Meredith looked over at him. "What?"

"Chamomile tea in the cabinet," he trailed off as he sunk back into sleep.

"That's it? Tea?" Meredith used his shoulder for leverage to pull herself into a sitting position and swung her legs over the side of the bed. "Really helpful. Thanks," she muttered.

Derek flipped onto his back, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his wrists. "Sorry, I'm tired. What do you want me to do?"

"Nothing. Go back to sleep," Meredith said, tying her hair back into a ponytail. "Wouldn't want to disturb you…"

"Mer, I worked for two days straight. I'm exhausted," Derek said into his pillow. "I know you're uncomfortable. Just tell me what you'd like me to do, and I'll do it."

"I'd like you to give a crap!" Meredith said angrily. "I'm carrying your baby, I'm retaining water like a freaking cactus, I have porn star boobs that are spilling out of my bra, and Lilly's head-butting me in the cervix, which isn't such a pleasant feeling. And all you can say is 'go drink tea.'"

"Meredith, I don't want to fight. I know you're not feeling great these days. I know you're bored sitting around the house all day, and I'm sorry. But please don't say I don't give a crap. I haven't been working my ass off lately for kicks. I'm doing it for our family. So if there's something you want me to do to help you… cook you something or rub your feet or go to the store to get something that'll make you more comfortable, please let me know. Otherwise, I don't know what to do," Derek said.

"I don't know. But tea isn't going to do a damn thing," she pointed out. She heaved a heavy sigh and shook her head. "I'm going out. I'll be back later."

"It's six in the morning…"

"And?"

Derek stared at her blankly, trying to keep his cool. "Okay, well, where are you going?"

She pulled on a pair of shorts, then reached for her bra. "The grocery store is having a sale on newborn diapers. And we both need shampoo."

"I can go out and get that stuff later," Derek offered.

"I need to get out of the house," she said, tossing her camisole into the hamper and securing her bra in place. She grabbed a shirt from her drawer and put it on, then slipped her feet into her flip-flops. "I have my phone. Just… sleep or whatever."

"Mer."

Before he could say anything else, she closed the bedroom door behind herself, and he heard her footsteps in the hall, eventually becoming distant and disappearing after she descended the stairs. Derek knew from experience that chasing after her wouldn't do any good, so he didn't. Instead, he gave her time to chill, get out of the house, and have some retail therapy, even if it was just a trip to the grocery store for diapers and shampoo.

…

Meredith's was standing in the checkout line, reaching for her wallet in her purse when her cell phone rang. She pulled it from her pocket, expecting the call to be from Derek, but the name flashing over the screen told her it was Cristina.

"Hello?" she said as she handed the cashier the money.

"Hey," Cristina responded. She heard the beeping and bustling in the background, and glanced at her watch. "Where are you?"

Meredith smiled politely at the cashier as he handed her the receipt and her change, then pushed her cart full of diapers and two bottles of shampoo toward the exit. "The grocery store," she answered.

"It's 7:00 in the morning."

"Couldn't sleep," Meredith shrugged. "And rather than bitch at Derek, I figured shopping would be more productive."

"Yeah? How'd that go?"

Meredith smiled. "I just spent fifty-nine dollars on two bottles of shampoo and four boxes of diapers."

"Damn. How many diapers is that?"Cristina asked.

"Over three hundred Huggies to cover her little baby hiney," Meredith said, opening the trunk of her car and stacking the diaper boxes inside. "That should be enough to last us a while. Hey, why exactly are you calling me so early?" she laughed.

"I forgot you weren't working," Cristina shrugged. "At least you weren't asleep."

Meredith slammed the trunk shut and wheeled her cart into the nearby drop-off spot. "I wish," she said. "Derek is all comfy-cozy, and I'm the insane one buying diapers at dawn."

"His surgery lasted ten hours yesterday. I'm surprised he even drove home. McDreamy looked exhausted last night when he left," Cristina said, taking a sip of her coffee. "I told him he should just stay, but of course, he didn't listen to the voice of reason."

"I hadn't seen him for almost two days. He wanted to come home," Meredith said. She unlocked the driver's side door and slid inside, wedging her pregnant belly behind the wheel. "It's probably good that he's sleeping."

"Crap, I'm late for surgery. Big, bloody trauma case came in earlier this morning," Cristina said, unable to tame her excitement.

Meredith fastened her seatbelt and smiled. "Maybe I'll go watch. I miss it there."

"Come. Live vicariously through me and my bloody surgery," Cristina coaxed.

"Alright. I'll… wave from the gallery," Meredith sighed. "Maternity leave sucks."

"Sounds like it," Cristina agreed, not even attempting to claim otherwise. "See you when you get here."

"Okay. Bye." Meredith ended the call and tossed her phone onto the passenger seat. "I know I should call and apologize to Daddy, Lilly," she told her belly as she reversed out of her parking space. "But I'm not that big of a person right now…"

…

Meredith knew that sitting in the OR gallery dressed in a tee shirt, shorts, and flip-flops was hardly professional looking, but after working at the hospital for almost five years, everyone knew her, so she wasn't all that concerned.

She peeled open the wrapper to the granola bar from her purse and propped her feet up on the glass in front of her. If she wasn't able to do the surgery, she was at least going to make herself comfortable. She texted Derek with her whereabouts so he wouldn't worry, then got lost in her surgical happy place. It wasn't until she heard Bailey's voice that she was pulled back to reality.

"What're you doing here?" Bailey asked, dropping down into the chair next to hers.

Meredith glanced over at her and sighed. "Maternity leave sucks."

Bailey laughed. "That's what I thought. But believe me, enjoy it while you can. Once the baby comes, you'll be wishing all you had to do was sit around and watch TV in bed," she said wisely.

"I know. I think I'm just restless. This morning, I started fighting with Derek because I couldn't sleep, and there he was, dreaming away."

"I've been there, too," Bailey nodded.

"Any advice for the water retention and throbbing in my crotch?" Meredith laughed, taking a swig from her water bottle.

"Giving birth," Bailey joked. "Wish I had more sage advice, but that's the only answer I've got."

"Hmm, I was afraid of that," Meredith smirked.

Bailey smiled at her. "The last few weeks are tough. You can't see your own feet. You're tired all the time. And you know that pushing a baby out of your vajayjay is in your immediate future," she chuckled.

Meredith tucked her hair behind her ear and giggled. "Yeah, that sounds about right."

"It's worth it though. The first time you see her? It'll be the most profound moment of your entire life," Bailey said, patting the top of Meredith's hand.

Meredith felt Lilly kick her, just barely, and she smiled down at her bump under her shirt. "I know it will," she said softly. "I'm actually going to miss being pregnant. I love feeling her move and kick, even if it makes me have to pee every ten minutes." She laughed. "I actually blamed having to pee all the time on Derek this morning."

"Well, you're doing all the work. It's only fair if you blame him for things once in a while," Bailey pointed out.

"I don't mean to snap at him. But he's right there, and he lets me, so I do it," she managed to joke as she munched on her granola bar.

"Of course he lets you. That man loves you, Grey," Bailey said.

Meredith smiled. "I know he does."

Bailey's pager rang out in the gallery, and she pulled it from her pocket. "I have to get to surgery," she said. She squeezed Meredith's shoulder lightly after she stood up. "You'll be back here soon, so enjoy your time off. It's a gift… one that comes with a paid leave. Gifts like that don't come around very often."

"I know," Meredith laughed. She glanced down to the OR, and though part of her missed it, she had to admit, taking a break from the hustle and bustle of the hospital might do her some good. She gathered her things and got out of her chair. "I'm going."

"Not gonna stick around until it's over?" Bailey asked as they exited the gallery and walked toward the stairs.

Meredith shook her head. "No. Derek's off today and I want to get home." She sighed at herself, amused. "I feel bad for yelling at him. I never used to feel bad for yelling at him."

"That's because he probably deserved it," Bailey joked.

"Well, that's true."

…

Derek flipped on the coffee pot, then set about the business of his usual day off. It was rare that he got a Friday off, but thanks to some surgery shuffling, he had the next three days to relax. Only with Meredith still being gone after yelling at him this morning, relaxing wasn't so easy. He'd gotten her text, saying she was at the hospital, so he hoped that when she came home, she was in a better mood. The hospital always made her feel better.

After he put a load of dirty clothes into the washer, he heard his cell phone ringing in his pocket, and he quickly grabbed it, thinking it was Meredith. But when he saw Izzie's name pop up on the screen, he already knew what the call was about, and he was slightly relieved that Meredith wasn't in the house.

"Hello?" he answered, tucking the phone between his chin and his shoulder as he opened the back door to let Charlie run around outside in the yard.

"Hey," Izzie said. "Is Mer around? I wanted to talk to you about tomorrow."

"No, she's at the hospital," Derek replied. "Wait, aren't you there?"

"I'm in the clinic, so I had some free time. Why is she at the hospital?" Izzie asked, as she chewed on something.

Derek sighed. "Long story. So, what's up?" he asked, taking the box of Muesli from the cabinet.

"Oh, right. I ordered her ice cream cake with strawberry frosting and those sugar flower things. At first, I thought vanilla frosting, but the strawberry is pink, and because you're having a girl, I thought it would be cuter. She likes strawberry frosting, right?"

"Mer likes anything with strawberries," Derek chuckled as he took the milk out of the fridge.

"Okay, good," Izzie said. "So I told everyone to be there by one, but I want to give them some time, because a few people are coming from work. Could you be at the house by two?"

"Yeah, that's good. I guess I'll just ask her if she wants to go out to lunch or something," Derek said, grabbing a spoon then sitting down at the counter.

"Good. And I'll call you around one thirty with some fake emergency," Izzie decided.

Derek narrowed his eyes. "Like what?"

"Like… I can't get the garage door open, and Alex is at work, so you have to come fix it," she suggested. "So tell Mer that you have to make a quick stop over here before lunch."

"Alright," Derek played along. "I can do that." He paused. "Am I going to be the only man at this thing?"

"A few of the guys had to work to make up for all the women being over here, but I think Sloan is coming, and maybe Alex if he doesn't get paged in," Izzie told him. "And don't worry, I told everyone to park a block over, so Mer won't see the cars."

"Okay," Derek nodded as he shoveled a spoonful of cereal into his mouth. "I'm just glad this wasn't planned for today. She's pissed because she couldn't sleep and I was."

"She has to be in a good mood tomorrow; otherwise, this baby shower will be DOA," Izzie said.

"Don't worry. I'll make sure she's happy."

"Thank you," Izzie sighed in relief. "Okay, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow. If there's anything else I need, I'll text you so Mer won't hear your phone ringing, so keep it nearby."

"Okay. I will," Derek promised. "And thanks, Iz. I know this is a lot of work, and I appreciate it."

"It's no problem. I'm happy to do it. Meredith deserves a nice baby shower, even if she wants to kill us all for giving her one," Izzie said.

Derek laughed. "Let's hope not."

…

"Hey," Meredith said as she walked through the front door, tossing her flip-flops onto the steps and walking into the living room, holding a plastic bag of takeout food. "What're you doing?"

Derek glanced up at her and smiled. "Assembling the baby swing."

She dropped the food onto the coffee table, then sat down next to him on the floor. "So, look… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you, or said you don't give a crap. You were tired and—"

"Don't," he said, wrapping his arms around her. "I get it. And I'm sorry, too."

"You worked forty-eight hours without sleeping. You needed rest," Meredith said, arching toward him when he slipped his hands under the back of her shirt and began running his fingers up and down her skin.

"And you're carrying our baby. You need rest, too," he reminded her. "Sorry I wasn't more help."

"Tea? Really?" she giggled.

Derek smirked. "I said I'm sorry."

"I know." Meredith threaded her fingers through his hair and kissed him. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said, his lips pressed to hers.

"I got food," she told him after they pulled back. "Chinese."

"You hate Chinese food."

Meredith smiled. "Non-pregnant me hates Chinese food. But pregnant me has been craving eggrolls all freaking day. And I got wasabi peas, too."

"More?" Derek chuckled.

"I already finished the container we bought the other day. I needed more," Meredith shrugged.

"You're gonna give Lilly heartburn," he teased her.

"Lilly's the reason I'm eating them," Meredith defended. "By the way, there's four boxes of diapers in the trunk."

Derek laughed, helping her up off the floor and taking the bag of food off the table. "Well, that should be enough to last a while."

"How many diapers to babies go through a day?" Meredith asked.

"Probably eight or nine. But you're breastfeeding, so she'll poop more," Derek informed her, untying the bag and removing the Styrofoam containers from inside.

"How do you know that?"

"I read it in _What to Expect_," he said.

"You're very impressive," Meredith said, getting forks from the drawer. "So I guess we'll be going through more diapers."

"Yep. But that's okay. I'd rather have good little pooper," Derek chuckled as they sat down at the kitchen table.

Meredith laughed. "I'm sure that's something she'll want announced when she's sixteen and brings over her boyfriend."

"What? Am I not allowed to be proud of my daughter's digestive tract?" he asked, scooping some noodles onto his plate. "I'm going to be proud of everything she does. From being a good pooper to giving us grandchildren."

"Me too," she agreed as she began chowing down on her eggroll. "Mmm, God, this is so good. How could I ever hate Chinese food?"

"This stuff is so unhealthy," Derek commented while he got drinks for both of them. He laughed. "And it's not even noon yet."

Meredith shrugged. "Lilly likes it, so I don't mind the calories. Plus, I plan on having lots of sex with you later, so... it cancels."

"Lots of sex, huh?"

"Well, we did fight this morning. Kind of," she pointed out as she forked a piece of chicken. "So yes, lots of sex."

"Alright then. Looking forward to it," he grinned. He stole some chicken off her plate, and popped a piece into his mouth. "So how about we go out to lunch tomorrow, then we can start organizing the nursery?"

"We don't go out to lunch," Meredith giggled.

Derek tapped his fingers against his glass as he tried to find a way to convince her. "No, but I have the day off. And I know you're tired of sitting around the house. Come on, it'll be fun."

"Fine," she relented, licking some sauce off her finger. "Where do you want to go?"

"Doesn't matter. You pick," he said, smiling as she practically drowned her eggroll in plum sauce. "Just not Taco Bell, please."

"You suck," she smirked. "Fine, uh... oh, a new seafood place opened up right by the hospital. We could try there if you want."

"Sounds good," Derek nodded, relieved. Step one of the plan was in motion.

...

After his less than helpful suggestion this morning, Derek decided to redeem himself by doing something he knew his wife would appreciate. So while she showered, he took a bottle of lavender lotion from their hall closet.

When she stepped into their bedroom wearing her bath towel, Meredith saw him lying on the bed and she smiled at him. "What're you doing?" she asked suspiciously.

"Helping you relax."

"I am relaxed," Meredith said, running her fingers through her wet hair.

Derek grinned at her. "So you don't want a massage then?"

"Nobody said that," she said playfully. "Are you going to give me a massage, Dr. Shepherd?"

"Hmm, I am. If you'd like one."

Meredith bit her lip and let her bath towel fall to the floor at her feet. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of her body, all rounded and glowy, the way her belly protruded and her breasts swelled. "You're beautiful," Derek said softly as she lay down next to him on their bed.

"Thank you." She leaned in and kissed him, wasting no time in snaking her tongue into his mouth and her hand into his boxers.

Derek gasped for air when he felt her fingers touching his groin. "Not yet," he said. "This is about you."

"Okay," Meredith sighed, removing her hand. "Massage me, then I'll have my way with you." She rested on her side and smiled. "I miss lying on my stomach."

"I know." Derek kissed her shoulder and smelled the vanilla body wash she'd used in the shower. "Soon enough, you'll be able to."

"I know," she whispered, closing her eyes.

Derek rubbed his hands up and down her back, massaging the lotion into her skin. She moaned audibly. "Wow, this is... yeah, you're definitely getting lots of sex for this." Meredith smiled when he massaged between her shoulder blades. "Oh yeah, right there," she said, flexing her back muscles as his fingers dug into the knots.

Derek smirked. "That was dirty."

"Think of it as a pre-game for the sex you're about to have," she said. She rolled onto her back and ran her hands over her breasts. "You can finish later. Right now, I want sex."

He wasted no time in taking off his boxers and tossing them onto the floor next to the bed. "You want to have your way with me?" Derek chuckled, leaning down over her and kissing her.

"Mmhmm," she murmured against his lips. "I want to ride you."

Derek groaned when Meredith's hands stroked him. "Oh God."

She felt the baby move, putting pressure on her bladder, and she smiled up at her husband. "Give me a second. I need to pee."

"Pee fast," he practically pleaded, helping her sit up.

Meredith smirked as she waddled to the bathroom. "Well, that's romantic."


	96. Surprise!

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Happy 2011!  
**

Meredith stood in front of the full length mirror in her bedroom and frowned. Her body had officially been overtaken by her belly, which is why she tried not to look at herself naked that often. But now, while she was trying to find something to wear for her lunch date with Derek, she couldn't help but stare.

"Lilly, how would you feel about being an only child?" she joked. "Because I don't know if my body can handle another spin around the pregnancy wheel."

The bathroom door opened and Derek smiled at her nakedness. "I know you don't think so, but you look gorgeous," he said as he wiped the excess shaving cream off his face with a towel.

"We had sex three times last night. You're not getting lucky right now," Meredith laughed, reaching for her cocoa butter so she could rub some on her skin.

"I didn't say it to get lucky. I said it because it's true," Derek replied. "I'm gonna miss you being pregnant."

Meredith smiled down at her belly. "I know I haven't been pleasant the entire time, but I am too, actually. I like sharing my body with her. Feeling every kick and roll, knowing she's all safe and warm and protected." She shrugged embarrassedly. "I know that's corny, but…"

Derek wrapped his arms around her from behind and rested his chin on her shoulder. "No, it's not. You're just… a mom. You have a bond with her."

"I can't wait to see her for the first time," Meredith said, leaning into him.

"Three more weeks."

"It still feels like we just went to Alex and Izzie's wedding, and you held my dress while I peed," she giggled.

"Twice."

"Twice," she echoed. "And we found out I was pregnant. I didn't think I'd be peeing on a stick that day…"

"Me either," Derek chuckled. "How'd you know?"

"That I was pregnant? I don't know. I just felt… different. Which probably makes no sense, but I did. And it wasn't because of any symptoms or anything. I just had a feeling that we'd finally done it."

"Sometimes, I look at your belly, and I still can't believe it." Derek kissed her shoulder and smiled against her skin. "God, you're beautiful."

Meredith spun around in his arms and narrowed her eyes playfully. "I think someone is trying to get into my big, pregnant pants…"

"You're not wearing pants," he smirked.

"I know. I'm not wearing anything." She pulled back from his embrace and opened her panty drawer, rummaging for a pair. "Tonight," she said, pulling a lacy, white pair up her legs. "Tonight, you can take these off."

Derek's breath nearly caught in his throat at the thought of it, and he had to turn his head away to keep the blood from soaring straight to his groin. Thinking dirty things about his wife right before going to a baby shower probably wasn't a good idea.

"What about this dress?" she asked.

When he turned back around, she was wearing a bra, too, which made it easier to keep his cool. "You'll look beautiful in that."

Meredith held the light blue sundress up to her body and bit her lip as she contemplated. "Okay, I'll wear this," she said.

"I'm gonna go let Charlie out before we leave. Meet you downstairs," he said, kissing her cheek.

She tossed the hanger onto the bed and smiled. "Okay."

Once Derek was safely on the back patio, watching Charlie run around the yard, he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed Izzie's number. "Hey, Iz. It's me," he said as soon as she answered. "We'll be leaving here soon." He checked his watch. "Call my cell in ten minutes or so."

"Okay," Izzie agreed on the other end, dumping a large bag of pretzels into a pink bowl. "She doesn't suspect anything, right?"

"No, I don't think so. If she does, she's hiding it pretty well," he chuckled. He could hear Meredith's flip flops clacking against the tiles on the kitchen floor as she entered. "Okay, I have to go before she sees me on the phone. Ten minutes."

"Ten minutes. Got it."

Derek walked back in the house and grinned at Meredith, taking in her pregnant glowiness. "Wow."

"I know," she sighed, drinking a glass of water. "I look like I stuffed a beach ball under my dress."

"That beach ball is our daughter," he laughed. "And no, it doesn't."

"Thank you," Meredith said, smiling a little at him. She ran her hand over her belly when she heard her stomach growling. "I'm starving."

Charlie ran back into the house and Meredith knelt down to kiss him. "We'll be home later, okay buddy?" She scratched under his chin, then stood upright again with a grunt. "Ugh. Even kneeling for thirty seconds is a workout," she giggled.

"All that sex last night wore you out," Derek chuckled, putting his hand on the small of her back as they walked toward the front door.

"Well, we can't do anything missionary-ish anymore, which means I have to do most of the work on top. I could open jars with my thigh muscles," she said.

Derek smiled. "That makes me proud, Mer."

Ten minutes into the drive, and Izzie's phone call came, right on cue. Derek handed it to Meredith because he was driving, and let Izzie recount her fake emergency to her. After she hung up, Meredith handed him his phone back. "We have to make a quick stop at the old house. Izzie said the dishwasher is making this rumbling sound and Alex is at work, so she asked if you could come by to take a look at it."

"Right now?" Derek asked.

"Something might be leaking. And you know how OCD she is about keeping the kitchen clean. It'll probably only take a few minutes," Meredith said.

"Alright," he agreed, pretending to sound reluctant, but inwardly proud that this was going so smoothly, and that Meredith seemed oblivious to the whole thing.

They pulled up to the old house and into the driveway ten minutes later, Derek holding his breath as he scanned the block for cars that Meredith might recognize. But as promised, none were to be seen, all presumably parked on neighboring streets.

As they got out of the car and walked up to the door, Derek's heart hammered away in his chest nervously. Meredith hated surprises; he knew that. But this was her baby shower, a day she knew was coming down the pike for almost nine months now, so he could only hope she'd find the silver lining in the situation, and not feel bombarded with attention and pink ribbons and people touching her belly.

The foyer and hall leading into the kitchen appeared empty through the glass of the front door, and he swallowed thickly as he held it open for her. Meredith stepped up and over the threshold, and he followed in right behind her, prepared to catch her if she passed out from embarrassment, or felt the need to hit him for duping her.

"Iz?" she called out. She veered left for the living room and stopped in her tracks. "Oh my God…" Meredith murmured, dropping her face into her hands.

"Surprise!" Claps and cheers rang out from the group gathered together in the room, adorned in pinks and yellows with streamers and balloons and decorated with things that said 'It's a Girl!" and piles of presents. Meredith looked around the room, her mouth agape.

Izzie, Cristina, Lexie, Callie, Arizona, Bailey, Bridget, and Mark. A small group, but still, a group of people that had probably known about this for months and hadn't dropped a single hint.

She spun around and glared at her husband. "You knew all along."

"Yeah, I did," he confessed sheepishly.

"We got you so good," Cristina bragged, a beer already in her hand, a necessary commodity for her to survive a baby shower.

Meredith walked into the living room, still dumbfounded by being bombarded. Then it started. The waterworks. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm crying," she sniffled, brushing away the tears that slipped over her eyelids.

"These days, you cry when you see a kitten, Grey," Mark pointed out. "Oh! And that soup commercial... you know, with the brother and sister," he baited her.

"Stop it," Meredith said, her eyes burning even more when she recalled the corny commercial that never ceased to have her sobbing at the end of its thirty second run. "This is just… I don't even know what to say."

"We love you. And Derek. And Lilly. Of course we did this," Izzie said, wrapping her arms around her friend.

"The house is all decorated, and you all gave up your Saturday to be here," Meredith pointed out, smiling graciously at Callie when she handed her a tissue. She noticed one of Lilly's ultrasound pictures blown up to fit in an 8 x 10 frame sitting on the end table, one of Meredith's gifts, and the tears came twice as fast. "And you have one of the sonograms framed…"

"Yeah, that's a little weird," Cristina chimed in.

Meredith ignored the comment, unable to be detracted from her hormonally charged crying fest. "I really freaking hate surprises, but this is… I really appreciate this."

She swiveled around to Derek. "See, I told you we don't do lunch dates. I should've known you had something up your sleeve."

"Admit it, we outsmarted you, Meredith Grey," Izzie said proudly.

"Yes, you did," Meredith giggled. "Thank you."

"Come on, sit," Izzie said, taking her hand and leading her over to the couch.

"Oh God, you're not gonna make me wear a sash or a ribbon hat, are you?" Meredith asked.

"I debated it, but decided on no," Izzie reassured her.

"Where are all the guys?" Derek asked, looking around the room.

"Uh, hello?" Mark piped up. "I'm here."

"Owen and George worked today, so we could all have the day off. And Karev got paged in right before you got here," Callie explained.

Derek laughed. "So it's just me and Mark?"

"Looks like it," Mark nodded. He took a swig from his beer bottle and pointed toward the kitchen. "Come on, let's go grill meat or watch porn or something. I can't sit in Baby-Land all afternoon."

"There's burgers and hot dogs in the fridge," Izzie said. "Make yourselves useful."

Derek leaned down and kissed Meredith, smiling against her lips. "Surprise," he chuckled.

"Hmm, payback's a bitch," she said in a sing-song voice.

"Looking forward to that later."

He and Mark disappeared into the kitchen, and Meredith bit her lip. She felt like a sitting duck without Derek there to save her from potential embarrassment. "So, uh…"

"Okay, what do you want to do first? We have 'Pin the Sperm on the Egg,'" Izzie suggested excitedly.

Lexie nearly choked on the chip she was chewing on. "Are you serious? That exists?"

"I found it at the party store. I had to get it," Izzie said in her own defense. "Or, oh! We can all guess when the baby will be born. We can save the sperm and egg game for later."

"Alright, uh, I say the baby will be born at this baby shower," Cristina began. "Just so she can escape this baby shower."

"Yang," Bailey warned.

Cristina shrugged. "What? She knows I'm kidding."

Meredith reached for a handful of chips. "I don't care what we play. Just don't mind me when I have to take a bathroom break every ten minutes," she giggled.

"Kicking you, huh?" Arizona asked.

"Kicks to the ribs, head-butts to the crotch. She's likes to remind me that she's in there," Meredith joked, munching on a chip.

Callie smiled. "How often do you feel her?"

"Not as much as I did a few weeks ago, because she's running out of room to move," Meredith said. "But a few times a day, depending on her mood. Derek loves it. He was hugging me the other day before he left for work, and she kicked so hard that he could feel it against his stomach. He freaked out, he was so happy."

Cristina snorted, running her piece of bread through the spinach dip on the table. "I bet it's not so cool when she kicks during you-know-what…"

Meredith blushed, and it didn't go unnoticed.

"What? What happened?" Lexie asked.

"Last week," Meredith said, before clamping her mouth shut. "No, I can't. Bailey is here. She doesn't wanna hear this stuff," she laughed.

Bailey smiled. "Actually, I do. That husband of yours is damn near perfect. It's always good to have blackmail to get him to do something for me."

"Bailey has a point," Arizona said.

"Go on," Bridget encouraged.

"You," Meredith pointed at her. "Cannot tell Mark."

"Damn, where is a notepad when you need one?" Cristina said, rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

Meredith glanced into the hall to make sure her husband was out of range in the kitchen before speaking. "I feel bad sharing this," she giggled. "But whatever. I have to push a baby out of my hoohoo with people watching, and he just has to stand there and hold my hand. He owes me."

"What did he do?" Izzie asked.

"He didn't really do anything. It was more on my end. But yeah, he'd be mortified that I'm chatting about our sex life," Meredith said. "Anyway, last week, we were... you know. I was sort of sitting in his lap—that sex position book you got us is freaking amazing, Iz—anyway, we were…" She bit her lip, debating on her word choice.

"Connected?" Cristina offered.

"Oh, God," Meredith winced, along with the rest of the group. "But yes… connected." She shuddered. "And I had to sneeze. We were face to face and I didn't want to sneeze on him, so I was going to…"

"Dismount?"

Meredith smirked at Cristina. "Thank you, Madam Dictionary. Yes, dismount. But before I had the chance to, I sort of just hugged him to me and sneezed over his shoulder. All of the force from sneezing shifted the baby right on top of my bladder, and I peed. On him. During sex," she confessed.

"Oh my God," Callie said, wide eyed. "While he was still, you know?"

"Yeah." Meredith shook her head and sighed. "I didn't even realize it happened until he started freaking out. He thought my water broke, so he—"

"Evacuated?" Cristina said without any hesitation.

Meredith laughed. "Would you shut up? Anyway, he… evacuated. And I was all flustered because I didn't know why he did it. One minute, I'm in the mood, and the next, my husband is looking at me in horror. When I realized what happened, I started laughing, and he wouldn't stop with the freaked out face, which made me laugh harder. When I told him that I peed, I swore he was gonna pass out in relief."

"Oh my God," Izzie said, shaking her head. "The things that happen in your bedroom… the stuff of legends."

"After we changed the sheets, I was still in the mood. He'd denied me an orgasm the first time, and I wasn't going to let it happen again," Meredith said. "But he couldn't, you know…"

Cristina smiled at this. "Rise to the occasion?"

"Oh my God," Meredith said, exasperated, glaring over at her friend. "He was still in shock, thinking that the sex caused my fake water to break."

"He blamed his 'Little Derek?'" Cristina assumed, unable to suppress the peals of laughter that rolled through her. "Oh. Oh, God. That is classic."

Meredith piped up. "Not exactly little. He keeps me very satisfied," she disclosed. TMI, but she wanted to defend her man. "Believe me."

Bailey raised her hand in a halting motion. "Okay, we believe you." She smiled in shock. "Shy, tiny Meredith Grey. I can't believe the story that just came out of your mouth."

"Pregnancy has stripped me of my verbal censors," Meredith admitted, biting into a cookie shaped like a bootie and sprinkled with pink sugar. "And apparently, my modesty."

"Kiss modesty goodbye. Giving birth? No such thing exists," Bailey told her, laughing.

"I'm sure you'll be awesome," Lexie assured her. "Are you nervous?"

"A little. Not excited for the pain, but I can't wait to see her. Honestly, I think Derek will be more nervous than I will," Meredith giggled as she reached for a napkin. "Every time I have a Braxton Hicks contraction, he practically turns white as a ghost."

Derek caught the tail end of Meredith's comment as he walked into the living room holding a beer, and he smirked. "Trash talking me in here?" he asked.

"No," Meredith denied, scooting over on the couch to make room for him. "Before you sit, could you get me some water?"

"Yeah."

"Where's Mark?" Bridget asked.

"He's manning the grill. I told him I'd be back," Derek chuckled, scooping ice into Meredith's pink plastic cup. "So what's going on in here?"

"Nothing. Just talking," Izzie said. "I figured you and Sloan might want to participate in the games, so we're waiting."

Derek sat down on the couch next to Meredith, handing her the cup. "Yeah? What kind of games?"

"'Pin the Sperm on the Egg,' 'Guess What Chocolate Bar is in the Diaper,' and 'Guess the Due Date,'" Izzie replied.

"Eww, that candy bar thing is gross," Cristina said.

"No one said you had to play," Izzie pointed out. "But there's prizes…"

"Wait, sperm and egg?" Derek double checked.

"You and Izzie were the masterminds behind this whole thing. You should've preapproved her itinerary," Meredith reminded him. "Sucks for you."

Cristina laughed. "Sucks for all of us…"

…

A pile of opened gifts were stacked beside Meredith, everything from onesies and bibs to teddy bears and tub toys. All of their friends had gone beyond the call of duty with buying presents, and Meredith was trying her best to hold back her tears. Crying in front of everyone for a second time would be mortifying.

"There's so much stuff here," Meredith said. "Really, this is way too much."

"Shut up and accept your presents," Izzie joked.

"Lilly's gonna be very spoiled. Thank you," Derek said, wrapping his arm around Meredith.

"Crap! I almost forgot…" Izzie hopped up off the couch and headed for the den. "There's more." She walked back in holding three boxes in her arms, setting them down in front of Meredith.

"Who are these from?"

"The two in the shiny pink paper are from your mom, Derek. And the white one with the pink polka dots is from Addison," Izzie said, wedging herself back on the couch between Lexie and Cristina.

Meredith smiled. "Addison sent something? That was really sweet of her."

"They got shipped here a few weeks ago. I forgot I stashed them in the other room," Izzie said. "Open them."

"Okay." Meredith set the present from Addison on her lap and tore off the gift wrap, then opened the clothing box inside. "Oh my God, these are adorable," she all but squeaked. "Derek, look."

"What is it?" Lexie asked.

Meredith held up a tiny, gray pea coat with black buttons, and matching boots to go with it. "I love these. We didn't buy much winter stuff yet because she's a warm weather baby, so now we have something for her winter wardrobe."

Callie laughed. "How very… Addison of her."

"Any Louboutins in there?" Mark chuckled, taking a bite of the ice cream cake with the pink frosting Izzie had special ordered for the baby shower.

"Your ex has nice taste, Shepherd." Cristina held up her beer in a toast then downed the last of the bottle.

Meredith bit her lip, smoothing her fingers of the soft material of the outfit. "I really appreciate this. This is… it was just really nice of her."

"Any idea what Mom got, Derek?" Mark asked.

"No idea," Derek said. "She told me she was sending something, but she didn't say what it was."

"You can open it," Meredith offered, sliding the two pink boxes over to him. She'd opened every present at his insistence – probably so she would be the center of attention, not him – so if there was one gift he should open, it should be the gift from his own mother.

Derek took the gift off the top and slid the other one back over to her. "How about we each open one?" he said.

"You just like every eye in the room on me," Meredith laughed, pulling the gift box into her lap, or whatever lap she had with her belly taking over most of it.

"I do, actually," he admitted, grinning at her. He unwrapped the first gift, tearing away the paper, and popping open the white box that contained the present. "I can't believe she kept this all these years…" Derek said softly.

"What is it?" Meredith asked. She peeked into the box and smiled. "Is that a music box?"

"Yeah." Derek picked it up and examined it in his hands. A tiny, wooden box with circus animals painted on it, with a wind up dial on the bottom, something he hadn't seen since he was a child.

"Was this yours?"

"Yeah. I got it when I was born. My grandparents gave it to me." Derek wound up the little brass dial and lifted the lid. When a soft, familiar lullaby starting playing, he smiled, trying to blink back the tears that stung in his eyes. "Still works. The little elephants still spin, too."

Meredith kissed her husband's cheek and smiled at him. "We can put it right in Lilly's room."

Derek looked over at her, laughing softly. "Yeah."

"You had a music box, Derek?" Arizona asked.

"A long time ago," Derek stressed, making sure to clarify that fact. "I haven't seen this since I was in grade school. He set it gently back in the box. "I'm surprised my mom kept it this long."

"Of course she did. She keeps everything from our childhoods," Mark pointed out. "I'm not even a blood relative, and to this day, she has one of my macaroni Christmas tree ornaments that she puts on the tree every year."

"She's a pretty great mom," Derek said, making a mental note to call her later and thank her for sending it all the way to Seattle for her granddaughter. "Open that one," he said, cocking his head toward the unopened box Meredith held.

For what felt like the hundredth time in the past hour, Meredith peeled off the wrapping paper and opened the gift box inside. This time, no matter how much she fought them, the tears came anyway. "Oh, Derek," she whispered. "This is beautiful."

She picked up the neatly folded pink chenille blanket from the tissue paper and held it in front of her to get a better look. "Her name is embroidered on it," Meredith sniffled, thumbing over the handwritten white letters stitched on the right hand corner of the blanket. _Lilly Grace_.

"Let's see," Lexie prompted.

Meredith passed it to her sister, then rested her head on Derek's shoulder. "I love your mom."

"Hmm, me too."

Meredith leaned into him and sighed contentedly. It didn't matter to them that there was a room full of people probably staring at them. "Three more weeks, Der."

Derek kissed the top of her head. "Three more weeks."


	97. Closer Every Day

**Disclaimer: If I owned Grey's, Thursday's show would have ended differently.  
**

Meredith leaned against the wall of Lilly's nursery with a spoon and her pint of Chunky Monkey ice cream, watching as Derek pushed the crib to the designated spot between the two windows. The ice cream was helping to distract her from how ridiculously sexy her husband was as he arranged the nursery furniture and worked up a sweat while doing so.

"This a good spot?" Derek asked, wiping the perspiration off his forehead with the back of his hand.

She spooned more ice cream into her mouth and cocked her head. "Hmm… yeah. I like it there."

"Okay," Derek nodded. "What about the changing table?"

"I guess we can put that… where I'm standing. On the opposite side of the crib, by the door," Meredith suggested, moving out of the way so Derek could push the white changing table that matched the crib to the right spot.

After Derek finished lugging it over, he leaned against the wall, smiling at Meredith when she handed him their bottle of water. "Thanks."

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair and kissed his cheek. "I think you need a shower."

"I do," Derek chuckled. "If I knew how heavy baby furniture was, I would've called Mark and asked him for help."

"I could help you," she offered.

Derek glanced over at her. "You're thirty-eight weeks pregnant. You should be sitting."

"I'm not having quints, Derek," Meredith pointed out. "Dr. Halloran doesn't even think she'll be more than six or seven pounds."

"I know. I just worry, that's all," Derek said, capping the water bottle and handing it back to her.

Meredith wrapped her arms around him and hugged him, despite his sweatiness. "I know. And I appreciate it," she murmured into his chest. "But I promise, Lilly and I are just fine."

Derek noticed her missing wedding ring, and he frowned. "Where's your ring?"

"I'm planning to go clubbing later, and I don't want any of the hot guys there to know I have a husband," Meredith teased him.

He smirked. "Clubbing, huh?"

"Oh, yeah. Belly and all… every guy loves an available pregnant girl," she giggled. "No, my fingers are just swollen. Damn water retention. I'm all bloaty."

"You don't look bloaty," Derek assured her.

"You're lying, but I appreciate the love behind it," she smiled. "Okay, get back to work. The sooner we finish, the sooner we can take a bath together."

"Bath?"

"Yeah. Why?" Meredith asked, returning to her ice cream.

"Is that safe?"

"That's an old wives tale. Pregnant women can take baths right up to delivery day. They're supposed to help with backaches, too," Meredith said, recalling what she'd read in one of their pregnancy books.

Derek moved the rocking chair over into the corner of the room, smiling. "Hmm, we haven't taken a bath together in a long time."

"I know. Which is why we need one," Meredith said. "Okay, I'm going to put this back in the freezer. Want a beer or something?"

"Yeah, thanks," Derek said, loose tendrils of sweaty curls sticking to the back of his neck.

Meredith weaved her fingers through them and bit her lip. "I have to tell you, I'm kinda turned on."

"Everything I do turns you on," Derek reminded her. "Folding laundry, shaving, cleaning out the fridge…"

"Hmm, you're walking sex," Meredith said, patting his ass. "If we weren't standing in our daughter's nursery, I'd probably just mount you, right here, right now."

"Cruel."

Meredith smiled as she walked out of the room. "I know."

When she returned minutes later, she was holding a laundry basket full of baby clothes, his bottle of beer tossed on top. Derek looked at her in practical horror, his eyes wide in disbelief.

"What?" she asked, setting the basket down on the dresser.

"Mer, you're not supposed to be lifting anything heavy," he said as she handed him the beer.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "The basket weighs, like, two pounds. I didn't lug a piano up the steps," she said, opening the closet doors and pulling out a hanger. "After the baby shower yesterday, there's tons of new clothes I have to wash. I want to put all of these away so I don't mix anything up."

Derek blinked. "Wow."

"What?"

"You," he chuckled. "You're covered in mommy."

Meredith hung one of Lilly's dresses on a tiny pink hanger and smirked at him. "Shut up."

"Just saying…"

"That's because I'm stuck here all day, surgery-deprived, with nothing better to do than wash baby clothes and alphabetize the cereal cabinet," Meredith said, taking a handful of folded socks and dropping them into a dresser drawer.

"I'm not making fun. I think it's adorable," Derek grinned. "You really alphabetized the cereal cabinet?"

"Apple Jacks, Captain Crunch, Cheerios, Honey Bunches of Oats, Lucky Charms, Mini Wheats, Muesli, Raisin Bran, Total," Meredith listed.

Derek nodded proudly. "Very impressive."

Meredith flung one of the baby-sized headbands at him and laughed. "Okay, the mocking? Uncalled for."

"I'm serious." Derek leaned down and picked up the flowery, yellow headband off the carpet. "How many headbands does she have?"

"Your sisters sent some. And Izzie got us some. And then I bought some. So… a lot," Meredith said, smiling. "I even have a dark gray one to match the coat Addison got her. By the way, we need to call her. And your mom," Meredith said. "Oh, and all your sisters."

"Bath first; calls later," Derek said, wiping some sweat from his brow.

"You just want to get me in the bathtub," Meredith said, hanging a purple sundress in Lilly's closet.

Derek smiled, his beer raised to his lips. "I thought that was implied in the statement," he said. "Is that it for the furniture?"

Meredith surveyed the room, looking everything over, then nodded in satisfaction. "Yeah. Now it's just the little things. We need to line the closet shelves in that pink and yellow paper, put all of her bedding in the crib, organize the changing table, decorate the shelves with pictures, and…"

Derek walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. "How about we do all of that later?"

"Because we're on a roll," Meredith said. "What if she's born before you get around to lining her closet shelves?"

"I'm sure she'll forgive me," Derek chuckled. "Come on, do it for me. You should be resting, anyway. Remember what Dr. Halloran said about cervical pressure?"

"That's the least sexy thing you've ever said to me," Meredith giggled. She put her palms on his cheeks and kissed him. "But fine, you win. We can finish this later," she said, setting down the hanger in her hand on a pile of yet-to-be-hung baby outfits.

Derek sighed audibly in relief. "Thank you."

"Bath now?" she asked.

"Yes." He had his shirt off before they left the nursery, and flung it into the hamper as soon as they entered their own bedroom. "Mind if go rinse off in the shower first? I don't want to contaminate the bath water with my sweat."

"Jeez, you're just full of sexy comments today," Meredith teased him. "Yeah, that'd be good. Wait, unhook my bra first?" she requested.

"Yeah," Derek said, walking over and easily undoing it for her.

Her swollen breasts fell free, and she rolled her shoulders, practically humming in pleasure. "Thank you," she said. She gently ran her hands over her chest. "I always wondered what it'd be like having a D-cup. Surprisingly not a fan…"

Derek kicked off his jeans, smiling sympathetically at her. "Sore?"

"Very."

"The bath should help," Derek said.

Meredith bit her lip admiringly when he shuffled his boxers down his legs, leaving him naked in front of her. "Well, this helps too," she giggled, gesturing to his body. "Thank you for stripping in front of me."

Derek laughed. "You're welcome."

"Okay, go get in the shower before I pin you down on the bed and have my way with you," she said, trailing her fingers down his back then grabbing his ass.

He jumped as her nails gently pressed into his skin. "Okay, okay. Going."

She let go and smiled. "Good."

While Derek was quickly rinsing off in the shower, Meredith tiptoed into the bathroom. She saw the small scattering of candles lining the tub, grabbed a pack of matches from the cabinet, and lit them one by one. Considering this was likely to be their last bath together before the baby was born, pulling out all the stops seemed like a good idea.

She shed the rest of her clothes and tossed them into the hamper on top of Derek's just as the shower shut off. Steam fogged the mirrors as soon as he opened the glass door, dripping wet and delicious looking. Meredith tugged on her bottom lip with her teeth. "Wow."

Derek wiped some wet curls of hair off his forehead and grinned at her. "All for you, dear."

"Shut up," Meredith said, rolling her eyes. She turned on the nozzles and warm water began filling the tub, cascading violently out of the spigot until it was full.

Derek stepped in first to turn off the water, then reached out his hand. "Careful," he advised, helping her step over the lip of the tub. When he knew her feet were planted firmly on the floor, they sat down together, slowly, his hand never leaving hers.

"I'm not a frail old lady," Meredith said playfully once they were settled in the warm water.

"No, you're pregnant. That's even scarier," Derek upheld. He pressed his lips to her shoulder and she leaned into him, her back against his torso. "It's my job to keep you and Lilly safe."

Meredith took his hand and put it over her belly, the top of it barely covered by the water. "I know Dr. Halloran said she's tiny, but I swear, she must weigh ten pounds," she said.

"No, you're just tiny, too. You started showing at three months," Derek reminded her, twirling a few pieces of her hair between his fingers after it slipped from her clip.

"I don't know how women walk around with twins inside them, let alone seven or eight." She shuddered. "I've been watching a lot of Discovery Health lately… fertility pills are no joke."

"Honestly, I was sweating it out at our first ultrasound. Twins run in the Shepherd lineage. I know fraternal twins are genetically determined by the mother, but still. I knew if there were two little embryos in there, you'd blame my penis," Derek chuckled.

Meredith smiled at him. "Yes, I probably would have."

"Well, Lilly has Shepherd DNA, which means she could have twins one day," Derek said. "And if we have another daughter, she could too. You and I might have an army's worth of grandkids, Mer."

"Not for many, many years." She looked down at her belly. "Not until you're at least thirty. And married. And have a good career so you can take care of your parents when we're old."

"You mean you don't want her to pick up a guy at a bar, take him home for sex, and fall in love with him?" Derek asked, grinning at her. "Because that worked out pretty well for us."

"If he turns out to be the love of her life, then fine. I'll make that exception. But not sex. They can get to know each other over a casual cup of coffee in public," Meredith giggled.

"Agreed," Derek said, reaching for the loofah.

Meredith handed him a large purple bottle of soap. "It's Lilly's. Or it will be. Dr. Halloran said to use really mild soap to avoid infections. I don't want my you-know-what to be all you-know-what when I have to push out a baby in two weeks."

"Okay," he laughed softly. He squirt some of the lavender-chamomile soap onto the loofah and massaged it in with his fingers until it got bubbly. "This smells really good."

"It's what our daughter is going to smell like. I have bedtime bath, too. Oh, and body lotion for her," Meredith said, dropping her head forward as Derek ran the sponge over her neck and back. She sighed contentedly. "Hmm, you're really good at that."

"Happy to do it," he said. "Is your back always sore?"

"Just when I stand for a long time. I used to be able to handle fifteen hours in the OR on my feet. Even thinking about that makes me tired now."

"Imagine how tired it'll make you when we're up all night with a baby," Derek said.

"That's why I'm glad you get paternity leave," she laughed, tapping the surface of the water with her fingers. "I'll have no idea what the hell I'm doing. I need you here with me."

Derek ran the loofah over her shoulders, smiling when he saw her skin prickle with goose bumps. "I've never been a parent before. I have no idea either."

"Yeah, but you've been around babies for years. How many diapers have you changed in your life?" she asked.

"I dunno. Hundreds?" he shrugged.

"Exactly. Between Kyle and Laura, I think I've changed a whopping seven diapers."

"You can singlehandedly remove an aneurysm. After Lilly's first diaper, you'll be a pro," Derek assured her.

Meredith spun around to face him, looping her legs around his waist. "I'm glad I get to be a parent with you," she said softly, smoothing her hands over his shoulders. "I wouldn't want to do any of this with someone else. I actually can't imagine doing this with anyone else."

"Me either."

She rested her forehead against his and closed her eyes. "I'm due in fourteen days. Two weeks from right now, we could be at the hospital."

"Maybe even sooner than that," Derek said.

Meredith splashed water on him and laughed. "Don't even say that."

"What? Thirty-seven weeks is technically considered full term, and you're already thirty-eight weeks," he reminded her. "I'm just saying, we might be meeting her sooner than you think."

"I know; I guess I just want her to cook a little longer, especially if she just hit the six pound mark. Most babies are almost seven pounds by now," Meredith said.

"Mer, she's completely healthy. She's just tiny. She takes after you," he said.

"The rational part of me knows that. But my irrational mommy brain can't stop worrying about her…"

"Guess what?"

"What?"

Derek smiled. "That's what moms do."

"Well, how would I know that?" Meredith smirked at him.

"Aah, right. Unstable childhood."

"Yes," she agreed.

"She's happy as a clam in your uterus," he chuckled. "Happy and safe and warm. Remember the ultrasound picture where she was using your placenta as a pillow, sucking her thumb? It's a charmed life in there."

Meredith looked down at her belly under the water. "She's kind of amazing, isn't she?"

"She really is," Derek said, pressing his lips to her neck and trailing the tips of his fingers down her back, still covered with bubbles.

Meredith arched into him, her belly pressed to his torso. "We can't have sex in here."

"I'm not trying to have sex," he laughed against her skin. "I'm just helping you relax."

"Hmm, well, it's working," she smiled, resting her head on his shoulder while he rubbed her back. "Keep it up and I'll probably fall asleep in here."

"Tired?" he asked.

Meredith tapped her fingers against his back and smiled. "Lately? Always. And horny. And hungry."

"We can have sex first if you want. Afterward, you could take a nap while I make dinner," Derek offered. "Will that work?"

"What's for dinner?"

Derek shrugged. "Anything. What do you want?"

"Spaghetti," she said almost instantly, always well in tune with her cravings.

"Okay."

"Then yes," Meredith said. "That works."

…

Meredith had read in a book once that sex dwindled towards the end of pregnancy. Wrong. Her hormones amped up her desire for sex to indescribable levels, so much so that it took two rounds to satisfy her. "Crap. I. Yeah. Wow," she panted, resting her head on his chest.

Derek kissed her forehead, trying to regain his breath. "Yeah."

"That's just the kickoff party to the next fourteen days."

"Yeah?"

Meredith pressed her nose into his neck and nodded. "Mmhmm," she hummed. "To make up for the fact that I'm off sex for six weeks after."

"That's only forty-two days," Derek said.

"Have we ever gone more than five or six days without it?" she asked. "Since we've been back together, I mean."

Derek pursed his lips. "No," he admitted. "We won't even be thinking about sex anyway. Just Lilly and sleep."

"Oh, I didn't mean for me. I meant for you. You're the insatiable one," Meredith said.

"Me?"

She laughed. "Yes, you."

"And what about you?" he smirked.

"You really think I'll want sex after I push a baby out of my body? I'll be lucky if I can walk without looking like I just got done riding a horse," she teased.

"Just because I'm not doing the pushing doesn't mean I won't be too tired for it either," Derek defended. "This is a team sport. You just happen to be the one with the girl parts."

Meredith trailed her fingers through the soft hairs on his chest and hugged him to her. "I know," she yawned. "And I appreciate it. You're a good teammate."

"Believe me, I appreciate what you have to do in two weeks," Derek said as he kissed along her hairline. "I mean, you're already the strongest person I know. But seeing you give birth to our daughter…"

"Hmm, just don't pass out on me. 'Cause I need you, okay?" she giggled. "Cristina wouldn't be a very good labor coach."

"No passing out," Derek promised. "I'll be right there, the whole time. Just us." He paused. "Cristina didn't reserve floor space in the delivery room, right?"

Meredith laughed, shaking her head. "No, she didn't. When it comes time to push, all visitors will be banished to the other side of the door."

"Good."

She felt Lilly kick, and rubbed her hand over her belly slowly. "I know it's tight in there. Just a couple more weeks. I promise, it's a lot roomier out here."

Derek glanced down at her belly and his eyes went wide when he saw what looked like a footprint from the inside. "Holy crap. Mer, look!"

"What? What's the matter?"

"Her foot," Derek pointed in awe. "I can see her foot."

"What?" Meredith looked down at her belly and gasped, quickly sitting up against the headboard. "Holy crap."

"That's what I said," Derek laughed. "We need to get a picture of this."

"Derek, I'm naked."

Derek reached for his phone off the nightstand and shrugged. "Just your stomach, nothing else. Please?"

Meredith smiled. "Okay."

After he snapped the picture, he showed her. "Look. Pretty cool, huh?"

"Send that to your email so we can have it blown up bigger," Meredith said, her eyes trailing back to her bare belly. Lilly kicked again, harder now, and pressed her foot into Meredith's skin. "Oh my God, I can see her toes this time. Derek, get a picture!"

Derek took the photo, and proudly set it as his new background image. "We have the coolest baby ever."

Meredith traced her finger over Lilly's foot indentations against her skin and bit her lip, trying to hold back her tears, but with no luck. "Look how tiny, Derek," she whispered.

"I know," Derek breathed. He, too, traced his finger over the imprint Lilly was making, awestruck. "God, she's like… this perfect little person."

She saw the love for their baby stamped all over her husband's face, and Meredith smiled. Only she knew how he felt, and only she knew how he would feel on the day she was born, when they could actually see those little toes for real. Meredith leaned into him. "Yeah."

**Yeah, that stuff happens. YouTube it. ;)**


	98. Waddling and a Wedding

**Disclaimer: It's not mine.**

**Thanks for the reviews! I appreciate each and every one! So, my last semester of college is officially in progress, which means less time for writing, but I'm doing my best. I'll update as often as I can. I know everyone is anxious for Lilly to get here, myself included. Thanks for you patience!  
**

The last wedding they'd gone to was nearly eight months ago, on the night of which Meredith found out she was pregnant. And today was another wedding, a mere seven days away from her due date. Her bump had gone from nonexistent to highly unmistakable, overtaking her body. As much as Meredith loved being pregnant, she wanted nothing more than to meet their little girl. Getting her figure back would be nice, too.

"Ugh. Stupid. Why did I think this was a good idea?" she huffed, sitting on the couch with her feet propped up on the coffee table. She thumped the bottle of nail polish down harder than was necessary, and leaned back in defeat.

Derek walked downstairs, freshly showered and looking ridiculously handsome even in his tee shirt and shorts. He kissed the top of her head after entering the living room. "Hey. You okay?"

"Fine, except for the fact that I can't paint my toenails, because I can barely reach them," Meredith said.

"That shirt looks really cute on you," Derek grinned. He dropped down next to her on the couch and picked up her bottle of rosy, pink nail polish off the table.

Meredith smoothed his Yankees tee shirt over her belly and sighed amusedly. "Yeah, I'm trying out a new look," she joked. "All of my shirts are too tight. Yours are comfy. And they don't squish my boobs."

Derek pulled her feet up onto the couch and set them both in his lap. When he opened the nail polish bottle, she laughed. "What're you doing?"

"Painting your toes," Derek said. "Now hold still."

"You don't have to do that," Meredith replied, though she knew he wouldn't listen.

Derek smiled as he applied the pink polish with surgical precision on her big toe. "Yes, I do," he said. "What kind of husband would I be if I didn't?"

"A normal husband," Meredith teased him.

"Guess I'm not normal then," he chuckled. "Besides, we're having a daughter. I need to learn how to do this girly stuff."

Meredith relaxed into the pillows. If he wanted to pamper her, she wasn't about to stop him. "Hmm, that's true."

"Pretty color."

"It matches my dress. Oh, by the way, did you write your toast yet?" Meredith asked.

"Yes, I did. And I made sure to make it just as hilarious as his was for our wedding," Derek said, dipping the brush back in the bottle.

"Oh, you mean how he dropped that fun little anecdote about catching us having sex in the linen closet? In front of your mom? Oh, and the Chief?" she assumed, laughing.

Derek nodded. "Yep."

"Yeah, that was really sweet of him," Meredith said playfully. She felt the familiar sensation of a Braxton Hicks contraction rolling through her, and she inhaled slowly.

Derek looked up from her toes, his eyes etched with worry. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just another Braxton Hicks," she told him. "I'm fine."

"Mer…"

"It's not labor. They don't hurt," Meredith promised. Once it passed a few seconds later, she smiled. "See? Totally fine."

Derek cocked his head at her, unconvinced.

"Okay, you can stop with the face. And you're not examining my cervix to double check, either," she said, reaching for her glass of orange juice off the table. "Just… keep painting."

"If your water breaks during the ceremony—"

"…Then you can say 'I told you so,'" Meredith said. "But it's not going to. I already told Lilly not to come on the day of her Uncle Mark and Aunt Bridget's wedding. Anytime after that is fair game."

"Uh huh."

Meredith smirked. "Don't say 'uh huh' like that. Lilly's okay. I'm okay." She hoisted herself forward and kissed his cheek. "And it's really sweet that you're worried."

"Of course I'm worried," Derek said. "Which is why I'm not leaving your side all day. Except, you know, when I'm standing next to Mark on the altar."

"Cristina is sitting next to me in the pew. She'll fill in for you," Meredith appeased him.

"Good. That makes me feel better," Derek nodded.

"Two coats," Meredith said when she saw Derek screwing the lid back on the bottle of her nail polish. She wiggled her toes at him and smiled. "You're doing an excellent job."

Derek laughed. "Thank you."

"Do you give back massages, too?" Meredith asked.

"_Naked_ back massages?" He raised his eyebrows at her.

"Okay," she shrugged. "I'm not picky."

"Then it's a date. Naked back massage after we get home from the wedding reception tonight. You know, as long as your water doesn't break on the dance floor…" he joked.

Meredith narrowed her eyes playfully at him. "Shut up."

…

Derek pulled into the parking lot of the church and maneuvered their car into one of the spots near the entrance. The less Meredith had to walk today, the better, especially considering her Braxton Hicks contractions that were popping up more and more frequently.

"Ready?" he asked.

Meredith slipped her feet, complete with shiny, pink nail polish on her toes, into her gold flip flops. Wearing heels was out of the question, not to mention an impossibility. "Yep," she said.

Just as they got out of the car, Owen's pulled into the spot next to theirs. "Hey," he called from the window.

"Wait for us," Cristina said.

After getting out of their car, Cristina walked over to them, her eyes wide as she looked at Meredith. "Damn it. Someone's a MILF," she greeted. "Your boobs are enormous."

Meredith looked down at herself in her pink sundress, and smiled. "Yes, thank you."

"That's Cristina's way of saying hello," Owen chuckled, hitting the lock button on his key fob.

"Yeah, she's charming," Derek teased.

"Oh my God," Cristina said as she glanced into the window of the backseat of their car. "Is that a car seat?"

"Um, yes…" Derek replied.

"Holy crap."

Meredith laughed. "What?"

"No, nothing, it's just," Cristina searched for the right words. "That makes it real."

"You should see our house. Two baby swings, baby monitors, diapers, pacifiers…" Derek said. He put his hand on the small of Meredith's back and they headed for the entrance to the church. "Lilly isn't even born yet, and she's already taken over everything."

"I still can't believe you're gonna have a baby in a week. Kinda freaks me out," Cristina said.

"Us, too," Meredith echoed. "We really can't wait."

Cristina snorted. "Can't wait for the crying, pooping miracle to arrive?"

"Hey, that crying, pooping miracle is your goddaughter," Derek reminded her, opening the church door and letting the three of them pass through before he entered, too.

"Where are you meeting Mark?" Meredith asked.

Derek cocked his head toward the short hallway to their right. "In the dressing room. I'll see you out there." He kissed her cheek, then turned toward Cristina and Owen. "If my wife goes into labor during the ceremony, will one of you call an ambulance?"

Meredith elbowed him in the side and rolled her eyes. "I told you, I'm fine. Now go do your best man thing. Mark needs you," she said, giving him a small pat on the ass.

"Alright," Derek agreed. "I love you."

She smiled. "Love you, too."

Owen opened one of the double doors leaning into the chapel and gestured for them to go in. "Are you having contractions?" Cristina asked.

"Thank you," Meredith said to Owen. "Braxton Hicks. I'm surprised he didn't insist on pushing me around in a wheelchair today."

"If your water does break, try not to get any amniotic fluid on me," Cristina requested as the three of them scooted into the pew where Alex and Izzie were already seated.

"I'll do my best," Meredith said.

"Hey," Izzie smiled. "Good God, Mer. Pregnancy really freaking agrees with you."

"MILF, right?" Cristina said.

Alex whistled. "Nice rack, Grey."

"We're in church," Meredith reminded him. "But thank you. That's very sweet of you, Alex."

"Hey, guys," Lexie said, entering the pew behind them, George sliding in next to her.

Izzie smiled at the two of them. "Hey. You guys look nice."

"Thanks," Lexie said. "I wasn't sure at first because the dress is kind of low cut, but with Mer here, no one will be looking at _my_ boobs," she laughed.

Meredith turned around in the pew, mouth agape in feigned insult. "My boobs do not look _that_ big," she defended.

"They kinda do," Izzie said gently. "But not in a slutty way. In a glowy, pregnant way."

"I'm sure Shepherd enjoys them…" Alex said, mindlessly flipping through the wedding program book.

"I let him look, but not touch," Meredith said. "They'll all swollen and sore and leaky."

Owen laughed. "This is what you guys talk about in church?"

"Yeah, pretty much," George said regretfully.

"What else are we gonna talk about? The pretty flowers or the stained glass windows?" Cristina said sarcastically. "Sadly, Mer's boobs are about the most interesting things here."

"The church does look nice," Lexie said. "Bridget has good taste."

"I bet Sloan's only interested in getting laid tonight," Alex joked. "Probably why it looks like Barbie's dream church in here…"

Izzie nudged him with her hip. "Oh, stop. They're in love."

"Mark's totally changed since he met her," Lexie agreed. "He's…"

"Not a manwhore anymore?" Alex offered as he checked his watch.

"Exactly," Izzie nodded.

Meredith smiled. "I knew from the second I met her that she was the one. MFEO."

"MFEO?" Owen echoed.

"Made for each other," Meredith clarified. "It's the same way I feel about Derek. It was never just about sex. It was always more than that."

"Oh, God," Cristina said, disgusted.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"It's official. Your heart lives in your vagina," Cristina stated.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "It does not. A baby just lives in my uterus. That's all."

"Same thing," Cristina upheld.

"So, baby equals heart, and uterus equals vagina?" Izzie assumed.

Cristina shrugged. "Metaphorically, not literally."

Bailey shooed George over in the pew and took a seat next to him. "Did I just hear the word vagina… at a wedding… in a church?" she asked, adjusting the front of her blue dress.

"Yes," Lexie admitted. "But Cristina started it."

Arizona and Callie entered from the other side of the pew, and sat down next to Lexie. "Hey," Arizona waved. "It looks beautiful in here, doesn't it? The flowers are gorgeous. Are those peonies?"

"See? Aren't you bored already?" Cristina asked Owen. "Admit it, Mer's boobs make for a better conversation."

"Why are you talking about Meredith's boobs?" Callie asked, laughing.

"Dude, have you seen them?" Alex asked.

"Okay. Let's get all the boob jokes out now. Deep down, I know you're all just jealous of my amazing rack… men excluded," Meredith said teasingly, looking down at her breasts. "And the sooner you can admit that, the better."

"We've already established that you're a MILF. Embrace it," Alex encouraged, reaching around Izzie to pat Meredith's shoulder.

The music from the piano started up, and Owen and George audibly sighed in relief. "I'm glad that conversation is over…" George said.

Owen shook his head. "You and me both."

…

It was halfway through the ceremony, right before the vows, that Meredith felt another Braxton Hicks coming on. She rubbed her hands over her belly and inhaled deeply. Just as the tightening feeling started, Derek glanced over at her from his place next to Mark on the altar. His smile quickly dissolved when he saw the look on her face. He knew it well. It was her Braxton Hicks face.

Meredith saw him, and she smiled at him in reassurance. "I'm okay," she mouthed.

Cristina looked over at her, then to Derek, then back again. "You okay?" she murmured.

"Yeah," Meredith said as she exhaled. "Braxton Hicks."

"You sure?" Cristina asked.

"Yes, I'm sure," Meredith replied. Once it passed, she gave Derek a thumbs up and smiled. "I'm good," she mouthed again.

Derek swallowed thickly and nodded subtly at her. He wasn't going to interrupt the wedding to make sure she was okay, so he had to take her word for it. But if it happened again, he decided, all bets were off.

But by the time the minister pronounced Mark and Bridget as husband and wife, she hadn't had any more, something Derek was thanking his lucky stars for. Having to escort his laboring wife out of a wedding ceremony wasn't high up on the list of things he wanted to do.

"Hey," Meredith said, smiling when he walked over to her on the front steps of the church after everyone had processed outside. "You're a very good best man."

"Thank you," he chuckled. He took her hand as they walked over to Mark and Bridget. "How are you and Lilly?"

"We're fine, I promise. I was hoping I wouldn't have a Braxton Hicks during the ceremony because I knew how much you'd worry, but of course… I did," she sighed.

Derek kissed her cheek. "Now that the wedding's over, I'm not leaving your side all day," he joked.

"That's okay. You're free to hover," Meredith said, squeezing his hand.

"Hey!" Bridget called out happily. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Why wouldn't we be here? We love you guys. And you look beautiful," Meredith said, hugging Bridget as best she could with her belly getting in the way, then hugging Mark, too.

"Well, you're all waddly and pregnant. We would've understood," Mark said.

Meredith smiled. "It's your wedding day, so I'll let the 'waddly' comment slide," she laughed. "Actually, I feel good. And Derek is watching me like a hawk, so don't worry."

"No hard feelings if you pop the kid out today. Bridget and I don't mind sharing our anniversary with her birthday," Mark grinned.

"Lilly knows not to come today. She and Mer have a deal," Derek said, making sure Meredith caught the teasing smirk plastered on his face.

Meredith felt Lilly wriggling around in her belly, and felt the daily head-butt to the bladder. She winced, and Derek's eyes flashed with concern. "Mer, what?"

"Damn, are you in labor?" Mark asked nervously.

Meredith sighed. "If someone asks me if I'm in labor one more time, I'm gonna lose it," she said. "No, I just need to pee."

"Go, go," Bridget said, waving back towards the doors of the church. "You look so pretty. You don't need to pee on the dress," she laughed. "We'll see you guys at the reception."

Derek patted Mark's back, then kissed Bridget's cheek. "Alright, we'll see you. And congrats again."

"Thank you, Derek," Bridget smiled.

"You were a good best man, Shep. Not as good as I was, but close," Mark joked.

"And hey, you'll be a godfather in seven days," Meredith reminded him as she and Derek started walking back up the steps toward the church entrance.

Mark shrugged. "Or maybe even tonight. You never know…"

Meredith playfully pointed her finger at him in warning. "I mean it, I will hurt you."

…

"This place is really nice," Meredith complimented, taking her seat at the round table in the reception hall.

"How'd you guys get into the Andover Hotel? Isn't there like a year long waiting list for this place?" Derek asked.

"We were on that list until a few months ago, but apparently, another couple changed their wedding date to the fall, so I jumped on booking this as fast as I could," Bridget explained.

Mark laughed. "Maybe we should've just had the reception at Joe's. Close to hospital in case of… pregnancy-related surprises."

"Haha," Meredith said dryly. She felt the need to pee—again—and used Derek's shoulder for leverage to get out of her chair.

"Where are you going?" Derek asked.

"Bathroom. Have to pee. Again," she sighed amusedly.

"Damn, Grey. I swear you have to pee every five minutes. We should just get you a catheter," Mark said before taking a drink from his water glass.

"I'd love one. Have one with you?" Meredith giggled. She draped her hand over her belly and smiled. "I'll be right back."

Cristina caught up with her on her way to the bathroom and smirked. "Peeing again, are we?" she assumed.

"Yes, I am," Meredith replied. "I'm so tired of peeing. It's exhausting."

"Okay, you think peeing is exhausting?" Cristina said, holding the bathroom door open and allowing Meredith to enter first. "Wait till you have a mewling, poo-covered infant hanging off of your boobs twenty-four-seven."

Meredith laughed as they each went into a stall. "Why is my baby going to be poo-covered?"

"Aren't all babies?"

"Not my baby," Meredith said, sighing in audible relief as she emptied her bladder.

"Are you gonna break out those famous Meredith dance moves?" Cristina asked.

"Shut up." After fixing her dress, she unlocked the stall and joined Cristina at the line of sinks. "I used to be kickass at the limbo. I won every time. Now I can't even paint my own toes," she giggled.

Cristina looked down at her feet. "Your toes are painted."

"Derek did them this morning," Meredith said, smiling. "Admit it, he did a good job."

"Eh, not bad," Cristina relented.

"And if I'm not completely exhausted when we get home, he's getting sex for it."

"You two still do the nasty-nasty?" Cristina asked.

Meredith dried her hands off with a paper towel and laughed. "Why wouldn't we?"

"Just seems like it would be complicated," Cristina shrugged.

They exited the bathroom and started walking back toward the cluster of tables. "I sit at home all freaking day watching daytime television and eating entire boxes of cereal. I practically pounce on Derek the second he walks through the front door," Meredith giggled.

"And it's still, you know, good?" Cristina prodded.

"All of the extra blood flow and hormones? Hell yeah it is," Meredith replied. "I'm hornier than a sixteen year old boy. Seriously, I recommend getting pregnant just for the sex."

"I'll keep that in mind."

Meredith retook her seat next to Derek, smiling in excitement when she saw that the salad and dinner rolls had arrived. "This food looks delicious," she said.

"Get this… chocolate wedding cake with butter cream frosting," Derek grinned, knowing how ridiculously happy that would make her.

"Okay. This is officially the best wedding ever," Meredith decided, spreading a glob of butter onto her dinner roll. "You two should be wedding planners," she told Mark and Bridget as she chewed.

"Mer is very passionate about food," Derek said.

Meredith looked over at him and narrowed her eyes. "Don't mock me."

"You made me go to Taco Bell at four in the morning last week. I get to mock you a little bit," Derek defended before taking a bite of salad.

"You're so whipped," Mark said, patting Derek's shoulder.

"You're married now," Meredith said. "So are you."

"Hey, guys," Callie said, walking up to the table. "I'm heading over to the bar. Anyone need a drink?"

Mark and Bridget both shook their heads. "Nah, we're good. Thanks, Torres," Mark said.

"No, I'll stick with water," Derek smiled. "But thanks. Mer, want anything?"

Meredith rolled her eyes and smirked. "Derek, you can drink. One beer isn't going to inebriate you."

"He's just worried about being drunk if the baby comes," Bridget said.

"I am not," Derek argued.

Callie patted his shoulder. "You so are. It's cute."

"He is cute," Meredith agreed, stealing a tomato off of his salad plate. "Oh! Could you get me a cup of maraschino cherries? The bar has those, right?"

"Yeah, I'm sure they do," Callie laughed. "Coming right up."

"That's gross," Mark chuckled.

"You should see our cabinets. It's like Willa Wonka's Chocolate Factory," Derek said.

Meredith shook her head dramatically. "It does not."

After dinner was served, speeches had been given, and the cake had been cut, guests migrated to the dance floor in the center of the reception hall. The night was winding down, and though Meredith's feet were tired and swollen, she was determined to live it up as best she could.

Derek smiled at her as she danced with Cristina, Izzie and Lexie. Her burgeoning pregnant belly didn't seem to bother her at all. His wife was beautiful.

Mark wandered over to where Derek was sitting, and dropped down into the chair beside him. "Hey," Derek said. "So how's it feel to be a married man?"

"Feels pretty good," Mark grinned. He tapped his beer bottle against Derek's glass of water, and they both took a sip. "Damn, I'm impressed. Mer is due in seven days, and she can still limbo."

Derek glanced over at the dance floor, and saw Meredith triumphantly high-fiving Lexie after she maneuvered her body under the limbo pole. He shook his head in amazement. "Wow, I hope someone was taping that."

"So, uh, thanks… you know, for being here today. Means a lot to me," Mark said sincerely before chuckling to himself. "I'm a husband, and in a few days, I'll be an uncle. What the hell happened to me?"

"You grew up," Derek replied, raising his glass to his friend. "Congrats."

"Thanks, man."

"By the way, you've been an uncle for years. Remember the fifteen nieces and nephews on the east coast that idolize you?" Derek joked.

"Yeah, but this is different. This is _your_ kid. _My goddaughter_," Mark stressed. "That's big."

"I made a human being," Derek grinned, feigning pretentiousness. "Top that."

Meredith walked over to them and picked up her water glass off the table. "Hey, _we_ made a human being," she corrected, pointing to her belly.

"Right. Team effort," he winked at her. "By the way, nice limbo skills."

"Gold medal for that, Grey," Mark complimented, patting her shoulder as he got up and joined Bridget on the dance floor.

"I've always been very flexible."

Derek grinned. "I know."

She held out her hand and smiled. "Wanna dance with me?"

"Love to."

They walked onto the dance floor and Derek splayed his hands over her back, pulling her to him. "This was easier last time," he chuckled.

"That's because Lilly was the size of a blueberry then. And we weren't even sure she existed," Meredith said, draping her arms over his shoulders and settling her hands at the nape of his neck.

Lilly's foot pressed into her side so that even Derek felt it, and his breath caught in his throat. "She definitely exists."

"We could be sitting in a hospital bed in seven days, holding her." Meredith shook her head and laughed softly. "All these months of waiting, and it's really almost over."

"Hmm, T-minus seven days until you detonate," Derek joked. "You know, give or take. Due dates are just estimates."

"Okay, to be clear, you just compared me to a bomb," Meredith smirked. "That's very romantic, Derek."

Derek smiled. "Bad metaphor. I'm a doctor, not a poet."

"Well, clearly," she agreed.

"I meant it with love."

Meredith leaned in and pressed her lips to his. "I know."


	99. Come and Gone

**Disclaimer: I down own it. I just really wish I did sometimes.  
**

**Thanks for your patience! I've been sick on and off for the last half of January, so I wasn't as productive as I could have been with writing. I'm still doing my best to bank chapters, though. Enjoy. :)  
**

May 29th had finally come.

And gone.

The calendar had officially been switched to June now, and they were waiting anxiously for Lilly to finally make her grand entrance. Any day now, she'd be arriving… at least, they hoped so.

Derek rolled onto his other side in bed, careful not to wake Meredith up from her sleep. With her belly as big as it was, it was hard for her to get comfortable lying down, so he tried his best not to jostle her. But when he felt the wet sheet through his clothes, his eyes went wide and he shot up into a sitting position, quickly turning on the lamp on his nightstand.

"Mer, wake up," Derek said softly, gently tapping her shoulder.

Meredith groaned into her pillow. "Hmm, what?"

"The sheet is all wet. Did your water break?" he asked.

"What?" Meredith rolled onto her back and blinked as her eyes adjusted to the light. She felt the wetness that had seeped through her pajamas. "I… what the hell?"

She got out of their bed and Derek flung back the covers, both of them relieved to see that it wasn't blood. "Amniotic fluid is usually clear," Derek said. "This is… yellowish." He paused. "Mer, did you… pee?"

"What?" Meredith leaned down to investigate further, and she was overcome with the scent of urine filling her nostrils. "Oh my God." Her face went crimson and she covered it with her hands.

"Mer, it's fine. Be glad it's just pee," Derek said, trying not to laugh.

Meredith caught the not-so-hidden look of amusement on his face, and she resisted the urge to hit him with her pillow. "Do not laugh at me. This is humiliating."

"It happens," he shrugged. When Meredith looked at him incredulously, he smiled. "It happened to Kathleen when she was pregnant. No biggie."

She groaned in mortification, shimmying out of her wet pajama shorts.

Derek began stripping the sheets and blankets on the bed. "Lilly is pressing right against your bladder. Even the tiniest little kick, and boom, you pee. You were asleep. You couldn't have known," he reminded her.

"I'm incontinent, Derek. Like a ninety year old woman that needs to wear diapers," Meredith said.

"You're not ninety. You're pregnant," Derek said, rolling up the soiled laundry into a ball. He saw the small smile on her face and grinned. "Come on, admit it. It's funny."

"Is not," Meredith upheld. She reached for the laundry pile in his arms. "I'll do those, Der. You have to get up for work in a few hours."

Derek shifted his arms out of her reach and shook his head. "I got it. Besides, I don't have to be in until noon. I'm just scheduled for consults today. Go take a shower. I'll put a new sheet and blanket on while you're getting cleaned up."

"But you're covered in pee," Meredith said, scrunching her nose.

"Soon enough, I'll be covered in baby pee. May as well get used to it. Actually, do you wanna give me your wet clothes? I'll just toss them in with the sheets," Derek offered.

"If I'm getting naked, so are you," she leveraged, pulling her wet tank top over her head.

Derek dropped the bundle of laundry onto the floor and smiled. "Fine," he said. He kicked off his boxers, removed his tee shirt, and tossed them into of the pile.

Meredith flung her panties on top, and she couldn't help but giggle at the absurdity. "Okay, least sexy moment of our marriage…" she said, glancing at the clock. "2:53 AM on June second. Mark it down."

Derek laughed. "You're always sexy to me," he said, picking up the heap of laundry off the floor.

"We're only naked because I wet the bed."

He kissed her cheek. "I love you… and your pregnancy-induced incontinence."

As he left the room, Meredith tossed a throw pillow at him, hitting him in the back of the head. When Derek turned around, his mouth agape in amusement, Meredith just smiled satisfactorily. "You deserved that."

…

When morning finally came, it wasn't a blaring alarm or Charlie licking her face that woke Meredith up. It was the belly burn. She flopped onto her back with a grunt and lifted up Derek's tee shirt that she was wearing, her outfit of choice these past few weeks.

"Apparently, you love the five star accommodations of my uterus, but it'll be just as nice out here too, Lilly," Meredith said softly as she rubbed her hands over her stomach. "So whenever you're ready."

Her stomach grumbled with the need to eat, and she hoisted herself into a sitting position before swinging her legs over the side of the bed. Derek was awake, judging by his absence on the other side of the mattress, and Meredith only hoped he was downstairs cooking breakfast.

She got up, peed, and waddled slowly down the steps. When she reached the landing, Meredith could smell the bacon Derek was cooking, and sighed contentedly.

"Another benefit of being born: your Dad can cook," Meredith said to her belly.

When she walked into the kitchen, she smiled. "Hi."

"Hi," Derek echoed, cracking a few eggs into a bowl and whisking them with a fork.

"What's all this for?" Meredith asked. She gripped the ledge of the island for support, then hopped up onto the stool.

"I just figured Lilly is getting tired of all the Count Chocula every morning," Derek smirked.

Meredith reached for a crispy piece of bacon off the plate and bit into it. "That's because most mornings when I wake up, you've already left for work. Cereal, watching daytime TV, and cleaning out of boredom. It's what I do now."

"You know, most moms-to-be enjoy maternity leave," Derek pointed out.

"I enjoyed it… for a while," she shrugged. "But there's only so much Tyra I can watch, Derek. I know more about that woman than I ever wanted to. And oh my God, don't even get me started on The View…" she ranted.

"Why are you watching those shows then?" Derek asked, laughing.

"Usually it's because the remote is halfway across the room and I don't feel like getting off my ass," Meredith admitted. She reached for his glass of orange juice and took a sip. "By the way, I'm going into work with you today."

Derek looked up from the frying pan, puzzled. "What?"

"I can't sit at home today. Even Charlie is getting sick of me. Aren't you, buddy?" Meredith asked their dog, tossing him a strip of bacon.

"I know you're bored, but you're forty weeks pregnant. Technically you're supposed to be on bed rest," Derek said.

"I _was_ forty weeks pregnant. Now I'm forty and a half weeks pregnant. I'm _overdue_. And Dr. Halloran said walking around is a good way to induce labor," Meredith argued, determined to win this battle.

Derek smiled and crossed his arms over his chest. "You're serious?"

"Damn straight," Meredith nodded. "Can you put cheese on the eggs, please?"

"Mer, Bailey would kick your ass if you showed up at the hospital and_ weren't_ in labor," Derek said. "American cheese?"

"Yeah," she replied. "And she would _not _kick my ass. She had Tuck in the OR gallery when he was two weeks old. She gets it."

Derek wracked his brain for other reasons to dissuade her, though he knew it was probably futile. "Okay, well, what about cervical pressure?" he asked.

Meredith laughed. "Okay, now you're just grasping at straws. Cervical pressure leads to labor. Labor leads to birth. And birth leads to…" she raised her eyebrows at him.

"Lilly. I know," he chuckled, draping a layer of cheese over her scrambled eggs. "Fine. I can't stop you. But if anyone asks, it was your idea."

"Fine."

"So, what are you planning on doing while you're there?" he asked curiously.

"You said you have consults all day. Maybe I'll just hang out with you something," Meredith shrugged. "And after work, we can curl up on the couch, and do nothing all night."

"Okay," Derek grinned, leaning across the island to kiss her. "As long as you don't go into labor before then…"

Meredith smiled against his lips. "I wish."

…

The automatic front doors of Seattle Grace opened with a woosh, and as soon as the familiar hospital smell hit her nose, Meredith thought she might cry tears of joy, even if it was only for a day, and she technically wasn't supposed to be there at all.

"It's so good to be back," she sighed happily.

Derek pushed the button for the elevator and smirked at her. "You're not back. You're sneaking in illegally."

"Same thing," Meredith shrugged, stepping onto the elevator with him. "Seriously, it's like going to Disney World. I don't know what I want to do first."

Derek laughed. "Yeah, because this is just like the Tower of Terror," he teased her.

"Shut up." Meredith nudged him with her hip. "I'll go get changed into my scrubs, then meet you, okay?"

"Alright," Derek agreed. "If you see anyone from HR, run in the opposite direction."

"If they tattle on me, they'll only tell the Chief, and I'm not afraid of him," Meredith stated bravely, stepping off the elevator.

Derek just smiled at her in amusement. "Oookay."

Meredith waddled down the hall toward the resident lounge, catching the glances of confused coworkers staring at her. When Callie spotted her, her eyes went wide and she quickly flipped her chart closed, handing it off to an intern.

"Oh my God, are you in labor?" Callie asked.

"No, just trying to induce it," Meredith said. "I'm tagging along with Derek all day doing consults."

"Grey, are you in labor? Where's Derek? You should've called," Mark said frantically as he caught up with them.

"Not in labor, don't worry," Meredith assured him.

"She's being proactive," Callie explained.

"I'm four days late, and my OB said Lilly hit the six pound mark. I'm ready and she's ready. All we need is labor," Meredith said.

"So you're really not in labor?" Mark had to clarify.

Meredith shook her head. "No, I am not."

Bailey rounded the corner and stopped in her tracks when she saw Meredith standing there. "Grey, what are you doing here?" she asked.

"Crap," Meredith whispered under her breath. She smiled, acting casual. "You know, just… visiting," she shrugged. "How are you?"

"I'm wondering why you aren't sitting in a wheelchair on your way to labor and delivery," Bailey replied. "Does Derek know you're here?"

"Yes, he does. But—"

"Zzzt." Bailey raised her hand in a halting motion. "I'm not getting involved. You wanna break the rules, that's your business. That said, don't get caught."

"I won't," Meredith promised. She felt Lilly kicking her foot in what she assumed was an attempt to get comfortable, and rubbed her hand over her belly. "Lilly says hi."

"Is she kicking?" Callie asked. "Can I feel?"

"Yeah," Meredith said. She took Callie's hand and placed it beneath her ribs, where Lilly was still thudding away with her feet. "She used to be a lot more gymnast-ish, but since she ran out of room, she just stretches every once in a while."

"Oh, Bailey, you should feel this," Callie said.

"Don't tempt me, Torres. I'm not involved," Bailey reminded her.

Mark grinned. "Come on, you know you want to," he coaxed.

"She's going to be born soon. Last chance," Meredith said. "Well, probably not. Lilly seems to enjoy living in me, so you probably have time. Still, feel."

"Fine." Bailey replaced her hand over the spot where Callie's was, and smiled when she felt the baby's movements under her palm. "Hmm, incredible, isn't it?"

"I'm going to miss that once she's born," Meredith said.

"You mean being kicked in the ribs by the tiny human inside you?" Mark joked.

Meredith just smiled. "Yeah, I really am."

"Alright, back to work," Bailey instructed, turning to Meredith. "And Grey, take it easy. If I catch your name on the OR board…"

"What if there's an emergency and I'm desperately needed?" Meredith bargained.

"Then make sure it's a neuro surgery so you can blame your husband," Bailey said.

Meredith nodded. "Deal."

…

It had been a while since Meredith had donned a pair of scrubs, and her belly had only gotten bigger in the past few weeks. She sighed in annoyance as she pulled the tight scrub top back over her head. There was no calculable way it would fit anymore, not until after Lilly was born.

"Damn, stupid…" Meredith huffed, brushing her messy bangs away from her face.

The door to the resident lounge opened, and Derek walked inside, biting back a grin. "Hey. Everything okay?"

"No," she said. "I can't fit into my scrubs."

Derek gave her his 'I told you so' look before finally letting a smile grace his lips. "Hmm, I wonder why…"

"I guess I'll just rummage through the other cubbies until I find a pair that fits," Meredith shrugged.

"Like Goldie Locks?" Derek chuckled. He glanced at his watch. "Hang on. I'll go find you a pair."

"Where?"

"I'm friends with the guy in charge of laundry service," Derek replied.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully, dropping down onto the bench. "Of course you are."

"Do you want the scrubs or not?" he laughed.

"Yes, please."

"Alright, I'll be back," Derek said, kissing the top of her head. "I saw Bailey in a patient room down the hall, so stay put."

"Oh, I already saw her," she said, waving it off. "She just told me to blame you if I get caught."

Derek sighed, amused. "Of course she did."

When Derek returned with a pair of scrubs a few minutes later, Meredith narrowed her eyes at him, confused by what he was handing her. "Those are dark blue," she said.

"Yeah, that's all Fred had," Derek explained.

"Fred?"

"Laundry guy," he said. "Apparently, all the light blue are on back order until the new group of interns comes next month. So you get to be an attending for the day."

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. "I can do that." She shimmied out of her lounge pants and hopped into her dark blue scrub pants, then pulled on the top, smoothing it over her belly. "How do I look?" she asked.

"Weird," Derek chuckled. "I like you in the dark blue scrubs. Very professional."

"Yeah?"

"I'm kinda turned on," Derek admitted, leaning against the table while she hung her tote bag up in her cubby.

"Maybe I'll take them home with me tonight," Meredith hinted.

Derek raised his eyebrows. "You wanna play doctor?" he asked. "That could be fun."

"After she's born, I'm celibate for six weeks. So until my water decides to break... sexathon," she said.

"Sounds good—but only if you're up for it," Derek said.

"If I'm not, you can be on top. Or we can do that spoony thing," Meredith said, taking his hand so she could swing her leg over the bench. "Ha. See? If I can still do that, I should have no problem riding you."

"I've missed working with you," Derek grinned.

"I know."

…

"Sounds like Lyme disease to me," Alex said, taking a bite of his cheeseburger.

"How did you get into this program?" Cristina asked. "It's just a rash."

"It's definitely more than a rash. The patient has—oh my God, Meredith! What are you doing here?" Izzie asked as Meredith walked to the cafeteria table holding a tray full of food.

Meredith dropped down into the unoccupied chair between Alex and George. "Hey."

"Why are you here?" Lexie asked. "Are you in labor?"

"No," Meredith replied for the umpteenth time that day. "Just rebelling against maternity leave."

"More importantly, why are you in attending scrubs?" Cristina asked.

"Because there's no light blue ones that'll fit me. Do I look important and powerful?" she laughed, cracking the seal on her water bottle and taking a sip from it.

"You look… really pregnant," George replied. "Are you allowed to be here?"

Meredith shrugged. "They're not gonna kick me out."

"_I'll_ kick you out," Izzie countered. "You should be at home resting."

"No, I can't rest anymore. That's why I'm here. All I do is sleep. And eat. And clean. Yesterday, I spent two hours arranging Derek's closet out of boredom. Then I made him dinner," Meredith said. "I've turned into June Cleaver."

"Holy crap," Alex muttered.

Meredith stole a fry off his tray and smiled. "Exactly."

"Since when do you cook?" Lexie asked.

"Since all I do is watch the Food Network," Meredith replied. "I made a cake, too."

Izzie's eyes widened in awe. "You did? Oh, Mer, I'm proud."

"I'm scared," Cristina said.

"Shepherd's okay with you being here?" George asked.

Meredith sighed and a slight blush crept over her cheeks. "He kind of… had no choice," she said, tap-dancing around elaborating further.

"Why? Sex bribe?" Izzie assumed, peeling off her yogurt lid.

"I wet the bed this morning," Meredith confessed. "I played on his sympathy for me."

"Dude," Alex laughed. "That's awesome."

"Wait, you peed? Like 'forgot the training pants' peed?" Lexie asked.

Meredith forked a hunk of her tuna salad and took a bite. "My bladder is serving a dual purpose as Lilly's pillow," she reminded them as she chewed. "She must've moved around while I was asleep, because the next thing I know, Derek is waking me up, asking if my water broke."

"Only in your bedroom would something like that happen," Izzie said.

Alex gave Meredith a friendly pat on the back. "Impressive."

"Peeing in bed is impressive?" Meredith giggled. "Last I checked, it was mortifying."

"Better than crapping in bed," Cristina pointed out.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yeah. That's the silver lining. Anyway, I figured coming here would give me a chance to walk around, maybe kick-start labor. I love being pregnant, but I just want to see her already."

"Sex is supposed to induce labor. Semen contains prostaglandins that help the cervix to ripen. And orgasms produce oxytocin which causes contractions," Lexie informed them, looking down sheepishly when the rest of the table stared at her blankly.

"Lexipedia has a point," Alex said. "Creepy, but still."

"We've been having sex a lot these past few days pretty much _for_ that reason," Meredith divulged. "My water just refuses to break."

"If she doesn't come soon, your OB can induce you, right?" Izzie asked.

Meredith nodded. "If I don't go into labor within the next few days, I'm being induced. But Lilly is still only in the six to seven pound range, so Dr. Halloran isn't concerned about her getting too big. She can hang out a little longer. But yeah, her nine month extended lease is up next week," she laughed.

"I would've given myself a C-section by now," Cristina said, popping a chip into her mouth.

When Meredith rubbed her hand over her chest and swallowed thickly, George frowned. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just heartburn. I've been getting it really bad these past few weeks. They say that's a sign that your baby will have a lot of hair, which, considering Lilly is half Derek makes a lot of sense," Meredith laughed.

"His stupid, perfect DNA is backfiring on you, huh?" Izzie joked.

"Kind of, yeah," Meredith sighed, smiling. "I do all the work; he gets all the glory."

"Where is he? In surgery?" Lexie assumed.

"Yeah. An emergency patient came in during consults. Derek offered to let me scrub in, but I was hungry," Meredith said, glancing back to the lunch line. "Speaking of that… which one of you wants to get me some pudding?"

Alex laughed. "Why can't you get it yourself?"

"Because I'm like a beached whale. Do you know how much effort it takes just to get up out of this damn chair?" Meredith replied, reaching for a five dollar bill in her pocket. "Whoever gets me the pudding can get one for themselves. My treat…" she bribed.

Cristina reached for the money Meredith waved in the air before anyone else could. "I'll be your lunch whore. Chocolate or vanilla?"

"Chocolate, please," Meredith requested. "And thanks for being my… whore."

Cristina patted Meredith's shoulder before heading towards the lunch line. "No problem."

…

After lunch, Meredith decided that she would watch the rest of Derek's surgery from the OR gallery. It was a routine procedure, so she knew it would be empty, and on the plus side, she could sit. Her swollen feet combined with back pain and heartburn were not exactly a welcomed trifecta for working today.

She propped her feet up on the ledge under the gallery window and leaned back. "Daddy is suctioning the clot now," Meredith told her belly. "I know you can't see it, but he's very impressive."

"Meredith?"

Meredith turned her head and saw the Chief standing next to her. She straightened up in her chair and smiled. "Chief."

"Uh…" he stalled. "Aren't you supposed to be on maternity leave?"

"I, um… yes," Meredith admitted.

Richard chuckled, taking the seat next to her. "Getting restless?"

Meredith laughed. "Yes, very. I swore she was going to come_ before _my due date, but I guess she has other plans. You're not gonna rat me out, right?"

"No, no," he promised, waving it off. "Secret's safe."

"Thank you," Meredith replied. She paused, biting contemplatively on her lip. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Well, sure."

"Did my mother ever talk to you about… me?" she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"It's just… ever since I found out I was pregnant, every decision I make—that Derek and I make—we make it with Lilly in mind. And lately, I've just been wondering, you know, if my mom did that, too," Meredith said. "Did she ever do that?"

Richard smoothed out the stubble on his face with his hand, mulling over what she'd said. After a few seconds, he turned to her. "She did. As much as she could, she did," he said. "It was a different time then. A female surgeon with a baby… she had to fight harder to prove herself. And because of that…"

"Yeah," Meredith said in understanding. Because of that, she got the short end of the stick, and they both knew it.

"But things are different now. And you are _not_ your mother. I see that every day," Richard said. "You're the spitting image of her, and you have her talent, but you learned from her mistakes, and you want better for your daughter than what you had. That should tell you everything you need to know."

Meredith looked down at her belly, blinking back the tears that stung her eyes. "Thank you."

"Just telling you the truth," he said.

"I, um… I want you to be in Lilly's life," Meredith said softly. "You knew my mother at her best—and probably her happiest. And I want Lilly to know about her, the happy side of her, too…who she was, what she was like; not just my version of the story. She and I didn't have the easiest relationship, but I want Lilly to know she was someone important, because she was."

Richard cleared his throat and smiled. "I'd be honored, Meredith."

"Thank you," she said.

Derek glanced up to the gallery after one of the scrub nurses removed his headgear, signaling the end of his surgery. Meredith smiled down at him in recognition. "Well, I uh, I guess I should go. Derek's done now, and I'm pretty sure he thinks my water is going to break at a moment's notice."

"I'll walk down with you," Richard offered.

"That's okay. I'm fine," Meredith said, using his shoulder for leverage as she stood up from the chair.

He reached for her arm while she found her balance, and smiled. "No, no. I insist. I want to make sure you really leave this place. You may not be Ellis Grey, but you're still her daughter…"

"I'm leaving, I promise," she said as they walked down the stairs and into the hallway. "You won't see me again until I'm in labor."

"Walking around this place all day ought to help with that."

Meredith sighed, amused. "That's the plan."

…

Derek unlocked the front door and stepped aside, letting Meredith enter first. As soon as she entered the foyer, her shoes were immediately tossed aside, and her bag was set on the table.

"I still can't believe you wore those scrubs home," Derek commented, dropping his own bag next to hers.

"Too tired to change," Meredith said as she tried and failed to stifle a yawn. "Besides, these are comfy."

"Tired?" Derek asked.

"Yes, very," she admitted. "We still need to have sex though."

"Why do we need to have sex?" he laughed, following her into the living room.

Meredith dropped down onto the couch next to Charlie. "Prostaglandins, remember?"

"We've tried that," Derek reminded her, leaning over the couch to kiss the top of her head. "Clearly, my sperm is only good at putting a baby in you, not getting her out."

"Still," she upheld. "It's worth a try."

Derek sat down next to her, draping her legs over his lap. "You can barely keep your eyes open," he chuckled.

"I don't use my eyes for sex," Meredith said, yawning again. "You got me pregnant with your stupid boy penis. You have to help me get her out. Only fair."

"Mer…"

"Derek, I wet the bed this morning. Do you really want to deny me?"

"Fine, we can have sex," Derek relented, knowing he wasn't going to win that battle. "But dinner first."

"Deal," she agreed. "Can we have tacos?"

"Sure." Derek kissed her cheek and got up off the couch. He turned on the TV, handing her the remote. "At least humor me by sitting here and doing nothing," he teased her.

"Hmm, fine."

"Thank you."

After the meat was cooking on the stovetop, he took the various jars of salsa from the fridge, debating on which one to choose. Salsa con queso, regular salsa, pineapple salsa, and barbecue salsa, all of which she could eat straight from the jar these days. Rather than risk picking the wrong one and suffering Meredith's craving-fueled chastising, he walked into the living room to ask her preference.

"Which salsa do you want, Mer?" he asked. When he got no response, he peeked around the side of the couch, smiling when he saw her sound asleep in her dark blue scrubs, remote in hand, with Charlie's face resting on her lap.

Derek gently tugged the remote out of her grasp and set it on the table, careful not to make any noise. He leaned down and kissed her belly. "Try to keep the kicking to a minimum tonight, Lilly," he whispered. "Let's let Mommy sleep. This might be the last nap she takes before you get here—which, I don't know if we've mentioned this, you're welcomed to do at any time…"


	100. Any Day Now

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but it belongs to Shonda. By the way, how awesome was yesterday's episode? Meredith Grey is amazing. And there need to be subtly porny MerDer scenes like that every week. Just saying. Anyway, enjoy the chapter! :)  
**

"Inhale slowly, allowing your spine to lengthen. Now exhale. Touch your fingers to your toes. Feel the stretch as it rolls through your body. Now slowly raise your arms over your head, reaching your fingertips high for sky…" came the soothing womanly voice from the TV.

Derek shivered as he entered the foyer. The first thing he noticed was the temperature. It was an unusually warm June day in Seattle, around seventy-eight degrees, the perfect weather for opening the windows and letting in the breezy air. But not for Meredith, who had the air conditioner blasting on a chilly sixty-seven.

"Mer?" he called out, walking into the living room.

Meredith stood there in a pair of his boxers and a tight camisole that barely covered her belly, doing some fancy pose. "Hey," she said, keeping her eyes focused on the girl on the TV screen.

"What're you doing?" Derek asked, dropping down onto the couch.

"Yoga," Meredith replied. The video instructed her to inhale through her nose while going into dog pose, and she did so surprisingly gracefully with her belly in the way.

Derek watched as she bent down and raised her butt up into the air. "Wow. Still flexible," he said, impressed.

"Yeah. No. Not for this pose," Meredith said, dropping onto her knees before sitting on the floor. "Too much belly burn." She paused the DVD and smiled at him. "How was work?"

"I'm pretty sure everyone thought somebody was chasing me, but other than that, not too bad," he chuckled, rubbing his hands together for warmth. "It's freezing in here."

"Really? I'm working up a sweat," Meredith said. "Why did people think you were being chased?"

Derek handed her the bottle of water sitting on the table. "Because I was afraid that while I was at the hospital, you'd be here, going into labor."

"You were only gone for two hours," she said, taking a sip of water.

"Still. I'd rather not leave you here, knowing your water is going to break at any given minute," Derek said.

"I'm six days late, Derek. Clearly she plans on camping out until Christmas," Meredith giggled.

"It's Friday. If you don't go into labor by Sunday, they're inducing you. Not too much longer," he reminded her. "So… yoga?"

Meredith shrugged. "Izzie suggested it. It's been known to induce labor. Did you know there's actually a yoga channel? Literally, it's called "The Yoga Network." Anyway, I've been doing this since you left."

"You could always fake labor. I mean, you're already overdue. They're not gonna turn you away at the door," Derek suggested, making her smile. "Might be fun. We could make up this whole skit… you in a wheelchair, me pushing you frantically down the hall…"

She laughed, taking his hand and pulling him down onto the floor next to her. "We'll call that Plan B."

"Hmm, what's Plan A?"

"Sex," Meredith said. She pressed her lips against his and gently pushed him onto the padded yoga mat. "Fiftieth time's a charm."

Derek watched as she started unbuttoning his shirt, laughing. "So you're basically using me for my penis?"

"No," she countered. "I happen to love you."

Derek smirked beneath her.

"And your penis," Meredith admitted.

"That's all I'm saying."

…

Later on, and still no signs of labor in sight, Meredith sat out on the patio in the backyard with a pineapple flavored popsicle, watching as Charlie ran around on the lawn amusing himself.

"I see you've emerged from the igloo?" Derek joked, sliding open the glass door leading from their kitchen, freshly showered and wearing his Bowdoin hoodie keep himself warm, given the blizzard going on inside the house.

"I thought some fresh air could do me some good," Meredith said. "This is my life, Derek. Eating popsicles in the sunshine."

"Can I have some?" Derek asked.

Meredith handed it to him and he took a lick of it, his face contorting when the sour taste hit his tongue. "What kind is this?"

"Pineapple," she replied. "Pineapple is supposed to help induce labor, too. Some enzyme in it is supposed to soften the cervix."

"You do realize this is just a popsicle, right?" Derek laughed, handing it back to her. "All sugar, no enzymes."

"That's because we don't have an actual pineapple. I figured I could at least pretend it would do something," Meredith explained as she bit the top of the popsicle off and chewed on it. "Plus, it's tasty."

"So, mind over cervix?"

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him playfully. "Okay, if your freaking sperm would just do its job and soften it, I wouldn't need to eat popsicles…" she said.

"My sperm did its job nine months ago," Derek defended. "It's your stubborn amniotic sac that refuses to break."

"Let me win this one, please?" she requested.

Derek laughed. "Fine, you win," he said. "Would a gift cheer you up?"

"Maybe," Meredith shrugged.

He pulled a newborn-sized black tee shirt from the pocket of his sweatshirt and handed it to her. "It was delivered to my office today. I ordered it a couple weeks ago."

"You got Lilly a tee shirt with The Clash logo on it?" she giggled. "This matches the scrub cap I got you for your birthday."

"I know. I did that on purpose. Now we can match," Derek grinned. "Like it?"

Meredith leaned over her chair and kissed him. "It's adorable; I love it," she said softly. "Where'd you find this?"

"An extensive Google search," he replied. "It was shipped from some trendy baby store in California. Worth every penny."

"You just want to show her off," Meredith pointed out.

"Of course I do," Derek admitted, holding up the tiny shirt to admire it. "I'll wear the scrub cap and she'll wear the shirt, and everyone will know she's my kid."

"Everyone will know she's your kid. She's gonna look just like you," Meredith said, smiling.

"Maybe when she's a baby. But when she gets older, I have a feeling she'll be a mini version of you."

"I wish we could just see her already," Meredith sighed, looking down at her belly. "You're supposed to be six days old, Lilly. If you were here, you could've worn your new tee shirt today, even though The Clash is horrible."

"If I knew you hated them that much, I wouldn't have bought you those "Rock the Casbah" panties…" Derek said.

"You did not."

Derek grinned. "Gold lettering, right on the ass. I couldn't help myself. Those were on back order, but should be here by Monday."

"At least I don't have to wear those in public," Meredith said, finishing off the last bite of her popsicle. "For your eyes only."

"I'd appreciate that," Derek smirked.

Meredith neatly folded the small shirt on her belly. "Despite your crappy taste in music, she'll look really cute in this."

"I think so, yes?"

She leaned back in her chair and breathed in the fresh, breezy air. It was sunny and quiet and made her believe that if one could actually live in harmony with nature or whatever, here was the place to do it. She glanced over at Derek. "You really bought all of this land sight unseen?"

"Well, technically, I saw pictures online. I didn't see it in person until I bought it though," he replied. "I needed a fresh start… figured buying acres of land would help."

"Did it?"

"Not as much as you did." He smiled at her. "Which is why I was so nervous about bringing you out here for the first time."

"I already loved you by then. You could've shown me a cardboard box and it wouldn't have changed that," she told him.

"I loved you then, too."

Meredith smiled back at him. "When did you know you loved me?"

"Well, that's a loaded question," he chuckled.

"Just asking," Meredith said.

"The night I met you."

She looked at him incredulously. "Cheesy."

"True," he countered. "That was the start, anyway. I knew I wanted to know you, even before the sex happened. You were just so…"

"What?"

"I don't know. You made me happy. And I hadn't been happy in… a very long time," he said.

Meredith reached out her hand and he took it. "I know you weren't," she replied. "I'm sorry you went through that, Derek."

"Don't be," Derek said, shaking his head. "You know, it's the best thing that could've happened. If Mark and Addison hadn't… if that didn't happen, who knows where I'd be today."

"Me either," she smiled, rubbing her hand over her belly where Lilly was busy wiggling her foot.

"The universe was looking out for us in its own twisted way, I guess," he said.

"I'd say so," Meredith giggled.

"That, and all the alcohol we consumed that night in the bar. If you hadn't gotten me drunk and taken advantage of me, my initiation to Seattle wouldn't have been nearly as memorable."

She rolled her eyes playfully. "Well, I'm glad I could help with that."

"So what about you?"

"What?"

"When did you know you loved me?" he asked.

Meredith chewed on her lip as she thought it over, then glanced over at him. "I don't know," she answered honestly. "I can't remember _not_ loving you, which is even cornier than what you said. But I remember the morning I _realized_ I already loved you."

"When was that?" Derek asked, intrigued.

"The first time you slept over and we didn't have sex," she said. "We just slept, like this totally normal couple that shares a bed. I'd never done that with a guy before. When I woke up in the morning, you were still right there sleeping next to me, and I just watched you sleep. I wanted you there. That's how I wanted to wake up every morning. That's when I knew I loved you."

Derek just smiled at her. "Hmm…"

A blush crept over her cheeks. "What?"

"Nothing," he shrugged. "It's just… you."

"Me?" Meredith asked as he threaded his fingers in her hair.

He leaned in and kissed her. "Mmhmm." After he pulled back, Derek leaned his forehead against hers. "I love you."

"I love you," she echoed.

"You too, Lilly. And I promise, life outside the uterus isn't that bad, although I understand how nice it must be," Derek laughed.

"She has to be getting claustrophobic, right? And uncomfortable," Meredith said, looking down at her very swollen belly beneath her shirt, then to Derek. "You're a good wooer. Talk to her. Convince her to be born."

"We're both stubborn, which mean she inherited double the stubbornness in her DNA. Good luck getting a kid like that to do anything without a fight," he said, amused.

Meredith smirked at him. "So we're basically screwed?"

"That, or someone made a clerical error when calculating your due date," he joked.

"Haha," she said wryly.

"Labor or not, this time next week, we'll have a baby in the house," Derek said optimistically.

She smiled. "Yeah."

"Are you scared?"

"About giving birth?" she asked. Derek nodded. "I'm not looking forward to the pain, but other than that, no, not really. I don't think I'll be scared until we bring her home. Then it's just you and me. And my experience with newborns is nonexistent," she laughed.

"That's what being a parent is all about. We won't be experts on day one, but we'll learn. And soon enough, it'll feel like she was here forever."

"I'm glad I get to do it all with you," Meredith said. "You know, even if I'm the one pushing the baby out and you aren't."

Derek laughed. "If I could do that for you, you know I would. But I don't have the right… equipment."

"Exactly. And when I'm in the stirrups detonating a baby, you'll be thankful for your penis," she told him.

"I get to watch, right? The birth, I mean. I can… look?" he asked.

Meredith sipped from her bottle of water. "Of course. Why wouldn't you?"

"I dunno. Just figured I'd ask before you're in detonating mode," Derek said, amused by her word choice.

"Yes, I definitely want you to watch her being born," Meredith nodded. "I want to watch, too."

"Really?"

Meredith smiled. "Hell yeah."

"I swear, you're the most relaxed person I've ever known when it comes to giving birth," Derek said.

"I don't really see the point in being scared of it," Meredith shrugged. "I mean, I hear so many horror stories about the pain and everything, but I've never heard anyone say it's not worth it. If a few hours of pain is the tradeoff for having our daughter, then I'll do it."

"Wow." He smiled at her. "That's… more women should have that approach," he said genuinely.

"I have an advantage: unstable childhood. Plus, I've held a bomb. And drowned. That makes childbirth seem like a walk in the park."

"Hmm," Derek considered. "Good point."

…

"So what's on the fun-filled agenda for tomorrow?" Meredith asked, making sure he caught the smirk on her face as she rubbed lotion on her legs.

Derek dropped down on the bed and lay beside her, closing his eyes. "Sleeping in."

"Breakfast in bed?"

"Sure," he said, smiling. "Banana pancakes, right?"

"I crave them practically every morning, which is weird because I barely ever ate pancakes before I was pregnant," Meredith said, setting her lotion on her nightstand and lying down in bed, trying to find a comfortable position on her side.

Derek slid a pillow under her belly to prop it up, then rested his hand on top. "If I wasn't here to make them, you'd be out of luck."

"I just let you think I'm incompetent in the kitchen so you'll cook for me," she joked.

"Oh, really?"

Meredith draped her leg over his for back support and hugged him to her. "Yeah," she yawned.

"Using me as a human pillow?" he chuckled.

She yawned again. "Yeah."

"Okay."

When Derek started trailing his fingers up and down her back, Meredith smiled. "Keep doing that."

"Feel good?"

"Very," she laughed sleepily.

He kissed her forehead. "Sleep."

"Okay," she whispered, her eyes slipping shut slowly. "Love you."

"I love you, too," he said.

An hour or so later, Meredith woke from a deep sleep, limbs still tangled up with Derek's. There was a slight pain radiating from her back all the way around to her belly, and she opened her eyes. It was a feeling she'd only read about, but never experienced until now.

She smiled. "Holy crap."


	101. Baby Time?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I'm just a fan.  
**

**So sorry for the wait! School was even more of a pain than usual this week. Anyway, these next few chapters will be long and detailed. Obviously, big stuff is happening, and I wrote my little heart out. But we're all MerDer fans here, so I don't think anyone will mind; at least, I hope not. Enjoy! :)**

Meredith laid in the dark of their bedroom, breathing slowly. The dull pain that wrapped around her torso from back to front dwindled after a few seconds and she glanced over at the clock on the nightstand. 12:09. Then she waited.

Belly burn was a possibility. Or even stiff joints. Maybe indigestion. She'd half convinced herself it was nothing and closed her eyes again when the pain came back. Meredith looked at the clock again. 12:19. Ten minutes.

When the feeling came again at 12:29, she exhaled slowly, waiting for the pain to pass. It wasn't sharp yet, but definitely significant enough for her to notice. She rubbed Derek's arm. "Derek," Meredith whispered. "Der, wake up."

"Hmm?" he murmured into his pillow.

"Derek," she said, a little louder this time.

Derek finally opened his eyes and looked at her. "Yeah?" he asked.

"I think," she breathed. "I think I'm in labor."

"What?" He disentangled himself from her and sat up, snapped out of his sleep without a second thought. "Are you having contractions?"

"Yeah, I think so," Meredith said. "I've had three so far. Every ten minutes."

"Are you alright?" Derek asked, reaching for her hand.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just… these aren't Braxton Hicks." She smiled at him, trying to keep him calm. "I'm okay, Derek," she said softly.

Derek leaned in and kissed her. "Okay," he said. "Your water didn't break?"

"No. Just the contractions. They're not that bad yet," Meredith said, smoothing her hand in circles over her belly.

"Are you having one right now?" he asked.

Meredith looked at the clock. "No. I probably won't have another one for a few minutes."

"What do they feel like? Sharp or dull?"

"I don't know," she laughed softly. "Not excruciating, but not really pleasant. Like bad period cramps, but different."

He grabbed his phone off the nightstand. "I'll call the hospital."

"Wait." Meredith took his hand when she felt another contraction happening. She focused on him as she breathed in and out.

Derek squeezed her hand and rubbed his thumb across her knuckles. "Okay. Breathe." He did it with her, inhaling and exhaling, until her pain tapered off.

Meredith let go of his hand and rested her palm on his cheek. "Thank you," she whispered.

"Team sport, remember? Anything you need, I'm here." Derek kissed her forehead. "God, I love you so much."

"I love you, too," she said. She saw the tears in his eyes and smiled. "Don't cry. If you cry, I'm gonna start crying…"

"Can't help it," he grinned. "We're gonna have a baby today."

"June fifth. Lilly finally picked a birthday she liked," Meredith said.

"June fifth," Derek echoed.

"Let's just hope I push her out within the next twenty-three hours," Meredith giggled.

"You will. Today's the day, Mer." He reached for his phone again. "I'll call the hospital, let them know we're coming in."

"Okay," she agreed.

While Derek was making the call, Meredith went over the checklist in her head. Her bag, Derek's bag, Lilly's bag, waiting by the front door. The car seat had been ready to go for weeks. She shuffled out of bed and walked over to her dresser for clothes.

Charlie watched from his bed as the two busied themselves with getting ready, and Meredith smiled at him. "I think it's baby time, buddy," she said, changing into a tee shirt and shorts. "Mark or Bridget will be by later to pick you up. They're gonna watch you for the next day or two while we're at the hospital."

The dog simply yawned at her in response, and Meredith laughed. "Okay then, I'm glad you're on board with that plan."

Derek hung up with the hospital and tossed his phone onto the bed. "The nurse on the phone said to come in. She's paging Dr. Halloran."

"Holy crap," Meredith breathed.

"What?" he asked nervously.

"Nothing," she said. "This was just… unexpected. And we're calm. The scene in my head was a little different. Me screaming like a ranting maniac, you losing your keys and having to deliver the baby yourself because we'd be stranded out here…"

"Wow. Quite the imagination," Derek chuckled. "Calm is good. Let's aim for calm," he said, pulling on a pair of jeans.

Another contraction came over her and she breathed through it. "What time is it?" she asked.

"Having another one?" he asked, running his hand comfortingly up and down her back.

"Yeah. What time is it?"

"It's, uh… 12:48," Derek said. "Nine minutes apart."

"Nine. Okay," she nodded, waddling toward the bathroom. "I need to pee, then we can go."

"Okay."

While Meredith was in the bathroom, Derek quickly made the bed as a way to stop pacing around. Keep calm. That was the motto of their birth plan. And he was determined to follow through on it. Labor, contractions, pushing, all of it. He smiled at the latest picture of Lilly's sonogram on his nightstand. A tiny fist tucked under her chin and what looked like a small smile on her face. His breath caught in his throat. Today was the day that he and Meredith would finally get to hold the little person they made nine months ago. To call that feeling thrilling didn't seem like enough.

"Hey," Meredith said as she emerged, a hand over her belly. "You should call your mom and your sisters once we get to the hospital."

Derek put his hand on the small of her back as they walked out of the room and into the hall, Charlie trotting close behind. "I will," he said.

When they passed by the nursery, Meredith smiled. "We'll finally get to use that room now."

"And all of the headbands and bikinis and dresses," he laughed.

"Crap. I forgot her hair bow." Meredith turned around and walked into the nursery, flicking on the light switch.

Derek blinked in shock. "Meredith, you're in labor."

"I'm aware of that," she said. "But I have a purple hair bow to match with the outfit we're bringing her home in. I meant to pack it in the diaper bag but I forgot." She rummaged through Lilly's dresser drawer and found it, holding it up to show him. "Got it."

"Good. Ready?" he asked, practically ushering her out of the nursery and through the hall toward the stairs.

"We have time," Meredith assured him.

"Your water could break any second. And your cervix could already be dilating," he said.

Meredith dropped the hair bow into her bag when they reached the bottom of the stairs and knelt down to kiss Charlie goodbye. "Until there's a baby between my legs, we're fine."

"Still, I'd rather not have to deliver my daughter in the backseat of the car," Derek smirked, slinging all three bags over his shoulder.

"Okay, let's go," she said. "We love you, Charlie. Next time you see us, we'll have Lilly."

"Mark will be by for you later, buddy," Derek smiled at the dog. "Be sure to drive him crazy," he joked.

"Have you called him yet?" Meredith asked as they exited the house.

Derek locked the front door and they walked toward the car in the driveway. "I will. Actually, I think he's on call tonight, anyway."

"Okay," Meredith said. Just as Derek was opening the car door for her, another contraction hit her and she leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. "Right on schedule…"

"Only a few more seconds," Derek whispered into her hair. "Almost over."

She exhaled slowly as it passed. "Wow, those suck."

"You okay?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah," she said, slipping into the passenger seat.

"Okay." Derek quickly walked around to the other side of the car and into the driver's seat, starting it up and backing out of the driveway in record time.

"Lilly picked a nice, warm day to be born on," she commented, turning the air on full blast. "Seriously, how often does Seattle hit eighty in June… at one in the morning? I'm sweating my ass off."

"That could be from the contractions," Derek suggested.

Meredith felt his forehead. "You're not sweating?"

"No," he chuckled. "Nervous, but not sweating."

"Don't be nervous," she said confidently, one hand draped over her belly.

"I really need to videotape this night," Derek grinned, finally pulling off the land.

"Lilly's entrance will not be videotaped for posterity," Meredith laughed. "The camera stays above the stirrups."

Derek reached for her hand. "Not that. I mean for how… relaxed you are. You could make Guinness for this."

"I'm awkward and freaky, remember?" she joked. "Plus, I've only dipped my toes into labor. I could easily turn into a bad movie cliché without warning."

"You're allowed to be cliché today," Derek said. "I think pushing a baby out of your body warrants that."

"Okay, good."

Fifteen minutes and one contraction later, and they reached Seattle Grace. Derek pulled into the employee parking lot and managed to get a VIP spot near the entrance. He gathered the various bags, took her hand, and they walked through the main doors of the lobby.

"It's weird coming here to be the patient, not the doctor," Meredith said.

Derek pushed the button for the elevator. "It'll be even weirder to leave with a baby in our arms," he chuckled.

The doors to the elevator opened and Mark stood inside, a chart under his arm and a coffee in his hand. "What the…?" His eyes widened in realization. "Grey, you're in labor?"

"Yeah, I am," Meredith replied as she and Derek stepped inside the elevator.

A grin spread across Mark's face. "Damn, I thought this day would never come. Congrats!" he all but cheered, clapping Derek on the back.

"Thanks," Derek nodded, smiling.

"Your water break yet?" Mark asked.

"No, just contractions so far. Nine minutes apart," Meredith said. "Today's the day."

"Could you stop by to pick up the dog later? His stuff is sitting by the front door," Derek reminded him.

"Yeah," Mark said, following them off the elevator.

Meredith laughed. "What're you doing?"

"I'm her godfather. I have entitlement here." When they looked at him blankly, he smirked. "Relax, I'm kidding. I'm going into surgery in ten minutes. Just running out the clock. Besides, you're like my little sister. That would just be weird."

"I agree," Derek said.

They reached the nurses' station in the Labor and Delivery wing, and approached the desk, where a nurse whose name was Stephanie waited for them. "Dr. Grey, I hear you're finally in labor," she said cheerfully. "Dr. Halloran is on her way in now."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled.

"If you could just fill out some paperwork first, then I'll take you to your room," Stephanie said, setting a clipboard and a pen on the counter.

"I got it," Derek offered.

While he filled out form after form, Meredith felt another contraction creeping up on her. Rather than grab for Derek's hand and delay the process of freaking getting to sit down in her hospital bed already, she reached for Mark's and squeezed.

"Mer, are you okay?" Derek asked.

Meredith waved dismissively at him as she gritted her teeth. "Just fill out the damn forms," she winced.

"Alright, breathe through it," Mark coached, stepping in as Derek frantically scrawled information and signatures on the endless stack of papers. "Want me to sing your birth song? Do you two have one of those?"

Meredith managed to laugh despite the pain running through her body. "No, we don't," she replied.

"Okay then, uh…" Mark stalled as he grappled for a song. "Those flashing lights come from everywhere. The way they hit her I had to stop and stare. She's got me love stoned. Man I swear she's bad and she knows. I think that she knows..." he said, completely out of key.

"Okay, what qualifies Love Stoned as a birth song?" Meredith asked him, cutting him off from singing any more.

Mark shrugged. "I don't know. It was the first thing I thought of."

"That's a terrible song, Mark," Derek commented, still signing the paperwork as quickly as he could.

"And now it's gonna be in my head all day," Meredith said. The pain dwindled down and she let his hand fall limp at his side. "It's over. Thank you, Mark," she breathed.

"So those things are a pain in the ass, huh?" Mark joked.

"More like a pain in the back, abdomen, and crotch," Meredith corrected. "Sorry if I hurt your hand."

Mark shook his head. "It's fine," he said. "See, now aren't you glad I was here?"

"Yes, you're a hero… with an impeccable taste in music," Meredith deadpanned. "No, seriously though. I appreciate it."

Derek handed Stephanie the phone book-sized stack of paperwork back. "Here you go; all finished."

"Okay, great," Stephanie smiled. "Dr. Grey, would you like a wheelchair?"

"No, I'll walk," Meredith replied, lacing her fingers through Derek's.

Mark's pager went off and he pulled it from the clip on his pants. "Alright, I have to go. I'll be back later. If you need anything, let me know, okay?"

"Thanks, Mark," Derek said sincerely.

Mark headed toward the elevator with more pep in his step than they'd ever seen, and Meredith couldn't help but smile. "He's excited, huh?"

Derek adjusted the three bags still slung over his shoulder. "Very," he agreed. "I should be videotaping that, too."

Stephanie finished filing the paperwork into Meredith's patient chart, and got up out of her chair. "Alright, all set," she said. "You'll be in room 3605."

Derek kissed Meredith's temple as they followed Stephanie down the hall toward the room. "Hmm, that's Lilly's birthday. Six-O-Five," he said.

"If she weighs six pounds, five ounces, we need to play the lottery," Meredith told him. "Clearly, that's our lucky number."

"I'd say so," Derek chuckled.

They reached Meredith's room and Stephanie opened the door, ushering them inside ahead of her. "Okay, your hospital gown is on the bed. Closet is in the corner. Make yourselves comfortable. I'll be back in a few minutes to get you all set up, okay?"

"Alright; thank you," Meredith said softly.

Stephanie closed the door on her way out and they both stood there, looking around like they'd been dropped there by a spaceship. "Does this feel real to you?" Meredith asked.

"No," Derek confessed, setting the bags down on the couch. "No scrubs, no pagers, no lives to save. Just… two people here to have a baby."

"That's weird." Meredith took her hospital gown from the bed and walked toward the bathroom. "I'm gonna go get changed."

"Okay," he said.

While Meredith was changing in the bathroom, Derek remembered to shut the blinds to her room. They didn't need any nosy coworkers looking in. Nearly everyone in the hospital knew Meredith was pregnant, and the news that she was finally in labor would probably catch peoples' attention. And he knew Meredith wouldn't really want an audience today.

"Derek," she called out.

"Yeah." Derek walked over and opened the bathroom door, and saw Meredith gripping the edge of the sink as she stood in her bra and panties. "Contraction?"

"Mmhmm," she hummed through her nose. She turned around and rested her head on his shoulder. "Please don't sing Love Stoned."

"I won't," he laughed. "Stuck in your head, too?"

Meredith nodded. "Stupid Mark."

"We packed your iPod," Derek reminded her. "Here, I'll help you." He took the hospital gown she had squished in her hand and shook it out. "Keeping your bra on?"

"Yeah," Meredith breathed, letting her weight fall into him while she relaxed after the contraction ended.

"Okay."

She held her arms out and Derek slipped them through the arm holes, then tied the back by her neck.

"Panties?" he smirked.

"Very funny," she said dryly, reaching under her gown to pull them off. She kicked them down her legs and Derek gathered all of her clothes into a pile.

He tucked them under his arm and quickly snapped up the back of the gown for her. "All done."

"Thank you," she said softly before leading the way out of the bathroom. "And thank you for shutting the blinds."

"Figured you wouldn't want paparazzi," Derek said, tucking her clothes back into her bag.

Meredith laughed. "No, I really don't." She sat on the edge of the bed and swung her legs onto it, leaning back into the pillows. "Oh, thank God," she sighed.

Derek pulled a chair over and sat beside her. "Tired?" he asked, reaching for her hand.

"A little," Meredith said. She smiled at him. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Derek leaned in and kissed her. "I know this sucks for you, but I'm…" He swallowed thickly. "Thank you, Meredith."

"I can do this," she whispered.

Derek smiled. "You can do this."

There was a knock at the door and Dr. Halloran poked her head in. "Can I come in?" she asked.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded.

"Seven days later, and here we are," Dr. Halloran laughed, setting Meredith's chart down on the tray table and washing her hands. "She's finally coming, huh?"

"Based on the pain, I'd hope so," Meredith replied. "My contractions were ten minutes apart but now it's more like eight or nine. My water didn't break yet."

"That's a good sign. Labor seems to be progressing," the doctor said encouragingly. "I'm just going to check your cervix to see if you're dilating yet, then Stephanie is going to get you hooked up to the fetal monitor, okay?" she said, pulling on a pair of gloves.

Meredith leaned her head back and nodded. "Okay, that's fine," she said.

"Alright, just relax your legs for me. That's it," Dr. Halloran said.

Meredith focused on Derek while Dr. Halloran examined her, and she squeezed his hand as she tried not to flinch at the discomfort.

"Okay, you're one centimeter and about ten percent effaced. Baby's head is low, which is a good sign. All of that pressure should speed up your dilation," Dr. Halloran said, pulling off her gloves and readjusting Meredith's gown.

"Okay," Meredith replied.

Dr. Halloran checked her watch. "It's a little after two. We'll give your water a few hours to break on its own. After that, labor usually picks up speed very quickly. If I had to guesstimate, I'd say you'll probably deliver sometime this afternoon; maybe a little later because this is your first baby, and first time births tend to take a little longer."

"Definitely today though?" Derek asked.

"Oh, absolutely. You'll be holding her by the end of the day today."

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand in excitement. "Okay."

"Alright, I'll be back later. If you need anything, just page me," Dr. Halloran said, smiling at both of them. "And congratulations. It's a big day."

"Thank you," Derek grinned.

Stephanie came back in and hooked her up to a fetal monitor to track Lilly's heartbeat as labor progressed. And Derek called home to tell his mom that grandchild number sixteen, granddaughter number ten, was on her way.

He hung up his cell phone and set it on the nightstand next to Meredith's bed. She saw the tears in his eyes and smiled. "You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "My mom. She's just, uh… I don't think she could've been any happier."

"She can come out here if she wants," Meredith said.

"I know," Derek replied. He laughed. "She's actually calling the airline now to see what dates are available to fly out."

"Tell her to come whenever. We have space at the house," she said, moving over in the bed to make room for him.

"Probably in a few weeks. She wants us to have time to get settled in with Lilly first," Derek said. "I'll sleep on the couch, Mer. It's fine."

Meredith patted the empty space on the bed. "No, I want you here."

Derek smiled. "Okay." He kicked off his shoes and shuffled into the bed next to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "She said she'd call my sisters."

"Okay, good," Meredith yawned.

"We should both try to get some sleep," Derek said, catching her yawn and running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah." Meredith draped her arm over his torso and rested her head on his chest. "Lilly's heartbeat is really strong," she commented.

"Hmm, strong and perfect," Derek said. "So, no IV?"

"Dr. Halloran said I didn't need one unless I need Pitocin, which is good. I hate needles." She bit her lip when a contraction came and reached for Derek's hand. "I hate these more," she winced.

"You can yell at me, curse my penis if you want, if it'll make you feel better," he offered.

Meredith smiled weakly, fighting through the pain as she waited for it to end. She exhaled slowly. "I'm saving that," she said. "No castrating threats yet."

"Okay," Derek said amusedly.

She closed her eyes and felt the thud of Derek's heartbeat under her ear, and let the wooshing Lilly's heartbeat on the fetal monitor lull her. "Please come out today, Lilly."

"She will," Derek said, putting his hand on her belly. "No rush, but sooner's better than later, princess."

Meredith closed her heavy eyelids and resettled against Derek's body, hospital bracelets around both of their wrists. "Freaking Love Stoned won't leave my head."

"Want me to get your iPod out of the bag? I also take requests."

"You'd really sing to me?"

"Do you want me to sing to you?"

She laughed. "No, thanks. I'm good."

"If you change your mind, let me know."

"Okay, I will."


	102. It's Called Labor for a Reason

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's. I just love it.**

**I know I sound like a broken record, but thanks so much for all the reviews! It's awesome to know how excited everyone is. And as usual, I'm sorry about the wait. College really sucks sometimes. Enjoy!  
**

Pain. That's really all Meredith felt. Pain so annoyingly intense that being drugged into oblivion sounded pretty damn good. She lifted Derek's hand and checked the time on his watch. 8:14. Six hours of on and off sleep, give or take. Shooting pains made that really hard to do. The faintest slivers of sunshine slipped through the closed blinds of the window. Meredith smiled through her pain. Lilly would be born on a rare, bright, sunny day in Seattle.

"Derek," she said softly, not wanting to startle him.

Derek's eyes popped open, and he sat up. "Everything okay?"

"I…" Meredith breathed out of her mouth. "Hang on a sec." She squeezed Derek's hand and focused on him while she waited for the contraction to end.

"Really bad?"

Meredith nodded, dropping her head to his shoulder. Once the pain passed, she leaned into him. "Can you get the doctor? I want her to check me."

"Yeah." Derek helped her off her side and onto her back so she would be more comfortable, then disappeared into the hallway, returning within seconds with Dr. Halloran by his side.

"Good morning," Dr. Halloran said cheerfully. "Seems like labor has picked up a lot these past few hours…"

"Yeah," Meredith replied. "I really hope I dilated more. Otherwise, I might need you to drug me."

Dr. Halloran smiled, grabbing a pair of gloves off the counter after washing her hands. "Okay, let's check you out, see if you've made any progress." She sat at the edge of Meredith's bed and lifted the blanket off her legs so she could examine her.

Meredith breathed, in and out, in and out, keeping her eyes trained on Derek. This wasn't pleasant, either, especially now that her labor was getting worse. "Please tell me I'm ready to push…" she joked.

"Not quite there yet," the doctor laughed. "You're at three now, and your water is still intact. Normally, epidurals are given between four and five centimeters, and I think you'll be there soon—if you were thinking about an epidural, of course."

"Maybe," Meredith said. "That's safe for the baby, right?"

"If you opt for it, baby will be just fine," Dr. Halloran replied. "In the mean time, you could try walking around a little, which usually helps the cervix dilate."

"Okay." Meredith ran a hand over her belly. "And can I eat? I know there's all these myths about not eating during labor, but I'm hungry, and ice chips aren't gonna cut it until I push her out."

"Appetite is good. You need to keep your energy up," Dr. Halloran encouraged, washing her hands then drying them off with a paper towel. "Nothing heavy, but sure, you can eat."

Meredith smiled. "Okay, good."

"You're doing a great job, Meredith. Baby's heart rate is nice and strong, too. I'll be back to check on you in a little while," Dr. Halloran said.

"Thank you," Meredith said.

Dr. Halloran left the room and Meredith adjusted her bed to a sitting position. "Three centimeters…"

"I know. That's good," Derek said, leaning over the bed to kiss the top of her head. "Are you hungry? I could get you something."

"Yeah, just some dry cereal or something. I'm kinda nauseous from the pain," Meredith said, taking a sip from her cup of water.

Derek frowned, worried. "You are?"

"It's normal," Meredith assured him, swinging her legs over the bed. "It might just be because I haven't eaten anything in a while."

"What're you doing?"

"I need to pee," she said. "My bladder feels like it's going to explode."

There was a brief knock at the door, followed by the bustle of five people trying to enter at once. Derek turned around and saw their friends standing there, looks of shock on each of their faces. "What the hell? Mer's in labor and no one calls us?" Izzie spoke for the group.

"We got here at one this morning. Would you really have wanted a phone call?" Derek asked, leaning against the wall next to the bathroom door in case Meredith needed help.

"Yes," Lexie replied. "How is she?" She glanced around the room in horror. "Wait, Lilly wasn't born yet, right?"

"No," Derek chuckled. "Mer's only three centimeters. Her water didn't even break yet."

"So this is for real, then? She's gonna pop the kid out today?" Cristina asked.

Derek smirked. "You mean give birth to our daughter? Yes, she is."

Meredith left the bathroom, smiling in surprise when she saw her friends in her room. "Hey. What're you all doing here?"

Izzie gestured to the room. "Uh, you're in labor…"

"Yeah, I am. Is one of you on Dr. Halloran's service today?" Meredith asked. "Please tell me no."

Alex shrugged. "I was supposed to be, but you're like my sister, and I don't really wanna see your girl parts, so I switched for the pit instead."

"Thank you, Alex. That was sweet," Meredith smiled, amused. "I don't want you seeing my girl parts either."

"Are you okay, Mer? Do you need anything?" George asked.

"Derek's getting me food," Meredith said, walking back over to the bed. "But if you could sneak me into an OR gallery, that'd be nice."

"No surgery," Derek laughed. He took her hand and helped her get resettled into bed, then kissed her. "I'll be back."

"Thank you."

"Are you drugged or something?" Cristina asked.

"What? No, I'm not drugged," Meredith replied as she fixed her ponytail. "Why?"

"You're really… calm," Lexie pointed out. "Aren't you supposed to be panting like an animal, threatening our lives?"

Meredith rolled her eyes. "No. I'm being… Zen or whatever."

"Zen?" George echoed.

"Yes, Zen. This is a calm environment." Another contraction sprang up on her, and she dropped her head back onto the pillows. "Holy crap."

"What?" Lexie asked.

"Contraction," Meredith breathed. "Ouch ouch ouch…" she groaned.

Izzie stuck her hand out. "Here. Squeeze."

Meredith grabbed hold of Izzie's hand and held on tight until the contraction passed. "These things are getting more and more freaking intense," she sighed. "Thanks for the hand, Iz."

"Are you getting an epidural?" Alex asked.

"I don't know yet," Meredith said. "My plan was to be all hardcore and do it without pain meds., but labor is called labor for a reason. It sucks."

"I say get the epidural," Cristina shrugged. "I wouldn't want to feel a baby shooting out of my vagina either."

"That requires me making it to ten centimeters, and my water breaking. The waiting is the hardest part. A baby shooting out of my hoohoo is the goal. Dr. Halloran said sometime this afternoon. Maybe early tonight," Meredith said, taking a drink from her pink water cup.

Lexie gasped. "Crap! Please tell me you and Derek packed a camera. The camera on my phone sucks."

"Yes, we have a camera," Meredith laughed.

"We need to get primo window space at the nursery. All of the pushy grandparents always hog it," Izzie said. "Oh, that reminds me… I have _Team Lilly_ pins in my cubby."

Meredith blinked. "You have what?"

"Did you say pins? Like, to wear?" Cristina asked.

"Yes. And we're all wearing one," Izzie told them. "Sloan's already wearing his. I even gave him a few to hand out."

"How the hell did you manage that?" Alex asked.

"Where have you been these past nine months?" Izzie joked, refilling Meredith's water cup without Meredith even asking. "I'm surprised he didn't have tee shirts made."

"I'm surprised _you_ didn't," Cristina retorted.

Derek reentered the room holding a box of Cheerios, a granola bar, and a banana, smiling in relief when he saw that Meredith was pain-free for the moment. "Hey. I figured you might want variety, so I got you these," he said, putting the food down on the nightstand.

Meredith saw the pin fastened to his shirt and smiled. "Nice pin."

"Oh. Yeah. I saw Mark downstairs and he gave it to me," Derek grinned, looking down at the pink and yellow pin adorned with glitter. "By the way, thanks Stevens. Very thoughtful."

Izzie smiled. "I've had the idea ever since you guys got pregnant."

"No, _we're _not pregnant. _I'm_ pregnant. Until Derek puts on a hospital gown and pushes a baby out of his nether region, I'm the pregnant one," Meredith smirked.

"Fair enough," Izzie laughed. "But yeah, you're all wearing a pin."

"Why aren't you wearing one?" Lexie asked.

"It's in my pocket. I have to scrub in with Hunt in ten minutes, so I'd have to take it off anyway," Izzie shrugged. "By the way, the Ziploc bag is sitting on top of the stack of books in my cubby. I'm sure Meredith would appreciate it if you all wore one," she said, using Meredith's name to sound more convincing.

"Yes, I would," Meredith echoed.

Alex glanced down at his watch and sighed. "Crap, we should go."

"If Bailey finds us all in here, she'll probably kill us," Lexie said, getting up off the couch. She patted Derek's shoulder. "Congratulations, you guys. And keep us in the loop, please."

"We will," Derek promised. "Thanks for coming by. We appreciate it."

"Oh, we'll be back," Izzie said. "What's your balloon color preference? Pink? Purple? Variety?"

"Derek will do that. You don't have to," Meredith said.

Izzie cocked her head at them and smiled. "Shut up and pick a color," she said.

"Pink would be great," Meredith replied just to appease her. "Thanks, Iz."

She left the room, trailing after the others, and shut the door on her way out. Derek walked over to Meredith and sat on the edge of her bed. "Sorry. They all barged in at once. I had no warning," he joked.

"It's okay. I figured they'd stop by for a visit eventually. And I'd rather it be now than when I'm pushing." Meredith pointed to her bag sitting on the couch. "Can you get my shorts? I want to put them on, then we can walk around."

"Yeah," Derek said.

After he pulled them from her bag, Meredith slipped them on under her hospital gown. "I should probably let my nurse do this, but whatever. Surgeon trumps nurse," she said, unfastening the fetal monitor strapped around her belly.

"You're not a surgeon today. You're a patient," he smirked, taking her hand and helping her out of bed.

"Irrelevant."

He laughed. "Okay."

Meredith grabbed his hands when a contraction snuck up on her unexpectedly, and she dropped back down onto the bed because the pain coursing through her was that intense. She leaned into Derek, trying to find the words to form a sentence but couldn't even do that. It felt like she was being stabbed from the inside out, and all she could do was moan, trying to force the pain out of her.

Derek knelt down in front of her, his stomach twisting in knots when he saw the look of agony etched all over her face. "Almost over," he whispered, letting her squeeze his hands as hard as she wanted to. "That's it; there you go."

The pain finally went away, and she blinked at the tears pooled in her eyes, not realizing they were there until Derek became blurry in her line of vision.

"You're crying," Derek said worriedly, reaching for a tissue from the box on her nightstand and handing one to her. "Is the pain that bad? Want me to call Dr. Halloran back in?"

"No, I'm okay," Meredith breathed. "It just hurts. It's supposed to hurt."

"It doesn't have to hurt," Derek said. "They can probably give you something."

Meredith shook her head. "I need to dilate more before I get the epidural. Let's walk."

"You sure?" Derek asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay now. We don't have to walk far; just up and down the hall or something," she said, reaching for the box of Cheerios on the tray table. "I'll bring these."

"Good; you and Lilly need to eat." Derek kissed her forehead, then took her hand, helping her stand up again.

"Lilly needs to be born," Meredith retorted, finding her footing. She slipped her feet into her flip flops and looped her arm through Derek's. "Okay, let's go."

"Okay."

They trekked out into the hall and turned right, walking toward the nursery. The OB ward was generally quiet earlier in the day, new parents and babies still asleep, except for the occasional laboring mothers, or those in the process of pushing.

A nurse wheeled a newborn boy wrapped in a blue blanket toward a nearby patient room, and gently knocked on the door before entering. Both Meredith and Derek snuck a peek at him as they walked down the corridor and smiled.

"He's so tiny," Meredith whispered, opening her cereal box so she could finally get some food in her stomach. "And blonde. Lilly's not going to be blonde…"

Derek laughed. "Maybe. You were blonde when you were born," he said. "It's not impossible."

"I think she's going to come out with a head full of this," Meredith said, combing her fingers through his hair. "Thick and dark and curly."

"Yeah?"

"Mother's intuition," Meredith defended, sprinkling a handful of Cheerios into her mouth. "Plus, they say heartburn during pregnancy means your baby will have lots of hair. Lilly better have your hair; otherwise, all of the heartburn will have been for nothing."

"Or it could've been from all that Taco Bell…" Derek joked.

"So I craved a lot of spicy food. I also craved multiple rounds of sex most nights, and not once did you protest that," Meredith reminded him.

Derek smirked at her. "Why would I protest?"

"Crap, it's happening again," Meredith winced. She shoved the box of cereal at Derek and gripped onto the wood paneling along the wall of the hallway. Her knuckles went white at how hard she held on.

"Deep breaths," Derek coached, rubbing his hand up and down her back as he shielded her from potential onlookers roaming around. "It'll be over soon."

The pain that she felt tearing through her was replaced with a wet feeling trailing down her legs. She looked down at the floor and saw a small puddle at her feet. "Crap."

"What?"

"My…" Meredith exhaled. "My water just broke."

"Alright, that's okay," Derek said. "Just get through the contraction."

Within a few seconds, the contraction ended, and Meredith leaned against the wall, taking a few deep breaths to build up the energy she needed to walk back to her room. "I hate your penis," she said. "I mean, usually I love it. But right now, I'm starting to resent its existence, just a little bit."

"You're allowed to hate my penis today," Derek said, kissing her forehead.

"Thanks," she said softly.

"Want to head back so you can change?" Derek asked.

"Yeah." Meredith took his hand and side stepped the puddle on the floor. She looked down at it, biting her lip. "Remind me to tip the custodians a lot this Christmas. I wouldn't want to clean that up."

Derek chuckled, letting her lean into him as they took the short walk back to her room. "I'm sure it happens a lot in this part of the hospital."

While Meredith was changing into a fresh hospital gown, Derek went to the nurses' station and smiled at Stephanie, who was doing something on the computer. "Hi," he greeted. "My wife's water just broke in the hallway, near 3625."

"That's the second time that's happened this week. Don't worry about it," Stephanie smiled, reaching for the phone. "We'll take care of it for you. And I'll page Dr. Halloran. She should just be finishing up rounds now."

"Okay, thank you," Derek nodded.

He went back into Meredith's room and found her in the bathroom, slipping on a new gown. "Hey. Can you tie this?"

"Yeah," he replied, making quick bows out of each set of strings that hung from the loose material. "Dr. Halloran should be here any minute."

"Okay." Meredith draped her arms over his shoulders and pressed her forehead against his. "Thank you."

"You're the one doing all the work. I'm just the secretary," Derek said playfully, an attempt to make her feel better. He'd never seen her in this much pain before, but still, she was handling it way better than he ever could.

"Impregnator-slash-secretary," Meredith corrected as they left the bathroom. "You're good at both of those."

"Impregnator?"

"Well, you did knock me up," she laughed. "If you hadn't, we wouldn't be here right now."

"True," he said, helping her get back into bed and refastening the fetal monitor around her belly.

Meredith leaned into the pillows and brushed some stray strands off her face. "Seriously, how can sex be so awesome, but labor be so horrible. Damn catch-22."

"Labor leads to a baby. That's a good catch-22," Derek countered, dropping down into his chair next to her bed. "Cheerios?"

"Your optimism is annoying," she laughed, taking the yellow box from him.

"How are we doing?" Dr. Halloran asked, knocking twice before stepping into the room. "I heard your water broke. Now your labor should really pick up." She washed her hands and pulled on some gloves. "I'll check you again to see if you're any farther along, and make sure the amniotic sac completely ruptured."

"Okay," Meredith said, smiling when Derek reached for her hand and held it.

"Alright, let's see…" Dr. Halloran said as she began her brief exam. "You're at four, almost five now. Your cervix is thinning out, and the baby is coming down."

"Almost five?" Derek asked. "Wow."

"Yep. And your water is fully broken. Labor is going to pick up in intensity now," Dr. Halloran said, checking her watch. "It's almost eleven now. If your labor gains some speed and you keep dilating, I'd say you'll be pushing by three or four o'clock this afternoon."

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand and let out a breath. "Okay," she smiled.

"You're also able to get an epidural now, if you wanted one. Feel free to talk it over. Stephanie can page the anesthesiologist for you, and we'll also start you on some Pitocin to keep your cervix dilating," Dr. Halloran said as she washed her hands. "You're doing a great job. Only a few more hours now."

"Thank you," Meredith said, reopening her cereal box after Dr. Halloran left.

"Are you getting one?" Derek asked.

"I don't—" She dropped the cereal box into her lap and curled her knees toward her when a contraction came along. "Owww," Meredith groaned, rolling onto her side.

Derek glanced at the clock on the wall and frowned. Meredith's contractions were getting closer and more painful. Even though she was close to five centimeters, that was only halfway, and the other half would probably be worse. He rubbed his hand over her shoulder.

Meredith closed her eyes tiredly. "This really freaking hurts."

"If you want the epidural, I say go for it. You shouldn't have to be in pain if you don't need to be," Derek said, picking the cereal box up before it fell off the bed and onto the floor.

"Lilly will be okay, right?" Meredith asked. "I know I'm a doctor but my irrational mommy brain trumps that right now. I've read a lot of horror stories online about getting one…"

"Dr. Halloran trumps Dr. Google," Derek said. "Lilly is just fine. You'll be fine, too, even if you don't get one. I'm just saying I want you to be comfortable and be able to get some rest before you have to push. But it's your decision, Mer. Whatever you want to do."

The thought of more frequent and magnified pain literally made her nauseous, and she swallowed. If the hellish stabbing feeling going on inside her could go away for a while, it would be nice. Meredith pressed the call button for the nurses' station.

"I'm still hardcore," she said. "But if this pain doesn't stop, I might start yelling. And because you're standing right here, the yelling would be directed at you."

Derek leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "I wouldn't mind. And yes, you're still hardcore."

…

"Whatever genius came up with the epidural is really my hero," Meredith said, finally enjoying her box of Cheerios without the intermittent searing pain ripping through her.

"That would be John Bonica," he said, flipping through crappy Saturday afternoon TV shows on the basic cable channels the hospital offered.

"You _would_ know that," she accused, smirking at him.

"I'm a neurosurgeon and a pain specialist. Of course I know that," he laughed.

"He's dead, right?"

"Died in '94," Derek replied.

"Shame," Meredith sighed. "If he was alive, I'd seriously send him a fruit basket or something."

Derek leaned back in his chair and smiled at her. "Epidural really kicked in, huh?"

"Hmm, yes," she said happily. "I can't feel anything from the waist down. It's kind of awesome."

"You're having a contraction right now," Derek said, noticing the spike in the monitor.

"Am I?" Meredith glanced down at her belly and bit her lip. "This is weird."

A knock at the door interrupted them, and they looked over at it. "Come in," Meredith called out.

Bailey and Mark entered the room, smiles on both of their faces. "Heard you were in labor," Bailey said. "I just wanted to stop by to say congratulations."

"I was just bored and figured you could use the distraction," Mark grinned, dropping down onto the couch under the window.

"I just got an epidural, so I'm feeling pretty good right now. I'm about halfway there. Just a few more hours… I hope," Meredith said. She saw the _Team Lilly _pins on both of their white jackets and smiled. "Nice pins."

"Stevens handed me one before she went into surgery with Hunt," Bailey said, patting it with her hand. "Figured I'd wear it before she gave me a guilt trip…"

Meredith laughed. "No, I'm flattered. My daughter has a posse."

"Apparently, she's in competition with all the other babies in the nursery," Derek said. "Even though she's not born yet."

"Competition? No such thing; she'll have them all beat," Mark said confidently. "My goddaughter is gonna be gorgeous."

Meredith smiled at that. "Thank you, Mark."

"So, have you threatened to castrate him yet?" Bailey asked Meredith, cocking her head toward Derek.

"I told him I hated his penis when my water broke in the hall earlier," Meredith said.

"Your water broke in the hall?" Mark asked. "Damn. I wish I could've been there for that."

"But ever since the epidural, I've been a happy camper. If I were to pee myself, I wouldn't know, and wouldn't care," Meredith said with a smile.

Mark narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously, and glanced at her IV bag. "You sure they didn't dope you up with morphine? Because you were pretty out of it that day..."

"Aah, yes. Appendectomy '06," Derek grinned. "I'll never forget that."

"You were high as a kite, Grey," Bailey admitted.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Okay, I have to push a baby out of a very small part of my body in a few hours. Can we not make fun of me? And it's not morphine in the IV; it's Pitocin."

"Have you picked up the dog yet?" Derek asked.

"Bridget's picking him up after work," Mark said, checking his watch. "She should be getting him soon."

"Don't be surprised if he hops in bed with you. He likes to cuddle," Meredith said before crunching on some ice chips from her pink plastic cup.

Mark groaned. "Great."

"Oh, and if you leave a newspaper lying around, he _will_ find it, and tear it to shreds for fun," Meredith warned him. "So, don't do that."

"And have him out to pee by seven, or he'll lick your face until you get up," Derek added.

"Anything else I need to know about Lassie?" Mark asked.

"No, I think that covers it," Meredith said. "Thank you, Mark. We appreciate you guys watching him for a few days."

"I get first dibs on holding the baby… you know, as a favor," Mark decided.

Bailey laughed. "You might have to fight Stevens for that privilege."

"Oh, someone tell her that there's to be no loitering outside the door while I'm pushing, please. That'll just freak me out," Meredith said.

"Not even me?" Mark asked.

"I'll keep them all away," Bailey promised. Her pager beeped and she pulled it from her pocket. "I have to go. There's an emergency coming into the pit. Come on, Sloan."

"I wasn't paged," Mark replied.

Bailey pointed toward the door. "I don't care. Up," she said, like a mother would address her child.

Mark hoisted himself off the couch and sighed. "Fine. But I'll be back."

"We know," Meredith and Derek said in unison.

The door clicked shut behind them, effectively taking away the current entertainment, and Meredith fidgeted to a more comfortable position in the bed as best she could, being numb from the waist down. She glanced at Derek, who smiled at her.

"What?" he asked.

Meredith bit her lip before speaking. "Should I call my dad?"

"Up to you," Derek said, muting the TV and turning toward her. "Might be nice, I guess. Or you could have Lexie call him, if that would be easier for you."

"You think she would?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "Or I could—if you wanted me to. I think he'd want to see you and Lilly after she's born."

"And you," Meredith added.

"I just meant…" he pursed his lips into a thin line, as if he was trying to choose the right words. "You're his daughter, and Lilly's his granddaughter. If I were him, I'd want to know. He cares about you."

"I know," she yawned, her relaxed body finally overcome with the need to sleep after all the pain she'd gone through for hours.

"How about I call him, and you try to sleep a little? It'll be good for you," he said.

"Okay," Meredith agreed. "I guess… just tell him he can stop by tomorrow if he wants. I kind of want tonight to be our night with her, you know, after we kick all our friends out..."

Derek leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Sure."

"Thank you."

He smiled. "Happy to do it."

…

Sleep lasted a blissful two hours before the pain began churning deep inside Meredith again, more acute this time than before. She blinked her eyes open and found Derek sitting by her bedside, rubbing her arm idly while he read a parenting magazine he'd probably snatched from the waiting room.

"Ouch," she croaked, running her hand over her face.

Derek turned toward her. "Hey, you're up," he said. "You okay?"

"Epidural is wearing off," Meredith said. She licked her dry lips and reached for her cup of water. "What time is it?"

"2:51," Derek replied, checking his watch. "You might need them to give you another dose of the meds."

Meredith shifted to a different position in bed, and her breath hitched in her throat. Pain and pressure. Heaping spoonfuls of both. She winced. "Crap."

"What?"

"I feel like I need to push," Meredith said.

Derek's eyes widened. "Yeah?"

"Hmm," she hummed in agreement, gripping onto the bedrails. "Can you get—"

"Going right now," Derek said, flinging the forgotten magazine onto the couch. He kissed her forehead. "I'll be right back, I promise."

Meredith dropped her head back onto the pillows and concentrated on the ceiling tiles. She only counted to fifteen by the time Derek came back in the room with Dr. Halloran, and sighed in relief.

"Feeling the urge to push?" Dr. Halloran asked, quickly washing her hands and putting on a pair of gloves.

"Yeah." She reached for Derek's hand and he took it almost instantly. "A lot," Meredith said.

"Okay, well let's see. You might be able to," Dr. Halloran said. "Just keep taking deep breaths." After she examined Meredith, she smiled. "Wow, I'm impressed. You went from five to ten, and your cervix is fully thinned out."

"So she's ready to push?" Derek asked.

Dr. Halloran pulled her gloves off and nodded. "Yes she is. The baby's head is down very low. I don't think you'll be pushing that long," she told Meredith.

"Holy crap," Meredith breathed, squeezing Derek's hand tightly.

"We'll get you all set up, then you're going to start pushing, okay?" Dr. Halloran said.

Meredith nodded. "Okay."

Derek blinked back the tears in his eyes and cupped her cheeks in his hands. "This is it, Mer," he said before kissing her.

Meredith kissed him back and smiled. "Yeah."

**I know. I suck. I'm sorry. If it's any consolation, the title of the next chapter is "Lilly." Make of that what you will. And I'm on spring break all next week, which hopefully means lots of writing time and more frequent updates. ;)  
**


	103. Lilly

**Disclaimer: Grey's owns me. Not the other way around.**

Derek blinked back the tears in his eyes and cupped her cheeks in his hands. "This is it, Mer," he said before kissing her.

Meredith kissed him back and smiled. "Yeah."

"I'm going to call my mom and let her know," Derek said. "Want me to call anyone? Cristina or…?"

"Yeah, you can call her or Iz. Or Alex. George. Whoever you call, the news will be all over the hospital thirty seconds later," Meredith said as she fixed her hair, pulling it back into a tighter ponytail so it would be out of her way while she pushed.

"True," Derek said, taking his phone off the nightstand. "Which means Mark might be setting up camp outside the door in ten minutes…"

Meredith laughed. "Probably," she said, her smile fading when the pain and pressure of another contraction hit her. She focused on Derek and bit her lip, fighting back the nearly unbearable need to push.

"Only a few more of those left," Derek comforted her. "Pretty soon, we'll be holding her."

"Make the calls before she comes out," Meredith said, letting go of his hand. "Seriously, if I cough, I swear she'll come shooting out of me."

Derek quickly dialed his mother's phone number and held it to his ear. "Calling now."

While Derek contacted his mom on the east coast and their friends scattered around the hospital, Stephanie assisted Dr. Halloran in setting Meredith up for delivery. Meredith watched as they worked, her heart pounding in her chest. It was the most surreal, terrifying, exciting moment of her life, all rolled into one, and the end result would be a tiny baby she and Derek made nine months before.

Tears burned in her eyes before she could stop them, and she wiped them with the back of her hand.

After getting off the phone with Cristina, Derek noticed she was crying and frowned. "Mer, what?" he asked.

"Nothing. I'm just…" Meredith smiled at him. "It's really time."

Derek reached for her hand. "You're gonna do great, Meredith," he said. He kissed her. "I love you, and I'm so proud of you."

"I love you too," Meredith said. "Oh, camera. Can you get it?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "My mom told me to tell you that she loves all three of us, and she's expecting pictures ASAP."

"Okay," Meredith said, her hand over her belly. This was one of the last times she would ever have Lilly inside her, and she wanted to savor those last few moments.

Derek turned the camera on stand-by mode, ready to take pictures as soon as Lilly was out. Meredith watched as he set it next to her pillow. "No vajayjay shots," she reminded him.

"Why are you calling it that?" he chuckled as he raised her bed up to a less reclined position so it would be easier for her to push.

Meredith shrugged. "Bailey said it once. I kinda like it. It's catchy."

"No… vajayjay shots," Derek promised, wincing as the word left his mouth.

Stephanie removed the end of the bed and secured the stirrups in place, and Meredith swallowed. "It's already going to be all "lights, camera, action" down there. We don't need hard copies in the photo album."

"I get it," he said, taking her hand again. "Oh, Cristina said good luck, and she's proud of you."

"She did?" Meredith asked, surprised.

"Yeah? Why?"

"I don't know. It's just… unexpected, I guess." Meredith smiled to herself. "It's nice to know that she's proud, that's all."

"We're all proud, Mer. Me more than anyone."

Meredith swallowed thickly when the tears popped into her eyes again. Even seconds before pushing, her hormones still offered her no mercy, and she knew they wouldn't go away any time soon. "I know."

"It's a beautiful afternoon to have a baby," Derek grinned, kissing the top of her head.

"How long have you been waiting to use that one?" Meredith laughed.

"Since the day I met you."

"Alright, we're all set," Dr. Halloran announced, smiling at both of them. "Meredith, are you ready?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, holding on tight to Derek's hand. "I want you to watch," she told him.

"I can see," Derek smiled. "I'll be right here the whole time."

"Would you like a mirror, Meredith?" Stephanie asked.

"Sure, why not?" Meredith replied as she guided her feet into the stirrups. "If everyone else gets to see, I want to, too."

Derek laughed, helping her get into position. "You're freakishly calm right now."

"Awkward and freaky, remember?" Meredith said. She inhaled and exhaled deeply and looked to Dr. Halloran just as another contraction came along. "Now?" she asked.

"Go ahead," Dr. Halloran agreed. "Push for ten seconds, then take a breath. Whenever you're ready…"

Meredith made sure her grip on Derek's hand was firm, then curled over herself, pushing as hard as she could.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten," Derek counted softly. "Good job, Meredith."

"Am I doing it right?" Meredith asked, gathering as much air into her lungs as she could before she had to push again.

"That was great," Dr. Halloran nodded. "Go again whenever you want."

Meredith bore down again for a never-ending ten seconds and tensed at the pressure she felt. "Ow ow ow," she groaned.

"You're an awesome pusher, Mer," Derek said.

Dr. Halloran smiled. "Yes, you are. Baby's head is coming down."

"Probably just a few more minutes," Derek told her.

"I have to push," Meredith said.

"Hold on just a minute until you have another contraction. Take a few breaths," Dr. Halloran said. "I know it's hard not to push, but it'll just be a few more seconds."

Meredith leaned back against the pillows and looked at Derek. "Holy crap," she panted. "This freaking hurts."

Derek kissed her forehead. "Mer, you're doing so good."

"Well, there goes my vagina. Sorry, I know you were fond of it," she told Derek with a sigh.

"I still am, I promise," Derek said when he couldn't think of how else to respond. He wiped the sweat beading on Meredith's hairline.

Meredith felt a contraction welling up inside her, and she looked at the doctor. "Now?"

Dr. Halloran nodded. "Go for it," she said. "Try for two in a row, if you can."

Meredith pushed through the pain, making it through two strong pushes before her contraction ended a minute later. She collapsed back onto the bed and closed her eyes. "I need to stop for a sec," she said.

"You okay?" Derek asked, rubbing the palm of his hand over her bent knee.

"Mhm," she breathed through her nose. "Can you see her yet?"

"Not yet. You're almost there," Derek said.

"You might be able to see the top of her head with the next push," Dr. Halloran encouraged. "Contraction should be coming soon."

Meredith leaned up and let go of Derek's hand. "My hand is sweaty," she said, wiping it on her gown. "So is yours."

Derek laughed, wiping his own hand on the thigh of his pants. "Sorry. Dry now," he said, taking hold of hers again.

"Holy—" Before she could finish the other half of her phrase, Meredith felt her body pushing instinctively, the contractions working in tandem with her.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten," Derek counted.

She moaned out loud at the pain and pressure she felt, wanting nothing more than to get Lilly out. "Ouch. Derek."

"Meredith," Derek said, breathless. "Oh, God, Mer. Look."

"What?" Meredith asked.

"Look in the mirror," he choked out, brushing away the tears under his eyes. "Oh my God."

Meredith looked down and saw the top of Lilly's head. "Oh, God," she gasped. She let the tears fall down her face. "Dark hair. I told you."

"Lots of dark hair," Dr. Halloran echoed. "Small push on the next contraction and her head will be out."

"Okay," Meredith said, focusing on her tiny daughter, and not the unbearable pain going on inside her. When the next contraction came, she held her eyes open and watched as Lilly's little head came out. "Holy crap," she said, both in pain and awe.

Derek exhaled a puff of air and ran a hand through his hair. "She's right there. You can do this, Meredith."

"Oh, God," Meredith whimpered. "She's… I really have to push."

"Take a nice deep breath. On the next contraction, you'll pass the shoulders, then she'll be out, okay?" Dr. Halloran said.

Meredith pushed with all she had, biting down hard on her lip. She felt like screaming but held back, because she wanted Lilly to be born into calmness. That was the plan from the beginning. She watched as the rest of Lilly emerged, gasping when she felt the baby slip out of her.

"3:47 PM," Stephanie said, recording it in Meredith's chart. "Beautiful baby girl. Congratulations."

"Meredith," Derek said, his voice barely above a whisper. "Oh my God, Mer. You did it." He brushed the tears off his face with the back of his hand and kissed her, cupping her cheeks in his palms. "I love you so much."

"I love you," Meredith said, her eyes burning and blurring over with a thick sheen of tears. She blinked and they fell in streams, but she didn't care enough to wipe them off. "Oh, God."

Dr. Halloran gently placed Lilly on Meredith's chest, and Meredith wrapped her arms around the wet, squirmy baby. "Oh, God. You're really here," she sniffled.

"She's so beautiful," Derek said, placing a hand on Lilly's back.

Stephanie suctioned out her nose and throat quickly and carefully, and Dr. Halloran clamped off Lilly's umbilical cord. She handed Derek a pair of scissors. "Want to cut the cord, Dad?" she asked him.

Derek tore his eyes away from his daughter and took the scissors, cutting Lilly's umbilical cord with all the delicate precision of a surgeon. Lilly sucked in her first breath and wailed, her tiny baby cry bouncing off the four walls of the room.

Out in the hall, Meredith and Derek both heard claps and cheers, the happy noises of their friends, who despite being asked otherwise, camped themselves outside the room anyway, waiting for the telltale sign of a crying baby before celebrating.

"Hi, Lilly," Derek said, kissing the top of her head and wrapping the blanket around her to keep her warm.

Meredith offered Lilly her finger and the baby held onto it like a lifeline, her other tiny hand clutching onto the hospital gown Meredith was wearing. "It's okay. You're okay," she said.

Lilly's eyes blinked open and she looked at Meredith, a pair of crystal blue irises staring back at her. Meredith took in a shaky breath. "Hi," she whispered. "It's Mommy."

The baby's crying went down a few octaves and she pressed her cheek into the warmth of Meredith's chest.

"She knows who you are," he said softly, tucking Lilly's feet into the blanket before taking a few pictures. "I'm Daddy," Derek said as he leaned down and kissed Lilly's hand, the one that held Meredith's finger. "We love you so much."

Lilly blinked as she took in her surroundings, her eyes finally landing on Derek's face. She let out a small sob followed by a hiccup, releasing her death grip on Meredith's gown and unclenching her hand to stretch her fingers.

Derek grinned. "She waved to me," he said proudly.

"Uh huh," Meredith giggled through her tears.

"We need to check her out, but we'll bring her right back," Stephanie said.

Meredith swallowed nervously. Not even introduced to her daughter a minute ago, and the mother lion in her was already in full force with the need to keep her safe. "I… okay," she consented.

Meredith shooed Derek off toward Stephanie. "Go, go," she said. "Stay with Lilly."

"You sure?"

"If I can't be over there, you have to be," she said, brushing some flyaway hairs from her face.

Stephanie took Lilly over to the scale and gently set her down on it. Lilly's crying escalated again when the cold air hit her skin, and it took all Meredith had not to jump out of the bed and pick her up.

"Is she okay?" Meredith asked Derek, who stood right next to Stephanie and got more pictures of the baby.

Derek turned around and smiled. "She's perfect, Meredith."

"Six pounds, seven ounces. Eighteen inches long," Stephanie announced happily. "Petite little girl," she said, walking her over to the warmed isolette. "Her name is Lilly?"

"Lilly Grace," Derek replied, letting the baby hold onto his finger while Stephanie took her footprints. "Ten fingers and ten toes," he told Meredith.

Meredith smiled. "Good to know."

While Lilly was getting her prints and checkup done, Meredith delivered the afterbirth, which was a blissful experience compared to pushing out a six pound human, slipped into her third gown, and got resettled into bed.

Derek didn't leave Lilly's side as he called his mom and their friends with all the information, sending as many pictures as he could.

_Meredith was amazing. Only a few pushes. 3:47 PM. Six pounds. Seven ounces. Eighteen inches. Dark hair. Blue eyes. Good set of lungs. They're both doing great. Lilly is healthy. Gorgeous. Perfect. Incredible_, he said over and over again.

He wiped his tears with his shirtsleeves as he spoke, the euphoria in his voice unlike anything Meredith ever heard before.

Meredith watched as Dr. Halloran gave Lilly her newborn checkup, itching with the need to be with her baby again. After housing her for nine months, even ten minutes without Lilly seemed too long to go without holding her.

"How is she?" Meredith asked.

"We cleaned her up so she's all nice and pretty for you. She passed the APGAR with flying colors," Dr. Halloran said. "We just need to take a small blood sample from her heel and give her the Hep-B shot."

Meredith swallowed. "Wait. Could—Do you have to do that now? I mean, can we wait to do that?" she asked, her eyes burning with more tears at the thought of Lilly feeling any pain.

"It'll only take a second, Mer," Derek said, trying to downplay it even though he was nervous, too. "How about… can I hold her while you do it?"

Dr. Halloran nodded. "Sure; that would be fine."

Derek picked Lilly up and held her close to him, popping her tiny leg and foot free from the blanket. "It's okay, sweetie," he cooed, running his finger over her soft cheek. Dr. Halloran did the test as fast as she could, then gave her the shot in her thigh, and Lilly only cried for a few seconds, but it was enough to make Meredith restless.

"All done, right?" Meredith asked.

"All done," Dr. Halloran echoed. "Newborns tend to get cold easily until their body temps. adjust to the outside world, so be sure to put a diaper on her, or she might pee on you," the doctor smiled. "Did you take lactation classes?"

"We did," Meredith replied, relieved when Derek placed Lilly into her arms.

"Okay, well then you know the basics. She'll probably be hungry soon. Your body might not be producing milk readily yet, but the colostrum is just as important, so make sure you keep at it. The more stimulation, the quicker you'll produce. If you have any problems, feel free to page the nurses' station. We'll send in a lactation consultant for you."

"Okay," Derek replied, taking a fresh diaper from the bassinet next to Meredith's bed.

"She's all yours, and in perfect health. I'll be back in a little while to check on you," Dr. Halloran said, scribbling down a few last notes in Meredith's and now Lilly's chart. She smiled at the two of them. "Congratulations. She's beautiful."

Meredith returned the smile. "Thank you so much."

Both the nurse and the doctor left the room, and Meredith and Derek finally had some alone time with their daughter, who was content to lie in Meredith's arms.

"She's the most beautiful little human I've ever seen," Meredith said, stroking Lilly's pudgy little hand with her finger.

"I can't believe she's out. It's…" Derek exhaled. "It doesn't feel real yet."

"It doesn't," Meredith laughed. She lowered her head and kissed Lilly's forehead, making sure her little pink cap covered her ears.

"My mom is so proud of you, by the way. She can't believe you already had her," Derek said. "And all of our friends are freaking out," he said as his phone signaled another congratulatory message.

Meredith gently set Lilly down on top of her legs so they could put a diaper on her and smiled. "I'm sure balloons will be arriving within the hour."

"And streamers and confetti and flowers," Derek added. Lilly squirmed as Meredith moved her, and she glanced at Derek in disapproval, seeming annoyed at being taken away from the warmth Meredith offered her. "She's making a face," he chuckled. "God, this is…"

"Surreal? Freaky?" Meredith offered. "Aww, it's okay. We just need to put a diaper on you," she said soothingly before gently unwrapping the pink blanket.

"She's so tiny. I thought she would be… bigger," Derek said, leaning over the bed to make sure her hospital bracelets weren't too tight. "One on the ankle and the wrist..."

"The ankle one has an alarm in it," Meredith said. "High security, which is good. All of our bracelets match. Not that you should be worried. You're safe, sweetpea."

Derek kissed the baby's forehead. "I don't even want her out of this room. And if she has to, I'm going with her."

"No, no nursery sleepovers. It's been a stressful day. I want her with us," Meredith agreed. "Alright, diaper time."

"She has skinny little chicken legs."

"I thought she'd be bigger, too," Meredith said. She smiled down at their baby. "You certainly felt bigger when you were coming out of me," she laughed.

"How are you doing?" Derek asked. "Sore?"

Meredith shrugged. "A little, yeah," she said. "Worth it, though. Yes it was," she cooed to Lilly. "Mommy will try to feed you as soon as we get this diaper on."

Meredith lifted up her legs while Derek slid the newborn diaper under her tiny bottom. "Her butt is really cute," Derek laughed.

"It's so tiny," Meredith smiled as Lilly fussed a little at the cold.

"I don't think you like being naked, do you?" Derek asked, sticking the adhesive on one side while Meredith did the other.

Meredith checked the bottom of her foot and her thigh. "Not bleeding," she sighed in relief. "I'm sorry about that, Lilly. It's been a rough few hours, huh?"

Lilly yawned, her mouth opening into a tiny O shape, and they both smiled as they slipped her little body into a slightly oversized onesie. "Are you sleepy?" Derek asked. "We could all use some quiet time."

"I suck at swaddling," Meredith said after several attempts to rewrap Lilly in her blanket.

"I'll teach you." Derek got up from the chair at her bedside and handed the baby to Meredith. "We're new at this, sweetie. Be patient," he chuckled. He flattened the blanket on Meredith's legs and folded down one corner for Lilly's head.

"Alright, here we go," he said, carefully laying the baby down on top. Derek folded all of the sides in and made sure it was loose enough to be comfy, but snug enough to keep Lilly warm and feel secure, like all of the books advised.

Meredith smiled. "You're very good at that."

"I can swaddle and diaper anything," he grinned. "Lots of practice over the years."

"Hmm, sixteenth grandchild; tenth niece," Meredith remembered, cradling Lilly close to her chest. She patted the side of the bed. "Sit."

Derek shook his head. "You're sore. I don't want to jostle you around."

"You won't," Meredith said. When Derek didn't move, Meredith smirked at him. "Okay, I pushed a baby out for you today. You're really in no position to argue with me."

"Okay," Derek laughed, taking the baby from Meredith while she carefully scooted over on the bed.

"Ow," she winced, squeezing her eyes shut. "I think I'll be walking like a cowboy for a while."

Derek smiled at her sympathetically. "You were great today. All day," he said. "From the moment we got up this morning." He gently sat down on the bed next to her, taking extra caution not to bounce or move too much. Once he got settled, he tilted her chin toward him and kissed his wife, their baby between them.

"Thank you," Meredith whispered against his lips.

"Seriously, you've never taken my breath away more than you did today," he said. He went to speak but closed his mouth, unable to come up with something that felt adequate. Tears stung his eyes. "You gave me a daughter today."

Meredith wiped the tears off his stubbly face with her hand and kissed him again. "And I'd do it again. All of it," she said, her voice trailing off as she spoke. She was crying, again, and she didn't care. "We made her, Derek. This perfect little person."

Derek held Lilly out in front of them, and the baby opened her eyes, blinking curiously at both of them. "God, she's perfect," he breathed.

"Your eyes," Meredith said.

"Both of our eyes. There's a little green around her pupils, see?"

Derek handed Lilly to Meredith and she looked into her daughter's eyes. Lilly stared back at her with a contented, trusting look, the kind of look a child has for her parents. Meredith smiled. "There is a little green in her eyes."

"Told you."

"She has your hair and chin. Oh, and feet. Perfectly arched, only a lot smaller."

"Her nose and lips are you. And her tininess," Derek smiled. "I think you're the smallest grandchild."

"Really?"

Derek nodded. "And the cutest, most perfect one, too."

"Derek."

"What? It's true," he said.

"She is kind of perfect," Meredith couldn't help but agree. "And so pretty. Seriously, I don't care if that makes us braggers. She's beautiful."

Derek kissed Meredith's cheek. "She really is."

Lilly let out a small cry and her face scrunched up adorably, her lower lip pouting at them. Derek laughed. "Oh, what's that face for?" he asked.

"Are you hungry?" Meredith asked, unsnapping the shoulder of her gown. "Wanna try eating, Lilly?

Derek put the baby in Meredith's arms once she was ready, and she guided Lilly's mouth to her breast. "Here we go," Meredith whispered. "Just, uh… oh! You did it kind of," she cheered softly.

Seconds after Lilly opened her mouth, she let go of Meredith's nipple and looked up at her with an unsure expression on her tiny face.

"Barely out of the womb for an hour, and she already makes the best faces at us," Derek teased.

Meredith laughed. "I think I confused her when I cheered her on. I'm sorry, peanut. Try again," she cooed, shifting the baby in her arms. She cupped the baby's head in her palm and made sure Lilly's mouth lined up with her nipple, hoping the extra guidance would help make it easier on her.

Instead, Lilly decided to move her head and root around on her own, mashing her lips against Meredith's skin. Meredith smiled. "Lilly, it's right here. You can do it."

"Think you should just do it for her, at least until she gets used to the idea?" Derek asked.

"I guess," Meredith said, frowning when Lilly's lower lip quivered, a telltale sign of a pending wail or sob or full-on cry fest. "She's probably just hungry and frustrated. It's alright, Lilly. I'll help."

Meredith lined Lilly up again in one arm, and with the other hand, placed her nipple into the baby's mouth. Lilly latched on and started sucking. "She's doing it," Meredith whispered excitedly. "Ow. Wow. You're hungry, huh?"

"Hurts?" Derek asked.

"Not really. Just feels… weird," Meredith replied, keeping Lilly's head cradled in her palm and her body in the other arm. "Think she's getting anything?"

"If she wasn't, she probably would've let go by now," Derek said.

Lilly slipped off and let out a soft little cry. "It's okay. I'll fix it," Meredith comforted her. She gently maneuvered Lilly's right arm from the blanket and placed the baby's hand on top of her breast. "There. Now you can hold onto me, okay?" she said.

"Impressive," Derek said proudly. "Where'd you learn that?"

"Oh. I didn't. I just thought it might help her," Meredith shrugged as she helped Lilly latch back on to her breast. Lilly splayed her fingers over Meredith's skin as she ate and Meredith kissed her forehead. "Skin to skin contact. It's comforting."

"Mommy instincts are already in full force," Derek grinned. "Like I said… impressive."

Lilly made little sucking noises with her mouth as she nursed, and Meredith snuggled their daughter close to her chest. Meredith looked at Derek and smiled. "So, we're really parents now?"

Derek exhaled in disbelief, staring down at his daughter. "Hmm, how crazy is that?"

Meredith laughed softly so as not to disturb Lilly. "Very." She rested her head on Derek's shoulder. "She believed in us all along. She knew we would get it right."

"She makes it all worth it. Everything," Derek said.

Meredith tucked Lilly's ear under the cap and smiled down at the baby she made nine months ago with her husband. "She does."


	104. The First Few Hours

**Disclaimer #1: Still not mine.**

**Disclaimer #2: So, the baby is finally here, and Meredith and Derek are new parents, trying to figure it all out. I hope you enjoy what I have planned, and don't mind all of the gross, adorable baby things, like bodily functions, etc. We all watch Grey's, and have dealt with much more than dirty diapers and spit up. Also, I'm not a parent, but have been babysitting the cutest little girl ever since she was a newborn. She's two now, and I think I've seen it all: the good, the bad, the completely adorable, and the gross, and she's given me tons of material for this fic, which I'll thank her for one day. ;) Anyway, enough with the rambling. Enjoy! **

_Lilly Grace Shepherd. Born June 5th. 3:47 PM. 6 lbs., 7 ozs. 18 in. Mother: Meredith. Father: Derek_, read the information on the small pink card tucked into the plastic holder inside Lilly's bassinet where she slept.

After her feeding, the baby fell asleep in Meredith's arms, and Meredith began to come down from the energy of the day, and her eyelids slipped shut, too.

Derek took the baby from his wife and cradled her, eventually putting her into the bassinet at the bedside. _Sleep when the baby sleeps_, advice passed down from his mother, and every baby book ever written. After making sure Lilly was comfortably sleeping, Derek got back into the bed next to Meredith and slept.

Two hours passed in silence until Lilly began wriggling around in her blanket. She let out a small cry and both Meredith and Derek's eyes flashed open, already overtaken by parenthood.

Meredith swung her legs over the side of the bed without thinking and grimaced at the sudden movement. "Ouch," she winced.

"Mer, I can get her," Derek said as he sat up.

"No, no. I got her," Meredith replied, walking around to the other side of the bed to the bassinet. "I'm supposed to be up walking a few hours after birth anyway. I'm fine." She scooped Lilly up from the bassinet and bounced her in her arms.

"Hi," she whispered. "Did you sleep well, Lillybug?"

Derek smiled. "Lillybug?"

"She needs a nickname," Meredith said, fixing the waistline of her sweatpants. "I think it fits her."

"I love it," Derek chuckled, moving over to the other side of the bed so Meredith didn't have to walk back around.

Meredith sat back down on the bed and brushed her finger over the baby's soft cheek. "I think she got even cuter while she slept," Meredith giggled.

"She really did," he grinned, watching as Meredith took Lilly's pink cap off. "What're you doing?"

"Looking at her hair," Meredith said, gently smoothing her fingers over Lilly's head of soft dark hair. "Just like yours."

Derek looked down at his little girl and shook his head in awe. "I could literally stare at her all day," he said.

"Little pieces of both of us… which makes sense genetically, I guess," she teased. "But still. Without us, she wouldn't be here."

"Hmm, we make beautiful little human beings together." He pressed his lips to Meredith's temple and smiled. "We should just retire. Spend all our time making more babies."

"I want another one," Meredith said. Derek looked at her like she had two heads and she laughed. "I don't mean we have to get started right now, obviously. If my you-know-what could talk, it would be ranting. But I already miss being pregnant. It's weird having her on the outside."

"Well, you got seven extra days," Derek pointed out. He let Lilly grab onto his finger. "You were a full week late, Lillybug." He grinned at Meredith. "Yeah, that nickname's gonna stick."

"Good, right?"

Derek laughed. "Very good choice." Meredith's phone blinked as she got a text, and he reached for it on the nightstand. "Izzie," he said.

"What'd she say?"

"Up for visitors tonight?" Derek read from her phone. He turned to Meredith. "Up to you."

"Yeah, they can come. At least for a little while," Meredith agreed. "They've been waiting patiently all day. I want to nurse her again, then they can stop by. Ask if they don't mind waiting like forty-five minutes."

Derek typed back the message into the phone, and got a reply seconds later. "She said okay, with an exclamation point and a smiley face," he laughed.

"Okay, good," Meredith giggled. She fitted Lilly's cap back on her head. "Mommy's going to feed you, then you're going to meet a few very overexcited aunts and uncles," she told the baby.

Lilly blinked at her and stuck out her little tongue. Derek felt his heart skip in his chest at how fascinating his daughter was, and reached for her while Meredith adjusted her tee shirt. "God, I love you," he said, kissing the baby's cheek.

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. She always knew that Derek would make an incredible father, but to actually see him with their daughter, hugging, kissing, and talking to her, literally took her breath away. "I've never seen you like this before."

"I've never had a daughter before," he said softly.

She saw the tears in his eyes and rubbed her hand along his arm. "Yeah."

Derek handed Lilly to Meredith so she could nurse, smiling at how at ease and in control Meredith was already. She just seemed to know what to do, even though no one told her how. Incalculable amounts of love and pride welled up inside him.

"Alright, other side this time," Meredith said. "Ready, Lilly?" It took a few tries, but Meredith finally got Lilly to latch on, her tiny hand resting on top of Meredith's breast again.

"You two are really good at that," Derek complimented.

"Teamwork," she replied. "That, and she's clearly a genius."

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith's shoulder, careful not to jostle Lilly while she nursed. "Smart and beautiful, like you."

Meredith laughed. "Are you flirting with me, Dr. Shepherd? Remember, I'm celibate for six weeks."

"Doesn't mean I can't flirt, especially when what I'm saying it true," he upheld. He kissed the top of her head. "Love you."

"Love you too," she whispered, rubbing her hand up and down the baby's back while she ate. "Look at how tiny her fingernails are."

"I know. And her little hands." Derek brushed his finger along the back of Lilly's hand gently as it sat on top of Meredith's breast. "These are surgeon hands. They run in the Grey lineage."

Meredith smiled sadly. "Yeah."

"Hey, you okay?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. I'm fine; it's just… I kind of wish my mom was alive to meet her. I think she would've been proud." Meredith shook her head. "Or, I don't know. Maybe."

"She would have."

"You think so?" she asked.

Derek looked at his daughter as she peacefully nursed and he smiled. "How could she not have been? Look at her. She's incredible."

"Yeah. She is," Meredith agreed. She weaved her fingers through Derek's. "I know you wish your dad could be here, too."

"Yeah I do," Derek admitted. "It's okay, you know. It's okay to be sad about it. But just because they're not here doesn't mean Lilly won't know who they were. We'll make sure she knows all about them."

With her free hand, she put her hand on his cheek and kissed him. "Okay," she whispered.

"Is she sleeping?" Derek asked.

Meredith looked down at Lilly, her squishy, warm body snuggled against her own. "She's still sucking, but I guess she might be," Meredith said before smiling. "She has really long eyelashes."

"And dark, too," he noticed. "We both have dark eyelashes, but the length she got from you."

"I think she's a good mix of both of us," Meredith said. "How weird is it that we made a person?"

Derek laughed. "I know. I never even really thought about it, but it's…" He shook his head. "Yeah. It's unbelievable."

When Lilly decided she was finished a few minutes later, she unlatched on her own and yawned widely. She stared up at them, a content expression on her tiny face. "All done?" Meredith asked, wiping the excess off the corners of the baby's mouth with her fingers.

"You're a good eater," Derek said. He took the baby while Meredith readjusted her shirt, propping her over his shoulder to burp her. "Can you burp for me?"

"She might spit up on you," Meredith warned him playfully. "Use this," she said, grabbing a dry wash cloth on her nightstand and draping it over his shoulder. "There you go. Now you can spit up."

"Oh, yeah. Encourage spitting up," Derek laughed. He kissed the baby's cheek as he patted her back. "It's okay; you can. Daddy won't mind."

"I really need to pee," Meredith said, gently stepping over the side of the bed and putting on her flip flops. "Wait for me to come back before you do anything cute," she told Lilly.

"Take your time," he replied. "Lilly and I are just fine, aren't we?" he said to the baby. Lilly let out a tiny burp and a grin spread over Derek's face that creased his eyes. "You burped!"

Meredith turned around on her slow walk to the bathroom. "She did?" Meredith asked in surprise. "Good job, peanut."

"We're gonna celebrate everything you do, so be forewarned," Derek advised his daughter. "Me, especially. You know, pulling out the potty pictures when your boyfriends visit. You won't be using a potty for a couple years. Just enjoy the diapers for now. And boyfriends? We'll save them for when you're twenty. Okay?"

Lilly made a gurgling sound and hiccupped, and Derek smiled. "That's it, get out all the bubbles in your belly. Once Mommy gets back, we'll change you."

Meredith shuffled out of the bathroom, careful not to move too quickly because her body still felt a little worn out after delivery. Derek glanced up at her. "Hey. You okay?"

"Yeah. I was a little afraid, but I'm fine," she said.

"Afraid?"

Meredith laughed slightly and waved it off. "I know you're my husband, but anything I said would be TMI.."

Derek frowned. "What? Why?"

"I pushed a baby out of my body a few hours ago. I'm sore, that's all," she shrugged. "Plus, I was afraid to look."

"Everything goes back to normal. It just takes a few days," Derek comforted her.

"Says the penis-owning man," Meredith smirked at him as she took a fresh diaper and a onesie from the stack on the shelf under Lilly's bassinet. "How is she?"

"You mean since you saw her two minutes ago?" he teased. "She's good. Still perfect."

Meredith eased back into the bed and leaned into him. "Good," she said softly. "They're going to be here soon, so we should probably—"

Lilly let out a rumbling sound from underneath the blanket, and both of their mouths went wide in awe and amusement. "Whoa," Derek chuckled.

Meredith laughed. "Did you just fart on Daddy?" she asked the baby. "I wish that was on tape or something."

"I think I just fell even more in love with you," Derek said, hugging Lilly to him and pressing kisses to her forehead. "That was impressive."

"Do you feel better, huh?" Meredith asked as Derek gently laid the baby down on top of the bed between them. "Parenthood really throws all modesty out the window... and she got that from you, you know. The gassiness."

"Me? What about you? You're like a trucker," Derek argued.

"I am not."

Derek snorted. "All the Taco Bell you consumed in the last nine months?" He smiled down at Lilly as he unswaddled her from her blanket. "Mommy will deny it until she's blue in the face, but believe me, Lilly. It's true," he whispered loudly so Meredith would hear.

Meredith smacked him lightly with her hand. "Shut up," she smirked. "You can do it all you want, Lilly. Just because he teases me doesn't mean he'll tease you."

"I wasn't teasing."

"Uh huh. Okay. Just wait," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "Wait for what?"

"I don't know," Meredith shrugged. "I'm tired. It's an empty threat," she said, unpeeling the adhesive on Lilly's diaper. "Can you get the wipes?"

"Yeah." Derek leaned over the bed and grabbed them off the shelf under the bassinet. "Did she pee?"

"Yes, she did. Good job," Meredith said softly, rubbing Lilly's stomach with her finger. She took a wipe from the pack Derek handed her. "Can you hold up her legs?"

"This is our first real diaper change," Derek grinned, gently holding up the baby's legs while Meredith cleaned her.

Meredith smiled. "Not so hard."

Lilly started to cry when the cold air touched her wet skin, and her forehead scrunched up with wrinkles as her face reddened. Meredith finished wiping her and pulled out the used diaper from underneath her bottom. "I know. You're okay," she cooed.

Derek slid the fresh diaper under the baby and they quickly fastened the sides together. "She's even cute when she cries," he said, unsnapping the crotch snaps on her tiny white onesie so they could dress her in it.

"She's going to make me start crying," Meredith replied. "Here, I'll lift her up. You slip it over her head."

"Okay," Derek said, gently easing the outfit past Lilly's head.

They each took an arm and delicately maneuvered them into the long sleeves, and Meredith pulled it over her belly, careful not to rub the fabric against her belly button clamp. She snapped it between her legs with ease, then examined their efforts, making sure Lilly was comfortable.

"Either you had a kid you forgot about, or you're a natural at this," Derek said, reaching for a pair of socks.

Meredith picked Lilly up and hugged her to her chest. "Well, I had to do it fast. Seeing that sad, gummy cry is enough to kill me. Seriously, I'm surprised my boobs aren't leaking," she teased, bouncing the baby soothingly as her crying dwindled down and eventually stopped.

"All clean and warm now," Derek said while slipping Lilly's tiny feet into the small cotton socks.

There was a short knock at the door, and Izzie poked her head in tentatively. "Hey," she said softly. "Can we come say hi? If you'd rather we come back tomorrow, that's fine."

"No, no. Come in," Meredith smiled as she wrapped Lilly back up in her blanket. "We just got done changing her."

Izzie opened the door and walked in with a handful of pink balloons, followed by Alex, Cristina, and George, all of them stopping in mid-step when they saw the baby snuggled to Meredith's chest.

"She's so tiny," Izzie whispered, peeking over the bed to see Lilly. "Oh, you guys, she's beautiful."

"Thank you," Derek replied. He waved everyone else over so they could get a better look at the baby. "Who wants to hold her first?"

"Izzie called it months ago," Meredith said, kissing Lilly's forehead before holding her out to Izzie. "She's sleepy, so she probably won't cry."

Izzie accepted the baby into her arms and smiled down at her. "Hi," she said. She sniffled back tears. "Okay, seriously, she's the prettiest baby I've ever seen." Lilly blinked her eyes open and yawned.

"Her eyes are really blue," Alex commented as he stood next to Izzie. "I don't do that chick crap, but yeah, she's pretty damn cute."

Meredith laughed. "Thanks, Alex," she said. "Oh, and I want you to hold her, too. Don't think you're getting out of it."

"How do you feel?" George asked.

"Like I shot a watermelon out of my hoohoo," Meredith replied. "But having an awesome baby totally makes up for that. She even learned how to nurse already."

Izzie brushed her finger over Lilly's cheek. "That's because you're smart. And so freaking cute," she cooed. "I don't know who she looks like more. She looks a lot like both of you."

"Still not ever doing it," Cristina maintained, leaning against the nightstand.

"Oh, shut up and hold the baby. I swear you'll change your mind," Izzie said as she gently passed the baby over to Cristina.

Cristina held Lilly at arm's length and Derek laughed. "She's not gonna explode. Hold her like a baby, Yang."

"I'm not good with babies," Cristina replied, moving Lilly closer to her chest. "Please don't spit up on me." Lilly stretched out her hand from the blanket and yawned, and Cristina smiled.

Meredith noticed the look on her friend's face. "See? Pretty good, right?"

"Fine, she's cute," Cristina admitted, looking down at the baby. "You know, I have lots of stories about your mom. When you turn twenty-one, we'll go out for a drink and I'll clue you in."

"You will not," Meredith giggled.

"Oh, almost forgot. Sloan said he'd stop by tomorrow," Izzie said. "He asked me to pass the message along on his way out."

"He probably just wants to meet her without having to share with anyone else," Derek joked.

"You're hogging her," George said, reaching out his arms to Cristina. "I want a turn."

Cristina reluctantly handed Lilly over to George, who looked like a kid on Christmas morning. He smiled widely and bounced a little on his heels. "Hi. You're so cute. Yes you are," he cooed in his signature baby voice. "I'm your Uncle George, by the way. It's really cool that you're here. I'm gonna teach you lots of stuff. Like... oh! Like how to do an appendectomy without almost killing the guy. I took out your mom's appendix, you know."

"Big deal. I can teach her how to do a heart transplant," Cristina countered.

"You can all teach her all of that stuff. We just need to get through tonight first," Derek chuckled.

"Did she sleep at all for you?" Izzie asked, motioning for George to hand the baby over to Alex, who was the only one who hadn't yet had his turn.

Meredith nodded. "She slept for two hours, then she was hungry again. She's a very good eater."

"Please, don't tell us about your boobs," Cristina winced. "It's creepy enough thinking she came out of your girl parts a few hours ago..."

"Yeah, because I was going to pop a boob out and feed her with all of you standing here," Meredith said sarcastically.

Alex whistled. "That would be hot," he said, carefully taking Lilly in his arms when George finally passed her over. "Hey there," Alex said with a smile. "She looks a lot like you, Mer."

"Take the hat off," Meredith said.

Alex peeked under Lilly's pink knit cap and laughed. "Yeah. Okay. The hair is definitely yours, Shepherd."

"That was a given. Creepy perfect hair has to be passed down in the DNA," Cristina pointed out.

"When are you being discharged?" George asked.

"Tomorrow afternoon sometime. I could stay until midnight, but that would be stupid," Meredith shrugged.

"I'll stop by your house tonight after work and put all the food I made in the freezer," Izzie said. "Lasagna, chicken, pasta, things like that. Oh, and I made you a few desserts. I wanted to make sure you had enough since you won't feel like cooking."

"She didn't even share it with me. I had to eat leftover pizza," Alex said, laughing a little when Lilly stuck her tongue out at him.

Cristina scoffed. "You made them all that food just because they had a baby? Jeez, maybe I should have a kid."

"We appreciate it, Iz. Thank you," Meredith smiled.

Lilly let out a small fussy sound and blinked sleepily around the room, her eyes staying on Meredith once she spotted her, as though she sought the security of her mother's arms again. Alex walked over to the bed to pass the baby back to her. "She's pretty awesome," he said. "Congrats, you guys."

"Thank you," Meredith said softly, hugging Lilly to her chest once again. Lilly turned into her and tucked her little fist under her chin, her eyes slowly slipping shut.

"You're such a mommy already. I wanna cry," Izzie practically gushed as she watched Meredith cradle the baby.

Cristina let out a puff of air and sighed. "Congratulations, universe. You actually turned Meredith Grey, queen of tequila and one night stands, into Motherhood Barbie."

"I owe the universe fifty bucks," Alex joked, opening the door as the group got ready to leave for the night.

"We're so happy for you. She's gorgeous," Izzie said. "If you need anything, let me know," she offered, sneaking one last peek at the baby before walking toward the door. "And congrats again."

"Thanks, guys. And thanks for stopping by. It really means a lot," Derek said sincerely, wrapping his arms around Meredith's shoulders.

Izzie smiled. "We love you guys," she said. "See you tomorrow."

"Bye," Meredith waved with her free hand.

Once the four of them trailed out and the door clicked shut behind them, Meredith leaned into Derek and yawned. "I'm glad they came by."

"Hmm, me too," he said, kissing the top of her head. "Tired?"

"Yeah, but I don't wanna sleep. She might need me," Meredith said.

"We both like to sleep. Maybe she'll be a good sleeper."

"You just jinxed that one," Meredith smirked. "I know she's tired though. She might just wake up to eat a few times."

Derek ran a hand through his hair and kicked off his shoes onto the floor. "It's been a long day," he said. "A long, happy day."

"Very happy day," she said softly. "I wouldn't change a minute of it, even the pain."

"I love you," Derek said, pressing his lips to hers. He gently leaned in and kissed Lilly's forehead. "And I love you," he whispered.

"We love you, too."

"Want me to lay her in the bassinet?" Derek asked.

Meredith smiled down at the baby, her tiny body comfortable and relaxed in her arm. "I just want to look at her for a few more minutes."

"Me too."


	105. One Day Old

**Disclaimer: Shonda owns it, not me.  
**

**Sorry for the lack of updates lately. I meant to have this up early yesterday, but this site was being especially difficult, and not letting me post. (Sorry if I flooded any inboxes!) College graduation is approaching, so I'm extra busy, but I'm going to try to write/post more often. As always, thank you for your patience, and enjoy! :)  
**

Day two of Lilly's life outside the womb, and already, she was taking charge. Sleep came in the form of short naps the night before, with Meredith waking every three hours to feed the baby. Not that either of them minded. Even a sleepless night trumped sending her off to the nursery. Lilly was theirs, and even the thought of having her sleep all the way down the hall was unbearable.

It was just after eight in the morning when Lilly decided she was hungry again, and she let out a small cry, alerting her parents to pick her up and feed her. They heard the tiny wail coming from the bassinet next to the hospital bed, and Derek immediately reached over and scooped her up.

"Good morning," he greeted her. "The sun's actually out now, which is nice."

Meredith glanced over at the clock on her nightstand. "The last time she ate, it was 5:15," she said, feeling along her chest. "My boobs feel a little full. She's probably hungry."

"We got through the first night... without help from anyone. I'd say that's pretty impressive," Derek boasted while Meredith adjusted her shirt.

"I think so," Meredith laughed tiredly. Derek handed Lilly to her, and she held the baby to her breast. "Ready, peanut?" she asked. Lilly rested her tiny hand on top without Meredith even putting it there, and she helped the baby latch on. "There you go."

"Good job," Derek encouraged his daughter. "I'm glad we kept her here last night."

"Me too."

There was a short knock on the door, then Dr. Halloran entered their room holding both Meredith's and Lilly's charts. "Good morning," she smiled. "How are you doing today? Feeling okay?"

"I feel good. A little sore, but other than that, I'm fine," Meredith replied. "And Lilly is perfect. Really no issues with nursing, either."

Dr. Halloran recorded all of that into the chart and nodded. "Very good," she said. "Any bleeding or cramping?"

"Spotting, mostly. My abdomen feels tender, but not really crampy," Meredith shrugged. "But that's normal, right?"

"Absolutely. As long as it's in small amounts, there's nothing to worry about. And the abdominal pain is normal, too. Childbirth takes a real toll on your body, so some discomfort is to be expected," the doctor explained.

"Okay," Meredith said.

"Looks like you have a good eater," Dr. Halloran commented when she saw Lilly nursing. "Sometimes, babies are hesitant or get stressed. But it seems like you guys are doing just fine. How about her plumbing? Any dirty diapers?"

"She's peed a few times, and has had some gas. Nothing else yet," Derek answered.

"Give her a few hours. I'm sure something's coming," Dr. Halloran laughed. "Any questions for me?"

Meredith ran a hand through her tangled hair and messy bun. "I can shower, right? I wanted to get one last night, but I was exhausted."

"Oh, sure. Would you like me to take her to the nursery, so you both have some time to freshen up?" the doctor offered.

"No, we're okay," Meredith said, hugging Lilly close to her chest. "It's just... I like to have her near me."

Dr. Halloran smiled in understanding. "Okay," she said. "Well, I'll be back to check on you a little later. You still have hours before you're discharged, so if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to page me, okay?"

"Thank you," Meredith replied.

"It's my pleasure," Dr. Halloran said, gathering up the charts and putting her pen back in her pocket. She smiled at them, then turned around and left the room, the door closing behind her.

Derek glanced down at the Lilly, then looked to Meredith. "She'll probably be eating for another fifteen minutes. How about I run up to the attending lounge to take a quick shower, and I'll come back down and take her while you're getting cleaned up?" he suggested.

"Yeah, that's fine," Meredith yawned. "Oh, bring me food. I'm dying for a bagel. You know, those cinnamon raisin ones they sell at the coffee cart. And cream cheese. Lots of it. Orange juice too, please" she requested.

"Got it," Derek chuckled, kissing both Meredith and his daughter before getting up out of the bed. He slung the bag with his toiletries and clothes over his shoulder. "I'll be fast, I promise."

"Lots of cream cheese," Meredith repeated. "Go."

Derek grinned as he opened the door. "Alright."

Newly showered and changed, Derek returned to Meredith's room with their breakfast, her requested bagel and orange juice, and a coffee and bran muffin for himself. He set everything down on the tray table at Meredith's bedside, then leaned down to kiss her. "Hey," he said.

"Hey," Meredith returned. "Someone's awake."

Derek glanced down at his daughter, snuggled against Meredith's chest and staring at the two of them in fascination with her wide blue eyes. He smiled. "Hey, beautiful," he said softly. "Ready to start the day?"

Meredith laughed. "I think she is," she said. "Oh, I paged the nurses' station while you were gone. They said to take her into the nursery for her pictures before noon so they could have them back to us by the time we leave today."

"Okay."

"I thought we could do it now while she's awake," Meredith said. "You could take her while I shower."

"Do you need me to help you?" Derek asked, taking the baby so he could have a turn holding her.

"No, no. Go with Lilly. I'm fine," Meredith assured him. "If you could just get my clothes and my toothbrush and put them in the bathroom, that would be good."

Derek nodded, Lilly cradled in one arm while he gathered Meredith's things and set them down on the bathroom counter for her. "All set," he said. "How about it, Lilly? Wanna go have your photo shoot while Mommy takes a shower?"

"Oh, that little purple bow we packed. I want to put that in first," Meredith remembered, getting up out of the bed and walking over to the diaper bag full of Lilly's stuff they packed. She rummaged through the side compartment and pulled out the small bow.

"It looks a little wavier today," Derek said, pulling off the baby's pink cap.

"Definitely not the peach fuzz blonde I was born with," Meredith giggled as she combed her fingers through Lilly's hair. She smoothed it up into a small tuft on top of Lilly's head and clipped the tiny purple bow in place. "There we go. Very pretty."

"Gorgeous," Derek said.

"Okay, get some good pictures. Make sure her eyes are open. Make funny faces at her or whatever."

"I'll tap dance if I have to," Derek laughed. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. A fifteen minute shower sounds pretty damn good right now," Meredith said, kissing Lilly's cheek. "And once you get back, we'll give you a bath, too. Or a sponge bath. No tub baths until your umbilical cord falls off."

"Sounds good," Derek said, letting Lilly grab hold of his finger. "Alright, picture time."

Meredith smiled and watched as Derek left with their baby. Before the door shut behind them, she missed Lilly being in the same room with her, but made herself turn around and walk into the bathroom. She'd never wanted a shower more in her life, ready to rinse off the sweat and ick of yesterday. And the second the warm water hit her skin, she swore she could stand in there for days.

She was toweling her hair dry when the two of them came back, and she smiled. "How'd it go?"

"Good. She looked right at the camera. Didn't cry once," Derek said proudly. "I made sure the blanket wasn't covering up the SGH emblem. You wore a Seattle Grace onesie in your newborn pictures, too, so now you guys match."

"I didn't even think of that." Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. "Thank you."

"How was your shower? Feel better?" he asked.

"Much," she sighed, smoothing out her tee shirt over her belly that still had a small post-pregnancy bump. "As good as any orgasm." Derek cocked his head at her and she laughed. "I'm off sex for six weeks. A hot shower is all I've got for now."

"Fair enough," Derek chuckled. "Any idea when the next wave of visitors is coming in?"

Meredith glanced at the clock. "It's a little after ten. We probably have some time if you wanted to give her a bath."

"Yeah," he said. "Up for a bath, Lilly?"

The baby looked up at him with a curious expression and Meredith laughed. "It won't be that bad, I promise," she said, reaching for the baby. She kissed Lilly's nose before lying her down in the warming isolette to keep her comfortable while they bathed her.

Derek put some warm water into the pink plastic basin, then squirt a few drops of her lavender bath soap into it and swished it around with a damp cloth. "Okay, all set," he said.

Meredith unsnapped the baby's onesie and carefully pulled it over her head, then took off her tiny white socks. She peeled back the adhesive on the diaper and pulled down the front. "Someone pooped," she said, smiling at her daughter.

"She did?" Derek asked, peering into the diaper. "Wow, she did." He took Lilly's hand and tapped his palm against it. "High five, Lilly."

Meredith laughed as she grabbed a wipe from the pack. "We're very proud," she said. "Wanna hold her legs up?"

"Yeah." Derek gently took hold of Lilly's feet and lifted her bottom up while Meredith cleaned her up. Lilly fussed when the cold wipe touched her warm skin, and Meredith smiled. "I know. You don't like being cold. Almost finished."

"Her legs are really squirmy," Derek said, chuckling as Lilly wriggled them around while he held them. "I swear her ankles are as thick as my thumb is. You've got skinny little legs, Lilly."

"And a cute butt," Meredith added, patting her bottom dry with the blanket underneath her. She tossed the old diaper into the trash. "All done."

Derek smiled at his wife proudly. "For someone who can count the number of diapers she's changed on one hand, I'm impressed."

"I guess the mommy gene's just been hiding my whole life under that cloak of darkness," she joked. "Can you hand me the wash cloth?"

Derek wrung it out over the basin and handed it to her. "Why do you get to do it?"

Meredith laughed. "I'll do half, and you do half," she compromised, gently lifting Lilly's head off the towel. She rubbed the top of Lilly's head lightly with the cloth and the baby's dark hair matted together the same way Derek's did when it got wet. Lilly stared at Meredith with a puzzled expression, wondering what she was doing, and Meredith smiled. "Do you like bath time?" she asked.

"So far, so good," Derek said, wiping away a drip of water rolling down Lilly's forehead with his finger. "Mommy doesn't even give me baths," he said, making sure Meredith caught the amused expression on his face.

"Because if I did, bath time would turn into something else, and that something else would result in another baby," Meredith smirked. "Only one Lilly for now." She carefully laid Lilly's head down on the towel again and handed Derek the cloth. She dipped her fingers in the basin and rubbed them over Lilly's cheeks and forehead like the books advised, to avoid irritating the more sensitive skin of her face.

Lilly wriggled around on the towel, bending and kicking her legs, and Derek laughed. "Are you doing your workout? Must be nice having room to stretch your legs. There wasn't much room in Mommy's belly to do that, huh?"

"No, but she tried. My ribs were just in the way," Meredith giggled, taking the cloth from Derek and dipping it back in the warm water. She squeezed out the excess and wiped Lilly's neck, working her way down the baby's underarms, arms, elbows, and torso. When she was satisfied that Lilly's upper half was clean, she handed Derek the cloth like she promised. "Your turn."

"Thank you," Derek said, stepping into the space in front of Lilly while Meredith rummaged through the baby's bag for the outfit they planned to take her home in. He dipped and wrung out the soft cloth again and cleaned Lilly's lower half. Lilly let out a tiny sneeze and Derek smiled. "Are you cold? Almost done, I promise."

"Make sure you get in between her toes," Meredith reminded him as she found the outfit she packed, a purple sundress with a white sweater. "Do you think she needs pants? I know it's warm outside, but I don't want her to be cold."

"Well, we can always wrap her in the blanket my mom gave us that you packed," Derek said, slipping a fresh diaper under Lilly's bottom, powdering her, and fastening it around her waist. He leaned down and kissed her rounded belly. "Mommy was never a worrier until we found out you existed," he said playfully, loud enough so that Meredith could hear.

She laughed. "That's not true. When you were home with the flu last year, who called you every three hours and came home with medicine and chicken noodle soup?" she challenged him, walking back over to where Derek stood. "That's right. I did."

"Fine, I take it back," he chuckled. "You love us both equally."

"Yes, I do."

Derek held Lilly up and Meredith easily slipped the dress over her head. They weaved her arms through the outfit, and pulled it down over her belly. After putting her arms through the sleeves of the sweater, Meredith adjusted the frill of the dress and smiled. "You look very pretty in purple," she said to her daughter while Derek slipped on her tiny white socks.

"Hey, can I come in?" Mark asked, poking his head in the room.

"Hey," Derek said, picking up Lilly from the isolette. "Yeah, come on in."

Mark entered holding five, shiny pink balloons and a basket of fruit and chocolates. He set his gifts down on the bed and looked at Lilly, who was contentedly looking around the room while Derek held her. "Good Lord, she is beautiful," he said in awe. He smiled widely, and though he'd deny it, a slight sheen of tears pooled in his eyes. "Can I..."

"Yeah, of course," Derek nodded, passing Lilly over to him.

Lilly looked up at him in curiosity, pursing her tiny lips in thought. Mark smiled down at her. "Hey, Lilly. I'm your Uncle Mark. I know you don't know me yet, but you will. Your dad and I are best friends. I tried to pick up your mom two or three times, but that's water under the bridge now," he said.

Derek sighed in amusement, wrapping his arm around Meredith's shoulder. She leaned into him and kissed his neck, watching as Mark and Lilly interacted.

"You know, those two tried for months to have you. Seriously, they'd hog on-call rooms for hours. And hours. I had to sleep on a gurney in the hall once because they were busy getting it on in there," Mark shared with the baby.

"Of all the things you could tell our daughter, you tell her that," Meredith smirked.

"We're bonding," Mark defended, letting Lilly grab hold of his finger. "You're lucky to have them though, Lilly. No better parents out there," he said.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you, Mark."

"I can't tell who she looks like more," Mark said, looking from Lilly to Derek to Meredith then Lilly again. "I mean, the hair is clearly yours, Shep. And her chin. But the nose and lips are all Grey. Her eyes... that's a tossup." He smiled at the two of them. "She's gorgeous. Congrats." He gave them each a one handed hug, careful not to squish Lilly between them.

"Thank you, Mark," Derek said, patting his friend on the back.

Someone knocked on the door, and Meredith smiled. "Come in," she called.

Callie walked into the room, followed by Arizona, and Callie waved. "Thought we'd stop by before we have to get to surgery," Callie said, looking over Mark's shoulder to see Lilly. "Wow, you two make cute kids," she said. "Can I hold her?"

"Ask Mark," Derek joked.

Mark held Lilly closer to his chest and turned away. "You can in a minute. It's still my turn."

"How was labor?" Arizona asked. "You look great, by the way. And Lilly is beautiful."

"Oh, thank you," Meredith replied. "Uh, it wasn't that bad. I mean, it's not something I want to do every day, but I'd do it all over again," she said, smiling over at Lilly in her little purple dress.

"It couldn't have been _that_ bad," Mark agreed. "I mean, she's pretty damn tiny. And she weighs next to nothing..."

"Believe me, she didn't feel so tiny coming out. I'm still kinda shocked I'm able to walk today," Meredith laughed.

"It was the most incredible thing I've ever seen," Derek said, letting out a breath and shaking his head. "Meredith was perfect. She only pushed a few times, and didn't even yell at me. She was calmer than I was."

Mark finally passed the baby over to Callie, then looked at Meredith. "You didn't yell at him? Wow. That's... I'm impressed."

"No, Derek was a good labor coach. I couldn't have done it without him there," Meredith said, snaking her arm around her husband's waist. "We even changed our first dirty diaper before you got here."

"Look at you two," Arizona said with a smile. "Not even a day old, and you're pros."

"Well, she's a pretty easy baby so far. We're lucky," Derek said. "Who knows what kind of surprises she'll have for us when we get home..."

"You're leaving already? Damn. You come in, push the kid out, and they send you on your way," Callie said.

Meredith laughed. "Not for a few hours, but yeah, we're leaving today. Which is fine. I'd rather be home anyway," she shrugged. "Oh, Mark, how's Charlie?"

"Total cock block. He slept in the bed with me and Bridget last night," Mark said. "I'm surprised you two were able to have sex to make a baby."

"Yeah, he does that a lot," Meredith replied, finally biting into her cream cheese-covered bagel she'd been craving since she went into labor. "That's why we bought him a dog bed."

"I'm on-call tonight, but I'll drop him off tomorrow afternoon... give you guys some time to settle in with the baby," Mark offered. "Torres, you're hogging her."

Callie ran her finger over Lilly's cheek and smiled. "I don't care. She's awesome. I'm so happy for you guys," she said. "You wanna hold her?" she asked Arizona.

"Yeah." Arizona accepted the baby, nodding in approval. "Yep, definitely the cutest baby I've ever seen... which is a very big compliment, considering I work with babies on a daily basis. I mean, they're all cute and squishy, but she... yeah, she wins."

There was another knock at the door and Bailey stepped tentatively into the room, her smile fading when she saw the room full of people. "Aren't your names on the board for a surgery happening in ten minutes?" she asked.

"That baby's better than any surgery," Mark said.

Bailey walked over to Arizona and peered at Lilly, who seemed pretty bored by all of the attention, her eyelashes fanning over her cheeks whenever she sleepily shut her eyes. Bailey's smile returned. "Would you look at that child," she said softly. "She is beautiful."

"Thank you, Dr. Bailey," Meredith smiled.

Arizona passed the baby over to her, and Bailey easily held the baby to her chest, unable to tear her eyes away. "So you two really got married and had a baby. If you would've told me that a few years ago, I never would've believed it."

"Us either," Derek said, taking a sip of his coffee. "Any time you wanna apologize for the hell you put us through..." he said playfully.

Bailey glared at him. "Very funny," she said, running her finger over Lilly's cheek. "I heard your water broke in the hallway."

"Does everyone know that?" Meredith asked with wide eyes.

"Of course," Bailey laughed. "How was labor?"

"Worse than pushing. Pushing was the easy part," Meredith said. "Weird, and slightly mortifying, but short."

"She did great. I couldn't believe how fast it went. Before I knew it, I was cutting the cord. She was..." Derek searched for a word that felt accurate, but couldn't come up with one expressing how proud of her he was. "God, she was perfect. They both are."

Meredith leaned into him and he kissed the top of her head. Bailey watched them, and couldn't help but smile. "Spoken like a true father," she said. "I see she got your hair, Shepherd."

"Big surprise," Mark joked, rummaging through the gift basket he got for them. He pulled out a banana and took a bite, dropping down onto the couch.

"Is that my gift you're eating?" Derek chuckled.

"What? I didn't get a chance to eat breakfast," Mark shrugged with a mouthful of the banana. "I'll save you all the chocolate."

"Damn. Surgery's about to start," Callie said as her pager went off. "We have to go. Congratulations. We're so happy for you guys."

"Thank you," Derek nodded.

Mark reluctantly followed Arizona and Callie out of the room and looked back briefly. "Coolest baby ever," he praised, giving them a thumbs up.

"Does that mean you'll babysit?" Meredith asked.

"Like you'll ever leave her at home for a night out," Mark joked. "Just say the word, and I'm there."

Bailey gently handed the baby to Meredith and patted her arm. "Congratulations. She's gorgeous."

"Thank you," Meredith said. Lilly looked up at her when she spoke, and curled into Meredith, clutching onto her shirt with her tiny fist.

"Enjoy the time off. And I better not see you back here tomorrow, either of you," Bailey said.

Derek shook his head. "Believe me, we're gonna enjoy the leave. I actually plan on bribing the Chief for more," he teased.

"Worth a shot," Bailey replied, making sure the other three left before she did. "I'll see you later."

"Bye," Meredith waved as she sat down on the bed. She leaned against the pillows and smiled at the baby. "I think social hour wore her out. She can barely keep her eyes open."

"Are you tired, princess?" Derek asked, sitting on the bed next to Meredith.

Meredith reached for the pink chenille blanket Derek's mom got them, and wrapped it around Lilly. "There. Warm, clean, and ready for a nap."

"Good." He kissed her temple. "Lexie and your dad should be here soon. I told them any time around noon would be fine."

"Okay," Meredith replied.

"Are you nervous about seeing him?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "He's my dad. And Lilly's grandpa. I want her to know him." She hugged Lilly snugly to her chest. "Especially because my mom isn't here."

"I'm sorry, Mer."

"It's okay. She's still a part of Lilly's life, and so is your dad. Just because they're not here doesn't change that," Meredith said.

Derek smiled and rubbed her thigh with his hand. "Yeah."

"Are you feeling me up?" she asked.

"Maybe," he murmured as he leaned in and kissed her.

Meredith moaned against his lips. Going six weeks without sex would not be easy with the post-pregnancy hormones. When they pulled back, she saw Lilly looking up at them, her little forehead wrinkled in confusion. "Uh oh. Caught in the act."

"Maybe she doesn't like it when we kiss," Derek said. "I kiss Mommy a lot. Actually, that's part of the reason why you're here."

"Derek."

"What? It's the truth," he laughed.

She stroked Lilly's cheek with her finger to soothe her back to sleep. "We made a very pretty baby," she whispered.

Lilly yawned widely and turned her head toward Meredith, pressing her nose into the fabric of Meredith's shirt. She blinked sleepily a few times before her eyelids fell shut. "She's already so attached to you, Mer," Derek said in a hushed voice so the baby wouldn't wake up.

"She's attached to you, too," Meredith said. "I just have the boobs to feed her with."

"When Dr. Halloran put her on your chest after you delivered her, she grabbed right onto you. I couldn't believe it," Derek said. "I get goose bumps just thinking about seeing that."

Meredith smiled at him. "She held your finger during her checkup. She knows you'll keep her safe. You're her dad."

"I always want her to feel that way," Derek said, kissing the top of Lilly's head and breathing her in. "I love you, Lillybug."

There was a soft knock at the door and Lexie opened it just a crack. "Hey," she said. "Mind if we come in?"

"No, not at all," Meredith replied as she waved them into the room.

Lexie stepped into the room with Thatcher following behind her, holding a bundle of balloons and a plush lamb with a pink bow. They both smiled when they saw Meredith holding the sleeping baby, and quietly walked over to her bedside to catch a glimpse. "Oh my God," Lexie gushed. "She's beautiful."

"She looks just like you did, Meredith," Thatcher said, wiping away the tears in his eyes with a handkerchief he pulled from his pocket. "Everything but her hair, anyway."

"With a hat on, she's all Meredith," Derek said.

"Eyes?" Lexie asked.

Meredith smiled. "Both," she said. "Blue, but there's a little green in there, too."

"Wanna hold her?" Derek asked.

Lexie's eyes widened. "Can I?"

"Of course," Meredith laughed. "We want you both to hold her."

"You go first," Lexie said to Thatcher, stepping aside. "She's your granddaughter."

"Oh. Okay," Thatcher said, setting their gifts down on the tray table. He held his arms out and Meredith delicately handed Lilly over to him, careful not to jostle her while she slept. Once she was in his arms, he smiled, the kind of smile Meredith had never seen on his face before. Probably the smile he had when she was born. "Hi, there," he whispered. "My goodness, you are beautiful."

Lilly opened her eyes and yawned, looking up at Thatcher when she heard a voice. "Oops, didn't mean to wake you," he chuckled.

"She's a light sleeper like Derek. When we got up for work in the mornings when I was pregnant, she'd wake up, too, and give me a good morning stretch," Meredith giggled.

"She's so tiny," Lexie said with a smile, rubbing the back of Lilly's hand with her finger. "Only six pounds?"

"Six pounds, seven ounces. Eighteen inches," Derek said. "Tiny girl."

"Yes, you are," Thatcher practically beamed as he held Lilly, bouncing slightly on his heels. "She's small like you were. You were smaller than this, actually. You came out screaming though. Had a healthy set of lungs on you. God, you were..." he paused. "I couldn't believe how perfect. Just like her."

Meredith chewed on her lip and felt her eyes burn. "Thank you," she whispered.

"I heard you did awesome. I'm so sorry I didn't come last night. Surgery went until three in the morning, and I didn't think you'd be up for visitors then," Lexie joked. "So, how was it? Is it as horrible as they say it is?"

"Uh... yeah. By the time I was pushing, the pain meds. wore off, so I felt, you know, everything. But it didn't even matter once I saw her," Meredith said. "She's amazing."

"We all heard her crying in the hallway. I cried, too," Lexie admitted. She glanced over at Lilly and smiled at her. "And now I finally get to meet you. I'm Lexie, by the way. Well, Aunt Lexie."

"Do you want to...?" Thatcher offered, nodding his head down at Lilly.

"Yeah," Lexie said. Thatcher handed her the baby and she cuddled Lilly close to her, involuntarily blinking back the tears she felt. "Okay, wow. Didn't expect to cry. But she's just so... you two. It's crazy. Did you send your family any pictures, Derek? I bet they're all freaking out."

"Four sisters, right?" Thatcher asked.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, mom and four very girly sisters. Having kids is like a hobby in my family. And when the only son adds a grandkid to the mix, it's..."

"Chaos?" Thatcher guessed.

"Oh, yeah. Phone calls, texts, emails. They're probably having a party without us," Derek said playfully, though in truth, he wouldn't put it past them to actually do that. "My mom already booked her flight out here a few weeks from now. I don't think I've ever heard her sound so happy."

"We're glad you could come," Meredith said to her father. "I know that my mom kept us... I'd just... I'd really like you to be a part of her life."

"I'd like that," Thatcher said softly, a smile pulling at his lips.

Meredith reached out her arms and he took it as his cue to hug her, stepping into her embrace and wrapping his arms around her. She splayed her hands over his back, her chin on his shoulder, and hugged him back, the kind of hug she wish she could have gotten all her life from him. But it didn't matter now, because when she saw her daughter in Lexie's arms, she knew that he would be there for Lilly. That alone made up for the rest of it.

"I'm so proud of you, Meredith," Thatcher said.

Meredith swallowed thickly and squeezed him to her tightly before she finally let go. "Thank you."

"I got her this. You had one just like it when you were little." Thatcher picked up the plush lamb and handed it to Meredith. "Even had the pink bow on its head like yours did. You loved that thing, carried it everywhere. That and your Lilly doll. I know you have the doll, but the lamb-Kiki, that's what you named it-I think you lost it at the playground when you were five or so. Anyway, I saw this at the store, and wanted to get it for Lilly."

"I forgot all about that lamb," Meredith said, running a hand through her hair. "I can't believe you remember that."

"Oh, I could go on for hours. I have hundreds of stories," Thatcher said.

"I'd love to hear all of them sometime," Derek replied, always fascinated by the little nuggets of Meredith that didn't know about.

Meredith smirked at him. "I'm sure you would."

"Potty training, preschool boyfriends, all that. Any time you're free," Derek grinned.

"Keep in mind that I have blackmail pictures and stories about you, too," Meredith reminded him playfully as Lexie handed the baby back to her. "Thank you for getting that for her. I'm sure she'll love hers as much as I did," she said. Lilly started rooting around Meredith's chest with her mouth and looked up at her in expectation. "Hungry, peanut?"

"We'll get going," Lexie said. "I actually have to get my patient down to pre-op anyway."

"I need to get to Molly's. Laura and I are having a lunch date in the park," Thatcher said, smiling. "She was so excited when we told her Lilly was here. She even drew pictures for her."

Meredith let Lilly grab onto her finger and kissed her hand. "Tell them to stop by sometime this week. Laura is the only west coast cousin Lilly has," she said.

"I'll pass the message along when I see them today," Thatcher agreed.

"Congratulations. We're so happy for you guys," Lexie said, leaning over the bed and hugging both of them before stroking Lilly's cheek with her finger. "I know we only met ten minutes ago, but I'm already kind of obsessed with you," she laughed.

Thatcher reached out and shook Derek's hand then wrapped his arm around Meredith gently because of the baby between them. "She's beautiful. I couldn't be more thrilled for the both of you."

"Thank you," Meredith said softly.

After they left the room, Meredith swapped Lilly over to Derek so she could lift up her shirt to nurse. "Just a minute, sweetie," she said, opening the front of her nursing bra.

Lilly impatiently pressed her face into Derek's chest and he looked down at her in amusement. "Mommy has the boobs; not me," he laughed. He kissed her forehead then handed her back to Meredith. "Enjoy those, Lilly. I probably won't get to touch them for weeks."

Meredith laughed. "At least you'll get to see them. My boobs will be out twenty-four-seven," she said. Lilly latched on with hardly any help, and securely rested her little hand on Meredith's breast.

"Look at that," Derek all but beamed, taking a blanket out of her bassinet and draping it over Meredith's opposite shoulder so she and Lilly could have their privacy if anyone walked in. "Not even a day old, and she's got the nursing thing down." He put his arm around Meredith's shoulder and kissed her temple. "Your dad is really happy."

"I've never seen him like that before. It used to be so awkward even being near him. Now it's like... he's just my dad, you know? Like he's been there my whole life. I mean, he hasn't, but he's here now, and I want him here. I want him to be a part of Lilly's life," she said, looking down at Lilly as she nursed. "She deserves that."

"Yeah, she does," he said. "And she seems to like him. Actually, she seems to like everybody. She hasn't cried when anyone held her."

"She's a good baby," Meredith said, smoothing her fingers through Lilly's hair.

"Calm, happy, good eater, good pooper. I'd say we got pretty lucky, huh?"

Meredith smiled down at their daughter. "Yes, we did."

"So... Kiki, huh?" he smirked at her.

"Shut up. I was two."

...

They were packed up and ready to go home, just waiting on their discharge papers, which were delayed as usual. Derek walked back and forth with Lilly propped up over his shoulder, who was looking around contentedly.

Meredith slipped Lilly's newborn pictures into her bag, careful not to crease them. She glanced at the clock on the wall. "Did they forget about us?" she asked, laughing. "Seriously, I'd like to get home before sundown."

"It's only... four," Derek said as he looked at his watch. "Hey, you're officially one day old," he told Lilly, turning his head and kissing her cheek.

"Best twenty-four hours ever," Meredith said. She stood up from the couch and walked over to the baby resting her head on Derek's shoulder. She kissed Lilly's nose. "I love you."

When there was a knock at the door, Meredith turned around, expecting to be met with a nurse thrusting a pile of paperwork at her. "May I come in?" came the voice of the Chief on the other side.

Meredith quickly opened the door. "Hi. Yeah, come in," she said.

"I'm glad you're still here. I thought you might be discharged by now," Richard said, setting down a flower arrangement on the table. "I'm so sorry I didn't get a chance to come by yesterday. Board meetings all day, you know how it is. I've been dying to come by."

"Would you like to hold her?" Derek asked.

"Of course I would. Do you mind?"

Meredith shook her head. "No, we want you to."

Derek handed Lilly over, her tiny body fitting snugly into Richard's arms. He smiled down at her. "She's beautiful."

"Thank you," Derek grinned.

"She looks just like you did, Meredith," the Chief said. "You were a gorgeous baby. You know, I held you when you were just a few hours old. Feels like yesterday. Now I'm holding your own child."

Meredith leaned into Derek and smiled. "Yeah."

"Now that I look at her, I definitely see some of you in her, Derek," Richard pointed out. "Look at all that hair. That's certainly not the hair you were born with, Meredith."

"Yeah, we both figured she'd get that from Derek. At least, I hoped so," Meredith laughed.

"How are you feeling?"

"I feel really good," Meredith said. "I don't know how my mother would feel about the fact that I caved and got an epidural, but..."

Richard took his eyes off of Lilly and pursed his lips. "She'll haunt me for saying this... but she had an epidural, too."

"What?" Meredith blinked. "She did?"

"Yes, she did. She was in labor with you for twenty-six hours. You were little, but you took your time being born. But once you were here, she didn't let you go. One of the few times I saw the soft side of Ellis Grey," he recalled, a sad smile on his face.

Lilly stretched her hand out of the blanket and waved her fingers at him as she unclenched her fist. "I don't think I'll still be working here once you start your internship one day, but I'll make sure there's a spot open for you. You're the daughter of a Grey and a Shepherd. Every hospital will want you, but we're the best, Lilly."

"Think she's a neurosurgeon in the making?" Derek asked, his arm wrapped around Meredith.

"Maybe a general surgeon. You never know," Richard joked. He smiled down at the baby. "Whipples are much more fun than craniotomies. That's what your grandmother would say, too. I'll make sure you know all about her."

"We want Lilly to know about her. And you knew the real her. The good and the bad. We'd like it if you could maybe share that with Lilly," Meredith said.

"Of course," Richard nodded. "That's... of course I would."

"Thank you."

A nurse knocked twice before entering the room, holding a few sheets of paper and a pen. "Discharge papers," she said. "All you have to do is sign, and you're free to go."

Meredith accepted the papers and pen, and quickly scribbled her signature on the forms, releasing both herself and Lilly from the hospital stay. She clicked the pen shut, neatly stacked the forms, and handed them back to her. "There you go. All set."

"Great. We'll call in a few days to schedule a follow-up appointment for you and the baby. Until then though, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to call," the nurse said.

"Okay; thank you."

With a polite smile, she left the room with the signed papers. Richard handed Lilly to Meredith, taking their hospital freedom as his cue. "I'm sure you're anxious to get going. Just wanted to stop in. She's beautiful, just like I knew she'd be. Congratulations," he said.

Meredith reached out her free hand and hugged him, and he hugged her back. "Thank you."

"I'm glad you caught us before we left. It was good seeing you," Derek said as the two of them shook hands. "And I promise, you won't see us again until our leave is over."

"Good. I better not. Enjoy the time off," Richard said. He brushed his finger over Lilly's hand. "You're very lucky, Lilly."

"Thanks, Richard," Derek replied.

He opened the door and looked back at them. "I mean it, no surgeries. If I catch you sneaking around here, you're fired."

Meredith laughed. "You won't, we promise."

The door closed behind him, leaving just the three of them, bags packed and waiting. Derek smiled at his wife and daughter. "Ready to go home?"

Meredith smiled, Lilly cuddled close to her chest. "Yes, we are."


	106. Welcome Home

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, Meredith and Derek would be given decent screen time and a storyline that wasn't so insulting and frustrating. And it wouldn't be the Callie Hour of Endless Whining.**

**So, so sorry for the lack of updates lately. I suck. But I only have one day of college left, and will finally have more time to write. (Also, I turned 22 yesterday. Reviews are awesome gifts. Just saying.) ;)  
**

Derek pulled the car into the driveway of the house and cut the engine. The ride home had been peaceful, Lilly sleeping the whole way in the backseat, Meredith next to her. Despite the balloons bobbing him in the head from their place in the passenger seat the entire time, it was a successful trip, and now they were finally home, with Lilly on the outside now.

"Welcome home," Meredith said softly, stroking Lilly's cheek. She unbuckled the car seat and scooped the baby's tiny body from it. Lilly's eyes blinked open as she was pulled from her sleep. "I didn't mean to wake you up. But it's probably good that you're awake, because now you can get the full tour."

"I think you're supposed to keep her in the car seat, Mer," Derek laughed, his arms and hands full of all their gifts as well as their bags.

"That thing is so heavy. I'd rather just hold her," Meredith said. She scooted out of the car holding Lilly, then shut the door. The warm sun beat down all around them and Meredith shielded Lilly's eyes as they walked to the front door of the house. "Bright, sunny, and warm. Even for June in Seattle, this is pretty rare, Lilly."

Derek smiled, fumbling with his keys in his occupied hands before finding the right one. "That's because she's finally here. Mother Nature is in a good mood this weekend."

"Cheesy."

"Still true," Derek said, pushing open the door.

Meredith walked in and turned Lilly around so she could scope the place out. "This is where we live," she said. Lilly stared around the room, her blue eyes looking back and forth in curiosity.

"She's speechless," Derek joked. He set everything down in the foyer then joined Meredith and Lilly in the living room. "Okay, we've got the couch, coffee table, TV, your swing and bouncy seat, a few of Charlie's toys. Charlie is your big brother. You'll meet him sometime tomorrow. He'll probably try to lick your face, but don't worry, we'll protect you from the slobber."

"Right through there is the kitchen. Then there's the office, and your playroom," Meredith said. "We designed this house ourselves, and even though you didn't exist back when we built it, we were already thinking about you."

"Upstairs, you have a nursery, and a bedroom for when you're older. There's actually two extra bedrooms up there, and because you're the firstborn, you get first dibs," Derek said. "Wanna show her?"

"She's very into all of this," Meredith teased, smiling when Lilly blinked up at her, the baby's hand holding onto her finger.

Derek laughed as they headed for the stairs. "It's a big adjustment. Yesterday, she lived inside you. And now she has a whole house. Fun fact about the house, Lilly. You were actually conceived in it. We're pretty sure," he said, following Meredith down the hall toward the nursery.

Meredith glanced back at him and smirked. "Derek."

"What? It's true."

They walked into Lilly's nursery, pink walls and white furniture, clothes, stuffed animals, and pictures, the room they designed just for their daughter. "Your paint color is called Sexy Pink. We knew you were a girl, so we didn't do any of that gender neutral stuff."

"Let's just hope that next time we have a baby, you have a little sister so I don't have to paint this room again," Derek joked.

"Notice how silly your dad is, already talking about a future sibling even though I pushed you out of me just yesterday," Meredith said in a cooing voice, leaning down and kissing the top of Lilly's head. "Yeah, he's a funny man."

"Hmm, what can I say? We made a very pretty baby." Derek picked up one of their framed sonogram photos off the shelf and showed Lilly. "When we first found out about you, we called you Blueberry. Even then, when you were just a little blobby baby with a heartbeat, you were beautiful."

"And now you're here," Meredith said. "And you're even prettier in person. We might be pumping up your ego by saying that so much, but it's the truth, so I don't care."

Derek ran a hand through his hair and laughed. "Parenthood made us corny."

"You were always corny," she pointed out. "Apparently being married to you, getting pregnant, and giving birth made me that way, too."

"Not so dark and twisty," Derek said, putting his hand on the small of her back as they walked out of the nursery.

"Not so much." Meredith leaned into him and kissed him, Lilly in between. "Wanna go eat? Breastfeeding makes me hungry."

"Yeah, come on. I'll make something," Derek said. He smiled at Lilly. "Now's as good a time as any to show off my cooking skills to you."

"Yes, he's very skilled in the kitchen," Meredith joked, carefully walking down the stairs holding the baby. "And clearly, another room in the house where we probably made you."

Derek grinned. "Now you're pumping up my ego. Thanks for that," he said. "I'll bring her swing into the kitchen so we can eat."

"Okay," Meredith said as she went into the kitchen. She stopped in her tracks when she saw the mountain of Tupperware containers lining the countertop. "Wow. Okay, well, Izzie was obviously here..."

Derek followed in behind her with the pink and yellow baby swing and set it down. "Izzie was here, huh?"

"I think so," Meredith laughed, scanning the baked goods. "Muffins, cookies, raisin bread, cupcakes. We need to have babies more often."

"Usually a care package is a meatloaf. We struck the motherload," Derek said, unbuckling the cloth seatbelt on Lilly's swing.

"Yes, we did." Meredith gently put Lilly in the swing, making sure she was propped up and her head and neck were supported. Lilly stared back at her with an unsure expression on her face and they both laughed.

"Don't be scared. It's fun. I wish they made these in adult size," Derek said, kneeling down next to Meredith. He kissed her forehead then buckled her in. "There we go."

Meredith turned the dial for the mobile and the little bumblebees and butterflies started rotating in a circle. Lilly's eyes were immediately drawn to them and she looked up. "I think she likes it," Meredith nodded in satisfaction. "Should we turn the swing on?"

"Yeah, maybe just on low. She's been so used to living inside you for nine months that movement comforts her," Derek said, recalling something he'd read. He turned the swing to the lowest speed setting, and it began rocking gently from side to side. "Is that fun, princess?"

"We could probably fit two of her in there. Think we should put pillows around her?" Meredith fretted as she fixed the front of Lilly's dress.

"Nah, she's fine. She's not gonna be doing any gymnast moves," Derek said. He slid the swing closer to the counter so they could keep a close eye on her, then walked over to the fridge. "Alright, well, we have an entire restaurant's worth of food here," he chuckled. "Any requests?"

"What do we have?" Meredith asked as she hopped up onto the stool. She winced when her butt hit the wooden chair. "Ouch."

"You okay?"

Meredith nodded, reaching for a piece of raisin bread from the plastic container. "Yeah, just sore. I'm fine. It could be worse. I could have stitches," she said. She smiled over at Lilly next to her. "You're a little peanut, but those shoulders? Holy crap..."

"Yeah, your nails dug pretty deep into my palm during that part... not that I'm complaining. I'll take that over giving birth any day," Derek said.

"Was that a compliment?" Meredith asked.

Derek laughed. "Are you kidding? There's no way I could have handled childbirth. I still can't believe how tough you were."

"Thank you."

Derek opened the freezer, and was met with more containers of food in Izzie's signature Tupperware containers, complete with labels. "Whoa, there's more," he said.

"Really? What's in there?" Meredith asked excitedly.

"Let's see. We've got... chicken cutlets. Green bean casserole. Some kind of stir fry. Lasagna," Derek said, examining the containers one by one.

Meredith shook her head in awe, impressed by her friend's culinary talent. "Seriously, I barely have time to make a sandwich most days. When does she have time to prepare, cook, package, and deliver a lasagna?" she joked.

"Beats me. But I'm glad she did," he said. "There's also hamburgers. Macaroni and cheese..."

"Ooh, that," Meredith interjected, taking another bite of her raisin bread. "Izzie makes the best macaroni and cheese. It's not the box kind. She actually boils pasta and melts cheese like a chef. She made it for me after I had my appendectomy, and I swear, I ate the whole pot."

"That good?" he asked, pulling it from the stack in the freezer.

"Yes." Meredith looked over at Lilly and gasped. "Derek, look. She's sucking her thumb."

Derek peered over the counter, his smile reaching his eyes when he saw Lilly with her tiny thumb in between her lips. "Since when do you suck your thumb? You're just full of surprises, huh?"

"She didn't do it at all in the hospital," Meredith said. "She hasn't done that since we got that sonogram picture." She smiled at the baby. "You are so cute. Derek, take a picture."

Derek pulled his phone from his pocket and snapped a photo of Lilly and her thumb sucking. "This is adorable. You're going to be the only background, wallpaper, and screensaver I ever have," he grinned.

"Which reminds me, we need to start emailing baby pictures to people. Especially your mom. And we'll mail her one of Lilly's newborn pictures, too," Meredith said.

"Yeah, we will," Derek nodded, taking the lid off the macaroni and cheese and putting it into the microwave to defrost. "Hey, didn't you suck your thumb?"

"Yeah, I did. Until I was six, actually."

Derek set two spoons on the counter and slid one over to her. "She's just like you."

"As long as she doesn't inherit my penchant for sleeping with inappropriate men and chugging tequila on porches during parties, I think I'd be okay with that," Meredith laughed, her heart thudding a little faster in her chest when she looked at their baby, who was still contentedly watching her mobile spin.

"Am I one of those inappropriate men?" Derek asked.

"We had sex in public and got caught. So, yeah, you kind of were. Plus, you were my boss," Meredith said.

Derek smirked. "Technically, I still am your boss."

"We have a kid together. Kid trumps employee rank," Meredith said, smiling. "Right, Lilly?" Lilly yawned and closed her eyes. "She agrees with me."

...

The sun was slowly setting, with daylight lasting longer and longer as summer approached, and despite the few streaks of orange sunlight that shone through the windows, it was approaching bedtime. For Lilly, anyway. After both Meredith and Derek showered, thinking ahead and going through as much of their nighttime routine as they could, considering Lilly would be up on and off all night, it was her turn to get cleaned up.

Derek filled the pink plastic basin they'd snagged from the hospital with warm soapy water from the bathroom sink, slung a soft bath towel over his shoulder, and grabbed a wash cloth from the shelf. He carried it all back into Lilly's nursery where Meredith was stacking a cushy layer of towels on top of the baby's changing table, Lilly cradled in her left arm.

"Ready?" Derek asked as he set down the water basin.

Meredith handed Lilly over to him and smiled. "Yeah. I just want to get her clothes ready before we start," she said, walking over to Lilly's dresser. "Can you undress her?"

"Sure." Derek laid Lilly down on the changing table and pulled off her socks, followed by her dress, and finally her diaper. He tossed her old clothes into the hamper. "Should I put her diaper in here?" he asked, gesturing to the fancy disposal system they'd received from Izzie and Alex at their baby shower.

"In that genie thing? Yeah, that's fine," Meredith shrugged.

Derek did so, then picked Lilly up and held her to his chest to keep her warm while he waited for Meredith to find pajamas for her. Lilly rested her head by his neck and he kissed the top of her dark, fuzzy head.

Meredith set a fresh diaper, yellow footie pants and a matching pajama shirt down on the dresser. "Okay, all set."

"Okay." Just as Derek was about to lie Lilly down on the changing table, he felt something warm and wet running down the front of his tee shirt. "Why am I wet?" he asked.

Meredith put the pieces together before Derek did, and she smiled, dropping the wash cloth into the basin so she could take the baby from him. "She peed on you," Meredith said, laughing.

"She did?" Derek asked. He looked down at his shirt and started laughing, too. "You were only naked for thirty seconds. Were you cold, princess?"

"Be glad she didn't poop on you. Right, Lilly?" Meredith said playfully, gently laying her on the changing table. "Go change your shirt."

"Alright, I'll be right back," Derek said, tickling the bottom of Lilly's foot as he walked out the door. "I told you that just because we weren't having a boy that we'd still get peed on..."

Meredith leaned down and kissed her. "Thanks for peeing on Daddy. I mean, you're welcome to pee on me, too. I wouldn't mind. But, yeah. That was awesome," she said, patting the wet wash cloth over Lilly's hair. Lilly wriggled on the towel, and her forehead scrunched as the water hit her skin. She let out a cry of protest. Being naked and wet was clearly of no interest to her. "It's okay. Don't cry, Lillybug. It won't take long."

Derek reentered the room with a new shirt on, and frowned when he heard the baby crying. "You're okay. We just want to get you all cleaned up before bedtime," he said softly, rubbing Lilly's leg with his fingers. Her crying escalated when Meredith started washing her arms and chest, her eyes squeezing shut as she moved all of her tiny limbs.

"You're gonna make me cry with that sound," Meredith said, cleaning Lilly off as quickly as she could so bath time would be over. When the crying turned constant, and started being accompanied by hiccups, Meredith dropped the cloth into the basin. "I can't do it. I have to pick her up," she said, wiping away her own tears with the back of her hand, then scooping a wet, clean-from-the-waist-up Lilly into her arms.

"Are you crying?" Derek asked gently, aware that her hormones were on overdrive, and would be for some time.

"She's been inside me for the past nine months. Seeing her upset physically hurts me," Meredith defended, holding Lilly to her chest, her own shirt now soaked through with water. "It's just stupid hormones. I can't help it."

Derek smiled. "Don't apologize. I understand," he said. "How about you hold her while I do the rest?" He handed her a soft terrycloth towel and helped her wrap it around Lilly's body. He bathed her lower half without objection from Lilly, who settled down in the comfort of Meredith's arms and started sucking her thumb again. Once he had finally made his way down to her miniature toes and washed them, he dropped the cloth back into the basin. "All done."

"Thank you," Meredith said, leaning in to kiss him.

"Wanna dress her in our room?" he asked. "I'll clean up, then meet you in there."

Meredith folded a corner of the towel over Lilly's wet head and smiled. "Okay," she said. "Can you bring her clothes in?"

"Yeah."

She walked into their bedroom and sat down on the king-sized bed. After spending so many hours on a hospital bed with Derek that was half the size, as well as half the comfort, being on her own bed again was nothing short of glorious. Meredith leaned back against the padded headboard, Lilly cradled to her chest. "Mommy is tired," she said. She glanced over at the digital clock on her nightstand. "7:54. It's not even 8:00 or dark outside, and I could fall asleep. Mommy is also pathetic. Are you sleepy?"

Lilly looked up at her, a content expression on her tiny face. Meredith hugged her closer. "Yeah, you look tired. I'll feed you, then you can sleep, okay?"

Derek came into the bedroom with Lilly's diaper, clothes and her bottle of lotion. "Everything's cleaned up in her room. Maybe next time, she won't mind it so much," he laughed, dropping down next to Meredith on the bed. "God, I've missed this bed. We were only gone one night, but still. That bed at the hospital sucked."

"Right? We should have just curled up on that icky peach couch together. Probably would have been more lumbar support," Meredith giggled, laying Lilly between both of them so they could get her dressed. She unwrapped her from the towel and squirt some of the lavender baby lotion into her palms.

She rubbed her hands together, then lathered Lilly's skin in it, from her neck to her toes. "There we go. All moisturized. We don't want your skin getting dried out," Meredith said, rubbing Lilly's feet with the lotion then kissing the soles of them.

Derek watched as she interacted with the baby, completely comfortable and happy and mommy-ish, not the bar-hopping, boy-hopping person she was when he met her. He loved that free-spirited, adorably freaky girl. But this Meredith, the one who kissed her daughter's little feet and couldn't bear to see her cry, he was pretty sure she amazed him even more.

"Do you think she'll poop again tonight?" Meredith asked.

"Well, she already emptied her bladder out all over my shirt, so we're good in that department," Derek laughed, sliding the diaper under Lilly's bottom.

"She hasn't pooped since this morning. I just don't want her getting backed up," Meredith said. "A constipated newborn would be bad news."

"You're cute when you're worried," Derek said before kissing her. "She'll poop. Her plumbing works. We don't have to send her to the repair shop."

They fastened the adhesive to the diaper front, and Meredith smiled at him. "Okay."

Lilly yawned widely, stretching her arms over her head and extending her legs toward them, then she let out a little sigh. Derek grabbed her yellow footie pajama bottoms and pulled them up her legs and around her waist. "She's sleeping with us, right," he asked.

Meredith nodded, slipping the yellow shirt over the baby's head. "Yeah. We have that safe sleeper thingy. We just put that between us, and Lilly sleeps on it," she said, putting Lilly's arms through the sleeves and tugging the shirt over her belly. "I don't want to put her in the bassinet just yet. I read that a lot of open space can overwhelm her."

"I want her with us, too," Derek said. He picked Lilly up off the bed and kissed her forehead. "Mommy snores a little, but you get used to it."

"You haven't used earplugs in years, so it can't be that bad," Meredith said, inching closer to him on the bed. "He exaggerates. Don't listen to him, Lilly."

Lilly took Derek's finger in her small hand when he offered it, and looked up at both of them. "Can you believe they just handed her to us and let us go?" Meredith said. "That she's actually ours?"

Derek smiled. "I know."

"This still doesn't feel real." Meredith leaned down and kissed Lilly's nose, then kissed Derek. "You know what's weird?"

"What's weird?"

"We started trying for a baby on Lilly's due date. It was May 29th of last year," Meredith remembered. "I didn't even think of that until now."

Derek looked over at her. "Did we really?"

"Yeah. I remember I went wedding dress shopping with Izzie, her mom, and Cristina. I was horny the whole day because I was ovulating. And when I got home, we tried for the first time." She laughed. "I think we had sex four times that night. Maybe more. My head got kinda cloudy after all the orgasms."

"Hmm, one year and one week later, and she was born," Derek said.

Meredith rested her head on Derek's shoulder. "We tried very hard for you, peanut. It was fun trying, though."

"We even scheduled a few surgeries around trying," Derek chuckled, Lilly looking at him as though she was invested in the conversation. "Surgery, twenty minute on-call room break, then another surgery."

"Paid off," Meredith said. She wrapped her arm around Derek's torso and hugged him. "I love you."

"I love you, too," he said softly. "Do you want to nurse her? She looks like she's ready to fall asleep."

"Yeah, I want her to eat first," Meredith replied, propping a pillow behind her back and putting another one on her lap for Lilly to lie on while she nursed. She lifted up her shirt and Derek handed Lilly to her. "How about you eat a little bit?" she said.

Lilly yawned into Meredith's breast before latching on, and rested her hand atop it as usual. When Meredith was satisfied that she was sucking, she smiled. "Good job, Lillybug."

"Not hurting, right?" Derek asked.

"No, but she's strong, though. For as little as she is, she's pretty powerful," Meredith laughed, watching as Lilly eagerly sucked. "She's a good eater."

"She is."

Meredith looked over at him. "You don't feel left out, do you? I mean, I got to carry her for nine months, and now I'm the one that feeds her. I know if I were you, I might feel a little left out and I-"

"I don't feel left out," he promised, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "You just have the uterus and the boobs. That's biology, not you hogging her," Derek chuckled.

"Okay," Meredith smiled. "Just checking."

"She's already my little girl," he said. He took hold of Lilly's foot. "And when you're old enough, you'll be my fishing buddy, Lilly. I know you'll have Mommy for all of those girly things like bras and boyfriends, but I'll always be there for you. You can even talk to me about that stuff. Well, boyfriends, anyway. I have four sisters, and grew up in the middle of Girl-Land, so I'm pretty qualified. And when it comes to proms and your wedding, I'll be there for that, too."

Meredith couldn't help but smirk. "Just don't do what Daddy and I did at the prom."

"Yeah, panties stay on at the prom, got it, princess?" he said, feigning sternness. He kissed Meredith's temple. "Maybe we should keep that between us. Lilly doesn't need to hear about our sexcapades."

"No, definitely not," Meredith shook her head. "There's a lot of stuff we need to make G-rated for her."

"You mean when she asks us how you and I met, we leave out the part where we had several rounds of wild, dirty sex on your living room floor?"

Meredith laughed. "Yes, like that."

"Agreed," Derek said, trying to stifle a yawn as the exhaustion of the past two days seemed to envelop all three of them. "Is it weird not being pregnant anymore?" he asked.

"Very. I was waiting for her little kicks this morning when I woke up, but then I remembered that she was in the isolette, not in me. I miss that," Meredith said, running her finger over Lilly's cheek. "I can't believe those little feet could kick me so hard. Or that she could fit inside me in the first place."

"Hey, at least you get to sleep on your stomach tonight. You haven't been able to do that since you were, what? Four months pregnant?" Derek said.

Her eyes widened and she smiled. "Holy crap, you're right."

"One of the many perks of having her on the outside," he said.

"I don't think I've ever been more excited for bedtime," Meredith joked. "Her eyes have been closed for a while. She'll probably be finished eating soon. Then you can have burping duty. She already peed on you. What's a little spit up?"

Derek laughed. "You think it's funny now. Just wait until she does it to you."

"Oh, I fully expect her to poop on me at some point. But tonight, you seem to be the lucky one," Meredith said. Lilly pulled away from Meredith's breast, satisfied now that her stomach was full.

"All done?" Derek asked.

Meredith gently glided the baby from her arms to his. "Give us a few burps, then you can sleep, okay?" she said to Lilly before getting up out of bed to change her shirt, which was still wet after Lilly's bath. "You think she's eating enough, right?"

"Yeah. She always eats when she's hungry. And she picked up on breastfeeding right from the start," Derek said, propping Lilly over his shoulder and rubbing her back with his hand. He cocked his head at her. "I like this side of you."

"What side?" Meredith asked after changing her shirt. She pulled back the covers on the bed and rolled on her stomach for the first time in months. "Oh, God. I missed this so much."

"Make you glad Lilly is on the outside?"

She sighed happily into her pillow. "Yes," she said. "What side?"

"The side of you that worries about how much she poops and eats. I love it," Derek said, leaning over to press a kiss to the back of her head.

"I have mom brain. It's kind of freaking me out. Stupid estrogen," Meredith sighed. She sat up against the headboard again, and saw Lilly looking at her, her head resting on Derek's shoulder. "Hi, peanut. Can you burp? Maybe one or two?"

Lilly smacked her lips together and nuzzled her face into Derek's shoulder as though it were a pillow. Before she actually fell asleep without burping, Meredith patted Derek's thigh. "Try sitting her on your lap."

"Alright," Derek said, gently moving Lilly from her place against his chest to his lap.

"Make a C-shape with your hand, and put it under her chin. Yeah, like that," Meredith said. She grabbed a burp cloth and set it on his thigh in case she spit up. "There. Now try. I read that helps sometimes."

Derek started patting Lilly on the back, and within seconds, a small half hiccup-half burp escaped from her mouth. "That's it. Have another one for me?" he said.

"Even one out the other end would be fine," Meredith said, smirking at Derek.

"That works, too. Whatever you need to—" Derek stopped when he felt something warm running down his hand and arm. "Aah, first pee, now spit up," he laughed.

"That's how she shows her love, by excreting bodily fluids on you. Right, Lilly?" Meredith said with a smile.

"I'm flattered," he joked, taking the burp cloth and wiping Lilly's mouth and chin before cleaning himself off.

When Lilly gurgled out a final burp while yawning, Derek picked her up and kissed her cheek. "Okay, we'll let you sleep now."

Meredith caught the baby's yawn, and lay down in bed on her side. "And we can sleep, too."

"It's not even nine o'clock," Derek chuckled as he laid Lilly down in her safe sleeper, a mini-bed with padded sides for her to sleep in between both of them.

"I gave birth this weekend. Nine o'clock is just fine with me," Meredith teased. She caressed Lilly's hand with her finger, and let Lilly grab hold of it. "I'm right here, peanut. Boobs and all. When you're hungry again, you let me know, okay?"

Derek shifted under the covers and onto his side so they were both facing inward at the baby, her long, dark eyelashes fluttering as she chased her sleep. He let Lilly hold onto his finger, too. "Hmm, yesterday, she was in your uterus, and now, she's lying between us in our bed."

"And holding our fingers," Meredith said softly, smiling at her husband across from her.

"And holding our fingers," he echoed. "I love you, princess."

Meredith leaned over Lilly to kiss him, then she kissed Lilly, who was already sleeping. "I love you, too."

Derek twisted around and turned off the lamp on his nightstand, Lilly still keeping his finger hostage in her tiny hand. "Bedtime?" he asked, the third to catch the circle of yawns.

"Mhm," Meredith hummed, resting her head close to Lilly's. "Goodnight, Lillybug."

"See you in a half hour when she wakes us up."

Meredith laughed softly. "Yeah, see you then."


	107. Settling In

**Disclaimer: Not the owner; just a fan.**

**Once again, sorry for the delay. It's been a busy few weeks. But college is finished now (yay!) so I'm hoping to have more writing time. Also, depending on how this season finale goes, I might be writing a 'fix-it' one shot, maybe more than one. But we'll see. Enjoy!  
**

The blissful lull of sleep lasted no more than an hour before Lilly started fussing, wriggling around between them. Derek woke up first, and scooped her tiny body into the crook of his arm, leaning against the headboard.

Meredith's eyes opened and she yawned. "Is she okay?" she asked, brushing her hair away from her face.

"I think so. She probably just needs some help falling back to sleep," Derek said. He smiled down at Lilly, who was curling into him, her cheek against Derek's shirt. "Daddy's got you. Go back to sleep, princess."

Meredith smiled at him, watching as Derek gently bounced the baby in his arm. "She feels so safe with you."

"I always want her to feel that way," he said softly. Lilly's eyelids fluttered closed, and Derek kissed the top of her dark head of hair. He carefully laid her back down on the safe sleeper and when she didn't budge, they both nodded in satisfaction.

"Nice work," Meredith said, stretching her arm across Lilly to pat Derek's shoulder.

Derek took hold of her hand and laced his fingers through hers. "Thank you."

They both fell back to sleep before they could say anything else, even though it was only 10:15. _Sleep when the baby sleeps_, advice found in every baby book, and given by Derek's own mother. Not only that, but the end to an exhausting weekend finally caught up to them, so sleeping effectively trumped conversation.

It was just after one in the morning when Lilly woke up again, her soft cry alerting both of them immediately. Meredith could tell just by the fullness of her breasts that Lilly would need to eat, and she flicked on the portable nightlight on her end table. A soft, barely there yellow light flooded the room, making it easier to see. Meredith reached for Lilly and patted her bottom soothingly.

"Are you hungry, peanut?" she asked.

"I'll take her," Derek said, swapping Lilly from her arms to his while she set up to nurse.

Meredith set a pillow on her lap and lifted her shirt, making sure to sit up against the headboard so it would be easier for both of them. "Okay."

Derek handed her to Meredith again, and she hugged Lilly to her, and guided the baby to her breast. "That's it," she cooed after the baby latched on with relative ease. "Wow, you really were hungry, huh?"

Her little lips sucked with determination, and Derek laughed. "Not bad. She only woke up twice in the past six hours, and the first time, she went back to sleep in under five minutes."

"She has doctor DNA. She might be ready to start her day at six in the morning," Meredith pointed out playfully. "You can sleep in, Lilly, as late as you want."

"If she wakes up early and isn't hungry, I'll take her downstairs with me. We can make Mommy breakfast and let her sleep in," Derek told the baby, fixing the footie on her pajamas.

"I'll get up, too. It's only fair," Meredith shrugged.

Derek kissed the crown of her head after she leaned on his shoulder. "Breastfeeding burns up a lot of energy. If you want to sleep, you should sleep. Plus, you gave birth two days ago. I think you've earned it."

Meredith yawned. "'Kay, I'll try. But eventually, my boobs will wake me up. And that's when Lilly will want to eat," she said, combing Lilly's hair with her fingers. "Funny how mother nature works, isn't it?"

"You two are already in sync," Derek said.

"We totally are. Like..." Meredith paused before laughing. "I'm too tired to think of a metaphor."

"Me, too."

Lilly looked up at them, her blue eyes wide and her long, dark eyelashes fanning over her cheeks every time she blinked. Meredith smiled and turned to Derek. "Is it just me, or does she not look tired?"

"A full belly is supposed to make you sleepy, princess," Derek said, trying to stifle a yawn.

"I would turn the nightlight off, but I want to be able to see her so I know when she's finished," Meredith said.

"Is she still eating?"

Meredith looked down and saw Lilly's lips only gently sucking, not as eagerly as she was when she started. "I think she's getting full."

"It's a little past 1:30. If she falls asleep soon, she probably won't be up again until after four," Derek assumed, chuckling lightly.

"What?"

"You know what we were doing at this time, three days ago?" Derek asked her.

Meredith bit her lip as she tried to think back to what they'd been doing on Friday night, then she laughed, too. "Having labor-inducing sex," she recalled. "Which, by the way, finally worked, because Lilly is here."

"And no more S-E-X for a while," Derek said, feigning disappointment.

"Yeah, you're on your own until mid-July. My hoo-hoo is off limits," Meredith smiled at him. "But we can still make out during her nap times. I'm still a hormone carnival, and you're still my hot husband."

Derek grinned. "I can do that."

"Good."

Lilly unlatched from Meredith's breast and smacked her lips together, her signal to them that she was finished. Meredith wiped the corners of Lilly's mouth, then handed her to Derek. "You're such a good eater," she praised as she cleaned up and readjusted her shirt.

"Alright, burp time again," Derek said, holding Lilly to his chest before patting her on the back. "A few good burps, then it's calm, sleepy time."

Meredith smiled when she saw Lilly staring at the headboard, her cheek on Derek's shoulder. "She's calm. But sleepy? Not so much," Meredith said, kissing the baby's forehead. "Maybe our headboard is too... visually stimulating or whatever."

"You picked it," Derek reminded her, laughing. "I wanted the simple, black wooden one."

"Well, we needed the padded one for... recreational purposes," Meredith said.

Derek smirked at her. "Hmm..."

Lilly interrupted the conversation with a burp, and they both looked at her. "Ooh, good one," Meredith encouraged. She smiled at Derek. "You're like the Baby Gas Whisperer."

"It's a gift," Derek said. "Well, that and the fact that I've been burping babies since I was in college. Uncle Derek spent many weekends babysitting when he could have been out partying with Mark."

"That's because you're that guy. The one that chooses your nieces and nephews over nights of random, drunken sex."

Derek laughed as he shifted Lilly on his shoulder so she was more upright. "Since when does partying equal random, drunken sex?"

"Clearly, you and I had very different college experiences..." Meredith said.

"Am I better off not knowing about yours?"

"Probably, yeah."

Lilly's little cheeks puffed out as she burped again, then she popped her tiny thumb into her mouth, resting her head on Derek's shoulder. A small sound left Meredith's throat and she leaned down to kiss her. "Good job, Lilly."

"No more?"

"Don't think so," Meredith said, smiling when she saw Lilly looking at her, a content yet awake expression on her tiny face. "How about we try to get some sleep?"

"Let's lay her down again. Maybe if you turn off the light and we keep things quiet, she'll get sleepy," Derek suggested.

He kissed Lilly's cheek, then laid her between them again. Once she was settled, Meredith flicked off the night light. Darkness flooded the room, and they both waited in silence to see if Lilly would get the hint and try to sleep. "All clear?" she whispered, her voice barely audible.

"I think so."

But as soon as they resettled, heads on their pillows, Lilly decided she wasn't ready to settle quite yet. She let out a small, fussy cry, and Derek laughed. "And we're up..." he said, picking Lilly up once again while Meredith turned on the night light.

"I read that newborns like to be swaddled when they sleep. Being wrapped up reminds them of the womb or whatever. I thought you spent enough time in there, peanut," Meredith joked.

"Why do you think she stayed seven extra days? Must be pretty nice in there," Derek said, smiling down at Lilly, who was lazily sucking her thumb, the fingers of her same hand splayed over her face. "Worth a try."

"Okay," Meredith said, reaching over to grab the soft, chenille blanket Derek's mom got Lilly from her yet-to-be-used bassinet.

After she spread it out on the bed, Derek laid the baby on it, making sure she was in the middle of it so they could wrap her up comfortably. "Want me to?" he asked.

"I'll give it another try," Meredith said. She bit her lip as she carefully folded, wrapped, and tucked, just how Derek so expertly did it last time. Once Lilly was swaddled into her tiny blanket cocoon, Meredith looked to Derek. "How'd I do?"

"Perfect. I couldn't have done it any better."

"Really?"

"Really," he said, picking Lilly up and putting her between them. "How's that, Lilly? Remind you of your days in-utero?"

"She was only... in-utero thirty-six hours ago."

"I know. That's why she should remember it," Derek smirked as they shuffled around and got comfortable in bed again, too. "Okay, let's try this again."

Meredith propped herself up on her elbow. "You okay, Lillybug? She doesn't seem to mind it. Do you think she's hot?"

Derek chuckled. "Babies like to be warm. Plus, we have the air on. She's fine. And if she's not happy, she'll let us know," he said, leaning over to kiss Meredith before she turned off the night light.

"Hmm, okay," she murmured against his lips, watching as Lilly's eyelids fluttered back and forth between open and closed. "I think we did it," she whispered.

Derek smiled in satisfaction when he saw his daughter yawn widely, her little mouth stretching into an O shape. "We're very impressive."

"We are," Meredith agreed, finally turning off the night light.

"Love you, Lilly," Derek said, catching Lilly's yawn then kissing her cheek.

Meredith kissed her other cheek. "Love you, sweetpea," she said.

"We should be good until sunrise."

She smiled into her pillow. "Fingers crossed."

...

Lilly only woke once more to eat around six o'clock, and to their surprise, she actually fell back to sleep before she was even finished nursing. The swaddling kept her calm and happy, and there weren't any meltdowns, from either Lilly or her parents. Meredith opened her eyes and yawned. The time staring back at her from the clock on her nightstand said 8:17, which was far later than she expected to wake up. She rolled over and saw that the other side of the bed was empty.

She quickly made the bed, went through her morning routine, and walked downstairs. When she reached the kitchen, Meredith stood in the doorway and smiled. "Hey."

"Morning," Derek greeted, Lilly cradled in one arm, while he made breakfast with the other. He skillfully flipped the French toast with a spatula, then held out a glass of orange juice. "Juice?"

"Thank you," Meredith said. She sat down on a stool at the island and took the glass from him. "When did you get up?"

"About an hour ago. She started to fuss, so I brought her down here before you woke up. We watched some TV and she fell asleep while I was holding her. I figured you'd be up soon, so I wanted to get a start on breakfast. We were having some Daddy-Lilly time, weren't we?" Derek said, kissing Lilly's cheek before handing her to Meredith.

"Yeah?" she asked as she peeked into Lilly's diaper.

"Already taken care of," Derek said, sliding a plate of French toast in front of her. "She pooped about a half hour ago. All clean."

Meredith cocked her head. "She pooped, and you didn't wake me?"

Derek laughed. "Why would I wake you for a dirty diaper? I took care of it; no biggie."

"She peed, too?" Meredith asked, biting into a piece of her toast.

"Yes, number one and two. Her plumbing works," Derek assured her.

"Just making sure."

He lowered the flame under the frying pan when the washer and dryer buzzed, signaling that the cycles ended. "I'll be right back. I'm gonna go throw some more laundry in."

Meredith smiled down at Lilly, letting her hold her finger. "Did I mention I really love Daddy?" she said to the baby.

Derek reentered the kitchen and set a basket of clean clothes down on the table, then returned to the stove. He cracked a few eggs into a bowl and whisked them with a fork, looking up when he felt Meredith's eyes on him. "What?" he chuckled.

"You. You're all... Super Dad," she said, laughing. "Do you know how hot and bothered that makes me?"

Derek grinned smugly. "Really?"

"Really."

Lilly turned into Meredith's chest and yawned, then put her thumb in her mouth once again. "You are so cute," Meredith said, combing Lilly's hair with her fingers. She turned to Derek. "Thank you for letting me sleep today."

"I wanted you to. How are you feeling? Still sore?" Derek asked.

"A little, yeah. But I feel good," Meredith said, laughing when Derek loaded her plate up with a pile of scrambled eggs. "What're you doing?"

"You need protein."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully then stabbed a forkful. "So, if Egg Mountain is only one breakfast course, what's for lunch?" she asked as she chewed.

"Mark called a few minutes before you came down. He and Bridget and bringing lunch over when they drop Charlie off and come to see Lilly. They have gifts, too," Derek said.

"They already got us gifts," Meredith said as she bounced Lilly gently in the crook of her arm.

"Lilly is Mark's pride and joy. And Bridget loves buying her stuff. Even if I said not to, they would anyway," Derek pointed out.

Meredith smiled down at the baby. "Hear that? Everybody loves you."

"We might have to buy another dresser for all her clothes soon," Derek said as he topped off her glass of orange juice.

"Well, lucky for you, all of your clothes are tiny, Lilly," Meredith told her.

Derek laughed. "Just wait until the next shipment from my mom and sisters gets here..."

"They're sending us _more_?" Meredith asked, her eyes wide.

"I'm the only son in the family. They spoil me even though I tell them not to. And Lilly's my daughter, so by proxy, she reaps the benefits... the frilly, pink benefits," he joked, biting into his own forkful of eggs.

"Mark wanted to get her a Giants cheerleading outfit, but I said no sports clothes unless it's the Red Sox or the Patriots," Meredith giggled, waiting for his reaction.

"Uh uh. No Boston stuff." Derek shook his head. "New York pride only. Giants or Yankees."

Meredith scoffed. "No freaking way. Right, Lilly? Tell Daddy he's crazy."

"Fine, we'll compromise. We'll root for Boston and New York, unless those teams are playing each other. Then we let Lilly decide," Derek said.

"Deal."

Lilly looked up at Meredith, her tiny forehead scrunched up in wrinkles. Meredith laughed. "You have no idea what we're talking about, do you?" she asked, feeling along her breasts. "Do you wanna eat, sweetpea? If I feed her now, I should be able to feed her again before Mark and Bridget get here. And I'd really rather Uncle Mark not make any comments about my huge, perky boobs."

"He means it as a compliment," Derek sighed, putting the orange juice back in the fridge. "I'll clean up and meet you in the living room."

Meredith carefully got up off the stool and smiled at him. "Wow. I need to give birth to your children more often."

"Taking advantage of me?" Derek smirked.

"Maybe."

Derek kissed her cheek after he walked around the island to collect her breakfast dishes. "Compared to what you did two days ago, the least I could do is cook you breakfast and do some laundry," he said.

"Thank you."

"Happy to do it," he said, kissing Lilly's forehead.

As Meredith walked into the living room, she looked down at the baby and smiled at her. "Think I could get him to massage my feet, Lilly? I think I could."

...

Derek opened the front door when he saw Mark's car pulling into the driveway. He could see Charlie wagging his tail in the backseat and he smiled. "Mer, they're here," he called upstairs where Meredith was getting Lilly dressed.

Meredith walked carefully down the steps with the baby, who was wearing a little pink dress and a matching pair of pink socks. "All dressed," she said as she reached the bottom.

"Very pretty. Both of you," Derek grinned, kissing Meredith's cheek as she leaned into him.

Derek held the door open and Charlie ran inside the house ahead of Mark and Bridget, walking in circles around both of them in excitement. Derek knelt down and scratched him behind the ears. "Hey, Charlie. We missed you."

"Guess who's here?" Meredith said, smiling when Charlie stood up on his hind legs and sniffed the tiny little person Meredith was holding in curiosity. "This is Lilly, your little sister."

"You two are gonna be good buddies," Derek said.

Bridget walked through the door holding a gift bag, and Mark trailed in behind her, clutching a handful of balloons and a plastic bag full of food. "Hey, guys," Bridget greeted, gasping in awe when she saw Lilly. "Hi, Lilly. God, she's adorable."

"Thank you," Derek grinned, taking the bag from her before the four of them went into the living room. "And thanks for these, too," he said as he set the gift bag on the table.

"You really didn't have to do that," Meredith said.

Bridget waved it off. "Oh, stop. We wanted to," she said, sitting down on the couch. "Okay, hand her over."

Meredith laughed, passing Lilly over into Bridget's arms, then sitting down onto the couch next to Derek. She patted the other side and Charlie immediately hopped up and curled next to her, his head resting on her lap.

"She's so beautiful," Bridget said softly, rubbing Lilly's cheek with her finger. "She's even tinier than she looked in the pictures Mark showed me."

"You'd think that after seven days of extra cooking time in your uterus, she'd be toddler sized," Mark said, smiling at the baby.

"That's what it felt like," Meredith joked.

Bridget winced. "Rough delivery?"

"Pretty smooth, actually. Painful, but fast once I started pushing," Meredith admitted. "Could've been a lot worse. I'd do it all over again in a second."

"She pushed for under a half hour. She was incredible," Derek practically beamed.

Meredith leaned into him as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "And I didn't threaten to kill him, or cut off his penis, so all in all, it was a success."

"I'd say so. She's perfect," Bridget said.

"Well, we're biased, but we agree," Derek said, with a grin that reached his eyes. "She's such a good baby. Eats, sleeps, poops, cuddles. She's amazing."

Lilly stuck her thumb in her mouth, and Bridget awed out loud. "Okay, I'm in love."

"Me, too," Mark echoed, waiting impatiently for Bridget to give him a turn holding the baby. "Do I really have to share my godparent duties with Yang?"

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Yes, you do."

"Fine, but let the record show that I babysat the dog while you two were at the hospital. That wins me more points than Yang," Mark clarified.

"It's a competition?" Derek chuckled.

"Everything's a competition with Yang."

"True," Meredith agreed. "How was he?" she asked, petting the top of Charlie's head.

"He was good. Didn't give us any problems," Bridget said before laughing. "He even hopped up on the bed with us at night."

Mark sighed. "Yeah, that was fun. He slept diagonally between the two of us. I was an inch away from falling off the edge."

"Yeah, he does that," Meredith smiled. "He likes to cuddle. Back when I was trying to get pregnant, we'd have to make sure he was occupied with a chew toy or a bone down here, then we'd go sneak upstairs to have sex..."

"Or we'd have sex at the hospital. We're still not sure if Lilly was conceived in our bed, my office, or the fourth floor on-call room," he admitted, kissing Meredith's temple. "Doesn't matter, though. We still made an awesome baby," he said proudly, untying the plastic bag and pulling out the containers of food so they could eat.

"I almost walked into one of those on-call rooms, but then I heard the moaning on the other side of the door, so I kept on walking," Mark informed them with a sigh.

Meredith laughed slightly. "That should embarrass me, but really, once you've had your legs in the stirrups and had three people watch you push a baby out, nothing fazes you anymore," she said as Derek kissed the top of her head, before he went into the kitchen for plates and drinks.

"So does that mean baby number two is up in the air?" Bridget asked, fixing Lilly's sock after she wiggled her feet.

"Actually, no. I mean, if the next labor and birth can go as smooth as Lilly's, I'd be happy to do it all over. We definitely want two, though. Lilly needs to have a sibling," Meredith said, smiling at her daughter who sucked determinedly on her thumb.

"And a cousin from you two would be nice," Derek said, walking back into the living room with four drinks, four plates, and four sets of utensils.

"We just got married three weeks ago," Mark reminded him as Bridget finally passed Lilly to him. He smiled at her. "Hey, beautiful. Yeah, you're good practice. Hands on, like one of those dolls that eats and poops and cries."

"She does all of those things well," Derek boasted.

"She was dry when I changed her into her outfit before you got here. She probably peed by now. How about you change her after we eat?" Meredith challenged Mark as he gently bounced Lilly in his arm.

Mark tore his eyes away from the baby and looked at her. "I can do that."

"She peed on Derek last night before we gave her a bath," Meredith laughed, shoveling a few forkfuls of spaghetti onto her plate from the plethora of Italian food Mark and Bridget supplied. "It was so cute."

"Does that mean you'll pee on me, too?" Mark asked Lilly. "How about we just save that for your dad?"

True to his word, when they were finished eating a short time later, Meredith handed Mark a fresh diaper and a pack of wipes. "Here you go. Practice your parenting skills on my daughter."

Mark set the diaper and wipes next to him on the couch, then laid Lilly down on the cushion between himself and Bridget, covered with a changing pad. "Are you really gonna stand over my shoulder to supervise?" he asked, laughing.

"Mark Sloan changing a diaper? I want to see this," Meredith defended.

"Me, too," Bridget echoed, waving down at Lilly when the baby looked at her.

Mark lifted up her little pink dress over her belly, then peeled back the adhesive on the diaper front. "There's no surprises in here, right?" he asked the baby, pulling down the diaper. He sighed in relief. "Good, no poop. Not that I wouldn't have been able to handle it," he said, pulling a wipe from the pack.

"Wipe front to back," Meredith couldn't help but remind him.

Mark turned around and looked at her. "I'm not incompetent, Grey," he said, gently wiping Lilly clean before removing the old diaper from underneath her bottom. He carefully set her legs back down, holding each of her feet with his thumbs and forefingers.

Derek laughed. "She's not gonna break, Mark. You don't have to handle her like she's made of glass," he said.

"My fingers are thicker than her ankles. I'm afraid," Mark joked. He put the fresh diaper under her, made sure it was on right, then sealed the adhesive strips on either side. After fixing her dress, he picked her up and smiled. "Clean diaper. No fussing. And she's still alive."

"I'm impressed," Meredith said.

"I'd like to see Yang do that," Mark said.

"He has a point," Derek agreed.

"Oh, before we forget, open your gift," Bridget said, nodding toward the coffee table. "Mark picked it out all by himself."

"You?" Derek asked.

Mark nodded as he handed Lilly back to Meredith. "Yep. She's gonna look gorgeous in it."

"You open it," Meredith said to Derek, sitting next to him on the couch.

Derek pulled the pink tissue paper out of the gift bag and smiled as soon as he saw what was underneath it. "I don't think Mommy's going to let you wear this, Lillybug..."

"What is it?" Meredith asked. She watched as Derek took the outfit from the bag, a disapproving smirk coming over her face when she saw what was inside. "No way."

Derek held up a red, white, and blue baby-sized cheerleading outfit, the word _GIANTS_ embroidered across the chest. "What do you think, Lilly? Giants fan like Daddy, right?"

Lilly scrunched her eyebrows together and pursed her lips, as though she disapproved of the outfit altogether. Meredith laughed at the tiny expression on Lilly's face. "Oh, God, Derek. That's your grumpy face."

Mark raised himself off the couch to get a better look, then he grinned. "She's right; it is. That's a trademark Derek face right there."

Derek frowned. "I don't have a grumpy face," he countered.

"When you're tired and moody in the morning? Same face," Meredith said. She pressed a few kisses to Lilly's cheek and smiled. "That was good, Lilly. Perfect timing."

"Clearly, she's not a fan of New York sports," Bridget teased. "For the record, the store also sold a mini bullhorn and pompoms, but I drew the line."

"I'm saving those for Christmas," Mark said.

Meredith shook her head, amused. "You know, you're lucky you're a good diaper changer; otherwise, I'd make you take it back and exchange it for a Patriots one instead," she joked.

"The Patriots? Oh, come on..." Mark interjected.

"She lived most of her life in Boston. Too late to convert her now," Derek said, setting the little outfit on the coffee table. "Which is why I need to get Lilly on my side as soon as I can."

Meredith patted Derek's shoulder in mock sympathy. "Yeah. Just try."


	108. Up All Night

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

**So sorry for the delay. I was on vacation, and forgot to post before I left. Oops. Anyway, enjoy!**

One week had passed, and the Shepherd household was officially taken over by a new baby. Lilly-palooza, as Derek had to aptly dubbed it. Blankets, socks, onesies, and stacks of diapers piled high on nearly every surface. It was exhausting, but they wouldn't trade a minute of it.

Meredith rubbed her eyes and yawned, cradling Lilly in one arm as she dumped some Cheerios into a bowl. The thunder outside clapped loudly and she jumped at the sound it made. "Sorry about that, Lilly," she laughed when the baby looked up at her in curiosity. She poured some milk on top of the cereal, grabbed a spoon from the drawer, and hopped up onto a stool.

"I'm getting good at this whole one-handed thing," she told Lilly before shoveling a bite into her mouth. Over the past few days, eating had become nothing more than a way to fuel her body. She never thought breastfeeding would take so much energy, and Derek sometimes had to remind her to eat. Lilly trumped eating and sleeping, but they didn't mind. Lilly was more important and fun than either of those things, anyway.

When Meredith heard Charlie barking by the front door, she smiled. "Daddy's home," she said. "And just in time, because I could really use a shower."

Derek walked through the door and into the kitchen, grocery bags in each of his hands. "Hey," he greeted, leaning in to kiss Lilly's forehead before kissing Meredith.

She smiled. "Hey," she murmured against his lips. "Still raining, huh?"

"Hmm, what gave it away?" Derek asked, running his hand through his wet hair. "So, what did she do while I was gone? Did I miss anything cute?"

"Well, she ate. And then she pooped. And she decided to be squirmy, so there was poop everywhere, including on me," she laughed, running her finger over the baby's cheek. "So she had a bath, and now I'm eating cereal for dinner."

"Sounds like you had a busy hour," Derek chuckled, taking the groceries from the bags and setting them on the counter. "Oh, I got those new wipes, the ones in the green pack. They're for sensitive skin."

"I got rid of the other ones this afternoon. They were making her butt all red. You got the sensitive skin from me. Sorry, sweetpea," Meredith said to Lilly.

"These should help," Derek said as he pulled the wipes from the bag.

Meredith took another spoonful of cereal into her mouth. "What else did you get?"

"Granola bars, apple juice, mini carrots, chicken. Lots of foods that'll help you keep up your energy," Derek replied, opening the fridge.

"Thank you," Meredith said with a smile, though she would have preferred cookies and frozen pizza. But he was sweet enough to buy the food, and therefore eventually cook it, so she decided not to protest.

"So I was thinking that we could have some grown-up time after Lilly falls asleep tonight," Derek suggested.

Meredith bit her lip and laughed. "Uh huh. Does this involve nudity?"

Derek grinned. "It could. If you wanted it to."

"I had a baby seven days ago. You sure you want to see me naked?" Meredith asked playfully. "And I have to warn you... I kind of smell like a hamper and baby poop."

"You look beautiful. And you don't smell," Derek assured her. "But if you don't want to, we can keep it PG."

"Maybe PG-13. You look kind of sexy right now," Meredith shrugged.

Derek turned around and looked at her strangely. "I'm loading the dishwasher..."

"Still," Meredith upheld. She slid her empty cereal bowl across the counter and shifted Lilly to her other arm. "But I need to shower first, because I'm really not sure if this spot on my shirt is spit-up or toothpaste."

A loud clap of thunder sounded outside again, and Lilly's eyes went wide. Her lower lip quivered and she let out a cry, her little face scrunching with wrinkles. Meredith hugged Lilly to her chest. "Don't be scared, Lilly. It's just thunder," she soothed.

"Lilly, you're a Seattle baby. You're supposed to love clouds and thunder and rain," he joked.

"Well, she did pick a sunny day to be born on," Meredith pointed out.

"Come here, Lillybug. How about you and I email some pictures of you to your grandma and aunts while Mommy takes a shower?" Derek said, kissing Lilly's cheek after Meredith passed her to him. She looked up at him with her trusting blue eyes that matched his, then curled into him, her tiny thumb finding its way to her mouth.

"Thank you," she said, hopping off the stool. "Once she starts sleeping longer, you and I are going to start having grown-up time in the shower like we used to."

Derek grinned. "Can I get that in writing?"

She laughed. "Yeah, in between diaper changes, I'll write up a contract."

...

Lilly was fed, burped, changed, and sleepy, four factors needed for bedtime. She yawned as Meredith laid her in her swing in their bedroom where she liked to fall asleep sometimes before they carried her over to their bed, the side to side rocking lulling her to sleep. "Goodnight, peanut. We love you," she said softly, kissing the baby's forehead.

Charlie stretched out under Lilly's swing and rolled onto his side, keeping a protective watch on her like he always did. If she cried, he stopped whatever he was doing to come find her, and make sure she was okay. He was like her furry, brown big brother, a role he fell into as soon as he was introduced to her. "Good boy, Charlie," Meredith praised, scratching him under his chin.

"Are we having our grown-up time in here?" Derek asked.

"Well, I don't want to leave her in here by herself. Besides, she's asleep. And it's not like we're going to have sex... which means we should probably put a pin in the nudity portion of grown-up time, at least for tonight, until we get more creative," Meredith rambled on, only stopping because Derek started kissing her.

Meredith let out a moan but quickly stifled it, not wanting to wake Lilly who was only across the room. She nudged him back onto the bed and let herself fall with him. "I even shaved my legs for you," she said.

"Hmm," Derek hummed, an amused smile on his face as he kissed her again.

"I would let you feel me up, but my boobs are all swollen," Meredith said, letting him wrap his arms around her so he could shuffle them back toward the pillows.

Derek's fingers trailed down her back through her tee shirt and she arched into him. Her torso pressed against his, something she hadn't been able to do since she was five months pregnant. "You still look beautiful. Motherhood agrees with you."

"Thank you," Meredith said, combing her fingers through his hair and resting her hand by his temple. "It's a shame I'm off sex for five more weeks. All of these freaking hormones make me want to mount you all day."

"Yeah?"

"Mmhmm," she replied before kissing him again. After some quick mental math, she pulled her lips away. "Crap."

"What?"

"Our anniversary is July 12th. We won't even get to have sex. The six week mark isn't until the 17th," she said.

"Just gives us something to look forward to on the 17th," Derek pointed out, always finding the silver lining, much to her annoyance. "Two years this year."

"Two years married. But we met five years ago this July. Another reason we should be having sex," Meredith giggled, quickly glancing over at Lilly to make sure she was still fast asleep.

Derek smirked. "What happened to "the waiting is fun?" I remember you telling me that in the bathtub once upon a time," he reminded her playfully.

"I wasn't hopped up on baby hormones back then," Meredith defended. She bit her lip, a small smile on her face. "Even if we can't have sex, I'll let you feel me up. And maybe we could do... other things."

He raised his eyebrows. "Other things?"

"You have needs," Meredith shrugged, snaking her hand up the back of his shirt.

"So do you."

"Then you'll just owe me lots of sexual favors," she decided.

Derek kissed her as she rolled on top of him. "Okay, then," he said.

Another bout of thunder rumbled, and Lilly's eyes opened, disturbed once again by the loud, annoying sound outside. She let out a cry, clearly not happy with being woken up. Charlie quickly rose to his feet, glancing between Lilly and his parents on the bed, signaling that Lilly needed them.

"I got her, buddy," Derek told him, hopping off the bed and walking over to her swing. He unbuckled her and scooped her up. "You're really not a fan of this annoying thunder, huh?" he said, patting her diapered bottom soothingly with his hand.

"No, she's not," Meredith agreed, laughing when Charlie jumped up onto the bed after Derek sat down on it again. He spun in circles a few times, then plopped down by their feet, resting his chin on Meredith's leg. "Is it supposed to rain like this all night?" she asked, leaning forward to pet the dog.

"The heavy storm is supposed to pass soon. Then we're just getting rain until morning. Almost done with the thunder, Lillybug," Derek promised her, letting Lilly lie on his chest.

"She should be used to loud noises by now. I worked tons of extra shifts in the ER when I was pregnant with her to make up maternity leave hours. All of that hustle and bustle. I thought that stuff would be like a lullaby to you," Meredith joked, wiping away a small tear on Lilly's cheek with her finger. "That's Seattle for you, Lilly. All of the rain is annoying at first, but you get used to it, I promise."

"How about you sleep with us?" Derek said. "Mommy and I can save grown-up time for the shower."

Meredith elbowed him in the side. "Derek."

"What? That kind of grown-up time is why Lilly exists," Derek pointed out. He wrapped his other arm around Meredith and hugged her to him.

She smiled against his shoulder and kissed him there. "She's already a week old. Pretty soon, she'll be in kindergarten. Then we'll blink again, and she'll be in college. Then married. And you and I will be holding our grandkids."

"She can't even hold her head up by herself yet. We have some time," he chuckled softly. Lilly looked up at him, wide-eyed and alert, like she expected him to do something to entertain her. "You're not gonna fall back to sleep, are you?"

More thunder clapped on cue, and Lilly's crying started up again. Her little arms flailed and she balled her hands into tiny fists as her face turned red. "Shh, it's okay. Daddy's got you," Derek said, rubbing small circles over her back after he propped her over his shoulder.

Meredith knew all babies cried, but every time she heard the noise coming from her daughter, her stomach twisted and she found herself fighting back tears of her own. She put her hand next to Derek's on Lilly's back. "I know. I don't like the stupid thunder either, Lilly."

Lilly met Meredith's eyes as she rested her head on Derek's shoulder, and her crying instantly dwindled, loud wails dissolving into a small, fussy, hiccup-y noise. Meredith kissed her dark, fuzzy head. "I like it when he holds me too, Lilly. He makes you feel so safe, doesn't he?"

"You're always safe, Lilly," Derek promised her.

"And if you don't fall back to sleep, you're going to be cranky all day tomorrow, and if you're cranky, Mommy will be cranky, which means Daddy will be cranky," Meredith said, glancing at Derek.

Derek laughed. "That's because you let out all of that cranky energy on me."

"Exactly."

"She's tired. She'll fall back to sleep. We just need to help her along," Derek said. "How about the pacifier? We haven't even used that yet."

"Okay," Meredith said, trying to stifle a yawn. "All of the pacifiers are in the nursery. I'll be right back."

"Okay."

Meredith shuffled out of bed, out of the room, and into the hall, returning a minute later holding a pink pacifier shaped like a strawberry. "Got one."

"That's a fancy one," Derek said.

Meredith smiled. "Lexie got it for us, I think. The whole pack is fruit themed," she said, rejoining him in bed.

Derek settled Lilly into the crook of his arm. "Wanna try this, Lilly? It's kinda like Mommy's boob." Meredith smirked at him and he shrugged. "What? She has to suck on both. Same concept."

"Here you go, Lilly," Meredith encouraged, holding the pacifier lightly against Lilly's lips.

Lilly tentatively accepted it, taking it into her mouth. She sucked on it curiously for a few seconds, then spit it out. Derek laughed. "Pacifiers aren't your thing? I think I'd prefer boob, too."

"I don't think she's hungry. She just ate under an hour ago," Meredith said, feeling along her chest. "Maybe she's just... not tired anymore." She yawned. "Damn thunder."

"Think we should try putting her back in the swing? She likes the motion," Derek said.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, we could try."

Derek got up out of bed with Lilly and gently set her in the swing. But before he could even turn it on, she started crying again, her gummy, little wail enough to break Meredith's heart in two. Derek quickly picked her up again. "Okay, no swing," he said, bouncing on his heels.

Meredith held her arms out, smiling when Derek handed Lilly to her. "Come here, peanut," she said softly, kissing her forehead. She laid the baby on her chest, Lilly's face cushioned by her breasts. "How about you lay here, that way you can listen to my heartbeat?"

Derek rejoined them both in bed, turning off the lamp on his nightstand before reaching over Meredith and Lilly to get the nightlight off of hers. He set it on the nightstand next to him, then turned it on so that only a minimal flood of light spread out over the room. He kissed Meredith's temple and wrapped his arm around her. "Where'd you get that idea?"

Meredith shrugged. "She's been living inside me for nine months. Maybe that sound will soothe her," she said.

Lilly scrunched Meredith's shirt in her tiny fingers and yawned. "Mommy's a genius," Derek chuckled, draping the blanket his mom got her over her back. "She's closing her eyes."

"Once she starts sucking her thumb, we should be good," Meredith laughed. She kissed the top of Lilly's head and breathed her in. "I wish she could keep this little baby smell."

Derek leaned over and kissed the top of Lilly's head, too. "Hmm, I know."

Meredith smiled at Derek. "We really made a person. A tiny, perfect person," she said, watching as Lilly's back rose and fell as she breathed in and out. "June five years ago, I was getting ready to move out here from Boston. I didn't even want to come back to Seattle. But if I hadn't, I would never have met you. And Lilly wouldn't be here. Funny how life looks out for you, isn't it?" she laughed softly, wiping away the tears under her eyes with her free hand.

"Yeah," Derek whispered. Lilly scrunched her nose the same way Meredith did when she slept, and he smiled. "Yeah, it really is."

"I'm a weepy, hormonal mess," she sighed amusedly. "I used to be hardcore. Now I'm softcore."

Derek narrowed his eyes at her and smirked. "Did we just start talking about porn?"

"Shut up," Meredith said. She rested her head on his shoulder and yawned. "Think she'll stay asleep for a while?"

"Probably a few hours, until she needs to eat. You know, as long as Mother Nature keeps the outside world quiet," Derek said.

Meredith rubbed Lilly's back gently with her fingers. "You're safe, Lillybug. I love you," she said, turning her head to Derek. "And I love you."

"Love you both," Derek said, kissing the crown of Lilly's head, then kissing Meredith.

"We'll continue grown-up time during her nap time tomorrow," Meredith said as she closed her eyes.

Derek flicked off the nightlight and laughed through his yawn. "Sounds good."

...

Meredith felt Lilly pressing her lips against her chest and she opened her eyes, smiling tiredly down at her baby. "Hi, pumpkin," she whispered. She looked over at the clock as she rubbed her eyes. "Three hours. Not bad," she said, shuffling back against the pillows to rest her back against the headboard.

Derek woke up when he felt her move. "Hey. She's up?" he assumed, rolling over and sitting up.

"She was doing the rooting thing. She's hungry," Meredith said, adjusting her shirt. She held the baby to her breast and Lilly yawned before latching on. "There we go."

Derek slid the nursing pillow on Meredith's lap, under Lilly's bottom and Meredith smiled. "Thank you."

"No more thunder, huh?" Derek chuckled.

"Guess not. If there was, Lilly slept right through it, which is good. I want her to get on some sort of sleep schedule," Meredith said as they both yawned at the same time. "You can go back to sleep. There's no reason both of us need to be up."

"I don't mind," he said. "I know you'd stay up with me."

"You mean if you were the one with the boobs?" Meredith giggled. "It would nice to tag-team the breastfeeding once in a while. And, you know, if you could push the next baby out, that would be pretty nice, too."

"Then who would get you pregnant?" Derek smirked. "Clearly, I'm very good at that."

Meredith smiled. "Hmm, good point." Lilly opened her eyes and looked up at her. "Yes, we're talking about you," she laughed.

"Still not tired, Lilly?" Derek asked the baby, rubbing the bottom of her socked foot with his finger.

"She had no bedtime in my womb. It takes some adjustment, I guess," Meredith joked. She brushed her fingers through Lilly's hair. "I hope she gets curls in her hair like you have."

"Your hair is wavy. I've always been a fan of wavy..."

"Curls are more fun."

Derek grinned at her. "They are, huh?"

"The curls are one of the reasons I let you woo me the night we met," Meredith said.

"There was no wooing," Derek countered. "We were just drunk and easy."

Meredith scoffed. "I was _not_ that easy."

"You had your hand on my thigh by tequila shot number four," Derek laughed. "I'm surprised we didn't have sex in the back of the cab on the way to your house."

"Yes, you're a real victim," she said playfully. Lilly made suckling sounds with her mouth and Meredith looked down at the baby, who was still peacefully nursing, but awake. "Sorry, Lilly. This probably isn't typical Mommy-and-Daddy conversation for most babies."

"Some parents tell bedtime stories. We debate over which one of us got the other to sleep with them," Derek shrugged. "Different strokes, right Lilly?"

"I think she likes when we talk. She's known our voices for nine months," Meredith said. "Do you just want us to talk all night?" she asked Lilly.

"Maybe we could record ourselves talking on tape. Play it on a loop for her," Derek teased.

"We should," Meredith agreed. "Oh, how about you tell her a story?"

"What story?" he asked.

"I don't know. Anything. One of those Disney ones with the princesses and ponies and glitter," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "I don't recall any glitter."

"Whatever. You know what I mean. Cinderella or something," she said. "I've never seen it, so you have to tell it."

"You've never seen Cinderella?" Derek asked, his eyebrows raised.

"I know the story, but no, I've never actually watched it. I was raised on surgery tapes, not the magic of Disney," she giggled.

"Seriously?"

"Have you forgotten who my mother was? Yes, seriously."

"Well, we'll have to change that," Derek said. "Good thing we have a little girl so the two of you can experience all of those girly things together. Right, Lillybug?"

Meredith smiled. "What if the next one is a boy?"

"That's what my parents probably said," Derek chuckled. "Two girls, me, two more girls. When it came to Spiderman or Snow White, who do you think got outvoted every single time?"

"Aww," Meredith teased. "Well, what about Mark?"

"Mark helped, but we were still beat. Four girls to two boys," Derek said. "Right now it's two to two if you count Charlie. The next kid determines majority... unless it's twins. One of each would make it tied."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Haha," she said dryly. "Then I'd have one on each boob. Plus, we'd be outnumbered by kids."

"Oh. Right," Derek remembered. "Yeah, that could be dangerous."

"One is enough for now," Meredith said, looking down at Lilly and smiling when the baby pulled away from her breast and smacked her little lips together. "All done?" she asked.

"Burping time," Derek said, gently swapping Lilly from Meredith's arm to his. He set Lilly on his lap and started patting her back. She immediately let out a small burp that ended in a hiccup. And then another, and another. "Uh oh. Have the hiccups, Lilly?"

"She probably just has some extra air in her stomach," Meredith said, fixing her shirt. "I know, Lilly. Those things are annoying."

Every time she hiccuped, her eyes went wide as though she was surprising herself when one snuck up on her. "I know I shouldn't laugh because hiccups suck, but her face is adorable when she does it," Derek chuckled.

Lilly hiccuped again, her blue eyes looking startled each time, and Meredith couldn't help but laugh, too. "Remember when she had the hiccups when I was pregnant with her?"

"That was awesome," Derek said. "Your whole belly would jump."

"Only we can't give her peanut butter to make them go away," Meredith said, kissing the top of Lilly's head. "Try bouncing her as you burp her. Maybe that'll force some of the air out quicker."

Derek started to bounce his thigh with every pat on the back. "Try to burp again, princess," he encouraged.

A bout of thunder clapped outside, the sound loud enough that Lilly stopped mid-hiccup in surprise. She started to cry, and Meredith sighed. "You have got to be kidding me."

"Guess the storm isn't over yet," Derek said, cradling Lilly close to him as she settled. "Just a loud noise, Lilly. A loud, annoying, very inconvenient noise."

"It's okay, peanut," Meredith yawned. She looked over at the clock. "It's almost one. She really should sleep."

"How do we do that?"

"You could talk to her about boring stuff, like the myelination of the prefrontal cortex. That always puts me to sleep," Meredith teased as she yawned again. "See? Even saying it makes me tired."

Derek looked over at her, amused. "You're a neurosurgical resident. If I'm boring, you're boring, too," he said.

"I never said you were boring, just the material," Meredith said. She ran a hand through her hair and laughed. "Seriously, Derek. We need to make her sleepy."

"How about a bath? Her umbilical cord is healed up, so we could use the little tub. And we have that bedtime stuff. I know my sisters used that for their kids to help them sleep," Derek suggested. He smiled at Lilly. "Hey, the hiccups are gone."

"I guess the thunder scared them out of her," Meredith said, reaching for Lilly. "Maybe a bath will make you sleepy. Sound good, Lilly?"

"Nursery or our bathroom?" Derek asked.

"Bathroom, I guess. It's her first real bath. It could get messy," Meredith said. "Can you get the tub? I'll get everything else."

Derek nodded. "Yeah. Be right back," he said as he shuffled out of bed.

Meredith got up, too, Lilly cradled in her arm. The baby looked up at her curiously, her thumb in her mouth. "You are so cute," Meredith cooed at her as she walked into the bathroom. She took a towel and washcloth from the shelf and set it by the sink. "Okay, where is your bedtime bath?" she asked.

"Got it," Derek said as he walked into the bathroom holding the pink baby tub.

"Good," Meredith said. She rummaged through the cabinet and pulled out the purple bottle. "Okay, let's see how this goes, Lillybug." She stood up and handed the soap to Derek. "The water should be warm enough that she won't be cold, but cool enough that she won't be hot," Meredith said, recalling what she'd read in the baby book.

"In other words... lukewarm," Derek teased, putting the tub on the counter next to the sink.

Meredith glanced at him and made a face. "Shut up." With her free hand, she started unsnapping Lilly's pajamas, eventually working her way down to Lilly's leg before she pulled them off. She went to take off Lilly's diaper, but stopped. "Wait, don't start filling."

"What? Why?" Derek asked, turning off the faucet.

"Poop."

Derek laughed. "You really like to keep us entertained at all hours of the night, huh?" he asked Lilly.

"Thank you for doing it before the bath," Meredith said as they walked out of the bathroom and back into their bedroom. She gently laid Lilly down on their bed.

Derek got the changing pad and some wipes, then he cleaned Lilly up, completely unfazed by the dirty diaper. "Alright, all done," he said, stepping aside so Meredith could pick her up. "I'll go throw this out. I'll be back in a second."

"Okay," Meredith said, holding Lilly close to her so she would stay warm until they put her in the tub. "That's why I love him, Lilly. How many other men change diapers, unasked, with a smile on their face?"

"Talking about me?" Derek said after rejoining the two of them in the bathroom.

Meredith bit her lip and smiled. "Maybe."

Derek turned on the hot and cold faucets and waited for the water to get fairly warm before testing it with his hand. "This okay?" he asked.

Meredith put her hand under the stream of water. Not too hot; not too cold. She nodded. "Yeah, that's good."

"Okay," Derek said. He filled up the little, pink tub and set it on the counter. After he squirt some of the bedtime bath soap in the water, he mixed it in with his hand. "This smells like your conditioner."

"Now both of us will smell like lavender." Meredith kissed Lilly's forehead, then gently laid her in the tub. The water barely went past her belly, and she kicked her legs curiously. "You don't know what this is, do you?"

Derek laughed. "This is called bath time. Isn't it fun?" he asked, cupping his hand under the water and pouring some onto Lilly's stomach. She looked at the two of them contentedly, unfazed and relaxed.

"I'm surprised she actually seems to like it," Meredith said with a smile, wetting Lilly's arms with some water.

Derek cleaned her tiny toes with the wash cloth, and Lilly wriggled her feet. "Are you ticklish, princess?"

"I think she is," Meredith giggled, watching as Lilly yawned, then put her right thumb in her mouth, a telltale sign of sleepiness. She nudged Derek with her arm. "Look."

"It hasn't even been five minutes," Derek whispered. "If she falls asleep in here, how are we going to take her out without waking her up?"

"Um... very carefully," Meredith replied.

"At least we know baths make her tired."

"Lavender, chamomile, and oatmeal... powerful stuff," Meredith said.

"Maybe it reminds her of your womb. Warm and wet and squishy," Derek said.

Meredith laughed through her yawn. "Eww."

"What? I'm serious," he said.

"She looks so peaceful," Meredith said, leaning into him. "Must be nice being a baby. Getting to fall asleep in the bathtub, always having a clean diaper, twenty-four-seven access to my boobs."

"Remember the days when _I_ had twenty-four-seven access to your boobs? That was fun," Derek grinned.

"You've had twenty-four-seven access to my boobs practically every day for the past nine months," Meredith reminded him. "Aren't you glad I was one of those horny, pregnant women, and not one of those bitchy ones you hear about?"

"Yes, very," Derek chuckled, reaching for the bath towel. "Even when you gave birth, you were nice to me."

"And you'll get my boobs back when my celibacy is up five weeks from now," she promised. Meredith gently scooped Lilly out of the tub, careful not to jostle her and risk waking her up. She handed her off to Derek, who wrapped the towel around her, then held the baby close to him to keep her warm. "I'll clean up and be right in," she whispered.

"Okay," Derek said, looking down and smiling at his sleeping daughter, whose thumb was still in her mouth. Thumb-sucking was normally a good sign at bedtime, so he could only hope that she would stay asleep. He put her down on the bed and patted her dry. "Where's your lotion?" he asked, scanning the room before spotting it in the bassinet.

"I got it," Meredith said, walking into the room. She walked around the other side of the bed and handed it to him. After crawling back into bed, she yawned. "Oh. Powder," she remembered, twisting around to take it from her nightstand.

"Thank you," Derek said as he lifted Lilly's legs up and slid the diaper under her tiny bottom. He sprinkled some powder on her, then fastened the sides of the diaper together. "There we go."

Meredith smiled, watching as he maneuvered her legs back into her pink footie pajamas. When it came time to weave her arms through, Derek looked at her. "How do I do this without taking her thumb out of her mouth?"

"Crap," she whispered. "Uh... okay, let me swap it out with my finger for a second. Then once you get her arm through, we'll switch it back to her thumb."

"I feel like Indiana Jones. One wrong move and boom... trouble," he chuckled, managing to put her left arm through the sleeve.

"We can do it," Meredith said. With baited breath, she replaced Lilly's thumb with her pinky finger, allowing Derek to slip her arm through the pajamas. The baby's eyelids fluttered, but before she had the chance to notice and wake up, Meredith tucked Lilly's thumb back into her mouth.

Lilly started sucking peacefully again, and they both sighed in relief. "Nice work," Derek complimented as he snapped the pajamas up the middle.

Meredith smiled. "You, too," she said softly, gingerly placing the baby in her usual place between them.

Derek laid down on his side, Charlie still resting at their feet, and he closed his eyes. "Still wanna have grown-up time?"

She laughed as she turned off the night light. "Goodnight, Derek," she said. The room was finally dark and silent, and Meredith was almost afraid to move and disturb the peacefulness. "Derek?"

"Hmm?"

"If there's any more freaking thunder tonight, we're moving," she teased.

Derek smiled into his pillow. "Agreed."


	109. First Father's Day

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

"Do you know where the syrup is, Lilly? Because I can't find it," Meredith said to her daughter as she rummaged through the fridge. "You know, this is Daddy's first Father's Day. Lucky for him, he gets to celebrate it two weeks after you were born. I have to wait a whole year. But that's okay. That gives you and Daddy a year to plan," she joked, finally spotting the syrup bottle hidden behind the carton of orange juice.

She closed the fridge with her elbow and set the syrup on the counter. The French toast in the frying pan was golden brown and not burnt, which was more than she thought she was capable of. She glanced at the clock. 9:05. Derek would be coming downstairs soon, which gave her a small window of time to make this breakfast look presentable. She poured coffee into his mug and set it in front of his place at the island counter, then reached for two plates, one for each of them.

After putting the French toast on their plates, she chopped up a banana and some strawberries, and put the bowl between each of their plates. "Daddy is kind of a health nut, Lilly. When I was pregnant with you, he made sure every meal included a food from each food group. He's friends with the produce guy at the supermarket. You probably think I'm kidding, but I'm not," she said.

Lilly looked at her, a peaceful expression on her face as she sucked her thumb, happy to be in her swing, looking out the sliding glass door in the kitchen that overlooked the backyard.

"Good morning," Derek said as he walked into the kitchen, showered and dressed for the day. When he saw the food on the counter, he stopped and smiled. "What's all this?"

"It's Father's Day," Meredith said. She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him. "Lilly and I wanted to do something nice for you, so we cooked you breakfast."

"Thank you," Derek replied, leaning in and kissing her.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Happy Father's Day."

"Thank you," he whispered. He kissed her forehead, and spotted Lilly in her swing. "Thank you, Lillybug."

"You're welcome," Meredith said.

Derek walked over and scooped Lilly up out of her swing, and held her to his chest. "Good morning, princess. Thank you for the breakfast... even though Mommy made it," he laughed. He surveyed the counter and nodded, impressed. "You really made French toast?"

"Yes, I did. The first batch burnt, and the second batch tasted kind of egg-y, but I think I succeeded with this batch," Meredith said, taking a seat next to him at the island. "Want me to hold her?"

"No, I've got her," Derek said. He kissed the top of her fuzzy, dark hair. "You're the reason I get to celebrate Father's Day, you know that? Without you, this would just be a boring Sunday." He bit into a piece of French toast on his plate and chewed. "Wow."

"Wow?" Meredith echoed. "Good 'wow,' or 'wow, this is terrible?'"

Derek chuckled. "Good 'wow.' We can add French toast to the list of things you can cook," he said as he forked another piece.

"That extensive list that includes cereal, bagged salad, Pop-tarts, and canned soup?" Meredith asked sarcastically, smirking at him.

"Yes, and that list now includes French toast. And you sliced fruit," he noticed.

"I know you like fruit with breakfast. Plus, I figured this was safer than me scrambling eggs. I don't do eggs," she reminded him, thinking of the countless times she tried that ended up with the smoke alarm going off, or having to pour soupy yolk down the drain.

Derek patted her arm in playful encouragement. "One day, Mer. You'll get it."

"Shut up."

"So, what do you and Lilly have planned for today?" he asked, gently bouncing Lilly who was cradled in the crook of his left arm.

"That goes along with your gift. Well, one of your gifts," Meredith said.

"There's gifts? I thought Lilly was the gift."

"She is. But we had to get you something for Father's Day. It's just little things," Meredith said before taking a sip of her orange juice. "Want them now?"

"Can I?"

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully and hopped off the stool. "Well, they're your presents," she said. "I'll be right back."

"Okay," he said. He looked down at Lilly and smiled. "Mother's Day isn't for eleven more months, so you and I have almost a year to make sure that we impress Mommy."

Meredith came back into the kitchen, holding two presents in blue paper. She wrapped her arm around Derek from behind and kissed his neck, smiling against his skin when he leaned into her.

"I'm holding our daughter," Derek reminded her, laughing.

"I know. I just happen to find you incredibly sexy. Blame the hormones," she defended. She retook her seat, and put the gifts next to his plate. "Happy Father's Day."

Derek opened the first present with his free hand, his smile creasing his eyes when he saw what was hidden by the wrapping. A framed picture of the three of them on the day Lilly was born, both of them smiling, sitting on Meredith's hospital bed, Lilly curled into Derek's arm, looking up at him. The first family picture taken of them. He swallowed the lump in his throat, and felt the tears sting his eyes. "Thank you," he whispered. "This is... thank you."

Meredith kissed him, and rested her head on his shoulder. "I figured you could put it on your desk at work, next to our wedding picture. I got another copy for our house, too. And a lot of smaller copies."

"I love this picture," Derek said. He leaned over to examine it more closely. "God, Lilly already looks older than she did two weeks ago." He looked down at Lilly, who was mid-yawn. "Stop growing up so fast," he chuckled.

"I know," Meredith giggled, tickling the bottom of Lilly's foot. "So you like it?"

"I love it. Thank you, both of you," he said, tilting her chin up with his finger and kissing her. "I love you." He propped Lilly over his shoulder and kissed her cheek. "And I love you."

"Open the other one," she prompted, taking Lilly from Derek.

"Hey."

Meredith smiled, resting Lilly's head against her chest. "Sorry, I couldn't help it. I needed a turn," she said.

"Hmm, fine," he agreed as he took the second present off the counter. He peeled back the blue paper and grinned. "You really got her this? I don't believe it."

"Yes, I did. It took all I had not to buy a Red Sox one instead, which should prove how much we love you," Meredith said, speaking for Lilly and herself.

Derek held up a tiny, navy and white Yankees dress with matching ruffly bloomers to put over Lilly's diaper. "You'll really let me dress her in this, even though Mark already got us the Giants outfit, too?"

"I know we agreed to let Lilly choose which one she roots for, but since it's Father's Day, and she's two weeks old and doesn't care, I decided that she can be a Yankees fan for the day," Meredith explained. "And since there's a Yankees-Red Sox game on today, I thought it was appropriate."

"I'll wear my Yankees tee shirt too, Lilly. Father-daughter Yankee fans," he said proudly.

"Mhm," Meredith smirked, watching him revel in the victory she let him have. "Mark and Bridget are coming over later to watch the game, too. They're bringing all the food for a barbecue or something. So I thought before that, the three of us could take a ferryboat ride across the bay and go to lunch at that little café near the hospital. You know, the one with the fountain, where we went for our first breakfast date, or whatever."

"Back when we first met?"

"Yeah."

"And Lilly gets to wear this?" he asked, holding up the outfit.

Meredith feigned a dramatic sigh and smiled. "Yes, she can."

"You really planned this whole day for us?"

"Yeah. You've only been a dad for two weeks. Well, technically, you've been a dad since we conceived her, but still. You're so amazing with her. You get up with me three times a night when I nurse her when you could be sleeping, you change diapers, give her baths, make sure we both get to shower at least once a day," she laughed, reaching for his hand. "We're both just really lucky to have you, and I want you to know that."

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer to him. "You know, this is the first Father's Day in... twenty-five years that I'm actually happy to celebrate. I woke up this morning, and the first person I thought about was Lilly."

"You usually think about your dad?" Meredith asked.

"Hmm," Derek hummed in agreement. "Ever since he died, I usually tried to just ignore it. I mean, I always call my mom. It's a hard day for her. When we were little, she always had something nice planned for him. We would all go play baseball at the park near our house. Mark always came along, and we'd play four against four. Then we'd go home, and have a cookout. She always baked him a pineapple upside-down cake because it was his favorite. My dad worked six days a week at the hardware store. I don't remember him ever taking a sick day. And he never complained about it. He did what he had to do because he loved us."

Meredith smiled sadly and looked down at Lilly, rubbing her hand soothingly over the baby's back. She and Derek didn't have to struggle the way Derek's family did, but Meredith knew that if they did, Derek would do the same thing. Work hard every day, with a smile on his face, and he'd do it for her and Lilly. Meredith kissed his shoulder. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. But now that Lilly's here, I feel like I can be happy on Father's Day again, you know? I know it's just a greeting card holiday that Hallmark invented, but it means something now. Now, I'm a father to this beautiful, perfect, little person," Derek said, smiling when Lilly looked up at him, her head resting comfortably on Meredith's chest. "Holiday or not, I'm her father."

"Yeah."

"Hear that, Lilly? You're stuck with me," he chuckled, his mood already brightening, like it always did when he talked to Lilly.

"Her Yankee loving father," Meredith said playfully. "Don't worry, peanut. That'll be the last Yankees outfit you'll ever have to wear."

Derek laughed. "Why are you assuming she'll be a Red Sox fan?" he said before pausing. "And since when do you care about baseball?"

"I don't. I just like messing with you. That, and I've got Boston in my blood. The fact that I even married a Yankees fan is enough reason for me to be shunned from the city altogether."

"Good thing we live in Seattle, then," he smirked, grabbing the tiny Yankees dress from the counter. He gently took Lilly from Meredith and cradled her in his arm. "Speaking of which... let's go get you dressed, Lilly, then we can go on your very first ferryboat ride. Seattle is surrounded by water on three sides, you know," he told her.

Meredith smiled. "Daddy has a thing for ferryboats, Lilly. He told me that while waiting for an elevator one day," she said.

"Then Mommy and I made out in that elevator," he added as he walked out of the kitchen. "Because Mommy has no self-control," he whispered within Meredith's earshot.

Meredith caught up with them as he headed toward the stairs. "I heard that, Derek," she called out.

...

Meredith leaned against the rail of the ferryboat and brushed her hair away from her face. Derek stood next to her, holding their daughter. Both with dark hair, blue eyes, and wearing Yankee pride. She smiled at the two of them.

"Isn't this fun, Lilly? If it were up to me, Mom and I would take the ferryboat into work every morning," Derek said, letting Lilly sit on his arm so she could scope out the view.

"Remember back when I was like two months pregnant, it was warm for a November morning, and we took the ferry into work?" Meredith asked as she fretted with Lilly's yellow sunhat, making sure her face was shaded.

"And you threw up over the side," he finished for her. "Yep, I do. Fond memory."

Meredith made a face at him. "Haha," she said wryly. "You were the size of a lima bean, Lilly, but you were a powerful, little embryo. I used to just throw up. All day long," she laughed. "Daddy didn't even get his special grown-up time with me— not that I'm complaining. I would have suffered through hurling forty weeks straight if it meant we got to have you."

"Don't worry. Around month four or five, grown-up time was back and better than ever," he said, grinning at her.

"And I could actually ride the ferryboat again," Meredith said. She wrapped her arm around Derek and leaned into him. "Do you think she's cold?"

Derek laughed. "It's seventy-five and sunny. And she's wearing a sweater. I think she's good."

"Shut up. I have mom brain. I can't help it," she defended. "Do you like this, Lilly? You're a Seattle native like me, and are related to your ferryboat-loving father, so you should," she teased, making sure Derek caught her smile.

"She loves it," Derek said, chuckling when Lilly's eyes went wide as she watched the blue water sloshing next to the ferry. "Are you gonna be outdoorsy, like me? 'Cause I could really use a fishing partner other than Mommy. She used jellybeans for bait once. Then she got bored, and fell asleep with her head on my lap."

Meredith smirked at him. "You knew when you married me that I possessed no MacGyver skills."

"No, but I still got you to live in a house in the woods," Derek pointed out boastfully.

"Exactly. A house. Not a tent or a fort built out of tree bark," she laughed. She kissed the top of Lilly's hat-covered head. "I'm only outdoorsy to the extent of not peeing behind a bush. Although, I did birth a pony once. So that's nature-adjacent."

"You birthed a pony?"

"Yes," Meredith said. Derek looked at her blankly so she decided to elaborate. "When I was dating Finn."

"Aah, right," Derek said. "Well, I guess that's one wooing style. Tuna salads, pony births. Personally, I'm more of a 'dinner and a movie' kind of guy. But you know, to each his own. Right, Lilly?" he teased, leaning his back against the railing.

"Your wooing style was a cliché come-on mixed with alcohol," she reminded him.

"And yet, you still took me home for sex," Derek grinned. "And married me."

"And had your kid," Meredith said, rolling the sleeve of Lilly's sweater so her hand wasn't covered by it. "It was never any competition anyway. It was always you. Even though it took us a while to get it right, it was always you." She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him, smiling against his lips. "You and I should birth a horse, though. It was actually kind of awesome."

"I watched you give birth. You even watched yourself give birth. How does that even compare?" Derek chuckled.

Meredith smiled and nudged his hip with hers. "My point is, it's something everyone should do," she upheld. "See? I'm not entirely indoorsy."

"I never said you were. I said you didn't like fishing," Derek said.

"You implied it."

"Fine," he relented. "All I'm saying is that I want Lilly to be my fishing buddy. She clearly loves the water," he said, looking down at Lilly as she continued staring out into the water like it was the most fascinating thing she'd ever seen. "She has a thing for ferryboats."

"Uh huh," Meredith played along. "I'm sure she does."

...

"Here you go," Meredith said, handing a diaper, wipes, and changing pad to Derek, who was sitting on the couch, waiting for the baseball game to begin. "Lilly's all fed, and she has a surprise for you," she said. She kissed Lilly's nose, then swapped the baby from her arms to his.

"You're making me change a dirty diaper? On Father's Day?" Derek asked amusedly, though he didn't mind. He changed diapers with a smile on his face, day or night.

"I'm reminding you of your fatherly duties, one of which is cleaning baby poop," she replied, heading toward the stairs. "I need to freshen up before Mark and Bridget get here."

Derek smiled at her. "I'm kidding. I'm happy to do it," he said, lying Lilly on top of the changing mat on the couch cushion. There was a knock at the front door, and Charlie hopped off the couch next to Lilly and ran toward the foyer, barking at whoever was on the other side. "I got it, Charlie," Derek said, picking Lilly up and following the dog.

He turned the knob and smiled when he saw Mark and Bridget on the other side of the glass door. "Hey," he greeted.

"Sorry, I know we're early. Mark insisted on getting here before the game started," Bridget explained, holding a bag full of food.

"No, that's fine. Mer's just getting dressed, and I was about to change Lilly's diaper," he said.

Mark saw Lilly's outfit and a grin spread over his face. "No way. Grey actually let her wear this?"

"Meredith bought it," Derek corrected. Mark looked at him in surprise and he laughed. "I know. Her Father's Day gift to me," he said, reaching for the bag from Bridget with his free hand.

"I got it. I'll go put it in the kitchen," Bridget said. She leaned down and kissed Lilly's hand before walking toward the kitchen. "She got even cuter since the last time I saw her."

"So, how's Father's Day been so far?" Mark asked.

"We took the ferryboat over to the city and had lunch. Lilly loved it. She was awake the whole time," Derek said, smiling down at his daughter. "And now we're going to watch our first Yankees game together. Pretty great day," he boasted. They walked into the living room, and Derek laid Lilly on the cushion again so he could change her. "Alright, Lilly, let's see what you've got for me."

Meredith came down the steps wearing a fresh shirt with her hair pulled back, smiling when she saw that Mark and Bridget had already arrived. "Hey," she said. "Thanks for coming."

"Damn, look at you. Did you really have a baby two weeks ago?" Bridget said as she walked back into the room.

"Oh. Thank you," Meredith replied, smoothing out the front of her shirt. "Breastfeeding helps. One feeding is like running five miles."

"You're still Seattle Grace's top-rated MILF. Just thought you'd like to know," Mark informed her. "By the way, this..." he said, gesturing to Lilly's outfit. "Gold stars."

"Well, it's Father's Day. I figured I could be nice to him," Meredith said, taking a seat on the couch next to Lilly, who was still lying on the cushion, contentedly sucking her thumb as she looked around. Meredith peeked into the back of her diaper and rolled her eyes playfully. "Daddy hasn't changed you yet?"

"I'm going to right now. I got sidetracked," Derek said.

"You know, technically, a godfather is kind of like a father. Today isn't just a day to celebrate Derek," Mark said. "Every other day is already a 'let's celebrate Derek' day," he teased.

Derek laughed, tossing the clean diaper at Mark. "Fine, you change her, then, since you're her godfather," he challenged.

"Fine," Mark said as he caught the diaper in mid-air before it hit his face. He looked at Lilly and paused, hesitant. "Number one?"

"Both," Derek replied, taking Mark's unopened beer and twisting off the cap. He leaned back on the couch and raised the bottle at him. "Cheers. Have fun."

Mark knelt down in front of the couch and turned Lilly toward him. "Okay, kid. Let's impress your parents," he said. He pulled off the little, white bloomers and tossed them next to her on the couch. "You seriously want me to change her on the cushion?"

Meredith shrugged. "We've done a lot worse on this couch."

"Eww, was she conceived on it?" Mark asked, opening the pack of wipes in preparation for changing her.

"Maybe," Meredith admitted, smiling at Lilly when the baby turned her head toward her upon hearing her voice. "It's okay, peanut. You can trust him."

"Of course she can. I'm her uncle," Mark said. "Is this gonna smell?"

"Oh, my God. Just change her freaking diaper before she gets a rash," Meredith laughed.

"Fine," Mark replied. He peeled off the adhesive on either side, and pulled down the front of the diaper.

Just as he grabbed a wipe and held up her legs to clean her bottom, Meredith felt the need to chime in. "Front to back," she reminded him.

"That's the second time you've told me that, Grey," Mark said, feigning offense. He shook his head at Lilly as he cleaned her. "Your mother thinks I'm a moron, Lilly."

"No, I don't. I just…" Meredith bit her lip. "I'm a mom. I can't help it."

Mark pulled out the dirty diaper from under Lilly's bottom, rolled it up, and handed it to Derek. "Here."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Thanks, Mark," he laughed.

"Well, I didn't want to put it on the sex couch," Mark shot back as he slid the fresh diaper under the baby.

"Just because we've had sex on it doesn't make it a sex couch," Meredith corrected, watching as he delicately sprinkled powder on her daughter's bottom. It wasn't often that she saw the sweet, parental side of Mark, and it made her smile.

"It kinda does," Mark upheld, fastening the sides of the diaper together. He weaved each of her legs through the bloomers and pulled it up to her waist. After readjusting her dress, he scooped her up off the couch and kissed her cheek. "All done, Lilly."

"Wow," Bridget said, her arms crossed over her chest as she stood perched behind him.

"I know. I'm impressive," he boasted, walking off into the kitchen holding Lilly, presumably to get another beer since Derek took his first one.

"Doesn't that make you want to have a baby with him?" Meredith asked Bridget. She folded up the changing mat, and picked up the pack of wipes, setting them on the end table. "He's gonna be a good dad someday."

"I know he is," Bridget said. "He's so good with Lilly. When we visited your family in New York, he was so good with all of the kids. But he's different with Lilly. I guess because she's yours. I know how close you two have always been, Derek."

Mark walked back into the living room with Lilly, and a new beer in his hand. "I know you're all in here talking about me. Don't even try to pretend you weren't," he said when the conversation landed to a halt when he approached.

"We were just complimenting your parenting skills. Well, godparenting skills, I guess," Meredith said, smiling when Mark handed Lilly to her. "Hi, peanut," she said softly. Lilly looked up at her, then curled into her chest, squishing the fabric of Meredith's shirt with her little hand.

"When can we expect a baby Sloan?" Derek asked.

"We haven't even been married for a month. Give us some time," Mark laughed before taking a swig from his bottle. "But hey, if we have a boy, he and Lilly could get married. The Shepherd-Sloan wedding. Then the four of us could be in-laws."

"What do you say, Lilly? Does that sound like a plan?" Meredith asked, looking down at the baby. Lilly yawned and stuck her thumb in her mouth. "I think Lilly's on board."

The noise of Meredith's stomach growling interrupted the conversation, and the other three turned toward her. "Damn, Grey? Hungry?"

"It's the breastfeeding. I need to shovel food into my mouth every ten minutes. I'm like a freaking battery operated machine or whatever," Meredith joked.

Derek kissed her temple before getting up off the couch. "Well, let's feed you then. Wanna start grilling?" he asked Mark.

"Yeah," Mark said, following Derek into the kitchen. He turned around and gave Meredith a thumbs up. "Your rack, though? Amazing."

Meredith shook her head amusedly at the compliment. "Thank you, Mark."'

"Did you really just say that to my wife?" Derek asked him.

"What? It's true. She could model lingerie with those things," Mark upheld.

"You probably could, Mer," Bridget admitted, picking up a pair of Lilly's booties that fell off the couch when she stood up.

Meredith looked down at her chest and smiled. "They've got a point. I could."

...

"Oh, come on! That was a strike!" Mark practically yelled at the TV.

"No, it wasn't. He didn't swing," Meredith argued, taking another bite out of her cheeseburger, the gurgling of her stomach finally settling once she ate. She licked some ketchup off her finger and laughed at the frustrated looks on both Derek's and Mark's faces. "Just because the Yankees are losing doesn't mean you need to be mopey."

"We're not being mopey," Derek said, Lilly napping in the crook of his arm.

"You totally are," Bridget laughed. "It would actually be cute if it wasn't so pathetic."

"You're not from New York. You don't get it," Mark said before shoveling a forkful of potato salad into his mouth.

Meredith took a sip of water from her glass, washing down the taste of pickles from her burger. "You're from Washington, right?" she asked Bridget.

"Born and raised. My family lives in Tacoma. I moved to Seattle after college because I got a job at Brightwater."

"That's top-notch, right?" Derek asked. "I mean, I know it's a little early to think about schools, but Lilly deserves the best."

"It's one of the top schools in the state. Preschool through eighth grade. And because Lilly is basically my niece, I'd make sure you had a spot— you know, if you wanted one."

"Is this the place five blocks from the hospital?" Meredith asked, smiling when Bridget nodded. "Then yes, we'd like a spot. Can you pencil us in three years from now?" she laughed.

"You got it," Bridget agreed, stealing a chip from Mark's plate.

"Have you two picked a date for the christening yet?" Mark asked, not peeling his eyes from the TV as a Yankee member went up to bat.

Meredith's eyes went wide and she nearly choked on her burger. "Oh, crap."

"What?" Mark asked.

"Derek's mom is coming this week. We should do it while she's here," Meredith said. "I don't want her to have to fly back out here in a month or two. And I'd rather get her baptized while we're both still on leave; otherwise, we'll never find the time to do it."

Derek smiled at her, a look of calm reassurance on his face. "Mer, it's fine. We'll figure something out."

"We don't even belong to a church, Derek. We're screwed," Meredith replied, running her fingers through her hair.

"Relax, relax. I can help," Bridget cut in. "One of my brothers is a priest. He can do it."

Meredith whipped her head toward Bridget and blinked. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. My oldest brother, Tim. He's a priest over at St. Mary's, that little chapel not too far from here. I'm sure he'd be happy to help you out."

"So, you're basically giving us an 'in' at a private school for Lilly, and providing us with a priest and a church for her baptism?" Derek clarified. He shook his head in astonishment and relief. "You have no idea how grateful I am that you married Mark."

"You should be," Mark chimed in. "Hell yeah! Home run!" He remembered the sleeping baby cradled in Derek's arm and glanced over at her, her blue eyes looking back at him. "Oops. Sorry, Lilly. Didn't mean to wake you," Mark said. "Your team just got a home run."

Meredith took Lilly from Derek so he could finish eating. "The Yankees are not your team. Uncle Mark is just spouting off nonsense," she said. "Thank you, Bridget. If I knew how to bake, I'd make you a thank you cake."

"It's no problem. I love you guys. And Lilly. I want to help," Bridget said, smiling at Lilly who yawned into Meredith's shirt. "I'll call him when Mark and I get home. I'm sure he can plan something short and sweet for this Saturday."

"Holy crap, that's six days from now," Meredith said. "Okay, uh... we can go get her a little, white dress tomorrow after we take her for her two week checkup. And while we're at the hospital, we can tell people to keep a few hours open this Saturday. That's... what else?" she asked Derek.

"That's all. We don't need to have a big party. My mom will want to cook. Stevens will volunteer her baking skills. Depending on who's working, a few people can come back to the house afterward. Lilly will be baptized. Mission: accomplished," Derek chuckled.

"When's Mom getting in?" Mark asked.

"Thursday afternoon. I'm picking her up from the airport at three," Derek replied.

"You might wanna tell her about this impromptu baptism before then," Mark suggested. "I'm sure she wants to come bearing gifts and pictures of baby Derek in his christening outfit..."

Meredith laughed. "How have I never seen those pictures?" she asked. "Yeah, you should call her."

"I will," Derek said. "And the reason you haven't seen those pictures is because they're embarrassing."

"Oh, stop," Meredith said, rolling her eyes in amusement, trailing her fingers down Lilly's back. "You were an adorable baby."

"Cute as a button," Mark smirked. "Like the boy version of Lilly. Only, you know, with a little bit of Grey tossed in the gene pool."

"She does look a lot like you when you were a baby," Meredith told Derek, kissing the top of Lilly's dark head.

"I can't wait for my mom to meet her," Derek grinned. "She's never going to put her down."

"Well, that should give you two some time to... you know," Mark hinted, failing to sound subtle in what he was implying.

"I won't even be cleared for sex for another month. There's only so much we can do, even without clothes on," Meredith said.

Derek looked over at her and raised his eyebrows suggestively. "Oh, there's plenty. And I fully intend make the most out of whatever alone time we get."

"Oh, really?" Meredith said, smiling.

"Really."

"With the way you two are, I'm surprised baby number two isn't already on the way," Mark said. "And I'm only half joking when I say that."

"Derek and I go to bed at 8:30 these days," Meredith said, glancing at Derek's watch. "Which means our bedtime is in about an hour. Even if we could have sex, I think sleep would trump the orgasm."

"Does Lilly sleep well during the night?" Bridget asked.

"Most of the time," Derek answered. "She usually only wakes up when she's hungry. But if there's a thunderstorm, forget it. May as well start breakfast, because she's not going back to sleep," he teased.

Meredith smiled at her daughter, who was starting to fall asleep, her tiny thumb tucked away in her mouth. "That's because she's a light sleeper like Derek."

"God help you when it comes to having sex then," Mark pointed out. "You two are like a porno movie, even in the on-call room."

"Bet you didn't know we had sex in the upstairs bathroom at the old house during the Christmas party," Derek said.

Mark nearly choked while taking a sip of his beer. "You what?"

"A quickie on the bathroom counter," Meredith elaborated. "See? We can be quiet."

"Your parents are unbelievable, kid. Have fun sleeping down the hall," Mark said to Lilly. "But your mom did let you wear a Yankees outfit, so I guess that makes up for their sexcapades... for today, at least."

"Home run! Up by three!" Derek cheered softly so as not to disturb Lilly. He leaned over to kiss Lilly's cheek. "My six pound good luck charm," he said.

"I guess I wouldn't mind if she were a Yankees fan," Meredith admitted. She smoothed out the ruffles on Lilly's white bloomers over her diaper and smiled at Derek. "Plus, she does look really cute in this."

Derek picked up Lilly's tiny hand and gave her a high five. "Hear that, Lilly? We have majority over Mommy now. Best Father's Day ever," he said proudly, making sure Meredith caught the smirk on his face.

"Hey, I was being nice. There's no need to gloat," Meredith laughed.

"I wasn't gloating."

Meredith smiled at him. "Whatever you say, Derek."


	110. Two Week Check Up

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. Although, that would be nice.**

**Happy (almost) July 4th to those of us in the U.S! :)  
**

The rain pounded down on the roof of the car as Derek pulled into the closest spot he could find to the front entrance of the hospital. He cut the engine, then looked over at Meredith. "How do we do this? Do we just make a run for it?" he asked, contemplating the best way to get from the car to the hospital without getting soaked with the fat rain drops that fell in sheets.

Meredith chewed on her lip, glancing to Lilly in the backseat. She sucked her thumb, watching the rain with fascination as it rolled down the window glass. "We live in Seattle. Why don't we keep a freaking umbrella in the car?" she said. "We should probably take the whole car seat in with us. I'll climb back there and unclip it from the base, then you can carry her in it. I'll grab her bag."

"Okay."

Meredith unbuckled her seat belt, then twisted around in her seat. She could feel Derek's eyes on her as she raised her ass in the air, preparing to slide her knee onto the cushion of the backseat. "Are you checking out my ass?"

"It's an inch away from my face. How can I not?" Derek asked, smiling back at her when she finally twisted around again to a sitting position next to Lilly.

"Mommy's post-birth celibacy is driving Daddy crazy, Lilly," she said, unclipping the seat from its holder. She kissed the baby's nose, then pulled the visor down to shield her from the rain. "Okay, all set."

"Alright," Derek said. He opened his door, got out, and had the backseat door opened a second later, pulling out the car seat that held Lilly and walking as carefully and quickly as he could with her to the automatic doors.

Meredith hit the lock button with Derek's keys, slung Lilly's bag and her own over her shoulder, then she ran to meet up with the two of them. Only braving the elements for mere seconds, the wet ends of her hair still dripped with rain water before the doors closed behind her. "We really need to invest in hoodies, too. Umbrellas and hoodies," she said.

"I know," Derek laughed as they walked to the elevator. He set Lilly's car seat down and pushed the up button.

Meredith knelt down to check on Lilly, pushing back the visor. She smiled in relief when she saw that at least her daughter was dry, even if they weren't. "Hi, peanut. Was that fun?" she asked. She unbuckled her, then scooped her out, along with the blanket wrapped around her. It may have been a humid June day outside, but with the cool air blasting inside the building, Meredith wasn't going to take any chances. She held Lilly close to her chest and kissed the top of her head.

"You could've kept her in there," Derek said, stepping aside once the elevator doors opened so Meredith could get on first.

"That thing weighs twenty pounds by itself. I figured I'd lighten the load," Meredith shrugged.

"Oh, yeah. All six pounds of her," Derek joked, pressing the button for the third floor.

Meredith smiled. "Shut up. She's all squishy and warm. Plus, I have mommy brain. I can't help it."

The elevator ascended, and Lilly looked around curiously at her surroundings. "This is called an elevator, Lilly. Mommy and I like elevators."

"Yes, we do," Meredith agreed. "We can't make out this time, though."

"Says who?" Derek joked.

"Says the two week old baby I'm holding," Meredith replied, rolling her eyes playfully at him.

The elevator doors parted, and they stepped off and into the hallway, making a beeline for the OB department where they were scheduled for a checkup with Dr. Halloran. They were running late already, and as much as they appreciated the oohs and aahs of the hospital staff, they didn't want to be tardy. They approached the nurses' station, and were greeted by Cynthia, one of the OB nurses.

"Hello, Dr. Grey, Dr. Shepherd," she said with a smile. "Here to see Dr. Halloran?"

"Yeah. Our daughter, Lilly, is scheduled for an eleven o'clock appointment," Derek said.

"Okay, she'll be right with you," Cynthia said. "She's adorable, by the way."

"Oh, thank you," Meredith replied, gently patting Lilly's bottom with her hand.

Dr. Halloran rounded the corner and smiled when she saw them. "Oh, good. I was just going to check to see if you were here yet. You can come on back," she said as Cynthia handed her Lilly's file.

"Okay, great," Derek said, putting his hand on the small of Meredith's back and following the doctor back to one of the exam rooms.

"So, how are you? How's Lilly doing?" Dr. Halloran asked after they entered the room. She set the file down on the counter, then washed her hands. "I see she already looks a little bigger."

"Yeah, she's had no issues with nursing," Derek said proudly. "She's such a good baby. Eats, sleeps, poops. She's amazing."

"Good, good," Dr. Halloran smiled. "Sometimes, babies have a hard time adjusting to schedules, and getting used to what the outside world is all about; but you guys seem to be handling everything remarkably well. The calmer you are, the calmer she'll be. I'm sure you notice that with her."

"We always try to keep things calm, even when we have no idea what we're doing," Meredith said, sighing amusedly. "She only cries when she needs something, and she only wakes up at night to eat."

"She's very easy breezy and laid back," Derek chimed in, smiling at Meredith. "She gets that from me."

Dr. Halloran laughed. "Well then, sounds like you two got very lucky," she said. "So, no signs of colic?"

"None. She does spit up sometimes after she eats, but that's... I mean, that's normal, right? All babies spit up," Meredith rambled, bouncing on her heels out of habit like she always did whenever she held Lilly.

"Oh, absolutely. As long as it's not every time, and she's not throwing up or showing any signs of pain, there's nothing to worry about," the doctor assured her. "How often does she eat?"

"Every three-ish hours, usually," Meredith said. "She does the whole rooting thing, and she never has problems with sucking."

"And she's not a fan of the pacifier, but she does suck her thumb," Derek said. He went to speak again, but stopped himself. "This is all normal, isn't it? And we're just sounding like obsessive new parents?" he laughed.

"Completely normal on both counts," Dr. Halloran responded. "You two are clearly very observant, which means she's well taken care of. Let's just do a little checkup, get some measurements and make sure she's on track, which I'm sure she is. We can weigh her first, if you'd like. Is her diaper dry?"

"It should be. We just changed her before we left," Meredith said, quickly peeking inside it to make sure. "All dry. Do you still want me to take it off?"

"If she's dry, we don't need to. Sometimes, wet diapers add on false ounces, and I'd like to get an accurate weigh-in," Dr. Halloran said. "Just her outfit would be fine."

Meredith nodded, lying Lilly down on the padded exam table. She pulled off her pair of pink stretch pants and then her tee shirt with a cupcake on it, leaving her in her diaper and socks. Lilly looked up at her, a puzzled expression on her face.

"You can just lay her down right here," Dr. Halloran said, gesturing to the scale.

Meredith gently laid Lilly on it, hoping she wouldn't protest. "It's okay, peanut," she said. The scale calculated Lilly's weight, and the number flashed in red letters. "Wow. Seven pounds, one ounce."

"Almost a full pound," Derek said. "Is that normal? Or should she weigh more?"

"Many babies decrease in their birth weight during the first few weeks while they learn how to eat, and their bodies get into the rhythm of digesting food, and then their weight starts to pick up again, so she's right where she should be," Dr. Halloran said as she measured her. "Eighteen and a quarter inches. So, she grew a quarter of an inch in two weeks, which is also just fine."

"Okay, good," Meredith sighed in relief.

"Fourteen inch head circumference, also right on target," Dr. Halloran recorded, along with Lilly's weight and height. She flexed Lilly's legs with her hands, and Lilly kicked them back. "Good girl. Can you grab onto my fingers?" she asked, offering Lilly both of her index fingers. Lilly wrapped her tiny hands around each, and Dr. Halloran gently pulled her up to see if Lilly could hold her head up briefly. "You're very strong, huh?"

"Yes, she is," Meredith laughed. "Her hands have an iron grip. She doesn't like to let go."

"That's good. She has strong muscle tone," Dr. Halloran said. "Does she respond to stimuli, like loud noises or voices?"

"Both," Derek said, picking her up off the scale and holding her close to his chest. "She hates thunder... a lot. And she turns her head when we talk or when the dog barks; you know, things like that."

"And she follows you with her eyes?" the doctor asked.

Meredith nodded as she wiggled Lilly's legs back into her pants while Derek held her. "Yes, she does. She's very attentive to us, the dog, other people. She was even watching the rain this morning."

"Excellent," Dr. Halloran replied, putting her stethoscope in her ears. "I'm going to take a quick listen to her heart."

"Okay," Derek said, sitting Lilly on his arm. The doctor pressed the stethoscope to Lilly's chest and listened for a few moments, nodding in approval. "Very good. Around 140 beats per minute. Lungs sound good, too. Any signs of sleep apnea?"

"No," Derek said, while Meredith weaved Lilly's arms back through her tee shirt. "She's a good sleeper, too."

"She's sleeping with us, still. But don't worry, we have one of those safe sleeper things," Meredith said.

"Oh, that's fine. A lot of babies prefer closeness, especially to their parents. So if it helps her sleep, I don't see a problem," Dr. Halloran said. "How about her digestion?"

"Yes; we always make sure to keep track. She hasn't had any problems with constipation or anything. Everything that goes in comes out," Meredith said.

"Okay, great," Dr. Halloran nodded.

"So she's perfect, just like we thought?" Derek chuckled, kissing the top of Lilly's head.

"Yes, she is," Dr. Halloran agreed. She smiled at Lilly. "I didn't realize how blue her eyes are. She's a beautiful baby."

Meredith smiled. "Thank you."

"Do you two have any questions for me?" the doctor asked.

"I don't think so," Meredith said, looking to Derek. "Do you?"

"No, I think we're good," Derek replied.

"Okay, then. Meredith, I'll see you in four weeks for your six week checkup. But just briefly, how have you been? Any cramping or bleeding still? Anything?" she asked.

"There was for the first few days after we came home, but not since then. I feel fine now," Meredith said.

"Okay, good," Dr. Halloran nodded. "And there's been no sexual activity since the birth, correct?" she asked.

"No, none," Meredith said, shaking her head. "It's been hard for him, I'm sure, but we—" she stopped herself, putting her hand over her mouth. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to sound dirty. I just meant that we, uh, no. We haven't. We haven't had sex."

Derek pursed his lips, trying to bite back a laugh. "Nope, no intercourse," he echoed.

"Okay, just making sure," Dr. Halloran said with a smile. "So I'll see Lilly again in six weeks for her eight week checkup," she said as she finished taking down notes in Lilly's patient file.

"Okay," Meredith said.

"It's great to see you again. You too, Lilly," Dr. Halloran said, gently shaking Lilly's hand. "Feel free to call any time if you have questions or concerns."

"We will," Derek said. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," the doctor said. She closed Lilly's file and stepped out of the room, leaving them alone.

"Really? It's been hard for me?" Derek asked with a grin on his face.

Meredith shot him a look as she fixed Lilly's headband. "Shut up," she said. "I wasn't talking about your penis."

"Porny."

"Your dad is twelve," Meredith told Lilly, kissing her forehead before taking her into her own arms. She draped the bags over her shoulder. "Ready?"

Derek picked up the car seat. "Yeah," he said. He opened the door and let Meredith leave first, following behind her. They rounded the corner on their way back to the elevators. When they got there, the door was open, and they quickly got on so they wouldn't have to wait for it to make its way through all the floors before it reached them again.

Owen stood there in a bloodied trauma gown, smiling in surprise when he saw the three of them. "Hey. Haven't seen you in a while," he said, smiling at Lilly. "So this is the baby I see on my fridge every morning," he laughed. "Even more beautiful in person."

"On the fridge?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah, Cristina put a picture of her on there. One of her nursery ones. She calls Lilly her little protégé," Owen said. "I would ask to hold her if I wasn't all blood-splattered. Rain check?"

"You got it," Derek chuckled. "Big trauma downstairs?"

"Multiple MVCs. It's a mess. I was just coming up here to make sure some ORs were freed up. You know how it is; if you don't do it in person, the nurses ignore you. Hey, if you've got a minute, do you think you could come down to the pit and do a consult? I know you're on leave, but I'd really like a second opinion on some head CTs," Owen asked.

Derek looked at Meredith and she nodded. "Leave or not, you're still the fancy neuro god. Go. I'll just hang out in the cafeteria. It's lunchtime anyway," she said.

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," she said, kneeling down to put Lilly back into her car seat. The elevator doors opened and she grunted as she picked up the car seat, both bags slung over her shoulder. "Mommy's getting a workout today, Lilly," she said. She smiled at them. "Just call me when you're done," she told Derek.

"Are you sure you're okay with holding all that?" Derek asked again.

George walked past the elevator just as Meredith was getting off, and he stopped when he saw her. "Hey," he said.

"George is here. He'll help," Meredith laughed. "Go. Have fun."

"Okay. Love you," Derek said as the elevator doors shut again.

"Hi, you," George said in his baby voice as he knelt down to see Lilly. He rubbed his finger over her cheek and smiled. "You look just like your mommy," he told her.

"You think so?" Meredith asked. "Most people say she looks like Derek."

"Him, too. But yeah, there's definitely lots of you in her," George said. "Where are you headed?"

"Cafeteria while Derek does a consult," Meredith said.

"Oh, good. I'm going there now," George said, picking up the car seat. "Did she have her checkup today?"

"Yeah. She's perfect. And she didn't even cry," Meredith said proudly as they walked into the cafeteria.

Izzie flagged them down as soon as she saw them, waving them towards the table where she, Alex and Cristina were seated. "Hey. What are you doing here?" Izzie asked.

"Lilly's checkup was today, and Owen asked Derek for a consult, which is actually good, because now I can talk to all of you," Meredith said, taking a seat at the table. "Thank you for carrying her, George."

"No problem," George replied, unbuckling Lilly from her car seat and picking her up. He sat down next to Meredith, a curious Lilly looking at each of their faces.

"Talk to us about what?" Cristina asked, biting into her sandwich.

"Lilly's baptism is this Saturday, which I know is really short notice," Meredith began before Izzie cut her off.

"This Saturday? As in the 25th?" Izzie clarified.

Meredith bit her lip. "Yeah."

"I guess I should take off that day, then?" Cristina asked.

"Well, you're her godmother, so I'd appreciate that," Meredith laughed, smiling when she saw George making faces at Lilly.

Izzie smoothed out a clean napkin and clicked her pen. "Alright, what time is this, and what should I bring?" she asked, ready to take down notes.

"It's at ten, and you don't need to bring anything," Meredith answered. "Derek and I are ordering food, and his mom wants to help. She's flying in this week."

"Well, I need to bring _something_," Izzie insisted. "How about a cookie tray?"

"That would be great. Thank you," Meredith said to appease her.

"Why so soon?" George asked.

Meredith shrugged. "We just didn't want Derek's mom to have to fly out again in a few weeks. Plus, when I go back to work, it might be harder to plan it. So while we have time, we just figured we'd do it now. So, yay or nay? Head count?"

They all raised their hands, and Meredith smiled. "This is why I love all of you. Thank you," she said.

"Of course we'll be there," Izzie said, reaching for Lilly as George regretfully handed her over. "Does she have a dress?"

"Derek and I are going to the store when we're done here. We're not getting her anything frilly; just a little, white sundress, that way she can at least wear it again," Meredith said. "No muss, no fuss. Just getting her baptized. It's not going to take very long."

Alex laughed. "At an actual church?" he asked.

"Yeah. One of Bridget's brothers is a priest over at St. Mary's, so we're just going there," Meredith said, looking to Cristina. "You and Mark just need to recite some stuff, saying that if Derek and I die, you two are in charge."

"Oh, I'd get her," Cristina replied, licking the lid of her pudding cup.

"Sloan might fight you for that," Alex pointed out.

"I already called dibs as godmother to the next kid. So at some point, you two need to have another one," Izzie said, letting Lilly look over her shoulder.

"One day, I promise. You know, once I'm actually allowed to have sex again," Meredith said, stealing a fry off of George's plate. "By the way, if you happen to see Dr. Halloran, let me know, so I can avert eye contact."

"Why, what happened?" George asked.

"I made an erection joke by accident," Meredith said, sighing. "I guess my subconscious mind is horny, even if I'm not."

"Really? I thought you'd be bouncing off the walls by now. You two are so used to going at it twenty-four-freaking-seven," Alex joked.

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, well, not so much with a newborn. I mean, Lilly is a good sleeper, but not 'eight hours straight' good. Between the diapers and laundry and breastfeeding, I'm exhausted. Not that I would change any of it. I love Lilly so much."

"On the upside to the exhaustion, your boobs look awesome," Alex complimented, earning him a nudge in the side from Izzie. "What? It's the truth."

"You should totally wear something low-cut to this baptism... show off your assets while you have them," Cristina said.

"Yeah, I'll be sure to do that," Meredith said as she rolled her eyes playfully. "After we find something for Lilly, I have to scour my closet for something that doesn't make me look like a porn star. A few days ago, I put on one of my tank tops, and Derek asked me where the stripper pole was. He loves them."

"Of course he does," Cristina said.

"Oh, can one of you let Lexie know the baptism plan? And Bailey?" Meredith asked. "That reminds me, I need to call my dad. And I'll have Derek call the Chief."

"Does Shepherd's mom know about this?" Alex asked, smiling at Lilly when she looked at him.

"Yeah, Derek called her last night, then she spent the next hour reminiscing with him about his own baptism. She's so excited to meet Lilly," Meredith said.

"So you're not freaking out over the impending mommy visit?" Cristina asked.

Meredith shook her head. "No. I love his mom. And I especially love that she'll insist on me taking a nap. Probably multiple naps. And I know she's going to kick Derek and me out of the house and make us go out to dinner or something. Not sure how I feel about that. I've never been away from Lilly. Ever," she said.

"I'm sure you could survive for an hour or two. You should go and have fun," Izzie encouraged as she patted Lilly's bottom.

"Lilly is fun," Meredith said.

"A pooping, crying infant is actually fun to hang out with?" Cristina asked, sipping on her straw.

Meredith cocked her head at her friend. "That pooping, crying infant is your goddaughter. And yes, she is. Diapers, baths, all of it. A few years ago, I was totally anti-motherhood. And now, it's like I don't know what I would do without her."

"Oh, God. You're a full-blown mommy, Mer. It's a miracle, Lilly," Izzie said, speaking to Lilly who turned her head toward Izzie's chest and nuzzled her face into her scrub top. Izzie laughed. "I've got boobs, sweetie; just not the kind of boobs you need."

Meredith felt along her chest, which was starting to feel heavy. "I should probably go feed her before Derek gets done," she said, taking Lilly when Izzie handed her back over. "Thanks for agreeing to come to the baptism, too. I know it's short notice."

"Of course we'll be there," George said. He waved to Lilly after Meredith strapped her back into her car seat. "I'll see you on Saturday. You're gonna look so cute."

"As long as I can find her a dress in time, I think we're in good shape," she laughed, putting the bags on her shoulder and picking up Lilly's car seat. "Ugh," Meredith grunted. "That's the last time I take the car seat out of the car."

"Need some help?" Alex asked.

"No, I got it. Thanks," Meredith said. She waved at them with her free hand. "See you guys later."

"If you need any help with the baptism, call me!" Izzie said as Meredith trudged out of the cafeteria with Lilly.

Meredith turned around and smiled. "I'm gonna hold you to that, you know."

...

The noise of Lilly nursing was the only sound coming from the attending lounge. Unlike the resident lounge, constantly strewn with people constantly coming in and out, this place was quieter. With most of the attendings down in the pit, Meredith decided it would be best to nurse there. And given that Derek had the keys in his pocket, and hers were at home, she was locked out of his office. Rather than bother him, she granted herself access, took a yogurt from the mini-fridge, and sank down onto the plush leather couch.

Lilly nursing in her left arm, and her snack on the end table, Meredith carefully leaned over the armrest of the couch and spooned some of the mixed berry yogurt into her mouth. "I hope this was Daddy's, Lilly. I mean, really, who else would eat non-fat, probiotic yogurt but him?" she said as she read the label.

The door handle clicked open, and Meredith turned around, smiling in relief when she saw that it was Derek, but it dissolved when she saw Mark trailing behind him. "Crap," she said, trying to cover herself.

"Whoa," Mark said, covering his eyes when he realized she was nursing. "I didn't see anything."

"My boob is out. Of course you did," Meredith countered.

Derek rummaged through Lilly's bag and pulled out a blanket, gently draping it over Meredith's shoulder to shield her. "Sorry. I didn't know you'd be nursing," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"You knew I was in here?" Meredith asked.

"I knew you didn't have your keys, so you couldn't get into my office. I figured you might be," Derek said.

Mark kept his head averted as he walked over to the other side of the room. "Just getting some coffee. I won't look," he promised.

Meredith laughed. "Too late now, the damage is done. Do you have to go into surgery?" she asked Derek.

"No, Nelson and a few other neuro guys are gonna take care of it. Lots of close head injuries, but nothing they can't handle," Derek said.

"Okay. Oh, and I talked to everyone. They can come on Saturday."

"Good," Derek nodded. "I saw Richard in the elevator on the way up here. He and Adele can make it, too."

"How dressed up do I have to get for this?" Mark asked before taking a sip of his coffee.

"A suit would be nice," Meredith said.

Mark pursed his lips in thought. "I don't have to color coordinate with Yang, do I?"

"This isn't a prom, Mark," Derek laughed. "She doesn't have to pin a corsage on you or anything."

"Well, I just wanted to make sure, so I wasn't forever known as the guy who ruined Lilly's christening pictures by showing up wearing the wrong tie," Mark defended, taking a seat on the opposite couch. "By the way, what color tie should I wear?"

"As long as it's not neon or polka dot, I don't care," Meredith shrugged.

"How about blue? Everyone likes blue, right?" Mark asked.

Derek laughed. "Blue is fine."

Lilly pulled off Meredith's breast and looked up at her, a peaceful expression on her face. As she was mid-yawn, she stretched out her tiny limbs, shaking off her sleepiness. Meredith smiled at her. "Hey, Lillybug. All done?"

"I'll burp her, then we can go," Derek offered while Meredith covertly fixed her shirt under the blanket he had draped over her shoulder. After she tugged her shirt back down, Meredith handed Lilly to him, and he kissed her cheek. "Hi, beautiful. Can you burp for me?" he asked, holding Lilly to his chest so that her chin rested on his shoulder.

"Where are you headed after this?" Mark asked.

"We need to get Lilly a dress for Saturday. Nothing with frills and no pantyhose," Meredith said, eating another spoonful of yogurt. "She's only going to wear it for a few hours. I want her to be comfortable. And pantyhose are not comfortable."

"Mer usually skips the pantyhose when we need to get dressed up for something. It's easier that way," he said with a grin, looking over at her as he patted Lilly's back.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "I'm not wearing pantyhose to this either. And I'm off sex for another month, so don't think you're getting lucky."

"If you two want to have some naked time, I don't have to be in surgery for a half hour. I could take Lilly. You could go into Derek's office, have some 'above the belt' fun on that pull-out couch..." Mark suggested.

"That's very sweet, but— " Derek said before Meredith interrupted him.

"Are you serious?" Meredith asked.

"Wouldn't have offered if I wasn't," Mark said.

Meredith turned to Derek and bit her lip, and he raised his eyebrows at her. "Wait, _you're_ serious, too?" he asked.

"I mean, he offered. Think about it. Thirty minutes, with no threat of pending diapers or crying," Meredith tried to cajole him. She smiled at Lilly. "Not that we mind, of course."

"Yeah?"

"We could," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "Alright, then. We'll take you up on that," he told Mark, getting up off the couch. He kissed Lilly's head, then handed her to Mark. "Don't worry, Lilly. You're in good hands. Can you finish burping her?"

Meredith shuffled through Lilly's bag and grabbed a burp cloth. "She doesn't normally spit up, but keep this handy just in case," she said. "Try to get three or four. Walk around if you have to."

"Tick tock," Mark said, already burping Lilly over his shoulder.

"Okay, we're going," Derek said. He put his hand on the small of Meredith's back and they walked toward the door. "You sure you don't mind?"

"She's my niece. We're fine. Now go, get your non-sex freak on," Mark replied.

"Thank you, Mark. We love you, Lilly. We'll be back," Meredith said, giggling when Derek took her hand and led her out into the hall.

The door clicked shut behind them and Mark sighed. "Your parents are like horny teenagers, kid. Ooh, good one," he said, smiling when he heard her burp. "My guess is, you'll have a new sibling before they potty train you."


	111. Mama Shep Arrives

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Thanks for your continued patience, as always!  
**

Meredith pulled a wet, squirmy Lilly from her tub next to the sink, wrapping her in a towel. "There. All clean," she said, holding Lilly against her. "Daddy is going to be home any minute with your grandma, so we need to get you dressed."

She walked down the hall and into Lilly's nursery. She opened the closet door, surveying the plethora of outfits her daughter had, which probably exceeded hers and Derek's combined, by double. "How about this one?" Meredith said, taking a tiny dress covered in strawberries from the hanger. "I think your Aunt Amy sent this. Or maybe it was your Aunt Nancy. I don't know. It was one of Daddy's sisters."

After laying Lilly down on the changing table, Meredith patted her dry, then reached for a fresh diaper. "Grandma is going to love you, Lilly. She'll probably want to hold you the whole time. And kick Daddy and me out the door to have some alone time; but don't worry, you're in perfectly capable hands. I mean, she did raise Daddy, so she obviously knows what she's doing," Meredith said as she fastened the sides of the diaper. She slipped the dress over Lilly's head, weaved her arms through the holes, and pulled it down over her belly.

"And she'll be pleased to see the Shepherd hair you inherited in person," Meredith said, gently combing her fingers through the baby's damp hair and securing a tuft of it into a green bow. "Very pretty."

The key turned in the lock downstairs and the front door opened. "Mer, we're home!" Derek called.

Meredith picked Lilly up off the changing table and patted her diapered bottom. "Okay, peanut. Let's go." She walked down the stairs, Lilly in her arm.

As soon as Derek's mom saw the baby, she gasped, in awe of her tiniest, new grandchild. "Oh, Meredith. She's so beautiful," Linda said, pulling a tissue from her purse and dabbing under her eyes. She held out her arms. "May I?"

"Oh, yeah. Of course," Meredith said, gently handing Lilly to her.

Linda cradled Lilly close to her chest, running her finger over the baby's soft cheek. "Hi, Lilly. I'm your grandma. You know, you look so much like your Daddy did when he was a baby," she said.

"She does," Meredith agreed. "I just stare at her, and I see so much Derek."

Derek snaked his arm around Meredith's waist and kissed her temple. "What do you think, Ma? Pretty perfect, isn't she?"

"Perfect, just like I knew she would be." Linda leaned down and kissed Lilly's forehead. "I love you, sweetheart."

"Why don't we head into the living room? I'll get us some drinks. Mom, are you hungry?" Derek asked.

"No, no; I'm fine, honey," Linda replied, sitting down on the couch. "Get something for Meredith, though. She needs to keep up her energy. And she's still so tiny. Derek, are you feeding her enough?"

Meredith laughed. "Yes, he does. Believe me. It's actually annoying."

"I annoy because I care," Derek said as he walked out of the room and into the kitchen.

"I can't believe she's finally here. The tenth niece in the family. And my son's first child," Linda said, not taking her eyes off of Lilly, who was looking up at her curiously. "You know, I was never sure if Derek would ever have kids. He's always wanted a family, but then when..."

"I know," Meredith nodded, looking down at her lap. She smiled at her daughter. "It took Derek and me a long time to... but everything worked out like it was supposed to. And now that Lilly's here..."

"It changes your whole life. Everything you do now, you do for your kids. The day I gave birth to Kathleen, that was it. She was why Jim and I worked so hard to give her the best life we could. And it was the same when the Nancy, Derek, Liz and Amy were born. I poured everything I had into them to make sure they turned into good people."

"I always knew Derek would be a good dad, but to see him with Lilly, it's... when I nurse her at night, he gets up with me. Most men would probably roll over and go back to sleep. But he doesn't. He gets up every time, and then he'll burp her. If she wakes up early in the morning, Derek will take her downstairs so I can sleep in. He's just... believe me, you raised a good man," Meredith said.

Linda took Meredith's hand and squeezed it. "Thank you."

"Iced tea and a bag of pretzels," Derek announced as he walked back into the living room. He set the drink tray and the snack bag down on the table, then sat down on the adjoining couch. "I didn't want to make anything, because I figured I could cook later," he said.

"Oh, we have plenty of time to cook. Tonight, how about the two of you go out? I'd be more than happy to watch Lilly," Derek's mom said, smiling at Meredith when she handed her one of the glasses of iced tea.

Meredith shook her head. "You don't have to do that. This is supposed to be your vacation."

"Lilly is my granddaughter. Nothing would make me happier than getting to spend some time with her. Besides, I'm sure you two haven't had a night out to yourselves in a while," Linda insisted.

Derek glanced over at Meredith, giving her a look that said _'There's no way we're getting out of this, so we may as well just give in.'_ Meredith shrugged back at him in approval. "Okay, we'll go out. As long as you don't mind."

"We won't be long. An hour, tops," Meredith said.

"Please, take as long as you want. I'm used to wrangling at least ten grandkids on a weekly basis. One night with one granddaughter is a piece of cake," Linda assured them, rocking Lilly in her arm. "So, Derek tells me she's a good sleeper?"

"Yeah, we got pretty lucky," Meredith said. "She's not fussy, and she only wakes up at night when she's hungry or needs a new diaper. She does wake up early, though; something she got from Derek."

"Derek never slept late as a baby. When he was old enough, he would climb out of the crib and toddle into our bed. Sometimes, he would just go downstairs and help himself to breakfast," Linda laughed. "One time, I found him eating cereal off the kitchen floor after he spilled the box. None of the girls ever did that, only him. He liked keeping me on my toes."

"I was the only boy. I wanted to make life more interesting," Derek joked.

"You were such a sweet boy. After two girls, we thought for sure we'd be having another daughter. But then when the doctor pointed to the little penis on the screen, we were so thrilled," Linda recalled, smiling at her son.

Derek sighed, dropping his head into his hands. "You know, I've heard that story a thousand times, and it never gets less mortifying."

"What? I'm your mother. Meredith's your wife. Don't be embarrassed," his mom said. "So, how long until my grandson is born?"

"That depends. Is one of my sisters pregnant?" Derek asked, smiling amusedly at his mother.

"From us? Uh, two years... ish. That's the tentative plan, anyway. I think we've got a pretty good handle on this parenting thing so far, but we'll see," Meredith said.

"Until then, you can nag Mark about giving you another grandchild," Derek said.

"How is he doing? Is he excited to be a godfather?" Linda asked.

Derek nodded. "Yeah. He already has his suit ironed and a tie picked out. You should see how he is with Lilly. I swear, he loves her as much as we do."

"She's very easy to love. I never want to put her down," Derek's mom said, holding Lilly to her chest and kissing the top of her head. "Do you have everything ready for Saturday? I can cook anything, just say the word."

"All we need to make are the appetizers. We're ordering the rest," Derek said. "We didn't have you fly across the country to cook."

"Fine, but I do want to take advantage of grandma time with my Lilly. So, why don't you two go get ready? I want you to have as much time as you want," Linda offered.

"Okay, I'll go feed her while you two catch up, then we'll get dressed," Meredith promised, actually getting excited at the prospect of a few hours alone with her husband, though she knew leaving the house without Lilly would test her strength.

Linda hugged Lilly once more before handing her back to Meredith. "Okay, that sounds good," she said. "Take your time, honey."

"We'll be back," Meredith said, smiling at both of them as she walked toward the stairs.

Derek moved to the place on the other couch where Meredith had been sitting. "Just admit it, Lilly's the greatest of all the grandkids," he said with a grin, taking a sip of his drink.

"I love all of them equally. But she's definitely the tiniest," Linda said, reaching for her son's hand. "She's beautiful, Derek. I'm so proud of you and Meredith. I know Dad would be, too."

"Yeah," Derek said softly. "I know he died a long time ago, but it's still hard, especially now that Lilly's here. I love Lilly and Mer so much. I can't imagine not being here, or Meredith having to raise her alone. You know, it makes me appreciate everything you did. After Dad died, you just stepped up and raised all five of us. And you never complained or felt sorry for yourself. You just... did it."

"That's what you do when you're a parent. Your children always come first. There are days when I could barely pull myself out of bed, but I did, because I loved you and your sisters as much as you and Meredith love Lilly."

"Every night, we just stare at her. We can't believe she's ours, that we made a person. When she was born, our lives became about her. She makes everything else seem unimportant," Derek said.

"That's how it is for the rest of your life," Linda told him, kissing his temple.

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulders and she leaned into him. "Good."

...

"This is a mistake. We shouldn't go," Meredith said as she stood in her bra and panties, sifting through her closet for something to wear. "My boobs are humongous, and more importantly, what if Lilly needs them? I haven't started pumping yet. She might—"

Derek cut off her rambling with a kiss, cupping her cheeks in his hands and pressing his lips against hers. "She'll be just fine. We're only gonna be gone for an hour or two. She won't even know we left," he said, smiling at her. "Come on, it'll be fun. I already called ahead at Camparo's. Bread sticks, fettuccine alfredo, chocolate mousse..."

Meredith groaned. "Damn you."

"What?"

"You know Italian food is my weakness," Meredith said, tugging on a dress sleeve in her closet and scrunching her nose at it. "And you used that against me."

Derek smirked at her as he buttoned his shirt. "Why do you think I picked Camparo's?"

"I was thinking we could just swing by the Taco Bell drive-thru and come right back home," Meredith said.

"No more Taco Bell. It's bad enough you craved it for nine months when you were pregnant," Derek laughed. "I requested an outdoor table on the porch, with the band and the lights. Remember how romantic that was the first time we went there, and we came home and had sex all night long?"

"Okay, you sold me," Meredith sighed, trying to hold back her smile. "I'm just nervous about leaving Lilly. I mean, obviously I trust your mom. But still, it's just weird."

"I know. It's weird for me, too. But if Lilly could talk, I think she'd tell us to go have a fun night out," Derek said. He put his hands on her hips and pulled her to him. When he started kissing her neck, she moaned.

She tilted her head to the side and closed her eyes. "Hmm, Derek," Meredith whispered. When she felt her insides getting all fluttery, she pulled back.

"What?"

"Stupid sex ban. I'm getting all turned on. But your mom is downstairs, and my legs are closed to you for four more weeks," Meredith said as she tried to drive away the fuzzy sex cloud hovering over her. "We should probably stop."

"Okay," Derek agreed.

Meredith bit her lip, watching as he reached for his dress pants. Before she knew what she was doing, she took them from his hand and tossed them onto the bed. "Screw it. Just because we can't have sex-sex doesn't mean we can't do... other things," she decided, inching him back onto the bed.

Derek looked up at her and smiled. "Yeah? What kinds of things?"

"Naked things," Meredith said innocently, reaching around and unhooking her bra. She straddled his waist and kissed him. "Maybe one of your favorite things?"

"Hmm, which one?" he asked, but when her hand snaked into his boxers, he sucked in a breath. "Okay, yeah. Let's go with that one."

Meredith laughed. "We need to be fast, or we're going to be late," she said, running her fingers over his groin.

He arched his back toward her and stifled a moan of his own. "Yeah, that's not gonna be a problem."

Fifteen minutes later, Meredith stood in front of the mirror, adjusting her dark purple sundress. "Does this look okay?" she asked Derek, who was putting on his belt.

"You look beautiful," he said, walking up behind her.

Meredith smirked at him in the mirror. "Are you just saying that because I just... you know what?"

"Mer, look at yourself. If I wasn't the one who put the baby inside you, I wouldn't know you had a baby two weeks ago," he laughed.

"My boobs look okay?" she asked. "They're not all smushy?"

Derek kissed her shoulder. "They look amazing. _You_ look amazing."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled, reaching for her lip gloss. As she was applying it, she froze. "Crap. Lilly's bath soap. We didn't leave it on the counter. How can your mom give her a bath if she has no bath soap?"

Derek gently tugged on her arm as she made a beeline for the hallway. "Mer, relax. I'll get it and put it next to the tub."

"And her bath towel. Her yellow duck one is in the closet," Meredith said.

"Okay."

Meredith grabbed her purse off the armchair in the corner of the room and followed him out into the hall. "Bath stuff, pajamas, diapers. Is that all your mom will need?"

"Yeah. And if she needs anything else, she'll find it," Derek assured her as they walked into the bathroom. He knelt down and took the bath soap from the closet, then Lilly's towel. "All set," he said, putting the items on the counter next to Lilly's tub.

Meredith let out a breath, nodding. "Okay. I think we're ready."

"You didn't even freak out this much when you were giving birth," Derek teased her, putting his hand on the small of her back before they walked down the stairs. "Eyes on the prize. Chocolate mousse."

"Shut up."

"Don't you both look wonderful," Linda complimented as she sat on the couch with Lilly, who was peacefully sucking her thumb.

"Thank you," Meredith replied. "So all of her bath stuff is upstairs in the bathroom. Diapers are in the bin right over there, and upstairs, too. Oh, and her wipes and powder. She doesn't need a lot of powder, just a sprinkle or two. Extra clothes are, well, everywhere."

"We'll be fine, I promise," Linda said, smiling at both of them. "Between five children and sixteen grandchildren, I've given about a thousand baths, and changed twice as many diapers. There's nothing to worry about. Just go out and have a fun time."

Linda handed Lilly to Derek and he smiled. "Thanks, Mom."

"We'll be back soon, peanut," Meredith said. "Have fun with Grandma, okay?"

"Oh, we will. Ask any of your cousins, I'm a fun grandma," Linda laughed.

"She really is, Lilly," Derek affirmed, handing her to Meredith.

Meredith hugged Lilly close to her chest and kissed her forehead. "We love you."

Derek glanced down at his watch. "We should get going, Mer."

"Yeah, we should," Meredith agreed, handing Lilly back to her mother-in-law.

"I know you won't, but if you need anything, just call," Derek told his mom as he took his keys and wallet off the table.

"Have fun. And don't call to check up on me," Linda warned them both playfully. She opened the front door and nearly ushered them out. "Now go, before either of you change your minds."

"We're going," Derek said, stepping behind Meredith out the door.

"Bye," Meredith waved. "Bye, Lillybug."

They walked to the car parked in the driveway, and Meredith twirled her bracelet around her wrist while she waited for Derek to unlock the door. "Chocolate mousse. Chocolate mousse. Chocolate mousse," she repeated softly to herself.

Derek overheard her chanting the mantra, and he couldn't help but laugh. "Mer..."

"The hormone carnival hasn't packed up and left my body yet," Meredith told him. "Seriously, unlock the door before I run back into the house."

"Unlocked," Derek said as he he pressed the button on the key fob.

"Damn you."

"Pretty sure that's the second time you've said that to me in the past hour."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Yes, well, you deserve it."

...

Meredith slathered butter on her dinner roll and shoved a bite into her mouth. "I know this is really bad," she said as she chewed, "but I don't care because I'll burn it all off when I nurse Lilly when we get home. Breastfeeding is amazing." She looked at Derek across the table and smiled at him. "I'm glad you made us come here."

"Actually, my mom actually made us come."

"Yeah, well, your mom is kind of awesome," she said, forking a piece of chicken from his plate. "Oh, by the way, the hospital called today while you were picking up your mom to schedule my follow-up appointment. And I hinted around at coming in after five weeks instead of six, and the nurse I talked to said that was fine," Meredith said excitedly.

"Really?"

"Yeah, so I got an appointment for the eleventh, which means I'll get the all clear the day before our anniversary," she said.

Derek grinned at her. "So we get to have hot anniversary sex?"

"Yes, we do," she said, smiling back at him. "I know I said the waiting is fun, but I mean, six weeks is... it's a long time. And not to be porny, but I miss getting laid on a daily basis."

"Alright, then. Can't wait for July 12th," he chuckled, taking a bite from his salad. "What about Lilly?"

"Izzie already volunteered to watch her overnight, but I don't know. I don't mind pumping. Once I go back to work, I'll have to start anyway. I'm just worried about how she'll be. Do you think she'd be okay?"

"Yeah. It's just one night. Izzie and Alex are more than capable. Plus, Lilly's still so little. She won't care," he shrugged. "But when she's two or three? We might have more of a problem. I say if she offered, we take her up on it."

"I guess," Meredith agreed. "Does that make us bad parents? Leaving her overnight so we can have uninterrupted sex?"

"No, that makes us two horny, sex-deprived adults who are leaving their baby with a very dependable, very caring married couple for one night," Derek amended before sipping from his glass of iced tea. "How was that? Convincing?"

"Pretty good."

"Yeah?"

"You're very good at that," Meredith said as she twirled some pasta on her fork and shoveled it into her mouth. "Mmm." She gave him a thumbs up and nodded while she chewed.

"See? If fettuccine alfredo is making you moan like that, just imagine how great uninterrupted anniversary sex will be," Derek said.

Meredith shook her head as she swallowed. "I was _not_ moaning."

"I know all of your sex noises. Believe me, that was a sex noise," Derek upheld, popping a crouton into his mouth.

"Whatever. Think of that as a preview for our anniversary," Meredith said. She reached across the table and put her hand over his. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"We needed a night out. And I never would've agreed if you didn't want to," Meredith admitted.

"Tell you what, how about we schedule a date night for ourselves every week, whether we go out or not. After Lilly is asleep, just time for the two of us. Dinner at home, a movie on the couch, a bath, anything. Some husband and wife time," Derek said, running his thumb across the back of her hand.

She bit her lip and smiled at him. "I'd like that."

"You know, it's only 8:30. We told my mom we'd me home by ten."

Meredith licked some sauce off her finger, laughing. "Uh huh. What are you suggesting?"

"Thanking you for earlier. I know I owe you one or two sexual rain checks, so if you'd like to cash in..." Derek hinted, raising his eyebrows at her.

"You mean some non-sex activities in the backseat of the car?" she asked before her smile turned into a frown. "Wait, Lilly's car seat is back there. That's just wrong."

"Good thing you're still as flexible as you were when we met," he said with a smirk. "The passenger seat works just as well as the backseat."

"I'm in, as long as we don't get caught this time," Meredith said. "Years later, and I'm still slightly mortified that Bailey saw me naked. Oh, and the Chief that time at the trailer." She looked around the cluster of tables near them. "This probably isn't appropriate restaurant conversation."

"That's okay. We're leaving soon, anyway," he pointed out, finishing off the last of his chicken.

"Chocolate mousse first. Inappropriate car nakedness second," Meredith reminded him.

Derek politely waived their waiter over to their table when he saw him nearby. "Choosing dessert over naked time with me. That feels good," he joked.

Meredith looked at him unapologetically. "I did dirty things to you with Lilly and your mom right downstairs. Consider chocolate mousse my orgasm," she said, blushing when she realized she said that in front of their waiter who had approached their table. "Crap."

"Does this top Bailey catching us in your driveway in my car?" Derek asked, amused.

She pursed her lips, refusing to make eye contact their their waiter. "Pretty damn close."


	112. Lilly's Baptism

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show, but I met Patrick last weekend. That has to count for something, right? ;)  
**

Lilly laid in her boppy seat on her parents' bed, contentedly watching them while they got ready for her baptism. Her big blue eyes followed them as they moved about the bedroom, tiny thumb in its usual place in her mouth. She looked at Derek when he spoke.

"Blue shirt or white?" he asked Meredith, holding up both options on separate hangers.

"Blue. Always blue. It brings out your eyes," Meredith smiled at him. She turned around so Derek could zip the back of her turquoise sundress, something she bought right before she'd gotten pregnant, and had been waiting to wear for months. "Is it weird that we have a daughter, but we're both wearing blue to her baptism?"

Derek chuckled as he easily zipped her dress. "Well, it would be kinda tacky if we both wore pink," he said. "We can wear pink to our future son's baptism."

"That would be even tackier," Meredith said.

"Which tie? Gray or navy and white?" Derek asked, putting one against his shirt, then the other.

"Navy and white. And since when am I your fashion adviser?" she laughed as she sat on the bed to put on her heels.

"You have good fashion sense. I trust your word," he replied. "You picked Lilly's dress and she looks gorgeous."

"Of course she—" Meredith paused when she looked at Lilly sitting next to her. "Oh, crap."

Derek turned around. "What?"

"Lilly's making her poop face, and she's already dressed. If she gets poop on her white dress, we're screwed," Meredith said, reaching for the baby. "I'll pick her up, and you pull the dress over her head."

"Okay," Derek said. He gently pulled the little, white sundress over Lilly's head, leaving her in her diaper and lacy bloomers. He pulled the bloomers off, too, and set her clothes on the bed. "Sorry, princess. We can't risk a poop emergency, not on baptism day," he said, kissing her forehead.

Meredith kissed her, too, then laid her back down. "Sorry to disturb you. Carry on, Lilly."

Lilly looked at her with scrunched eyebrows, and balled up her tiny fists, and Meredith giggled. "I can't tell if that's her grumpy face, or her poop face."

Derek smiled at his daughter. "A little of both."

"Do you think she'll cry when they pour water on her? Should we bring a towel?" Meredith asked.

"It's only a little water. She can just wipe it on Mark's suit if it's bothering her," Derek joked as he put on his black dress shoes. "Besides, she loves the tub. She'll be fine."

"Yeah, I guess she'll be okay," Meredith agreed, rolling on some colored lip gloss, then tossing it into her purse. She noticed Lilly was back to sucking her thumb, a relaxed expression on her face. "All done?"

"You wanna change her, or do you want me to?" Derek asked.

"I'll do it. I don't mind," Meredith shrugged. "Can you hand me her diaper stuff?"

He grabbed a fresh diaper, wipes, cream, and powder from under Lilly's bassinet, and set it on the bed. "Want me to pack her bag?"

"I packed it last night. We just need to grab a spare outfit just in case she—" Meredith stopped mid-sentence as she was changing Lilly's diaper. "Oh, Lilly, no no. Stay still, peanut," she said, trying to hold the baby's legs still to keep her from wriggling.

"Doing your leg stretches?" Derek laughed, reaching for Lilly's legs. "Hang on. Let's let Mommy change you. She looks very pretty, and doesn't need poop on her dress."

Meredith cleaned Lilly and put a new diaper under her bottom, then Derek gently put her legs down. "Thank you," Meredith smiled at him, peeling back the tabs and fastening the diaper together.

"Teamwork," Derek said, pulling the white dress over Lilly's head while Meredith held her up. After she shimmied the bloomers up her legs, he picked her up.

"Oh, her headband." Meredith took it from her dresser, and gently put it in Lilly's hair. "There. All done."

"Beautiful," Derek grinned. "We should probably get going if we want to get pictures. My mom is waiting downstairs."

"I'm done. All we need is the extra change of clothes," Meredith said. She leaned in and kissed Lilly's cheek, then Derek. "We don't need any surprises in church."

"Once we're there, Mark and Cristina are officially on-duty godparents, which means they handle any diaper emergencies," Derek pointed out as they walked down the hall and into Lilly's bedroom.

Meredith laughed. "Cristina may be a godmother, but I'm pretty sure that duty would be passed to Mark," she said, pulling a back-up yellow sundress from Lilly's closet.

"Did you intend that pun, or was that just a happy coincidence?" Derek couldn't help but smirk.

"What pun?" she asked, before putting the pieces together. "Oh, duty? Like the other kind? Seriously, are you twelve, Derek?" Meredith laughed.

"I'm just saying, that was very clever," Derek defended. "Mommy is funny, Lilly."

...

Both Meredith and Derek held their breaths when the priest, Bridget's brother, poured the water over Lilly's head while Cristina held her. When her lower lip quivered, Meredith winced a little. "Crap."

"She's okay," Derek whispered, wrapping his arm around her as they sat in the pew.

Lilly only fussed slightly, but it was enough to make Meredith antsy. She bobbed her foot up and down, resisting the urge to jump out of her seat and take her baby. But when Cristina gently started bouncing Lilly in her arm, Meredith sighed in relief. Lilly's little sobs quieted, and she found her thumb, her way of self-soothing.

"Okay, good," Meredith said.

After Mark and Cristina recited their promise to take care of Lilly, and Lilly was blessed, the small ceremony was over. Derek, Meredith, and Linda walked up to Bridget's brother, who was standing with Mark and Cristina. Derek reached out and shook the man's hand. "Thank you again for doing this on such short notice. We really appreciate it, Father O'Hannon."

"Oh, I was happy to do it. It's so nice to finally meet you. Bridget's my sister, and she's married to Mark, so you're practically my family," he chuckled, shaking Meredith's hand, too. "And please, call me Tim. By the way, your daughter is beautiful. I've baptized hundreds of babies, but I think Lilly wins."

"Heart breaker, right?" Mark agreed, handing Lilly back to Meredith. "Makes me want to start trying for a baby, but Bridget said no babies for at least a year."

"For now, we can just enjoy Lilly and spoil the crap out of her," Bridget said, smiling at Lilly whose chin was resting on Meredith's shoulder.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, that's something they do very well."

Lilly started fussing and Meredith subtly peeked into her diaper. "I'm going to go change her. I'll be right back."

"I'll come with you," Cristina said.

Meredith grabbed the diaper bag, then looked incredulously at her friend. "Seriously?"

"It's not like I'm going to be changing the diaper," Cristina shrugged. "I just didn't feel like making small talk," she said as they walked to the bathroom in the back of the small church.

"Here. Hold her while I lay down her changing pad," Meredith said, handing Lilly to Cristina.

Lilly looked up at Cristina curiously, and Cristina cautiously held her at arm's length. "Please don't spew anything at me."

"She won't," Meredith said, rolling her eyes amusedly as she unfolded the changing pad. "Okay, lay her down."

Cristina carefully placed Lilly on the cushioned pad, then stepped aside so Meredith could change her diaper. She held out her finger, and Lilly took hold of it. When Meredith noticed the gesture, she smiled. "Admit it, you love my daughter," she said, lifting Lilly's dress.

"Well, obviously I love her. She's my person's baby. But just because I love her doesn't mean I want one for myself."

"Uh huh..." Meredith said, a smirk on her face. She took the dirty diaper from under Lilly's bottom after wiping her, folded it up, and handed it to Cristina. "Can you toss this in the trash, please?"

"Eww," Cristina said, reluctantly taking it from her. "Wow, this is heavy. Does she really pee this much?"

"She's practically attached to my boobs. In one end, out the other," Meredith said, holding up Lilly's legs while she slid a new diaper underneath her. After securing it around her waist, Meredith adjusted the strap of Lilly's little, white sandal.

"So, you really enjoy all this? Cleaning poop and getting spit up on and never sleeping through the night anymore?" Cristina asked.

Meredith smiled at Lilly. "Yeah, I do."

"What's it gonna be like when you go back to work?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I know I have to go back in a few weeks, but I can't imagine leaving her. Derek and I really don't want her in daycare, and we don't want a nanny, either. She's our baby. We don't want some stranger with a child psychology degree raising her," Meredith said, combing her fingers through Lilly's still damp hair, then putting her headband back on.

"What about Derek's mom?" Cristina asked.

"I know if we asked, she would stay as long as we wanted her to; but we can't expect her to do that. She has fifteen grandchildren on the east coast that need her, too," Meredith said, picking Lilly up and kissing her forehead.

Without being asked, Cristina folded up the changing mat and tossed it back into the diaper bag, then slung it over her shoulder. "You really can't take time off from work, though, can you?"

Meredith sighed. "I'm actually considering taking a few months off. I know if I do, I'll be way off track for finishing my residency on time, but I don't know what else we're going to do. I just refuse to do to Lilly what my mother did to me," she said as Cristina opened the bathroom door for them to exit.

"Does Derek know this?" Cristina asked.

"No," she replied. "I don't know how to tell him. He would feel so guilty, and I don't want him to feel that way. We always said we'd figure something out when we had kids, but now that we actually have one, even the thought of leaving her upsets me."

Owen walked up to them in the corridor, and kissed Cristina's cheek, his keys jangling in his hand. "I have to get going. My ER shift starts in twenty minutes," he said. He put his hand on Meredith's shoulder, and kissed the top of Lilly's head. "It was great to see both of you. I swear, Lilly looks more like you every day."

"Thanks for coming," Meredith replied. "It means a lot to Derek and me."

"Of course. I just wish I was going to the after party for all the food, too," he laughed.

"I'll send Cristina home with some," Meredith promised.

"Are you sure you don't need any help? The ER can be a bloodbath on the weekends..." Cristina said, her not-so-subtle attempt at escaping the small get-together they were having back at the house.

"I think I can manage. Today you're a godmother. You can be a surgeon tomorrow," Owen said, waving at the three of them before leaving the church.

Lilly looked up at Meredith, her eyebrows scrunched together, and Meredith laughed. "Lilly does not approve of you trying to bail on her party," she said.

"No, she's pissed that you're depriving her godmother of possible bloody surgeries," Cristina argued.

"We have alcohol at home," Meredith said.

Cristina groaned. "Hmm, fine."

...

They all sat around the table on the backyard patio. Meredith had insisted on a small non-party party, just something to celebrate Lilly's day, so she and Derek compromised on a barbecue, the happy medium between fine china and ordering takeout. Meredith watched as Derek held a spatula, manning the grill. There was something about Derek handling meat that made her hot for him, but for now, she decided watching from a few feet away would suffice, at least until she could get him alone later on in the day.

"So, we're having a party for Lilly, and she's not even here," Cristina commented before taking a sip of her beer.

Meredith laughed. "She was tired. Derek's mom offered to hold her while she naps."

"Aww, you hold her while she naps?" Lexie asked, scooping some dip onto her chip.

"Sometimes, but only for napping. She's a light sleeper like Derek, so if she wakes up, it's easier just to rock her back to sleep. Plus, she likes being held. She's very cuddly," Meredith smiled. "At night, she sleeps in the bed with us."

"Like, actually in the bed?" George asked.

"Yeah. In that baby sleeper thing," Meredith said. "She likes to be close to us. We'd rather have her there than in the bassinet just yet."

"If you and Derek wanted to have a sex-filled anniversary night, the offer still stands. Alex and I would be happy to watch her overnight," Izzie reminded her as she reached for a tortilla chip.

Alex shrugged. "As long as Iz changes the crap diapers, I don't mind."

"Oh god, I would throw up," Cristina said, nearly gagging at the thought.

"If it were any other baby, I probably would, too. But diaper changing doesn't even faze me anymore. I'm immune to all that baby grossness," Meredith said.

"Clearly. You're too busy staring at Derek's ass," Lexie accused.

Meredith scoffed. "I am not."

"Oh, you so are," Izzie agreed, laughing.

"Well, you'd be staring, too, if you weren't allowed to have sex for six weeks," Meredith defended as she leaned back in her chair.

"I'm shocked you even _want_ sex. I delivered a baby in the backseat of a car yesterday while I was working in the ER. Even seeing that hurts..." Cristina said with a cringe.

"That's how I felt for a few days. But believe me, it goes away. Now, I have to keep myself from tearing his clothes off and having my way with him," Meredith said.

Derek passed by the table, catching the tail-end of Meredith's sentence, and he smiled. "I really hope you're talking about me."

She smiled back at him. "In fact, I am."

"Hmm, good. I'm gonna go check on Lilly and my mom. I'll be right back," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"Shepherd, where's my cheeseburger? I'm starving," Cristina told him, showing him her empty plate.

"As always, I appreciate your patience, Cristina," he shot back.

"Let me know if Lilly is fussy. I can go feed her," Meredith said.

Derek nodded as he walked into the house. "Got it."

"How is it having Derek's mom here?" Lexie asked.

"She's amazing. Yesterday, she made me take a nap. I slept for three hours straight. I love her," Meredith said. "Seriously, I won the mother-in-law lottery."

"Mrs. Shepherd's the best, isn't she?" Mark chimed in. "Derek is one lucky bastard."

"Who made the spinach dip?" Alex interjected before scooping a large portion onto a slice of bread.

"Derek's mom," Meredith answered.

Alex nodded. "Yeah, okay, Shepherd is a lucky bastard."

Meredith smiled. "He's so good with Lilly. I don't know what I'm going to do when he goes back to work next week," she said.

"Come up to the hospital. Hang out with us," Izzie said.

"I'll probably be bored out of my mind. I'm sure you'll see me," Meredith laughed, swatting away a gnat that was flying near her face.

"Bored? I think I'd be frazzled out of my mind," Bridget countered.

"Lilly is such an easy baby. She's laid back, like Derek. And she enjoys sleeping, like me. We're pretty lucky," Meredith said, smiling again when she thought of her daughter.

"You know that means the next kid will be the complete opposite, right?" Lexie said as she reached over her chair to grab another beer from the cooler.

"You think so?" Meredith asked.

Lexie nodded. "Oh, yeah. That's how it was with Molly and me. I'm the orderly, well behaved one. Molly is messy and loud and out of control. Well, at least until she met Eric. I'm telling you, the second child is the wild child."

"Kinda like you, Mer," Alex grinned, raising his beer in a toast to her.

"Oh, crap," Meredith said, running a hand through her hair. She shrugged it off. "Well, we're not having another baby for a few years, so we have time to prepare. For now, we'll just enjoy our well behaved firstborn."

Derek slid open the back door leading out to the patio, stopping to kiss the top of Meredith's head again. "Lilly's sound asleep. And her thumb is in her mouth, so she should be out for a while."

"Damn, she loves that thumb of hers, huh?" Mark laughed.

"That's how I was. I sucked my thumb until I was in grade school," Meredith said.

"When her thumb is in her mouth, we know she's in a deep sleep. She won't even take a pacifier. Whenever we offer it to her, she just sucks on it for a second, then spits it back out. It's adorable," Derek grinned.

"So now, she has a whole drawer full of unused pacifiers. Maybe future fictitious baby number two will like them," Meredith said. "I don't even know if she'll take a bottle when the time comes."

"I think I'd choose boob over bottle, too," Mark pointed out.

Bridget nudged him with her elbow. "Her boobs happen to serve a greater purpose than just gawking at them," she said.

"While you're all discussing my multi-talented rack, I'm going to use the bathroom," Meredith said, standing up from her chair.

"Food's gonna be done in about ten minutes," Derek said as he resumed his place in front of the grill.

Meredith nodded, opening the back door. "Okay, I'll tell your mom to come out."

"Okay."

...

After using the bathroom, Meredith walked down the hall and into Lilly's nursery, where Derek's mother was sitting in the rocking chair, holding the baby while she slept. Meredith stood in the doorway and smiled. "How is she?"

"Still sound asleep," Linda said softly, smiling at Lilly. "You know, I can't get over how much she looks like Derek. I've been staring at her for the past half hour and I feel like it's forty years ago and I'm rocking Derek to sleep."

"Yeah?" Meredith asked, sitting on the ottoman at the foot of the rocking chair.

Linda kissed the top of Lilly's head, breathing in her baby scent. "Time goes so fast. Some days, I wake up and I wonder how all five of my kids are grown up and have given me sixteen grandkids. One day, I'm making Halloween costumes and packing school lunches. I can still see the five lunch boxes lined up on the kitchen counter. Four girly ones, and then Derek's, smack in the middle with Spider Man or race cars," she said. "He was the sweetest little boy. I never thought he'd grow up so quickly. And now, I'm holding my son's daughter."

"He's such a good dad," Meredith said, twirling her wedding ring subconsciously around her finger.

"You know, when my kids were growing up, the mother was supposed to take care of the cooking and cleaning and raising the family, but Jim was always there to help. He changed diapers and did laundry and went to the grocery store. He coached soccer teams, and never missed a dance recital. I couldn't have been blessed with a better husband. And I see all of those things in Derek."

"Derek's told me so much about him. I know it's hard for him not having his dad around. When Lilly was born, Derek kept saying how much he wished he could've been here to meet her," Meredith said.

Linda nodded somberly. "It's hard. Jim passed away when the kids were young. He never got to interrogate the boyfriends that the girls brought home, or walk them down the aisle at their weddings. Derek took over that role."

"Derek walked the girls down the aisle?" Meredith asked.

"All four of them. He always tried to be strong for all of us. I remember when Amy brought her first boyfriend over to the house. She was about thirteen. Derek and Mark gave the poor kid such a hard time. Oh, Amy was so mad at them," Linda laughed. "When those two were around, there was never a dull moment in the house."

Meredith smiled. "So, Mark was around a lot?"

"Oh, all the time. His parents weren't home that often, so Jim and I did our best to include him in everything. He always took both boys fishing or to baseball games, even little camp-outs in the backyard. I think Derek really leaned on Mark after Jim died. Whatever Derek didn't want to talk to me about, he had Mark," Linda said. "He didn't have his father, but he had a brother. I was grateful to have Mark around. He practically lived with us after Jim passed. That's why I'm glad that even after everything that's happened, they're still close."

"Me, too," Meredith said. "You know, in some weird way, it all worked out. I mean, I hate that Derek had to go through all of that, but if he hadn't..."

"I know. I think that every day. I knew Seattle would be a fresh start for him, but I had no idea it would be the best decision he's ever made. I've never seen him so happy," Linda said.

"Me either, especially since Lilly was born. He's happy every day. I was telling everyone that I don't know what it's going to be like when he goes back to work. I'm probably going to have to push him out the front door every morning," Meredith said.

"How do you think you'll handle going back?" Linda asked, admiring Lilly's tiny fingers.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe it's just the hormones, but I don't know if I'll be able to leave her. It sounds silly, I know. It's just that my mother did that to me. I barely ever saw her, and by the time I was in first grade, I didn't really care. I was so used to her _not_ being around that when she was, it was weird. That's not how I plan on raising Lilly. I know that Derek and I would never let that happen, but it still scares me, I guess," she confessed, leaning forward and rubbing Lilly's bare foot with her finger.

"Of course it would. You're a mom now. It's only natural that you would have that fear. I'd be feeling the same thing if I were you. You want to do things differently," Linda nodded in support.

"And if I had any other job, that would be fine. But the surgical program is already so competitive, and even if I took a few extra weeks off, it would put me behind—not that I mind. Obviously, Lilly comes first. I just don't know if my job will be waiting for me if I decide to take extended leave," Meredith continued on.

Linda took hold of Meredith's hand. "Do you want me to stay? You know I would be happy to stay and help. I'd even rent a house and live here until Lilly was in school, if you needed me to."

"We know you would, but we're not going to ask you to do that. Derek and I will figure something out," she said.

"I take it you haven't shared any of this with him?" Linda assumed.

"No, only Cristina knows. It's not definite. I'm still scheduled to go back in a few weeks. I've just been thinking about it a lot lately, especially because Derek goes back to work soon," Meredith said.

"Well, whatever you do, I know it'll be the best decision for Lilly," Linda said.

Meredith laughed softly. "I'm sorry. I swear, I didn't mean to use you as a therapist. You're just so easy to talk to."

"You can always talk to me, even if I'm not here. Call me whenever you want. Believe me, I raised five doctors. I've heard it all," Linda chuckled. "And besides, I consider you my fifth daughter. I'll always be there for you, sweetheart."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled. "That's... I really appreciate that."

Lilly opened her eyes and yawned widely, releasing her thumb from its hold in her mouth. Linda tickled her belly with her finger. "Look who's up."

"I thought you'd sleep longer," Meredith said, leaning in and kissing the baby's forehead. "I guess our talking woke her up. Lilly got the light sleeper gene from Derek."

"He's been like that since he was born. Jim and I always joked that he was more high maintenance than the girls. Every nap time was a production. Making sure he was fully asleep, tiptoeing out of the room, and holding the knob in so the door didn't click when it shut."

"Uh oh," Meredith said, laughing in spite of herself, and wondering what her and Derek's sex life would be like from now on, if Lilly was stirred by simple conversation. Hushed tones were nothing compared to the acoustics that bounced off the walls of their own bedroom. "We've used the music box you gave us at practically every nap time. She goes right to sleep."

"Oh, good," Linda said happily. "That's been in the family for years. Derek's grandmother hand-painted two when she was pregnant, one for Jim and on for his brother, David—Jim was a twin. Anyway, Jim kept it and gave it to Derek when he was born. It was always meant for his kids. And the circus painting works for either a boy or a girl."

"It's adorable," Meredith said. "We really do love it."

"One day, you can give it to your kids, Lilly," Linda said, holding Lilly to her chest and kissing her cheek. She smiled at Meredith. "You and Derek make beautiful, little babies."

Meredith laughed. "Thank you," she said. "I think so, too."

Linda got up from the rocking chair and she and Meredith started to walk out of the nursery. "Just talk to him about work. You two will figure something out. And if you decide you'd like me to help you out, just say the word. I'd be on the first plane out here."

"We know you would," Meredith said. "And I'll talk to him. We'll work it out." Lilly gave Meredith an unintentional thumbs up on its way to her mouth, and Meredith smiled at her daughter. "We always do."

Derek walked up the steps just as they reached the landing, smiling at all three of them. "I was just coming up here to get you. Food's ready," he said.

"We're coming, sweetheart," Linda said, descending the stairs ahead of them, holding Lilly.

He looked over at Meredith and smirked at her. "Now's our chance. Five minutes of naked time while everyone is outside?" he joked, out of earshot of his mother.

Meredith rolled her eyes, taking his hand, then following Linda back downstairs. "Really, Derek? On baptism day?"

Derek grinned at her. "Worth a try."


	113. Back to Work

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**Thanks for your patience. I know I say that every time, but I really mean it. You guys are the best. Enjoy!  
**

The sun was barely risen when the blaring of the alarm broke through the peaceful silence of their bedroom. It only beeped twice before Derek turned it off, not wanting to wake Lilly. Derek groaned into his pillow and draped his arm over Lilly, resting his face by hers.

"Daddy doesn't want to go to work, Lilly," he said softly, his eyes still closed.

Meredith rubbed her nose as she stirred, blinking a few times as her eyes adjusted to the light. "Morning," she mumbled.

"Morning."

"Are you gonna get up?" Meredith asked him.

"Do I have to?" he asked back.

Meredith smiled sleepily. "Probably. You know, if you'd like to keep your job."

Derek breathed in Lilly's baby smell and kissed above her ear. "Hmm, I like you two much more than work."

"When's your first surgery?" she asked.

"At eight. I should be finished around noon," Derek said, regretfully sitting up, wanting nothing more than to lie down and go back to sleep.

"We'll visit you. Lilly and I will bring lunch," Meredith said. Lilly yawned widely, then opened her eyes, gazing up sleepily at both of them. "Sorry, peanut."

Derek smiled and scooped Lilly up, cradling her against his chest. "Did we wake you up? Or did you just want to say goodbye before I left for the day?" he asked, rubbing her cheek with his finger. "Think anyone would care if I brought my baby to work?"

Meredith laughed. "I don't think Babybjorns are welcome in the OR, but you could try," she said. "That's more fun than running errands, which is what I get to do today."

"Where do you have to go?" Derek asked, shuffling out of bed holding Lilly.

"Lilly needs more diaper cream, and we need cereal, toothpaste, and soap for the dishwasher, so we're going to the grocery store. Then we're going to buy stamps at the post office so we can finally mail thank you notes to your mom and sisters, and then we need to swing by the bank," Meredith said, leaning against the headboard. She sighed. "All I need is a minivan."

"I'm pretty sure you did all of those things before Lilly was born, too," Derek pointed out playfully. Lilly started rubbing her nose into Derek's shirt, and he smiled at her. "Hungry, princess?"

"After I buy my mom jeans, Lilly and I will pick up lunch. How about that little sandwich shop near the hospital?" Meredith suggested, propping a pillow on her lap, then adjusting her tee shirt. She reached for Lilly and held her close. "I'll feed you, Lillybug."

"Yeah, that sounds good," Derek said as he walked into the bathroom. "We also need to make sure we show Lilly off around the hospital. Apparently, the cafeteria ladies have been pestering Mark about when they get to meet her," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled down at her daughter, who was peacefully nursing, her eyes slipping shut again. "Hear that? You're famous."

"That'll help when she's applying for her surgical internship twenty-five years from now," Derek joked while he brushed his teeth. "She'll be a shoo-in."

"And because she's brilliant," Meredith added.

Derek spit into the sink and popped his head out of the bathroom, smiling. "I thought that was understood."

...

After hugging Lilly for a solid ten minutes before he left, Meredith watched as Derek finally pulled out of the driveway. She was sad to see him go, because the last few weeks of being home together was like living in their own blissful bubble of parenthood, but she knew that he had to go back to work. Lives had to be saved, and bills had to be paid. There was no way around it.

Meredith kissed the top of Lilly's head and walked toward the stairs. "Since the sun is just coming up now, how about you and I go back to sleep for a while?" she said before yawning.

She climbed the stairs, and trekked back down the hallway, where her warm bed awaited her. When Charlie heard Meredith enter the room, he looked at her briefly from his spot at the foot of the bed then rolled over. Meredith laughed. "You're the laziest dog ever," she said, crawling back under the covers.

"Come here, Charlie," she said, patting Derek's empty side of the bed. Charlie got up and walked over to her, spinning in a circle before plopping down, resting his head on Derek's pillow.

Meredith got herself settled in bed, then let Lilly lie on her chest, placing a protective hand over her back. Lilly nuzzled her face into Meredith's breasts, and closed her eyes within seconds. "I love you, Lilly," she said, closing her eyes, too. She reached over to pet Charlie. "You too, buddy."

Thirty minutes passed before Meredith was awoken by a faint smell, and she scrunched her nose. She opened her eyes, then peeked into the back of Lilly's diaper, unsurprisingly finding the source. As gently and quietly as she could manage, Meredith sat up, and placed Lilly in front of her, hoping she could change her diaper without waking her up.

She leaned over and grabbed a fresh diaper, the powder, and the pack of wipes from Lilly's bassinet, set them next to her, and pulled off Lilly's green pajama pants. After peeling back the adhesive, Meredith worked as quickly as she could, wiping, powdering, and securing a fresh diaper in record time. She bit her lip as she shimmied the baby's pants back up her legs. Diaper changing was an art form, and over the last few weeks, she'd mastered the skill.

Meredith tossed her supplies back into the bassinet, and put the dirty diaper on the nightstand. Just as she was about to pick Lilly up once again, Lilly's blue eyes opened, and she looked at Meredith.

"It's okay. Go back to sleep," Meredith cooed, scooping her off the bed. She put Lilly back on her chest, hoping she would fall back to sleep; but instead, Lilly just wriggled her tiny arms and legs, uninterested in the prospect of sleeping, no matter how much Meredith wished otherwise.

Meredith leaned down and kissed her head. "You're just like Daddy, huh? Once you decide you're up, you're up for good," she said, laughing softly. She glanced over at the clock. 7:18. Earlier than she would've liked to get up, enjoying taking advantage of sleeping in during her leave, but she just shrugged. "Well, we may as well be productive, then."

She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed, Lilly cradled in her arm. Charlie made no effort to move, so Meredith just shook her head, amused. "You get this king sized mattress all to yourself. Enjoy it," Meredith said, scratching behind his ears.

Meredith got Lilly's bouncy seat from the nursery, then lugged it back into the en-suite bathroom off their bedroom, and set it on top of the cushy bath mat on the floor. "Okay, Mommy's going to take a shower," Meredith said, laying Lilly in her seat, and fastening the buckle. She pressed the power button, and it began bobbing gently up and down.

When Lilly's thumb went to her mouth, and she began contentedly sucking, Meredith nodded in satisfaction. "Okay, good," she said, kissing her nose. "I promise, I'll only be ten minutes."

She turned on the water faucets in the shower, then stripped off her clothes, tossing them in the hamper next to the towel rack. "I'll just be on the other side of the curtain," Meredith said as she stepped over the side.

The warm water hit her skin, and she closed her eyes. Since her post-baby celibacy, Meredith had to find pleasure in other forms of recreation, mostly showering and home-cooked meals, which really were the next best thing to orgasms. She managed to wash her body and her hair without protest from Lilly, peeking out of the curtain every thirty seconds to check on her.

When Meredith spotted her razor sitting in the caddy, she checked on Lilly again. "Can Mommy shave her legs real quick?" she asked. Lilly just looked up at her and continued sucking her thumb, and Meredith smiled. "I'll take that as a yes. Thank you, peanut."

After shaving, Meredith was rinsing off, and ready to turn off the water faucets, but stopped when she poked her head out of the curtain to check on Lilly again. "Uh oh," she said when she noticed Lilly had spit up all over the front of her pajamas. "Okay, uh..." She stepped over the side, dripping wet, and carefully undressed Lilly, taking off her soiled pajamas, then her diaper.

"Rather than getting your tub set up, I'll just wash you off in here, instead," Meredith said, stepping back into the shower. She held Lilly close to her chest, away from the water spray. "Please don't freak out."

Lilly blinked her eyes at the warm, misty water, and looked around curiously, her hand by Meredith's neck. "See? Isn't this fun?" Meredith asked, gently running the wash cloth over Lilly's body. "Daddy and I love the shower," she said before biting her lip. "Crap, I probably shouldn't be telling you that."

But Lilly just rested her head on Meredith's breasts, knowing she was safe in her mother's arms. Meredith smiled when she saw that Lilly's eyes were getting heavy. "Oh sure, now you're sleepy..." she giggled.

Meredith rocked her back and forth, kissing the top of her wet head. "That's okay, you can sleep. I've got you," she whispered. "By the way, if Daddy were here, he'd find all of this very amusing."

...

Derek leaned against the desk at the nurses' station, finishing off the last of his coffee before he was scheduled to go into surgery. He was startled when he felt someone clap him on the back, and he quickly turned around, interrupted from scribbling notes in his patient's chart.

"Hey, man! How's it feel to be back?" Mark asked with a grin on his face, Owen next to him.

Derek smiled. "Hey," he replied. "Uh, the surgeon in me is excited to be back. But the father and husband in me would much rather be at home with Lilly and Mer. I could barely muster the willpower to leave the house this morning. I swear, I've been looking at pictures of Lilly on my phone every five minutes," he chuckled, reaching for it on the desk. He showed them a picture of Lilly in a purple romper, propped up against Charlie on the living room floor, and they both smiled.

"Prettier and prettier every day. Send me that picture," Mark said.

"She's beautiful, Shepherd," Owen complimented. "I think I'd rather be home, too."

"Mer's bringing her up today so we can have lunch. That's getting me through the next few hours," Derek said after sending the picture to Mark's phone. He squirt a few drops of Visine into each eye then blinked, rubbing off the excess with the back of his hand.

"Tired?" Mark guessed.

"After weeks off, you get used to sleeping in. It's an adjustment, getting back into the swing of things," he said, downing the last of his coffee, then tossing the cup in the trashcan. His pager beeped, and he pulled it from the clip on his pants. "They're ready for me in the OR. I should be out by noon, but if I'm not, can one of you call Meredith? Or if you see her, just tell her to hang around, and I'll find her?"

"Got it," Owen nodded.

"Alright, thanks," Derek waved as he walked off toward the OR, his first day back to being a surgeon since before Lilly was born. He got a text from Meredith, and felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. When he saw that she sent him a picture message, he quickly opened it. Lilly wrapped in an over-sized bath towel, with a wet head, sound asleep in her bouncy seat.

_Good luck. We love you. :) - L & M_, read the message underneath.

He smiled widely, and texted them back, then tucked the phone back into his pocket. He walked into the OR after scrubbing in, and was greeted with happy hellos from his coworkers. "Welcome back, Shep!" called out the anesthesiologist from beneath his mask.

Derek grinned at the OR team, the picture of his daughter instantly brightening his mood for the day. "Thank you. Good to be back."

...

The automatic doors of the hospital's front entrance opened with a swoosh, and Meredith walked through, Lilly in one arm, and lunch in the other. She saw Alex approaching and she smiled. "Hey," she said.

"Hey. Hunt asked me to tell you that Derek's surgery is running long. The chick on the table is pregnant and the baby's BP dropped, so he had to stop operating until the OB doc could get it back under control. But he should be finishing up soon," Alex said.

"Okay."

Lilly looked at Alex, and he waved at her. "Hey, kid," he said. "You know, you look more and more like your mom every time I see you."

"I think Uncle Alex wants to hold her," Meredith said, rocking back and forth on her heels.

"Oh, no that's..." Alex started to say.

Meredith held Lilly out toward him temptingly. "Yes, you do," she said. "Come on. Bond."

"Fine," Alex said, taking Lilly and holding her in his arm. "Damn, she still weighs practically nothing. You sure you're feeding her enough?" he teased.

Meredith laughed. "Believe me, she's a good eater. She gets that from me. I feel like I nurse her all day, every day. I barely even wear a bra anymore," she said as the two walked toward the elevators.

"Hmm, sweet," Alex grinned at her. "So how have you been? It's weird without you here."

"Aww, you miss me?" Meredith giggled. She pressed the arrow up button and readjusted her purse on her shoulder. "I'm good. I love being home with Lilly. Honestly, I've barely thought about work. I'm in twenty-four-seven mommy mode now. Well, that, and I'm sex-deprived."

"Still no feeding of the beast?" Alex asked, stepping onto the elevator after Meredith.

"I go next week to see Dr. Halloran. I'm probably going to mount Derek the second I get home," Meredith said before shaking her head in spite of herself. "Sorry, I shouldn't be telling you all this. I know you don't care about yeast cream and tingling feelings..."

"Nah, go ahead. I'm already holding a newborn. You can talk chick to me... tell me all the porny details," Alex said.

"Not much on the porn report. Next week, though? I'll reveal all," Meredith joked, fixing Lilly's strappy, pink sandal.

"Looking forward to it," Alex said.

The elevator doors opened, and Derek stood there, phone to his ear. When he saw Meredith and Lilly inside, he ended the call and slipped his phone back into the pocket of his scrubs. "Hey, I was just calling to let you know that I was out of surgery," he said, stepping aside so they could get off.

"Yeah, Alex said it ran long," Meredith said, smiling when Derek kissed her cheek.

"Altman's doing a surgery in OR 2, so I'm gonna go meet Izzie in the gallery," Alex said, gently handing Lilly over to Derek. "Let Iz know about next week."

"Okay, I will," Meredith replied.

"Next week? What's next week?" Derek asked confusedly, propping Lilly over his shoulder and pressing kisses to her forehead.

Meredith smiled. "The end of our sex drought. They might watch Lilly for us overnight," she said. "You know, so she doesn't have to listen to all the noise."

"Oh, God," Derek groaned, his face flushed with embarrassment. "Well, uh, yeah... we'll let you know."

Alex smiled at Lilly and shook her tiny hand. "See you later, beautiful," he said. He waved at the two of them. "See you, guys."

"Bye," they said in unison, walking down the hall toward Derek's office to eat lunch.

The smile didn't leave Derek's face as he hugged Lilly to him, reminiscent of how he was this morning before he left for work. "Daddy missed you so, so much, Lillybug," he said.

Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "You saw her, like, seven hours ago..."

"Yeah, you just wait until you have to come back. Seven hours is an eternity," Derek chuckled.

"Yeah," Meredith said, biting her lip. She still hadn't told him about the possibility of extended leave, or even taking time off, and as her maternity leave dwindled down each day, the less she liked to think about it. It hurt her that Derek had to go back to work; the thought of _both_ of them leaving Lilly was unbearable.

She played with the hem of her shirt as they walked. "So, uh, how's your day been?"

"Good. Surgery was a success. I showed the whole OR team Lilly's picture from this morning. She's the cutest baby they've ever seen. The vote was unanimous," Derek bragged, taking his key ring from his pocket and unlocking the door to his office.

"Well, good. Otherwise, we'd have a problem," Meredith laughed. "I knew it was tough for you this morning, going back to work, so I thought a picture might cheer you up."

"Made my whole morning. Thank you," Derek said as they dropped down onto the couch under the window. "Were you in the tub today?"

"Actually, she got her first shower," Meredith said, pulling the sandwiches she'd purchased from the deli out of the plastic bag.

"Shower?"

Meredith nodded. "I was in the shower, and she spit up all over her pajamas. And since you were off being a neurosurgeon hero, I had to be creative," she said, tickling the bottom of Lilly's foot after taking off her sandals and smiling when Lilly kicked her leg in response.

"Neurosurgeon hero. I love that you think that highly of me," Derek smirked. "So, how was she?" he asked, reaching for his sandwich.

"She liked it, actually. I expected protest, but she let me wash her," Meredith said.

Derek cradled Lilly in his left arm so he could eat with his right, and smiled at his daughter. "High five," he said, tapping her fist with his palm.

"She liked it so much, in fact, that she fell asleep while I was holding her," Meredith laughed. "Apparently, she won't just fall asleep in the tub. Showers work, too."

"Which reminds me, one week until you and I can have our soapy shower time," Derek said before taking a bite of his sandwich.

"We've had soapy shower time since Lilly was born... well, usually because we're too tired and don't feel like waiting for the other to finish, so we both just jump in," Meredith admitted, smiling when Lilly nuzzled her nose into Derek's shoulder and closed her eyes.

"Exactly. I'm talking about the kind that ends with me holding you up against the shower wall," Derek said.

Meredith cocked her head toward Lilly, eyes wide. "Derek."

"Hey, enjoy the days when we can have grown up conversations with her in the room. Before you know it, she'll be asking us what S-E-X is," Derek pointed out.

"Or even worse, she walks in on us," Meredith said, cringing slightly, licking some mustard off her finger.

Derek frowned. "Yeah, we'll have to install a lock at some point. Can't take any chances."

"Speaking of not taking any chances, when I go for my appointment next week, I was thinking of getting an IUD," Meredith said.

"Yeah?" Derek asked.

"Yeah. We need to use some form of birth control, and after going condom-less for so long, I don't want to go back. It's so much better without them—for both of us. And with Lilly and work, I know I'd forget to take the pill every day. An IUD just makes the most sense. Once it's in, we're good for up to five years. No muss, no fuss," Meredith said.

"Five years?"

"I know we're not waiting five years to have another baby. I just mean we'd be protected for as long as we wanted to," Meredith shrugged, unscrewing the cap to her bottle of water. "Once the doctor takes it out, we can start trying again right away."

"Whatever you feel the most comfortable with is fine with me," Derek said.

"Bridget's had one for a couple years, and has no complaints. She actually gave me the idea," Meredith said. "It'll just be easier, I think."

"Okay," Derek nodded.

"Hear that, Lilly? Now you're guaranteed to be an only child for at least a little while," Meredith said. She opened her small pouch of chips and popped one into her mouth. "How long do we want to wait? I mean, ballpark?"

Derek mulled the question over as he chewed. "I don't know. What do you think?" he asked.

"I was thinking we could start trying again when Lilly was one and a half, maybe start trying that January or February before," Meredith replied. "It took a few months for me to get pregnant last time, so I figured by the time the second baby was born, Lilly would nearly be three, maybe a little younger. She'd be a toddler, and potty trained, which would make it easier. Plus, she'd be really helpful. And I'd be done my residency, so I'd have a lighter schedule."

"Wow. You've put some thought into this, huh?" Derek teased her.

Meredith flung a chip at him but smiled. "I really just want them close in age how you and your sisters are. I didn't have that growing up, and I want that for Lilly and her down the line brother or sister."

"Me, too. And if we're set on having two kids, I guess we shouldn't wait too long. It'll just be harder if Lilly's already in grade school, and then we have a newborn. If they're close in age, they'll be right behind one another, you know? It just makes sense, as far as timing it," Derek said.

"Exactly."

"Okay, then," Derek grinned. He kissed Lilly's cheek. "How's that sound, Princess? Is that a plan?"

"Look at us, planning our future during your lunch break. We're very efficient," Meredith said.

"It's not over yet," Derek said, attempting to peel off the lid to his yogurt with one hand, the other holding Lilly.

Meredith took it from him and easily opened it. "What do you mean?"

"I wasn't kidding about the cafeteria ladies. This morning, I went down for coffee and told them you were coming in with Lilly. If we don't go show her off, I'll have to suffer their wrath," he chuckled, smiling when she handed him his yogurt back. "Thank you."

"Seriously?"

"Yes, seriously. Plus, they usually give me free breakfast and coffee whenever I'm here early," Derek said. "I don't want that to end."

"So, you're basically whoring out our baby for free pastries?" she laughed.

"Well, it sounds bad when you put it like that."

Meredith narrowed her eyes playfully at him. "You are unbelievable."


	114. Happy Two Years

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

Meredith rolled over in bed on the morning of her anniversary. But it wasn't the sunshine coming in through the windows or Derek arriving at the foot of the bed with a tray full of breakfast food that woke her up. She reached over Lilly and pushed gently at Derek's shoulder. "Derek," she whispered.

"Hmm?"

"She pooped," Meredith said.

"How do you know?"

Meredith yawned. "Because she's right next to me, and it smells like poop."

"Okay," he said into his pillow.

"Wanna change her so I'm not smelling poop anymore?" Meredith asked him.

"Okay." Derek rolled onto his back and rubbed his eyes, then forced himself into a sitting position. He glanced over at the clock, his eyes barely able to make out the time because he was still groggy with sleep. "Hey, happy anniversary," he said, leaning over Lilly to kiss the top of Meredith's head.

Meredith smiled, keeping her eyes closed. "You, too."

Derek scooped a still sleeping Lilly from her spot between the two of them, and laid her in front of him. He lifted up Lilly's nightgown above her belly, and peeled back the adhesive on her diaper. He cleaned her up with the wipes that were sitting on his nightstand, and pulled out the old diaper from underneath her bottom, folding it up. As he was lifting her legs to slide the fresh diaper under her, Derek noticed a small puddle on the comforter, and dropped his head in amused defeat.

"Lilly, why?" he couldn't help but laugh, smiling at his daughter, still snoozing, thumb in her mouth.

"What?"

Derek shifted the baby to a dry spot on the bed and wiped her again. "She peed on the blanket," he said.

"She did?"

"Yeah. She was only diaper-less for ten seconds. Your timing is impeccable, Princess," Derek chuckled softly, fastening the new diaper around her waist and picking her up.

"I'll take her. You can strip the sheets," Meredith said, reaching for Lilly, who curled into her chest contentedly. She rolled out of bed and began walking back and forth across the room, hoping the motion would keep Lilly asleep.

Derek smirked at her as he pulled off the sheets, and Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "What?" she asked.

"Now we have an excuse to put on the sexy, red sheets for tonight," he said, raising his eyebrows at her.

"Tonight?" Meredith echoed, confused. But it only took her a nanosecond to remember what tonight was: the official end to her post-baby celibacy. "Oh, right. Anniversary sex."

"Not to mention, the end of a five week dry spell. Prepare for orgasm-palooza," he said, rolling the sheets into a ball.

"I may need to get that in writing..."

"Oh, it's happening. Rain or shine, diapers or vomit. In fact, we could do it right now," Derek said.

"It's seven o'clock in the morning."

"You were cleared for sex yesterday. Lilly is still asleep. We could..." he pointed out as they walked into the hallway toward the stairs.

Meredith laughed. "If you want me to be awake for it, can you at least put on a pot of coffee first?" she requested.

"I thought you weren't drinking coffee," he said.

"As long as I'm not chugging gallons of it, Dr. Halloran said it's fine. Plus, I've been pumping so Lilly has backup bottles," Meredith said, kissing the top of Lilly's head, following Derek into the laundry room.

"Coffee _and_ sex? Jackpot," Derek grinned as he tossed the soiled laundry into the washer.

"I know. I don't know which one I've missed more," Meredith said.

Derek winced playfully. "Ouch."

"Don't worry. Once the beast is awakened tonight, I'm sure sex will trump any amount of caffeine intake," Meredith promised him.

"Good," Derek chuckled. "So, are we letting Lilly spend the night with Stevens and Karev tonight?"

They walked into the kitchen, and Meredith put Lilly in her motion swing next to the table. "I saw Iz yesterday at the hospital when I was there for my appointment, and we compromised. Since I know we'd just be missing her and worrying about her all night if she wasn't here, Izzie offered to watch her while we went out to lunch or something," she said.

"Okay," Derek nodded, pouring two cups of coffee, one for each of them. "So, uh, how are we gonna..."

"Do the nasty nasty tonight?" Meredith guessed.

"Not the words I would've picked, but yeah," he agreed.

He handed her the steaming mug of coffee and she breathed it in, closing her eyes. "Oh, God. I might have an orgasm," Meredith joked, finally taking a sip after many, many months without.

"Good?"

"Amazing would be an understatement," she said. "About tonight, I think we should be fine. Once Lilly falls asleep, she's usually out for three hours until she needs to eat. We can just put her in her crib. And we have the baby monitor. I mean, that's how other parents do it, right?"

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "And you're feeling okay, right? I mean, after getting the IUD?"

"Yeah. I was only a little crampy for a few hours yesterday, which is normal, but I'm fine now," Meredith said.

"No pain?"

Meredith smiled. "No pain."

They both sipped their coffee in silence for a few moments, taking in the quietude of their home. The only noise was Lilly's swing as it rocked gently from side to side, and a few birds chirping outside somewhere. Meredith looked at him and bit her lip. "Quickie?"

"What? Where? Here?" Derek asked.

"Laundry room," Meredith pointed.

Derek cocked his head at her. "You're serious?"

"What? Lilly's asleep. We'd only be, like, five minutes," Meredith said, taking his hand and pulling him up out of his chair. "Neither of us has had it in weeks. We're not gonna last long."

"Risky. I like it," Derek grinned, shutting the laundry room door once they were inside, keeping it open only a crack so they could hear Lilly if she started crying.

Meredith gasped when Derek hoisted her up onto the washer, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. "Mmm, Derek," she said, splaying her fingers over his cheeks and kissing him. "I missed this."

"Me, too," he said, his breath catching in his throat when she reached into his boxers and cupped him. "Damn it," he hissed.

Meredith giggled as she continued to tease him. "Good?" she asked.

"Yes," Derek groaned, leaning in and beginning to kiss her neck, smiling against her skin when she tipped her head back.

"Hang on," Meredith said as she lifted up and slipped off her panties and shorts in one move. Derek's hand went between her legs and he started to rub her. "Holy crap. Derek." She felt him hardening underneath in her hand, then pushed off his boxers. "Come on," she whispered.

"Okay," he said, putting his hands on her waist as she scooted forward.

Meredith sucked in a breath when she felt him against her. "Oh, Derek," she moaned.

Just as Derek was about to go for it, Charlie barked, and they heard his paws scratching at the sliding glass door in the kitchen, followed by Lilly's wails as she was unwillingly pulled from her sleep.

Meredith dropped her head onto Derek's shoulder. "Crap."

Derek regretfully stepped back, picking up her panties and shorts from the floor. "Can you..." he said.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded as she hopped off the washer and pulled her clothes up her legs. "Just... get rid of that," she said, her eyes trailing toward his groin.

"Trying," Derek said, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

Meredith opened the laundry room door and walked into the kitchen, smiling at Lilly, her face red from crying. "What happened, peanut?" she asked, unbuckling her then picking her up.

Charlie continued to bark and scratch, and Meredith rolled her eyes when she saw a squirrel skittering back and forth across the patio. "Charlie, it's a squirrel. And it's on the other side of the glass," she said, unsure as to whether she should laugh or cry. "Damn nature. This is what happens when you live in the wilderness..."

Lilly continued to cry, and Meredith bounced her gently. "Not a very pleasant way to wake up, huh? I know. You're okay," she soothed.

Charlie turned away from the back door after getting bored with the squirrel, and walked over to his toy basket, pulling out a stuffed monkey. He stretched out on the floor and began squeaking it, much to Meredith's amusement. "Oh, sure. Now you couldn't care less about the squirrel," she said, leaning down to scratch his head.

"How you doing in there?" she called out to Derek. "Flag still flying?"

"Another minute," Derek replied, still calming himself down in the laundry room. "Is Lilly okay?"

"Charlie freaked out over a squirrel and Lilly got startled, that's all," Meredith said. She leaned against the door and laughed. "That's parenthood for you. Non-stop coitus interruptus."

"That would imply that we already started. We didn't even get that far," Derek chuckled.

"One second later, and it would've been even harder to stop. Maybe it's a good thing," Meredith pointed out.

Derek finally emerged from the laundry room and kissed her forehead. "Hmm, yeah," he said against her skin.

Meredith wrapped her free arm around him. "Tonight, I will let you take me in any position you want... multiple times," she whispered into his ear.

Derek groaned at the thought. "You're not helping, Mer," he replied.

"Oops. Sorry," she giggled, taking a step back, so that he didn't have to go back into the laundry room a second time to calm himself down.

"I hate squirrels," Derek laughed.

Meredith patted his arm, smiling. "I know. Me, too."

...

Four hours passed, and Lilly was still fussy after being woken up earlier that morning. She refused to go down for a nap, and she protested every time they tried to put her in her swing or boppy seat. And she was even more unhappy when Derek laid her on the couch to change her diaper.

"What's wrong, Princess? This isn't like you," Derek said as he took her old diaper off.

"Does her butt look red to you?" Meredith asked, watching as Lilly bent her knees back and forth.

Derek lifted up her tiny legs to check more closely, then shook his head. "No, not at all."

"She pooped this morning, so she's not constipated; and it's not diaper rash," Meredith said. "Maybe she has gas. She's kind of pumping her legs."

"Yeah, she is," Derek agreed, fastening a new diaper around her waist after cleaning her. "Does your belly hurt, Lillybug?" He gently pumped her knees toward her chest, and her crying went down a few octaves for a few moments.

Meredith leaned down and kissed the baby's wrinkled-covered forehead as she cried. "I think she's gassy."

"What should we do?" Derek asked.

Meredith picked up her phone off the end table, checking the time on the display. "It's almost twelve, so Izzie is expecting us soon. But I don't want to take Lilly over there if she's not feeling well. That wouldn't be much fun for either of them. Or us, knowing that she's miserable."

"Yeah," Derek said, sighing. As much as he was looking forward to having a lunch date with Meredith on their anniversary, Lilly was more important. He smiled at his daughter and picked her up. "It's alright, Lillybug. We're gonna make it all better, okay?"

"I'll call Iz, then I'll cancel our reservation at Camparo's," Meredith said.

"Okay," Derek said. He got up off the couch with Lilly, managing to pump her legs with one hand, and walked over to the bookshelf. When he spotted _Your Baby's First Year_, he pulled it down. "Okay, let's see..."

Derek skimmed the contents, and flipped to the section on infant gas. Back when he lived in New York, and babysat his nieces and nephews nearly every weekend, he knew all the tricks, and had cures for nearly every malady, from common to unusual. But it had been a few years and he'd become rusty, so he needed a cram session. He found a tablet and pen in the side table drawer, and jotted down everything the book had to offer.

"Piece of cake. Mommy and I are gonna help your belly, I promise," Derek said. He propped her over his shoulder, rubbing small circles on her back. "Can you burp for me?"

Meredith hung up with Izzie, and put her phone next to the book on the end table. "Any info. in there?" she asked.

"Yeah. It said to burp her first, just to see it that's the quickest fix. But if this doesn't work, it suggested a bath. It might help her relax, and the warm water will help the gas bubbles expand and make it easier for her to get it out. And she loves baths, so at the very least, it'll probably make her tired. Maybe she'll nap," Derek said, kissing Lilly's cheek.

"Okay," Meredith said.

"What did Stevens say?"

"Just that she wants a rain check for babysitting, and she hopes Lilly feels better, that's all," Meredith said before laughing. "Honestly, she probably thought I made it all up just so we wouldn't have to be apart from her."

"Yeah, probably," Derek agreed, his smile turning to a frown when Lilly's small fusses escalated again, and morphed into crying. "Not happy about the burping, huh?" he asked her.

Meredith reached out and Derek handed Lilly over to her. "Come here, peanut," she said, wiping the big crocodile tears off of Lilly's cheeks. "Bath?" she asked Derek.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, we can try."

They trekked upstairs to try option two, and Lilly buried her face in Meredith's chest, clinging to her shirt with her tiny hand. "I know it hurts. We're gonna help you, Lilly," Meredith said. She pulled off Lilly's clothes while Derek filled the tub, taking her soap out of the cabinet beneath the sink.

"All set," Derek said, testing the water with his hand.

"Okay." Meredith tossed Lilly's diaper in the trash can, and gently set the baby in her tub.

Lilly's cries resolved back into fussing when the warm water touched her skin, and they both sighed in relief. "You like that, Lilly?" Derek asked. He dipped a soft wash cloth into the tub, and draped it over her belly. "The book said a warm compress might help."

"I hope so," Meredith said. "I know baby gas is normal, but still, it breaks my heart when she's sad."

Derek pressed his lips to her temple and kissed her. "Me, too."

Lilly suddenly let out some of the gas she'd been harboring in her stomach, and there was a burst of bubbles underneath the water. "Did she just..." Meredith said, watching as Lilly's blue eyes went wide in surprise.

Derek laughed, the smile on his face reaching his eyes, and Meredith began laughing, too. "That was awesome, Lilly," he practically cheered, wiping away the tears that fell from laughing so hard. "Did you see the look on her face when she did it?"

"I know," Meredith giggled. "We need to get her to do that again, so we can get it on tape."

"Good blackmail for when she brings boyfriends over," Derek joked, wrapping his arm around Meredith's shoulders. "Definitely the highlight of our anniversary so far."

Meredith leaned into Derek, breathing him in. "Two years ago today, we were getting married. And now, we have a daughter and we're celebrating her gassiness."

"Crazy, isn't it?"

"Hmm," Meredith hummed in agreement. "And we met five years ago on July 7th. And then again the next morning at work," she said.

"You mean after you spent the night doing dirty things to me on your living room floor, took the blanket off my ass when you woke up the next day, and proceeded to kick me out?" Derek said with a grin. "We've come a hell of a long way since then."

Meredith smiled as Lilly wiggled her toes under the water. "Yes, we have."

"Are you feeling better?" Derek asked Lilly, rubbing his hand over her belly, still covered with the warm cloth.

"I think she is, at least a little," Meredith said.

Lilly let out a small burp as Derek rubbed her stomach, and he smiled in satisfaction. "Good job," he encouraged. "Don't worry, you're tiny. There can't be that much more air in your belly."

"Hang on, I actually think I bought some Mylicon back when I was pregnant. Let me go check in her room," Meredith said, leaving the bathroom and returning a minute later, holding a blue box. "I recommend this stuff for newborns that come into the clinic sometimes. Apparently, it works miracles."

"Oh, Mylicon is good. My sisters used to use it for their kids," Derek said.

"Shepherd approved?" Meredith joked, pulling the bottle from the box and shaking it.

Derek laughed. "Shepherd approved," he echoed.

"Okay, 0.3 milliliters for infants under two," Meredith said after reading the back of the box. She filled the dropper with the correct dosage and handed the bottle to Derek. "Here, taste it first."

"Why do I have to taste it? I'm not the gassy one," Derek chuckled.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Come on, do it for your daughter. If it tastes okay, we know she probably won't spit it out," she said.

"Fine," Derek said. He ran his finger around the rim of the bottle, then licked it off, gauging the taste of it on his tongue. "It's actually kind of sweet, like sugar water. She'll take it."

"Okay, good," she said, smiling at Lilly. Meredith gently wedged the dropper between Lilly's lips and aimed it for the inside her cheek, per the directions. "Mmm, yummy, right?" she said, slowly squeezing the medicine into her mouth.

Lilly smacked her lips together curiously when the taste hit her tongue, but still swallowed it, unfazed. "That's my girl," Derek said, taking Lilly's hand and giving her a high five.

"Taking her meds. like a champ," Meredith said as she screwed the cap back on the bottle. "Fingers crossed that they kick in soon."

"Yeah," Derek said, taking a towel from off the shelf.

"Okay, Lilly. Let's get dried off," Meredith said, picking her up from the bathtub, then handing her off to Derek, who wrapped the towel around her small body. "I'll clean up if you wanted to dress her. Maybe don't put pants on her, though. It's probably not a good idea to have anything constricting around her belly," she said.

Derek nodded. "I'll put her in a nightgown."

"Okay."

Meredith dumped the bath water into the sink and rung out the wash cloth, then tossed it in the hamper. After drying the tub out and putting it back under the cabinet, she went into Lilly's room where Derek sat with her in the rocking chair, gently pushing her knees to her chest as he rocked her back and forth. Meredith leaned against the door, smiling at the two of them.

Derek looked up at her, a mirrored smile on his face. "I think she's finally getting tired," he said.

"Good," she said, walking over and sitting on the ottoman. "Elmo nightgown. Excellent choice."

"She loves Elmo," Derek grinned. "In fact, when you were at your appointment yesterday, Lilly sat in her boppy seat and watched Elmo's World for a full half hour while I folded the laundry."

"That's because we made a very smart baby," Meredith said, stroking Lilly's belly with her finger. "She's probably hungry."

"You can feed her. I'll throw something together for dinner," Derek said as he got up from the rocking chair with a grunt. "This chair is so comfy. I could probably fall asleep in it."

Meredith laughed, taking the baby from Derek. "Oh, I have."

"Not gonna happen tonight," Derek said with a smirk, kissing her cheek before he walked out of the room.

She just smiled. Whether or not they got to have their celebratory anniversary sex tonight, it was still amusing to see Derek so determined to make it happen.

...

After nursing, Meredith went downstairs and into the kitchen, Lilly sound asleep in the baby sling, following the scent of whatever Derek had cooked. She stopped in her tracks and smiled when she reached the doorway. "So, this is your idea of throwing something together for dinner?" she asked.

Derek put the pot of pasta down on the table next to the frozen pizza he cooked, then pulled out a chair for her. "It may not be Camparo's award winning cuisine, but I figured we could still be romantic," he said.

"Thank you."

"Happy two years," Derek said.

Meredith put her hand on his cheek and kissed him. "Happy two years," she returned.

They sat down at the table, and Meredith couldn't help but laugh when Derek struck a match and lit a candle. "What're you doing?"

"I told you. Showering you with romance," he teased.

He handed her a wine glass and she narrowed her eyes curiously. "This isn't actual wine, right?"

"No, it's sparkling cider. Or as I like to call it, white grape juice with bubbles. Remember, we bought it on Valentine's Day back when you were pregnant. I found it in the fridge," Derek explained.

Meredith clanked her glass against his and they both took a sip. "Very clever," she said.

"Was Lilly fussy when you nursed her?" Derek asked as he put a slice of pizza on her plate, then some pasta.

"No, she was actually fine. I think the medicine kicked in. And I made sure she didn't suck down a lot of air. I think the gas was probably from the bottle she had early this morning. She hasn't gotten the hang of it yet, I guess. For now, I'll just breastfeed. No more bottles until she absolutely needs one," Meredith said, smiling down at Lilly, who had her face nuzzled into Meredith's chest, holding onto her shirt with her tiny hand as she slept. "She's still clingy, so I just put her in the sling, rather than risk another meltdown," she said.

"Yeah, no more meltdowns," Derek chuckled, taking a bite of pizza, not a food he typically ate, but he gave into the gluttony for the sake of their anniversary.

"She fell asleep while I was still nursing, and she really only does that when she's super tired. I think she'll actually sleep well tonight," Meredith said. "We might get to have sex after all." She twirled some pasta around her fork and shoveled it into her mouth. "Damn, this is really good," she said after she swallowed. "And you better eat some, so I don't look like a pig."

"I'm eating it," Derek laughed, twirling some pasta on his fork, too. "I need my carb intake. Gotta be able to keep up with you tonight."

"Me? What about you?"

"You said any positions we could think of, and you're very flexible. That's gonna require lots of energy," Derek pointed out, a knowing grin on his face.

"And you're a red blooded man who hasn't had sex in over a month," Meredith countered.

"Right, so eat up. You're gonna need your share of stamina, too," he said.

"Okay, then," Meredith smiled before taking a bite of her pizza. "By the way, what's for dessert?"

Derek swallowed a sip of his drink. "Strawberry ice cream and chocolate syrup. It's the closest thing we have to chocolate covered strawberries."

"Nice improvisation," Meredith complimented.

"I thought so, yes?" he asked, feigning arrogance. "I'm just glad Lilly is feeling better; that's all that matters," Derek said, smiling at his daughter as she lay sleeping, cradled by his wife. "God, she's beautiful, isn't she?"

Meredith ran her fingers through Lilly's soft, dark head of hair and nodded. "Yeah, she is. We make pretty people."

"Yes, we do."

"I still don't know how it's already been over a month since she was born," Meredith said. "It's like we blinked, you know?" She hugged Lilly to her and breathed in her baby smell. "Don't grow up too fast, okay?"

"We still have plenty of milestones, don't worry. First word, the first time she walks, first time she uses the potty," he said, tossing Charlie a slice of pepperoni from the top of his pizza. "Lots of firsts coming up. Not any time soon, though."

"She'll be walking and talking on our next anniversary," Meredith realized. "Well, saying a few words, anyway. Unless she inherits your chattiness; then she might be the most eloquent one year old ever," she teased him.

Derek smirked. "And what about you, Queen of Ramble?"

"Fine. We both talk a lot," Meredith appeased him, looking down at the baby. "You're gonna be a rambly chatterbox, Lilly. I think it's inevitable."

"A rambly chatterbox with an extensive vocabulary whose intelligence is so astounding that she gets into the med school of her choice, becomes a brilliant surgeon, and takes care of us when we're old and frail," Derek amended.

"Exactly," Meredith agreed, licking some pizza sauce off her finger. "By the way, that was a very rambly sentence."

"I've known you for five years," Derek shrugged. "Your rambly-ness rubbing off on me was inevitable, too."

...

Lilly was fed, and sound asleep in her crib, a light lullaby coming from the music box sitting on the shelf next to the small nightlight in her bedroom. Only a nanosecond passed after Meredith and Derek walked into the hall when he picked her up, her legs wrapping around his waist.

"Derek!" she shouted softly, her laughter concealed when he pressed his lips against hers, carrying her into their own room. Meredith had her shirt off by the time Derek gently dropped her onto the bed, and he came down on top of her, scooting them back toward the pillows.

"Hmm, are you healed?" he asked playfully, his mouth going to her chest, kissing around the lace cups of her bra.

Meredith laughed. "I'm healed."

She ran her fingers through his hair and tipped her head back, letting him lavish her body as long as he wanted. It had been far too long since they were allowed to go all the way, always having to stop themselves before things got too heated, and there was no turning back. Now though, five weeks were over and done. They could do anything and everything they wanted. And they intended to.

"Hmm, Derek," Meredith moaned, feeling the familiar tingle course through her body when his hands touched her skin, roaming along her stomach and up to her breasts. She reached for his shirt, and swiftly pulled it over his head. She tossed it over the side of the bed, careful not to knock the baby monitor off the nightstand, then rubbed along his shoulders, feeling his muscles move beneath her hands, eventually making her way down to his hips. She used her feet to kick off his boxers, leaving him naked above her.

When Derek's fingers hooked into the waistband of her shorts and panties, she arched her back, letting him pull them down her legs while she got rid of her bra. Though Derek always made her feel like she was beautiful, Meredith still bit her lip, self-conscious, unsure of how he felt about her post-baby body, laid bare for his eyes to see.

Derek must have noticed the look on her face because he stopped his invisible trail of kisses he'd been making all over her chest and smiled at her, cocking his head. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just... " she started, "I mean, we haven't done this in a while and I..." She let out a frustrated sigh as she searched for words. "Do you still think I'm...?"

Derek finished her sentence without hesitation. "Sexy? Meredith, yes."

"Yeah?"

"You have never been more beautiful to me, ever. You gave birth to our daughter. Your body is... God, I couldn't be more in awe of it. Of _you_," Derek said, brushing his thumb under her chin.

Meredith smiled up at him. He meant what he said, and she knew it. "Okay."

Derek wrapped his arms under her shoulders. "Are you nervous?" he asked.

"Well, not to be crass, but the last thing in there was six pounds and came shooting out of my body," Meredith giggled. "Other than that, no."

"Tonight is all about us. It's gonna be great, I promise," Derek assured her.

Meredith put her hands on his cheeks and kissed him. "I know," she whispered.

The way he kissed her back made her moan again, and all of her lingering self-consciousness melted away. She trailed her fingers down his spine and back up again, smiling in satisfaction when he made a shivery sound in his throat. And when she felt him, hard and ready, pressing against her pelvis, Meredith couldn't hold out for even another second.

She put her palms under each of his ears, feeling his stubble under her hand. "Derek, I need you."

"I need you, too," he said.

Meredith hooked her legs around his waist, and took in a shaky breath when she felt him against her. And when he pushed into her, slow and gentle, she thought she might die from the sensation. Literally, curl over and die. Her hands went to his hair almost instinctively, and she gripped her fingers in his curls. "Oh, Derek," she gasped.

Derek looked at her, his eyes concerned and loving and passionate all rolled into one. "You okay?" he asked, swallowing thickly.

"Mhm," she hummed. "You?"

"God, yes," Derek groaned. He dropped his forehead against hers. "I'm... you... feel amazing."

Meredith wiggled her hips, her toes curling in mind-numbing pleasure when she shifted down, all of her nerves ignited. "Holy. Yeah. You. You too," she breathed, her brain barely able to form a coherent thought, let alone actual speech. "Move, please," she begged.

"Hmm, okay."

Derek's lips found hers again, and they began moving together, syncing their rhythm within seconds like it had been since day one. On their first night together, and now, five years later. They knew every gasp and moan and groan, and how to elicit them from one another. It was like a tug of war, and they always made the game last as long as they could, dragging out the pleasure until it was impossible to go even a second longer without snapping. And even tonight, they reveled in what they could do to the other. Five weeks was longer than they'd ever gone without, and when they finally gave into the pleasure, they weren't sure they'd ever be able to move again.

Meredith lay with her head on Derek's chest, her fingers toying with the small patch of hair between his pectorals, trying to catch her breath and blink her vision back into focus. "Holy," she panted. "Crap."

Derek laughed hoarsely, his arm around her shoulders. "Ditto," he said, staring up at the ceiling.

"Better than doing... it on... the washer?" Meredith asked playfully, her breaths of air warm against his skin.

"Yes," he said. He kissed the top of her head, then rolled her on top of him. "That was incredible."

"And here I thought the whole 'sex is better after baby' thing was a myth. Guess I was wrong," she giggled, leaning down and kissing him hard before she tumbled off of him, onto her side. "I'm gonna go peek in on Lilly. I'll be right back." She grabbed her robe off the back of the door, turning around when she felt his eyes on her.

"Checking out my ass?" she asked, letting him have a once over of her body before she slipped it over her shoulders and tied it.

Derek grinned, unashamed. "Actually, I was."

Meredith laughed, his favorite noise carrying down the hall as she went to check on their baby. She came back a minute later, giving him a thumbs up. "Still sleeping away," she said, flinging her robe onto the wicker chair in the corner, then crawling back into bed.

"Really?"

"Really," Meredith affirmed. She straddled his hips as he sat up, and she landed with a soft thud in his lap.

"You know, peed-on sheets, annoying squirrels and baby gas aside, I think this was a pretty damn good anniversary," Derek said, hugging her naked torso against his.

Meredith smiled at him, her arms draped over his shoulders. "Kinda perfect," she said.

"It was," Derek said softly. "So, should we risk round two?"

She pushed him onto his back with one finger, and he had his answer.


	115. Figuring Out the Future

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. I just wish I did.**

**Thanks so much for your continuous patience with me. It means so much. Birthday shout-out to Lexie, a friend of mine, loyal reader, and one of the most awesome people in the MerDer fandom! :)  
**

It was a quarter past seven in the morning when Meredith was pulled from a dream she was having. She was pinned against the wall in the shower, her legs wrapped around Derek's waist. Her eyes were practically rolling back into her head because of the mind numbing pleasure he was giving her. Water rained down on them, dripping off the ends of their hair. Hot, slippery, and steamy. And just as she was about to reach her peak, the sound of Lilly crying woke her up. The shower, Derek, and the impending orgasm, gone in under a second.

She blinked her eyes open as they adjusted to the light, wrapping her arm around Lilly and pulling her close. "You okay, Lillybug?" Meredith asked against the baby's cheek, soft against her lips. She felt the fullness in her breasts, a signal that Lilly was hungry. "Okay, I'm up. I'll feed you."

Meredith sighed at Derek's empty side of the bed. He had been at work since yesterday morning, and was on-call last night. Even with a newborn at home, she knew that his overnight shifts were tougher on him than her. She could handle diapers and baths and laundry by herself with ease; being away from home, away from Lilly, was the hard part. Meredith knew he missed Lilly when he was at the hospital, more than he'd like to admit. It was an adjustment that would get easier over time, but right now, it sucked. And with her own maternity leave over next week, Meredith knew going back would be more agonizing on her than labor was.

She held the baby to her breast, and Lilly latched on like a pro. Mornings like this had become so routine over the last few weeks that she couldn't imagine _not_ waking up like this, just lounging in bed with Lilly. She wasn't ready to give that up. She didn't know if she would ever be ready.

Meredith smiled down at her daughter, studying everything about the little person in her arms. Her long, dark eyelashes that fanned her cheeks when she closed her eyes. The thick hair on top of her head, identical to Derek's. The vibrant blue of her eyes, already with flecks of green. The indentation of each knuckle, and the symmetry of every tiny fingernail. The rosy pink hue of her lips shaped exactly like Meredith's, and the way they puckered when she nursed or sucked her thumb. Toes the size of peas, tiny feet with little arches, skinny legs and chubby thighs, and a barely-there birthmark on the underside of her right arm that she and Derek had discovered a few days before. Every minuscule detail of Lilly was perfect.

Lilly looked up at her, her eyes content and trusting. She didn't sign up to be the daughter of two surgeon parents, and she wasn't going to be a victim of high powered careers, like Meredith was. Lilly became the top priority from the second she and Derek saw the plus sign on the pregnancy test, and that hadn't changed.

"Mommy and Daddy are going to figure something out," Meredith said, rubbing Lilly's hand with her finger. She felt her eyes burn with tears and she sniffled. "I promise, we'll figure something out."

She glanced over to check the clock on her nightstand when she saw the two framed pictures she kept there. The one of her four year old self in the wagon, Thatcher holding onto the handle, Ellis leaning against the tree in the background, disinterested in her daughter's happiness at her birthday gift. That was her mother, the kind of mother Meredith vowed never to be. Then there was the picture of her, Derek, and Lilly on the day Lilly was born, looks of genuine, absolute joy on both of their faces, the kind of parents they wanted to be. Ones that loved their daughter above all else.

Meredith heard the front door open and Charlie lifted his head off the bed, his ears perking up when he heard the noise. "Daddy's home," Meredith told Lilly, wiping her eyes.

Seconds later, she heard the sound of his feet climbing the steps and walking down the hall. Derek pushed open the bedroom door, greeting them both with a smile. "Hey," he said through his yawn.

"Hi," Meredith said softly.

The two days' worth of stubble and the messy, unkempt hair that was normally so perfectly coiffed told Meredith how exhausted he was. He crawled onto the bed, careful not to jostle Lilly as she nursed, and leaned against the headboard. As he was about to speak, he noticed the tears pooled in her eyelashes, and he frowned. "What's wrong?"

Meredith shook her head. "Nothing, it's just..." She let out a sigh. "You're tired. We can talk later."

"No, Mer, come on. Please," Derek said. "Just tell me."

"I've just been thinking about going back to work. And I don't know if—Derek, I don't know if I can," she admitted with relief. "How can I go back to work and just leave her?" Meredith's voice broke and she dropped her head into her free hand.

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple. "Meredith," he whispered against her skin.

"I don't know what we're gonna do. I know I need to go back to work, but the thought of putting her in daycare or hiring a nanny is... I'm not gonna do that," Meredith said. "That's what my mother did to me after we moved, and I won't do that to Lilly."

"I don't want to do that either," Derek agreed, tucking loose strands of hair behind Meredith's ear. "We'll figure something out. We're gonna do what's best for Lilly."

Meredith sniffled, reaching for a tissue on her nightstand. "I knew having a baby and having a job wouldn't be easy, but..."

"We didn't think it'd be this hard, either," Derek finished for her.

"Yeah."

Derek pursed his lips and looked down at Lilly, watching as she gently nursed, eyes closed peacefully, her hand resting atop Meredith's breast. He smiled, then looked back up at Meredith. "I'll stay home with her."

"What?" she asked.

"I'll stay home with her," Derek said. Meredith looked at him like he had three heads and he continued. "If I stayed home, you could finish your residency on time. After that, you'd be an attending and you'd have a better schedule. Mer, I'm serious."

Meredith blinked. "I... could you even do that?"

"Yeah. I mean, I could always work a few hours a week. Maybe take a weekend shift once in a while when you'd be home. I'd only schedule surgeries for times when I know you were off, so one of us would always be here with Lilly," Derek said.

"I'm a neuro resident, though. And you're the head of neuro. How would that work?" Meredith asked.

"Nelson and Weller are neuro attendings, too. You could scrub in on their surgeries and learn just as much as you would if you were with me," Derek pointed out. "And if there comes a time when both of us absolutely have to work, we have plenty of friends who would look after Lilly for a few hours. Bridget only works days, so if we're in a pinch, she's there, and you know she's willing to help. Plus, there's Molly and your dad. They live twenty minutes away. And really, spending a few hours away from us a few times a month isn't going to scar her for life. But again, that would only be on rare occasions. Other than that, I'd be home with her. And if I'm not, you will be."

Meredith frowned, a feeling of guilt churning in her stomach. "Derek, I can't ask you to do that. You love your job. I don't want you to have to sacrifice your own career for mine," she said.

"I do love my job," Derek agreed. "But I love you and Lilly more. And if it comes to choosing, I choose you two. Like I said, this wouldn't have to be a permanent thing. This time next year, you'll be an attending with a lighter schedule. You'll work less and make more, two of the perks that come with the navy scrubs," he chuckled.

"Yeah, next year I'll be making more. But now? Derek, I make crap money. Even if you still did a couple surgeries a week, could we get by on that?" she asked, her mind spinning with all of the logistics and plans and what-ifs.

"Don't worry about the money. Between both of us working, even if I cut back ninety percent of my work hours, and what we have saved, we'll be more than fine. We can do this, Meredith. We can make it work," Derek promised, smiling at her.

Meredith said nothing and bit her lip, glancing down at Lilly. Derek noticed her hesitation, so he reached for her hand. "Mer, your job is just as important to me as my own. You deserve to have the career you worked so hard for. And if I can help with making that happen, I'm gonna do it."

She turned her head toward him, tears welled in her eyes against her will. "You'd really do this for me?"

"Meredith, yes," Derek said.

"You don't even need to sleep on it? Because really, I don't want you to regret it—or resent me. This is... it's a big decision and—"

Derek cut off what was sure to be a ramble with a kiss. "Meredith, Lilly is my daughter, and you're my wife. Being a surgeon is... it can't even compete with that. Ten, twenty years from now, I want us to look back and know that we did what was best for Lilly. And what's best for her is having her parents around, not daycare, not a nanny. Us," he said, taking hold of Lilly's bare foot and smiling at the ten little toes he counted when she was born.

"I know. I think so, too," she said.

"So, let's do it, then."

A flicker of a smile twitched on Meredith's lips. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Derek wrapped his arms around her and hugged her to him, careful not to squish Lilly in between. He kissed above her ear. "It's gonna be great, I promise."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. She let out a breath as she felt the anxiety lift off her shoulders like heavy weights. "I was gonna talk to you about this weeks ago, but I kept putting it off. That was stupid, I guess," she managed to laugh.

"Why didn't you say anything sooner?" he asked.

"I don't know. I guess I just liked living in our happy baby bubble where work didn't exist," Meredith admitted. "And I didn't want to stress you out, either. Your leave was shorter than mine, and I wanted you to enjoy every second, because I knew it wouldn't last."

"You can always talk to me. About anything, whenever you want," Derek said. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Derek leaned down and kissed Lilly's forehead gently. "You too, Lillybug."

"Okay, how do we do this then? I mean, the Chief is probably going to be pissed," Meredith said, another knot forming in her stomach when she realized what kind of impact Derek not being the head neuro honcho would have on the hospital.

"No, he won't," Derek said. "He saw what your mother did, and it was partly his fault. If there's one thing he'd do for us—_for you_—it's this. Richard's not your father, but he loves you like a daughter. And he loves Lilly. And not to make him sound bad or me sound cocky, but he also loves the money I bring in for the hospital. Believe me, he'd rather have me lighten my schedule than have me not work there at all. He'll help us out with this, Mer. Honestly, it's the least he can do to make things right by you."

"I just, I need you to be sure about this. If you're not okay with it, I'll stay home with her. I'm already out of the running for chief resident because of my time off—not that I really care. Obviously, Lilly is more important than me becoming a glorified boss whose job is dealing with whiny interns and piles of paperwork. I don't want that, anyway," Meredith said.

"Meredith, I want to do this for us. I'm positive. Please don't feel guilty or worry that I'll resent you, because I won't," Derek said. "This isn't the 50s, and I don't expect you to give up your career just because we have a baby. I wouldn't have suggested staying home with her if I wasn't sure."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He smiled at her. "Besides, being a stay-at-home dad is trendy nowadays. That wins me coolness points with Lilly," he chuckled.

Meredith laughed. "That's true," she said. She felt Lilly pull away from her breast and smiled down at her daughter. "All done?" she asked her, wiping the corners of her lips.

Derek reached for the baby and hugged her to his chest. "I missed you, Princess," he said, patting her back to burp her. "How about it? Want Daddy to stay home with you while Mommy works for her shiny, new scrubs?"

Lilly took hold of his shirt with her little hand and yawned, her chin against his shoulder. Derek kissed her cheek. "I don't think she objects to that."

"You'd bring her up to see me every day, right?" Meredith asked as her eyes became blurry again, smiling at Lilly when she turned her head upon hearing Meredith's voice.

"Every day. Ten times a day, if you want. Seriously, we'll be up there so much you'll be sick of us," he joked, his face sobering when he saw her tears. "Mer, it's all gonna work out."

"I just don't want us to turn into Thatcher and Ellis, where I'm too busy to spend five minutes with her between surgeries, and she barely knows who I am. I mean, my dad potty trained me by himself. I doubt my mom was even involved at all. My dad was there for my first day of school; she wasn't. He's the one who went to the playground with me on the weekends, and checked for monsters under my bed, and tucked me in at night. I have no memories of my mom doing any of that, even once. That's not the kind of mom I want to be," Meredith said as she wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt.

Derek shook his head. "Meredith, listen to me. It'll be a cold day in hell before we ever let that happen. We are not your parents, and you are _not_ your mother. You were secondary to the adults in your life. They did what they wanted to do, and you suffered because of it. Every day, I wish I could change that. But Mer, you and I both know that'll never happen with Lilly. The fact that you're so concerned should tell you we have nothing to worry about. We both love her, and she'll always be the most important part of our lives. Her, and the next kid we have down the line. Nothing's gonna change that, especially not work," he said.

Meredith leaned into him, her head resting next to Lilly's on Derek's shoulder. "Okay," she said.

"You trust me on this one?"

She smiled. "Yeah. I do," she said. "I might just need you to tell me that every morning for the next year."

"I can do that," Derek grinned.

"Thank you."

Derek scooted forward and laid back in bed, Lilly on his chest, both of their eyelids heavy with sleep. Meredith laid back down, too, and draped her arm over Derek's torso. "We can call Richard later to hash out the details. For now, let's just sleep," he said, yawning.

"Okay," Meredith agreed as she caught his yawn.

Lilly's thumb went to her mouth and she stretched out her other hand toward Meredith, perhaps her tiny baby way of reassuring Meredith that everything was going to be okay. Meredith smiled, letting Lilly grab hold of her finger. She held onto it, then closed her bright blue eyes, her rounded cheek against Derek's chest.

"I'm right here, Lilly. I'll always be here," she whispered.

...

Meredith fretted with her watch as she and Derek walked down the corridor toward the Chief's office the next day. He had agreed to meet with them during Derek's lunch break, so Meredith drove up with Lilly so they could discuss Derek taking time off so Meredith could finish her residency on time. And as much as she knew that Richard was ultimately on their side, and would be willing to help, Meredith was still nervous. Derek was the go-to neurosurgeon not only in the US or on the West coast, but one of the best in the world, and the news that he was taking extended leave to be a stay-at-home dad probably wouldn't bode well for the hospital or its revenue. Of course, Meredith knew all of that was trivial. Prestige and paychecks didn't hold a candle to Lilly or her well-being. But still, Meredith had butterflies in her stomach. Cruel, merciless butterflies that hadn't stopped flapping their enormous wings since yesterday.

Derek couldn't help but smile when he saw her obviously flustered she was, and he reached for her hand. "Mer, deep breaths. This is Richard we're talking about. The man would do anything for you," Derek said, holding Lilly in his arm.

"I know, I just... it isn't like we're asking for a three day weekend. You basically taking a year off, give or take a few hours a week isn't exactly something he's going to be cheerful about," Meredith pointed out.

"He might not be cheerful about it, but he's not a heartless monster. We're doing what's best for our family, and he'll understand that," Derek said as they reached his office door. "Ready?"

She nodded. "Yeah, okay."

Derek knocked on the door, then opened it. "Hi, Richard," he greeted.

The chief looked up from a pile of paperwork and smiled when he saw the three of them. "Oh, good, I've been expecting you. Come on in," he said, gesturing to the chairs on the other side of his desk. "How've you been, Meredith? I haven't seen you since the baptism."

"I'm doing great; thank you, sir," Meredith said. "Just enjoying the last of my leave before I have to come back."

"Would you like to hold Lilly?" Derek asked him.

Richard's eyes lit up like a child on Christmas morning, and he looked from Lilly to the two of them. "May I?"

"Of course," Derek said, gently passing Lilly into his arm.

Lilly blinked up at him, but made no protest. Her thumb traveled to her mouth, and she looked around the Chief's office curiously. Richard smiled down at her. "I can't get over how much she looks like you did when you were this age, Meredith. It's incredible," he said, his face practically beaming.

"Yeah, my dad said that, too," Meredith replied. "Well, minus her hair, anyway. That's still Derek's."

"Beautiful; absolutely beautiful," Richard complimented.

"Thank you," Derek said, putting his hand on the small of Meredith's back when he saw her rolling her watch nervously around her wrist once again.

"So, what did you need to talk to me about? Is everything alright?" Richard asked as he took a seat behind his desk, Lilly still cradled in his arm.

They both took their seats opposite of him, and Meredith glanced over at Derek, her facial expression asking him to speak. Derek nodded in agreement, reaching for Meredith's hand. "Yeah, everything's fine. We just, uh, we wanted to talk to you about Meredith coming back to work," he began.

"You're slated to come back on Monday, right?" Richard asked.

"Well, yes, but..." Meredith said.

"If you were interested in getting more time off, I'll see what I could do for you. But then you may not be on track to finish you residency next July," Richard said.

"Actually, that's what we wanted to discuss," Derek cut in. "While Meredith is working toward finishing residency, we decided that I was going to stay home with Lilly—which we realize is a big decision."

Richard leaned back in his chair. "I see," he said.

"Obviously, this wouldn't be permanent, and I don't want you to think I'm quitting. I'd just be significantly cutting back my hours. Actually, Meredith and I wanted to know if there was any way we could work out some sort of plan, where I'd be able to work the hours when she's off, maybe schedule my surgeries for designated hours during the week, hours when Meredith isn't working. The logistics of it all need to be worked out, but this is what we feel is best for Lilly," Derek said, his voice calm and confident when he spoke.

"Mhm," Richard nodded, running his fingers over his beard.

"After next year, I'll be an attending, and I'll have more control over my schedule. But residency is... it's grueling, and I want to finish on time," Meredith said.

"Which is why I suggested staying home with Lilly. Meredith shouldn't have to be the one that takes time off just because she's not as far along in her career as I am. That's actually _why_ we want to do it this way," Derek said.

"I understand it, I do," Richard concurred. "Lilly is your priority. That's how it should be."

"Derek and I feel the same way. And I don't mean to drum up the past. Whatever happened, happened. It's just... I'm not going to let what happened to me happen to Lilly. We don't want her bounced around between nannies and babysitters like I was, and barely ever see us. We want stability for her. She deserves that," Meredith said. "We realize this is a lot to ask."

Richard nodded slowly, mulling it all over in his head in silence. He pursed his lips before speaking. "Alright," he said.

"Alright?" Meredith asked, expecting anger, or at the very least, annoyance. Anything but _alright_.

"Well, I don't know how well it'll go over with the board, but we can figure something out," he agreed. He looked from the two of them down to Lilly, then back. "I can't change your childhood, Meredith, but if I can help make sure Lilly has the childhood she deserves—the one you should've gotten—then I'm willing to help you make that happen."

Meredith felt her eyes prick with tears, cursing her damn hormones for unleashing them at very inopportune times. She wiped them away with her finger. "I, um... thank you," she said genuinely, feeling Derek squeeze her hand.

"Thank you, Chief," Derek echoed, glancing at Meredith when she squeezed his hand back.

"You understand that we'll have to negotiate a change of salary, Derek?" the Chief said.

"Yes, sir," Derek nodded.

Richard shifted Lilly to his other arm, and smiled when she stopped sucking her thumb briefly to yawn. "And next July, you'll both be back to work?"

"Yes," Meredith said.

"But you'd still like to coordinate alternating schedules?" the Chief assumed.

"Well, that's the hope, but we know that this isn't a nine-to-five job, either. Emergencies happen, ORs get backed up, things get chaotic without warning. But as much as we can, yes, we'd like to do that," Derek said.

"I'm willing to accommodate you as much as I can. It won't be easy, but we can sit down and iron everything out when the time comes," Richard said.

"Thank you, sir," Meredith said.

"I appreciate you coming to me and asking me. I know that couldn't have been easy on you," Richard said. "With a job like this, it's easy to get caught up in the grind of it all; competition, surgeries, all of that. But you're parents now, and that changes everything."

"Exactly," Derek said.

"Well then, Derek, you and I can work out a temporary contract tomorrow. And Meredith, I'll see you on Monday," Richard said as he stood up from behind his desk. He extended his free arm and shook both of their hands.

"Thank you. Really, it's... you have no idea how grateful we are," Meredith said, taking Lilly when Richard passed the baby over into her arms.

Richard smiled at Meredith. "I know you are. And I'm glad I can help."

After they said their goodbyes, Derek and Meredith exited the Chief's office, relief washing over both of them as they walked around the corner.

"See? That wasn't so bad," Derek said.

Meredith laughed, pushing the button for the elevator so they could go to Derek's office for lunch. "Yeah, well, I still don't want to do it again."

"Luckily, we don't have to," he said.

They stepped into the elevator, and the doors closed behind them. Meredith held Lilly up and kissed her forehead. "It's official. Daddy can stay home with you," she said. She looked at Derek. "I feel like we should get the Chief something as a thank you gift. Would that be too much?"

"We could let him babysit Lilly," Derek chuckled. "He was smitten."

"Who wouldn't be? She's perfect," Meredith said, hugging Lilly to her chest. She wrinkled her nose when she smelled the telltale signs of a dirty diaper. "Well, right now, she's kind of smelly. But still, she's perfect."

"We can change her in my office," he said as the elevator doors opened again.

"She pooped in the tub this morning when I was giving her a bath. I think it's your turn," Meredith decided.

"Did she really?" Derek asked, unlocking his office door and turning the handle.

"Yes, she did. So then, she needed a second bath, and I needed a second shower," Meredith giggled, gently laying Lilly on the couch and pulling off her romper with little, yellow suns on it. "So, do you feel good about all this?"

"Yeah, I do. It'll be an adjustment at first, but we'll make it work," Derek said. He sat down on the other cushion and turned Lilly toward him so he could change her. "Do you feel okay about it?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, combing her fingers through Lilly's hair and smiling when Lilly looked up at her. "I'll be a wreck on Monday, but I think it'll get easier."

"You'll be okay. And like I said, Lilly and I will visit every day. We'll eat lunch, maybe watch surgeries from the gallery. It'll be fun," Derek said, smiling.

"I know. And I know you're perfectly capable, but I can't help but think that maybe she'll need me and I won't be there," Meredith said, holding up the baby's legs while Derek put a new diaper under her bottom. "She's so attached to us, you know? If she's crying and then she sees me, she stops crying, because she knows I'm her mom. I don't want her to think I disappeared, or that I don't care. I don't want to stress her out or get her upset because I'm not there."

"Mer," Derek said, frowning when he saw the sadness and guilt etched all over her face. "You'll still see her all the time. I know you'll be working a lot, but you'll see her every day."

"And what about nursing? I mean, she's fine with bottles, but I'd rather nurse. I can't explain it, bur nursing is just..."

Derek finished dressing Lilly, and Meredith picked her up. "It's something special between the two of you," Derek said.

"Yeah," Meredith said.

"You can still nurse her every morning before work. Plus, when we visit you at lunch, we can come up here and you can nurse her. You're only on-call one night a week unless there's an emergency or something, so you'll be home around six to nurse her at night. And you get days off. This doesn't mean we have to wean her," Derek said.

He wrapped his arm around her and she leaned into him. "Does this make me a terrible mom? Will Lilly hate me when she's older because I went back to work?"

"Meredith, no. You're doing this _for _Lilly. If you were to hold off on finishing your residency, who knows when you'd go back—or if you even could. I mean, Richard has a lot of pull, but this is one of the most competitive teaching hospitals in the country. Who's to say they could even keep your job for you at all? You just have a year left as a resident, and finishing that will make it possible for you to be home more. Hell, we could even start up our own practice if we wanted to," Derek said.

"What?"

"I'm not saying we have to. I'm just saying that that's an option if we wanted to a few years down the line. You know, once Lilly and hypothetical baby number two are in school. We could set all of our own hours, book our surgeries for when we wanted," Derek shrugged as he fixed Lilly's hair clip.

"That might be nice," Meredith said as she pondered the idea.

"One of the possible perks after you finish your residency and why it's so important for you to finish," Derek said.

Meredith raised her head to kiss his neck. "Hmm, I know. I just have mommy guilt."

"I know. And that's your right. But please, don't think for a second that you're a bad mom, or that Lilly would think any less of you. After my dad died, my mom had to work two jobs and still raise five kids. I never, not even for a split second, thought any less of her. I'm grateful to her every day for that. She did what she had to do for her kids, and that's exactly what you're doing for Lilly. It's just getting over the hump for the next year. After that, it'll be easier on both of us," Derek said.

"Being an attending better be as awesome as you're making it sound," Meredith teased him, gently rubbing Lilly's back.

Derek chuckled. "Believe me, it is. Think of it as being upgraded from coach to first class... much more leg room, comfy leather seats, in-flight meals."

"Is this going to end with a Mile High Club reference?" she laughed.

"No, you just have a porny mind," Derek countered.

"I can't help it. Once my beast started being fed again, I crave it all the time," Meredith said. "Which I realize sounds really dirty, but it's true."

He smirked, pulling Lilly's sock back on after she'd nearly kicked it off her foot. "Hmm, really?"

"Really," she echoed. "I had a shower sex dream yesterday before I woke up. I planned on having shower sex with you last night, but I was so frazzled about today that I fell asleep."

"Tonight, then," Derek grinned. "You and me, steamy, hot shower sex to help us unwind."

"And the bendy thing?"

"And the bendy thing," Derek agreed.

"Okay, then."

"Does the prospect of the bendy thing make your day a little better?" he asked, noticing the small smile pulling at her lips.

Meredith looked at him and put her hand on his cheek, leaning forward to kiss him. "Yes, it did."


	116. Meredith Goes Back

**Disclaimer: Grey's doesn't belong to me.**

Meredith rubbed her eyes as she walked down the hall toward the resident lounge after changing into her scrubs in the bathroom. Being back to work felt so oddly familiar and still so foreign. The hospital used to be her life. Surgery after surgery; hours and days spent without leaving the building. Now though, she was pretty certain she'd give all that up to be at home with Lilly and Derek. She knew coming back to work was the right decision, but she couldn't shake the feeling of guilt that weighed on her shoulders.

She turned the handle and entered the lounge, greeted by her friends who were getting ready. "Welcome back!" George said.

Meredith smiled at them as she set her bag down on the bench. "Thank you."

"So, how's it feel?" Alex asked.

"Well, I kind of feel like the world's crappiest mom right now, so not too good," Meredith answered honestly, trying to bite back tears that were in her eyes since she left the house this morning. "I just need today to go by fast. After today, I'm hoping it'll get easier." She wiped at her eyes, and started to maneuver her belongings back in her cubby that she'd taken home with her during her maternity leave.

Izzie frowned. "Mer, Derek is an amazing father. Hell, he could probably run a daycare by himself. Lilly is gonna be just fine," she said.

"Yeah, I know. It's just hard. As much as I want to be here, I want to be home with her," Meredith said, smiling when she saw one of Lilly's ultrasound pictures still taped to the back wall of her cubby. Even a 3D, in-utero photo of Lilly was enough to brighten her mood.

"Aren't they coming up here at lunch?" Cristina asked as she shrugged on her white jacket.

"Yeah. That's all that's getting me through the next four hours," Meredith said, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. "Until then, I just want to work."

"Morning, people," Bailey said as she walked into the resident lounge. "Welcome back, Grey."

"Thank you, Dr. Bailey," Meredith replied.

"I know you're probably all scheduled to be scrubbed in somewhere, but we've got a trauma rolling into the pit, so I need you all down in the ER to assess the incoming," she said.

"Any word on what happened?" Cristina asked as they all followed her out of the room and down the hall.

"Tailgate party gone bad," Bailey said.

"It's 8:15 in the morning," Alex laughed.

Bailey waved her arms in a shrug. "Must be very loyal fans, then," she said sarcastically.

"See? A nice, possibly drunken, Monday morning trauma. That'll lift your spirits, right?" Cristina asked, patting Meredith's arm.

"Yeah," Meredith said, her voice barren of any enthusiasm.

Cristina pulled her aside as they all waited for the elevator to arrive, and looked at her friend, concerned. "Hey, are you okay? Really, Mer, Lilly's fine. I mean, I'm not one to praise McDreamy for his unwavering perfection, but he is a good dad."

"Obviously, I know that," Meredith snapped. She sighed, shaking her head slightly. "Sorry, I'm not mad. I'm just... this isn't an easy day, okay?"

"Okay," Cristina accepted, backing off. "I'm here if you need to talk."

"I know," Meredith said softly.

The six of them stepped into the elevator, and the doors closed behind them. The whole way down to the ER, Meredith silently hoped that whatever was in store for her downstairs was enough to keep her mind occupied, and not focused on her six week old baby at home. When the doors opened again, she nodded in satisfaction. Normally, she hated the chaotic ER, but today, she welcomed the hustle and bustle with open arms.

"Alright, O'Malley and Karev, wait outside for more incoming; Izzie, take Trauma 1; Meredith, Trauma 2; Yang, 3. Looks like we've got lots of burn victims," Bailey said, coughing at the charred smell mixed with the scent of alcohol. "With a side of booze."

Meredith scrunched her nose, trying to get accustomed to the smell that she'd probably be contending with for the next few hours. She walked into the trauma room, ready to walk right back out the door when she saw a baby on the table, covered in soot, and crying. Meredith took a breath to regain composure, then immediately began assessing the infant.

"What happened?" Meredith asked a young man, who she presumed to be the baby's father.

"We were at a tailgating party for the baseball game this afternoon. The dude who parked next to us was making burgers when the grill just blows up. I guess there was too much gasoline or something," the man said.

"Is this your son?" Meredith asked, checking the baby's airway. She breathed a sigh of relief when she noticed it was free of soot, then put her stethoscope in her ears.

"Yeah. Ryan. Ryan Krauss."

"How old is he?" she asked.

"He turned one in, uh, January," the man said.

"Can I ask, what was your eighteen month old son doing at a tailgate party at eight in the morning?" she asked him as she listened to the baby's heart and breathing.

"My girlfriend had to work, so I just took him with me," he said. "She's gonna kill me."

As a way to keep her frustration with the man in check, Meredith focused on comforting the crying baby, whose father seemed more interested in texting someone on his phone. "It's okay, Ryan. You're gonna be okay," she soothed, gently examining the infant's body for signs that he may have been burned. "Was your son anywhere near the grill fire?"

"A few feet away. He was in a stroller."

Meredith spotted some minor heat rashes on the baby's calves and looked over to the nurse who was taking down notes. "Can you page Dr. Sloan to take a look at his legs, please?"

"I just saw him. I'll try to get him in here," the nurse said, setting her chart down and leaving the trauma room.

"Dr. Sloan is a burn specialist. These don't look serious, but I want him to check before I start treating your son," Meredith said. "Now, where were you when this happened?"

"I was putting ice in the cooler. I was a few feet away," he said.

Meredith felt the blood pulsing in her ears when she smelled the scent of alcohol on his breath, and stared him in the eye. "Sir, have you been drinking?"

The man shrugged. "Just one of two. I'm not drunk or anything."

"So, you were drinking while well aware that your child is under your care?" Meredith assumed.

"What's the big deal? I told you, I'm not drunk," he upheld.

"Okay, sir, I need you to leave the room," Meredith said, pointing to the door.

"What's going on in here?" Mark asked as he walked inside the trauma room, noticing the angered look on Meredith's face.

"Eighteen month old with heat rash on his legs after a grill blew up at a tailgating party. I wanted you to take a look. I'm also going to call up to respiratory to make sure his lungs sound clear. I didn't find any soot, but I'm not taking any chances. And I'd rather not put him under for intubation until I know," Meredith said. "Also, the boy's father has been drinking."

"Woah, what's your problem? Want me to take a damn breathalyzer? I'm not drunk," the guy said, raising his voice in annoyance.

Like Meredith had done, Mark pointed to the door. "Sir, you need to leave. I don't give a damn if it was a sip of beer or you chugged a keg. Dr. Grey and I need to assess your son. Now, leave the room or I'll have security do it for you," Mark said firmly, but keeping his demeanor calm.

"Fine, whatever. The reception in here sucks, anyway," he finally gave in, pulling the door open and walking toward the ambulance bay outside.

"Son of a bitch shouldn't even have kids," Mark said as he surveyed the baby's legs carefully so he wouldn't irritate the red, bumpy skin. "What's his name?"

"Ryan," Meredith said, dialing the nurses' station on the phone so respiratory could be called down.

"Alright, Ryan. It's okay, buddy," Mark said. He waited for Meredith to hang up the phone before he talked to her. "Some cold compresses on his legs should make the irritation go down. If it were more serious, I'd call up to pharm. for some ointment, but I don't want to trap in any heat."

Meredith nodded. "Okay."

"What the hell was a one and a half year old doing at a tailgating party at eight in the morning?" Mark asked.

"Same thing I said. And I wanted to punch him in the face when I smelled beer on him," Meredith said, shaking her head in disgust as she rummaged through the cabinet for gauze.

"First day back after maternity leave, and you get to deal with parental idiocy right out of the gate," Mark said. "Fun, huh?"

"Oh, yeah," Meredith said as she filled a clean basin with cold water. She hopped up onto the exam table and propped the infant on her lap. "Hey, Ryan. I'm gonna put these on your legs, okay?" she said, dipping the gauze into the water and draping the pieces over his legs.

Mark pulled a pen from his pocket and began scrawling down diagnosis and treatment notes on the chart, noticing the weariness of Meredith's eyes. "You look sad," he said.

Meredith wiped some of the black grill charcoal from Ryan's hand. "I was crying by the time I backed out of the driveway this morning," she admitted.

"It's only your first day. You knew that wasn't gonna be easy," Mark said.

"I didn't think it'd be this hard," Meredith said, letting the baby grab hold of her finger.

"That's the same thing Derek said on his first day back."

She smiled slightly. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"How did he make it through?" Meredith asked.

"He pulled out his phone every thirty seconds to look at pictures of Lilly," Mark said, signing his name to the chart and flipping it closed. "You just gotta get through today. On Derek's second day back, he was a little better, and better than that on the third day. I guarantee that by Friday, you won't cry when you pull out of the driveway."

"You think?"

"Absolutely," he nodded. "Tell you what, if I'm wrong, Friday's cup of coffee is on me."

"And a muffin?" she leveraged.

Mark laughed. "Deal."

"Okay," Meredith agreed, reaching out her hand and shaking his.

"In the meantime, I'll call up to social services. I want them to talk to Father of the Year outside," Mark said. He smiled at the baby on Meredith's lap and patted his foot. "Good luck, Ryan."

As Mark left the room, the respiratory specialist, Dr. Weston, entered, a dry, humorless man in his fifties that Meredith didn't like to associate with unless she had to. He flipped through the papers in the chart before speaking, and looked at Meredith. "No soot in his throat?"

"No. But I didn't want to take any chances. His breathing sounds normal, but I wanted a second opinion before I discharged him," Meredith said.

Dr. Weston coaxed the baby's mouth open with his finger, and examined his throat with a tongue depressor and a light. "Throat looks normal," he said before taking a listen to Ryan's lungs and heart. "Airways sound clear."

"Should I do a portable chest X-ray, just to be safe?" Meredith asked, feeling Ryan ball up the fabric of her scrub pants and lean into her.

"That's not necessary," Dr. Weston replied. "He can be discharged."

Meredith held her tongue, and simply nodded. "Okay," she said.

Dr. Weston left without another word, and Meredith rolled her eyes. "Goodbye to you, too..." she said sarcastically. She gently laid Ryan down on the table and hopped off, much to his chagrin. He started to fuss, and Meredith smiled at him. "Hey, hey. You're okay," she said. "I don't care what he says. I'm doing the X-ray anyway, Ryan."

She pulled the machine out from the corner of the room, and positioned it over the baby, then draped his body with lead blankets everywhere but over his chest and face. "I'm just taking your picture. It won't hurt," she said, mostly for the sake of conversation with him, knowing that he didn't understand what she meant.

After turning it on, Meredith brushed her finger over his cheek. "This will only take a second, so make sure you hold still, okay?" she said. She pressed the hand-held button attached to the X-ray machine, then snapped the photo. "Good job, buddy. All done."

Meredith took off the lead blankets, and removed the film tray before wheeling the X-ray machine back to its spot. Rather than risk leaving Ryan alone in the room for even a second, she flagged down Tyler, passing by in the hall. When he entered the room, Meredith smiled at him. "Hi. Can you take this up to radiology to have it printed, please?" she asked, handing him the film tray. "I can't leave him here."

"Yeah," Tyler said, taking it from her. "I'll ask someone to come in sit with him, so you can move on to other cases if you want."

"Okay, thank you," Meredith nodded as she re-dipped the gauze strips into the cold water.

Tyler left and a nurse named Shannon came in seconds later. "Tyler said you needed me to look after him?" she said.

"That would be great; thank you. His dad is probably being questioned by social services, and honestly, I don't want him in here, anyway," Meredith said, letting go of Ryan's hand.

When Ryan realized that Meredith was leaving, his lip quivered, and he let out a wail, his little face scrunching up in wrinkles in much the same way Lilly's did when she was upset. Meredith's stomach turned at the sad sound, and she let go of the door handle, letting it close. "I'll stay with him," she told Shannon.

"Are you sure?" Shannon asked.

"Yeah," Meredith replied, walking over to Ryan and rubbing his hand comfortingly. She smiled at Shannon. "Thank you, though. I appreciate it."

"Sure," Shannon said, before leaving the room.

Meredith took a clean wash cloth from the cabinet under the sink, then ran it under some warm water. "Since you don't want me to leave, how about we clean you up a little, okay?" she said. She rung out the cloth and sat back up on the table so she could hold him. "This isn't a very good day for you, huh?"

Ryan looked up at her, his blue eyes red-rimmed with tears, and he reached for her face. He pointed to his shirt and said something about Spongebob that Meredith couldn't quite understand, then cocked his head, as though he expected her to respond. "You don't say?" she joked, gently wiping his cheeks off.

"You know, I have a baby at home. You're older than she is, though. Her name is Lilly. Right now, she's home with her dad. He's probably teaching her how to cook an omelet or do a craniotomy or something," Meredith laughed. "He's a really good dad."

Her face became somber, and she hugged Ryan closer to her, his face leaning into her chest as he relaxed in her lap. "I'm sorry that your dad picked a booze-fueled tailgating party over taking care of you today. You didn't deserve that," Meredith said, peeking under the gauze to make sure the redness of his legs was gradually decreasing. "But it'll all work out. I'm gonna make sure you're safe, I promise."

Ryan yawned into her shirt and closed his eyes, his little body becoming more slack in her arms as he began to fall asleep. Meredith carefully continued to wipe him off, making sure every inch of him was clean before she tossed the rag into a nearby trashcan. Outside the window, there were people running around, and gurneys being wheeled in every direction, but with the door to the room closed, Meredith felt separated from all of it. It was just a dull hum of voices and movement, overshadowed by Ryan's breathing as he slept.

She watched as everyone outside the window worked, doctors doctoring in the ER, while she sat, secluded, holding a baby. Technically, she was on duty, treating a patient like everyone else, but it still felt different. Maybe she just wasn't totally back in sync with the rhythm of the hospital after being gone for so long. After being away for weeks, jumping right back into the chaos she had previously been so accustomed to wasn't so easy. Before, the hospital was home. And now, it felt like the place that kept her captive, away from what mattered most to her.

She glanced over at the clock on the wall. 8:57. Three hours until lunch. Three hours until Lilly.

One hour passed until Teddy and Arizona unexpectedly walked into the trauma room with Ryan's X-ray results, and Meredith knew something was wrong. She shifted the sleeping baby on her lap and swallowed thickly, waiting for whatever it was they had to say. "Are those his results?" she asked.

"Yeah. No smoke inhalation, but I did detect something else," Teddy said, putting the films up on the light box and turning it on. "See here?" she said as she pointed to Ryan's heart. "He has PDA."

"Persistent Ductus Arteriosus," Meredith said.

"It's usually detected at birth, but depending on what kind of medical care he had, it was obviously missed," Arizona explained. "The ductus of his heart didn't close properly after birth, and because the gap is still there, more blood goes to his lungs than usual. He's still young, so it probably wouldn't have been detected until he was a little older and more active. He'd be out of breath much faster than normal, and would probably get tired out easily."

"Shouldn't I have heard a murmur? I checked his heart, and so did Dr. Weston. Neither of us thought anything was abnormal," Meredith said, confused.

Teddy put her stethoscope in her ears. "It can be hard to detect unless you're really listening for it, and if he had no symptoms, you'd have to reason to suspect it," she said, listening to Ryan's heart. She concentrated intently for a few moments before nodding. "Yeah, it's there. Faint, but it's there."

Meredith frowned, feeling responsible for letting something so huge slip through the cracks. "I had no idea."

"The important thing is that we saw the abnormality on his X-ray, so now we can fix it," Arizona said.

"Well, I'm glad I decided to do it, then," Meredith said. "Dr. Weston said it wasn't necessary and that I could discharge him, but I wasn't going to risk it without being thorough."

"Good call, Grey," Teddy smiled, flipping the chart open. "Are his parents here so they can sign consent forms for surgery?"

"Sloan paged social services to talk to his dad. I haven't heard anything since," Meredith said.

Arizona raised her eyebrows in concern. "Dark haired guy in his early twenties? Baseball jersey?"

"Yes. Why?" Meredith asked, unsure of whether she really wanted the answer.

"He started a shouting match with the social services rep., and the police were called," Arizona said. "Apparently, it got kind of ugly."

Meredith sighed. "Perfect."

"You were the doctor originally assigned to him?" Teddy asked.

"Yeah," Meredith said. "His dad never gave me any information, though, other than the baby's name and age."

"He needs the surgery. Usually, this would be spotted on an ultrasound, and fixed a few weeks after birth, but he's already eighteen months old. The longer we wait, the greater risk of infection; not to mention all of the strain it's putting on his heart and lungs. I don't know if he has medical insurance or not. If not, I'm willing to do it pro bono," Teddy said.

"Me, too," Arizona agreed. She looked to Meredith. "Until any other family members show up, he's legally under your care. Are you available to scrub in?"

Meredith glanced at her watch. It was after ten o'clock. By the time the surgery was underway, it would be close to eleven. The surgery would be at least a few hours, plus monitoring him in recovery. Not even a miracle could make all of that happen by the time Derek was supposed to show up with Lilly at lunch. But she knew that if she was ever going to make it through residency, she had to reach her quota of OR hours. Passing over surgery on her first day back didn't exactly help with making that happen.

As much as it pained her to say it, Meredith had no choice. "I'll scrub in," she said.

"Okay," Teddy said as she, too, added to the notes that both Meredith and Mark had previously written. "We're supposed to be getting Hunt's OR when he's finished, which should be soon. Want to prep him, and we'll meet you up in pre-op in fifteen minutes?"

"Yeah. No problem," Meredith said.

Arizona smiled at her. "Good to have you back, Dr. Grey," she said before leaving the room behind Teddy.

"Yeah. It's good to be back," Meredith replied, pretty sure that felt like a lie. She pulled her phone from her pocket after they left, careful not to jostle Ryan with the hope that he would stay asleep until they gave him the anesthesia for his surgery. The little boy had gone through enough for one day, and she didn't see any point in upsetting him.

She pressed number one her phone, and it speed dialed home. The phone rang twice before Derek picked up. "Hey, Mer," he said, reading the caller ID.

"Hey," Meredith said. "How's Lilly doing?"

"She's good. She just had a diaper change and a bottle, and now she's having tummy time on the floor with me," Derek said. "How's your day been so far?"

"Let's just say I wish I was home, having tummy time with you two right now," Meredith said, brushing her hair away from her face.

Derek frowned on the other end. "That bad?"

"Yeah," Meredith answered honestly. She felt a lump in her throat, and she willed herself not to cry. If Derek knew she was upset, it would make him upset, too, and she didn't want that. "So, uh, I have to scrub in for surgery in fifteen minutes. One year old with a heart condition. I'm not gonna be out until mid-afternoon."

"So, no lunch date today?" he guessed.

"No lunch date today," she echoed.

"No big deal. It's just one day," Derek said.

"I know. I just miss you. I really wanted to see Lilly, so I could nurse her," Meredith said, another round of guilt churning her insides.

Derek smiled as Lilly blew bubbles with her mouth. "She took a bottle this morning without a problem. She didn't fuss at all. No gas, no spit up, nothing," he comforted her, knowing Meredith was hesitant about that.

"Good," Meredith said with relief. "Give her a kiss for me, okay?"

"You got it," Derek said, pressing kisses to Lilly's forehead. "Five kisses from Mommy, Lillybug."

Meredith smiled, overhearing the exchange. "Thank you," she said.

"Maybe it's a good thing that you're going into surgery. Time flies in the OR. And you're off at six. Plenty of time for you to come home and spend time with her," Derek said.

"I know," she said softly. "Love you guys."

"We love you, too."

"I'll call when I'm out of the OR."

"Okay. Talk to you later," Derek said.

"Bye," Meredith said, taking the phone away from her ear and ending the call. Rather than let herself get worked up over not getting to see her daughter until tonight, she scooped Ryan into her arms, and carried him upstairs to the pre-op herself. Lilly was safe and sound with Derek at home. Ryan had no one right now. And the least she could do was be the parent he needed, a promise to him she intended to keep.

...

Charlie barked in excitement as Meredith walked up the pathway toward the front door. It had only been eleven hours since she'd last been home, but it felt like an eternity. She pushed open the door and knelt down, petting Charlie as he spun in circles around her.

"Hey, buddy," she said, letting him lick her face. "How was your day, huh?"

Derek came into the foyer holding Lilly, and the minute Meredith saw her baby, she reached out for her. "Hi, Lilly," she said. She held her close to her chest, breathing in the top of her head that smelled like her flowery baby soap. "I missed you so much today, peanut."

"Hi," Derek said before he kissed her, letting his lips linger on hers longer than usual.

"Hmm, hi," Meredith murmured, kissing him back. As he went to pull away, Meredith pulled him toward her again. "I need a hug."

Derek chuckled, wrapping his arms around her, leaving enough room so that Lilly didn't get squished in between. "That I can do," he said, trailing his hands up and down her back. "On a scale of one to ten, how bad was it?"

"Seven, maybe eight," she shrugged. "Everything worked out. Just... a rough case, that's all."

"I have paninis toasting in the kitchen. Why don't we go eat, and you can tell me all about it?" Derek said, putting his hand on the small of her back.

"Paninis? Since when do we have a panini maker?" Meredith asked.

"Mark got us one for our wedding. I found it today buried in the back of the cabinet. Still unopened in the box," Derek laughed. "Figured I'd give it a try."

"Smells good," Meredith said as they entered the kitchen. She sat down at the table and Lilly turned into her, burying her face into Meredith's chest. "Are you hungry, Lillybug? I'm sorry I wasn't here today," she said, managing to unbutton her shirt with one hand.

After Meredith adjusted her nursing bra, Lilly put her hand on top of Meredith's breast and latched on. "Good job," Meredith encouraged, rubbing her finger over Lilly's cheek.

Derek came over to the table with two plates, a sandwich on each, and a side of pasta salad. "I hope these taste alright. I used turkey and cheese."

"Thank you," Meredith said.

"Water?" he asked.

"Sure," she nodded, biting into the sandwich. "This is amazing."

"Yeah?" Derek smiled, putting her glass of water next to her plate and taking a seat in the chair next to hers.

"Mhm. My day has improved a thousand percent in the last five minutes," Meredith said as she looked down at Lilly, who was sucking peacefully with her eyes closed.

"Spill," Derek said.

Meredith sighed. "This one year old comes into the ER with his dad because he was burned at a tailgating party. Mind you, this is eight in the morning. Then I smell beer on the guy, and social services are called, and then the police had to get involved. It was a mess. Anyway, I did an X-ray to check for smoke inhalation, even though Weston said not to, and it turned out he needed heart surgery. He's okay. The surgery went smoothly, and his grandma is getting custody for a while," she said.

Derek nodded. "That's good."

"I should be used to stuff like this. I guess I just see it all differently now. I can't imagine putting Lilly in danger. I mean, the baby was hurt. Not 'near death' hurt, but still hurt. All because his stupid father wasn't taking care of him. I can't just go to work, and expect things like that _not_ to affect me," Meredith said.

"I know," Derek said softly.

Meredith sniffled and wiped at her eyes. "I love what I do for a living. I love being a surgeon. But I don't know if I can do that every day; leave Lilly here and go to work. All I know is that I have to, so I need you to talk me back into it," she said before taking a sip of water.

"I'll do that every day if you need me to," Derek promised.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Just don't throw in the towel. I know it's hard. And it might be hard for a while, but it'll get better," Derek said. "Think about all you did today. If he had anyone else for a doctor, the baby might have been sent home with a serious heart condition _and_ a drunk father. But you were there, and you handled it. You got social services involved to protect him, and you saved his life by getting him the surgery he needed. You did that, Meredith."

Meredith smiled, and he kissed her temple. "We're doing the right thing," he said.

"And Lilly was okay today? She didn't seem upset or anything, or notice I wasn't here?" Meredith asked, spearing some pasta salad onto her fork.

"Nope. She was perfect. I don't think she cried all day," Derek chuckled.

"So she hasn't forgotten who I am?"

Derek laughed slightly. "Meredith, no. When she heard you talking to Charlie when you came in the house, she turned her head toward your voice. She knows exactly who you are, and how much you love her. You never have to worry about that."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder, combing her fingers through Lilly's hair. "Thank you, Derek."

"For what?"

"Always knowing what to say," Meredith said. "And the hugs. And for Lilly."

"I'm pretty sure Lilly was a two person effort."

"Yeah, well, we did good," she giggled.

Derek smiled into her hair. "Yes, we did."


	117. No Need for Wishes

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, Meredith and Derek would be allowed to be happy once in a while. So clearly, Grey's doesn't belong to me.  
**

Derek pressed Lilly's tiny bare hand into the pink ink pad, and then onto Meredith's birthday card, opened on the coffee table. "That's it. Keep your fingers spread," he said, gently pushing her hand onto the card, next to where he signed both of their names.

He pulled her hand away, smiling at how it turned out. "Beautiful," he said, taking a wipe from the pack and cleaning the ink off her hand. "Good job, Princess."

Derek glanced at his watch. One hour until Meredith's twenty-four hour shift ended at noon, which meant he had to start getting them both ready to go. He got up off the couch, Lilly cradled in his arm. "Alright, let's get you dressed," he said, heading toward the stairs. "You, Mommy and I are going out to lunch today, so how about we ditch the pajamas for something more fancy?"

Lilly just put her thumb in her mouth, seemingly unconcerned by whatever outfit Derek wanted to dress her in. Derek laughed. "Okay, I'll pick, then," he said, opening her closet doors. He shuffled through the rack, and pulled out a sleeveless dress. "How about this? Yellow, summery, flowery. I think Mommy picked this out when she was pregnant with you."

He laid Lilly down on the changing table and unsnapped her pajamas. "Today is all about Mommy. I know she's been working a lot, and that it's hard for her to be away from us, but she's gotten better in the last two weeks," he said, taking off her old diaper.

After cleaning her, Derek slid a fresh diaper under her bottom and fastened it around her waist. "You and I are doing just fine though. We have fun. Bottles whenever you want, always a clean diaper, our daily tummy time and Elmo's World," Derek said with a smile, slipping Lilly's dress over her head. "I never thought I'd be a semi-stay-at-home dad, but I really do love being home with you."

He leaned down to kiss Lilly's forehead, then reached for her sandals in the plastic bin under the changing table. "How about these? White, strappy? Mommy would approve, right?" he asked. "I think so."

Derek put her sandals on her tiny feet and secured the buckle, making sure they weren't too tight. "Not to brag, but I'm getting good at putting your outfits together. And doing your hair," he said, grabbing a white bow and clipping it on a tuft of her dark hair.

"Beautiful," Derek said, picking her up and holding her to his chest. "Ready to go? Maybe we can sneak Mommy out a little early."

Lilly looked up at him and he grinned. "Alright, then. You can be my partner in crime."

...

They arrived at the hospital right around noon, then walked toward the elevators to meet Meredith upstairs. It arrived just as he pushed the up button, and much to Derek's surprise, Meredith was inside, dressed and ready to go. "Hey," he greeted.

Meredith smiled as she stepped off, immediately reaching for Lilly. "Hey," she said. "Hi, peanut."

"Happy birthday," Derek said, putting his hands on her cheeks and kissing her.

"Mmm, thank you," Meredith replied. She took his hand, and they started heading toward the exit and back to the car. "Still taking me on a hot date?" she teased.

"Well, it's the end of July, so yes, temperature-wise; but considering Lilly is with us, we might have to save the steamy romance for tonight," Derek smirked, pulling his keys from his pocket.

Meredith laughed. "I can live with that," she said.

He unlocked the doors and slipped into the driver's seat, while Meredith secured Lilly into her car seat in the back. "So, did everyone decorate your cubby, even though you told them not to?"

"Of course. Izzie insists on doing it every year," Meredith said, getting into the passenger seat. "When I walked into the resident lounge to brush my teeth after I woke up this morning, there were already balloons and a birthday sign on it. But it was okay. My neuro surgery got rescheduled, so Mark let me assist on a hemiglossectomy. His gift to me."

"That makes lunch at Camparo's seem pretty lame," Derek joked as he backed out of the parking spot and drove toward the main road.

Meredith shook her head. "The last thing I ate was a breakfast bar and coffee five hours ago. I'm ready to chew my hand off. Believe me, I'd trade surgery for some fettuccine right now," she said. "How was Lilly last night?"

"She was good. She woke up twice to eat, and once for a diaper change. No problems," Derek said.

"I missed sleeping next to her. She's so warm and squishy, and she has that baby smell. I had to hug onto a pillow last night as a replacement. Not the same at all," she said.

"We can sleep in as late as you want tomorrow, all three of us," Derek said.

"Good. I've barely slept at all this week. And you and I haven't even had sex in eight days. Eight days, Derek. Not counting the five weeks after I had Lilly, that's probably the longest we've gone without. So yeah, we're having lots of birthday sex tonight," Meredith said.

"Shower, bed, counter top. You name it. You're the birthday girl," he grinned, checking his mirror as he switched lanes.

Meredith reached for his hand across the console. "Romantic," she said. "You're not working tomorrow night, right?"

"No, Sunday. I go in for two surgeries in the morning. I should be home by three," Derek said.

"So, we really get a whole uninterrupted Saturday to ourselves?" Meredith said, turning around to check on Lilly in her car seat. "This is probably my favorite birthday ever, especially because you're here now," she told her daughter.

Derek smiled. "This time last year, she didn't even exist. Not even an embryo."

"How weird is that?"

"Weird," Derek laughed.

"You were just a distant sperm and egg, Lillybug," Meredith said.

"Eww."

"What? It's true," she shrugged. "I miss being pregnant with her. I mean, going into week forty-one, I was getting a little antsy, but still. I even miss the way she'd headbutt me in the bladder and kick me in the ribs."

"That was incredible—not you being uncomfortable, but just... I don't know. Knowing that we made a person that moved and breathed and had tiny hands and feet. I understand the science of it, but the miracle part? I don't think I'll ever get over that," Derek said.

"Me either."

"And lucky for you, I fully intend on knocking you up again, so we can enjoy it all a second time," Derek said, glancing over at her and smiling.

Meredith giggled. "That's not part of your birthday present tonight, right? Because I think I'm good with one baby for now."

"No. At some point, yes. But not tonight," he assured her.

"Okay, good," Meredith said. "You know, Mark offered to watch Lilly this afternoon while we went out to lunch. Maybe we should've taken him up on that..."

"Oh, yeah? Why is that?" Derek asked.

"Because talking about birthday sex is making me horny, and I think it's culturally frowned upon to have sex in the car while your baby is in the backseat," Meredith teased.

"Replace sex with fettuccine and breadsticks. And cheese. Lots of parmesan cheese. Oh, and your favorite, chocolate mousse," Derek said.

"Mmm," she moaned, closing her eyes at the thought. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'd trade sex for all of that right now."

"Well, that's a nice kick in the ego," Derek said, feigning hurt.

"No offense. You know I always choose sex over food, just not when I'm starving. There will always be a special place in my heart for your penis," Meredith said before pausing. "Okay, I didn't mean for that to sound creepy and disgusting, I swear."

Derek smirked. "Believe me, I know where that special place is. I visit there often," he said.

"Okay, now you're just being mean," Meredith said.

"Sorry," Derek smiled as he turned right into Camparo's parking lot. He pulled into a parking spot close to the entrance, and cut the engine. "But we're here now, so we can put a pin in this conversation."

"Thank God," Meredith said, unbuckling her seatbelt. She looked to the backseat. "I guess we should bring the whole car seat in with us, so we can clip it to a high chair. They have high chairs here, right?"

"Yeah, I asked when I made the reservation," Derek said, both of them getting out of the car.

Meredith opened the backseat door and Derek unclipped the car seat from the base, then took it out, Lilly buckled inside. "Good. Although, I can't imagine people bringing their babies here often."

"Who cares? Lilly's a good baby. She deserves lunch at a fancy restaurant as much as you do," Derek chuckled. "Even though she can't eat any of it."

"That reminds me, she's not hungry, right?" Meredith asked, holding the restaurant door open for him because he was carrying Lilly in the car seat.

He shook his head. "No, I gave her a bottle about an hour ago. She's good."

"Okay," Meredith said.

"Hi, welcome to Camparo's. Do you have a reservation?" the hostess asked politely.

"Yes, 12:00 under Shepherd," Derek said.

The woman looked down at her book and spotted their name on the list. "Okay, great," she said, grabbing two menus. "If you would follow me, I'll take you to your table. Would you like a highchair?"

"Yes, thank you," Meredith said.

They followed the hostess to their table on the patio covered by an awning, and still well ventilated enough that the warm July heat wouldn't be uncomfortable. She set the menus on the table, and the high chair next to it. "Your server will be with you shortly. Enjoy your meal," she said. "By the way, your daughter is gorgeous."

"Oh, thank you. We think so, too," Derek grinned, fastening the car seat to the high chair. He unbuckled Lilly and picked her up. "Taking a baby to a restaurant is a lot of work, Lillybug."

"I know. Remember when it was just get up and go?" Meredith said, sitting down in her chair. "Now we have a checklist of a million things."

Derek sat down across from her, Lilly cradled in his arm. "Wouldn't trade that for anything," he said, kissing the baby's forehead.

"Okay, my turn," Meredith said, reaching her hands across the table.

"Oh, come on. I've only had her for ten seconds," he chuckled, but still passing Lilly over to Meredith.

"I thought I was the birthday girl," she countered, pressing kisses to Lilly's cheek. "You look very pretty."

Derek opened his menu and smiled at her. "I remember you picking out that dress when we went shopping back in April or May when you were pregnant. I knew it was one of your favorites."

"And her hair and the shoes... I'm impressed," Meredith said, flipping open her own menu with her free hand.

"Having four girly sisters and nine nieces taught me a lot over the years," Derek chuckled.

Meredith smiled. "I guess it's a good thing we had a girl," she said. "You know, I really thought we were having a boy."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I don't know why. I mean, it's pretty clear that girls dominate the Grey and Shepherd gene pools. We both only have sisters, and a lot more nieces than nephews. But I still thought there was a boy in there," Meredith said, rubbing Lilly's arm with her finger. "But when we saw her little girl parts on the sonogram, I was so happy. I never really had a mother-daughter whatever, and I knew that now, I could. Either way, I would've been thrilled, but I'm really happy we made a girl."

"Me, too," Derek said softly. "And I knew it all along."

Meredith sighed playfully. "Yes, you did."

Their meal was practically finished when Lilly got fidgety, and started wriggling in Meredith's arm. Meredith bounced her gently, trying to keep her from having a full-blown meltdown. Lilly didn't cry often, but when she did, she made it a point to show that she was upset. "Hey, you're okay. Are you bored?" Meredith asked her.

"Want me to take her?" Derek asked after he swallowed a piece of his steak.

Lilly let out a wail, and her face scrunched up in wrinkles. "Uh oh," Meredith said, dropping her fork onto her plate so she could hug Lilly to her chest, letting her look over her shoulder. "What's wrong, peanut?" she asked, lifting up her dress to peek into the back of her diaper. "She peed, but she doesn't usually cry over that. Maybe she's just tired?"

"Maybe," Derek said, noticing the glances they were getting from nearby restaurant patrons. "She got a shorter nap than usual because of lunch today."

"I would nurse her, but I'm wearing a dress, so I can't really do it discreetly in here. Can you get me a bottle from the bag?" Meredith asked.

Derek nodded, reaching down to grab the diaper bag next to his chair. He pulled one out and shook it, hoping it was warm enough for her so she'd drink it. "Here you go," he said.

"Thanks," Meredith said as she took it from him. She switched Lilly to a cradled position in her arm again and placed the bottle nipple against Lilly's lips. Lilly sucked tentatively for a few seconds before she spit it out, and continued to cry, nuzzling her face into Meredith's chest. "I think she prefers my boob."

"Can't say I blame her," Derek chuckled.

Meredith rolled her eyes at him, managing to laugh despite her frustration at not being able to quell Lilly's tears. "Shut up," she said. "Okay, just, uh... get the check."

"What? What about your chocolate mousse?" Derek asked.

"Lilly trumps chocolate mousse," Meredith said, getting up from her chair. She grabbed the diaper bag, and kissed Derek. "We already ate dinner. We can get dessert later."

Derek smirked. "Is that a euphemism?"

"I didn't mean for it to be, but yeah, I guess it kind of is," she said. "Meet you in the car?"

"Yeah," Derek agreed, pulling his wallet from his back pocket. "I'll be there in a few."

"Okay."

Meredith slung her own bag over her shoulder and rummaged for her keys as she walked out of the restaurant. When she spotted the car in the lot, she pressed the unlock button on the key fob, then opened the passenger side door. "One second, Lilly. Let me start the car so I can turn the air on," she said, turning the key in the ignition, and blasting the air conditioner in the hot car.

Once the car started to cool off, Meredith took two blankets from Lilly's bag, wrapping one around her daughter so she wouldn't be cold, and draping the other over her shoulder after pushing down the strap of her dress. "All set, Lilly," she said, guiding the baby to her breast.

Lilly immediately latched on, her hand going on top. She didn't suck fast, like she normally did when she was hungry; she was gentle, as though all she wanted was Meredith's warmth and comfort. Tears burned Meredith's eyes at the thought, mommy guilt hitting her like a lightning bolt.

"I know I haven't been around to nurse you as often as we'd both like. I'm sorry about that, Lilly," she said, smiling when Lilly looked up at her with the blue-green eyes that she'd gotten from both her parents.

"You know, you haven't even been here for two months, and I can't imagine you _not_ being here. Like Daddy said, this time last year, you didn't even exist. On my last birthday, I wished for a baby when I blew out the candles—which I know is superstitious and tacky, but I figured we could use all the help we could get. We'd only been trying for a few months, but that was enough to make me paranoid, like maybe it wasn't meant to happen. But then it did. I peed on a stick while Daddy held my dress, and we finally got a positive. I'll never forget that night, Lilly. You were the size of a pea, and Daddy and I were completely in love with you."

Meredith leaned down and kissed Lilly's forehead. "Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that. You'll hear that story a thousand more times as you grow up, but I just thought it would be good to tell you that today. I don't need to make a wish on birthday candles ever again, because you're here," she said, wiping under her eyes. "I never thought my life would turn out like this, Lilly, and I'm grateful for it every day."

Derek opened the driver's side door and slipped inside, holding a takeout bag in his hand. "Hey. How's she doing?" he asked.

"She's fine. I think she just wanted to nurse," Meredith said. "What's in the bag?"

"Chocolate mousse."

Meredith turned her head toward him. "We didn't order that."

"The waitress asked where you went. I said our daughter was getting fussy, so we had to leave before dessert. And when I told her it was your birthday, she comped us a free chocolate mousse," Derek said.

Meredith smiled. "That was sweet," she said. "I would eat it right now, except I feel like I'm going to explode."

"Later, then. During our break of marathon birthday sexing," Derek said, kissing her cheek before putting the bag in the backseat next to Lilly's car seat.

"Deal."

"Maybe Camparo's wasn't such a good idea," Derek said.

"Are you kidding? After eating practically nothing but hospital food all week, I couldn't wait," Meredith countered. "Interrupted sex, interrupted lunch... just part of being a parent."

"Don't jinx us for tonight," Derek teased.

"Eight days, remember? We will have sex," Meredith said.

Derek smirked. "Well, someone's eager."

"Damn right, I am," she agreed, looking down at Lilly as she pulled off her breast. "All done, Lillybug?"

"I'll burp her," Derek said. He reached for Lilly and kissed held her to his chest. "Hey, Princess. Can you burp for me?"

Meredith laughed. "The sooner you burp, the sooner we can leave the parking lot."

...

A pile of opened presents sat stacked next to Meredith on the couch. Nothing extravagant, but just little things Derek knew she wanted or needed. And when he handed her the final gift, Meredith shook her head, amused. "Derek, really, you're already getting sex tonight. You don't need to butter me up with presents," she giggled.

"There's no buttering," Derek said. "Although, that might be fun..."

"Gross."

"Just open it," Derek chuckled, combing his fingers through Lilly's hair, still wet from her bath.

Meredith peeled off the wrapping paper and smiled at what she saw. A dark purple scrub cap with white lilies printed on it. She turned to Derek. "Where did you get this?" she asked, holding it up so she could look at it more closely.

"A scrub store opened up in the same shopping center as the supermarket. I stopped in with Lilly last week just to see if they had anything good. When I saw that, I thought of you. I know you're not going to be an attending for eleven more months, but I figured this could be the start to your collection. You're gonna need them. Purple is your favorite color, and the lilies, well, I figured that was obvious."

"I love it," Meredith said.

"Yeah?"

"Yes." She dropped the scrub cap in her lap and put her hands on his cheeks. "Thank you," she said, kissing him.

"You got me my Clash one, which is my favorite, by the way," Derek said. "You needed one, too."

"It's your favorite?" Meredith asked.

Derek smiled. "You got it for me. Plus, Lilly has the tee shirt to match. Of course it's my favorite," he said.

"I can't wait to wear this," she said, leaning over to kiss Lilly's nose. "Thank you, Lillybug."

"Wanna open your card? It's homemade," Derek said, taking it from the table and giving it to her. "Lilly and I worked on it this morning."

Meredith took the card and ripped the flap of the envelope with her finger, then pulled it out. "Happy Birthday, Mommy," Meredith said, reading the front, written in Derek's best attempt at fancy script, despite his penchant for doctorish chicken scrawl. She opened the card and read the note. "We know you don't like poetry or sappy messages, so we took a picture for you instead," she said, smiling at the photo of Lilly and Derek..

She saw his name signed to the bottom, next to Lilly's stamped hand print in pink ink, still as tiny as it was when she was born. "Did you take this today?"

"Yeah, this morning after she woke up. That's why she in her monkey pajamas, and not her dress," Derek chuckled.

Meredith peeled the tape off the back of it and removed it from the card. "I'll put it in my cubby on Monday. I wanted more pictures in there to look at during the day."

"There's also a framed copy on your dresser," Derek said.

"We need to start hanging all our pictures on a wall. We're running out of room on every surface."

"That's how my desk looks at work. There's eight Lilly pictures sitting on it, along with the ones I have of the two of us," he replied, gently patting Lilly's diapered bottom with his hand, which always relaxed her.

Meredith laughed, crumpling up a wad of wrapping paper and tossing it to Charlie, who caught it in his mouth and started playing with it. "How do you fit that many pictures on your desk?" she asked.

"They're pictures of the three of us. Mostly you and her," Derek said. He kissed Meredith's temple and she leaned into him. "They're worth making room for."

"My cubby is basically a collage now. I think I used a whole thing of scotch tape hanging pictures up in it. Lilly's ultrasound pictures are still in there, too. Cristina makes fun of it. She calls it the 'Shepherd Family Portrait Studio.' But I don't care. Every time I see it, it makes me happy. I remember why I'm there, and that I'm doing it for Lilly," Meredith said, taking hold of Lilly's little bare foot.

"Hence the ten plus pictures I have on my desk," Derek said with a smile, looking down at Lilly. "What do you say, Lilly? Want to give Mommy her cake before you fall asleep?"

Meredith raised her eyebrows at him. "You're not going to sing to me, are you?"

"Fine. I won't sing to you. But next year, when Lilly's talking, all bets are off. We're both singing to you, whether you like it or not," Derek compromised.

"Fine," Meredith said as she took Lilly from Derek so he could get the cake from the kitchen.

Derek returned a few seconds later, holding two plates, two forks, and a vanilla frosted cake with _Happy Birthday, Meredith_ written on it in icing letters. He set it on the coffee table, then struck a match to light the scattering of candles on it. After they were lit, he smiled at her. "Okay, make a wish."

"I don't think I have one," Meredith said, looking down at her daughter. "I think I have everything I need."

"Well, you have to wish for something..."

"Fine, since I can't wish for three year maternity leave, I'll wish for uninterrupted sex tonight. That's pretty rare these says," Meredith giggled.

Derek grinned. "I second that, even though it's your birthday."

"Okay," Meredith said. She leaned toward the table and blew out the candles, careful to keep Lilly away from the small flames.

When they were all extinguished, Derek clapped his hands together in celebration. "Happy Birthday, Mer," he said. "Do you wanna cut it, or do you want me to?"

"No, go ahead," Meredith said. "What kind of cake is it?"

"Chocolate chip. Homemade this morning."

"Wow. You and Lilly accomplished a lot before noon, huh?" Meredith asked.

Derek cut her a slice and handed it to her on a plate. "She woke me up at seven with a dirty diaper, so we had a good head start," he said.

"Up at seven, and a short nap? Maybe we will get some uninterrupted time tonight," Meredith said, smiling at Lilly whose eyelids were becoming heavy. She took a bite of the cake and moaned. "Oh, wow. Screw sex; I'll just sit here and eat the whole cake."

"Good enough to choose over sex?"

"Yes, but I won't, because I've waited eight freaking days already," Meredith said. "Speaking of that, the chocolate mousse sitting in the fridge? I want to eat that off of you..."

"Like I said: your birthday, your rules."

"I want you to eat it off me, too," Meredith said, licking some frosting from her finger.

He cupped her cheeks in his hands and kissed her. "God, I love you."


	118. Eight Week Shots

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show, but baby Lilly is mine. I love her dearly. :)**

**Thanks for the reviews and your continued patience! As always, it means so much to me!  
**

Meredith pressed the up button on the elevator and checked her watch. 1:17. Seventeen minutes late for Lilly's doctor appointment. She impatiently pressed the button again. "Come on, come on," she sighed.

When the doors opened, she stepped inside and pushed the door close button, not waiting for anyone else that may have wanted to go upstairs, too. The lit number 4 switched to 5, and the doors opened again. Meredith practically ran down the hall, around the corner, and into the OB wing. She didn't see Derek with Lilly in the waiting room, so she walked over to the nurses' desk.

"Hi, my husband and daughter, Lilly, should be here. Could you tell me what room they're in, please?" Meredith asked as she caught her breath.

The nurse smiled at her. "Yes, they're in room C. You can go on back, Dr. Grey," she said.

"Thank you," Meredith replied, turning around and heading for the small corridor of exam rooms. She saw Derek and Lilly still waiting in room C, breathing a sigh of relief that Lilly hadn't gotten her shots yet. "Hey."

"Hey," Derek said, Lilly sitting on his lap in nothing but her diaper.

"Sorry I'm late. Surgery ran long," Meredith said, reaching for the baby.

"That's okay. We just got called back a few minutes ago," Derek said as he handed Lilly over. "You didn't miss anything."

Meredith kissed Lilly's forehead and cradled her in her arm. "Hmm, good. I have a feeling she's not going to be too happy about this, and I wanted to be here," she said.

"She's tough. She'll be fine," Derek reassured her. "How's your day been?"

"I've been in surgery since seven this morning, and the guy stroked out just as we were about to close. We tried to bring him back, but we couldn't," Meredith said, sitting down next to Derek on the exam table against the wall.

"I'm sorry," Derek said, rubbing his hand over her thigh.

Meredith kissed his cheek and leaned into him. "Thank you," she whispered. "You really think she'll be okay?"

"Well, it's not going to be a walk in the park; but I think it'll be harder on us than on her. Once it's over and done with, she'll forget all about it," Derek promised.

A nurse practitioner walked in the room with a small bin of vials and syringes, and Meredith felt her heart already speeding up. Even the thought of Lilly in pain was enough to make her cry, much less her baby actually _being_ in pain. She let out a breath and hugged Lilly closer.

"Good afternoon. I'm Erin; I'll be giving Lilly her vaccinations today," she said with a smile. "I'll just be taking her height and weight first to make sure she's where she should be developmentally. Would you mind laying her on the scale for me?"

"Sure," Meredith nodded. She hopped off the table and gently laid Lilly down on the scale, letting her hold onto her finger.

"Nine pounds, eight ounces," Erin said, recording the number in Lilly's chart.

"That's good, right?" Derek asked.

Erin nodded. "Absolutely. By two months, babies usually gain a little over three pounds. Lilly was on the more petite side at birth, so her weight's just fine," she said. She calculated Lilly's height with a tape measure, then recorded that, too. "Twenty and a quarter inches. Up two and a quarter inches since she was born, also completely normal."

"Okay."

"Head circumference is up to sixteen, two inches more than six weeks ago, which is great," Erin said.

Derek grinned. "Full of brains. Clearly, a genius."

"Yes, she is," Erin laughed. "I see in her chart that she had her second dose of Hep-B at four weeks?"

"Yes."

"Okay, so there's four shots today; the fifth one she takes orally," Erin said.

Meredith nearly lost her breath. "Four?"

"I know. I'm sorry," Erin said. "But I'm quick. I'll be done as fast as I can."

"Can we do the oral one first?" Meredith asked.

"The Rota one? Sure. It's in a dropper, so I'll just squeeze it into her mouth. It has a sweet flavor to it, so she shouldn't spit it back out," Erin said, taking the dropper from the bin and filling it with the medication. "Here we go, sweetie. How's that?" Erin asked as she squeezed the dropper into the side of Lilly's mouth.

Lilly puckered her lips in curiosity, but still swallowed it, and Meredith smiled. "Good job, peanut," she praised.

"Okay, for her vaccinations, I'll do two in each thigh. DTap and Hib in the left; IPV and PCV in the right. The thighs hurt less because there's more of a fat cushion than the arm," Erin said, filling up each syringe with the correct dosage from the vials. "It shouldn't take more than thirty seconds to do all four."

Meredith's stomach flip flopped and she swallowed thickly. "Can I hold her when you do it?"

"Sure. Just let her sit on your arm. Dr. Shepherd, if you could hold her feet, that would be great," Erin requested, lining up the syringes on the tray.

"Alright," Derek said. He took a gentle hold of Lilly's feet and kissed her forehead. "It'll only hurt for a few seconds, Princess."

Meredith held Lilly's hand, and she wrapped it around Meredith's finger like she always did. "Okay, we're ready," she said, releasing a deep breath.

"Okay," Erin nodded, taking the first shot and injecting it into Lilly's thigh.

As expected, Lilly didn't take to it well, screaming in protest when she felt the prick of the needle. The sound made Meredith's eyes water, and she bit her lip. "I'm sorry. I know it hurts, Lilly."

Erin injected the second, third, and fourth shots in record time, and by the time she was finished only seconds later, Lilly's wails escalated to a level they'd never heard before, her face bright red, her forehead covered in wrinkles.

"Good girl. All done," Erin said, tossing the syringes into the sharps container. She saw Meredith wiping tears off her own cheeks and smiled in sympathy. "She'll be fine in a few minutes, I promise. This is always harder on the parents than it is on the babies," she said, putting bandaids over each injection site to avoid infections.

"I know," Meredith nodded.

"Don't be worried if she runs a slight fever. It's a completely normal side effect. Infant Tylenol will knock it out. Until then, nursing or a bottle should calm her down," Erin advised. "You guys did well, all three of you."

"Thank you," Derek said.

"Okay, she's all done. Take the room for as long as you need," Erin said politely, gathering up the syringe bin and Lilly's chart. "You did great, honey," she told Lilly with a smile. "Nice seeing you both."

Derek returned the smile. "You, too."

Erin left the room, closing the door behind her, and when they were given some privacy, Derek wrapped his arms around Meredith and Lilly. "All done. That wasn't so bad, right?"

Meredith sniffled, brushing the trails of tears off of Lilly's face with her hand. "She probably hates us."

"No, she doesn't. She's just gonna be fussy for a while," Derek said, handing her a tissue.

She took it from him and dabbed at her eyes. "Fussy? Derek, she's screaming," Meredith said, hugging Lilly to her chest. "I know, peanut. I promise, we didn't do it to hurt you. We just love you."

"How about we put her dress back on, then we can go to my office and you can nurse her?" Derek suggested.

"Yeah, okay," Meredith nodded. She tried to lay Lilly down on the table, but frowned when she realized Lilly was gripping onto her hair, holding it in her tiny fingers as she continued to cry. "She's too upset. Let's just wrap a blanket around her for now. Once she calms down, we can dress her."

Derek pulled a blanket from the diaper bag and draped it over Lilly's back, gently tucking it over her shoulders and around her belly to keep her warm and covered on the walk to his office. He kissed the back of Lilly's head. "If Mommy or Daddy could've done that for you, we would have, Lillybug," he said.

"Do you think she's in pain still?" Meredith asked.

"Nah, she's just startled. One minute, she's happy as a clam, then boom, four needles. I'd cry too if I were her. Like Erin said, the parents cry more than the kids. Once she nurses, she'll relax and forget about it," Derek said, slinging the diaper bag over his shoulder.

"Okay."

They left the exam room, and weaved their way out of the hospital wing toward Derek's office. Others walking around turned their heads when they heard Lilly crying, so Meredith began rubbing her back to soothe her, bouncing on her heels. "We're gonna go have some quiet time, okay, Lilly?"

Once they reached Derek's office, he pulled his keys from his pocket, and unlocked the door. Meredith walked in first with Lilly, making a beeline for the couch under the window. "Make sure you lock it. I have scrubs on, so I'll just take my shirt off."

"Okay," he nodded, turning the lock in place. He walked over to the couch and took Lilly while Meredith got situated. "You're okay. No more needles, I promise," he told her, his heart sinking at the look of upset on Lilly's face.

Meredith took another blanket from Lilly's bag. "I don't have a nursing bra on," she said.

"That's okay. Just take it off. I won't look," Derek said, turning around.

"We made a baby together. Why would I care if you looked?" Meredith snapped. She sighed, draping the blanket over her bare shoulder as she propped a pillow on her lap. "Sorry. I don't mean to be cranky," she said, brushing some hair off her face.

Derek sat down next to her on the couch and handed Lilly to her. "Don't apologize. I get it," he said.

Lilly's crying ceased as soon as she latched on and started to nurse, and they both sighed in collective relief. "Good," Meredith whispered. She looked to Derek and smiled as best she could. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Letting me yell at you. I'm so tired. I don't mean it," Meredith said. "I didn't think that would be so hard."

"Me either," Derek admitted.

Meredith leaned into him when he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I love you," she said.

"I love you, too."

"She already looks more relaxed," Meredith said, brushing her finger over Lilly's tear-stained cheek.

"See? Already forgotten about," Derek said.

"Good, because I don't want her to remember that. You know where the baby Tylenol is, right? Top shelf of the medicine cabinet?" Meredith said. "Just in case she spikes a fever."

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "When do you think you'll be home tonight?"

"I have a surgery at 2:30 with Bailey. I'm hoping to be out by six, home by six thirty, but we'll see," Meredith sighed, checking her watch. "I wish I could just go home and be with her in case she needs me."

Derek gave her shoulders a reassuring squeeze. "She'll probably just sleep. If she feels warm, I'll give her the Tylenol, that's all. And by that time, you'll probably be home, anyway. It'll be fine," he said.

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?" he asked.

"Balance out my irrational mommy fears with rational calmness," Meredith said.

Derek grinned. "It's a gift."

"Yeah, yeah," she sighed playfully.

"Besides the surgery, how's your morning been?" he asked.

"Okay, until our daughter got stuck with four needles," she said. "But I managed to get this weekend off because I switched shifts with Izzie, so that's good."

"Really? How'd you do that?" Derek asked.

"Alex is the chief resident, so he has power over my schedule. And because I let him live in the old house free of charge, he can't really say no to me," she said. "He and Iz want to go on a real honeymoon at some point, so they're both trying to bank hours. I was supposed to work from twelve to twelve on Saturday, but Izzie's going to take that, so she'll get twenty-four."

"Good," Derek said. "I have a surgery scheduled for Saturday, and now that you're off, you'll be home to watch Lilly."

She sighed. "I hate this."

"What?"

"I just feel like I never see you anymore. When you're here, I'm home, and when I'm here, you're home. I don't want Lilly to think that's the way it's supposed to be," Meredith said, watching as Lilly's eyelids fluttered with sleepiness.

"It's not always going to be like this. Just a few more months. It's already the beginning of August. Remember when you were pregnant, and you weren't sure you'd be able to work as much as you wanted to? You worked until you were practically ready to push," Derek chuckled. "You made it through that without a problem, and we can do this, too."

"I know. It's just different now that she's here. Most days, I know we can do it. But today it's just... I don't know. I try really hard to be all strong and tough about all this, but it's not easy sometimes," Meredith admitted, dropping her head onto Derek's shoulder.

He kissed the top of her head. "I know."

Meredith's pager went off, and she quickly pulled it from her hip. "Damn. Bailey. I have to go prep our patient," she said, glancing at Lilly. "I don't care if she yells at me. I'm not leaving until Lilly's done."

"You sure? I packed a bottle," Derek said.

"She's just starting to fall asleep, and she's barely sucking anymore. I'll wait a few minutes until she lets go on her own," Meredith said.

"How'd you get on a general surgery? I thought you were scrubbing in with Nelson today," Derek said.

"Hectic morning in the pit. My neuro surgery was an elective, so it was bumped so Bailey could have the OR," Meredith shrugged. "Shadow Shepherd is used to getting bumped off the OR board. No big deal."

"Dr. Nelson," Derek corrected.

"Calling him Shadow Shepherd is a compliment to you. You should be flattered."

"You're a neurosurgeon in the making. What if someone called you that?" Derek laughed.

"I been living in the shadow of Ellis Grey since the first day of med school. I'm so used to the freaking shadow that I shy away from sunlight," Meredith joked.

Derek smiled. "Just think of what Lilly will have to put up with. Ellis Grey, surgical royalty, as her grandmother; two neurosurgeon parents; all four of my sisters are doctors, then there's Lexie. Eight surgeons in her family. That's quite a legacy to live up to. Thankfully, she's brilliant, so it won't be a problem."

"Well, that's true," Meredith agreed, feeling Lilly unlatch as she finally slipped into sleep. "All done, peanut?"

"See? All happy and relaxed again," Derek said. He watched as Meredith kissed Lilly's forehead, then carefully handed her to him so she could get ready to go back to work.

"I hate that I have to rush off," Meredith said as she hooked her bra then reached for her shirt. "Are you guys going to hang out here?"

"I'll just wait a few minutes to make sure she's really asleep. Once the telltale thumb is in her mouth, we'll go," Derek nodded, gently rubbing Lilly's back.

Meredith pulled her shirt back over her head and brushed her hair into a ponytail. "Okay," she said. She leaned down and kissed Lilly again. "Mommy loves you so much. You did so good today."

"See you at home," Derek said, before Meredith raised her head to kiss him.

"Hmm, yeah," she murmured against his lips. "I'll call as soon as I'm out of surgery. And have me paged if you need me. I don't care if I have to scrub out."

"Okay," he said.

Meredith looked back as she walked toward the door. She put her hand on the knob and regretfully turned it. "Alright, I'll see you later on tonight."

Derek offered her an optimistic smile, hoping to cheer up. "Just think about this weekend. Sex, sleeping in, and lots of Lilly time."

She smiled back at him. "Thank you."

...

By the time Meredith made it downstairs to pre-op, her patient, a little boy, was already partially sedated, and Bailey was counting the dosages of each IV to document them before surgery. Meredith walked into the room and bit her lip, ready for whatever speech Bailey was sure to give her about tardiness.

"On your first day as an intern, what was rule number two, Grey?" Bailey asked.

"Answer every page," Meredith replied.

Bailey looked up, finally making eye contact with her. "And?"

"I know. I'm sorry. Lilly had her eight week shots this afternoon, and she was upset, so Derek and I were trying to calm her down," Meredith immediately apologized.

Bailey smiled slightly in understanding. "I remember that day. Isn't easy..."

"No, it isn't," Meredith agreed.

"She okay?" Bailey asked.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I was nursing her when you paged, and I wanted to make sure she was asleep before I left. I'm really sorry," she reiterated, making herself useful by taking the boy's pre-op temperature.

"Hmm, I'll let you off the hook this time," Bailey said.

"Thank you."

Bailey handed her the patient's chart before leaving the room. "Finish prepping him, then meet me in the OR. And don't be late."

Meredith shook her head adamantly. "I won't, I promise."

"Okay, then."

Two hours passed in the OR without a call from Derek or a surgical complication, and Meredith was relieved. Her mind had been on rote, her fingers doing the work for her as she thought about Lilly at home, hoping she was still asleep, or at the very least, feeling better than she was earlier. She had at least another hour and half in the OR, and confident that it would be smooth sailing to the finish line, she brought her focus back to the surgery.

"Here. Take these, and sew the blood vessels back onto the liver," Bailey said, handing her the 5.0 prolene sutures.

Meredith raised her eyes, suspicious of the invitation. "Really?"

"I trust you. Just don't kill him, or this will be the second time I'd have to yell at you today, and I don't like yelling at you," Bailey said.

"You used to," Meredith said as she began to delicately suture the first of the four blood vessels back onto the liver.

"Yeah, well, that was back when all I had to do was look at you all to put the fear of God into you. Now, you're all snazzy fifth year residents, too arrogant for your own good," Bailey said with a hint of levity.

"Oh, we're still scared. Don't worry," Meredith assured her.

Bailey smiled satisfactorily under her mask. "Good."

Meredith's pager went off on the tray table against the wall, and one of the scrub nurses, Mary, quickly went to retrieve it. She called out to the nurses' station, and jotted down a message, all the while, Meredith's mind trying to stay on task. Five sutures down, a hundred more to go.

"Dr. Grey, Dr. Shepherd called for you a few minutes ago," Mary said as she approached the table.

Meredith looked up. "Is everything okay?"

"Would you like me to read the message out loud?" Mary asked.

"Um, yeah, that would be fine," Meredith nodded, relinquishing any semblance of privacy with the urge to know why Derek had called.

"He said that Lilly is running a low grade fever. He gave her the Tylenol, but she's being fussy with a bottle," Mary informed her, reading off the notepad.

"Is she really upset?" Meredith asked.

Mary shook her head apologetically. "That's all his message said."

Meredith swallowed thickly, her mind immediately pulled from the fragile work of her hands inside the patient's body. All she could think about was Lilly, who was at home, and who needed her. And here she was, stuck in surgery. History repeating itself thirty years later. The same thing happened countless times when Meredith was little, and here it was, happening all over again. In that moment, she was pretty sure she could rival Ellis Grey in the crappy mom department.

Her eyes burned with tears, and she stared at the clock on the wall straight ahead as she tried to blink them away. She let out a breath. "Okay, can you tell him I'll be home as soon as I can?"

"Sure," Mary replied, walking back over to the phone.

Bailey saw the tears pooled in Meredith's eyes, and her determination to finish the sutures, despite how obviously distressed she was. She turned to the general fellow next to her, and nodded toward the surgical field. "Take over until I get back," she said. "Grey, scrub room."

Meredith carefully handed the line of suture over to the fellow, and followed Bailey out of the OR. She started apologizing before the automatic doors swooshed shut behind them, trying to soften the brunt of what was sure to be another verbal berating. "I'm sorry. Really, I'm fine. I can finish the surgery," Meredith said.

"Zzzt," Bailey interrupted, raising her hand in a halting motion. "Shut up, scrub out, and go home."

"What?"

"You're no good to me in the OR when you're crying. Go home," Bailey repeated. Meredith stood there, frozen in hesitation, and Bailey's eyes softened. "Look, I know what it's like. When you have a baby, that baby trumps every other thing in this world, even surgery. That's the way it should be. Now, go."

"You're not mad?" Meredith asked.

Bailey shook her head. "I'm mad that we're still talking about this. Now go on; get out of here," she said.

Meredith exhaled, quickly pulling off her gloves. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

Bailey stopped on her heel and turned around before going back into the OR. "A lukewarm sponge bath, and a light onesie," she said.

"Excuse me?" Meredith asked.

"For the fever."

"Oh. Thank you," Meredith said, taking off her surgical mask. "I don't know if I've ever said this to you, but you're kind of awesome."

Bailey pushed the automatic door button with her elbow and glanced back at her briefly. "Yeah, well, don't tell anyone."

Meredith just smiled as she untied her surgical gown, then grabbed a new bar of soap to scrub out. She had always appreciated her former resident, but today, she was fairly certain that if given the chance, she'd hug her.

...

As soon as Meredith turned the handle to the front door of the house, she heard Lilly's wails coming from upstairs, and it was enough to break her heart. She kicked off her shoes, tossed her keys onto the table in the foyer, and jogged up the steps, following the sound until she reached Lilly's nursery, where Derek was sitting in the rocking chair, attempting to calm her down but with no luck.

When Derek saw her walk through the doorway, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "What're you doing here?" he asked.

"The nurse told me you called, so Bailey let me go," Meredith said. "What's her temp?"

"99.8. She woke up when I took her out of the car seat after we got home, and she started fussing. When I took her temperature and saw she had a fever, I gave her the Tylenol, but it's the infant kind, so it kicks in gradually. I guess it hasn't taken full affect yet," Derek said.

"Okay, I'm going to go change my shirt, then I'll feed her. Can we go into our room?" Meredith asked.

Derek nodded and got up out of the chair, following her into their bedroom. "She never has any problems with the bottle. I think she just wanted boob, and unfortunately, I don't have the right equipment."

"It's okay," Meredith said as she pulled off her shirt and tossed it into the hamper. She rummaged through Derek's closet for a button down, and pulled one from the hanger. "I'll probably just nurse her all weekend, so I may as well wear this."

"Hey, if that's easier, take whatever you want," Derek shrugged, gently patting Lilly's back.

Meredith took her bra off and slung the shirt on. "Remember the days when I valued modesty?"

"Our first date ended with you, naked and wrapped in a blanket, kicking me out of your house. So, no, not really," Derek chuckled.

"I believe being wrapped in a blanket is the modesty part," Meredith said. She crawled back onto the bed and propped a pillow on her lap. "Okay, I'm all ready, Lilly."

Derek sat down next to her, handing a still crying Lilly over. "I'm really sorry, Mer. I know you were in surgery, and honestly, it took about three tries before I actually let the call to the hospital go through. I just didn't know what else to do. She's never had a fever before," Derek said.

"It's okay," Meredith said softly, guiding Lilly to her breast. Lilly latched on and put her hand on top like she always did. Meredith smiled down at her daughter. "I'm glad you called."

"Was Bailey mad?" Derek asked.

"No, actually she was kind of... sweet. I mean, sternly sweet," Meredith said. "She's a mom, too. Sacrifices are part of the game. She gets that. And if I have to sacrifice one, I'd rather it be surgery. Lilly didn't sign up for any of this. I never want her to feel like she's the one being sacrificed for my career. That's how I felt when I was little, and that... really sucked."

"Do you feel like you're sacrificing too much?" Derek asked candidly.

Meredith looked over at him. "What do you mean?"

"It's just... I know you wanted chief resident. You didn't really get the chance to throw your hat in the ring because you were pregnant," Derek explained, putting a pillow behind Meredith's back so she would be more comfortable.

"I used to want it. But given the choice between chief resident and mom, I choose mom," Meredith said, smiling when Lilly stretched her toes. "Work used to be my life. I'd spend three days straight in the hospital without leaving the building. But Lilly is so much more fun than paperwork. Alex deserved it. He works hard, and he's fair. Plus, he's technically Uncle Alex, so if he can help me out once in a while for Lilly's sake, he'll do it."

"I just didn't want you to regret it ten years from now. You work hard, too. You deserve it," Derek said.

"I would've regretted it more if we waited ten years to have kids because we were too busy to have them, and realized we waited too long," Meredith countered. "I know you've been ready for kids for fifteen years."

"You know, I held that against Addison for a long time. We always talked about ifs and whens, but it never went anywhere. And looking back, I couldn't be more grateful that we didn't have any. I mean, I would've loved any kids we had, but I'd feel so..." Derek said, searching for the word he was looking for.

"Stuck?" Meredith supplied.

"Exactly. I mean, who knows where I'd be if Addison slept with Mark, but we had a kid. I couldn't have just packed up and come out here. As much as I would have wanted to just leave, I could never do it. I'd be tethered to a woman who cheated on me for the rest of my life," Derek said. "You know, Addison and Mark sleeping together was the best thing that could've happened. Back when I first moved out here, I was done with relationships. Never thought I'd get married again. Gave up my dream of being a dad. I was done with all of it. I came out here for work, and work was really all I had."

Meredith smiled. "And then you met me?"

"Then I met you," Derek said.

"See? All of the good cancels out all of the crap. We made a person. And I just watch her... the way she scrunches her nose like me or sleeps with her hand on her chest like you. We _made_ her. I think about that sometimes, and it still shocks me. I don't care about some job title or a big, flashy surgery. She's what matters to me. You and her," Meredith said, patting the bed for Charlie to hop up. "You too, buddy." She reached for Derek's hand. "My point is, I don't regret anything. Every time I look at Lilly, I can't imagine our lives without her in it."

"Me either."

"So, we're gonna let Lilly eat, then we're gonna give her a lukewarm bath, put her in a onesie, and wait for the medicine to kick in. Then, we're gonna try to have some semblance of a good weekend. One foot in front of the other," Meredith decided, raising her head to kiss him.

Derek smiled curiously against her lips. "That's very... Bailey of you."

"Yeah, well, I spent most of the day with her. It rubs off on you."


	119. Family is a Good Thing

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, things would be very, very different.  
**

**Sorry for the wait. Life has been getting in the way of all my writing time. Thanks as always for your patience. :)  
**

Meredith clicked the pen on the coffee table, and signed her, Derek's, and Lilly's name to her father's birthday card. Then, she stuffed it in the envelope, and sealed it. It was the first birthday card she could remember giving her dad since she was five years old, and she was actually happy for it, especially for Lilly's sake. She deserved to have a grandpa, and they wanted that for her.

Derek sat next to her on the couch, Lilly between them, blowing raspberries on her stomach after changing her diaper. "Does that tickle?" he asked her, watching as she wriggled around in delight each time.

When Lilly smiled up at him, a mirrored grin spread on Derek's face. "Mer, she's smiling!"

"What?" Meredith looked down, and saw the happy, gummy smile on Lilly's face as Derek continued to tickle her, and she laughed. "Oh my God, look how cute she is! I need to get pictures," she said, twisting around to pull the camera out from the cabinet under the end table. "Do it again."

Derek leaned down and blew on her belly, and Lilly put on another smile, wider than before, and Meredith quickly snapped a picture. "That's not just a little smile or a gas smile, either, like she usually makes. That's a full-fledged, happy smile," Meredith said, kissing Lilly's forehead.

"She looks like you when she smiles," Derek said.

"You think so?"

"All you," he nodded, continuing to tickle her. "You're adorable, Princess."

"August 7th, first real smile," Meredith said. "My dad's birthday, so it's easy to remember."

"It'll be documented in her baby book, right next to the dates she takes her first steps and says her first word... which will be Dada," Derek said, fixing Lilly's dress and scooping her off the couch.

Meredith laughed. "You sound pretty confident."

"I am," Derek smirked.

"We'll see..." Meredith said, slinging Lilly's diaper bag over her shoulder.

"Is that a bet?"

Meredith reached out her arm. "Fine."

"What do I get if I win?" Derek asked.

"When _I _win? Um, eternal bragging rights?" Meredith suggested.

"Deal," Derek agreed, shaking her hand. He looked at Lilly. "Ready to go, smiley?"

"I wish we could just make her smile until bedtime," Meredith said, picking up the keys off the table in the foyer. "Here. Swap."

"Why do I always have to drive?" Derek asked playfully, handing Lilly to her and taking the keys.

Meredith shrugged as she fixed Lilly's hair bow. "You love driving. And I'm flexible. I can maneuver myself from the front seat to the backseat if Lilly needs me in three seconds."

"Oh, I'm well aware of your flexibility," Derek grinned. He waited for Meredith to step out the front door before he locked it behind them. "You have the photo album, right?"

"Yeah, it's already in the car," Meredith said. "You think he'll like that, right? I really didn't know what else to get for him. And I know he wants more pictures of Lilly."

"Yeah, he's gonna love it," Derek said, unlocking the car.

Meredith gently put Lilly in her car seat and buckled her in. She kissed her forehead, then closed the door. "And Molly, Lexie and I went in on new putters for him, which I realize is very sisterly."

"That's good. That's what sisters do," Derek said as they slipped into the front seat. "When I was at work this morning, Lexie told me Laura was excited to see her new cousin," Derek said as he backed out of the driveway.

"I miss her. We haven't seen her since New Year's when I was four months pregnant. Lilly was still just a tiny, little fetus back then," Meredith said. She glanced back in the mirror they had attached to the backrest of the backseat, and smiled when she saw Lilly sucking her thumb, looking up with interest at the fish mobile clipped to her car seat. "I wish Susan was still alive. She would've loved Lilly."

Derek reached across the console and took her hand. "I wish she was, too."

"But that's okay. Lilly has your mom. And I'm pretty sure my mom wouldn't have been the best grandma, anyway. The only thing she sewed was skin, and she never cooked or baked once in her life. Your mom makes up for her lack of her Grey grandmas," Meredith said.

"The lucid, emotionally stable version of your mother would've loved Lilly just as much as my mom does," Derek said, squeezing her hand. "She was just..."

"Neither of those things?" Meredith supplied. "It's okay. The important thing is that Lilly's happy, and she is."

"It's nice to see you wanting to spend time with your family. Five years ago, did you ever think you'd even speak to your dad again?" Derek asked.

Meredith laughed in spite of herself. "Is that a serious question?"

"See? Look how far you've come. Going to your dad's birthday lunch, joint birthday present with your sisters," Derek said encouragingly.

"I know. It's so _Full House_," Meredith said with disgust.

Derek laughed. "I hated that show," he said, pulling onto the main road.

"Me, too."

...

They arrived at Thatcher's home twenty minutes later, and walked up the steps to the front door. When Laura spotted them, she all but cheered at their arrival. She clapped her hands together in excitement as Lexie opened the door for them, standing on her tiptoes to get a peek at Lilly.

"Hi," Laura greeted them.

Meredith and Derek smiled at the four year old with dirty blonde hair and blue eyes, the spitting image of a Grey. "Hi, sweetie," Meredith said. "You got so big."

"I'm four now," Laura said proudly, holding up four fingers.

"Four? I thought you were sixteen," Derek said, pretending to be shocked.

Laura shrieked with laughter. "No, I'm four!"

"Well then, that means you're officially old enough to hold your new cousin. How's that sound?" Derek asked.

"Hi, guys," Molly said as she and Thatcher entered the living room.

"Hi," Meredith said, giving them each a small hug, Lilly in between. "Happy birthday," she told Thatcher.

Thatcher smiled. "Thank you. And thanks for coming. I know it's hard, with work and everything..."

"Oh, it's no problem. Happy to come," Derek said, shaking his hand.

"She's so beautiful," Molly said, rubbing Lilly's hand with her finger. "She looks a lot like Laura did when she was first born."

"I think so, too," Meredith said as Lilly looked around at all of the new faces with curiosity.

"Can I hold her now?" Laura asked, looking up at them with hopeful eyes.

"Sure you can," Derek replied. "Wanna hop up onto the couch?"

"Uh huh," Laura said, eagerly scrambling toward the couch and sitting in the corner. She held her arms out in expectation, waiting to hold the baby. "I'm ready."

Meredith laughed, gently placing Lilly on Laura's lap, making sure her head was supported by a pillow. Lilly glanced between Meredith and the mysterious, pigtailed person holding her, but decided to simply start sucking on her thumb rather than cry.

Laura smiled down at her in awe. "She's really little."

"She's little just like your dolls, Laur," Lexie said. "And best of all, she even has dirty diapers."

"Yeah, those are fun. Especially at three in the morning, in the dark," Derek said.

"Yep, I remember those, too. Eric always pretended to be asleep so that I'd have to get up and do it," Molly said.

"Is he here?" Meredith asked, setting down Lilly's diaper bag and her purse next to the couch.

Molly shook her head. "No, he had to train recruits at McChord near Tacoma. It was last minute. He was really looking forward to seeing you guys and meeting Lilly," she said regretfully.

"That's okay. There's always next time," Derek shrugged, chuckling at how fascinated Laura was by the baby.

When Laura made a fish face at her, Lilly smiled in response. Derek noticed the gesture and tapped on Meredith's arm. "Another smile."

Lexie gasped when she saw. "Since when does she smile like that?"

"Since a half hour ago," Meredith giggled. "Derek was blowing raspberries on her stomach. She broke out in this big smile. I swear, I just about peed myself," she said.

"God, she looks just like you did, Meredith," Thatcher said softly, watching both of his granddaughters. "Same gummy smile you had. It's like you're that age again. Everything but her hair, and she's you. It's uncanny."

"Now all we need is one from Lexie to see if the Grey gene is dominant, three for three," Molly said.

Lexie smiled and looked toward the kitchen. "So, who's hungry?"

...

After lunch and opening gifts, they all retreated back into the living room with cake, and Laura corralled her mother and aunts onto the floor to play some sort of princess game. It wasn't exactly the kind of game Meredith preferred, but for Laura's sake, she was willing to sport fake, plastic jewelry. Derek smiled at her from his seat on the couch, trying to hold back a laugh when Laura handed her the tiara.

"So, Meredith tells me you like golf," Derek said to Thatcher, who was sitting across from him.

"Yeah. I wasn't expecting a new set from the girls. That was really sweet of them," Thatcher said, smiling at Lilly who was sleeping in the crook of his arm. "Do you golf?" he asked Derek.

"Yeah. When I moved out here, I started playing. Not competitively or anything; it's just relaxing," Derek said. "Greenlake has a nice course."

"I've been a member there for years," Thatcher said.

"No kidding," Derek said in surprise. "We should go golfing sometime."

"I'd love to. We'll have to plan something," Thatcher agreed, gently switching Lilly to his other arm. "Must be hard to get out and play with a newborn, huh?"

Derek laughed. "Yeah, I haven't been able to go recently. I would take Lilly in the Babybjorn, but I don't think Mer would approve of that," he joked.

"How's it been, staying home with the baby?" Thatcher asked.

"I love it. It's nice to be able to take a break from work. I mean, sometimes I miss the hustle and bustle of surgery, but Lilly is... God, she's amazing. I love staying home with her," Derek said. "It's rough on Meredith, though, being away from her. She's so afraid of turning into her mother."

"Meredith may have Ellis' talent and her looks, but that's the only way she's like her mother. Ellis would stay at the hospital for days without coming home. Whenever I tried to call, she was always busy. And she never once called to check in, or even talk to Meredith. I never knew when she was going to walk through the door. I may not have been there for most of her life, but I know Meredith well enough to know that she would never do anything like that," Thatcher said, shaking his head.

"That's what I tell her. Deep down, I think she knows that. But it still scares her. I bring Lilly up to the hospital every day. Mer never goes more than a few hours without seeing her. When I'm working, she'll bring Lilly up to see me," Derek said before chuckling slightly. "We've really learned to appreciate days off."

"Well, if you ever needed me to watch Lilly, I'd be more than happy to. I watch Laura a few times a week, when Molly goes to run errands or something. She'll tell you, I'm a fun grandpa. So, please don't hesitate to call," Thatcher offered.

"Thank you," Derek said sincerely. "That... that really means a lot."

"It's the least I can do for you both. And for Lilly," Thatcher said, smiling at how Lilly scrunched her nose. "You know, flipping through the photo album you gave me reminded me so much of Meredith when she was born. Even her little facial expressions are the same. I wish every day that I could go back to when Meredith was this age. I'd do everything so differently."

Derek pursed his lips, surprised by his candidness, but simply nodded. "Yeah. I wish that, too," he said. "But look at you guys now. You're making up for lost time. You get a fresh start with Lilly. Meredith and I want you to be involved."

"Second chance?" Thatcher said.

Derek nodded. "Second chance."

Lilly stirred and opened her eyes, her bright blue irises looking first at Thatcher then to Derek. Derek smiled at his daughter. "Hey, Princess. Did you have a good nap?"

"Light sleeper, huh?" Thatcher asked with a chuckle, handing Lilly over to Derek.

"Oh, yeah. One of my genetic gifts," Derek teased. He sat Lilly on his lap so she could watch what was going on across the room. She may have been too young to appreciate her mother wearing green, clip-on earrings and a shiny, silver crown, but at the very least, it would keep her entertained.

"Gotta admit, I'm really glad we had a girl, so we can buy that game and Lilly can make Mer play it over and over again," Derek said.

Meredith turned around, still donning her jewelry, and smirked at him. "I heard that."

"You look very pretty," Derek grinned.

"Lilly and I will make sure you get to play, too, you know," Meredith warned playfully, flicking the spinner after Laura handed it to her.

"I've been playing Pretty Pretty Princess with my nieces since I was in college. I'm a pro," Derek said with feigned arrogance.

"Wanna play next round, Uncle Derek?" Laura asked excitedly, her long, pink necklace touching her knees as she sat crossed-legged.

"You walked right into that one..." Thatcher pointed out, smiling in sympathy.

Derek kissed Lilly's forehead, then passed her back to Thatcher. "Yeah, I guess I did," he said before joining them around the game board on the floor.

...

"So, what were you and my dad talking about?" Meredith asked on the drive home later on that evening. She looked back in the mirror again to sneak a peek at Lilly, who was still awake, staring with fascination as she clenched and unclenched her tiny fist.

"Not much. Golf, mostly. We talked about going out on the course together," he said, stopping at a red light.

Meredith turned her head toward him. "You're going golfing with my dad?"

"Yeah. Unless you think it's a bad idea," he said.

"No, I don't. It's just... weird," Meredith shrugged.

"Good weird?" Derek asked.

Meredith considered a moment before speaking. "Yeah, I guess."

"You know, I really think he wants to be a part of Lilly's life. He even volunteered to babysit. I actually think he'd be thrilled if we asked him to," Derek said. "He wants a second chance, Mer."

"I know he does," she said softly. "And I want him to have it. Not for me; for Lilly. My childhood was a crap shoot, but Lilly needs a grandpa." Meredith's face softened and she smiled slightly. "He really loves her."

"Yeah, he does," Derek nodded.

"And I'm pretty sure Laura thinks Lilly is the coolest thing she's ever seen," Meredith laughed. "Although, you and I think that, too."

Derek smiled proudly. "That's because she is."

"I know Laura's older, but she's still Lilly's cousin. And because all of Lilly's other cousins live on the other side of the country, I think having Laura around would be kind of nice," Meredith said.

"I think so, too," Derek said. "They're family. Family is a good thing."

Meredith heard her phone ringing, and pulled it from the bag at her feet. "Cristina," she said, reading the display. She answered it, and held the phone to her ear. "Hey."

Derek heard Cristina's muffled voice on the other end, but couldn't decipher what she was saying. The way Meredith's eyebrows knitted together in concern told him whatever she had to say wasn't good news.

"Mhm," Meredith murmured as she chewed on her lower lip. "So, you left?" she asked. "No, not yet. We're on our way home."

Derek glanced over at her, eyes pleading not to invite Cristina over. Meredith looked at him and shrugged helplessly. "What do you want me to do?" she whispered, holding her hand over the receiver.

"Not have her show up with a check for room and board," Derek said, knowing how clingy Cristina could be when her own personal life was in shambles. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, waiting to get the story from Meredith whenever she hung up the phone.

"No, it's okay," Meredith said in response to whatever Cristina said. "We'll be home soon."

She ended the call and dropped her phone onto her lap. Against his better judgment, Derek asked anyway. "What happened?"

"She didn't give me the long, sordid version over the phone. Apparently, Owen brought up the M word, and they got in a fight," Meredith said, checking on Lilly in the mirror again.

"M word?"

"Marriage," Meredith sighed.

"Oh," Derek said. "Yeah, Cristina and that topic are like oil and water."

"I know. So, I told her she could come over. And no, she's not writing a check or bringing a suitcase," Meredith promised. "I love her, but God, I'd go crazy if she moved in..."

Derek turned toward her and smirked. "Oh, _you'd _go crazy?"

...

Just as soon as Cristina arrived, Derek wanted her gone. And not because he hated her; even if they would never admit it to one another, they were, for all intents and purposes, friends, albeit grudgingly. It was because it was Saturday night, which had been dubbed sex night for going on three years. But with Cristina hogging Meredith all to herself, the chances of him getting laid decreased exponentially.

He glanced at his watch as he burped Lilly over his shoulder after Meredith nursed. Cristina had been ranting for nineteen minutes, Meredith interrupting from time to time to give her input. Derek sighed, kissing Lilly's cheek. "Alright, Lilly, this is what we call the excuse and escape method," he said into her ear.

Derek got up off the couch and cleared his throat. "I'm gonna go watch the end of the Yankee game upstairs with Lilly, then I'll give her a bath."

"Okay," Meredith nodded.

He leaned down and kissed her. "Just a friendly reminder: it's Saturday night," he said against her lips.

Meredith smiled. "Hmm, I know."

"Is Saturday naked night?" Cristina interjected.

"In fact, it is," Derek said. "So, you know, if you're planning on spending the night, I hope you brought ear plugs."

"Oh, gross," Cristina groaned, pulling her hair back into a ponytail.

Meredith leaned forward, kissing Lilly's nose. "Love you, peanut," she said. "Maybe tomorrow, you can smile for Aunt Cristina to cheer her up."

"I'd rather she smile at me than poop on me," Cristina shrugged. She waved to Lilly and swung her legs up onto the couch. "Night, kid."

"I'll be up," Meredith promised.

"Okay," Derek said as he walked toward the stairs. He patted Lilly's bottom in victory. "Mission accomplished," he told her. Lilly smiled at him sleepily and he hugged her closer. "You really are the coolest baby ever, you know that?"

...

The weight of the mattress sunk down next to Derek with Meredith's slight weight, and he blearily blinked open his eyes. The red numbers on the clock said 1:16, four hours since he'd come upstairs with Lilly, who lay sleeping between him and Meredith. "Hmm, about time," Derek whispered.

Meredith smiled apologetically in the dark. "Sorry. Cristina can be very chatty when she rants."

"'S okay," Derek yawned. "Although, you do owe me a sex rain check."

"I know," Meredith said, lightly kissing Lilly's forehead.

"Is she still here?" he asked.

"Yeah, she's on the couch," Meredith said as she gently laid down so she wouldn't jostle Lilly and risk waking her up. "I offered up the guest room, but she wanted to be as far away from the sex noises as possible."

"Thanks to her, there is no sex."

"You can barely keep your eyes open. And our daughter is in the room. There wasn't going to be sex, anyway," Meredith pointed out. "Tomorrow, we're off, but she has work. Plenty of time. Besides, she's my person. What happened to 'family is a good thing?'"

"Biologically. I didn't mean Cristina Yang by person-hood extension," Derek said into his pillow.

"Okay, if Lilly gets to call Mark, her technical non-relative, 'Uncle Mark,' then Cristina is family," Meredith upheld.

Derek considered making a rebuttal argument, but he was too tired. "Fine. But only future fictitious baby number two will make our house a four person household."

"Mhm," she replied, resting her head close to Lilly's.

"We could always have the locks changed tomorrow while she's at work..."

Meredith laughed quietly. "Goodnight, Derek."


	120. Roping & Revenge

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

**As always, thank you a million times for your patience! Enjoy! And special thanks to dakotalady, who gave me the idea for the pizza oven in this chapter! :)  
**

Meredith tiptoed out of Lilly's nursery, down the hall, and back into her bedroom. The door clicked shut softly behind her, and she crawled back into bed. Lilly was asleep in her crib, Cristina was far away downstairs, and Meredith was determined to cash in the sex rain check from last night. When she straddled Derek's waist and started kissing his neck, his eyes opened and he smiled.

"Hmm, good morning," he said. "Where's Lilly?"

"I fed her and she's snoozing away in her crib," Meredith said, pulling off her tank top and tossing it over the side of the bed. "Which means we can have Sunday morning sex."

"Horny, huh?" Derek said, chuckling when she pulled off his shirt, too.

Meredith shimmied her panties and shorts down her legs. "And naked," she said, lifting off of him. She pulled off his boxers and bit her lip adorably. "And now, you are too."

Derek wrapped his arms around her back and she leaned down, combing her fingers through his hair. "Well, this is a fun way to wake up," he said, groaning when she reached between them to run her fingers over the length of him. "Especially when you do that."

"Thought so," Meredith said. She let out a gasp which quickly dissolved into a moan when he started rubbing between her legs. "Holy crap. Derek," she panted.

He stifled her moan with a kiss, trailing his fingers down her back and landing on her ass. "You wanna... on top?" he choked out, barely able to concentrate on anything besides what her fingers were doing to him.

"Yeah," Meredith said as she raised up a little. She gripped him in her hand and gently guided him into her, moaning as he filled her. "Oh, God, Derek."

Derek swallowed thickly, trying not to move as she adjusted to him. He smiled up at her. "I love you."

Meredith splayed her hands over his cheeks and kissed him. "I love you, too," she echoed.

After a few moments, she began rocking her hips back and forth, the two of them falling into sync within seconds. Slow at first, but picking up speed at Meredith's insistence, Derek happy to let her do as she pleased. He held her hips to balance her, and she moved above him, unadulterated, wild, and completely in control.

Just as Meredith was about to twist around and ride him that way, their bedroom door swung open, Cristina on the other side. "Mer, you awake? Where do you keep the—" When she realized what she'd walked in on, she quickly retreated, pulling the door closed again.

Meredith and Derek froze, mid-action, and he looked up at her, equal parts nausea and horror etched all over his expression. "Oh, my God," he said, putting his hands over his face.

Meredith chewed on her lip, contemplating what to do, then continued moving. Derek uncovered his eyes with his hands, confused. "What the... seriously?"

"Just because she walked in doesn't mean we can't finish," Meredith said, swinging her hips in figure eights.

He was about to speak again, but she clenched around him, and his train of thought derailed completely. "Okay, yeah, keep doing that."

She smiled in satisfaction. "Thought so."

...

They finally emerged from their bedroom and went downstairs a short while later, figuring it would be best to leave a bit of a time cushion for Cristina to leave for work before showing their faces. Meredith walked ahead of him in her robe, Lilly in her arm, Derek behind them. When they entered the kitchen, Cristina was sitting at the counter with a newspaper, shoveling a spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

"Oh, my God," Derek sighed, his face already reddening.

Cristina looked up from the newspaper and waved at them with her spoon. "Morning."

"Morning," Meredith returned.

"Why aren't you at work?" Derek asked, skipping right over any pleasantries.

"OR got backed up. Surgery got pushed to noon," Cristina said. "So..."

"Common courtesy is to knock before barging into a room," Derek pointed out as he walked over to the counter.

"I'm sorry. But I swear I didn't see anything. You were both covered by the blanket," Cristina said.

Derek took a mug from the cabinet, shaking his head in disbelief. "I should've known better than to expect a groveling apology from you, Yang..."

"I said I'm sorry. We all have to live with that memory burned into our brains," Cristina said. "Would it help if I told you I made coffee?"

"Thank you," Meredith replied, knowing Derek wasn't going to say it. "Now please, let's just... not mention that. Ever again."

"Got it," Cristina agreed.

"It doesn't bother you that she walked in on us?" Derek asked, pouring himself and Meredith cups of coffee.

"It probably should, but no," Meredith answered honestly, kissing Lilly's forehead, then laying her in her swing. "It's no worse than the time Alex and Iz walked in on us having sex on the counter top at the old house."

Cristina gagged as she ate another bite of cereal. "Oh, gross."

"That's why we moved into this house," Derek said, looking at Cristina. "For the privacy."

"Okay, but answer me one question. Is there any surface of this house where you two haven't had sex?" Cristina asked. "Bathroom counter? Washing machine? Couch?"

"All of the above," Meredith said with a smile.

"Eww, I slept on that couch last night," Cristina said in disgust.

"Hey, I know where you could sleep," Derek interjected, handing Meredith her coffee. "At your own house, in your own bed."

Meredith sighed. "Okay, new topic. Are the bricks and cement getting delivered today?" she asked Derek.

"Yeah. The guy said he'd drop them off by one," Derek said.

Cristina eyed them curiously. "What do you need bricks for?"

"We're building a pizza oven on the back patio. Well, I'm building it. Mer's just gonna be the bossy supervisor," Derek said, making sure Meredith caught the smirk on his face. "It's a late birthday gift to and from each other."

"I think late is an understatement. Isn't your birthday in April?" Cristina asked him.

Derek nodded. "Yeah, well, we're surgeons with a newborn. Time isn't exactly plentiful," he said. "But now that I'm taking time off, I figured I'd start. We want to have it done while it's still summer, so we can at least use it a few times before it gets cold outside."

"Why pizza?"

"Because getting a pizza delivered out here is a pain in the ass. The delivery guy always gets lost in the woods," Meredith replied. "Besides, it's one of my favorite foods, and now, Derek is going to make it for me whenever I want. That's why it's partly my late birthday gift, too."

"See? Bossy," Derek grinned, kissing the top of her head before taking the Muesli off the shelf.

"Am I going to be invited to one of these Shepherd family pizza parties?" Cristina asked.

Derek smiled at her. "An invitation would require that you leave."

The sound of Meredith's phone ringing interrupted the bickering, and she pulled it from the pocket of her robe. "Thank God," she mumbled to herself. She read the display and her eyebrows knitted in confusion. "Bailey," she said, walking out of the kitchen in case Cristina and Derek started sniping again.

Lilly started to wriggle around in her swing once she woke up, and Derek dropped his spoon in his cereal bowl. "I'm coming, Lillybug," he said, walking around the counter. He unbuckled her from inside, then scooped her up. "Good morning, Princess."

When Lilly focused her attention on Cristina, Derek couldn't help but laugh. "Yes, Aunt Cristina is still here."

"She's my goddaughter. Don't you want me to spend time with her?" Cristina asked, pouring more Lucky Charms into her bowl.

"Spending time with her is different than squatting in my home, eating all my cereal," Derek countered.

"I'm pretty sure the Lucky Charms are Meredith's," Cristina said, just as Meredith came back into the kitchen. "What did Bailey want?"

"She asked me to work the noon to five slot at the clinic. She has a surgery, and wanted a fifth year to oversee things. You know, so the new batch of interns doesn't kill anyone trying to take out a splinter," Meredith said. "I told her I'd help her out. If I can bank five hours today, I might be able to leave early this week if I reach my weekly maximum. You don't mind, right?" she asked Derek.

Derek shook his head. "No, that's fine. Lilly and I can entertain ourselves while you're gone. We can nail down the measurements for the oven, then watch a little _Elmo's World_. It'll be fun."

"_Elmo's World_?" Cristina said.

Meredith smiled. "Lilly loves him. We got her a little Elmo doll a few weeks ago, and her eyes always light up when she sees him."

"Elmo's gonna be her birthday party theme," Derek said, blowing on Lilly's belly to tickle her and watching as she put on a big, gummy smile.

"Her birthday is ten months away. You already have her party theme?" Cristina asked with raised eyebrows.

"She's our daughter. She's our whole life. Of course we do," Derek chuckled. "You won't understand until you're a parent, Yang."

Cristina sighed. "Yeah, well, that's not gonna happen. Ever," she said. "So Mer, my shift's done at five thirty, if you wanted to wait. That way we could drive back together."

"You're staying over again?" Derek asked, not even attempting to mask his annoyance.

Meredith looked at him and shook her head subtly as she reached for Lilly. "Derek," she murmured.

"I'm gonna go take a shower," Cristina said, hopping off the stool.

Once she was out of the kitchen and out of earshot, Derek leaned against the counter, arms crossed over his chest. "Okay, I get that you're her friend, and it's only been one night, but how much longer do you think she's camping out here, ballpark?"

"Not much longer. I know her being here bothers you. Owen's working today. That's partly why I want to go in, so I can get his side of the story, and see whether I have to kick his ass or knock some sense into her," Meredith said, fixing one of the snaps on Lilly's pajamas.

"Kicking or knocking, whatever you have to do, please just get her out. I like her, but I don't want to have to lock the bedroom door every time I have sex with you in our own house," Derek said.

Meredith wrapped her free hand around his shoulder and kissed him. "I know. Don't worry. I can handle it."

There wasn't much more Derek could do than take her word for it, so he smiled at her. "Okay."

...

Meredith sat behind the desk at the nurses' station in the clinic, holding down the fort for the afternoon. The first year interns were busy doing the mind-numbing, menial tasks that interns were made to do, sutures and blood work and writing prescriptions for cough medicine, and Meredith was more than happy to let them.

Her stomach growled as she scribbled notes in a chart. She dropped her pen onto the desk, and stood up, figuring it was a good time for a snack break. The interns would be fine on their own for five minutes, and she wanted to stretch her legs. She walked out of the clinic, across the ambulance bay, and into the ER. After taking the elevator up to the first floor, she turned left toward the vending machine.

When she saw Owen punching in the code on the beverage machine next to the snack one, Meredith seized the opportunity to talk to him. It was fairly secluded, and as slight as she was, she would still be able to corner him into a talk he couldn't back out of. Owen looked over at her and smiled.

"Hey," he said.

Meredith smiled back. "Hi," she said, pulling a dollar bill from her pocket. "So, uh, I guess you know that Cristina stayed over my house last night."

"Yeah, I figured," Owen said. "You're her port in the storm during a crisis. Or, what Cristina considers a crisis. But what I might consider a conversation."

"Yeah, well, about that... she told me you brought up marriage," Meredith divulged, hoping if she instigated a conversation, he'd continue.

Owen sighed, twisting off the cap on his bottled water. "I brought up marriage. That's all I did. And instead of having an adult conversation with me, she flips out, and runs to you."

"Yeah, well, Cristina and the word marriage don't exactly mesh well," Meredith reminded him.

"Look, I know what happened last time. It's not like I got down on one knee and popped open a ring box. It's just... she always talks about how happy you and Shepherd are, and I thought it was a safe subject," Owen said.

"She says that?" Meredith asked in surprise.

He shrugged. "Yeah. You and Cristina are best friends. She sees that you and Derek can make marriage work, and now parenting. There's pictures of Lilly all over our fridge. She looks up to you. And I don't know, I thought maybe she might want what you have one day. Not right now, but eventually."

"Did you tell her any of that?"

"Yeah. I mean, I didn't have the conversation planned. We were just eating dinner on the couch. Next thing I know, she's gets pissed that I would even mention it, goes off on some tangent about eyebrows and chokers, and before I know what's going on, she grabs her keys and leaves," Owen said, throwing his hands up in defeat. "If you have any insight, I'd be happy to hear it."

"Well, the eyebrow thing... is a long story," Meredith said. "And kind of explains why she reacted the way she did. Chattel, and all that."

Owen's mouth dropped. "Chattel? Does she really think I'm like that?"

"No, she doesn't. She loves you. It's just... she just gets spooked easily when it comes to stuff like that. It's not entirely her fault. Or yours," Meredith said.

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the vending machine. "Okay, well, what do I do, then?"

"I don't know. I can't answer that," Meredith said. "All I know is that she can't live with me. I don't mean to go all _Sex and the City_ on you and be over-share-y, but this morning, Cristina walked in on Derek and me while we were..."

Owen cringed, offering an apologetic smile. "Ouch. Sorry to hear that."

"Yeah. Which is why I need the two of you to work things out. Because I'd really prefer if that didn't happen again," Meredith said.

"Can you talk to her?" Owen asked.

Meredith's eyes widened. "Me?"

"If there's anyone Cristina will listen to, it's you," Owen said.

Meredith chewed on her lower lip, fiddling with the dollar in her hand. Her plan had been to get them talking to each other; not her, getting involved in the middle of it. But she knew that if she didn't, she risked many more nights of Cristina on the couch, and she knew that wouldn't exactly go over well with Derek. So she gave in.

"Fine. I'll talk to her. But if she shows no signs of leaving, Lilly and I will be camping out with you, so we won't have to witness the eventual fight to the death between my husband and your girlfriend," Meredith warned.

Owen laughed slightly and nodded. "Okay." He smiled at her. "Thank you, Grey."

"You're welcome," Meredith said.

"And I'm sorry about the whole... Cristina barging in thing," he repeated.

Meredith stuck her dollar bill in the slot, and the machine sucked it through. "Yeah, that story stays between us," she said, pushing the button for a bag of cookies.

"Got it."

...

The drive home from work was rainy and silent, Cristina in the driver's seat, navigating the raindrops, and Meredith in the passenger seat, mulling over her conversation points. So far, her only argument was that if she stayed, Derek might actually go crazy, which would be bad, because she preferred a sane husband. It wasn't exactly compelling, but she figured it was easier than talking Cristina Yang into the merits or marriage, which she knew would be futile at best.

"Does Derek usually cook dinner, or should I stop at a drive-thru?" Cristina asked, pulling Meredith out of her thoughts.

Meredith glanced over at her. "What? Oh, yeah, usually, when he can. Lilly is kind of a full time job."

"Don't tell him I said this, or I'll kill you, but I think it's actually kind of cool that he wanted to stay home with her. I always assumed his superhero neurosurgeon ego needed to be validated by surgery," Cristina said.

"Was that a compliment?" Meredith asked.

"I'm not saying I'd ever kiss his ass, but he _is_ a good surgeon," Cristina shrugged, turning onto the dirt road that led to the house.

Meredith smiled. "He likes staying at home. I wish I could, too, but that's really not an option right now," she said. "Next July can't come fast enough."

"Big, bad attendings, rocking the navy scrubs... that's when you get all the real power," Cristina said.

"All of the lower level residents are afraid of you already," Meredith pointed out.

"Yeah, but the darker scrubs are more intimidating. You have to admit, it's hard to look threatening in powder blue," Cristina said, pulling her car next to Derek's in the driveway.

Meredith laughed, picking up her bag from the floor. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

They got out of the car and sprinted up the walkway to the house, trying to dodge the rain. Meredith pushed open the front door, overcome by the smell of something cooking. There were a lot of things she loved about Derek, but his chef skills were especially appreciated after a day at work.

She set her bag down in the foyer and smiled. "Guess he did make something."

"Good. I'm starving," Cristina said, following Meredith into the kitchen after they both kicked off their wet shoes. "You get hot morning sex _and_ home cooked meals. I kind of hate you; you know that, right?"

"Jealous," Meredith said in a sing-song voice.

"Well, yeah," Cristina admitted.

Derek looked up from the counter, smiling when he saw Meredith enter the kitchen. His smile faded a little when he realized Cristina was with her, but he didn't say anything. "Hey, I'm glad you're home. Just in time," he said, gently handing Lilly to Meredith.

"What'd you make?" Meredith asked, hugging Lilly to her chest and pressing kisses on her cheek. "I missed you, peanut," she told her.

"Homemade pizza. I've been Googling landscape designs for the oven, and it made me hungry," Derek said as he took one pizza out of the oven and set it on top of the stove. "Plus, I know you love pizza, so... win-win."

"Thank you," Meredith said, laughing when Lilly grabbed some of her rain-dampened hair and held it in her fist. "What's on it?"

"I made two. Veggie one for me. Artery clogging, meaty delight for you," he joked, taking the second pizza from the oven.

"Okay, I'm on my feet most of the day. I'm allowed to spoil myself once in a while," Meredith defended. "Is that pineapple, too?"

"Mhm," Derek said. He took the pizza cutter from the drawer and cut each pie into even triangle slices. "You know, you're lucky to have me..."

Meredith smiled at him from across the counter. "Does this mean I have to put out?"

"Well, there's no hard and fast rule, but you can if you'd like," Derek said, handing her a slice.

Cristina sighed. "Can I just have a slice before you two start doing each other on the counter top?" she requested.

Derek dropped a slice of pizza onto her dish. "Enjoy."

"Thank you," Cristina replied, helping herself to a can of soda from the fridge. "I'll be in the living room."

"Okay," Meredith said. She sat on a stool at the counter, Lilly cradled in her arm. "Thank you for feeding my friend."

"I think feeding her is a bad idea," Derek chuckled. "She's like a stray cat. Feed her once, and she'll keep coming back for more."

"Yeah, well, about that. I talked to Owen, who asked _me_ to talk to her. Apparently, the fact that I'm married makes me qualified for stuff like this," Meredith said as she took a small bite of the pizza, testing the temperature on her tongue.

"Stuff like what?"

"I don't know. Relationship crap," Meredith shrugged. "By the way, this is really good."

"Good," Derek grinned. He took two cups from the cabinet and took the bottle of white grape juice from the fridge. "So, do you have your marriage-promoting PowerPoint presentation ready?" he teased her.

Meredith laughed. "I should probably make one of those. I'm hoping the words will just come to me. If that means resorting to bribery out of desperation, I'll do it," she said as he put the juice in front of her. "White grape?"

"Or as I like to call it, wine substitute for parents," he said.

"Clever," Meredith said before taking a sip. "How was Lilly today?"

"She fell asleep a little after you left, which was good, because that's when the brick guys came by. I told them to put everything in the garage for now because I didn't want it to get rained on. Once she woke up, she got a new diaper, had a bottle and we watched Elmo, then we did some oven research. Productive afternoon, right Lilly?" he said, smiling at his daughter, who was busily sucking her thumb, watching them as they talked.

Meredith leaned down and kissed Lilly's forehead. "I missed her. Working in the clinic on a slow day is like watching grass grow. But I managed to study up for my surgery tomorrow. Plus, you know, I successfully roped myself even further into Owen and Cristina's problems, which was fun," she said.

"You rope because you care," Derek said supportively.

"Yeah, well, I have to stop roping."

"If it results in Cristina going back home, I'm all for the roping," Derek said.

"Me, too," Meredith said, clanking her juice glass against his. "To roping."

"To roping," Derek echoed.

"Are we even using that word correctly?" she asked.

"I don't know," he chuckled. "In context with you, yes. If I were having this conversation with anyone else, probably not."

Meredith smiled at him, amused. "That's sweet."

...

Derek sat next to Meredith on the couch after the three of them had eaten dinner, waiting for the start of the baseball game. He glanced at his watch. "Want me to give Lilly a bath before the game starts?" he asked.

"No, I will," Meredith said. She looked down at Lilly in her arm, who was busy playing with Meredith's finger that was gripped in her tiny hand, fascinated at how it bent when she pushed it down. "Is that amusing to you, Lillybug?" she laughed, tickling Lilly's foot lightly. Lilly smiled up at her, and Meredith smiled back. "You are so cute."

"Yes, she is," Derek agreed, leaning down to kiss Lilly's belly. "You sure? I don't mind."

"No, watch the game. I'll take care of it," she said, subtly raising her eyebrows at Derek and cocking her head toward Cristina, who was paging through a surgical textbook in preparation for her surgery tomorrow.

Derek got the hint and nodded. "Okay."

Meredith turned toward Cristina. "Come on. You're gonna help me give her a bath."

"What? Why?" Cristina asked, looking up from her pile of notes, strewn all over the coffee table.

"Because you're her godmother, and you said you wanted to spend more time with her. Bath time is the perfect opportunity," Meredith said, standing up from the couch.

Cristina sighed, saving her page with a pen and shutting her reference book. "Fine."

"Lilly would appreciate a little more enthusiasm," Meredith joked as she headed toward the stairs, Cristina begrudgingly trailing behind her.

"Lilly would appreciate her Aunt Cristina kicking ass at her cardio surgery tomorrow with Altman," Cristina amended.

"It's an annuloplasty. You've assisted on those before," Meredith said.

"Yes, assisted. Teddy said she might let me do it myself depending on how damaged the valve is once we cut the guy open," Cristina said. "So if I end up killing him, I'm blaming you."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Okay, you do that," she said, walking into her bedroom, then the en-suite bathroom off to the left. "Ready for your bath, Lilly?"

"What do you need me to do?" Cristina asked.

"Get the bucket from the cabinet under the sink, and fill it up with warm water until the tub is like half full," Meredith said, pointing to the pink baby tub on the bathroom counter.

Cristina did as Meredith asked, and Meredith took off Lilly's baby-sized sweatpants and tee shirt. She waited until the tub was filled up before removing Lilly's diaper, then tossed it in the trashcan. "Okay, here we go," she said, gently putting Lilly into the tub.

Lilly kicked her feet and wiggled her toes under the water, splashing a few drops onto Cristina. "Does she enjoy this, or is she building up to a freak out?" Cristina asked, wiping the water off her jeans with her hand.

Meredith laughed, cupping her hand under the water and pouring it onto Lilly's upper body. "She actually loves it. I don't think she's ever cried in the tub."

"Well, if she's just gonna lay there and behave, how is this a two person job?" Cristina asked.

"It's not. I just thought we could talk or whatever," Meredith said casually as she reached for the baby shampoo.

It took Cristina all of five seconds to figure out Meredith's agenda, and she narrowed her eyes. "You talked to Owen."

Knowing that denying it wouldn't help the situation, Meredith just nodded in admittance. "Uh... yeah. I did," she said.

"And you thought trapping me during this cutesy baby bath time would make me more inclined to talk to you about my love life?" Cristina assumed.

"Well, no. Usually Derek and I give her a bath together, but he's been the on-duty parent most of the day, and I wanted him to be able to relax. This was just the only time I could think to get you alone," Meredith said, sopping a wet wash cloth over Lilly's dark hair.

"Uh huh. Okay. Well, whatever he told you—"

"He told me you were just talking over dinner," Meredith interrupted, squirting a dollop of Lilly's shampoo into her hand. "He said he wasn't trying to propose or anything."

"I know that."

Meredith lathered the shampoo through Lilly's hair, making sure not to get any in her eyes. "So, what's the problem, then?"

"There is no problem," Cristina defended.

"You just... don't ever want to marry him?" Meredith asked, trying to tread lightly.

"I'm not that person. I don't want the house and the two-point-five kids and the picket fence crap. I'm a surgeon. I don't want to settle," Cristina said.

Meredith glanced over at her. "Do you think _I_ settled?"

"No. You married Derek and built a house and had a baby because that's the life you wanted. You were both ready," Cristina explained.

"Yeah, but look how long that took us. It doesn't happen overnight," Meredith said. "I'm not saying you have to have the house and the kids, or even get married. But at least hear him out. I mean, look at me and Derek. If I bolted every time he wanted to have a conversation with me, we wouldn't have any of this."

"You kind of did bolt, though. A lot," Cristina said.

"I know. But then I realized that was stupid. It didn't get us anywhere, or change how I felt about him. I knew he was the one. He could piss me off, but I still loved him. And the whole talking thing? Really not that bad," Meredith said, putting her hand behind Lilly's back to lean her forward, then carefully rinsing the shampoo out of her hair.

"So, what are you saying? That I should go home and pour my heart out to him?" Cristina asked.

"All I'm saying is that you should hear him out, because he loves you. You owe him that much," Meredith said.

"Well, what if marriage and babies are a deal breaker? Surgeon is the only title I ever wanted. That, or Super Woman. Wife and mother? No," Cristina said, wiping a drop of water off Lilly's forehead before it could drip into her eye.

Meredith smiled at the gesture. "Well, that was very motherly," she couldn't help but point out.

"Just because I don't have the mom gene doesn't mean I'm a cold-hearted bitch. I don't cackle evilly when babies cry," Cristina replied.

"Hey, I'm not saying you need to have a baby. That gives you more time to spoil mine. Right, Lilly?" Meredith said, smiling at her daughter. She squirt some of the bedtime bath soap in the water and swished it around with her hand. "And if he wants kids, then that's something you have to know. But you won't know unless you talk to him. And really, I think you need to give the guy more credit. He loves you, Cristina."

"Hmm," Cristina groaned. "I hate you."

"You love me. You just hate that I'm right," Meredith said, gently cleaning Lilly off with a soapy wash cloth. "And because Owen's on call tonight, I'll even let you stay over again. But tomorrow, you're going to talk to him. And if you don't, and you end up back over here tomorrow after work, you're going to be giving Lilly a bath by yourself while Derek and I have sex on the couch. Got it?"

"Eww," she said. "Fine. I'll talk to him."

"Good."

"By the way, if you plan on having sex tonight, please let me know ahead of time, so I know to use the downstairs bathroom instead," Cristina requested.

Meredith rolled her eyes amusedly as she rinsed Lilly off. "Okay, we weren't even loud this morning. If you wouldn't have walked in, you wouldn't have even known."

"Yes, but if I know what's going on behind the closed door, I don't want to be near it," Cristina said.

"Fine. If things start getting hot and heavy, I'll text you," Meredith promised, just to appease her. "I'm really glad you don't know what we're talking about, Lilly; otherwise, you'd be scarred for life," she said. She looked to Cristina. "Can you grab that yellow duck towel from the shelf? I'm gonna pick her up and pass her to you."

"She's done?" Cristina asked, taking the towel and shaking it out.

"Easy, right?" Meredith said. She picked a wet Lilly out of the bathtub and kissed her forehead before letting Cristina take her. "Wrap it around her so she doesn't get cold, or she might pee on you."

"That really happens?" Cristina asked as she swaddled Lilly in the towel.

Meredith laughed, dumping the bathwater into the sink. "More than you'd think, yeah. She just peed on Derek a few days ago."

Cristina made a face. "And you really wonder why I don't want kids?"

"Shut up."

...

After showering, Derek walked out of the bathroom and into his bedroom, smiling when he saw Lilly laying on Meredith's chest, sound asleep in her monkey pajamas. "Someone was tired, huh?" he chuckled, peeling back the covers and getting into bed.

"She fell asleep right after I burped her. I think having super fun Aunt Cristina here wore her out," Meredith giggled softly so as not to disturb Lilly.

"Oh yeah, she's a laugh a minute," Derek said sarcastically. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and she leaned into him. "How was bath time? You guys talk about anything?"

"She saw through my plan about three seconds after Lilly was in the tub. Apparently, I suck at being subtle. But yeah, we did, actually. I convinced her to go talk to him."

"Really?" he asked in surprise.

Meredith nodded. "Yep."

"How'd you do that?"

"I don't really know. I just started talking. Nothing really scripted, just about me and you," Meredith told him. "About how stupid it is to be freaked out by conversation, when that's basically the thing that can solve the problem. I mean, break-up sex was dirty and fun, and we got a lot of orgasms out of it, but what did it do besides keep us from talking?"

Derek hugged her closer, grateful that the days of sex without relationship benefits were long gone. "Hmm, I know."

"Now look at us. Conversation-having, married grown-ups with an awesome baby," Meredith said.

"A very awesome baby," Derek said. He looked at his daughter and smiled. "God, she's amazing, isn't she?"

"I know. I don't get how Cristina can think this is settling," Meredith said, trailing her hand up and down Lilly's back.

Derek's smile dissolved. "Did she say that?"

"She didn't mean us. She meant her. To her, being anything other than a surgeon is trying for second best. That's just who Cristina's always been. She has that in common with my mom. I don't hold it against her. For me, though, just being a surgeon would be settling. I mean, at the end of the day, surgery is surgery. It's your job, you know? As much as I love my job, it's not my whole life," Meredith said. She kissed the top of Lilly's head, smiling when Lilly scrunched her nose in her sleep. "This is my life. This is the life that I wanted. You and her."

"Me, too," Derek said.

"Thanks for sticking with me; otherwise, I probably would've settled, spending my childbearing years inside the four walls of the hospital, and turning to stray cats and tequila for companionship," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "Wow. That bleak, huh?" he said. "But really, I knew you were the one a long time ago. Even if you didn't want me to stick, I was sticking."

She put her hand on his cheek and kissed him. "Me, too."

Her phone buzzed on the nightstand, and Derek reached over to pick it up, so that Meredith wouldn't jostle Lilly. "Cristina texted you. Want me to open it?" he asked.

"Yeah, go ahead," Meredith said.

"I need to pee. Are you two having sex or not?" Derek read off the screen. He rolled his eyes and began typing a response.

She craned her neck, trying to read the message he was sending back. "What are you saying?"

"I told her to put in some earplugs or up the volume on her iPod for a while," he said in satisfaction.

"I'm too tired to have sex tonight," she laughed.

"Me, too. I just like to mess with her," Derek grinned, pressing send and putting her phone back where it was. "Payback's a bitch."

Meredith smiled. "Normally, I'd think that was mean, but she did walk in on us this morning. I think that warrants a little torture."


	121. Ending on a Good Note

**Disclaimer: The show belongs to Shonda; although, I wish I could adopt Meredith and Derek for myself so she wouldn't be able to mess with them anymore.**

**So, so sorry for the long wait. My laptop battery died, and this chapter was trapped in a Word document that I couldn't access until today. But now, everything is fixed, and I'm able to post. Enjoy!**

Cristina was officially gone, out of the house, and back to living with Owen, thanks to Meredith's gentle nudging. She had only been staying with them for two days, but it was enough to almost drive Derek crazy. So now, as he sat on the couch with Lilly, sipping his cup of coffee, he reveled in the peacefulness. No barging into rooms without knocking, no grubbing cereal, and no sarcastic, unprompted commentary.

Derek glanced at his watch and sighed. Meredith had worked an overnight shift, and was scheduled to come home an hour before Derek had to go in. Professionally, the whole opposite shift thing worked; but personally, it wasn't exactly ideal, and they didn't get to see each other nearly as much as they'd like.

He kissed Lilly's forehead. "Mommy's gonna be home soon, Lillybug. You two get to spend the whole day together. But she's gonna be tired, so maybe you guys could take a nice, long nap together," he said, chuckling when she smiled up at him. "How's that sound?"

His pager buzzed on the end table and he picked it up to read it. "911," he read out loud. "Damn it." Derek reached for his phone and quickly dialed the ER nurses' station at the hospital, waiting three rings before someone answered.

"Nurses' station. This is Olivia," came the hurried voice at the other end.

"Hi, Olivia. This is Dr. Shepherd. I was just paged 911, but Dr. Grey isn't home yet, and I have my daughter. Do you know why I was paged?" he asked.

"Five car pileup on the highway. Nelson and Weller are already swamped with the incoming, and the ER is still overrun with lots of close head injuries. I think Dr. Grey is down here now, actually," Olivia said, barely audible over the hustle and bustle in the background.

Derek sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Alright, uh, is there any way you could put her on the phone for one quick minute if she's close by?"

"Yeah, give me a second to go find her," Olivia said.

"Okay, thank you," Derek replied. He peeked into the back of Lilly's diaper and smiled amusedly. "You have impeccable timing, Princess," he said, walking over to the bin of baby supplies next to the bookshelf. He grabbed a fresh diaper, wipes, and powder, then retook his seat on the couch, his phone tucked between his shoulder and ear.

"Hey, hang on a second," Meredith said into the phone. "Don't leave him in the hallway! Take him to trauma three!" she yelled out to someone. "Sorry, I'm here. What's up?"

"I was paged 911, but it sounds like you're not making it out of there any time soon," Derek said, peeling back the adhesive tabs on Lilly's diaper.

"Yeah, it's pretty messy," Meredith sighed, her voice tired and frazzled after having already been on call the night before.

Derek chuckled. "Yeah, same here," he said, holding up Lilly's legs so he could clean her.

"What?"

"Dirty diaper," Derek explained.

Meredith smiled on the other end. "I'm jealous," she said. "Okay, well, we're already on the OR board for surgery in an hour."

"Together?" Derek asked as he slid the fresh diaper under Lilly's bottom and sprinkled her with powder.

"Yeah. The patient is almost eight months pregnant with twins, and she has a depressed skull fracture. She was admitted under my name, so I got put on the case. The other neuro attendings are scrubbed in somewhere else, so they paged you in," Meredith said, holding her hand over the receiver. "Meghan, check the supply closet for extra intubation trays! If there aren't any, run over to the clinic!"

Derek checked his watch again. "Is there anyone there who could watch her while we're in surgery?"

"I don't know. Everyone is down here now. Just bring her with you. We'll figure it out," Meredith said.

"Okay," Derek said, pulling Lilly's onesie over her head. He took the dirty diaper and picked her up off the couch. "I'll be there soon. I just need to get Lilly dressed, and get some of her stuff packed."

"Okay. Bring extra bottles just in case. And call me when you're parking. I'll see if I can sneak away for five minutes," Meredith said. "Love you both."

"Love you, too. See you soon," Derek said, ending the call. He shoved the phone in his pocket, then practically jogged upstairs. "Looks like you get to come to the hospital, and see what Mommy and Daddy do for a living," he told Lilly, tossing the old diaper into the disposal after he walked into her nursery. "We'll see if we can get Uncle Mark or someone to hang out with you for a few hours. If not, you might be donning a surgical mask in your Babybjorn."

Derek gently laid her down on the changing table to get her dressed, and Lilly smiled up at him. He laughed. "Good, I'm glad you're on board."

...

Meredith stood at the OR board with Derek, rocking back and forth on her heels, Lilly hugged to her chest. She hadn't seen her daughter since last night, and the thought of leaving her again to go scrub into surgery was close to unbearable. She scanned her eyes up and down the schedule. "Everyone is scrubbed in somewhere."

"There has to be someone," Derek said, running a hand through his hair.

"We're not leaving her with a random nurse or an intern," Meredith said. "I want her with someone we know."

"So do I," Derek agreed. "If worst comes to worst, just one of us can scrub in."

Meredith shook her head. "You're the only available neurosurgeon, and the patient is already high risk because of her pregnancy. And I really can't afford to pass up a neuro surgery if I want to finish residency on time," she said, sighing. "Damn it."

"Mer, relax. We'll figure something out," Derek promised.

"I know. I'm trying really hard to stay calm. I'm just exhausted, and I was really looking forward to going home after thirty-six hours on my feet," Meredith said, checking her watch for an ETA on when they were scheduled to scrub in.

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, and she quickly pulled it out, seeing Bridget's name on the display. "Hello?" she answered.

"Hey. I would've walked right up to you, but there's some fancy red tape on the floor that makes me persona-non-surgeon-non-grata," Bridget said.

Meredith turned around, and saw Bridget leaning against the wall in the perpendicular hallway, near the waiting area. She hung up the phone, smiling as she and Derek walked toward her. "What're you doing here?" Meredith asked.

Bridget dropped her phone into her purse. "I was here to have lunch with Mark, but he got pulled into surgery because of the freeway wreck. I was just about to walk to the elevators to go back to my car when I saw you guys standing there with Lilly," she explained.

"Yeah, we're scheduled to go into surgery in twenty minutes," Derek said.

"And I'm guessing you haven't lined up a sitter yet?" Bridget assumed, peeking over Meredith's shoulder to smile at Lilly.

Meredith laughed. "No, still working on that."

"Let me take her," Bridget offered.

"Oh, no, that's..." Meredith started, shaking her head guiltily.

"I'm happy to help you out. Lilly's my niece. That's what I'm here for," Bridget said. "And I'm not a doctor or anything, but I'm pretty sure hospital policy frowns on babies in the OR."

"Are you sure? We don't want you to feel obligated just because you're already here," Derek said.

"Yes, I'm sure. My sister has three girls, and I watch them all the time. Plus, I'm a kindergarten teacher. I'm around kids all day. One, well-behaved baby is like a dream," Bridget said.

Derek looked at Meredith, and she smiled at him, then at Bridget. "Okay. But only if you're absolutely sure."

"I am. She'll be perfectly fine. We'll have fun," Bridger assured them.

"Thank you. We owe you one," Derek said. "There's extra bottles and diapers in her bag. I fed her and changed her before I got here, so she should be okay until three o'clock or so. FYI, she loves _Elmo's World_, and she's recently become a fan of peek-a-boo." He reached into his pocket and handed Bridget his spare car key from his key ring. "Her car seat's in my car. If it's easier, you can just drive it if you want."

"Oh, it's fine. I'll move it," Bridget said, taking the key, and then Lilly's bag from his shoulder.

"She's kind of the perfect baby, but if you have any problems, just call. I don't care if one of us has to leave," Meredith said, giving Lilly one last hug and kiss before she handed her to Bridget. "We love you, peanut."

"Have fun, okay?" Derek said, kissing the back of Lilly's dark head. "You're a lifesaver. Thank you," he told Bridget.

"No problem. Now go fix brains, and don't worry about anything. We'll have a blast," Bridget promised, letting Lilly look curiously over her shoulder.

"Bye, Lillybug. We'll see you in a little while. Love you," Meredith said, smiling sadly as Bridget walked with Lilly toward the elevators. She sighed as her daughter went further and further down the hall, and she leaned into Derek. "I feel like a terrible parent."

"We didn't plan this. We don't even _have_ a babysitter. This has only happened once since she was born. I say once in three months is a pretty damn good record," Derek pointed out.

"I guess," Meredith said halfheartedly.

"Alright, let's go to pre-op. I want to see the patient before we go into surgery," Derek said, putting his hand on the small of her back. He knew leaving Lilly was hard for both of them, but he hoped that being in the OR would distract her. "How did she present when she came in?" he asked her.

"Her GCS was only three," Meredith said as they walked down the hallway.

Derek looked over at her. "Three?" he echoed. "So she was unconscious."

"Yeah. Her car flipped over, so there was blunt force trauma, which caused the depressed skull fracture. She's slightly hypotensive, but her heartbeat is strong enough for surgery," Meredith said. "Same goes for the babies."

"How far along is she?" Derek asked.

"We estimated between thirty-one and thirty-three weeks. According to the paramedics, she was wearing a seat belt, which kept her abdomen from being too jostled around," Meredith said as she pulled back the curtain when they reached the pre-op area.

Derek flipped open the chart, and began reading all of the notes that both Meredith and the paramedics had written down. "She's a Jane Doe?" he asked.

Meredith nodded. "For now. There was no ID on her. The police said if they recovered any info. at the scene, they'd bring it here. She probably had a purse or something, but so far, no news," she said.

Derek clicked on his penlight and examined the woman's pupils, checking to see if there was any movement in her eyes. "There's a little dilation, but not much."

"Does she have a chance?" Meredith asked.

"GCS of three, little pupillary response... I don't know. I've seen people come back from worse. She's pregnant. I'm gonna do everything I can," Derek said, frowning at the woman's rounded belly under the blanket.

Meredith took his hand and squeezed it gently. "Yeah."

...

Staring into an open brain was always a rush, wrought with thrills and challenges, a meticulously interwoven puzzle that could be destroyed with a single knick or slice or hiccup. But now, as Derek stared into his pregnant patient's open brain, the puzzle's pieces were already in dismay, crushed by the shard of skull pressing against it. He'd been standing there for ten minutes in silence, trying to find a way to navigate the mess.

Meredith stood on the ready with suction, waiting for him to make a move, any move. She glanced over at him. "Are you going to start?" she asked him.

"I'm thinking," Derek said. "I just... how do I?"

"Alright, well, think out loud. Let me help," Meredith said.

"Her brain is a lot more damaged than the scans made it seem. Her frontal lobe is practically crushed by the skull fragment. I have to lift it out from underneath. But even if I can do that, there's a risk of hemorrhage or brain swelling; not to mention, a damaged frontal lobe is a recipe for her living as a vegetable," Derek said.

"You have to try," Meredith said.

"I know," Derek said, taking a breath under his mask. "Okay, be ready to suction."

Meredith moved closer to him and nodded. "I'm ready."

Derek carefully began removing the embedded skull piece from the patient's brain, making sure not to push it deeper or accidentally jut into the surrounding tissue. Meredith suctioned the blood around the area so Derek could have a clear view of the surgical field.

"No jagged edges," Derek said, finally freeing the rounded piece of skull from her brain.

"Good," Meredith said in relief. She glanced at the monitor. "BP is 90 over 60."

"How are the babies doing?" Derek asked.

"Systolics aren't as high as they should be, but so far, both babies are holding steady," the OB resident said, sitting by the fetal monitor.

"She's bleeding more than normal. I can't place the titanium mesh until it slows down," Derek said.

"BP is dipping down. She's at 80 over 40," the scrub nurse said.

Derek shook his head in frustration. "Damn it. She's getting bradycardic. Push one of atropine. Let's see if we can get her BP back up," he called out.

Another scrub nurse administered the medicine, and they all glanced at the monitor, hoping to see a steady climb to a normal heart rhythm. But as soon as it went up, it came back down again, eventually plummeting so much that the patient flatlined.

"Start compressions. And page any available OB attending to do a crash-C," Derek said.

"You want to take the babies out?" Meredith asked.

"I don't _want_ to. We _have_ to. There's over a ninety percent chance of survival, as long as we get them out in time," Derek said.

"Damn it," Meredith whispered.

"Dr. Halloran is next door in OR 4. She's scrubbing out now," the scrub nurse announced after she hung up the phone.

"Dr. Halloran delivered Lilly. The babies will be okay," Derek attempted to comfort her, trying to focus on the profuse brain bleed and not the inevitable death of a pregnant woman he couldn't save. "Make sure to page the NICU, and tell them two preemies are coming up within the next ten minutes."

"There's no chance she could live?" Meredith asked.

"Her brain is hemorrhaging too fast, and her frontal lobe was crushed on impact. Son of a bitch," Derek said, grabbing another suctioning tool to help Meredith drain it out. "I thought she might have a chance, but there's just too much damage."

"Both fetal heartbeats are starting to drop," the OB resident announced. "She's losing too much blood."

Dr. Halloran entered the OR, and was immediately given a fresh pair of gloves after re-scrubbing. "What've we got?" she asked beneath her mask.

"Jane Doe, pregnant with twins. She keeps flatlining, and has practically no heart rhythm. The babies need to come out," Derek said, packing the woman's mangled brain with gauze to keep the pooled blood from spilling onto the floor.

Dr. Halloran walked over to the OR table, catching a quick glance at the patient. "Damn it. She's not a Jane Doe. This is one of my patients," she said. "Okay, scalpel."

"You know her?" Meredith asked.

"Celeste Mackley. She was scheduled to come in for a routine sonogram this afternoon, but she never showed up. I figured she got busy with work or something. She was involved in the wreck?" Dr. Halloran assumed, making the incision across the woman's abdomen.

"She was hit on the driver's side, and the whole car flipped. They had to slice the car door off to get her out of it," Meredith said, echoing what she had been told when the patient had been brought into the ER. She exhaled, trying to keep her emotions at bay. "How far along is she?"

"Thirty-three weeks. Boy and a girl. Scissors," she requested of the scrub nurse. She gently popped the amniotic sac of the first baby, a girl, and took her out, immediately handing her off to the OB resident. "Dr. Grey, could you come take baby number two over to the warmer once I get him out?"

"Sure," Meredith said, handing the suction to Derek. She stood on the other side of the table and watched as Dr. Halloran broke the other sac, freeing the second baby. Meredith swallowed thickly when she saw how small the boy was, gently swaddling him in the blanket after Dr. Halloran cut the umbilical cord.

Seconds later, the woman's weak, thready pulse stopped registering on the monitor, and it became a resounding shrill beep of an irreversible flatline. Just as Derek was about to call time of death, there was one tiny cry, followed seconds later by the other. He nearly lost his breath at the sound, a sound that was both full of hope, and an enormous punch in the gut. Two babies taking their first breaths while their mother took her last.

He blinked back the tears in his eyes and cleared his throat. "Time of death: 13:42."

...

Meredith sat on a bench in the resident lounge, packing her bag to go home. She'd only gotten six hours of sleep in the last forty-eight, and all she wanted to do was go pick up Lilly, and get under the covers with her and Derek. But Derek's shift wasn't over until seven o'clock that night, if his brain shunt surgery scheduled in a half hour went well. She sent a quick text to Bridget, saying she'd be there to get Lilly soon, then put it in her pocket.

"Hey," Derek said as he entered the doorway.

Meredith smiled. "Hey."

"I just checked on the twins up in the NICU. No neurological issues. For being preemies, they're fighters. Both strong and stable so far. And they're co-bedded, so that'll help," Derek said, sitting down next to her on the bench.

She looked over at him. "Any word on whether or not there's family? Husband or boyfriend or something?"

Derek sighed and shook his head regretfully. "Her husband was killed overseas, back when she was three months pregnant. She moved out here and got a job. Fresh start, you know."

"Is there anyone? Any relatives at all?" Meredith asked, her eyes hopeful.

"They're still trying to get in contact with people. The police still haven't brought in any cell phone or wallet or anything. Other than what Dr. Halloran knows about her, there's not much to go on."

"Sucks," Meredith frowned.

"Yeah," Derek said. "I'll check in on them before I leave, make sure they're okay."

Meredith sighed. "They have no one."

"They have each other," Derek reminded her. He pressed a kiss to her temple. "And they have us, too."

"Us?"

"For now. Until we find them some people, we can be their people. Fake, surrogate, hospital parents," Derek said chuckling lightly. "So far, Lilly approves of us. I think they would, too."

"Okay," Meredith said. She saw a picture of Lilly and Derek in her cubby and smiled. "I'm gonna go get her. I know I saw her a few hours ago, but I miss her so much."

They got up off the bench, and Derek wrapped his arms around her. "Imagine what it'll be like when she goes off to college in eighteen years," he said.

Meredith rolled her eyes amusedly. "I don't even like thinking about what a wreck I'll be on her first day of preschool, let alone college," she said as she hugged him back. "You're still scheduled to go into surgery?"

"Yeah. I should be in an out in an hour, barring any complications."

"Okay." She put her hands on his cheeks and kissed him. "Love you."

"Hmm," he murmured against her lips. "You usually save those kinds of kisses for home. Or behind locked doors here."

"This is our first alone time in two days. I wanted to take in the moment," Meredith said, fixing the collar of his white coat. "Wanna walk me out?"

Derek reached for her hand after she slung her bag over her shoulder. "Sure; let's go."

...

Meredith walked up the steps to Mark and Bridget's house, waving at Lilly when she smiled at her through the glass door. Bridget used her free hand to open it, letting Meredith inside. "Hey. I didn't think you'd be done so soon," Bridget said.

"Yeah, our patient died on the table," Meredith said, trying to stifle a yawn. "How was Lilly?"

"She was perfect," Bridget said. She kissed the baby's cheek and handed her over to Meredith. "Seriously, I don't think I've ever heard her cry."

Meredith laughed. "Oh, believe me, she cries. She just likes to show off in front of company," she said, hugging Lilly to her. "God, I missed you."

"Not a good afternoon, huh?" Bridget assumed.

"I'm used to patients dying; but when it's a pregnant patient, it's enough to make me want to quit and never go back," Meredith sighed, following behind Bridget to sit on the couch.

Bridget patted Meredith's arm in sympathy. "I'm sorry. I know it's hard. Mark says the same thing sometimes. Did the baby make it?"

"Twins, actually. A boy and a girl. We got them out in time, thankfully. They're small, but we're hopeful they'll pull through. But the dad died a few months ago, so instead of just being down one parent, they have neither. Just a crappy way to start your life, you know?" Meredith said as Lilly grabbed a handful of hair in her tiny fist. "I know I shouldn't let stuff like this bother me. It's just part of the package."

"That would be hard on anyone. And you're a mom. Of course a case like this is gonna hurt," Bridget said. "Is there any family around?"

"We don't know yet. My OB is actually the one that delivered them, so she's probably gonna pull her file for emergency contacts or something. She's a good doctor, so at the very least, they'll be taken care of while they're in the hospital," Meredith said.

"That's good," Bridget nodded before pausing. "Not to change the subject, but this OB... you'd recommend her?"

"Oh, yeah. She's really sweet. And she doesn't make it awkward when I see her around the hospital. You know, considering she's seen the parts of my body that I'd prefer only Derek see," Meredith managed to laugh before she raised her eyebrows in suspicion. "Wait, are you..."

"No, no. I'm not, I promise," Bridget interrupted. "We're just... we started trying a few weeks ago. My OB/GYN is retiring, and I need to find someone new."

Meredith's mouth went agape in surprise. "You're trying?"

"Yeah. We haven't told anyone. Mark hasn't even told Derek. We know we just got married in May, and were planning to wait a while, but we're ready. Honestly, Lilly's the reason we decided to go for it," Bridget said, smiling at Lilly who was sucking on the ends of Meredith's hair.

"Really?" Meredith smiled.

"You guys are so happy. And we're so in love with Lilly. We really want that, too," Bridget said, folding up Lilly's duck blanket and putting it back in her bag.

"You're both gonna be great parents," Meredith said as she reached out and wrapped her arm around Bridget to hug her. "And until it happens, just enjoy the trying. It's mind-blowingly fun, and it pays off," she said, holding up Lilly as proof. "I have all the conception books, too, if you want them. And it's not just stuff about fallopian tubes and cycle tracking. There's some pretty hot sex tips."

"Oh, yeah?" Bridget asked interestedly.

"Yep. There's even a chapter on the best positions for conceiving a boy or girl. And, you know, Derek and Mark are pretty set on eventually becoming in-laws, so a nice boy for Lilly to marry would be great," Meredith joked, kissing the top of Lilly's head.

Bridget laughed. "Okay, got it."

...

**For those that are interested, I'm writing a MerDerZola Christmas fic, and hope to have it posted sometime**** on Sunday. So, be on the lookout! :)**


	122. Stand In Parents

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows. I just wish I did.**

**Sorry for the wait! The holidays are a busy time of year, so I held off on posting until this week. Happy 2012! Enjoy!  
**

Meredith lay on the couch in Derek's office, shoes off, pillow behind her head, and eyes closed. It wasn't often that she got small windows of time without diapers or crying or surgery, and having the chance to lie down for ten minutes actually felt foreign to her. But still, she was basking in the rest, however brief.

Her morning had been spent in surgery with Dr. Nelson, cutting brains and saving lives, using whatever free time she had to check on the premature twins that had been born two weeks ago. So far, they were holding strong, a little over four pounds each. And because there was no family around to hold them and talk to them and spend time with them, Meredith did her part as a stand-in parent. She let the babies hold her finger and lie on her chest; she even changed their diapers and their clothes if time allowed. And if she had to be away from Lilly to be at work, Meredith was actually grateful. She knew Lilly was being taken care of at home, and the least she could do was care for the two of them at the hospital.

Just as she felt herself slipping into a nap, the door to Derek's office opened, and he walked in, food in one arm, Lilly in the other. Meredith opened her eyes and smiled at them. "Hey," she said, sitting up and scooting over on the couch so he could sit.

Derek dropped down next to her and set the bag of food on the table. "Hey," he echoed, leaning in to kiss her. "Were you sleeping?"

"No, I wasn't. Kinda wish I was, but no," Meredith laughed. She reached for Lilly and pressed kisses to her forehead. "Hey, you. You look very pretty today. Daddy is getting good at coordinating your outfits."

"Good, right? It's breezy outside, and I didn't want her to be cold, so I went with the leggings. Lilly approves, I think," Derek chuckled. "How's your day been?"

"Good. I scrubbed in with Nelson this morning, and he practically let me resect the patient's tumor by myself," Meredith said. "I was awesome. You should've been there."

"I wish I was. Congratulations," Derek said, kissing her again.

"Hmm, thank you," Meredith smiled against his lips. "Then I went up to check on the babies. Annie's been showing signs of RDS, but Dr. Halloran has her on surfactant to help her lungs develop. Adam is doing well, though," she said.

"Annie and Adam?" Derek asked, taking the food out of the bag so they could eat lunch.

Meredith smiled, shrugging slightly. "They're two weeks old. And I felt bad not calling them anything, so I just gave them names. They don't have any family, but they deserve names."

"You're getting attached to them, huh?" Derek said.

"Well, I see them every day. Besides Dr. Halloran and the NICU nurses, we're the only other people that really spend any time with them. I don't know. I just feel bad, I guess. I'm trying to be a good pseudo-stand-in-fake mommy," Meredith said, combing her fingers through Lilly's hair. "Don't worry, though. You're still the love of my life, Lilly."

Derek smirked. "So, Lilly dethroned me for that title?"

"You both are. But as far as babies go, no one will ever trump her," Meredith said. She kicked off her shoes and put her feet up on the couch. "What'd you get for lunch?"

"Wraps. Turkey for me; chicken caesar for you," Derek said, taking off the tinfoil and handing it to her.

"Thank you," Meredith said before taking a bite.

"So, my mom called today. She asked if we wanted to fly out there for Thanksgiving," Derek said as he twisted off the cap to his water bottle. "I told her I'd talk to you about it."

Meredith mulled it over in her head as she chewed. "As long as I could get the time off, I'd really like to go. And I know everyone really wants to meet Lilly. I'm pretty sure they all think we're just hiding her away."

"Probably," Derek laughed. "If we go, maybe we could leave on Wednesday, and come home Saturday; that way, we'd at least get Sunday to relax before going back to work."

"I'll talk to Alex. It's only September, so if I could plan out my November schedule now, it should work. It's not like Alex is going to say no, anyway. You know, free house and all for his wedding present. He may be Chief Resident, but I hold the real power," Meredith teased.

Derek smiled. "Yes, you do."

Meredith's phone vibrated, and she pulled it from her pocket. "Bridget," she said before answering it. "Hello?" she said. "Hey, no I'm just eating lunch with Derek and Lilly." She licked some dressing from her finger, then nodded. "Yep, fifth floor, then turn left. You can't miss it. And Mark should be there any minute. His surgery was running long." She paused as Bridget spoke. "Okay, have fun. Talk to you later."

Meredith ended the call and dropped her phone back into her pocket. "She just wanted to know where the, uh..."

"OB/GYN wing is," Derek finished. "I've been working here for five years. I know the code for fifth floor to the left," he chuckled.

"Look, you can't say anything. I told her I wouldn't—"

"Mark told me," he interrupted.

"He did?" Meredith asked in surprise.

"Yeah. A few days ago. I think it's great. They're ready," Derek said. "Is everything okay? Why's she coming here?"

"Oh, I recommended her to Dr. Halloran. Her OB retired, so she needed to find someone else. It's just a standard visit," Meredith said. She smiled down at Lilly who was cradled in her mother's arm, sucking her thumb. "I already told Bridget she needs to have a boy. Lilly needs a good guy friend, someone who could be a prom date, maybe a husband..." she hinted jokingly.

Derek nearly choked on his water and he cocked his head at her. "A husband?"

"Maybe thirty years from now; not now, obviously," Meredith said, rolling her eyes in amusement.

"Yeah, and as far as proms go, panties stay on, and nothing goes on behind a closed door. Got it?" he said to Lilly, who smiled at him with her thumb in her mouth.

Meredith laughed. "I'm pretty sure you've told her that before."

"And I'm gonna keep saying it until she gets in the limo on prom night," Derek said.

"You know, minus the adultery and patient death, that night was pretty damn good," Meredith said. "I actually did a consult in that exam room today. Seriously, every time I walk into that room, I swear I get turned on. Which probably isn't a good thing, now that I think about it."

"Still wouldn't trade that memory for anything, though," he said.

"Me, either."

"So, what time do you think you'll be done tonight?" Derek asked.

"Well, I'm aiming for six, which means a few hours of Lilly time when I get home, then naked time with you," Meredith said, opening her chip bag. "I've had dirty prom thoughts in my head since this morning when I did that consult. I could really use some you-know-what."

"I can do that," Derek grinned.

"Thank you."

...

When lunch ended, so did the blissful bubble of family time, and once again, Meredith stood at the OR table with Dr. Nelson, peering into an open brain. She was ready to assist him in placing the clip on their patient's aneurysm when he stepped aside. "Blood flow is controlled. Would you like to clip the aneurysm, Dr. Grey?"

"Absolutely; thank you," Meredith said, looking to the scrub nurse. "Bipolars, please?"

The scrub nurse handed her the instrument, and Meredith was able to get a stable grasp of the aneurysm on the first try. Satisfied that she had a handle on it, she nodded. "Okay, clip and appliers?" she asked the nurse, who then handed them to her. "Thank you."

Meredith carefully applied the clip to the neck of the aneurysm, then released it, pinching off the aneurysm from the parent artery. She let out a breath and smiled underneath her mask. "Clip is applied," she said. "And now, I'll do the matador move to make sure it's on properly. Needle, please?"

She punctured a hole in the aneurysm to ensure there was no blood flowing in. "Okay, everything looks clear," she said.

Dr. Nelson surveyed her work, then nodded in satisfaction. "Excellent. You're giving that husband of yours a run for his money," he said in good humor. "Would you like to close?"

"Sure; thank you," Meredith replied.

Just as she was about to remove the retractors, her pager went off across the room, and one of the scrub nurses quickly picked it up. "Dr. Grey, there's an emergency up in the NICU. One of the Mackley twins has stopped breathing. Dr. Halloran is requesting you."

"Crap," she whispered under her mask. "Okay, can you tell her I'll be there as soon as I can?"

"You can go if you need to. I'll close," Dr. Nelson offered. "You've done the hard work. I can take it from here."

"Okay, thank you," Meredith said, gently handing him the retractor.

She stepped away from the OR table, and walked out of the OR, flinging off her gown, mask, and gloves, and scrubbing out as fast as she could. Her heart raced as she bounded up the stairwell to the NICU on the fifth floor, attracting the curious looks of those she passed by on the way. She'd become attached to these babies over the last two weeks, and there was no way in hell she was letting either of them die. After gowning up again, and putting on a pair of fresh gloves once she got there, Meredith entered the NICU, straight over to the little nook where the twins were.

"What happened?" Meredith asked.

"Her apnea monitors went off, she started getting bradycardic, then she turned blue. She's still not breathing on her own, so I had to intubate her," Dr. Halloran said, pumping the ambu bag. "We think she's having a stroke."

"A stroke? But she was fine. I mean, she had RDS, but she seemed to be doing well," Meredith said in disbelief. She glanced over at Adam, who was alone in their shared isolette, watching the action unfold as the team of doctors helped his sister, his blue eyes more alert than Meredith had ever seen.

"That's the thing with preemies. Just when you think they're in the clear, things can go right back downhill," Dr. Halloran said, handing Meredith the ambu bag. "Page down to the OR floor, tell them we're bringing her down," she requested of one of the nearby NICU nurses. She turned to Meredith. "Is Dr. Shepherd here?"

"No, he's home. I could call him," Meredith said as they wheeled the baby out of the NICU and into the hallway.

Dr. Halloran shook her head. "There's not enough time. Do you know if Nelson or Weller is available?"

"Weller's surgery just started, but I just scrubbed out of Nelson's OR. He should be finishing up any minute. He's in OR 3," Meredith replied.

They passed by the nurses' station, and Dr. Halloran looked over at the nurse behind the desk. "Can you call down to OR 3, and see if Nelson can have a fellow close, please? We need him immediately."

"Right away," the nurse said, picking up the phone.

Meredith saw the elevator doors opening down the hall, and she waved her arm to signal to the people getting on. "Hold the doors, please!"

The cluster of people waiting to board all stepped aside, allowing Dr. Halloran, Meredith, and the baby ahead of them. "Thank you," Meredith said graciously as the doors closed in front of them. She looked at Annie and reached into the isolette. Annie's hand wasn't nearly as warm as it usually was, a sign that she wasn't getting enough oxygen, and Meredith swallowed thickly.

"Do you think she'll make it? How long did she stop breathing before you intubated?" Meredith asked Dr. Halloran.

"Under a minute, which, for a preemie, is still too long. I'm hoping her lungs are developed enough to withstand the anesthesia. If Dr. Nelson can evacuate the clot in time, she has a fighting chance," Dr. Halloran said as they stepped off the elevator once they reached the OR floor.

"Dr. Halloran, OR 4 is being prepped and they're setting up the portable CT," the charge nurse said. "Nelson should be scrubbing out now."

"Thank you," Dr. Halloran replied, noticing the nervousness on Meredith's face. "Dr. Grey, are you okay? I'd understand if you didn't want to scrub in."

Meredith shook her head. "No, I'm fine," she said. As tempting as it was to pass this surgery onto someone else, she knew she needed to go in there and do everything she could to help save Annie's life. But even if she couldn't, she had to know she did everything in her power to try.

"Okay. Prep her, and help position the CT, then scrub in," Dr. Halloran said before going into the scrub room.

"Okay."

In the few seconds Meredith had before she and the OR team started the emergency surgery, she squeezed onto the baby's tiny hand again. "I know it's scary, but you're gonna be fine. You just need to hang on, okay?"

...

The only sounds in the NICU were the beeping of the monitors and the small, intermittent fusses from the newborns in their isolettes. Meredith sat in the rocking chair with Annie, the baby's tiny body resting on her chest.

"It's okay. I'm here," Meredith said softly. Despite all of her willpower, tears stung her eyes and she wiped them away with the back of her hand.

When she heard the automatic doors of the NICU open with a swoosh, Meredith turned her head, surprised to see Lexie walk in. "Hey," Lexie said, smiling at her.

"Hey," Meredith echoed. "What're you doing here?"

"I was delivering some charts and I saw you in here. I had some free time, figured I'd come say hi," Lexie shrugged, dropping down in to the rocking chair across from the one Meredith was sitting in. "What are you doing?"

Meredith looked down at Annie, who blinked tiredly up at her. "She had a stroke this afternoon. Dr. Nelson got the clot out in time, but she went too long without oxygen, and her heart muscle is underdeveloped and weak. So are her lungs. She coded twice on the table. Dr. Halloran doesn't think she's gonna make it through the night."

"Oh my God," Lexie said with a frown. "Is this one of the twins that came in for a crash C-section? The one whose mom died on the table?" she asked.

"Yeah," Meredith said, cocking her head toward Adam's isolette next to Lexie's chair. "They don't have anybody else, so I've been spending as much time with them as I can. If I can't be home with Lilly, I want to be here. I named them. I know that's probably bad, but..."

"What're their names?" Lexie asked, free of the judgment or mocking she would surely get from Cristina.

"Adam and Annie."

Lexie peered into Adam's isolette and smiled at the tiny newborn. "Any significance?"

"I just like those names. I'm pretty sure if Lilly had been a boy, her name would've been Adam," Meredith said, letting Annie grab a weak hold of her finger.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Derek and I were really picky about name choices. We started talking about names like two days before we found out we were having a girl, but Adam was one of our favorites," Meredith said, laughing slightly. "So if the next one is a boy, we have to come up with something else."

Lexie reached into the isolette and rubbed her finger over Adam's arm. "You think he'll be okay?"

"I hope so. If Annie dies, he'll have no one. But he's a fighter. He has to be okay," Meredith said, pulling the receiving blanket more snugly over Annie's shoulders to keep her warm despite the largely oversized pajamas that she was practically swimming in. "You can hold him, if you want. Normally, I switch back and forth, but she needs me more than he does right now."

"Can I?" Lexie asked.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded.

Lexie gently took Adam from his isolette, careful not to unhook any wires or jostle him around. She wrapped his blanket around him, then sat back down, holding him against her chest in the same way Meredith held Annie. Lexie smiled at him. "He's so cute."

"Yeah, so is she. Celeste—that was their mom's name—she was blonde. I guess they got the dark hair from her husband," Meredith thought out loud.

"He's not in the picture?" Lexie assumed.

Meredith shook her head. "No, he died overseas. We never contacted any family either. I think Dr. Halloran scoured the country for Mackleys, but nothing ever came up."

"Any potential parents lined up?"

"No. Not yet, anyway. Dr. Halloran wanted to hold off until they were more stable before any kind of adoption thing got started. Being preemies, they're already high risk. Giving potential parents false hope isn't fair. I mean, Annie was doing relatively well until this afternoon. And now?" Meredith sighed. "I don't know. And I went all Izzie and got myself emotionally involved. The whole thing is a mess."

"It's good. It's good that you care. You're a mom. Don't apologize for it. And you're the kind of person that embraces something like that instead of trying to fight it off," Lexie said supportively.

Meredith smiled. "Remind me to thank my daughter for that."

...

Derek leaned against the headboard of his bed, Lilly in one arm, a neurosurgical journal in the other. "See here, Lilly? For an intraventricular meningioma, Daddy likes to use what we call a keyhole approach. You go in behind the ear, so it's minimally invasive," he taught her, showing her a diagrammed picture from the journal.

Lilly stared at it with wide-eyed interest, as though she really was soaking in whatever knowledge he had to offer. Derek grinned, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "Either you're intrigued, or you're trying to poop. Guess I'll find out in a minute or two, huh?" he chuckled.

He looked up when he heard the soft padding of Meredith's feet coming down the hall, and into their bedroom. "Hey," he said. "Wasn't your shift over an hour ago?"

Meredith nodded as she walked toward their bed. "Yeah," she said, sinking down next to them.

Derek frowned when he saw the defeated, worn look on her face, and he cocked his head on worry. "Everything okay?"

"I, um... Annie died tonight. I didn't want her to die laying in her isolette, so I held her. She fell asleep on me, and a few hours later, she just..."

"Meredith," Derek said softly, dropping the journal onto his lap, and wrapping his arm around her. He kissed her temple. "I'm so sorry."

"Yeah. Me, too," Meredith said. "She had a stroke this afternoon. Her body was just too weak to handle it."

"I'm glad you were there," Derek said. "She needed you there."

"She was holding onto my finger, then her hand just went limp. She was two weeks old." Meredith bit her lip, and a tear slipped from her eye. "It's not fair. Stuff like that shouldn't happen, but it does. It happens every day. And I know I'm supposed to not let myself care, that it's just part of the job."

"But things like that make you never want to go back," Derek finished for her.

"Yeah," Meredith said.

Derek gently passed Lilly over to Meredith, who hugged her like she never wanted to let go. "I love you so much," she said, pressing kisses to Lilly's cheek. "How was she tonight?"

"Perfect. She had a bath and a bottle. She'll probably be hungry again soon, so you'll be able to feed her again before she falls asleep," Derek said.

"Okay, good," Meredith whispered, breathing in the smell of Lilly's baby shampoo.

"How's Adam doing?" he asked.

"He's stable. All alone, but stable," Meredith said. She let Lilly lie on her chest, and she ran her fingers up and down her back. "It's weird, seeing him in the isolette by himself. He has no one now."

"He will. Odds are, he should've died before he was born, but he didn't. He's fighting, and he's getting better every day. He's gonna pull through, and be just fine," Derek said, reassuring and confident. "He still has us. We'll be there for him until the second he gets some people."

Meredith blotted her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt. "Okay."

"Think of it this way. Don't days like this make you even more thankful for her?" Derek said, smiling at their daughter, who had since found her thumb and was making suckling sounds with her mouth.

"Yeah. It really does," Meredith managed to smile, too.

"Well, I have some good news that should brighten your mood a little bit," Derek said.

She turned to look at him, curious. "What?"

"Mark called. Bridget got an all clear from the doctor. They're right on track for making a baby," he said. "Although, technically, they've already been trying."

"Good. That's good," Meredith said in relief. She patted Lilly's diaper-covered, pajama-covered bottom. "They'll probably want to use you for practice, Lilly."

"Parent boot camp."

"Exactly," Meredith said. "Is it weird that I'm kind of jealous?"

"Of what?" he asked.

"That they get to have oodles of baby-making sex. Remember how much fun we had?" Meredith said.

Derek smiled. "Hmm, yeah. Spending entire days off naked; having sex between surgeries; waking up in the middle of the night with you on top of me..."

"Hey, I was fertile and horny," Meredith defended.

"All of that hard work paid off," Derek said.

She leaned down and kissed the top of Lilly's head. "Yes, it did."

"See? Things always work out. And Adam's gonna get bigger and healthier, and find a family that loves him," Derek promised her, reaching his finger out to Lilly, who grabbed onto it.

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder and smiled. "Okay," she said, soaking in the quiet time that she'd been wanting all day. "Were you teaching Lilly about keyhole surgeries?"

"Yep. She's a neuro junkie. I know it," Derek said.

"And if she marries Mark's little plastic protégé son, they'll be a brilliant surgical duo," Meredith said.

Derek laughed. "I'm still not sure how I feel about my daughter marrying a Sloan..."

"Lilly could marry Prince Charming, and he still wouldn't be up to par with your standards," Meredith teased him, peeking into the back of Lilly's diaper.

"I'm petty sure Prince Charming is fictional," Derek pointed out.

"I don't know. If you take away the white horse, and replace it with a scalpel, I'd say you come pretty close," Meredith upheld.

He turned his head and looked at her with equal parts confusion and amusement. "I can't tell if that's a compliment, or you're making fun of me."

Meredith reached for a fresh diaper off her nightstand and handed it to him. "It was a compliment."

"Aah, flattering me so that I'll change the surprise in Lilly's diaper?" Derek guessed.

Meredith just smiled at him. "Maybe."


	123. Night Out

**Disclaimer: Not mine. But I'm thrilled that Meredith and Derek got Zola back. That little girl owns my heart!  
**

Meredith gently laid Lilly in her crib, pressing a kiss to her forehead, careful not to wake her up. She was full and sound asleep after nursing, which meant there was time for a shower. Even better, a shower with Derek. And that was one window of opportunity Meredith was not willing to pass up. She drew Lilly's shade to keep the room sun-free, then tiptoed toward the door to the nursery.

"I love you, peanut," Meredith whispered. She crossed the threshold into the hallway, and walked back down the hall toward her own bedroom. She heard the water spray hit the floor of the tub as Derek turned on the shower.

She grabbed the baby monitor off her nightstand, then gently knocked on the half-open door, peeking her head in. "Hey," she said.

Derek turned around just as he was about to step over the edge. "Crap, you scared me," he said.

"Who else would it be?" Meredith giggled, biting her lip as she tracked his naked body from head to toe with her eyes. "Lilly's asleep, so I thought I'd take a shower with you."

"Yeah?" he asked as a smile spread over his face.

"Do you mind?"

Derek laughed. "Why would I mind? Get naked," he said.

Meredith set the baby monitor down on the bathroom counter, then shimmied out of her pajama pants and panties. She pulled off her shirt, and tossed it onto the floor. "Good morning," she said, taking his hand as she stepped over the side to join him.

He closed the shower door, then pinned her against it. "Hmm, good morning," Derek returned, cupping her face and kissing her.

"I swear I didn't come in here for sex. Well, not at first," Meredith said against his lips. "What time do you have to be at work?"

"In an hour."

"Plenty of time," Meredith said, reaching for her shampoo in the caddy. "Bathing first, then sex, because my hair is dirty."

"Okay." Derek took the shampoo from her and squirt some of it into his palms.

"What're you doing?"

"Turn around," he said.

Meredith smiled, and spun around on her heels. "Okay," she said, biting back a moan when she felt him lather shampoo into her hair. "Screw the sex. Can you just stand there and do that for an hour?"

"Hmm, I want sex," Derek said, kissing her neck.

"We will. Just... yeah. Right there," she said, chills covering her body as he massaged her scalp with his fingertips.

"You saying things like that doesn't really help with the waiting..."

She leaned into him and closed her eyes. "Sorry. That sounded dirty," she admitted.

"Your ass pressed against my you-know-what doesn't help either," he chuckled.

Meredith turned around, taking his own shampoo from the caddy. "Your turn then."

"Seriously?"

"Yes. Turn," she said, making a swivel motion with her finger.

Derek turned around, and she squeezed some of his shampoo into her hand. She stood up on her tiptoes, then pulled her fingers through his hair. She smiled in satisfaction when she heard a pleased groan leave his mouth. "Now you're the one being dirty."

"What?"

"Making sex noises," Meredith accused, trailing her hands from his hair to his shoulders. She wrapped her hands around the front of him, meandering her fingertips toward his groin. When he moaned again, she moved her hand closer to where she knew he wanted it, hoping to elicit another sound from him.

When her hand reached its destination, she smiled in satisfaction when she discovered he was already hardening. "Wow."

"What?"

"You. All I did was run my fingers through your hair," Meredith said.

Derek turned around, cupping her cheeks again to kiss her. "Hmm, what can I say? You're very good at turning me on," he said.

Meredith pulled him toward the water spray and they stood under it. Soap trailed down both of them, and onto the floor, racing toward the drain. She smiled at him, then handed him her loofah. "Nothing good is going to come of this, but here."

"Oh, I disagree. Something very good is going to come of this," Derek grinned, grabbing her vanilla-scented body wash and squeezing a few drops onto the sponge. He lathered it up, then rubbed it over her shoulders, and down her back. The throbbing in his groin intensified when she let out a breathy sigh. "Okay, all clean," he decided.

"I'm pretty sure you skipped eighty percent of my body," Meredith said.

He put the loofah back on the caddy hook and spun her around. "Hmm, I don't care," he said, unable to keep himself from kissing her again.

"Me either."

Derek picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. "I can't wait any longer," he said as he kissed her neck.

Meredith laughed. "Impatient man," she accused, moaning when she felt him against her, hard and ready. "Okay, come on. Do it."

"Oh, I'm impatient?" he said.

He pushed into her, and Meredith had to bite her lip to keep from screaming. "Holy crap."

"Seriously." Derek paused, shaking as he tried to keep his composure, and he readjusted Meredith in his arms.

"Please don't drop me," she requested as she wrapped her legs more snugly around his waist. Derek gently gripped her ass, and she laughed. "There we go. Thank you."

He started to move, and Meredith buried her face in his shoulder to keep from being too loud. Her breath hitched into a moan when Derek bent backwards. She reeled at the sensation, her fingertips pressing into his back. "Holy... yeah. Bendy thing. Keep doing that."

"What about... your version," Derek panted. "With your leg... over my shoulder."

"What? Right now?" she asked.

"Why not?" he asked back.

Meredith shrugged. "Fine," she said, holding onto Derek as he gently set her on her feet. Before Derek could wrap his arm around her again, her leg was over his shoulder, and he laughed.

"Even after all these years, it still amazes me that you can do that," Derek said, holding her ankle in one hand, and putting the other on her lower back.

"Does my freakish flexibility turn you on?" Meredith asked. She kissed him before he had a chance to answer, and when he pushed into her again, she had to steady herself on one foot, and try not to fall onto the floor of the shower in pleasure.

"Yes, it does," Derek answered, though by that time, Meredith forgot she'd even asked the question.

They heard Lilly fussing over the baby monitor on the other side of the shower door, and they froze. "Crap," Meredith said. "Crap. Crap. Crap."

"Wait, just... she might stop," Derek said.

When the noise over the monitor quieted, Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. Good. Go. Shower quickie."

Derek picked up the pace, keeping a firm grip on her as he moved. Meredith was already balancing herself on one foot, and the last thing they needed was a shower injury that may or may not result in an embarrassing trip to the ER. He kissed her neck before moving his lips lower to nip on her clavicle. It wasn't long before he felt her tightening around him. "I'm... are you..."

"Yeah. I..." her sentence dissolved into a moan as she hit her peak. She rode out the waves, wrapping her arm around his neck, and the feeling of her drove Derek over the edge, too.

"Oh, God. Meredith," he groaned, dropping his head onto her shoulder.

When the short-lived bliss subsided, they stood there, Derek leaning against the shower wall for support, Meredith limp in his arms. She licked her lips as her breathing returned to normal. "I... we should..."

"Give me a sec," Derek said, blinking the water from his eyes. When he was sure he had his balance again, he gently took her ankle from his shoulder, and helped her set it back on the floor. "You okay?" he asked.

"My legs feel like Jell-O," she giggled, holding his hand while she steadied herself.

"Hmm, is that a good thing?" he asked.

Meredith smiled at him. "I just had a mind-blowing orgasm. Wobbly legs are well worth it," she said. She moved away from the water spray and rung out her hair. "Lilly's probably waking up. I'll get her; you can finish up."

"Fine, but you owe me a loofah sponge-down," Derek grinned, reaching for his soap.

"Deal," Meredith said, giving his wet, naked body a once-over before she opened the shower door and stepped over the side.

She patted herself dry and slipped her robe on, then walked back down the hall toward Lilly's nursery, biting her lip in satisfaction. Sex and a shower had happened within a fifteen minute span, which was a decent start to the day. She opened Lilly's door, and peeked into her crib, smiling when she saw that Lilly was awake, and smiling back at her.

"Hi, Lillybug," Meredith said softly, scooping Lilly out of her crib. She pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm not going to get into specifics, but I'm really glad you held off on crying. Mommy and Daddy were able to... multitask," she said, leaving it at that.

She gently set her down on the changing table and unsnapped Lilly's pajamas to change her. When she pulled down the front of the diaper, Meredith scrunched her nose, reaching for the baby wipes. "I should've stayed in the shower, and saved this one for Daddy."

...

Days off were rare gifts, ones that, before becoming a parent, meant studying or going to the post office or the grocery store and catching up on simple errands that she didn't have the leisure time to complete as a surgical resident. But now, Meredith basked in every minute spent with Lilly, even if it meant playing peek-a-boo for hours on end.

Lilly sat in her boppy seat on the couch in her strawberry-patterned footie pajamas, and watched with fascination every time Meredith covered her face with her hands.

"Peek-a-boo!" Meredith shouted softly, moving her hands away.

Lilly gave her a big, gummy smile that melted Meredith's heart every time, and she smiled back at her. "You are so cute," Meredith said, leaning in to kiss the baby's cheek. "I never thought I'd ever play peek-a-boo in my life, but I would sit here all day if you kept smiling like that."

Lilly looked at her in anticipation, and Meredith laughed. "Okay, again," she said, hiding her face. She waited a few seconds, then took away her hands. "Peek-a-boo, Lilly!"

As expected, Lilly smiled again, wider this time, and Meredith couldn't help but pick her up and hug her. "I love you," she said, breathing in the flowery, powdery smell of her baby shampoo.

There was a light knock at the front door, and Charlie hopped off the couch, trotting toward the foyer. "I hope whoever that is doesn't judge us for being in our pajamas at noon," Meredith said, cradling Lilly in her arm and following Charlie.

Izzie waved as best she could on the other side of the glass, carrying large bags in both hands, and Meredith quickly opened the door for her. "Hey," she greeted. "What are you doing here?"

"I was bored this morning, so I went a little overboard with baking. There's no way Alex and I can eat all of it, so I figured I'd drop some off over here," Izzie shrugged. "Hope you don't mind."

Meredith could smell something resembling apple cinnamon wafting in the air, and she smiled. "You can bring food over here whenever you want, day or night."

"Okay, good," Izzie said, following Meredith into the kitchen. "Oh, by the way, Derek told Alex to tell me to tell you that Adam is off the apnea monitor, and might get bumped down to the regular nursery if he can finish all of his feedings over the next three days. Not sure what the context of all that means; I'm just the messenger."

"He's a baby in the NICU. His mom died on the OR table after a car wreck a few weeks ago. Then his twin sister stroked out and died, too. Her lungs were too weak to withstand surgery. His dad died over in Iraq, so he has no one. Derek and I have been filling in as pseudo parents. He's such a good baby. We just wish there was more we could do for him," Meredith said.

Izzie frowned. "Oh, that's so sad," she said. "But he's lucky to have you two. You obviously care about him."

"Yeah, we do. I know things will work out; it's just the not knowing part that's hard," Meredith said, hugging Lilly closer to her.

"Things _will_ work out. They always do," Izzie echoed. "Until then, how's my Lilly doing?"

"She's good. We're just having a lazy Saturday," Meredith said.

Izzie set the bags down on the counter, then reached out her hands. "Hand her over," she said.

Meredith laughed, gently passing Lilly into Izzie's arm. "We just spent the last hour playing peek-a-boo. She's very smiley today."

"Meredith Grey, Child of Darkness, plays peek-a-boo?" Izzie asked in disbelief, bouncing on her heels with Lilly looking over her shoulder.

"Yep. I play peek-a-boo and change diapers and I sing songs. I think Lilly approves of me," Meredith teased, peeking into the bags.

"Aww, you sing to her? What, like lullabies?" Izzie asked.

"Yeah, sometimes. Lullabies are more Derek's thing. I mostly sing along to whatever's on the radio. "Single Ladies" or Lady Gaga. Occasionally some Duran Duran."

"So, Mommy's teaching you the importance of your man putting a ring on it, huh? Well, that's good. It's never too early to learn," Izzie told the baby playfully.

"Hey, you mock, but she loves it. I grab a hairbrush or a spoon, and she'll watch my concerts for hours. We even have dance parties, don't we Lilly?" Meredith said.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. I mean, I know it's corny, but she's my baby. I don't care if I make a fool of myself if it makes her happy. Plus, it's kinda fun," Meredith said.

"Of all the incarnations of Meredith, I think I like this one the most," Izzie said.

"And which one would that be?"

"The mommy one."

Meredith smiled at her daughter. "That's how I feel about Derek. I mean, I always knew he'd make a good dad, but to see him with her is just... I don't know how to explain it. He's a world class surgeon, and he put his career on hold for Lilly and me. He gave up cutting brains open and saving lives to be here with her, and give baths and bottles, and watch_ Elmo's World_. That's the most romantic thing he's ever done for me. I know that sounds silly, but..."

"No, it's not," Izzie cut in. "There's not too many guys out there that would do that, but Derek's one of them. I think that's pretty damn awesome."

"Me, too," Meredith said softly.

Izzie scanned the kitchen, taking notice of the bottles in the sink, burp cloths slung over the chairs, and piles of laundry waiting to be loaded into the washer. She looked to Meredith. "So, I take it you two don't get out as much as you'd like?"

Meredith shrugged. "Ehh, we try. It's hard with alternating schedules and a three month old baby." She laughed in spite of herself. "We almost had to stop having sex this morning because she was fussing over the baby monitor. Luckily, she stopped, and we were able to, you know."

"Finish?" Izzie filled in, amused.

"Yes," Meredith admitted. "And not to be porny, but it was _shower sex_, which doesn't happen nearly as often as it should."

"Wow."

"Anyway, we make the most of it. Last weekend, Derek picked up a movie on his way home from work, and we watched it together after Lilly fell asleep. We ordered pizza had a semi-date night. It didn't matter that we were both in sweatpants, folding baby laundry. It was just nice to spend time with him," Meredith said, taking the containers of food out of the bags.

Izzie hopped up onto a stool at the island counter, then turned Lilly around to sit in the crook of her arm. "When's the last time you guys went out?"

"Um..." Meredith flipped backwards through her mental calendar, and bit her lip. "I think when Derek's mom visited for Lilly's baptism. She practically kicked us out the door and told us we had to."

"That was when Lilly was three weeks old. Now she's three _months_ old. I think you're due for another," Izzie said.

"Oh. No, that's—"

"Come on, why not? I'd watch her over here," Izzie tried to persuade her.

"What about Alex?"

"I'd bring him along. We don't have any plans," Izzie said.

Meredith smirked. "Yeah, because I'm sure he wants to spend his Saturday night babysitting."

"Don't make me play the guilt card. I'll do it," Izzie warned.

"What guilt card?" Meredith asked.

Izzie let Lilly grab onto her finger and hold it in her tiny grasp. "I was supposed to watch Lilly on your anniversary, but she stood me up."

"That's because she was gassy and cranky. Believe me, that would've been fun for neither of you," Meredith laughed, reaching into the cabinet for two plates.

"Fine. But you still owe me," she upheld. When Meredith didn't budge, Izzie added to her argument. "Wouldn't it be fun to get out of the house for the night with Derek? Joe's been asking how you are. You haven't been there in months."

"I know. I miss him," Meredith said, taking a knife and two forks from the drawer and walking around the counter. She sat down next to Izzie, smiling at how relaxed Lilly looked with her. "Fine. As long as Derek's not too tired when he gets home from work, you can watch her."

"Really?" Izzie asked.

Meredith sighed playfully. "Yeah, well, when you bring a bakery's worth of food to my house, it's kinda hard to say no," she said, biting into the apple cobbler.

"All part of my plan," Izzie said proudly.

"I don't doubt that."

...

"Okay, I have her pajamas laid out on the changing table. She had a bath this morning, but if you get bored, feel free to give her another one. She loves the tub. Bottles are in the fridge. She likes them a little warmer than lukewarm, which is about twenty seconds in the microwave. What else, what else..." Meredith rattled off as she went through the checklist in her head.

Alex sat on the couch, trying not to laugh at Meredith's worrisome mommy side. He looked down at Lilly, who was resting in his arm. "She wasn't always like this, you know." Lilly smiled up at him with her thumb in her mouth. "You're cute, kid," he said, smiling back at her.

"We'll be fine," Izzie promised for the tenth time. "She's such an easy baby. I could leave, and even Alex could manage on his own."

"Pizza, baseball, Iz's chocolate cake in the kitchen... as long as Lilly doesn't poop, we're good," Alex said.

"See? Nothing to worry about," Derek said, putting his wallet in his back pocket.

Meredith dropped down onto the couch to zip her boots. "Oh, that reminds me. Extra diapers are next to her pajamas on the changing table. There's powder there, too."

Izzie rolled her eyes. "Leave. Now."

"We're going," Meredith said. She leaned over the couch and kissed Lilly's nose. "We'll be back, peanut. Have fun with Uncle Alex and Aunt Izzie. We love you. And distract Aunt Izzie so she'll stop cleaning."

"I clean because I care," Izzie said, already folding a freshly laundered basket of baby clothes next to her on the couch.

"We're just going to Joe's, so we shouldn't be long," Derek said, kissing Lilly's forehead. "Love you, Princess."

"Just go and have a good time. We can hold down the fort," Izzie said.

Derek put his hand on the small of Meredith's back and the two of them walked toward the front door. "Thanks again, guys. We appreciate it," he said.

"No problem," Alex said. "Just one keg party, we swear," he joked.

"Very funny!" Meredith called out, stepping out the door first.

Derek grabbed his keys off the table in the foyer and closed the door behind him after he walked outside. "So, this was a surprise, huh?"

"Well, it's almost the end of September, and our last date night was the end of June. As much as I hate to agree with Izzie, she's right. We need some 'us' time," Meredith said, sliding into the passenger seat after Derek unlocked the doors.

He sat down in the driver's seat, buckling his seat belt. "We do. And it'll be fun."

"I have a stack full of pictures in my purse to show Joe," Meredith laughed as she pulled on her own seat belt. "I used to be the girl that went to bars to get drunk and pick up hot guys for sex. Now, I'm the breastfeeding, off-alcohol mother who goes there to show off pictures of her baby to the bartender."

"I happen to love both of those Merediths," Derek said, backing out of the driveway. "How exactly did Stevens convince you to get us to go out?"

"Cobbler and guilt."

Derek laughed. "Well, that'll do it."

When they arrived at Joe's twenty minutes later, the walk down the steps and into the bar felt strangely familiar, but still foreign. Everything looked the same; the only thing that changed was them. From a married couple that went there a few times a week, to parents that usually spent their nights in with their baby.

The bells hooked on the top of the door jingled when they entered, and when Joe spotted them, he waved his hand in the air and smiled. "Hey, you two! Long time, no see!"

"Hey, Joe," Meredith said as she and Derek walked toward the bar.

"Good to see you again," Derek greeted.

"Double scotch, single malt?" Joe guessed, reaching for a glass from the shelf.

"Thank you," Derek nodded.

Joe handed Derek his drink, then looked to Meredith. "How about you? I'm guessing no straight tequila?"

"No, I think those days are over, at least for a while," Meredith smiled. "I'll just have water with lime, please."

"So, between Cristina and Izzie, I've already seen about a hundred pictures of her, but please tell me you brought some with you," Joe said as he filled her water glass.

"Yes, we did," Meredith said. She set her bag on the bar stool and rummaged through it until she found the small stack. "Here you go," she said, swapping the pictures for her drink. "There's a double of the one on top that you can keep, if you want."

"God, she's gorgeous," Joe complimented. "And that smile... sorry, Shep, but she looks just like Mer."

"You think so? Usually, Derek gets all the credit for that," Meredith said, taking a sip of her water.

"Meredith went through fifteen hours of labor. It's only fair that Lilly looks like her, too," Derek teased.

Joe flipped through each picture, the smile on his face widening with each one. "And to think, this all started because the two of you walked into my bar that night."

"Yeah, well, there's a reason this bar is an institution around here. And it means even more to us," Derek said, slinking his arm around Meredith's waist.

"If it's alright with you, could I hang this up on the bulletin board?" Joe asked, cocking his head toward the picture collage of friendly patrons hanging behind the bar.

"I'm sure if Lilly could talk, she would be honored," Meredith giggled.

"Good. Now, whenever someone asks who that adorable baby is, I can do some humble bragging about how fate used my bar to get her parents together," Joe said with a smile as he stuck Lilly's picture to the bulletin board.

"That oughta help you sell a few more beers," Derek grinned, tossing a few dollars onto the bar for his scotch.

"Couldn't hurt," Joe agreed, pushing the money back toward Derek. "First round's on the house. I'm just glad to see that you're both still alive..." he joked.

"I know, we suck," Meredith sighed playfully. "If it wasn't socially frowned upon to bring babies to bars, we'd have Lilly in here every weekend."

"Well, until she's old enough, I at least wanna see you two in here more than once a year," Joe said.

"Our friends pretty much hold raffles on who gets to babysit her, so we should be able to work something out," Meredith promised.

"Good," Joe said. "So, can I get you something to eat?"

"We're gonna go find a booth, so we'll browse the menu," Derek said.

Joe handed Meredith back the stack of pictures and smiled. "Okay, just let me know."

Meredith and Derek walked over to a nearby booth, far enough from the bustle and noise that they had some privacy, and each took a seat on opposite sides. "I missed it here," Meredith said.

"Me, too," Derek said. "Especially considering most of our alone time happens in bed or in the shower... not that that's necessarily a bad thing."

"Very true," Meredith smirked, reaching for a peanut from the basket.

"So, I called my mom yesterday," Derek said.

Meredith laughed. "A little non sequitur, jumping from shower sex to your mom, but I'll roll with it."

"Even if I tried to find a segue from one to the other, I wouldn't be able to," Derek chuckled. "Anyway, I had some time between surgeries, so I figured I'd give her a call. We got to talking, and she gave me the usual sister rundown. Anyway, she told me that Amy and Tom were looking to adopt."

"Really? Since when?" she asked.

"Well, Tom was adopted," Derek said.

"I didn't know that," Meredith said, cracking open a peanut shell.

"Yeah. His biological mother had him when she was a teenager. He was placed with his adoptive parents the day after he was born. They adopted two more kids after Tom. It's always been important to him, so when he and Amy got married, they knew it was something they'd eventually want to do. And Kyle is two now, so they're ready for another baby."

Meredith reached across the table and squeezed Derek's hand. "That's great. I'm happy for them."

"Yeah, well they applied over a year ago, but so far, they've had no luck. They've had a home study, passed all of their clearances, and now they're just waiting. They were supposed to adopt a little boy back in March, but the birth mother changed her mind at the last minute. It's been hard on them," Derek said.

"Oh my God," Meredith frowned.

"Yeah," Derek sighed, before perking up a little. "But then, I told my mom about Adam."

"_Our_ Adam? Baby Adam?" she clarified.

"Yeah," Derek said, unable to contain the grin that slowly spread over his face. "So, twenty-four hours later, one thing led to another. My mom called Amy, who called her adoption social worker, who got in contact with Seattle Grace's social worker."

Meredith cleared her throat to keep from choking on her water as she put the puzzle pieces together in her head. "They want to adopt him?"

"Yeah."

"Oh my God," Meredith repeated.

"Nothing's set in stone yet, but they're hoping to fly out here next week," Derek said.

Meredith raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"Kyle, too?" Meredith asked. Derek nodded. "Well, where are they staying?"

Derek shrugged. "I don't know yet. I didn't want to offer up our house until I checked with you."

"Derek, they're your family. Well, _our_ family. I don't mind if they stay with us. We have room," Meredith said.

"Okay, then. I'll call them in the morning," Derek said.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me this sooner."

"I was going to tell you when I got home tonight; then the chance to go out and have Mommy and Daddy time fell into our lap, so I figured I'd wait. This seemed like a good place to do it," Derek grinned, taking a sip of his scotch before holding it up.

She clanked her glass against his. "You're always full of surprises, Derek."

"That's a good thing, I hope?"

Meredith smiled at him. "Yes, it is."


	124. Shepherd Family Visit

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

"Well, I think you officially have more clothes than Daddy and I combined," Meredith said, putting a pair of Lilly's folded leggings atop the growing stack on the coffee table.

Lilly looked at Meredith from her boppy seat next to her on the couch, and stretched her tiny limbs before popping her thumb in her mouth. Meredith laughed. "Hey, don't fall asleep on me. Daddy's going to be back soon with your aunt, uncle and cousin from New York. And they've never met you, so they're probably going to make a fuss."

Meredith pulled one of Lilly's onesies from the laundry basket at her feet and folded it on her lap. "To be honest, I'm kinda nervous about having a toddler here. But I guess it'll be a good glimpse into what we can expect from you in three years, right? Although, you're a girl, and girls like tea parties and dolls. Boys like destruction and dead bugs," she said. "We'll see how it goes. Hopefully when all is said and done, Adam will be your new little cousin."

Car doors shut in the driveway, and Charlie's ears perked up in excitement. He trotted toward the front door. Meredith smiled, scooping Lilly from the boppy seat and into her arm. "They're here, Lillybug."

She walked into the foyer, and pushed open the door with her free arm, so they could enter. Charlie ran in circles around their legs, always happy to have company, and Tom leaned down to pet him. "Hey, buddy."

Amy set Kyle on his feet, and he was nearly eye level with the dog. Meredith smiled at the toddler, who timidly walked over to his dad. "You can pet him, Kyle. He's friendly. He might just lick your face, though," she giggled.

"Go ahead, sweetie," Amy encouraged, before turning her attention to Meredith and hugging her. "It's so nice to see you again. We haven't seen you guys since last Thanksgiving. You barely even had a baby bump yet." She looked at Lilly, who was looking around curiously at the three new people in her house. "Oh my God, she's beautiful," Amy gasped. "I mean, I've seen about a thousand pictures, but still. She's gorgeous."

"Oh, thank you," Meredith said, catching Derek's proud smile out of the corner of her eye.

"She's definitely a Shepherd. Look at that hair," Amy said in awe.

Meredith smiled, gently combing her fingers through Lilly's dark head of hair, smoothed back by her headband. "Yeah, I think that was a given. It's already getting a little wavy. I'm waiting to wake up one day, and see curls."

"I think Kyle's curls came in when he was about six months old. It's pretty much an unchangeable code in the Shepherd DNA. So, expect to see curls around Christmas," Amy laughed.

"She's right. It's inevitable," Derek chuckled.

"My blonde haired, brown eyed DNA didn't stand a chance," Tom joked as he picked Kyle up.

Meredith laughed. "I didn't think mine would, either, so I'm glad Lilly at least looks a little bit like me," she said as they walked into the living room.

"I see a lot of you in her," Amy said. "She's so pretty."

"She really is," Tom agreed, sitting Kyle on his lap. "Say hi to your cousin, buddy."

Kyle looked at Lilly, and she stared back at him, equally interested. "Hi," Kyle waved with his small hand.

"You're the first Shepherd cousin to meet her, Kyle," Derek said.

"Mom said you guys are coming out for Thanksgiving?" Amy said.

"Yeah, we're ninety-nine percent sure, as long as Meredith can bank enough hours for three days off," Derek replied. "Then Lilly can meet the fourteen other East coast cousins she has. Maybe they'll get to meet Adam by then, too."

"That's the plan," Amy said, already wringing her hands together in nervous anticipation. "After what happened last time, we know better than to get our hopes up."

Derek wrapped his arm around Amy and gave her shoulders a small squeeze. "One step at a time," he promised her. "We're meeting with Dr. Halloran and Karen this afternoon. Karen is the hospital social worker. She deals with all of the in-hospital adoptions."

"Your adoption social worker flew out here, too, right?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah, Michelle. She's staying at a hotel near the hospital. I do a lot of pro bono work in my practice for kids in the foster care system, so we've known each other for years. She's been with us from the start."

"Well, the good thing is that you're already at an advantage. You've had the home study and passed all of your clearances, so all of the legal stuff is out of the way. And because you were all set to adopt earlier this year, it shows you're prepared," Derek pointed out.

"And this is already a special case. Because Adam has no next of kin, the hospital wants to find him a family while he's still a patient, rather than putting him in the system when he's released. I mean, obviously, there's still a lot of stuff that has to be worked out, but given the circumstances, the scale tips in your favor," Meredith added.

"And he's still doing well? Off all the machines and everything?" Tom asked.

"Yeah, he's doing great. He made it to six pounds, and he's in the regular nursery now. If it hadn't been for Karen and Dr. Halloran, he probably would have been discharged by now. But when your social worker got in contact with them, they held off on filing any paperwork. Honestly, they were both relieved. Placing newborns in temporary homes is always a risk. A lot of times, the parents decide it's too much work, and end up giving the babies back so they can be placed with new families. Then, they're just bounced around for God knows how long until a permanent family is found," Derek explained with a sigh, leaning over to kiss the top of Lilly's head, even more grateful for his daughter, and to know that she was his forever.

"We've been with him since the minute he was born. And we normally don't get attached to patients, but he's... it's almost like the universe was looking out for him, as corny as that sounds," Meredith said, smiling at Lilly who smiled in return.

"It's true," Derek agreed. "And he's got dark hair and blue eyes. That little guy is destined to be a Shepherd. He'd fit right in."

Amy and Tom smiled at that, almost as though it gave them hope. "That's a good sign," Amy said.

"Yeah, it is," Tom nodded.

"Legally, he doesn't have a name on his birth certificate, but we've been calling him Adam. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to—" Meredith said before Amy interrupted.

"We love it," Amy said. "We actually considered that name for Kyle, so Adam is perfect. If this works out, we can tell him his Aunt Meredith named him."

Meredith smiled at the thought. "Sounds good."

"You said Adam was a twin, right?" Tom asked.

"Yeah. Annie. She had a stroke, and went without oxygen. Her heart was too weak to recover from it. She, uh..." Meredith cleared her throat, hugging Lilly closer to her. "I was holding her when she died."

"Oh, God," Amy frowned.

"It was hard. She was doing well, so no one expected it. When Meredith and I have free time at work, we always spend time with him. He has no one else. So, we were both thrilled that you guys wanted to adopt him. And if it's meant to happen, it'll happen. You have every reason to be hopeful," Derek said. "So, how about we bring your bags in and give you some time to get settled, maybe get something to eat. Then we can get ready to go up to the hospital?" Derek suggested.

"You're sure you don't mind coming along?" Amy asked, shifting Kyle to her lap.

"No, not at all. Dr. Halloran delivered Lilly, and I've worked with Karen before on cases. I'm happy to go and offer any help I can," Derek replied, looking over at Meredith. "Unless you'd rather go, and I could stay here with Kyle and Lilly."

Meredith shook her head. "No, no. We'll be fine. You can ask Lilly, Kyle. I'm very entertaining."

"Hear that? You, Lilly, and Aunt Meredith are gonna have fun," Amy said, kissing her son's cheek.

Kyle smiled tentatively at her as he started to come out of his shell. "Do you have fruit snacks?"

"We have Scooby Doo _and_ Spiderman," Meredith said in her best attempt to get her nephew to approve of her.

"Do you like _Yo Gabba Gabba_?" Kyle asked.

"I... love it. Yeah," Meredith nodded, looking to the others for help.

"It's a cartoon. I have DVDs in his bag," Amy said.

Meredith smiled in relief. "Thank you."

...

"This has to be the world's creepiest show, Lilly," Meredith said as she burped Lilly on her lap after nursing her.

Kyle stood in front of the TV, hopped up on his peanut butter and jelly sandwich and cookies from lunch, dancing to a song from his cartoon. "Don't bite your friends!" he sang along, clapping his hands.

"How is this appropriate for toddlers?" Meredith murmured, picking up the _Yo Gabba Gabba_ DVD box and flipping it over. She smiled when she noticed Lilly was watching the TV, her big, blue eyes fascinated, too. "Really, Lillybug? It's bad enough you seem to prefer The Clash over Duran Duran. Now you like this, too?"

Lilly looked up at her and smiled wide, and Meredith pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Oh, you think that's funny, huh?" she laughed.

Kyle's cartoon ended, and he turned around. "Can I have some fruit snacks?" he asked.

"Yeah, I just need to change Lilly's diaper, then we'll go get some, okay?" Meredith compromised, laying Lilly down on the couch cushion.

"'Kay," Kyle agreed.

Meredith pointed to the pink bin full of diaper supplies next to the end table. "Can you get me that pink thing with the handle, Kyle?"

"Yeah," Kyle said, quickly running over to get it. He picked it up with two hands and walked back over to her, setting the bin at Meredith's feet. "Can I help?"

"Sure you can," Meredith said, pulling off Lilly's blue leggings. "Can you hand me the wipes in that green container?"

"Uh huh," Kyle said, lifting them from the bin and holding them out to her.

Meredith smiled. "Thank you," she said. She set them on her lap and popped open the lid, then peeled back the tabs of Lilly's diaper. As she was cleaning Lilly, Meredith noticed the expression on Kyle's face, and she couldn't help but laugh at how cute he looked, a lot like the pictures of Derek she'd seen when he was that age.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" Meredith asked.

"She don't got a penis," Kyle said, puzzled.

Meredith froze, biting her lip. She didn't even know he knew that word, much less how to explain the difference between boys and girls to her toddler-aged nephew. "Oh. Well..." she stalled. "You see, um, girls... they don't have those. Only boys have those. Girls have... different parts. And because Lilly is a girl and you're a boy, you're different from each other."

"Oh," Kyle replied simply.

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that he seemed placated by that answer. Before he could ask her any more questions about human anatomy, she diverted the conversation elsewhere. "Can you hand me a new diaper, please?"

Kyle reached into the bin and pulled out the diaper, then swapped that for the wipes. "Here ya go."

"Thank you," Meredith said, sliding the fresh diaper under Lilly's bottom. "Okay, now the powder?"

Kyle eagerly gave it to her, and Meredith smiled at his enthusiasm. "You're a very good helper, Kyle. Thank you."

"You're welcome," Kyle said politely, putting the powder back in its place when Meredith handed it back to him.

She fastened the diaper together, then shimmied the baby's pants back up her legs. "Okay, all finished," Meredith said, picking Lilly up off the couch, then grabbing the old diaper. "Let's go into the kitchen."

"Okay," Kyle said, running ahead of her.

"At least he's not shy anymore," Meredith told Lilly, who grabbed some of Meredith's hair and put it in her mouth.

"Can I have Spiderman?" Kyle asked as he hopped up onto one of the kitchen chairs.

"Sure," Meredith said, tossing Lilly's old diaper in the trash. She washed and dried her hands one at a time, switching Lilly from one arm to the other, then took two packs of fruit snacks from the pantry. After opening them, she handed one pack to Kyle. "Here you go."

"Thank you," Kyle said, pulling out a blue one.

Meredith popped a green one into her mouth and began chewing, contemplating on something to talk about with her nephew. "So, uh, do you know why you and your Mommy and Daddy are here?"

"'Cause I might be gettin' a baby Adam," Kyle answered excitedly.

"Yeah. That's pretty cool, you know," Meredith said.

"Can I meet him?" Kyle asked.

Meredith smiled. "Your Mom, Dad, and Uncle Derek just went to go talk to some people about that. If everything goes well, maybe you can meet him tomorrow."

"How big is he?"

"He's just a baby. He's even smaller than Lilly," Meredith said. Kyle's mouth formed an 'o' shape, and Meredith laughed. "Yeah, that little."

"Can he go trick or treating with me?" Kyle asked.

"I don't know yet," Meredith said, not wanting to give the little boy false hope. "Do you have a Halloween costume yet?"

"Uh huh," Kyle said as he chewed on a fruit snack. "I'm gonna be a pirate!"

"Really? That's awesome!" Meredith smiled.

Kyle pointed to Lilly. "Does she have a costume yet?"

"No, not yet. What do you think she should be for Halloween?" Meredith asked him.

"Uhhh..." Kyle pondered seriously before his eyes lit up. "Snow White 'cause she has dark hair like Snow White."

"You know what, that's a great idea. When Uncle Derek gets home, I'll run that by him," Meredith giggled, looking down at Lilly, who switched from sucking on Meredith's hair for her own thumb. "What do you think, Lilly? Wanna be Snow White?"

"My cousins make me watch that _a lot_," Kyle said dramatically.

"Lots of girl cousins that outvote you, huh?" Meredith said, walking over to the fridge.

"All the time," Kyle sighed, as though it was the biggest problem to ever plague him.

Meredith sat back down, stabbed a straw into each of their juice boxes, and handed one to him. "Well then, you need a little brother more than anyone, don't you?"

"Yup."

Meredith took a sip and smiled at him. "We all have our fingers crossed for you, buddy."

...

Over an hour passed without a call from Derek, and Meredith was getting anxious. She knew that the meeting was going to be tedious and take time, and that she was probably just being impatient, but still, she was itching to know how things were going. She set down her crayon next to the coloring book she and Kyle were sharing, and reached for her phone on the end table.

"I'll be right back, sweetie," she told Kyle, getting up off the floor. She smiled at Lilly, who was peacefully napping in her motion swing, then walked into the kitchen. Rather than calling Derek and risking disrupting anything, she settled on Cristina instead. After dialing, she held the phone to her ear, leaning against the counter while she waited for an answer.

On the third ring, Cristina picked up. "Hey," she said.

"Hey," Meredith returned. "You're still at work, right?"

"Yeah, I just scrubbed out. Teddy let me fix a coronary artery aneurysm by myself. You should've been there, Mer. I was flawless," Cristina boasted.

Meredith smiled, amused by her unveiled arrogance. "I'm sure you were," she said. "Anyway, I have a favor to ask. Do you have a minute?"

"What?" Cristina asked.

"I need you to walk by the meeting they're having in conference room B, and see if you can find out what's going on," Meredith explained, glancing into the living room to make sure Lilly and Kyle were okay.

"Oh, for the adoption thing?"

"Yeah."

"So, you want me to be your spy?" Cristina assumed.

"Yes, but you know, casually. Just... mosey by the window and sneak a peek," Meredith said.

"Did you just say mosey?" Cristina asked, the teasing evident in her tone.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Mosey. Saunter. Whatever. Just be subtle about it."

"Fine. But can I at least stop at the vending machine first? I haven't eaten since seven this morning."

"Fine."

"Are you being the good aunt-slash-babysitter while they're here?" Cristina asked.

"Yeah. Lilly is sleeping, and Kyle's coloring, so I figured while the house was quiet, I'd call you," Meredith said, picking up one of Charlie's toys and tossing it into his toy basket.

"Salt and vinegar chips or a pack of Oreos?" Cristina said after she reached the vending machine.

"Chips," Meredith answered.

Cristina put two quarters in the slot, and Meredith could hear as the chips fell into the delivery bin. As soon as Cristina reached in and took them, she opened the bag, and popped one into her mouth. "Good choice," she said as she chewed. "Conference room B, you said?"

"Yeah."

"Approaching the hallway," Cristina said in a hushed tone.

Meredith laughed. "Okay, you don't need to mock me and give me a play by play. Just walk by the window and tell me what you see."

Cristina put the phone in her pocket to avoid suspicion in case Derek or someone else in the room saw her, then glanced into the window, gauging whatever she could between the slats of the blinds. When she made it to the other side, she put the phone to her ear again. "Okay, six of them are sitting in there. Derek, whatever his sister's name is, the guy I'm assuming is her husband, Seattle Grace's social worker whose name I can't remember, Halloran, and some blond woman I don't know."

"Yeah, that's Amy and Tom's adoption social worker," Meredith said. "Could you tell what they were doing?"

Cristina shrugged. "I don't know. Just talking, I think. There were a bunch of papers spread out on the table."

"Well, did they look happy? Or was it all doom and gloom in there?" Meredith asked.

"It took me five seconds to walk past the window. How am I supposed to decipher any of that in five seconds?" Cristina retorted, crunching on another chip.

"Walk by again, then," Meredith said.

"Yeah, because that won't look stalkery," Cristina said sarcastically.

"Come on. Be a friend. Do it for me," Meredith said, trying not to sound like she was begging.

"Fine, but you owe me," Cristina groaned.

"Fine."

Cristina walked back the opposite way, peeking into the window again, slower this time. After passing by, she took the phone from her pocket again. "Okay, Derek said something and smiled, then they all laughed. How's that?"

"Oh, that's good!" Meredith said happily. "Maybe that means things are going their way."

"Yeah, McDreamy can move mountains with that smile," Cristina said, rolling her eyes. "Seriously, though. It doesn't look like doom and gloom to me."

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. That's good."

"So, can I stop being Harriet the Spy now? Because it would be borderline creepy if I walked by a third time," Cristina said.

"No, you did good," Meredith said, smiling when she saw that Lilly was stretching her tiny limbs as she woke up from her nap. "Lilly's awake. I have to go. Thank you for gently stalking. I appreciate it."

"Just so you know, if someone saw me doing that, I'm blaming you," Cristina said.

"You do that."

...

Just as Meredith was about to call Derek out of desperation after suffering through a third episode of _Yo Gabba Gabba_, he came in the front door with a box of pizza. "Hey," he called out, walking into the living room.

Meredith turned around, smiling in relief. "Hey," she returned. "And you have pizza, which means I don't have to yell at you."

"Yell at me?" Derek asked. He set the pizza down on the table, and kissed Lilly's cheek. "Hey, Lillybug."

"You've been gone for three hours," Meredith said, handing Lilly to Derek.

Derek hugged Lilly to him and smiled. "There were about a hundred points on the agenda. Getting through it took a lot of time."

"So, how'd it go?" Meredith asked.

"You mean Cristina didn't tell you?" Derek asked, a knowing smirk plastered on his face.

Meredith bit her lip. She was busted, and she knew it. "You saw her, huh?"

"The first time, I didn't think much of it. But the second time she strolled by? Yeah, I kinda figured you were involved," Derek chuckled.

"Fine. I called her. But that's only because I was getting worried," Meredith defended.

"It actually went well. Because they went through all of this a year ago, a lot of the paperwork is already verified. They have to go back tomorrow for separate and joint interviews. So far, so good. I told them to go out to dinner, so they could have some time to themselves, so I brought home a pizza for me, you, and Kyle," Derek said.

Kyle turned around from his simultaneous TV watching and puzzle doing, eyes wide in excitement. "Pizza?"

"Yep. Why don't we go into the kitchen and eat it before it gets cold," Derek said.

"Okay. But I gotta go potty first," Kyle said, dropping his puzzle piece before running toward the stairs.

"So, what did you guys do today?" Derek asked.

"Well, I gave a condensed, G-rated version of why boys and girls are different. That was fun," Meredith said, amused.

"What?"

"I was changing Lilly's diaper, and he asked where her penis was," Meredith said as she began putting Kyle's crayons back in the box.

"Seriously? What did you tell him?"

"Why would I make that up? Yes, seriously," Meredith laughed. "I just kept it simple. Boys have them; girls don't. Then he wanted fruit snacks, so we were in the clear."

Derek grinned at Lilly, who reached her hand toward his face as she stretched. "Mommy is very good in a crisis, Lilly."

"Yeah, well, at least we're better prepared for when Lilly asks us about sex one day," Meredith said, grabbing the pizza off the table.

Derek got up off the couch and followed her into the kitchen. "By 'us' you mean you, right?"

"What? Why just me?" Meredith asked. She put the pizza down on the counter, then walked toward the cabinet for plates. "Just because I have a vagina and you don't means I'm the go-to parent for that stuff?"

"Well... yes," Derek said. "She's not gonna want to ask her dad about that. Bras and periods and... I don't even want to think about it." He looked at Lilly. "Just stay little forever, okay?"

Meredith smiled, setting the plates down on the table, then kissing his cheek. "Fine," she agreed. "But if future, fictitious baby number two is a boy, then you have to handle it."

"Deal."

"Deal," Meredith echoed, just as Kyle ran into the kitchen.

"Hey, buddy. Did you wash your hands?" Derek asked.

Kyle held out his palms proudly. "Uh huh," he nodded, before climbing into a kitchen chair.

"Good job," he praised, shifting Lilly to his other arm. "So, did you have fun with Aunt Meredith and Lilly this afternoon?"

"We colored and did puzzles and watched _Yo Gabba Gabba_," Kyle said as Meredith put a slice of cut up pizza on the little boy's dish.

"_A lot_ of _Yo Gabba Gabba_," Meredith amended, getting herself a slice of pineapple and plain for Derek. She sat down in the chair next to him. "I'll be fighting nightmares for a week," she murmured.

"What do you mean?" Derek asked.

"There's a song about not biting your friends. And there's this weird character that just walks around and cries. He looks like a giant T-A-M-P-O-N," Meredith explained, spelling out the word so she wouldn't have to explain that to Kyle, too.

Derek nearly choked on his pizza slice, and Meredith nodded. "Right? And this is a kids' show."

"Lilly was watchin' it with me," Kyle said, a bite of pizza in his mouth.

"You were watching it too, Princess?" Derek asked Lilly, who smiled up at him.

"Yep, she was. She loved it," Meredith said, reaching for Kyle's empty sippy cup so she could refill it for him. "Actually, she enjoyed it so much that she had to fight to keep her eyes open, so she got a shorter nap than usual."

Derek raised his eyebrows at her. "Really?"

"Mhm," Meredith hummed.

"So that means..."

"Sex," Meredith mouthed, standing behind Kyle as she handed him his cup back.

"Looks like we'll be adding that show to our Tivo, then," Derek joked, adjusting Lilly so she sat resting on his free arm. He kissed the top of her head. "If it means more Mommy and Daddy time, I guess we can overlook the sad T-A-M-P-O-N, although I'm kind of convinced Mommy is making that up..."

"I am not," Meredith said, dropping her pizza onto her plate. She took Derek's phone from his pocket, and after a quick Wikipedia search, she showed him the screen. "See? Look. Creepy, giant T-A-M-P-O-N man. Actually, his name is Gooble, but I like my name for him better."

Derek's eyebrows knitted together in equal parts disturbance and amusement, and he laughed. "Yikes. That is creepy."

"Gooble _is_ kinda weird, Uncle Derek," Kyle chimed in, licking some pizza sauce off of his finger.

Meredith smiled at Derek in satisfaction. "Told you."

...

**Yes, Gooble actually exists, and he's hilariously creepy. Google image him! ;)**


	125. One Step Closer

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

**So sorry for the delay between updates. Life has been busy, so fic writing has taken a back seat. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter! :)  
**

Meredith sat at the desk in Derek's office, scrolling through a Halloween costume website. So far, there weren't any front runners, and with October 31st only three weeks away, the deadline was fast approaching. "How about Snow White?" she said.

Derek looked at her from his spot as he lay on the couch, Lilly sitting on his stomach, supported by his arms holding her up. "As in the princess?"

"Kyle suggested it yesterday. I told him I'd run it by you," Meredith said.

"Hey, I have no problem with it. I just never pegged you as the Disney princess kind of girl," Derek smirked. "You're more of a blood and gore type."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "I'm a surgeon. Blood and gore are way cooler than fairy wands and glitter," she said. "No offense, Lilly. If you turn out to be a princessy kind of kid, I'll get on board. I promise."

"Wanna be Snow White, Lillybug?" Derek asked his daughter. Lilly scrunched her nose at him and laughed as though she were giving her opinion, and he chuckled. "Okay, no princesses, then."

Meredith clicked on the next page of the website, and smiled when the first costume displayed caught her eye. "Got it!" she all but cheered, selecting the picture to enlarge it.

"What?"

"Baby surgeon," Meredith said, turning the laptop toward him. "Comes with blue scrubs, a scrub cap, white coat, and a mini stethoscope."

Derek grinned, swinging his legs off the couch and into a sitting position so he could look at it more closely. "That's adorable," he said. "We could even clip your ID badge to the pocket."

"I went through eight pages on this website, and we're both literally sitting in the outfit," Meredith laughed. "I think Lilly would make a very pretty, little surgeon. What do you say, Lilly? Should we order it?"

Lilly smiled at Meredith from her place on Derek's lap, and Meredith smiled back at her. "That looks like approval to me," she said. "Should we go with extra small?"

"What's the age on it?" Derek asked.

"Three to six months, but the site says all of the costumes run big," Meredith read off the page. "She'll be almost five months by the end of October, but she's tiny, so she'd probably be swimming in a small."

"I say extra small, then," Derek agreed.

"Okay," Meredith said, reaching for her bag next to Derek's desk to retrieve her wallet. She pulled out her credit card, then typed the information into the site. "Okay, one pair of adorably expensive baby scrubs should be arriving within a week."

"They'll make comfy pajamas, so at least she can wear them again," Derek said.

"Oh, good point," Meredith smiled, tucking her credit card back into the slot after printing the order confirmation.

Derek sniffed the air around him and scrunched his nose, then peeked into the back of Lilly's diaper. "Okay, the scrubs you can wear again. But this diaper needs to come off."

"There's diapers in her bag," Meredith said, pointing to Lilly's purple travel bag sitting on the couch.

"I'm pretty sure it's your turn," Derek said as he slid the bag toward himself. "I changed the middle of the night poop."

"That's because I had to get up at six and you didn't," Meredith countered.

Derek held Lilly in one arm, rolling out her changing pad with the other. "Rock, paper, scissors," he challenged.

"What? No."

"Why not?" he asked.

"Because every freaking time we do that, I lose," Meredith said, slipping her feet back into her shoes.

Derek looked at her and smirked, gently laying Lilly on the couch. "Hmm, I know."

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him playfully as she got up out of Derek's comfy swivel chair behind his desk. "Mean."

Just as Meredith walked around the desk to change Lilly, there was a knock at Derek's office door. Mark poked his head in and waved. "Am I interrupting?"

"No, just in time," Derek said, pulling Lilly's pants off her legs.

"For what?" Mark asked.

Meredith smiled, catching onto Derek's plan in seconds. She pulled a diaper from Lilly's bag, and handed it to him. "Diaper change."

"What? Why me?" Mark asked.

"Right place, right time," Derek said. He smiled at Lilly, then kissed her forehead. "Don't worry, Princess. You're in good hands. Plus, he needs the practice."

"Hmm, fine," Mark agreed, taking Derek's spot on the couch after Derek got up. He set the fresh diaper on his lap, and peeled back the adhesive tabs on the old one.

Meredith handed him the pack of diaper wipes. "How's that going? Did you and Bridget make a baby yet?"

"It's a work in progress," Mark said, holding Lilly's legs up while he cleaned her. "Oh, God. How can such a bad smell come from someone this cute?" he said, burying his nose into his shoulder.

"That's my girl," Derek said proudly before taking a sip from his coffee cup. "So, why'd you come up here?"

"Not to do this. No offense, Lilly," Mark said. "I was just wondering if Amy and Tom had any news yet."

"They're down there now with the social worker again. Karen suggested that Kyle come along, so he feels included, too. I think they actually got to meet with Adam for a few minutes today."

"Sounds like they have a pretty good chance then, right?" Mark said, sliding the fresh diaper under Lilly's bottom.

"Seems like it's going their way. And the good thing is that Adam is technically ready to be discharged. He's at a healthy weight, and finishes all of his feedings. Dr. Halloran is just holding off because the adoption thing came up," Derek said.

Meredith smiled, watching as Mark gently sprinkled Lilly with some powder. "We still don't know how long it'll take, though. The standard wait for the paperwork to be processed is six weeks, maybe longer. But we're hoping that because they've already passed their clearances, they'll be given temporary custody while they wait for the hearing. Otherwise, he'd either have to stay here or be put in a temporary home. He's already been through more crap in the few weeks that he's been born than most people go through in a lifetime. He deserves to be with Amy and Tom."

"Everything's gonna work out. There's a reason he was born here, right?" Mark said, fastening the tabs on Lilly's diaper.

"Mark Sloan has an optimistic side?" Meredith said.

"How can you not be optimistic when you look at this face?" Mark pointed out, picking Lilly up off the couch after he shimmied her pants back on. He kissed her cheek, and Lilly smiled at him, making one of her happy cooing sounds. "You're gonna be a heart breaker one day, you know that, kid?"

"And you are a damn good diaper changer," Meredith complimented him, taking the dirty diaper and tossing it in the trash.

"I've changed her diapers before."

"Not number twos. I'm impressed," Derek said.

"See? I'm competent father material," Mark said, sitting Lilly on his lap. "So, what're you both doing here? I thought you worked opposite schedules."

"I had to work a ten hour from seven to five, and Derek got paged in for an emergency craniotomy at twelve. I scrubbed out, Derek handed me Lilly, then he scrubbed in. Now we're both just running out the clock, hoping neither of us gets paged for anything, so we can make it out of here on time," Meredith explained.

"In the ye olde days before parenthood, I would've walked in on you two running out the clock by having sex on this couch," Mark said with a grin.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yeah, it's kinda frowned upon to do that with your baby in the same room. Instead, we ordered Lilly's Halloween costume."

"Oh, yeah? What did you decide on?" Mark asked.

Derek turned the laptop around on the table to show him. "Baby surgeon. She's gonna look adorable."

"Third generation Dr. Grey, huh?" Mark asked Lilly, who just yawned and put her thumb in her mouth. "Are you gonna be a neurosurgeon like your parents, or part of Uncle Mark's plastics posse when you grow up?"

"Plastics posse?" Meredith echoed.

"She's a neurosurgeon in the making. One day, we spent an hour watching a show on new advances in neurological microsurgery. She was hooked. Literally didn't look away from the TV once," Derek boasted.

"It's true. We were going to give her a bath, but she was so engrossed that we waited until it was over," Meredith added.

"I'm sure she'd be just as intrigued if I showed her a face transplant," Mark said.

"That may be true, but she's still our little neurosurgeon," Derek upheld, smiling at his daughter.

"We'll see," Mark said.

Derek laughed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Mer and I made her, so challenge accepted."

There was another knock at the door, and Amy opened it a crack. "Hey, have a minute?" she asked.

"Yeah, of course. Come on in," Derek said. "How's it going?"

"Good, so far," Tom said, setting Kyle on his feet.

"Hey, little man. Long time, no see," Mark said, giving Kyle a high five.

Kyle hopped up onto the couch next to Mark. "Hi, Uncle Mark," the little boy said, then waved to Lilly, who smiled at him.

"Sit down wherever. There's my chair, or the couch. Or you can sit on the table. I didn't pay for it, so until they give me a decent sized office, I don't care," Derek joked, leaning against his desk next to Meredith.

"My office is right next door. I proposed knocking the adjoining wall down, so we could share one, big mega-office, but Derek declined. Apparently, it would be weird if I was at my desk while those two were busy having S-E-X on this fancy pull out couch," Mark said, patting the cushion.

Meredith blushed, burying her face into Derek's shoulder. "Really, Mark?"

"At least he spelled the word out," Derek sighed.

"You got to see Adam, right?" Meredith said in an attempt to change the subject.

"We did. He's so perfect. And you guys were right; he looks like a Shepherd," Amy said, putting her hand over her heart. "We were with him for ten minutes, and we're already in love. If this doesn't work out..."

Derek waved his hand in dismissal. "Don't think like that. Positivity is a powerful thing."

"When I was trying to get pregnant, Derek used to tell me the same thing," Meredith said.

Derek held up Lilly's framed newborn photo sitting on his desk. "Lots of positivity and lots of you know what, and nine months later, six pounds, seven ounces of the most beautiful baby girl I've ever seen."

"It's annoying, and very Hallmark, but optimism works," Meredith agreed, looking at her daughter, who laughed every time Kyle made a funny face at her.

"Did they say anything about being granted temporary custody back in New York? They should at least consider the fact that you're putting your lives on hold to be here," Mark pointed out.

"That's the hope. Dr. Halloran actually did her fellowship at Mount Sinai in New York before moving here permanently, so she's seeing if she can pull some strings to have him stay there for a few weeks in case we're not granted temporary custody, just so he wouldn't be put in a foster home. She seems to think there's a good chance because he's still a newborn," Tom said.

"Newborns don't bode well in foster homes, especially ones that were preemies. You need to be even more vigilant, because of possible apnea and issues with feedings. I don't think that pertains to Adam, but social services has to be sure that whoever is responsible for the care is qualified," Amy explained.

Derek nodded in support. "Well, you're both parents already. And Ames, you're a pediatrician. Social services couldn't find anyone more qualified if they tried."

"If all goes as planned, when would he be yours permanently?" Mark asked, wiping some drool off Lilly's chin with the sleeve of his white coat.

"Karen and Michelle said the goal is between Thanksgiving and Christmas. It would be much longer, except we've been through all this before," Amy answered.

"I know that seems like a long way off, but it'll go by quick. And whether he's with you guys, here, or at Sinai, he'll be well taken care of," Derek said, noticing how stressed his sister looked. "I think we could all use a night to take our mind off everything and have some fun. Mark and I finished building the pizza oven outback last weekend. How about we put it to use before it gets too cold outside?"

"Sounds like fun," Mark said, taking hold of Lilly's feet. "Your Aunt Bridget bought you a pair of Elmo slippers that she's been dying to give you. But I probably wasn't supposed to tell you that, so act surprised when she gives them to you."

Meredith laughed. "Pretty soon, Lilly is going to need a second bedroom for all of the stuff Aunt Bridget buys her."

"She knows how much Lilly loves Elmo. She couldn't help herself," Mark grinned.

"We appreciate it. And so will Lilly's warm feet. Thank you," Meredith said. "Derek and I will be done work in about an hour, so we can stop at the store on the way home." She peeled a Post-It off the stack on Derek's desk. "What kind of toppings does everyone like?"

"Are you guys sure? We know we're staying at your house, but we don't want you to feel obligated to do this. You already watched Kyle for us last night," Amy said.

"Yeah, and he helped us do the dishes and give Lilly a bath. If you'd let us keep him, we would," Derek teased. "We love having you guys here. Now, pick some toppings."

"I like pineapple!" Kyle chimed in.

"You do? Since when?" Tom asked.

"Aunt Meredith likes it," Kyle shrugged.

"We got it last night, and he asked to try some. Kyle's a fan now," Meredith said proudly. "And one day, I'll convert Lilly to pineapple, too."

"Pineapple on pizza sounds terrible," Mark said.

"Don't knock it until you've tried it," Meredith said, shaking her head.

"That's the same thing she told me about her pregnancy cravings, and I still have no intention of eating apples and ranch dressing," Derek laughed.

"Ugh, you actually ate that?" Mark asked, visibly cringing at the thought.

Meredith smirked, writing pineapple on the Post-It note. "I was pregnant at the time. And for the record? It's delicious."

...

It was warmer than a normal October night in Seattle with a faint breeze in the air as the fall settled in, and the sun was slowly setting beyond the backyard. Derek, Mark, and Tom stood outback, manning the pizza oven, Kyle eagerly helping. Meredith opened sliding glass door that led to the back porch, wrapping the blanket she had around Lilly a little more snugly to keep her warm.

"Hey," she said. "Smells good out here."

Derek smiled when he saw her and Lilly, and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "Good," he said, kissing her temple. "First time using it, and I'm already impressed."

"Hmm, that's because you did a good job building it," Meredith complimented.

"Hey, I helped," Mark reminded them before downing the rest of his beer.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Yes, and you saved us from having to pay professionals, so we're grateful," she giggled.

"That's all I'm saying," Mark said. "I'm gonna go get another beer. Anyone want one?"

"No, I'm good," Derek said.

"I'll come with you," Tom said, picking Kyle up and following Mark back into the house.

Once they were alone, Meredith leaned into Derek, taking in the quiet. "Lilly loves her new slippers," she said, lifting up the blanket to show Derek.

Derek grinned at how cute they looked on his daughter's tiny feet. "I'm pretty sure Lilly owns enough Elmo merchandise to open a museum," he joked.

"Bridget has baby fever. Until she has one of her own, Lilly will be reaping the benefits," Meredith said. "It's funny. Bridget's talking about all the baby making and everything that comes with it, and she's reminding me of how I was back when we were trying. Excited and hopeful and nervous. They've only been trying for a couple months, though. I told her to just relax, and it'll happen."

"And you say I'm the corny optimist," Derek teased her. "But you're right. Soon enough, they'll get the plus sign."

"I already lent her all of our conception books. I highlighted all of the best sex positions, too. You know, legs on the shoulders and that spoony thing."

"You talked about all of this with my little sister in the room, too?" Derek guessed.

"She was doling out sex tips of her own," Meredith said. "Good stuff, too. Stuff I plan on using on you the next chance I get."

Derek winced as he opened the door to the pizza oven to check on their food. "Please don't share those details with me," he begged. "I mean, by all means, use it in bed. Just don't tell me from where and whom you learned it."

"Deal."

"Are you thinking about making another baby?" Derek asked.

"Wow. Didn't expect that question. But no; a little more time has to pass before I can build up the energy to push another baby out of my body. Not yet," Meredith laughed. "Why? Are you?"

"No. One perfect baby is enough for right now," Derek agreed.

Meredith smiled, rocking her hips from side to side because she knew Lilly liked the motion. "Adam is pretty perfect, too. Is it bad that I already think of him as my nephew?"

"So do I."

Just as Meredith was about to raise her head to kiss him, her pager went off in her pocket, and she quickly reached in for it. She frowned in worry when she read the message. "Damn it. 911 for Adam."

"What? What happened?" Derek asked, taking Lilly from her so she could call the hospital.

Meredith sighed as she dialed and waited for someone to pick up. "I don't know," she said. As soon as the nurse on the phone answered, Meredith jumped right in. "Hi, this is Dr. Grey calling. I was just paged 911 for Adam Mackley. Any idea on what happened?"

Derek could hear the murmur of the nurse's voice on the other end, and saw Meredith chewing on her lip nervously as she was given the information. "He was taken off the apnea monitor a week ago, and hasn't had any problems," she said.

When the nurse told Meredith everything she could, Meredith ended the call, and put her phone back in her pocket. "I need to go in. Apparently, Adam's been fussy all night, and might have some respiratory distress. It's off and on, but if they think it's serious enough to page me, I don't want to risk holding off until morning."

"We'll be fine. Go make sure he's okay," Derek encouraged calmly.

Meredith took Lilly again and hugged her. "I love you, peanut. I promise, we'll hang out all weekend. I'm not leaving your side," she said, kissing the top of her head as she tried to suppress her mommy guilt. But she knew that Adam needed her, and that Lilly would be fine for a few hours.

"What should we tell Amy and Tom?" Derek asked, sliding open the back door.

Meredith stepped into the house and sighed, peeking into the living room. "Let's not worry them until we have to. I'll go in and see what's wrong, and I'll call you."

"Okay," Derek agreed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and giving her a small squeeze. "I'm sure it's something minor, and you'll be back in no time," he said. "I'll keep the pizza warm for you."

Meredith smiled slightly, handing Lilly to Derek so she could get going, and kissing them both. "Thank you."


	126. A Bit of Hope

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

**Thank you as always for your patience! Enjoy!  
**

Meredith arrived at the hospital to check on Adam within the hour, and she wasted no time on running every test she could think of shortly thereafter. So far, everything seemed normal. He wasn't cyanotic, had no apparent heart condition, and his breathing was regular. But to rule out any possible problems, Meredith sent him down to radiology for a CT. She stood outside the booth and waited until he was finished, so she could look over the scans.

She leaned her head against the wall and sighed. Before she was a parent, getting paged back in after completing a full shift wasn't a big deal. But since Lilly was born, switching back into doctor mode was a huge sacrifice, and if she'd been paged in for any other patient, she would have passed the page along to someone else. This was different, though. Adam already felt like her nephew, and right now, he needed her.

"Dr. Grey, scans are coming up now," the tech, Paul, said from the booth.

"Okay," Meredith said, stepping back inside and dropping into a chair in front of the monitor. Scans of Adam's lungs flashed up onto the screen, first from one angle, then another, and another, and another. Meredith examined each one closely, looking for even the slightest indication that something was wrong, but found nothing. "These look normal to me, but I'm going to page respiratory to make sure."

"Alright, I'll get him out of there," Paul said.

"Thank you."

While the tech was getting Adam from the CT, Meredith made a quick phone call to Derek to keep him posted. She pressed number one on speed dial, and the phone rang only once before he answered.

"Hey," Derek said from the other end. "Any news?"

"He just had a CT of his lungs. Everything checks out normal. If respiratory gives him the all clear, I have to start looking for other causes," Meredith said. "Where are you?"

"In bed with Lilly. She fell asleep on my chest after I gave her a bottle and burped her," Derek said.

Meredith smiled at the thought, wanting nothing more than to be there, curled up next to both of them. "Okay, good," she said. "Did Amy and Tom seem suspicious after I left?"

"No, they didn't say anything," Derek assured her. "So, do you think you'll make it home tonight?"

"I don't know. He's stable right now. If I think it's safe, I can hold off on doing any tests until morning," Meredith said, checking her watch before yawning. "I'm already exhausted."

"If you're too tired to drive, I can come get you."

"I might hold you to that," Meredith managed to laugh. "Okay, well, I'll keep you updated if I find anything out. Give Lilly a kiss for me."

Derek leaned down and pressed a few kisses to the top of Lilly's head. "From you to Lilly," he said.

"Thank you," Meredith smiled. "Love you."

"I love you, too. Call me whenever," Derek said.

"Okay, I will. Bye."

"Bye."

Meredith hung up the phone and dropped it into the pocket of her white coat, the rounded the corner to meet Adam. When she saw that the tech was about to lay him in an incubator to transport him, Meredith reached her arms out. "That's okay. I'll hold him."

"Okay," he nodded, passing Adam into her arms. "Would you like me to page respiratory for you?"

"That would be great; thank you," Meredith said. She held Adam close to her chest and walked toward the elevator. "I'm gonna figure this out, I promise," she told the baby, who gripped onto her scrub top with his small hand.

She pushed the elevator button, and the doors opened almost immediately, courtesy of the nearly empty hospital traffic at night. Once the doors reopened on the OB floor, she headed toward the nursery. She saw his empty isolette with the blue blanket and small, beige teddy bear she'd bought for him, and sat down in the nearby rocking chair.

"Getting sleepy?" Meredith asked him, noticing how his eyelids were getting heavier every time he blinked. "That's okay. Try to sleep."

One of the night nurses, Megan, walked in holding a newborn, and gently placed her back in her isolette, smiling at the little girl, then at Meredith. "How's he doing?"

Meredith looked up. "Oh. I'm not sure yet. He just got a CT," she said. "Were you here when... whatever happened, happened?"

"Yeah, he was doing fine. I fed him his usual bottle, and he fell asleep. An hour later, he woke up screaming. His face was bright red, then he started with the coughing and the hiccups, and wouldn't calm down. It was hard to get clear lung sounds with the stethoscope. He was so wheezy from crying," Megan explained. "Your name's been on his chart since he was born, and we know you spend a lot of time with him, so you seemed like the logical one to page."

"Has he ever gotten fussy after his feedings before?" Meredith asked.

"Occasionally, but that's pretty typical of newborns," Megan said.

"Okay," Meredith said, anxious to get some answers from respiratory. She checked her watch, and saw that it was a quarter after nine, which wasn't exactly late, but with her own baby at home, every minute spent here was time away from where she really wanted to be.

There was a short knock at the nursery entrance, and Cristina walked in, surprised to see Meredith sitting there. "Wait, these are Adam's scans?" she asked, holding them up.

"I didn't know you were on call tonight," Meredith said in relief, knowing that if there was one cardio resident she could trust to give her accurate information, it was Cristina.

"Yeah. Are you?" Cristina asked.

Meredith shook her head. "No, I got paged in for Adam. Is he okay?"

"Scans are clear. His lungs are fine," Cristina replied. "Does Derek's sister know why you're here?"

"No, Derek and I didn't want to scare them if it was something minor, but now it just means there's something else wrong with him," Meredith said, glancing at an empty bottle sitting on the counter top. The more she put the puzzle pieces together, the more things started to make sense. "You know what? I don't think it's a respiratory thing."

"What?" Cristina asked, confused.

"I think he has acid reflux. I want to schedule an upper GI X-ray tomorrow, which means he can't eat for the next twelve hours," Meredith said, glancing at her watch again. "When was his last feeding?"

"He was finished around 7:30," Megan answered.

"Okay. Maybe Robbins can do it tomorrow morning," Meredith said.

"I'll call down to the nurses' station on the surgical floor, and make sure she's available," Megan said as she finished re-swaddling a nearby infant.

"Thank you," Meredith said.

"Are you staying here all night?" Cristina asked.

Meredith sighed, resting her head on the back of the rocking chair. "Wasn't planning on it, but I don't want to leave him here alone, especially if he gets fussy again."

Cristina gestured for Meredith to get up so she could take her seat. "I have to be here anyway. I'll sit here."

"You'd really sit in the hospital nursery holding a baby, surrounded by other babies?" Meredith asked in disbelief.

"I'll basically be taking a glorified nap, disguised as patient monitoring. If I'm in here, at least I won't get paged down to the pit to deal with the late night idiocies," Cristina shrugged.

Meredith smiled, impressed by her friend's willingness to help, and she decided to press her luck. "Will you assist Robbins with his X-ray tomorrow, too?"

Cristina exhaled slowly as she dropped down into the rocking chair. "Only if nothing better comes along. Why? Won't you be here?"

"I'm not scheduled to come in until nine, and in case I can't get here before then, I want to at least know he's with people I know," Meredith said, gently passing Adam over to her.

"Fine. I'll do it. But you owe me," Cristina compromised, making a face when Adam blew a bubble with his mouth. "Eww, he's spitting."

Meredith couldn't help but laugh as she wiped the minuscule amount of drool off Adam's lip with her finger. "It's probably a good thing you don't have kids. If you think spit is gross, try changing a dirty diaper in the middle of the night with your phone tucked under your chin for light."

"You're the one that purposefully got herself knocked up," Cristina pointed out.

"Yes, I did. And now, I'm gonna go home, and see my beautiful, perfect baby, and try to get some sleep before I have to come back here in eleven hours," Meredith said, draping Adam's blanket over his back to keep him warm. "You sure you don't mind staying here with him?"

"No, I'm good," Cristina yawned.

"And remember, he can't eat until he has the test," Meredith said.

Cristina made sure Adam was settled on her chest before waving Meredith out of the room. "Got it. Now go."

"Thank you," Meredith said. She quietly pulled open the door to the nursery, and walked as quickly as she could back to the elevator before Cristina had the chance to change her mind.

...

When Meredith finally made it back home, she barely had enough energy to change into some sweats and crawl into bed. Derek lay sleeping with his nose pressed to Lilly's cheek, and Meredith smiled, leaning down to kiss both of them.

Derek stirred as he woke up, and he propped his head up on his hand, careful not to wake Lilly. "Did you just get in?"

"Yeah," Meredith nodded. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"No, it's fine. So, what's going on? Is Adam okay?" Derek asked.

"Nothing's wrong with his lungs. I scheduled a GI for him tomorrow morning with Robbins," Meredith said.

Derek frowned. "A GI? You think he might have a hiatal hernia or something?"

"I don't know yet. I'm hoping it's just acid reflux, and there's a quick fix that doesn't involve surgery."

"Which would delay the adoption process," Derek finished.

"Yeah," Meredith sighed, rubbing her finger over Lilly's arm. "We kind of have to tell Amy and Tom."

"I know. We'll tell them in the morning. Maybe they can come up to see him afterward. They don't need to be at the airport until six, so at least they'll be able to spend some time with him," Derek said, leaning over to hug her.

"Sucks that they have to leave," Meredith said. She hugged him back, resting her chin on his shoulder. "I just keep thinking what if it were Lilly. I don't know what I'd do if I had to leave her here, knowing she's sick, and fly across the country without her."

"I know. But we'll be here. We'll take care of him," he said.

Lilly made a soft sighing sound as she woke up, and they both looked down when they heard her. She smiled up at them sleepily as she stretched her little arms and legs. Meredith knew she should just let her fall back to sleep, but she couldn't help but pick her up. "Even when we accidentally wake you up, you're in a good mood."

"She shares that shiny, happy, just-woke-up demeanor with me," Derek grinned, kissing the top of Lilly's head.

Meredith laughed. "Well, she definitely didn't get it from me."

"Maybe I'll bring her up to the hospital tomorrow. We can all have lunch together in the cafeteria. At the very least, it'll take their minds off Adam for a while," Derek said.

"That sounds good," Meredith yawned, watching as Lilly nuzzled her face into her chest. "Are you hungry, peanut?"

Derek took Lilly while Meredith got situated, propping a pillow behind her back so she could nurse. "Do you have any surgeries scheduled for tomorrow?"

"A brain biopsy, and a shunt placement with Nelson, but those are quick. And if something happens with Adam, he'll let me scrub out. You know, he said I'm the best neuro resident he's ever worked with," Meredith said.

"He's right."

Meredith smirked as he handed Lilly back to her. "Of course you're gonna say that. I give you sex."

"Sex or not, it's just the truth," Derek upheld, wrapping his arm around her. "Although, the sex is certainly a perk."

Meredith rested her head on his shoulder. "Yes it is."

...

It was 9:00 the next morning when Arizona and Cristina took Adam back for his GI X-ray. Meredith sat in her scrubs in the waiting room, Lilly on her lap, sitting next to Derek. Amy, Tom, and Kyle sat on the other side of the small table, nerves running high as they all waited for Cristina to come out with an update, eager for any news.

"It usually takes about twenty minutes, so they should be coming out soon," Meredith said. When she and Derek had told them about Kyle this morning, they'd taken the news well; but like any other parents, even potential ones, they were scared, so the least Meredith could do was try to offer some relief.

"He couldn't be in better hands. Dr. Robbins is one of the best peds. surgeons in the country," Derek added.

"Not that we think he'll need surgery. But if he does, she's the one you want," Meredith said, turning Lilly around so she could look over her shoulder to watch the hustle and bustle of the hospital to keep her entertained.

"Hi, pretty girl," came Arizona's voice behind them as she waved at Lilly.

They all straightened in their seats as they waited for whatever news she had to give. Derek turned around in his chair and smiled, keeping his demeanor calm and optimistic. "So, how'd it go?"

"He did great. Dr. Yang's taking him back to the nursery now to eat. I put a rush on the X-rays, so they should be developed within the hour. Then Dr. Bailey and I are going to look over them, and we'll give you some answers as soon as we can," Arizona said.

"Do you think it's anything serious?" Amy asked.

"It's hard to say without seeing the X-ray results; but based on my personal assessment, I think it's probably just acid reflux. I see it in preemies all the time. But if not, then we'll fix whatever's wrong. At this point, there's no reason to worry," Arizona assured them.

"Will we be able to see him?" Tom asked.

Arizona nodded. "Of course. We just want to get him settled first. He wasn't too happy about not getting his bottle this morning, but once he eats, I'm sure he'll be up for some visitors," she joked. "Are you leaving today?"

"Yeah, we have to be at this airport in the late afternoon," Amy replied.

"I'll talk to Dr. Halloran, and make sure you guys get to spend as much time with him as you can," Arizona said.

"Thank you," Tom said, repositioning Kyle on his lap.

"My pleasure," she said. "I'll let you know when Dr. Bailey and I have reviewed the results, and we can meet in the conference room. I'll make sure the social workers are there, too."

Meredith smiled, tilting her head as Lilly grabbed a fistful of her hair. "Okay."

Arizona returned a polite smiled before turning around and walking back down the hall. Derek leaned forward in his chair, running a hand through his hair. "So far, so good," he said.

"Yeah. No reason to worry if we don't even know if we have to," Meredith agreed, patting Lilly's bottom. "She has my hair in her mouth, which is usually her hint that she's hungry, so I'm gonna go feed her before surgery."

"You can go with her if you want, Derek. Kyle's been asking to go on elevator rides since we got off the plane," Tom said.

Kyle looked up at his dad with wide eyes. "Can we?"

"Sure. Come on, buddy. Let's go," Amy said as they all got up out of their chairs. "If you hear any news, just call us."

"We will," Derek promised, smiling as the three walked down the hall toward the elevators. He put his hand on the small of Meredith's back as they headed for his office so she could nurse. "If the tests come back and it's something serious..."

"Hey, you're the optimistic one. Don't flake out on me," Meredith laughed softly.

"I'm not. It's just hard. Amy's my little sister. I don't like seeing her upset, that's all," Derek shrugged.

"I know. Let's just wait and see."

Derek nodded. "Yeah. Okay."

...

An hour passed before Meredith got the page from Arizona, who wanted to discuss Adam and how his test results would bode on the adoption process. They all met in the conference room within minutes. Family on one side of the table; Adam's doctors and social workers on the other.

Meredith held Lilly in the crook of her arm, fast asleep after nursing. She rubbed her fingers over the baby's tiny hand, smiling at the indents of her knuckles. She knew every perfect detail of her daughter, and seeing Amy and Tom go through all this made her appreciate each one of those details even more.

Once everyone was settled with the results and mountains of paperwork on hand, Arizona began speaking, a reassuring smile on her face. "Dr. Bailey and I reviewed the scans, and we saw no indications of a hiatal hernia, or any esophageal damage, which means he won't need surgery."

There was a collective sigh of thanks in the room, and Tom grabbed a hold of Amy's hand. "So, he's okay, then? Did you find anything?"

"It's nothing more than acid reflux, which is very common in preemies. That's why it's important to be vigilant with burping him after his feedings; otherwise, it could potentially get worse, in which case, he may need surgery to repair his esophagus. But because we caught it early, there's a far less chance of it ever progressing to that point," Arizona explained.

"Okay," Amy exhaled. "So, we just need to thicken his formula with rice cereal, right?"

Arizona nodded. "Nine times out of ten, that's all it takes. It's a quick fix, and it'll ensure that his food stays digested and doesn't back up into his esophagus. Just to be on the safe side, I'm recommending that he spend an additional two weeks here. Normally, I'd suggest one week; maybe even just a few days. But I went to the Chief and explained the circumstances, and he granted an additional week here, just to give us a time cushion. "

"Would that delay the option for temporary custody from going through?" Derek asked.

Michelle, who was Amy and Tom's social worker, shook her head. "Not necessarily. During the extra two weeks he spends here, I'm going to fly back to New York, and take care of things on that end. Your name is in the system from last time, and your verification and clearances are still current. At this point, it's just a matter of covering all our bases: making sure Adam is healthy enough to be put into your care, and getting everything signed and stamped," Michelle said.

"What do you think the chances are of us being given temporary custody?" Tom asked.

"I'm going to be on the agency like glue to make sure your paperwork is processed. And in situations like this, because he's a preemie with a possible need for special care, the agency won't shuffle its feet because of liability reasons. I'd say your chances are pretty good," Michelle replied.

"If all goes well, then in two weeks, I'd fly out with Adam as Seattle Grace's social work rep., and Michelle and I would finalize everything, in which case you would be granted temporary custody until we could schedule a hearing with a judge, who would grant Adam's legal, permanent adoption," Karen added.

"It's hard to put an exact time line on situations like this, but assuming that the request for temporary custody goes through, he'd be placed in your care by the end of October or early November, and you'd get a hearing six to eight weeks later," Michelle said.

"So, they'd have custody over Thanksgiving and Christmas?" Meredith clarified.

"That's the hope, yes," Michelle replied. "I'm flying back to New York with Amy and Tom tonight, and first thing tomorrow, I'm going to get the ball rolling."

"Thank you," Amy said softly, overcome with relief. She looked to Arizona. "Can we see him?"

"Absolutely. Take as much time as you'd like," Arizona agreed.

Meredith took Derek's hand and squeezed it, smiling at him. "See? Everything has a way of working out."

Derek glanced at Lilly, who held Meredith's finger while she slept. If there was anyone who understood the truth to that statement, it was him. He smiled back at her. "Yeah. It does."

...

The bags were packed and loaded into the car, awaiting the trip back to New York. Derek would be driving Amy, Tom, and Kyle to the airport to catch their flight while Meredith stayed home with Lilly. It had been a busy few days, the result of which would hopefully be a beautiful, little boy joining their family.

Amy tucked a small photo of Adam that the nurses had given her into her wallet for safe keeping, then she reached out her arms to hug Derek. "Thank you for everything," she said.

Derek kissed Amy's cheek as he hugged her back. "I didn't do anything. You guys are the ones who are gonna give Adam a family."

"Yes, but without you and Meredith, we never would have known he even existed; then, who knows what would have happened to him?" Amy said, switching out a hug with Derek for Meredith, Lilly between them. "Thank you."

Meredith wrapped her free hand around her sister-in-law and smiled. "We'll make sure to visit him every day. And call whenever you want."

"We'll even put Adam on the phone if you want us to," Derek chuckled.

"Really?" Kyle asked excitedly.

"Really," Derek echoed, ruffling his nephew's hair, then kissing his forehead. "I love you, buddy."

"Thanks for letting us stay here, too. With everything going on, we appreciate that more than you know," Tom said.

"It's no problem. We wanted to show off Lilly, anyway," Derek joked.

"Kathleen, Nancy, and Liz are already jealous that I got to meet her before any of them," Amy laughed. "And you all better be there on Thanksgiving."

"Wouldn't miss it," Derek assured her. "We'll set up an extra spot at the table for Adam, too."

Amy smiled at her brother. "Before we go, Tom and I wanted to tell you that if all of this works out, and Adam is ours one day, we're giving him your middle name. Christopher was Dad's middle name, and when you were born, Mom and Dad gave it to you. And whether you take credit or not, you're the reason we might have another son, so we wanted to say thank you by letting Adam share something with you," she said, wiping away her tears with the sleeve of her sweater.

"Ames, that's..." Derek said softly, bereft of a response. He nodded slowly in appreciation, and Meredith could see the tears in his eyes. "Thank you."

"We're honored to do it," Tom said, shaking Derek's hand, then Meredith's. "Thanks for everything."

Amy reached for Lilly's small hand, and held it in hers, pressing kisses to the back of it. "We love you, Lilly. We can't wait to see you again at Thanksgiving. And you know, your Mommy and Daddy are the best parents you could ever hope to have, and I mean that," she said.

"Thank you, Amy," Meredith said sincerely.

"Bye, Lilly. Bye, Aunt Meredith," Kyle waved.

Meredith waved back at him. "Bye, sweetie. Thanks for helping us so much with Lilly and keeping her entertained. I think she really loves you."

"Uh huh," Kyle said.

"Okay, we better go," Amy said reluctantly. "Take good care of Adam for us."

"We will," Meredith promised.

The four of them gathered into the car, and Meredith watched as they pulled out of the driveway, Lilly zipped in Meredith's jacket to keep her warm. When the car was no longer visible, she kissed the top of Lilly's dark head of hair. "What do you think, Lilly? Was this a success?"

Lilly looked up at Meredith with a smile, and Meredith hugged her daughter close as they walked back into the house. "I hope so, too."


	127. Lilly's First Halloween

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

**Thank you as always for your patience between chapters! School is stealing away all of my writing time lately, but I'm doing my best to write as often as I can. :)  
**

Three weeks had passed since Amy, Tom and Kyle had gone back home to New York. And Adam, thanks to copious amounts of begging and bribing, was granted an extra week to stay at the hospital by the Chief. Meredith and Derek visited him every day. They fed him and held him and spent as much time with him as they could. Though nothing was made official just yet, they still considered him as their nephew.

And today, it was Halloween, the first for both Lilly and Adam. Lilly's surgeon scrubs were sitting next to her changing table, ready to be worn for tonight, and Adam's pumpkin costume that they'd bought him a few days ago was in Meredith's bag, so they could take it to him when they went for a visit, even though they both took the day off, per their rule of not working on holidays.

For now, though, Meredith sat at the kitchen counter with Lilly cradled in her arm, while Derek made breakfast. She smiled, watching as he expertly scrambled the eggs and flipped the French toast. It was nice, getting the chance to have a sit-down breakfast without the threat of pagers going off, or racing against the clock to shovel down a bowl of cereal before leaving for work.

"What time did you want to take Lilly over to Alex and Izzie's tonight? Izzie said she'd be home by five," Meredith said, before taking a small sip of her orange juice.

Derek lowered the flame under the French toast, and leaned against the counter. "I guess we can get there between five and six. That's usually when trick-or-treating starts."

"I hope we score some good candy, since, you know, we get to eat it all. Or, I do, since you don't really eat candy," Meredith told him, patting Lilly's bottom. "Sorry, peanut. Next year, you'll have a few teeth and will be able to eat some. But we're still taking you trick-or-treating. It'll technically be my first time, too."

Hearing Meredith say that was like a punch in the gut for Derek, and he sighed quietly to himself. It killed him that Meredith never got to experience the joy of the holiday as a child because her mother didn't let her. But still, he smiled. Meredith got to be the mom she always wanted for Lilly, and history wouldn't repeat itself.

"I can't wait to put the costume on her. She's gonna look adorable," he said, putting two slices of French toast on her plate, following by a heaping spatula full of scrambled eggs.

"I know. I think the scrubs were the right choice," Meredith said. "When I told Cristina she was going to be a surgeon for Halloween, she actually hugged me and thanked me for not dressing her in something frilly."

"You would've looked cute in either of those, Lillybug," Derek said, walking around the counter to take Lilly so Meredith could eat.

"Next year, you can pick, Lilly," Meredith promised.

Derek's phone rang, and he pulled it from his pocket. "Amy," he read off the display. He quickly answered the call then held it to his ear. "Hello?"

Meredith could hear his sister's voice on the other end, but couldn't decipher what she was saying, so she looked at Derek, hoping to read his face for clues.

"The agency called you this morning? What did they say?" Derek asked anxiously. He bounced on his heels with Lilly sitting in the crook of his arm as Amy spoke on the other end.

And when a smile broke out on his face, Meredith gasped. "They got custody?" she mouthed.

Derek gave her a thumbs up and grinned. "Yeah, Mer, Lilly and I were gonna go up in an hour or so to see him," he said before pausing. "Mhm. Sometime tomorrow morning, then?"

Amy spoke again, and Derek nodded. "Yep, we'll make sure he has everything... blankets, stuffed animals, all the paperwork. Karen's done this before; he's in excellent hands."

Meredith tossed Charlie a small piece of French toast. "Looks like you're getting a new human cousin, buddy," she said.

"Love you guys. And congrats," Derek told his sister over the phone. "Okay. Talk to you later."

After hanging up the phone, Meredith looked at him expectantly, itching to know all the details. "Okay, so? What's happening?" she asked.

"The agency called them this morning. They were officially given temporary custody, and pending a hearing, Adam will be their child permanently within two months. Because Karen is Seattle Grace's social worker, she'll be flying out to New York with Kyle tonight, and Amy and Tom will get him tomorrow morning."

"I'm so happy for them. And for Adam," Meredith smiled, laughing slightly. "I have to say, I really wasn't expecting this call today."

"Neither was I."

"So, this means they'll have him for Thanksgiving and Christmas, which is good," Meredith pointed out.

"I know. I was worried about that," he admitted. "Amy sounded so happy on the phone. After what happened last time with the adoption falling through, she didn't get her hopes up, but now that it's official..."

"It makes it all totally worth it?" Meredith guessed.

Derek looked at Lilly, who smiled at him with her thumb in her mouth. "Yeah. It really does."

...

An hour later, they arrived at the hospital, and went up to the nursery to see Adam. Because the hospital had been his home since he was born, all of the floor nurses knew that Meredith and Derek both visited him frequently, so they designated a small nook of the nursery just for the baby. It was peaceful and more secluded, decorated with a blue name banner, complete with a cradle, changing area, and a rocking chair.

Derek held the door open, so Meredith and Lilly could enter first, then walked in behind them. When they spotted Mark holding Adam in his nursery nook, they smiled at him.

"Hey," Meredith said, Lilly looking over her shoulder. "What are you doing here?"

"I have to be in surgery in a half hour. It's chainsaw pumpkin carving contest day. Some guy accidentally chopped his hand off, so until he's ready to head up to the OR, I figured I'd come up to visit him," Mark shrugged. "Didn't think I'd see you guys up here today, 'cause of Lilly's first Halloween."

"Amy called us this morning. They got temporary custody," Derek said.

A grin spread over Mark's face. "No kidding. That's great."

"Yeah. Karen's flying out with him today, and we wanted to say goodbye, make sure everything was in order before he left," Derek nodded. "Hear that, Adam? You get to go to a new home today."

"Here. Swap," Mark said, reaching out his free hand to take Lilly, so Meredith could hold Adam.

Meredith gently passed Lilly into Mark's arm, then took Adam. She breathed in his new baby smell. "I'm gonna miss you, buddy. But Amy and Tom are amazing. And you get Kyle, too; he'll be a great big brother."

"How long until they get a hearing?" Mark asked, kissing Lilly's cheek.

"Probably not until January, but it's okay, as long as they have custody. I mean, I know he's taken care of here, but he needs stability. A house and a bedroom and a family," Derek said.

"And in a few months, you'll be a Shepherd family member," Meredith told Adam, who smiled at her. "Look at you, all grown up now, like Lilly. Smiling and learning to hold your head up all by yourself. Can't you both just stay little?" she joked.

"Lilly's not even five months old yet," Mark said.

"I remember when she was five _hours_ old. She was all wrinkly and new and hadn't even pooped yet," Meredith said nostalgically, passing Adam to Derek so he could have a turn holding him.

"Now, she's a pooping machine," Derek said, chuckling when Lilly glanced at him and gave him a big, gummy smile accompanied by one of her little coos. "Yes, I'm talking about you, Princess."

"Oh, that reminds me. I have Adam's costume," Meredith said, pulling the orange pumpkin costume from her bag.

"You got him a costume?"

Derek nodded. "It's his first Halloween, too. He deserves a costume. Plus, now he can surprise Amy and Tom when he gets to New York."

"You guys still going to the old house tonight for trick-or-treating?" Mark asked. "Bridget and I wanted to stop by to see Lilly in her badass surgeon costume."

"Yeah, we'll be there," Meredith said, unbuttoning the back of the costume for Adam. "And we decided that she's going to wear Derek's ferryboat scrub cap. We tried it on her a few days ago. She looks so cute."

"You mean all of her hair fit under that thing?" Mark teased.

"After several attempts, yes, it did," Derek laughed as he gently laid Adam down on the changing table. "It was freaky how much she looked like me."

"_Exactly_ like him," Meredith amended. "Which is why we got her a pink pumpkin bucket for her candy, so people know she's actually a girl."

Derek unsnapped Adam's onesie pajamas, and slung them over his shoulder after taking them off. "We pinned Mer's name tag to the shirt pocket, though, so she'll be wearing something from both of us," he said.

"She's gonna be the prettiest surgeon I've ever seen," Mark said, tickling the bottom of Lilly's socked foot, and grinned when she broke out in a small fit of giggles.

Meredith and Derek both smiled at their favorite sound. As much as they missed the wrinkly, new, five hour old Lilly, they were just as in love with the five month old Lilly that smiled and laughed made funny, little facial expressions all day long.

"Is Uncle Mark tickling you?" Meredith asked her daughter, reaching for a new diaper while Derek took off Adam's old one.

Just as Derek opened the pack of diaper wipes, Adam took the opportunity to empty his bladder, and a geyser of urine sprang up like a fountain. Derek quickly grabbed a wad of tissues from the box sitting on the shelf under the changing table to suppress the leak, laughing at the bad timing. "Really, buddy? You couldn't have waited ten seconds?"

"We have a girl. We're not used to mischievous baby penises," Meredith said.

"Guess you don't get peed on?" Mark assumed.

Meredith laughed. "Oh, we still do. Lilly pees on Derek more than she pees on me, though, which I appreciate," she said, catching the amused look on Derek's face. "It just doesn't shoot at us."

"She peed on me the day we brought her home from the hospital, all over the front of my shirt," Derek said.

"Impressive. You don't even have the equipment to aim, and you still pee on your Daddy. High five," Mark said proudly, tapping his palm against Lilly's.

"One of her many talents," Derek said, fastening the diaper around Adam's waist. He slipped a onesie over the baby's head, and maneuvered his arms and legs through the holes before snapping it.

"Here you go," Meredith said, handing him the costume.

Derek put Adam's costume on him without protest, then picked him up to survey his work. "Very handsome, Adam," he said.

"Yes, he is," Meredith agreed.

Mark noticed as Lilly scrunched her face in a serious scowl, and balled up her tiny fists, and he laughed. "She's either thinking real hard, or she's living up to that pooping machine nickname you gave her."

"I'll go change her," Meredith giggled, waiting until Lilly finished before taking her from Mark. She slung Lilly's diaper bag over her shoulder and walked toward the door to the nursery to take her to the bathroom right across the hall. "We'll be right back."

Derek smiled. "Okay."

"She's very chipper today," Mark commented after Meredith and Lilly left the room.

"She is. This is Lilly's first big holiday. Ellis wasn't big on holidays, so Meredith never really got to enjoy them growing up. Now that Lilly's here, she gets to do all the fun stuff she missed out on," Derek said. "I know I shouldn't resent Ellis, but I do. I couldn't imagine not taking Lilly out trick-or-treating. Mom worked two jobs, but still made all of our costumes, including yours. Six of them. And she wrangled us all by herself to go out and get candy. Ellis had one child, and didn't care enough to make Meredith a priority, just for one night."

"She was kind of a bitch," Mark said candidly.

"Mark."

"What? Am I wrong?" Mark upheld.

Derek sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Not entirely," he admitted.

"Maybe it's for the best. You guys get to right the wrongs for your own kid," Mark said. "Meredith practically skipped out of the room, just to go change a diaper. Think Ellis Grey ever did that?"

"I'm not sure Ellis changed a single diaper her whole life," Derek said. "Today's a good day, though. I get to go trick-or-treating with my wife and daughter, and Adam gets to go home to his real family. Couldn't ask for more than that," he said, ruffling his hand through Adam's dark hair. "Plus, it's a holiday. And Mer and I have a rule that we... get to have some alone time on holidays."

Mark raised his eyebrows. "Is that a euphemism for getting laid?"

"I was trying to be subtle for the sake of all the babies in the room, but yeah."

"Hmm, Halloween sex. Knowing Grey, that's bound to be a little kinky. Nurse, flight attendant, Cat Woman?" Mark guessed.

"Mark."

"Again, am I wrong?"

Before Derek could answer, Meredith had walked back into the room with Lilly, and caught the tail end of the conversation. "Nope, not wrong," she answered shamelessly.

Mark grinned. "Knew it."

...

Izzie dropped her oven mitt onto the counter when she heard a short knock at the front door, and walked out of the kitchen to answer it. When she saw Meredith, Derek, and Lilly on the other side of the glass, she smiled, turning the handle to let them inside. "You guys gave us this house. You really don't have to knock," she laughed.

"Derek and I have been walked in on in... less than appropriate circumstances. We always knock," Meredith said, kneeling down to unbuckle Lilly from her car seat.

"You mean when Alex and I walked in on you two having counter top sex? Yeah, I still have fond memories of that," Izzie teased. Her smile only grew when she saw Lilly in her surgeon costume, and reached for her. "Look how cute you are!"

"Cutest surgeon I've ever seen," Derek grinned proudly, setting Lilly's diaper bag next to her car seat.

Izzie hugged Lilly to her chest. "You look even more like your Daddy with the scrubs on."

"It figures. I carry her for nine months, and push her out of my body, and he gets all the glory," Meredith smirked. "But that's okay, because she's perfect."

"Yes, she is," Izzie agreed, letting Lilly grab hold of her necklace. "Did you get a lot of pictures?"

"Yeah, we got about a thousand before we left," Derek said.

"Okay, good, because I want copies," Izzie said as a small group of kids knocked on the door. "Looks like trick-or-treating's started. Better get going if you want to get the good candy."

Meredith reached for Lilly and smiled so Izzie could tend to the trick-or-treaters waiting anxiously at the door. "Yeah, we should. I want our fair share of chocolate and gum," she said.

"Better than loose change or old Easter candy," Derek pointed out, pulling a blanket out of Lilly's bag in case it got cold.

"Do people really do that?" Meredith asked.

Derek picked up Lilly's pink pumpkin bucket and laughed. "Hey, kids are demanding. Have to give them something."

"He's right. One time, when I was a kid, the neighbors ran out of candy, so they gave out cough drops," Izzie said after the kids had gotten their candy and eagerly went to the next house on the street.

"Eww," Meredith said, adjusting the ferryboat scrub cap on Lilly's head to make sure it covered her ears. "Guess we should get going then. We shouldn't be that long; just a few blocks."

"Take your time. I just took pumpkin bread out of the oven, and I'm going to make a pizza while you're gone. Alex will be home soon, and Sloan said something about coming by later with Bridget, so I wanted to make some food," Izzie said.

"You didn't have to do all of that," Meredith said.

"I know. I wanted to. Now go, have fun," Izzie said, holding the door open for them.

"We will," Meredith promised.

She and Derek waved back at her as they walked across the patio and down the steps, letting a group of little kids and their parents pass by before stepping onto the sidewalk. Derek took hold of Meredith's hand as they walked, and she leaned into him.

"Want me to hold her?" he offered.

Meredith bounced Lilly in her arm, and smiled when she saw how much her daughter was taking everything in with interest. "That's okay; I've got her."

The house on the left was the first stop on their route, and they walked up the steps to the front porch. A married couple, Mr. and Mrs. Bartlett, with college-aged kids lived there, and while Derek and Meredith had lived next door to them for a few years, they didn't interact much, except to exchange pleasantries in passing.

The woman smiled when she saw them approaching, and she picked out a chocolate candy bar from the bowl on her lap, dropping it into Lilly's candy bucket that Derek was holding. "Hi, there. We haven't seen you in ages," Mrs. Bartlett greeted, looking to Lilly. "She's beautiful. Lilly, isn't it?"

"Yeah. How did you know?" Derek asked in surprise.

"Whenever I run into Izzie, I always ask about you two, and she tells me all about your baby. The way she talks about her, I'd swear Lilly belonged to her, too," the woman joked.

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, we're lucky. Our friends really love her."

"And it looks like she's following in the footsteps of her parents," Mr. Bartlett said. "I remember when our kids were that little. Now, they're nineteen and twenty-one. Before you know it, she'll be all grown up."

"Yeah. One day, she'll be too cool for all this," Derek said amusedly.

"Enjoy every minute of it," Mrs. Bartlett said wisely.

Meredith propped Lilly up in her arm so she could get a better look at the carved pumpkin on the patio ledge. "I know. We really do," she said.

"Okay, well, we won't keep you. Have a good first Halloween, sweetie," Mrs. Bartlett said kindly, waving to Lilly. "It was so nice seeing you both. And congratulations on the baby. She's just adorable."

"Thank you," Meredith said graciously.

"Good seeing you," Derek said, nodding his head at both of them.

Another group of kids arrived just as they turned to leave, and they managed to maneuver themselves back down the steps in the midst of Cinderella, a cowgirl, Spiderman, and two football players. Once on the sidewalk again, they continued their stroll down the street.

"That'll be us one day. Sitting on the porch, giving out candy, while Lilly and future fictitious baby number two are away at college, not wanting to hang out with Mom and Dad," he chuckled.

"I will make them come home and spend every holiday with us," Meredith teased, pulling the penlight out of Lilly's white doctor's coat pocket so she could hold it. "Especially Halloween. Halloween and college parties lead to frat guys doing body shots of candy apple vodka off of you."

Derek gave her a look that was equal parts horrified and intrigued. "What? Preppy, Dartmouth frat guys actually did body shots off of you?"

"Once. Maybe twice," she shrugged. "It was a costume party. That's just what we did."

"Oh, yeah? What'd you dress up as?"

"A cat. Which was basically just black lingerie and some sexy cat ears," Meredith said.

Derek smirked. "Still have that costume?"

"I might," Meredith said vaguely as they walked up the steps to the next house.

"Seriously?" Derek asked, his curiosity piqued.

Meredith raised her eyebrows at him. "I guess you'll find out..."

...

An hour later, with a bucket full to the brim with candy, they walked back toward the old house. Lilly was still wide awake, and smiled at Derek, who held her in his arm. "Did you have fun, Lillybug?" he asked, kissing her forehead.

"I think she did. Although, I think she was more interested in all the lights and the little kids than the candy," Meredith said, picking a Reese cup from Lilly's candy bucket and peeling off the foil wrapper. She popped it into her mouth and moaned. "This is so good. I don't think I haven't had a Reese cup in... I can't even remember. Halloween is kind of awesome."

"I'm sorry you never got to do this as a kid," Derek said, hugging his arm more snugly around Meredith's waist.

Meredith shrugged it off, and smiled anyway. "Lilly does. That's all that matters," she said.

"Yeah," Derek said softly. "And because of you, Adam is on a plane right now, heading home to a family. You did that."

"I didn't really do anything," Meredith said as they walked back up the steps to the old house.

"You cared enough to stick by him. You promised you would help find him some people, and you did. Whether or not you give yourself credit, it's just the truth. You're a good person, Meredith," Derek said, smiling when Lilly put her thumb in her mouth, a sign of impending sleepiness. He leaned in and kissed her as they stood on the porch before going inside. "I love you."

Meredith put her hand on his cheek and kissed him back. "I love you, too."

The screen door opened, and Mark peeked his head out, holding the candy bowl. "Hey, lovebirds. Buzz and Woody would like to get some candy."

They pulled back from the kiss, turning around to see two trick-or-treaters standing behind them in _Toy Story_ costumes. "Oops. Sorry," Meredith apologized as a blush crept over her cheeks.

"Happy Halloween," Mark said, dropping candy into each of their pillow cases. After the two little boys walked back down the steps to join their parents on the sidewalk, Mark grinned at them. "Shame on you. Making out on the porch... while holding your baby."

Meredith just smiled and kissed her husband again with Lilly in between them, unconcerned that Mark was watching. Adam got a family, and Lilly got to go trick-or-treating. That was pretty damn good for one day.

"Hmm, yep," she agreed.

"I still expect dirty sex later," Derek murmured against her lips.

"So do I," Meredith said. "And for the record? I still have those cat ears..."

"Knew it."


	128. All Lilly Weekend

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

**So, so sorry for the wait! Luckily, the semester is almost over, which means lots more writing time. Enjoy!  
**

It wasn't often that Meredith got the chance to sleep in, so when she did, she took advantage of it, basking in the time spent under the covers without the inevitable blaring of the alarm clock. And today was no different. Derek was off the whole weekend, and by some stroke of fate, and subtly bribing Alex, she was, too. Forty-eight hours of Lilly time, something they'd been looking forward to all week.

Meredith was sleeping soundly with her cheek pressed against her pillow when she felt something touch her lip. Rather than opening her eyes and running the risk of not being able to fall back to sleep, she just scrunched her nose to get rid of the tickle. When it happened again, she moaned in protest.

"Later, Derek," she murmured into her pillow.

When the tickling happened for a third time, Meredith finally forced herself to open her eyes, all of her tiredness wearing off instantly when she saw Lilly staring back at her with a small, sleepy smile on her face. "What are you... you rolled onto your belly all by yourself?"

Derek's eyelids fluttered then opened when he heard Meredith's voice, and he yawned. "Hmm, what happened?"

"She rolled over," Meredith said.

"She did?"

"Yeah." Meredith reached for Lilly and sat her on her stomach, bending her knees to support Lilly's back. "You've never done that before, Lillybug."

Derek sat up and scooted toward them. "No, she hasn't. Belly to back, but not back to belly. Good job, Lilly," he praised, looking to Meredith in amusement. "Wait, why did you say my name?"

"I thought you were tickling my lip, but it was Lilly's hand," Meredith said, fixing one of the snaps on Lilly's duck-printed, footie pajamas.

"Since when does foreplay involve me touching your face?" he chuckled.

"I was sleeping, and barely coherent. I had no idea what it was," she defended.

"Did you want us to wake up, huh?" Derek asked Lilly, tickling her belly with his hand. "She's five months old today."

"I know," Meredith said, sighing softly. "This time, five months ago, I was in labor."

Derek glanced over at the clock on his nightstand. "Hmm, 9:30... right around the time your water broke in the hallway."

"Yeah, always like to be reminded of that," Meredith said. "I'd do it all over again, though. All of the pain and the pushing. I forgot all about it the second we saw her. She was perfect."

"And she gets more perfect every day," Derek said, leaning over to kiss Meredith, then forward to kiss Lilly. "What should we do today, Princess? This weekend is all about you."

"It's actually nice outside today, so I was thinking we could go to the park. We can put Lilly in the stroller, and bring Charlie along so he can run around. We haven't taken him to the park in months," Meredith said, patting the space between herself and Derek. "Come here, buddy."

Charlie yawned at them from his spot on the padded bench at the foot of their bed where he liked to sleep, then stood up and meandered over to the bed, plopping himself down. He sniffed Lilly with his cold, wet nose, and licked her cheek with his tongue. Lilly let out a fit of giggles and smiled wide.

"Do you like slobbery dog kisses, Lilly?" Meredith asked.

Derek ruffled his hand over the dog's fur. "You're a good big brother, Charlie."

"Should we go for a walk today, buddy?" Meredith asked him, watching as his ears perked up and he looked at her in instant excitement. "Okay, then. I think that's a yes."

"How about we go make some breakfast, then we can get packed up and go," Derek said, flinging his legs over the side of the bed. "What'll it be?"

"You pick," Meredith said, laying Lilly in her swing so she and Derek could make the bed.

"You've been working your butt off at the hospital. Most mornings, your breakfast consists of a mug of coffee and a granola bar on your way to work. You deserve a nice, sit-down breakfast," Derek upheld.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully, knowing there wasn't a chance she could convince him choose breakfast. "Hmm, fine. Pancakes?" she suggested.

"Sounds good," Derek said.

"And maybe after the park, we could try giving Lilly her first taste of baby food. Dr. Halloran said between five and six months, and when Lilly can hold her head up to swallow. She's been doing that for two months now. I think she's ready," Meredith said as they pulled the comforter up over the pillows.

"Yeah, we can do that," Derek agreed. "There's a farmers' market near the park, so we can buy fruits and vegetables. We got that purée thing when we got married. May as well try it out."

"Okay," Meredith said, picking Lilly up from the swing after they finished making the bed. "She's only ever had breast milk, so I read that it's best to start her off with sweeter flavors until she gets the hang of it. We can pick up some baby cereal this week, too."

"Yum," Derek said jokingly. He put his hand on the small of her back, and they walked out of their bedroom, letting Charlie run ahead of them. "Today's a big day for you, Princess. Rolling onto your belly _and_ eating real food."

"Real food?" Meredith echoed. "What have my boobs been giving her for the past five months? Magic food?" she teased him.

"You know what I mean. I happen to think very highly of your boobs," Derek smirked, stepping aside so Meredith could walk down the stairs with Lilly first.

Meredith laughed. "The flattery?"

"Yeah?"

"Needs work."

...

Lilly looked up at the world around her with interest, snuggled under the blanket in the stroller to keep her warm. It was one of the last few breezy weekends in Seattle, before the rain and chill of pending winter hit the air.

Meredith held Charlie's leash, and wrapped her other arm around Derek, leaning into him as he pushed the stroller down the pathway. "We should do this more," she thought out loud.

"Hmm, we will. Once spring rolls around, we can have picnics on the grass," Derek said.

"That sounds nice," Meredith smiled.

"Charlie's having fun," Derek chuckled, watching as he scampered along ahead of them, stopping every few feet to sniff trees and flowers. "He already has full reign of the backyard, but this is like Christmas morning for him."

"He reminds me so much of Doc," Meredith said, putting her head on his shoulder. "I mean, Doc was destructive, and liked eating laundry, but he was my baby. So was Charlie, until Lilly came along."

"He's so good with her. Since the second he first met her, he's been so protective of her," Derek said.

"A few days ago, I was putting clothes in the dryer, and Charlie came running into the laundry room. He kept nudging my leg with his nose, so I finally followed him out into the living room. Here, Lilly's shirt sleeve came unrolled past her wrist, and she couldn't suck her thumb. She was barely even whimpering in her swing, but Charlie still had to come find me," Meredith said, reaching into the stroller to stroke Lilly's cheek.

"Did he really?" Derek asked.

"Yeah. It was so sweet. I actually cried. You know, mommy hormones and all," Meredith laughed in spite of herself. "I never had pets growing up. My mom didn't like animals. Plus, she barely took care of me, so there was no way she was ever getting me a dog. That's why I'm glad Lilly has Charlie."

Derek smiled sadly and kissed her temple. "They'll be a good team when Lilly's a little older. Getting into all sorts of trouble."

Lilly looked at him and smiled, and Meredith laughed. "Yeah, we kind of need to baby-proof the house a little more once she starts to walk and get into everything. I'm pretty sure there's still condoms in the end table next to the couch, and we haven't used condoms in forever. Oh, and that sex stuff that Mark got us for our anniversary is in my nightstand."

"We can move it to a safer spot, but we're not getting rid of it," Derek compromised, glancing over at her with a smirk on his face.

"Oh, I'd never get rid of it," Meredith promised. "That stuff is fun. Kinky, and vaguely porny, but fun."

They rounded the corner, and passed by a young couple sitting on a bench, a toddler-aged child between them eating a cookie. Meredith looked to Derek and smiled. "Of all the parents in this park, I think we're probably the only ones discussing our sex drawer."

Derek caught her lips before she turned her head, and he kissed her. "Yeah, probably. One of the many reasons I married you."

"Why? Because of my inappropriate park talk?" Meredith said against his lips.

"And the kissing in public. That's nice, too," Derek added.

Charlie tugged on the leash, and Meredith involuntarily pulled away from him. "What is it, Charlie?" she asked.

A bushy, gray squirrel darted up a nearby tree, and Charlie's eyes watched as it ran up the trunk and disappeared into the branches. Derek couldn't help but laugh. "What is it with you and squirrels, buddy? He sees one, and he freaks out."

"Same thing happened when you and I tried to get some washing machine action," Meredith reminded him.

"Squirrels have it out for us," Derek joked.

"I think they do," Meredith said.

She pulled down the visor on Lilly's stroller to shield her eyes from the sunlight. It was barely sunny on the pathway because of the shadows cast by the trees on either side, but Meredith's mommy instincts didn't come with an off switch. Within seconds of her park view being blocked by the visor, Lilly's eyes welled up with tears, and she let out an upset cry.

Derek stopped pushing the stroller and frowned. "What's the matter, Lillybug? You want this up?" he asked, retracting the visor.

Lilly's crying ceased moments later, and she sniffled, putting her thumb back in her mouth. Meredith shook her head in amusement. "Really? You break out the crocodile tears and make Mommy feel bad?" she said, wiping the tears from Lilly's face.

"She's got us wrapped around her little finger and she knows it."

"Hang on a second," Meredith said, handing Charlie's leash over to Derek. She knelt down and grabbed Lilly's bag from the basket under the stroller. "I think I packed her sunglasses in here."

Derek raised his eyebrows. "She has sunglasses?"

"Yeah. I was bored and going crazy nesting during maternity leave, so Iz dragged me out to the mall. I found them at a little baby boutique," Meredith said, fishing the small, white rimmed sunglasses from the side pocket of Lilly's bag. "Aren't they adorable?"

Derek smiled, watching as Meredith gently put the tiny pair of sunglasses on Lilly's face. "Is this really the same girl who used to drink tequila on the porch and dance on tables?" he asked, untwisting the cap from their shared water bottle and taking a sip.

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him and smiled. "Shut up."

"Okay, I take it back," Derek said, grinning when he saw his daughter. "God, we made such a cute baby."

"Who's apparently a big nature enthusiast like you. Take away her view of the trees for five seconds, and boom, protest," Meredith giggled as they started walking again.

"Mocking me?" he asked.

"No, just pointing out a fact," Meredith said. "I'm Queen of the Indoors, and I married a charming, perfect-haired nature man. Lilly clearly got that from your end of the gene pool."

"She can be my outdoor buddy. I can't wait to take her out to the dock to go fishing. She'll be a pro at baiting hooks and casting lines. Right, Princess?" Derek said, ticking Lilly's feet before tucking them under the blanket to keep her warm.

"Okay, fishing is gross. But I'd camp out," Meredith said.

Derek smiled as he maneuvered the stroller around a crack in the sidewalk. "You'd really sleep outside in a tent?"

"Not in the middle of the wilderness, no. But in our own backyard? Hell yeah," Meredith nodded, linking her arm through his. "We can build a little fire and make s'mores and do other... campy things."

"Love to," Derek said.

They passed by a vendor selling soft pretzels and Meredith stopped. "Ooh, let's get one," she said.

"Okay," Derek chuckled. He pulled his wallet from his back pocket as they approached the vendor with the green awning next to a group of benches. "Oh, hot chocolate, too."

"Yep, best in the state," said the older gentleman who worked the vendor stand. "What can I get you folks today?"

"Two hot chocolates and a soft pretzel, please," Meredith smiled, gently pushing the stroller back and forth because she knew Lilly liked the motion.

"Coming right up," the man said, taking two cups off the top of the stack. "How old's the little lady? She's beautiful."

Derek grinned proudly as he pulled a few dollars from his wallet. "Thank you," he said. "She's actually five months old today."

The man handed over their pretzel and cups of hot chocolate, then reached into his apron pocket. "Well, in that case, she needs something special," he said. He pulled a pink balloon and blew it up with a pump. After shaping it into a heart, he handed it to Meredith. "Here you go. I'll let her mom hold it."

"Aww, that's very sweet," Meredith said gratefully. "Look, peanut. Just for you."

Lilly looked with happy curiosity at the balloon, and Derek smiled, handing the man a dollar tip. "She loves it; thanks so much."

"My pleasure," the man said, waving to Lilly in her stroller. "Have a good day, sweetheart."

"Thanks again," Meredith smiled.

They both waved to the man, then continued their walk down the path toward the small foot bridge that led to the farmers' market on the other side. Meredith took a sip of the hot chocolate, surprised by how good it was. "This is amazing."

"Yeah?"

Meredith nodded, handing him his cup. "Yeah. Almost as good as yours."

"Almost, huh?"

"See? I'm better at flattery than you are," Meredith said. She broke off a piece of the soft pretzel and popped it into her mouth. "This is really good, too. I'd say yours are better, but you've never made me homemade pretzels before."

"Fair enough," Derek said before taking a sip of his hot chocolate. "Damn, this is good."

"Told you."

They stepped onto the foot bridge, and Lilly's mouth formed a small 'o' shape, surprised by the rickety motion the stroller made as it crossed over the wood planks. Meredith laughed, tucking Lilly's heart balloon under her arm. "How is every face you make so cute?"

"I'm sure she'll give us lots of cute faces when we try to feed her a spoonful of mushy fruit later on," Derek chuckled.

"I made the camera was charging before we left," Meredith said as they approached the outdoor market.

Derek kissed her temple, her skin warm against his lips. "Hmm, good thinking."

...

An array of fruits and vegetables were spread on the kitchen counter, ranging in every color, size, and shape. They'd bought a smorgasbord of food from the market, so that Lilly could taste test it all, and they could figure out what she was a fan of, and what she wasn't.

Derek plugged in the food puréer and took off the lid. "So, what do we make first?"

"Umm..." Meredith said, holding Lilly in her arm as she surveyed the food choices. "I don't know. Sweet potatoes?"

"Okay."

While Derek prepared Lilly's food, Meredith put Lilly in her swing, making sure to adjust it so she sat upright for when she ate. After buckling her in, she kissed her daughter's forehead. "Look at you. You're such a big girl."

"Pretty soon, I'll be walking her down the aisle," Derek said as he tossed the chopped sweet potatoes into the puréer.

Meredith smacked his arm lightly with her hand after putting Lilly's bib on her. "Stop it."

"What? I'm kidding. She doesn't even have teeth yet. We have a few years before we need to plan her wedding," he pointed out.

"I think she'll be teething soon. She's been starting to drool more," Meredith said, heating a bottle so Lilly could wash down her food.

"Yeah, I noticed that, too," Derek nodded, scooping the goopy sweet potatoes into a bowl. "Are you gonna surprise us one morning with a tooth in there, Lilly?"

"Probably, yeah," Meredith laughed, pulling two kitchen chairs over so they were in front of Lilly's swing.

Derek took a baby spoon from the drawer, then sat down next to Meredith. "Okay, all set."

"Try some first; make sure they taste good."

"Why do I have to taste them?" he asked.

"Because I pushed her out of my body," Meredith said playfully.

"Fine," Derek agreed. He put a small spoonful into his mouth, and gauged the taste on his tongue. "It's sweet. Reminds me of Thanksgiving."

"Good; she'll probably eat it, then," Meredith said. She smiled excitedly at Lilly, hoping her daughter would pick up on her vibes and be willing to give the food a chance. "Ready for some yummy sweet potatoes, Lilly?"

Derek put a small amount on the spoon, then moved it in a wavelike motion toward her, watching as Lilly tracked it with her eyes. When the spoon reached her lips, she opened her mouth, letting Derek put the food on her tongue.

"Yummy, right?" he grinned.

Lilly licked her lips as she tasted the new flavor, scrunching her eyebrows in curiosity. Meredith reached for the camera on the table and got a picture of her.

"You look so cute."

Just when Derek was getting another spoonful ready, Lilly pushed the sweet potatoes out of her mouth and puckered her lips. Meredith smiled, pointing the camera at her again. "Lilly, look at Mommy."

Lilly glanced at Meredith with the orange gunk on her lips, and Meredith quickly snapped another photo. "Thank you," she giggled. "Even though you spit most of it back out."

Derek wiped Lilly's lips with her bib, then scooped out another spoonful. "She's just getting a feel for it. Let's try again," he said, giving Meredith a turn.

Meredith took the spoon and guided it to Lilly's lips, both of them smiling in satisfaction when she opened her mouth before the spoon even arrived. "Good girl," she praised.

Lilly smacked her gums together, giving it a second try. When she puckered her lips and scrunched her eyebrows again, both Meredith and Derek expected more spitting up, but when they saw her swallow it, they both cheered her on.

"That's my girl. Do you like it now, Lillybug?" Derek asked.

Meredith leaned in to kiss Lilly's nose, but when Lilly tilted her head up, she smushed the remaining sweet potatoes onto Meredith's mouth. "Mmm, thank you," she murmured, kissing the baby's lips.

"See? Tastes pretty good, right?" Derek smirked.

"Well, mine was partly spit up, but yeah, it's pretty good," Meredith said, wiping the sweet potatoes off her lip with her finger. "Thank you for sharing with me, peanut."

Derek laughed. "That was very sweet, Lilly."

"Are you thirsty?" Meredith asked. She reached for Lilly's bottle and put the top against Lilly's lips. She sucked on it for a few moments, then pushed it out of her mouth, her eyes going back to the spoon in Derek's hand.

"Wow, someone's hungry," Derek said, scooping more food onto the spoon. He waved the spoon up and down toward her. "Open up for the airplane," he said, his smile reaching his eyes when she actually did it.

"Well, the sweet potatoes were a hit," Meredith said, watching as Lilly gummed them around in her mouth. "What should we try for dinner, Lilly? Maybe some apples?"

"Mmm, sounds good," Derek said.

"And maybe with the extras, Daddy can make some caramel apples, because that would make me very happy," Meredith said to Lilly as she wiped her chin clean with her thumb.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Well, if you want to spend some time with my boobs that you're so fond of..." Meredith hinted.

Derek nodded. "Apples it is."

...

"I think we should take her out soon," Meredith said with a smile, leaning against the bathroom counter.

Lilly splashed the water around in her baby tub with her feet, and Derek laughed. "Oh, come on. She's having fun."

Meredith stuck her hand in the water to test the temperature. "Well, it's still warm. I guess we can wait a few more minutes," she said. She tickled Lilly's belly with her finger. "You're a little water baby, aren't you?"

"Maybe she'll be a gold medalist swimmer," Derek said. "She can be a surgeon in her spare time."

"How funny would it be if she wasn't into medicine at all? Like she came home one day and told us she wanted to be a lawyer... or a baker... or a dancer."

"I'd be okay with any one of those, as long as the dancing didn't involve a pole," Derek joked, wiping a drop of water off her forehead. "Hear that, Princess? We stay off the pole."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Did you just tell our five month old to stay off the pole?"

"Hey, start early, and the message sinks in," he replied, glancing at his watch. "Movie starts in twenty minutes. I guess we can take her out now."

"Has she really been in there for a half hour?" Meredith said as she reached for a soft, terrycloth towel from the shelf.

"Guess so. Ready, Lilly?" he asked, gently picking her up so he could hand her off to Meredith. "Here you go. One clean baby, with a very shiny hiney."

Meredith quickly wrapped Lilly up in the towel and started drying her off. "It's also very cute," she added. "Wanna clean up, while I get her dressed?"

"Yeah. I'll be right in," Derek nodded.

"Okay."

Meredith walked out of the bathroom and down the hall with Lilly, swaddled warmly in her towel. "We're gonna watch _Finding Nemo_. I've never actually seen it, but Daddy has. Apparently, it's a classic. We'll see," she giggled, laying Lilly down on the changing table to get her dressed.

She grabbed a new diaper off the stack on the shelf. "I didn't watch a lot of cartoon movies when I was a kid, but I did watch a lot of surgery tapes. I probably could've done an appy better than an intern when I was in kindergarten."

Meredith patted Lilly's bottom dry, then slid the diaper underneath her. After peeling back the adhesive and securing it around her waist, Derek walked into the room. "Hey, just in time. Can you get me a pair of pajamas for her?"

"Yeah." He walked over to Lilly's dresser and opened her pajama drawer. "What'll it be? We've got flowers, monkeys... oh, jackpot. Fishy ones," Derek said, taking out the long sleeved shirt and pants.

"Very clever."

"I think so," Derek grinned, holding the pajamas in his hand while Meredith rubbed some lotion onto Lilly's skin. "I promise, it's a cute movie. It actually reminds me of my nieces and nephews back in New York."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Whenever I'd babysit, they'd make me watch it. By that point, I was pretty sure I'd never be a dad, so it was fun, you know? Spending time with them," Derek said.

Meredith stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him. "Now you're a daddy that gets to do all that stuff."

"Hmm, yeah," Derek smiled against her lips. "Which is why I don't even care if you make fun of me."

"No more teasing," Meredith promised, stepping aside so Derek could dress Lilly. "I'm actually glad we're doing this... having family time or whatever. Lilly comes first, and I always want her to know that."

"She does," Derek said as he shimmied the pink and blue fish pajamas up Lilly's legs. "You've been the most important part of our lives since we knew you existed. It was October tenth, the day of your Uncle Alex and Aunt Izzie's wedding. Mommy told me she thought she might be pregnant, I held her dress while she peed, and five minutes later, we got the plus sign. That's all it took. We fell in love with you right then and there."

Meredith smiled at the memory, weaving one of Lilly's arms through her pajamas sleeves while Derek did the other. "We really did."

"I'm sure she'll hear that story many, many times growing up," Derek chuckled. He picked her up off the changing table and kissed her forehead. "Her hair's getting really wavy."

"I know, especially after her baths. I think it'll probably get curly once it grows a little longer," Meredith said, combing her fingers through Lilly's dark hair to smooth it out.

Lilly reached for Derek's chin with her tiny hand. "Are you getting impatient, huh? Okay, let's go watch Nemo." He put his hand on the small of Meredith's back as they walked out of Lilly's room toward the stairs. "And later on, you and I can have our fun... since I made you caramel apples and all."

"Uh huh," Meredith giggled. "Don't worry, I fully intend to hold up my end of the bargain."

"Looking forward to it."

"Me, too."

They reached the bottom of the stairs, and went into the living room, where the couch awaited them, stocked with pillows and blankets. Like sleeping late in the mornings, the chance to veg out on the couch was a rare, welcomed event, and they seized every opportunity to do so. Derek handed Lilly to Meredith, then leaned in to kiss her. "Go get comfy. I'll get our snacks."

"Hmm, thank you," she said.

Derek headed into the kitchen, and Meredith walked around the couch, dropping down onto the middle cushion. "Come here, Charlie," she said, patting one of the cushions next to her.

Charlie hopped next to her, spinning in circles until he finally decided to lie down. He rested his chin on her knee, close to where Lilly was sitting in her lap. She reached out with her hand to touch Charlie's face, quickly withdrawing it when she felt his cold, wet nose.

Meredith laughed. "You love slobbery dog kisses, but not wet noses?"

Lilly tipped her head up and smiled at Meredith, as though she agreed with her, then she leaned the back of her head against Meredith's chest. Meredith pulled one of the soft, flannel blankets over their laps, snuggling Lilly close to her. "Now all we need is Daddy with our snacks," she said. "Speaking of which, if you get hungry, let me know so I can feed you, peanut."

"All set," Derek said as he walked back into the living room with a tray of their food and drinks. He set it down on the coffee table in front of them. "Caramel apple or popcorn first?"

"Both," Meredith requested. "And tonight, I'll have very athletic S-E-X with you to burn off the calories."

"What exactly does this athletic S-E-X involve?"

"It means I'll be the one doing all the work..." Meredith said, patting the other cushion next to her. "You know, as long as I don't fall asleep under this cocoon of blankets."

Derek sat down next to her and kissed her temple. "Hmm, I'll do my best to keep you awake, then," he promised.

"Thank you." Meredith bit into the caramel apple and moaned. "Mmm, okay. We can add these to the list of things you can make."

"All I did was melt the caramel and dip the apples in."

"Well, you're pretty awesome at it," she said, draping some of the blanket over his lap. She rested her head on his shoulder and took in the warmth of him.

"I had a lot of fun today," Derek said, wrapping his arm around her. "I think our children had fun, too."

"Charlie is exhausted. That walk wore him out," she said.

The movie opening started on the TV, and Lilly was immediately drawn to it, taking in the bright colors and sounds. She made a delighted cooing sound, and both of her parents smiled at her.

"Looks like Lilly's got a little more steam left in her," Derek remarked, grinning at how happily content Lilly looked, sitting nestled in Meredith's lap.

"She already loves it," Meredith said, clapping Lilly's little hands together. She saw the Disney logo pop up on the screen, and turned her head toward Derek. "This is going to make me cry, isn't it?"

Derek laughed. "It's Disney. I'd say it's a safe bet."


	129. New York Bound

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows. That would be nice, though.  
**

**My school semester is finally over, which means more writing time. Yay! I'm going to try to bank as many chapters as I can before I start nursing school at the end of August. As always, thank you for your patience!  
**

Like every year before, the holiday season had snuck up on them. Between work and Lilly, life had kept them busy, and most of November had flown by in a blink of the eye. And now, it was time to head to New York for the Thanksgiving holiday, which meant lots of packing. Normally, the task wouldn't be so challenging. But traveling with a baby took it to a whole new level. Clothes, bottles, food, blankets, toys, diapers, wipes, soap, and even portable furniture all had to be taken along. The list was a mile long, and by the time they'd finished, a mountain of suitcases and bags sat by the front door, waiting to be loaded into Mark's car tomorrow.

Derek made sure their plane tickets and ID were accounted for, sitting on the table in the foyer, then finally went upstairs. He walked quietly down the hall toward his bedroom, so he wouldn't wake Lilly in case she was asleep. "Hey," he said softly after walking in.

Meredith looked up from Lilly, who was peacefully nursing. "Hey," she returned. "Everything all packed?"

"Think so. I just hope it all fits in Mark's car," Derek chuckled, gently sitting down on the bed.

"They don't mind picking us up, right?" Meredith asked.

Derek shook his head. "No, not at all. They know we have to get Lilly ready," he said. "Mark said they're gonna be here at seven. Our flight doesn't leave until ten, so we should have plenty of time."

"Yeah," Meredith said, before letting out a yawn. "I just called Izzie. She said Charlie's fine. He's currently lounging on the couch, watching TV with Alex."

Derek laughed. "Sounds like he made himself feel at home, then," he said. "I'm relieved they volunteered to watch him. Otherwise, he probably would've been camping out at Cristina and Owen's, and Cristina doesn't really strike me as an animal person."

"She probably couldn't handle a fish, let alone a dog," Meredith joked. "Izzie and Alex are animal people. He'll have fun."

"Yeah, he will," Derek agreed as he finally caught her yawn. He glanced at the clock on his nightstand. "It's only 9:23. Why does it feel like midnight?"

"Because we have a five month old," Meredith smiled tiredly, smoothing her fingers through Lilly's dark hair, still a little damp after her bath. "How do you think she'll be on the plane?"

Derek smiled at his daughter, whose eyelashes kept fluttering as she tried to stay awake. "She'll be fine. Mark and Bridget will be in the seats in front of us, so between the four of us, I think we can keep her entertained," he said.

"That's true," Meredith giggled. "I'm glad they decided to come."

"Me, too. Maybe they can get in some good parenting practice while you and I renew our Mile High membership," he hinted.

Meredith rolled her eyes, amused. "Sure, let's do that," she played along, patting his thigh. "But hey, with a house full of people dying to meet Lilly and make a fuss over her, that should give you and I some time to sneak away for a quickie."

"Really? What about your 'no sex at my mom's house' rule?" he asked.

"I always end up breaking it, anyway. Besides, I kinda like that I'm the only girl you've ever slept with in that bed," Meredith admitted, biting her lip.

"The one and only," Derek said.

"Well then, as long as there aren't _Batman_ sheets on it, I'm all yours," Meredith said, turning her head to kiss him.

Derek smiled against her lips. "Hmm, what about race cars? I think I still have those."

"That's kinda hot," she said, just as she felt Lilly unlatch from her breast. Meredith pulled away from the kiss and smiled at their baby, who was looking up at the two of them with half-closed eyelids. "Oops. You caught us, Lillybug."

"Are you tired, Princess?" Derek asked, taking Lilly from Meredith so she could fix her shirt. He held her to his chest and began patting her back. "How about you give Daddy a few good burps, then we can all go to sleep. We're going to see Grandma and everybody tomorrow, and they're all so excited to meet you."

Lilly let out a tiny burp, and Meredith giggled, setting Lilly's nursing pillow on the bench at the foot of the bed, so they would remember to bring it with them. "I think that means she's excited to meet them, too."

...

Holiday weekends at airports were as bustling as a busy day in the pit, only without the blood and gore. And while the five of them sat tucked away in their own little corner of the airport terminal, Meredith was still doing her best to shield Lilly from any germs. She pulled a diaper wipe from Lilly's bag, and gently cleaned off Lilly's hands in case she put them in her mouth.

Derek watched her, unable to keep from smiling at his wife. For someone who used to have a penchant for tequila and one night stands, the doting mommy that Meredith had become always amazed him.

"You're cute," he said, taking a sip of his coffee.

Meredith looked up from her extensive cleaning between Lilly's fingers. "Shut up," she smirked. "Airports are dirty. And it'll be even worse on the plane. All of that recycled air and everyone packed together like sardines. It's like a germ carnival."

"You should've stolen some surgical masks from the scrub room," Mark said.

"Yeah, because a five month with a surgical mask wouldn't look suspicious," Bridget pointed out with a laugh as she checked her phone for the time. She smiled at Lilly who sat on Meredith's lap across from her. "But you'd still be the cutest baby ever."

Derek noticed to Lilly's eyelids were getting heavy, and he tickled her belly. "We need you to stay awake, Princess. Just a little while longer," he said, smiling when the baby laughed in response.

"Why are you keeping her up?" Mark asked.

"It's a six hour flight. The goal is that she sleeps through most of it. When she's bored and cranky, she'll make sure you know it," Derek teased.

"I'm worried about her ears popping, too. The books said to use pacifiers, but she doesn't like them. At least she'll take a bottle or nurse, though. And she always sucks her thumb when she's tired. Plus, I have baby earplugs, which are supposed to work," Meredith rambled as she finally finished cleaning Lilly's hands.

Mark leaned back in his chair, raising his eyebrows in surprise. "Wow."

"What?" Derek asked.

"I didn't realize there was so much... planning involved," he shrugged.

"You mean with a baby? Always. There's no such thing as get up and go anymore," Derek chuckled, reaching for Lilly on Meredith's lap to put her on his own. "I'll save you before Mommy decides to break out the Purell and disinfect you."

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him playfully. "Do you want me to go back on my sex promise? Because I will," she threatened.

"What sex promise?" Mark asked.

"I told Derek we could have sex while we were away... you know, as long as Lilly was in good hands for twenty minutes," Meredith said as she put Lilly's wipes back into the diaper bag.

"Just say the word. Bridget and I will watch her while you two go knock one out in the _Spiderman_ sheets," Mark promised.

"You make it sound so romantic," Meredith said dryly. "But sure, that would be nice."

"Attention passengers of Flight 297 bound for JFK airport in New York, your flight will now begin boarding. Please gather your belongings, and make your way to the gate," said the voice of the flight attendant over the airport intercom.

"Finally," Mark sighed.

The four of them walked toward the gate, making it there before the larger groups, so they would be able to board more quickly. After the flight attendant scanned all of their tickets, they were allowed onto the plane where another attendant directed them to their correct seats, smack in the middle of coach.

Derek glanced to Meredith when they reached their row with three seats. "Window or aisle?" he asked.

"Window, I guess; just in case I have to nurse her, I'd rather be shielded a little," Meredith said.

Derek nodded in understanding. "Yeah, sure," he said. "I'll put her car seat in the middle seat, then."

"That works," Meredith said as she scooted into the short row with her bag and Lilly's diaper bag. After setting them on the floor under her seat, she reached for Lilly. "Come here, peanut."

Lilly tilted her head upward as she looked around the plane, fascinated by the change of scenery. Derek strapped the baby's car seat in the plane seat between them, tugging on the buckle after fastening it to make sure it was secured tightly.

When he was satisfied with his work, he dropped down into the aisle seat and buckled his own seat belt. "Isn't this fun, Princess?" he asked his daughter.

"She's very into all of this," Meredith laughed, gently laying Lilly in her car seat and buckling her in. She wriggled around and kicked her legs, much preferring to be held. "I know, Lillybug. We'll take you out as soon as we're in the air. We just need to keep you safe and snug for takeoff, okay?"

Mark turned around from his seat in front of theirs. "If you need us to hold anything up here, we have the room," he offered.

"And if you want to pass Lilly up here for a bit, we'd be more than happy to entertain her," Bridget added.

"Thank you," Meredith said gratefully.

"We're gonna hold you to that," Derek teased, taking off Lilly's baby-sized Uggs. "There we go. May as well be comfy, right?"

Meredith took one of the pacifiers she'd packed out of Lilly's bag, and held it to her lips to see if she would be willing to suck on it. "I know you're not a fan of these, but I need to try, anyway."

Lilly tentatively accepted the pacifier, sucking on it curiously for no more than a few seconds before spitting it out in disinterest. Derek picked it off of her belly where it landed. "Okay, then," he chuckled.

"I would try the earplugs, but she's already not liking the car seat. I don't want to risk a meltdown in the middle of a crowded plane," Meredith said, kissing Lilly's forehead. "If she seems uncomfortable, we can try them."

"Yeah, that's all," Derek agreed. He made a funny face at Lilly in an attempt to cheer up her car seat woes, and she let out a tiny giggle. "Tell Mommy there's nothing to worry about it. You have us to keep you entertained for six hours."

Lilly's smile was interrupted by a big yawn, and Meredith laughed at the timing. "I think she's tired of your usual material. She wants new stuff."

"Hey, if I have to tap dance in the aisle, I'll do it," Derek joked.

Mark turned around in his seat again. "I'd pay good money to see you do that."

...

The first three hours of their flight had gone off without a hitch. Lilly had slept through most of it, waking briefly when she was hungry. Meredith had dozed off after nursing her, and now, Lilly sat peacefully in Derek's lap as he paged through a neurosurgical journal with his free hand.

When he smelled something familiar, he tucked the journal into the seat pocket. "Uh oh. What've we got?" Derek asked, discreetly peeking into the back of her diaper. "Someone needs a diaper change," he said. He carefully reached for Lilly's bag under their seats, contemplating his next move.

"Mark," Derek said.

"Yeah," Mark said, pausing the game of Angry Birds he was playing on his phone, Bridget sleeping in the seat next to him.

"Can you do me a favor?" Derek requested. "Lilly needs a new diaper. I need you to hold her stuff while I change her in the bathroom. Mer's asleep, and I don't wanna wake her."

Mark's initial reluctance dissolved when Lilly smiled at him. "Fine, let's go."

Derek got up out of his seat with Lilly, and Mark followed him to the back of the plane where there were two small bathrooms flanked side by side. "Here, can you take this?" Derek said, handing Mark the diaper bag.

"Yeah," he said, catching the disapproving look of an older woman seated near the back of the plane. He quickly showed her the diaper bag and pointed to Lilly. "It's for a diaper change. We're not lovers having a quickie; relax."

He and Derek both peered into the cramped bathroom, and Mark shook his head amusedly. "Yeah, there's no way we can both fit in here and change a diaper at the same time," he said.

"I know," Derek said, pulling down the small changing table station from the wall while Mark held the door open. Derek tested the weight of the changing table with his hand. "I don't feel safe laying her on this. It's as flimsy as cardboard. You're gonna have to hold her while I change her."

"You're lucky I love you, kid," Mark told Lilly, holding her under her arms after Derek swapped her for the diaper bag.

Derek set the diaper bag on the sink ledge. "As her uncle and godfather, I'd say it's pretty much an obligation," he said as he took a fresh diaper and wipes out. He pulled Lilly's pink pants off her legs and slung them over his shoulder. "I should be letting you do this. You're gonna need the practice for when you have your own. What better practice than a stand-up diaper change in an airplane bathroom?"

"Nice try. I'm good holding her at arm's length," Mark said.

Derek peeled back the adhesive tabs on Lilly's diaper, doing his best to clean her despite the less than ideal changing position. When she started bending and swinging her legs, Derek had to laugh. "Now's really not a good time for the aerobics, Princess."

"That's not a pee dance, is it?" Mark asked worriedly.

"She pees in a diaper, so there's no pee dance yet," Derek said, tossing the dirty diaper in the trashcan. He managed to put the fresh diaper on her, then shimmied her pants back up her legs. "How'd we do?"

Mark turned Lilly from front to back, surveying their work. "Not bad," he said with a satisfied nod.

"Thanks for helping. Lilly and I appreciate it," Derek said, drying off his hands with a paper towel after washing them in the small sink. He zipped the diaper bag and picked it up. "Alright, let's get out of here before we get more dirty looks."

"Some people just have their minds in the gutter. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against airplane sex. Just not with you. And I wouldn't bring your kid along for it," Mark said, bouncing Lilly in his arm.

Derek turned off the light and closed the door after they stepped out. "Glad you cleared that up," he chuckled.

When they walked back down the aisle and reached their row, Mark kissed Lilly's cheek and handed her back to Derek. "Here you go. Fresh as a daisy."

"Thank you," Derek smiled. He sat back down in his seat, settling Lilly on his lap once again. She leaned into him and rested her head against his chest. "I love you, Lillybug," he said softly.

Meredith shifted in her seat, her eyelids heavy as she woke up. "Hmm, hey. How is she?"

"She's fine. Mark and I just had a diaper changing adventure in the bathroom, and now, we're just hanging out," Derek said.

Meredith giggled. "You two tag teamed a diaper change?"

"Yep. And we did a damn good job," Mark chimed in. "Bathroom's free now, if you two wanted to get some action," he joked.

"We're good, but thank you," Meredith declined, rolling her eyes playfully. She kicked off her shoes and twisted her legs into a pretzel. "I actually did it in college. Trust me, it's overrated."

"Did you really?" Derek asked.

"Yeah. Spring break. A bunch of us took an overnight flight to Cancun. It was a dare, and I was bored and horny, so I figured why not. It was quick; in and out in ten minutes," Meredith said, pointing her finger at Mark when she noticed the smirk on his face. "No pun intended. Don't even say it."

"Who was this with?"

"My boyfriend at the time, Scott. It wasn't all it's cracked up to be. It was cramped and dirty and... oh, that reminds me! Lilly didn't touch anything in the bathroom, right?" Meredith asked, armed with a travel pack of wipes next to her.

Derek smiled at Lilly when she yawned into his shirt and closed her eyes. "No, she didn't," he assured her.

"Wait, wait. I want to hear more about this plane hook-up," Mark interrupted.

"There's nothing to tell. It was just sex on a plane," Meredith shrugged.

"I gotta admit, I'm kinda jealous that you've actually done it, but not with me," Derek said.

"Tell you what, if we're ever on a private plane, I'd be more than happy to do you on it," she promised him.

"Okay, then," Derek grinned.

"Now, before this conversation gets any more inappropriate, how about we switch to a new topic. I have Mad Libs, or we can take turns reading _Pat the Bunny_. It's one of Lilly's favorites," Meredith suggested, pulling both options from her bag.

"What the hell is _Pat the Bunny_?" Mark asked.

"It's interactive. It helps babies learn senses," Derek explained.

Meredith flipped the book open and pointed to the soft, white fur on one of the pages. "See? You literally pat the bunny."

Mark raised his eyebrows in equal parts shock and amusement. "Is this really the same girl who had dirty sex on an airplane?"

"That was a long time ago. I'm a Mommy now," Meredith said. "So, what'll it be? Mad Libs or bunny book?"

Lilly's sleepiness seemed to wear off when Meredith showed her the book cover, and she smiled at it. "Okay, bunny book it is," Meredith said.

Mark slowly turned around in his seat, withdrawing his inclusion in the activity. Derek laughed as he draped a blanket over Lilly's legs to keep her warm. "You're missing out, Mark."

Mark raised his hand in a small wave. "Mhm..."

...

The final hours of the flight passed slowly. Six hours in the OR passed by in an eye blink, but six hours spent sitting on a plane wasn't so exhilarating. After reading the whole library of books to Lilly that Meredith had packed, the baby fell asleep on Derek's lap. And without Lilly awake to keep them entertained, there wasn't much else to do but resort to doing Mad Libs, playing Go Fish, and chowing down on complimentary airline pretzels.

Just as Meredith was about to start a crossword puzzle in a one of the trashy tabloid magazines she'd bought before their flight, the pilot came over the intercom to announce that they were beginning their descent into JFK airport. Meredith shut the magazine and tossed it into her bag. "Oh, thank God," she said.

"I know," Derek chuckled, gently laying Lilly back in her car seat and buckling her in, so she would be more protected when they touched down on the tarmac. "There we go. All set for when we land."

Lilly's eyelids fluttered open briefly and she yawned, blinking tiredly as her eyes got adjusted to the light. "Hi, Lilly. You did so good," Meredith praised her daughter.

"She really did," Derek said as he helped Meredith pack all of their bags up. He leaned in to kiss Lilly's forehead. "We always knew you would, though."

The plane experienced some mild turbulence as it descended, and Lilly's lower lip began to quiver as the plane jostled slightly, startling her. Meredith noticed and went into action, attempting to quell what could potentially turn into a loud crying fit.

"Shh, you're okay. It's just little bumps. We're almost on the ground," Meredith said softly. Though she knew Lilly has no idea what she was saying, she hoped her voice and smile would be enough to comfort her. She held out her finger by Lilly's hand. "Here, hold my finger, peanut."

Lilly grabbed onto it and gave Meredith a small smile in return. Derek noticed the exchange between the two of them, unable to keep from catching both of their smiles. "Crisis averted?" he asked.

"I think so," Meredith nodded, using her free hand to rub circles over Lilly's belly.

Derek put the last of Lilly's items back into the diaper bag and zipped it shut. "Well then, I'd say this was almost a success."

"Almost?"

"There was no Mile High-ing," he joked.

Meredith patted his arm in mock sympathy. "At least you and Mark had fun in there."

Derek laughed. "Changing Lilly's diaper? Oh, yeah. Definitely the highlight."


	130. Lilly Meets the Family

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

"We're here, peanut," Meredith told Lilly as Mark pulled the rental car into the driveway of Derek's childhood home. She unlatched the car seat from the base, then glanced up at Derek, squished in the other side of the backseat. "I guess we should just take the whole seat in, right?"

"Yeah, I guess. Although, I'm sure everyone will want to hold her the whole time," Derek laughed, looking to Lilly. "What do you say? Ready to meet the other half of your crazy family?"

Lilly reached for his face, making a delighted cooing sound at him, as though she were actually excited by what he'd said. Derek smiled at her. "Okay, then. Let's go."

The four of them got out of the car, Derek holding Lilly's car seat, while the rest grabbed as much luggage as they could. "You'd think we were staying for a month," Bridget managed to laugh, as she and Mark hoisted a suitcase from the trunk.

"That's all Derek's beauty products," Mark joked.

Derek rolled his eyes. "Yeah, just you wait until you have a baby," he said. "Half of Lilly's nursery got packed for this trip."

"It's true," Meredith defended. "We have a five pound bag of just her bath supplies."

"Damn," Mark said.

"All part of being a parent," Meredith said, slinging said bag of Lilly's bath items over her shoulder, then handing a lighter bag to Derek.

"What's in this one? Want me to get it?" Mark asked, pointing to a large rectangular bag in the back of the trunk.

"That's her bassinet," Meredith said. "If it's too much for you to hold, we can come back for it."

Mark reached for it and pulled it out with a grunt. "That's okay; I got it," he said, before closing the emptied trunk. "That's everything."

"Everybody savor these last moments of quiet. Once we go in, there's no turning back," Derek chuckled, leading the way up to the front door of his mother's home. He managed to open the glass door with his elbow, pushing it open wide enough so they could all enter with the various bags they were holding.

"We're here!" he called out from the foyer.

Within seconds, the army of Shepherd adults and children appeared, ready to greet them. Meredith could barely believe how quickly they congregated, almost out of thin air, but for Derek, who had grown up in the middle of all the people and noise and chaos, it was normal. His mother was the first to approach them, wrapping her arms tightly around Derek.

"Hi, sweetheart. We're so glad you're all here," she said happily, kissing his cheek, and wiping off the lipstick she left there with her thumb. She made her rounds, hugging Meredith, Bridget, and Mark, then reached for Lilly, who Derek had since taken out of her car seat. "Hi, Lilly. I missed you so, so much."

"At least you've met her before. Many of us haven't," Kathleen pointed out playfully, as she and the rest of the family got their first real glance at Lilly.

Liz put her hand over her heart and smiled. "Oh, you guys. She's so perfect," she said in awe.

"She's beautiful," Nancy said. "We've seen about a million pictures, but to see her in person? She's..."

"Breathtaking," Derek's mother finished, hugging Lilly to her and breathing in her baby smell. "I can't believe how much she's grown since June. And look at this hair!"

Derek grinned proudly. "It gets wavier every day. Sometimes, we even see little curls when she's fresh out of the tub."

"My little brother is really a daddy now. It makes me want to cry," Kathleen said, reaching for a tissue. "Okay, my turn. Let me hold her."

"How about we all go on into the living room and make ourselves comfortable?" Derek's mother suggested, waving Mark, Bridget, Derek and Meredith out of the increasingly cramped foyer.

Derek glanced over at Bridget and Mark. "This will be you guys next year. Mom just takes your baby, and she gets passed around the room," he joked.

"We're glad you guys came. Otherwise, we'd be getting interrogated on whether or not I was pregnant yet," Bridget said. "Lilly's a good distraction. She takes the pressure off of us."

"Happy to help," Meredith giggled, smiling when she saw Kyle, Tom, and Amy walking down the steps with Adam. "Hey, there you are. It's so good to see you."

"You guys, too. Sorry we missed you coming in. The boys just woke up," Amy said, hugging each of them as best she could, Adam snuggled in the crook of her arm. "Let me guess. Lilly's already been snatched away?"

"Yeah. About thirty seconds after we walked in the door," Derek chuckled.

Meredith waved to Adam, the little boy who had once been their patient and was now their nephew. "He got bigger. And he's even more adorable than he was the last time we saw him."

"Hey, buddy. We missed you," Derek told the baby, whose hair had gotten darker and whose eyes had gotten bluer, the spitting image of a Shepherd, even if he didn't share their DNA. "All the NICU and OB nurses ask how he's doing. They all loved him. He was a little heart breaker."

"He still is, don't worry," Amy assured them.

"How do you like being a big brother, Kyle? Keeping Adam out of trouble?" Mark asked him, ruffling the boy's hair.

"Uh huh," Kyle nodded.

"Kyle's been so great with him. We're really lucky," Tom said. "We actually got a hearing date last week. We're scheduled in the beginning of January, and when all is said and done, he's legally ours."

Derek gave Tom a friendly clap on the back and smiled. "That's great. We've been wondering if you'd heard anything yet."

"We were so relieved to finally get the call. We're anxious to get everything finalized. Even though he's been ours from the second we first saw him," Amy said as she smiled down at Adam, who happily sucked on his pacifier. When his eyes landed on Meredith and Derek, he stopped sucking briefly, as if he recognized them. "Do you remember them, sweetie? They're the reason you found us."

"We just did the legwork. You guys did the rest," Meredith said, quickly peeking into the living room to make sure Lilly was okay. Even though they were her relatives, to Lilly, they were strangers, and Meredith didn't want her getting overwhelmed by all the new faces.

"Whether you take credit or not, we'll always be grateful to you," Amy said sincerely.

Kyle looked up at Meredith and Derek, eagerly bouncing on his heels. "Can I go see Lilly?"

"Sure you can. Let's go try to find her," Derek said.

They all joined the rest of the family in the living room, where Lilly was currently in possession of Nancy, the sister whose uptight demeanor had made Meredith wary of ever meeting the rest of Derek's family years ago. But now, as Nancy made a fuss over Lilly, Meredith couldn't help but smile. Derek's entire family had welcomed her with open arms, and had done the same with her daughter, falling in love with Lilly seconds after meeting her.

"How's she doing?" Derek asked his sister as he slinked his arm around Meredith's waist.

"I don't think you're going to get her back until you leave," Liz said, peeking over Nancy's shoulder. She tickled Lilly's belly with her finger, and Lilly let out a happy giggle, ever the social butterfly. "Oh my God, that little laugh. How do you get anything done looking at this face?"

"Oh, we don't," Derek joked. "We used to go to the bar across the street from the hospital most Friday nights, or pick up on-call shifts together on the off chance a good case would come in. Now, we spend every minute we can with her. One Saturday, we spent her entire two hour nap time just watching her sleep."

"It's true. They've gone all _Full House_ over there," Mark interjected.

Derek glanced over at Mark, equal parts disturbed and amused. "The fact that you know what _Full House _is says more about me than it does about you," he ribbed.

"It's my fault. I watched it when I was a teenager. Now, whenever there's reruns on, I make him watch," Bridget explained.

"We used to make Derek watch it, too. He wanted to watch sports, but got outvoted every time," Liz said, finally prying Lilly away from Nancy so she could get her turn holding her.

"I remember one time when Derek was in kindergarten..." Kathleen began what was sure to be a charming family memory; only to Derek, it was more embarrassing than anything.

Rather than make a futile attempt to squelch the story, he simply kissed Meredith's temple. "We've been here for five minutes, and they're ready to pop in the home movies."

Meredith leaned into him and smiled. "I need to get my hands on those..."

...

Once every relative under the Shepherd roof got the chance to ooh and aah, and hold Lilly to their hearts' content, Meredith and Derek managed to sneak upstairs with their daughter, carrying as many bags with them as they could. Derek opened the door to his bedroom after they walked down the hall, letting Meredith enter with Lilly first.

"That was eventful," Derek said as he closed the door behind himself.

Meredith kicked off her shoes and dropped back onto the bed. "I know. Lilly is exhausted," she said, letting Lilly lie on her chest. "The time difference is making her sleep schedule all loopy. Think she'll sleep tonight?"

"I think so. All of the nieces still want to play with her. I swear they think she's a doll," Derek chuckled.

"Well, the real thing is always better than the plastic version," Meredith pointed out before pausing. "Okay, that sounded like a sex joke, which I didn't intend."

"Porny," Derek accused, sitting down next to her on the bed.

Meredith laughed through her yawn. "No, just tired," she corrected, looking down as Lilly nuzzled her nose into Meredith's breasts. "Are you hungry, peanut? I guess I should feed you before we go back down."

Derek took Lilly from her while she got situated to nurse, doing a quick calculation of how the three of them would be able to sleep in the bed tonight. With the king-sized bed they had at home, there was enough room plus extra; but he wasn't sure the full sized bed in his room would sleep them all comfortably.

"What?" Meredith asked, noticing the contemplative look on his face as she set a pillow on her lap.

Derek handed Lilly to her, smiling at how easily Lilly just curled into Meredith's chest and started to nurse. "Nothing; this bed just isn't as big as ours. I know we brought the bassinet, but she prefers sleeping between us."

"Maybe if she falls asleep after I nurse her later on, we could give it a trial run. If she doesn't protest, maybe she'd be okay for the next couple nights," Meredith suggested.

"Yeah, we can try that," Derek said. He spotted one of his childhood photo albums sitting on his bookshelf, and got off the bed to retrieve it. After sitting back down next to Meredith, he flipped it open. "I know you always like looking through these in search of blackmail," he teased.

"That's not true... most of the time. You were an adorable little boy," Meredith giggled, her breath catching in her throat when she saw a photo of Derek at six months old, the age Lilly would be in just two weeks. "Oh my God, she looks so much like you."

Derek smiled, glancing from Lilly to the picture. "Wow. She really does."

"Your hair and eyes. Your chin. Even your little facial expression. All Lilly," Meredith said, stroking her daughter's rosy, soft cheek with her finger.

"Whenever I look at baby pictures of you, I think you and Lilly look identical, minus the hair. I guess it depends on whose baby book is open," Derek chuckled. "And right now, we're in a house full of Shepherds. When we went to your Dad's for his birthday and were surrounded by Grey's, Lilly looked like your little clone."

"The Greys are a small village compared to the continent of Shepherds," Meredith teased as she rested her head on his shoulder. "Keep flipping. I haven't seen these before."

"Okay," Derek said, turning the page. A slight blush crept over his cheeks when he spotted a baby photo of himself on his stomach, wearing nothing but his birthday suit and a big, gummy smile on his face. "Yikes. This is mortifying."

"Oh, shut up. You watched me push our baby out of my hoo-hoo with my legs all up in the stirrups. You don't get to be embarrassed by your tiny baby hiney," Meredith said with a smile. "Look at the little dimples!"

"I don't have dimples," Derek said, confused.

"I wasn't talking about those cheeks," she said, pointing to Derek's baby bottom in the picture. "Now I know where Lilly got hers from."

"Please don't share that tidbit with Mark, or I'll never hear the end of it," Derek requested.

"I won't. Although, I'm looking forward to your mom's story about the ultrasound where she found out you were a boy, and how happy she was to see a little penis on the screen after having two girls."

"Yeah, that's one of her favorites. She especially loves telling it with a lot of people around," Derek sighed playfully.

Meredith patted his thigh in sympathy. "I think it's adorable," she said, looking down when she felt Lilly slip off her breast, fast asleep after only nursing for a few minutes. She leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "All done?" she said.

"Someone was tired," Derek whispered, helping Meredith fix her shirt to keep Lilly from being accidentally woken up. "Did you want to rest up here with her while I go downstairs?"

"No, I'm good. If I fall asleep now, I probably wouldn't wake up until morning. And Lilly's passed out. I don't think all the chaos going on downstairs will even faze her," Meredith said, holding Lilly to her chest as she carefully got up off the bed.

They retreated from the enclave of Derek's bedroom and headed back downstairs. The noise had settled slightly since they arrived, though the younger kids were still playing off in the family room. They went into the living room where Derek's mother was sitting with his sisters.

"Where did all the guys go?" Derek asked as he and Meredith sat down on the couch in front of the window.

Kathleen pointed to the kitchen. "Cooking. Since the girls cook Thanksgiving, we thought it was only fair they handled the pre-Thanksgiving dinner," she said.

Derek looked curiously to Mark. "Why are you still in here?"

"I was waiting for you, to make sure you didn't sucker your way out of it," Mark replied.

"Why would I do that?" Derek asked, pressing a kiss to Meredith's cheek and the back of Lilly's head. He hoisted himself off the couch with a grunt. "It was so nice to sit down for ten seconds," he chuckled.

"You both flew across the country today. I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you sat this one out," Linda said, always the doting mother, even to two grown men.

"No, it's fine. We'll catch up. Mer, do you want some water?" he offered, wanting to make sure she stayed hydrated after traveling all day, especially because she had just nursed.

Meredith smiled at him as she gently rubbed Lilly's back with her fingers, the baby still sleeping on her chest. "Thank you," she said.

"Coming right up," he said, following Mark into the kitchen.

All of Derek's sisters and his mother turned to Meredith, and Meredith blushed under their gaze, which wasn't anything short of awestruck. Before she could ask why, Kathleen jumped in. "Okay, we all know he's too humble to talk about what a good dad he is, so we need the stories," she said.

"Start at the beginning," Liz requested. "And don't skimp on the details."

"Okay, uh..." Meredith pondered for a few moments before she spoke. She had millions stories filed away in her brain, but trying to remember one on the spot was intimidating, especially in a room full of Derek's mom and sisters. "Well, he still loves telling everyone about her birth. He spares no details, even when it comes to my water breaking in the hallway, and how long I pushed for."

"It's so sweet," Bridget interjected. "He's a like a little kid on Christmas morning."

"Yeah, he is," Meredith said softly, feeling Lilly's hand grip onto her shirt while she slept.

Derek came back into the room with Meredith's water glass, and grew suspicious when all the conversation came grinding to a halt. "Aah, I see how it is. You all want me to think you're not in here talking about me..." he assumed.

"Exactly. Now shoo, so Meredith can keep talking about you," Kathleen said from her spot on the couch.

"You can't boss me around anymore," he said, handing Meredith her water.

"I'm still your big sister. I've been bossing you around since Mom and Dad brought you home from the hospital," Kathleen reminded him.

Derek chuckled. "You were four."

"Yes, and I was damn good at it," his sister said playfully.

"Fine. I'm going," he said, looking to Meredith. "Nothing too embarrassing. I have a reputation to uphold."

"I'll do my best. Thank you for the water," Meredith smiled.

Once Derek was out of earshot, Meredith picked up where she left off. "Oh, there was this one time when I had just gotten home from work. I was on-call overnight, and it was early the next morning. Anyway, I went into the kitchen to put on some coffee when I heard Derek singing to Lilly over the baby monitor that was on the counter. He was trying to get her back to sleep after feeding her. I just stood there with the coffee pot in my hand and listened. It's like when she was born, he just went into daddy mode. I mean, I knew he would, but seeing them together, it's like that's his purpose. He loves changing diapers and rocking her to sleep as much as he loves saving lives."

She blushed at her rambling. "Sorry. I didn't mean to go on and on. I just... he's a really great dad."

Derek's mother blotted her eyes with a tissue and smiled. "Oh, sweetheart, don't apologize. I'd love it if you sat here for days, and told us stories like that one."

Meredith took that as her cue to continue, always excited to talk about Derek and Lilly. She talked for over an hour, sharing all she could: Lilly's penchant for peeing on him, their matching _Clash_ tee shirts, the way they both slept with a hand on their chest, made the same grumpy face, and his determination to turn her into a New York sports fan.

Derek's mom and sisters reveled in all of it, listening with delighted interest, and Meredith was happy to share it all. While she spoke, she couldn't help but notice the sad smile etched on Bridget's face, but she couldn't exactly pause to ask if she was okay. And then Derek came in and announced that dinner was ready, so she decided to put a pin in it, although she already had a hunch.

...

Meredith nursed Lilly after dinner in the den where it was secluded and peaceful. Lilly was already full of sweet potatoes she'd eaten at dinner, but Meredith wanted to make sure she got the chance to nurse in case the baby slept through her feeding later on that night, exhausted after the excitement of the day. Derek and Mark had been roped into a football game in the backyard with all of the nephews and brothers-in-law, so the house was finally quiet. Meredith was so focused on Lilly's sweet, little sucking sounds that she barely heard Bridget pad into the room.

"Oh. Sorry. I didn't know you were in here nursing," Bridget said softly, turning around.

"No, it's fine. You can sit. Your husband saw my boobs once when I was nursing in the attending lounge at the hospital. Really, nothing fazes me anymore," Meredith giggled, patting the couch cushion next to her.

"He told me. He felt so bad," Bridget said as she gently sat down, careful not to disturb Lilly.

"Is everything okay?" Meredith asked, cursing herself for bulldozing right into talking when she planned on easing into it. "Sorry, I just... when we were all talking earlier, I noticed that... it just seemed like something was bothering you. If you don't want to talk about it, it's totally fine. I just wanted to make sure you were okay, that's all."

"Yeah," Bridget said before sighing. "Well, actually, no. No sense in lying to you."

Meredith frowned. "What? What's wrong?"

"I don't know. I guess I just figured I'd be pregnant by now. We've been trying for almost six months—which I know isn't long at all, but still, I really thought when we came out here for Thanksgiving, we'd be making an announcement."

Meredith's heart squeezed inside her chest, and she hugged Lilly closer. "Bridge..."

"Sorry. I don't want to unload on you, especially when you're spending time with Lilly," Bridget said, shifting uncomfortably.

"No, don't feel that way. Unload all you want," Meredith said in support. "And you're right, six months isn't long. You don't have anything to worry about. It takes time. And I know me saying that probably sounds hypocritical, but honestly, I'm still shocked I got pregnant as fast as I did. Derek and I started trying in May, and I didn't expect to get pregnant until the following May rolled around. Even Dr. Halloran was surprised when I called in October and told her we got a positive test."

"Mark keeps telling me not to stress, that it'll happen when it's meant to happen. It's just stressful," Bridget said.

"Is Halloran concerned? She doesn't sugarcoat things, so if something were wrong, she'd tell you," Meredith pointed out.

"No, she just said that it's normal, and that if it doesn't happen within a year, we could discuss fertility drugs and things like that," Bridget said. "Eve hearing 'fertility drugs' scared the crap out of me."

Meredith shook her head in dismissal. "Don't think about that. You've only been trying for a few months. It's only the end of November. Believe me, you have nothing to worry about," she assured her.

"Maybe I'm just being paranoid. And it doesn't help that two of my kindergartners have twenty year old mothers, or that another mom is pregnant with her eighth," Bridget managed to laugh.

Meredith laughed, too. "Well, that's not going to make you feel any better," she said. "Really, it's going to happen. And when it does, you'll wonder why you were so worried in the first place."

"Were you? I mean, I know you and Derek weren't trying for very long, but still. Were you scared that it might not happen?" Bridget asked.

"Of course," Meredith said truthfully. "I think it's human. Before I met Derek, I didn't even want kids. Then after we got married and decided to start trying, having a baby was all I could think about. The first few times we tried, I felt like it was all business, you know? Tracking everything and planning when to have sex and how often. But then, I stopped stressing so much and we had fun with it. Once there was no pressure, that's when it happened. Nine months and one week later, Lilly was born," she said softly, brushing her finger over the baby's cheek.

"I hope Mark and I can tell a story like that one day," Bridget said, smiling at the way Lilly stretched her toes in her tiny socks.

"You will. And I know this sounds very Derek-y, but optimism is a pretty powerful thing," Meredith said. She squeezed Bridget's hand with her free one that wasn't holding Lilly. "Everything's going to work out."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Meredith echoed, just as Lilly unlatched. She discreetly covered herself, then wiped the corners of Lilly's mouth. "Right, Lilly? Tell Aunt Bridget she has nothing to worry about."

Lilly yawned sleepily, smiling at both of them. Bridget tickled the baby's belly with her finger. "How can I not be optimistic when I see this face?" she said.

Meredith readjusted her shirt, then draped the burp cloth on Bridget's shoulder. "Do you want to burp her?" she offered. "I know I'm probably biased, but even her little burps are cute. They'll lift your spirits. Plus, you're going to need the practice."

Bridget laughed as she accepted Lilly, holding her to her chest. "I'd love to," she said. Once Lilly was situated over her shoulder, she turned toward Meredith gratefully. "Thank you," she said softly.

Meredith smiled. "Any time."

...

The day was finally over, and both Meredith and Derek felt like they had been awake for a week straight. This morning, they woke up in Seattle; and now, they were across the country in Derek's childhood room. Meredith walked into the bathroom attached to the bedroom, holding her toothbrush.

Derek was already standing at the sink, brushing his teeth, and Meredith wrapped her arms around him from behind, burying her nose into his tee shirt. He smelled woodsy and clean like his soap, and she breathed him in.

Once Derek gargled and rinsed, he smiled. "Hey. Where's Lilly?"

"Sleeping in her bassinet. I think she might actually sleep through the night in there," Meredith said, her eyes closed, still holding onto him.

"Really?"

"Mhm," she murmured.

When she still didn't release her hold on him, Derek laughed. "Are you awake?"

"Barely," she yawned, squeezing him a little closer. "Mostly I'm just hugging you."

"If you let me turn around, I can hug you back," Derek said. Meredith loosened her arms and Derek turned toward her, hugging her back as promised. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Thanksgiving and all. I'm just grateful. You know, for you and for Lilly. I can't imagine life without either of you," she said softly, her head resting on his chest as her conversation with Bridget played over and over in her mind.

Derek kissed the top of her head. "Me either."

She let herself revel in the warmth of his arms for a minute longer before pulling back. "I need to brush my teeth before I fall asleep standing up, which I could very easily do right now," she giggled.

"I'll go get the bed warm," Derek said, handing her the tube of toothpaste.

Meredith squirt a dollop onto her brush, then peeked her head out of the bathroom where he was pulling down the covers on the bed. "I call the race car pillow," she said.

"Fine. I wanted the superhero one, anyway," he teased.

Meredith smiled at him. "Good."

...

**(For those that are interested, I'm writing a post-Flight one shot. It should be posted within a day or two, so be on the lookout!) **


	131. Lilly's First Thanksgiving

**Disclaimer: Shonda owns it. Not me.**

**Thanks for your patience, as always! And thanks so much to those that review, and all those that review anonymously whom I can't e-mail in a review reply. I appreciate them all so much! :)  
**

Lilly wiggled in her bassinet after waking up, staring around the bedroom she didn't recognize. The only thing familiar to her was the sound of her parents' breathing as they slept. She rolled first to her left, expecting to see her mom like she always did. But when she was missing, Lilly rolled to her right, the place where her dad always slept. When she was met with pink, lacy padding on both sides, her lower lip quivered, and she let out a small cry, wondering where her two favorite people were.

As soon as Meredith and Derek heard the sad, little sound, they were pulled from their sleep. Meredith had barely opened her eyes when she swung her legs over the side of the bed. "What's wrong, Lillybug?" she asked, scooping her out of the bassinet. "Not used to sleeping by yourself, huh?"

"Is she okay?" Derek asked.

Meredith sat back down on the bed, letting Lilly lay on her chest as she settled down. "Yeah, she's fine. I think she's so used to waking up between us in the mornings. Maybe she got worried when she didn't see us."

"We're right here, Princess," Derek said softly, kissing the top of Lilly's head. He glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside nightstand. "Wow, 9:06. I didn't expect to sleep that long."

Meredith laughed, peeking into the back of Lilly's diaper to make sure she didn't need a change. "Technically, it's only 6:06 in Seattle, so we're still sleep deprived."

"Hadn't thought of that," Derek said through a yawn. "Oh, well. May as well get a jump start on the day."

"Did you have anything in mind?" Meredith asked, smoothing her fingers through his hair, his curls sticking out in every direction after sleeping all night.

"Yeah, actually," Derek said, scooting into a sitting position. "I was thinking we could drive out to the cemetery where my dad is buried. If you don't want to, I understand. I just thought it would—"

Meredith reached for his hand and squeezed. "I'd like that," she said.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she echoed.

Derek smiled at Lilly, who smiled back at him. "I'll tell my mom, but I'd rather my sisters not know—nothing against them; I'd rather it just be the three of us, that's all."

"I get it," Meredith nodded. "If you want, I could nurse Lilly while you take a shower, then you could take her downstairs while I'm getting ready."

"I was kind of hoping I could take a shower with you," Derek said as he set his feet on the floor and stood up. "You know, like we did last time."

Meredith smiled. "Last time we did that, Lilly was the size of an apple and living inside me. We didn't have to ask someone to watch her while we... showered," she said, letting Derek take Lilly so she could adjust her shirt to nurse. "But once she falls asleep tonight, it's fair game."

"Really?" Derek asked in surprise.

"Well, we do have our holiday sex tradition. So yes, we can," Meredith promised, cupping his cheeks with her hands and kissing him before accepting Lilly into her arms.

"Okay, then. I'll make sure to eat light tonight," he teased.

"On Thanksgiving? We're probably going to be like beached whales in turkey comas," Meredith pointed out.

Derek pursed his lips as he considered that. "On second thought, maybe we should actually shower in the shower, and do the spoony sex thing after."

"Ooh, I like spoony sex," Meredith agreed, holding Lilly to her chest.

Lilly put her hand on Meredith's breast before latching, and Meredith snuggled her close as she rubbed her back. "I'm really glad you don't know what we're talking about, peanut."

"If she did, you and I would be footing her very expensive therapy bill," Derek chuckled.

"Which is why we need to let her Uncle Mark and Aunt Bridget watch her while we... keep tradition. I can't have sex with her in the room," Meredith said.

"I can't tell Mark to watch my kid while we have sex," Derek said, cringing at the thought.

"Well, I suppose we could ask one of your sisters. Or your mom. I'm sure she'd be fine with it," Meredith shrugged nonchalantly.

Derek glanced up at her and smirked. "The sarcasm... it's cute," he said, rummaging in their shared suitcase for his toiletries. "Fine. Mark and Bridget it is. Plus, a little babysitting practice couldn't hurt. I'm sure they're gonna make one of their own soon."

Meredith bit her lip, her conversation with Bridget the night before still fresh in her mind. But instead of bringing it up with Derek, she just smiled. "Yeah."

"Okay, I'm going to shower. I won't be long," Derek said, walking into the adjacent bathroom.

"Okay."

Once the bathroom door closed and Meredith heard the shower spray hit the floor, she looked down at Lilly. "You know, I really didn't expect Daddy to suggest going to the cemetery. His dad died a long time ago, but it's still hard for him to talk about it. I think part of why he wants to go is for you. He wants to make sure you know who your grandpa was, because Daddy loves you so much. And I think that's pretty cool of him, don't you?"

Lilly looked up at her with the trusting blue-green eyes that she reserved for parents, giving her a happy smile as she nursed. Meredith kissed the baby's tiny forehead. "Yeah, me too."

...

After breakfast, they bundled Lilly up in her winter coat, and trekked out to the cemetery where Derek's father was buried, a thirty minute drive from the Shepherd home. For Derek, the drive had become rote, even though he hadn't visited in years. Every memory of the day they buried his dad flooded back into mind. He could remember the cold January morning in perfect detail: the uncomfortable, heavy suit he wore, the sound of his sisters' crying, and his mother's red-rimmed eyes as she tried to hold herself together for the sake of her children.

They pulled into the cemetery, and Derek navigated the winding roads until he reached the row where his father rested. After turning the car off, Derek felt Meredith's warm hand take his, and she smiled at him.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Meredith asked.

Derek looked over at her and smiled back. "Yeah. I do."

"Okay," she said.

They got out of the car, and Meredith scooped Lilly out of her car seat in the back, swaddling her in a blanket to keep her warm over her coat. Meredith tucked the baby's hat over her ears, then held her close. "There you go. All wrapped up like a burrito," she said.

Derek put his hand on the small of her back, and they began walking down the row of headstones. Before Meredith could even read the name on Derek's father's, she could guess which one was his. It was the most well maintained plot in the row, decorated with flowers and a grave blanket. And when Derek stopped in front of it, Meredith realized she'd been correct.

_James C. Shepherd  
Beloved Husband and Father  
__September 3, 1940 - January 21, 1983_

Meredith heard Derek clear his throat as he tried to keep his emotions at bay, and she reached for his hand again. She laced her fingers through his and squeezed. "It's okay to talk about him," she encouraged gently.

"It's weird being back here. I haven't been here in... six years, I think," he pondered out loud. "My mom visits a lot. A few times a month. Once a week, if she has the time. That's why it still looks brand new. She's always replacing the flowers and shining the headstone. Every year on their anniversary, she brings a bouquet of daffodils for him."

"Yeah?"

"Daffodils were their flower. He gave her daffodils on their first date, and a daffodil corsage for every dance and prom. They had daffodils at their wedding. And every time my mom had a baby or they celebrated an anniversary, he'd give them to her. It was just their thing."

Derek wiped tears under his eyes with his coat sleeve, then wrapped his arm around Meredith's waist. She leaned into his warmth. "They really loved each other," she said.

"Yeah, they did. Even with five kids to raise—six, counting Mark—and trying to make ends meet, they never let the stress get to them. Never took each other for granted. She was a sophomore in high school and he was a senior when they met," Derek said.

"And they never dated anyone else?" Meredith asked with quiet admiration.

Derek shook his head. "Nope. Once they met, that was it. Even after he died, she never met anyone else, which made sense at the time. She had young kids to take care of; we were always her first priority. But even after we'd all gone away to college and grown up, she still wasn't interested," he recalled before smiling. "She always said she'd already met the love of her life, and even though he wasn't here, it didn't change how much she was still in love with him."

Meredith rested her head on Derek's shoulder, and savored just being near her husband and daughter. She was grateful for Derek and Lilly every second of every day, but knowing what Derek's mother went through, and seeing what a strong, loving person she was then and now made her feel even more blessed to have both of them.

"God, he would've loved you two," Derek said. "He never got to meet you or any of his sons-in-law or grandkids."

"He knows who we are," Meredith said, kissing the top of Lilly's head, kept warm under her hat. "Right, Lilly? Tell Daddy."

Derek reached for Lilly, who was on a mission to free herself from the fleece blanket Meredith had wrapped her in. "Come here, Lillybug," he said, his somber mood improving exponentially the second he held Lilly.

He sat down on the grass and set Lilly in his lap, and Meredith followed suit. She was unsure of what protocol dictated in an unfamiliar situation like this, and she bit her lip as she watched Derek's face. He stared at the headstone in front of them, his lips pursed in thought. But when she saw that look dissolve into happiness, she felt that same happiness fill her, too.

"You know, he wouldn't have wanted us to be sad, especially not on Thanksgiving," Derek said, tucking Lilly's foot back into her Ugg boot, then the blanket after she'd managed to wiggle it free. "He'd want us to be happy."

"What made him happy?" Meredith prodded, hoping to spark the conversation. She wanted Derek to open up and talk as much as she wanted to hear the stories of his childhood, the ones that helped shape him into the man he was today.

Derek snuggled Lilly closer to his chest after she leaned into him. "Being a dad. He loved being a dad. And he always made sure that the two of us got time to ourselves, away from the estrogen festival in our house," he chuckled. "You know that tree house in the backyard?"

"Yeah."

"My Dad, Mark and I built that one summer," Derek said.

Meredith turned her head toward him. "Really? That tree house is huge."

"Yeah. The wood's been replaced two or three times since we built it, but it's the same design," Derek nodded. "My parents turned the basement into a playroom for all of us when we were little. Eventually, Mark and I got tired of the girls always taking it over. They used our G.I. Joes as Barbie's husbands, and turned our Erector Sets into Barbie's amusement park."

"I was never a fan of Barbie, but you've got to admit, that's creative," Meredith giggled, warming up with the sunlight hitting their backs.

Derek rolled his eyes playfully. "Yeah, very," he joked. "My Dad saw that we were losing ground, so he decided we needed our own space. He helped us draw up blueprints, then we went and bought all the wood. It took us two weeks to build. We were so proud of it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. We hung out in there every day. Even my Dad would come up sometimes, usually on Friday nights when my sisters blasted music in the basement and had dance parties. It was quiet up there. No one bothered us. We would talk or play card games; sometimes we'd listen to the game on the radio and eat popcorn. It was fun," Derek said.

"Lots of good memories?" Meredith guessed.

"Really good memories. Some of the last ones I have of my Dad, actually. We planned on putting in a retractable rope ladder, so the girls couldn't climb up the wooden steps on the tree trunk and invade us. He died before we got the chance," Derek sighed, taking hold of Lilly's hand, kept warm in her purple mitten.

Meredith rubbed her hand over his thigh. "I'm sorry," she said softly.

"I remember a few weeks after my Dad died, I was up in the tree house flipping through his baseball card collection. He had a whole album full of them. Anyway, next thing I know, Mark climbs up and hands me a rope ladder, and tells me to get up off my ass and help him install it," Derek said before laughing. "Even at twelve, Mark had an extensive cursing vocabulary. My Mom was grateful that I never picked up on it."

"Sounds like Mark hasn't changed," Meredith joked.

"No, he really hasn't," Derek agreed. "So that afternoon, we installed the rope ladder by ourselves. I never would've built it if he hadn't made me. It was his way of helping me move on. Helping me cope, you know?

Meredith smiled, pulling him closer to her. She'd seen Mark gush over Lilly enough to know that he had a sweet side, but to hear about those small moments of compassion he showed Derek made her grateful to him, too. "That's what your Dad would've wanted."

"I know. That's why I'm really glad that Mark was around. We didn't talk about feelings or anything, but it was nice just having him there. I didn't have to put on a brave face for him."

"It's good that he was there for you," Meredith said.

"Mark and I were close before that, but after my Dad died, we were like brothers. He practically lived with us until we went to college. Then we shared a dorm for four years... which was fun, except for when he'd try to hook up with girls while I was studying on the other side of the room," Derek recalled.

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, Mark really hasn't changed. Well, until he met Bridget, anyway."

"Yeah, and I don't know why this conversation veered to Mark," Derek said.

"He was there for you when you needed him the most. I get that. You were there for me after my Mom died, and that still means the world to me," Meredith said, scooting closer to him on the grass. "Do you have any more stories about your dad? I really like hearing about him."

"God, tons," Derek said, unzipping his coat and bundling it around Lilly to keep the slight wind from blowing on her. He kissed the top of her head. "You know the music box in your room, Princess? That belonged to Daddy, and before that, it belonged to my Dad. His mom hand-painted it for him. Whenever I walk into your room and see it on the shelf, it reminds me of your grandpa. It's like a piece of him is always with you."

Meredith looped her arm through Derek's and kissed his cheek. "He is, Derek."

They spent another hour sitting in front of the grave site, and the more Derek talked about his father, the more relaxed he became. His somber mood faded to a happy nostalgia, one that made Meredith glad they decided to come. She knew how much Derek still missed his dad, even though he'd been passed away for nearly thirty years, and she would have happily sat there all day with him had he asked.

Before they left, Derek tucked a laminated picture of Lilly into one of the bouquets of daffodils, with the words _To Grandpa, Love Lilly_ written on the back.

...

Like most events in the Shepherd house, Thanksgiving was big. Lots of adults, lots of kids, and lots of food. The kitchen table was actually comprised of five different tables that spanned the dining room and living room. For Meredith, even the thought of _planning_ a Thanksgiving dinner like this was overwhelming, much less executing it smoothly. But after so many years, the Shepherd family had it down to a science.

Lilly sat on Derek's lap, her blue eyes wide with wonder as she surveyed everything. Compared to the quiet dinners she typically ate with her parents and Charlie, even she seemed to sense the enormity of whatever it was that was going on. After Derek's mother said grace, the chaos began, and all of the food started making its journey from one of the table to the other.

"Here you go. I pureed some of the vegetables for Lilly and put them into little bowls for her to try," Linda said as she set a small tray between Meredith and Derek's place settings.

Meredith smiled at her mother-in-law. "You didn't have to do that."

"Thank you," Derek said.

"It's no problem, sweethearts," Mrs. Shepherd said, giving both of their shoulders a gentle squeeze before making her way down to the head of the table.

"She's like Super Mom. She cooked three turkeys and still had time to cook for Lilly, too," Meredith said in awe as she fixed Lilly's hair bow. "I was just planning on mushing up the vegetables on my plate to give her."

Derek tickled Lilly's belly with his finger. "That's because your grandma loves to spoil you," he chuckled.

"You two do it, too," Mark chimed in, grinning at them from the other side of the table.

"So do we," Bridget reminded him.

"Yeah, I guess we do," Mark admitted. "She's too cute not to spoil once in a while."

"I guess you guys are getting in lots of parenting boot camp with Lilly, huh?" Kathleen asked.

"Derek and I changed her diaper in the airplane bathroom. We actually did a damn good job, too," Mark boasted jokingly.

Derek laughed as he fixed the frill of Lilly's dress. "I did all the work. You just held her."

"Could you have done both of those things by yourself?" Mark challenged, scooping a heaping amount of stuffing onto his plate. "Didn't think so."

Meredith fed Lilly a spoonful of pureed carrots, smiling when she happily accepted it. "Good girl," she praised. "Mark and Bridget are great with her. They're going to be amazing parents," she said, glancing over at Bridget, who smiled back at her.

"How was it going back to work? I remember it was so tough with all my kids," Liz said.

"It was hard. It still is. I hate being away from her. Derek's been so supportive, though. If he hadn't taken time off, there's no way I'd be able to finish residency on time," Meredith said. "And he brings Lilly up to the hospital nearly every day."

"She's such a good baby. She makes it easy," Derek said, giving Lilly a spoonful of peas. Lilly made a face as she gummed it around in her mouth, then spit it out. "Easy baby; not a fan of peas," he laughed.

Lilly rubbed the mushy peas all over her chin with her hand, and Meredith quickly reached for her napkin. "I think that's the first food she doesn't like. She's been such a good eater," she said as she gently wiped the excess off Lilly's face.

"Oh, that reminds me. Lilly needs to try some of the pumpkin pie I made. I remember how much Derek loved it when he was little. None of the girls liked it, but he couldn't get enough. So if she's anything like her father, she'll love it, too," Linda said.

"Ooh, how's the sound, Lilly? Want to try some pumpkin later on?" Meredith asked, laughing when Lilly smiled at her. "Okay, good. It's a plan."

"How has Adam been with his feedings, Ames? Any issues with the acid reflux?" Derek asked his sister, who held the baby against her chest with one hand and ate with the other.

Amy took a sip from her glass and nodded. "He's been great. We know all the tricks now, so he hasn't had a problem. He's such a mellow baby. And Kyle's been so great with him."

"You like being a big brother, buddy?" Mark asked the toddler, sitting in his booster seat between his parents.

"Uh huh! I share all my toys with him, and we watch _Yo Gabba Gabba_ together," Kyle said. "You like that show, right Aunt Meredith?"

Meredith smiled with as much enthusiasm as she could muster as she chewed on some turkey. "Mhm. Yeah. I love it," she said.

"We let Lilly watch it sometimes. She'll lie in her boppy seat on the couch and smile the whole time. Although, I gotta say she's way more interested in neurosurgery," Derek began before everyone around the table let out good-natured sighs, always ribbing him for being the brain man of the family.

"No, I'm serious. One night, Mer was watching one of her mom's old surgery tapes to prep for her tumor removal, and Lilly was obsessed. If it hadn't been close to her bedtime, she would've happily watched the whole thing," Derek boasted, letting Lilly try the string beans this time.

"As much as I hate to pump his ego, it's true," Mark vouched. "There was this one time when their shifts overlapped, and I offered to take Lilly while they scrubbed in on an emergency craniotomy. We sat in the gallery and she watched the whole thing on the TV monitor. Blood, brains, scalpels, everything. Never turned away. If it wasn't against the rules, I'd swear they'd bring her into the OR in one of those Swedish baby holder things."

"A Baby Björn," Derek corrected, giving Lilly a sip of her bottle. "And yes, we would."

...

Lilly fell asleep that night while she was still in the bathtub, not even waking when they dressed her. It had been another successful Shepherd Thanksgiving dinner, one that left everyone satiated and happy. Meredith could barely keep her eyes open as she lay on the bed, Lilly snoozing on her chest. The tryptophan from the turkey was getting the best of her, and she was fairly certain that without a caffeine injection, there's no way she'd have the energy to make good on her sex promise to Derek.

"Falling asleep?" Derek chuckled as he walked out of the adjoining bathroom after hanging Lilly's bath towel on the towel rack.

Meredith inhaled deeply as she stretched, the scent of Lilly's lavender baby lotion wafting to her nose. "Maybe," she admitted. "If you're willing to do all the work, we can still have sex. I already gave Bridget a heads up about watching Lilly for a while."

"I'm beat. Rain check for the morning?" Derek suggested, crawling in next to her in bed.

"Yes, please," Meredith agreed.

Derek rubbed his hand over Lilly's back. "Someone was tired, huh? She has to be exhausted to fall asleep in the tub. She loves it in there."

"She has a belly full of pumpkin pie," Meredith said, kissing the top of the baby's damp head. "Your Mom was right. She loves it as much as you did."

"I know. She was going to town on it. I wasn't sure how she'd be with some of the new foods she tried. Besides the peas, she loved it all," Derek said.

Meredith laughed. "Yeah, and what goes in must come out. Have fun with that diaper. My Thanksgiving gift to you."

"Hmm, maybe we'll get lucky and it'll happen tomorrow morning when we're having sex, and she just so happens to be with Mark and Bridget," Derek teased.

"Then we'd technically be getting lucky twice," Meredith pointed out. She splayed a hand over Lilly's back, and put the other on Derek's cheek before she kissed him. "I had a really good day."

"So did I. Thank you for coming with me to see my Dad. It's... that really means a lot to me."

"It meant a lot to me, too," Meredith said, moving her hand to the curls on the nape of his neck. "And do you know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you find a way to take all that pain you feel, and channel it into something good. You're the best dad Lilly could've ever hoped for. You even put your career on hold to make sure I could have mine. No one's ever done that for me before... you know, care about me like that. And you take such good care of Lilly. I meant what I said at dinner. I wouldn't have been able to do any of it without you. So even though you didn't really have your Dad growing up, I like to think he helped make you the man you are, and I'm grateful to him for that. He'd be so proud of you, Derek," Meredith said.

"Thank you, Mer," he said softly.

Derek smiled, watching how Lilly scrunched her nose in her sleep, exactly like Meredith did. Just has he leaned down to kiss the back of her head, Lilly let out a rumbling sound beneath her blanket, and Derek couldn't help but laugh, his lips against her dark hair. "Perfect timing as usual, Lilly."

"I'll start unsnapping her pajamas. You get the diaper supplies," Meredith laughed.

Derek swung his legs over the side of the bed. "Yep, on it."


	132. Holiday Season Kickoff

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows. The board review questions were borrowed from HCPLive. com and notes I found on Scridb. com, because there's no way I could have made them up myself.  
**

**So, so sorry for the wait! Please forgive me and enjoy the update!  
**

Thanksgiving was over and so, too, were the relaxing few days spent at Derek's mother's house. And now, it was December, one of the busiest times of the year with work and the upcoming Christmas holiday. Today was Saturday, and while they usually spent the day sleeping in, Meredith was determined to make the most of it, even if it meant dragging herself out of bed early after a night of naked fun with Derek.

Meredith stood in the shower, letting the warm water beat down on her back while she closed her eyes. She was fairly certain that if she were to snuggle up on the floor of the tub, she could easily fall asleep. But instead of risking drowning just to take a quick catnap, she reached for her soap. Just as she was about to squirt some onto her loofah, the bathroom door opened.

"Mer?" Derek said loud enough so that she could hear him over the water.

"Yeah?"

"There's poop everywhere!" he said.

This caught her attention, and she poked her head out of the curtain. "What?" she asked. "Uh oh."

"I went to change her diaper, and she decided to roll over. The damage was done before I could stop it," Derek said amusedly, holding a very messy, naked Lilly at arms' length.

"Lilly, what did you do?" Meredith asked, setting her sponge back in the caddy. "Let me take her. It'll be easier than getting her tub set up since I'm already in here. I'll just rinse her off."

Derek passed Lilly into Meredith's arms, and she held her away from the water spray. "I don't know if it's too warm for her. Can you turn the knob a little?" Meredith asked, unable to keep from smiling as Lilly smiled at her. "Oh, you think this is funny, huh?"

"I think she does," Derek chuckled as he made the water slightly cooler for Lilly's sensitive baby skin. Afterward, he got clean washcloth from the shelf and put a dollop of Lilly's soap on it. "Here, I'll leave this in the caddy for when you're done rinsing her off. I'm gonna go clean up her changing table."

"Okay."

Meredith held Lilly under her tiny arms and spun to face the water. "Okay, we need to clean the icky-ness off of you," she said, letting the water spray rinse off the back of Lilly's body. Lilly looked around with curiosity, knowing she was safe in her mom's arms.

"Is this fun, Lilly?" Meredith asked, making sure no water dripped into the baby's eyes. "You know, when you're a teenager, you're going to be mortified when Daddy and I reminisce about stuff like this," she giggled.

Once she was satisfied that Lilly's back and bottom were clean, Meredith gently lathered Lilly with the sudsy washcloth Derek had given her. She noticed her razor holder sitting near the opposite corner of the tub, which had probably been knocked off its suction cup base last night when she and Derek were doing the bendy thing. Meredith laughed in spite of herself. Ten hours ago, they were having wild, steamy sex; and now, she was in that same shower, washing off her messy baby.

Meredith leaned in and kissed Lilly's nose. "You make life so interesting, peanut."

"How are we doing? All clean?" Derek asked as he reentered the bathroom a few minutes later.

"Yeah, just washing the soap off of her," Meredith said, smoothing Lilly's wet hair off her forehead. She turned Lilly from front to back in her arms to survey her work before pulling back the shower curtain slightly. "Here you go. One squeaky clean baby."

Derek wrapped a towel around Lilly and kissed her cheek. "That's much better," he said. "Okay, let's go get you dressed so Mommy can finish her shower."

"Thank you," Meredith said with a smile, which only grew when she noticed Derek tracking her wet, naked body from head to toe. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you have me pinned against the shower wall with my legs wrapped around your waist," Meredith said. "This shower is actually about showering."

Derek tucked Lilly's feet into the towel, smirking as he walked toward the bathroom door. "Maybe right now. But last night? Last night was hot."

Meredith laughed, closing the shower curtain. "Yes, it was."

...

"Mmm, open up, Lilly," Meredith said, waving the spoonful of pureed peaches toward Lilly, who sat in her high chair next to the kitchen table. Lilly opened her mouth and happily munched on her breakfast.

"I can't believe she actually fits in that high chair now," Derek said from the chair on the opposite side of Meredith's. "Remember when she couldn't even hold her head up, or would just flop over on the couch?"

"I know," Meredith said, frowning slightly. She wiped the excess peaches off Lilly's chin with the spoon and scooped them back into her mouth. "She's gonna be six months old on Monday. Do you know how much that makes me want to cry?"

"I know. Me, too."

"So you're sure you don't mind watching her today? I can bring her to Iz's with me," Meredith said.

"You and your friends all managed to get today off to study for your boards. I want you to be able to go," Derek said in support. "Lilly and I can entertain ourselves for a few hours."

"Thank you," Meredith replied, giving Lilly another spoonful. "And later on when we're both home, I was thinking we could decorate the fake tree we bought. The photographer is coming in a couple days for Lilly's six month-slash-Christmas pictures, and I want to have the house decorated."

"I still can't believe you talked me into buying that thing," Derek laughed, shaking his head. "We own twenty acres of beautiful Seattle land full of trees. Gotta tell you, it feels blasphemous."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "I know; you gave me the same speech in the checkout line at the store," she reminded him. "But we can get a real tree, too. The fake one is really just for Lilly's portraits. If we put a real tree up now, it would die before Christmas."

"You want two trees?"

"Why not? We have the room. Maybe we can move the fake one into the dining room, and when we get a real one in a week or two, we can put that one in the living room. The real one can be our Christmas morning tree," Meredith compromised with him.

"We can do that," Derek agreed.

"See? Win-win," Meredith said, watching as Lilly opened her mouth for more food, then giving her another bite. "Lilly doesn't care about the tree situation. All she wants are these peaches."

"If she could talk, she'd be on my side about the tree. Wouldn't you, Lilly?" Derek joked, taking a sip of his coffee. The beeping of his pager interrupted the conversation, and he picked it up off the table. "Fourth floor nurses' station," he said, reaching for his phone in his pocket.

"Uh oh," Meredith told Lilly, as she waited to hear the news of whatever the nurse on the other end of Derek's phone was saying.

When he hung up the phone a minute later, he sighed. "I need to go in. Mrs. Rossman's shunt isn't draining, and I don't want it to get backed up and risk an infection," Derek said. "I would have a resident take care of it, but she has scar tissue from her last shunt placement, so I'd rather do it myself."

Meredith wiped Lilly's chin with her snowflake bib. "That's okay. I don't mind taking Lilly with me. How long do you think you'll be?"

"No more than a few hours, so I'll just meet you and Lilly back here and we can decorate," Derek said as he finished off the last of his coffee.

"Okay."

Derek kissed the top of her head before walking over to the counter. "Are you sure you don't mind? What about Lexie? If she's off, I'm sure she'd watch her for us," he suggested, putting his coffee mug in the sink.

"She's helping us study. Her memory is like a search engine, so we figured it might be useful having her around," Meredith said as she offered Lilly a sip from her bottle. "Really, Derek, I don't mind. You took time off from work so I could finish my residency on time. I don't want you to miss your surgery."

Derek looked at her hesitantly, and Meredith pointed Lilly's spoon at him. "Don't make me play the guilt card. I'll do it."

"Fine, I'll go in," he said, watching Meredith's lips curl into a smile. "So bossy, Mrs. Shepherd."

"Take that back," Meredith warned playfully.

Derek leaned in and kissed Lilly's cheek just as she turned her head toward him, getting her peach-covered lips all over his own. "Mmm, guess I deserved that," he chuckled.

Meredith smiled in satisfaction, handing him a napkin. "Yes, you did."

...

When Izzie saw Meredith walking up the front steps of the old house, holding Lilly in her car seat, she held the door open for her in welcome. "Hey, Mer," Izzie greeted. "Hi, pretty baby."

"Hey, Iz," Meredith said as she walked into the house, then turned left toward the living room. "Derek got paged into work, so Lilly is going to help us study."

"Hi, Lilly," George said happily, waving to the baby after Meredith set the car seat down. He got up off the couch to unbuckle her. "Look how big you are. You look just like your Mommy. Yes you do."

Alex walked into the living room with a half-eaten donut, smiling when he saw Lilly. "Mini Mer is here."

"She missed you guys, so I figured I'd bring her by for a visit. That, and Derek is in surgery," Meredith said as she shimmied off her coat.

"Well, she would've been here on Thanksgiving, but you bailed to go visit McDreamy's perfect-haired relatives," Cristina joked.

"Yes, but you'll see her on Christmas," Meredith appeased her. "And hey, Alex, early gift for you. You're going into peds., so Lilly can be your pretend practice patient."

Alex dropped down on the couch and shoveled the last of his donut into his mouth. "Score," he said excitedly.

"Hey, no fair," Cristina protested.

"Sorry. I couldn't find any pretend cardio patients for you on the way over," Meredith said sarcastically, putting Lilly's coat in her car seat after George took it off of her. "But you _can_ spend some quality time with your goddaughter."

Lilly reached her hand toward George's face and babbled at him. "Oh, you don't say?" George played along.

"Listen to that little voice! Does she do that a lot?" Lexie asked, sitting down next to George so she could make a fuss over Lilly, too.

"Yeah, she babbles all day long. We had a very interesting conversation on the way over," Meredith giggled as she pulled her prep books from her bag. "Sometimes, when she wakes up from her naps, Derek and I just listen to her over the monitor. It's so adorable."

Cristina rolled her eyes, already flipping through her note cards in preparation for studying. "Am I the only one who wants to pass my boards?" she asked.

"It's 9:30 in the morning, Cristina. It's also December. We have until June," Izzie reminded her.

"Fine, let's do this. I'll start. Lexipedia, find me a peds. case," Alex said.

Lexie picked up the stack of color coded papers with all the pediatric surgery cases, searching until she found an interesting one. "Okay, a three year old female is placed under anesthesia for a hernia repair. After ten minutes, the patient's temperature spikes to 104. She's becoming tachycardic, and has diffuse muscle rigidity. What would be the most effective treatment for this situation?"

"I'd dose her with dantrolene sodium to block the calcium release causing the symptoms, and I'd stop the surgery and go back in once she stabilized," Alex said confidently.

"Correct," Lexie said, giving Alex one point on the white board chart under his name.

"Okay, I'm next," Cristina said impatiently.

"What? Why?" George asked.

"We're going in alphabetical order," Cristina said, pointing to the board. "Don't blame me; blame Lexie. She's the one who made the chart."

"Sorry, I was just trying to be organized," Lexie said through her yawn. She took a sip of her coffee and set it on the table. "I was on-call until two in the morning. You're lucky I showed up at all."

"You're a walking medical library. We need you here," Meredith said. "Besides, just think of all you're learning. You get to start studying for your boards a year in advance."

"Exactly. You help us. We help you. Now give me a question," Cristina said.

"Fine. A thirty-six year old male comes into the ER after an MVC. His chest X-ray shows a widened mediastinum. An aortogram shows a descending thoracic aortic injury. He also has a grade II splenic injury. What would be the _wrong_ approach in repairing the aortic injury?" Lexie read off the flashcard.

"I would want to avoid a total cardiopulmonary bypass with systemic heparinization because he would be at high risk of life-threatening bleeding. There are several approaches I would consider before operating, and would ultimately choose the one that was in the best interest of my patient," Cristina spouted off easily.

"Jeez, you're like a robot," Izzie said.

Cristina smiled, watching as Lexie gave her a point. "Thank you."

"Okay, George, you're up," Lexie said, choosing another card. "A fifty year old woman who has a lump at the base of her neck was found to have a two centimeter nodule in the right lower lobe of the thyroid gland. Needle aspiration showed follicular cells. What would you advise as the next step in her treatment?"

George bounced Lilly on his knee as he answered. "The cells may indicate either a benign follicular adenoma or a follicular carcinoma, so making a preoperative diagnosis may not be possible. I'd schedule a hemithyroidectomy to see what kind of cells were pulled from the aspiration, and then consider the surgical options if that's necessary."

"Very good," Lexie said, marking down a point for George.

He tapped his palm against the baby's. "High five, Lilly."

"Eww, she drooled all over your pants," Cristina said, pointing to the wet spot on the knee of George's jeans.

"Oops. Sorry. We think she's starting to teethe a little, so there's been drool everywhere lately," Meredith said as she handed George a few tissues.

"That's okay. It's just spit. And it's baby spit, so it's cute," George told Lilly as he wiped her chin. Lilly saw Meredith sitting on the opposite couch, and smiled as she reached her little hands out. "Okay, back to Mommy," he said.

"Come here, Lillybug," Meredith said, letting Lilly lay on her chest after George handed her over. "She got up early with Derek, so she's probably tired. And we had a poop emergency, so that made the morning extra eventful."

"Eww," Cristina repeated.

Meredith felt Lilly's warmth as she rested on her chest. "All part of being a parent. I don't mind the poop," she said, kissing the top of Lilly's head. "Okay, Izzie's turn."

"Okay, a football player injures his knee after being tackled and is taken to the ER. His anterior drawer test comes back positive, and the foot of his injured leg is slightly cooler than the uninjured foot. His dorsalis pedis pulses are palpable but still weak. What would you advise as a treatment plan?" Lexie asked.

"Knee dislocation is often associated with popliteal vascular trauma, so without prompt surgical treatment, the rate of amputation can increase by fifty percent. I would do an arteriogram to rule out popliteal artery injury," Izzie answered.

"Correct," Lexie said, giving Izzie a point.

"You really know your ortho stuff," Meredith complimented, trailing her fingers up and down Lilly's back.

"Ortho is the bane of my existence. It shouldn't even be allowed in board interviews," Cristina said decidedly before pulling out a handful of cereal from the box on her lap.

"You're gonna owe me a new box of cereal, Yang," Alex said, watching as she ate all the raisins in her hand, then proceeded to dump the brain back into the box.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "It's cereal. Don't fight," she said.

"Okay, Mer's turn," Lexie said, reaching for her stack of neuro cards. "Yours comes with a picture."

Lexie handed Meredith a CT print that had been reduced in size, and Meredith began studying it before Lexie even read the question. "Okay, Lilly. Watch Mommy kick some neuro A-S-S."

"A sixty-four year old man presents with left-sided headache and slurred speech. Based on the provided CT scan of the man's brain, what would likely be found upon a physical examination?" Lexie asked.

Meredith carefully reviewed the CT scan, going over it in great detail the same way she had since day one. She didn't speak until she was certain of the answer. "After completing a physical examination, I would most likely find that the patient has contralateral hemiparesis, as well as a restricted lateral gaze. These combined symptoms are most often found in people with Millard Gubler syndrome, which can lead to abducens and facial nerve paralysis, and in some cases, hemiplegia of the extremities."

"Damn it. Mer's giving you a run for your money, Lexie," Izzie said.

"Her mother is Ellis Freaking Grey. Were we really expecting her to _not_ kick all of our asses?" Alex said, reaching for the cereal box Cristina had stolen.

"She's also sleeping with the professor," Cristina said.

"He's my husband. And yes, he helps me study whenever we have time," Meredith shrugged.

"Something tells me this story has a porny ending that I'd rather not hear about," Lexie winced, giving Meredith a point on the board.

Meredith laughed. "We have a six month old. Most of the studying happens while I'm nursing. Or when we're giving Lilly a bath. Or when we fold piles of baby laundry together. Not everything we do involves nudity."

"A lot of it does," Cristina murmured with her coffee cup against her lips.

Meredith cocked her head. "Cristina."

"What? It's true," Cristina upheld.

"Fine. It's true," Meredith admitted, knowing it would be a futile attempt to deny it. "Now, can this conversation steer away from my sex life and back to surgery?"

Lilly smiled up at Meredith with her thumb in her mouth, and Meredith patted her little bottom. "You, me, and Daddy? Neurosurgical dream team."

When three o'clock rolled around, and the study session ended, Lexie had quizzed them on an upwards of two hundred questions. Meredith had outscored the others by nine points, and her brain felt like it had just run a marathon: sated, energized, and accomplished all rolled into one.

She walked through the front door with Lilly, letting Charlie run his usual circles around her legs. "Hi, buddy," she said.

"Hey," Derek said as he came into the foyer.

"Hey," Meredith echoed. "When did you get home?"

"Half hour ago," Derek said.

Meredith stood on her tiptoes to kiss him. "How was your surgery?"

"I fixed the shunt; no complications. Mrs. Rossman woke up smiling," Derek said, taking Lilly from Meredith and kissing her cheek. "How'd studying go?"

"Good. All of our hard work is paying off. You're a very good teacher," Meredith said.

"Making the boards your B-I-T-C-H?" Derek chuckled, recalling what she'd said to him a few days ago when he was helping her study.

Meredith giggled as she shimmied her coat off and put it on the hook. "Yes, I am," she said. "In fact, the others asked me to convince you to do a group tutoring thing for neuro practice."

"Seriously?" Derek asked, taking off Lilly's coat.

"I gave good answers. Detailed and thorough, like we practiced," Meredith said.

He leaned in and kissed Meredith's neck, smiling against her skin. "Hmm, it's good to be thorough."

"Yes, you're very good at that," Meredith couldn't help but moan. When Lilly babbled up at them, she quickly regained her composure. "You can be thorough later. You know, when our daughter isn't sandwiched between us."

"How thorough are we talking?" Derek asked, regretfully pulling away.

Meredith covered Lilly's ears with her hands. "We'll get naked, and you can do whatever you want."

"Alright, then," he grinned.

Meredith noticed the boxes of Christmas decorations on the floor after they walked into the living room, and she spun on her heels to face him. "You already brought the stuff upstairs?" she asked, smiling at him.

"Yeah, I figured I'd get a head start when I got home from work," Derek said, laying Lilly in her swing. After buckling her, he kissed her forehead. "There you go. Front row to watch us decorate. Which is basically just Mommy bossing me around like last time."

Meredith laughed, kneeling down and popping open one of the boxes. "Hey, I was pregnant last Christmas. And you were worried every time you saw me lift a laundry basket. You probably would've had a heart attack if I used the step ladder to string the lights," she said in her own defense.

"Fine. I guess you had a good excuse," Derek teased, peering into the ornament box Meredith had opened. He pulled out the tiny, pink _Baby's First Christmas_ ball they'd purchased last Christmas and showed Lilly. "Look, Princess. We bought this for you last year. You even have a pink stocking that we hung up between ours."

"You were the size of this ornament, but you were already celebrating Christmas with us. Just from inside my belly," Meredith added. Lilly studied the Christmas ball with her curious blue eyes, making little suckling sounds with her thumb in her mouth.

Derek pushed the large tree box into the center of the living room with a grunt, dropping onto the floor next to it. "May as well set up the tree first. That'll probably take the longest," he said, finding a corner of tape and peeling it up from one end of the box to the other.

"Want me to help you assemble it?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah. You might need to sit on my shoulders when we reach the top," Derek joked.

"Would that help make up for the fake tree I suckered you into getting?"

"Little bit," Derek admitted.

Lilly reached for them from her swing, and Meredith laughed. "Do you want to join in on the fun?" she asked. She walked over to the swing, and took Lilly out, then scanned the living room. "Her boppy seat is upstairs. Can you hold her while I get it?"

"Yeah," Derek said, setting a tree branch aside so Meredith could put Lilly on his lap. When he reached over to grab direction booklet with one hand, he noticed how Lilly remained sitting up without leaning against his front, and he smiled. "Wow. This is an interesting development. Can you sit on the floor? Let's try," he said.

He sat Lilly on the rug in front of him, keeping his arms near her sides in case she wasn't steady enough and tipped. But when she simply sat there unsupported like it was no big deal, the grin on his face only grew. "Look at you! You're such a big girl!"

Meredith came back down the steps and into the living room holding the boppy seat, stopping mid-step when she saw Lilly. "Lilly!" she gasped. "You're sitting up all by yourself!"

"She was sitting on my lap pretty much on her own, so I figured I'd test it out. She didn't even wobble," Derek said proudly.

Meredith rejoined them on the floor, putting her hands on Lilly's cheeks and kissing her forehead. "What did I say about growing up too fast?" she joked.

"She likes to surprise us," Derek chuckled, handing Lilly her stocking to keep her entertained. "Now when she gets her pictures taken, we won't have to put something behind her. She can just model for us."

"Ooh, I didn't even think of that. Good timing, Peanut," Meredith praised.

"She has a surgeon's posture. Good for standing at the OR table and fixing brains one day, right?" Derek asked Lilly, tapping his palm against hers for a high five. "My nieces and nephews started crawling soon after they could sit on their own. I have a feeling she'll be crawling by January," Derek said.

"Yeah?" Meredith asked, her mommy instincts getting the best of her when he put the boppy seat around Lilly anyway. "You're still a big girl. I just don't want you to tip in case we can't catch you in time."

Lilly didn't mind, though; instead, she just put the fuzzy top of her stocking into her mouth and started chewing happily, watching as her parents removed all of the tree branches from the box.

By the time Derek noticed, all he could do was laugh. "Uh oh. Lilly has a stocking full of drool," he said. He gently took it from her and wiped the wetness off of it with his pants, then checked the tag on the inside. "Hand wash only. Should we just toss it in the tub with you tonight?" he joked.

"Poor baby. I think one of her bottom teeth is going to pop up soon," Meredith said, rubbing her finger along Lilly's gums. "I don't think it's hurting her too much yet. She's just been chewing on everything."

"I put a banana in the freezer this morning. I'll go get it for her," Derek said, getting up off the floor.

"We're never going to get this tree set up, are we?" Meredith giggled.

Derek turned around as he walked into the kitchen, smirking at her. "That's not necessarily a bad thing."

"It's going to look just like a real one! You'll see!" Meredith challenged. She tickled the bottom of Lilly's socked foot. "There's no reasoning with a stubborn, perfect-haired nature man, Lillybug."

...

Three hours later, with good teamwork and Lilly's cooperation, the house decorating was completed: tree, mantle, fireplace, and lights, all finished. Derek lay on the couch with his head resting on Meredith's lap, surveying their work.

"It looks like Whoville in here," he said, glancing up at her. "But I admit, the tree looks pretty. If I didn't know it was fake, I wouldn't know it was fake."

"Told you."

Derek smiled, looking at Lilly. She laid in her swing, mesmerized by the twinkling lights and how the tree rotated slowly. "Lilly loves it. She hasn't taken her eyes off the lights since we lit them."

"It is really relaxing to watch," Meredith said as she smoothed her fingers through his hair.

Derek closed his eyes, reveling in the feeling of her fingers on his scalp. "Between the lights and you running your fingers through my hair, I'm not sure I'll be awake long enough to have the sex you promised me."

"Do you want me to stop?" she asked.

"No."

"Once Lilly falls asleep, we could put her in the bassinet upstairs, then have sex next to the fireplace," she suggested.

"And we can still get naked, and I can do whatever I want to you?" Derek asked.

Meredith leaned down and kissed him. "You held up your end of the bargain and built the tree; so yeah, I think that's only fair."


	133. Christmas Pictures

**Disclaimer: I don't own TV shows.**

**As always, thank you a thousand times for your patience! It means so much to me!  
**

The bedroom was dark, still free of any streaks of the barely risen sun. The time on the clock said 5:47, which meant there was just over an hour before the alarm was set to sound. But Lilly had other plans. Since she began teething, the days had been starting earlier, and her little cries of discomfort had been taking place of the alarm clock.

Derek heard his daughter crying first, and he pulled himself from sleep so Meredith wouldn't have to. She had back to back surgeries scheduled today, and he wanted her to get as much rest as she could. Derek rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms, then scooped Lilly into his arm.

"Good morning, baby girl. Do your gums hurt?" he whispered.

Lilly curled into his chest and sniffled, and Derek patted her diapered bottom. "I know," he soothed. "Let's go downstairs and get a teething ring, so Mommy can sleep."

Meredith's eyes blinked open tiredly, and she looked at the two of them. "Hmm, hey. Is she okay?"

"She's fine. Just needs a teething ring. Go back to sleep," Derek said softly.

"M'kay," Meredith murmured, closing her eyes again.

Derek swung his legs over the side of the bed and padded out of their bedroom, down the hall, then descended the stairs. Lilly looked up at him with her tired blue eyes that matched his.

"Rough way to start a morning, huh? I think I'd rather be woken up by the alarm than by sore gums."

Lilly babbled something back to him, stretching her tiny limbs. Even at six in the morning, her sweet, little voice was enough to perk him up, and he smiled at her. "You said it," he teased, walking into the kitchen.

After taking a teething ring from the fridge, he went back into the living room. The house was still dark, but somehow, Derek managed to find the switch for the Christmas tree rotator and lights, and he turned it on. He and Lilly both blinked when the room was illuminated by the twinkling of the tree.

"You know, one of Mommy's favorite things to do is lie under the Christmas tree and look up at it. Now, she and I do that every year. I would lie under it with you, but that seems dangerous to do with a six month old," Derek said, lying down on the couch with Lilly sprawled on top of him, her cheek resting on his chest.

"Here, you can chew on this," Derek said, offering her the teething ring. He put it between her gums, and Lilly scrunched her face in disapproval. He laughed at the little wrinkles on her forehead as he took it out. "Too cold still? Where does it hurt?"

Derek ran his finger along Lilly's bottom gums and felt how hard they were getting, a sure sign that a tooth was going to pop up any day now. Before he could remove his finger, Lilly was already holding it in place with her hand and began chewing lightly on it. Her uncomfortable whimpers dissipated, and she focused her attention on the tree as though she were watching a movie.

Derek chuckled, putting his free hand over Lilly's back. "Whatever works. You can keep it there all day long if you need to."

It wasn't long before Derek noticed Lilly's eyelids getting heavy, and he kissed the top of her dark head of hair. "You can go back to sleep. Daddy's got you, Lillybug," he said before yawning. "In fact, how about we both go to sleep?"

Mere minutes passed before they both did.

And they were still sleeping when Meredith eventually came downstairs a little while later, dressed and ready for work. She smiled when she saw the two of them sound asleep on the couch. It was moments like this that made her wish her residency was finished, that she could go put her pajamas back on and curl up next to her husband and daughter. She loved her job, and knew that the grueling schedule and all of the early mornings would be worth it when she officially became an attending in July, but ever since having Lilly, pulling out of the driveway every day was a challenge.

Meredith took the blanket from the top of the couch and gently draped it over them. Just as she was closing the curtains to keep out any sunlight, Derek shuffled slightly under the blanket, craning his neck toward her.

"Hey," he whispered.

"Hi. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," Meredith said just as softly, sitting down on the coffee table. "You both look so comfy."

"It's okay. I like saying goodbye before you leave," Derek said. "When's your shift over today?"

Meredith checked her watch. "I start at eight. I'm hoping to be home by three. I'm doing a cranial nerve reconstruction with Mark. He knows we're getting Lilly's pictures done, so he'll let me go early."

"Hmm, using the good old Lilly name drop?" Derek joked.

"Hey, it works. Not my fault he turns to goo when we bring her up," Meredith pointed out. "Oh, and if she's fussy around lunchtime and won't take a bottle, you can bring her up to the hospital if you want. I like nursing her during my break, anyway."

Derek nodded. "Okay, I'll see how she's feeling."

Meredith smiled when she noticed Derek's finger in Lilly's mouth. "How long has she been holding your finger hostage?"

"Almost two hours. It's numb," Derek chuckled.

Meredith ran her fingers through his hair, smoothing it away from his forehead. "You're a good daddy," she said. "Thank you for letting me sleep."

"I wanted you to."

"Well, I appreciate it," Meredith said. "So do you think we should cancel her pictures? I know it's just teething and she's not actually sick; I just don't want her to feel crummy."

"Nah, she'll be fine. Once she wakes up and has some breakfast, I'll give her some baby Tylenol. That always knocks the pain out. By the time you get home, she'll be her bright and shiny self," Derek promised.

Meredith laughed softly. "Okay."

When she made no motion to move, Derek cocked his head and smiled. "Really don't want to go to work, huh?" he guessed.

"No," she sighed, scrunching her nose.

"How about we come visit you anyway, whether she's fussy or not? Maybe it'll help break up the day a little," Derek offered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Lilly and I can sit in the gallery and watch your surgery, then we can go have lunch in my office, so you can nurse. She loves the hospital," Derek said, rubbing Lilly's back with his hand.

Meredith smiled. "She gets that from me. My mom got me a suture kit for my birthday, and the nurses always had fruit baskets being delivered to them, so they'd give me bananas and kiwis and stuff. I'd sit in the gallery all day slicing fruit and stitching it back up. I could out-suture most of the interns by the time I was six."

"That'll be Lilly in a few years. Only, you know, without the..." Derek stalled as he tried to come up with the right words.

"Complete parental neglect?" Meredith offered, laughing in spite of herself.

Derek nodded in agreement. "I was trying to be tactful, but yeah, that sums it up."

"Yeah, well my mother wasn't exactly the tactful type," Meredith pointed out. She leaned in and pressed a kiss to Lilly's cheek. "But don't worry; that'll never, ever happen to you. I'll see you at lunch, okay? Mommy loves you, Lilly." She handed Derek the remote and kissed him again. "Here you go. Just in case she stays asleep on you for a while and you get bored."

"Good thinking; thanks."

"You do realize how jealous I am right now, right?" Meredith joked.

"Yeah, I got that," Derek said, smiling apologetically.

Meredith smirked. "Good."

...

The automatic doors of the hospital opened with a swoosh, letting Derek and Lilly pass through. Derek smiled at the familiarity of Seattle Grace, one that he had become so accustomed to since he began working there. But every time someone asked if he missed coming to work full time, with the hustle and bustle of back to back surgeries, he always gave the honest answer: no.

As much as he loved his job, and enjoyed coming to work a couple days a week as opposed to the normal six or seven, the OR wasn't nearly as important to him as Meredith and Lilly were. Meredith deserved the chance to finish her residency on time, and Lilly deserved stability. If he could ensure both of those things, being a part time surgeon for a while was a small sacrifice.

Derek bounced Lilly in one arm, and held a paper bag with lunch in the other. He spotted the Chief paying for a cup of coffee at the coffee cart, and flagged him down. "Chief," he called out.

Richard turned around, smiling from ear to ear when he saw the two of them. "Derek. It's good to see you," he greeted, reaching for Lilly's hand to shake it. "You too, little lady. How are you?"

"She's good. We're going through the teething woes, but she's a trooper," Derek bragged as they walked across the main lobby toward the elevator. "Would you like to hold her?"

"Of course," Richard said eagerly, swapping his coffee for Derek to hold, so he could take Lilly. He hugged her and let her sit in his arm. "I remember when Meredith was teething. The only thing that helped her was frozen bananas. She loved them," he said nostalgically, like a father talking about his daughter.

"Lilly, too. Our freezer is stocked with them," Derek said.

The Chief smiled down at Lilly. "You're just like your Mommy," he said, stepping onto the elevator with Derek.

"She really is. Mer says she looks like me, but everything she does reminds me so much of her. They make the same facial expressions. They both scrunch their noses the same way. Lilly doesn't even have teeth yet, but she still bites her lip. She loves surgery, too. We're on our way to the gallery to watch Mer finish up in OR 2."

"I think it's fair to say the surgery gene came from both of you," Richard said. "Is Meredith on call tonight?"

"No, just until this afternoon. We're actually having a photographer come to the house to take Lilly's six month pictures, so it's gonna be a Christmasy theme. Should be fun," Derek said.

Richard smiled. "Hard to believe that she's six months old."

"I know. I remember getting her six month sonogram pictures, and I couldn't believe how big she looked in those. Now, Meredith and I joke that she's practically an adult."

"One day, she'll take over the Chief of Surgery position," Richard said, chuckling when Lilly reached for the penlight in his coat pocket. "See, she's already a natural."

"You can hold the spot for her for the next thirty years. Probably less. She's a genius," Derek boasted again, just as they stepped off the elevator onto the surgical floor.

"Or maybe, she could take over for you," Richard said.

Derek stopped and turned to the Chief. "Me?"

"I'm not gonna be here forever, Shep. One day, someone else will be sitting behind that desk. You're the only one I'd consider for it," the Chief said in a way that told Derek he was serious, and not simply offering the job as a compliment.

"Chief, I..." Derek said, before Richard cut him off.

"I'm not saying it's going to be tomorrow. It may not be for a few years," he said, sensing Derek's hesitation. "But let's face it. I'm not getting any younger. If I don't step down, I'll eventually get pushed off. We both know that. All I'm saying is think about it."

They reached the steps to the gallery, and Richard kissed Lilly's forehead before handing her back to Derek. "It was so nice to see you, Miss Lilly. Now you go have fun watching your Mom save a life. She's very good at that, and you will be, too."

"Thank you, sir. Good seeing you," Derek said.

"You, too," Richard replied, giving a polite nod and excusing himself when Patricia waved him down with a stack of paperwork.

Derek adjusted Lilly in his arm and walked up the steps that led into the OR gallery. "Teething advice _and_ a job offer. A lot can happen between the lobby and the OR, huh?"

Lilly babbled up at him, and Derek smiled. "My thoughts exactly," he said. "Okay, let's go watch Mommy and Uncle Mark repair facial nerves. I reserved us front row seats."

The gallery was nearly empty, only two residents sitting in the back row taking notes and sipping coffee. Derek smiled at both of them, then walked over to the intercom, pressing the 'on' button. "Guess who's here," he said into the speaker.

Meredith and Mark glanced up at the gallery, both smiling under their masks. "Hi, baby girl!" Meredith said happily, waving up at them with her free hand.

Lilly smiled excitedly when she heard Meredith's voice, and her eyes were immediately drawn to her down in the OR. Derek held her closer to the glass so she would have a better view. "Isn't that neat, Princess? You've been in the OR since before you born. You spent nine months at the OR table inside Mommy."

"You sure she's not gonna get nightmares from seeing this guy's face peeled off?" Mark asked over the intercom.

Derek shook his head. "She doesn't know what she's looking at. If she were a toddler, I wouldn't bring her anywhere near it," he said, grinning from ear to ear when he saw how invested Lilly was.

"Gotta admit, she pays more attention than most interns do," Mark said. "Okay, Lilly. Watch your mom anastomose the hypoglossal nerve to the facial nerve."

Meredith looked at him with wide eyes. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. Show off for your kid," Mark insisted, handing Meredith line of suture.

Derek and Lilly watched from the gallery as Meredith put her natural talent to work, connecting the nerves with all the delicacy and precision of a world-class surgeon. He kissed the top of Lilly's head and smiled, full of pride and awe.

"Mommy's the coolest, isn't she?"

...

It was a quarter to four, fifteen minutes before Megan, the photographer, was set to arrive. Meredith walked down the steps with Lilly, who was dolled up in her red dress, white tights, and pigtails with tiny, red bows. All signs pointed to smooth sailing now that Lilly's teething troubles had seemed to subside, and both of her parents hoped that things stayed that way for the next hour.

Meredith set Lilly in the corner of the couch, making sure her dress was wrinkle-free. "There we go. Now we just need you to sit still until the nice picture lady gets here," she said as Lilly grabbed at the hem of her dress. "I wish you were old enough to bribe."

Derek walked into the living room from the kitchen, grinning when he saw his daughter. "You look so beautiful, Lillybug."

"Thanks to the curly Shepherd hair she inherited, there was more than enough for pigtails, so I went for it," Meredith said.

"I love them. See, wasn't all of that pregnancy heartburn worth it for that great head of hair?" Derek teased.

Meredith ribbed him with her elbow. "Funny," she said wryly. "But yeah, it kinda was."

"That's all I'm saying," he said. He knelt down and pushed the coffee table off to the side, so they could take pictures in front of the fireplace like they wanted. "So, I was thinking we could put Charlie in a few, too. Maybe have Lilly lean against him or something."

"Oh, I'd like that," Meredith said. "Megan said we could do a few outfit changes. There were some samples online that were really cute. She provides all the props for home shoots, too. Bailey uses her for Tuck's birthday pictures every year."

"If Bailey vouches for her, she must be good," Derek said, catching some drool on Lilly's chin before it could get on her dress. "We're gonna get some good pictures today, right Lilly?"

Lilly blew bubbles with her mouth, giggling when one of them popped, and Meredith smiled as she wiped the baby's lips. "The Tylenol must have kicked in if she's laughing at spit-up."

There was a short knock at the door, and Derek rose to his feet. "Guess that's her," he said.

Meredith scooped Lilly off the couch, following Derek to the door. The woman on the other side of the glass looked to be around thirty, with blonde hair and glasses, who had a rolling suitcase next to her and two large bags slung over her shoulder.

Derek stepped to the side and held the door open for her. "Come on in. Thanks for trekking all the way out here. We know it's a bit of a drive."

"No, it's no trouble at all. I'm Megan. It's so nice to meet you. Meredith and Derek, right?" Megan said, shaking both of their hands. She smiled at Lilly and gave her hand a tiny shake. "And you must be Lilly."

"Yep. She's all ready for you," Derek said, bouncing her in his arm.

"She's gorgeous," Megan complimented.

"Thank you."

"Did you have anything in mind for today's shoot?" Megan asked.

Meredith nodded. "She's almost six months old, so we wanted to do Christmas pictures to send out."

"Aww, summer baby?" Megan asked.

"June 5th. She's an almost-summer baby," Derek chuckled, noticing how Lilly looked with interest at all of the photographer's equipment. "Doesn't this look like fun, Princess?"

Meredith stood in front of Lilly and gave her a quick scan, making sure her hair and dress were neat, and there was no food on her face. Satisfied, she kissed Lilly's forehead. "Perfect," she said.

Derek tickled Lilly's belly with his finger, and the baby broke out in her usual giggles. "There's the smile we need."

"Babies are much more comfortable in their own homes. I tend to get a lot more laughs and smiles when they're in familiar surroundings. She'll do great," Megan assured them. "You can browse through the sample book I brought for ideas. We can sit her in a wrapped gift box; or we can tangle her up in some Christmas lights with some over-sized Christmas balls scattered around her; maybe we can do some with her in leg warmers and a knit snow hat."

"All of those sound really cute," Meredith said as she and Derek flipped through the album of photos.

"We can do them all, if you'd like. Your daughter is so cute that I might just need to put her in my sample book," Megan said, loading a new roll of film into the camera. "Are you thinking of doing them in front of the fireplace?"

"Yeah. Maybe some in front of the tree, too. She loves the Christmas tree," Derek said. He set Lilly in front of the fireplace, making sure she could support herself sitting up. "There we go. Good job."

"Sure, we can get some tree pictures. You're my last appointment for today, so I'll stay as long as you want me to," Megan offered. She turned toward Lilly and smiled warmly at her. "Are you ready for your photo shoot, Lilly?"

Lilly looked up curiously at the three of them. Normally, her afternoons were spent nursing with her mom or watching her dad cook dinner, or going up to the big, fancy place where they worked, so people could make a fuss over her. So, sitting in front of the fireplace in a frilly dress with some shiny, black thing pointed at her was a little strange. But her parents seemed to celebrate every time she smiled, so she went along with it.

When Derek made a fish-face at her, Lilly gave them a wide smile, still free of teeth, giving Megan the chance to snap a picture.

"Good girl!" Meredith cheered in relief.

Derek clapped in encouragement. "One down, one million to go."

...

Over the next hour, Megan had taken upward of a hundred pictures, and by the end, Lilly had practically fallen asleep leaning against Charlie. She'd been a trooper, though, cooperating through outfit changes and various poses. The pictures they'd gotten were perfect, so a little sleepiness was well worth it. Lilly even slept right through her bath, not even waking to nurse.

And now, she was still sleeping, snoozing away in her bassinet while Meredith brushed her teeth in the bathroom. Derek sat in bed and browsed through the collection of Lilly's photos Megan had put onto a flash drive for them. Lilly looked beautiful in every one, so beautiful that they'd probably end up buying the whole set.

Lilly sighed softly in her sleep and Derek glanced over at her, smiling at the way she scrunched her tiny nose. Since substantially cutting his hours at the hospital after Lilly was born, the prospect of eventually going back to work full time was daunting enough, let alone taking over as Chief of Surgery in a few years. And while he understood the magnitude of the opportunity, he wasn't sure he would accept it. Derek had been going over his conversation with Richard all day, and he wasn't sure what to expect from Meredith when he told her about it. But still, he knew he had to. She was his wife, and she needed to be able to give her input.

The bathroom light flicked off, and Meredith walked into their bedroom, wearing the Dartmouth tee shirt he loved so much. She pulled out her ponytail and smiled at him before climbing on top of him in bed. She cupped his cheeks and kissed him, starting at his neck, working her way to his jawline and finally settling for his lips.

Derek was happy to oblige, kissing her back and tasting the minty toothpaste she'd just used. "Hmm, as much as I love this, Lilly is right next to us," he murmured.

Meredith laughed against his lips. "I know. That's why I'm keeping my hands on your face and not snaking them into your pants," she said.

"Good idea."

She rolled off of him and onto her side, resting her head on his chest. "I know I said this already, but thank you for bringing Lilly up to the hospital today. I always love when you guys visit."

"Happy to do it," Derek said before kissing the top of her head. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close. "So, Lilly and I bumped into the Chief today on the way to the gallery."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. We got to talking and he, uh... kind of offered me his job," Derek said.

Meredith raised her head to look at him. "He what?"

"Not now. But eventually, you know, down the line when he's ready to retire," he explained.

Meredith sat up and leaned against the headboard, so she would be at a better angle to talk to him. Even before saying a word, she could read his body language, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. "You don't sound excited," she said. "I mean... you're gonna take it, right?"

"I don't know," he answered honestly.

"You don't know?"

"I need time to think about it," Derek said.

"Derek, if you want the job, you should take it. We can make it work," Meredith said in support as she reached for his hand.

Derek sighed, running his thumb over her knuckles. "I don't know if I want it."

"That's why you came to Seattle in the first place," Meredith reminded him.

"That was a long time ago. If this were five years ago, I'd be ready to sign the contract. Life is different now," Derek said.

"Yes, but that doesn't mean you have to give up on the things you want," Meredith said. She glanced down at their hands, and when she looked up again, there were tears in her eyes, ones she willed away but still came anyway.

"Derek, you're taking time off for me, so you could be here with Lilly while I worked, so we wouldn't have to put her in daycare. And you did it without a second thought. Pulling out of the driveway every morning is always the hardest part of my day, but I'm _so grateful_ to you that I'm able to do it," Meredith said.

"I did it because I love you, and I love Lilly, and I haven't regretted that decision for a split second. Our family comes first. We decided that before Lilly even existed, and I'm afraid that if I were to take the job, I'd go back on that promise," Derek said, swallowing past the lump in his throat.

"Derek, you wouldn't. I know you wouldn't. And Richard isn't going to retire for a few years, anyway. Would you consider it if Lilly were in kindergarten?" Meredith asked, trying to tread lightly, instead of bulldozing him into a decision.

"What about the next baby we want to have? What if he or she is a toddler?"

Meredith chewed on her lower lip with her teeth. "Well, we could always..."

"Postpone having another baby? No, we're not doing that. We're not putting our lives on hold so I can take a job I may not want, anyway," Derek said, shaking his head.

"If you really don't want the job, that's okay. But there's a difference between not _wanting_ it and feeling like you _shouldn't_ take it. I just want you to make the decision for the right reason," Meredith emphasized, her eyes studying his, hoping he understood what she was trying to say.

He swung her legs over his, so she was sitting on his lap. "You know why I wanted you to be able to finish your residency on time?"

"Because you're a great husband and father," Meredith answered.

Derek smiled at her. "Because I want to save lives with you. That surgery today... Meredith, you were flawless. Literally, flawless. That's how I want to spend my career. With you. In the OR. I want to witness all of that talent and brilliance firsthand; not just hear about it from behind a desk and a pile of paperwork. I want that for us."

"I want that, too," she said softly.

"And that's something we wouldn't be able to do if I were Chief. We both know that," Derek told her.

Meredith let out a sigh. "I know. I guess I just feel kind of guilty."

"Guilty? Why?" Derek asked in concern.

"Because. You made this huge sacrifice for me, and I feel like I'm holding you back," she admitted.

"You're not holding me back from anything. You never have. Mer, without you, that job would be all I had. But then I fell in love with you, and you gave me Lilly. Now you're on your way to becoming an attending, and I can't wait to work with you every day. We can both be surgeons and parents, and not feel like one has to come at the expense of the other," Derek said, his hands resting on the small of her back.

"You've given this some thought, huh?" Meredith guessed as she played with the curls on the back of his neck.

"Yeah. I have."

Meredith nodded slowly. "So, you really don't want to do it? You're not just saying that because you think you can't, now that we have a baby? If you want to sleep on it, you can. I mean, you have a few years before you'd need to decide, anyway. Seriously, that's totally—"

Before she could continue on with her ramble, Derek cut her off, pressing his lips to hers again. Meredith only moaned in response, making no protests. She weaved her fingers through his hair, and when they finally pulled back for breath, she rested her forehead against his.

"Wow," she whispered, her skin flushed and her insides tingling.

"Yeah."

Meredith raised herself off his legs and peeked into the bassinet, where Lilly was still sleeping. Confident that they could sneak away for a while, she grabbed the baby monitor off Derek's nightstand. "Come on," she said.

"Where are we going?" he asked, following her out of the room.

"Wanna have sex in front of the fireplace?"

Before he could respond, she was shimmying out of her pants, and he answered by taking off his own.


	134. Shopping & Santa

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but I don't.**

**Thank you, as always! Enjoy!  
**

Mark sat at his desk in his office, doing research on his upcoming maxillo-facial surgery. Or he was trying to, anyway. But the noise coming from Derek's office next door was highly disruptive. And getting pornier by the minute.

Since Lilly was born and visited the hospital frequently, Derek had rearranged his office to make room for a port-a-crib. The couch that included a fancy pull-out bed had been moved to the wall of Derek's office that he shared with Mark, which meant he could always tell when one of their trysts was going on. **  
**

Mark looked at his watch and sighed. Today was one for the books. It had been going on for close to an hour now, and part of him wondered if the noise could be heard all the way down in the pit on the ground floor. He tried to tune out the porno movie going on next door, focusing his attention on the article he was reading.

"Derek, yes! Harder! Don't stop!" Meredith chanted from Derek's office. And judging by the way Mark's diplomas rattled on the wall incessantly, Derek had no intention of stopping.

"Oh God, Meredith. You feel. So. Good," Derek said with an animalistic grunt.

"Holy... yeah. You too!"

Mark dropped his head onto the keyboard. "How does Lilly sleep through this?" he murmured to himself.

The bed banging against the wall lasted a little while longer with growing intensity, until they both let out moans that lasted at least at least thirty seconds each. Then, all was quiet like the calm after a storm, and Mark could only hope it was over. He got up out of his swivel chair and centered the crooked frames on the wall like he did every time. Then he walked out into the hall and leaned against the door to Derek's office, waiting for the culprits to emerge.

When they finally did a few minutes later, sporting messy hair and flushed faces, not even the most deceiving excuse could fool Mark. Meredith was the first to notice him standing there, and she jumped back in surprise.

"Oh. Hi. Hey," she said, her voice flustered as she smoothed her fingers through her hair.

Mark grinned at both of them, arms crossed over his chest. "Well, you two look... satisfied."

A hot blush crept over Meredith's cheeks, and she buried her face in Derek's shoulder. "Crap."

"Mark," Derek acknowledged.

"Forty-nine minutes. That's impressive," Mark complimented as he clapped Derek on the back. "Jeez, Grey. I'm surprised you can walk. Whatever Derek was doing to you in there, I want him to give me notes."

Rather than submit to Mark's ribbing, Derek played along. "I'll be sure to do that."

"Did you really hear us the whole time?" Meredith asked, unsure of whether she really wanted the answer.

"I was trying to read a nine page article on maxillary reconstruction. I didn't make it past the second paragraph," Mark replied.

"Hey, we have a teething six month old whose gums decide to hurt at three in the morning. George and Izzie had free time, so they volunteered to watch Lilly for a while. There was an opportunity for sex, so we took it," Meredith defended. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed Derek's cheek. "And yes, Derek is very, very good at sex."

"Well, judging by the way my med school diploma was one more thrust away from falling off the wall, it would have to be," Mark seconded.

"Oh God," Meredith groaned.

"You said that a lot in the last hour," Mark chuckled. Meredith's face turned a deeper shade of red, and she averted her eyes out of embarrassment. "Oh, come on. I'm just messing with you. Gotta get my revenge while it's still fresh."

"Resorting to blackmail?" Derek assumed.

"Nah, that's tacky," Mark said, shaking his head. "But I do have a favor to ask. Well, not really a favor. More like an invitation."

Meredith raised her eyebrows in suspicion. "An invitation?"

"Yeah. Bridget already went overboard with Lilly's Christmas gifts, and wants to give her a few now. Otherwise, she'll be opening fifty of them on Christmas morning," Mark said.

"I told her not to do that," Meredith said amusedly.

"You should see our living room. She has these huge piles for each of her nieces. There's also a section for the gifts she gives her kindergartners. Pretty soon, I won't have a couch to sit on," Mark said.

"I guess we could," Derek shrugged, looking to Meredith, who nodded in agreement. "Mer and I are heading down to the OR in a few minutes. I'm overseeing her perform a shunt placement, then we're prying Lilly away from Stevens and O'Malley to get her picture taken with Santa and do some Christmas shopping. How's six sound?"

"Sounds good. I'll call Bridget and let her know," Mark said as he took his phone from his pocket. "Oh, and if at any point tonight, you feel to urge to tear each other's clothes off, just say the word. We'll watch Lilly while you two go bang one out in the guest room."

Meredith laughed. "Don't tempt us. I swear, we'll do it.

...

"Okay, Sing-a-Long Elmo or Rock 'N Roll Elmo?" Derek asked as he and Meredith stood in front of the Elmo display, Lilly happily sitting on Meredith's hip. Toys 'R' Us was the first stop on their agenda, and they hoped that by the time they were finished, they'd accumulate a majority of Lilly's toys for her to open on Christmas morning.

Meredith looked between both toys and bit her lip in contemplation. "No idea. They both kind of creep me out."

"Elmo isn't creepy. Lilly loves him. How about we sample both, and get whichever one she likes more?" Derek suggested. He squeezed Rock 'N Roll Elmo's fuzzy, red hand and the puppet began strumming the plastic guitar attached to it, accompanied by a jarring beat that sounded more like noise than actual music.

Lilly and Meredith made the same cute face of disapproval, and Derek laughed. "Okay, then. How about the Sing-a-Long one?"

"Can't be worse than the guitar one," Meredith shrugged.

Derek tested the Sing-a-Long Elmo this time, and it belted out a melodic version of 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,' along with arm gestures. Lilly smiled in delight and let out a tiny giggle, listening intently all the way through.

"Sing-a-Long wins," Derek said, taking it from the shelf and putting it in the cart.

"I think so," Meredith agreed. She spotted a bag of large foam blocks and pointed to the shelf. "Oh, I wanted to get her these. Blocks help build motor skills, _and_ they're injury-proof."

"Win-win. Do we want basic kind, or the ones that come with the advanced shapes?" Derek asked before shaking his head. "What am I saying? Our daughter is a genius. She's not threatened by cylinders and trapezoids."

Meredith laughed, always amused by Derek's parental bragging. Although, she was just as guilty, and she knew it. "I think she can handle it."

Derek pulled the bag of blocks off the shelf and dropped it into the cart, which was growing increasingly full. A puzzle box caught his eye, and he turned his attention to the other side of the aisle. "Mer, look at this."

"Human Anatomy Puzzle Collection for Children," Meredith read off the front of the large box. "Six colorful, creative, and kid-friendly puzzles, including the brain, spine, heart, large bones and muscles, and abdominal organs."

"Look, the brain puzzle is sectioned off into lobes; even the medulla has its own piece. And there's pieces for every spine level, from C-1 to S-5," Derek said, sounding like a little kid on Christmas morning.

"No reproductive system. I guess that would be the adult-friendly version," Meredith smirked, bouncing Lilly on her heels. "Would people make fun of us if we got anatomy puzzles for our six month old?"

"Probably. Just because she can't use them right now doesn't mean she won't grow into them. She can play with puzzles for years. Besides, people won't be making fun of us when Lilly's top of her class at med school," Derek pointed out.

"Okay, you convinced me. Put it in the cart," Meredith said, using her free hand to make room for it.

"I think we're more excited than Lilly is," Derek chuckled. "I promise, Christmas is fun. You're gonna love it, Princess."

Meredith stopped in front of a baby furniture display. "I think Lilly would love this, too," she said, admiring a baby recliner seat. She ran her hand over the sample that had soft, giraffe-printed upholstery, smiling when Lilly stretched her hand out toward it, copying her mom. "Do you like this, Lillybug?"

"Looks comfy," Derek said.

Meredith reached for the tag attached to the small seat and skimmed the description. "The Nap Nanny. Its contoured design cradles your baby in ultimate comfort... provides babies eight pounds or more the comfort they need well into their toddler years... foam core... maximum safety... easily washable."

"Jeez, I want one," Derek joked, scanning the shelf. "It comes in a lot of patterns. What one do you like?"

"I think Lilly is digging the giraffe one," Meredith said, smiling as Lilly touched the soft fabric on the seat.

"Giraffe it is," Derek said. He hoisted the large, square box off the shelf and put it next to the Elmo, puzzles, and other purchases in the cart. "Good thing Daddy makes fancy neurosurgeon money, because someone is spoiled."

Meredith pressed kisses to Lilly's cheek. "She's an only child for now. We can spoil her. Plus, we're putting her on Santa's lap for the first time today. It'll be good to have a toy available to prevent a possible meltdown."

"Those are the best pictures, though. The ones where the kids are flipping out and Santa just sits there with a smile on his face. Not that I want Lilly to cry, but even if she did, the picture would still be adorable," Derek said as they rounded the corner and walked down the next aisle.

Plush toys lined both sides, and Lilly's blue eyes went wide as she surveyed the long row of shelves. Derek took Lilly from Meredith to give her a break from holding her, and sat her on his arm, so she could look around. "I think we've hit the stuffed animal mother load, Lilly."

"Look, there's dolls, too. She doesn't have a doll yet," Meredith said, scrunching her nose at an ugly Cabbage Patch kid. "Not all of them are cute, though."

"This one cries and poops," Derek said as he looked at a lifelike doll that came with a pack of play diapers.

Meredith laughed. "We already have one baby that does that."

"Here's some for Lilly's age group," Derek said, walking a little further down the aisle.

Lilly's smiled at one of the dolls on the shelf, talking to it with her happy babble as she reached her hand for it. Meredith picked up the box containing the doll and held it closer to her, making sure it was the one Lilly seemed interested in. Lilly's smile grew and she gently patted its face with her chubby hand.

"Is this the baby doll you want, peanut?" Meredith asked her.

"Good choice. All soft and snuggly, and it won't spew things at us," Derek pointed out. He shifted Lilly to his hip, and held the doll box with his free hand so Lilly could amuse herself looking at it. "I can't wait to hear what she calls her. Maybe that's what she'll name her daughter, like you with your Lilly doll."

"Hmm, maybe," Meredith smiled. "My Dad said I just came out with the name Lilly one day. I guess I loved it, even when I was a toddler."

"Just goes to show you have good taste in names. Way better than my sister's. Amy had this doll growing up. She named it Gertie. No idea where that name came from. Probably a good thing she has two sons, so she couldn't name them that," he teased.

"Could be worse. I had a stuffed lamb named Kiki when I was little. If future fictitious baby number two is another girl, we could name her that," Meredith suggested.

Derek cringed at the thought. "I think I'd rather name her Gertie."

...

"Okay, we're next," Meredith said with anxious anticipation as they stood in the front of the line to get Lilly's pictures with Santa. She fixed Lilly's hair bow, so her little curls would be visible in the photos, then smoothed out the front of her green dress. "Do you think she'll freak out? I don't want her to get scared."

"Nah, it's only for a few minutes. We'll stay where she can see us," Derek said in an attempt to soothe Meredith's worries. "Right, Lilly? You're tough. You're not afraid of Santa."

"Okay, you can come on up," said the cheerful college-aged girl in an elf costume. She stepped aside so they could walk toward Santa in his oversized chair, the bells on her shoes jingling with each movement.

The jolly mall Santa waved at Lilly with his white gloves. "Ho ho ho! Who do we have here?" he asked.

"This is Lilly," Derek said, holding his breath as he sat Lilly down on Santa's lap.

"Hi there, Lilly. It's so nice to meet you," Santa said as he bounced Lilly on his knee. "First visit?"

"It is. We're a little nervous," Meredith admitted.

Mall Santa smiled warmly. "Oh, there's nothing to be nervous about. We'll just take some pictures. How's that sound, Lilly?"

"We'll be right over here, Princess," Derek said as he and Meredith slowly backed away toward the photographer who was also dressed like an elf.

Lilly looked between the fat, bearded man in the red suit to her parents, a curious expression on her face as she tried to make sense of the situation. The photographer elf held up a teddy bear with jingle bells around its neck and shook it from side to side, so Lilly would look at the camera. But Lilly had no interest in the bear, keeping her eyes on her mom and dad instead.

"Make her laugh," Meredith murmured to Derek, keeping her smile on with the hope that Lilly would mirror it.

Derek quickly went into action, making his reliable funny faces that always made Lilly happy. Lilly broke out in a fit of delighted giggles, giving one of her big, gummy smiles to the camera, and the photographer snapped the picture.

"Good girl!" Meredith cheered, clapping her hands in praise. "Keep doing it. It's working."

"Lilly, look at Daddy!" Derek called out before making a fish face at her.

The smile stayed on Lilly's face, and Meredith was determined to keep up the momentum by throwing peek-a-boo into the mix. She put her hands over her face for a few seconds to build the suspense, then pulled them away. "Peek-a-boo!" she shouted softly.

The photographer managed to take three more pictures during the round of entertainment, but just when she was about to take another, Lilly decided she'd had enough, and her lower lip quivered.

"Crap," Meredith whispered.

"Look at the face she's making," Derek couldn't help but laugh at his daughter's expense. "Can you get a picture of that?" he asked the photographer.

"Sure," the woman said, taking another photo of Lilly. "That's what parents call the post-smile, pre-meltdown shot."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully, amused by Derek's request. "Okay, I think Lilly's finished," she said, walking over to mall Santa. "We got some great pictures. Thank you."

"My pleasure. You have a very Merry Christmas. I'll be sure to bring you lots of presents," he said as he handed her to Meredith.

Lilly sniffled back tears, the pending crying fit averted when she was back in the safety of her mother's arms. Meredith ran a soothing hand down Lilly's back. "Say bye-bye," she said, waving the baby's hand.

"Bye, Lilly," Santa waved back cheerfully.

Meredith walked toward the kiosk where Derek was already sneaking a peek at Lilly's pictures. He smiled when he saw her approaching. "Mer, you've got to see these."

She looked at the computer screen, her eyes scanning the photos, and she smiled, too. "Wow, they're all so cute."

"I know," Derek said, studying each one closely. "I think her smile in the fourth picture is the biggest. That was during our fish face, peek-a-boo combo. We pulled out all the stops for that smile."

"That's my favorite, too. You can really see her curls in that one."

"We get to choose two prints. I say we get that one and the pouty one. It's adorable," Derek grinned.

Meredith laughed, rocking her hips from side to side when she felt Lilly rest her head on her chest. "It really is. I love it," she said. "Although, I think Lilly probably has a different opinion."

"You did so good, Lilly. We got such nice pictures of you," he told her, ticking her belly lightly with his finger. "Wanna go with those two, then?"

"Yeah."

Lilly scrunched her nose at Derek as though she disapproved, and he chuckled at her always impeccable timing. "I know. We embarrass you, don't we? But I promise, you'll thank us one day."

...

It was almost six o'clock when they arrived at Mark and Bridget's house, Lilly much happier after changing out of her dress and being finished dealing with Santa pictures until next year. She stretched her tiny fingers in her mittens as they walked up the steps to the front door, wondering how she could free them in order to suck her thumb.

Meredith laughed when she noticed, and kissed the top of her hat-covered head. "We'll take them off in one minute, sweetpea," she promised.

Before Derek could knock, Mark had already opened the front door, stepping aside so they could enter. "Hey," he greeted, before reaching for Lilly. "Hi, beautiful." He pulled off Lilly's hat, coat, then mittens, and her thumb immediately found its way to her mouth. "How'd it go with Santa?"

Meredith shrugged off her coat and handed it to Derek, who put it on one of the wall hooks. "Good, actually. She was all smiles until the end; then she was over the whole thing. We got a happy one and a pouty one. I have copies for you guys in my bag."

"Naughty and nice?" Mark joked.

"That's a good way to put it," Derek said.

"Hey, you guys. Thanks for coming. Hi, Lilly. I missed you," Bridget said, stealing Lilly away from Mark so she could have a turn holding her. "Dinner is ready, and after we eat, Lilly has a few presents to open."

Meredith saw a pile of presents with Lilly's name on the tags, and she shook her head. "Bridge, I'm gonna kill you," she scolded playfully.

"Oh, it's not that much. I always go overboard for my nieces every year, and Lilly is my niece, too," Bridget said as they walked into the dining room. "I hope you're hungry."

"I'm sure they worked up quite an appetite after this morning. I got to listen to the soundtrack to their sex life," Mark said.

Derek took his seat at the table next to Meredith. "I should've known you were gonna bring that up again," he said.

"It's like live action porn," Mark upheld. "Don't get me wrong; it's hot. Just... disturbing. And kind of disruptive, especially after an hour."

"Hey, they have a baby. I say do it when you can, where you can," Bridget said, holding up her glass in support.

Meredith tapped her glass against Bridget's. "Exactly. Thank you," she said. She took a sip of her water, then reached for Lilly. "Come here, peanut. We'll feed you. Derek, can you get her bag? I packed applesauce for her."

"Sure," Derek said, getting up from his chair.

"She suffers through Santa pictures, and all she gets is applesauce? Poor kid," Mark teased as he scooped some pasta onto his plate.

Meredith laughed. "She loves applesauce. Definitely more than she loves Santa; but she'll love the presents he's going to bring her."

"Santa spent half his paycheck on those presents," Derek chimed in as he walked back into the room with Lilly's bag. "We may have gone a little overboard."

"Plus, the presents from you guys, Derek's whole family, my family, and all of our friends. We might need to have a second baby sooner rather than later, so she'll have a playmate to get use out of all of them," Meredith said, fastening Lilly's bib.

"If you're looking, we might have the perfect baby for that," Mark said.

Derek peeled off the lid to Lilly's applesauce, then dipped the infant spoon into it. "Oh, yeah? Who's that?" he asked interestedly.

Bridget took Mark's hand and smiled. "Ours."

Both Meredith and Derek looked up from Lilly as they began feeding her. "What?" Meredith said.

"We did it. We made a baby," Mark said with a grin that reached his eyes.

"Oh my God!" Meredith gasped, eyes wide in surprise.

Derek gave Mark a celebratory clap on the back. "Congratulations!" he said. "We're so thrilled for you guys. Hear that, Lilly? You're gonna have a cousin."

"We had our first appointment yesterday. I'm six weeks pregnant," Bridget said.

Meredith smiled, her mind flooding with memories of when she and Derek found out she was pregnant. She knew the happiness and the relief she felt when it finally happened, and it's a feeling she cherished, one she'd never forget. "Wow," she whispered. "Six weeks. So that means when you and I talked on Thanksgiving..."

"I was already pregnant, but didn't know it yet," Bridget finished, laughing slightly. "Here I was, worrying it wasn't going to happen, and there was a baby inside me the whole time."

"See? I told you," Meredith said, wiping under her eyes with her shirtsleeve.

"I'm still kind of in shock. When we got back from New York after Thanksgiving, I started feeling run down. I just chalked it up to jet lag from the trip; and there's always colds and stomach bugs spreading around in my class, so I figured I picked something up from one of my kindergartners. But then I was late so I—" Bridget explained before blushing. "Sorry, Derek. I know this is TMI."

Derek chuckled, shaking his head. "Believe me, I've seen and heard it all with Mer, and watched her give birth. Nothing fazes me," he assured her as he fed Lilly a spoonful of applesauce.

"It's true. And once you have a baby, all modesty goes out the window. Derek and I say the word 'poop' a hundred times a day. That'll be you guys in a few months," Meredith said.

"Looking forward to it," Mark joked.

"So then I told Mark, and he convinced me to take a test. And sure enough, we got the plus sign," Bridget said.

"That's the most incredible feeling," Derek smiled, leaning over and kissing Lilly's forehead. "And it only gets better."

"We got our first sonogram this week and saw the heartbeat. It still feels surreal," Bridget replied, her hand already drawn to her stomach. "Dr. Halloran said the baby looks healthy. We don't want to make the big announcement until at least January. No one knows except my immediate family. And we consider you guys family, so we had to tell you, too."

"I'm so glad you told us. Now we can start spoiling yours like you spoil Lilly," Meredith said. "So when's your due date?"

"July 21st," Mark said.

"Summer baby, huh? If he or she holds out eight extra days, Mer and the baby could share July 29th as a birthday," Derek said. "Think you're gonna find out the sex?"

"We haven't decided. I wanna be surprised, but Bridget wants to find out," Mark said, biting into a breadstick. "I'm sure I'll cave and she'll win."

"Derek and I didn't decide to find out until the night before, and even then, all Lilly showed us was her tiny butt at the appointment. We got twenty-four extra hours of suspense," Meredith giggled as she wiped Lilly's chin with her bib.

"Ours doesn't have a butt to show us yet, but we do have pictures. Want to see?" Bridget asked, not waiting for a response before she hurried into the living room to get them. She returned within seconds holding the small stack, and handed them to Meredith. "Here you go. I know we're biased, but he or she is pretty adorable."

"Cutest little blob you've ever seen," Mark boasted, looking to Lilly. "Tied with you, of course. You were a damn cute blob yourself."

Meredith hugged Lilly closer and smiled. "Yes, she was," she said. She set the pile down on the table and looked at the one on top. A tiny, blobby human in a sea of black, just what Lilly's first baby pictures looked like. "Oh, you guys made a beautiful baby."

"Really did," Derek complimented, flipping to the next picture. "Crazy, isn't it? How something so little can already be so perfect?"

"Yeah," Bridget said softly as Mark wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

Mark grinned. "That baby already looks like a Sloan."

Derek held up the sonogram picture and glanced back and forth between it and Mark. "You're right. The resemblance is uncanny," he joked.

"Isn't it?" Mark agreed.

"I can't wait until I'm further along, so we can really see the baby's face in the 3-D pictures. I remember when you showed us Lilly's, I couldn't believe how clear they were," Bridget said.

"That's how we found out Lilly was a thumb sucker. She used Mer's placenta as a pillow and just lounged around sucking her thumb all day," Derek said, wiggling the spoon out of Lilly's mouth after she bit down on it.

"Placenta pillow," Mark echoed. "Sounds comfy."

Meredith laughed, twirling some pasta on her fork with one hand, the other holding Lilly steady on her lap. "Yeah, I think that's why Lilly decided to camp out an extra seven days. Apparently, being inside me is quite nice."

"Well, if this morning is any indication, Derek sure thinks so," Mark smirked, still exercising his right to revenge after having to listen to them going at it earlier today.

Meredith cocked her head at him, her attention pulled from the sonogram pictures. "Seriously? Still?"

"Oh, come on. You walked right into that one," Mark pointed out.

Derek kissed her cheek in sympathy. "You kinda did, Mer."


	135. Lilly's First Christmas

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

**Sorry for the delay! I meant to have this posted yesterday, but there was a bad storm that knocked out my internet, and it was just restored today. Hope you enjoy this chapter! :)  
**

It was Lilly's first Christmas, and the floor under the tree was hidden in a sea of presents. Meredith and Derek worked well into the overnight hours to finish wrapping all of them, and now, it was time for Lilly to do the unwrapping, with much assistance from her parents. Meredith held Lilly in her arm as she descended the stairs, Derek behind them, all still in their pajamas. The baby looked with wide blue eyes, surveying the Christmas village that had once been their home.

"I think Santa was here, Lillybug," Derek smiled as the three walked into the living room.

Charlie trotted around, already sniffing for his own presents that they gave him every year. Meredith laughed, sitting down on the floor. "I think he's just as excited as we are," she said.

"I think so," Derek agreed. He scanned the pile of presents until he found one of Charlie's, then tossed it to him. "There you go, buddy."

Charlie stretched out next to Meredith and happily began tearing off the wrapping paper with his teeth, which he enjoyed as much as the treat inside. "Good boy," Meredith praised. She set Lilly between herself and Derek, kissing the top of her head.

"Santa left you a lot of gifts, peanut. Which one do you want to open first?"

"How about this one?" Derek suggested, reaching for a present wrapped in candy cane paper. He put it in front of Lilly, and she stared at it with interest. He peeled off a large strip, then handed it to her. "Go ahead. You can rip it," he encouraged.

Lilly gently tugged at it and Meredith smiled. "Good girl. Want Mommy to help you?" she asked. She sped up the process and helped Lilly pull off the paper the rest of the way.

Lilly's tiny lips formed an 'o' shape when she saw her present, which her parents took as a sign of approval. "These are rubber duckies for when you eventually outgrow your little tub, and we switch to the sink and the real bathtub. There's ten of them... ballerina, fireman, cowboy, my personal favorite, Dr. Duck. Do you like them, Lilly?" Derek asked.

The baby wiggled her tiny bottom on the floor in excitement, clad in her Santa pajamas, and babbled up at them. "Yeah, and that's just the first one. There's about a hundred more to go," Meredith replied.

"Literally, by the time she opens up the presents everyone else got her, too," Derek pointed out, sliding another present toward Lilly.

Meredith peeled off a piece of the wrapping paper on the next gift to give Lilly a head start. Lilly grabbed at it and managed to tear it off with her tiny hand. "Look at you. You're a pro after two presents," Meredith said. She helped Lilly tear off the paper the rest of the way, freeing the little, stuffed lion from inside.

"Ooh, a lion," Derek said, holding it up. He made a growling sound in his throat, and Lilly giggled loudly, taking it from Derek when he handed it to her.

"That sounded like a S-E-X noise," Meredith accused, her tone playful.

"Hmm, I'm saving the rest for her nap time when we can actually do that," Derek said, leaning over to kiss her.

Meredith smiled against his lips. "Can't wait," she said. "Everyone will be here at 4:00, so as long as we're able to get the house organized, we might even be able to go two rounds."

"Really?"

"Really," Meredith echoed.

"And no one minds making the drive out here? Because we could go to the old house," Derek said, getting another present for Lilly to open. Lilly dropped the lion onto her lap and reached for the strip of paper Derek had already peeled for her.

"No, Izzie actually suggested everyone coming out here. They know we have Lilly now, and want to spend our first Christmas at home with her. Plus, everyone has presents for her, and we'd probably have to make three trips to bring them all back here. Having Christmas at our place just made the most sense," Meredith explained.

"Okay," Derek nodded.

Lilly succeeded in ripping off a large piece of paper on her own, and they both looked at her in surprise. "Jeez, Lil. You've got some strength in those little arms, huh?" Derek said.

"That's my girl," Meredith said proudly as Derek helped her unwrap the gift all the way. "Ooh, Santa got you a baby doll."

Lilly looked at her parents, expecting them to open the box, and Derek chuckled. "Okay, I'll open her for you."

Meredith kissed the top of her head. "It's crazy how we know exactly what she's thinking without her even talking," she said.

"I know. We're very in sync," Derek grinned as he freed the doll from the plastic box, then started to untwist the ties holding her plush body in place. "The doll is made of polyester and cotton. Why do they package it like it's made of glass?"

"It's all about the anticipation," Meredith teased.

Once he was done, he laid the doll in Lilly's lap, and she smiled, hugging it in her arm. "Very good, Lilly. Do you love your doll?" Derek said.

"Remember you picked her out, Lilly?" Meredith said before biting her lip. "You know, then we sent her to Santa, and Santa's elves wrapped her and Santa brought her back to you?"

"Nice save."

"Thank you," she played along.

Derek reached for a fourth gift for Lilly to open, wrapped in penguin paper. "I think she'll be opening gifts until New Year's," he joked, though at this rate, it was a possibility.

...

Lilly made it through fifteen more presents between breakfast and her morning nap, which included a playmat, teething toys, a bouncer, blocks, stuffed animals, and puzzles. All of the gifts were a hit so far, and she'd barely made a dent in them. While she napped, Derek and Meredith were on clean-up duty, shoveling the mountains of wrapping paper into a trash bag, so the floor would be free of clutter when Lilly started round two of present opening.

"It's only 11:15, and I think we both could use a nap, too," Derek chuckled, dumping the last armful of wrapping paper into the bag Meredith held open.

Meredith glanced at Lilly, who was snoozing away in her swing, lulled to sleep by a full belly and watching the Christmas lights on the tree. "I know. Maybe next year, we'll get a jump start on gift wrapping before Christmas Eve," she laughed. "By the time two AM rolled around, my wrapping skills went from mediocre to embarrassingly crappy."

Derek held up one of the gifts that Lilly had yet to open, one that Meredith had wrapped in gingerbread paper. "Yeah, this is pretty bad," he admitted, surveying the box in his hand.

Meredith wadded up a ball of gift wrap and threw it at him. "Shut up," she smirked.

He set the present back in Lilly's pile, then picked up one of the gifts he'd gotten for Meredith. "How about you and I open some while she's sleeping?" he suggested.

"You sure? I promised you Christmas sex," Meredith reminded him.

Derek patted the spot on the floor next to him. "Fine, just these two for now. I can't hold off any longer."

"Okay," Meredith said, her curiosity piqued. She sat down beside him and eyed the presents sitting in his lap with interest. "Are these sex-related gifts? Is that why you want me to open them now?"

"No, but that would've been a good idea," Derek said, handing her the smaller of the two presents. "They go together, but open this one first."

Meredith took it and carefully tore off the wrapping paper, smiling when she saw what it was. "Derek."

"Do you like it?"

"You got me a scrub cap with little cartoon brains on it," she said excitedly, unfolding it so she could look at it more closely.

"Yeah. I figured you needed to add to your collection for when you become a neuro fellow in July," Derek grinned.

Meredith dropped the scrub cap in her lap, then put her hands on his cheeks to kiss him. "I can't wait to wear it. Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said, lingering a little longer than usual at her behest. "Hmm, want the next one?"

"Mhm," she murmured as she reluctantly pulled away. "Although, I have to say, a neuro scrub cap is pretty damn good."

"I think you'll like this more," Derek said before handing her the next present that was flat and square.

Meredith flipped it from one side to the other, trying to gauge what it was before opening it. "Is it a naked calendar shoot of Seattle Grace's most attractive males? Because I've been campaigning for that for years," she joked.

"Half right," Derek said. "But there's no nudity."

Meredith peeled off the wrapping paper and her eyebrows knitted in confusion. "So it _is_ a calendar..."

"Open it."

"Okay," Meredith said, flipping it open to January. She saw that one day of every week was circled in black marker, and continued through that way until July. Puzzled, she looked up at him. "One day a week from January to July. I... have no idea what that means."

"It means that from now until you finish residency, you and I will be guaranteed one surgery together per week, maybe more if I can pull it off. I'm gonna find you the most interesting, exciting neuro surgeries I can, and you get to be the lead surgeon. You take point, you do the cutting; a hundred percent in charge," Derek said with a smile that reached his eyes.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. You'll get lots of practice for your boards, and be able to add all of the surgeries to your résumé. And I already talked it over with our friends; they wanted to help, so they offered to watch Lilly during the hours we're in surgery. And now that Bridget and Mark have a baby on the way, they're even more eager to get in some quality baby boot camp," he said.

"Derek."

"I know you and I haven't been able to do many surgeries together since Lilly was born, and I know how much we've missed working together, so I wanted to do this for you."

Meredith bit her lip and smiled at him, brushing away the tears that had pooled under her eyes. "This is the coolest Christmas gift anyone's ever given me."

"You work your ass off. You deserve it," Derek said. "I can't wait to be back in the OR with you and see all of that Meredith Grey brilliance firsthand."

"Well, you may have played a small part in that..." Meredith admitted.

"You've been giving me a run for my money since Katie Bryce," Derek said sincerely.

Meredith blushed, looking down at the scrub cap and calendar in her lap. "Thank you," she said softly, leaning in and kissing him again. "I love them both. And I love you."

"I love you, too."

She moaned as she pulled away from the kiss, peeking at a soundly sleeping Lilly in her swing. Satisfied that she'd still be sleeping for a while, Meredith turned the volume on the baby monitor all the way up, so they'd be able to hear it from their bedroom, then took Derek's hand. "Come on."

"What're we doing?" he asked.

"Having porny Christmas sex," Meredith said, gasping when Derek put his arms behind her knees and picked her up. She wrapped her arms loosely around his neck and kissed his jawline. "But first, I'm going to do all of your favorite things..." she whispered in his ear.

Derek nearly lost his footing on the stairs at the thought, groaning deep in his throat.

"Was that your lion noise, or a sex noise?" Meredith giggled as he carried her down the hall and into their room.

Derek gently dropped her down on the bed and smiled at her. "Maybe a little of both."

...

It was just after 4:00, and Lilly was sitting next to Meredith, happily opening another one of her presents. Meredith surveyed the gift pile around the Christmas tree, adding those to the number of presents that would be arriving with their company in just a few minutes.

When the number got close to fifty, Meredith stopped counting and sighed amuesdly, hugging Lilly to her. "You're very lucky you have a playroom for all of this stuff. Otherwise, we would have nowhere to put it."

"The ham is finally finished. I put it on the stove to cool off," Derek said, walking into the living room.

Meredith smiled. "Smells good," she said as he joined them on the floor. "Just in time for another present."

"Ooh, what've we got, Princess? Judging by the twenty pieces of tape, it's one that Mommy wrapped," Derek joked, earning him a nudge in the arm.

"Okay, that's twice you've mocked my gift wrapping skills," Meredith berated him playfully. "Remember how I got naked and did all of your favorite things this morning?"

"I take it back. It's beautiful; puts Martha Stewart to shame," Derek amended.

"Thank you," Meredith said, ripping the remaining paper and tape off Lilly's gift.

"Oh, we picked a good one. Take Care Teddy Bear," Derek said, taking the toy out of the box for her. "You get to be his doctor and fix him up. He comes with a stethoscope to listen to his heart, a thermometer to take his temperature, and a bandage in case he has any boo-boos. He even talks when you squeeze his hands, his feet, and his belly."

Meredith helped Lilly squeeze the teddy's hand, and Lilly broke out into giggles when he announced that it was time for his checkup.

"Do you like him, peanut?" Meredith asked, kissing the top of her head. Lilly spoke some of her happy babble, still clutching her doll that she'd opened earlier that morning. "Yeah, I think Dr. Lilly approves."

"'Dr. Lilly Shepherd, Chief of Surgery.' I can already picture that stitched on her white coat," Derek said proudly.

"Not Chief of Neurosurgery?" Meredith asked.

Derek grinned. "Both. Maybe she'll marry a fancy neurosurgeon, too."

"In that case, you'll need to be very bossy, Lilly. Handsome, charming brain men are tough. You have to keep them in line," Meredith said, looking at Derek and smiling.

"You've always been very good at that," Derek said.

The doorbell rang, and Charlie quickly trotted to the front door. Derek got up off the floor, following him into the foyer. He saw Mark and Bridget on the other side of the glass door. "Merry Christmas," Derek greeted, pushing the door open for them.

"Merry Christmas," Bridget said as she entered with an armful of food, Mark behind her holding an armful of presents.

Meredith walked into the foyer with Lilly, cocking her head when she saw the exorbitant amount of gifts Mark had with him. "I'm gonna kill you, but Merry Christmas," she joked.

Bridget handed Derek the bowls of mashed potatoes and stuffing, and shrugged off her coat. "Blame the hormones. I'm in baby mode. Lilly is the one that has to reap the benefits until ours is born," she said, reaching her arms out to hold her.

Meredith passed Lilly over, then lead the way back into the living room where there was more space. "How are you feeling? Morning sickness kick in yet?"

"Oh, yeah," Bridget answered. "Like clockwork."

"I loved being pregnant, but morning sickness is something I don't miss. It was worse than all of Lilly's kicks to my ribs and headbutts to my cervix," Meredith recalled.

Mark laughed, setting both bags of Lilly's gifts on the floor. "Headbutts to the cervix," he parroted. "That's festive Christmas conversation if I've ever heard it."

"And that's just pregnancy. Labor and childbirth are even more fun," Meredith said. She smiled when she saw her daughter, who was contentedly sucking her thumb as she sat on Bridget's lap. "It's all worth it, though. I forgot about all the pain and the pushing the second I saw Lilly for the first time. All I could think about was how perfect she was, and how much I loved her."

"I can't wait," Bridget said softly, one hand on her stomach and the other hugging Lilly to her.

"And as for morning sickness, try graham crackers and ginger ale. Derek's mom suggested it when Derek and I told her I was pregnant, and it's the only trick that worked for me. Minty chapstick wards off the queasiness, too. Bailey taught me that," Meredith said.

"I'll definitely put that information to good use," Bridget said gratefully. "I guess you know all the insider tricks."

"I'll even give you a list of the best sex positions. Seriously, that's one perk of getting through morning sickness. Once that stage passed, I wanted sex twenty-four-seven," Meredith disclosed.

Derek caught the tail end of Meredith's sentence after walking back into the living room from the kitchen, and he smirked at her. "Aah, the Christmas tradition of doling out sex tips," he teased.

"It makes Christmas all the merrier," Meredith defended, patting the cushion next to her on the couch.

But before Derek could sit, the doorbell rang again, and he walked toward the foyer. "I'll get it," he said.

Izzie and Alex stood on the other side of the door, Cristina and Owen trailing right behind as they came up the pathway. "Hey; thanks for driving over. Merry Christmas," Derek said as he held the door open with his arm.

"Merry Christmas," Alex echoed, setting a bag of presents on the table.

"The house looks beautiful," Izzie said. "I'm going to put this turkey in the kitchen before I drop it."

"Yeah, sure. Thanks for offering to cook it," Derek said.

"Happy to do it!" Izzie called out as she walked toward the kitchen.

"Wow. It looks like Whoville in here," Cristina said, stepping over the threshold into the foyer.

"Thank you?" Derek replied, taking the comment as a compliment.

Owen smiled, handing Derek the stack of pie boxes he was holding. "Merry Christmas. We brought pie. Apple, blueberry, and pumpkin because Meredith told me it's Lilly's favorite."

"It is. Thank you," Derek said.

Cristina held up both wine bottles she was holding and clanged them together. "We also brought booze."

"And presents. I'll go get them from the car," Owen said.

"You guys, too?" Derek asked.

"I was bored one night while I was on call, so I online shopped for three hours. Besides, she's my goddaughter. I'm supposed to spoil her," Cristina said.

They walked into the living room to join the others, and Derek finally sat down next to Meredith, who was keeping a watch on Lilly to make sure she didn't get overwhelmed by all the people. Derek wrapped his arm around her, then pressed a kiss to her temple.

"I think everybody just tripled Lilly's gift total," he said.

"She hasn't even made it through these yet," Alex said, pointing to the present pile still sitting near the tree.

"Derek and I decided it'll probably be Christmas week instead of Christmas day. She was making good progress until five minutes ago when the next shipment arrived," Meredith giggled.

Cristina accepted Lilly onto her lap when Bridget passed her over, and she bounced the baby in her arm. "Is this all of us?" she asked.

"Yeah. Lexie is spending the day with my dad and Molly's family, and George went home to see his mom. And Arizona's parents flew in for the holiday, so she and Callie are with them this year," Meredith answered.

"George gave me his present to give to Lilly. Lexie, too," Izzie added.

"Torres and Robbins gave us Lilly's gift. It's the one wrapped in the snowflake paper," Mark said.

"Thank you. You didn't have to do all of that. Lilly loves you guys even without all the presents," Meredith said, trying to hold back her smile when she noticed Lilly drooling on Cristina's shoulder. She reached for a burp cloth in Lilly's diaper supply caddy next to the couch, and tossed it to her friend. "Here; I think you need this."

"What? Why?" Cristina asked. She craned her neck to look over her shoulder, then scrunched her nose. "Eww."

"She's been teething for a while. We've gotten used to the drool. One of her bottom teeth is probably going to pop up any day now. Right, Princess?" Derek asked his daughter.

Lilly reached her chubby hand toward him, and Derek took her from Cristina, so she could wipe the baby drool from her shoulder. "Dinner's done, so how about we eat? Then Lilly can start on her next round of gift opening."

"Sounds good," Mark agreed, standing up from the couch, while the rest followed suit. He sidestepped a pile of toys on the floor, ones that Lilly had opened earlier that day. "So, which one's her favorite so far?"

"All of them, I think. Especially the baby doll. She's been holding onto her all day. She really loves the singing Elmo, too. Oh, and the light-up playmat," Meredith said, taking Lilly's bib off her high chair table and Velcroing it around her neck while Derek held her.

Lilly wiggled her legs and laughed as Derek tried to put her in the high chair between his own seat and Meredith's, and he smiled at her. "You think this is funny, huh?"

"Come on, wiggle worm," Meredith said, helping Derek slip her legs through, so she was sitting down. "She had a longer nap than usual today because she was tired out from playing all morning, so she's wide awake now."

"Full of energy and ready for food," Derek said as he buckled her.

"A longer nap, both of your happy, sunshiny selves, and your holiday tradition. I'm assuming there was some Christmas sexing today," Cristina guessed.

Owen turned his head toward her, eyes wide. "Cristina."

"What? It's the truth," Cristina said, reaching for her water glass. "Wait, it didn't happen on this table, right?"

Derek glanced up from the turkey he had started carving and sighed. "It's Christmas, Yang," he reminded her.

"We have a bed, Cristina," Meredith said, scooping sweet potatoes onto Lilly's divided infant dish.

"Hasn't stopped you before," Alex laughed as he passed the stuffing bowl to Izzie.

Izzie gave a shrug of agreement. "I love you guys, but it's true," she said with a smile.

"What? When was this?" Mark asked interestedly.

"Mark," Derek scolded.

"Come on, it's all in good humor. You two are known for your sexcapades," Mark upheld.

"The first time we caught them was a few years ago. Iz and I got home from work, and we found them doing it on the kitchen counter. Then they went upstairs and finished while Iz bleached the counter top," Alex said.

Meredith felt her cheeks blush, but she smiled anyway. "Yes, thank you for sharing that."

"Wait, you said that was the first time. What was the second?" Mark prodded.

"Oh, God," Meredith groaned.

"Alex and I went out to lunch one Saturday afternoon. When we got home, there they were, stark naked, having sex on the stairs. In front of a full length glass door... in broad daylight... during Girl Scout season," Izzie recalled.

"Yeah. A minute after they fled upstairs, a Girl Scout actually showed up. This sweet kid in her uniform, with a wagon full of cookies, so she could get her freaking cookie badge," Alex added.

"That's a shame. If you two didn't cause coitus interruptus, she could've learned about the birds and the bees. That would've gotten her a nature badge _and_ her cookie selling badge at the same time," Cristina said, popping the cork on the win bottle she'd brought.

Derek leaned over Lilly and kissed the top of Meredith's head, which she held in her hands. "We need new friends," he said.

"I know," Meredith managed to laugh. She shook off the embarrassment, and proceeded to feed Lilly a bite of sweet potatoes, which the baby eagerly accepted. "Good girl, peanut," she praised. "Anyway, yeah. Derek and I... celebrated today. He got me the best Christmas gift ever, and I had to thank him."

"What did he get you?" Bridget asked.

"One amazing neuro surgery a week from now until when I become an attending. I get to be the lead surgeon on every case," Meredith said, smiling at Derek as he wiped Lilly's chin. "But you guys already knew that, because Derek said you all volunteered to watch Lilly while we're in surgery. And that means the world to me, so thank you."

"I'll watch your kid, but just know that I'm secretly hating you for getting to do solo surgeries, even if it is neuro," Cristina said.

Derek grinned in satisfaction. "That's what you get for mocking us about our sex life," he said, feeding Lilly some mushy green beans from his plate.

"It's an awesome gift. We're happy to help out, especially because it means more Lilly time for the rest of us. You two are always hogging her," Izzie joked.

"I know we do, but we can't help it. She's perfect," Meredith said. "Seriously, look at this face."

"It is a perfect face," Mark agreed.

"This is why holidays require liquor," Cristina said as she topped off her glass of wine.

Meredith smiled, kissing Lilly's rounded cheek as she munched on her green beans. "Still perfect."

...

Lilly's lay sprawled out on her blanket on the living room floor next to Charlie, sound asleep. A sizable amount of presents remained unopened under the tree, ready to be tackled tomorrow morning for Christmas: Round Two. Meredith and Derek sat in front of the fireplace and watched her little chest rise and fall with every breath she took, soaking in the last few hours of Lilly's first Christmas.

"Snoozing away, surrounded by a city of toys, with a belly full of vegetables, fruit, and pie. I'd say Lilly had a pretty great day," Derek said.

Meredith wrapped her arm around his torso, her head resting on his chest. "I think so," she said. "I did, too. Thank you for all my presents, Derek, especially the surgeries."

Derek smiled, his lips pressed to the top of her head. "Hmm, you're welcome."

"You already took time off so I could finish residency, and now, you're just going to hand me the scalpel and let me save lives," Meredith said, raising her head to look at him. "You know how hot and bothered that makes me, don't you?"

"I kind of figured this afternoon when you..." Derek began before glancing over at Lilly, who made a suckling sound with her thumb in her mouth. "Did my favorite things," he censored.

"And that was just the sneak peek. We haven't checked off every item on that favorite things list yet," Meredith hinted. She kissed his chest and sat up. "But before that, I have your last gift."

"What? You already got me a lot," Derek said.

"Those were just little things. I've been waiting to give you this one all day," Meredith said. She crawled over to the tree and reached her arm under the branches, pulling out a small gift before handing it to him. "Here. I wrapped it in Lilly's Elmo paper to throw you off; then I thought you might give it to her to open by mistake, so I tossed it in the back this morning."

"Good thinking," Derek said, flipping the small box over in his hand. "A watch?" he guessed.

"No. And no guessing. Just open it," Meredith said.

Derek smirked as he peeled off the paper. "So bossy."

"I know."

He finished unwrapping the box and popped off the lid, peeking inside. "Keys?"

"Yeah. I would've wrapped what they belong to, but there's no way it would've fit in the front door, much less under the Christmas tree. Anyway, yeah, I sort of got you a fishing boat," Meredith said, smiling nervously.

Derek looked up from the keys in his hand, blinking as her sentence sank in. "Fishing boat?" he echoed.

"You know that picture you have pinned to the bulletin board in your office, the one of the motor boat? You've been talking about getting it since I met you, but you still haven't, so I did it for you."

Derek smiled at her, shaking his head in surprise. "You really got me a boat?"

"Yeah. It got delivered last week, so it's been sitting in Mark and Bridget's garage. I was so tempted to tell you. But after your surgery present to me this morning, I was so glad that I decided to hold off and give it to you today. Oh, and we're getting an extension built on the dock out at the lake. The builders are coming out in the spring. Now we'll be able to keep the boat anchored to it, and the three of us can have picnics out there or whatever. We can put Lilly's little bikini on her, and she can splash her toes in the water," Meredith said. She watched the grin on his face grow, and rubbed her hand over his arm.

"Mer, this is... thank you," Derek said softly.

Meredith smiled at him, giving a small shrug. "You've been a stay-at-home dad_, _and you've been picking up extra shifts at the hospital whenever you can, so I figured this summer, you deserve the chance to relax. I really do appreciate everything you've done for me and for Lilly."

"I'd make the same decision over and over again," Derek said honestly.

She put her hands on either side of his face and kissed him. "I know you would."

Derek jingled the keys in his hand, chuckling slightly. "You know, you're very good at giving gifts."

"I think seven months' worth of solo surgeries still trumps anything I could've gotten you," Meredith giggled.

"You got me a boat _and_ a new and improved dock. Plus, you gave birth to Lilly this year. As far as gifts go, she's..." Derek said as he tried to find a word that felt adequate.

"Un-trumpable?" Meredith supplied, both of them looking over at their daughter, who had her doll snuggled in the crook of her arm.

Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith and smiled. "Yeah. Yeah, she really is."


	136. New Year's Eve

**Disclaimer: Still not mine.**

**As always, sorry for the delay! I hate making you guys wait so long. And I start nursing school on Monday, so I'm going to be pretty busy. But writing this fic will probably be the only thing keeping me sane, so even if it takes a little longer to post, I promise I'll never abandon it! Enjoy! :)  
**

The smooth glide of Meredith's pen scratched jaggedly across the paper she was writing on as Cristina jumped up onto the counter at the ER nurses' station, and the unexpected movement sent Meredith flying backward in her swivel chair.

"Jeez, you scared the crap out of me!" Meredith gasped as she scooted her feet forward to where she was. She picked up her pen and glanced at the post-op note that had gotten interrupted, now decorated with an unintentional zigzag line. "Awesome," she said, rummaging around the desk for the bottle of Wite-Out.

Cristina took a bite of her cereal bar. "Someone's in a mood," she accused.

"Sorry, I've been here since yesterday afternoon. I miss my Lilly," Meredith said as she brushed the Wite-Out sponge over the mark on the page. "One hour and fifty-four minutes to go."

"Any good surgeries come in last night?" Cristina asked.

"Burst appendix, femur fracture, and a second degree burn from a firework mishap," Meredith said. "The guy was celebrating the eve of New Year's Eve. Apparently, trying to light a firework while heavily intoxicated is not a good idea."

"I love working New Year's Eve. You see this Mer?" Cristina said, gesturing to the ER with both hands. "Everything the light touches is my kingdom tonight."

Meredith laughed, tossing the Wite-Out bottle back into the drawer. "Did you seriously just quote _The Lion King_?"

"What can I say? New Year's Eve down here is magical. Owen's letting me run the ER tonight. One of his Christmas gifts to me," Cristina said in excited anticipation.

"Romantic," Meredith teased.

"By the way, props for knowing that was a _Lion King_ quote," Cristina said before taking a sip of her coffee. "I didn't think you'd know what the hell I was talking about."

"I watched it with Derek and Lilly a few days ago," Meredith said, wishing more than anything that she was home with them right now, instead of being stuck at work. "You sure you don't wanna come over tonight? Izzie, Alex, George, and Lexie are going to Joe's, but Mark and Bridget are coming; we're going to watch the Giants-Patriots game, and I could really use an ally."

"And miss Trauma-Palooza?"

"Yeah, stupid question," Meredith relented, checking her watch for the umpteenth time in a row. "I wish Derek were here. We would always spend our free time having sex in his office."

"Go call him up and have some phone sex. You two are kinky like that," Cristina said.

"That's flattering, but he's home with Lilly. Not sure phone sex would work when he's in the middle of singing the ABCs and changing diapers," Meredith said, fixing her ponytail. "Lilly's so close to getting her first tooth, too. She's like a little adult. It actually makes me cry."

Cristina spun around on the counter and stared at her friend blankly. "She's six months old, Mer."

"Five days from now, she'll be seven months old," Meredith said. "I feel like she should still be kicking me from the inside. I miss that."

"Have another one," Cristina shrugged simply.

Meredith smiled. "Sometimes I think about it. Not that I want to start the baby-making tomorrow or anything; I just think about having one sooner rather than later. Derek and I planned to start trying again a little over a year from now, but sometimes, I think we should just go for it, you know? Why wait? Especially now that..." she said before stopping herself, almost spilling the beans about Bridget's pregnancy when she swore to keep it a secret.

"What?"

"Now that residency is almost over," Meredith corrected.

"Makes sense," Cristina admitted.

Meredith cocked her head and smirked. "Do you mean that, or are you mocking me?"

"No, it does. If we still had a few years of residency ahead of us, I'd ask if you were high on something, but I get it. Not the whole desire to house a mini human for nine months and then push it out of my vajayjay, but I see where you're coming from. Did you tell Derek any of this?" Cristina asked.

"No. I think he's probably thinking the same thing I am, but he's afraid to say it because I'm the one who has to do the housing and the pushing," Meredith said.

"Tell him, then. Chances are, he does feel the same way. Knowing you two, he'll knock you up tonight," Cristina said.

Meredith shook her head. "There will be no knocking me up for at least a few months. And that's only if we talk it over and decide to have one sooner. Right now, this is all just hypothetical. Maybe I'll talk to him tonight, get a sparkly game plan in motion for the New Year," she said.

"Did you just say sparkly?" Cristina asked in disgust.

Meredith leaned back in her chair and giggled. "I've been in the ER for eighteen hours. I'm getting delirious."

...

At home, Derek lay sleeping on the couch, making the most of Lilly's nap time by taking his own. Lilly was snoozing away on top of him, her head on his chest. The sound of his heart beating and the rhythmic inhale and exhale of his breathing always lulled her to sleep, something that came in handy when trying to combat her teething woes.

Just as Derek was adjusting his position to get more comfortable, he heard a knock at the front door, and he opened his eyes. "Hang on, Charlie. I'm coming," he yawned, getting off the couch and following the dog. He gently maneuvered Lilly so that her head was resting on his shoulder, hoping she would stay asleep.

He padded into the foyer and saw Mark standing on the other side holding a large cardboard box. Derek put his finger to his lips to signal that he needed to be quiet, then opened the door for him.

"Hey," Derek said in a hushed tone.

"Morning, sunshines," Mark said just as quietly as he set the box down on the floor. "All of your boat equipment keeps getting sent to my house because Meredith had it shipped there so you wouldn't see it. Figured I'd come by and drop it off because I was getting tired of looking at it."

"Thank you," Derek said, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Lilly and I got up early to deal with teething drama, so we had a longer than normal nap."

Mark followed Derek into the living room, smiling at all of Lilly's Christmas toys, still sitting under the tree. "She finally opened all her presents, huh?"

"Yeah. It took her a few days, but she did it. Mer and I were very proud," Derek grinned.

"Where is Mer?" Mark asked.

"She was on-call last night, but her shift's over soon, which is why I'm glad you woke me up. I dropped her off yesterday because it was snowing, and she hates driving in snow, so I need to go pick her up," Derek said, carefully laying Lilly in her swing then buckling her.

"Bridget's up there now to see Halloran. I could see if she could hang around to give Mer a ride, so you wouldn't have to drive up there," Mark offered.

Derek looked at Mark in concern. "What's the matter? Is Bridget alright?"

"Yeah, she's just getting a routine blood test. It's not for an ultrasound. I wouldn't miss that for anything," Mark said as he dropped down onto the couch.

"Better than any movie, isn't it?" Derek said with a smile, kissing Lilly's tiny forehead.

"Hell yeah it is."

"Sure, you can give Bridget a call. If she doesn't mind, I'll call Meredith and ask her. I doubt she'd care either. If Bridget's already finished, tell her to check the ER. I'm sure Mer's looking for a reason to bolt out of there," Derek chuckled.

"Okay," Mark nodded, pulling his phone from his pocket. He got up off the couch and headed for the kitchen to avoid waking Lilly, but by the time he got there, Lilly's blue eyes peeked open, scanning the room for her dad. When she saw him folding a blanket, she made a tired babbling sound at him.

Derek turned around when he heard his daughter's sweet, little voice. "Hey, Princess. You look refreshed," he said. "Guess what? Mommy's gonna be home soon."

Lilly smiled when she heard the word 'Mommy,' and Derek knelt down to unbuckle her from the swing she'd only been laying in for a few minutes. "Yeah. I bet she can't wait to see you, either. She always misses you when she's at work. How about while we're waiting for her, I give you a bath and put you in your Giants outfit. It matches my shirt; Uncle Mark's, too. I can't wait to see Mommy's reaction to that."

Lilly giggled at him as though she understood, causing Derek to laugh, too. "Okay, then. That's what we'll do."

Mark walked back into the living room, sidestepping Lilly's toys. "Bridget was actually talking to Meredith when I called. Mer was heading toward the resident lounge to change just as Bridget was walking to the elevator to leave, and they bumped into each other. They should be here soon," he relayed.

"Okay, good; thanks," Derek said gratefully, handing Mark the remote so he could turn on the TV. "Lilly needs a bath, so you can hang out down here if you want. I won't be long."

"What, you think I can't handle bath time? 'Cause I can," Mark said as he set the remote on the end table. "Plus, I'm gonna be a dad in a few months. I could use the practice."

"Like baby boot camp? Fine, I'll let you do it. I'll supervise," Derek challenged.

Mark nodded in agreement. "I can do that," he said, following Derek toward the stairs. "Wait, does she like baths? Or is she one of those babies that freaks out at the sight of water like a cat?"

Derek laughed. "She loves the tub, actually," he said. "But it's all about the timing. If you leave her naked too long before getting her in the tub, she'll get cold and pee on you. I've been peed on enough to know."

"Maybe you should do it," Mark said, unsure he wanted to risk getting peed on and suffer Derek's subsequent mocking.

"No turning back now. You'll be fine. It's easy," Derek said. He led Mark into the bathroom, then pointed to Lilly's baby tub sitting on the counter. "Okay, fill that up halfway with water that's a little warmer than lukewarm," he instructed.

Mark turned on the faucets, putting his hand under the water stream until he found the right temperature. "Is this okay?" he asked.

Derek stuck his hand under the faucet, then nodded in approval. "Yeah, that's good."

"Okay," Mark said, starting to fill up the pink tub. "You know, I'm glad you have a kid. Makes it easier on me. You're like the walking encyclopedia of fatherhood."

"Soon enough, you will be, too," Derek said as he unsnapped Lilly's pajamas. "I remember how nervous I was before Lilly was born. The more Meredith's belly grew, the more real it became. Before I knew it, she was in labor, and after a few pushes, there was Lilly. The second I saw her, all of the fear went away. Parent mode kicked in, and all I could think about was how much I loved her. The same thing will happen to you."

"You think so?"

"Yeah I do," Derek said sincerely, holding Lilly close so she wouldn't get cold. "And in the meantime, Lilly is happy to help you practice your parenting skills."

"Alright, come here, Lilly," Mark said, holding his arms out for her. "Please don't pee on me."

Derek decided to help him out, taking Lilly's diaper off before handing her to Mark, lessening the chance of an accident. Mark quickly placed her in the tub, making sure her body was covered by enough water to keep her warm. He went right to work, taking the tiny bucket and gently pouring water over her upper body.

"See? I didn't even have to tell you what to do. You're a natural," Derek complimented, leaning against the bathroom counter. "To do her hair, just lean her forward and tip her head back a little so you don't get water in her eyes."

"Got it," Mark said, following Derek's instructions carefully. Lilly babbled up at him as her toes splashed in the water, and Mark smiled at her. "You're a little heart breaker, kid. I mean, I'm the last one to ever pump your Dad's ego, but I'll give credit where it's due."

"She's such a sweet baby. Happy, easygoing, funny, smart. She makes me want to have a dozen more," Derek said, handing Mark Lilly's baby shampoo.

Mark squirt some into his palm and set the bottle on the counter. "Why not? There's enough room in this woodland mansion you built," he said.

"Not sure how Meredith would feel about popping out twelve more. After seeing her go through childbirth, I'm surprised she even let me have sex with her again," Derek chuckled. "We definitely want another one. _Maybe_ we'll go for a third at some point."

"Go for it, man. Lilly wants a sibling. Don't you, Lilly?" Mark encouraged.

"I'd have another one in a heartbeat, but I don't know if we're ready. Lilly's still so young. Mer and I planned to wait until she was around eighteen months," Derek said.

Mark leaned Lilly forward and rinsed the shampoo from her hair, careful not to get any of it in her eyes. "Eighteen months is still young," he pointed out.

"Yeah, I guess. It really doesn't make a difference to me how long we wait, as long as they're close in age. If Mer wanted to start trying tonight, I'd be happy. If she wanted to wait until Lilly was two, I'd be happy. It'll happen when it's supposed to," Derek shrugged, smiling when Lilly squished some sudsy bubbles in her hand. "How many do you and Bridget want?"

"We wanna see if we survive one, especially if it's a boy. If he's anything like I was, we'll have our hands full," Mark replied, taking the washcloth Derek handed him.

"You mean doing things like putting my favorite frog into the microwave?" Derek asked.

"I never pressed start," Mark said in his defense.

Derek laughed. "You would have if Mom hadn't caught you," he countered. "Anyway, the Shepherds are female-dominated, so chances are, even if Mer and I did have a dozen kids, they'd all be girls. Might be nice if you and Bridget had a boy to throw into the mix."

"She thinks it's a boy. I'm leaning toward girl. Either way, I doubt my kid will have my hair like Lilly got yours. Bridget's a redhead in a redheaded, Irish family. I don't think even Sloan DNA can compete with that," Mark replied, gently cleaning Lilly with the soapy washcloth.

"Well, your redheaded kid will most likely be born between both of my dark haired, blue eyed ones," Derek said.

Mark grinned as he rinsed the soap off Lilly with the bucket. "They'll be a cute bunch," he said decidedly.

"Yeah, they will be," Derek agreed, taking Lilly's towel from the shelf. "All done, Princess? I have Mr. Duck ready to dry you off."

"Mr. Duck?" Mark echoed, little drops of water dripping off Lilly as he scooped her up out of the tub.

Derek smiled, wrapping her in the duck towel with the beak hood. "Baby language doesn't come with an off switch. When I was in surgery last week, I almost asked Bokey for Mr. Scalpel. I think I watch too much_ Elmo's World_."

"Yikes."

"Yeah, just you wait. Stuff like that will be coming out of your mouth in a few months," Derek warned him.

Mark dumped the tub water into the sink and squeezed the excess from the washcloth. "Looking forward to it."

"Okay, let's go get you dressed before Mommy gets home and vetoes your outfit," Derek said, walking out into the hall with Mark following behind him.

"Why? What are you putting her in?"

The two went into Lilly's nursery and Derek opened one of her dresser drawers. He reached into the back of it and pulled out the article of clothing he'd hidden there. "This," he said, holding up Lilly's baby-sized Giants cheerleading uniform that Bridget and Mark had gotten for her.

"Excellent choice," Mark said in approval.

"I think Mer forgot we even have this. I hid it behind other clothes, so it wouldn't mysteriously go missing. She couldn't care less about sports, but when it comes to rivalries, she still has Boston in her blood," Derek said, laying Lilly down on her changing table. He patted her bottom dry, then slid a fresh diaper under her. "I can't wait to see the look on Mommy's face, Lillybug."

Mark leaned against Lilly's crib. "You dress her in that, and there's a good chance you won't get laid tonight. I mean, worth it, but still."

"Oh, I'll get laid. It's a holiday. Holidays and sex were practically written into our wedding vows," Derek joked, slipping the Giants dress over Lilly's head. "This finally fits you, Lilly," he said. "Mark, there's a pair of red leggings in her second drawer. Can you get them?"

"Yeah." Mark opened the drawer and searched for the correct pair, pulling them out when he finally spotted them. "Jeez, she has a lot of clothes. There's like a rainbow's worth of leggings just in that drawer."

"Meredith got really girly during her pregnancy. I thought it was the hormones at first, but she just really loves having a little girl. We both do, but the fashion is all up to Mer. The outfits, the shoes, the headbands, all of it. Between her, all of our friends, and my sisters, Lilly's gonna need a second closet soon," Derek said, shimmying the red leggings up the baby's chubby legs and around her waist.

"A closet full of New York pride," Mark amended.

"Yeah, I'll do my best. Meredith would buy a closet full of Boston stuff just to annoy me," Derek laughed. He sat Lilly up on the changing table, then reached for her baby brush before gently combing her wet curls of dark hair.

"Giants, Yankees, Rangers, Knicks. Those are your teams," Mark told Lilly.

"Imparting your godfatherly wisdom on her?" Derek asked.

Mark nodded. "Damn right. It's part of my job. I'll tell the same thing to my own baby. Oh, and arena football is not real football, kiddo," he added.

"Okay, now that we've established that, look in that purple bin full of her hair stuff for two blue bows," Derek requested as he scooped one side of Lilly's hair into a pigtail.

"And you say pregnancy made _Meredith_ girly?" Mark mocked, rummaging in the bin.

Derek rolled his eyes. "What? I have a daughter. Dresses and pigtails are part of the package. Right, Lilly? Tell him," he said.

Meredith entered Lilly's nursery with Bridget by her side, both of them looking on in amusement. "What did we just walk in on?" Meredith laughed, her eyes traveling to Lilly's outfit. "You did not!"

"We had to. But come on, look how cute she is," Derek said, securing one of Lilly's pigtails with the bow Mark handed him.

Meredith walked over to Lilly and picked her up, hugging her close to her chest. "I missed you so much, peanut. Being on-call is no fun," she said. "Sorry Daddy and Uncle Mark dressed you in this before I could stop them."

"Now all three of us match," Mark said, gesturing to the Giants shirts he and Derek were wearing. "And minus the pigtails, she's the spitting image of Derek."

"She does look adorable," Meredith admitted, setting Lilly on her hip so Derek could do the other half of her pigtails. She kissed Lilly's cheek and breathed her in. "And you smell so good."

"Mark volunteered to give her a bath. He did great. Lilly had no complaints," Derek said as he finished the other pigtail.

"Really? I'm impressed," Bridget smiled, one hand over her stomach with its still nonexistent bump.

"She didn't pee on you, did she? Because I swear she pees on Derek like once a week," Meredith said.

Mark shook his head. "Nah, she went easy on me."

"I guess she saves the peeing for her Daddy," Meredith said, holding Lilly's foot so Derek could slip her sock on.

"I hope our kid saves the pee for him," Bridget said jokingly, pointing to Mark. "It's only fair after suffering through all the morning sickness, which sometimes lingers into the afternoon and night. The only thing that helps is the graham cracker-ginger ale combo you suggested. That's literally all I eat some days."

Derek chuckled as he put Lilly's other sock on her. "Sounds like Meredith. She carried an emergency supply everywhere we went."

Bridget opened her purse and pulled out a small bottle of ginger ale and a Ziploc bag of graham crackers. "Same here. The baby doesn't like when I drive for more than twenty minutes at a time, so I have to force myself to chug ginger ale or else pull over and puke on the side of the road."

"It gets better," Meredith promised. "Believe me, once the constant nausea wears off, the horniness sets in. And that's way more fun."

"Counting down the minutes. Today, I'm feeling pretty good, though. I was actually able to handle a yogurt without hurling," Bridget said.

"And on that note, how about we head downstairs and get the pizzas in the oven before kickoff time?" Mark said in an attempt to change the subject.

"If you can't handle a little puke talk, maybe we should pop in the extreme childbirth video we got from Lamaze class during halftime," Derek suggested, putting his hand on the small of Meredith's back as they walked into the hall.

Mark nodded in acceptance of the challenge. "I bathed a baby for the first time today, unassisted, without getting peed on. I can handle anything."

...

The football game was underway, and the score was tied going into the fourth quarter. Always true fans, Mark and Derek watched closely, yelling at the TV when the referee made a bad call, or celebrating when the Giants scored. Meredith and Bridget didn't really care who won; it was amusing enough watching two grown men make such a big deal over it.

"Intercepted! Ha!" Meredith cheered when Brady caught the pass meant for the other team. She clapped Lilly's little hands together in victory and Lilly let out a laugh.

"Yeah, yeah. Lucky catch," Mark said, biting into a slice of pizza.

"Lilly's been our good luck charm so far. They'll win," Derek said confidently.

Bridget smiled at Lilly, who sat in Meredith's lap. "I think she's more interested in the snow outside. She's been watching it the whole time."

"If it were deeper, I'd love to take her out in it. Shame it's only a dusting so far," Derek said. "As much as I want her to stay a baby, it'll be fun when she's a little older. We can go outback and make forts and snowmen and stuff. Remember the snowmen we used to build when we were kids?" he asked Mark.

"Yeah. I remember that time we made one with huge boobs and put Nancy's bikini top on it. Mom wanted to yell, but all she could do was laugh. Nancy Pants was pissed," Mark recalled.

"For the record, the boobs were Mark's idea," Derek said. He leaned over and kissed the top of Lilly's head. "Don't worry; Uncle Mark won't corrupt the snowmen we build."

"I didn't corrupt it; I made it better," Mark countered.

Bridget tapped her stomach with her fingers. "Yeah, if there's a little boy in here, I'm in trouble. He'll be putting boobs on Frosty by the time he's a toddler."

"Lilly will keep him in line, won't you, peanut?" Meredith said, letting Lilly suck on her finger, the thing she loved most to help soothe her sore gums.

"Mer's always been good at that. I'm sure Lilly will be, too," Derek said with a smirk.

Meredith smiled wryly. "Yeah, it's you against Lilly and me... and the Girl Scout troop I'll likely give birth to."

"That's okay. I'll use my charm for leverage," Derek teased, tickling the bottom of his daughter's foot. "After all, Lilly's sitting there wearing a Giants cheerleading outfit, isn't she?"

"That may be true, but the Patriots are about to get a touchdown, so it's all good," Meredith said, pointing to the TV.

Mark and Derek promptly turned toward the screen, both of them dropping their heads in defeat when a member of the team managed to run the ball back fifty yards to score a touchdown. "Come on! That was too easy!" Mark said in frustration.

Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Why didn't they tackle him?"

"Looks like Lilly needs a Patriots uniform," Bridget laughed.

Meredith smiled, giving Lilly a high five with her free hand. "I think she does."

...

It was only a few minutes until midnight, and the start of the New Year. Mark and Bridget left a few hours after the game ended so they would beat the holiday traffic getting home, which meant the house was quiet, or would be until the fireworks started going off and inevitably woke Lilly from her sleep.

Meredith made sure her penguin footie pajamas were fully zipped, then swaddled her up in a thick blanket. "Okay, let's go, Lillybug," she said softly, hoping the baby would stay sleeping.

She opened the sliding glass door and walked out onto the balcony attached to their bedroom, where Derek was pouring them each a glass of sparkling cider, their nonalcoholic, celebratory drink of choice because Meredith was nursing.

"Hey," he greeted, Charlie sitting by his feet. "Still sleeping?"

"Yeah. Can't promise that when the clock strikes midnight, but for now, she's snoozing away," Meredith nodded, making sure the blanket shielded Lilly's head from the cold.

Good," Derek said. He wrapped his arm around her and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Hmm, this was the best year ever."

"It really was."

"And it's only gonna get better. First steps, first words, first teeth, and you, finally finishing your residency," Derek said.

Meredith picked up her glass and clinked it with his. "Sounds like a good year to me," she said before taking a sip. She set the glass back on the ledge, then put her hand on his cheek. "I love you."

Derek smiled as he kissed her, her lips warm against his own. "I love you, too."

Just as they pulled away, the whistle of a firework sounded, and there was a faint pop followed by an explosion of color behind the Space Needle, visible from the back of their home. They both watched in awe for a moment, then glanced down at Lilly, whose startled, blue eyes peeked open.

"Happy New Year, Lilly," Meredith said softly, running her finger over Lilly's cheek.

"We love you, Princess," Derek whispered.

Lilly gave them both a sleepy smile and yawned, her thumb finding its way into her mouth as she went back to sleep.

"She hates thunder, but fireworks don't faze her. You're something else, Lillybug," Derek chuckled. "Happy New Year, Mer."

"Happy New Year," she echoed. "You too, Charlie."

Derek rubbed his hands together for warmth, then gathered up the glasses and the bottle of cider. "Wanna head back inside? We can open the curtains and watch the fireworks from bed."

"Yeah," Meredith agreed. She slid the door back open and stepped inside their bedroom after Charlie trotted back in, where it was toasty thanks to the crackling fireplace. "I know I tease you about being woodsy and all that, but I really love living out here."

"Pretty great, isn't it? The view, the privacy, the twenty acres of backyard. I wouldn't trade it for anything," Derek said.

"Me either."

Meredith unwrapped Lilly from her blanket cocoon, then gently climbed into bed, where Charlie had already made himself comfortable. "I think we're going to need a bigger bed," she said.

"Especially after you pop out that Girl Scout troop," Derek grinned, getting into bed next to her.

Meredith giggled, recalling the conversation she'd had with Cristina. It had been playing over and over in her mind all day, and although she didn't know what Derek's opinion was on the matter, she knew it couldn't hurt finding out. She laid Lilly on her chest and smiled.

"Derek?"

Derek muted the New Year's coverage on the TV and turned toward her. "Yeah?"

"Are you—I mean, did you... ever think about having a baby sooner? I know we agreed on trying again a little over a year from now, but I just—" Meredith said before Derek interrupted what was sure to be an adorably long ramble.

"Yeah. I have," Derek said, laughing slightly. "I was actually talking about it with Mark earlier."

Meredith blinked in surprise. "Really?"

"Yeah. We were just talking about how Lilly's getting older, and I mentioned wanting to have another one. Why? Have you been thinking about having another one, too?" he asked.

"I was talking to Cristina this afternoon at work, and told her the same thing," Meredith said, running her fingers over Lilly's back.

"I guess we both had babies on the brain today," Derek said. "Let's talk about it, then. New Year's is as good a time as any, right? When were you thinking we should start trying, ballpark?"

"I don't know. Definitely not before I'm an attending. I think that would just be too much; you know, with my boards and everything," Meredith said.

Derek nodded in support. "I'm with you on that. You've worked so hard these past five years. I don't want you to feel stressed out or distracted, like you were juggling too much at once."

"Maybe once my boards are over, then? Sometime this summer?" Meredith suggested. "What were your thoughts on it?"

"How about August? You go to San Francisco for your boards in mid-June, and you'll start your neuro fellowship in mid-July. If we start trying in August, you'll have had some time to get settled into being an attending. And if August rolls around, and we decide it's not a good time, or that we're not ready, we can always hold off. No pressure," Derek said.

"You're seriously on board with this? You're not just giving in because I'm the one with the uterus?" Meredith asked.

"Yes, I'm on board; and no, not because you have the uterus," Derek promised. He reached for her hand and squeezed. "So, the game plan is this August instead of next winter? Is that what you wanna do?"

"Why wait, right? I mean, we always said we wanted Lilly and baby number two to be close in age, and now, as long as you knock me up as efficiently as you did before, they'll be even closer," Meredith said.

Derek laughed at her word choice. "I'll do my best to be just as efficient as last time."

"Okay, then. We'll pull the goalie in August, and see what happens," Meredith said excitedly, letting out a breath. "This is kind of a huge decision. You're not freaking out or anything, are you?"

"The only thing I am right now is happy," Derek said honestly.

Lilly babbled something in her sleep as she stretched her hand, and Meredith watched as Derek leaned in and kissed each of her tiny fingers. "I can't wait to make another baby with you," she said.

Derek smiled. "Me, either."


	137. Neuro Dream Team

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned it, but I don't.**

**Ahh, sorry for the delay! Nursing school is already kicking my butt. But I'm still 100% committed to this story and every single one of you awesome readers!  
**

The holidays were over, which meant January was upon them. January was a notoriously stressful month at Seattle Grace, but this year, with Lilly now seven months old, and the race to the end of residency officially begun, it was even busier. And today was the first of many neuro surgeries Meredith was doing with Derek as part of his Christmas present.

Meredith sat on the floor of the resident lounge next to Lilly, who was on her playmat, rolling around in amusement. When she rolled onto her belly and wiggled her bottom in an attempt to push herself forward, Meredith dropped her textbook on the nearby coffee table.

"You are so cute. How am I supposed to get any studying done for my surgery with Daddy when you're just cute all the time?" Meredith laughed. She moved Lilly over slightly on the mat and lay down next to her. "It's okay. You're spending the afternoon with Aunt Cristina, so I may as well get in some Lilly time, anyway."

Lilly smiled at her mom, then went back to her task of trying to reach her Elmo doll on the other side of the mat. When wiggling didn't work, she pushed her bottom up and down like an inchworm, and made it just as far: an inch. But it was progress, and both of her parents knew that crawling was imminent.

"Good job, baby girl!" Meredith praised, pressing a kiss to her daughter's chubby cheek. "Here, how about I help you?"

Meredith pushed Elmo within Lilly's reach, and Lilly successfully grabbed him, celebrating by putting his foot in her mouth and chewing.

"Does he help your gums feel better?" Meredith asked. "I don't know what'll happen first, the day you start crawling or the day your first tooth decides to pop up. What's your vote?"

The door to the resident lounge opened, and Cristina walked in, stopping when she saw Meredith sprawled out on the floor. "What're you doing?"

Meredith quickly sat up and turned around, relieved that it was just Cristina and not Bailey, who would surely give her a lecture for not working. "Oh. Hey. I'm just studying; or, trying to. I'd much rather play with Lilly."

Cristina hung her sweater in her cubby, then came over and sat down next to them. "What big, bad neuro case did Derek find you?" she asked, scooping Lilly into her lap.

"A nine year old girl with Moyamoya disease," Meredith replied.

Cristina's mouth went agape and she blinked in surprise. "Are you freaking kidding me? Moyamoya?"

"Yeah. Derek's one of the handful of surgeons in the world that can save her. He did one back when he lived in New York, so he decided to take the case," Meredith said.

"And he's letting you take the lead on it?" Cristina asked.

Meredith shook her head. "We're doing it together. I've never seen Moyamoya before, so I can't fly solo on it. The little girl is only nine. She and her parents flew in from Portland last night, but all of her paperwork and scans arrived last week, so Derek and I have been preparing for it. He got pulled into a surgery this morning after an MVC came in, so once he's done, we're going to meet with them," she said, handing Lilly her teething ring before she decided to put Cristina's hair in her mouth.

"Moyamoya," Cristina said in awe. "You lucky B-I-T-C-H."

"I thought you hated neuro," Meredith laughed.

"No, I hate ortho. Neuro is about as exciting as watching paint dry, but it has its merits once in a while. Moyamoya is so rare. I'd give up a cardio surgery for that," Cristina admitted. "Instead, I get to watch your kid for five hours. No offense, Lilly."

"Lilly is just as much fun as any surgery. I packed her _Yo Gabba Gabba_ DVD, her wiggle penguin, light-up stackers, Take Care Teddy Bear, Elmo, and her baby doll, which we take everywhere because it's her favorite thing," Meredith said.

Cristina looked at her blankly. "The only part of that sentence I understood was baby doll," she said. "And I'm kind of freaked out that those things are part of your vocabulary."

"I'm a mommy, Cristina. I speak baby," Meredith said, taking Lilly when she reached her arms out for her.

Cristina leaned against the coffee table, wiping some spit-up off her scrub pants. "Speaking of... did you ever talk to Derek about having another one? I'm sure he offered to knock you up on the spot, right?"

Meredith smiled. "I did, actually. And no, he didn't. We both wanted to try again sooner than a year from now, so we decided that August would be a good time. Residency will be finished, I'll be an attending, and Lilly will have just turned one in June. She'd be a little over two by the time I had the next one, if it takes the same amount of time to get pregnant again," she said.

"Shouldn't take that long. You two have more sex than anyone I know," Cristina shrugged.

"Thank you?" Meredith said, accepting the statement as a compliment. "Oh, before I forget, here are my keys. You can take my car to your place because I have the car seat, and Derek I will pick her up in his car," she said.

"Okay." Cristina took the keys and put them in her pocket, then checked her watch. "My shift's over now, and Owen gets done in a half hour. I'll wait for him before we go. I know I'll need his help."

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that Cristina and Owen would be tag-teaming the babysitting endeavor. It wasn't that she didn't trust her person; she just knew that babies weren't exactly Cristina's forté, so having Owen there for backup was reassuring.

"Good; that's good," Meredith said, kissing the top of Lilly's head. "Does this make me a bad mom? Should I feel guilty?"

"Guilty for what?" Cristina asked.

"I don't know. Being away from her to do surgery," Meredith said.

Cristina shook her head. "You're not Ellis Grey, dumping your kid off at the nurses' station all day, every day," she pointed out. "It's one surgery a week. Don't feel guilty about it."

"Thank you; Derek and I really do appreciate it," Meredith smiled, glancing at the doorway when she heard footsteps. Derek walked into the room holding a patient chart, and Meredith waved Lilly's hand. "Hey. How was your surgery?"

"It went well. The guy's got a great chance of recovery. I asked Landis to close, so you and I could meet with our patient a little early. But first, I need to see my Lillybug," Derek said, taking a seat on the table.

Meredith handed Lilly to him, and he pressed kisses to the baby's cheek. "Hey, Princess," he said. Lilly laughed when she felt his stubble tickle her skin. "Are you having girl talk in here with Mommy and Aunt Cristina?"

"Screw girl talk. Moyamoya? Seriously?" Cristina said.

Derek nodded, handing Lilly his penlight to hold. "Yeah. Should be a pretty good surgery."

"You get how jealous I am, right?" Cristina asked.

"Oh, come on. You get to spend the afternoon with the smartest, cutest baby there is," Derek countered.

"That may be true, but Owen is changing any and all diapers. I refuse to get near baby feces," Cristina compromised, nearly gagging at the thought.

Meredith laughed, rolling up Lilly's play mat. "Poop isn't that scary. You could handle it if you tried."

"Nah, I'm good."

"That's the spirit," Derek joked as he fixed Lilly's pant leg. "What do you say, Lilly? Ready to hang out with Aunt Cristina while Mommy and I go do our surgery?"

Lilly babbled up at him, grabbing at his chin, and Derek kissed her hand. "Okay, good."

"All of her stuff is in this bag. I packed two bottles. She likes them heated for twenty seconds in the microwave. There's puréed strawberries and carrots in the Tupperware containers. I fed her recently, so she'll probably be hungry again in two hours. Oh, and I packed frozen bananas if she seems fussy from teething. Diapers, wipes, cream, and powder are in the side compartment. Don't hesitate to call if you need to," Meredith rambled, always overprotective when it came to her daughter.

"If I can run the ER, I'm capable of basic childcare," Cristina said, accepting Lilly after Meredith hugged her. "She's my best bud. We'll have fun, I promise."

"Okay. We love you, peanut," Meredith said.

Derek tickled the bottom of Lilly's foot. "We'll see you in a little while."

Lilly smiled at both of them, content to be with Cristina as she shook Derek's penlight in amusement. They waved goodbye, and quickly slipped out the door, breathing joint sighs of relief when there was no sign of crying on the other side. Derek put his hand on the small of Meredith's back.

"I hope she has enough patience to handle the next few hours," he said.

"She'll be fine. Owen will be there to help, too," Meredith said as they rounded the corner.

"I was talking about Lilly," Derek smirked.

Meredith laughed, nudging him with her elbow. "True. God help Cristina if that bottle comes two minutes late," she said.

"It's a shame we couldn't have secretly put in a nanny-cam. Cristina managing a rare Lilly flip out... that'd be comedy gold," Derek chuckled. "So, are you excited?"

"For the surgery? Hell yeah," Meredith said.

"Me, too."

Derek knocked briefly on their patient's door when they got to her room, then opened it, greeting the family with a smile. "Good afternoon; I'm Dr. Shepherd. This is Dr. Grey. You must be Kayla," he said, shaking the little girl's hand, then her parent's. "Mr. and Mrs. Reynolds, nice to meet you."

"Trust us, we feel blessed meet you," Kayla's father said politely.

"Kayla's been to a dozen doctors, and when they heard 'Moyamoya,' they all ran for the hills, so when you agreed to take her case, we just... we couldn't be more grateful," Mrs. Reynolds added.

"It's my pleasure," Derek said humbly, handing Meredith the chart. "So, Kayla suffered a seizure last summer, and that's when all of this started, correct?"

"Yeah. She was playing with her friends in our front yard, then she fell on the grass and started seizing. We called 911, and when she got to the hospital, the doctors misdiagnosed her with epilepsy. It runs in the family, so we figured Kayla got the gene. We were devastated, of course, but knew she could live with it. The doctors sent her home the next day, and a few weeks later, we were at the grocery store, and she had a stroke," her father said.

"Again, she was rushed to the hospital. By the time she got there, she was paralyzed on her left side. After a few days in the ICU, she'd regained most of her function, but she's still weak, even today. She had a CT done, but when the doctors saw no signs of a clot in her right hemisphere, they discharged her," Mrs. Reynolds said, shaking her head in frustration.

Meredith nodded, taking down notes in Kayla's chart. "And that's when alarm bells went off?" she assumed.

"We knew it wasn't a coincidence, but the doctors at our hospital back home kept brushing us off. We knew something had to be going on, so we took her to see a neurologist, and he did a higher level CT scan. That's when he diagnosed her with Moyamoya," Mr. Reynolds recalled, his arm around his wife in support.

"Isn't that a funny word, Kayla?" Derek asked in an attempt to make the situation less frightening for the little girl. He put the CT scan on the light box, then flipped the 'on' switch. "See here? Moyamoya means puff of smoke. That's what it looks like in these pictures of your brain."

"You know how at Christmastime, the tree lights can get all tangled up, and you have to get all the knots out? That's what Dr. Shepherd and I are going to do in surgery. And once we do that, you'll be all better," Meredith said with a smile.

"So, you really think you can cure her?" Mrs. Reynolds asked.

Derek nodded in agreement. "Dr. Grey and I have been studying her labs and scans for a week now, and we're confident we can do a full revascularization. We're going to do something called an indirect brain bypass at the base of her brain. That means we're going to use one of Kayla's scalp arteries to redirect blood flow, and within a few months, that artery will branch out into new vessels. Her brain will have all the blood it needs to work, and she'll never have another stroke or seizure."

"Tomorrow, you'll even be up walking. You could even go downstairs and eat lunch in the cafeteria. How's that sound?" Meredith asked.

"I'm scared," Kayla admitted shyly, not letting go of her mom's hand.

Derek sat on the edge of Kayla's bed and took his phone from his pocket. He pulled up one of the many pictures of Lilly, then showed it to the little girl. "This is Lilly. I'm her dad, and Dr. Grey—Meredith—is her mom. We love her more than anything in the world, just like your mommy and daddy love you. I promise we're gonna take really good care of you. Lilly's still really little, so she can't talk yet; but if she could, I know she'd tell you that you can trust us," he said softly.

Kayla smiled at the picture of Lilly, then looked to Derek and Meredith with her accepting green eyes. "Okay," she said.

"Okay," Derek echoed, patting her leg. "Oh, almost forgot. What's your favorite flavor of ice cream?"

"Strawberry," Kayla answered.

"Mine, too!" Meredith said as she gave the girl a high five. "So, after your surgery, Dr. Shepherd and I will make sure there's ice cream waiting for you. Doctors' orders."

Kayla perked up even more at that, and her smile grew. "Okay."

"Good. So, Dr. Grey and I will meet you down in the OR in just a few minutes, and before you know it, you'll be back up here," Derek said.

"Thank you," Kayla's mother said gratefully.

"It's our pleasure," Derek said, smiling at them with reassurance.

He and Meredith excused themselves from Kayla's room, and walked toward the OR hall so they could scrub in for surgery. "She's a cute kid. I feel bad for her," Derek said.

"Me, too. But you're one of the dozen people in the world capable of saving her life," Meredith said, smiling when he pulled the Clash scrub cap she'd gotten him from his pocket and put it on. "Ready to go make Lilly proud, so you can brag to her later?"

Derek chuckled, holding open the door to the scrub room for her to enter. "Let's do it."

...

Lexie yawned, setting her coffee mug on the roof of her car as she rummaged in her bag for her keys. Just as she spotted them and went to unlock her car door, she noticed Cristina a few parking spots away, trying to clip Lilly's car seat into the base. If it weren't so pathetic, Lexie would have laughed, but instead, she took her mug and walked over to her former resident.

"Need some help?" Lexie asked, trying not to mock Cristina's obvious frustration.

Cristina turned around, sighing in relief when she saw Lexie standing there. "I can't get the freaking car seat to click in the thing," she said.

"Move. I'll do it," Lexie offered as she shoved the mug in her bag. "Hey, Lilly. How about I fix this for you before Aunt Cristina has a meltdown in the parking lot?"

"Owen was supposed to leave with me, but he got pulled into another surgery, so I get to be Mary Poppins by myself for five hours," Cristina said, narrowing her eyes when she recognized potential opportunity.

Lexie finished securing Lilly's car seat, then glanced at Cristina, immediately realizing what she was hinting at by the look on her face. "Oh, come on. I just worked a thirty hour shift. You really can't handle the world's most well behaved baby by yourself for the afternoon?"

"Don't make me beg you."

All of Lexie's resolve melted when she saw Lilly smiling at her from her car seat. Even at seven months old, she could make someone smitten over her with very little effort. Lexie nodded in resignation. "Fine, I'll help you."

"Good. Get in," Cristina said, opening the driver's side door and dropping into the seat.

Lexie rolled her eyes as she closed Lilly's door, then walked around to the passenger side. "I guess that's as good as a thank you."

...

Meredith and Derek were two hours into Kayla's surgery, and so far, all was going smoothly. The first stage of harvesting the little girl's artery from her parietal lobe was completed, and with Derek's assistance, Meredith had done the initial craniotomy at the back of Kayla's skull.

Having a child on the table was always a challenge, even more so since becoming parents, themselves; but also because it was surgery in miniature, which called for more delicacy and fine-tuning of skills. But between Derek's experience and Meredith's training under him for five years, Kayla was in the very best of hands.

"Okay, Dr. Grey, now that we've removed a portion of Kayla's superficial temporal artery, what's our next step?" Derek asked as he and Meredith stood over Kayla's open brain at the OR table.

"We locate the M4 branch of the middle cerebral artery, and anastomose the superficial temporal artery onto it in order to redirect the blood flow," Meredith answered.

"Very good. Is she still within the parameters for temp. and heart rate?" Derek asked.

"All within normal limits," Kelly, one of the scrub nurses, replied.

"Okay, then," Derek said, glancing at Meredith. "Dr. Grey, which type of suture would you use and why?"

Meredith couldn't help but smirk at the question, one she'd known the answer to since she was an intern. But still, she knew it was the kind of question she'd get asked during her surgical boards coming up in June, so she played along. "I would use tenting suture, because with this type of surgery, we want to avoid intracranial bleeding post-op. Also, tenting suture is most often advised in pediatric neurosurgeries."

"Excellent," Derek said. "Tenting suture and ICG dye please, Bokey?" he requested.

Bokey handed both to Derek, and Meredith reached for the dye to help Derek differentiate between Kayla's brain and her small arteries. Instead, Derek gave her the line of suture and stepped aside.

"You want me to do the anastomosis?" Meredith asked, eyes wide in equal parts shock and confusion.

Derek nodded, gesturing for Meredith to begin the next step. "You've anastomosed coronary arteries before. You can do it here, too. It's the same procedure, only these arteries are smaller and more fragile. Just take your time and make sure you've got a good grip before you suture. I'm standing right here if you need me," he said in encouragement.

"Okay," Meredith said, releasing a breath. She moved into Derek's position and waited for him to drop some ICG dye in the surgical field. Once she had a clear view, she began anastomosing Kayla's arteries one suture at a time. Derek watched through the magnifier, in awe of how flawless Meredith's technique was, better than that of most of the seasoned neurosurgeons he'd met over the course of his career.

After completing three sutures, Meredith paused to survey her work so far. "How's this?" she asked Derek.

Derek smiled with pride beneath his mask. "You're close to putting me out of a job, Dr. Grey."

...

Lilly sat on a blanket on the floor of Cristina and Owen's apartment, engrossed in playing peek-a-boo with Lexie, who sat in front of her. Her mom and dad were better at the game than her aunt was, because they used props and had mastered the element of surprise, but Lilly didn't seem to mind Lexie's version. She giggled loudly when Lexie moved her hands away from her face, and the delighted noise made Lexie smile.

"God, she's the cutest baby ever. And I'm not just saying that because she's my niece. She really is perfect," Lexie said. "Ready to feed her?"

Cristina found the puréed strawberries and spoon that Meredith had packed for her, and set it on the table. "Have at it," she said, tossing Lexie a bib.

"If I'm feeding her, you're changing her," Lexie compromised as she picked Lilly up and propped her in the corner of the couch.

"Oh, I don't do diapers," Cristina replied, securing Lilly's bib.

Lexie rolled her eyes and handed Cristina the spoon. "What if she pooped and I wasn't here to help you?"

"That was supposed to be Owen's job, which is why I'm glad you're here. Besides, you two are related. The biological aunt should deal with all the bodily functions," Cristina stated, dipping the spoon into the strawberries. She braced herself as she guided it to Lilly's lips. "Please don't spew anything on me."

Lilly opened her mouth and accepted the strawberries, puckering her lips at the tart taste. Some of the excess dribbled down her chin, and she used her chubby hand to wipe it back into her mouth. "Seven months old and feeding yourself. Impressive," Cristina complimented her.

Lexie held Lilly's bottle to her lips, and she took a sip from it. "She's the genius baby of a neuro dream team. Of course she can. Right, Lilly?"

"Yeah, two neurosurgeons who are performing a freaking Moyamoya surgery right now," Cristina added as she gave Lilly another bite.

Lexie's mouth dropped open. "He got her a Moyamoya case? That's like a once in a lifetime surgery."

"One that I'm sure he'll be getting sex for," Cristina assumed, scooping some strawberries off Lilly's chin before they dripped onto her shirt. "I don't know how you sleep in that house, kid. You deserve a medal."

"Hot sex _and_ great surgery. I'm jealous of her life," Lexie said.

"Marrying McDreamy has its perks," Cristina sighed.

"Owen let you run the pit on New Year's Eve. That's like getting free reign of a candy store," Lexie reminded her.

Lilly opened her mouth for more fruit, and Cristina complied, giving her another scoop. "Irrelevant."

"Okay," Lexie said to appease her. "It is a cool gift, though. Plus, it gives them a chance to work together. They've barely been in the OR together since Lilly was born."

"Yeah, I guess," Cristina agreed. "Still hate her, though."

"Oh, me too," Lexie laughed, re-clipping Lilly's loose hair bow as Cristina fed her some more.

When Lilly felt Lexie fixing her bow, she took her sticky hand and reached for her hair, smushing strawberries into her tiny curls in the process. The mess was done before either Lexie or Cristina could stop it, and they looked at one another.

"Nice job," Cristina said sarcastically.

"I was fixing her bow," Lexie said in her own defense. She reached for Lilly's bag and put it on her lap. "I'll get a baby wipe and clean her hair with it."

Lilly babbled at Cristina when she delayed the next bite of food, and Cristina promptly gave her another spoonful. "Jeez; someone's impatient."

"She's a girl who knows what she wants," Lexie joked, wiping Lilly's hair.

Like clockwork, Lilly touched her hair again, swiping goopy strawberries across her forehead. Cristina cocked her head at Lexie in disbelief. "I'm this close to flicking these strawberries at you," she said with the baby spoon aimed at her.

"It's not my fault!" Lexie said. "We'll just... give her a bath."

"I don't have a tub."

"Well, we can't send her home covered in food," Lexie pointed out. "She only has a bite left. Just finish feeding her, then we'll wash her in the sink."

Cristina spooned the last bite into Lilly's mouth, then set the container on the table while Lexie gave Lilly another sip of her drink. When she was satiated and happy after her lunch, she looked at both of her aunts expectantly, waiting for them to entertain her.

Since she knew Cristina wouldn't, Lexie made the first move, picking a sticky Lilly off the couch and walking toward the kitchen. "Alright, pretty girl. Let's get a tubby," she said.

Cristina scrunched her face in disgust. "A tubby?" she mocked.

Lexie shrugged. "That's what Mer and Derek call it."

"Your mom used to be cool," Cristina told Lilly with a sigh, giving the sink a quick rinse before plugging the drain.

Lexie set Lilly on the counter, so she could undress her. "We need soap. Can you go see if they packed any in her bag? We need a towel and a wash cloth, too."

"Okay."

Lexie shimmied Lilly's socks off followed by her pants, smiling at the baby's chubby thighs. "Should I save your diaper for Aunt Cristina? I know you'd never do it intentionally, but it'd be pretty awesome if you peed on her," she joked.

"Got it," Cristina said, walking back into the kitchen with travel-sized bottles of baby soap and shampoo that Meredith had packed. "How much water goes in the sink?"

"I don't know. Up to her belly button?" Lexie suggested, pulling off Lilly's shirt. She dipped her hand into the water to test the temperature. Satisfied that it was warm enough, she took off Lilly's diaper, then quickly sat her in the sink, so she wouldn't get cold.

Lilly looked around in confusion, used to her tub at home and not a sink. She smacked her hands on top of the water, laughing in surprise when she splashed herself. "See, this is fun. You're not going to freak out, right?" Lexie asked, reaching for a cup to wash the baby's hair.

She filled it up with water, then carefully poured it over Lilly's head. A few drops rolled down her forehead and into her eyes, and she quivered her lower lip before letting out a small cry of displeasure. "Sorry, sorry," Lexie said nervously as she started wiping Lilly's eyes.

"Here," Cristina said, handing Lilly a spoon from the drawer.

Lexie's eyes went wide in panic, and she gently pried it from her hands. "Cristina, what are you doing? She could poke herself in the eye with this!" she nearly yelled.

"It's a spoon, not a steak knife. Calm down," Cristina shot back.

Lilly's crying escalated when the spoon was taken away, and tears rolled down her face. Lexie frantically searched the kitchen for something to calm her down with, and when she spotted the wash cloth sitting on the counter top, she rinsed it under the water and gave it to Lilly.

"Here, how about this? A fun, squishy wash cloth?" she said, making her best sales pitch with the hope that it would calm her down.

Lilly put it in her mouth and began chewing on it, her sadness dissipating within seconds. Cristina let out long breath, leaning against the counter. "Oh, thank God," she murmured.

After averting a full meltdown, Lexie reached for the baby shampoo and squirt some into her palm. "Since I'm basically doing everything, you so owe me drinks at Joe's later," she told Cristina.

"Fine," Cristina agreed. "But for the record? Spoons aren't that dangerous."

Lexie smiled at Lilly as she rubbed the shampoo through her hair. "You're so lucky I'm here right now."

...

Meredith and Derek followed Kayla into a recovery room after her surgery, where her parents sat waiting in anxious anticipation. They both shot up out of their seats when their daughter entered the room, sighing in relief at the smiles on her surgeons' faces.

"How'd it go? Were you able to cure her?" Mr. Reynolds asked worriedly.

Derek nodded happily. "The revascularization was a success. There were no complications. Kayla was a champ," he said.

"Thank you. Thank you both so much," Mrs. Reynolds said, pulling them both in for an unexpected hug.

"Thank Dr. Grey. She's the one who really saved your daughter's life today," Derek said, passing all of the due credit to Meredith.

Mr. Reynolds wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand, the gratitude etched all over his face and his wife's. "Thank you, Dr. Grey."

Meredith blushed at the compliment, biting her lip when she felt the eyes in the room on her. "Oh, I... thank you for trusting me. My daughter is my whole world, so I can't imagine how scary it was for you to put her life in someone else's hands."

"We've been to so many doctors, and none of them made us feel as relaxed as the two of you. And when we found out you were parents this morning, that made us feel even better. Your daughter is very lucky," Mrs. Reynolds said with full sincerity.

"Thank you," Meredith said softly.

Kayla's eyes blinked open slowly as her anesthesia wore off, and Derek smiled at her. "Hey, Kayla. How're you feeling?"

"Good," Kayla replied tiredly.

Mr. Reynolds knelt down next to his daughter's bed. "Guess what, sweetie? They made you all better."

"No more hospitals?" Kayla asked.

"No more hospitals," Meredith echoed, shaking her head.

"And guess what else," Derek said.

Kayla looked at him curiously. "What?"

Derek removed his hands from behind his back, and revealed the pint of strawberry ice cream and spoon he'd been holding. "Ice cream, as promised. The best medicine after surgery."

The little girl's face lit up in a smile as Derek set the dessert on the tray table. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome," Derek said.

"Dr. Landis is the on-call neurosurgeon, so he'll be monitoring Kayla overnight, and Dr. Shepherd and I will be back to check on you first thing tomorrow morning. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to tell the nurse, and she'll have us paged right away," Meredith said, Kayla's chart in her arm.

"Thank you," Mrs. Reynolds replied. "Thank you for everything."

"Any time," Derek said as he and Meredith excused themselves from the room.

Meredith took his hand and smiled as they headed to their respective lounges to change. "You didn't have to do that," she said.

"Do what?"

"Give me all the credit," Meredith said, depositing Kayla's chart in the bin at the nurses' station.

Derek smiled at her. "Everything I said was true. You should be proud of yourself, Meredith. I mean that," he said.

Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "Well, I have a good teacher," she pointed out, feeling her phone vibrate in her pocket. She pulled it out and read the screen. "Picture message from Lexie."

She opened the text, and touched the picture to zoom in on it. They both smiled when they saw Lilly and Cristina, both passed out sleeping on Lilly's play mat. "This is so cute," Meredith said, saving it to her phone. "I guess Lexie got suckered into babysitting duty today."

"Can you send me that picture?" Derek requested.

"For Cristina blackmail, or showing off Lilly's adorableness?" Meredith asked, sending it to him.

"Can't it be both?" Derek smirked as he pushed the button for the elevator.

"Excellent point," Meredith giggled. "I'll meet you in the lobby, then we can go get Lilly from her world class babysitter."

Derek smiled, stepping inside the elevator. "Can't wait."


	138. Sick Day

**Disclaimer: I would never kill off Mark. Ever. Clearly, I'm not Shonda 'angel of death' Rhimes.  
**

**As always, THANK YOU for your patience. It means the world to me!  
**

If there was one thing Meredith enjoyed about being on-call, it was the day after. Twenty-four hours off to recover from the chaos of the surgical unit. All she could think about as she pulled into the driveway was crawling into bed next to her husband and daughter and sleeping as long as she could. But when she walked into the house and heard Lilly crying, she sensed her day wouldn't pan out that way.

Meredith shrugged off her coat and kicked off her shoes before taking the stairs two at a time. She padded down the hall into her bedroom, where Derek was unsuccessfully trying to get Lilly back to sleep. His hair and Lilly's stuck out in all directions, and both had matching red noses to accompany the pouts on their faces. That's when Meredith braced herself for the worst.

"Hey," she greeted. "Rough night?"

Derek turned around when he heard her voice, and he attempted the best smile he could. "Hey. Yeah, you could say that," he said. "Lilly felt a little warm last night, and then this morning, I woke up feeling like crap."

Meredith reached out and took Lilly from Derek, and the baby buried her face into Meredith's chest, letting out her little sobs of discomfort. "Hi, baby girl," she said softly, feeling Lilly's forehead. "You and Daddy both have a fever?"

"I knew if I called you last night, you'd get worried and come home, but you had the solo aneurysm clipping with Nelson that I didn't want you to miss out on," Derek said, his voice stuffy with congestion.

"You should've called," Meredith replied. "Did you take her temp?"

He nodded. "Last night, it was 99.4. I took it again an hour ago, and it's 99.9. After she had some water, I gave her some baby Tylenol to help bring it down."

"Think we should call Dr. Halloran?"

"I already did. She said to give the Tylenol time to kick in, and if her fever goes up any more, we should call to make an appointment," Derek said, dropping down onto the bed.

Meredith pressed the back of her hand to his forehead and frowned. "You feel warmer than Lilly. What's your temp?" she asked.

"101. I took some ibuprofen; I'll be alright," Derek said. "I can take her downstairs if you wanted to sleep. You've got to be exhausted."

"You should be the one sleeping," Meredith countered, running her finger over Lilly's gums. "I wish she'd just get a tooth already. Her poor gums are probably so sore."

"I know. She has a little diaper rash, too. She's gonna get a tooth any day now," Derek agreed.

Meredith felt Lilly nuzzle her face into her chest, and she kissed the top of her head. "How about I feed you? Chances are, you'll fall asleep, which means we can all get some sleep," she said. She laid Lilly down on the bed next to Derek. "Can you undress her while I change into one of your button downs? I'll do the kangaroo thing. That's supposed to help."

"Okay," Derek said through a yawn. "Diaper, too?"

"Yeah. Fresh air will be good for the diaper rash. I'll risk her peeing on me," Meredith said as she put one of Derek's shirts on, leaving it unbuttoned, so she could nurse. "I think I wear these shirts more than you do."

Derek chuckled, tossing Lilly's diaper into the trash. "That's okay. You look cute in them."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "That's sweet."

"It's true."

"Thank you," Meredith smiled, sitting next to Derek on the bed. She put a pillow on her lap, then looked at Lilly, who wiped her nose on Derek's shirt. "Even when you're sick, you're still so adorable."

Derek gently passed Lilly over to her. "Yeah, she's done that a few times now. I just don't have the energy to change my shirt," he said, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms.

"That's okay. You look cute covered in baby boogers," Meredith mocked him as she helped Lilly latch. Once she started nursing, the melancholy look on her face dissolved into contentedness, and she closed her eyes.

"Yeah. It's a new trend," Derek said, resting his head on his pillow. "Want me to make you some breakfast?"

"You can't even keep your eyes open," Meredith pointed out. She used her free hand to smooth her fingers through his hair. "I love you, but you look like crap."

Derek looked up at her with a smirk. "Hmm, does that mean no kiss?" he asked.

Meredith leaned down and pressed a kiss to his warm forehead. "There. That's the best I can do until you're no longer diseased."

"You're mean when you're tired," Derek teased.

"I'll be even meaner if you infect me," Meredith told him, stroking Lilly's rosy cheek with her finger. "Really though, you can sleep. I took a nap last night at work before a trauma rolled in, so I have a little energy left in me before I pass out."

"Okay. But wake me if you need help," Derek gave in, turning on his side toward her. "Still didn't pee on you, huh?"

Meredith patted Lilly's bare bottom and shook her head. "Nope. Dry."

"I'm impressed. Although, she usually spares you and saves the pee for me."

"That's love, Derek," she said, squeezing his shoulder gently.

Derek smiled into his pillow. "I know. And I love her for it."

With Lilly peacefully nursing, Meredith gave in and let her eyes slip shut. It would be a catnap at most, but with Derek down for the count, even a few minutes would give her the extra charge she'd need to get through the rest of the day. Other than the low-grade fever Lilly had gotten after being vaccinated a few months ago, she'd never been sick. And even a medical degree couldn't trump Meredith's protective mommy brain.

It wasn't until she heard Lilly sneeze over an hour later that she woke up. She stared around blearily as her eyes adjusted to the light, then looked down at Lilly. "God bless you," she said. She took the suctioning bulb from her nightstand and gently suctioned Lilly's nose to clear some of her congestion. "Do you feel a little better, sweetpea?"

Lilly wriggled around uncomfortably, unable to fall back to sleep despite how tired she looked. Meredith held Lilly against her chest, then swung her legs over the side of the bed.

"Let's go take your temperature in your room, so Daddy can sleep," she said, tiptoeing out of their bedroom and into the hall.

After entering Lilly's nursery, Meredith laid the baby down on her changing table. "Thanks for not peeing on me, by the way," she said. She lathered diaper rash cream all over Lilly's bottom and fastened a diaper around her waist. "There. Now you can pee all you want."

Lilly reached her arms out, wanting to be held, and Meredith picked her up. "I know. Being sick is no fun," she said, taking the thermometer off the top of Lilly's bureau. She put it in Lilly's ear and waited for it to beep a few seconds later.

"100.4," Meredith read. "Out of the nineties now, which means I need to call Dr. Halloran. It's a low-grade fever, but I'd rather play it safe."

Lilly put her thumb in her mouth and starting sucking, her way of self-soothing. As sick as she felt, she was still pleasant, and Meredith smiled at her. "You're so sweet, peanut. If I were you, I'd be hardcore cranky right now."

She pulled her phone from her pocket and dialed Dr. Halloran's office, waiting for the receptionist to answer. When she finally did, Meredith jumped right in. "Hi, this is Meredith Grey. My husband called earlier about our daughter, Lilly Shepherd. She has a fever, and her temp. keeps creeping up. Right now, it's 100.4, and Dr. Halloran said to call if the medicine didn't kick in. Is there any chance I could make an appointment?" she asked.

"Unfortunately, Dr. Halloran just got paged into the hospital for an emergency surgery, and her partners are all booked for the rest of the day. I'm sure we could fit you in tomorrow morning, if that's okay," said Leslie, Dr. Halloran's receptionist.

Meredith bit her lip, bouncing Lilly in her arm. "Thanks. I'd really like to have her seen today, so she could get some stronger medicine, though. I'm going to call a colleague of mine to find out if she can see her, but if not, I'll give you a call back."

"Sure, that would be fine. I hope your daughter feels better. And don't hesitate to call back; I'd be happy to schedule something for you," Leslie said kindly.

"Thank you," Meredith said.

After ending the call, she scrolled through her contact list and tapped Arizona's name. It only rang once before Arizona answered, and Meredith could only hope she would be more helpful.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Dr. Robbins. It's Meredith. I'm sorry to bother you. Do you have a minute?" Meredith asked.

"Sure, what's going on? Is everything okay?" Arizona said, the hustle and bustle of the hospital evident in the background.

"Yeah. Well, kind of. Lilly's had a fever since last night, and it keeps going up. It's a little over a hundred now, which I know isn't too serious, but the acetaminophen Derek gave her doesn't seem to be working. Dr. Halloran got paged for surgery, so I was hoping you might be able to see her. If not, I understand," Meredith said, tucking the phone under her ear to disentangle her hair from Lilly's fingers.

"Absolutely. I'm just going to change now, so if you wanted, you can bring her over to my place. Chances are, it is just a fever and nothing more serious, but it's good to be sure. I'll run down to the hospital pharmacy for some baby ibuprofen before I go. How's a half hour sound?" Arizona said.

Meredith smiled in relief. "That would be great. Thank you. I know you're a pediatric surgeon and not a pediatrician, but you seemed like the logical one to call. Are you sure you don't mind?" she rambled.

"No, not at all. Winter is the most popular time for bugs like this to be spreading around, so it's good to take care of it early before it develops into something more serious."

"Yeah, whatever Lilly has, she passed it along to Derek. I should probably be quarantined," Meredith joked, opening Lilly's drawers. She grabbed a pair of fuzzy duck pajamas and put them on the changing table.

"Oh, no. Sounds like a lot of fun over there, huh? Does he have Motrin? If not, I'll snag him some while I'm getting Lilly's meds," Arizona offered.

"I think that's what he took. He was up most of the night with Lilly, so he's getting some well-deserved sleep. He'll be fine, though. We're both more concerned about Lilly. She's never had a fever this high before," Meredith said.

"I'll get him some, anyway. You can always keep it for later if you need it," Arizona shrugged. "One of the perks of working at a hospital. Lots of freebies."

"You really don't have to do that. I'm already grateful that you're going to check Lilly out. I'll do your scut work for a month," Meredith said guiltily, laying Lilly down on the changing table to dress her.

Arizona laughed. "I'm happy to help. And Lilly's such a sweetheart; this gives me a reason to see her again," she said.

"Thank you. I really appreciate it," Meredith said with gratitude.

"No problem. I'll see you in a bit."

"Okay, sounds good. Bye," Meredith replied. She dropped her phone onto the rocking chair, then smiled at her daughter. "That was pretty lucky, Lilly," she said.

Meredith zipped Lilly's pajamas after weaving her arms and legs through the holes, than sat her up to do her hair. She managed to scoop it all into a small bow, smiling at her unruly curls. "Still having a good hair day, even with a fever. Why does that never happen to me?"

Lilly babbled at Meredith as though she were giving her an answer, and Meredith kissed her forehead. "I guess it's not enough to marry into the Shepherd family. You have to be born into it," she said. "Okay, let's go leave a note for Daddy, then we'll go. Maybe when we're finished with Arizona, we can go to the supermarket to buy some soup for him. I'd make it myself, but why add insult to injury, right?"

...

The drive to Arizona's apartment was quick, but full of tears. Normally unfazed by her car seat, Lilly wasn't so thrilled about sitting in it today, much preferring the comfort of Meredith's arms. Meredith found the closest parking space she could find, then cut the engine, working at warp speed to gather her bag and Lilly's before unbuckling her from the car seat in the back. She made sure her coat was zipped and put up her hood to protect her from the January cold.

"Okay, all set," Meredith couldn't help but yawn as she took Lilly from the car. "I used to be able to handle forty-eight hour shifts like they were nothing. I think I lost my all my intern fire, Lillybug," she said.

Lilly buried her face in Meredith's chest and whimpered, clinging to her coat. "I know, baby girl. When we get home, we can have more kangaroo time and watch Nemo, okay?" she said, grateful that Lilly's favorite movie was still archived in their Tivo recordings.

Meredith quickly walked into the apartment building, making a beeline for the elevators. On another day, she may have been game to jog up five flights of stairs to get to the fifth floor, but not today. The doors opened almost immediately, and Meredith stepped inside, hitting the '5' button. She shifted Lilly to her other hip, watching the numbers light up with each passing floor.

The momentum of the elevator gave Lilly a tickle in her stomach, and she let out a small laugh of delight at the feeling. "There's my favorite sound," Meredith said.

When the doors opened, Meredith stepped off and made her way to the end of the hall where Arizona and Callie's apartment was, across from Cristina and Owen's. She knocked twice before Arizona opened the door, greeting them both with a smile.

"Hey, come on in," Arizona said, stepping aside so they could enter.

"Thanks. I know this is a lot to ask, so I really appreciate it," Meredith said as she shimmied off Lilly's coat.

Arizona took Lilly from Meredith so she could remove her own coat and set her bags down. Lilly looked up at Arizona's semi-familiar face, then back at Meredith. Confident that her mom was staying put, Lilly decided spare them all more tears.

"No, it's no problem at all. I'll just do the standard check-up to make sure it's nothing more than a fever, and if it looks like an infection, I'll call in some antibiotics for her," Arizona said, sitting Lilly in the corner of the couch.

Meredith sat on the other end where Lilly could see her, smiling at her daughter in reassurance. "Okay; thank you," she said.

The door to Arizona's apartment busted open, and Cristina walked in, mug in hand, clad in pajamas. "I need coffee. We're all out."

Arizona pointed to the kitchen area. "Help yourself," she said.

"Nice jammies," Meredith said.

"I'm working the night shift all week, so I have to force myself to sleep in broad daylight. I hate being nocturnal. It's unnatural," Cristina groaned as she trudged into the kitchen. "Wait, why are you here?"

"Lilly's sick. Dr. Robbins agreed to take a look at her, since I couldn't schedule anything with Dr. Halloran until tomorrow," Meredith explained.

Cristina glanced over at Lilly and frowned. "What's wrong with her?"

"Fever. Or, I hope it's just a fever. Derek's got it, too, so my house is like a germ carnival right now," Meredith said, fighting off another yawn.

Arizona shined her penlight into Lilly's mouth to check her throat, then quickly removed the tongue depressor before Lilly could protest. "Her throat looks just fine. No signs of strep."

"Good. That's good," Meredith exhaled.

"Are you sick?" Cristina asked.

Meredith shook her head. "No. Tired, but not sick," she answered.

"You're welcome to go pour yourself a cup of coffee. We're always well-stocked, since Cristina treats us like a free coffee house," Arizona joked as she examined Lilly's ears.

"I wish. Lilly prefers to nurse when she doesn't feel good, so I really shouldn't drink any. Thank you, though," Meredith declined regretfully, craving the caffeine that Cristina was currently sipping.

"How do you get through residency and not drink coffee?" Cristina asked, the mere thought baffling her.

"It's hard," Meredith admitted. "I mean, I can drink it in small amounts, but I don't chug it anymore like I used to. Lilly trumps my caffeine addiction."

"I'd have to hire a wet nurse if I had a baby. That's what they're called, right? Wet nurses?" Cristina said, dropping down onto the adjacent couch.

Meredith eyed her friend strangely and laughed. "Yeah, you do that," she said, her eyes trailing to Lilly, who whimpered when the cold diaphragm of Arizona's stethoscope touched her skin.

"I'm sorry, pretty girl. Almost done," Arizona said, moving the stethoscope from Lilly's front to back and listening to her breathe. "No wheezing. Lungs are clear. She just sounds congested."

"No infection or anything?" Meredith asked.

"Nope, just a fever. And she's teething, too, which would make any baby extra fussy when she's sick," Arizona said as she fixed Lilly's pajamas. "The meds. I got for her should knock it right out. She'll probably even feel a little better by tonight."

"Thank you," Meredith said, picking Lilly up. Lilly immediately cuddled into her, her cheek resting on Meredith's chest. "You did so good, peanut."

"All she did was sit there," Cristina said, confused.

"Exactly. I expected a meltdown," Meredith said.

Cristina narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "Has she ever melted down? I don't think I've ever seen that happen."

"Believe me, it happens. Not that often, but when it does, it's bad," Meredith said in good humor.

"Well, this should help to prevent any meltdowns," Arizona said, taking the medicine from her bag. "It's ibuprofen, so it's a little stronger than the acetaminophen she had earlier. Plus, it's an anti-inflammatory, so it'll help soothe her gums, too. I got her the kind in the dropper, so you don't have to use a spoon. Fill it up to the 1.25 milliliter line, then just squirt it on the inside of her cheek. She can have it every six hours. Do you want me to give her the first dose?"

"Oh. Sure, if you want. Thank you," Meredith said, positioning Lilly on her lap.

Arizona shook the bottle before squeezing the correct dosage into the dropper. She smiled as she tapped it against Lilly's lips. "Mmm, I have some yummy grape medicine that's gonna make you all better," she said temptingly, though Lilly was hesitant to give in without a fight.

She tipped her head back toward Meredith, looking at Arizona like she was crazy. Cristina laughed at Lilly's stubbornness and raised her coffee mug in support. "That's it, Lilly. Give her hell," she encouraged.

"Cristina," Meredith scolded. She tickled Lilly's belly with her hand in an attempt to get her to smile, and when she did, Arizona seized the opportunity, squeezing the few drops of medicine into Lilly's mouth.

Lilly puckered her lips at the slightly sour grape flavor, but swallowed it anyway. "Good job, peanut," Meredith praised, offering her a drink of water from her bottle. Lilly eagerly sipped to get rid of the taste in her mouth, then pushed the bottle away with her hand when she was finished.

"She's feisty when she's sick. I love it," Cristina chimed in.

"Which is why Derek is passed out sleeping at home. They had a long night. Being the parent without the boobs is rough when all Lilly wants to do is nurse," Meredith said as she ran a soothing hand down Lilly's back.

"Oh, that reminds me; I have Motrin for him," Arizona said, rummaging around in her bag until she found the pill box.

Meredith smiled, tucking it away in her purse along with Lilly's medicine. "I owe you one. Well, more than one. A lot. Seriously, charts, labs, anything. I'll do it," she rambled.

"I'm just glad I could help. Don't feel like you owe me anything," Arizona said. "I remember how tough the last few months of residency were, and I didn't have a baby on top of everything else. Any time I can help, I will."

"Thank you. I um... that means a lot to me," Meredith said.

"Absolutely."

"Where to now? Back home to spoon-feed McDreamy some Jell-O?" Cristina asked.

Meredith smiled wryly at her. "Funny," she said. "Actually, I was going to head to the grocery store for soup."

"I have soup. I had a coupon, so I bought like ten cans. Go rummage my cabinets for some," Cristina offered, taking another sip of her coffee.

"If it'll save me a trip, I'll gladly rummage your cabinets like a beggar. Thank you," Meredith accepted.

"You clip coupons?" Arizona asked, incredulous.

"I was off one day a few weeks ago and got sucked into an _Extreme Couponing_ marathon, so I tried it. I saved forty-three dollars," Cristina boasted.

Meredith nodded, trying to hide her amused disturbance. "Impressive."

...

It was early afternoon when Meredith arrived home with Lilly, though it felt more like midnight should be fast approaching, given that Meredith barely had enough stamina to get Lilly out of the car and take the five steps into the house. She slung their bags over her shoulder, then retrieved Lilly, who was finally feeling well enough that she dozed off in her car seat on the way home.

"I'm sorry to wake you. Go back to sleep, baby girl," Meredith cooed, bundling Lilly under her blanket.

She shut the car door and hit the lock button on her key fob, then walked along the stone path up to the door. Just as she was jingling her set of keys to find the right one, the front door opened.

"Oh, thank God," Meredith murmured.

Derek held the glass door open for her and Lilly, stepping aside to make room for them. "Hey," he said, his voice still thick with sleep.

"Hey," Meredith echoed, taking off Lilly's coat, then her own. "You look better. Tired, but better."

"Just woke up a few minutes ago. You should've let me take her over there. You can barely keep your eyes open," Derek said, following her into the living room.

Meredith gently laid Lilly in her swing and turned it on, hoping the motion would lull her back to sleep. She pressed a kiss to her forehead before turning around. "You were out cold. Plus, you were worse off than Lilly was. You needed sleep," she said.

"So did you."

"Derek, I've been sleep deprived for five years. I'm used to it," Meredith pointed out.

"Still."

Meredith sighed in frustration. "Still what? Her fever kept going up, and I wasn't about to ask Robbins to make a house call, so I drove her over there. She checked her out, gave her some medicine, and some for you, too. Now, are we going to fight about this, or can we let it go? Because really, I'm not in the mood to argue."

"Okay, okay. Sorry," Derek said, backing off to avoid an unnecessary conflict. "I was just worried."

"I know. I'm sorry for snapping. But my mommy mode is in overdrive because she's sick, and I had to do something," she said. She wrapped her arms around him and breathed him in. Derek's body was always like a furnace, and with her cheek pressed to his chest, she was certain she could fall asleep if she closed her eyes. "I have soup for you."

"Yeah?"

"Mhm," she said into his tee shirt. "Cristina gave me some. Italian wedding. You like that kind, right?"

"One of my favorites. Thank you," Derek said as he ran his hands up and down her back. "I'll share with you."

Meredith smiled. "Date night on the couch?"

"More like date afternoon, but yeah. It's still like a date," he agreed.

"Feels like nighttime," she said with a yawn.

Lilly babbled at them from her swing, and they spun around to face her. "Hey, peanut. I thought you'd be out for hours," Meredith said.

"She looks happier," Derek said when Lilly smiled sleepily at both of them. "There's the best smile in the world. I missed it."

Meredith blinked in surprise, unsure if she was just catching the fever and its accompanying delirium, or if her eyes were deceiving her. She knelt down in front of Lilly and wiggled her mouth open to double check, and sure enough, there it was. A tiny tooth had finally popped free from her bottom gums.

"Lilly! You have a tooth!" Meredith shouted softly.

Derek quickly dropped to his knees beside her. "Does she really?" he asked. When he saw the tooth, he grinned with pride. "That's my girl! I told you that tooth would be showing up any minute. Now they'll be popping up like weeds."

"I swear it must have happened in the car on the way home. Arizona checked her throat an hour ago, and there was no tooth in there," Meredith said excitedly. "January 14th. Remember the date, so we can mark it in her baby book."

Derek pulled his phone from the pocket of his pajama pants. "Can you smile for Daddy, so I can get a picture?"

Meredith tickled the bottom of Lilly's foot. Lilly smiled on cue, displaying the little tooth she seemed so proud of, giving Derek the chance to snap the picture. "You look beautiful, Princess."

"Can you send that to me?" Meredith asked as she glanced at the photo.

"Yeah."

Meredith scooped Lilly out of her swing and hugged her. "You look so grown up now."

"She really does."

Lilly tugged on a tuft of Meredith's hair and put it in her mouth, and Meredith winced, gently removing it from the baby's grasp. "Lilly, Mommy's hair is so dirty. Actually, the rest of me is dirty, too."

"Oh, I'm well aware."

Meredith smirked at him. "Haha," she said wryly. "I could really use a shower before our soup-on-the-couch date night. Maybe when I'm done washing off, you could pass Lilly in to me. Steam is supposed to help, so I'll just stand in there with her for a few minutes."

"Hey, I'm congested, too. When do I get to take a steamy shower with you?" Derek joked.

Meredith laughed as she walked toward the stairs. "You can sit on top of the toilet seat lid while I'm in there with Lilly. It'll be like a sauna. You'll feel better," she compromised.

"Kind of a downgrade from hot shower sex, but okay," Derek said.

"Once you're not sick anymore, I'll give you hot shower sex, bendy thing and all," Meredith promised him, reaching the landing of the upstairs hallway.

"Deal."

They headed for their bedroom and into the en-suite bathroom. The prospect of a shower hadn't been this tempting since Meredith had given birth to Lilly, and she could barely contain her joy when they reached their destination. "Daddy's gonna hold you while I get cleaned off, then I'll take you, okay?"

"How's that sound? Wanna get a pseudo spa treatment?" he asked. Derek reached for Lilly and dropped down onto the closed lid of the toilet seat with her on his lap.

Just as Meredith was about to pull off her old clothes, her phone rang from inside her pants pocket. She braced herself, hoping it wasn't a page to go back to work. Already running on fumes, she knew she wouldn't be able to pull off another shift so soon. She read the display before answering. "Nelson," Meredith said, accepting the call. "Hello?"

"Dr. Grey, it's Dr. Nelson. Listen, we have a neuro trauma coming in. Skull fracture and subdural hematoma. I know you just finished a shift, but I wanted to give you first dibs," Nelson offered.

Derek overheard the call and nodded in support. "You can go in," he mouthed.

"I'm grateful for the opportunity, but Lilly is sick, and so is Derek, so I have to decline. I'm sorry," Meredith said without hesitation.

"Oh, not a problem. I just had to make sure before I asked someone else to scrub in," Dr. Nelson said. "I hope Dr. Shepherd and Lilly get well soon."

Meredith smiled. "Thanks so much. I really appreciate it," she said.

After they said goodbye and hung up, Derek cocked his head at her. "Mer, you could've gone in if you wanted. Lilly and I can manage," he said.

"Really? After the spiel you just gave me, you want me to stand over an open brain?" Meredith asked in amusement.

"Well, you could always just observe. I would've driven you there if you were too tired," Derek upheld.

"I didn't want to. Besides, I'd probably fall asleep at the OR table. Literally," Meredith replied, kicking off her jeans.

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I want to be here," Meredith said. "You two are more important to me than any surgery."

Derek offered Lilly his finger to chew on, and she happily accepted it, putting it in her mouth. "The apple didn't just fall far from the tree. It fell, then rolled far, far away from it," he complimented.

Meredith smiled slightly as she turned on the shower nozzles. "My mom never stayed home with me when I was sick. I can't imagine ever choosing work over Lilly, especially when she's not feeling well."

"What? What'd she do?" Derek asked, unsure if he even wanted to know. Opening the Ellis Grey vault of motherhood rarely left him with fond feelings for the woman, but it made him even prouder of his wife, who, besides inheriting her surgical talent, was the exact opposite of her in every way.

"When I was six, I got a really bad fever. My mom and I had just moved to Boston. We didn't really know the neighbors yet, and my mom hadn't gotten the chance to hire a babysitter, so she had no choice but to bring me to work. She dumped me off at the nurses' station. I guess she figured they had nothing better to do than watch her sick kid," Meredith said, tossing the rest of her clothes in the hamper.

"So, you just sat there all day?"

Meredith shrugged, stepping into the shower, then closing the curtain. "Well, the nurses felt bad, so they took care of me. They found a spare room and let me hang out in a patient bed. They got me meds., ordered up food for me, and let me watch cartoons. My dad was always the one who did that stuff back in Seattle, so it was nice. You know, having people take care of me."

"That's really sad," he said.

"You wanna hear sad? I should tell you the story about me getting my first period," Meredith said from inside the shower, lathering shampoo through her hair.

"Another gem from the Meredith Chronicles?" Derek asked.

"Yep. It was summer, and I'd just turned thirteen. I was the last of my friends to get it, so when I did, I was really excited. I went downstairs to tell my mom. She was getting ready for work as usual, and didn't have a minute to spare for me. Any guesses what her response was when I told her?" Meredith said.

Derek braced himself in anticipation. "Oh, jeez. What?"

"She said 'it's about time; supplies are in the bathroom cabinet,'" Meredith recalled, squirting some soap onto the loofah. "Oh, and as an afterthought on her way out the door, she told me not to come home pregnant."

"You were thirteen."

Meredith laughed in spite of herself. "Yeah, well, that was all the motherly wisdom she imparted on me. No 'congratulations on becoming a woman' or anything. That's it."

Derek frowned, sadness for her hitting him like a brick, no matter how long ago it happened. He pressed a kiss to the top of Lilly's head. "That story makes me want to cry, Mer," he admitted.

"Why?"

"Because that's a big deal. My mom always made that day special for my sisters. I mean, they were mostly mortified, but still. It should be a happy memory," Derek said.

Meredith opened the shower curtain slightly, so she could take Lilly, and she smiled at both of them. "That's why I'm glad we made a little girl. Because when you become a woman, Lilly, we're celebrating. You and I will go out and buy girl products, then get ice cream and go to the mall or whatever. And you'll be mortified, too, but that's okay."

Derek smiled at the thought, unzipping Lilly's pajamas and tossing her old diaper in the trashcan. He stood up and handed her to Meredith. "Parental embarrassment is a rite of passage. And it's just because we love you, Princess."

Lilly didn't seem to mind much about the future embarrassment they'd bestow upon her; instead, she just kicked her legs in excitement. Meredith hugged her close, so she wouldn't slip.

"Got her?" Derek asked.

"Yeah."

Derek sat back down, propping his feet on the shower ledge. "Most babies hate water. Well, showers at least. We lucked out," he said. "Maybe that's where we conceived her."

"Derek."

"What? It's possible. Our baby making attempts weren't just limited to the bed," Derek pointed out.

"True," she said, Lilly's face resting on her chest. The baby let out a sigh and closed her eyes, enjoying the steam of the shower and her mom's warmth. Meredith kissed her forehead. "I know I'm probably just loopy from being so tired, but I kind of wish it was August," she admitted.

Derek furrowed his brow in confusion. "Why?"

"Because we'd be working on making Lilly a brother," Meredith said, one hand cupping Lilly's little bottom and the other splayed over her back.

"Shooting for a boy this time, are we?" he asked amusedly.

"That's up to you and your swimmers. But I have a feeling Bridget and Mark are having a boy, so either way, someone's probably going to be outnumbered."

"What if we make twin boys?" Derek pondered out loud, waiting for her reaction.

Meredith's laughed echoed behind the curtain. "Then you and I are going to get peed on way more than we do now with Lilly."

"You mean _I'll_ get peed on," Derek assumed.

"Yes."

"We could get started today if you wanted. Maybe if we're diligent enough, I could have you knocked up by Valentine's Day," he said.

"As tempting as that sounds, I'd really rather not have you sneezing all over me while we're doing it."

Derek feigned offense. "Ouch. Getting meaner."

"Hey, I just stripped in front of you to make you feel better. I think that's very kind," she replied, peeking her head out of the shower and smiling at him. "Is the steam helping you at all?"

"Yeah, it is," he nodded.

"You look better. Kinda sexy, actually," Meredith complimented.

"Hmm, even all pale and scruffy?" he said with self-deprecation.

"Yes, even all pale and scruffy," she echoed.

Derek chuckled. "Are you sure you're not coming down with a fever, too?"

"I better not be," Meredith said. "Actually, I've always found sick Derek kind of adorable."

"Really? Me blowing my nose turns you on?" Derek asked with feigned arrogance.

"Not like that. I just mean that you're always the one taking care of me, so I like taking care of you. You know, paying you back or whatever," Meredith said, swaying her hips from side to side out of habit as she rocked Lilly.

"I'm happy to do it."

"Me, too."

"I'm sorry you went through all of that as a kid though, Mer. No one deserves that," Derek said.

"It's okay. I learned what _not_ to do as a parent, so in its own backwards way, maybe it's a good thing. As long as I do right by Lilly, that's all I care about," Meredith said, smoothing Lilly's wet hair off her forehead.

He smiled. "Like I said, the apple rolled really far from the tree."

"Thank you," she said softly. She turned off the water nozzles and rung out the end of her hair with her free hand before opening the shower curtain. "All finished. I don't want her getting too hot. Can you grab her towel?"

"Yeah." Derek reached for Lilly's hooded towel off the shelf and shook it out. "Come here, Princess. Let's get dried off."

Meredith swapped Lilly for her own towel, patting herself dry. She wrapped it around herself, then stepped over the side onto the bathmat. "How about you take a quick shower?" she suggested. "You'll feel so much better afterward. Then we can have our date night."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I promised Lilly more kangaroo time and _Finding Nemo_, so we'll wait for you," Meredith said, taking a swaddled Lilly from Derek.

"Okay," Derek said. "Wait, does it have to be _Finding Nemo_ again? We just watched it last weekend."

"It's Lilly's favorite. And she got a tooth today, so we need to celebrate," Meredith said as she tried to keep Lilly from wiggling out of her bath towel.

Derek laughed, nodding in compliance for the sake of his daughter. "Nemo it is."


	139. Making a New Memory

**Disclaimer: Grey's still isn't mine.**

**I know. I suck. Fic writing (like my life in general) has taken a backseat to school, which owns me right now. Thankfully, Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming up, which I hope means a little more free time to write. Thank you as always for your patience!  
**

January 21st had been a dismal day for Derek for the past twenty-nine years. It was the day of his father's death, and while the shock had worn off, the loss hadn't. And since Lilly had come along, he felt it even more, which is why Meredith was determined to make it a good day for him.

She stood at the OR board and wrote her name and Derek's in the designated slot. So far, they had completed three successful neuro surgeries as part of Derek's Christmas gift. Until now, he'd been the one to arrange everything, from the surgery being done to the date and time. But today was different. Meredith managed to orchestrate this surgery all on her own, one that Derek hadn't done since his own residency, one that he'd been dreaming of doing again.

Meredith put the cap back on the marker and set it on the board ledge. As she turned around to head back to Derek's office, she bumped into the Chief, who was behind her.

"Oh. Sorry, Chief," Meredith apologized, blushing at her klutziness.

Richard waved it off with his hand. "No, it was my fault. I was busy reading the board. Oligodendroglioma, huh? That's quite the surgery," he said.

"Yeah. Derek's a tumor junkie. I knew he'd like this case," Meredith said.

"You found it for him?" Richard asked.

"Yeah. Kind of inadvertently, actually. I planned it all myself," she explained.

"But Derek doesn't know about it?" Richard asked.

"No. I was actually on my way up to his office to surprise him now," Meredith said, rolling her watch around her wrist out of habit. "It's just... today's the anniversary of Derek's father's death, and I wanted to take his mind off it by helping save someone's life."

"That's very kind of you, Meredith," Richard said.

"Oh. Well thank you, sir."

Richard bounced on his heels in excitement, looking like a kid on Christmas morning. "So, uh, you and Derek are still letting Adele and I watch Lilly for the day, right?" he asked.

Meredith laughed. "Yes, you are. I mean, unless you don't want to. I know you volunteered, but I don't want you to think it's an obligation," she added.

"No, not at all. We've been looking forward to it all week. All of our nieces and nephews are grown now. And Lilly is the closest we'll ever have to a granddaughter," Richard said, smiling warmly at her.

"Derek and I want you to feel that way. We want you to be a part of her life," Meredith said honestly.

Richard put his hand on her shoulder. "Thank you, Meredith."

"Of course."

"Okay, well I'll see you in an hour or so. Adele and I will meet you in my office, if that's okay," Richard suggested.

"Sounds good. Thank you, sir," Meredith agreed.

The two nodded politely at one another before Meredith continued down the hall toward the nurses' station to pick up the scans and patient chart to show Derek. After collecting both, she headed for the elevator. Derek and Lilly were taking a catnap together on the couch in his office when she snuck out to do her last minute preparations for this afternoon's surgery, and she knew they'd be waking up soon.

Meredith pressed the button for the fifth floor when she entered the elevator, and it ascended with its usual hum. Once the doors parted for her, she walked the few feet down the corridor of offices until she reached Derek's. She gently pushed the door open, smiling when she saw Derek and Lilly both stretching their limbs nearly in sync.

"Hey," Meredith said. She set the chart and scans on the coffee table and dropped down next to them on the couch. "You both looked so cute. I didn't wake you, did I?"

Derek shook his head. "Nah, we got up a few minutes ago. I wanted to have time to look over the scans before our aneurysm clipping today," he said, passing Lilly over to Meredith, then reaching for the large envelope on the table. "Is this them?"

"No, those are for a different surgery," Meredith said vaguely, kissing Lilly's cheek. "Hi, baby girl."

"New consult?" he assumed.

"Nope."

Derek looked over at her and cocked his head in confusion. "What are they for, then?"

"You," Meredith said, a coy smile on her face. When Derek didn't seem to put the pieces together on his own, she nudged her shoulder against his. "Open it."

"Okay," Derek obliged. He pulled one of the scans from the envelope and held it up to the light, his eyes widening with interest the second he realized what he was looking at on the CT film. "An oligodendroglioma tumor in the parietal lobe," he said in awe. "I haven't seen one of these in years."

"Well, today you will."

Derek removed the scan from in front of his face and blinked at her, as though he couldn't fully comprehend what she was saying. "You got me an oligodendroglioma?"

"I did," Meredith said.

"How did you... when did..." Derek sputtered.

Meredith laughed, satisfied that for once, she was the one who had him speechless. "The patient came into the pit a few weeks ago with persistent headaches and vomiting. His personal physician wrote it off as the flu, but his wife knew there had to be something else going on when he had a seizure, which is why they came into the ER that day. I did a CT and sure enough, there was a tumor in his parietal lobe. Nelson was supposed to do the surgery, but he got called to speak at a conference in Texas, so he passed it along to you, only I decided to keep it a secret to surprise you," she explained.

"You did?" he asked softly.

"Yeah. I know today is a tough, and I wanted to do something for you. Our patient is the father of two little boys. So even though you couldn't save your own dad, you're going to save theirs," Meredith said, rubbing her hand along his arm.

"Mer, this is... thank you," Derek said. When he couldn't think of something more adequate to say, he dropped the CT scan on his lap, put his hands on Meredith's cheeks, and kissed her.

"You're welcome," she murmured against his lips.

Lilly reached her hand toward their faces, watching as they kissed one another. When Derek felt her little fingertips on his chin, he regretfully pulled away. "Hmm, why is it that every time we kiss nowadays, we seem to have an audience?" he asked, tickling the bottom of Lilly's foot. She shrieked with laughter as she jerked her foot away.

"Because Lilly is attached at our hips," Meredith told him, smoothing her fingers through Lilly's dark ringlets of hair. "I guess it makes sense, though. Kissing led to Lilly, and now Lilly is around when we kiss. Full circle or whatever."

"That was poetic," Derek teased.

"My inner poet comes out when I'm deprived of caffeine," Meredith said.

"You're scrubbing in with me, right?" he asked.

"Hell yeah. I've never seen one of these. Plus, if I bailed, the Chief and Adele would probably never speak to us again," Meredith said jokingly. "I bumped into him on the way up here. I don't think I've seen him this excited since Lilly was born."

"He's smitten. Not that I can blame him. Lilly's been a heart breaker since she was in-utero," Derek said before pursing his lips. "Wait, just to clarify, there's no aneurysm surgery?"

"No, that was a decoy, just to throw you off. Obviously it worked," Meredith boasted. "We still have an hour. Want to go down and get food, so we can have an early lunch? I want to make sure I nurse her before we scrub in, and we can look over the scans."

Derek nodded, getting up off the couch. "Sure. What are you hungry for?"

"Surprise me."

"I don't think anything in the cafeteria can top an oligodendroglioma, but I'll try my best," Derek promised as he left the room with a slight spring in his step.

Meredith smiled in satisfaction, tapping her palm against Lilly's. "We got him good, peanut."

...

After eating lunch and subsequently relinquishing Lilly into the care of a very eager Richard and Adele, it was time to go meet their patient and his family in his room. Derek held the chart in one arm and pushed the door open with the other, letting Meredith walk through first.

"Thank you," she said softly. "Good afternoon, Fordhams. It's nice to see you again."

"Good afternoon, Dr. Grey," said David Fordham, their neuro patient. He reached out and shook Meredith's hand, then Derek's. "Dr. Shepherd, right?"

"Yes, it is. Hi. Good to meet you," Derek greeted, shaking his hand back, then smiling at the man's wife and children. "Mrs. Fordham," he nodded politely. "Are these your little ones?"

Mrs. Fordham nodded and wrapped an arm around each of her sons. "Yeah. Jeffrey and Max."

"Are you the superhero guy that's gonna save my Dad?" the older son, Jeffrey, asked seriously.

Derek smiled at the little boy. "That's the plan, buddy," he said, giving him a thumbs up.

"How does this work? Do you think you'll be able to get it all?" Mrs. Fordham asked nervously, wringing her hands together.

"We're going to try. See, with this type of tumor, there's a lot of fuzzy edges that make a clean resection difficult. But we're going to use a computer screen to help us map the tumor's location and avoid damage to the surrounding brain tissue," Derek explained.

"There's only so much that 2-D films can show us, so we'll have a much better idea once we're in the OR. We'll probably be able to remove about ninety percent easily. It's the other ten percent that could be challenging. But Dr. Shepherd is the best there is, and you're in excellent hands," Meredith said.

"You'll probably need radiation therapy to shrink and destroy the remaining cells left behind after surgery, but if we're able to remove that ninety percent of the tumor, you'll be in good shape. The likelihood is that you won't need more than a few rounds of radiation before you're fully tumor-free," Derek added.

"What's your success rate with this surgery?" Mrs. Fordham asked.

"One hundred percent survival. Ninety-five percent full recovery," Derek answered.

Mr. Fordham nodded slowly. "And the other five percent?"

"They had some minor loss of speech or motor control," Derek said. "But every patient is different. Every tumor is different. Luckily, we caught yours while it was still a grade II, which means it's growing very slowly. It's localized to your brain, and hasn't metastasized anywhere else. You're young, you're healthy. All of these factors work in your favor," Derek said encouragingly.

"I'll come out to the waiting room every hour to update you on our progress," Meredith said to David's wife.

"Do you have any more questions for us?" Derek asked.

Mr. Fordham glanced at his wife, and they both shook their heads. "No, I don't think so. Just take good care of me. Those little guys need their dad," he said, looking at his children.

Derek nodded. He understood more than anyone in the room just how much a child needed his father. Even after twenty-nine years, he missed his dad every day, which is why he was determined to keep Mr. Fordham alive.

"I know. Dr. Grey and I are going to return you safe and sound," Derek said, always reassuring and calm. "We'll meet you in the OR in a few minutes."

Once he and Meredith left Mr. Fordham's room and headed to the OR for his surgery, she took his hand and squeezed. "Are you okay? I know this case hits close to home."

"You know, actually I am, yeah," Derek said, squeezing back. "Ready to go save a life?"

Meredith smiled. "I am."

...

If there was one thing Meredith had learned over the past five years, it was that neuro surgeries were long, slow, and laboriously complex. But she loved every second of it, especially when she got to stand at the head of the table with Derek. She'd just finished scrubbing back in after leaving to give the Fordhams an update, and the OR doors opened with a swish.

Derek turned his head toward her briefly before returning his focus to Mr. Fordham's open brain. "I was beginning to think you abandoned me," he joked.

"Sorry. After I updated them, I called the Chief to see how Lilly was doing," Meredith said, rejoining him at the OR table. "Right now, they're out to lunch with her, then they're hitting the toy store."

"Hmm, she wears her Princess title well," Derek said, smiling under his mask.

"Right? I'm jealous," Meredith giggled. "How's he doing?"

"Still stable. The scans didn't show just how much the tumor infiltrated the surrounding tissue. If I leave it behind, there's a chance it'll grow back. But if I remove it, I could accidentally hit some major brain centers. I'm trying to decide which is the lesser of two evils," Derek said.

Meredith studied Mr. Fordham's brain, getting a close look at the remaining tumor that Derek had yet to remove. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion when she noticed a bulging artery that was almost concealed under part of the tumor remnant. "I... Derek, is that an aneurysm?"

"What?" Derek asked, using the retractor to temporarily push some of the tumor out of the way. "I'll be damned. This didn't show up on the scans."

"Because it's hiding under the tumor," Meredith said. "The only way to clip it is to take the rest of the tumor out."

"I guess that made the decision easy, then. Excellent catch, Dr. Grey," Derek credited.

"Thank you."

"Penfield 4 and a ten blade, please," he requested of the scrub nurse on his other side. She handed him the instruments and he accepted one in each hand. "Thank you," he said.

"Should I scrub out and tell Mrs. Fordham about the aneurysm? I know I just scrubbed back in, but I told her I'd keep her in the loop throughout his surgery," Meredith said.

"Tell her after you clip it," Derek replied as he began resecting the more delicate portions of the oligodendroglioma.

Meredith turned her head toward him. "You want _me_ to clip the aneurysm?" she asked.

"You found it. You should be the one to clip it."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. You've done it before. You probably knew the steps for clipping an aneurysm when you were in fifth grade," he said, checking the monitor to make sure Mr. Fordham's vitals were staying strong.

"Third," Meredith corrected.

Derek smirked. "Show off."

And when the time came for Meredith to show off those skills, she delivered without any complications. Derek watched as she worked, exposing the aneurysm, getting control of the blood flow, then applying the clip to the aneurysm neck. Once she was sure it was in place, she released it, cutting off the blood supply from the main artery. After doing the matador move, both she and Derek breathed a sigh of relief when the field was clear of any residual bleeding.

"Any better than that, and the Chief would have to replace me with you as head of neuro," Derek complimented.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Mhm."

"What? It's the truth," he upheld. "Smithson, would you like to close?"

"Sure, thank you," the neuro fellow nodded with enthusiasm as the scrub nurse began setting up the titanium plates and screws needed to replace the removed portion of the skull.

"Good work, everyone. Thank you," Derek said, taking off the loupes and headlight. He set them on the tray, then followed Meredith into the scrub room where she was pulling off her gloves.

Meredith tossed the used gloves in the trash and untied her mask. "That was amazing," she said.

"It's all in the teamwork," Derek winked, taking off his own gloves and mask. "The only thing that would've made it better is if Lilly were here."

"I miss her," Meredith frowned. She took a fresh bar of soap from the box and handed it to him before getting one for herself. "Richard and Adele haven't called, which I'm taking as a good sign."

"I'm sure she's having a blast, perusing the aisles of the toy store," Derek said as he stepped on the sink pedal, so he could wash his hands.

Meredith followed suit, scrubbing off her hands, too. "She's spoiled. Let's face it."

"Well, as long as we're not the ones doing the spoiling, I think it's okay," Derek said.

"That's a bit of a rationalization, but I'll go along with it," Meredith laughed.

Derek handed her a paper towel after she turned off the sink. "Ready to give the Fordhams some good news?"

"Yeah." Meredith quickly dried her hands off, then tossed the towel in the trash.

Derek smiled, opening the door that led into the hallway. "Okay."

They made the short walk down the hall and into the waiting area, where Mrs. Fordham and her two children were seated. Mrs. Fordham straightened in her chair when she saw them, her foot shaking with nervous energy.

"How did it go? Is he going to be okay?" Mrs. Fordham asked immediately, bracing herself for their response.

Meredith and Derek sat down in the chairs across from the family, both of them smiling to alleviate the woman's fears. "It went well. Better than well, actually. During the resection, Dr. Grey spotted an aneurysm that had developed on the underside of your husband's tumor. The only way to clip it was to take the risk and remove it all. If not, we would have had no way to get to the aneurysm."

"Oh my God," Mrs. Fordham said, dropping her head into her hands.

"But the good news is Dr. Grey was able to clip it successfully," Derek said.

"That tumor may have saved your husband's life. The aneurysm never showed up on any scans, so without this surgery, we may not have known about it until it was too late," Meredith added.

Mrs. Fordham wiped the tears from her face with the sleeve of her sweater. "So, he's going to be okay? The whole tumor is out?" she asked in disbelief.

"The whole thing. He won't even need radiation therapy now," Derek said, shaking his head.

"You made my Daddy all better?" Max, the younger child asked shyly.

"Yes, we did. Your Dad's as good as new," Meredith said.

"Dr. Grey and I scrubbed out to come tell you how it went, and the neuro fellow is just closing now. After an hour being monitored in recovery, you'll be able to meet him back up in his room," Derek said.

"Thank you. Thank you both so much," Mrs. Fordham said, standing up from her chair. "I need to hug you."

"Oh. Sure," Derek agreed, not able to get another word in before he and Meredith were squeezed tightly in the woman's arms. He smiled at Meredith over Mrs. Fordham's shoulder, and she laughed softly.

It was days like this that made Meredith remember why she loved her job, because as hard as it was to be away from Lilly, it was time well spent getting to hand a father back to his children.

"Say thank you to the nice doctors for saving Daddy," Mrs. Fordham said after she eventually let go.

"Thank you," the little boys said in unison.

"You're very welcome," Derek said, giving each of them a high five. "Dr. Smithson will be the on-call doctor for your husband overnight, and Dr. Grey and I will be back tomorrow to check on him. If you have any questions, feel free to tell the nurses to give us a call," Derek said.

"Okay, I will," she replied. "Thank you. Really, we couldn't be more grateful."

Meredith smiled. "It was our pleasure."

She and Derek politely excused themselves from the family, and Meredith took his hand, pulling him down the hall in the opposite direction of the elevators. Derek went along with whatever she was doing, despite his confusion.

"What are we doing?" he asked.

"Celebrating."

Derek smirked as he put the pieces together. Celebrating with Meredith at the hospital had a singular definition, and he was happy to oblige. "Hmm, why are we going to an on-call room when we have my office upstairs?"

"Because we're not going to an on-call room," Meredith replied, looking stealthily up and down the deserted hall before turning the knob that opened the linen closet door. Once they both entered, she quickly locked it from the inside.

"Seriously? We haven't had linen closet sex in years," Derek said, the end of his sentence coming out in a murmur when she pressed her lips against his.

"I know. That's why I want to, for old time's sake." Meredith kicked off her shoes and shimmied out of her scrub pants. "Want to give me sex hair?"

A grin spread over Derek's face as she pulled her shirt over her head. "God, yes," he groaned, the pressure in his groin intensifying as more and more of her clothes came off.

Meredith smiled in satisfaction. "That's what I thought."

...

Lilly sat snuggled in Derek's lap, happy after a long day of being pampered by Richard and Adele, who sent her home with more toys to add to her collection, and clothes to add to her wardrobe. She looked with interest at the pictures in the album that Derek was flipping through in front of them.

"This is Dada, Lilly, when I was your age," Derek told her, pointing to a page full of his infant pictures.

Lilly babbled up at him, drool running down her chin. Derek wiped it off with his hand, then wiped that hand on his pants. "You're the only baby whose spit I don't mind," he chuckled.

The bathroom door opened and Meredith walked out, her hair pulled up in a messy bun after her shower. "I'm pretty sure my A-S-S still has shelf marks on it," she said.

Derek smiled smugly. "I guess that means I did my job right."

"Well, you did give me sex hair, so yes, you did," Meredith said, dropping down onto the bed. "That was fun. We need to do that more often."

"Agreed."

"What are we doing in here?" she asked.

Derek smiled. "Showing Lilly pictures of her grandpa."

Meredith wrapped her arm around his shoulders and hugged him. "I'm sorry this day always sucks for you."

"Today it didn't," he said, turning toward her. "Today was actually a really great day. _You_ made it a great day."

"I swear I didn't plan it that way," she said.

"Still, because of you, we got to save Mr. Fordham's life today. Twice. Even though I didn't get to keep my dad, those two little boys got to keep theirs. That's worth more to me than any surgery," Derek said. He kissed the top of Lilly's head. "And you gave me Lilly. Whenever I'm sad, all I have to do is look at her, and I feel better."

"Me, too," Meredith said as her eyes were drawn to a picture of Derek's father holding Amy in his arm shortly after she was born. "Wow. That looks like you holding Lilly."

Derek grinned. "Shepherd DNA is a powerful thing."

"Clearly," Meredith said in amusement, gesturing to Derek and Lilly with their matching dark hair and blue eyes. "It's like playing 'which of these things is not like the other?' and the answer is me. I would care, except you're both really cute."

"You wanna see cute? Lilly is _this close_ to saying Dada. We've been practicing," Derek said, turning Lilly around to face him.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "She's seven months old, Derek."

"She can do it. Look at her. She's got her game face on," he upheld, bouncing Lilly on his lap. "I'm serious. Be on stand-by with your camera."

Meredith took her phone off her nightstand and turned on the video mode, mostly just to humor him. "Okay, we're recording."

"Okay. Come on, Lilly! Say Dada!" he shouted softly in encouragement. "Dada!"

Lilly blew bubbles and babbled back at him, then stuck her thumb in her mouth. Derek smirked as he gently nudged it back out. "We're trying to prove Mommy wrong. You can have your thumb back in a minute."

"I hope you do prove me wrong, because now I really want to see it," Meredith laughed. "Lilly, Dada!"

"Dadadadada!" Lilly repeated easily.

Meredith froze, nearly dropping her phone in shock. "Oh my God, you really said it!" she gasped.

"I told you she could do it!" Derek practically cheered, pressing kisses to Lilly's cheek.

Meredith finally remembered to press stop on the video, and quickly saved it so she could send it to everyone. "I can't believe she actually said it. You made me cry again, peanut," she said, wiping under her eyes.

"One week you get a tooth, and the next, you're talking. What's next, huh? Are you gonna start crawling tomorrow?" Derek asked.

"Come here, baby girl," Meredith said, taking Lilly from Derek to hug her. "I'm so proud of you."

"That just made this day a thousand times better," he said.

"She replaced a sad memory with a happy one," Meredith said in understanding as she leaned into him.

January 21st held a place in Derek's heart as the day he lost his father, but hearing Lilly call him Dada would forever make the day something to celebrate. Derek looked at his daughter, who finally succeeded in putting her thumb in her mouth after a job well done.

"Yeah," Derek smiled. "Yeah, she really did."


	140. Love is in the Air

**Disclaimer: I wish, but no. It's not mine.**

**I'm sorry! I never meant for a month to pass between updates. Please forgive me, and I hope you enjoy this update!  
**

It was Valentine's Day, one of the few days a year that Derek got a free pass to be cheesy, and he always took advantage of it: romance, flowers, chocolate, and sex, though now that they had Lilly, the last item would have to wait until she was tucked away, sleeping soundly in her crib.

Derek walked up the path to the front steps of their house, his arms full of the Valentine's Day gifts for Meredith and Lilly, ones he bought on his way home after a morning spent at the hospital doing neuro consults. He managed to open the front door, his eyes narrowing in amused curiosity when he heard music playing.

He followed it to its source and ended up in the kitchen, where Meredith was dancing with Lilly on her hip, the baby's laughter echoing over the song Meredith was singing to her. He set the presents down on the table and watched the mini concert going on in front of him.

"Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby! Let me know! Girl I'm gonna show you how to do it and we start real slow! You just put your lips together and you come real close! Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby! Here we go!" Meredith belted out like a pro, unfazed by Derek's presence. She turned down her iPod, docked on the radio.

"Hey," she greeted.

"Hey."

Derek put his hands on her cheeks and kissed her, getting in a few extra pecks in before pulling away. "Hi, Lillybug," he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Happy Valentine's Day."

"Happy Valentine's Day," Meredith echoed.

"Having fun in here?" he asked.

Meredith smiled. "We are, actually. Lilly and I were bored after breakfast, so I decided to paint my toes, then hers. Pretty right?" she said, holding up Lilly's bare, chubby foot with freshly painted, pink toes.

"It looks gorgeous," Derek complimented, tickling the bottom of Lilly's foot. "Wait, _you_ own a bottle of hot pink nail polish?"

"God, no. Lexie gave it to Lilly for Christmas. It's called Piggy Paint or something. It's made for babies, so it's all natural ingredients," Meredith said. "We were dancing around, so the air would dry it."

"I love it," he chuckled. "Not sure I can say the same for the song, though."

"What about it?"

Derek smirked, pouring himself a cup of coffee from the pot on the counter. "That song is about... blowjobs," he said, mouthing the last word because he couldn't bring himself to say it out loud in front of his daughter.

"Yes, but Lilly doesn't know that. She just likes the tune," Meredith said, leaning into him. Her lips trailed from his neck to his jaw before she nibbled on his earlobe. "But it is Valentine's Day, so maybe you and I can live out those lyrics later on."

Derek shuddered at the thought as he tried to regain composure and get the images of that out of his head. Although if Lilly weren't in the room, he wasn't sure he'd able to resist having his way with Meredith on the counter top.

"Is that a promise?" Derek asked.

"Have I ever gone back on a S-E-X promise to you?"

"No, you haven't. One of the many reasons I married you," he teased.

"Right back at you," she said, pointing to the kitchen table. "So, what's all that?"

"Gifts for my two favorite girls. I may have gone a little overboard, but I couldn't help it," he said.

Meredith smiled when she saw the two flower bouquets he'd bought. "You got us lilies?"

"Seemed appropriate," Derek said, mirroring her smile. "And I know you both love purple, so I went for those. There's also the required box of chocolates that I get you every year."

"With extra cherry ones?"

"Yes."

Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed him again. "I love you."

"Hmm, because of the chocolate?"

"Amongst other things, yes," Meredith replied, spotting two stuffed animals next to her box of chocolates. "Ooh, what did Daddy get for you, Lilly?"

Derek picked up the monkey toys off the table to show them both how they worked. "Daddy got you kissy monkeys. See? If you put their lips near each other, they kiss," he said, separating the toys before letting the magnets pull them back together.

Lilly let out a squeal of delight when Derek gave her the monkeys, and she wasted no time in putting one of their ears in her mouth to chew on.

"Those are adorable," Meredith said, handing Lilly over to Derek when he reached his arms out.

Derek hugged her tight and breathed in her soft, baby smell. "Dada missed you this morning," he said.

"Dadadada," Lilly echoed, saying her new favorite word every chance she got.

Derek grinned with pride. "You really are the smartest, cutest baby on the entire planet. You know that, right?"

"Not that we're biased or anything. But yeah, she is," Meredith agreed as she pulled the cellophane wrapper off the heart shaped box of chocolates. "So, where are you taking us today?"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

Meredith cocked her head at him. "Don't play innocent. You've always got something up your sleeve. Secret double datey-ness with Cristina and Owen like last year, ferryboat rides, an ambush baby shower disguised as a brunch date," she recalled.

"Fine, you got me. I made lunch reservations at that little café near Pike Place. I figured we could do the Valentine's thing early, so we could hang out with Lilly tonight," Derek said.

"I like that plan," Meredith said before she bit into a chocolate. She tasted the coconut center and scrunched her nose. "Should've checked the diagram in the lid first. Want it?"

"The coconut ones are the best," Derek said, popping the other half into his mouth.

"Eating chocolate at ten thirty in the morning... I'm so glad I got you to join the dark side," Meredith joked.

"I'm still trying to lose the sympathy pounds I gained during your pregnancy," Derek said as he patted his stomach with his hand.

"I'm the one that gained the weight, not you," she countered.

"Yeah, all six pounds and seven ounces of Lilly. Once she was out, boom. Back to being a supermodel," Derek said.

Meredith laughed. "You're already getting laid tonight. The flattery is just overkill."

"It's not flattery if it's the truth."

"Well played," she complimented. "How was work?"

"Good. Boring, but good. It's not as much fun without you," Derek said, catching one of the monkey toys before it could reach the ground. "Oh, I almost forgot! I saw Mark and he gave me a copy of Bridget's latest sonogram. Four months now."

"Really? I want to see it," Meredith said excitedly, taking Lilly so Derek could get the sonogram photo from his pocket. "Do they know the sex?"

Derek handed her the picture and shook his head. "They're still debating on whether or not to find out, but the baby's legs were crossed, so they couldn't tell, anyway. Mark is convinced it's a girl, though. He said if it were a boy, everyone would know it."

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Of course he would think that," she said, admiring the 3-D ultrasound picture. "Look at the little face!"

"Yeah. Boy or girl, they made a cute kid," Derek said.

"Remember last Valentine's Day? It was the day I felt Lilly's first real kick from the inside. I miss that," Meredith said, squeezing one of Lilly's feet, much bigger than it had been a year ago when she was still in-utero.

"Well, if all goes according to plan, this time next year, baby number two will be kicking you from the inside," he reminded her as he put the sonogram on the fridge, securing it with a magnet. "And tonight is the perfect opportunity to practice."

Lilly reached up to touch Meredith's lips just as Derek leaned in to kiss her, effectively blocking the kiss from happening. They both smiled against her hand, smushed between them.

"Hmm, apparently Lilly wants us to put a kibosh on the whole new baby thing," Derek said.

Meredith laughed. "I think she does."

...

"People who say romance goes out the window once kids come along clearly never met you," Meredith said, smiling at Derek and Lilly from across the table at the café where they were having lunch.

"What do you mean?" he asked as he spoon-fed Lilly some of her pears.

Meredith swallowed a bite of her salad, then broke off a piece of the pumpernickel bread from the basket at the center of the table. "You. When you're in Daddy mode, it kind of makes me swoon," she admitted.

"Swoon, huh?"

"Yeah. I mean, moonlight and flowers and candy are always welcomed, but you two... nothing tops that," Meredith said, lathering her bread with butter, calories be damned.

Derek wiped Lilly's chin with her bib, chuckling. "What about people trying to feel you up?" he said, recalling the rant she'd had on the porch of the old house years ago.

"As long as you're the one feeling me up, go for it," she said. She bit into the piece of buttered bread and moaned at the taste on her tongue. "Mmm, and big chunks of carbs in a basket? Thumbs up."

"This is the 'carbs in a basket' place I had in mind way back when I suggested it all those years ago. But you chose tequila on the porch instead," Derek said, feigning hurt.

"Yes, and because of that, you got dirty, hot car sex," Meredith added, not buying into his pity.

Derek smiled at the memory. "Good sneaking."

"Very good sneaking," she echoed, looking at Lilly, who was wearing the pink and red dress covered in hearts that Derek's mom sent her, along with the matching headband. "We've come a long way since then."

"Wouldn't trade it for anything." Derek pressed a kiss to the top of Lilly's head, then clinked his water glass against Meredith's.

"Me either."

"Oh, by the way, don't think I haven't gotten you anything. Your gift is forthcoming," Meredith said.

Derek raised his eyebrows at her slightly. "I'm all for the coming. Multiple times, actually."

"Really? In front of our sweet, innocent baby?" Meredith scolded him, taking Lilly so Derek could have a chance to eat.

"She's all about her monkeys right now. She couldn't care less about any... forthcoming gifts," Derek said.

"I'm serious. One gift is from Lilly; the other is from me. But yeah, mine is of the porny variety," Meredith admitted, giving Lilly a sip of her bottle after she finished off the last of her pears.

"I'd expect nothing less of a Valentine's Day present from you," Derek replied before taking a bite of his sandwich.

"Is that a compliment?"

"Yes."

Meredith smiled. "Good."

Just as Derek was reaching for his water glass, the woman at the table next to theirs let out a gasping cough, her brown eyes wide in panic. They both turned toward her, their lunch forgotten as they went into doctor mode in a split second.

"Amanda? Amanda, what's the matter?" asked the man sitting across from her.

"Miss, are you okay?" Derek asked, getting up from his chair.

The man reached for her dessert, frantically pulling it apart with his fingers. "She swallowed it! The ring! I had an engagement ring hidden in the cake!" he yelled.

Derek knelt down next to the woman, maintaining his always reassuring presence, while Meredith stayed close by, dialing 911. "Amanda, my name is Derek. I'm a doctor. I need you to stay calm, okay?" he said softly. "Do you think you swallowed it?"

Amanda nodded, pointing to her throat. Derek gently palpated Amanda's neck with his hand, and stopped when he felt the ring lodged in her trachea. "I feel it. It's actually stuck in your airway. I know it's hard, but try not to cough or take big breaths, or it'll drop farther down. Can you breathe?"

Amanda gave a small nod, one that Derek mirrored. "Good. That's great. Just take small, slow breaths, okay? Do you think you can do that for me?" he asked, to which Amanda nodded again.

Meredith propped Lilly on her hip and walked over to stand next to Derek. "Amanda, my name is Meredith. Derek and I work at the hospital nearby. I already called the paramedics, and they'll be here in a few minutes," she said, addressing the man who was with her. "Sir, what's your name?"

"Kevin," he answered, white as a ghost. "Is she going to be okay?"

"We're going to take good care of her," Meredith said. "How about Derek stays here and comes along with both of you in the ambulance, while I go on ahead to the hospital. Once you get there, we'll get that ring out right away."

"Yes, please, if you don't mind," Kevin said, running his fingers over the back of his girlfriend's hand.

Derek nodded in agreement. "Sure, not a problem," he said, turning to Meredith. "Are you okay with Lilly?"

"Yeah. Alex is working, so I'll have him watch her while I get everything prepped for a bronchoscopy," Meredith said as she buckled Lilly in her car seat. After gathering the rest of their belongings, she put her hand on Amanda's shoulder. "I know this is scary, but you're in good hands," she said. "I'll see you soon."

"Okay," Derek said, pulling his chair over next to Amanda in an attempt to keep her calm.

Meredith quickly made a beeline for the exit, ignoring all of the gawking stares from the employees and other restaurant patrons that watched the whole thing unfold in front of them. She spotted the restaurant manager waiting at the front door, holding it open for her, and she smiled.

"Thank you," she said. "My husband is going to wait for the ambulance, but he has his credit card for the bill. Sorry for the scene."

"No, no trouble at all. It's on the house. We're relieved you were here to help. Thank you," he returned.

She smiled politely at the man, then walked out the door and into the parking lot, clicking the unlock button on her key fob when she reached the car. "See, Lilly, this is why people should never, ever hide jewelry in food. It's not romantic. It's just stupid," she said, imparting her wisdom on her daughter while she fastened the car seat in the base.

Meredith rummaged in the diaper bag and pulled out Lilly's baby doll, the one thing that ensured getting from Point A to Point B without a fuss. "But I guess that's the upside of Valentine's Day, right? One person's romantic proposal is another's opportunity to do a bronchoscopy. Can you say bronchoscopy?" she asked, handing her the doll.

"A dada," Lilly replied, before her thumb made its way into her mouth, the doll clutched in her other arm.

Meredith laughed, kissing her forehead. "Close enough."

...

The ride to the hospital was quick, mostly due to the back roads Meredith took to save time, ones she knew like the back of her hand after years of living in Seattle. She pulled into the employee lot, and after unloading Lilly and their bags, she practically jogged to the front entrance, and took the elevator down to the tunnels, which was the fastest way to the ER.

Meredith carried Lilly on her hip as she walked, and the baby looked around at the older part of the hospital with interest. "This is where Mommy used to hang out with all of your aunts and uncles way back when. There's vending machines, wheelchairs, broken gurneys we all used to lounge around on. And oh, look! That's the gurney Daddy and I broke when we—never mind," she said before deciding to censor herself, sparing Lilly the NC-17 tale.

"Dada," Lilly babbled, her tiny voice echoing in the tunnels.

"Dada and I were wild back in the day. That's also how we both knew billing was in the basement," Meredith said. "But that's a story for another time... or maybe never."

Once Meredith finished navigating the tunnels, she walked into the back entrance of the fairly quiet ER. It only took a few moments to scan the room and find Alex, who was sitting at a chair behind the nurses' station.

"Hey," Meredith said, sitting Lilly on the counter top.

Alex looked up from the patient chart he was filling out. "Hey. Aren't you off today?" he asked.

"Yeah. Derek, Lilly and I were out to lunch, and the woman at the table next to ours accidentally swallowed her engagement ring that her boyfriend hid in her dessert. Derek is coming with them in the ambulance, so we need to do a bronchoscopy," Meredith said, spinning Lilly around on the counter to face him. "And Lilly was really hoping that her awesome Uncle Alex could spend some time with her for an hour."

Lilly reached for the eskimo doll that was a staple of the nurses' station for as long as they could all remember, and Alex pushed it toward her. Lilly happily grabbed hold of it, much to Meredith's mild horror. "Lilly, that thing is covered in germs," she winced.

"Oh, come on. She loves it," Alex said, scribbling his signature on the chart, then flipping it shut.

"Fine, just no chewing on him," Meredith compromised, her arms cradled around Lilly to keep her safe on the counter. "So, what do you say? One hour with the world's prettiest, little Valentine?"

Whatever resolve Alex had melted to mush when Lilly smiled at him, a line of drool running down her chin. "Fine. Sitting down here is lame anyway. I'll page a fourth year to come babysit the interns."

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief, taking Lilly's hands and clapping them together. "Thank you."

"You're not just messing with me, right? This isn't just some hoax so you and Derek can go bang one out in the on-call room," Alex asked.

"I wish. All of the banging is happening tonight," Meredith said, biting her lip to keep herself from rambling any further.

"Nice."

"So I promise, not a hoax. The ambulance is going to be rolling in any minute, and I need to get upstairs to make sure there's a procedure room available," Meredith said.

"Alright, what do I need to do?" Alex asked, standing up from his swivel chair.

Meredith slung Lilly's bag up onto the counter and managed to unzip it with one hand. "You're gonna need her baby doll. She has magic powers, and can ward off nearly all freak outs, so have her handy at all times. She may not want it, but I packed a bottle. Usually, she'll drink most of it," Meredith said, handing it to Alex, so she could show him the zipper compartment in the bag.

"Dude, is this breast milk?" Alex asked, holding it at arm's length.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "No, we let her drink piña coladas," she joked. "Yes, it's breast milk. Okay, there's diaper cream in this zipper part, diapers and wipes on the left side of the bag, bibs and spare clothes on the right. I doubt you'll need any of it, except for maybe a diaper, but just in case you do, it's all here."

"Got it."

"Are you sure you can handle this? Is Izzie around?" Meredith asked.

"If I can manage the peds. floor by myself, I can watch your kid for an hour," Alex said, handing Meredith the bottle back. "The fact that this came from your boobs is creeping me out a little bit, but I can handle it."

Meredith kissed the top of Lilly's head, scooting her toward Alex. "Thank you; I owe you for this," she told him. "Dada and I will come to get you a little later, baby girl."

"Dada," Lilly repeated as always.

"She talks now?" Alex asked in surprise as he picked Lilly up and held her on his hip.

"She just says Dada. But since Dada is Derek, she'll probably be a Chatty Kathy by the time she turns one," Meredith said proudly. "Love you, Lilly. I'll see you soon."

Alex waved her little hand and smiled with the hope that Lilly would mirror it rather than flip out as Meredith walked away. "See ya," he said. Once Meredith was out of ear shot, he bounced Lilly his arm. "If I find your parents doing it in the on-call room, they're toast, kid."

...

Derek stood in the scrub room washing his hands, watching as Meredith prepped Amanda for her bronchoscopy. It wasn't exactly a high-tech neuro surgery that he and Meredith were accustomed to, but they were going to do it anyway. Or Meredith would, while Derek watched. It was another procedure she could add to her résumé, and he was happy to let her do it.

After he finished scrubbing in, he walked into the procedure room on the other side of the glass. "Hey. How are we doing in here?"

"Great. She's numbed from the local anesthetic spray, so we're good to go. Do either of you have any questions?" Meredith asked the two of them.

Amanda shook her head, glancing over at her boyfriend. "No, we're ready," Kevin said.

"Okay. This shouldn't take more than a few minutes. This probe has a camera on the end of it, as well as a grasper, so once I spot the ring on this screen, I'll just grab it and pull it out. It'll feel strange, but you're numbed, so it shouldn't hurt. Just try not to cough or swallow. Small, shallow breaths like you've been doing, okay?" Meredith explained calmly.

Amanda nodded, holding onto Kevin's hand, while Derek pulled up a chair on the other side of the reclined exam table. "Dr. Grey's known how to do this since she was ten. You couldn't have asked for a better doctor," he said.

Meredith smiled, trying to conceal the slight smirk on her face. "Thank you, Dr. Shepherd," she said. "Okay, Amanda, I need you to open your mouth as wide as you can and relax your tongue."

Amanda did just that, and Meredith easily snaked the probe down the woman's airway. She kept her eyes focused on the video screen next to her, stopping the probe when she spotted the diamond ring about halfway down. "There it is," she announced.

"Pretty ring. Despite this whole ordeal, I'd say he's a keeper, Amanda," Derek said in good humor.

Meredith bit her lip in concentration, making sure she had a good grip on the ring before slowly removing it. After a few seconds of snaking the probe back up Amanda's airway, the ring was out, and Meredith dropped it into the emesis basin filled with saline solution to clean it. "All done," she said. "How are you feeling, Amanda?"

"Good," Amanda rasped, clearing her throat.

Derek raised up the exam table to a sitting position. "You did well. Can you take a few deep breaths for me?"

Amanda inhaled and exhaled deeply, and Derek nodded in approval. "Very good," he said, walking around to the other side of the table. He patted Kevin's back subtly. "Second time's a charm," he murmured.

Meredith dried off the ring with a paper towel and handed it to Kevin, expecting him to put it back in the box and map out a new game plan for a proposal. But when he got down on one knee for the second time that day, Meredith looked at Derek, eyes wide in shock.

Derek chuckled softly and slinked his arm around her waist, scooting backward a few steps in a respectful distance. "Seriously? Here?" Meredith whispered into his ear.

Derek pressed his lips to her temple and she leaned into him. "Sometimes, you just can't wait," he said.

Kevin smiled at Amanda, looking even more nervous than she had with a piece of jewelry lodged in her throat. "I know this isn't exactly what either of us thought would happen when I proposed to you, but you know, at least now we'll have a really good story to tell our kids one day," he said, holding up the ring. "So Amanda, if I vow to never hide anything in food ever again, will you marry me?"

Amanda wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her right hand. "Yes," she laughed, watching as Kevin slid the ring onto her finger. She put her hands on his cheeks and kissed him, unconcerned about the presence of two doctors standing a few feet away.

"That's a much better place for it," Derek said.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "You mean on her finger instead of almost in her lungs? Yeah, I'd say so."

Amanda glanced over at the two of them, an appreciative smile on her face. "Thank you. Thank you both so much," she said.

"You're welcome," Meredith replied, barely able to say anything more before Amanda wrapped her arms around her. "Congratulations," she said, hugging the woman back. "We're just glad we were there to help."

"Believe me, whenever we tell this story, you two will be the stars. We'll be singing your praises forever for this one," Kevin said as he shook Derek's hand.

"So sorry for interrupting your lunch with you and your daughter," Amanda apologized.

"Don't worry about it," Meredith said, waving it off. "She's hanging out with a friend of ours who volunteered to be her Valentine for a little while. She's in good hands."

...

Meanwhile, Alex was wishing he had just one more hand. He sat with Lilly in the back of an OR gallery, studying for the upcoming boards. Lilly, though, had no interest in his studying, much preferring to practice her crawling skills on the plethora of books scattered around them.

"Whoa, Lilly. I need to return you in one piece, so how about we don't try to scale book mountain," Alex said, picking her up and setting her back on her bottom.

Lilly heaved a heavy sigh of annoyance at being sidetracked from her mission, and Alex couldn't help but laugh. "It's rough being a baby, I know," he said. He scooped her into his lap and pulled his phone from his pocket. "Alright, check this out. See this picture? That's a heart that Dr. Altman and I are growing from scratch in the lab for this preemie. Well, technically we're growing it from stem cells. Pretty cool, huh?"

Lilly looked at the picture, her blue eyes wide in fascination. "Yeah, you're definitely the offspring of two surgeons," he laughed.

"What're you doing up here?"

Alex turned around and saw Bailey standing behind him, box of chocolates in one hand, charts in the other. "Hey. Meredith and Shepherd were out to eat when some chick swallowed her engagement ring. Mer asked me to watch Lilly while they took it out," he said.

"You sure she and Derek aren't off... celebrating the holiday in the on-call room?" Bailey asked.

"Better not be," Alex said, swiping a chocolate from the box Bailey set next to his books. He scrunched his nose when he smelled something unpleasant, then reluctantly peeked into the back of Lilly's diaper, dropping his head in defeat. "Aww, come on."

"You're gonna be a peds. surgeon, Karev. Surely, you can handle a dirty diaper," she said, rolling her eyes at him. Alex picked Lilly up off his lap and held her out to Bailey, who crossed her arms over her chest. "Uh uh. You volunteered yourself. Poop comes with the territory."

"Yeah, but you have a kid," Alex said.

"Tuck is five. I haven't changed a diaper in years," Bailey upheld, taking Lilly from him. "I'll hold her while you get out what you need, then I'll walk you through it."

Alex groaned as he rummaged through Lilly's bag, pulling out what he needed for a diaper change. Once he was finished rolling out her changing mat, he reached for Lilly. "Okay, let's get this over with," he said. After shimmying off her leggings and pulling up her dress, Alex braced himself, peeling back the tabs on Lilly's diaper.

"Good, now just lift up her legs and clean her with the wipes front to back. And don't put her legs back down until you move the old diaper out of the way," Bailey instructed, deciding to help him by taking out a diaper disposal baggie and opening it for him. "Toss everything in here."

"This is gross," Alex said, his nose buried in his shoulder.

"If she were a boy, she could be peeing on you. Consider yourself lucky," Bailey pointed out, smiling at Lilly. "Would you look at that girl's hair. Just like her dad's."

"Dada," Lilly replied in her tiny voice.

Bailey's eyes went wide. "She talks now?"

"Same thing I said. Mer said that's all she says so far," Alex relayed, shaking out Lilly's new diaper and sliding it under her bottom.

"Hmm, I bet Shepherd loves gloating about that one," Bailey mused as she surveyed his work. "I had my doubts, but I'm impressed, Karev."

"Impressed enough to let me scrub in on your diverticulectomy later today?" Alex asked.

Bailey took Lilly from Alex after he finished re-dressing her, and bounced the baby on her hip. "I thought you were scrubbing in with Robbins on the girl in 3218?"

"I was supposed to, but then her stupid friends snuck her some chocolate even though she was NPO, so we had to push it to tomorrow," Alex said.

"What do you say? Should we let him scrub in?" Bailey asked Lilly, who was amusing herself by shaking one of Alex's highlighters in her hand.

"I fed you a bottle full of your mom's breast milk, burped you, and changed your freaking diaper. You owe me, Lilly," Alex said, giving Lilly a thumbs up as motivation for her to mirror him.

Lilly gave him a thumbs up back before sticking it in her mouth, and Alex clapped his hands in victory. "Ha! I knew you were cool, kid."

"Fine, as long as you prep the guy, you can scrub in," Bailey agreed.

After Alex finished packing up Lilly's diaper supplies, he held out his arms to take Lilly back, but Bailey turned away. She scowled when Alex plastered an accusatory look on his face. "Don't look at me like that. I'm not soft. I just haven't held a baby in a while, and this one happens to be exceptionally adorable, so I'm getting my fix," Bailey said in defense of herself.

"Admit it. You're smitten," Alex said.

"I am not—"

"Who's smitten?" Derek cut in, walking into the OR gallery with Meredith close behind.

"Bailey over your kid," Alex said as he twisted a rubber band around his stack of study cards.

Meredith smiled when she saw Lilly in the arms of her former resident. "Yeah, that happens to everyone. She's too cute for her own good. We're in trouble when her teenage years roll around."

"How's your girl with the ring in her throat?" Bailey asked.

"She's good. No more foreign objects lodged in her airway, and she's newly engaged. All in all, I'd say her Valentine's Day went well," Derek replied.

"Hmm, just checking," Bailey said.

Meredith kissed Lilly's cheek when she turned toward her. "What do you mean?"

"I was half convinced you made the whole thing up to go off and have a no-pants party somewhere," Bailey confessed as she fixed one of the buckles on Lilly's shoes.

"No, but if you're willing to watch Lilly for twenty minutes, we'd love to," Derek joked.

"Save it for the bedroom, Shepherd. Your _own_ bedroom," Bailey said, rolling her eyes.

Derek grinned. "Oh, well. Gave it a shot."

...

Lilly lay snoozing on Meredith's chest after nursing, sound asleep even before her normal bedtime. Meredith kissed the top of her dark hair, still damp after her bath. "Uncle Alex must be very entertaining," she said.

"Must be. She's out cold," Derek chuckled. "Does that mean I can't have my gift from her? I've been waiting all day."

"I think she'd forgive me if I gave it to you on her behalf," Meredith said, taking the wrapped present off her nightstand and dropping it in his lap.

Derek neatly unwrapped the gift, smiling wide when he saw what was inside. "This is adorable," he said, admiring the pink clay heart with Lilly's tiny hand prints impressed in the center, a picture of Lilly and Derek in between. "You two made this?"

"We did. And Lilly cooperated, so we got the hand prints on the first try, too. It's just something little," Meredith said.

"I love it. Any Lilly related gift is an awesome gift," Derek said, leaning over to press a kiss to Lilly's cheek. "Thank you, Lillybug," he said softly.

"Is she your new favorite Valentine?" Meredith asked playfully.

"Can't I have two favorites?" Derek asked as he made room for Lilly's gift on his nightstand. "Because really, I couldn't choose between the two of you."

"Me either."

"Although, if future fictitious baby number two is another girl, it'll be a tie between the three of you," Derek said. He put his hands on Meredith's cheeks and kissed her. "Speaking of baby making, you and I haven't made good on our practicing yet."

"I didn't give you my gift yet either," Meredith said.

"Hmm, wanna give me a hint?" Derek asked.

Meredith covered Lilly's ears with her hands. "It may or may not be something you can lick off of me," she divulged. "Oh, plus, I promised you we could bring those lyrics to life, so there's also that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she echoed, kissing Lilly again. "So, how about you take Lilly and get her settled in her crib, and when you get back, we can celebrate Valentine's Day Meredith-style."

"Meredith-style, huh?" Derek asked as he scooped Lilly off Meredith's chest, careful not to wake her. In his experience, Meredith-style celebrating involved all of his favorite things, and after building the anticipation all day, he couldn't wait to cash in on that promise.

"You know, gurney-breaking, sneaking off to the abandoned billing office in the hospital basement kind of celebrating..." Meredith hinted coyly.

Derek glanced back at her on his way into the hall with Lilly, and he smirked. "You better be naked when I get back," he said.

Meredith laughed, pulling her shirt over her head. "Way ahead of you."


	141. Grateful for All Life Gave

**Disclaimer: Still not mine.**

**Happy (almost) 2013! Enjoy!  
**

Meredith smiled against Derek's lips, doing her best to stifle her moans for Lilly's sake, though it was growing increasingly difficult. She pulled away from the kiss, and they both looked down at their daughter, sleeping soundly between the two of them.

"There's a baby in the bed," Derek whispered.

Meredith laughed softly. "I know there's a baby in the bed."

"There's no baby in the bathroom," he hinted, raising his eyebrows slightly.

"There _is_ no baby in the bathroom," Meredith said excitedly.

As quietly as they could, Meredith shimmied to the left while Derek moved to the right, doing their best not to jostle Lilly and risk waking her up. Even though she was in the safe sleeper between them, they put pillows on the edges of the bed to act as a cushion in the off chance she woke up and decided to do some rolling.

Derek pet Charlie, who was snoozing away at the foot of their bed. "Keep an eye on your sister. We'll be back, buddy," he said.

Meredith took his hand and pulled him into the bathroom attached to their bedroom. Once inside, she closed the door just enough so that they could hear Lilly if she woke up. When she turned around, she put one hand on Derek's cheek and kissed him, using the other to snake her hand into his pajama pants and boxers.

Derek inhaled, already hardening at her touch. "Mmm, Mer," he groaned.

"Good?" Meredith asked, laughing when he decided to retaliate. He pulled off her pants and panties in one swift move, then lifted her onto the bathroom counter. When his hands went between her legs, she dropped her head onto his shoulder and moaned. "Yeah, keep doing—" she stopped herself when she saw Lilly's robe out the corner of her eye, hanging on its usual hook between theirs. "Wait, stop."

"What?"

"I can't do it in front of Lilly's ducky robe," Meredith said.

"Yes, you can. Do it in front of the ducky robe," he chuckled, moving his lips to her neck.

"Derek, seriously, it's staring at me. That little yellow tail and beak hood..."

Derek took the robe and put it on the shelf with the bath towels, so it wouldn't be distracting. "There. Out of sight, out of mind."

"Thank you," Meredith said, wrapping her legs around his waist.

"Wow. Going for it, huh?" Derek asked as his fingers continued to tease her.

"Well, if you keep doing that, yeah," Meredith replied. She gently took him in her hand and let him do the rest, smiling at the look on his face as he pushed inside her. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Meredith wiggled her hips as she adjusted, then clenched around him, something that always drove him crazy. She laughed when he physically reeled in response.

"Not nice," he said as he began thrusting in and out.

Meredith tipped her head back, her fingers gripping the edge of the counter. "Very nice," she gasped. "Derek, harder."

Derek started moving harder and picked up the pace, smiling smugly when Meredith moaned out loud. "Shh," he chuckled.

"Fine," Meredith said. She kissed him again, keeping her lips on his to muffle noises she couldn't help but make. "How's that? Better?"

"Mhm," he murmured. "Much."

They continued moving, always quick to find their rhythm and draw out the pleasure as long as they could. Just as they were nearing the edge, ready to let go and give into their imminent peaks, Lilly started fussing in their bedroom. Her little cries of upset traveled into the bathroom, and they froze in place.

"Damn it," Derek whispered, the ache in his groin increasing as he started to step back.

Meredith quickly put her hands on his ass to stop him. "Derek, I need an orgasm. Keep going," she panted.

All it took was Derek thrusting back in, and she was a goner. Her nerve endings ignited like flames and she began clenching around him, splaying her hands over Derek's back to keep herself steady. The feel of her orgasm running through her triggered his own release, and he buried his nose in her neck as he rode it out.

"God, Meredith," Derek sighed as they came down from their highs, sated and happy.

"Back at you," Meredith said.

Derek tilted her chin up to kiss her, then withdrew from her. He reached for his discarded boxers and slipped them on. "I'll check on Lilly," he said.

"Thanks. My legs are like Jell-O right now, so I probably won't be able to walk for a few minutes," she said, brushing her bangs off her forehead. "Plus, you gave me sex hair."

"Then I guess I did my job right," he grinned.

He walked out of the bathroom and toward their bed where Lilly lay fussing, trying to free her thumb from its prison beneath her pajama sleeve. Derek leaned over and scooped her up. "Hey, Princess. Lost your thumb?" he asked, rolling her sleeve up slightly. Lilly quickly began sucking, smiling at him with her thumb in her mouth.

"Crisis averted?" Meredith called out from the bathroom.

"All clear," Derek laughed. "Just an unrolled pajama sleeve."

Meredith shrugged her robe on, tied it, then went into the bedroom. "Well, that makes me glad we didn't stop, then."

"Legs working again?"

"A little wobbly, but I can walk it off," Meredith said, reaching for Lilly. "Morning, peanut. You look refreshed."

Derek smirked. "So do you."

"Porny."

"Still true."

Meredith smelled something familiar, and held Lilly's bottom at Derek's nose level. "Charlie or Lilly?" she asked.

"Lilly. Definitely," Derek confirmed. "Thanks for making me inspect that, by the way. Baby poop is always a nice segue from sex."

"Tell you what, since a quickie just leaves me wanting more, I vote for round two tonight. In our bed. Long and slow," Meredith said into his ear as she walked toward the hall to change Lilly in her room.

"Oh, I can take it incredibly slow," Derek reminded her.

Meredith glanced back at him and smiled, biting her lip as she tracked him from head to toe. "I remember."

...

The double doors of the hospital opened with their usual wooshing hum, blasting them with a burst of warmth, a welcomed contrast to the cold air outside. Lilly pouted her lips as she scanned the lobby, and the look on her face made Derek laugh when he noticed.

"It's like she owns the place," he said amusedly.

Meredith smiled, pulling off Lilly's knit hat and kissing the dark curls underneath. "She's been here longer than the newest batch of interns, plus the nine months she spent inside me. I'd say she's earned a little seniority."

"Future neuro god," Derek grinned, pressing the button for the elevator. He spotted Mark walking toward them and he held the door open. "Hey, good timing."

"Thanks," Mark said as he stepped on after them. "Hey, Mini Mer is here!" he all but cheered.

Meredith laughed. "Really, Mini Mer? Even with the dark, curly hair and the Giants shirt Derek put her in this morning?"

"I was going to call her Mini Derek, but that sounds like a euphemism for his penis, so I opted for Mer instead," Mark explained, reaching for Lilly and kissing her cheek.

"Believe me, there's nothing mini about it," Meredith said in Derek's defense.

Derek's face heated and he ran a hand through his hair. "Oh, God."

"What? It's the truth," Meredith upheld.

"Okay, on a new, less creepy topic: you really approved of your daughter wearing Giants pride?" Mark asked in disbelief.

"Derek and I had sex on the bathroom counter this morning, so I was in such a good mood that I didn't care what he dressed her in," Meredith shrugged. "Besides, she looks cute in everything."

"No matching Giants headband?" Mark asked.

Meredith narrowed her eyes. "Don't push it," she said, the four of them getting off the elevator when it reached the fourth floor.

"Do you two have a surgery scheduled today?" Mark asked.

"So far, no. I have neuro consults until three, and Mer's on call for the pit, so she's just gonna hang out and study for the boards with Lilly during the downtime. We're hoping to sneak out early," Derek said.

"Shame. Bridget's off 'cause it's President's Day, and I was hoping to give her a distraction to keep her from redecorating our house," Mark joked.

"Driving you crazy?" Meredith guessed.

"She's not due until mid July and the nesting's already started. There's paint swatches and stroller catalogs everywhere. She's already rearranged my closet twice, and now, I don't know where anything is," Mark said, laughing when Lilly stuck her fingers in his mouth.

"Sounds familiar," Derek said, his eyes trailing toward Meredith, whose own nesting stage had both baffled and intrigued him.

Meredith nudged him with her elbow. "Baby hormones are not to be messed with. Nesting comes with the territory," she said. "But I promise, if anything comes up, she'll be the first one we call."

"And we'll pay her in IKEA gift cards," Derek teased as Mark handed Lilly back to him.

"Better not. She drags me to IKEA every Saturday. Last weekend, I was assembling a Hensvik for three hours. I didn't even know what it was until I finished putting it together. I'm telling you, there's more Swedish furniture in my house than there is in Sweden," Mark said.

"Yes, and she has to push a baby out of her hoohoo. Buck up," Meredith said playfully.

"What is a Hensvik, by the way?" Derek asked, bouncing Lilly in his arm.

"A baby wardrobe closet," Mark answered.

Meredith patted Mark's arm. "It makes me oddly proud that you know that."

...

Two hours had passed, and so far, the fourth year residents had managed to hold down the fort in the ER, giving Meredith much needed study time. Between Lilly and work, it was like having two, full time jobs, and most times when she studied with Derek, it led to clothes coming off and sex on the couch. So any time she was able to parcel out, she used it wisely.

As Meredith poured over her textbook on advanced peripheral nerve surgery, she peeked over at Lilly, who was next her on the pull-out couch. Lilly lay napping with her hand on her chest, one ankle crossed over the other, the same way Derek slept. Meredith smiled and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

Her pager beeped from inside her pocket and she quickly pulled it out, silencing it so it wouldn't wake Lilly up. When she saw the message that the fourth year sent her, she sighed. "Possible brain bleed. Need neuro consult. Curtain three," she read.

Meredith bit her lip, mapping out her game plan. She closed her books and wedged her feet back in her shoes, then reached for the baby sling she always kept in the diaper bag. After putting her arm through it, she picked up Lilly as gently as she could and slipped her inside. Lilly's eyelids fluttered open for only a second, but instead of protesting, she just turned toward Meredith, nuzzling her nose into her mom's chest.

"That's it; go back to sleep. We're just going for a little walk," Meredith cooed softly, managing to shrug on her white coat in an effort to stay inconspicuous and shield Lilly as best she could.

Despite glances from curious onlookers, Meredith made it down to the pit a few minutes later without comment from anyone. She was heading for curtain three when she heard Bailey's voice coming from the nurses' station.

"Did you really think no one would notice the baby in the sling you've got hanging off your chest?" Bailey asked, depositing a chart in the bin.

Meredith nodded as though it were no big deal. "That was the plan, yes," she said.

"Grey."

"What? The guy in curtain three might have a brain bleed, and I'm the on-call neuro resident," Meredith explained. "She's sleeping. It's fine."

Before Bailey had the chance to spout off all the reasons it wasn't fine, Meredith disappeared behind the curtain. An older man sat on the exam table, and a younger, pregnant woman stood beside him, both of them looking over at Meredith when she entered.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Grey," she greeted, shaking each of their hands. "You must be Mr. Gillespie."

"Why are we here, Kerry?" the elderly man asked.

"You fell, Dad, remember? We're at the hospital. Dr. Grey is here to help you, so just let her check you out, okay?" said Kerry, the man's daughter. She looked at Meredith, a tired expression on her face. "Sorry, he has dementia, and he gets confused in new surroundings," she said. "I'm Kerry, by the way. Nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Meredith said, wheeling over the stool. "You can sit if you'd like."

Kerry smiled slightly when she saw Lilly's feet, clad in her crocheted boots from Izzie, peeking out of the sling. "Seems like we're both carrying babies, only yours is on the outside. You should sit," she offered.

"No, please, I insist," Meredith said as she walked over to the sink to wash her hands. "How far along are you?"

"Thirty-eight weeks. I'm technically supposed to be on bed rest, but when Roseridge called and told me my dad fell and hit his head, I rushed right over and followed the ambulance," Kerry said.

Meredith froze at the mention of Roseridge, not having thought of the place in years since her mother passed. She tossed her paper towel in the trashcan and turned around, smiling at the woman. The two had something in common, something no one ever wanted to face, and she couldn't help but feel empathy for her.

"Well, we'll take good care of him," Meredith said. "Mr. Gillespie, would you mind if I examined your head, then looked in your eyes with my light?"

"No, that's fine," Mr. Gillespie agreed, turning toward his daughter. "Kerry, where's Gail? Is she here?"

Kerry shook her head. "No, Mom's still at Roseridge. I'm going to call her when Dr. Grey is finished," she said.

"Does your mom... I mean, is she..." Meredith asked, trying not to pry.

"They both have dementia. Actually, the doctors just upgraded my mom's diagnosis to Alzheimer's. They both lived with my husband and me up until five years ago, but then I got pregnant with my first, and it was too much. We knew we wouldn't be able to devote our time to a baby, and take care of my parents, so we looked into Roseridge. That place is a godsend. I don't know what we'd do without them. There are days when I feel so guilty, but I'm doing the best I can," Kerry said, dropping down onto the stool, one hand draped over her belly.

Meredith swallowed thickly, willing herself not to reach out and hug the woman. Watching one parent deteriorate and being powerless to stop it was hard enough; she couldn't imagine watching it happen to both. "That's all anyone can do," she said comfortingly, palpating Mr. Gillespie's skull with her fingertips.

"That's what my husband says. It's just hard, especially since half the time, they don't even recognize each other. Having to introduce your parents to one another day in and day out... I'll never get used to that. Married forty-four years, three kids, and it's like they're complete strangers," Kerry said.

Meredith looked down at Lilly, peacefully sleeping in her sling. Before she let herself break down in the middle of a consult, she cleared her throat, regaining composure. "I can't imagine," she said.

"Today was actually a good day. They knew each other today. They ate breakfast together, and were on their way to the reading room when he fell," Kerry said.

"Well, hopefully, we can give you the all clear, so you can go spend the rest of the day with your wife, Mr. Gillespie," Meredith said, shining her penlight into his eyes to check his pupils. She noticed one was slightly larger than the other, and marked it down in his work-up chart, keeping her face calm. "I'm going to send you up for a CT scan, okay?"

"Did you see something?" Kerry asked.

"His left pupil is slightly larger than his right, which could be caused by a handful of things, but I just want to play it safe," Meredith said. "Is that okay with you, Mr. Gillespie?"

"What's going on, dear?" Mr. Gillespie asked.

Kerry smiled at him in reassurance. "They're going to take a few pictures of your brain, Dad; that's all."

"Someone tell Gail. She'll worry if I'm not here when she gets back," the older main said.

"I'll tell her," Kerry promised, appeasing him.

"Megan, one of the fourth year residents, is going to take you upstairs, and I'll meet you after. How's that sound?" Meredith asked.

Mr. Gillespie nodded, mirroring his daughter. "Okay."

"Okay," Meredith echoed.

She left the ER cubicle and walked toward the nurses' station to have Megan paged. Just as she reached for the phone, she felt a tap on her back and she turned around, Kerry standing in front of her. "Everything okay, Kerry?" she asked.

"My dad... will he need surgery?"

"We really won't know anything until we get the CT results. But if he does, then you came to the right place, because we have an excellent team of surgeons," Meredith said, running her hand over Lilly's back in an effort to keep her sleeping. The ER was chaotic enough, and a Lilly meltdown would likely send the whole place over the edge if she got woken up.

"Okay. Okay," Kerry exhaled.

"I don't want you to panic. It's really just a precaution," Meredith said, noticing how she rubbed a hand over her burgeoning belly. "Maybe you could call your husband? I don't want you to overexert yourself."

"He's on a field trip with Paige—she's our five year old. They went to the museum for some President's Day thing, and I don't want to scare them. They'll be home around three. I'll call them then," Kerry said.

"Okay. Well, once your dad has the CT, we'll have some answers for you. So let's not worry until we have to," Meredith said comfortingly.

"Okay. Thank you," Kerry said, turning around to join her father again.

Meredith patted Lilly's bottom as she dialed Megan's pager. "So much for lying low today, huh, peanut?"

...

Lilly smacked her hand against the keyboard, keeping herself entertained while Meredith reviewed the CT scans on the computer monitor. She'd been a ball of energy since waking up from her nap, which wasn't exactly helping her mom focus.

"Lilly, no no," Meredith said, gently taking Lilly's hand away from the tempting keys that begged to be played with. "Your Daddy better get his hiney in here soon, because I'm pretty sure this guy needs surgery."

"Hey," Derek greeted as he walked into the viewing room. He dropped down in the swivel chair next to Meredith's, scooting toward the two of them. "Hey, Dr. Lillybug. Are you helping Mommy do consults?"

Meredith laughed. "She's actually on a mission to break the keyboard with her hand, but yeah, she went with me to the ER to do a consult."

"These the scans?" Derek asked.

"Yeah. Frank Gillespie, seventy-one year old male with dementia. He and his wife are both residents at Roseridge. He fell this morning and hit his head. When I was doing his neuro check, I noticed he had unilateral pupil dilation. Looks like he's got an epidural hemorrhage in his temporal lobe," Meredith said.

"Yeah, small one," Derek said, pointing to the dark spot on the computer screen. "I want you to do it."

"Do what? Fix the bleeder?"

"Yeah. It'll be good to have it on your résumé for your boards. I'll supervise. Stand behind you and whisper instructions in your ear," Derek teased.

"That usually just makes me all hot and bothered, which isn't how you want to feel standing over an open brain," Meredith replied as she bounced Lilly on her knee. "But thanks; I appreciate the sentiment."

"Well, I can't do that with all the kids," he grinned. "Should we take Bridget up on the offer, then?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah, I'll give her a call. We owe that girl a mountain of favors."

"Lilly will need a practice sibling to prepare for her future brother or sister. We'll babysit theirs any time they want," Derek said, taking Lilly from Meredith so she could go out into the hall to make the phone call. "How's the sound, Princess? Want to spend the day with Aunt Bridget while Mommy and Daddy save this nice man's life?"

Lilly planted a slobbery kiss on Derek's nose and smiled at him. "Dada," she cooed.

"I hope that's always your response to everything, even when you're sixteen and I tell you to clean your room," Derek said.

Lilly put her chubby hand over his mouth and scrunched her nose, as though she understood what he had said, and Derek laughed, pressing a kiss to her palm. "Yeah, that's more like it."

...

As much as Meredith loved the thrill that accompanied a craniotomy, it was hard to concentrate when she could feel Derek's body heat radiating behind her. And after the quickie this morning, coupled with the image of his naked body, fixing a brain bleed wasn't nearly as much fun as imagining all the things she felt like doing to him.

"Suction, please?" Meredith requested, taking it from Derek when he handed the instrument to her. She delicately suctioned the area of the brain bleed, making sure not to damage the areas of surrounding tissue. When she thought she spotted a clot just under the rim of the craniotomy, she leaned in closer. "I think I see a hematoma."

She stepped aside, so Derek could get a better view, and he nodded in confirmation. "Good catch, Dr. Grey. Possible causes?" he asked.

"Most likely sustained after his fall earlier today. His body's way of preventing further bleeding. I'll need more delicate suction to remove it, but it shouldn't cause any lasting effects," Meredith said.

"Excellent," Derek said, handing the suction tool to the scrub nurse, so she could change the attachment.

When she was finished, the nurse passed it over to her, and Meredith carefully suctioned out the clot, just as Derek had taught her many years ago. Confident that there was no more residual bleeding or clotting, she did a final inspection of her work like she always did, then smiled sadly under her mask. Though she was happy to have reversed Mr. Gillespie's brain bleed, it still didn't change the fact that when he woke up, he's still have dementia, still wouldn't know his own family, and that Kerry would still bear the burden of having not one sick parent, but two.

"Okay, I'm finished. Dr. Breslin, would you mind closing?" Meredith asked her fellow resident.

"Sure," Breslin said, walking toward the head of the OR table.

"Make sure to tell PACU to monitor his ICP closely, and to page me if his vitals go south," Meredith said.

"Will do," the circulating nurse promised as she marked it down in Mr. Gillespie's chart.

"Thank you."

After removing their head lights and loupes, Meredith followed Derek out of the OR, eager to scrub out, so she could tell Kerry the surgery had been a success. After the frazzling day the woman had had, she deserved a little good news.

Derek handed her a bar of soap once their gowns and gloves were pulled off, his smile fading when he noticed the less than joyful look on her face. "Hey. You okay? You seem..."

"Yeah. You know, just tired," she shrugged. "I'm okay."

Rather than push the issue, Derek just nodded in resignation. He knew she would be more receptive to talking later, when they were allotted more privacy than a scrub room could offer.

"Okay."

"Kerry is probably scared to death. Did you want to come with me to update her? The more reassurance, the better," Meredith said, grabbing a wad of paper towels and handing half to him.

"Yeah," Derek agreed. He tossed his paper towels in the trash after he finished drying off his hands, then held the door open for Meredith. "You did great work in there. You should be proud."

Meredith wove her fingers through his and squeezed. "Thank you."

They made the short walk to Mr. Gillespie's room where Kerry opted to wait, so she could relax, away from the bustle of the waiting area. Meredith knocked twice on the door before entering, frowning when she saw that it was empty.

"Kerry, are you in here?" Meredith asked.

"In here!" Kerry called out from the bathroom.

Meredith could hear the panic in her voice, and she quickly walked over to the bathroom. "Kerry? Kerry, it's Meredith. Do you mind if I come in?"

"Please, hurry!" Kerry said, her voice dissolving into a wail of pain.

Meredith turned the knob and went inside, Derek staying close behind outside the door in case they needed help. She saw the woman holding onto the edge of the sink, knuckles white from gripping so tightly. When Meredith's eyes trailed to the puddle at Kerry's feet, she put the pieces together.

"Okay, Kerry, your water broke. I'm going to help you walk over to the bed, okay?" Meredith said calmly, putting her arm around Kerry's waist.

Derek heard the exchange from the other side of the door, and was already making himself useful, grabbing a fresh gown from the closet. "Hey, Kerry. I'm Dr. Shepherd. Do you mind if I help Dr. Grey get you situated until OB comes down? I'm gonna go page them."

"No, that's fine. How's... how's my Dad? Is he okay?" Kerry asked, dropping her head onto Meredith's shoulder while she rode out her contraction.

"He's doing great. Surgery was a success. Right now, let's just focus on you," Derek said. He handed Meredith the gown, then pulled the curtain, standing on the other side to give the woman some privacy while he dialed the extension for OB.

"I feel like I need to push," Kerry said.

"Don't push, don't push. I know it's hard not to, but just try to fight it," Meredith said as she helped Kerry remove the bottom half of her clothes. When she saw the top of the baby's head, her eyes went wide, but she did her best to remain composed. "Actually, you might get to push after all. Baby's right there," she said. "Derek, she's crowning!"

Derek drew back the curtain, going into doctor mode within a split second and helping Meredith position Kerry on the bed. "Ready to have a baby, Kerry?" he asked, smiling at the woman in an attempt to ease some of the panic.

Another contraction welled up, and Kerry grabbed for Derek's hand. "I need to... can I?"

"Go for it," Meredith nodded as she put on a pair of gloves from the box on the wall. She hit the call bell on Kerry's bed rail with her elbow, hoping someone on the other end would answer.

"Hello?"

"Oh, thank God," Meredith murmured. "Yes, we need a delivery kit, warmer, and the OB that comes with it in room 4412 STAT. A patient's daughter is crowning."

"Right away," the nurse said.

Derek counted to ten softly, the same way he'd done for Meredith when she was giving birth to Lilly, and the memory made Meredith smile, even in the midst of an impromptu delivery. By the time Kerry was finished pushing for the second time, a nurse entered the room, wheeling a metal tray table in front of her, chock full of the sterile supplies Meredith needed.

"You're doing great, Kerry. Push again when you feel a contraction. Should be any second," Meredith said as the nurse tied a gown on her.

Kerry's body pushed on instinct before she had the chance to respond, and Meredith smiled when the baby's head was delivered. "Head's out. Lots of blonde hair. Once you get past the shoulders, you'll be finished, okay?"

Derek could feel the blood pulsing in his hand from Kerry's death grip, but he didn't pay any notice. His mind was elsewhere, watching as Meredith took control of the situation, completely in awe of her.

With a final push, the baby emerged, letting out a loud cry as soon as Meredith suctioned out his airway. "He's beautiful, Kerry," she said, holding him in her arm as she dried him off.

Kerry wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, an overjoyed, relieved smile on her face. "He? It's a boy?"

"Definitely a boy," Meredith said, taking the scissors from the nurse to cut the umbilical cord. After wiping him off, she put her swaddling skills to work, wrapping and tucking the same way she did for Lilly, then handed him to Kerry. "Congratulations. You did great."

"Hi, sweetheart," Kerry whispered to the baby, rubbing her finger over his soft cheek. "You look just like Paige. She's your big sister. I can't wait for you to meet her and your Daddy."

"Would you like me to call them?" Meredith offered.

"I did about an hour ago. They should be here soon," Kerry said, tearing her eyes away from her son. "Thank you. If you hadn't gotten here, I probably would have had him on the bathroom floor."

"Well, we're glad we could be here. He's a handsome, little guy," Derek complimented.

"Does he have a name?" Meredith asked.

"Francis John. My husband, Bill, and I agreed that if we had a boy, we'd name him after my Dad," Kerry said.

"Good name. I'm sure he'll wear it proud," Derek replied. "Usually the best part about waking up after surgery is the Jell-O. Now your Dad gets to meet his namesake grandson. I'd say that's a great end to an... eventful day, huh?"

"Yeah," Kerry laughed softly. "It really is."

The OB resident knocked on the door, a transporting gurney arriving moments later, and Meredith waved them into the room. "Okay, Kerry, an OB doctor is here to check you and the baby out, then they'll take you upstairs to maternity. I'll make sure the charge nurse knows what room you're in, so your husband and daughter can come see you when they get here," Meredith promised.

"Thank you both so much. Not just for what you did for my dad, but for my son, too. You two are like my guardian angels," Kerry said gratefully.

Meredith put her hand on Kerry's shoulder, smiling at the tiny baby who nuzzled his face into his mom's warmth. "You're welcome," she said. "We'll be back to check on you and your dad tomorrow."

"Congratulations, again," Derek said, stepping aside so the OB nurse could set up the infant warmer.

Kerry smiled. "Thank you."

Meredith turned around and Derek followed, closing the door to the room after they exited to give Kerry continued privacy. When they were out of view of anyone nearby, Derek pulled her against him and kissed her. The unexpected action made Meredith gasp, but it soon melted into a moan that made her even more eager to cash in on the languid sex they'd been looking forward to all day.

"Hmm, what's this for?" she asked.

"Contact high. I might not come down for hours," Derek said, getting in one last kiss before pulling away. "You were amazing today."

"All in a day's work," Meredith shrugged.

"I think you may need to ask the Chief for a pay raise," he chuckled.

Meredith cocked her head and smiled at his attempt at flattery. "Mhm, okay, lay it on thick," she said, reaching into her pocket when she felt her phone vibrate. "Oh, Bridget sent me a picture."

"Let's see what she got for her this time. My money's on a poofy tutu. Or maybe a sparkly tiara," he said.

Meredith opened the message and a photo of Lilly appeared on the screen, cheesing it up for the camera like a model, clad in crocheted, purple leg warmers and a matching headband.

"Look at her. God, we have the cutest baby on the planet," Derek said, admiring the picture with a grin that reached his eyes. "We need to get that blown up and framed."

"You say that about every picture of her," Meredith accused.

"And we usually do."

"Okay, let's finish up here, so we can go pick her up," Meredith said as she sent a text back to Bridget. "Swaddling a newborn doesn't help my baby fever, so I need to kiss those cheeks as soon as possible to get it out of my system."

"Baby fever, huh?"

Meredith pointed her finger at him playfully. "Don't tempt me, Derek."

...

Lilly splashed her hands on the surface of her bath water, sending drops flying onto the counter like rain. Since switching bath time from the tiny tub she'd outgrown to the sink, the kitchen morphed into a small-scale water park every night.

Meredith walked back to rejoin them after going upstairs to get Lilly's towel, but stood in the doorway when she heard Derek talking to their daughter, always savoring the chances to listen in on their little chats.

"I wish you could've seen Mommy today, Princess. She was incredible. Finds a hematoma, boom. Evacuates it. A baby needs to be delivered. She goes into action. She's like a superhero," Derek said as he lathered shampoo through her hair, smoothing it away from her eyes.

Lilly chewed on her rubber duck that wore a surgical mask and smiled at him, the spitting image of Meredith when smiled. Derek leaned in and kissed her wet forehead. "Yeah, Dr. Duck's got nothing on Mommy."

"I don't know. Dr. Duck has a certain charm about him. But lucky for you, I'm only hot for neurosurgeons with perfect hair," Meredith chimed in as she walked into the kitchen. She draped Lilly's towel over the back of one of the chairs before joining the two of them at the sink.

"Very lucky for me," Derek said. He nudged his hip against hers and smiled. "You okay after today?"

"Yeah. I just, you know, I think about what Kerry's life is, day in and day out, and it makes me feel kind of selfish, you know? For thinking I had it so bad, when there are people who have it much worse," Meredith confessed, running a wash cloth under the stream of warm water. She squirt a dollop of Lilly's bedtime bath soap in the center and squished the cloth in her hand, then began lathering the suds over Lilly's back.

"Selfish? Why would you feel selfish?" he asked.

"My Mom and I never had the easiest... we weren't the typical mother-daughter pairing. She was never around, and when she was, we fought, and I spent most of my life resenting everything she put me through growing up. But still, when she got sick and forgot who I was, it hurt. She could probably do a Whipple with her eyes closed right up until the day she died, but she would look at me like I was a complete stranger," Meredith said.

"Of course that would hurt you. That would hurt anyone," Derek said, tilting Lilly back, so Meredith could wash she shampoo from her hair.

Meredith rinsed her dark, soapy curls with the sprayer attachment, and the bubbles pooled around Lilly's belly, much to her delight.

"I know. And for the most part, I've made peace with it. Really, I have. Today just made me think, that's all._ Both_ of Kerry's parents have dementia. Married for decades, and they need to be introduced every day. And Kerry, she was just so... that's the hand she got dealt, and she accepts it. She fights off the pain, because she has to be strong for them. I can't imagine ever putting that burden on you and Lilly. That scares the hell out of me," she said. She wiped her eyes on her rolled sleeve, then went back to washing off Lilly's shoulders.

Derek frowned, her admittance enough to break his heart in two. "Mer, that's not gonna happen. I don't even want you to think about it. But I promise you, no matter what crap life throws at us, Lilly and I aren't going anywhere. You're stuck with us forever. Right, Lilly? Tell Mommy," he said.

Meredith laughed softly when Lilly looked over at her, a bubble beard on her chin. "Good, because I love you guys too much," she said, gently swiping the bubbles away with her finger before they could get into Lilly's mouth.

"We love you, too," Derek said before kissing her.

Lilly's little giggle finally made them pull back, and they turned toward her to find her watching the two of them. "Oops. Caught in the act."

"Well, I'd rather she catch us kissing than doing... other things, which we're still doing tonight, by the way," Meredith said, slinging Lilly's towel over her shoulder.

Derek picked Lilly up under her arms and held her in the sink, so Meredith could give her one last rinse. "It's been a long day. If you don't want to, it's no big deal," he said.

"No, I want to. My beast has been patiently waiting all day, and I'm really craving the spoony thing," Meredith told him.

"The spoony thing it is," Derek agreed. He spun Lilly from front to back and nodded in approval. "Squeaky clean."

Meredith shook out the large bath towel and quickly switched off with him, swaddling Lilly up to keep her warm. "There we go. Lilly burrito," she said, kissing the baby's soft cheek.

"How about a Lilly sandwich, too?" Derek said as he leaned in and kissed her other cheek.

Lilly shrieked with laughter when she felt Derek's stubble tickle her skin, and the happy sound was enough to change any lingering sadness Meredith had for what life had taken from her into gratitude for how much it gave.


	142. Nine Months Old

**Disclaimer: Last I checked, Grey's still wasn't mine.**

**Thank you as always for your patience! I've been writing this fic for five years now, so to still have so much interest and support from you guys means the world to me. Enjoy!  
**

Derek pressed the record button on the video camera, fully charged and ready for another day of filming. It was March fifth, which meant Lilly was officially nine months old. And while they couldn't say with certainty, they had a feeling that after months of practice and three days' worth of video footage, today would be the day.

"Come on, Lilly! Come to Daddy!" Derek encouraged.

"She's gonna do it. I can feel it," Meredith said, clapping in support for her daughter.

Lilly looked at Derek, her blue eyes wide in willpower. Her hands had finally learned how to keep the rest of her body upright and stable, and with a little coaxing and a lot of pep talks from her cheering squad, the moment she evolved from her signature inchworm move to actual crawling was imminently close. She stretched out a tentative hand, getting a feel for the carpeted surface beneath her, then stretched out the other. The result was a slow slide onto her belly, and she quivered her lower lip in frustration.

"You're okay, peanut. That was a great try," Meredith said, setting her on her bottom briefly, then kissing her forehead. "Here, Mommy will embarrass herself to show you."

Derek zoomed in on Meredith's butt in the air as she assumed a crawling position, too good of an opportunity to pass up. "This is kinda hot," he commented from behind the camera.

Meredith tossed a nearby stuffed giraffe at him and smirked. "Seriously? What if this is the video where she finally crawls that we send to everyone, and there's a nice close-up of my ass for all of your family to see?" she scolded him before turning her attention back to Lilly. "Okay, Lilly, look at Mommy. It goes knee, hand, other knee, other hand," she demonstrated.

Lilly watched with interest as Meredith crawled a few feet across the floor, and the look of pure concentration on her face made Derek smile. "She's soaking it all in like a sponge. We have a genius baby," he boasted.

"Okay, now you try," Meredith said after sitting back down across the room from Derek where Lilly was. She set her back on her hands and knees, and they waited with baited breath as she tried again.

A few seconds passed before she moved forward, just wiggling her tiny butt to get some momentum. And then, without warning, she did it. She pushed off her knee, keeping herself balanced with her hands. She stopped again as she figured out the right knee-hand pattern, and when she did, she took off like a pro.

"Oh my God," Meredith whispered, looking over at Derek, whose mouth was just as agape in surprise.

They watched in silence as she repeated her motion, switching from her right knee to her left then back to her right. She kept her focus on Derek, determined to make it all the way over to him a few feet away. She picked up speed on the last few inches, and when she finally made it over to him, he scooped her up immediately and pressed victory kisses to her cheek.

"Lilly, you did it! That was perfect!" he cheered.

"I can't believe she just did that," Meredith said, joining them on the other side of the room. She pried Lilly away from Derek to get in a few kisses of her own, then hugged her close. "Nine months ago today, I was in labor, waiting for you to be born. Then I blinked, and boom, you're crawling. What did we say about growing up too fast, huh?"

"We're so proud of you, Lillybug. Performing under the pressure of a camera. You'll make a great surgeon one day," Derek said.

Meredith's pager beeped from inside her pocket, and she froze. "No. No no no. I don't want to go to work. This is Lilly's nine month birthday," she said, checking the page as it scrolled across the tiny screen. "They bumped my cordotomy with Nelson up to today instead of tomorrow. Damn it."

"Call out. I'm sure we could come up with an excuse," Derek said as he put Lilly back on the floor, so she could keep on crawling. "We haven't had sex in two weeks. You could use that. Say you need to stay home and get laid."

"Yeah, okay. When that memo lands on the Chief's desk, he won't have a problem with it," Meredith joked, letting out a sigh. "I could really use the OR hours, though. The more I have, the better it looks for the boards. But I really could use the sex, too. And the day off."

"I offered you sex this morning," Derek reminded her.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully. "Lilly was between us. A baby in the bed isn't exactly conducive for hot sex," she said. She smoothed her fingers through Lilly's dark curls, swept away from her forehead by a flowery hair clip. "How am I supposed to be productive at work when you just blew my mind with your crawling? I'll just be bragging about you to everyone all day."

"If it's just for a cordotomy, you should go. Get a fourth year to monitor post-op. You'll be home in three hours, four tops. It'll still be early enough to celebrate with Lilly," Derek said.

"Fine. But don't reach any milestones while I'm gone," Meredith told Lilly, who giggled at her in response. "I'm serious. No walking or doing cartwheels or anything."

Derek chuckled as they both got up off the floor, Lilly sitting on his arm. "I'll make sure she holds off."

...

"I don't know, Lilly. I mean sure, Stuffy can pull off a good joke, but I just don't know what he adds to the show. Now Hallie, she's the one who needs more focus. She's the nurse, so she's the only one with real medical knowledge to offer, and she's got that old soul wisdom, you know?" Derek said, feeding Lilly a spoonful of her applesauce.

"Mmm," Lilly said as she happily munched, turning her attention back to the cartoon they were watching together on the couch.

Derek's phone rang and he reached for it on the end table. "Uncle Mark," he said, answering the call. "Hello?"

"Hey, are you busy?" Mark asked.

"Not really. Just watching _Doc McStuffins_."

"I think I rented that on HBO After Dark a few years ago. Wasn't great. Little early in the day for porn, though, isn't it?" Mark replied.

Derek rolled his eyes. "It's a kiddie cartoon on Disney, Mark. I'm watching it with Lilly."

Lilly patted Derek's thigh when he delayed her next bite of applesauce. "Mmm, Da," she requested.

"Bossy just like Mommy," he grinned, spooning some more into her mouth.

"Oh. My bad. Is Mer there with you? Am I interrupting quality family time?"

"No, she got paged into work, so we're just hanging out until she gets home. I think I'm getting delusional, though. I'm literally sitting here analyzing the merits of a cartoon meant for the under five crowd," Derek said with self-deprecation. "Why? What's up?"

"Feel like coming over to help me assemble a crib? This thing's got a million pieces, and I figured since you're a neurosurgeon who's used to working with boring hardware, you could come give me a hand," Mark said. "Ideally, I would've picked Callie, but she's working, so..."

"Well, I'm flattered to be your second choice," Derek said. "Uh, yeah, I guess I could. We just need to keep Lilly busy and away from the tools."

"She'll just sit there. It'll be fine," Mark shrugged.

"Oh, you haven't heard the latest development. She crawls now," Derek said proudly.

Derek could almost picture the look on Mark's face on the other end of the line. "What? Since when?" Mark asked in shock.

"This morning. We got it on video. Mer and I still can't believe it," Derek replied, giving Lilly a sip from her bottle.

"Now you have to come over, because I need to see it for myself."

"Fine. Just give me a half hour to get packed and drive over there," Derek agreed.

"Gotta say, I'm more eager to see your kid than I am to see you," Mark said.

Derek laughed. "Yeah, most people say that."

...

Meredith sat at the nurses' station, replaying Lilly's crawling video on a loop while she waited for her surgery to start. It was the next best thing to being home, so she was making the most of it.

Cristina dropped down into the chair next to her, a bag of chips in one hand, a chart in the other. "Hey. I thought you had the day off for Lilly's fake birthday thing," she said.

"Oh. Hey," Meredith said as she paused the video. "Yeah, I was supposed to, but my surgery got moved up to today. Bailey's surgery is running late, so I'm just waiting for the OR to open up. And it's not fake. She's nine months old today."

"Whatever. Semi-fake, semi-real birthday," she compromised. "What're you watching?"

"Lilly started crawling this morning. We got a video. Want to see?" Meredith asked.

"Hell yeah," Cristina said in the excited tone that she reserved only for Lilly.

Meredith restarted the video from the beginning, so caught up in her mommy pride that she overlooked the part where Derek zoomed in on her ass. Cristina, though, couldn't resist the smirk that came over her face.

"Let me guess. Derek was the videographer?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. Gotta find a way to edit that out," Meredith said.

They watched Lilly crawl toward the camera like a seasoned champ, and Cristina gasped, in awe of her goddaughter. "No way!" she said.

"Right?"

"She's such a badass. I love her," Cristina gushed, waving Izzie down as she deposited a chart in the bin. "Iz, come here."

"What?" Izzie asked as she spun around.

Meredith held her phone in the air. "Guess who's crawling now."

"No way!" Izzie repeated, pulling over a third chair. "How is she old enough to crawl already?"

"I know. I feel like she should still be kicking me from the inside," Meredith sighed. She restarted the video again, then handed Izzie her phone to watch. "Here you go."

"Wow. Great ass shot," Izzie complimented.

"Thank you."

Izzie's eyes lit up like a child's on Christmas morning as she watched Lilly crawl for the first time. "Look at her go!" she shouted, causing curious glances from those passing by in the hall. "Jeez, she's got speed in that little body of hers."

"I hope you guys baby-proofed the mansion," Cristina said.

"Derek's had the house baby-proofed since I was six months pregnant. Seriously, outlets and all," Meredith laughed, mostly because it was the truth.

Izzie rewound the video, eager to watch it again. "I hope you don't mind if I send this to myself after I watch it a dozen more times," she said.

"Go for it," Meredith said. "Now that she's crawling, I think we're gonna have to move her into her crib at night. The books say to wean babies off co-sleeping once they learn how to crawl, because they're more mobile. I don't want her bolting right off the bed."

"She's still in the bed with you?" Cristina asked. "How do you ever have sex?"

"Cristina," Izzie scolded.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "We do our best. She usually naps in her crib, so if we're both home that day, that's when sex happens. Or we'll sneak off into the shower before she wakes up in the morning. Oh, and whenever any of you guys offer to play with her while she's here, we're probably around the corner in the linen closet or up in Derek's office," she disclosed.

"Eww," Cristina replied.

"Hey, you asked. Anyway, it's been fifteen days since we've... you know," Meredith admitted.

"Fifteen days? That's a Guinness record for you two," Izzie said, finally sending the video to herself.

Cristina frowned in pity for her friend. "Oh, Mer, you need to get laid. Immediately."

"It's not that we don't try. We do. We just get interrupted or sidetracked or pagers go off. Setting aside twenty minutes for sex isn't as easy as it sounds," Meredith said, running a hand through her hair. "I don't know. Getting our bed back at night might be kind of nice. I'm gonna talk to Derek about it. We just need to find a way to make the transition okay for Lilly."

"She's a big, bad crawler now," Cristina reminded her. "How's she ever going to go off to Stanford in eighteen years unless you give her a little more independence?"

"She's right, Mer. Lilly will be fine a few feet down the hall. It'll be harder on you guys than on her," Izzie said in support.

"I know," Meredith said. Her pager beeped, signaling the now open OR, and she pulled it from her hip to silence it. "But you're wrong about Stanford. My baby's a Dartmouth girl," she said, standing up from her chair.

Cristina swiveled around to face her, popping a chip into her mouth. "Yeah, we'll see."

...

Mark sat on the floor of his future baby's nursery, a wide grin spread over his face as he, too, watched Lilly's crawling debut. He'd lost track of how many times he'd restarted it, though based on the progress Derek had made by himself in building the crib, he would guess the number was close to twenty.

"Are you gonna help me at some point?" Derek asked, the instruction manual in one hand, a screwdriver in the other.

"One more minute," Mark said, brushing him off.

"Everyone is smitten with you," Derek told Lilly, who sat next to him, surrounded by the toys Derek had packed to keep her entertained.

Lilly looked up at him and smiled, handing him a foam block. "Dada," she said before busying herself with the remaining pile.

Derek leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "Thank you, Princess."

"God, she's a cute kid. I hope mine's just like her," Mark said, handing Derek his phone back after sending the video to himself.

"She will be. Or he. You guys gonna find out the sex?" Derek asked.

Mark hoisted himself onto his knees beside Derek to help him assemble the crib frame. "Not sure. The little girls in her kindergarten class already gave her a few name suggestions, though. They came up with Princess Sparkle and Buttercup."

"Buttercup Sloan. Kind of stripper-ish, but still catchy," Derek joked.

"We've got a few actual contenders that we've been testing out," Mark said, holding the frame secure while Derek screwed it to the headboard. "Boys names are harder. She suggested my middle name for the baby's. I vetoed that five seconds later."

Derek shook his head. "Everett? Yeah, no, don't do that to the poor kid."

"I still don't know where the hell my parents came up with that one," Mark sighed. "Anyway, she has a whole list of boy names. I vetoed most of those, too. The only ones we can agree on so far are Jacob, Connor and Liam. Every other name has already been stolen by the Shepherd flock."

"Meredith said the same thing," Derek chuckled. "Those are good, strong names, though. We actually had Connor on our list, I think. What about girls?"

"Right now, Charlotte's at the top."

Derek nodded in approval. "That's pretty. I like it."

"I wish the kid would cooperate, so I could get this nursery painted before the birth. I'm already positive it's a girl, but until the OB confirms it, Bridget's not letting me touch the walls," Mark sighed.

"How do you... oh, the penis theory," Derek recalled.

"Mock me all you want, but the Sloans are... impressive. My parents wanted to be surprised with me, but at the twenty week ultrasound, boom, clear as day. No mistaking my gender."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Okay," he said, simply to appease him.

As her dad and uncle talked, Lilly shook her foam ball in amusement. On a particularly high shake with her hands, the ball flew from her arms, skittered across the carpet, and landed on the other side of the room. She considered alerting her dad to get his attention, so he would retrieve it for her, but instead Lilly maneuvered herself onto her knees. She steadied herself, then with every ounce of energy she had, she crawled over to the ball. Once she reached it, she scooted back onto her bottom, and held the toy like a trophy.

"Dada," Lilly called, proudly holding the ball in the air.

Derek glanced over at the spot where Lilly had been sitting with her toys, the look on his face turning to mild panic when he saw that she wasn't there. He whipped his head around and found her sitting by the door, chewing on the foam ball she'd rescued.

"Oh God, Lilly, you scared me," Derek said as he let out a nervous breath. "You crawled over there all by yourself, Princess?"

"She's quick _and_ quiet. Good luck when she's older. One blink, and she'll be sneaking off with your car," Mark said, shutting the bedroom door, so Lilly couldn't escape.

Derek picked up Lilly and her ball, then set her back in the spot where she'd been. "She would never do something like that."

"Grey is her mother. Former rebel without a cause. You don't think she knew which steps creaked or how to _Spiderman_ herself out the bedroom window?" Mark reminded him, securing a hinge on the crib rail.

"You've got a point," Derek admitted. He looped his pinky finger through Lilly's and smiled. "Either way, we don't tell Mommy that you were a foot away from crawling right out the door. What happens in Vegas, right?"

Lilly giggled at him, unconcerned by the pact they were making. Instead, she flopped onto her hands and knees again, taking Derek's pinky with her as she tried to go for another stroll around the room.

"Ow ow ow," Derek said, crawling alongside her as he tried to free his finger from her tight grasp.

Mark took a swig from his bottle of water, looking on with a grin. "She's nine months old, and she's literally got you by the finger," he said. "Like I said, heaven help you when she's eighteen."

...

Lilly wiggled and squirmed, trying to free herself from her bath towel cocoon. With the new found freedom that crawling offered, being swaddled was not her idea of fun. Derek propped her up in his arm as he walked into the living room with her to get her dressed.

"Anxious to go exploring some more?" he asked, laying her on a blanket on the floor. "I promise, I'll have you roaming around as fast as I can."

Derek reached for her basket of diaper supplies that sat under the end table, but by the time he turned back around, Lilly was zipping away on her hands and knees toward Charlie. "Whoa, where are you going, Lillybug?" Derek chuckled, chasing after her.

"Hey," Meredith called out as she opened the front door.

Upon hearing her Mom's voice, Lilly veered to the right to go meet her. She crawled all the way into the foyer before Derek had the chance to pick her up, and Meredith could only laugh when she saw her. "Hey, you. What are you doing?" she asked, scooping her up to keep her warm.

"Our daughter is an escape artist," Derek joked, joining them both in the foyer with a new diaper in his hand.

"Is that why she's naked?" Meredith asked.

"I turned back for two seconds, and she took off like a flash," he said. "How was your cordotomy?"

"Good. Nelson let me do the whole thing, so I got credit as lead surgeon," Meredith replied as they walked back into the living room.

Derek grinned. "That's great! More stuff to add to your boards," he said.

"And everyone loved Lilly's video. She's the talk of the hospital," Meredith boasted, laying Lilly down on the blanket for attempt number two of getting her dressed. "Why did she get a bath so early?"

"We spent the morning at Mark's assembling the crib, and she had a bottle on the way home. The lid must have been screwed on wrong, because when I went to take her out of the car seat, she was covered in milk. She didn't care, though. She thought it was funny," Derek said.

Meredith took the diaper from him and slid it under Lilly's bottom. "Are you driving Daddy nuts today?" she asked, tickling her belly with her finger. "So, crib, huh? Pick up any hints about the gender, or do you think they really don't know?"

"Mark still stands by the penis theory, so he's ready to throw pink paint up on the walls and get the name Charlotte embroidered on everything. But no, they don't know yet," Derek said.

"Charlotte?"

Derek nodded. "They think that's the winner if it's a girl."

"Now they have to pick it," Meredith said.

"Why is that?" Derek asked amusedly, handing Meredith Lilly's cat pajamas.

"Because I've always loved that name. It would have been on our list, except Charlotte Shepherd is a mouthful of 'shh' sounds," Meredith explained as she shimmied Lilly's pants up her legs.

"Oh. Well, next time I see Mark, I'll tell him you approve," Derek said.

Meredith pulled the matching pajama top over Lilly's head and smiled. "Thank you," she said. "So, uh, I was thinking that maybe we should start easing Lilly into her crib at night."

"Yeah?"

Meredith shrugged. "Well, I don't want to, but I think it's probably a good idea. She's crawling now, though. I just think it's safer, especially since she seems to be a mini _Speed Racer_."

"Didn't think of that," Derek sighed. "Maybe we could let her fall asleep with us, then move her. Leaving her in the crib while she's awake might be rough for her. I don't want to make bedtime upsetting for her every night. Then she'll never sleep."

"Yeah, we could try that. I mean, she already sleeps in there for naps sometimes, and she's fine with it. Plus, she's a good sleeper. She barely even wakes up in the middle of the night unless she needs to be changed," Meredith said, rolling her watch around her wrist as the nerves already kicked in.

"She'll be fine. She's ready. Right, Lilly? Tell Mommy it's no big deal," Derek said in an attempt to make Meredith more comfortable with the decision, no matter how tough it would be on all of them at first.

"I know. You just have to keep reminding me," Meredith said. She brushed Lilly's curls into a small bow, then set her free on the floor, so she could resume her crawling. "But I guess there's one perk. You and I can be... spontaneous more often."

"Spontaneous, huh?"

"Mhm," she hummed in agreement, trailing her fingers over his thigh. "Remember back in the day when I would roll on top of you naked in the middle of the night, and we would go at it for hours?"

Derek groaned, keenly aware that Lilly was nearby. "Yeah," he said.

"Or when I would wake up in the morning, and feel you hard and pressing against me. And I would do all of your favorite things," she continued to tease him.

He visibly shivered from the feel of her teeth gently tugging on his earlobe, and the images that filled his brain, both of which were a dangerous combination. "I do... remember that."

Meredith kissed his cheek before she pulled away from him. "That's payback for zooming in on my ass," she laughed.

"Evil woman," he said as he regained composure.

"I know," Meredith smiled in satisfaction. "But until then, I have something for Lilly. I stopped on my way home to get her some strawberry banana rice pudding from that organic baby store by the hospital. Until she's old enough for chocolate, I figured we could celebrate with that for her nine month birthday."

"Sounds good. Wanna try some, Princess?" Derek asked Lilly, who was already crawling over to the coffee table where Meredith had set the rice pudding container.

Lilly reached for the table ledge and pulled herself up onto her feet. Meredith gasped, nudging Derek's side with her elbow. "Derek, look at her."

"No. There's no way," Derek said in awe.

But when Lilly planted her palms on the table surface and placed one foot in front of the other, he quickly fumbled for his phone in his pocket, managing to turn on the video mode by the time she took another step.

"Holy crap, she's walking," Meredith whispered, keeping her eyes trained on her daughter.

"She's going for the pudding."

Slowly and steadily, Lilly walked from one end of the coffee table to the other, never losing her balance. When she made it to the pudding on the other side, she held it up and smiled. "Mmm, Dada!" Lilly said, celebrating her victory.

"Lilly, you did it! You walked!" Meredith cheered. She went over to Lilly and picked her up, her eyes blurring up against her will. "How did you do that? You haven't even been crawling for twelve hours."

Derek sent the video to Meredith's phone, and made sure to save it in his own, just like he'd done with the video from this morning. "No one's gonna believe us. They'll think we Photoshopped it," he chuckled.

"I would, too," Meredith said, pressing kisses to Lilly's cheek. "I am so proud of you."

"Crawling was getting old, huh? Needed to reach two milestones in one day?" he asked.

Meredith handed her to Derek, so he could give her a hug, too. "I'm glad I got home in time to see it," she said.

"It was the motivational rice pudding that did it," Derek said, reaching for the diaper bag that sat on the couch. "I guess now we really need to get her used to the crib. A little more practice, and she'll be leaping from the bed to the dresser."

Meredith grabbed a spoon from the side compartment, then fastened a bib around Lilly's neck. "I know. Just... brace yourself for tears. That's all."

"I think she'll be fine; I really do," Derek said as he spooned some of the rice pudding into Lilly's mouth.

Lilly smiled at the sweet taste, looking up at Meredith. "Mmm," she said in approval.

"I was talking about me," Meredith said before leaning down and kissing the tiny pair of lips. "Is it yummy, Lillybug?"

"Crying tears of joy for how much more sex we're gonna be having," he amended.

Meredith rolled her eyes playfully, hoping he was right. "Whatever you say, Derek."


	143. St Paddy's Day

**Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.**

**Thanks for being so patient! Enjoy!**

It was day eleven of Lilly's big move into her crib. And while her parents knew it was the right thing to do, Lilly's nightly round of tears were getting to both of them. Especially now, when getting out of bed was the last thing either of them wanted to do.

Derek dropped down onto the mattress at Meredith's behest, smiling up at her. "You wanna be on top?" he said, the end of his sentence coming out in a groan when she sank down on him.

"I love riding you," Meredith moaned, rocking her hips in slow circles. When she started moving up and down, Derek's breath caught in his throat, and she laughed at the look on his face. "That good, huh?"

"God, yes," Derek said, trailing his hands up her hips and moving to her breasts.

Meredith threw her head back in pleasure and closed her eyes. "Yeah, keep doing—" she said before the sound of Lilly crying over the baby monitor drowned her out. She froze on top of him, letting out a frustrated sigh. "Come on. Not again."

Derek swallowed thickly as he tried to keep his composure. "She might stop. Let's just wait."

"She's not gonna stop. It's been eleven days, and we've gotten interrupted eight times," Meredith said. She reluctantly lifted off of him, then reached for her robe on the edge of the bed.

"Wait, Mer; she stopped," he said softly, as though talking above a whisper might disturb the momentary peace.

Meredith flung off her robe, then pulled him on top of her. "Okay, go," she said, grabbing hold of his ass.

As much as they yearned for languid, uninterrupted sex, until Lilly got more used to her crib, quick sessions needed to suffice. Derek swiftly thrust back inside her and started moving, trying to get them both to the finish line. But before either of them had the chance to reach it, a large bout of thunder clapped outside, so loud it startled both of them.

Meredith flinched beneath him. "Holy crap!"

"Well, she's up now," Derek said.

Like clockwork, Lilly started wailing over the monitor, and Meredith ran a hand through her hair. "Now she's definitely not gonna stop. I'll get her."

"Maybe we should just let her cry through it. You know, self soothe," Derek suggested.

"Derek, that thunder scared _us_. She's nine months old. Trust me, she's up," Meredith said.

"Damn it." Derek reluctantly withdrew, both of them sighing at the loss of contact.

"I don't like it any more than you do."

"Which is why we need to let her cry once in a while," Derek replied.

Meredith shrugged her robe on and tied it around her waist. "Would you really rather have sex with Lilly crying in the background?"

"I need to take a shower. Again," Derek said, getting out of bed and going into the bathroom.

Meredith shook her head in frustration as she walked out of their room and into the hallway toward Lilly's nursery. As much as she knew Lilly was okay and Derek was right that she needed to self soothe sometimes, the sound of her daughter's crying was still enough to break her heart in two, and ignoring it wasn't nearly as simple as the parenting books made it out to be.

She opened Lilly's bedroom door, and saw her laying in her crib, steady streams of tears running down her rosy cheeks. When she saw Meredith, she reached out her arms, wanting to be held.

"Hey, baby girl. Did the thunder scare you?" Meredith cooed. She picked Lilly up out of her crib and held her close. "You're okay. Mommy's here."

Lilly hiccuped, her head buried in Meredith's chest. Meredith rocked her back and forth, wiping the tears off Lilly's face with the sleeve of her robe. "Thunder sucks, I know. Believe me, I _really_ hate it tonight. Five minutes later, and we would've been in the clear."

Rather than go back into her bedroom and deal with Derek's attitude when Lilly was already upset enough for all three of them, Meredith walked over to the rocking chair in the corner. "We can hang out in here for a while. Daddy's not in a great mood right now—but not because of you. It's me. Or, well, me and Daddy, and what we were trying to do before the stupid thunder ruined it," Meredith rambled, putting her feet up on the ottoman.

Lilly laid her head on Meredith's breasts, the sound of her mom's voice calming her down. Meredith smiled, still in awe that she could provide someone with such comfort by doing so little. "I know these past few days haven't been easy on you," she said, tucking Lilly into her robe and pulling the sides over her like a blanket. "It's hard for us, too. We all got used to waking up together every morning and having quiet time with you before getting up for work."

Meredith kissed the top of Lilly's head, breathing in the smell of her baby shampoo. "I know we're doing the right thing. For the most part, you even sleep through the night, unless you get hungry or need a change. When you're a teenager, you'll probably want a lock on your door to keep us from bothering you. But sleeping on your own is new and different, and a little scary at first. You're doing so good, though."

Lilly looked up at Meredith with a tired smile on her face, babbling away as though she were taking part in the conversation. "Oh, you don't say?" Meredith played along. "You're getting so big, peanut. I think that's why it's hard to give you a little more independence, too. You're talking more. You only crawled for, like, six hours before you started walking. Your first birthday is three months away. I miss when you were that squishy newborn who couldn't even hold her head up," she said, trying to stifle a yawn with no luck.

Lilly caught the yawn, then put her thumb in her mouth, always a telltale sign of sleepiness. Meredith placed a protective hand on Lilly's back and the other on her bottom. "Since I'm too comfy to move anyway, how about we just sleep like this? Wake me up when you're hungry, okay?" Meredith said softly, kissing the top of Lilly's head.

After Lilly closed her eyes and went back to sleep, Meredith let herself sleep, too. Her daughter needed her, and that trumped whatever any parenting book may have said.

When Meredith woke up the next morning, she blinked blearily around the room as she remembered where she was. The alarm on her phone beeped incessantly, and she quickly silenced it. She saw a yellow Post-it stuck to the arm of the rocking chair, her eyes adjusting to the light as she read the note on it.

_Got paged in for surgery at 5. Didn't want to wake you, so I set the alarm on your phone so you wouldn't oversleep. See you at work. Love you both. - Derek_

She noticed the throw blanket Derek had draped over them, and she smiled at the gesture. "Maybe this is Daddy's olive branch after last night. I really hope so, Lilly, because it's St. Paddy's Day, and if Daddy would like to get lucky tonight, it's in his best interest not to be grumpy today."

...

Derek sat on the couch in the attending lounge, scribbling post-op notes in the chart on his lap. He reached for his coffee on the end table and chugged a large sip. It was already his second of the day, but so far, the caffeine wasn't doing much for him.

"Morning," Mark greeted as he walked into the room.

"Morning," Derek returned.

Mark dropped down onto the adjacent couch. "You look like hell," he commented.

"Didn't sleep much last night," Derek said, running a hand through his hair.

"Aah. Up all night doing the horizontal mambo?" Mark asked.

"Well, it started out that way, but no," Derek answered. "The storm scared Lilly, so we had to stop."

"Couldn't you just get her back to sleep, then pick up where you left off? No need to waste the woody."

Derek shrugged, choosing to ignore the last part of what Mark had said. "We were both annoyed at each other anyway, so it didn't matter," he sighed. "It's not that I don't see where Meredith is coming from. I do. I hate it when Lilly's upset, too. But we haven't had uninterrupted sex since she started sleeping in her crib."

Mark narrowed his eyes in confusion. "Wasn't that the whole point of moving her to the crib?"

"That's what we thought," Derek couldn't help but laugh. "I don't know. It's just hard enough to make time for each other with work and Lilly as it is. And now, I'm pretty sure Mer's pissed off at me, so it should be a pretty fun day."

"Take her out for some drinks tonight. It's St. Paddy's Day. We'll watch Lilly for you," Mark offered.

"Really?"

"Bridget's pregnant, so it's not like we were planning on Joe's anyway. And if Lilly's there, Bridg won't make me watch any childbirth videos. I'd rather change ten diapers than see any more babies crowning," Mark said with a shudder.

"Thanks for that visual," Derek joked. "Trust me, though; there's nothing greater than seeing your wife give birth to your baby. Million times better than any surgery."

"When it's my own wife, sure. Not when it's someone else's," Mark shook his head. "Anyway, let me know about tonight. If you want Grey to play with your... Irish potatoes, a little tequila could really help with that."

"My Irish potatoes? What are you—" Derek said before the euphemism clicked in his brain. "Oh. That's disgusting, Mark."

"Hey, it's the truth," Mark upheld.

Derek pulled his phone from his pocket when it signaled a text. "I need to go meet Mer. She's here with Lilly. And thanks for comparing my balls to Irish potatoes. Those are ruined forever now," he said, signing his name to the chart and flipping it closed.

"You would've found that funny if you were getting laid," Mark said.

Derek patted Mark's shoulder as he headed for the door. "Yeah. Just you wait..."

He took the elevator downstairs and walked to the resident lounge where Meredith and Lilly were. He was keeping his fingers crossed that her friends wouldn't be in there, so the two of them could talk, but when he entered the room, they were all still gathered, getting ready for the day.

"You're just the prettiest, little girl. Yes you are," Izzie told Lilly, who was dressed in her shamrock shirt and a pair of green leggings.

Derek grinned at his daughter, whose eyes lit up when she saw him. "Dada!" she greeted him.

"Hey, Princess. You look beautiful," Derek said. Izzie handed Lilly over to him, and he kissed the baby's chubby cheek. "Where's Mer?"

"Getting changed," Izzie replied, holding up a Tupperware container. "Irish potato? I made them last night."

Derek's conversation with Mark was too fresh in his mind to even consider the possibility of eating one, and he could only smile as he tried to get the visual out of his mind. "Maybe later. I haven't had a decent breakfast yet. Thank you, though," he declined.

"Hey," Meredith said, coming up behind them dressed in her scrubs. "Thanks for watching her, Iz."

"No problem," Izzie said. "Oh, and let me know about Derek's birthday."

"I will. Thank you," Meredith smiled, following Derek out into the hall with Lilly.

"What about my birthday?" Derek asked.

"She offered to watch her overnight in case you and I wanted to do something," Meredith told him, clipping her name badge to her pocket.

"Might be the only way we actually get to have sex and finish," Derek said.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Okay. So you _are_ still mad about last night."

"Mad? No. Frustrated? Yeah," Derek admitted.

"And I'm not?"

"Mer, I don't want to fight. Especially not in the hospital hallway, or in front of Lilly," Derek said.

"Neither do I. And we have to meet Cristina anyway. She's watching Lilly while we're in surgery. I was going to suggest sex before we scrub in, but I'm really not in the mood anymore," Meredith said, pulling her hair back into ponytail.

Cristina cleared her throat to get their attention, and they turned around to find her standing awkwardly behind them. "Oh. Hey," Meredith said, her face blushing in embarrassment.

"Hey. Reporting for duty. Tell me what I need to do," Cristina said, taking a small notebook and a pen from her bag. "Just give me the Cliffs Notes version."

"I wrote out a list already. Bottles, feeding, burping, nap time; it's self-explanatory. Oh, and she's pretty mobile now, so watch her like a hawk. Seriously, one blink, and she's across the room. And she can walk when she holds onto furniture, so just make sure she's careful," Meredith said.

"Got it," Cristina nodded.

"Thanks, Yang. We appreciate it," Derek said, kissing Lilly's forehead. "Have fun, Lillybug. We'll pick you up in a few hours, okay?"

Meredith held out her arms and Derek passed her over. "Aunt Cristina is very entertaining. Maybe you two can have a dance party. How's that sound?" she said. "We love you, Lilly."

"She's my buddy. We always have fun," Cristina said, bouncing Lilly in her arm after Meredith reluctantly handed her off.

Meredith leaned in and got one last kiss to get her through the next few hours. "Okay, be good. We'll see you soon."

"Does that mean I can't take her bar hopping?" Cristina asked.

"No, you may not," Meredith laughed.

"Bye bye, crazy, overprotective parents," Cristina waved Lilly's little hand before the two of them walked toward the elevator.

"Bye, peanut," Meredith waved back. After they rounded the corner, she looked at Derek, unsure of what to say. "I um... when is our surgery?"

"At nine," he said.

Meredith checked her watch, then scanned the hallway for potential onlookers. When the coast was clear, she reached for his hand. "Let's go, then."

"What? Where are we going?" Derek asked as he followed her.

"Well, having sex at home hasn't been working recently, so we may as well do it here," she said, pulling him into the on call room at the end of the hall, then locking the door behind them.

"Here? My office is right upstairs," Derek said.

"Too far away," Meredith replied, gasping when Derek picked her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he walked them over to the bed, pulling him on top of her after she landed with a soft thud on the mattress. "Still annoyed at me?"

"Medium," Derek said before cupping his cheeks and kissing her. "You?"

Meredith snaked her hands under his shirt, her fingertips trailing down his abdomen. "Same," she said, tipping her head back when she felt his lips on her neck. "A quickie could help with that, though."

Derek was untying the drawstring to her scrub pants when their pagers went off at the same time, filling the quiet of the room with the incessant, jarring beep. Meredith banged on the mattress with her fists and shook her head. "Okay, I give up."

"We're never gonna have sex again, are we?" Derek asked, pulling his pager from the clip on his pants.

"No, we're not," Meredith said as she sat up. "What happened?"

"Neuro consult in the ER. Blown pupil from a bar fight in curtain six," Derek said. "8:15, and the drunken stupidity begins."

"Damn it," Meredith sighed. She swung her legs over the side of the bed, adjusting her rumpled clothes. "Well, wasn't my fault this time."

"I never said last night was your fault."

"You didn't have to say it. I know that's what you're thinking," she said. "Come on. Let's just go. My back hurts from sleeping in the rocking chair last night, I'm horny, and fighting with you isn't going to help either of those things."

"Fine, let's go," Derek agreed, holding the door open for her.

They took the elevator down to the pit, and as Derek had predicted, the first round of drunken stupidity was already piling in. Split lips, glass shards sprinkled in scalps, and plenty of banana bag IVs to go around. Meredith grabbed curtain six's clipboard from the bin at the nurses' station, scanning her eyes over the notes the intern had jotted down.

"Shawn Scanlon, twenty-eight, got into a bar fight with another patron. Sustained black eye and possible skull contusion. Tender on palpation. He was unconscious when EMTs arrived at the scene, but regained consciousness during admission. Slightly intoxicated, so Hunt ordered a banana bag IV, and requested a neuro consult," Meredith said, shaking her head. "Well, that's lovely."

Derek pulled back the curtain, and they saw that the man was passed out asleep, a woman next to him reading a magazine. "Hi, I'm Dr. Shepherd. This is Dr. Grey," Derek greeted the woman. "Are you with him?"

"Yeah, hi. I'm Bethany, Shawn's fiancée. Although, today, I have no idea why. Shawn, wake up. The doctors are here to see you," Bethany said, nudging his shoulder gently.

"What? Oh. Hey. You two here to fix me up, so I can get back to the bachelor party?" Shawn asked with slurred speech.

"You were at a bachelor party at eight in the morning?" Meredith asked.

"_My_ bachelor party. Getting married tomorrow!" Shawn nearly cheered.

Bethany rolled her eyes. "Yeah, we'll see," she murmured.

"Can you tell us what happened?" Derek asked the man, pulling out a pen so he could take notes while Meredith examined him.

"Me and my buddies were at the bar. Some jerk said something; next thing you know, we're in the middle of a bar brawl. I'm fuzzy on the rest. I think I blacked out," Shawn said, flinching when Meredith pressed his against temple with her fingers. "Ouch!"

"Do you have a headache, too, Mr. Scanlon?" Meredith asked.

"Kinda, yeah. But that could be from the booze," Shawn shrugged.

"His right pupil is fixed and dilated. I want to get him up to CT to rule out a brain bleed," Meredith said.

Derek nodded in agreement. "Yeah, let's get him up there."

"Then what? I'm free to go?" Shawn asked.

"If you don't need surgery, maybe. But we may decide to keep you here for observation," Meredith answered, trying to keep her patience in check.

"You think he'll be okay, though, right? I mean, it's nothing serious?" Bethany asked, nervously spinning her engagement ring around her finger.

Derek smiled at the woman in reassurance. "It's really just a precaution. There's no need to worry unless there's a reason to."

"I'm going to page an intern to take you for the scan, and we'll meet you upstairs shortly, okay?" Meredith said.

Derek closed the curtain to give them privacy, and he and Meredith walked toward the nurses' station, their previous annoyance at one another transferred to their patient. He dropped the clipboard onto the desk and scribbled his signature under the notes he'd written down.

"Do you think he really could have a brain bleed?" Meredith asked.

"He hit his head when he fell, and I don't like the way his pupil looks. We can't do a reliable GCS measure, because he's drunk. I don't want to take any chances. Can you call up to pre-op, and tell them we might need to hold the OR for Hartman's surgery at nine, unless Nelson or Weller is available?" he asked, reaching for the phone to have an intern paged.

"Yeah." Meredith grabbed the phone on the opposite side of the desk and started dialing.

"Interrupted from having sex by an idiot who's drunk at eight in the morning," Derek mumbled to her under his breath.

Meredith sighed. "Yeah. Always fun."

...

"Hey, how is she?" Meredith asked Cristina, holding the phone to her ear as she waited for Mr. Scanlon's CT results to show up. Derek placed a hot cup of coffee in front of her and she smiled over at him. Grudgy or not, she always appreciated coffee, especially when it came from him. "Thank you," she mouthed.

"She's fine. We read that book about the mouse, then the annoying hippo one with all the alliterations. And now, she's eating a snack," Cristina said, giving Lilly a spoonful of the puréed berries and bananas that Derek made for her.

"I miss her," Meredith frowned.

Cristina laughed. "Mer, you saw her an hour ago. We're literally right across the street. You could probably look out the window and see us in the apartment," she pointed out.

"Shut up," Meredith replied, taking a sip of her coffee.

"How are things there? I can't believe I'm missing St. Paddy's Day in the ER to crawl around on the floor with your kid," Cristina said. "No offense, Lilly."

"Mmm, nana," Lilly requested with a smile.

"Jeez, pushy," Cristina told her, giving her another bite.

Meredith laughed when she overheard the exchange, her daughter's tiny voice enough to make her want to play hooky from work just to be with her. "That's my girl," she said proudly. "And believe me, you're not missing much right now. Just the usual liquor-induced stupidity."

"Scans are coming up," Derek said, wheeling his chair closer to the computer monitor.

"Okay, I gotta go. Tell Lilly we love her," Meredith said.

"Alright, talk to you later," Cristina said before ending the call.

Images of Shawn's brain loaded on the screen, showing slices at every angle. They reviewed them closely, both of their eyes locking on the brain bleed in his right temporal lobe when they saw it. "Damn it. Look at the size of that thing," Derek said, zooming in closer. "He's probably had that aneurysm for years for it to be that big."

"It looks like it's already burst. There's blood leaking into the surrounding tissue. We need to clamp it off before he hemorrhages to death," Meredith said, pushing the button on the wall. "Aaron, can you get him out of there? We need to take him to surgery," she told the tech behind the booth.

"He's sedated, so we need to get Bethany to sign the consent form. She's his power of attorney. Tell her what's going on, have her sign the form, then meet me in the OR," Derek said as they walked out into the hall.

Meredith nodded, walking briskly to the waiting area and trying to keep her demeanor calm and collected. Being the bearer of bad news was one of the least favorite parts of her job, and made her wish even more she could just walk across the street and hang out with her daughter.

And it didn't get much better inside the OR, either. By the time Meredith scrubbed in, Derek had already done the craniotomy, and was trying to control the bleeding, with little success. Meredith joined him at the head of the table, peering into Shawn's brain, but the only thing she saw was blood.

"Oh, Derek," she whispered under her mask. She took the suction from him, so he could try to track the bleeding back to the aneurysm, hidden under all the red.

"I know. It's coming out faster than the IV infusions are replacing it," Derek said. "We need to widen the craniotomy, otherwise his brain is going to swell. Drill three burr holes three inches from the initial cut, then remove the skull piece."

"Me?" Meredith asked as he handed her the drill.

Derek stepped aside, then nodded his head for her to move into his spot. "Yeah, I want you to do it. Easy in, easy out."

"Thank you," Meredith said, positioning the drill in the correct area. She drilled the first hole without pause, then moved onto the second.

Derek smiled, proud of her work both as her teacher and her husband. "Excellent, Dr. Grey," he said, turning to Pam, one of the scrub nurses. "What's his BP?"

Pam glanced at the monitor. "Still low. 88 over 56. Temp. is at 97."

"Alright. We're running out of O-negative, too. We're gonna need more."

"I'll call down to the blood bank," Pam said.

"Thank you."

Meredith finished drilling the burr holes, then carefully gave the drill back to Bokey. "Fine tipped bone saw, please?" she requested. After Bokey placed it in her hand, Meredith began making the delicate cut into Mr. Scanlon's skull, careful not to slice into his brain tissue underneath. "Got it," she said, plucking off the piece of skull she'd removed.

She dropped it into the metal basin Bokey held out, and Derek immediately suctioned the area before it could fill with blood. "There it is," he said, pointing to the aneurysm. "This thing's the size of a golf ball. No wonder he's leaking blood by the pint. Alright, get me the biggest clamp you can find."

"Pressure's dropping. Down to 80 over 46," Pam said.

"He's losing too much blood," Meredith said, handing Derek a clamp, the only one large enough to fit around the aneurysm neck. She looked up at the monitor and shook her head. "Down to 70 over 40. Derek, we're losing him."

"I know that," Derek snapped. "The whole thing is starting to dissect. This clamp isn't holding, and he's still bleeding out. Turn up the suction and keep putting O-neg in the rapid infuser. Mer, keep draining."

When the man's brain continued to hemorrhage, and started streaming into a puddle at their feet, Derek exhaled, unwilling to let Shawn go down without a fight, despite the ominous looks from all the others gathered in the OR. "Be ready with the crash cart. The clamp isn't doing anything to stop the bleeding. There's too much damage," he said.

"Heart stopped!" Pam announced.

"Gannon, get in there and shock him," Derek told the intern.

She went into action, rubbing the paddles together while a nurse charged up the machine. Meredith shook her head. "Derek, he's DNR," she said.

"I don't care. He's twenty-eight, and he's getting married tomorrow. Gannon, shock him. One, two, three, three sixty," Derek upheld.

The intern did as she was instructed, but even after completing all four charges, the high pitch of the flatline still rang out in the OR. Derek pursed his lips beneath his mask, nodding his head toward the nurse to turn the monitor off. The deafening quiet that followed was even more jarring than the flatline, and Derek couldn't stand in there for another minute.

"Call it, Dr. Grey," he said, pulling off his loupes and headlight, setting them on the tray.

Meredith looked up at the wall, the tears in her eyes blurring the numbers on the clock. "Time of death: 9:56."

She followed him out into the scrub room, anxious to strip off her blood-soaked gown and gloves. She watched Derek as he did the same, tossing his soiled gown into the trash bin. "We did everything we could have done," Meredith said softly.

"I know," Derek nodded as he took two bars of soap from the box above the sink.

When he handed one to her, she smiled. "Thank you."

They scrubbed their hands side by side in silence, dried them, then walked into the hall, heading for the waiting area where Bethany was hoping for good news that they didn't have. Days like this always had a way of putting things into perspective, and suddenly, playing the blame game for interrupted sex seemed so irrationally stupid that they both would have laughed under different circumstances.

Derek reached for her hand and squeezed. "I'm sorry," he whispered, smiling at her as best he could.

"I know. Me, too," Meredith said. She wrapped both her arms around him, hugging him tight. She knew he needed it as much as she did, and she melted into him when he hugged her even tighter. "Love you."

"I love you, too."

When they pulled back nearly a minute later, Meredith took his hand again. "Ready to go tell Bethany?" she asked.

As much as neither of them wanted to, Derek nodded, grateful that he didn't have to do it alone. "Yeah. Let's go."

...

The rest of their shift went by quickly despite the rough start, and they were more than ready to leave the building by the end of it. After they picked up Lilly from Cristina's, the only place they wanted to go was home, choosing to forgo Mark's babysitting offer to spend the night with their daughter. Losing a patient was always hard, but Lilly had of way of making things better, something they both needed.

Lilly gripped Derek's fingers as she walked across the floor, Derek waddling behind her on his knees. "That's it. See, you're getting the hang of it," he said encouragingly.

Meredith smiled at Lilly, clad in her green leprechaun pajamas. "I think she's just humoring you. She can probably walk without holding onto anything, but just wants to make you feel useful," she joked.

"Probably, yeah."

"Come on, Lilly. Come to Mommy," Meredith said, holding her arms out.

"Mamama," Lilly said, her little legs speeding up, eager to reach her.

Meredith's eyes went wide when she heard Lilly speak, and it nearly took her breath away. "Lilly, you said Mama!" she gasped. Lilly made it to Meredith's arms, and was instantly stamped with kisses all over her cheeks. "Derek, she finally said it."

"Maybe she's been saving it for the right time," Derek said as he kissed the crown of her head. "That was so great, Princess."

"Well, she picked a good day for it. We needed that today, Lillybug," Meredith said. "Mommy loves you so much."

Lilly put her chubby hand on Meredith's cheek and smiled, showing off her side by side pair of bottom teeth. "Mama," she repeated.

"Are you trying to make me cry?" Meredith asked, breathing in her daughter's soft curls. "I wish we could've gotten that on tape."

"It's okay, we'll get it. She'll be saying it all the time now, just like Dada. Right, Lilly?" Derek said, tickling Lilly's belly with his finger.

"A dada!" Lilly shrieked with laughter.

"I love that sound. Much better than trying to have S-E-X," Derek chuckled.

Meredith looked up at him and smirked. "It's still St. Paddy's Day. We're going to get lucky, come hell or high water."

"Oh, yeah?" Derek asked.

"We've been you-know-what blocked too many times, and mama needs an orgasm," Meredith said.

"Mama," Lilly echoed again, bouncing her knees while Meredith helped keep her steady.

Meredith bit her lip. "Oops. Probably shouldn't have said that in front of you."

"She spent the day with Cristina. She probably heard worse," Derek pointed out. "How about a celebration snack before bottle and bedtime, Lilly?"

"Oh, that reminds me. I have Irish potatoes in my bag from Izzie. You and I can eat those to celebrate," Meredith said, putting Lilly on her hip before standing up.

"Yeah, I um... I think I'll pass."

Meredith reached into her bag and pulled out the large Tupperware container. "Why? I thought you loved Irish potatoes?" she asked, popping one into her mouth.

"I did. Until Mark compared them to my balls today. I'll never look at them the same way again," Derek said.

Meredith stopped mid-chew and peered into the container, the visual now burned into her own brain. "Oh God, he's gross."

"Ruined forever, right?" Derek laughed.

Meredith nodded, using all her willpower to chew and swallow. "Yes, they are."


	144. Derek's Birthday

**Disclaimer: Shonda owns Grey's. Nursing school owns me. I own nothing.  
**

**Sorry for the very long wait! Enjoy!**

Derek stretched his tired limbs, sated after a night of pre-birthday celebration sexing that Meredith surprised him with as an early present. He rolled onto his side and smiled when he saw her sound asleep next to him. Years later, and he still loved watching her sleep, soaking in the chance whenever he could. **  
**

He wrapped his arm around her hip, pulling her against him. Meredith shuffled beneath the blanket and peeked her eyes open. "Hmm, hey," she said softly. "Happy Birthday."

"Thank you," he whispered, kissing her forehead. "Didn't mean to wake you up. Go back to sleep."

Meredith trailed her hand down his torso, making a slow descent south. "Doesn't the birthday boy want sex?" she asked, stroking him lightly with her fingertips.

"I'm going to _need_ sex if you keep doing that," Derek groaned, blood already being shunted to his groin at her touch.

"Well then." Meredith rolled on top of him, the sheet pooling around her waist, leaving her naked above him. "Maybe I can help you with that."

"What if Lilly..."

Meredith leaned down, pressing her lips to his jawline. "I checked on her an hour ago when I got up to pee. She's still happy as a clam, sound asleep in her crib."

"Slept through the night in the crib again," Derek said.

"I know. Two weeks in a row," Meredith smiled with both pride for her daughter, and gratitude for her sex life. "Which is why you and I _haven't_ been sleeping through the night."

Derek chuckled, his hands roaming on her thighs. "Hmm, for fun reasons."

"Very fun," she said, moaning when she felt his fingers right where she wanted them. "You're really making your birthday happy for me, too."

"We did all my favorite things last night. It's the least I can do," he smirked.

"Your favorite things also happen to be my favorite things. Trust me, I was happy to do it. Or if we're being technical, do you," Meredith said, grinding her pelvis into his. "How do you want me, Derek?"

Derek easily flipped them over, so he was on top, then combed his fingers through her hair. "You did a lot of work last night. I'll give you a break," he said, curling his arms under her shoulders.

She bit her lip in anticipation when she felt him hard and throbbing, pressing against her. "Wow, someone's ready," she giggled.

"When it comes to you? Always."

And after their long, lazy round of morning sex under their cocoon of blankets, Derek rested his head on her chest as they caught their breaths, Meredith's heart thudding against his ear. "God, I love you," he panted.

Meredith kissed his forehead, smiling against his skin. "Love you, too."

"This is the best birthday ever."

"Your first birthday with Lilly here," Meredith said.

"I know. That's why I'm really tempted to call out of work today," Derek chuckled, finally rolling off of her and onto his back.

Meredith leaned into him and draped her arm over his torso. "Good thing you don't have work today, then."

"I have follow-ups scheduled from eleven to three," Derek said, narrowing his eyes at her. "Did you get me the day off?"

"Maybe."

"Wait, how?" he asked.

"I rescheduled the follow-ups for yesterday, skipped lunch, and Nelson took over the brain biopsies I was supposed to do. I wanted to get everything done, so you wouldn't have to go in," Meredith shrugged.

Derek stared at her and smiled, in quiet awe of the gesture. "Did you really?"

"I did," she said. "Which means we can do whatever you want... and keep in mind, we have a baby now, so we can't stay in bed and have sex all day like we did last year."

"Last year, you were seven months pregnant. The 'sex all day' thing was your idea," he reminded her.

"And if your sperm do their job, I'll be pregnant again on your next birthday," Meredith said.

A grin came over Derek's face that reached his eyes. "I hope so."

"Me, too," she said softly, kissing him before sitting up. "Okay, let's go wake Lilly up. I need to kiss our already existing baby, so I don't let you knock me up with another one today."

Derek laughed as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, walking toward his dresser. "What are we doing instead, then?" he asked, putting on a pair of boxers.

Meredith sighed as her favorite part of him became concealed by clothing. "It's your birthday. Up to you," she said as she, too, got dressed.

"If it's warm enough, maybe we could walk over to the clearing by the water and eat lunch. Lilly could splash her toes in the water. Charlie could run around," Derek suggested, slipping a tee shirt over his head.

"I'd like that," Meredith said.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. We've never had Lilly out at the water before. It'll be fun," she smiled, the two of them walking out into the hall toward Lilly's nursery. "Besides, I've been looking for an excuse for her to wear her sunglasses. Once summer comes, I'm breaking out her bikinis, too."

Derek sighed. "Oh, jeez. I forgot about those."

"What? It's not like she's wearing a thong, or has boobs to fill out the top," Meredith pointed out. "If it makes you feel better, I'll wear mine, too."

"Hmm, that would make me feel better."

"Okay, then," she said. She opened Lilly's door and they both stopped when they saw her standing up, holding onto the crib rail as though she were waiting for them.

"Mama Da!" Lilly greeted them, reaching out her arms.

Derek picked her up and hugged her to him. "Morning, Princess. Just hanging out in here?"

"I think someone actually likes her crib now," Meredith said before pressing kisses to Lilly's cheek. "Either that, or she's just pumped that it's Dada's birthday. Right, Lillybug?"

Lilly nuzzled her face into Derek's chest and smiled. "A dada," she said, bouncing in his arm.

"Yeah. And we can eat some of the banana ice cream we made later on, too. How's that sound?" Derek said.

"When did you guys make ice cream?" Meredith asked as she took a fresh diaper from the stack on the dresser.

"Yesterday when you were at work, getting me the day off," Derek chuckled, laying Lilly down on the changing table. "I found it in the baby recipe book Liz sent us. Sugar free and full of all this natural stuff. We taste-tested it. It's pretty good, actually."

"Ma, nanas," Lilly chatted, looking up at Meredith.

"You are so smart. Do you know that?" Meredith asked her.

Derek watched the exchange as he changed Lilly's diaper, smiling at the two of them. Before moving to Seattle, his own birthday didn't mean much to him. Another year older, another day on the calendar. But now, he couldn't imagine spending it with anyone else. "I really owe you for the day off. Thank you, Mer," he said.

Meredith reached for a bow from Lilly's bin of hair supplies. "You can make it up to me tonight."

"Oh, yeah? How?"

"I'd rather not say in front of our daughter," Meredith said, raising her eyebrows at him.

Derek laughed. "That's all I need to know, then."

...

Lilly held her parents' fingers in her tiny hands as she walked in her sandals on the grass. She was minutes away from walking on her own, as much as Meredith and Derek just wanted her to stay little. She giggled when she felt the grass tickle her toes, and the happy sound made them smile.

"Well, it was a fifty-fifty chance, but by some stroke of luck, Lilly inherited my nature-loving gene," Derek said proudly.

"Hey, I like nature," Meredith defended. "I agreed to move to the wilderness with you, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did. And I'm still wondering how I managed that one," he teased, both of them stopping when Lilly knelt down.

She plucked a dandelion from the grass and handed it to Derek. "Fa, Dada," she offered.

"Thank you, Princess," Derek praised her. "Hey, what about Mommy?"

Lilly pulled another of the wispy, white flowers, holding it up to Meredith. "Fa, Mama."

"Thank you, peanut. I love it," Meredith said. "How about we sit here, so you can pick all the flowers you want?"

"Yeah, this is good. We can walk up to the water after we eat," Derek agreed.

He knelt down next to Lilly and pulled the blanket from the bag he'd been holding, shaking it out. Meredith grabbed the other side and they smoothed it over the grass. Derek placed Lilly close to the edge, so she would have access to her small patch of flowers, then Charlie sprawled out behind her, always the protective big brother.

"Good boy," Meredith said, ruffling his fur with her hand. She took off her shoes and Lilly's, both of them stretching their toes. "This is the life, isn't it, Lillybug?"

Derek sat down on the other side, so Lilly was between them. "Sleeping in, morning S-E-X, warm, sunny day with my favorite girls. Nothing better," he said, pressing a kiss to the top of Lilly's head, covered in ringlets of curls. "Her hair's getting a little lighter. I think she's gonna have your color when she gets older."

Meredith combed her fingers through Lilly's hair and smiled. "It does look lighter in the sun," she said. "See? There _is_ some Grey in her."

"Good. She can keep Mark Sloan Jr. in line," Derek chuckled.

Meredith reached for the bag of food sitting behind them, quickly turning her head. "So it's a boy?" she asked in surprise.

"Oh, I don't know. The kid still won't give them a 'between the legs' shot at any ultrasound, which sounds like some kind of prank Mark would pull, so it probably is a boy. I'm just saying, Lilly can be a ballsy, badass blonde like you."

"Dirty blonde," she corrected him.

Derek smirked, taking the sandwich she handed him. "Yes, I'm aware your dirtiness," he said. "Big fan, actually."

"Good."

"Dududs!" Lilly squealed, pointing the water in front of them.

They both looked to where Lilly was pointing and saw a small family of ducks in the shallow water. "You see the duckies, Lillybug?" Meredith asked.

Lilly wiggled her tiny bottom in excitement as she watched the ducks swim by, lined up in a row, and Derek scooped her onto his lap, so she could see them better. "Yeah. There's one, two, three, four baby ducks, and the one in the front is the mommy duck," Derek told her.

"Ma dud," Lilly repeated.

"That's right. Aren't they cute?" Derek said.

Meredith pulled her phone from her pocket and hit the camera button. "Lilly, smile for Mommy," she said once the ducks swam away, so Lilly would be willing to look at her without distraction.

Derek pressed his cheek against Lilly's, the tickle of his stubble on her skin making her laugh. Meredith snapped the picture of the two of them smiling, immediately saving it to her phone. "Okay, I take back the Grey comment. She looks like your clone in this," Meredith said, handing her phone to him.

Derek grinned when he saw it, both of them cheesing it up for the camera, matching curly hair and blue eyes. "God, she's beautiful. I may have said this before, but seriously, who needs work? I say we quit and make babies full time," he joked.

"We're very good baby makers," Meredith said, taking Lilly when she reached her chubby arms out.

"Well, we're getting lots more practice, now that Lilly sleeps in her big girl crib," Derek said. "Not to mention all of the practice we get at work. Faking urgent consults was a great idea, by the way."

"Sometimes, I just need to get laid... urgently. And frequently. Especially when I'm bored and have twenty minutes to kill," Meredith said before taking a bite of her own sandwich. "If we had work today, there would have been an urgent birthday consult in the on-call room."

"That's okay. You made it up to me this morning," he smirked.

"And I'm not done. Bendy thing, counter top, you name it," Meredith said, spooning some puréed peaches into Lilly's mouth.

"Really?"

"Really."

Lilly clapped her hands as she chewed her peaches, opening her mouth for more as soon as she swallowed. "Is it yummy?" Derek asked her.

"Mmm," Lilly smiled.

"So, what did you want to do tonight? Izzie's been begging to watch Lilly for weeks, so if you wanted to, you and I could go out somewhere. We could be home before the Yankees-Seahawks pre-season game thing comes on, and you could open your gifts," Meredith suggested.

Derek broke off a piece of his sandwich and tossed it to Charlie. "Sure, sounds good," he said. "How about it, Lilly? Want to spend some time with Aunt Izzie tonight?"

"Zee," Lilly echoed, happily accepting the Cheerio Meredith handed her.

"Okay. I'll call her and let her know you're on board with that, peanut," Meredith said. She smiled when Lilly took a break from her lunch to continue picking the clustering of flowers at the edge of the blanket, her tiny hands gripping the stems before pulling them out with gusto. "Remember when we came out here the morning after you first showed me the land?"

"Hmm, yeah. I think we sat right around here, actually. Did we sleep at all the night before?" Derek chuckled.

"Maybe a catnap or two between the many rounds of trailer-rocking sex," Meredith recalled, shuffling over on the blanket to lean into him. "And I wanted to see the mist rise off the water at sunrise."

Derek wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I remember. We gathered up the blankets off the bed, and trekked out here."

"And we split a cinnamon raisin bagel and that travel mug of coffee," Meredith added.

"God, I can't believe that was almost six years ago."

"I know," Meredith said. She put her hand on her cheek and kissed him. "I loved you way before that night."

"I loved you, too."

Lilly crawled back to them with a small bouquet of flowers squished in her hand, and she dropped them on the blanket. "Mama Da," she offered, wiggling her way between the two of them.

"More flowers? How did we get lucky enough to make the cutest, most generous baby there is?" Derek asked.

"I love how she squishes our names together, like we're one person," Meredith giggled, cleaning off Lilly's hands with a wipe. "Lilly, where's Mama Da?"

Lilly pointed to both of them and smiled. "Mama Da," she said simply before turning her attention to the Cheerio Derek gave her. "Duds?"

"I think the duckies went home, Lilly," Meredith told her. "Do you want to take a walk down to the water, so you can splash your toes?" she asked, tickling the sole of Lilly's bare foot.

Lilly shrieked with laughter as she pulled her foot away, then tried to stand up on her own, only to land with a soft thud onto her bottom. "Almost got it. A little more practice," Derek said.

He and Meredith each took one of Lilly's hands and helped her stand up. Once she found her footing, she started toddling toward the water, her parents walking on either side of her. "Seriously, who needs the beach when we've got all this to ourselves?" Meredith said.

"Lilly's a fan," Derek said, their daughter fascinated by the feel of the squishy, sandy mud between her toes as they reached the water.

Meredith gasped slightly when the water rose an inch or two over their feet, and she stepped back. "Ooh. Cold!"

"Clearly, you've never been fly fishing in November," Derek teased her, unfazed by the temperature. Lilly fussed when the water hit her feet, and her lower lip pouted out, always a sign of pending crying. Before it escalated, Derek quickly scooped her up and held her in his arm. "You, too? I need to take both of you fly fishing."

"Not a chance."

"Oh, come on. It's way more fun than fishing off the dock," Derek said.

"Yeah, but we can have sex on the dock," she pointed out. "Can't have sex in rubber suspenders in the middle of a lake."

"Are you mocking my rubber suspenders?"

"Yes. But I admit, you still look hot in them, so I can deal with it."

"Hmm, I don't know what you got me for my birthday, but I think Lilly and I know what to get for yours," Derek hinted.

Meredith laughed, fixing Lilly's sunglasses. "Derek Shepherd, don't you dare get me a pair of those things."

...

Izzie bounced Lilly on her hip as she rummaged through Meredith and Derek's kitchen cabinets in search of baking supplies. She thought she may have hit the jackpot when she discovered the cookie jar from the old house, and she took it from the shelf.

"Let's see what we've got," Izzie said, taking off the lid. She peered inside, and all she could do was roll her eyes. "Seriously, they still stock condoms in this thing?"

"Hey," Meredith said as she entered the kitchen with a bath towel and a pair of Lilly's pajamas. She noticed the open cookie jar on the counter and a blush came over her cheeks. "Oops, forgot about those."

"You've still got the glow-in-the-dark ones? When's the last time you looked in here?" Izzie asked in amusement, taking one out.

Meredith set the towel and pajamas on the counter next to the cookie jar, jogging her memory for the last kitchen quickie that would have required a condom from their stash. "Um... we haven't even used condoms in almost two years, so they're at least that old," she said.

Lilly took the condom packet from Izzie and flipped it from front to back in curiosity, just as Derek walked into the kitchen, and he froze in his tracks. "Why is my daughter holding a condom?" he asked.

"I think she likes the neon green wrapper," Meredith said. "Wait, were you going to bake something? Is that why all the cabinet doors are open?"

"I don't see a birthday cake for Derek, so I figured while you two went out, Lilly and I could make one," Izzie explained.

"You don't have to do that, Iz. Lilly's too young for cake anyway, so Derek and I were just planning to split a dessert at whatever restaurant we go to," Meredith replied, gently prying the condom out of Lilly's hand.

"Well, then you can eat it during the week. I already promised Lilly a baking lesson. Besides, now you can sing to him," Izzie upheld.

"Fine, go for it," Meredith said in resignation. "Okay, so here's Lilly's bath stuff. You don't have to give her a bath, but if you get bored or if she gets fussy, it usually does the trick. Oh, and she's a pretty fast crawler, so if you turn your back for five seconds, there's a very good chance she's already in another room. She cruises the furniture, too."

"Diapers are in the bin under the end table. Bottles get heated for twenty seconds. She likes to eat Cheerios when she watches _Doc McStuffins_. Got it," Izzie finished for her, kissing the baby's chubby cheek. "Tell your parents to go have fun."

"Okay, okay. We're leaving," Meredith promised as she stole Lilly away for a goodbye kiss.

"Thanks again, Stevens. We really appreciate this," Derek said sincerely as they walked into the living room toward the foyer.

"It's no problem. Alex is on call tonight anyway, so there's nothing more I'd rather do than hang out with my Lilly. Just go out and have a good time. Joe's, a fancy restaurant; hell, go back to the old house and have some sex, if that floats your boat," Izzie shrugged. "Oh, but if you do, just don't do it in my bed, because that would be weird."

Meredith laughed, handing Lilly to Derek, so he could give her a kiss, too. "Okay, you got it," she played along.

"We love you. See you in a little while, Lillybug," Derek said before kissing Lilly's forehead and handing her back to Izzie.

"Can you wave bye-bye?" Izzie asked.

"She can do you one better. Lilly, blow kisses," Meredith said, doing it first, so Lilly would mimic her.

Lilly sloppily kissed her palm, then outstretched her arm like they taught her. "Muah!" she returned, smiling at both her parents.

"Jeez, smart cookie," Izzie praised her.

"She's a genius," Meredith agreed as she opened the front door. "Oh, and speaking of cookies, you know how there were condoms in the jar? I think there's some in the end table drawer, too. So, you know, you may not want to open it."

"Thanks for the heads up," Izzie said. "Take your time, and have fun."

"Okay. Bye, Princess. Be good," Derek waved, closing the door behind him after he and Meredith walked outside. "A few rare hours to ourselves. Where do you wanna go?"

Meredith shrugged, slipping into the passenger seat of the car. "Doesn't matter to me," she said. "Joe's?"

"The game's coming on in a few hours. It'll probably be crowded," Derek said, both of them pulling on their seat belts. He put the key into the ignition and started backing out of the driveway. "Canto?"

"No reservation."

"Oh. Forgot about that. Uh... IHOP?" he suggested. Meredith glanced over at him with raised eyebrows, and he laughed. "I'm kidding," he said. "We should just go to a hotel. Order up room service, have some sex."

"Or..."

"Or?" Derek echoed.

"Or we could take Iz up on her offer," Meredith said, smiling when Derek raised his eyebrows at her this time. "What?"

"You're serious?" he asked.

Meredith shrugged. "Why not? It's like a hotel, only it's free, and the food is better."

"Well, when you put it like that," Derek agreed. "Do you still have the key?"

"Yep." Meredith pulled her keys from her bag and reached for the one that opened the front door of the old house. "So, what do you say? Wanna go have some hot sex?"

Derek grinned as they finally drove off their land, and he started heading in the direction of the house where they once lived. "This birthday just keeps getting better."

It didn't take long before they arrived at Alex and Izzie's house, and within thirty seconds of entering through the front door, Meredith was already kicking off her boots. Derek watched in amusement as she began to unzip her jeans. "Wow. Not wasting any time, huh?"

"Nope. Get naked."

He put his hands on her ass and easily picked her up. "Let's at least move away from the full glass door, then."

"Good thinking," Meredith said, wrapping her legs around his waist before kissing him. "This seems slightly familiar."

"Hmm, what?" he murmured against her lips.

"You carrying me into the living room, having more orgasms than I can count, and me waking up naked on the couch the next morning before I kicked you out," she said, her hands nimbly working to undo the buttons on his shirt. "Don't worry. I won't kick you out this time."

"I'd hope not, since we don't even live here anymore," Derek smirked, setting her on the couch.

"True." Meredith flung her shirt off to the side, then shook out the blanket draped over the back of the couch. She smoothed it out on the floor and dropped some pillows on top. "There. Not as good as a mattress, but it'll do."

Derek laughed, tossing his shirt next to hers. "You're sure Stevens was serious about this, right?" he said, though any fleeting worry he had was derailed completely when Meredith reached around and unhooked her bra.

"Even if she wasn't, would you want to stop?" Meredith asked as she shimmied out of her jeans and panties at the same time.

Derek tracked her body from head to toe, his smile growing when she pulled him down onto the floor next to her. "No," he answered.

"Good. Me either," she said, both of them working as fast as they could to remove the bottom half of his clothing. When he was finally naked, too, she pulled him on top of her.

Meredith gripped the blanket beneath her when she felt him push inside her. "Derek!" she gasped.

"Damn it. Meredith," he sighed, the feel of her enough to send shivers through him. He leaned down and nibbled at the skin on her neck, a secret spot he'd found years ago, one that drove her crazy every time.

She smiled at the tickle of his stubble on her skin combined with the feeling of him inside her, igniting every nerve ending she had. "Hmm, Derek."

"Harder?" he asked, not waiting for her to respond because he already knew the answer.

Meredith cupped his cheeks in her hands to kiss him. "Mmm, yes," she moaned. She clenched around him, retaliating with something she knew drove him crazy.

Derek groaned deep in his throat, her muscles gripping him so hard he could barely move. "Evil," he choked out.

Meredith wrapped her legs around his waist to pull him even deeper inside her. "I happen to think giving you lots of dirty sex is very, very nice."

"Hmm, how's this for nice?" Derek said, slipping his hand between them to rub her with the pad of his thumb.

Her toes curled in pleasure and she arched her back. "Ahh!" she hissed. "Keep doing that."

When she released her hold on him, Derek started pistoning in and out, and Meredith held onto his shoulders for leverage. They still had plenty of time for long and languid later in their own bed, because once they picked up the rhythm, slowing down was almost an impossibility. They continued for as long as they could hold on, their breaths becoming more rapid with each passing minute.

"Close?" he asked, kissing her clavicle, his lips moving to her breasts.

"Very," Meredith moaned.

All it took was one thrust, and she was a goner. She tugged her fingers through his hair, riding out wave after wave of her orgasm. The sensation of her spasming around him was more than Derek could handle, and he buried his face in her neck as he felt his own release rocketing through him.

For minutes afterward, they laid there in silence as they recovered. Memories of their first night together made Meredith smile, and she ran her fingers through his hair. "Even after all these years, living room floor sex never gets old."

Derek laughed, the vibration of the sound tickling her chest. "Sex with you never gets old, no matter where it is," he said. He wrapped his arms under her shoulders, pulling her on top of him. "This really is the best birthday ever."

"Good," she whispered, rocking her hips back and forth, ready for round two.

Derek felt himself begin to harden as she moved above him. "Wanna go again?" he asked.

"I suppose so," Meredith said nonchalantly, reaching behind her and gently tugging, which was ranked in the top five on his list of favorite things. "But only if you make me pancakes after."

He blinked up at the ceiling as he tried to comprehend what she'd just said, his mind only able to focus on what her hand was currently doing to him. "I... what?"

"Pancakes," she repeated, giggling at the blank look he gave her. "Ever since you mentioned IHOP, I could really go for some."

"Huh? Oh, pancakes. Yeah," Derek sputtered. At this point, he'd fly her to freaking Paris for dinner if that's what she wanted, anything to relieve the ache zinging through him.

Meredith decided to stop teasing and she sank down on top of him, smiling coyly in satisfaction at the look of bliss that came over his face. "Just so you know, I expect sneaky, dirty sex on my birthday."

"Yes, dear."


	145. A Weekend Apart

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. But I did sneak in a line from the show toward the end of the chapter, because I couldn't help myself. ;)  
**

**Thank you a thousand times for your patience. It means everything!**

With the upcoming boards two months away, Meredith knew she needed to spend every available minute studying. For any other fifth year resident, making time for index cards and textbooks was easy; but as the only resident with a ten month old baby, parceling out time was a challenge. And with Derek leaving for the weekend to speak at a conference in Portland, she knew the chances of her fitting in some much needed study time were slim to none.

"I wish you were old enough to read, so you could quiz me on this stuff," Meredith told Lilly, who sat in her high chair. She spooned some baby cereal into Lilly's mouth, but she spit it back out, turning her head in disinterest. "Not hungry? You love your cereal."

"Ma," Lilly pouted, holding her arms out.

Meredith set the green bowl and spoon on the counter next to her file of case studies, then picked her up, and Lilly clung immediately to her shirt. "Do you feel sick?" she asked, feeling the baby's forehead.

"Hey. I just got off the phone with Mark. He'll be here in ten minutes to pick me up," Derek said as he entered the kitchen, frowning when he saw Lilly. "She okay?"

"She feels a little warm. She's probably just teething," Meredith shrugged, so he wouldn't worry right before he had to leave.

"I'll get the thermometer. I think it's in her bin in the living room," Derek said.

Meredith smiled at him. "Thank you," she replied, glancing down at Lilly. "I'm sorry you don't feel good, Lillybug."

"Mama," Lilly mumbled, her face buried in Meredith's chest.

"I know," Meredith soothed her. "How about I feed you?"

"Got it," Derek said as he reentered the kitchen with the thermometer. He walked over to the two of them and turned it on, then gently eased the tip into Lilly's ear. Lilly fussed at the interruption, but held still long enough for the thermometer to get a reading. When it beeped, Derek took it out and read the result screen. "99.4. Enough to feel crummy, but not too bad. A little acetaminophen will knock it right out."

"I hope so. I'll let her nurse, then I'll give her some. What do I do? Should I call out of work?" she asked, heading toward the living room, so she could nurse Lilly on the couch.

"What do you have scheduled for today?"

Meredith handed Lilly to Derek after they sat down, and began unbuttoning her shirt. "I have a solo shunt placement scheduled at one. It's non-emergent, so I could always bump it, but it's Friday. I don't want to make the guy wait until Monday," she said.

"Lexie won't mind if she has a fever. She'll still watch her if you wanted to go in," Derek encouraged, handing Lilly back to Meredith once she was settled.

"I know. It's just that Lilly prefers us when she doesn't feel good," Meredith said. She held Lilly to her breast, and Lilly latched on with ease, letting her eyelids slip closed. "There you go, peanut," she cooed. "Lex may have boobs, but hers can't do what mine can."

Derek smiled as he took the blanket from the back of the couch. "Those things are magic," he said, draping it over Meredith and Lilly. "Want me to give Weller a call? If he has time, I'm sure he'd do it for you."

"Crap. I don't know," Meredith sighed.

"I'm sorry. If it wasn't too late to cancel, I would," Derek said, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Meredith patted his thigh and shook her head. "No, I want you to go. You and Mark worked hard on the presentation. Lilly and I can rough it without you for two days," she said in support.

"Hmm, okay. As long as you promise not to start walking while I'm gone," Derek told Lilly, who peacefully nursed with her tiny hand resting on top of Meredith's breast.

"I'll make sure she doesn't," Meredith promised, pulling her phone from her pocket when she felt it vibrating. "Lexie," she said before answering. "Hello?"

Derek watched Meredith's face dissolve into a frown as Lexie spoke, although he couldn't make out what she said. Meredith smoothed her fingers through Lilly's hair, finally able to get in a few words when there was a pause in Lexie's rambling, something they both inherited in their shared DNA.

"Lex, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Trust me, I don't expect you to babysit with a stomach bug," Meredith said in sympathy. "Lilly's feeling under the weather, too. Besides, now I have an excuse to take off from work to study," Meredith said. "Yes, I'm sure. Just take it easy... Okay, I will. Hope you feel better. Bye."

"Sick, too, huh?" Derek said after Meredith ended the call.

"Yeah. I think she apologized thirty times in two minutes," Meredith couldn't help but laugh. "Do you have Weller's number? I feel bad passing off a solo surgery, but if Lilly's sick, I can't leave her."

Derek kissed her cheek, then got up from the couch. "I'll call him for you. I wanted to let Charlie out before I left, anyway," he offered.

"Thanks. And tell him I said thank you," Meredith said. She curled her legs up onto the couch and smiled down at Lilly, who peeked her eyes open. "Looks like we get to have Mommy-Lilly time today. How's that sound?" she asked, brushing her finger over Lilly's cheek.

Lilly yawned into Meredith's breast and continued to nurse, content to be in her mom's arms. Her blue eyes flashed open again when she heard the doorbell ring seconds later, so rather than disturb her by standing up, Meredith solved it the easy way.

"Come in!" she called out, draping the edge of the blanket over her shoulder to shield herself.

The front door opened in the foyer, followed by Mark's footsteps as he walked into the living room. "Hey," he greeted, stopping when he saw that Meredith was nursing. "Oh. This is awkward. Want me to wait over there?"

"You've walked in on me nursing, like, three times now. It doesn't faze me anymore. Besides, my boob is covered, don't worry. You can sit," she assured him. "Derek's ready. He's just calling Weller to see if he can cover for me today."

"Everything okay?" Mark asked, dropping down onto the adjacent couch.

"Yeah. Lilly's got a fever, so I want to stay home with her," Meredith explained, rubbing small circles over Lilly's back with her hand. "So, all ready for your big presentation on neurovascular rewiring and cranial reconstruction?"

"Yeah. We're gonna be the VIP dream team at this thing. I just wish they weren't making us share a suite at the hotel. Kinda puts the kibosh on having phone sex with Bridg," Mark joked.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "If it makes you feel any better, your presence blocks phone sex between Derek and me, too," she said. "But Lilly and I are going to FaceTime him, so you're welcome to join in on that."

"Looking forward to it."

Charlie trotted into the living room with a new bone, Derek following close behind. "Hey. Weller said he'd push some stuff around to fit in the shunt placement. Said he's happy to do it, so don't feel bad."

Meredith let out a sigh of relief, dropping her head on the back of the couch. "Good. That's good. Thank you for calling," she said as she felt Lilly unlatch. "All finished, peanut?"

"I'll take her. I need as much Lilly time as I can get in the next five minutes," Derek said, taking Lilly from Meredith so she could re-button her shirt.

Lilly snuggled into his chest and smiled slightly, making Derek feel even more guilty about the prospect of being away from her for two days. "Dada," she yawned, closing her eyes once again as she settled.

"Dada's gonna miss you so much," Derek said, patting her back lightly as he burped her.

Mark laughed at the exchange. "You'll be three hours away for two days. You're not jetting off for a year-long Arctic expedition," he said.

"Just you wait. Even being away from your kid for an eight hour shift is hard," Derek refuted.

"It's true. And being on call is even worse," Meredith said, smoothing out the front of her shirt. "My boob is no longer in plain view, Mark. You can let go of the pillow shield."

"Thank you." Mark dropped the pillow he'd been holding onto the couch, then glanced at his watch. "Almost ready to go? I want to beat traffic getting down there."

"Yeah," Derek said as stood up. He kissed the top of Lilly's head, breathing in her curls that smelled like her shampoo. "How about we leave Uncle Mark here, so you can come to Portland with me instead? Wouldn't that be fun?"

"Don't let Mark drive too fast," Meredith said.

"If anyone drives too fast, it's your husband," Mark replied, tossing a stuffed turtle back in forth in his hands. "I swear, he was a race car driver in a past life."

Meredith tried to come up with a valid argument, but knew it was futile, mostly because Mark was right. "Well then, if you take turns driving, don't let Derek drive too fast," she said.

She smoothed her hands over the shoulders of Derek's shirt, then leaned in to kiss him. It was the kind of kiss they normally wouldn't have in front of anyone, let alone Mark, but because it was the last kiss they would have for the next three days, Meredith wanted to make it count. Her fingers snaked through his hair until they landed at the curls on the nape of his neck, and she could feel his skin prickle with goosebumps at her touch. Mindful that Lilly was still sandwiched between them, they made themselves pull back after a few moments, regaining composure as best they could.

"I'm surprised you didn't tear each other's clothes off just now. Want me to watch Lilly while you guys bang it out real quick?" Mark cut in.

Meredith used her thumb to wipe off the pink tinted lip balm she'd gotten on Derek's face, and she shook her head. "No, we're good. We banged it out last night. Twice," she disclosed, choosing to roll with Mark's commentary than let herself be embarrassed by it. "Okay, love you. Have fun. You'll do great."

"I love you, too. I'll call when we get there," Derek said. He hugged Lilly one last time and planted a kiss on her forehead before regretfully handing her back to Meredith. "I love you, Princess. Have a fun weekend with Mommy, okay?"

"Oh, we have big things planned. Studying, napping, laundry, maybe some trashy TV. You're missing out," she teased.

"Sounds like it," Derek chuckled, putting his hand on her back as they walked into the foyer. He shrugged on his coat and pulled up the handle on his travel suitcase, wishing more than anything he could just unpack the thing and spend the weekend with his two favorite people. "All set. Bye bye, Lilly," he said, blowing her a kiss.

Despite feeling crummy from her fever, Lilly still perked up enough to blow Derek a kiss back and smile at him. "Ba, Dada," she said in her tiny voice.

"I love you, baby," he waved.

"Hope you feel better, Lilly. See you, Grey," Mark said as he pushed the front door open.

"Bye," Meredith returned, tugging on Derek's coat sleeve just as he was about to follow Mark out the door. She pressed a lingering kiss to his lips and smiled. "That was for good luck."

"Hmm, maybe we should've taken Mark up on his offer for a quickie..."

...

Lilly lay snoozing on Meredith's chest, finally able to get some rest after the acetaminophen kicked in and started to break her fever. And Meredith took advantage of the quiet time by studying the piles of case scenarios Derek had given her. There were hundreds of them written on large index cards, the same cards Derek had used to prep for his boards way back when. Meredith marveled at the meticulous detail of each one, complete with color coding, divided into brain lobes, spine levels, nerves, vasculatures, and everything in between.

Once she finished reviewing a case study on an occipital lobe tumor, Meredith placed it at the back of the pile and smiled. "I've probably mentioned this to you before, but your Daddy is my hero, Lilly," she said in a hushed tone.

Meredith's phone buzzed on her nightstand as a call came through, and she quickly answered it when she saw that it was Derek. "Hey," she whispered.

"Hey. We just got here, so I wanted to call. How are you guys doing?" Derek asked.

"We're good. Lilly's been sleeping practically since you left, so I've just been studying. Your study cards are amazing, by the way. You could mass produce these things and make us millionaires," Meredith said, trailing her fingers over Lilly's back.

"Well, good. I'm glad they're helpful. Not that you need the help. You spent your childhood in OR galleries with surgical textbooks in your lap. You've technically been prepping for your boards since you learned how to read," he said truthfully.

"These cards are better than any textbook. Seriously, in addition to 'welcome home' sex, you're getting 'thank you for the study cards' sex, too," she said.

Derek smirked on the other line. "Really?"

"Really," Meredith echoed. "So, did you guys check in yet?"

"Yeah. The receptionist almost gave us the key to the honeymoon suite by accident, because Mark wrote down the wrong room number. Thankfully, we got it fixed, so we don't have to share a bed for the next two nights," Derek said, the relief evident in his voice.

"Hey, I'm an excellent spooner. Your loss," Mark chimed in from across the room.

"Really bad images in my head right now," Meredith laughed.

"Mine, too. Okay, I'll let you get back to studying. Just wanted to check in. Give Lilly a kiss for me."

Meredith leaned down and kissed the top of Lilly's head lightly. "From Daddy to me to you, peanut."

"Thank you," Derek smiled. "Love you guys. I'll give you a call later on."

"Love you, too. Bye," Meredith said, dropping her phone onto the bed next to her after she hung up. As she went to take the next index card off the deck, her phone buzzed again. She read the display, bracing herself before she even answered. "Nurses' station," she sighed. "Hello?"

"Hi, Dr. Grey. This is Sam, one of the nurses on four. I know you called out today, but Dr. Halloran just did a crash C-section on a thirty-four weeker. The baby's stats kept dropping, and during delivery, she stroked out. The IR team threaded a catheter and busted the clot with tPA. Now there's evidence of a clot in her spine, too. IR located it, but they can't get it with the cath," Sam explained.

Meredith felt her heart rate pick up before she even asked the question. "You want _me_ to evacuate the clot?"

"Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Nelson are at the conference. Weller's been in back to back surgeries the whole day. Halloran suggested you," Sam said.

Meredith glanced down at Lilly sleeping on her chest, and any lingering trepidation she had washed away. She would want a surgeon with her ability to help Lilly if the situation were reversed, and she knew she had an obligation to do everything in her power to try.

"I'll do it. Just keep her stable. I'll be there as soon as I can," Meredith said, ending the call and dialing Derek back. She tucked her phone between her ear and her shoulder as she gently laid Lilly down in the center of the bed, then swung her legs over the side so she could start getting ready.

"Hey. Everything okay?" Derek asked as soon as he picked up.

"That depends," Meredith said, shimmying out of her pajama pants in exchange for her jeans. "How fast can you walk me through a spinal clot evacuation on a preemie?"

...

Meredith stood at the OR board as she tried to settle Lilly, who was still in her cat pajamas, displeased after being woken up from her nap. And Meredith was about five seconds away from joining her daughter in her crying fit when she saw that all of her friends were in surgery, leaving her stranded for a temporary babysitter.

Onlookers glanced in her direction when they heard Lilly crying, and Meredith stared back, daring them to make a comment and suffer her wrath. She wracked her brain for options, but fell short at every turn. The hospital daycare was surely booked by now. Even if it weren't, Lilly had a fever, which made her persona non grata. And she wasn't registered anyway, so if by some slim chance there was a spot, by the time Meredith filled out the mountain of paperwork, there would be no surgery to get to, because the preemie that needed her couldn't wait that long.

"Crap. Crap. Crap. What do we do, Lilly?" Meredith said, bouncing nervously on her heels.

"What are you doing?" came Bailey's voice beside her.

"I have an emergency surgery on a preemie, and Derek is out of town. Lilly's got a fever, so daycare is out. And everyone is scrubbed in somewhere," Meredith said, willing herself not to breakdown in front of her former resident. But despite her best efforts, she broke.

"Grey, are you crying?" Bailey asked.

"No," Meredith lied, the shake of her head morphing into a nod. "Yes. Sorry. I just don't know what to do. The baby could stroke out any minute, and I need to get to the OR. But I've just been standing here like an idiot while people give me dirty looks because Lilly is screaming, and I can't get her to calm down."

"Oh, sweetie. Give her to me," Bailey said in sympathy, taking the diaper bag off Meredith's shoulder before she reached for Lilly.

"What?"

Bailey managed to gently pull Lilly's grip from Meredith's shirt, then held her close to her chest. "Hey, pretty girl. That's it. There we go," she cooed.

"You really don't have to. I know you're busy, and I**—**" Meredith said before Bailey interrupted what was sure to be another ramble.

"I just spent the last six hours teaching in the skills lab. I need a stress reliever. And since I can't drink on the job, this baby's the next best thing. Smarter than those idiot interns, too. Isn't that right?" Bailey smiled, patting Lilly diapered bottom gently with her hand.

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked.

"Yes, I'm sure. Now, go. Call me when you're done, and I'll come find you," Bailey said.

"Mama!" Lilly cried, holding out her arms toward Meredith.

Meredith's eyes burned with guilt, her heart breaking in two at how upset Lilly was. The same thing had happened to her countless times as a child, and she felt like a horrible mother for repeating history. She squeezed Lilly's hand and kissed her rosy cheek, wet with tears.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, okay? You just have fun with Bailey for a little while," Meredith said softly, smiling as best she could as she wiped the tears off Lilly's face with her thumb.

Lilly quieted slightly at her mom's calm voice and touch, relaxing in Bailey's arm, and Meredith sighed in relief. "That's my girl. Mommy loves you, Lilly," she said. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

Before she could talk herself out of it, Meredith turned around and forced her feet to walk toward the OR where the baby was already being prepped. As she made her way down the hall, she recited the steps to the surgery that Derek had spent a half hour coaching her through, not because she was scared she would mess up, but to distract her mind from the image of her daughter in tears. When she reached the door to the scrub room, her phone signaled a text from Derek and she pulled it from her pocket.

_Can't wait to hear all about your victory tonight. Go kick some neuro ass. _

Meredith smiled as she sent back a quick _thank you_. Even three hours away, it still felt like he was standing beside her, cheering her on like he had been since day one. She made a mental note to give him sex for that, too, when he came home.

...

Long, tedious hours passed in the OR, hours spent working around the tiniest spine Meredith had ever seen in her five years as a surgeon. But she did it. And the adrenaline rush that came over her when she walked out of the OR made trekking out to the hospital with her sick baby on a day off totally worth it. She considered calling Derek, but decided against it because she wanted to see the look on his face rather than just picture it over the phone.

After speaking with the newborn's family, and subsequently getting hugged by every grateful family member, Meredith quickly got changed in the resident lounge, anxious to see her daughter. Bailey left her a message saying she and Lilly were in the attending lounge, and even before Meredith turned the handle, she braced herself for the potential screaming and crying on the other side.

But when she opened the door, the only thing she witnessed was a quiet calm. Lilly sat on Bailey's lap, listening intensely as Bailey read her _Green Eggs and Ham_.

"I do not like them with a mouse. I do not like them here or there. I do not like them anywhere! I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-am," Bailey recited with enthusiasm.

Lilly noticed Meredith before Bailey did, and her eyes lit up when she saw her. "Mama!" she said in delight.

"Hi, baby girl. You look like you're feeling better," Meredith said, sitting next to them on the couch.

"Her fever broke about an hour ago. She took a nap for a while, and when she woke up, we watched an appy from the gallery while she ate, then she had a diaper change. Then we came back here and read a few dozen books," Bailey said.

"Nana, Mama," Lilly added, showing Meredith the piece of frozen banana in her hand.

"Ooh, you have a banana, too? Is it yummy?" Meredith asked.

Lilly smiled as she went back to sucking on it. "Mmm," she hummed happily.

"Thank you for watching her. The surgery took longer than I expected. I feel bad making you wait around," Meredith said.

Bailey shook her head. "Hush. She was no problem. It's been ages since I've spent time with a baby that I wasn't operating on, and yours happens to be as close to perfect as they come."

"I know," Meredith bragged, her tone playful.

"So, how'd your surgery go?"

"Good. I got the clot out with no complications," Meredith said. "She'll have to spend some time in the NICU until she gains more weight, but I don't think she'll have any lasting effects from the stroke."

"And you did it by yourself. You should be proud," Bailey said sincerely.

"I know Derek's in Portland, but I swear it's like he was whispering instructions in my ear the whole time. Sounds crazy, but it's actually helpful," Meredith said.

"Don't tell him that. His ego's already too big for his own good," Bailey joked as she combed her fingers through Lilly's curls, the small gesture making Meredith smile. "Really though, Grey, to have a solo, successful spinal clot evacuation on your record, and on a preemie no less? Your board proctors could pass you on that alone."

"I wish."

"Not easy trying to study with a little one at home," Bailey empathized.

"Nope. It's not. If it weren't for Derek, I really don't know what I'd do. He's been so great about making sure I have time, even if it's just running errands with Lilly on the weekends, so I have a few hours to study," Meredith said, rolling her eyes at herself. "He's been gone for less than twelve hours, and I miss him. Does that make me a sappy, crazy wife?"

"Hey, I'd miss the hair, too," Bailey admitted.

"I _do_ miss the hair," Meredith sighed. "Okay, ready to go home, Lilly, so we can chat with Dada?"

"Dada!" Lilly cheered.

Meredith reached for her daughter, who was covered in banana. "How about a bath first, then Dada?"

Lilly licked some of the mushy, yellow fruit off her hands and laughed when her fingers stuck together. "Dada!" she repeated.

Meredith smiled at Bailey. "I don't know what kind of magic you worked in these last few hours to make the fever disappear, and replace it with my happy, giddy baby again, but I owe you one."

...

Lilly sat snuggled in Meredith's lap, freshly bathed and wearing her Minnie Mouse pajamas. She watched curiously as Meredith pressed buttons on the screen sitting in front of them, her lips forming a tiny 'o' shape when Derek's face appeared.

"Dada!" she gasped.

"Hey, Lillybug!" Derek said from the iPad screen.

Lilly looked up at Meredith and smiled. "Dada!" she told her, wiggling her bottom in excitement.

"Yeah, I see him," Meredith laughed. "In case you can't tell, she's very pumped about all this. She talked about Dada the whole way home, and in the tub, and during dinner."

"Daddy misses you, Lilly. A swanky Portland hotel room is no fun if you guys aren't here with me," he said.

"Sorry I make terrible company," Mark called out from his own bed next to Derek's.

Derek laughed. "That's not what I meant," he said, turning the iPad toward Mark. "Here, say hi."

Mark waved at Meredith and Lilly on the screen, grinning when Lilly waved back at him. "Hey, beautiful! Looks like you're feeling better."

"Oh, she is. Bailey watched her during my surgery, and when I picked her up, she was totally fine," Meredith said.

"Good. I've been worried about her all day," Derek said in relief. "So, how'd the surgery go? I want to know every detail, from start to finish."

Meredith shifted more comfortably in bed, settling in to tell him all about it. "Okay, so before I even opened her up, I looked at the CT scans. And Derek, this clot was huge. It would've been big in an adult, but her spine was tiny. Her vertebrae were smaller than my fingertip. Anyway, I couldn't even visualize the margins until I made the cut. After I got the retractor in there, I saw that the clot was compressing T-9 through L-2..." Meredith began.

Derek listened in awe as she told the whole story, living out the same adrenaline rush vicariously through her. He was genuinely proud both as her husband and her teacher, and seeing her eyes light up as she spoke made him fall even more in love with her. By the time she'd finished nearly an hour later, he wished more than ever that he was home, so they could celebrate the best way they knew how. But for now, being able to share in her excitement would have to do.

"Oh, the best part is, the surgery got recorded, and I stole the DVD, so we could watch it once you get home," she said as she trailed her fingers down Lilly's back, who had since fallen asleep on her chest.

"I could marry you again right now. You're so hot when you're nefarious," Derek grinned.

"Me being a nefarious, badass neuro god turns you on?" Meredith asked.

"If I were home right now, I'd be tearing your clothes off with my teeth."

Mark paused the game of Angry Birds he'd been playing on his phone, and glanced over at Derek. "Just a friendly reminder that I'm sitting a foot away from you, so if this is leading to dirty video chat sex, give me some warning, so I can leave."

"There will be no dirty video chat sex," Meredith answered from the screen. "Well, not tonight, anyway. Tomorrow after Derek tells me about the presentation, all bets are off. Oh, and just wait until Sunday night for the 'welcome home' sex you're going to have," Meredith hinted, raising her eyebrows at him.

Derek laughed. "I'm already counting down the minutes."


	146. Lilly's First Easter

**Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.**

**I suck, I know. Blame nursing school! But I'm almost through my first year, so once summer break comes, the updates should be more frequent. Endless thanks for putting up with me!**

It was a sunny Sunday morning in April, and Lilly's first Easter. She sat on the living room floor in her Peep pajamas, mapping out her path to all the not-so-hidden eggs scattered around her. A blue one caught her eye, and she quickly crawled over to it, holding it victoriously in the air after she picked it up.

"Wow, she means business. Good job, Lilly!" Meredith said proudly, she and Derek sitting on the floor beside her.

"Gigi, Ma!" Lilly showed her, an excited smile on her face.

"I know; you're so smart. You already found the first gigi!" Meredith said as she kissed Lilly's forehead.

"Gigi. Is that 'egg' in Lilly talk?" Derek asked.

Lilly handed him the plastic, blue egg. "Gigi, Dada," she clarified for him, before crawling off in search of another.

"Well, I guess that answers my question," Derek chuckled, setting the egg in Lilly's pink Easter basket. "She really is a genius. That Grey-Shepherd DNA is powerful stuff."

"Right?"

"And only a few months until we start trying for her prodigy sibling," he said.

Meredith put her hand on his cheek and kissed him. "I can't wait."

"Me either," Derek murmured against her lips.

Lilly plucked a green egg out of her diaper bin that was sitting across the room, glancing over at both of them "Gigi!" she announced again.

Her parents pulled away from the kiss, both of them clapping for her in encouragement. "You found another one! Can you put it in your basket?" Derek said, setting it between himself and Meredith.

They waited for her to crawl back over to them, but she had other plans. Instead of positioning herself on her hands and knees, she raised her bottom off the floor, and steadied herself on her tiny feet, the green egg still in her hand. Meredith and Derek watched as she stood all on her own, dumbfounded for a few moments before Meredith snapped into action.

"Holy crap, she's gonna walk," Meredith whispered, scrabbling for her phone on the coffee table.

"That's it, Lilly," Derek cheered her on softly, careful not to disturb her as she got a feel for the floor beneath her.

Meredith hit the record button on her phone just as Lilly moved her left foot forward, making sure she had good balance before moving her right. Once she found her pattern, she continued on toward Derek, picking up momentum with each little step.

"Oh my God, Lilly," Meredith said in awe, her eyes already blurring over with tears as she watched Lilly walk on her own for the first time.

"You can do it. Come to Daddy," Derek said encouragingly, holding his arms out toward her.

Lilly slowly conquered the six feet of space that stood between her and her parents, and when she made it over to Derek, the proud smile on her face was enough to melt both of their hearts.

"Lilly, you did it! You walked!" Meredith cheered, watching Derek as he pressed kisses all over Lilly's cheeks. "I can't believe she just did that."

"She wanted to surprise us, right?" Derek said.

Meredith hugged Lilly tight when Derek passed her over, and got in a sprinkling of her own kisses. "That was so good, Lilly. You made me cry," she said, smoothing her fingers through Lilly's hair. "Last Easter, I spent most of the day vegging out on the couch eating Peeps while you tap-danced in my belly. Probably from the sugar high we were both on. Now you're walking like a big girl."

"I can't wait to send that to my mom and sisters. They're still obsessing over the pictures we sent of Lilly with the Easter bunny. A video of her walking in the same week? We'll probably hear the squeals of joy all the way on the East coast," Derek joked, forwarding the video to his phone.

Lilly leaned over Meredith's lap and dropped her egg into her basket, then clapped for herself in delight. "Gigi, Ma," she said.

Meredith laughed. "Well, she's very impressive."

"You need to show Aunt Lexie and everyone when we see them today," Derek said. "They're still coming over, right?"

"Yeah. I talked to Lexie last night. She said my dad can't wait to see Lilly. He made a whole gift basket for her," Meredith said.

"Good. I'm sure he's looking forward to seeing you, too. It's been a while."

"What? Sorry, I'm trying to listen. She's just blowing my mind at the moment," Meredith replied, both of them watching as Lilly walked over to a pink egg sitting on her teddy bear's lap.

"Mine, too," Derek smiled.

"Good job, baby girl! Can you put it in the basket?" Meredith asked her.

Lilly set her sights on the basket, then toddled toward it with confidence, as though she'd been walking her whole life. She dropped the egg in the basket before making a beeline for the kitchen off to the left, and Meredith and Derek quickly scrambled to their feet to follow her.

"Man, those little feet move fast. What is she doing?" Derek chuckled.

"Maybe it's her way of telling us she wants breakfast," Meredith joked as they finally caught up with her in the other room.

Lilly turned around, looked up at the two of them, and reached her arms out. "Mmm, nana?" she requested.

"Told you. She's a girl who knows what she wants," Meredith said proudly.

"See, now aren't you glad we baby-proofed the house way in advance?" Derek asked.

Meredith giggled, kneeling down to pick Lilly up. "Well, I don't think it needed to be done when I was six months pregnant, but yeah, I am."

...

Lilly had only been walking for four hours, and already, she was running wobbly marathon laps around the living room. Meredith side stepped a stuffed bunny toy on the floor as she chased after her daughter. "Come here, Lillybug. Mommy needs to put a new diaper on you," she said, managing to scoop her up before she could get too far.

"You got your mischievous side from Daddy," Meredith smiled. She lifted Lilly's legs and cleaned her before slipping a fresh diaper under her bottom. "I'll be quick, I promise."

"Dada," Lilly echoed.

"Yeah. You know, Dada doesn't have his dad around, and I know that makes him sad. He always talks about how much he would've loved you and me. So the way I see it, my dad's back in my life for a reason. And you know what, peanut? I think you're that reason," Meredith said, tickling Lilly's belly with her finger after fastening the new diaper around her waist.

She reached behind her to take Lilly's dress off the couch, but when she turned back around, Lilly had already darted off, clad only in her diaper. "Lilly, you need to put your dress on," Meredith laughed, the purple sundress in her hand.

There was a knock at the front door, and Lilly quickly followed after the dog into the foyer. When Meredith finally caught up with both of them, she saw Lexie staring on the other side of the glass door, mouth agape.

Meredith pushed the door open and motioned for them to enter. "Hi, come on in," she greeted.

"She walks now? Since when?" Lexie asked in surprise as she stepped over the threshold.

"Oh. Yeah, since this morning. And she's already outrunning me, which is why she's standing here in a diaper," Meredith explained, picking Lilly up and sitting her on her hip. "Lilly, can you wave hi?"

Lilly gave the group of people standing in front of her a small wave, then buried her face in Meredith's shoulder, unsure of all the new faces besides Lexie's. "She's a little shy at first. In five minutes, she'll be her chatty self, showing you all her toys. Right, peanut?"

"She got so big," Molly said, shaking Lilly's tiny hand.

"Hey, everybody. Just in time for lunch," Derek said. "Hi, Laur. Did the Easter bunny leave you lots of candy?"

"Yup! Lots and lots!" Laura exclaimed.

"Lots, huh? Think you have room for more? Because I think he left some candy here for you, too," Derek said, gesturing to the pink gift basket they'd put together for her.

Laura's eyes lit up when she saw it, already looking eager to dig in. "Mommy, can I eat some now?" she asked Molly.

"How about we eat lunch first?" Molly suggested.

"Everything is set up on the patio outback. We figured we'd take advantage of the sun," Meredith said.

"Sounds nice," Thatcher agreed, handing Derek a small basket full of gifts wrapped in cellophane. "This is for Lilly. She can open it later."

"That was really sweet. Thank you," Meredith replied as they walked past the living room toward the kitchen. "I'll be right out. I just want to put her dress on and do her hair."

"Can I help?" Laura asked, nearly five with blonde pigtails and wearing a blue dress.

Meredith smiled at her niece. "Sure you can. Could you get me some purple hair bows from her bin over there?"

"Yeah," Laura said eagerly as she ran over to the bin and knelt down in front of it. "How many?"

"Should we do pigtails like yours?" Meredith asked, slipping Lilly's purple sundress over her head.

"Yeah!" Laura took two purple bows from the bin of hair supplies, then sat down in front of the baby. "Hi, Lilly."

Lilly stared at the girl in front of her with a curious expression, but decided to test the waters. "A bay," she said, patting her plush baby doll that sat beside her on the floor.

"Is she your baby?" Laura asked, suddenly seeming far beyond her kindergarten age when she talked to Lilly.

"Baybay," Lilly said, squishing the doll in her arms before giving her to Laura.

Meredith watched the interaction as she scooped half of Lilly's hair into a pigtail. "Her baby doll is her favorite. She must really like you if she's sharing her."

"I have a doll like this at my house, only mine poops," Laura giggled.

"Lilly does plenty of that," Meredith said as she fastened the other pigtail. "You're always welcomed to help me change those diapers."

"Really?"

Meredith laughed at her excitement, nodding. "Really," she echoed. "Okay, all finished. Ready to go outside?"

"Uh huh," Laura said, extending her hand. Lilly grabbed on, and Laura helped her stand up. "Want to walk with me?"

Lilly glanced back at Meredith to make sure she was coming, too, and Meredith smiled at her. "I'm right behind you, peanut," she assured her. Once Lilly found her balance, she began walking toward the kitchen with her cousin, and the image of the two of them hand in hand made Meredith's breath catch in her throat.

Her daughter wasn't the same baby they'd brought home from the hospital ten months ago. Now she walked and talked, and soon enough, she would be blowing out the candles on her first birthday cake. As proud as she was of her little girl, Meredith wished more than anything she could make her stay little for longer.

Derek was in the kitchen setting up the sandwich platter, and he smiled when the three of them walked in. "Hi, ladies. Going outback?"

"Uh huh," Laura nodded.

Lilly looked up at him and waved as she passed by. "Hi," she greeted.

"Hi, Princess," Derek waved back.

Meredith reached for a napkin on the counter and wiped her eyes, watching as the two girls joined the others out on the back patio. "Remember when she was too little for her swing, so we put stuffed animals around her? And we had to roll the sleeves on all of her clothes because she was so tiny?"

"Yeah. I do," Derek said softly. "Hey, are you crying?"

Meredith narrowed her eyes at him. "Shut up."

"Mer, she's ten months old. She still needs us, even if she's a big, bad walker now."

"I know. I think just seeing her walk off without me really hit me," Meredith shrugged.

Derek wrapped an arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. "Know what that means?"

"What?"

"It means that she'll be just like you one day. A strong, confident, independent woman. It's a good thing," Derek assured her.

Meredith's lips curled into a small smile. "Thank you," she said. "Ready?"

"Yeah."

Much to Meredith's relief, lunch was going surprisingly smoothly. She never knew what to expect when she and her father were in the same vicinity, but so far, the awkwardness was kept at bay, much in part due to Derek's ability to keep conversations going, seamlessly transitioning from one topic to the next. Meredith's mind began to drift as she thought of the many ways she would thank him for that later on tonight when the sound of Lilly wailing snapped her back to the present.

Both she and Derek practically jumped out of their chairs when they glanced over and saw her crying on the grass, Laura next to her, trying to calm her down.

"What happened?" Meredith asked in a panic, kneeling down on the grass beside her daughter.

Streams of tears ran down Lilly's reddened cheeks, and she reached her arms toward Meredith. "Mama!" she sobbed.

"I think she tripped over her sandal," Laura said.

Derek wiped the grass strains off Lilly's hands and knees, while Meredith wiped the tears off her cheeks. "Walking for a total of six hours, and this is the first time you fell. I'd say that's pretty good, Princess," he chuckled.

"You're okay, Lillybug. You just scared yourself, that's all," Meredith soothed her, Lilly's tiny hands clinging to her shirt as she continued to cry. "I know, baby girl. How about we go have some Mommy-Lilly time inside?"

"Gonna nurse her?" Derek asked, unbuckling Lilly's culprit sandals and taking them off.

"Yeah, that should help calm her down. Do you mind just keeping everyone entertained for a while? I'll be back," Meredith said as they stood up.

"Yeah, go ahead. We're fine out here," Derek nodded.

Meredith stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "I'll thank you later," she murmured into his ear.

"Looking forward to that," Derek grinned.

Once the commotion settled, he sat back down in his chair on the patio across from Thatcher's, while Molly and Lexie went to go play with Laura, who needed people to run around with until Lilly returned.

"She's such a sweet kid," Derek said, he and Thatcher watching as Laura did cartwheels on the grass.

Thatcher smiled at his granddaughter. "Yeah, she is. Eric got deployed two months ago, so it's been hard on her not having him around," he said, the smile on his face dissolving into a frown. "Her class just had a father-daughter dance a couple weeks ago. I'm just glad I was able to fill in for him and go with her. I couldn't help but think about Meredith, though. She was around the same age Laura is now when..."

_When I left her and never looked back_, were the words he couldn't bring himself to say out loud.

"Yeah," Derek said. The sad reality of everything Meredith missed out on as a child broke his heart every time he was reminded of it. And he knew as much as Meredith shrugged it off, it hurt her, too.

"She had no backups to take her to a school dance. She had no one. But in the hour I've been here and watched her as a parent, I've seen her show more love and affection to Lilly than she ever got from Ellis," Thatcher said. "I know I probably have no right to be, because she became the person she is all on her own; but she still makes me so proud."

Derek looked at his father-in-law in sympathy. "You can be proud of her," he said, smiling at the flowery decals on Lilly's pink, strappy sandals on his lap. "I'm proud of her, too. Every day."

...

After a quiet hour spent nursing, Meredith carried a much happier Lilly downstairs, where Laura was opening the Easter basket they'd gotten her. Derek glanced over when he heard them approaching. "Hey, Princess," he greeted.

Meredith set Lilly on her feet, and the baby toddled over to him as quickly as she could. "Dada!" she shouted, breaking out into a fit of laughter when Derek scooped her into his arm and tickled her belly.

"There's my favorite sound."

"Full belly and good as new," Meredith said as she joined them on the couch.

"More Peeps, Mommy!" Laura cheered, pulling them from her basket.

"Peeps are Meredith's favorite. She must've eaten a thousand when she was pregnant," Derek chuckled, earning him a nudge in his side courtesy of Meredith's elbow. "Ouch. What? It's the truth. I had to special order them in January."

Lexie laughed as she opened the pack of Peeps for her niece. "I remember that. Whenever I flipped through a chart and found blue sugar on the pages, I knew it was one of Mer's patients."

"Want one, Aunt Meredith?" Laura offered.

"Thank you, sweetie," Meredith said, ignoring the commentary of her husband and sister as she plucked a blue bunny Peep from the stash. She bit the ears off and moaned at the sugary taste on her tongue. "Mmm. I hope you got me some of these," she told Derek.

"Well, I was gonna surprise you, but yes I did," Derek said, with full knowledge that if they didn't have company, she'd be thanking him in sexual favors. But until such time, he had to distract himself from the images going through his head. "Want to open your basket from grandpa, Lilly?"

Lilly tilted her head up toward him. "Me gigi?"

"Let's see. There might be some gigis in here," Derek said as he took the basket off the table and set it on the couch cushion next to him.

"What does gigi mean?" Molly asked.

"Egg in Lilly language. We're getting pretty fluent," Derek joked, taking the pink cellophane off the basket. "Wow, look at all this stuff, Lillybug."

Meredith smiled at her father when she saw how much time and effort he put into decorating it, and that meant more to her than all the little toys and treasures it contained. "You didn't have to do all this."

"Baybay!" Lilly squealed, pointing to something inside the basket.

Derek spotted what Lilly was looking at and picked it up, the smile on his face growing when he saw what it was. "You know who this is, Lilly? This is Mama when she was a baby."

"Mama?" Lilly asked.

Meredith studied the picture in Derek's hand, one of her on her first Easter at eight months old. She sat on the porch swing at the old house, wearing a yellow dress and a pair of pink bunny ears over her wavy, blonde hair. "I never saw this picture before," she said.

"I found it when I was reorganizing the den. The frame I put it in has two slots. I thought you could put a picture of Lilly on her first Easter on the other side," Thatcher said.

"Baybay Ma," Lilly giggled, hugging the picture to herself.

"This is adorable. Thank you," Meredith said. "We can put it on the shelf in your room with your other pictures, Lilly."

"Wow, you and Lilly really look alike in this," Molly complimented.

Meredith laughed, looking back and forth between Lilly and the picture in the frame. "Trust me, I'm holding onto this. Sometimes, I swear my genes battled Derek's and forfeited my half of Lilly's DNA. This is proof that she's actually half me."

...

Derek scooped a sleeping Lilly from the bathtub, careful not to wake her up. He quickly passed her over to Meredith, who wrapped her in a towel to keep her warm.

"Usually she loves splashing in the water until it's barely warm anymore. She wore herself out today," Derek said, dumping the water from the tub into the sink.

Meredith rocked back and forth on her heels out of habit, Lilly's wet hair soaking through her shirt. "I know. Between the house and the yard, she probably ran five miles."

"Those little feet worked hard today," Derek chuckled as he and Meredith walked into their bedroom to put Lilly in her pajamas.

"The same ones that used to kick me from the inside every day and night, and you would have to tell her stories about fly fishing to get her to sleep," Meredith said, laying Lilly down on their bed and unwrapping her from the bath towel. "I love these chubby, little feet. Everything about her, actually."

Derek smiled at his daughter, who scrunched her nose in her sleep. "Hmm, me too," he said, sitting on one side of the bed while Meredith sat on the other. "So your dad and I were talking today."

Meredith held up Lilly's legs to slide a diaper under her bottom. "About?" she asked curiously.

"You. He's so proud of you, Meredith. You're sweet; you're patient. You practically knocked the chair over trying to get to Lilly after she fell."

"So did you," Meredith reminded him.

"You know what I mean," Derek said, rubbing Lilly's skin with her lavender baby lotion while Meredith combed her wet curls. "You're the best mom Lilly could've ever hoped to have. And no one taught you how. You just are."

Meredith looked up at him and smiled slightly. "He said all that?"

"Yeah. He knows he wasn't around to be your dad, but he wants to be there as Lilly's grandpa. He wants to be involved. We're actually going golfing on Sunday over at Greenlake," Derek said as he shimmied Lilly's legs into her Elmo pajama pants.

"Really?" she asked.

Derek nodded. "Yeah."

"Just you and my dad?"

"Yeah. Maybe Mark, if he wants to come along," Derek said. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah. You've been wanting to plan something with him for a while now. It's good," Meredith promised, the two of them weaving Lilly's arms into her shirt. "I don't have to go, do I?"

"As much as I would love that, no," Derek laughed before smirking at her. "I know there's only one athletic activity you enjoy."

"That's correct. So as soon as Lilly's tucked away in her crib, you and I are having Easter sex," Meredith said, covering Lilly's ears for the latter part of her sentence.

"Easter sex," Derek echoed. "That sounds wrong on so many levels."

"Oh, plus, you're getting sexual favors for the entire cabinet of Peeps you got me," Meredith said. She picked Lilly up off the bed and kissed her forehead. "I'm so glad you're asleep and have no idea what we're talking about."

"Me, too," Derek agreed, gently taking Lilly from Meredith. "How about I go put her to bed, and when I get back, you're N-A-K-E-D and ready to go?"

"Deal," Meredith said. "Goodnight, Lillybug. Love you."

Derek pressed kisses to Lilly's cheek as he walked her down the hall toward her nursery. "This was the best Easter ever. Do you know why?" he whispered. "Because of you. Although, I have to give the Peeps some credit, too."

...

**(P.S... my birthday is on Sunday. Reviews make awesome presents! ;)**


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